Ep 207. Stevie Martin - Series 19 Ep.7

Hello there, welcome to the Taskmaster podcast.

It's me, Ed Gamble.

I'm in the caravan.

Patatas is looking at me with his cold, dead stare.

We have another brilliant guest today to talk about Taskmaster Series 19, episode 7.

And our special guest is Stevie Martin.

Stevie Martin, current contestant on Series 19.

Stevie is fantastic.

She's brilliant.

I can't wait to see her.

I can't wait to chat to her about the show.

I know she had a great time.

I wonder whether she will enjoy revisiting all of those great times.

But let's get on with it.

Taskmaster Series 19, Episode 7, as discussed by Stevie Martin.

Welcome, Stevie, to the Taskmaster podcast.

Oh, it's horrible to be here

in this particular area.

Yeah, so this area you were saying is the area that sort of triggers you the most.

When we were standing outside, you were delighted to be back.

I was so happy.

And I was feeling a bit like travel sick, and I was worried that when I got here, because I was in the car for ages, I was worried that when I got here, it wouldn't be exciting, and it was so exciting.

You seem very at peace out there.

I'm so zen out there.

I loved doing the tasks so much.

But yeah, here was every single one I did in here was,

I had a nervous breakdown.

Yeah.

Yeah, I think most of them are bad.

There was the I set fire to it.

You set fire to it.

You set fire to it.

Yeah.

And I had to try to get the breakfast drink.

They were very calm with the fire.

Nobody stopped.

No one was like, we need an intervention.

The fire just, I just put it out myself, actually.

I think.

I think it just eventually went because I smothered it with so many candlesticks.

Yeah.

Sure.

Yeah, that breakfast drink.

Yeah, that was real bad.

That was real bad.

When you, like you say, there's been a few sort of meltdowns.

Yeah.

Were you expecting that going into the show before you started filming?

I was expecting to melt down because everyone told me I would.

And I think I like to think of myself, actually, Alex said, because I filmed on his sitcom

before his series, before I did this.

And

he said to me, after the second day of doing the tasks, oh, we often, you know, pick the contestants and we try to like fit personalities in with different personalities.

And I was like, he'd picked me because he thought I'd be very calm and very centered.

He's like, you are so the opposite, and you are so loud.

And then he realised it was because it was the character he'd because in the zero, I'm playing a character.

So he sort of got me confused.

Essentially, I'm a really good actor, apparently, is what he was saying.

But also, he wrote the character, right?

Yes.

So he cast you in the show where you have to be yourself based on a character that he'd written.

She's like a ghost hunter.

So I was like, the whole thing is like, okay.

Obviously, as well, like in between takes and when I'm on the set of someone else's show, I'm not gonna be running around screaming getting a meltdown.

Although, to be honest, Jason probably would.

Yeah, 100%.

So, actually, maybe.

But, yeah, no, I had a lot of meltdowns, and also there was a lot of it cut out.

So, the light bulb one where you had to guess where it was episode four, we had to guess why the light bulb was turning on.

I spent half an hour

honestly, like, just looking at Alex, going, I can't.

Yeah, Alex, I can't.

Alex what happens if I just leave I can't and I was getting really hot because it reminded me of um being bad at maths at school because there were these like little maths clues and I was just remembering like I'm such an idiot

it's just yeah it's there was so many meltdowns I can see it happening to you again while you're just remembering it yeah I mean the the body keeps the score

but you're chaotic Jason's chaotic

I think everyone is chaotic in their own way yes Fatia I think does not get enough credit for how logically and brilliantly she did, she does the task.

I think she's the best at the task.

I don't know about statistically.

I don't care.

But, like, because Matt is obviously very strong points-wise, but I think that's because of his prize tasks.

Yeah.

He's a little swat with his prize tasks.

He's very creative with the prize tasks.

He gave too much thought.

He obviously didn't have enough on.

Whereas Fatia's prize tasks are horrific.

Yeah, really bad.

Mad.

But she doesn't panic.

Yeah, her brain doesn't panic.

So in the tasks, she thinks things through and she just...

Whereas I think your time starts now, just it awakens something within me that I don't wish to look at.

See, I think I knew you were going to be like that.

Yes, I know you did.

Yeah, because you told me.

Oh, yeah, I did actually.

I did know that.

I was a little bit of people

who told me.

My friend's agent told me.

At one point, I think it was after this episode.

that we're talking about now, I called my parents and my parents had come in to see one of the live episodes.

And I was like, I'm just, I was like, I know it's not about the points.

Like, I know that, but there's something in me.

I'm a very difficult balance of like a perfectionist and a high achiever, but I'm insane.

So, like, they don't mix ever.

Like, I can never get to where I can because I'm not doing it.

So, I was sort of saying to her, I was like, he's like, my dad said, well, you're, it's fine.

You're, you're the endearing idiot.

I told my friend, my dad, I told my friend that.

She laughed so much and was like, yeah, obviously.

Like, what did you think you could be?

Like, the mysterious Spanish woman.

My friend Selia.

But

yeah, I did think I would be.

I didn't think I would melt down so much.

I thought I would maybe melt down, but also surprise myself because this is a show for people whose brains work in an interesting way.

So maybe I would actually be really good at this.

And I won't say anymore.

Did you ever surprise yourself?

Up until this point, we were talking about episode seven.

Are there any that you were like, wow, I didn't think I could do that and I did it?

Yes, there were certain tasks where I was convinced I'd done really badly and I'd been the only one to do that.

Like in this episode, when we walk through and there's a pen dangling, and after, I think I was the first one to do that task.

I must have been because the crew couldn't believe that I'd moved out of the way of the pen and not seen it.

And I was learning to drive at the time.

And my driving instructor basically was so surprised by all of my decisions.

I think I clocked in nearly 200 hours and then had to clock out of driving because I still couldn't.

So it's good to get an update.

Yeah.

So you can't drive.

Absolutely can't drive.

Because on the show, on episode five, you said it was 150 hours.

So you did some more.

You did 50 more hours.

I did some more, yeah.

And then tapped out.

And then tapped out.

Yeah.

And that was

realizing that when I'm stressed, I essentially just go blind.

I can't see anything.

And so with that pen, I thought about that probably too much afterwards.

I was like, oh,

I'm an idiot.

Everyone else is going to be like, oh, the pen.

So, what was quite nice, and I did surprise myself, is that actually everybody sort of, so often everyone would do the thing.

I would feel, or, you know, there were certain little things that I got that other people didn't get, like the wetsuits.

I was like, I got the pun, and that, and all of that stuff.

Like, or the in the first episode, finding the fish tank really quickly, I was really proud of myself.

But then there were so many more where I was so horrified by why I didn't see this.

The painting one, where like Matt just very calmly pulls the canvas towards himself because he can't jump into the,

I remember at one point, Alex was like laughing at me throwing this the paint.

I was like, what did you want me to do?

I don't know.

No other option.

Genuinely, I think you're like, what?

There's not any other way of doing this.

It's like, okay.

Horrifying.

Yeah.

I like, initially, when I asked you the question, when did you surprise yourself?

Your full answer was

when other people did something really badly.

Definitely.

You were surprised that other people were as shit as you were.

Yeah, I think I basically was exactly as I thought I would be.

And I didn't, the only genuine surprise is that

I enjoyed the studio tasks because I thought I would be the

studio record because I've never really done something like that.

And I thought I'd be really, really scared.

After the first two episodes, I was having the time of my life.

Yeah, you're brilliant.

It's such a good gang together as well.

It was so great.

It was so great.

And I Jason particularly

made me feel like because he was so in this, because we did the three-hour recordings, obviously.

There's so much that was cut out and some of them went so long and so ridiculous.

One of the prize tasks that we that we saw like it was like maybe like an hour and a half.

And the one with Rosie's sex curtain with with the picture of a mom.

That went on for ages, I remember.

And it ended with this like tableau of like me playing the piano and then like like Rosie like like and then Matt was on the floor like so and that but we all kind of loosened up because I think Jason and Fatia as well worked the crowd so much and they were so sort of like on and in yeah we were quite I was quite nervous and I think Matt was a little bit like on out of his comfort zone as well and then so yeah they the gang together we all really helped each other I think you and Jason as a team I love because you are both completely mad and all over the place.

I can't believe how badly we do points points wise.

But you just seem to click straight away.

Because he's great.

Yeah.

And we both like want...

I think I saw something, because people have been sending me things, and

some people have asked me things like, does Jason really like...

Jason doesn't care about his own tasks, but he seemed to care when you're doing the team tasks.

I think Jason did care about the tasks.

I think he was going in being like...

I don't care.

I just want to get on the roof.

I think that's like a fun part of it.

But I think he was hoping that Greg would enjoy his sort sort of creativity and reward that

rather than him do well.

And Greg didn't.

But yeah, I think we both really wanted to do well.

And we also both were just having so much fun.

And I think that was the key.

Like, I was so excited to do the team tasks.

I think Jason even says in this, his

primary objective is to get points and do well.

But his secondary mission is destroy, dismantle, engulfing flames.

Yes, this does.

I'm surprised he didn't do more with fire in the series.

Yeah.

Yeah, I think.

I think he'd spoke, when we spoke to him on this podcast, he talks a lot about the health and safety people.

Right.

Who, certainly when I filmed Taskmaster, were not present.

Well, yeah, that's what I mean.

There was no health and safety people when I've set fire to the place.

I don't think they came in for you.

I don't think they did.

I think they were specifically hired for Jason.

They wanted to stand by for Jason.

He might have brought his own health and safety people with him.

You know what these Americans are like.

Well, he's always got a pen on him and a knife.

Might as well have a clipboard.

A little man with like a clipboard that he puts in his pocket.

Let's talk about this episode, though.

Let's talk about the prize task, the biggest anti-climax.

I found this really difficult.

It's a tough one.

It is a tough one.

I mean, there were some brilliant examples of it.

And I've got to say, I think yours was underscored, Stevie.

I agree.

Actually, I do agree.

And I remember,

by this point, I've not been great at the prize tasks.

So I remember sort of the sinking feeling because you get told what prize task it's going to be sort of just before.

And then, like, oh, it's that one.

Okay.

Okay.

I was having a run of those.

You just sort of hope that everyone else has done badly, but then Matt's is just genius.

But yeah, I think it was good.

I thought it was good.

And it was real.

And it was realistic.

It was real.

And it felt like a universal observation to me.

Thank you.

An ornate box, so exciting.

What's going to be in it?

It's just bits.

Just bits.

Yeah.

Bits or nothing.

Because you buy one of these boxes, or you know, your mum buys one of these boxes.

That's it's your mum.

It's your mum, yeah.

And you're looking at it and thinking there should be something mysterious in there.

But mums don't know what they're going to put in there.

Mums aren't mysterious.

Mums aren't mysterious.

They put everything out there.

I think you deserve more than this.

I think you were in that headspace, prize task-wise,

where the way you presented it within the tone of it had the history of all the previous prize task failures.

I brought a heaviness.

yeah

i brought a heaviness to this episode because i was just like oh god i was hoping to be like second or third sure series yeah yeah i would have loved that and i was like i'm gonna be bottom with jason which is fine but jason does intentionally destroy things and i am doing my best like

but yeah and so yeah there was what so who was what what did everyone else

so you obviously had your ornate display box with pins and a scrunchie in it yeah and And a note that

may not have been your pin number.

For a second, was genuinely.

Yeah.

Oh my, how have I done this?

But it isn't.

It isn't.

It certainly isn't now.

It's filmed last year.

Fatia

did get one point, so you got two points here.

Fatia got the one point for bringing the crisps in.

Yes, that's correct.

Family bag of crisps with barely any crisps in it.

Which, look.

It's not bad, is it?

I think it's fine.

I don't think it's...

Is it an anti-climax?

No, because we know now.

Yeah.

Like, what world is Fatia living in?

Yeah.

She believes that there's loads of crisps.

That the crisps are going to be up to the top of the bag.

Yeah.

The constant disappointment she must move to her life with.

It's not biscuits, mate.

But often, like, I don't mind Fatia's price task not being that good because what she says off the back of it is always so funny.

Yeah, she's always like called the police because there's some sort of food situation.

Yeah.

Trading standards.

Trading standards and reporting the shop having kids working in the basement.

I mean, that went in a place that I could not imagine.

That was so funny.

Because also, like, early on, she'd said about that there was no chocolate in a shop, so she called the police or something.

Yeah.

It's like, oh, there was something about a kit cat.

I remember being like, okay.

And then, yeah, now she's reporting them for sort of child labour infringements.

But she is like, every gig I've done with her, she arrives and she's had an argument on the way.

It's true.

She has had an argument on the way.

It's true.

She's the sweetest.

She's the sweetest woman.

Oh, she's lovely.

Sweetest woman.

But then it is her fallback.

It is her, like,

you know, right, okay, I'm gonna, I will knock you out.

Yeah,

it doesn't really work when I say it.

I will knock you out.

I will.

I'm going to knock you out.

Brother.

You don't stop being a silly sausage.

Rosie,

Rosie brought in her wedding day.

I thought that was great because, as she pointed out, like the fact that she didn't get five and she paid £25,000.

I thought Greg should have.

I actually do think she should have got.

Because that's an emotional thing.

Whereas

Matt's was wonderful, but it was a piece piece of theatre.

Yes.

I suppose it's what do you prefer, like, yeah, Rosie's realism or art?

In terms of reaction in the room, I think Rosie's was a lovely observation.

Not that I'm saying that my wedding day was an anticlimax, but of course,

nothing's ever going to live up to building up to something for that long, is it?

No.

And the little twist of the picture of her and Chris.

Really great with Chris.

Chris looks awful.

Yeah, he looks grey.

He looks so bad.

I think he's dead, doesn't he?

Yeah.

That's why you take the photos before the drinks.

Yeah.

Yeah, not yeah.

Not as you're swallowing the drinks.

Also, I don't know if it was cut out, but someone definitely was like,

he looks like he's mid-climax rather than anti-climax.

That was the exact, yeah.

Or popped it back in there in the audio medium.

So funny.

Let's talk about Jason's.

We'll build up to Matthew's.

Yeah, we have to.

Jason brought in a version of the Taskmaster trophy

with Alex's face.

Yeah, I think that should have got one, actually.

Dude, I mean, it was an amazing-looking thing.

It was an amazing looking thing, but I think we can all stick some paper on Daddy's golden head.

Also,

I was expecting it because it was like when it was back and then it came down.

It was like, well, obviously, it's going to be Alex's face.

Also,

it was a climax because you're like, what's going to be on there?

Oh, it's a weird thing.

Yeah.

An anti-climax would have been if it was just the trophy.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Wow.

Yeah, I see.

So, yeah, so I stand by my point.

Yeah.

One point.

I mean, it looked like it's two, me, three.

I would have felt happy with three.

Yeah.

Yeah, I think I think you deserve that.

Rosie four, okay, I think Rosie four or five and then Matt four or five.

I think probably Matt did deserve the five because I've just remembered the feeling in the room when he was doing it.

And because as well, you think you can see, like, I'm fully on board.

Like, we're all just like, oh my God, like, I have no idea.

It's so clever.

And then it's so, it's like all the best sort of, well, all the best theatre and all the best jokes like you when you when it happens you're like of course you did that yeah how did i not

i thought it was amazing just bit the whole story behind the rube goldberg machine and he's not told his friends and family that it's not going to happen at the end and then so we're like this is going to be the best anticlimax ever and then it's a plastic spoon

i've written a hall of fame I've written down.

Yeah, all right, fair enough.

Yeah, you are right.

I'm bringing the same energy that I had in this episode.

By this point, I was like, all right, Matt, you're really good at the prize.

Yes.

But it was actually really great.

And he's so nice.

Yes.

And he did put a lot of effort into it.

He did.

He wasn't bad at the tasks.

He was.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I mean, there's one coming up where he's brilliant at it, but

he'll get absolutely no plaudits for it because it's disgusting, Matthew.

Yes, yes, it is.

Fatia gets one point.

You get two points, Stevie, three points for Jason, four points for Rosie, and five points for the SWAT that is Matthew Baynton.

Big SWAT, Bainton.

Rosie.

To me, the biggest anticlimax is your wedding day.

There's Rosie's.

This is what the winner gets.

This is great.

He looks like he's died and you've stopped it.

You look forward to your wedding day so much.

It costs an absolute fortune.

And I remember sitting there and just looking at everyone, not finishing their dinner and thinking, I've paid 80 quid for that.

I just found it a huge anti-climax.

Anti-climax.

And you've illustrated it beautifully with that picture.

And that's the only

one.

With that picture of a drunk car salesman.

That's incredible.

Task one: what is in the one yellow box?

You may only give one answer.

All the information is in the task.

Fastest to give the correct answer wins.

Right.

So, this was one where I was like, okay,

I know I've made some batshit decisions.

I know

I think I've not done well on many of these.

So what I'm going to do, I'm going to have a different approach.

I'm going to approach really logically.

I'm just going to do what is in front of me.

I'm also going to really engage, keep all my senses open.

And arguably I did that too well because I wasn't thinking about the concept of Taskmaster, the show, where you do have to look not just at the things that are happening.

yeah, you have to turn around.

Yeah, um, you have to look under the proverbial table, and I never got that, I never looked under the table or above, really, which was so bizarre of me to have not done, but I was so proud of myself at the end of this when I did it, whilst also with that nagging feeling of like that can't have been right because that was too logical and nothing mad happened.

You got it, you got it, though.

I did, but it took like half an hour.

But it took so, like, it was so, it was so long.

Yeah.

And also, when you're doing, you, you must have had this when you're doing the sort of location-based ones, the build-up is so much more as well.

Yeah, of course.

You're like in another place, and then you have to like drive to the end.

And then doing it, it just felt like, well, there were just some boxes, and I just did all the things and I got them.

And then there was a couple of things that I didn't really understand why I'd had to do that.

Also, I did, it was cut out, but I just put together the entire puzzle.

even after the number I just kept doing it and I was like yeah oh you've got the numbers

like yeah no so I was enjoying this the fact that I could do this puzzle yeah but you don't know with him because he could have you know put another number on the back of the puzzle or something

so you've got I would have done the whole puzzle and I hate puzzles yeah um I think there was so much going on in this task that it's almost a shame to do it as quickly as Fatia did yes to not enjoy what's in the boxes to not enjoy what's in the boxes

to see the bear you got these poor members of of crew running around dressed in different outfits

I think in the back of my head even if I'd found the quick way of doing it, I would have been like, I want to see what happens.

Obviously, I want to look in the different boxes and look into the box.

Go and speak to the bear with the magazine and do all of that.

And that was, I was really, that was one of my most proud ones when I went to the bear and thought to look at the date on the magazine

to get the code.

But then when I was putting the code together, there was that gap in the middle, and I just kept saying the code and going, well, I don't know what it is.

Well, I don't know what it is.

And it was like so clearly, there was like the seven or something.

And I just kept, because my brain was not connecting.

This is a constant constant thing my brain just did not connect but I think that's a I think I think it was a cruel edit because they were putting the number up it was very close to where you found the other numbers in terms of time in the edit yeah they made me look stupid yeah yeah yeah but then also you then went oh it's obviously a seven isn't it

yeah um but i think anyone who solves this has done well because there's there's so much going on i mean jason and matt just go for a run around the park oh no didn't jason like chase the fisherman this poor guy

trying to fish who's already weirded out because he can see someone dressed as a monster doing semaphore and a crow who just keeps walking onto the bridge and then leaving the thing.

Yeah, running away at the most opportune moment.

And then he turns around,

guy from Brooklyn 99 shouting in his ear.

Of course, because Jason's also famous.

That's keeping him weird.

Yeah, and the person who thought of the girls that applauded Mark because they thought he was a marathon.

He's a marathon runner.

Which is fair enough because he's fully dressed as a marathon.

We just had a lot of tourists coming up and being disappointed that they couldn't look out of the view because they'd come specifically to go on that hill to look out the view.

And I was sort of stood in the midst of all these boxes with like fish flapping and like things.

I mean, like, no, sorry, you actually can't.

They were like, well, this is why we've got, okay, fine.

A lot of that, really.

But this one looked fun to me because there was so much happening in the future.

It was fun, yeah.

And also, like, there was lots of

points for feel, not actual points, points where you felt like, oh, I've, well, well I did fatty obviously had one but I was like oh I did I did that oh I made that connection Oh, I made that connection and I felt like I was like building this kind of like um Thing that then at the end I would be rewarded by seeing the full picture, but I was just rewarded with this fish that just did that

and then that was the weirdest end to the task it was like I've been here for half an hour What does that mean?

And Alex wouldn't really say anything so like okay, bye.

I just have to like leave and go back to the base and just sort of think about it.

I'd be like, was I missing a pond?

Was there something about a fish?

Like, was it actually the point was that I didn't have to do any of those things.

Yeah, you could have just looked at the date on the bench behind you.

I mean, Fatia does absolutely smash this.

She's incredible, yeah.

And she, she did, she did a similar thing with the light bulb task as well,

where she just saw through everything.

She saw through all of the stuff around the task and went, Yeah, I'll just do that.

And then there we go.

There we go.

And her brain is so logical.

And there is an element to her being like, I'm not doing that.

Is there anything else I can do instead?

You know what I mean?

Like, and that is a really good mix, considering you've got lots of people who are sort of over-trying.

Like, Matt making up his own rules and keeping his finger on his mouth

in the mannequin task, whatever.

Yeah, we all sort of overthought, I think, and Fatia, if anything, underthought, which really helped her.

Well, she's overthinking about doing the least amount possible.

Yeah, which actually ends up being the perfect balance.

That was perfect because sometimes that is going to work.

Yeah.

Sometimes, no, sure.

She also doesn't seem that bothered that she's managed to do it as well.

She's like, Yeah, I just did it.

I know.

So, yeah, great.

But she does.

I think there's a thing of like Fatigue can feel like she doesn't care, but she really does.

Yeah.

And I like how, as the series is going, obviously, the first few, it's her sort of comic persona, but now we're starting to get like actual, like, actually who she is.

Yes.

And what she's like backstage and what she's like.

And we talked a lot about tasks.

Like, she did care.

definitely and she I mean we saw in the last episode uh her teaching Alex how to dance

which is just this wonderful warm interaction where she's so patient and kind with him I know and gets five points for it she's like oh I know in her little face

yeah

no she's brilliant it was one point for you here Stevie yeah it was

two points for Jason three points for Rosie four points for Matt and five points for Fatih.

I think we both felt some sense of rage having run around and then realised it was there all along.

Yeah, a little bit.

And the worst was I was so excited to talk to the fisherman and he kept moving further and further away.

Of course not.

So I had to chase the man just to talk to him who did not want to be talked to.

He did find the fish before you, so there was something for him.

I got got sympathy from a couple of young girls on a park bench, and that was a low point.

Well, they applauded you because they thought you were a marathon runner.

Let's talk about task two, a task that I think will go down as one of the most memorable task attempts in this series and perhaps in Taskmaster history.

Eat this yogurt with the most slash least dignity, most extreme eating wins so obviously you get to pick what word you write in the task before you've seen the task everyone apart from matt picks most

why did you go for most what was the what was the thinking behind that Was it just random?

It was random actually, because you just don't have any idea.

By that point, we'd done quite a few of tasks.

I was just like, I get you at this point.

Fucking.

Let's just get on with it.

Yeah, for God's sake.

Let's get on with it.

Also, actually, I did think that maybe it could be something to do do with fitting things in your mouth, and I've got quite a big mouth.

I do remember thinking that.

I was like, oh, I could stretch.

Oh, we've not done a fit every

fit loads of things in your mouth task yet.

Yeah, okay.

Maybe it's happening.

So you thought the other option was to fit the least things in your mouth.

Yeah, and I'd be terrible.

Yeah.

Fast too big, can't stop.

This, of course, is the pen as well.

The issue with finding the pen is you.

It's so vindicating to see everybody doing that.

Yeah.

And then Rosie just obviously

can't find it for ages.

Oh my god.

It's on her hair.

It's like, and then Jason's got one, of course.

It's just lovely.

It's like, isn't it people say that if you're writing characters for like a book or a film,

you should do a thing like you place like a box in the room and you really know your character is strong when you can say exactly how each character will react to that box.

And I feel like with the pen, it was like that.

Yeah.

Fatiha just like walked straight through it and was like, oh, pen's over there.

ISO was quite anxious about it.

Rosie was looking for ages.

Jason had one.

I mean, what an outstanding end to that was, where he just pulls a pen out and then looks at Alex and says, Don't.

I've seen that.

Yeah.

I can see the pen.

I've seen the marker.

I've got a pen.

Okay.

So, four of you pick most.

I think most is a eat the yogurt with the most dignity is really hard.

Yes, because what does that well?

I've got beef with how this was scored.

Right.

I think it's because I think, yeah,

least dignity, I think, is easier to do because

you know exactly what that means.

Whereas I think what was quite clear by our attempts,

I think Rosie and Fatty's attempts were deranged.

Well, hinge.

I think there's sort of only one way to go with most dignity.

Mine.

That is only, it's just like the sort of...

It's Jason's if he didn't get the

but it is going to be like eating a yoghurt like a snooty person, right?

Yeah, I guess so.

That's pretty much the only thing you can do.

It is.

And no, I agree that yours was absolutely the way to do it.

Plastic heart sunglasses

and a bonnet.

I don't understand.

But it was sort of the same idea.

Trouble bone, everyone.

Yeah, she's just a horny woman, I think is what Greg said.

Yeah.

People are fanning her and complimenting her while she eats the yoghurt.

Rosie's just being a dick.

Well, Rosie, I've written.

So Rosie orders the crew to do the different disgusting things with the yoghurt.

So she's sat in the middle eating the yogurt normally, and that's like comparatively, I guess she has the most dignity at the table.

Yeah, I mean, I do sort of get that, but.

It was quite an interesting angle in the way of doing it.

But what I've written here is, I think because of Jason and Stevie, we have overlooked what a psycho Rosie is.

Yeah, this is very true.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Rosie is a sort of constant dark course.

Yeah.

Where she is just as chaotic as everybody else, but because yeah, you've got Jason, yeah, who's just when Jason like destroyed it at the end, we all went, Wow,

what are you doing?

Like, I was so disappointed in him because he'd done it, and then but then it did make and that was the only moment I was like, oh, he's throwing it for no reason, like, he's he's throwing these things, and he shouldn't be doing that.

And then, but actually, his reasoning really made sense, and he because I did think when he poured it, it was like all that yoga.

I was like, Well, he's losing points, yeah, he's lost points,

And you can see it in his eyes as well, because he's trying to hold character.

And he pours it.

The pilot light's gone.

Yeah, it's gone.

And you can see the yogurt go down his hand and he's like, you know, he's smashing that thing up.

Yeah, this is disgusting.

Yeah.

But most dignity is very hard as well.

So I think he probably thought other people might have done something similar.

So why don't I just trash the place again?

And I suppose mine is quite root one, so that's possibly why I didn't score well.

But I do think I should have scored higher than I did because I had,

although like, I interestingly dress up as a man, but that was because

it was a patriarchal system.

Yeah, so to have the most dignity.

You were making a lot of societal comments as well.

I always am.

It was lovely.

I own so much land was one of the quotes.

Yeah, yeah.

Say that.

And in the edit, I had a massive bogey up my nose.

So when they played it on the huge screen, I was like, oh my god.

I was like, did you see the, did you?

And then Greg was like, yeah, yeah, we all saw the massive bogey up your nose.

So they've CGI'd that out.

Have they?

Yeah.

Because you should have lost points for that.

I should have lost points for it.

You should have been one point because there's no dignity in a bogey.

Sorry for me.

Maybe that's why.

Maybe that's why I scored badly because obviously Greg was he was having this sort of bogey context.

Yeah.

Whereas on in the edit it was like, well, this doesn't seem fair, but I did have a bogey.

So I can't believe they CGI'd a bogey for me.

They CGI'd a bogey.

Well, I think it was a bogey.

I think it was a bit of, basically, I think it was a bit of foundation on my quite illustrious nasal hair.

I haven't since realised I have.

And I've bought a nasal hair trimmer.

Yes.

Yes, this is a thing.

I've bought many.

I go through one a week.

They're pink for women.

Are they?

Yeah.

Good.

Yeah.

A bit more feminine.

Just a bit more feminine, for God's sake.

Mine's got flames up the side.

It's pretty cool.

Mountains.

Yeah.

Japanese stick knives.

You weren't the only person to have some help with the edit in this.

I don't know if you're aware of this.

With Matt's attempt,

apparently they said they really saved Matt's dignity in the end because the way the sun was shining on Matt's boxer shorts, you could see his full cock and balls through it.

No, no, no.

Yeah.

No.

Oh, my, that is absolutely brilliant.

Oh, my God.

I mean, yeah, that's perfect.

Yeah.

I mean, they've already like...

Man wants to get him out, doesn't he?

They've been swinging about all over the place, and then he's stood in the sun and he's wearing black boxer shorts.

So you assume they're going to be fine.

Yeah.

The sun comes out, and hello, you may as well be wearing a window.

It's Matt's paintance.

Let's talk about Matt's effort because

this shocked me to my core.

It shocked me as well.

I felt deeply uncomfortable watching it.

Because also, as well, I'll just be candid.

You know, Matt's in good shape.

Yeah, sure, good Nick.

Good Nick.

And

he's got a very

trying to think of other words other than like ferocious and rampant sort of female fan base.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And also a confused female fan base who grew up with him and maybe he was their first crush.

Yeah.

Now they're like 25.

Yeah, sure.

And still feel like, well, hang on.

I mean, I suppose he's 42.

And he's looking good.

When he came out of that, I was like, I don't know if this is going to do what you think it's going to do.

I think this is going to be too sexual and people are going to lose their minds over it.

Yeah, I mean,

it's certainly sexual to a certain area of sort of society and the internet, I'd imagine.

Of course.

It really feels like he's doing fan fiction writers' jobs for them.

The yogurt on the shoes.

The yogurt on the shoes.

Then it got.

Look, I don't want to objectify him.

I'm not saying he, look, he came out in his boxes.

I'm saying it was too sexual.

That's not fair.

But I was like, this is not, how is he going to have no dignity when he's quite ripped?

Yeah.

And he's in his little boxes.

He managed it, he managed it so

intensely.

I couldn't watch it.

I was like,

oh, like, but also, again, in some quarters, strangely sexual.

Yeah.

Like, that's being used on the dark web.

Is that what the dark web is?

Yeah, I think that's what the dark web is.

Assassinations are sort of.

Yeah, and fireworks.

You can buy fireworks.

Fireworks.

And then GIFs.

Yeah.

He'd written the word twit all over himself.

I wondered if he wanted to do twat.

I think he did.

I think they have one twat in there

is what he told me.

It gets stuck in his beard.

It gets stuck in his beard.

It's all like, it's the, and then he's also,

like, he's doing doing it so, I would have preferred him to have just gone in, like, quite aggressively with it.

Yeah, but that gentle delicacy with which he does it, which is so perfect for the least dignity.

Well, and please forgive me, daddy.

I've spilt yogurt on your shoe.

How can we forget?

Please forgive me, daddy.

I think backstage we did when if we were moving out of the way, we were like, sorry, please forgive me, daddy.

But it's that.

It's what he's written on his body.

He's in his boxes.

He's on his hands and knees.

He's licking yogurt off Alex's shoe.

It's everyone watching, which I think is the bit that upset me the most because it's like Game of Thrones, the Walk of Shame thing.

Yeah, Manny gets his phone out.

The guy

on his phone

with a tiny little smile.

Tiny little smile.

That's what that's the reaction

this is getting from people.

But it felt like a black mirror episode.

Do you know what I mean?

Yes, it did, it did, it did.

I mean, to be honest, watching it felt a bit like a black mirror episode.

The whole thing was just so.

I think that's going to be as

what's the word for iconic when it's bad?

Unconic.

Unconic, yeah.

As the balls out.

I think that's going to be...

It's a great confuser because I think some people are going to feel deeply aroused by that.

And some people are going to feel deeply uncomfortable like I do.

Yeah.

And some people are going to not know how they feel.

Some people are going to feel uncomfortable about how aroused they are.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Gosh.

I'm not saying that for me.

Yeah.

For God's sake.

And tell me what you think of this.

I don't know.

I can't believe I had this reaction.

As soon as I i watched it i had a yogurt did you i bought some shoes

that's watching that going oh actually i do i do fancy about that actually oh yogurt in the fridge but in its normal container of course

it's reminded me how much i like spoons and the normal way to eat yogurt it's really elevated yeah and he the weirdest thing is he brought in a spoon for his prize task oh yeah he could have just used that he should have just used the spoon he had one knocking around wouldn't have been so That would have been too much dignity of course.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, it has to go off Alex's shoe.

I was expecting in the next bit, Alex would start whipping him or something.

Do you know what I mean?

Like, I was like, is this good?

I hope this stops here.

Yeah, yeah, that's what I wanted as well.

Yeah, we all wanted that, yeah.

Well, and there's sort of no other points you can give it other than five.

Yes, yes.

Again, like, well, like with the

prize task, even though I was resistant because

the body keeps the score.

The moment I saw that I was like he's got to win he's got to win or one point would have been funny I wish Jason had picked least as well I want to see that I want to see what Jason would have come up with because Jason probably would have had his cock and balls out yeah and then set fire to them I don't know like I don't know what like yeah I would have liked to have seen what we all did for least to be honest do you have any ideas of what you might have done

I don't know I don't know because because I think you would have gone hard on that I would have gone hard on it yeah but it's but now I've seen that, I've seen what Matt did, I can't think of anything because that now is just that is the least amount, that is the least dignity to me.

So I don't know.

I probably would have cried.

I probably would have

pissed myself, I think.

I think that's what I would have done.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Not actually, but I would have engineered it.

So it looks like I've pissed myself.

I would have done it.

I would have definitely actually done it.

I don't think, I think health and safety would have got involved then.

I had one of my outfit.

I don't think that.

I'll just do the rest of it.

I think I might have sort of tried to string myself up somewhere in like a

hands and legs tied up and then got sort of arse off.

Yeah, that would

get everyone dressed as villagers pelting yogurt at me, maybe.

That's really fun.

In the stocks, maybe.

In the stocks.

Yeah.

But yeah, we can all dream.

We can all dream that we pissed ourselves in the stocks.

It was one for Jason, three for Rosie, three for you, Stevie, four for Fatia, and of course, five points for Matt.

But will they ever be worth it?

When he said the school gates, that was, I was like, I was a bit like, okay, it's silly, but you're on Tasman.

And then I really did dig into what he meant then.

Like, if that was my dad,

if that's your dad,

like,

there's no coming back from that.

And there's a yogurt at the school dinner.

His kids are going to be served a yogurt for school dinner.

Also, for a man who's had such a lovely and gentle and dignified dignified career up until this point.

I know.

And I remember him saying, like, oh, you know, I said yes, but I was a little bit nervous because it's not in my wheels.

And my wife was like, well, I don't know.

Are you sure this is something you want to do?

Like, is this the direction?

And he was like, well, I might as well, you know, and then he's been the most extreme.

I think,

like, I know Phil inadvertently got the sort of shape of his penis out, but like, Matt, well, he didn't get full ball out, did he?

I think Alex said backstage, it was the seam.

Yeah.

He did say it was the seam the seam of the ball

yeah

oh dear but yeah i think he just he he just loves the show he wants to do well right he's having he's having he also his brain is perfectly suited to to the this show i think because he's he's winning a lot and i think That would ordinarily be a bit tiresome, but he does it so chaotically and so brilliantly that I don't think it matters.

I think after the third one, the third one in a row, the first three episodes, he won all of them, didn't he?

He quietly said, Oh no.

And then he's like, Everyone's going to hate me.

No one wants to be the one that wins all of them.

But we all knew it was fine because we'd seen his seam.

You've got his seam out.

He's got a seam out.

Broadly, he's losing.

Yeah, broadly.

Oh, my God.

Yeah, he's losing outside of this show, of course.

And his kids are losing much worse.

Yeah, losing their yogurt every lunch break.

Please forgive me, Darling.

I've got your face all

That sort of thing?

Yeah, lovely.

Incredible.

Task three: put at least six litres of water in the vase.

You must either use bucket A or route to A.

You must either use bucket A and route A or bucket B and route B.

If you choose A, you must complete one of the tasks at every obstacle.

If you use B, you must trot throughout.

You must stay within the arena at all times and must never touch the vase.

Fastest winds, you have 30 seconds to choose your bucket and route, and that time has just begun.

There we are.

Hated it.

You hated this.

I hated every second of this.

What bits did you particularly hate of it?

I I particularly hated watching it back more than I hated doing it because I didn't understand.

Every single time I opened a task, apart from once, it said throw the water out every single time.

And then when I watched it back, so I didn't understand why.

This is one of those ones where I was like, I know this is not the way.

There's something else.

I've not got something here.

But it was the last task I did as well.

And I was so annoyed that the last task I did was that.

It reminded me of being shit at Sports day I was completely drenched like drenched through my pants my knickers were drenched because I kept doing this and then it and so I was sort of it was a hot day thank god because I was wearing very very thick tracksuits so on some of the the hot days it was awful that that was quite nice but I was so angry during the entirety of it because I didn't understand how you could ever do it so I'm watching it back I was really annoyed at myself because I did give up like because he said like do you want do you want us to stop the clock and I know that when Alex says that it means you haven't done the thing.

Yeah.

But I just couldn't be asked anymore.

And I did think in my head, I'm probably so far ahead, I don't actually need it.

Hopefully.

That's a genuine thought you.

I was so far ahead, but I was like,

I'm going to bank on the fact that that is happening because I'd prefer to live in that reality

than this one.

I can afford to let this one go.

I've tried so hard in

all the others.

I'm sure I've surprised myself.

And in fact, like I said in the show, I really needed it.

And I remember thinking, like,

but then it was luck.

Like, I just happened to pick the wrong envelope, the wrong envelope.

Because Matt got so many that I didn't get.

Have a lovely continue.

Although I did get carry-on once, then I just proceeded to open another task.

Opening another one.

You're like, well, that can't be for me.

Because I always.

I've got Matt, probably.

I always get the awful one.

They've left one of Matt's ones here.

Yeah.

Did it say you had to pick a new task every time?

No.

It said every time you reach that point, you have to

complete a task.

So I did it and it just said carry on.

So I was like, carry on and complete a task.

But once you found the carry-on ones, if you had to go back, could you not just pick those ones up again?

No, because you would throw them to the top and there were so many there, so you couldn't use the same one.

Did it say that?

Probably not.

But no one, if it did, no one else did that.

Everyone else was, we were all opening fresh tasks.

It just, to me, it says, if you choose A, you must complete one of the tasks at every obstacle.

Oh my,

okay, yeah.

And if you find carry-on, you'd just be like, well, I'll leave that there and I'll use it again.

Oh my god, yeah.

Okay.

That's just made it so much worse.

Of course.

But I also, I've been told this by

jobs and just jobs that I've done.

My agent says it a lot.

When I was a journalist, I don't really read when I'm stressed either.

I can't really read.

When you're a journalist.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Oh, I can write, but I can't read.

So, I think I also just never, I never, I knew that I would never be able to do what you just did.

I knew I'd never be able to go, oh, okay.

Like, Jason brought the pillar with him because he said, don't touch the vase, not the pillar.

Yes, I was never gonna do that.

I think I only did something like that twice in the whole series.

And when I did, I was so giddy, like the mannequin one with the game, I was so giddy to like wet, wet the suit myself and put it on that it was like being on drugs.

Like, it was incredible feeling because of how little I was doing that.

Yeah.

So, no, look, I was never going to complete that task in any other way, but it's so disappointing to watch it back.

Yeah.

Yeah, such a big hole in that bucket.

It was

fun to watch from our perspective.

Duck's stomach not contain the water.

You would have thought it would have done, right?

Because it was a very,

it must have been curved.

Obviously, it was curved.

But you tried using the plinth as well, right?

You were using the plinth and the.

I was using the plinth.

Yeah.

But.

Wait, but Jason used the plinth, so what was different about me?

Oh, he used the plinth on the other end, didn't he?

Yeah.

Oh,

he literally brought the whole thing over.

But this is the thing.

If I'd already thought to use the plinth.

On the other end.

On the other end.

Why did I not think to you...

To be fair, Jason was the only one who worked that out.

I know, but no one else was doing any meaningful plinth work, whereas I was.

So it's one jump to go, oh, hang on, there's a plinth this end.

You were using your head as well to try and stabilize the bucket at one point.

I use my head quite a lot in this show.

I've noticed this.

There's a few.

There's one coming up that's deeply bizarre

and also quite painful.

But yeah, that was very painful.

Yeah, I was sort of, but I couldn't because the bucket was bigger than my head, so I sort of sort of bobbling my head.

I was just dipping my face in the water doing this.

And then at one point, oh, yeah, at one point, I tried to get through

because I thought you had to get, you know, the little long sausage.

What's it called?

The tunnel.

Tunnel.

Yeah, the long sausage.

The long sausage.

Sausage without a centre.

Yeah.

A tunnel.

Sausage skin?

Would it be a sausage skin?

Rainbow.

Rainbow sausage skin?

That's what I call the channel tunnel, the French sausage skin.

Ah, la sausé son.

At one point, I think I did try, I thought, so when I did the plinth, we got to the sausage skin, and I was like,

I went to go, and Alice was like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, it's just not going to work.

Don't go in there with the plinth, you're gonna kill yourself,

and also, what are you doing?

Yeah, and then

he was silent for the rest because, like, for the rest of the task, but um, yeah, that was

it's just that was a really annoying one, it's just really annoying.

You stopped after one bucket, one bucket in, but it I cannot describe to you how many times I poured this stuff out, yeah.

So it looked like because in the edit, it was obviously much quicker.

Yeah, I think I was there for like between 20 and 30 minutes, I think.

Eight minutes,

I've got the eight minutes 17.

It's amazing what the brain does.

That's wild.

That felt like half an hour.

Yeah, I mean, it was only eight minutes, and

uh, Fatia did 13 minutes.

She was there for 13 minutes.

This is what I mean, but her.

She's just, she doesn't pan because I've got this time thing.

I'm like, it's too long.

I've got, like with the marbles, and like the first team tasked me and Jason, it was my fault because Jason said I don't know if it's in the edit but Jason said should we count them and I was like no it's fine and they were like fine and because I was like the time like you've got to be quick I was so focused on being quick basically all the time that I didn't I didn't um and that's a such a great example of me in life as well just like going like that moment where he's like and are you okay with that it's like this much water I'm like yeah fine that's six liters that is how I conduct my life I had to really try to stop doing that being like yeah I suppose that'll be fine like that's why I can't drive but actually, yeah, but I'll turn there, I'm sure that's fine.

Turn where the turning is

Matt does an amazing thing in this where he goes through the entire obstacle course with no water in the bucket.

It's an absolutely outstanding

because we're all watching it at the beginning and going, you've got to put some water in the bucket.

It's not like we realize halfway through.

He's like,

Carry on, woo, here we go.

Whole obstacle course gets there, looks in the bucket, and goes, oh, probably put some water in the bucket.

So funny.

So funny.

But he's having a lovely time, wasn't he?

He's having a really lovely time.

And probably thinking, this is all right, actually.

Yeah.

What's the difficulty?

Or like, we've got to throw what out?

Chuck what out on the path.

I love the lateral thinking of the wellies with Ifatia.

I think that's very...

Like, Alex's shoes.

Whenever you use Alex's shoes, Alex, you know, get Alex to do something like that.

I didn't utilise Alex enough, I think.

I think if I could do it again, I'd probably try and utilise him constantly.

Yeah, and his shoes and his clothes.

Because he's done this for me.

He's done this to me.

I did this to him.

No, I liked Fatty using Alex's shoes and then getting the wellies.

I thought that was smart.

But then the thing she was proudest of was using the gallop.

No, not the gallop, the funnel.

She turned the bucket upside down

with the hole out and went, I'm going to use it as a funnel.

Never said she was smart for using the wellies, but turned to the camera and went, because I'm smart, bruv.

Yeah.

All you do is create a smaller aperture to put the walls in.

It's so much harder for you to have done that.

So much harder.

But it's a strong effort.

She does get it all in the vase.

She fills up the vase with six leaves.

And I think

unfairly

pointed out...

No, what's the sentence I'm trying to say?

Greg was unfair to her by saying, like, you weren't trotting.

I think she was trotting just very slowly.

I wasn't trotting at all.

Well, you weren't supposed to trot because you were doing the other route.

And now you can see

that I wasn't soaring through the scoreboards at great heights.

Didn't even think about that the whole time.

I was watching it back and being like, why is no one saying that?

I'm not.

I actually one moment thought maybe it's because I would have banged my head so hard on the bucket that was a health and safety issue.

Wait, that's why it's funny that Rosie trotted because Rosie didn't have to trot either.

Well, she did choose B, but what she did was the first time she did have to trot, but she started trying to do the assault course in May.

Right, yeah, this is what yesterday was.

Which

she needed to do.

Yeah, and then she realised that she didn't need to do that.

Me and Rosie are very similar.

It was very nice to be sat next to her, I've got to say.

She was making the noise.

She was making the trotting noise.

Well, also, it was like, not a horse, and then Fatia's the only one who neighed.

Yeah.

No one else neighed.

But I think Fatia's trot was better than her jump in episode 20.

Oh, yeah, because she did it.

Yeah, she did not jump.

She didn't jump.

She sort of moved her head like this.

Yeah.

Yeah, her trot was good.

But my favourite bit bit was her going even slower and going it's not really a trot it's more of a gallop that you do not know what a funnel is and you do not know what the gallop is the fast one yeah

famously

never work in a lab with horses yeah i think so funnels stable labs okay which i think what would what oh right oh right yeah with the funnel yeah a horse but i don't think horse lab horse lab

I want to talk about Jason because this is the second time I've been genuinely angry at him for throwing away something brilliant.

Yeah.

He works this system out, picks up the vase by the pedestal, fills it at the bath, and then he goes, Yeah, I'll eyeball it.

That's six litres.

No, and it's not six litres.

I really relate to that, obviously.

Yeah.

Um,

but yeah, because actually, when I watched it back, I didn't think, oh, that's not six.

I was like, oh, he smashed it, it's fine.

Even though it's, it's so, it's that's so disappointing.

Yeah.

But, like, I like it when you see

Jason when he hasn't sort of he hasn't intentionally thrown it and he realizes he's fucked up.

Oh, yeah, he's really genuinely upset.

He was really upset, and he was upset about the pillow uh task as well.

Yeah, but I don't know if he was upset, I didn't understand because he said like he had a plan, and his plan seemed to be involving throwing the cushions, which would have disqualified him anyway.

Yeah, and he abandoned that and did it properly, got caught, and was like, Well, if I'd only stuck to my plan, it's like you would have been disqualified

because you did, but it was great to go round the other way.

I think if he just kept up with going behind Alex, I think that would have carried the like that was ingenious.

Yeah, but no, it's another situation like that where he's so close

to being smart and then he just ruins it at the end.

Yeah, um, so it was naught points for Jason, nought points for you, Stevie, three points for Fatia, four points for Matt, and five points for Rosie.

Do we know how many leaders are in this vase?

No.

I'm eyeballing it.

I'm going to say that's six liters.

12 o'clock?

All right.

Wow.

Say to yourself?

Oh, I was delighted.

Yeah, we normally think we put enough small print in to stop that sort of thing happening.

Yeah.

Frustrating.

What, stop winning happening?

Stop that sort of thing, like letting an American win?

Is that what you mean?

That's what I'm hearing.

But he didn't fill it all, though, did he?

Well, yeah, you did have to fill

Here's the rub.

You didn't have to fill it, you just have to put six litres, and he put that much in.

Where's the six litres?

Six litres is here.

Yeah.

This right here is where you lose America.

I'm just going to eyeball it.

Live task: get one of your balls into your bucket.

Your spoons must be poking through the fence when touching the ball, and only your spoons may touch the ball.

You may not touch the other team's balls, or buckets, or spoons.

You must always be on your side of the fence, and your ball must always be on the other.

If your ball touches the ground, you must start again.

Fastest wins.

Now, I'll be honest, when this one was being read out, I thought it's gonna be rubbish, it's so overcomplicated.

Some of the live tasks have been quite overcomplicated as well.

You're like,

What?

What?

But yeah, I thought the same.

I was quite sort of like, okay.

And I was also, I think you can see,

Jason is a little bit less than me, but I'm really like,

we have to, we have to do this.

And there's got to be a system.

Yeah.

And we've got to work out how we're doing it.

And it was the most gripping live task ever, I think.

I was so into it.

I was genuinely like shaking by the end.

Like, oh my God, what's going to happen?

Yeah.

The adrenaline peeping through my body was unmatched by anything, anything in my life.

Like, as well, when we got, it's when we, the first bit was kind of hard, and you kind of went, it was when we got into the, and when um

Matt and Fatih and Rosie's team, when they dropped their ball and we realized we were actually in with a shot, yeah, yeah, it was electric, yeah.

Also, it was like the vibe in the room at the time was just like so tense, like people were like cheering, and then there's like deathly silence as we both got so close, like it was really when you had to cross over that was so exciting yeah and um

i your system was the best i thought i think it was locked in i'm locked in yeah i love a catchphrase i knew greg was gonna like that got to communicate i'm locked in i'm locked in uh load me as well was another one of your catchphrases early doors

load me load me i'm locked in yeah um i just thought it was brilliant It was so good.

Yeah, well, this also, as it was happening as well, it was like, this is going to be the time when we finally,

like, I feel like we've missed out and

we've been the worst team by far.

And it's quite frustrating because we actually did try really hard.

And this was the one, like, where I really thought we were going to do it.

And it's, we were like Shakespearean tragic heroes, I thought.

Just right at the end.

And it was Jason who screwed it up.

It was.

But what do you see?

It was on the rim.

Yeah.

Like, that should have bounced in.

It just, yeah.

And also as well, in the edit, they've, they've cut it slightly because there was a lot more, or just like half an hour's worth, three seconds, of Jason going, I'm going to do it, I'm going to do it.

No, no, no, no, that was it.

I had mine, and Jason was like, do it.

And I was like, no, no, we need one more.

We need to lock in one more time because it was just too far.

And he was like, okay, okay, no, I've gone.

I've got it.

I'm like, have you got it?

So there was even like a discussion about being too far.

And Jason being like, no, I am now close enough.

Yeah.

And then it, and then he still.

Well, he overshot it.

He overshot it.

Yeah.

God, that feeling was awful.

But then, yeah, but he was genuinely like, he felt really bad afterwards.

He was like, I'm really sorry.

Well, there was a lovely moment where you put your spoons to his chest and locked in.

I did lock in.

I forgot that.

Watching it causing he's like, don't touch me.

Also, my favourite bit is when

he starts trying to pull up the fence to destroy it.

Of course he does.

Because I didn't see that because I was lying face down on the floor, just screaming.

But like, he just tried, then he was, then he decided it was

locked.

He was locked in.

He couldn't do it.

Well, brutally, that meant it was nought points for you and Jason again, two tasks in a row.

And five points for Matt, Rosie, and Fatia.

Meaning that Matt's back to his old ways and he's won another episode.

Fair enough.

Fair enough.

He deserved that.

Very strong episode for him.

23 points.

Rosie on 20 points, Fatia on 18 points.

And you and Jason, a team till the end, six points each.

So,

so low.

Like, wow.

wow.

What's the lowest scoring?

Um, has someone ever scored like zero?

No, I think we'd have to look it up, but I think maybe someone's got four.

So,

we're not far off.

It did feel like it's very hard to get six points.

Yes, it felt like a real effort and not in a good way.

Yeah, because it's six points.

If you think about it, what there's four, no, five tasks per show.

Yeah,

so that is that's one point a task and then an extra one.

Yeah,

that tracks.

It did feel like that.

Series scores, Matt in the lead with 1, 2, 3, 123 points.

Rosie on 113.

Fatia on 106.

Jason on 91 and you on 90.

Yeah,

wasn't great.

Wasn't in a great place here mentally.

Still feels like a lot of points, though, doesn't it?

90.

It does, yeah.

But I wasn't looking at the numbers.

I was just looking at my little face right over there.

It was second for a bit, off it goes.

And then I thought, you've just got to have fun.

Someone sent me a screenshot of something.

I don't know if it was Reddit or Discord.

I don't know how to get onto either of those places.

And it was where I think I, a few weeks ago, had posted on Instagram about how me and Rosie would have a white wine in all the breaks of the evening records.

And so if you alternate them, you could probably just see the difference.

And someone had been like, why would you do that?

Because that's baffling gameplay.

Do you know, like, what?

It's like, we're not doing it for the game, are we?

We're doing it because it's fun, having a nice time, having a nice time.

And I think I was having a nice time, and then at this point, I was like, I'm going to have less wine and I'm going to do better at the things I can control, which is not the price tasks because I've already, and I could, I know that this I've sort of banked all of my good ones, apart from one that's coming up, which I'm really proud of.

Um,

but most of them were bad, so it was the live task, the live studio task.

I was like, I have to up my game here.

And that is what you'll see, I think, going forward is a real steely determination.

A sober Stevie.

A sober,

more sober.

Add two wines instead of three.

That's it.

That's gamesmanship.

Stevie, thank you so much for coming on the Taskmaster podcast.

Thank you for having me.

We always ask our guests to rate their experience on the podcast between one and five points.

Feel free to give us us a genuine score.

I'm going to give you four, five if it wasn't in this room.

Okay.

Only because of this place.

Where would be the dream room for you to do it?

I always felt very calm in the lab, even though in the first episode I couldn't find it.

Yeah.

I always feel very calm because there's nothing there to distract me and those tasks seemed to be the most like, I feel like I did the best in that.

Yeah, I didn't.

Can I ask you a question about that?

You didn't find the lab in the first task.

Yeah.

That was not the first task you filmed, I'm correct in saying.

yeah because the first task you filmed was the

and alex was cooking the mushrooms oh yeah and uh you had to write the words down yeah which was in the lab yeah so you definitely knew where the lab was big house

it's a big old house oh it's a mansion it's it's bigger than the traitor's castle i didn't yes i that's actually i think uh typifies uh my brain is that i

of course did know where the lab is but when they said the lab thought well the sciencey stuff in there because I was quite I must have been like

the task I'd done before had been quite my head was full of the you know I mean like I was like distracted science yeah yeah yeah it was an early it wasn't the first day I think yeah so I think but it was very genuine I wasn't just like oh was it like I did walk into the wrong place.

Oh, we know it was genuine.

Sorry, okay.

This is just a game that I was like doing a bit.

Like, I'm rarely doing a bit.

I wish I was doing a bit more

actually.

Yeah, God, that wasn't.

I remember thinking, that was the first one I filmed, so that's fine.

But it wasn't.

No, you're right.

It was the mushrooms.

Well, thanks for coming, Stevie.

Thanks for having me.

Thank you so much to Stevie for coming in.

Always brilliant to see Stevie and great to have her back in the Taskmaster house.

I think she genuinely enjoyed visiting.

Look, you've been brilliant.

Come back next week.

It's episode eight next week, of course, Taskmaster, channel four, 9 p.m.

Come back here for the pod with another brilliant special guest.

I think I know who it is.

We've got it all booked in.

Can't be bothered to check the schedule, but it will be someone really good.

But thank you for listening.

We will see you next week.

Goodbye.