"Larry David"

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Subject to change. Hi, this is Larry David.
I've been asked to say that I'm going to be on the show later.

So I'm complying with that request.

Yeah, welcome to...

What is this? I don't even know what I'm on here.

What is this?

Smart.

Smart.

Smart.

Smart. Smart.
smart smart smart smart smart smart hi everybody Jason I love that you're still here in town I didn't know you're gonna be here in the middle of the day long I am working remotely this week yes from Los Angeles where it's got New York weather today it's nice and rainy I love I love it. It's a nice rain.
Warring rain. Do you guys like weather? Or do you love this Southern California 75 and Breezy? Hey, man, I'm not single, so I don't know where this is going.
Hey, guys, what's your favorite season? Hey, do you like weather? Come over here real quick. Can I talk to you for a second? Yeah, it's nice.
I prefer it. Well, it's very

Chicago-y. Yeah, but you would like

75 and Breezy 365 days

of the year?

No. Yeah, I don't like the heat, so that's

an issue. I don't mind it.

You wouldn't mind some snow and some rain, would you?

That's what I'm saying. I actually

enjoy this. I think I've told you this before.
I live in such

a snow, I grew up in such a snow,

snowy, well, not really that snowy,

but cold, to the extent that

this morning, dropping the kids to the bus, and it was raining and stuff, and I saw this one road. Isn't that great, Sean, how he just takes them just to the bus stop? Can't take them all the way to school, like some of us.
Well, I don't live in the valley, so, so anyway, I see, I see, I see a road that's going up off Beverly Glen, like really steep little side road. And I think my first, and I had this in my old house, like, boy, man, it's gonna be tough when it gets icy.
It doesn't get icy. No.
Oh, so your brain just immediately, huh. My old house, when I was gonna buy it, I thought like, fuck, how am I gonna get up this thing when it ices? And I'm like, oh, it doesn't get icy.
Never ices. Well, that's way sir go ahead sean you were gonna say something but you go you go well i was just gonna say because i realized as i'm talking i did one of those another mistake i got one of those emails and it had the thing there and had like reviews buried in the email i open it up and then it has like a couple about the podcast one of them was one star and it said does we'll only get one hour to speak a week Because he just wouldn't shut up.
And I'm like, I'm giving this guy satisfaction. But at the same time, I'm thinking like, it's free.
Right? Yeah. He didn't pay anything for it.
Right. Could turn it off.
Yeah. But he's implying that he would gladly pay a little bit to shut you up a lot.
I guess so. And or it made him so mad, this thing he's getting for free, that he went online and typed out a message, gave the podcast one star.
He's got time. But Willie, don't read.
You always read those. Well, I do it for you guys.
I'm out here. Thank you.
You want me on that wall. You know, you need me on that wall.
But it's a specific subset of our listeners that actually take the time to write something not so nice.

Yeah.

And like, is it a full representation of our audience?

I don't know.

I don't know.

It was very hostile towards me.

We take it under advisement, though.

Yeah, we take it under advisement.

So I'm going to shut up.

Well, don't do that.

No, don't do that.

Maybe what he's saying is he likes you at an eight, he'd love you at a five. No, no, no.
He wants me at a zero. I love that you're just like, then just don't listen.
I get it. I was chatting with Will very briefly this morning.
You guys talk before we talk? Not usually. Not usually.
You guys running over bits?

Yeah.

Okay, so listen.

So you set me up with saying something about Easter.

And Jay, I texted you a lot.

A lot.

I was like, I think I reached my text limit with Jason.

What, last night?

Last night or two nights ago.

Wait, let me look here.

I don't see any text from you.

Yeah, I was like.

I don't see any text from you. Oh, wait.

No, we were texting back and forth. Oh, about Scotty? Yeah, about Scotty, yeah.
No, that wasn't a lot. Yeah, I was like...
I didn't see any texts from you. Oh, wait.
No, we were texting back and forth. Oh, about Scotty?

Yeah, about Scotty.

Oh, that wasn't a lot.

Yeah. Did you hear about Scotty,

Sean? Or Will? No, what happened? Sorry.

Oh, yeah. It's not

working out. Scotty's out.

Scotty's out. Almost 18 years

I'm coming out here. Yeah.
Yeah. So,

Sean is

trying to figure out what to do with the weekend to take full advantage of it. Let's talk about the weather, Jason.
He's TechAvale LA. Yeah, he's just ordered a box of glow sticks from Amazon for the weekend.
No, I wanted to tell you. So I was eating breakfast.
I walked past the bathroom and this is the craziest thing. Scotty loves peanut butter.

Why is my sound going out?

Oh, can you hear?

There we go.

Okay, go ahead.

Hang on a second.

Sorry, let me remind you where you were.

So Scotty loves peanut butter.

Go ahead.

Right.

By the way,

do you think that this would fit

into the breaking news category?

Absolutely.

Did you guys find each other on the PB&J freak site? Well, that's fun because I love jelly. Where's your address? Why is that? It's not even that good.
It is. Could you imagine a PB&J?

I'd love to spread a little of you on me.

Like a food dating site.

We could make, the two of us together would make a great meal.

By the way, not supposed to be a dating site.

It's supposed to be just...

Just a culinary site.

Peanut butter appreciation site turned into a dating site.

They got married at the Jif headquarters. Okay, so here we go.
Here we go. Do you like Jif? This is funny, actually.
Do you like Jif? Scott? Oh, Sean? I'm in a Jif. I do like Jif.
Scotty loves peanut butter. I would love to see a taste test between Jif and Skippy.
Sorry, go ahead. Let's do it.
When his blood sugar is low, okay, because he's got diabetes, he'll go in the pantry and scoop out a spoonful of peanut butter.

And every time any one of us goes to get peanut butter,

Ricky, the dog, can smell it,

and he comes over there and sits there and he drools like crazy,

and there's like a puddle of his dog spit.

So it's cute and disgusting all at the same time.

And it's created a bad habit because we always cave in

and give him some peanut butter.

So now we have to find a way to sneak the peanut butter when the dog is sleeping in another room so this morning i walked by the bathroom near the kitchen and i'm like are you in there and scared he said yeah i'm eating peanut butter i said in the bathroom he said yeah it's the only way to avoid the dog boy i remember when yeah what no it's just when i was a kid that was the only place to get, and I would do different things in the bathroom than steak peanut butter. He really, truly brought the jar of peanut butter.
But you know what? Both you and Scotty have the same, you end up with the same result. Right? You both finish.
I thought that was odd and funny. Guys.
It was. It's definitely.
Here's somebody who's funny but not odd. Hmm how about that not great but go ahead he's a very talented pal uh of mine he's had more success than the three of us combined like many comedians he's got stand-up and saturday night live on his resume but before making his mark on the comedy zeitgeist of the last half century he he got his bachelor's degree in history, worked as a private chauffeur with a uniform and everything, and was selling bras at wholesale.
Things took a major turn for him in 1988 when he started to work on a little pilot called The Seinfeld Chronicles. It's my very hilarious friend, Larry David.
Larry David. Larry.
Oh, look at him. Oh, look at him.
He's already bored. He's already bored.
How about 15 minutes? I apologize. It definitely comes out of your time, so that's a good thing.
You're only going to be with us for another 45 minutes. But here's the sad part.
By the way, the dog thing, I love when the dogs are out of the house so I can have a meal.

That's what I'm saying.

And relax.

That's what I'm saying.

You can't eat with them.

That's what I'm saying.

That's your fault probably or Ashley's, right?

You fed them and now they don't forget that.

No, she started feeding them from the table.

It's all her fault.

I gave her a dirty look, but she did it. And now.
make her make her eat outside with the dogs i'll teach her and she'll never do it again i'm telling you i take snacks into my bathroom i do right because because of the dogs yeah because of the dogs that's what i'm saying so somebody yeah you can relate larry i'm so glad you're finally here did we just finally made your deal. It took so long.
I know. What do you mean? God, your business affairs was just, I guess, was your agent just beating us up? What are you involved in business affairs? We're not.
We're kidding. This is all free.
You're not getting paid for this. He was joking.
By the way, you know, I get that a lot. A lot of surprise.
Oh, sorry. It was humor? I really sneak up on folks.
Check your six. What the fuck? That's so good.
Can we talk about Sean's appearance on Curb this year? Wow, I was going to get there. I haven't seen it yet.
Has it been on? If we have to. All right, so speaking of making deals, you made a Sean Hayes deal and got him on the show.
Yeah. And? And? It's a long time coming.
Do you have notes? I have a time of my life. Be honest.
Larry, be honest. Yeah, be honest.
I'm going to be as honest as I can. Yeah.
He was fantastic. I don't know.
Really? I bet he was just fine. Listen, he was, no, fantastic.
Oh, thanks. He played a lawyer, and you believe this guy was a lawyer.
And he had to do a scene where he wakes up in the morning. It was like Gene Hackman from The French Connection.
Oh, boy. The acting display of him getting up in the morning.
Sure. The whole deal.
Yeah. I was like, my mouth dropped.
I was in love. It was incredible.
I added wiping my eyes just to make it real. Wiping your eyes.
It was real Gene Hackman. Did you start with a...
Yeah, a little bit. A little bit.
Which, Sean has the worst sleep hygiene, I imagine, of the four of us here. So that must have, you had to dig deep.

Did you study people sleeping?

How did you do it, Sean?

I watched hours of tape of just people sleeping.

People that weren't wearing the mask, right?

But that was one of the, I don't know.

Curb has been one of my favorite shows forever and ever.

And I loved being on it.

I was honored to be asked.

I was honored to do it with you and on the last season, nonetheless.

Yeah.

Will, did you ever get on that show?

No, I was never asked.

Thank you. loved being on it i was honored to be asked i was honored to do it with you and on the last season nonetheless yeah will did you ever get on that show no i was never asked yeah me neither boy not once larry said to me larry do you remember this like about a year ago i ran into and yeah he said he did and he goes how come you he goes how come you were never on curb i said first of all i said well, I said, well, because I think I'm too tall.
And then I said, it's your show. You never asked me.
That's why. It's the primary reason.
You know, it is true. Just about everybody in Hollywood has either been on that show or Law & Order.
And not us. Although, Willie, you've done a Law & Order.
I did Law & Order. But I would say this.
Now I take pride in the fact that I wasn't. Now it makes it more, I'm in a more exclusive club.
Yep, there you go. I'm like the Marty Scorsese of never winning the best Oscar for directing.
Yeah. With regards to.
Or Susan Lucci. Sure.
Well, it does sound like, I will say, it does sound like a really, from what I've heard from my friends that have been on the show, that it's like one of the greatest experiences.

It's like up there with, like, Saturday Night Live.

Like, it's just an incredible group, and you're improvising, and it's just—

I think it's the improvising.

Actors really love to improvise.

But I'll bet you've had some that have been like, forget it.

I will sink in that atmosphere.

Do not—I'm not coming on.

Yes, not many, but there have been a few who really couldn't. Had a tough time.
What do you do about those who say, oh, yeah, great. No, I love improvising.
And they come on and they're just horrendous. What do you do? How do you? Who has a conversation with them? You or the director? You mean somebody who we've asked to do it? To do it, and they clearly are way over their skis with improvisation.

Do you do a, okay, guys, let's take a quick five.

It's only happened a couple of times in the show

where people were trying to be funny.

Right, right.

And that's like the worst one you can do.

And that's a hard note to give. What does that sound like do you do you pull that aside don't i here's the note yeah don't try to be funny that's shit wow yeah don't do it one of your great cast members the fantastic the incredible vince vaughn who i just think the world of he gave me a great a great note once when I was trying to improvise during a job with him.

We've done a couple of movies together.

He was doing something genius.

And then I said something

and he just stopped.

He just looked at me and said,

do you think that's helping?

And I thought it was part of the dialogue, right?

The improv.

But it was out of character, yeah.

It was Vince saying to Jason, shut your mouth and let me do my thing. What a gut punch.
And it was a good note. What a gut punch.
But Larry, thanks for being here today. Hey, Larry.
Wait a second. Sean, do you have an agenda you're trying to get to? No, I just want to ask him a question.
I haven't even gotten to the point yet that I feel so... Slighted? ...bummed out out that I...
Yeah, because I would have loved that environment so much. Larry, it's not over yet.
It's not over. Larry, I'm going to fucking...
I mean, I've run into Larry on the golf course. I keep calling him Gary, that's why.
I run into him on the golf course. Maybe that had something to do with it.
I've run into Larry on the golf course before, and I've never been able to say it, except for the one time when he asked me where I haven't been on. I was like, man, I really wish.
And it is one of my true regrets. I was like, that's an environment I feel like I would have really liked because I like to fuck around.
But anyway, so Larry, welcome to the podcast. Welcome to our show.
How do you feel? Scale of one to ten, how do you feel today about being here right now? Before I ever do anything at any show ever, I always regret that I said yes. Yes.
And I feel that way today. Of course.
We're going to get you to the other side of that by the time we're done. Okay, I hope so.
Or not. But are you good about saying no or are are you terrible do you say yes because you don't want to you don't want to displease people no i'm i'm i'm good about saying no yeah good that's a great quality that's good i mean what will we had a friend who told us once look if you don't want to do it tomorrow right if someone says yeah yeah in a few months you know and you're like sure yeah no the better thing if you don't want to do it tomorrow say no today yeah yeah you know even if it's a couple months in the future.
and you're like, sure, yeah. The better thing, if you don't want to do it tomorrow, say no today.

Yeah. You know, even if it's a couple

months in the future. Larry, let's, can we

go back, Sean? Can I grab the reins

here for a second? Sure, sure, yeah. I'm going to ask you.

I kind of want to, I know that you

were a stand-up back in New York.

You started sort of as a stand-up,

right? And I know this from, I got

kind of a history of you through our mutual

friend, Jim Valli, the great Jim Valli.

The great Jim Valli.

He lived in my building. And he lived in your building.

I'm not sure. And I know this from, I got kind of a history of you through our mutual friend, Jim Valley, the great Jim Valley, who I adore.
He lived in my building. And he lived in your building.
In New York. I remember him telling you stories.
And when Tannis' daughter was little and he, and Jim was kind of a stay-at-home dad in a lot of ways, right? Yeah. And he would talk about you living in the building at Manhattan Plaza, right? Right.
What was that like being a stand--up back then? What was your kind of, what were your ambitions when you were doing that back in those days, living in Manhattan Plaza and being a, did you want to be the world's greatest stand-up? I did want to, I wanted to be a great stand-up. Yeah.
I wasn't, but I wanted to be one. Yeah.
And would have settled if you had told me in 1987 and you offered me $200 a week to do stand-up in New York at the clubs, $200 a week for the rest of your life have i would have taken it wow boy wow i was we have an offer for you i had no i had no hopes to do uh anything well but what about but you said sean said in the intro that you studied uh history uh to be a professor no No, no, just to get out of college. And that was world history or American history? Both.
Will loves himself some world history. I took history.
I dropped out of college, but I was a history major and I love history. I read mainly.
Yeah, I had no, I wasn't interested in show business. Right.
Really? Yeah. But dad, parents, Jewish, by the way, both sides or just your father? It's a both, yeah.
It's both. And grew up in that.
You sound so disappointed. I know.
You know, if you would have split it up, I don't think it would have been the worst thing in the world. If you would have given me a half and half, I admire the halves.
Sometimes somebody will tell me he's a half and I'll go, oh, that's great. That's great.
So were either one of them particularly funny or funny enough for you to feel like, oh, maybe I'll be a stand-up. I got it kind of in my jeans.
No. No.
No.

My mother was funny without trying to be funny,

without realizing she was being funny.

Right. She had a kind of a Gracie

Allen quality about her. In fact,

my friends called my mother Gracie.

But it wasn't purposeful.

Right.

She wasn't cracking wise.

Right.

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Our show is sponsored by BetterHelp. Hey guys, everybody should have a support system, right? Who's your support system? My support system, as you well know, talk about all the time is Scottyty.
And of course, my two besties, Will and Jason. Whenever I have a problem, an issue, I talk to them about it.
And if they're not available, I will talk to a therapist. And I've been going to therapy for a long time.
And it's always great. So think about your favorite leaders, mentors, and idols.
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While Hilton is always expected to have top-notch service, you'd be surprised at the unexpected places they're offering it now. They've partnered with AutoCamp, which offers insanely cool airstreams in iconic outdoor destinations.
Hilton also has an exclusive partnership with small luxury hotels of the world, providing Hilton Honors members access to luxury boutique hotels across the globe. And they've added romantic and refined nomad hotels and graduate hotels in your favorite college towns to their portfolio.
Explore all the new ways to stay with those Hilton honors points you've been saving at Hilton.com. Hilton for the stay.
And now back to the show. After college, you were in the Army Reserve? Yeah, because Vietnam was going on.
I didn't want to go, you know, I didn't want to go, and I signed up for the reserves. And so...
And never got drafted? No, I never got drafted. But I got out of the reserves after two years with a psychiatric discharge.
Oh, Larry. Let's hear more about that.
Yeah. Oh, I told this, I think, on Howard Stern.
It's kind of a long story, but should I make a long story short? No, you can, we have 45 minutes. You've got a completely different audience.
Yeah. If you're smart, this is the last answer you'll give.
So good. Work the clock, Larry.
Yeah. Tell it.
And by the way, just make it up anyway. We're not going to check.
No, I was in the Army, the Reserves. I went to basic training.
It was horrendous. It was the worst experience of my life.

I was, you know, ducking under live ammunition and firing weapons.

Jumping over walls.

And I had bayonets.

And so I did that for eight weeks.

And then I had occupational specialty school.

I was a petroleum storage specialist.

What?

And then we had to, yeah, well, you have to fill up the tanks with gas. Sure, sure.
Somebody has to do it. So then after I got out, I had to go to meetings once a month at Floyd Bennett Field, a big airplane hangar, and it was freezing.
And I had to go home, and I stayed at my apartment,

at my parents' apartment in Brooklyn.

I stayed with them for Saturday, Friday night and Saturday night,

and then I'd go home and back to New York on Sunday.

But the meetings were Saturday and Sunday, and then I heard about a psychiatrist who was writing letters to get people out.

Sure. So I borrowed $250 dollars i went to see the psychiatrist i convinced him that i was insane he wrote me a letter saying i was insane you gotta stop there how do you convince him you're insane what was your what was your flavor my flavor was i wanted to kill myself okay so you went in there and there and you really tried to be convincingly...
Yeah, I had suicidal ruminations. What was it you were trying to get rid of? What were you trying to avoid? Life was just too hard.
Were you able to make yourself cry? I was able to act. I was able to act.
Yeah. You can see it on Max right now.
I think I could have fooled. I don't know if I fooled him.
Right. Because everybody was acting for him.
But when I went to the meeting armed with the letter. Sure.
Now I'm really acting insane. Yeah.
Right. And these people who knew me for two years, because I went off into the corner, I was huddled by myself, I was looking around, acting crazy.
Rocking back and forth a little bit. Good, good.
Still rolling. Where's the major? Where's the major? I need to talk to the major.
Where's the major? And so somebody, and I saw people pointing at me,

talking about me.

I know they were.

Because you're nuts.

Like what was going on with me?

And then I went to see the major,

and I gave him the letter, and he read the letter,

and I'm sitting across from him acting as nutty as a fruitcake.

And. You should have chewed off a corner of the letter and I'm sitting across from him acting as nutty as a fruitcake and You should have chewed off a corner

of the letter.

Well, he had the letter. He read

the letter. He asked me a couple of questions

after the letter.

And then he said to me,

can you drive home?

Yeah, perfect.

You knew you'd done it.

I said, oh yeah, yeah. I'm a good driver.
I'm a good driver. Perfect.
You knew you'd done it. I knew I had him.
I said, oh, yeah, yeah, I'm a good driver. I'm a good driver.
Wow. That's crazy.
Wow. Now, you're not old enough to go to Vietnam.
I tell you what, we could have used some of that kind of ingenuity in Vietnam. Now, I'm just saying, we could have used people who thought out.
Yeah, the country could have used it, Larry. I'm sure I could have made a contribution in some way yeah but look at the contribution you ended up making here you know wonderful larry but larry now that you're on now that you're here on this little smart list thing and we didn't get a chance to really go deep on the set when i was working with you on curb like i always want to ask you i wanted to ask you the questions um those days that we worked together, but I was too embarrassed.
Like, I know you're probably sick of talking about it, but Seinfeld, how, I've always wondered, how did you and Jerry even meet? And how did that happen? Because when you make a TV show, it's so rare that the talent and the writers or the showrunners, that everything kind of hooks up and everybody has the same sensibility. And it seems you and Jerry had the same sensibility.
So did you know each other out or was that like a business set up meeting or something? We were both comedians in New York. So you knew each other.
So we knew each other in New York. He generally performed at the comic strip.
I was at the improv. But we would see each other a lot.

We always enjoyed each other's company. We would actually go and write together in the afternoon.
He'd bring his premises. I'd bring my premises.
And we'd go over them. And I had written a screenplay that somehow he had read.
and then when NBC approached him about doing a show,

he came to me and asked if I'd be interested in working with it. Had you written like a half-hour script before? No.
No. That's why it's so damn good.
It's just so different in form. But did you, so when you get into that sort of running that half hour multi-cam uh format wait a second wait a second i did write one half hour i did write a half hour pilot for gilbert gottfried no kidding um yeah that was filmed and they didn't pick it up that was for hbo was it it also sort of changing the format a bit? No? Yeah.
Yeah. Right.
Yeah, they didn't like it. But I love that my Seinfeld...
Sorry, Willie. Well, I was just going to say, so I kind of want to get into this half-hour format.
So you do multicam, but the way that you do Seinfeld, it's not like traditional multicam because you have, well, at least initially, you kind of would go back and forth to Jerry doing his stand-up, and then you guys kind of fine-tuned that as you went is my recollection, I get it. Right.
But then... The premise of the show initially was how does a comedian get his material?

Right.

So we would go through an episode,

and you would see whatever happened to him on the show,

he would turn into material.

Yeah. That was like the idea.

And then it went like after the first year,

you guys tossed that, right?

I don't think after the first year.

I think it was a couple of years.

And then you just kind of moved it to the end.

Yeah, right. But did you, again, I don't want to get too into the weeds on the format.
No, go in the weeds. We're already in the weeds.
Did you enjoy, did you, I don't know, was it difficult for you writing in that format? Was it a format that you liked or that you had to get used to or that you rebelled against? No, I was okay with it. I didn't mind it at all.
At one point, I said to him, I can't believe they're letting us do this. I was really surprised.
Really? Yeah, I felt like, how are we getting away with this? Did you have a staff that you handpicked, or did they try to marry you with a bunch of more traditional writers? How did that all work out? Well, for the first four shows, I wasn't the executive producer. Yeah.
They brought in someone who had experience. Sure.
And who had a show on the air previously, and they brought him in, and he was my boss. Right.
Yeah. And so we handed in the first couple of shows.

Yeah.

And then we were called into his office for notes. Wow.
And he just was just four episodes. That note meeting, it did not go well.
I just generally probably wanted to make it something a bit less specific. Esoteric, probably.
Less esoteric or? I don't know. You know, when...
They were probably going for something more traditional, something more familiar, recognizable, because you're on a major network and let's round the edges a bit. Yes.
And you guys thankfully said, well, but because you guys famously did not start high up in the ratings. You probably figured, what? Give us a chance to grow and do our own thing.
I said no to everything he said. Yeah.
Right. I said, I'm not going to, I can't do that.
And then I, you know, I was, and then I quit and they said, and then Jerry went to Castle Rock and said, look, forget it. We're going to do this or not.
And so then that was, that guy didn't really participate after that. Yeah.
And it was essentially my show after that. Yeah.
Larry, and it should be noted, and I was a fan of Jerry's. I saw him when I was like 17.
My buddies got me for my birthday to go see Jerry play in Toronto in a theater. Oh, no? Yeah.
And I was a really big fan of his stand-up. And so when you guys started the show, I watched the first season.
I had new york um it was the fall of 90 right when you guys came on the air um i think that's right or summer maybe the summer summer of 90 yeah summer the pilot came on in the summer of 89 and then the first four shows came on in june of 90. yeah and so crazy and and it was the seinfeld chronicles as everybody knows, yeah the first the season yeah first season and or just the pilot i think i think it was just the pilot oh was it i don't remember yeah and i and i seem to remember i think we talked about this maybe when jerry was on that um that the budget for the show at nbc came out of late night, right? Yeah.
Initially, it was Rick Ludwin who... I think Variety.
Oh, Variety. Variety, yeah.
And right, was it... Rick Ludwin.
Yeah, one of the greats. He championed the show.
Great dude. The show wouldn't have gotten on the air if not for him.
I love that. By the way, while you were on Seinfeld, you had both your daughters? Or just one daughter? No, both.
Wow. And did you bring them around? Were they interested? No, they were babies.
No, I know, but when they got older. When they got older, it was off the air.
First of all, don't... Sean, you stupid.
Sean, you fucking. I thought they were like.
Sean, take a time out. Real quick.
Did the show do well with babies? Sean, the show went off in 98. My daughter, Cassie, was born in 94.
Oh, okay. And Romy was born in 96.
First of all, calm down. Second of all.
Larry, how did you guys do with toddlers? Did you guys get a lot of toddlers? Oh, yeah. But Larry, Curb, correct me, has been on longer than Seinfeld was? Curb has been on for 24 years.
24 years. Isn't that amazing? Not consecutively.
No, not consecutively. You took like 10 years off.
But when we started, we started. Holy shit.
Wait, i want to go into curb more because like how did you come up with the like being uh being there i was like oh this is how this works you get like a little outline for my sister tracy who doesn't understand it's not written like say seinfeld was it was it's all improvised like we were talking at the beginning of this episode that um but how did you store a story outline, yeah. So you have to hit those points.
But it's so fun because you spend an hour just improvising one scene and then you cut out the fat in the editing room and you have all great stuff. It's such a great format.
So who thought of that and why did you think of that? I heard once, because when you and I did the Three Stooges, you said to me, I hate memorizing lines. Yeah.
Well, it was Seinfeld had ended, and I was thinking about what I was going to do next. And Jeff Garland had an office at Castle Rock, and Jeff Garland had an office next door.
And he said to me, what are you going to do now? I said, I'm thinking about going back to stand-up. And he said, well, you should film it.
And then I thought about, oh, well, what is that going to be? Filming it, that sounds intrusive. I don't know.
What are they going to do? The camera's going to follow me into a dry cleaner. I could understand.
I could see how it's going to be on stage. That could be somewhat interesting to see the growth of the act from beginning to end.
But offstage, I didn't like the idea of filming myself. The camera's following me around.
I didn't feel I'm all that interesting to follow. And so I thought maybe if I wrote some fictitious stories, that we could do that around the stand-up.
The stand-up could be real, but the off-stage stuff would be just stuff I made up. And so that's what I did.
I wrote an outline. I made Jeff my manager.
Cheryl auditioned. She was my wife.
We had kids in the first special, because that's what it was. It was a special.
It wasn't a pilot. Yeah.
It was just a one-off special. Right.
We got it. And did you get it? Or should I repeat it one more time? I just can't wait to hear what happened to the kids.
Well, I didn't really want to see the kids, I realized, after the special. Sure.
How did you off the children? I just pretended the first show never existed. Never happened.
That's the best way to do it. I love shit like that.
Never came back. Never.
You never need to fucking explain it. No, no, no.
You don't need to explain everything, right? I love that. Just fucking changed it.
I didn't want kids in the show. No.
Who does? The show would be so much funnier without kids. I didn't want to deal with kids.
I didn't want to keep having to explain, what about the kids? Where are the kids? Are the kids okay? Who's watching the kids? I didn't want to have to keep justifying everything that was going on and having to explain where the kids were. Kids aren't funny.
Kids aren't funny. Hey, the other thing is, Larry, do you think, God, you did something really genius,

which is you were able to play this version of yourself,

if you will, and you get to sort of be cranky

and say whatever you want.

And has it, it must have, God, I'm so envious,

it just bled into your real life that you're able to now,

because people just buy it and they're like,

well, it's just Larry being Larry.

He's like from the show.

And now you can just, you can go to a gas station

and give a guy the finger and like people will laugh. See you later.
Or scream at the slow group in front of you. You can do whatever the fuck you want on this planet.
What the fuck are you doing up there? I don't know about the planet, but like the west side of LA in Manhattan, you could do whatever the fuck you want. It's true.
It's made my life. It's made my fucking christ now i'm jealous i'm really getting heated now when i realized this fucking cart you literally wrote printed yourself a carte blanche yeah to say whatever the fuck you want in the places that we that we and people people are disappointed if i'm not that way i know people are like fuck the guy paid his bill and he didn't tell me to go fuck myself.
I mean, what am I doing wrong? He must hate me. You're making the people happy by you being cranky.
It's so great. Yeah.
Now, but do you notice that honestly that you get some stuff out there as this sort of this other version of yourself and then your real life actually ends up being a little bit more placid and less dramatic? I haven't noticed that, but it is acting and doing that Larry David on the show. Yeah.
It is so much fun, first of all, and kind of a little cathartic in a way. I know what you mean.
A little cathartic in a way way to couch it i mean when you're talking obviously it's the greatest greatest you get to say all these horrible things by the way how about um i wasn't even gonna bring this up but it just hit me marjorie taylor green first of all she said she was watching curb your enthusiasm kind of, oh, you watch the show. And then she got upset because she thought you painted people in her state or in the South as racist or whatever.
I'm paraphrasing, so I don't know her words. But weren't you kind of blown away that she even watches your show? I was pretty surprised by it.
Yeah. But it was just about a law that exists in that state.
Right, exactly. Where you can't give people water or food or when they're in line voting.
Yeah, or when you're in line voting. It's outrageous.
It's so unbelievable. It's so stupid.
It's so great. Yeah, I remember when I heard about that law, I wrote it down in my notebook.
And then I knew I was going to, you had to use that. The whole season is like kind of around that, isn't it? Yeah.
Yeah, it's great. So then, Larry, so the show has this incredible, long, successful run.
You've brought it to this beautiful conclusion. I'm not going to ask you, you know, what's next, but I would imagine

that you're good, right? You've worked your nards off for however many years at a really high level, accomplished probably 10 times what you thought you would accomplish. You feel satisfied.
are there areas in your life that you would love to try to find equal success in or other areas of the business or different industries no you're good you're all set any other industries you want to get into I'd love to be I'd love to be an offensive coordinator sure for an NFL. Okay.
That would be my dream job. Very offensive coordinator.
But truly, you do love football, and specifically, do you know about plays and all that stuff? No, I don't know anything about it, but I feel like I'd be good at it. Yeah, I know nothing.
But I feel like if I studied it,

if somebody took me under their wing,

I feel like in a year or two,

I could design,

I feel I could design great plays.

It's a creative endeavor, really,

when you think about it.

From what I understand,

if you just play Madden,

you really learn quite a bit.

So maybe try that.

Get yourself a PlayStation.

Oh, no, I've never done that.

Could you imagine Larry David on the field just calling shots?

Yeah.

Throwing his headset?

With the little headset, screaming into that thing?

I honestly feel I could do it.

You'd just be yelling, like, just throw it and then catch it.

How hard is it?

What team would that be?

Would that be the Giants or the Jets?

Well, you know, I'm a Jet fan. I'm also a giant fan but i i'm more jets than giants when joe namath came in in 1965 i i really took to him and and so i became a jet fan um larry you know when when we were working together i asked you the same kind of thing jason was asking i'm like why? Why are you stopping the show? And you just said, look at me.
I'm 76 years old. Look at me.
You're in incredible shape. I know the way you take care of yourself.
You eat great. You exercise.
You're out there every day. 76.
When's your birthday, by the way? Quick. July 2nd.
By the way, do you hate birthdays? You hate holidays? you hate holidays well I hate you know it becomes a job returning the birthday emails and the texts I agree it's a bit of a job so yeah I don't like it I really don't like it you know what I don't like is when people sing happy birthday to me I don't know what to do it's the worst like minute and a half all you can do is make a face and shake your head. Yeah.
It's a weird... Wait, what about all the other holidays? I get the birthday thing.
It becomes a job. I detest all holidays.
Detest them. Not one.
Not one. There's not one holiday that I like.
Wait, what about... I particularly hate Halloween.
I hate Thanksgiving. I hate Christmas.
New Year's I can stand because I know that the whole thing's going to be over soon after that night. Yeah, but you've got to stay up late.
No, I don't stay up. I haven't stayed up past 12 in 15 years.
Why Halloween? Because you've got to dress up. The costumes, the kids, the bothering, you know.
You're knocking on the door. By the way, my house is in darkness on Halloween.
Of course it is. All the lights are out.
Nobody knocks on the door. We put a sign out that says, sorry, no candy every single year.
Mary, you could probably get away with putting a sign that said, go fuck yourself, and people would fucking adore you for it. They'd fucking build you a goddamn monument.
I'm still really grinding on this over here. I remember, I've seen you at Conan's Christmas party a couple times, and it's great.
And that's, do you like going to parties? Well, that's kind of like, it's not a dinner party,

but they served great food and stuff.

But I imagine you don't like to sit down

at dinner parties, or do you?

The thing about the dinner party is you don't know

who's going.

And that's what really bothers me about it,

that it's such a fucking secret

as to who you're inviting.

And then you show up, oh, you're here. Oh, oh, oh, hello, you know.
Who needs that? Tell me who's going and I'll see if I want to go. Yeah.
Why can't I know? I should have a chance to educate my decision about the way I'm going to spend my night. Exactly.
And all of a sudden, then you're spending two and a half hours. Right.

With a stranger, you've got nothing to say to them.

Yeah.

Like, if you're not going to go to the beach, you're going to look at the weather.

And if the weather is rainy, you're not going to fucking go for two and a half hours, right?

Exactly.

That's right.

I don't get it.

I don't get it. So a couple of weeks ago, I was invited and I asked.

I said, who's going to be there? Right. And a fence was taken.
Sure. Okay.
And I didn't go. Good.
Smart. Because you found it because they told you? They told you? No, they didn't tell me.
Okay. Do you throw dinner parties? Me? Yeah.
Have I ever said, let's have a dinner party? Or let's say you have six, seven, eight people over. Would you then tell the other people who's coming? Yes.
Yes. Exactly.
Yeah. Yeah.
You know, I'm golden ruling it. Yeah.
I'm not trying to trick people over to my house. Yeah, exactly.
Yeah. I'm golden ruling it.
Yeah. I'm doing unto them as I want them to do unto me.
I'm with you on that. I get kind of offended.
These guys know, like, if you invite me to a one-year-old's birthday party, I'm fucking mad. I'm like, don't invite me to a one-year-old's birthday party.
That's outrageous. I'll go one step further.
Don't invite me to your wedding, you know? Don't invite me to your wedding on a weekend in the summer? The bar mitzvah is even worse than the wedding. Worse.
Those are go to the bar mitzvah because that's where all the make-outs happen. Yeah, just the service.
You just come to the service, not the party. Anything to do with it, they're just intolerable, top to bottom.
Oh, and you've got to bring a check. Yeah.
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All right, back to the show. So I wrote a bunch of like, I want to do like a speed thing with you because I wrote, what, you hate that? You're going to introduce a new format here? I'm not going to do that.
Just one word answers? You think Larry wants to do the speed? Or you can say fuck off. We've never done a speed.
Why are you doing it for Larry? This is just a terrible idea. Terrible.
Yeah, make Larry the monkey. Oh, Sean's upset.
Okay, Sean, do one speed thing. No, no.
One. Go ahead.
He's worked on it with Scotty all weekend. Let's hear it.
No, no. No, no, no.
This is going to be fun. No, it's not.
It's going to be horrible now. What about a stage story, Larry? What about when he went to Broadway? Oh, there you go.
Let's do that. How about that, Sean? Larry, I saw your show on Broadway.
You didn't see mine. I loved it, though.
If I had been in New York when it was on, I definitely would have got it. For six months.
I was going to fly to New York? Yes. I flew to New York to see yours.
Who asked you to? I didn't tell you to do that. I would have dissuaded you.
I would have said, are you nuts? I don't want you to come. That's what I would have told you.
And you should have told me the same thing. Like a good friend.
Yep. Now tell me, I did see that show and you were fucking great in it.
That's it. So nice of you to say that.
Wait, which one was this? Bring it back down. Which show? Something with fishes.
It's fishes. I'm on the fish.
It was called Fish in the Dark. Fish in the Dark.
Fish in the Dark. Yeah.
But I thought it was great, and you told me that you didn't love the experience of eight shows a week. No.
Did you not know that that's what you were getting into? I'm not shocked by that. How'd that sneak up on you, Larry? Yeah.
I don't know. It was the dumbest decision I've ever made in my life.

Have you spoken to that agent since?

It was my fault.

I'm the one who agreed to it.

It was my fault.

I didn't write it to be in it.

Right.

I got talked into it by the producer.

Wow.

Yeah.

And you hated it.

How long was that run?

It was, the first show was February 4th.

The last show was June 9th in 2015.

In the end of the day, we will be able to get the same information. And you hated it.
How long was that run? The first show was February 4th. The last show was June 9th in 2015.
Wow. Wow.
So 144 performances. How many months is that? February, March, April, May.
Yeah, it's five months, you dig bad. February, March, April, May.
Four and a half. Sean, how many did you do of Goodnight Oscar? Six months.
Oh, no. I did five months in New York and three months or two or three months.
But how many performances? He knows his number. He knows his number.
You don't know? I don't know. How many shows did you do a week? Seven.
Oh. Yeah.
That's better than eight. I couldn't sell the eight.
I got a moment to rest for a second. One less.
Yeah. Yeah.
But you had a heavy lift in that. You were driving the whole thing.
Yeah. Yeah.
And you hated it. Never again.
It was boring. Doing the same stuff over night after night after night, I found it boring.
Do you have any funny stories? Didn't you get hurt once? You lose your voice ever? No, I don't have any funny stories. Okay, good.
Did you? I did notice that. Great question though, Sean.
Thanks. That it becomes so rote and there's no creativity at all after you do the first 10.
Right. You're just doing the same thing over and over again.
It's kind of fun though to find new things, to try new things that are so small that make the scene better. Okay, I tried something new once.
Yeah, oh, I guess you do have a story. And I got so thrown by it, the whole system broke down, and I forgot the next line.
Oh, no. I looked a different way.
Instead of looking to the right, I looked to the left, and all of a sudden, it all went askew. How'd you get back on track? Did somebody whisper something from the wings? No, I realized where I was finally, but that was the last time I tried anything different.
Yeah, exactly. I was doing a play and this guy was carrying a briefcase in one hand and right before we went out, we went out at the same time.
He said, God, my hand hurts from carrying the briefcase the same way i go you should switch hands he goes oh i go but don't do it tonight he goes no i'll do it we walked out he forgot every line oh my god yeah that's that's exactly the story exactly what i'm talking about i got it i understand that's wild right those those neuropathways are dug so deep based on what uh larry what do you do when you're not, when you're you do when you're not not doing your show anymore and you're not doing stand up what do you I know you like to play golf but is there anything else that you like to do that you have any sort of stupid hobbies or anything that you do to occupy your time that people wouldn't know no not really what watch TV? What, do you got cable news on? I do what everybody else does. I read, I watch TV.
These guys don't read. No, I don't read.
Do you read nonfiction? Are you rereading stuff about world wars and things like that? Or do you like good romance novels? Romance novels? Yeah, you know, kind of fun. Do you read any spy novels you get into that shit or anything like that? I read a great book about the spies in England.
I forgot the name of it. No, no, no.
Sorry. I apologize.
I'm so sorry. We'll be cutting this, right? We'll cut that.
I probably read it. So I love at the beginning of this interview, you were like, I kind of regret being here.
And then my next question, I get it. And my next question was going to be, well, what else would you be doing? And apparently the answer is nothing.
Reading a magazine. Is that true? He'd rather be doing nothing than talking to us.
I love that. I have a quick, before we let you go there, I have this very quick, funny little thing that happened between me and you.
I'd love to get you to your speed round, though. No, it's too late to be hysterical but that's too bad so listen the uh the i it's the i love you story outside of hbo i don't know if you remember this i asked you to do a show a long time ago that i was producing and you graciously declined because you're not afraid to say no and then i didn't see you for like a year or something and then i was at the hbo building and I was waiting for an elevator, HBO building in Santa Monica, waiting for the elevator.
And when the doors opened, you were there. And the first thing you said before, I even said hello or anything.
And the doors open, you just go, I'm sorry. I just don't like those kinds of shows.
I'm so sorry. They're not for me.
I'm so sorry. You're great.
i just can't do it i go i'm like don't worry about it i don't care and but i thought it was fascinating you hung on to that for over a year and then when we were done chatting uh i said you know you don't have to ever worry about anything like that larry you know it's no big deal uh and don't worry about and you said, and you said, okay, and I said, I love you.

And then you said,

yeah, I don't worry about it, and you said, and you said, okay,

and I said, I love you.

And then you said,

yeah, I don't do that.

I don't do that.

I'm not going to say that.

And then I laughed,

and you walked away,

and like two minutes later,

we said goodbye,

and way in the distance,

you were getting in your car,

and I was still at the elevator, and you go,

I love you, Sean.

You old softy. I thought that was real sweet.
Yeah. Let's cut that, too.
Okay, great. Sweet Larry.
Sweet Larry. Larry, listen.
We don't want that out in the public. No.
We're going to let you go. Sean, real quick.
Real quick speed round, Sean. Real quick, go.
No, I got, it's too, I was going to ask. Fucking go.
Wait, let me see where they are now.

I got to find them.

Here we go.

Oh, it's on a computer?

Did you AI this?

I wrote them down last night.

I was like a...

What is it?

This is like a Rorschach thing?

No, I don't know what, I don't know who that is.

Would you rather be subjected to someone showing you pictures of their kids for an entire afternoon

or lose a foot?

Do you ever pick up a dinner?

No, that's not.

Do you ever watch Shark Tank,

by the way?

Yeah, it's a very good question.

But of course,

I need the foot, so. You need the foot.

Right.

I couldn't buy golf

without the foot.

No, you can't.

Oh, would you rather wear

only uncomfortable shoes

whenever you go outside

or comfortable shoes

24 hours a day

and can never take them off?

You can never take the shoes off? You mean even when you're sleeping yeah showering swimming things like that now listen what about this one would you rather live without the internet or live without air conditioning and heating easily that's such an easy question what do you think i'd rather live without the air conditioning i'd rather live without the internet internet, even without the air conditioning. I hate the internet.
What's something that you just recently realized that you were embarrassed you didn't realize earlier? What's that? It's bad. What would the world be like if it was filled with male and female copies of you? That's the last one.
I think it would be a much better place. Much better.
Wow. There you go.
That's the only one we're keeping.

Good answer.

Larry David, you're the sweetest.

I had the best time with you on your show.

Thank you for being on this show.

Curb your enthusiasm.

The final, is it called The Final Frontier?

What's the name?

Is there like a subtitle?

No, it's just true. I don't think so.

I think it's called That's Enough.

That's Enough.

That's Enough.

Yeah.

I like that.

Yeah. That would be a nice Larry David.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's very that's enough yeah I like that yeah that would be a nice Larry David yeah yeah yeah that's enough yeah that's very good yeah I'm looking Sean I'm really looking forward to people seeing you on Curb because you're fantastic in it well thank you thank you for having me I loved it it was so fun boy we had we had some good laughs Will and I are happy to be involved in any of the reshoots.
Or promotion. Additional photography.
We'll just do promo for the... We'll just do the junket.
Hey, guys, this wasn't as awful as I thought it was going to be. Hey, thanks, man.
That's one of the best reviews we've ever had. Did you have more fun here or on Morning Joe? I was so excited when I saw you on my favorite show, Morning Joe.
Was it great? I'm so jealous you were on that set. Yeah, they're great.
I want to go over there and say hi to those guys. Do you still golf there? Oh, yeah.
You do? Not today. It's rainy.
Too wet today. You see these guys there ever? We've played.
I do. I see them out there.
Yeah. We're going to play together one day.
I'm off until October. I'm around.
I played over at your club the other day for the Pro-Am they did. Yeah, I don't even get invited to that.
Is that true? Will just went ahead and won it. Come on.
He won it. He won the Pro-Am on Wednesday.
What? Yeah, he had three birdies. My team did.
Yeah, I did have three birdies. Who did you play with? I played with Sebastian Maniscalco and who else did I play with? And with Jeff Azoff.
Who was your pro? With Sam Burns. Wow, really? Yeah, and he was great.
Sam Burns went low that day, and Jeff Azoff is great, as you know. He plays at your club.
He's terrific. He's a club champ.
And then Sebastian, forget about it. And then, I mean, just to put it in terms that he would understand.
He's so funny. Don't you find it curious that I'm not invited to play in that Pro-Am? I find it very curious.
How are you not invited to play at the Pro-Am? It's your own club, and you're a huge star. And then I'm there.
Fucking ding-dong. And then Will's there.
Canadian asshole. Canadian moron gets invited.
How are you not? They're trying to go international. Anyway, well, Larry, we'll get out and play someday.
That would be good. And I'll show you around your own club and where to hit it and stuff, you know.
What's your index? I'm a 10.8. Oh, you're not terrible.
You're much better than I am. No, you're right around there, Larry.
No, no, I'm not. This Bateman charactereman character, he's got himself slain.
You know, he shot a 70 at Bel Air two weeks ago.

Wow.

Can you believe that?

Scared the shit out of me.

Wow, 70.

Wow.

That was the last round I played, and I won't play again until October.

That, is that so?

Where are you going?

Yeah, I'll probably shoot 105.

Just working, you know.

I'm still out here humping, you know, trying to dance as fast as I can.

He's going to New York to work. He's back here this week but what are you what are you doing in new york i'm doing some crime drama thingamabob that's why i'm growing out all this crap beard and hair and all this nonsense what are you playing a cop or i'm playing a loser right look how am i doing yeah i got it you didn't need to grow out the hair and the beard for that, dude.
Hey! Larry, I miss you. I'd love to have at least some food with you soon.
Please say hi to Ashley. You're very nice to be doing this today with us.
That was very kind of you. Very, very cool.
I don't know what to say to that. I know you hate it It should be, and I know you hate it, and not to embarrass you,

you've done so much great stuff in your career, and for guys

like me, and I can speak for these guys,

it's a thrill. Honestly,

you're such a funny guy, you're such a funny

writer, such a funny performer, and it's

inspiring to be totally honest.

Again, not to put you on the spot, you don't have to respond,

but it's great, and we look up to

people like, you know, to you and what you do. I think it's awesome.
What you do is not easy. One of my faves.
Inspiring. You make it look very easy.
Truly. And people need to know that it is not easy.
They'll say, oh, he's playing himself. Guess what, guys? Not simple.
Incredibly talented. And I know it's not.
Thank you. And sometimes it's not cool and comedy to pay those kinds of compliments or whatever, but it is true, and you are definitely an inspiration.
So thank you for all the awesome stuff you've done. Well, you're very, very nice to say that.
I wish I could take it in. I know, you don't have to.
You'll think about it again right when you're going to bed tonight, and you get a little grin, and a little thought bubble. All right, guys, see you.
Thank you. Take care, pal.
Larry, love you. Larry? Larry? Larry? I love you! There it is.
You got it. He's great.
I think I really do love that man. I just love being around him.
Yeah, his deepest, darkest secret is that he's a sweetheart. I know.
Such a sweetheart. Yeah.
I met his wife. Jay, you know his wife, Ashley? Tiny bit, yeah.
I met her once. She's so sweet.
I only met her one time. They're a lot of fun.
I like them a lot. Yeah, he's, you know, like Will was saying, he's one of the greats, you know? And that show's been on for 20, what did he say, four years? 20 say four years 20 some years i really honestly genuinely would love to be on a set with him i that would be really really rewarding so fun so i missed my chance i gotta know something he'll do something he'll do other stuff he'll do other stuff maybe this was it maybe this was us working together this was the beginning he legit did? And I was like, what's your show? Right.
You never asked me, so. Yeah.
Do you ever say that when somebody comes up to you and asks to be on Smart List and you say, yeah, why haven't we had you on yet? And meanwhile, you're thinking, we're not going to have him on. Yeah.
Yeah. See, it happens.
I guess. It's tough.
I know. It's tough to hear the truth, I guess.
But he has his legacy or like his, he's got, he can always say he has one of the greatest shows in the history of American television. Two.
Two of the greatest shows. Two of the greatest shows.
And now. And he's only done two.
And he's only done two. Well, except for the, the, the, the Gottfried failed pilot, I guess.
But we won't talk about that. No, we just, you just brought it up.
Well, but it's not even, he's not even two for three. because it was just a pilot, never aired.
So he's at 60%. Now he's at 66%.
I guess a second ago, he was batting 1,000, and now he's still Hall of Fame. Only been on two television shows, and they're both probably in the top ten ever in the history of television.
Well, three. The Gilbert Gottfried thing.
Anyway. I know.
He is so incredible. He's so fucking incredible.
And I do mean it. Apart from that, not only did he write himself licensed to do what he wants, right? In terms of his behavior and being as cranky as he wants in a way that is really, you know,

invokes a lot of jealousy in me.

But also he got, you know, paid really handsomely to do that.

I don't think so.

I think the story is that he deferred all the money

because he just likes, he just did it for the art.

He never cashed those checks.

Did not get a dollar from Seinfeld.

No kidding. Wow.
Yeah, he just loved it a dollar from Seinfeld. No kidding.

Wow.

Yeah, he just loved it.

Didn't talk about it.

No kidding.

Somebody about that.

Yeah, we should call him back.

Yeah, I just loved it.

You know, no, seriously, somebody told me that,

and they promised me that they are aware of this information,

and they can prove it because they have an alibi.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Smart. Bye.
Bye. Smart.

Smart.

Smart.

Smart.

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and artisanally handcrafted by

Bennett Barbaco,

Michael Grant Terry, and Rob Armjarf. Smart.
Bless. Guys, Jason had to scoot very quickly and apologize profusely for not being here for this little thing that we're about to do, which we're really excited about.
He's missing the party. He's missing the fun.
He's missing the party. Yes.
He does feel really, really bad. Yeah.
But we have a couple guests with us today for a super quick plug for a new Smart List media show called Pretty Sure I Can Fly. We can't wait for the show.
We're super pumped. One of the hosts is a friend of the podcast.
He's been on before, an actor, filmmaker, has made us laugh for literally years. And his partner in crime is a woman who we haven't had the pleasure of meeting yet.
Sorry, and figuratively years. And figuratively years.
You said literally years. And figuratively years.
But literally years. At least me.
And a woman who we haven't had the pleasure of meeting yet who will be a friend of the show after this little chat and giggle. She's a brilliant writer and produced one of the all-time greats of This American Life.
Love that show. Willie, let's say hello to Johnny Knoxville and Elna Baker.
Okay, I'm going to say hello. Hello.
Well, hello. Hi.
Hi, guys. This is so exciting that you're here.
Tell us about the show. I can't wait.
I mean, I know about it, but tell everybody else about it. Yeah.
It's a show about people with more balls than a bowling alley. Sure.
It's people who have achieved great things while thumbing their nose at naysayers, established thought, failure, personal safety, and gravity. Yeah, I love that.
I love, like, the press release that says for people who have done things that have never been done until someone did them. Yeah.
That's pretty good writing, huh? Yeah, it's pretty good. And I will say, Knoxville, you've got some history with this.
You've obviously spent some time in between, you know, over the years doing shit that other people won't do, stuff that seems really scary and gnarly. Yeah.
So I can see it. But, Elna, how much of an appetite do you have for doing shit that you're not, you didn't think people could do? I mean, to an extent, I mean, I grew up Mormon, so I wasn't allowed to do anything.
Right. And so, like, for me, I guess, it wasn't, like, being brave in terms of, like, jumping off a cliff, but it was, like, leaving a religion, giving hand jobs..
Like there were, you know, there were the things that I had to figure out. That was the first thing.
Wow. And that's why I joined.
Well, that's what led you to leave ultimately one of the things, right? You were 28? Yes, I left at 20. I touched a penis for the first time at 28.
Is that true? 28. That is true, yeah.
And was touching the penis the thing that opened the... Yes, it was.
That was the gateway? Penis was the gateway drug? The penis was the gateway. Yeah.
Wow. When did you have your first Coke? Coca-Cola.
Like Coca-Cola? Otherwise, she was going to say 8 a.m. I was like a, we were the kind of Mormons who drank Coca-Cola, but I didn't have my first coffee until I was 28.
And I remember like being so afraid to order it just because I didn't know how to say the word. Wait, so everything happened at 28? Everything, because I left at 28.
Yeah, once I touched a dick, I was, you know. Yeah, tell me about it.
Same. Yeah, tell me about it.
Catholicism, same thing. So wait, did you, do you still have family members in the church? Everyone, yeah.
Everyone is still in the church. Do you still, do you have a good relationship? Decent, yeah, great, yeah.
Johnny, what about you? Well, starting with decent. I mean, I'd love to dig into that a little bit.
You open with decent. I'm going to take you a word.
And I realize they might hear this. By the way, if they're listening to this, then they're lapsed and then they're just as guilty as you are and now the playing field is level.
Yeah, but Johnny, what denomination did you grow up in? Catholicism? Oh, Southern Baptist. It was intense.
I's right. Was it hardcore? Well, I didn't realize how intense it was at the time.
But, you know, it's not like the Pentecostals who handle snakes. But, you know, in Southern Baptist, you're not supposed to dance or, you know.
But my parents didn't believe in it. They weren't that so.
But if you, the Pentecostals, they could maybe be on an episode of Pretty Sure I Can Fly because if they're handling snakes. Oh, yeah.
There you go. That's what I'm saying.
I'm saying being so repressed makes you want to go take these risks later on in life. Oh, totally.
I mean, that's one of the things that, like, I love about interviewing the different people we've interviewed is, like, I remember this sports writer telling me that, like, all the greatest athletes had some primal wound.

And that thing that happened in their childhood is what makes them, like, achieve or even try. For sure.
And so many of these people that we've talked to, like, you find out, oh, like, you know, Manny Puig, who, you know, you've seen on Jackass and who Johnny knows.

Like, I had no idea that, that like his father was killed by a firing squad in cuba like the origins of what made him that's crazy do these insane brave things came from like something really deep and real or like garrett mcnamara who's the 100 foot wave guy he's learned about his child it's bonkers like he basically like at one point his mother was this hippie but she put him in this cult a lot of cults a lot of cults but the sort of the most memorable he was in many cults? many cults but the one they had to renounce all their possessions. He and his brother had to wear bedsheets.

They just walked around.

They had to beg for everything.

They couldn't buy anything.

And it was just so humiliating to be walking the streets in Berkeley

in these outfits begging for things.

That's amazing.

These backstories are like what get them to do these things.

Yeah, it's incredible.

Johnny, have any of these stories inspired you to try something?

Well, I'm a little slow on the uptake, so I'm trying to not do things anymore. I'm trying to overcome my, you know, my...
Addiction to put yourself in dangerous situations? It did become addiction it must it must what is the it was there a thing like was there like a common uh trait that you noticed in a lot of these people that you other than the childhood a lot of them came from difficult childhoods anything else like that sort of had the game that fearlessness i think the yeah it's if there's a through line for people on the show, it's bravery and being colorful. And these people are extremely determined.
Yeah. Very determined.
Yeah, wow. And usually, I mean, like, it's complicated though, right? Because like you're talking about like adrenaline junkies, right? Right, right, right.
Some are. Some like get in and then kind of become addicted and then they're trying to accomplish something great, but they're also like putting their – I mean you're a perfect example, Johnny.
Like you – Put your life on the – Yeah, you kept putting your life on the line and then ultimately like suffered a traumatic brain injury brain injury. So, like, there's this level at which, like, you're on the razor's edge of, like, admiring and also being like, you guys should stop.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sean wants to know, I'm just asking, because I don't want to embarrass, he doesn't want to embarrass himself, can you get a traumatic brain injury from watching TV every night? You can, but it's...
But look at me, I'm still here. Hey, Sean, have you seen 100 Foot Wave, by the way? No.
You have to watch this. And it's by that guy, Garrett McNamara.
I definitely told you about it. I'm writing it down right now.
Watching what these big wave surfers do, not just Garrett, but all those guys. When I see those guys when they're like, man, there's this storm coming to Portugal, to Nazarene.
We got to get there. We've got 48 hours.
We need to get there because there's a fucking crazy storm. And I need to get on a surfboard and have a dude tow me in behind a ski do so I can get on the storm waves.
And I'm thinking like, I'm looking for the closest restaurant that's got a happy hour. was just gonna say i want to make sure you know what kind of what do they have on draft i'm looking for the next uh harry potter movie yeah man yeah you know crazy but yeah that's that's insane that wait so are you guys is it fun have you guys been having a good time like is it like it's got to be fascinating to learn all these stories they sound incredible incredible.
It's so fascinating. Yeah, I mean, just talking to Ty Stokes, who was the,

on the Jamaican founding member of the Jamaican

bobsled team, the real

story behind that team

is so much more interesting than the movie.

Cool Runnings?

Yeah. Yeah, Cool Runnings butchered

it. Like, the actual story.
No, wait, now

you're telling me that the Disney movie

Cool Runnings, that was trying to

capitalize on the Jamaican bobsled

team, that it wasn't

Thank you. Really? That's great.
Cool story? Oh, it's an insane story. He got put on this team like a mere months before the Olympics started.
They didn't have a bobsled. They didn't have a bobsled track.
They'd never been on ice. Yeah, they didn't have a place to train.
They didn't even get to go down a bobsled down the, what do you call it? The hill or whatever? The track. Like, what, two or three weeks before the Olympics for the first time? Are you serious? Yeah.
How did they qualify? Sean, do you know this? They ended up training for money. They trained on daiquiris.
They would go... So stupid.
How did they qualify? Anyway, you know what? We're going to listen to the podcast. That's how we're going to find out.
We're going to listen to it. I can't wait.
It's called Pretty Sure I Can Fly. It's Johnny Knoxville and Elna Baker together again.
You guys make such a great pair. The show sounds so awesome.

I truly can't wait to listen to it.

It is available right now on whatever podcast platform

you're currently listening to.

Yeah.

Thank you.

Thank you so much,

Johnny and Elna.

All right.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thanks, guys.

Thanks a lot.

We appreciate it.

We're about to play a clip

from Pretty Sure I Can Fly.

Follow Pretty Sure I Can Fly

on the Wondery app

or wherever you get your podcasts.

Ladies and gentlemen, Travis Pastrana.

Everybody in this house is now standing up and cheering on the 199.

Go, Travis!

Can you tell me the story of the double backflip? Because that to me was also, I mean, I got chills in that moment in the movie. But I would love to hear you tell me the story.
There's very few times in your life where something that means so much to you means so much to a group around you. And even more rare that it means that much to the world.
I still have people tell me almost once a week, I get someone that still remembers where they were at that moment. You know, my grandma and all her friends watch it.
It's live on TV. My mom was crying because she had known that, you know, I'm about 75% in the phone pit, but if it comes around short, there's a really good chance of a broken neck or paralyzed.
It was a really cool moment. And even up until you did it, it seemed like, was it really like, I don't know if I'm going to go through with it or not? And the reason, like, we were just explaining, like, you always say I'm in or I'm out.
The reason this was such a tough decision for me, and I think the reason that it got built up more, was because I was on the fence on this. I have an opportunity to go out there and try a trick that I've been working for for three, four years, but I'm sitting third.
So I'm like, if I don't do a double backflip, I still get a medal. Yeah.
I still get paid. Yeah.
Which is going to really help everything else that I've been putting into to rally. And is my goal to be a freestyle motocross rider or is my goal to continue on in action sports and to have a career that's going to expand, hopefully longer? And it worked out in rally.
And I said, you know what? I'm both. I said, I'm going to land this trick.
And went out there and decided, like literally last second, played rock, paper, scissors with my redneck friend,bert wait you you the the deciding factor was a rock paper scissors oh my god it came down to that right before i went up there hubert we went rock paper scissors i gave thumbs up to basically sal and the guys and they're like all right they raised the ramp and no one has ever done this before at that time i had done it to a sand pile um in a controlled environment that was a big step up so if you came up short uh or didn't make it it sucked but it was you know it's okay yeah it was a hard surface that day right it was just blue groove it was it was pretty much worst case scenario for me we took the ramp that was already existing and then raised it on two by fours. And

like, it looked like something we'd built in our backyard for like, you know, when we were five years old. And it's like, you know, my dad's out there like strapping the ramp down and trying to get it so it doesn't move because the ramp falls over.
Then I'm definitely going to deep. So we'd and so you're up there and you're about to go.
Yeah, it was one of the coolest experiences ever. got up there and

the guy that drops me in

he gave me a thumbs up

he said up there and you're about to go. Yeah, it was one of the coolest experiences ever.
Um, got up there and, uh, the guy that, that drops me in, he gave me a thumbs up. He said, it's on you to take your time.
And I looked around and every single person was on their feet. Yeah.
Entire sold out staple center. All of my heroes.
You had, uh, Kevin Robinson. You had Chad Keggy.
They were holding hands. I had Brian Deegan.
All the militia was all down there looking. You know, it was one of the coolest experiences.
And I just, I remember inside my helmet smiling. And when I dropped in, everything kind of went to slow motion.
Usually you get a slow motion if anyone's crashed a car or been in a really bad, like where you think everything's going bad. I've never had a slow motion where I took off and I can remember the smells.
I can remember the sounds. I can remember everything was so vivid.
And, you know, I came around on the first pull and I checked the landing. And I remember thinking, you know, as Trevor Jacobs said later, he's like, oh, you can't check.
And I'm like, oh no, now I'm short. And I whip my head back and I see the lights.
So when you practice this trick, you know, in the foam pit, you have, you know, you got the sky above you and in the ground. But on this day, you've got blinding lights where you can't see anything straight ahead of you.
And then below you is kind of dark. And I just remember kind of just smiling again.
I'm like, well, I'm all in. I can't get out of this now.
And I came around and like literally hit, couldn't have hit better. And I was just like, what the heck just happened? I dropped down and dropped the bike and I run up.
And the first person there was just some drunk guy out of the stands that just overpowered the security and gave me a big hug up top. I'm like, I don't even know you, but yes, let's go.
Oh! Oh my word! Are you kidding me? How many times can you find the Holy Grail in one building? A double backflip from Travis Pastrana. That was pretty cool.
I was at home watching it live, and it was like I had tears going down my cheeks like the end of Old Yeller because it was such an amazing moment and so memorable. Yeah, I was blown away.
Is that, you think that's the biggest moment of your career or? Moment that the world felt what I felt. You can listen to Pretty Sure I Can Fly early and ad-free by joining Wondery Plus.
Join Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. Hey friends, Jason here.
We're so excited the Smart List has officially joined the SiriusXM family. We can't wait to announce new surprise guests who we know that you'll love.
If you want to be the first to hear new episodes ad-free in a whole week early, subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts Plus on Apple Podcasts or visit SiriusXM.com slash podcasts plus to start your free trial today. deposit.
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