"Tina Fey"

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Speaker 1 Sean, you'll never guess what we're going to do today. Are we going to record an episode? Did I just guess it right?

Speaker 1 Well, first, man, how many times? Baby steps. First thing we're going to do is we're going to welcome our audience and we're going to say, oh, welcome.
welcome to smart

Speaker 1 list try to do it in time okay sorry one more time one two three i'm three no the moment's gone three oh

Speaker 1 welcome to smart list smart

Speaker 1 list

Speaker 1 smart

Speaker 1 less

Speaker 1 smart

Speaker 1 less

Speaker 1 speaking of hydrating uh did you do you run six miles yet today, Babin? No, no.

Speaker 2 It'll be after this.

Speaker 1 I didn't think so. Just looking at you, I didn't think so.
I'm holding a little water right now, yeah.

Speaker 2 It's going to be after this session. So I got a real tight, I got a hard out in

Speaker 2 55 minutes.

Speaker 1 I was on my, I was boxing today. I did my, you know, I'm doing this, this thing, boxing at home.
I mean, I know, listen, it's a tough guy thing, obviously. You box at home? Like in your garage?

Speaker 1 Yeah, like just with boxes. Like I'm just putting boxes together.
Oh, okay. Beautiful.
What did you think I meant?

Speaker 2 Do you don't really have, you're not one of those dorks with a

Speaker 1 heavy bag hanging in your garage?

Speaker 1 That's gross.

Speaker 1 Do you really have one? It's not hanging. It's on a stand.
I got one of these things.

Speaker 2 He's on the ground.

Speaker 1 He just tackles it. Thoreau talked me into it.
And then you look at Thoreau's arms. He's on the cover of Esquire, Justin Thoreau.
Thank you.

Speaker 2 Jesus. Why haven't we had Justin on the show yet?

Speaker 1 Because we want to talk about him more. We haven't talked about him enough on the show to then have him on the show.
I would like, I met him like once or twice.

Speaker 1 Such a nice guy, but I don't know him like you guys do. I would love to.

Speaker 2 Well, Will, which one of us

Speaker 2 can't really be surprised? One of us has got to.

Speaker 1 Well, one of us is going to get on it and the other one's going to be surprised that the other one did it first. Look, anyway, we got to get to our guest.
Our guest is an incredible writer, performer.

Speaker 1 Started as a performer, became a writer, then started becoming a performer again.

Speaker 1 And the second I mention one of the things, you're going to be like, I know exactly who this is.

Speaker 1 We've talked a lot over the episodes with people who've been on SNL. We haven't had anybody who's been on the anchor desk.
This person was on the anchor desk for many years.

Speaker 1 Tina, Tina, Tina, Tina, Tina, Tina. She wrote Mean Girls.
Tina. She wrote everything.
She did everything as Tina. Tina.

Speaker 3 Hi, my three buddies.

Speaker 1 How are you? Oh, one RG is outside.

Speaker 1 You can't say anything and then not know that it's Tina. Thank you.

Speaker 1 Wait, are you in, is that an outside area of your apartment that I never saw the outside area?

Speaker 3 No, I have a I have a weekend home now since the last I saw you Sean.

Speaker 2 There's no apartments in the Hudson Valley.

Speaker 1 No, she weekends in the Hudson Valley. This is yeah, this is her weekend home.

Speaker 3 It's my weekend home.

Speaker 1 Tina, do you and I have the exact same frames?

Speaker 3 I think yours look black and white. Mine look are a little tortoisey.

Speaker 3 Can I tell you something? Just so you know, like something, what I'm dealing with here, there's an incredibly passive-aggressive nine-year-old out here with me who will not vacate the area.

Speaker 1 Really?

Speaker 3 And

Speaker 3 she's playing some basketball, which is like,

Speaker 3 this is probably the first day in her life that she's chosen to play some basketball, and it's during this podcast.

Speaker 1 But that's okay. It's a great home.
Oh, here it comes. It's great ambient sound.
Incoming, incoming. It's great ambient sound.

Speaker 1 So, Tina, Tina, tell me, so yes, we've all been at home for the last year, or some version of home, or in one of our many homes.

Speaker 1 One of our many, many homes. It's so relatable.
But do you, do you, so what, what does that mean for you right now getting back to it?

Speaker 1 Because you're always, I always feel like you're always creating, I know you've just created a new show. Yeah.
Right. That's about to start.

Speaker 3 Yeah, well, I just, we have a, I produced a show

Speaker 3 called Girls 5 Eva that comes out on Peacock on May 6th. What's it called? It's called Girls 5 Eva.

Speaker 1 And it's a comedy.

Speaker 3 It's super funny.

Speaker 2 It starts you out with a laugh.

Speaker 1 There we go. Yeah, Girl Climb.

Speaker 1 The title.

Speaker 3 It's about a bunch of women who were in sort of a Danity Kane-level girl group around 2000. And then their song gets sampled now.
And they're like, should we, we're all 40.

Speaker 3 We should get our band back together, right?

Speaker 3 And it stars.

Speaker 1 That's a good idea. It's really funny.

Speaker 3 Yeah, it's really funny. It's Meredith Gardino is the creator on it.
And it stars Sarah Borellis, who is a delight. And her voice is ridiculous.
And she's incredible.

Speaker 3 And also, she's like a lovely natural actress. And then Renee Elise Goldsberry,

Speaker 3 who you know from, oh, I don't know, fucking Hamilton Will. Jesus.

Speaker 2 You get the look off her.

Speaker 1 Are you saying that? Are you saying that? Because I'm the only

Speaker 1 for so long, I was the only person who hadn't seen it. It was my badge of honor because I was like, I want to see a fucking musical.
Stop telling me it's so great. It's a musical.
And did you?

Speaker 1 I did get it. I did see it.
It was great. Yeah, it was great.
It was great.

Speaker 1 I was wrong.

Speaker 3 And then the wait, let me tell you the other two ladies. Izzy Phillips.

Speaker 1 Sure. Sure.
She's great.

Speaker 3 And American treasurer Paula Pell.

Speaker 1 Oh, she's the best. Oh, my God, Paula Pell.
We were just talking about Paula Pellell. So, Paula Quebelli.

Speaker 1 She was a writer on Saturday Night Live forever, and now, and not now, but always kind of an actress. And now, but people are finally recognizing her.

Speaker 3 Yeah, well, she's sort of, you know, we always joke with Paul that she finally aged into her type because she was always the kid at like 12 years old. She was in the play with gray spray in her hair.

Speaker 3 And now she's like,

Speaker 1 she's her actual type now gray spray acting actor call him a she's reeked of gray spray for 30 years of her life sure so so tina let we we have to do this because uh and but for you it's it's you know obviously you hate going back over like oh this is what i did but it's interesting to everybody who listens and it's super interesting to us because

Speaker 1 not to embarrass you but you're such a fucking huge piece of the comedy landscape and have been for so long.

Speaker 1 And you're such a great voice, incredible incredible writer incredible performer you started yeah i've just always you know there's a buttina no there's no but i'm usually is very fond of you and and and i i'm such a huge fan and awe of of your talent you started in you moved to chicago in early 90s

Speaker 3 i let me think yeah 90 i graduated in 92 spring of 92 i graduated from the university of virginia so i think i moved in the fall of 1992 yes yeah so you're from pennsylvania and then you move i know so you moved to Chicago, you start Second City, right?

Speaker 3 Yeah, so I went to UVA kind of randomly, and then I went to Chicago and I started Improv Olympic first and class at the Second City, and that's where I met Amy Poehler.

Speaker 1 Sure.

Speaker 3 And a bunch of other people that only Amy Poehler and I know.

Speaker 3 But like, but like Kevin Dorr from Brian Stack and Miriam Tollen, all those guys. Dratch, Rachel Dratch.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Dratch.

Speaker 1 Those were your contemporaries. I remember like those were that was kind of your crew, all those people.

Speaker 2 So is it crazy that like three of those people end up on Saturday Night Live? I mean, that's, that's like the odds of that is crazy.

Speaker 3 I mean, it is, and it isn't, I guess, because, well, then at the time, there's like the Groundlings, stand-ups, the Groundlings, and S and Second City were the places they looked.

Speaker 3 Now, you know, the internet has become the great equalizer. And you find people on YouTube.
You find people on TikTok, presumably.

Speaker 1 I'm so surprised I didn't run into you.

Speaker 3 Yeah, you were a musical director. Well, you didn't run into me because I don't think, because you were a musical director out in the burbs, right?

Speaker 1 Yeah, in the burbs, but I was always downtown Chicago, always around the,

Speaker 1 I had some friends at Second City. I'm just surprised we never had to.
And the best station.

Speaker 1 The bus station. Yeah.
Wait, so Tina, so you, those are kind of your peeps. I know that, like, Dratch and Amy and Stack and Miriam and all those kinds of guys were yours.

Speaker 3 Yeah, and Horatio.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you got another one on there. Glazer, like all those kinds of people were there too, right? Like in Chicago.

Speaker 3 Glazer, I was Glazer's understudy. I was John Glazer's understudy.
Yeah. And then he left to do Dana Carvey, right?

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 3 To work with Dana Carvey. And I got to go onto the main stage when he left.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 So then you moved from Chicago to SNL. Like McKay and those guys were kind of seniors when you guys were freshmen.
Is that kind of the idea? Adam McKay. Exactly.

Speaker 3 Adam McKay was already head writer at SNL.

Speaker 3 And he, I submitted my writer's packet to him because I had been on stage at Second City and Lauren Michaels and Marcy Klein had come to scout talent and zero interest in me as a performer.

Speaker 3 So I was like, well, writer's packet it is.

Speaker 1 And then just for people who don't know, Adam McKay was Will Farrell's business partner and writer of SNL and writer of all these amazing movies. And then he directs crazy, huge movies now.
And yeah,

Speaker 1 now he directs a lot of dramatic movies.

Speaker 3 He's an Oscar winner now, guys.

Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah. But also for Wisconsin, there is a, you can either be a performer or a writer on Saturday Night Live.

Speaker 1 And sometimes you make the leap. You get hired as a writer like Sudecus.
I remember Sadekis this first year was a writer.

Speaker 3 Yeah, Sudecus was a writer.

Speaker 3 did not want to be a writer. Conan was a writer.

Speaker 1 The best part about Sudecus being a writer and not wanting to be a writer was that he let everybody know. So

Speaker 1 in the best way, in the best way. Tina,

Speaker 1 were you one of those people that always dreamed of being on a Saturday Night Live? Because I hear so many alums saying, oh, when I was a kid, all I ever wanted.

Speaker 1 And then they get their, and then their dream comes true and they're on Saturday Night Live.

Speaker 3 Yeah, it is.

Speaker 3 I feel like I so wanted to be on Saturday Night Live that to me, I would like, it would be hard for me to understand meeting anyone who didn't want to do that.

Speaker 1 Right, right, yeah.

Speaker 3 What do you mean you don't want to do that?

Speaker 2 And then were you disappointed that they didn't, that they didn't select you for the performing part, or were you more comfortable writing anyway?

Speaker 3 I was always a bit more of a writer, even the way I contributed to the company in Second City, I definitely was like an idea person.

Speaker 3 I wasn't someone, I didn't have that, that magic thing that Horatio Sands or Rachel Drasch have where like they come out and you're just like, oh, this is going to be good.

Speaker 3 Like they just are sparkly, you know?

Speaker 2 Don't you feel like like to a certain extent, like you're kind of, I don't know, this is going to sound mean for performers, but you're kind of overqualified to be a performer.

Speaker 2 Like it's really hard to be a writer, I think. Really hard to be a director.

Speaker 2 Less hard to be an actor because. Everybody does that every day anyway, whether you're an actor or not.

Speaker 2 I mean, people change their behavior when they're with their grandmother versus their best friend. Like people know how to adjust the way in which they come across.
Like that's acting.

Speaker 2 But writing, direct, I feel like that's really difficult stuff.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I mean, I think it is, it's more work than writing and directing. It is like people who are really good actors.

Speaker 3 Listen, acting is like 99% having a good face. It doesn't have to be a beautiful face.
It's like an interesting face. It could be, you know what I mean? It could be, it could be Lupita Nyango.

Speaker 3 It could be Steve Buscemi, but you got to have a face that people want to look at.

Speaker 3 And that's like 99% of it. And then the other, like, then 0.4% beyond that is talent.

Speaker 1 But I think you have that. I think, you know, what you're saying about Horatio and Rachel, you have that thing too, where you come out and people are like, oh my God, that's going to be so good.

Speaker 1 Because it's you. It's Tina Faye, who's always fucking funny and always delivers.
So I think people get just as excited.

Speaker 3 That's very kind. I think now I think I've like slowly worn people down.
I think it's been like, it's mirrored my dating life in every way. I'm just like, I'll wear you the f I'll wear you the fun.

Speaker 1 But Tina, you got to admit, like in the best way, like you kind of Trojan horse them. Like, you know, Marcy and Lauren come in and they sort of like, okay, and they don't even see you or whatever.

Speaker 1 And then you come and you submit your packet. Obviously, McKay wants, you know, he knows how brilliant you are.
You come, you start submitting on SNL and then you.

Speaker 1 your talent just shows through and you end up getting it in spite of them and become like the biggest star on the show for many years. That's got to feel kind of gratifying.

Speaker 1 I don't mean that in a shitty way, but it must feel like, yeah, I always knew I could do this in a real way.

Speaker 3 It was, you know, yeah, the long grift sort of paid off. I mean, there's a couple factors.
There's like the team of gay scientists that fix my appearance, you know.

Speaker 2 That's the title of your next series, by the way.

Speaker 3 The gay scientists. And then like, I always say don't underestimate how gloriously lazy Lorne is about casting.

Speaker 3 Cause this is like Conan, like, do you think someone was like going all over town and being like, where's Where's a pasty seven-foot redhead that we can put that we can give a talk show to?

Speaker 3 It's like, no, he was around the office being funny around the office, and that's the same thing happened here. It was like, we need to new update anchors.

Speaker 3 Like, let me look inside my own eyelids for like who's available.

Speaker 1 Do you prefer one of the one over the other, acting and writing? Like, do you miss performing when you're not in a writer's room and vice versa?

Speaker 3 Writing is like, it's only fun to have written something. Like writing's only fun after it's over.

Speaker 1 Right. And

Speaker 3 performing is like fun while it's happening. And then for me, if you're me, you usually look back after and go, oh, yeah, that wasn't.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that would include my, I would include myself in that.

Speaker 3 Yeah. Do you think that, yeah?

Speaker 1 Yeah, no, I would just like, like, I'm beat myself up all the time.

Speaker 3 Well, you're crazy.

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Speaker 2 So it is common for the weekend anchor to not be a performer, correct?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 3 Well, Chevy was first, right? He was

Speaker 3 mostly just that.

Speaker 2 He was not a performer that much on the show, was he?

Speaker 3 Not too much. He was a little bit.
He did Gerald Ford and some commercials.

Speaker 2 Is it common for the head writer to be the

Speaker 2 anchor?

Speaker 3 It is now, because Joast and Che

Speaker 3 are the head writers, I think, among them.

Speaker 2 Seth as well was, yes.

Speaker 3 Seth was, yes, yeah. You know what I really did learn at that time, too, is that I learned, you know, after Jimmy left, and then Lauren was like, well, do you want to do it by yourself?

Speaker 3 And I thought, like, well, I'm supposed to want to do it by myself, right? Yeah. And I think we even did like that.
And then at the last minute, I was like, I don't want to. I want to do it with Amy.

Speaker 3 And I realized that's where I learned that I don't work a single.

Speaker 1 Right.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I kind of remember that. I remember that first, that was a very late-breaking decision.
Very late. Rudely late.
And then it turned out to be obviously great. And you guys, that was such an

Speaker 1 exciting time for the show. You guys were so good.
And it was so much fun. And it was fun to have a front row seat to that.
It was amazing.

Speaker 1 And then you guys, at that kind of, right in that same year, you guys were doing Mean Girls at the same time. That first year you started, right?

Speaker 1 You guys were shooting while you were doing the update. Remember that? It was crazy.

Speaker 3 Maybe. I think you're probably, I'm going to assume that you're right about that.
So many things I I drag to trash. I don't remember a lot of things.

Speaker 1 Drag to trash. That's the name of my biography.

Speaker 3 But that seems right.

Speaker 1 Tina, are you still a fan of SNL? Of course you are. I'm sure you are.
Is there anybody that you just are completely drawn to that's on now that you're like want to work with?

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 3 Well,

Speaker 3 I am a fan. And what's really exciting now is my older daughter, Alice, is 15.
And so we stay up and watch. together.
So that's fun to like be at that age with her where she's into it, you know? And

Speaker 3 yeah, I mean.

Speaker 2 Does she she go back and watch your episodes?

Speaker 1 No, no, no,

Speaker 3 do your kids want to watch your episodes?

Speaker 1 They don't give it up.

Speaker 2 My kids, my wife,

Speaker 2 no one thinks I'm doing anything but counting paper clips when I'm that's healthy though.

Speaker 3 That's healthy, I think. Yeah.

Speaker 3 And they watch everything. They watch like, she watched Parks and Rec? 100%.
Yeah. The Office, 100%.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Exactly.

Speaker 3 Exactly.

Speaker 3 So, yeah, I mean, I'm still a fan of Keenan. That's never going to change.
I think Chris Redd is super funny. Yeah, Chris Red.

Speaker 1 Chris Red, Chris Redd was on Will and Grace, and he was supposed to be a recurring character. And as they were trying to make his deal, he got a call like a week later.

Speaker 1 And like a week or two later, he's on Saturday Night Live. I was like, that's so crazy.
He just did like a couple episodes of Will and Grace.

Speaker 3 That is crazy.

Speaker 2 So, Tina, how do you manage being so

Speaker 2 great at

Speaker 2 what it is that you do and physically, like, how do you decide where to point your

Speaker 1 work?

Speaker 2 I mean, you can be, you can do so many different things, whether it's television or film or theater, musicals, on camera, behind camera.

Speaker 2 Like, I would imagine it would be somewhat burdensome to try to figure out what to prioritize.

Speaker 1 I mean,

Speaker 3 I think TV sort of where I'm most comfortable because I feel like it's the most interesting place right now. There's more interesting things happening in TV, especially for comedy.

Speaker 3 I feel like the movies is kind of glacially paced. And it's not that I don't want to do movies, but it also just feels like there's so many more chances for people to fuck it up in movies.

Speaker 1 Well, it takes seven years to make a movie. Yeah, it takes seven years and it takes seven years to shoot it.

Speaker 1 Don't you always find that like there's nothing more boring in a lot of ways than making a movie and being on a movie set?

Speaker 1 It's so slow and it's not conducive to that immediacy that you have when you're making a show when you've got to shoot nine pages in a day and you've got to get the scene and it's got, you've got to move, it's got to be quick.

Speaker 1 And that lends itself to being funnier rather than shooting one side of it for one day. And then you shoot like three-eighths of a page.

Speaker 1 That's the worst.

Speaker 1 And TV, you know, you did 30 rock. I mean, you guys would jam through the, you'd have those huge packed days with just like a million scenes and you just got to get it.

Speaker 3 Also, we all joke about like, remember when we used to make 22 episodes of things? That's like ridiculous now. Like everyone makes like three episodes

Speaker 3 and collects their awards.

Speaker 1 Don't you think those days are those days seem like they're over, don't you think?

Speaker 2 The 22 episode days?

Speaker 1 Yeah, or the 100 episodes of a show. Yeah.
I think so.

Speaker 2 What about writing books? Is that a good time

Speaker 2 pace for you, or is that somewhat glacial as well?

Speaker 3 I just did that the one time, and I remember I was like doing 30 Rock at the same time. I was doing, I think I started it.

Speaker 3 I remember I was on this set of date night with Steve Corell, and I just had like a notebook on this. I was like, yeah, I guess I said I would write this book.

Speaker 3 And then as short as as that book is, I felt like it near about killed me because, again, I don't work a single and I was so used to having a writer's room.

Speaker 3 And I was like, not so much that it was more work, but it was just so vulnerable. Of like, if this book comes out and people are like, boo,

Speaker 3 it's a hundred percent my fault. It's a hundred percent a rejection of me personally.
It's not a novel. It's just like, here's who, what my deal is.
And if people were like, boo,

Speaker 3 I've never felt so nervous about anything.

Speaker 1 I walk into like a grocery store and people go, boo. Sure.
Boo. Yeah.
But that's, that's just because they've seen your work. That's not because they've seen your work.
That's what I'm saying.

Speaker 1 Tina, let me tell us, yes, go ahead. Go ahead.

Speaker 3 Are you in like a

Speaker 3 old person's bathroom?

Speaker 1 What is that? By the way, you should know. You should know.
So this is my home booth. And these are actually handles for a bathtub.
No joke.

Speaker 1 Because usually when I record, when I record my real VOS, I'm standing up and I like to lean and hold on. So I had the guy get these and they are for

Speaker 1 somebody who needs help getting in and out of a tub. Okay.
Now,

Speaker 1 how much harder or what would you have to navigate to become, to do what you do today? If you were starting out and you were 22 today and trying to get into comedy, fuck,

Speaker 1 right?

Speaker 1 Well, you get

Speaker 1 advice, right? Like,

Speaker 1 not even advice, just like, what would you do to yourself? Like, how would you do it if you were graduating?

Speaker 1 I'm not necessarily saying, hey, to young writers out there, listen, I'm like, literally, what would you do?

Speaker 3 Yeah, that's a good question. What would I do? I probably would be trying to blow up on TikTok or something, right? I would be cutting out the middleman, which listen, it's worked well in porn.

Speaker 1 Sure. Who needs Hugh Hefner anymore, right?

Speaker 1 It seems like, I mean, unless I'm wrong, it seems like people on TikTok really want to be in television or film. And the people in television or film aren't making that money anymore.

Speaker 1 So they want to go blow up on TikTok. It's, it's,

Speaker 1 yeah. Don't you feel that way?

Speaker 3 Yeah. I think broadcast TV especially doesn't mean, like to my kids, that doesn't mean anything to them.
Like they don't, they don't understand what's happening.

Speaker 2 Is there still, I'm going to sound like a real old man here.

Speaker 2 Can you still like make a bunch of money on social media, like saying, I like this kind of chocolate. I

Speaker 1 say this kind of like

Speaker 1 right? That's a whole industry, right?

Speaker 3 I think so.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 2 Like taste,

Speaker 2 that's not what tastemakers are called, is it?

Speaker 1 Is that what

Speaker 2 influencers?

Speaker 1 Right.

Speaker 2 And like people have agents for that and stuff.

Speaker 3 Dude. I think so.

Speaker 1 Take yourself out back

Speaker 1 and just end it, man. This is fucking.
By the way, this is a great opportunity to mention. You said chocolate, Jason, for us to mention Reese's.

Speaker 1 Jason's been asking me to reach out to the people at Reese's because he wants free peanut butter cups.

Speaker 1 I just think he doesn't make any money over on the Ozarks.

Speaker 2 But I'm so sick and tired of hearing your dumb voice sell candy on TV. I'm like, if I got to listen to it, if I got to listen to it, then why don't you get me a free box of those

Speaker 2 peanut butter cups that are wrapped in peanut butter with the peanut butter inside? It's double, triple peanut butter, and I'm not sorry, whatever it is.

Speaker 2 I need some of that for free for having to listen to your crap.

Speaker 1 Great. Okay, I got it.
I wrote it down, and they're obviously listening right now. So thank you, everybody at Reese's.
And to Jason Bates.

Speaker 2 Should I give my address over the audience?

Speaker 1 Your

Speaker 1 Give your address. Number one, Deadline Hollywood Way.

Speaker 1 Tina, did you ever imagine it would be this amazing being on this podcast?

Speaker 3 I mean, I thought about it.

Speaker 2 Thought about saying no.

Speaker 1 And then...

Speaker 3 My tip on Reese's, though, you know, this is my tip on all candy. Sure.

Speaker 3 Whenever there's holiday candy, Where it's like the Reese's shape like Santa Claus, always buy that candy because it's fresher.

Speaker 1 Fresher and nice.

Speaker 3 Because they just made it. You could get a regular candy bar.

Speaker 1 That's a good one.

Speaker 3 It could have been in the CVS for seven months.

Speaker 2 Really good point.

Speaker 1 We often ask this question of people who are in the public eye, who have children. Would you, do your kids want to do what mom and or dad does, or do you, would you discourage them from getting it?

Speaker 1 Or you just say, follow your dreams and I'll support you?

Speaker 3 It's funny you should ask that. Our older daughter, you know, I think if anything, maybe would be interested in directing.
I think she would be horrified to perform.

Speaker 3 And I never like, when she was a little kid i think all little kids think they want to and i think i let her be it i think she was in some still photographs alice she played young liz lemon but in a series of photographs at the end of the end and end of 30 rock

Speaker 3 and um and that was like that's enough like let's keep it measured and then this other one that you that's you now know what i'm dealing with um during the pandemic it came up we were for girls 5 eva we had to cast a kid to play Busy Phillips and Andrew Rannel's child, who was like a little YouTube villain.

Speaker 3 And I had always said about that one. I was like, you know what? That's a Nellie.
I got a Nellie Olson right here.

Speaker 1 Jason knows Nelly. I know.

Speaker 1 Small world. She became a stand-up.
Believe me.

Speaker 3 She really. I loved her.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I remember like she became a stand-up for a while, right?

Speaker 2 I want to say Allison Angram.

Speaker 1 Is that her? Dude, if you don't know. Oh my God.
Allison Arngram. Did I said it right? Allison Arngram.
Yeah. Yeah.
There you go.

Speaker 3 Anyway, so I let her audition for this part because it was sort of like...

Speaker 2 Wait, you made your daughter read?

Speaker 1 Of course.

Speaker 1 I made her read.

Speaker 3 Yeah, because I thought that was going to be the end of it. And then her audition was pretty good.

Speaker 2 I thought I was the bad parent on this.

Speaker 3 Oh, it was going to get worse. And then

Speaker 3 we auditioned and then, you know, she did pretty well. And then there was another kid who was like an actual experienced kid.

Speaker 3 And we're like, well, this, and I'm, I was like, this will be good for her.

Speaker 3 She, she you know we've hired the kid with more experience and then and so I had to tell her like well you did really well and I was making it up I was like you're in you were in the top three

Speaker 3 and but you know we had and then she was like basically was like I didn't book it and I was like you didn't book it well I was like you're half TFA and that bitch never booked anything and so I was like you didn't book it but then because it was the pandemic this other poor kid uh they were like well she can work as a local hire but she's in Michigan right now and the quarantine it fell apart and so then I was like, back up.

Speaker 1 All right, homegirl, you're up.

Speaker 3 So she's in it. And now we're faced.
Now, and it was at the time, it was like, you get to leave the house and get a test and work during quarantine. And I will say she was incredibly professional.

Speaker 3 I said she was like a little bit like mommy. She was like very prepared and a little dead-eyed.

Speaker 3 You've all acted with me.

Speaker 1 That's what it is. But she was good.
And a little dead-eyed.

Speaker 3 Oh, my God. If she hears a clip of that, she'll murder me.

Speaker 1 So listen, Tina, I'm kind of obsessed with horrible theater stories and theater stories gone wrong. I have so many.

Speaker 1 Do you have like a favorite of like a play you were in or at Second City or something?

Speaker 3 Oh, a favorite theater horror story? I do have a pretty good theater horror story. This from high school theater.

Speaker 3 Yes. So, okay, in my high school, I played Van Helsing and Dracula because

Speaker 1 feminism. Did you borrow Paula's Grace Bray? I probably did.
Nice callback.

Speaker 3 Nice callback.

Speaker 3 And so, okay, so let me think about this. So I was Van Helsing and Dracula, and

Speaker 3 we did like a total of two performances, and everything went wrong. And I got to remember this story.
Like, the first thing that kind of went wrong would be like our theater was

Speaker 3 a thrust stage, and the seats went up.

Speaker 3 Is that Arvina? So, like, tiered. Tiered.
Yeah, like, so the stage was on the ground, and the audience was up. And we had like a rubber bat on a very long string.

Speaker 3 Like, scene one, the bat's supposed to fly by, the bat gets stuck. It's just dangling on the stage the rest of the night.

Speaker 1 We're like, oh, that's so good.

Speaker 3 Then

Speaker 3 I give some big speech. There's this guy, Harker says to me, like, Professor, what is a vampire? And I give a speech, like, I give like a page and a half speech of what is a vampire.

Speaker 3 And this kid was just like not listening. So he goes, what is a vampire? And I give the whole speech.
And at the end of it, he looks at me and goes, but professor, what is a vampire?

Speaker 1 Gave me this

Speaker 3 same cue again. Then the kid who played Dracula was this kid, John Doyle, Doyle, who was like

Speaker 3 very like Bon Jovi-based. Like his personality was Bon Jovi-based.
Beautiful hair. Rocker hair, beautiful hair.
His mom was a hairdresser, and his mom was also a professional Angelian impersonator.

Speaker 3 Side story.

Speaker 1 Anyway, Angelian. Let's get back.
We'll double back to that. We'll double back.

Speaker 3 And so John, you know, because he was like, he was like, oh, he takes rock singing lessons in New York. Like, he was a cool guy.
He was not an athlete.

Speaker 3 And so there's a scene where there's a mirror and Dracula like sees the mirror and he's supposed to throw this like chalice or something and smash the mirror and so John being like not an athlete and in this open arena like I go a mirror and then he like throws the thing misses the mirror entirely so then I'm like trying to improvise like what am I supposed to say and then a full like 20 seconds later a little techie kid comes out like in full view of the audience with a hammer from behind and smashes the mirror

Speaker 3 oh at one point also then the set caught on fire a little bit

Speaker 3 there was like a little flash pot and the fake rocks of the castle were foam and started to catch on fire.

Speaker 3 And then my dad, who was, had been a fireman and does not, did not fuck around, he stood up and he was like, fire!

Speaker 1 And we were like, okay, like he stood up in the audience and you know, this is like all act one. And then

Speaker 3 put the fire out.

Speaker 1 We continued.

Speaker 3 It's a longer story than you want to. And then.

Speaker 3 Again, the techies, like there's a part where like there's a techie just like in a bay window, just like in full view of the audience with a fog machine, just being like, knowing he's just like a total hero.

Speaker 3 And then the end of the whole thing ended with like Van Helsing kills Dracula with a spike through the heart. And it was, and I'm down, and I'm like acting so hard, and I'm doing this whole speech.

Speaker 3 And then I just hear laughter, and I was like, This can't be good. This is the end of the whole thing.

Speaker 3 Because, again, the stage flat audience here, I was like lightning flashing, I'm killing the vampire. And I look up, and just a toddler has wandered onto the stage

Speaker 1 toward me.

Speaker 3 And that's how not scary it was.

Speaker 1 A toddler

Speaker 1 joined us.

Speaker 1 That's my story.

Speaker 1 That's hilarious.

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Speaker 1 By the way, you mentioned your dad. I always think about this.
I met your parents a couple times, but I remember your dad, I remember going to your wedding, and we had only met a couple of times.

Speaker 1 Going to your wedding, your dad described me as...

Speaker 3 He's like, that guy's Brooks brothers handsome, right?

Speaker 1 He said he, no, he's an arrow shirt. Do you remember that?

Speaker 3 Yeah, my dad was very taken with Willie. He's like, oh, God, that guy, that guy looks like an arrow shirt model.

Speaker 1 But it was very specific. Do you remember Arrow shirts?

Speaker 1 No, I don't. Like in the Sears catalog, like, that guy's an arrow shirt.
And I was like, dude, he made them

Speaker 2 for thick dudes.

Speaker 1 Is that what they was it special for? Excuse me? Nothing?

Speaker 3 Oh, no, Will was thin then. He was really thin then.

Speaker 1 I was thin then. I don't believe it.

Speaker 1 Tina, because of your theater background, would you ever want to do multicam? Now, for the audience, the difference between multicam and single cam is single cam, there's no audience.

Speaker 1 Multicam, there's a live studio audience. That's when you hear laughing, like cheers, and Will and Grace and friends and Seinfeld and all those.
Would you ever want to do a multicam?

Speaker 1 It seems like you'd be perfect for that.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I do think it would be so fun. I feel like in some ways it's hard to.

Speaker 3 Will and Grace was one of the last ones, especially on NBC, they don't really do them so much anymore. And I also have reached an age where I can't really be photographed from the waist down.

Speaker 1 No, not true.

Speaker 1 Not true.

Speaker 3 So like, but I do think it would be fun.

Speaker 1 But wouldn't it be great to hear all that laughter through through the masks?

Speaker 1 No, but or if you don't want to be in one, just like create one and write one. I think you'd be so amazing.
Are you saying that you want Tina to create a multi-cam for you? No.

Speaker 2 What about hosting a talk show? Would you ever do that, Tina? It seems to me like you'd be fantastic at that.

Speaker 3 Oh, thank you. I thought, I don't know if I, I think I'm very shy.
I think to me, it sounds super stressful. I've never wanted to pursue that.

Speaker 2 I'm really shy, too.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we can tell. I am.

Speaker 2 I don't like being the center of attention.

Speaker 3 Well, and also at those kind of late night talk shows, like, that's a grind.

Speaker 1 That's like, but you, I remember when you were doing 30 Rock, I mean, you came off SNL, which was a grind because you were a head writer and you were doing update, and it was a lot, a lot, a lot, and especially leading right up till you know, 2008 and everything that was going on.

Speaker 1 But I was sorry, you were already doing 30 Rock at that point, but you were doing so much.

Speaker 1 Then you go to 30 Rock and it just kind of amps it up even more because you're showrunning 30 Rock and you're writing it all and then you're starring in it as well and having 16 hour days.

Speaker 1 so you're not pulling all-nighters every night but you are going 18 hours or 17 hours a day like yeah that was fucking really rough right for many years in there it was insane first of all also if you hear weird breathing sounds it's the dog it's not me listener she now has her dog her white what is it a cock poodle he's just a straight poo is a poodle straight poo um yeah looking back i didn't mean to say that you looked tired in those years i just meant to say more that i know that you were very exhausted.

Speaker 1 You talked about it. Like you were like getting crushed.

Speaker 3 It was insane. What we did, I don't know.
We were just, I was, what, 35 and had some juice left and doing 22 episodes. And also my baby, Alice, was one when we started.
And it was crazy. It was crazy.

Speaker 3 Like, I look, I look back and shudder at just what we, yeah.

Speaker 2 Did you enjoy the shutdown and the pandemic to kind of recharge a little bit? Or did you stay super duper busy?

Speaker 1 i wouldn't say i enjoyed it i mean like yeah one it's always one of those things where if you're like oh i'm lucky enough that nobody in my family died so i it's okay then just quietly say like it was nice that we were together well i guess what i meant is enjoyed the the period that you could not work yeah you know yeah yeah nice right yeah it's kind of nice i think like i would i'm i'm ready to retire guys i'm ready to i've been me too by the way i was saying the same thing and i was saying i was talking about it with with certainly with amy too she's been feeling the same way which is just that feeling of like, oh, my God, you know, much like you kind of did the same thing, had, you know, had Archie went right into Parks and Wreck.

Speaker 1 Yeah. And those first few, when you have

Speaker 1 both your girls have those like little babies and you're working those insane hours on those shows, it's crushing. It's like...

Speaker 1 It's soul crushing because you're not at home as much as you want to be and you've got little kids and you're trying to fuck balance it all. It just.

Speaker 3 Right. And it's all, you know, nothing compared to someone who's doing all those same work hours on a job that they hate that doesn't pay well.

Speaker 1 No, no, no. Of course, it's the same as being a working parent on any job.

Speaker 1 But like, just in the sense that like of any working parent, especially working mom who's working any job that's taking them long stretches, whatever it is. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And of course, there are a lot of people who could say, well, you get paid really well. Like, okay, sure.
But like, you're still working all those hours. Yeah.
And it's, and it's tough, you know.

Speaker 3 And it's hard to, once you get to stop, it's hard to go back.

Speaker 1 Like, I've worked on a couple things I did a little small part on this show that Steve Martin and Marty Short have and was that thing of like and your pickup is 5'10 and you're like oh yeah that used to be every day yeah especially for ladies because the paired makeup people have really gotten used to working at home too right and in in any occupation I wonder how that's gonna all transition back I think I know I do like to go to an office I like it right but five days a week or would it be great like just two days a week three days a week I feel like that's gonna be the transition sean you'd like going to the office too i do i i prefer like the old man nine to five kind of one place one-stop shop jason likes that too i like a routine jason likes that too we had this little company a couple years ago we had this shared office and he'd always be like you dick we've got this off and you're never in here and i go well yeah my dad worked his ass off for 40 50 years I don't want to have to do that.

Speaker 1 Why do you think I do what we do so that I can not go to an office? So, you know what I did?

Speaker 1 I found a portrait of of myself and I put it behind my desk so he could look at me even when I wasn't there. That's a true story.

Speaker 2 That really was counting paper clips at that place.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it really was. Yeah.
So, Tina, like you joke about retiring, but of course, you're never going to want to stop writing and you're never going to want to stop doing that kind of thing.

Speaker 1 Oh, really? No, come on.

Speaker 1 So, wait, Tina, what would you do, though? What is, is there anything like picture the girls are grown and out and it's you and Jeff and you're at home and what you still would be writing?

Speaker 1 Or is there something that you'd want to be doing?

Speaker 3 I wonder. I so wonder.
It's like that thing of you, you know, the improv training, right? You go back to it, and it's like, when do you enter a scene?

Speaker 3 This is the trick, the thing that trips people up. Does anyone

Speaker 3 remember like when are you supposed to enter a scene? And the answer is when you're needed. It's the only time you're supposed to enter.
You're not supposed to enter because you have a funny idea.

Speaker 3 You're not supposed to enter because it's going well and you want a piece of it.

Speaker 2 What about the notion of like you and Jeff just doing just globetrotting and having some wander lust? And once you guys become empty nesters, just start traveling the world and knocking down

Speaker 2 and getting all cultured. Is that something that's appealing to you? Or are you as soft as I am and you need CNN and thread count?

Speaker 3 Oh, yeah. I want to see a couple places, but I don't need to see everywhere.

Speaker 3 I know I'm increasingly just a homebody.

Speaker 3 I know, you know what I wish one of us should write is like, Someone should try to be Neil Simon, right? Like someone should write a play.

Speaker 2 I nominate you.

Speaker 3 As if that's easy easy to do.

Speaker 1 That's right.

Speaker 3 But like to write a comedy, a hard comedy, because I'll tell you what, I go to these Broadway plays and what passes for a joke, Sean, right? It's like mentioning Brooklyn is a joke. Just the word.

Speaker 1 And you have to do it out. You have to play it out.
Brooklyn.

Speaker 2 What about the films that Neil Simon, they adapted and became great, you know, like California Sweet.

Speaker 3 Yeah, California Sweet. Goodbye Girl is one I like.

Speaker 2 And the Blake Edwards stuff. I mean, what about those? Those big commercial films, I mean, someone's got to write them, Tina.
They don't write themselves.

Speaker 1 Nobody goes to that shit.

Speaker 3 I don't think they make comedy films anymore. They make like...

Speaker 2 We'd put them on Netflix. Let's do that.

Speaker 1 Yeah. I don't know, man.

Speaker 1 I saw some poll online today. It was like, if you could only live with three of these film franchises, which one would it be? And it was like, Marvel,

Speaker 1 Star Wars, like Harry, you know, Harry Potter, like all the. And I was like, wait, that's what it's become? That's it?

Speaker 1 Those are the films. Fuck that, man.
Yeah. And none, and nobody's funny.

Speaker 1 This is crazy. I can't wait for the letters and the comments.
Oh, nobody's funny anymore. Wait a minute.
Yeah, okay. Yeah, you're hilarious.

Speaker 1 I love it. Bring it on.
No, you're not saying that.

Speaker 2 You're saying that comedies are not in the theaters anymore, really.

Speaker 1 Yes, that's what I'm saying. Nobody's making comedy films.

Speaker 3 No one's going to make, you know, the in-laws now, the original in-laws.

Speaker 1 No one's going to make. No.
Nobody's making, you can't make Rushmore today. Nobody's making Rushmore.

Speaker 3 You'd make it for Netflix, I guess.

Speaker 2 But I'm fine watching it at home on my couch. I don't need to drive to a theater to see that, right? I mean, I go to a theater to see some big, huge format, right? A big IMAX thing or something.

Speaker 1 You come ask them. Is that Penelope?

Speaker 3 What's your question? How much longer?

Speaker 1 Okay, we're almost done. Sorry, we're almost done.
Wrap it up now. We're going to wrap it up now.

Speaker 2 Your agent looks real young.

Speaker 1 Yeah,

Speaker 2 we are past our hour here.

Speaker 1 I know. We've been taking up way too much of your time.
I'm sorry that we're keeping you from the fact because I want to keep you on.

Speaker 1 I just want your opinion on everything. I feel like anytime I get your opinion, it feels like it's really the right one.
Yeah, so that's why we've been keeping you around.

Speaker 3 Opinions are all I have anymore.

Speaker 1 Go. No, it's so good.

Speaker 2 We're going to dismiss you, but we're going to reserve the right to call you back with any questions we have.

Speaker 1 That's right. Anytime, guys.
Oh, you're the best. Thank you so much for taking your time to do this.
I love you, Tina.

Speaker 1 You're the best.

Speaker 3 I love all three of you.

Speaker 2 Love you, Tina. Go have fun with the rest of your day with that sweet girl.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay, we're going to go be in. All right, mom.
Love you, Tina.

Speaker 1 Thank you. Thanks, Tina.
Bye-bye. Bye, buddies.

Speaker 2 Boy, just another.

Speaker 1 She wanted to get off there at the end.

Speaker 2 Yeah, do you think she gave a cue to Penelope to come in and say, okay, now this is the time where I need you to. No,

Speaker 1 she'd had a

Speaker 1 lot of fun. Everybody knows who she is.
Everyone knows how brilliant she is. Everybody knows, everybody's a fan.
It seems like that's the one person everybody can agree on, right?

Speaker 1 That's, oh my God, she's.

Speaker 2 I would like to find the person that doesn't like Tina Faye. Like, who, who, who, yeah, who's who's that person?

Speaker 1 How could you possibly not? Yeah. I know she's the most, she's just so freaking funny.
She's such an unbelievable writer and a great joke writer. I mean, just the funniest.

Speaker 2 She doesn't take herself or anything too seriously.

Speaker 1 She always has the funniest joke on everything.

Speaker 1 It's scary. It's intimidating.
Yeah, she's.

Speaker 1 It must be for someone, you know, for you guys.

Speaker 2 A great leader. Seems like a great leader.

Speaker 1 Incredible leader. I'm very drawn to her.
It was great. Sean, you were on 30 Rock a few times or once? Just once, that finale of that first season.

Speaker 2 Just once. Well, you were on it a bunch of times, weren't you?

Speaker 1 I guess. Well, that's what the four Emmy nominations tell me.

Speaker 1 Wait, what? Come on. It doesn't matter.
It doesn't matter. Wait a second.
Is that true? Is that true?

Speaker 2 Honestly, were you on for four seasons?

Speaker 1 But did you get nominated? Four times, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 Congratulations. Yeah, four.
Congratulations.

Speaker 2 Wait, so guess, so, so you do, did you did four episodes? You got nominated for all four of them?

Speaker 1 No, I did more than four episodes. I did a bunch.
I did, like, the first season I did

Speaker 1 one or two. It was not their first season.
It was like. So do you want me to do an impression of your mom? Really quick? Yeah, go ahead.
Yeah. Well, it would have been more impressive if you won.

Speaker 1 That's true. That's very true she'd be much more impressed if I had won yeah

Speaker 1 um god I uh she's listening

Speaker 1 no we can keep it my you know the first time Jason you know this story the first we were coming back the arrested development had won the comedy uh the emmy for best comedy in uh 2004 or whatever that was and the next day

Speaker 1 uh it was that was a sunday night the next monday we had to be at work early you and i were in that scene remember we had the emmy those guys chuck martin brought his on set we were so excited that we won improbably, because we were such a low-rated show.

Speaker 1 And I'm driving to the Fox lot from Venice, and my mom calls, and I believe, it was like 6 a.m. LA time, and I've been up until three because we're so excited.
I was like, oh, my God.

Speaker 1 Did you watch, did you see the Emmys last night? No, we won. And she goes, I did.

Speaker 1 Now, your sister is going through, and then just completely.

Speaker 1 I was like, okay. It was a very sort of Canadian, like the whole idea is always like, don't get too big for yourself.
Right.

Speaker 1 You know, and don't like, oh, you think that you're better than anybody else? Like, I guess I don't. I'm sorry.
I don't. I think I'm worse.
And like, there we go. That's more like it.

Speaker 1 You know, the idea, have you ever heard the story about the two lobster fishermen, one Canadian and one American, are walking down the road?

Speaker 1 And the American lobster fisherman says to the Canadian, he says,

Speaker 1 I noticed that you don't have a lid on the on your lobster pot there, Boy. Aren't you worried that your lobster is going to get out? And the Canadian says, no, these are Canadian lobsters.

Speaker 1 If one of them tries to get out, the other ones will pull them back down.

Speaker 2 that's canada oh lord that's canada that's what i grew up in oh bless and i love canada i love it to death and uh i grew up like that too it's a very there's a very sort of anyway i don't know speaking of speaking of canada uh have you given any uh thoughts i imagine you're gonna book the guest uh for our for our toronto stop for our for our tour our our tour which listener uh it does look like it's firming up it does look like we're gonna we're gonna actually do this and we're gonna go to a few cities.

Speaker 1 Just inside the new year.

Speaker 2 Just inside the new year.

Speaker 1 2022. And we're starting the tour in Toronto.

Speaker 2 Is that right, eh?

Speaker 1 We can say that, yeah.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 And then some New York and some Boston, some Chicago, some Madison, some L.A.

Speaker 1 Is that right? I think that's right, yeah.

Speaker 2 So who would we look?

Speaker 2 Will you try to?

Speaker 1 I have a couple people in mind that I want to have for Toronto. You know, I know that Chicago.

Speaker 2 We should start taking suggestions for guests.

Speaker 1 Yeah. We should.
That's a good idea. Just saying the expression tap lincoln bio, does that mean anything?

Speaker 2 Tap link in bio? What is that? Who's link in bio?

Speaker 1 That's what you say on like Instagram.

Speaker 1 Oh. Tap link in bio.
Oh, tap link in bio. You know what else they say sometimes on Instagram? No, don't.

Speaker 2 Don't you do it. Not yet.

Speaker 1 We're still talking. We're still talking.
Jesus fucking Christ. Are you going to be able to do it?

Speaker 2 He gets so excited when he figures out a pie.

Speaker 1 I know it would have been perfect, but we have a few more things that we need to do about the tour to talk about. Okay.
Because the tour is becoming a reality. Yes.

Speaker 1 Sean, do you have a person in mind for Chicago? I do. I have several, but I don't want to say them out loud.
Yeah, don't say them out loud yet.

Speaker 2 Yeah, how are we going to decide who's booking what cities?

Speaker 1 Well, why don't we? Well, we have to do dibs, and I want to do dibs. You ready? Toronto and Wisconsin.

Speaker 1 Oh, you want Madison. You're going to take

Speaker 1 it. Even though it's my sister.

Speaker 2 Wait, but are we going to Madison strictly to see Sean's niece, nephew?

Speaker 1 My sister.

Speaker 1 Your sister.

Speaker 1 And how could Tracy be his nephew, man?

Speaker 2 I've met a couple of Tracy dudes.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I do too. Yeah, I have too.
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 But these guests need to be sort of germane to the location, yes?

Speaker 1 That's right. That's right.
That's the whole idea is we're going to have guests who are germane, hopefully like a very sort of organic, not shoehorned-in pick.

Speaker 1 So think about it. I think that what we got to do is, though, we got to make sure.

Speaker 1 Here it goes.

Speaker 1 For the tour, though, if you want to talk about the tour,

Speaker 1 I'm not saying that there's rules. I'm not saying that there are rules to this.
I'm just saying that you have to check the bailos.

Speaker 1 It's so bad.

Speaker 1 Okay, goodbye.

Speaker 1 Smart.

Speaker 1 Smart.

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Speaker 4 You'll get support from people who care about your success, like your enrollment specialist who gets to know you and the goals you'd like to achieve.

Speaker 4 You'll also get a designated academic coach who's with you throughout your entire program. Plus, career coaches are available to help you navigate your professional goals.

Speaker 4 A different future is closer than you think with Capella University. Learn more at capella.edu.