"Sarah Paulson"

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Speaker 1 Well, what do I say? I don't know what I say. What do I do? All right, so I'm going to finish my peanut butter.

Speaker 1 Which is probably really annoying to hear me chew a peanut butter sandwich. What What might be a little better is

Speaker 1 this is my apple juice.

Speaker 1 Guys, if this episode of Smartless is as delicious as my lunch is right now, you guys are fucking set. Welcome to Smartless.
Smart

Speaker 1 List

Speaker 1 I have a 1.30 pickup and a 2 o'clock crew call and 2.30 shoot time.

Speaker 1 Wow.

Speaker 1 So Jason's describing his first day of work, which is tomorrow at a fish market at 2 in the morning. He has to shoot.

Speaker 1 In a real fish market, that's smelly and stinky.

Speaker 1 Yeah, the hours of operation is 2 to 6 a.m. So that's when we have to be there.
And,

Speaker 1 you know, there was a time in my life when I enjoyed those hours of the day. Sure.
But I don't anymore. So my first day is going to be,

Speaker 1 I'm going to try to be warm. I'm going to try to be wet.
That's going to be rough.

Speaker 1 That's two in the morning is rough. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I don't know. I guess I'm going to go to sleep at six or something, try to sleep for a little bit.
Or should I just stay up? Should I just go get a big fat bag of white and stay up all night? Will?

Speaker 1 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Let's go.
Should I just start counting days again? No, no, no, let's just pump the brakes on that.

Speaker 1 Okay. So I said to Jay, he was thinking of opening first day gifts or whatever, you know, start gifts.

Speaker 1 And last night I was with Will, Jason, and I said to Amanda, I said, the cookie thing, there's like a new place in New York that makes pie cookies. Can you believe Sean knows about that? And

Speaker 1 they also make croissants stuffed with cookie dough. It's amazing.
Christ.

Speaker 1 Yeah. And I'm

Speaker 1 just stuffed with cookie dough.

Speaker 1 That's right. Yeah.
And what do you think I said to that pitch as

Speaker 1 start gifts? Do you think it was a no or do you think it was a yes?

Speaker 1 Well, I'm just trying to imagine your tone. I bet it wasn't

Speaker 1 considered friendly. No.

Speaker 1 It was very judgy. Yeah, it shut me down immediately.

Speaker 1 Sean and I were talking on the weekend. We saw each other last night.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's what Sean just said. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And we were with your wife, and I spent a lot of time with your wife last night. Whoa, whoa, a lot of time.

Speaker 1 We started talking about,

Speaker 1 I've been freaked out this weekend. And Sean, I mentioned this to you.
We started talking about it because you read, I sent you the article, JB, I sent you the article about kids with smartphones.

Speaker 1 Yes. Yes.
And it's been freaking me out. And that guy, Jonathan Hayde, wrote that book, Anxious Generations.
This is crazy. And it's kind of, I spent the weekend like talking to my kids about it and,

Speaker 1 you know, what this smartphone has done to this young generation and like the super increased rates of depression, anxiety, anxiety,

Speaker 1 even sadly, suicide, of course.

Speaker 1 And it's like, it's really bummed me out. And I've just been like,

Speaker 1 well, what'd the boys say about it? Well, I, you know,

Speaker 1 talked to him about it. I did.
I talked to him a little bit about it, and I said, you know, what you've got to remember is that these,

Speaker 1 some of these, these companies are trying to, there are people out there who knew that this stuff would be addictive to you guys, and they and they fed it to you and like big tobacco

Speaker 1 but

Speaker 1 in a way in a way in a similar way and i was like how does that make you feel like do you feel angry and they were like yeah i feel kind of pissed off because i feel duped look we're all guilty of it we were talking last night like how many times you're talking to somebody and you've got your phone and you go hang on sorry what like your your attention is divided right and so i do it as an adult and imagine what that does if you're a teen it's even harder And this is a moment where you're establishing your neural pathways.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 I said to Sean, I go, the richest man, my 13-year-old, has the same phone as the richest man in the world.

Speaker 1 It's crazy. Yeah, they're all the same phones.
I don't let, I'm nervous about my kids like

Speaker 1 going out or walking around the corner or whatever. And yet I'll let them get on their phone and go to the far deep reaches of the internet.
I don't know. I got to change.

Speaker 1 Anyway, that's been kind of dominating my thinking. Something to do, something to figure out.
Something to figure out. Well, how are they, are they able to manage boredom?

Speaker 1 Like, do they have coping skills for like riding in an elevator and not doing anything except staring at the wall or sitting at a red light and watching traffic go by?

Speaker 1 You know, like that's something we had no choice but to get comfortable with. And it, it has, I'm glad I have that.
skill.

Speaker 1 I would be very anxious without the skill of managing boredom.

Speaker 1 And that boredom led to creative thinking. Thought, yeah, exactly.
Do you want to hear my thoughts when I'm sitting in a red light? Can I guess? Yeah, you can guess.

Speaker 1 There's a fart joke in here somewhere.

Speaker 1 The thoughts are glazed her cake.

Speaker 1 Sprinkled her nose sprinkle. Hot fudge, hot fudge, caramel, fuck it both.
So I don't want a phone taking all that away from me. Hot fudge, caramel, fuck it both.
Hot fudge, caramel, fuck it both.

Speaker 1 Fuck it both.

Speaker 1 All right. Anyway, look at.
I'm not, we're not going to. This is.
We're not going to solve it today, but yeah, but it's food for thought. This is someone who's as delicious as Glazed or Cake.

Speaker 1 She is extraordinary. She is a hoot and a half, a real firecracker.
She has a Starburst tattoo on her right foot.

Speaker 2 What?

Speaker 1 Yes. As an actress, her body of work is ridiculously vast, and yet she's still younger than any of us.

Speaker 1 Known in Hollywood for her transformative character work and strength on screen, you might be surprised to learn that her fear of flying goes as far as needing to meet every pilot before takeoff

Speaker 1 assess her skill set when not in a cockpit, you could probably find her working on a Ryan Murphy project or 12 of them. It's the lovely and delightful and our good friend Sarah Paul.

Speaker 1 Sarah, get your ass out here.

Speaker 2 Sarah Paul says I covered the camera with toilet paper.

Speaker 1 Toilet paper, I'm sure you did. It would have been better if it was clean.
Clean, but use toilet paper. It's not clean.

Speaker 2 Are you in the bathroom?

Speaker 2 I'm upstairs. I'm upstairs.
Yeah, near a bathroom.

Speaker 1 You live

Speaker 1 in your apartment in New York?

Speaker 2 I don't live in New York. I'm just here while I'm doing the play.

Speaker 1 But

Speaker 1 this is your apartment. We're visiting you in your apartment while you're doing the play.

Speaker 2 I'm actually staying at a friend's apartment, renting that apartment.

Speaker 1 Gotcha.

Speaker 1 And the play

Speaker 1 we should mention. It's at the Tabasco Theater, by the way.

Speaker 1 It's at the Spicy Tabasco Theater. That's really the Belasco.

Speaker 1 That's where Sean won his Tony.

Speaker 1 And Sarah's well on her way to hers.

Speaker 1 It's the golden touch of that theater, Sarah, I'm telling you. In her incredible play called Appropriate.
Everybody, if you're...

Speaker 2 No, Appropriate.

Speaker 1 Oh, really? Yeah. Okay, so talk about that because we were like, it's spelled the same.
And I was like, oh, I didn't know this. It's true.

Speaker 1 So are we supposed to think that it's both appropriate and appropriate?

Speaker 2 Well, I think at the beginning of the play, there's that sign, right? That sort of drop in front of the curtain that describes all of the various ways in which the noun and the verb.

Speaker 2 Yeah, the noun and the verb.

Speaker 1 What is Will doing? Hi, Sarah. I'm just saying that there's a lot of people who are.
He's working on a smartphone. Well, we don't really know you.

Speaker 1 No, I got some notification to verify that it's me on my Google. I don't know, but I was listening, and what I was thinking was...
Excuse me, just exactly.

Speaker 1 At least I listened more than you did. At least I listened more than you did when you were going to see her play appropriate.
Clearly.

Speaker 1 Thanks, Will. Yeah, Will is.

Speaker 1 You both miss it. I missed seeing the play.
Now, Sarah, I don't really know you like these guys do. So hush.
Then hush. Hush, but let us talk.
Yeah. Okay.
Go ahead. Go ahead.

Speaker 2 Weirdly, I wanted to talk to Will. I mean, I know you both.

Speaker 1 Sean and I'll take a tight five. More interested in take a tight five.

Speaker 1 But why is it appropriate, appropriate instead of appropriate? I think appropriate could work just beautifully.

Speaker 1 I think it could.

Speaker 2 And I think it's why he offers both options at the beginning of the play because all of it is applicable. But I think I did ask him directly.
It is appropriate.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 1 I think he's wrong.

Speaker 2 I think he's wrong. I'm going to tell him.

Speaker 1 Wait, so I want to do, so we went backstage. First of all, go see the play.
It's amazing. You're phenomenal in it, especially that last monologue was incredible.

Speaker 1 You're standing on the stairs and it's like you're scarlet, whatever, and you're just like, it's incredible. It's incredible.
Thanks, Sean. It's really, really great.
That's very kind of you, Sean.

Speaker 1 By the way,

Speaker 1 I love that thing, too.

Speaker 1 People are like, you know, I was talking about it afterwards to friends.

Speaker 1 That thing about, it's too long to go into what the whole play is about because it's about a lot of things. But your character with your two brothers go back to the home where

Speaker 1 your father died and you're sorting out business and you find all of these

Speaker 1 questionable things in his past, like pictures of things and other stuff that bring up a bunch of questions about your family and your upbringing.

Speaker 1 And at the end of the play, I thought it was so profound when you were like, and please fill in the blanks, but you're talking to your two brothers and you're like, I'm the oldest of this family.

Speaker 1 I got to hold you and watch you and see all of the things that create your memories, but nobody's ever held me or was there for me.

Speaker 2 Nobody's left in the family who's done that for me.

Speaker 1 For me, yeah. It was really powerful.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Well, it seems appropriate.

Speaker 1 It's definitely not appropriate. That's why we hired a lot of people.
It's definitely not. Well, because that's a completely different meaning.

Speaker 2 No, I mean, Jason has a lot of skills, but this one particular assessment is not one of them.

Speaker 1 I tell you what, do yourself a favor, don't ask either of them to define it because it'll be embarrassing for everybody. So moving forward.
I want to talk about flying and your fear of flying.

Speaker 1 Like why that? Sorry, before we move you on the play, Will, are you going to find some time to come see the play? Yeah. I am.

Speaker 1 I'm going to see the play. I had to.

Speaker 1 What's the date on that?

Speaker 1 Just so Sarah can be ready.

Speaker 2 You know, I hate knowing when people are out there. So don't tell me.

Speaker 1 Just give her a ballpark. I'd say it, but she hates knowing.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 All right. I wanted to, because I was going to say, I was about to tell you, and then she's like, I hate that.

Speaker 2 You've got till June 23rd, buddy, but I don't want to know. I don't want to know.
You know, I don't like to know what

Speaker 2 I don't like to know when people are coming. I don't care if it's your dry cleaner.
I don't care if it's your dentist.

Speaker 2 I end up thinking too much about whether or not it's my codependent, my kind of hyper-vigilant way of being in the world.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I'm just wondering, like, even any of my castmates, I don't want to know if your fourth-grade teacher was there. I'm wondering.

Speaker 1 I thought you were going to say, I don't want to know if you're in the play tonight.

Speaker 1 Well, that too.

Speaker 1 This is how I ended up with three kids.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Because people didn't want to know when I was coming. Listen, let me tell you something, Sarah.
Sorry. Let me tell you something.

Speaker 1 Let me tell you something, Sarah.

Speaker 1 Let me you.

Speaker 1 Sarah, let me tell you, Sarah. Here's what I'm going to do.
I want to show you. And I have so much respect for you as an artist.
Unlike these guys. I do too.
Unlike these guys.

Speaker 2 Jason's quiet, by the way.

Speaker 1 I'm not going to tell you. I'm not going to tell you when I'm going to come to see this show.

Speaker 1 I'm not going to come and see the show. And I'm not going to tell you afterwards.
So you won't even know I was there.

Speaker 1 Okay? Because I respect you.

Speaker 2 That works.

Speaker 2 That works. I respect you.

Speaker 1 That works for me. Sarah, how is that at the end?

Speaker 1 Where, you know, for Tracy in Wisconsin, it is a practice, a habit, an obligation for anyone in the audience who knows a cast member, or even if you don't know them, you just happen to be famous.

Speaker 1 You are obsessed with this. You are obligated to go backstage and introduce yourself to the cast and visit for a bit.
And if you don't, apparently that's tantamount to giving it a bad review.

Speaker 1 And so, how do you like that dance there at the end where you're done with the play, you're exhausted, and now you got to socialize?

Speaker 2 It's not my favorite. Although I will tell you, we've had a couple of fancy famouses come and not come backstage.
And we all collectively discuss that we think it means that they didn't like it. Yeah.

Speaker 2 But then we sort of think, well, but think about it this way.

Speaker 2 So you're so famous, you think somehow that the cast whom you do not know wants you to come backstage and announce yourself to bequeath them with your great.

Speaker 2 it's so weird so it's that there's no way to win yeah you can't but we have had discussions about you know there was like some fancy person who came who had worked with someone in the play who didn't come back and it was like well no that is a communication that they just don't like you yeah

Speaker 1 so can i ask you if i maybe not the whole play just you yeah if if if before june 23rd i find myself at the uh tabasco theater yeah and and i've seen the play and i've and i've enjoyed it and i i'm the first one to my feet and my hands hurt from all the clapping

Speaker 1 and and I'm just, and I'm hooting and hollering. And then there's the moment.

Speaker 1 If you guys find out that I'm there and I don't come back stage,

Speaker 1 do you and your cast want me there? And there's a thumbs up. I just want to really make a point of this.

Speaker 1 Do you guys, do you and your cast, Apple device, do you guys want me there? Or do you...

Speaker 2 I think we would discuss that we thought Will Arnett didn't like the play. Really?

Speaker 2 That's what we would discuss.

Speaker 1 And what if he didn't like the play? This is all I want.

Speaker 1 What if he doesn't like the play and he comes back stage and he and he lets you know he thinks he's got helpful notes for you? He says, yeah, yeah, no, I enjoyed it.

Speaker 1 However, like, has anyone come back there and popped off about how you can make it fucking better?

Speaker 1 That has not happened, although I would kind of welcome it, actually, just

Speaker 2 simply so I could discuss it with other people about the outreach.

Speaker 1 I did do a play once.

Speaker 2 I will tell you, I did do a play once. My last time I was on stage, I did a play called Tally's Folly at the roundabout.
And thank you for the applause.

Speaker 2 And the actress, and I'm going to say this, and I'm not going to ask you to cut this out because I don't fucking care.

Speaker 1 This actress came to the play. Her name is Trish Hawkins.
Hi, Trish. Hi, Trisha.

Speaker 2 Trish Hawkins came to this play. Am I going to get sued? I don't care because I think this is outrageous.
She came to the play. If it's true, and I proceeded, my mother brought her to the play.

Speaker 2 They were in some kind of like writing group together. And my mother thought it'd be great to bring Trish Hawkins to the play.
I mean, this is a whole other conversation about my mom. Hi, mom.

Speaker 2 But she came to the play, proceeded to say, she looked at me and sort of up and down. And then she went,

Speaker 2 your dress is yellow. Mine was pink.

Speaker 1 And I thought, oh, she did the character before you.

Speaker 2 Cut to two days later, I got an email that was six pages long of notes and a communication to me about what she had done. when she had done the play.
Oh, Jesus Christ. What she recommended I do.

Speaker 1 Oh my God.

Speaker 2 It was outrageous. Oh my gosh.
It was really outrageous. Trish Hawkins, I have not forgotten it, and I hope to see you never.
That's what I'm saying.

Speaker 1 You still have the letter?

Speaker 2 I have it. I do have it.

Speaker 1 And did you talk to your mother and say, please delete her numbers?

Speaker 2 I didn't. I sort of just, you know, put it back in the file of things my mother has done.

Speaker 1 That's good, though. You need to save that.
Sarah, Sarah, can I just say that? I need to say something. I need to interject.
If you don't mind. Yeah, okay.
I don't know you as well as these guys, and

Speaker 1 I have a real feeling that you and I are going to be better friends than they could ever imagine. I love you for saying that so fucking much.
Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 You two would be inseparable.

Speaker 1 Sarah, I have all the time when people and when they fucking deserve it.

Speaker 2 Now, by the way, this is the deal.

Speaker 2 You cannot come to you want to, if you're my dearest friend and we go have a cocktail or a, you know, a little breadbasket, Jason, or some air that we might eat, Jason. But, you know,

Speaker 1 post the show.

Speaker 2 Yeah, you might eat some air.

Speaker 1 Air is so tasty sometimes after a show, though. It's really wild

Speaker 1 how good it can be.

Speaker 2 But if you are a person that I love and admire, and I say to you, tell me what you thought really. And give me some,

Speaker 2 especially like early days previews or something.

Speaker 1 All right, thank God. Okay, so here's okay.
So here it is. So at the top of the show,

Speaker 1 but I would say this for Trish. I will say this for Trish, Sarah.
It's we have Trisha's here, by the way. Trisha's up here.

Speaker 1 She's right here. You're getting

Speaker 1 away. Yeah, my mom will probably trot her out.

Speaker 2 Try to bring her to the next play.

Speaker 1 By the way, oh, Sarah, I also have a mom who says a lot of inappropriate stuff. What are you doing? We all do.

Speaker 2 My mom also, my mom's going to get so upset about this, but like Kate Blanchett came to the play the same night that my mother came, same afternoon that my mother came. And Margo Martindale came also.

Speaker 2 And all these people that I love and I have long relationships with, and I've worked with Kate three times. I've worked with Margo more than once.
And I, of course, was really happy to see them.

Speaker 2 And I was, I'm not saying I wasn't happy to see my mom, but it was like, maybe the the range was a little like,

Speaker 2 oh my God, Kate. And oh my God, Margo.

Speaker 1 And it was like, hey, mom. Hey, mom.
You know, it was like, and she didn't like that.

Speaker 2 And I don't think she loved it. And I think her, her, her way, her retribution is to just give me like a little less than I would have hoped for.
Yes.

Speaker 1 Because, because I think I'm getting her, it's just got to keep me a little.

Speaker 2 Yeah. And she was like, I mean, I know we're supposed to go out.
I don't know why I'm making my mom sound like this like granddom of like Fifth Avenue or something.

Speaker 2 That's, she's really like the granddom of Woodstock. She's like a tambourine playing, you know.
Hey, mom. I mean, I'm really sorry.
I'm just disparaging you for my own comedy interests.

Speaker 1 No, no, no, no.

Speaker 2 But it's reality. It's my reality.
I'm allowed to talk about my reality, right?

Speaker 1 Yeah, why?

Speaker 2 Trish Hawkins, my mom. They belong to

Speaker 1 the story.

Speaker 1 Trish used to love Smartless. She loved it every week.
She loved it. And I tell you what,

Speaker 1 we're getting about 25 million listeners per month. Trisha's about to get the bombardment she never knew she was.

Speaker 2 She deserves, by the way, the one she deserves.

Speaker 1 She brought it on. She's a guess.

Speaker 2 I'm going to put that email on Instagram faster than you can say, Trish Hawkins.

Speaker 1 We're going to put it in the chat. Oh,

Speaker 1 God.

Speaker 1 And we will be right back.

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Speaker 1 Sarah Paulson, I want to talk about the fear of flying. You're my hero.
Can I just say you're my hero? And you haven't even gotten into your shared fear of flying. Oh, you have this too.
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 Oh, God. So we're best friends.

Speaker 2 When's your birthday? Hate to be, not to be too Amanda Anka about it, but when's your birthday?

Speaker 1 Yeah. Oh, God, we're even better friends.
May 4th. May 4th.
May 4th, yeah. Okay.
4th of May. All right.
So that's good.

Speaker 1 What sign is that? I just want to know what your sign is. Taurus.
I mean, Taurus.

Speaker 2 And what's your rising? Do we know what your rising is?

Speaker 1 Gemini. Oh,

Speaker 1 yeah.

Speaker 2 What's your mood? I'm a Sagittarius with a Virgo rising in an Aquarius moon.

Speaker 1 So, you know, do with that way. And you believe in all that stuff.
I don't. I mean, I don't know enough about it.

Speaker 2 I do kind of think it's a thing. But anyway, the feared flying

Speaker 2 is very real for me.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 2 There's a lot of weeping that happens if there's a tiny pocket of...

Speaker 2 Really?

Speaker 1 You go right into the window. Right into the crying.

Speaker 2 The grabbing the stranger next to me. I know you guys haven't been on a commercial airplane in a very long time, but if you.

Speaker 1 That's not true. I was on a Falcon last week.

Speaker 1 Is that not?

Speaker 1 He doesn't like the Falcons. The Falcons he thinks are beneath him.

Speaker 2 The planes are even scarier to me. I don't enjoy it.

Speaker 1 More room for us. Wait, Sarah, Sarah, Sarah, I want to talk.
So you,

Speaker 1 here's my thing about pilots, and I love hearing that you like to meet the pilot before.

Speaker 1 What I do is I like to say to the pilots,

Speaker 1 how are we looking, right, for our journey? Because what I don't enjoy is if you get on a flight and you have a bunch of turbulence and the pilot doesn't say anything, he doesn't come over to the

Speaker 1 bottom.

Speaker 2 It's the lack of communication. I can't stand it.

Speaker 1 Just go, hey, just to say,

Speaker 1 it's running the mill turbulence. It's not a big deal.
We're all good. We're blah, blah, blah, blah.
But you know, but the side, but Sarah, do you have this too?

Speaker 1 Because I have a little bit of this too. The second you hear that

Speaker 1 and right before the pilot speaks, you're like, oh, Jesus, what is this?

Speaker 2 It makes me sweat.

Speaker 1 They should come on beforehand, right?

Speaker 1 We've got some bumps coming.

Speaker 2 They give you a lay of the land, which is why I like to talk to them because I say the same thing. How are we looking?

Speaker 2 They often pull up the iPad with the root and they show me where the pockets of potential weather. They show me.

Speaker 1 This is there on Delta, United.

Speaker 2 I like Delta, personally.

Speaker 1 Delta Delta's a sponsor.

Speaker 1 Well, you know what it is? You know why? Because you know what it is?

Speaker 1 This is a relationship. And the relationships really work with communication.
So you need to have this communication. Hey, why don't you

Speaker 1 grow up, Sean, for a second? Then take five, okay? Because Sarah and I are talking about relationships.

Speaker 1 You're back on a tight five.

Speaker 1 Sarah, why don't you why? Wait a second. When's the last time you had a bunch of passengers stop by the cockpit and ask for what was going on?

Speaker 1 No, Jason, when you walk on the cockpit, you open, it's right there. Yeah, it's right right there.

Speaker 1 But if everybody stopped and asked to look at the iPad for the I'm not asking to look at the iPad, I'm asking how we're doing.

Speaker 2 And they often pull out the iPad as a way of saying, here's what we're doing. I ask them how the plane looks, who did the checkout, like who went around and checked out the plane.

Speaker 2 I want to know how long they've been flying.

Speaker 1 I want to ask for a little hint as to what chair the Marshal's sitting in, just for fun.

Speaker 2 Sometimes I've done that.

Speaker 1 What if it's Sarah? What if you're like, how long have you been flying? It's some 20-year-old. He's like, I'm just flown for one week.

Speaker 1 Today's day one.

Speaker 2 Well, I want you to know that is literally every single pilot joke that is made to me every time I ask them, like, oh, today's my first day. I'm like, no, no, no, no, no, not funny at all.

Speaker 1 Wish me luck, it just was eponomized. Yeah.

Speaker 2 And sometimes there are, you know, the young

Speaker 2 co-pilot has fewer years and fewer hours.

Speaker 1 How about this? How about I don't like to meet the pilots because if I meet the pilots, it becomes too human to me. And I don't like to imagine the fact that a human being is even possible.

Speaker 1 You can't fly a plane if it does, right?

Speaker 1 Like, I like to see a film. Do you trust a robot more than a human He would trust human, intelligent people up there that wouldn't even spend a minute with me.
Like they're doing adult work up there.

Speaker 1 He sits down, he sits in his seat, and

Speaker 1 he plugs a Type-C

Speaker 1 plug into the side of his head, and it goes into the side of the plane. And then he just power down.
He started speaking.

Speaker 1 Don't power down, Jason. Exchange information.

Speaker 1 Just there's like a sign.

Speaker 1 In five hours.

Speaker 1 So,

Speaker 1 Sarah, are you also

Speaker 1 a type of gal likes to chat with the Uber driver?

Speaker 2 Nope. Don't want to talk to the Uber driver.

Speaker 1 You have that already clicked on your profile there.

Speaker 1 No chitting.

Speaker 2 Oh, no, I don't. I did see that, but I thought that was rude.

Speaker 1 To click on it, to make a point out.

Speaker 2 To click on it, to make it like a rule for them. Yeah.
I'd rather just let

Speaker 2 my behavior and my demeanor communicate.

Speaker 1 So if you got into the Uber and the guy started asking you a question, you would just stop him and say, check my profile. Right? Well, yeah, no, exactly.

Speaker 1 I mean, think about the kind of vibe you got to kick out to hand

Speaker 1 to get him to be quiet is more rude than him being pre-warned that this person's not up for a conversation.

Speaker 2 If I think I feel really uncomfortable in general in a car where someone's driving, I have to chat senselessly just what if there was a box for smart lists and you just checked it, I'd rather not chat today.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 I would say

Speaker 1 if they tried talking to me, I was

Speaker 1 going, why won't you? And I just go, sorry, man, my leprosy is flaring up. You know what I mean?

Speaker 1 Wait, sir. So I love this stuff because you're not only afraid of

Speaker 1 flying, but clowns, sharks, bees, and then you have

Speaker 1 tripophobia? Tripophobia.

Speaker 2 I have that tripophobia trip. I can't trip it.
I don't actually know how it's pronounced. Like Jason doesn't know about appropriate, appropriate, but it's tripophobia, tripophobia.

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 1 It's like, so it's probably triptophan. It's probably, no, it's not fear of tryptophan.

Speaker 2 It's fear of...

Speaker 1 holes.

Speaker 2 It's fear of like... Holes.
So like if

Speaker 1 a group of holes. So like if you like a group of a grouping, a whole grouping.
I've heard of this before.

Speaker 2 Like a natural sponge makes me like actually I have to or a coral reef not interesting.

Speaker 1 Wow.

Speaker 1 What about an English muffin?

Speaker 2 No, it's not.

Speaker 1 Those are nooks and crannies. Those aren't holes.

Speaker 1 Those are nooks and crannies.

Speaker 2 Those are nooks and crannies, Sean.

Speaker 1 Swiss cheese Rex your night?

Speaker 2 No, because they're not close enough together. It's about when they're packed tight.

Speaker 1 Right. So a loofah.
No, thank you.

Speaker 2 I don't like a loofah at all.

Speaker 1 So what's the reaction and what?

Speaker 2 It makes my skin crawl and I have I have to run away.

Speaker 2 And Ryan Murphy decided that this was so funny that he decided to make a season of American Horror Story about a character that I played who was, who had this disorder.

Speaker 2 So then I was constantly all day long having to look at these things and run from them, clowns as well and things.

Speaker 1 That sounds like bullying. That sounds like bullying.
Exactly.

Speaker 1 Did that get you past your fears or did it make it worse?

Speaker 2 It kept it

Speaker 2 at a

Speaker 2 steady place.

Speaker 1 I've never kept it on high.

Speaker 2 But the B thing you know i've never been not to bring up my mother again but my mom you know that's what this is about she locked me outside

Speaker 1 she deserves it

Speaker 2 one day my mother determined that the bees would be should be something i should get comfortable with because you know obviously they do a lot for our planet they're wonderful they're great

Speaker 2 i had never been stung when i was yeah exactly dirty hippie and so uh i i had not been stung at that point and i still at the ripe old age of 49 have not been stung by a bee because i will drop a baby i'm not kidding I will

Speaker 2 drop a baby, a tiny baby, and flee.

Speaker 2 I'm not kidding.

Speaker 1 I cannot. I'm not really afraid of bees.

Speaker 2 You are not. Are you really?

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. I really don't like that.
It's my kryptonite. I'm allergic.

Speaker 2 Have you been stung, though?

Speaker 1 I've been stung twice, I think. Not only that.

Speaker 2 I think I might be making it into something that is, or I'm actually deathly allergic.

Speaker 1 And it's my, you know, no, mine's gotten less

Speaker 1 as I've gotten older.

Speaker 1 But I, the thing for me is that you can't feel them when they land on you. And so the shock of the sting is just going to come out of nowhere as opposed to,

Speaker 1 you know, if I'm like, if I'm in a fight with a bee and he gets the better of me, then

Speaker 1 I'm not going to be, you know, I'm going to get stuck. What if you had super tiny boxing gloves on and they did two? And you're just like.
God, that's a great idea, Sean. You stupid fucking dick.

Speaker 1 You guys want to hear my ultimate kink, my ultimate fantasy? And I'm very quality. Uh-oh, here we go.
Oh, okay. I'm getting stung by a bee where I'm sitting on a big sponge going through turbulence.

Speaker 1 With clowns. Going through turbulence, yeah.
With a clown pilot, with a clown pilot. You would literally die with a clown for a pilot.
Yeah, you go up there and you go, how are we looking at it?

Speaker 1 You go, pretty good.

Speaker 1 All right, Sean, start a fucking question.

Speaker 1 We're 40 minutes into this thing. You haven't answered a question.

Speaker 1 There's the one question that Michael Terry wrote for you. You've got nothing.

Speaker 1 I've been trying trying so much.

Speaker 1 But I like this stuff more interesting because everybody knows who you are. Everybody knows your work.
And I want to talk about that.

Speaker 1 But I want to talk about your tattoos first because you have a lot of them. And I want to know.
I did not know that. You

Speaker 1 kind of like a lot of tattoos

Speaker 1 and all kinds of toys. She's all tattoos.

Speaker 1 I got tats everywhere.

Speaker 1 I was just saying yesterday. I was just saying, nothing says don't hire me like a neck tattoo.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Well, she doesn't have them on the neck.
I have one on the back of my neck. That's okay.

Speaker 1 It's the face forward, it's the face tattoos and the neck tattoos. It's like, and I'm sure there are people like,

Speaker 1 and like the comments, like,

Speaker 1 you.

Speaker 1 Neck tattoo saved my life. I don't care.
But

Speaker 1 my neck tattoo saved my life.

Speaker 1 But on your right forearm, it says, I love this. It's a Steven Sondheim lyric.

Speaker 2 I know that Jason's going to make fun of this pretty much.

Speaker 1 Okay, but I love it. I love this.
I'm going to say I'm just a storyteller. Nope, but it's not.
It's not not that. You're safe.

Speaker 1 You want to say what it is?

Speaker 2 You want to say it?

Speaker 1 I want to say it because I love it.

Speaker 1 It's from Sunday in the Park with George, right? 5, 6, 7, 8. Anything you do, let it come from you.

Speaker 1 Anything you do, let it come from you, then it will be new.

Speaker 2 Yeah. See, Jason hates it.

Speaker 1 I do. He's flinging it.
I love it. His mouth is going.

Speaker 1 Can I punch it off a little bit?

Speaker 1 Is it too late? Well, it's temporary.

Speaker 2 So he might have an opinion. No, it's not temporary.

Speaker 1 It's on the box.

Speaker 1 You could add to it. You could do.

Speaker 2 I could add to it, but there was actually a line that I took out of it because I thought it was too pompous.

Speaker 1 What's that? What was it?

Speaker 2 Which was give them more to see. As if I could do something like that.

Speaker 1 So how would the quote have been, Goat?

Speaker 2 It would have been, anything you do, let it come from you, then it will be new. Give them more to see.
This is a musical about George Seurat, the painter.

Speaker 2 Mandy Patanki played, Bernadette Peters did, and it's basically her singing to him. It's a song from a song called

Speaker 2 Move On, you know, get out of your sort of

Speaker 2 get out of your rut, your artistic rut. And that's nice.

Speaker 1 If you want to kind of, if you want to sort of take it away, take away a little bit

Speaker 1 so it doesn't seem too poppous, you could just put comma JK.

Speaker 1 You don't know. Could you imagine?

Speaker 1 All right, let's get into Sarah Paulson and how you started. And I want to know, like...
Sarah, I'm so sorry about your decision today to be with us. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Florida, right? Where in Florida?

Speaker 2 Florida. Tampa, Florida.

Speaker 1 You were born? And how old were you when you moved to Maine?

Speaker 2 I was born in Tampa, Florida.

Speaker 2 We moved to Maine when I was in the... How old are you in the second grade?

Speaker 1 Seven.

Speaker 1 Seven. Yep.

Speaker 2 So I moved there in second grade. But we moved to New York first.
It was New York when I was five.

Speaker 1 And then Maine and then back to New York.

Speaker 2 And then Maine and then I went back to Florida, then back to New York where I moved a lot of places. My mom was a young, young mom.

Speaker 1 This is fascinating. Your mom worked at Sardie's on Broadway, which is right next to the house.
It was her first job when she was crazy. Wow.

Speaker 1 I mean, was she an actress as well? No, a writer. Oh, wow.
And she was a young mom?

Speaker 2 21. She had me at 21 and my sister at 23.
So, you know, we can kind of forgive the Trish Hawkins situation because she just doesn't know what to do.

Speaker 1 Trish Hawkins.

Speaker 1 And daddy, if you don't mind me asking,

Speaker 2 young dad? No, in the picture, still in Florida.

Speaker 1 Really? You know?

Speaker 1 were they ever married?

Speaker 2 They were married. They were married very briefly.

Speaker 2 Divorced by the time I was two and my sister was 10 months old.

Speaker 1 Still could have been your fault, though. Sorry.
Yeah, definitely. If you were colicky or something like that.

Speaker 2 Yeah, he was like, God, this colicky baby.

Speaker 1 Always wanting to sing these anti-songs.

Speaker 1 Wait, so, Sarah, so tell me telling me about that story about your mom.

Speaker 2 Telling me about the story.

Speaker 1 Telling me about the about the story about the story.

Speaker 1 Telling me about the story.

Speaker 1 About your mom seeing a psychic at some point and telling what? And saying what? I knew you were going to say that. No, your mom, when you were a kid.

Speaker 2 My mom went to a psychic when she was, when I guess I was young. And she said something like, you know, your daughter's going to live a really non-traditional life.

Speaker 2 Yeah. And she's not going to do things sort of by the book.

Speaker 1 And did she tell you that's what the psychic said?

Speaker 2 She told me that, but after I was older and fell in love with a woman, and then she was like, well, I had the psychic tell me that this was going to happen.

Speaker 2 Because to her, that that was sort of living a non-traditional life which you know not the acting part

Speaker 1 not the acting part yeah exactly and so but you but you knew at such a young age because you went to the fame school fame wait didn't aniston didn't anniston went there yeah yeah were you guys in the same class no no she graduated a little bit before i did oh shit

Speaker 1 we will cut that out we will cut that out

Speaker 1 we're gonna fucking loop it and we're gonna send it to jen

Speaker 1 immediately it's just these are just the facts this is not you know it's not i mean nobody looks better than jennifer aniston that's a fact that is that's a fact that is so you know so wait sarah so so you're so your but your sister's a casting director you're an actress brothers and sisters i have another sister my dad remarried i have a half sister named rachel we don't know what she does okay but watching teaches acting classes that she i mean i'm literally is this true we can cut the whole episode okay sarah wait wait wait wait wait i mean everybody's involved everybody so come on everyone gets moved to L.A.

Speaker 2 And then my sister. So here's the truth.
And everybody has this in a family, I think, to some degree. I mean, I don't know what your stories are.
And frankly, I don't care, but

Speaker 1 my family's normal. But I'm just saying,

Speaker 2 I wanted to be an actress from the time I feel like when I was in utero. Like, it feels like I came out of the womb wanting to do this.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 2 My siblings, I think, had more.

Speaker 2 I think less of a clear idea about what that particular passion was and are probably better at a lot of things, whereas I have one thing that I can do you know whereas my sister's great at math and all this other shit that I can't do you know right right right but I mean I don't think it's that strange is it or maybe it is like are all of your siblings like none not what I have five there I have three other brothers and a sister but did they all know what they wanted to be whatever it was

Speaker 1 they have

Speaker 1 had a yeah my sister did a little bit she knew she wanted to be a cop she was are you kidding your sister's a cop yeah she was a cop yeah well she was not anymore she'll kick your ass she was kick your ass yeah she By the way, Sean's sister yesterday, I got a, I want to say this to Tracy.

Speaker 1 Tracy lives in Wisconsin. Tracy, listen up.
A beautiful, red, beautiful, red, beautiful

Speaker 1 Wisconsin Badger's golf shirt. Yeah.
Which was very generous

Speaker 1 with a beautiful note

Speaker 1 that was so nice. And I was thinking about that.
She's a very nice person. She's very thoughtful.
She's awesome.

Speaker 1 Why she deserves what you're saying

Speaker 1 behind the scenes always.

Speaker 1 And she clearly got her wrong.

Speaker 1 She's wrong. Tracy is a wonderful person.
Anyway,

Speaker 1 you should give her another shot, Sean.

Speaker 1 So, and by the way, Sarah, do you play golf? If you play golf, I'll have my sister send you a shirt. I don't.
I don't want to. Okay, great.

Speaker 2 Moving on. I still want the shirt.
Is that that?

Speaker 1 Yeah, no, for that's okay. I still want the shirt.
I sleep in it. Okay, great.

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Speaker 4 The family that vacations together stays together. At least, that was the plan.
Except now, the dastardly desk clerk is saying he can't confirm your connecting rooms.

Speaker 1 Wait, what?

Speaker 2 That's right, ma'am. You have rooms 201 and 709.
No, we cannot be five floors away from our kids. The doors have double locks.

Speaker 1 They'll be fine.

Speaker 4 When you want connecting rooms confirmed before you arrive, it matters where you stay.

Speaker 1 Welcome to Hilton.

Speaker 2 I see your connecting rooms are already confirmed.

Speaker 4 Hilton, for this day.

Speaker 1 So, wait, I want to know about

Speaker 1 Holland, the love of your life. Well, it's

Speaker 1 just north of Belgium, just south of Denmark,

Speaker 1 considered part of the Benelux countries.

Speaker 1 I want to know the fun story because I know a little bit of it, but you were at a dinner party and you hoped she wouldn't be sat next to you or something.

Speaker 2 Yeah, you know, she, I went to this dinner party that a friend of mine hosted where it was really kind of for Buck Henry who was there. And it was a, wow, yeah, it was a wild night.

Speaker 2 And I was at this dinner. It was a long, long table.
And there was one empty seat. And Holland Taylor comes sort of, you know,

Speaker 2 bustling in and her hair just like throwing her hair back and just, oh God, sorry, I'm late, which, you know, late people, when they're really that late it does end up making it sort of all about them when they arrive you know so she was really doing a like kind of grand oh so sorry i'm late at all we all and i looked up and i thought that is really a very beautiful person and i found her to be intimidating she's really smart and has a kind of formidable presence

Speaker 2 yeah and it's incredibly talented and i just i was i was young at the time guys i was 35

Speaker 1 wow 36. Wow.

Speaker 2 And she sat down next to me and I thought, oh, God.

Speaker 2 And then, you know, we just chatted a little while and then really never saw each other again, except for on the back lot where I was doing Studio 60 at Warner Brothers and she was shooting two and a half men.

Speaker 2 And she rolled her window down and said, hey, Blondie, do you need a ride?

Speaker 1 That's what she said to me. Wow,

Speaker 2 right. And I was like, oh,

Speaker 1 I'm okay.

Speaker 2 I can walk to stage 19 myself. And we never saw each other again.
And then we ended up doing a little, a little PSA for Martha Plimpton's

Speaker 2 abortion.

Speaker 2 This is not going well, guys.

Speaker 1 This is not going well. By the way, like I said, by the way, I know this is the story about how you and Holland got together.
Yeah. For me, it's the details of it are the fucking meat.

Speaker 1 They're really the meat of it. Because the Buck Henry

Speaker 1 and the Martha Plimpton,

Speaker 1 are you? This is like the fucking Olympics to me. This is incredible.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 She has an organization called A is For, which is an abortion reproductive rights organization. And she asked us to do this PSA.
So Holland and I happened to arrive on the same day.

Speaker 2 Holland was getting ready to come to New York to do her production of Anne, which she wrote that was going to be done at Lincoln Center about Governor Ann Richards.

Speaker 1 It was a wonderful thing. Oh, that was the prequel to Annie, does it not? Yeah.

Speaker 2 Well, it was probably Annie, like when Annie, like,

Speaker 1 is finally

Speaker 1 a grown-up. She grows up, right? She grows up to be governor of Texas.
It was a really hard knock life before that. Yeah, exactly.

Speaker 2 Hard knock life.

Speaker 2 Yeah. And

Speaker 2 we saw each other there and then we followed each other on Twitter. And I literally DM'd her when I was shooting in New Orleans.
Yeah. I slid into Holland Taylor's DMs.

Speaker 1 Wow.

Speaker 2 Wow, look at that. And then I sent a picture of her to a friend of mine and I was like, can I date a 70-year-old woman?

Speaker 1 Right.

Speaker 2 And my friend was like, absolutely not. And I'm just kidding.
She was like, yes, you can. She was like, fuck no.
Are you insane?

Speaker 2 And I was like, I think I'm going to do it. I think I'm going to fucking do it.

Speaker 1 Why not?

Speaker 2 And so I told you that you guys have known me.

Speaker 1 I've been in the rest of this history almost 10 years, not over 19 years.

Speaker 1 That's amazing. That's

Speaker 1 19 years. No, nine years.

Speaker 2 I'm 66.

Speaker 1 Okay, I don't know.

Speaker 1 And she's 110. She's 110.
She's 16.

Speaker 1 I love being around you guys, too. You can just tell how comfy you guys are with each other.
They're easy. They're one plus one making three.

Speaker 1 It's just you're both individuals, but you got the overlap.

Speaker 2 Yeah, we don't live together. That's the sort of secret.

Speaker 1 You know,

Speaker 1 Sean's married to a man. I do know.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Sure is.
They don't sleep together either. No, we don't.

Speaker 2 Holland and I, we spend plenty of time together, but we don't live in the same house.

Speaker 1 No, talk to me a little bit about that.

Speaker 1 Tell me about that a little bit. And again, okay, this is, I'm divulging too much, but I said to Alessandra recently, who also you'd like her, she has a lot of great tattoos.
Yeah. And we started.

Speaker 1 She's a separate. No, no, no.
No, no, no, on her arm. She does have one in the back of her neck.
And I said to her recently, we started talking about the idea of separate beds. Jesus Christ.

Speaker 1 And somebody wrote this, not in the same room. Somebody wrote this thing.
She sent it to, she sent me this article because I kind of joked about it. Yeah.
Because sleep is so important.

Speaker 1 We're big sleepers. We're 915 in bedders.
And so. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And

Speaker 1 that's why I am 65. And that's why I look so incredible.
Go ahead. Look at all that.
And I'm taking the words out of it.

Speaker 1 I feel like I'm cutting you off. No, you're about 65.
No, she didn't say okay.

Speaker 1 Okay, nope.

Speaker 1 But

Speaker 1 sleeping hookers. keeps you young.

Speaker 1 No, but we started talking about this idea, and so then we made a joke, and we're not going to do it, but this joke about like living separately, living in another house, there is a certain wisdom to it on some levels, right?

Speaker 2 I mean, we've been together for a long time now, and I think part of it has to do with we're together when we want to be, and we're not when we don't.

Speaker 1 But couldn't you, but instead of just challenging it,

Speaker 1 instead of living in separate dwellings, what about just living together, but then sleeping in separate rooms?

Speaker 2 No, because my favorite thing to do, we fall asleep holding hands, Holland and I. We sleep holding hands.

Speaker 2 We're very,

Speaker 2 I don't, I like to sleep near her. I don't want to be around her the rest of the time.

Speaker 1 Just kidding.

Speaker 1 Sure.

Speaker 1 You know what I mean?

Speaker 2 It's the daylight hours where I'm like, you can go.

Speaker 1 But

Speaker 2 no, I mean, I think we both, you know, Holland before me had not been in a ton of long-term relationships, whereas Holland is my sort of third, you know, more than five-year relationship.

Speaker 2 So, so I tend to do that and have more experience doing that. Holland has it.
And so, her life and to get to be her age and sort of not

Speaker 2 having really cohabitated with someone for a long time, I think it was a lot to sort of all of a sudden have me and all my meanness.

Speaker 1 in her space. But if you live separate days, you've got something to talk about.
Right. Where in in Canada are you from? If you live separate days.

Speaker 1 I think that, you know, like I spend a bunch of time away as you guys do as well when you're working.

Speaker 1 And it's kind of, it's nice to be able to fill your partner in on that which they have not experienced with you. It gives you something to fucking talk about.

Speaker 2 I thought you were going to go somewhere else with that. But yeah.

Speaker 1 Honestly, it's one of my favorite things is to come home after a long time and fill my partner in.

Speaker 2 I was going to make the same joke. And I just want you to know that that was the joke I was going to make.

Speaker 2 And I appreciate you, Will, and I appreciate that i'm not the only one with the mind of the size of a tiny pee no what i what i

Speaker 1 now sean i will recommend to you something that amanda and i uh do is that we do share the same

Speaker 1 we do share the same bed but we have two different duvets therefore when she rolls over or i roll over where there's not a duvet drag that wakes up the other person

Speaker 1 yeah that's great but but but my but jay my thing is snoring because do you snore or scotty He could bring down a building. Right.
And I

Speaker 1 do what Amanda does. You just slide your hand underneath the shoulder just a little bit, create a little bit of a wedge, and they roll over.

Speaker 1 You get the guy on his stomach, and he's not going to snore.

Speaker 2 What about earplugs?

Speaker 1 Nobody gets a guy on his stomach like JB.

Speaker 1 Hey, hey, guys. Hey, you know what?

Speaker 1 You know what? The snoring is a real thing. And does Scotty have a CPAP machine? Does he? No, he's going to get it like the newest, the greatest, latest.
He's going to try it.

Speaker 1 But he also has what we call the pot of life on his arm because of diabetes.

Speaker 1 So, what, that means he can't roll over? Well, then he's like, it's on his shoulder. So, then he's like, Hey, do they not have lemon laws in California?

Speaker 1 You still got the receipt on that guy, right? Fuck, man.

Speaker 1 That's really funny.

Speaker 1 That's so funny. Anything else on the list, Sean? Anything you got in my career on the camera? Well, let me check in with Will.
Will, can I move on to the career or no?

Speaker 1 Hey, wait, Sarah's not done alienating more people in her personal life.

Speaker 1 You've got a minute, 20 seconds left to ask a fucking question. I got...
Wait. No, we're just getting started, Sarah.
This is.

Speaker 1 I'm here all day, right?

Speaker 2 Like, I've got a ration of food here.

Speaker 1 We're about a double book.

Speaker 1 If this interview is over, I'm FaceTiming you because this cannot end.

Speaker 1 Wait, I want to know, like, I was going to go through all your stage stuff. Like, you did the Glass Menagerie opposite Jessica Lang.

Speaker 1 You were in a show with jessica lang that's so amazing and did right ryan murphy see that and that's how he cast you in american horror story or did he see you some in something else yeah what's going on with you and ryan what kind of what kind of stuff do you have on him and will we ever see

Speaker 1 i got i got i got nothing on ryan ryan's an open book man you everything i got on ryan you know about ryan you know you know i've never met him i'd like to you've never met him no i don't think i have either i met him maybe you're keeping him all to yourself why don't you share him with us for christ's sake

Speaker 2 i share him but i love him he's you know, he's been very, very good to me.

Speaker 2 Like the first person in my working life I felt who

Speaker 2 really

Speaker 2 saw me, you know, like he continued to say, I'm not, I don't know why I always use sports analogies and analogies when I don't watch any sports, but he continually threw me the ball, just always, and thought I could do things I didn't even know I could do.

Speaker 2 And so for me, he's just an absolute hero in my life, both as a friend and a professional.

Speaker 1 And you, and so you really felt seen. I really felt seen well.
yeah

Speaker 1 did you feel

Speaker 1 but then like nicole wallace and game change yeah it was about the mcc

Speaker 1 phenomenal absolutely incredible in that wait nicole wallace for i played nicole wallace before nicole wallace like was the msnbc yeah she's my

Speaker 1 hero yeah i played you gotta see you gotta see sarah player she's an unbelievable performance incredible

Speaker 2 it was when julianne moore played played sarah palin this was that hbo thing where ed harris played mccain and julianne moore played uh you literally play nicole Wallace I did no way did you ever meet her oh yeah oh yeah no way I'm I'm such a big fan of hers I watch her every single day it was a very very traumatic thing that happened I mean you should watch the movie you should watch Sean's right you should watch the movie

Speaker 1 what's it called game change okay

Speaker 2 she was really traumatized by the whole thing the Sarah Palin thing it was really yeah I'll bet yeah yeah

Speaker 1 so much so that she didn't vote for her own candidate she didn't vote for John she couldn't vote because of it wow it was really wild and then when you played when you played Marcia Clark, phenomenal and the O.J.

Speaker 1 Simpsons thing. You know, actually, I've got a couple of notes on that one.

Speaker 2 You got a couple of notes. You got a couple of notes on that one.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Are you guys locked on that? Because if so, I won't give you the notes.
Okay.

Speaker 2 You should probably not because it's already.

Speaker 1 I think I can safely say you've never sucked. Ever.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Never been bad.

Speaker 2 I got a couple of things in my closet that I think you'd be like,

Speaker 2 this wasn't

Speaker 1 the three-quarter-inch tape, right?

Speaker 1 Not even in the days of the. DHS.
DHS.

Speaker 1 Fucking guys, can I just get a little bit of credit? You got to go? No, I didn't jump in when I was teed up with Sucton in the closet, and I didn't see it. Yeah, I went right past you.

Speaker 1 I didn't either tease you off. I think about it.
I was like, fucking

Speaker 1 shattier like a good fucking.

Speaker 1 Cheapy joke, you know, but you refrained. No, I didn't say anything.

Speaker 1 Sarah, I read that after the OJ thing,

Speaker 1 Marshall Clark, you couldn't watch yourself anymore. Is that true and why? Yeah.

Speaker 1 What?

Speaker 2 Yeah, I can't watch myself now. Well, I actually decided to,

Speaker 2 I think for me, the Marsha Clark thing was the first time I had done anything where I felt

Speaker 2 so much

Speaker 2 connectivity to Marsha, the person, and so much,

Speaker 2 it just was the first time there felt like a real creepy, actressy kind of melding of like, almost like a visitation where you've been sort of embodied by a person you don't know.

Speaker 2 I mean, how it happened. I'm waiting for your joke, Will, about being embodied by you don't got one? Okay.

Speaker 1 He's writing it. Just be patient.

Speaker 1 He'll get there. He'll get there.

Speaker 2 That's okay. It's just an opportunity missed.
It's not a big deal. But

Speaker 2 it was the most connected I ever felt to anything I'd ever done professionally. And I thought, if I watch this, and also it was in conjunction with the most celebrated I had ever been about my work.

Speaker 2 And so I think I thought, if I watch this, and everybody thinks it's great and I hate it, I'm going to sort of ruin my experience that I'm having that has never happened to me before of feeling really

Speaker 1 you know

Speaker 2 I understand you know what I mean like I just thought I'm gonna go in there with my hypercritical way and tear this apart and that would be a shame because this is the first time I feel like anyone is giving a shit about my work or what I'm doing and so I thought I should try to enjoy it and then I just kept it yeah you should check it out it's pretty fantastic all of it but and you should also remember that nobody's gonna be more critical about your work than Trisha Trisha Hawkins I'm surprised I haven't gotten an email from her like already everything that's ever come out I'm just shocked shocked.

Speaker 1 So is that still your policy is to not watch your work?

Speaker 2 Yes, except for when I have been EPing things, I do watch it, but I try to watch it in a kind of

Speaker 2 a way where, you know, because I'm giving notes.

Speaker 1 You're depriving yourself of incredible performances, but that's just me.

Speaker 1 And this, I have one last thing, and then we're all going to let you go. So Nicole Wallace, Marsha Clark, and then Linda Tripp, crazy transformation, incredible.

Speaker 1 You completely disappeared as Linda Tripp. That was, and so are you, I'm watching your career from outside going, oh, she's so phenomenal at playing as a character actress.

Speaker 1 Is that your go-to comfort zone?

Speaker 2 I feel like the vanity component of this industry, particularly for women, but for men, for all of us, like I feel so hyper-focused on this shit, the face and the body and the hair and the weight and the thing and the wrinkles and all this shit that I definitely feel a kind of freedom when I can hide behind these other things, whether it's Marsha's wig or Linda's, the prosthetics to play Linda.

Speaker 2 And

Speaker 2 I can hide.

Speaker 2 It's a way of hiding that I think ultimately.

Speaker 1 She died.

Speaker 2 She did die. She died right before we started.

Speaker 1 She was died. No way.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Wow.
Wait, Sarah, before we go, before we go, I just want to know, because you're a creature of the theater like I am. Super fast.
Funny, tragic theater story.

Speaker 1 Anything happens either in this play or something. Funny or tragic theater story.

Speaker 2 I mean, I don't know if there's a more tragic story than getting notes from an actress who played a play

Speaker 1 30 years ago, but

Speaker 2 funny that something happened the other. Well, two things happened recently, which is, you know, in the play, which you guys saw, we can discuss this later.

Speaker 2 In the first act of the play, I am having an argument with the black sheep of the family played by Michael Esper, who

Speaker 1 the great Michael Esper, who I think you heard. He's incredible, and he's a great choristal.

Speaker 2 And I leave the room in a big huff, and I'm very upset, and I've just blown up and screamed at everybody. And I leave the stage, I slam the door.
And his line is, what happened to her?

Speaker 2 And someone from the balcony went, you.

Speaker 1 It's a balcony for you. Yeah.

Speaker 2 And then the other thing that happened that was kind of cool the other day, which is I've never experienced that.

Speaker 2 And I don't know if you ever have either, Sean, but we had an actress get sick in act one and then the understudy went on for act two.

Speaker 1 That's never happened, but I've always had a lot of time. I've never heard that happen.

Speaker 2 It was like Days of Our Lives or something where like someone was decapitated in season four and in season 10 they came out with a

Speaker 1 announcement or you just did it. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Yeah, they make an announcement and everyone just clapped.

Speaker 2 And there's something very special about the theater where like people are willing to believe anything you do up there as long as you kind of commit to that world and you and you like a good pilot, let them know what the fuck is going on.

Speaker 2 Not to bring it full circle for you guys, but I got to say.

Speaker 1 That is incredible. It's a relationship between you and the audience.
It's a relationship.

Speaker 2 It's a relationship. You got to communicate.
It's the key to everything you want.

Speaker 1 Listen, lady, early congratulations on your Tony Award.

Speaker 1 exactly incredible performance we love you and thank you for showing

Speaker 2 up will i just met you but you're my favorite

Speaker 1 i feel like

Speaker 2 what an absolute what a delight sarah i've never been so delighted oh my god thank you and i really do want you to also at the tabasco theater uh sean you live on there i think have i told you this like backs first of all your poster is down in the room have you did you talk about this on the show at all about the elephant the the room under

Speaker 2 the elephant room under the tabasco theater there this did you talk about this in my board

Speaker 2 but there you say it but there is there i mean it's really cool there's an they call it the elephant room because houdini right used to have this massive room underneath the stage that could hold an elephant so because he was going to do a big trick where he was going to disappear and he raises the elephant from the thing so they call it the elephant and so that's down there and there's a big poster of sean down there you're calling me an elephant yeah well i'm just saying like there are a lot of posters that are not down there there's there's two posters down there and yours is one of them and also every night when i walk backstage to get to my entrance there is a corkboard on the right-hand side that the prop guys have up, and it just says Oscar Levant on it.

Speaker 2 So, I sort of think about you every day when I'm there.

Speaker 1 I love that, honey. That's very sweet.
Thank you. And I'm so glad you're there, and I'm so glad we saw it.
And I can't wait to root you on. You really

Speaker 1 appreciate it.

Speaker 2 You wrote me a lovely text. I didn't hear from you, Jason, but

Speaker 1 I'm confident I will. Sam, no, I will

Speaker 2 hear from you, Will, when you come backstage or when you don't. And then, yeah.

Speaker 1 I had a terrible joke, and I didn't say it. I just had another terrible one.
I saw your whole, I want it. Please give it out.

Speaker 1 And it's fucking killing me. And I said that Houdini was going to do the, he was going to do the trick with the elephant.
It was too long. So they asked him to truck in it.

Speaker 1 Asked him to truck. Fuck you guys.
Fuck you.

Speaker 1 Fuck you all. Look what you made me do.
Look at you. You did this.

Speaker 1 Looking shorts. Strangely, I have to go.
I mean, I just have to go now. You got to rest your voice.
I got to rest your mouth. We love you.
We love you. Sarah, love you.

Speaker 2 Thank you, guys. Bye, honey.

Speaker 1 Bye. Goodbye.
Goodbye.

Speaker 1 That was great.

Speaker 1 That'll start your week. Happy Monday, everybody.
You have great Sarah Paulson to give you a nice little jolt of

Speaker 1 love and energy. She is the best.
Is she something else? She's really funny.

Speaker 1 And by the way, and everything she's done, like you said, Jay, she doesn't, I know we say it a lot about a lot of people, but never

Speaker 1 terrible. Never terrible.
She's one of those people who's never, who's always good no matter what she does. Yeah, she's no matter what she's in.

Speaker 1 And she's also just like, just to be around is is uh as you can see it it just makes your day makes your night and you put her and amanda pete together a couple of best friends there yeah you know you're just you're you're

Speaker 1 flying for a week

Speaker 1 yeah it's like a you watch them it's like a ticket to a free show they just like go go go and it's fun really engaging and charming and yeah it's great well i i you know i i i said it already to her but i'm really excited about her and the award shows coming up for her in new york um i think she's gonna kill it and I'm so glad she was here.

Speaker 1 Oh, you're waiting for her back. Oh, sorry.
No, no, no, no, no.

Speaker 1 Because you were just a little bit more.

Speaker 1 You've got a head full of steam going towards the bye. And then it was just a fucking, and then it was just absolutely

Speaker 1 an elephant one. I don't know.

Speaker 1 I was like,

Speaker 1 let's see.

Speaker 1 Let's see. Let's see.
Let's see what he thinks.

Speaker 1 The Tony's Google. Trish.

Speaker 1 And then that one. let's see, Trish Monica

Speaker 1 Lewinsky. Nothing about the elephant, right? Okay, how about

Speaker 1 movies versus theater?

Speaker 1 She's with Ryan Murphy. Well, she's on New York, and she's in New York.
She's also in Los Angeles often, so maybe she's bicostal. We could use bicoastal.
Oh, yeah. We've done it again.

Speaker 1 We've done it a few times. We've done bicoastal quite a bit.

Speaker 1 We've done Biden. We've done a Biden.
Yeah, we've done a lot of people.

Speaker 1 We did

Speaker 1 take a bicycle. I know I know Apple in New York.
Okay, go ahead. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Hey, Sean. Hey.
So, what's up?

Speaker 1 Hey, Sean. Hey.

Speaker 1 You know, the theater, the Tabasco theater that she's in, is actually the Belasco. Yeah, the Velasco.
Sorry, the Velasco theater she's actually in

Speaker 1 isn't one of those big theaters, like where you

Speaker 1 can see everything in close. You don't need to sit in the back with one of those opera, you know, things.
Those, you know, what do they use to see real far in a theater? You can hold up

Speaker 1 like

Speaker 1 binoculars.

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