"Brad Paisley"

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Subject to change. Hey guys, I'm Sean Hayes here with Jason Bateman and Will Arnett, and we do a show called Smart List, and one of us brings on a guest that the other two don't know about, and it's a surprise.
Are you late for something? Honestly. What's wrong? I'm telling people who haven't heard the show.

People have just turned it off hearing that.

All right.

And by the way, why do we need that people know what they have just clicked on?

We don't need to repeat.

Some people don't know what they're clicking on, man.

Can you imagine how drunk some people must be?

Well, that's true.

They're loaded.

They've had a couple and they're like, and they hit it by mistake.

They butt dialed the podcast.

Well, they better not throw up on our faces. You're listening to Smartless.
Yeah, don't throw up. Smart.
Smart. Smart.
Smart. Smart.
Smart. Guys, I feel like we're stretched out real good right now.
I'm feeling, I'm ready for the game. Wait, Will, Will, what are you really doing? I was just looking up some stuff.
I just, you know, I'm just, I'm getting ready to go. Oh, it's your guest.
Right, right, right. He's prepping.
It's my guest. This is prepping on our time.
Sorry. No, here's the thing.
It's like, how do you, how do you... Save it for the guest.
Save it for. Save it for the guests.
How do you introduce when you're thinking about somebody? He's like, you want to think about what's the best way to introduce them? What's the best way to do them justice and to honor... It's all stuff that should have happened about an hour ago at the latest.
No. Well, I tell you what.
In lieu of... Wait, how do you say it? L-I-E-U.
In lieu. In lieu.
Uh-oh. Here comes the French.
En lieu. By the way, you know, I had a dream last night that I was speaking full French.
And somebody said, the worst part of it is this. Before you roll your eyes, get ready to roll your eyes at this part.
I was in a room full of people. There was somebody there.
I spoke French to them. And the other people said, oh, you speak French? And I went, oh, yeah, I'm kind of fluent in French.
It was the, even I was disgusted by my own reaction in the dream. Say even I was disgusted by my own reaction in my dream in French.
Moi-même, c'était dégoûtant moi-même, hein? Wow. Alors.
So listen. Sounds like a real hockey player.
Yeah. This guest that we have on, on this.
Are we doing this right now? Are we in our podcast right now? Yeah, we're on the show. This is the show.
We're already in the podcast. That's what's so great about the podcast space, as somebody told me it's called, is that we're always in it.
The second, we're just, we're in it. It's a space.
We're in it. It's just so conversational, right, Will? I know, it is.
It's just like you and I, we're just talking.

Sean's, we're like on a party line, right? Yeah. Remember when we were kids? Sure.
Shut up. 1-800-202-0202 is the party line.
Just bring in the guest already. This person is a, this person is an American icon, an American institution in their own right.
This person has 14 number one hits. What? 14.
Yeah. Billboard hits.
This person is a writer. This person is a singer.
This person is a performer. This person is sneaky hilarious.
This person is... Mr.
Brad Paisley. Brad Paisley.
There he is. Sean.
Brad Paisley, my mafia friend. Hello, Brad.
Jason, I've always wanted to hang with you and talk Dodgers, so I'm hoping that's what we can do today. This is starting off great.
This is great. Guys, you can go ahead and shut down.
Have you two never been to a baseball game together? Well, we've been there at the same time, but we didn't actually drive in the same car or anything. How often do you go there? How many games do you get to? I probably get to 15 or 20 a year.
Wow, why don't we carpool or something? Let's go. Get snacks together.
That's great. I'm a decent guy.
Yeah, let's do it. Will, tell him.
Sean. You know what? I tell you, Brad, it's great to see you, by the way.
Thank you so much for coming on here. Yeah, whatever, Will.
So Sean and I. Wait, Will and Jason, do you know that Brad and I play this Zoom Mafia game with a bunch of people like once, twice a week, every week.
Come on.

There's Zoom games?

Oh, it's fun.

There's Zoom Mafia.

It's a lot of fun.

Okay,

who else is in the Zoom Mafia?

Now I want to know.

We haven't really talked about this.

It's kind of a circle

of trust thing.

Are we allowed to talk about it?

Oh, maybe we're not.

How about initials?

And then we can guess.

Well, we can cut it.

We can cut it.

If we have regrets,

we can cut it.

Well,

it's a lot of the groundlings.

Uh-oh.

My wife's in it, but, you know's a lot of the groundlings oh my wife's in it um but you know um a lot of the a lot of the groundlings and and it's uh it's a lot of fun it's actually something we tried when this began because we we were doing these games uh at kevin neil and kevin and susan neil's house um in person and having a ball and then we had this idea it's like well maybe it'll work actually does. Yeah, it's super fun.
Is Sean any good at it, Brad? And I know you'll be honest. No.
Do you have to talk like a mafia person? Yeah, you just slick back your hair, Chase, and you talk like you did when you were 10. Jason, now you've played a mafia.
You played a dock worker in Philly before, right? What was his name? Yeah, that was, I believe it was called Philly Boy. Can you give us a little bit of that? Can you give us a little bit? Ah, boy, it's been so long.
Because, you know, there is a difference between a New York accent and a Philly accent. I'm not sure you know that.
Can't wait to hear the difference. What's the difference? Show us.
I don't know what that difference is, but that's what I was being screamed at while I was doing the movie because I was missing it. You feel like after all these years that maybe you forgot about it? Oh, God.
Wow. Where you going? Drop that pallet over here.
Just put it down. Drive your forklift down.
That's actually really good, Jason. Guys, I think we just lost our listener.
No. Well, what I was going to say was, first, just getting back to the baseball.
Brad, you have to understand, the first time I went to a Dodger game with Jason, I was really excited because he's a big Dodger fan. This is such a terrible story, meaning it's hurtful.
It's not hurtful, first of all. Well, to me it was.
I'll never forget it. It was my worst nightmare.
It's not the first one. The first game is not what you think it is.
I'll tell that. The real thing, the story here was we get to the game, Park's in his spot, and Jason opens up the glove box, and there he's got two little sort of old-school transistor radios with one earpiece, and he hands one to me.
And I go, what's this? He goes, yeah, we listened to the game the whole time. I go, oh, yeah, yeah, there's not a lot of talking.
So we get to the game, the whole experience, and he puts his radio in, and he's just zoned out. He's watching the game.
I'm like, we're going to a baseball game with a guy, and now we're not even, there's no chit-chat. Maybe the seventh inning, like, hey, you want to get some meat? Yeah, we're not going to sit there and visit for three hours.
I'll bet you he doesn't do that with other people. There's a good chance.
I'd never do that to you, Brad, ever. No, we would have meaningful discussions during the game.
Sure we would. We'd get there early, right? We'd stay late.
We'd help them clean up. Absolutely.
This is so hostile, this environment. But the next, one of the other times I've been with, we've been a few times.
One time I went, Jason had a, he used to take his glove with him to catch the odd foul ball. You've got to stay ready.
And we, during the seventh inning, he kind of put it on the seat between us. I picked up the mitt, and we were just absentmindedly and just chit-chatting.
The game starts. At this point, we were chit-chatting, full disclosure.
And Dave Roberts, who at the time was playing for the Dodgers, hits a foul ball. And we both stand.
It's coming towards us and it's coming right towards Jason, right towards him. And at the last second, I reach in front of him with his own glove and snag the foul ball.
You caught a foul ball? I caught it in front of Jason's hands. He's got the glove for one batter.
I've got it for one batter and I snag it. And then I'm up on the jumbotron like, you know, like like you hear about heroes all the time but this is a real hero sure and and then I look and everybody's like yeah and I look at Jason's face I looked at him and he's so sunken and sad and upset usually the person you're standing next to after you catch a foul ball has got nothing but high fives loaded for you.
And I just couldn't have been sadder. The disappointment oozing from his body.
I understand. You took the ball.
You handed me the mitt back. I did.
I still got the ball. And I think you said, are you good to go? I think you were ready to leave, right? He was confused how long the third period was going to last.
Yeah. We can camp it up.
Yeah. He wanted to get out of there.
You know. Anyway, so that's what you got to look forward to, Brad.
I'm excited for you. We'll have fun.
Yeah, we will. I think it'll be great.
And we'll do lots of talking. Brad, can you tell us, because by the way, I was going to probably see you.
I'm not going to see you tonight, but I'm not going to see you. You're not going to be there tonight? No, I can't.
How are you guys all friends? How do you guys know Brad Paisley, for God's sakes? Where have I been? What's wrong with my phone number, you dicks? We'll exchange and we're done, and then it'll be great. You can be part of this magic.
But it's my job to make them jealous for the next year or so. We're just you and I.
You're moving in. Yeah, we're going to be, like, dressing in blue and white the whole time.
Face painting each other. You guys, go start without me.
I'll catch up. But listen.
How how do you guys know each other sean and i are through our friends that we do mafia with and then will and i oh sorry don't send anything will's way because uh chunk's got something in his mouth hey man can you wait till we're done doing the podcast before you start snacking are we on a break i gotta stay fueled up man you have any idea what i'm doing over a physical? Yeah, it's obvious what you're doing. You're tanning bed and you're like.
Yeah, look at you. Sure.
My tanning bed is called Planet Earth, Brad. Crossfit and tanning bed at this point.
It's unbelievable. Get a job.
Most people would wear a darker color, but Will's got bright white to show off the tan. Yeah, makes a tan pop.
I knew. When I was putting this shirt on, because I didn't have a shirt on for most of the day um guys here we go with i thought i am running there i am really leaving myself open and then i thought you know what fuck it let them take their shots you know i'm gonna let them punch themselves out and then i'm gonna come back to them wait a minute i have to jump in here okay uh brad i saw.
It was amazing. Thank you.
And will you tell people how that came together and what you did? And by the way, the speech that you gave when you were playing the guitar to all the kids. It was just so moving and inspiring.
This was one of the graduation shows? No. Actually, what this was was Bud Light sponsored us to set our whole, basically we set our whole tour up,

an entire arena show, 60-foot video wall,

and then spent three days setting it up,

everybody wearing masks until the show started.

All the band members had to be 10 feet apart,

and we did our show live via YouTube and Facebook,

and Bud Light paid for it, and it was really neat

because it was like, the only strange part is in between every song. like we had our lights, we had our video wall, we had everything.
But in between each song, there was no applause, obviously. Every now and then I would like browbeat my sound guy.
Welcome to Will's world. Yeah, right.
And Bud Light paid for it in Bud Light, right? They paid for it in Bud Light. They've been doing that for many tours that way way so when you usually would say like detroit you know between you what do you scream is it youtube youtube that'll work you can also you know internet you can go internet digital so what's that like so you're you're at a you're at a full-blown stadium arena or whatever and you're literally looking out to an empty empty house.
I would imagine it'd be like a reoccurring nightmare for you. But it was shot so beautifully.
It looked so cool. Plenty of room for camera moves out there, you know? Yeah, we had a drone flying around it.
Sure, I'll bet you did. Because you can't do that with an audience.
Yeah, no risk. No, there's no crash and hit anybody.
Well, it could, I guess. But it was really weird because it was normal in the middle of the show and the spotlight's on and the lights are doing their thing and then you kind of forget about the audience anyway half the time when you're playing in the middle of a song.
And then after the song, it's like, well, we suck. Yeah, of course.
Nobody cared. It was just so dead silent.
No, it's not how it was viewed at all. I mean, it was...
So, Brad, you do this huge concert that's put out over the internet internet it's massive and it's weird because you're doing it in front of this you know no audience and stuff and that sensation how weird that is take us back to your first tour what was that what where was it what was that how'd that come together that was really interesting because um when you're new you do everything free so because you don have an audience. So I had a struggling first single that took 37 weeks to get to number 12 on the Billboard chart.
First single, it was a good song, but you know how it is. It was, we were begging and borrowing and stealing every bit of airplay we could get.
But my second single ended up changing everything. And it was my first number one song.
It was actually the first, like there, it was kind of a tight ship at that time in country music. They weren't letting anybody new in.
And it was the first number one single from a new artist in like five or six years. Um, and it was called, he didn't have to be.
And it was written about my best friend who's a stepfather. And it was written about a dad who is the dad he doesn't have to be and anyway it it just generated so much and i ended up winning awards for that and getting nominated for a lot of things and that changed everything and what what year was that about it went number one in 19 it came out in 1999 i think it went number one in like january of 2000 so you know 20 years ago and but that first tour it's like i had here's what's crazy i have the same band today that's that i had then from that first tour yeah same six guys are with me that's so great and um we've been through it all i mean when my when i met kim my wife uh she came out road with us, and we had to kick somebody out of their bunk because it was a 12-bunk bus, and we had 12 people on it.
12 bunks were taken, so she ended up getting, like, the keyboard player's bunk, and he had to sleep on the couch in the front of the bunk. That was that first tour when she came out.
And then she remembers when we got our trailer that you could pull behind the bus with gear in it. We weren't renting things anymore.
And that was huge. So that's kind of nice that she saw us go from that.
Brad, I toured with Kenny Rogers. Yes, you're hearing that correctly.
How? Doing what? What were you doing with him? I was a Christmas elf, and it was his Christmas.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

Okay.

And it was his Christmas tour, and I slept on those buses too, and I hated it.

I don't understand how you can do that for 20 years.

I mean, do you don't mind being on the road and living in those quarters on those buses?

It was just...

We do a different...

See, Nashville's so centrally located, we don't have to go six months.

Oh, okay, okay. It's like leave Thursday night have to go six months.
Oh, okay, okay.

It's like leave Thursday night, be home Saturday night.

Oh, then forget it.

Then that's kind of fun.

Yeah, I mean, yeah, it's all right.

You're not supposed to go to the bathroom on the bus, is that right?

Not true.

In a lot of the lease buses, that's true.

In ours, we have what's called a grinder.

And it's...

So do we.

It goes...

And it...

Yeah.

Is that the one you swipe? Is that the dudes or the girls? Oh, look, and I'm asking so innocently. I'm not sure.
It's the guy. It's the guy one? Okay.
It's the guy. And if you like somebody, you go left or do you go right? Either way on that one.
Okay. You just go straight up.
Yeah. Let's do this.
Sorry, Will's still chewing. We can hold.
Hold on. We'll wait on Will.
No, no. I took this opportunity because I didn't have anything to add to the grinder.
The grinder session? Yeah. So explain to me what a grinder does, Brad, on the bus.
Oh, my God. Think of it as like a food disposal, but it's the other end of the food spectrum.
Yeah. Yeah, but why would you need to grind it up? That's not the problem.
Seems like you'd be agitating the odor by blending it. Well, you'd think, but it works surprisingly well.
I think what happens is it liquefies it before it ends up in the septic tank on the bus. Will, go ahead and enjoy your balance bar.
This is why you're terrible. Will actually wanted me to ask this.
He was too embarrassed to ask you. He asked me to ask you, which direction did the wheels on the bus go? Round and round, actually.
Well done. That's our first break, everybody.
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Hey guys, everybody should have a support system, right? Who's your support system? My support system, as you well know, talk about all the time, is Scot. And of course, my two besties, Will and Jason.
Whenever I have a problem, an issue, I talk to them about it. And if they're not available, I will talk to a therapist.
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That's betterhelp, H-E-L-P dot com slash smartlist. Now, what about videos? What kind of lane do the videos take in today's sort of music industry? Are they helpful or are they just additive? They've been relegated to the berm of the highway.
We're just not even really doing them. You don't really make them anymore at all? We do them, but they don't matter like they did.
Like they used to be that you'd air them on television. No one on television even shows them anymore.
And it's so like, when you make a video, it's kind of a promotional tool and it's a little more like you want it to be something interesting to watch on Instagram more than you do, more than you care about. Do you pay for it or does the record company pay for it? Usually you split it with them.
You would think that it would be a relevant and attractive piece of media considering, yeah, all the like Instagram watching and the TikToking, whatever the hell's going on. I mean, to watch your favorite artists sing song that you love uh there on your phone um you're listening to it already on your phone you would think and in fact isn't there there's um i was watching my daughter uh she had some one of these pop stars singing a song on the on her itunes and on the itunes on the itunes you could touch the screen and you see the the artist artist might not necessarily be singing the song, but they're doing some other stuff or wouldn't, what, what is that called? Is that like today's video? Uh, yeah, I'm not sure what that is necessarily.
Cause, um, I'm as old as you, but I think that, uh, I see Spotify did something awesome for a while. They did vertical videos.
And so you'd hold your phone and it would be, you had to make it specifically for Spotify. And when you were listening to the song, you could do that.
And it's a video the artist made that's just for Spotify that was like straight up and down. That's what it is.
Some artists, it still comes up on Spotify. I like that.
I think that's cool. But you'll get more views on the lyric video these days half the time than you will on something where you spent $300,000.

Those things are huge.

Wait, what's a lyric video?

It's basically the bouncing ball.

It's like the words go across the screen.

Yeah, so everybody can learn it.

But with a visual of you performing the song as well?

No, it's just the words.

Oh, wow.

I get another reason you should learn how to read, Jason.

I mean, right there. It sounds exhausting.
Yeah, it's not worth it, honestly. Wait a minute, though.
So, Brad, are you saying that, and Jason, are you both saying that making a music video is required but kind of pointless at the same time? Because everybody for years was like, is MTV going to come back with videos? Remember VH1 and MTV, they would play music videos. And we would associate, it would give us something to associate the song with.
And now you have just the song. But I can't imagine, like, well, Will, like you're saying too, it seems it's just a viable outlet to promote the song and the label would back it.
Little mini movies. They were fantastic.
And then they were so engaging just as little pieces of sort of narrative that it got to the point, so I understand it, that bands had to be told and they were required to at least for two or three seconds in every video be playing their instruments. Like you had to show, you had to, it was like a legal requirement that you had to be playing your instruments for like three.
Otherwise you can, you know, walk around and be jumping in pools or whatever the hell the video is, but you literally had to be seeing, playing your instruments, singing the song for a little bit because they became such engaging little tiny mini movies. Yeah, that's probably the case.
I mean, in our town, some did better than others. I had a great run where I had some that really mattered.
The first one that really mattered for me was, that was like bigger than the song at first, which was a song kind of I'm going to miss her, which is a funny song about fishing. Um, and it's basically the, the hook of the song is, you know, got it the hook.
Yeah. If I hit that, yeah, very good.
If I hit that fishing hole today, she'll be packing all her things and she'll be gone by noon chorus while I'm going to miss her. Um, you know, and at the end of the chorus, it's like, Oh, looky there, I've got a bite.
And, and so I had this idea and I went to the label and I said, I want to get – I'm going to throw the book at it. And I want to hold a fake fishing tournament.
Dan Patrick will be the announcer. And then second half of the song, all the wives – I'm going to have some other country singers and stuff in it.
All their wives end up on the Jerry Springer show, mad at us talking about how their husbands have abandoned them.

And we did all that.

Like we pulled that off, that thing still exists.

And as you can imagine,

that was sort of like a watershed moment for me

because I went in there and kind of called my shot.

I sort of pointed at the left field wall

and I'm going to get all these people.

And I didn't know Jerry Springer.

I didn't know Dan Patrick at the time,

but I called him up and they did it.

But you'd had a fair bit of success by that point, right?

I'd have a couple i'd had a i'd had two number ones at that point yeah that'll do it what was that feeling because as i alluded to when when uh when i did the intro that you've had i think it's 14 uh number one it's 22 but it's fine yeah a touchdown. Wow.
Somebody's getting fired. We all know who.
It's okay. I mean.
22. So 22.
So now it's kind of like, yeah, 22. But I mean, that first number one, was that moment? Do you remember that moment of like? It was great because here's what it was.
It was that first song I was telling you about that was like, I didn't even think it'd be a single. It was this really heartfelt song about the plight of sort of a stepdad trying to sort of be everything his kid needs.
And we were in a battle to try and get number one. The way number ones work, it's like anything in our industry and your industry too, where it's just politics and it's a game and it's who got the most spins that week.
And a lot of times that's manipulated and purchased and, you know, it's flyaways and giveaways and all these things to get it there. And, and, uh, we were in a just knockdown drag out battle for number one, the week it was going.
And I went to WSM to be on the radio on a Monday morning, which is the oldest radio station in country music. It's the place where the Opry started in the 20s.
And it's AM. And I went and did an interview with the woman that was the DJ there.
And she's still on to this day. And we were talking about the song.
She's like, I really hope this goes number one today. I know you guys are trying.
And I'm driving home from the grand old opry house and i'm on the interstate and and i'm and i'm listening to wwea driving down the road and she comes on and says brad paisley if you're listening your song just went number one wow that's on the radio station that's incredible wow that i had to like pull over i was like i couldn't driving. But I'll bet you the second number one felt pretty good too because if you had any doubt that maybe the first one was like, ah, you know.
Oh, yeah. Maybe I'm a one-hit wonder or maybe I'll never be able to do it again or whatever.
Like, boom, did it again. And then the third one that's like, oh, I'm going to be around a while now.
Well, all of them were a struggle. They were all a struggle in the beginning.
Like the first three weren't, it wasn't like I set the world on fire. My third single went to 16 and died.
It was still kind of a hit, but it didn't have the legs to go all the way up the chart. Sort of like me.
I don't have the legs either. Never have.
Your legs are beautiful, Brad. Don't say that.
Oh, thanks. I appreciate that.
But so that one went number one. And and then the one after it we struggled to get it to number two and it went all the way to number two and it wasn't really setting the world on fire and that's when i went into my record label after that fourth single and i'd had two number ones but every other song was sort of a lot of work and i begged them to let me release this fishing song.
And they just kept saying, women are going to be offended by that. They're going to be so offended that you're saying you want to go fishing instead of stay with your girlfriend.
And it was like, I don't think they are. I think they know us.
And it set the world on fire in our, in my industry. And my album was like, at the time, here I was with a song that went to number two, and my album was like 35 on the chart.
My album went from 35 to two in three weeks when the fishing song came out. Wow.
Have you gone fishing with Kimmel? No, I never have. But he goes up and goes fly fishing with like Huey Lewis every year, I know.
Is fly fishing your thing? Or do you do a different kind of fishing? I'm not as good at it but i i love it do you go oh man it's i've never have but the way he talks about those trips i i'd like to i'd like to learn just just to go on it you should jump on we should plan one and do that sometime we we were gonna go we we went on uh um like spring break together with all the kids and stuff and it was molly's birthday and we're in in this beautiful place. And there was like lots of it.
And Jimmy's like, anybody want to go fishing? And of course, we were like, no. Jason and I did not go.
And Jimmy went out with the guy. Yeah, but he's getting up at four in the morning and jackass in three hours to whatever the fishing hole is.
I'm talking about like, these are like dedicated trips where you got to like pack in with a bunch of horses and stay in a lodge and things like that i i that sounds uh sounds good from here but i'd probably start whining about thread count as soon as i as soon as i got up there you know these sheets sheets are too rough my nipples are raw i gotta sleep with a shirt on now yeah absolutely i get that brad i have a cheesy songwriting question so brad when you and you and I play, you know, Mafia through Zoom with all of our friends, Brad, off the top of his head, it made me laugh. So off the top of his head, it was something like, this whole town is so fucked up.
A whole bunch of whores in pickup trucks. Like, but like it was a whole song, like at the top, at the top of your head, which is so mind blowing.

We did a mafia where I scored the session basically.

Yeah.

He scored.

He scored the whole game.

Where somebody died and we'd start singing something.

Yeah.

It was so funny.

It was a lot of fun.

Unbelievable.

So how do you do that?

A. And B.
Because I think that's remarkable.

And one of the cheesiest all time questions questions anybody could ask a songwriter but i'm always

intrigued because everybody has a different process lyrics first or music first and and why

i think that it could be either on the lyrics or music it's just for me it's never that hard to

kind of find a melody for something if i have a good idea of what a great lyric ought to be like

if i have a good idea a good idea is like the kind of thing that you're like oh man i gotta write that

and the melody will find it but um lyrics are the hard part. That's the part that you don't want.
I don't like things that are cliched and feel totally just tired and retread. I love those songs.
Those are my favorite. Are they? Yeah.
Where would you go for help for lyrics? Do you read poetry? Do you look at certain authors? Do you? Yeah, I mean, it can be anywhere. There's a songwriter in Nashville named John Imes who's written some big songs over the years.
I saw him say something once at a writer's night, a Bluebird writer's night, and it stuck with me. And it was, don't expect output if you don't have input.
If this was a computer, you have to have input. I mean, it's like so read and listen to things and watch movies and all of it.
I mean, I've gotten songs from the strangest lines. I think there's an Arrested Development line that I used as a basis for a hook of a song once, and I can't remember which one it was.
I had a song called Sleeping on the Foldout on my first album that's literally from Seinfeld. Remember when, remember, it's about basically, then the chorus of the song is an old-fashioned country, like, sleeping on the foldout, thanks to me and my big mouth.
Why did I say what I said or whatever? You know, your wife basically makes you sleep on the couch. It came from when Jerry's like, I'm going down to Florida, and George is like, you know, you're going to sleep on the fold-out.
He's like, yeah. God, my back will never be the same.
And it's like, no, that's a pretty good country title, sleeping on the fold-out. That's so incredibly country.
That's one of the great things about country. It makes it so accessible because it talks about just these things,

these real life, like me and my big mouth.

I got to sleep on the fold out.

It's like, you know, this old truck, she broke down,

and now I'm just looking for my dog.

Right.

Hang on.

Let me write all this down.

This is gold.

I mean, this just pours out of him.

This pours out of him.

But I love it.

But it's so great.

That's what makes it so, like, there is that kind of, I don't know, what is it, folk poetry?

Like, it is like this thing, and it's sort of the narrative of your life and what's going on and the day-to-day.

Obviously, some of it's much bigger, but there is that thing that makes it so immediate that people can relate to in its immediacy it's it's not esoteric i had really good teachers in that like one of my songwriting partners is a genius whose father was a songwriter and who did great and his name is chris dubois and he always used to just brutally critique my songs in a great way.

And he's somebody, we own a publishing company together.

But he's the kind of guy that's like, don't do that.

You wouldn't say that.

And that's a big thing with country songs.

It's like, you wouldn't say that.

So why would you put that in a country song? And the best ones, whether you're listening to stuff like the old Harlan Howard songs

or something from R Format and Johnny Cash or anything like that,

or even John Prine, who I would consider practically a country writer in so many ways. It's just like, you wouldn't say that.
Don't sing it. That's a big problem.
It's like, when you can't put your finger on why you don't like a line in a song, it's usually, oh yeah, I'd never say that. Like there's pet peeves for me of songs that'll say know, uh, instead of saying it the way you'd say it, they rhyme a word that's like, you know, um, snow that's white or something, you know, and it's like, you wouldn't say snow that's white.
Cause you would just, it's freaking snow. You just, um, what is the, um, I think, I think anybody would agree.
As soon as you start hearing a country song, you know, it's a country song, irrespective of, of the, of the lyrics. Um, there is a, there's a sound to a country song and it's not just a slide guitar.
What is, is there an element, a component, a recipe that, oh no, guys, we've got to change it. This sounds too

much like a rock song or this sounds too much like a disco song or this like, like, what do you have to have in a country song for it to be in the lane that the expectant audience is looking for? I think you're hitting the nail on the head in one way and that it's, there's always something that makes it that.

If you have a rock beat

and a lyric about

something completely sort of urban, it's not a country song. But if you have a rock beat and you're singing about, I'm taking my baby out into this cornfield tonight.
Right, yeah. We're going to lay in the bed of my truck.
You could be as heavy metal as you want. It's a country song.
You know, same with, you have a something where there's a a banjo underneath and it's like well immediately that becomes a little inbred it's good um but there's no but there's not there's not there's not a melodic um essential ingredient yeah i think there is but i'm not sure exactly what yeah i think it's that there's that one thing that feels, and sometimes it's the singer. Like, somebody asked Waylon Jennings once, what makes a song country? He's like, when I sing it, it's country.
Yeah, because you're talking like this or something like that, right? Well, I'll tell you right now. And it's like, you could sing, you know, you know, come on, baby, living on a prayer.
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Is there a genre of music that you just will not listen to, that you just do not like?

Well, that was, I was going to say, what would we be surprised?

I listen to a lot of other stuff. Like, I listen to less country these days than I did early on in my life.
I listen to a lot of – I like alt rock. I really do.
I like everything from obscure British bands to – I love like Dawes. You know what I'm talking about? But they're kind of country, but that's a great – I like Coldplay.
I like all that. Where do you put Wilco? They's sort of a country hybrid right absolutely i love wilco i love wilco do you know that band before do you like uncle tupelo that band that used to be that wilco and sun came out of yeah yeah absolutely i think i mean things like that intrigue me because they get away with little tricks that it's like i'm gonna try to do that kind of thing right there tweety's always thinking of something that's like, oh, that's pretty neat.
There's like sonic sort of atmospheric sort of soundscape at times, right? And then they'll go right into a, do a banjo sort of typical 4-4 or something. And, and yeah, it's really interesting.
And what about, what about other classic like Americana bands like, um, like REM? What would you think? Was that the, did you listen to them? Absolutely. Well, they were they were yeah they were big when i was in school so yeah i mean where did you go to school you mean like college yeah college i went to belmont in nashville okay i moved here to go to belmont university but i'm from west virginia so i mean see i i got out of getting beat up in high school by learning how to play Clapton and Van Halen stuff on the guitar.
You know, so it'd be like, it was like a scene in one of those, in Thriller or something, where they're about to beat me up and it's like. Whip out a ukulele and you're all set.
Absolutely. So then, knowing all that, to Sean's original point, which which i cut in on what will you not listen to that's a good question i don't like steel drum music i mean you know what i'm saying like that in that immediate like reggae i like i like reggae to a point but like steel drum music that's something about that instrument bothers me.
Sure. You probably had a bad experience with some undercooked chicken, one of those carts.
On a cruise. Yeah.
Right, yeah. Sure.
A little rhino virus on a cruise and steel drums are never the same. Rhino virus.
Where are you on that yelling rock? What's it called? Oh, death metal? They're screaming. Yes, that one.
Death metal. You love that, right? Yelling rock.
Well, I don't, but here's the thing that's fun about it. Hey, pops.
You can imagine Jason holding a newspaper as a car goes by in his neighborhood going, turn down that yelling. Turn down that rocket.
I do something really fun with my kids. So there's liquid metal as a channel on Sirius, and then there's 50s on 5, okay? So if you take on your card aisle and you put Liquid Metal and 50s on 5 side by side and you save them on your presets, go back and forth.
It's the greatest entertainment in the history of life because it's like all the chapel bells were rang. Death, death, you go back they were singing in the square you know i'm gonna kill you baby i'm gonna rip your guts out and you go back and forth and it's fantastic are they old enough to love that how old are they they're 11 and 13 yeah we've been doing that for years though they would howl like every now and then we get one where we'd get one where it was like, you know, something about, you know, the sweet little angel.
And then all of a sudden, die. Yeah.
Now, is that a boy and a girl? Girl and a boy. Two boys.
Two boys. How is that? 11 and 13.
That sounds, boy, two boys. Have you, how many times have you been to the emergency room? Let's see, three.
Three. Three times.
Three in total. What about you, Will? Are you there yet? Oh, we've been a few times.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. We've had multiple stitches.
Your past three. I've had multiple times with my 11-year-old, with Archie, where he's, like, getting stitches in his head and his toe, and I'm having to help hold them down, and he's looking at me going, why? Why? I'm like, it's heartbreaking, man.
How many do you have, Jason? Do you have? I got two girls, 13 and eight.

Oh, man, that's not easy.

Only one emergency room visit.

And that was for yourself, right?

Yes.

Yes.

For my broken heart, because they weren't listening, Sean.

I get it.

I get it.

No, but that 13-year-old's really starting to run our mouths.

So we could end up back there pretty soon.

You know?

I get it, though.

My 13-year-old, the boy, it's like there was this day where it switched it was like wait it's teenagers what the heck is that it's at 11 right it's at 11 isn't it well with him it was third it's like he turned 13 and kim was out of town and so we had had the best night i mean we had done this thing called lava lava, which is this game we play where I'm tossing them in the pillows. And we've been doing that since they were two.
And then, you know, like we were, we, I made them warm milk before bed. We did something else.
And then they asked if they could do one more thing, which was like one other fun thing we do. And I said, no, it's bedtime.
And he just went like immediately just like, you know what, dad? Uh-oh.

It is so stressful when mom's gone and I can't wait for her to come back.

Oh, my God.

I was like this 13-year-old came out and I went, oh, I get it.

Look, I know what you're doing.

And he went, what do you mean?

I said, I was you and it's not going to work.

I said, here's why it's not going to work.

You're trying to hurt my feelings. You know what I love more than anything, Huck? I love being with you guys.
And guess what I would not say to you? I can't wait for mom to get back. I wouldn't say that because I love this time together.
That's Jedi. And I said, and you're trying to hurt me, and it's not working.
Because it didn't hurt. I said, I know what you're doing.
And he went, he started crying. And he was like, I'm so sorry.
Beautiful. Busted.
Okay, I'm Andy Griffith, folks. I am Andy Griffith.
You know what, though? That's great. Brad, I've got a suggestion.
Maybe this is a different way. Next time he does that, you go, hey, you know what, man? You hurt my feelings.
And you need to know when I get low and my feelings are hurt, I write a hit song and you just made me millions of dollars. So go ahead and keep doing it because I am going to write a heartbreak song.
I'm going to try that tactic next. Sean and Scotty don't have to worry about any of this stuff, do you? Yeah, no, Scotty and I don't have kids.
My favorite quote I think I ever read in my life was, I'd rather regret not having kids than have them and regret it later. So I...
It, it's healthy. That's good.
Right. Right.
But, um, yeah, I, we always talk about having kids and I'm like 90% there. He's probably like 85% there, but neither of us are a hundred percent because if he was like, oh my God, I want kids so bad.
I'd be like, at least there's one of us I can hand the child off to right because they want that you know that's what in-laws or nannies or night nurse or uh or school that's what school's for school's daycare until about 10th grade right sean sean and i've worked on a couple shows together my kids come and visit a lot and he'd just be like jesus these kids kids, can you just do? No, I do not.

The thing about all of what I just said is I absolutely, truly do love kids.

No, he does.

I just think they're awesome.

I just don't. It really seems like it.

Yeah.

Sean, why don't you just wait a little while longer?

You know, start when you're 60, maybe.

Sounds like kids.

Be specific.

They're the little people.

They're the smaller ones that are. Yeah.
Do you guys have pictures? Just get on it, maybe. Sounds like kids.
Be specific. They're the little people.
They're the smaller ones that are.

Yeah.

Can you get you guys a pictures or.

Just get on it, Sean.

You're going to love it.

And you got time to get your head around it.

While the kid learns how to walk and talk, it lets the parents become parents.

The adults become parents.

Look, I have nine nieces and nephews.

I have God kids.

I love all of them.

I love spending time with them.

Name one of them.

Name one of them right now. Well, you you know what do not play these games with me no sean do you work for jpl or is that just a hat uh i moonlight i moonlight there i build i built the rover the mars rover oh yeah i had a hand in that no uh i'm a fan of uh astronomy sci-fi science all that kind of stuff so i have gone on a couple tours at the jet propulsion laboratory in pasadena california because it's close and i actually did see the rover before it went to mars so it was wild to see in person a piece of spacecraft that actually is on another planet right now yeah you must crush must crush ass.
What a catch you are. Yeah.
With that intro, you could become the president of the Jizz Propulsion Laboratory. Yeah.
It's just incredible. That's wonderful.
Who says I'm not? Jesus. And here's our expert in propellant.
Jizz propulsion laboratory. You know, Brad, I wanted to say this is the worst segue.
I just want to see how to all the kids out there who are looking for inspiration listening to our podcast. So, Brad, so you have all these hits.
You're a huge star. Oh, brother, stop stroking my ego like I'm the jizz propulsion expert on him.
This is what I'm getting to, the jizz propulsion aspect of your life. No, what I wanted to say was, but you do all this stuff in country music, and then you become, and then you start, well, first of all, you start doing these ads with Peyton Manning.
I want to know, were you guys friends before you guys started doing these ads? Because they became omnipresent, and I think that that's – it's a big campaign, but that's something that, like, opened you up to people who weren't necessarily familiar with that – with your music or that genre. How did that happen? And were you – I always want to know, were you guys buddies? We didn't know each other that well.
We'd seen each other at some things and were very complimentary. And I liked him.

I mean, I'd been around him some. He's a comedic genius.
Honestly, I mean that. And I'm not throwing that out lightly.
He really, I've never seen anybody who's from the sports world that understands that. Like he does.
He understands. I've long said he's the best comedic athlete that of all time without a doubt i think his comedy chops are just he knows who he is and so the way it came about was nationwide is on your side they're on our side they had this idea for a campaign that was really fun that was what if there to the song than you know? And they're like, we want you to write like a verse about a guy that, you know, backs his RV over the flower bed after he buys it for retirement.
And so I did that and went and did some commercials for them just with a guitar. And in passing, when we were sitting there, they said, what else do you think we could do with this? And said well i think what would be fun is if peyton basically starts telling me how to do this and the next thing you know they've booked a session and the first ads we did were me in the studio i sort of sang like a line and i'm like what do you think he's like better but come here and he starts like teaching me how to sing on the camera and everything and it was way more comedy gold than i could have even imagined they're great they're really great i remember when he came on snl when my ex-wife was on there and it was just like he was just so much better and so much more than everybody expected he was hilarious i remember him on there but anyway so you do those things and they're huge and then did that kind of like change did you notice a change like a shift yeah yeah well what's it's interesting because it's a risky thing when you do a commercial, as you know, Will, because they can really backfire and people can look at you with less respect when it's over.
You know what I mean? Oh, I'd love to pull over here for one second, go down Will's commercial cannon right now. Well, should we do it alphabetically? Listen, that's a lot of fun.
You know the old saying, there's no selling out. There's only buying in.
We'll be right back. Wow.
Yeah. That's the thing, though, is when you sign up for one of these campaigns, you're just, it's like, you hope it's going to be as great as you hope.
And then in the end, it's like, it's rare that it's something that's that much fun. Like, when we film these, it's so much fun anyway.
And we have a ball. And then, and a lot of them are ad- ad libbed.
Like there's one where we're going down the road and he's trying to tell me how to write a song. And that one where we're on that bus, that was all ad libbed.
And that's one of the better ones. It's just really, it's, it's really something I would do.
Don't tell them this, but I would do it for free because it's so much fun, but I'm not gonna. You can tell.
And you guys, and you guys seem like old friends too. I mean, it really reads that you guys.
And we that you guys and we are now yeah we really are like one of the most eye-opening moments of this uh pandemic has been on a Saturday night I'm walking down to the barn on our farm and I'm just like my phone I look down there's a text from Peyton he's like hey jump on this zoom right now and I go boom and I jump in this zoom and he's like okay Brad Paisley's here and it's him and a bunch of this Zoom and he's like, okay, Brad Paisley's here. And it's him and a bunch of football players.
And he's like, and a newscaster and somebody else. And he's like, okay, get one famous person from your Rolodex and put them in right now.
And so I texted Darius and I'm like, hey, what are you doing? He's like, I'm watching the R. Kelly documentary.
And I'm like, take a break. I'll tell you how it ends.
And then shower um, shower and then, yeah, right. And so he jumps on and then Dan Patrick jumps on and Kevin Hart.
And this was a Saturday night and it was everybody having like a zoom drinking session, famous people, crazy, weird. And it was awesome.
It was like, Oh, this is, this is really wild. These are people I'd have never, ever just hung out with on a Saturday night in another way, probably, and it was a lot of fun.
Yeah, I think people discovered a lot of new ways to hang out, communicate, work during all this. There are some silver linings, I think, I hope.
And Sean and I are having a ball with what we're doing. I mean, that whole group we're in is really fun.
This is the fake killing people stuff people stuff fake killing people yeah but it'd be sean hasn't really given a yet again a good explanation as to why he can't get on tonight like what is he possibly doing i know i agree okay do you want to know for real obviously is your power going out again sean's power went out for 24 hours and you'd think that this guy that the pandemic was nothing compared that. Why don't you get a generator, Sean? Yeah, right.
Why don't you stay there and mind your own business? So the— Fair enough. No, Scotty has some friends that he, a group of friends that he has, that they're all kind of like Trekkies, and they all like, you i call them the apple dumpling gang okay so he has a zoom meeting with the apple dumpling gang tonight boy once again just the ass crushing that must go on all right you guys are the nerdiest gay guys i've ever known a thousand percent consistently too different breed consistently.
So after you're done thinking about science and space and all that stuff,

then it's the Trek.

You keep it on the same sort of theme.

Yeah.

Well, now, yeah, I am not a Trekkie.

I'm more like a Star Wars person.

How dare us, right?

You're just into rockets and stuff.

Yeah, right. So, Brad, I'll go fishing with all the guys,

but I'll probably bring a bunch of sci-fi DVDs, a bunch of Star Wars DVDs. And you'll be in cosplay.
Star Wars cosplay. Yeah.
That's right. He goes fishing dressed as Luke.
Yeah. Do you guys ever do like a cosplay, like two different worlds, the Star Wars versus Star Trek, like, lightsaber battle? That would be great if I could get a video of you in Sky.
Yeah, but we don't actually use the actual lightsabers. We use other things.
I'll bet you don't. On that note.
Yeah, thanks, Sean. Thanks for ruining everything.
Oh, said the guy who called me Jizz Propulsion Laboratory. You're the president.
That's right, I am. I'm the CEO.
I don't just hand those hats out. Brad, you've been a very, very nice man.
A very good sport. I've had fun.
Thank you very much for doing this. I'm honored to honored to talk to you guys.
It's been. I'm looking forward to our to our friendship coming up in our Dodger game.
We are definitely going to a Dodger game one way or another how often are you out here in LA? the three of us had a game, amazing well, on a typical I'm going to pretend I didn't hear him say that on a typical time frame we'd probably once a month for a week at least yeah, we're out there a lot but I go all the time so we'll go hang out yeah, out and yeah yeah we may have to wait for a while but uh at least we've got this right we've got our zoom session we've got our podcast uh episode and uh and plans for the future yeah what's better than that y'all hands in you see the way i ended on a real up note like that instead of the jizz stuff you were going with will by the way, even in the best of times, as if Jason would put his hand in to touch somebody else's hand, there's no way. He'd be balled up.
He'd be balled up with a sleeve over it. You got to know this, Brad.
Brad, you're going to see this when you guys start hanging out. If you go to get somebody to eat, he goes.
As soon as you go to sit down at the restaurant, he goes to the bathroom to wash his hands, and he comes out like he's going into surgery. He's washed his hands to the elbow, and you can't high five.
And I kick the chair out. And he kicks the chair.
I won't touch the menu anymore. So I got to order first, then go to the boil.
That's right. Hey, I'm exactly with you.
I won't touch the menu either. By the way, I have one bone to pick with Jason now that I've met him.
Were you a guest on Knight Rider? Yes, sir. Yeah, I drove the kit car.
15. I was so happy.
I was your age when that happened, and I was so pissed at you that a kid got to do that. A great week, right? Yeah, it was a very quick yes for me.
I bet. I'm just so upset about it still.
You've been watching TV as long as I have. We've got stuff to cover.
I'm not going to bring the radio for our game. That's my promise to you.
That would mean a lot to me, actually. Wow, Will.
How does that make you feel, Will? Sean, I'll just go hang with you and pretend that I don't know sports exist. You give me that foul ball back and I'll bring you to another game.
We'll watchalorian second season well thank you brad man you're a prince of a dude thanks man for coming on here it's been great and um we'll see you soon i'll put you guys i'll i'll send you each other's digits how about that boy thanks willie thanks will that's really cool cool way to put it too i. I'm going to make it.
I'm going to make it.

I got all the cool sayings.

I got it on a ticker tape that comes out here with all the cool expressions.

Thanks, Brad.

Thanks, guys.

God bless you.

Good luck.

See you, man. You too.

Good luck with everything.

See you soon.

Bye, guy.

So, wait, Will.

Did you not know that I knew Brad?

I didn't know that you guys knew each other.

No.

Oh, yeah. And I can't check because I don't want to get like, hey, I'm going to have a guest on.
I don't want to tell you what it is, but do you know Brad Paisley? Right. How long have you guys known each other? You know what? All the bits and all the jokes everybody made about my gong show, I had Brad on as a, he came on as a judge on the gong show.
Well, tell people you were a producer of the gong show. I executive produced the gong show when we brought it back a couple years ago.
And I asked a lot of people to come and do it. Some people said yes and some people said no.
That's how it went. And Brad came on and he was terrific.
And some people said no. And some people said no.
Repeatedly. Uh-oh.
And then changed their number. So Brad.
Don't make this weird. So Brad came on like a good—he was a good guy.
Like a good guy does. Where he'll do something for you if he asks you to do it.
Yeah. Right.
And that's what—because he's a good person and he's selfless and he's not, you know, selfish. So anyway, so— Wait a minute.
Did you ask Jason to do it? No, that's not what we're talking about. And that's the kind of people—you know, and that's how we won the World War II because we were just selfless in that way.
And some people were heroes and some people were not. Some people were at home pushing pencils and worried about their own, you know.
Oh, it's so Jason. Doesn't matter.
Doesn't matter. Doesn't matter.
It's unrelated. Some people hit the beach at Normandy.
Some people were at home. Okay, anyway.
Some people hit the beach at Malibu. Okay, so point is.
Point is. So that was super fun.
How great was Brad? The best. I'm so glad that you guys are friends.
And Jason. I'm about to be friends.
It's a real love affair. I'll steal them from both of you guys.
Yep. It's a real love affair that's blooming here, huh? We can have visitation rights, yeah.
You guys could, you felt that, right? Well, I was. Yeah, you did not imagine.
I'm not crazy. Yeah.
No, not at all. Be honest.
If you had anticipated that it was going to be Brad and that you guys were going to get along so well, would you have done a little bit more manscaping before? Would you have cleaned yourself up a little bit? I would have definitely done my hair that you can see for sure. Yeah.
The manscaping, I don't think it's. But just to feel good.
But just so you can, it reads if you feel better.

Yeah.

I feel great.

About what's going on down there.

I feel good.

I tightened a lot up yesterday.

Okay, good.

Good for you.

Yeah, let me show you.

Let me just tilt this camera down.

Let's not.

Uh-oh, uh-oh.

Here it comes.

Here it comes.

Bye.

Smart. Bye.
Smart. Smart.
Smart. Smart.
Hey, friends. Jason here.
We're so excited the Smart List has officially joined the SiriusXM family. We can't wait to announce new surprise guests who we know that you'll love.
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