EP.211 - GUZ KHAN

I added one more podcast to the giant podcast bin.

Now you have plucked that podcast out and started listening.

I took my microphone and found some human folk.

Then I recorded all the noises while we spoke.

My name is Adam Buxton, I'm a man.

I want you to enjoy this, that's the plan.

Hey, how you doing podcasts?

Adam Buxton here.

Reporting to you from the edge of a muddy field in Norfolk County, east of England, UK, towards the very end of October 2023.

Quite a cold morning, cloudy with a bit of sun.

Clocks went back yesterday.

Very much enjoyed that extra hour in bed and this morning got up an hour earlier.

So feeling quite virtuous.

That's the upside of this time of year.

The downside, of course, is that we are plunged into a twilight world of wintry gloom.

Anyway, it's alright for the moment.

You can hear the rush hour traffic over on the A11 outside Norwich in the distance.

And my best dog friend, Rosie,

is loping along beside me in her orange harness

Having been fairly reluctant to come with me in the morning but now she's out she seems fairly perky.

So that's where I'm at.

I'm going to tell you about this week's podcast very shortly but before I do I want to prevail upon your generosity once again very briefly.

Previous podcast guest Lorna Tucker from episode 191

in which she talked to me about her Vivian Westwood documentary and about her homelessness documentary, Someone's Daughter, Someone's Son,

which features some of her own experiences of living on the streets when she was a teenager for nearly two years.

Rosie, we're going to go this way.

Come on.

I said a few weeks ago on the podcast that Lorna

and the documentary's producers have been trying to raise funds to get the film a distribution deal.

They have nearly reached their target.

on Kickstarter.

They have a few more days to go.

There's a link in the description.

If you haven't done so already and if you are able to make a donation, it would be hugely appreciated as part of an effort to bring this film to as wide an audience as possible and keep the conversation surrounding what can be done about homelessness alive especially you know at a time when there are so many other very important issues struggling for prominence.

Thank you very much.

But right now let me tell you about podcast number 211.

This one features a properly rambling and frequently laughter-filled conversation with British actor, comedian, and returning podcast guest, Guz Khan, or Guz Khan, as he's known further up north, but I call him Guz.

GuzFax,

born in 1986, Ghulam Duskir Khan grew up with his Pakistani Punjabi Muslim family in Coventry, in the West Midlands of England, where he still lives with his wife and children.

After some waywardness in his teenage years, Guz studied criminology at the University of Coventry before getting a job as a teacher.

But after a few years, concerned that things might be getting a little bit too sensible in his life, he started posting short videos featuring his character, Mobine, around 2015.

When several Mobine videos went viral, Guz came to the attention of TV comedy producers in the UK, and just a couple of years later, in 2017, the first series of Man Like Mobine, written by Guz and Andy Milligan, aired on BBC3.

The show featured Mobine living in Small Heath, Birmingham, doing his best to be an upstanding member of the community and look after his younger sister while trying to escape a criminal past.

A fourth series of Man Like Mobine aired earlier this year, 2023.

In the meantime, Guz has been increasingly in demand as an actor in productions that include the Netflix comedy drama Turn Up Charlie with Idris Elber, Sky TV's Curfew with Sean Bean and Billy Zane, Mindy Kaling's mini-series based on Four Weddings and a Funeral, and the pirate comedy series Our Flag Means Death with Tyka Waititi and Rhys Darby.

In addition, Guz has been cultivating his stand-up career.

He's touring around the UK telling stories about his life and family in January and February of next year, 2024.

You can find tour dates on his website.

There's a link in the description.

Today's conversation with Guz was recorded face to face in London at the very beginning of this month, 3rd of October 2023.

And we talked about parenting and wanting to share your good fortune with your children, but not wanting them to get spoiled, as well as the pressures of being a parent in the modern world and what it must have been like for Guz's own mother when he was growing up.

Hmm

Pheasant Alley

We also talked about stand-up and how Guz feels about heckling at comedy gigs which led us on to talking about gig etiquette in general in particular the contentious topic of when it's okay to enjoy a show standing up if there are people around you sitting down.

Now this section of the conversation included a reference to a Hollywood actor who stood up in front of me at a gig recently and the name of the actor has been left in but I want to make it clear that that's only because it sort of relates to other things not because I am in any way trying to shame them apart from anything else.

I'm sure I've done loads of annoying things at gigs without realizing.

But it was a funny part of the conversation, so I thought I'd leave it in.

I hope you will take it in the spirit in which it was intended.

But the conversation, which by the way, just so you're aware, does contain quite a lot of strong language, began with us just catching up on how many children we have.

Back at the end for information on related links and a bit more waffle.

But right now, with Guz Khan, here we go.

Ramble chat, let's have a ramble chat.

We'll focus first on this, then concentrate on that.

Come on, let's chew the fat and have a ramble chat.

Put on your conversation coat and find your talking hat.

Hey, how many have you got now?

Four.

Four.

That's right.

You were expecting your fourth the last time we met.

Is that really true?

Yeah, we met in

September 2019.

We met in a different world.

That's right, we really did.

Pre-pandy.

Pre-pandy?

You make it sound like an enjoyable drug trip.

Pre-pandy.

And then post-pandy, your shakers is open.

You're seeing the world in a different way.

And maybe that's a little bit what happened.

Yeah, yeah.

Pre-pandy would also be a good name for a rapper.

It would work.

A mumble, like a shit one.

Yeah.

Like a mumble rapper.

And I'm a cinema, cinema, pre-pandy, baby.

Like that.

What's the definition of a mumble rapper?

Someone is just, I think someone is a bit shit.

Like, but then I sound like an uncle because it's a generational thing.

This is what happened pre-pandy, post-pandy.

Should I tell you what happened to me, bro?

Yeah, man.

Last time I spoke to you, I was pre-uncle.

Now I'm full uncle.

Define it, uncle.

Okay,

let me quote the text exchange we had since we last met.

So this is going back to pandy times.

Central Pandy times.

15th of November 2020, Adam Buxton wrote, Hello, Guz, Adam Buxton here.

I hope you and the family are doing all right.

I was enjoying listening to you on James A.

Castor's 2016 albums podcast the other day, which I did.

Gave me a good lift.

Really good there.

Random thing, I'm podcasting with Paul McCartney on Wednesday and was thinking I might try to gather some questions from funny friends in an effort to ask him stuff he hasn't been asked a million times before.

I don't know if you're a fan or not, but let me know if you think of anything that it would be funny to ask him that he might actually respond to.

Wishing you well, Adam.

And

one month later, you replied, oh no.

Brother Bucks, that was very kind of you, considering I'm a cunt.

I'm very gassed, mate.

With a sort of hang-loose emoji.

Adam Buxton replies, that's my kind of text response lag.

Cheers, Mr.

Kay.

Hope you're doing good.

To which you replied, I'll be real with you.

I didn't really know that uncle.

Referring to Paul McCartney.

That's the first time I'd heard the phrase uncle in that way.

and also how did you get to the age you are and not know who Paul McCartney was

I tell you the truth

I tell you the truth when you said me that the first thing that came into my mind is there was a vegetarian pie yeah that you used to buy from Asda it was a McCartney pie Linda McCartney yeah that's what I knew yeah she was an early proponent of veggie food she was very good yeah yeah there was nothing halal back in the day from asda so we would rock up and be like, we'll have them veggie pies.

Used to have a terrible stomach afterwards.

So when you said,

obviously, I usually loosely, I was like, oh, this is something in music.

Yeah.

But you had texted me, and I could tell in the tone of your text message that, oh, this is serious shit, that you're meeting Uncle McCartney.

And then, so,

first of all, I want to apologize about the text lag.

I'm a very bad person when it comes to text lag.

That's okay.

I'm too.

You probably put the podcast out on air by the time I actually messaged back.

I think we did, yeah.

I actually listened back to some of our podcasts last time, which was really fun.

But at one point I was talking about my anxieties as a father and how I worry that I'm just a lousy dad and what kind of a person am I anyway, let alone as someone who's bringing up three human beings.

And

you were sort of amazed by the degree to which I was overthinking the whole thing.

You said, listen, mate, if they're still alive at the end of the day, then jobs are good.

Are they still alive?

i'm glad to say yes yes the job is good yeah the job is good bro i okay i can't lie just think about me let me not up front

last time we spoke 2019 they're all a significant amount younger

what happened a little bit from there is now they're like my daughter is in year eight

this is a little bit different human being This is a little bit human being who like, you know, you know when they're not in secondary school everything's like oh

you know they're like oh you little

now she's in secondary school i'm like oh what's going on there what's happening here yeah who what that person they're vaping oh don't vape and then she's like yeah but dad didn't used to sell drugs that's what uncle ali was saying i was like this is different times

You understand what I'm saying?

So do, yeah.

As much as you were like, oh, you're worried.

Now I'm a bit worried.

Like, oh, what if she starts vaping?

And then vaping is a gateway.

And now, crack.

Yeah, welcome to

being a parent of a teenage child.

Crack.

They're not on crack, are they these days?

I mean, what are the big ones for the teenagers of 2023?

They do Instagram drugs.

That's how I term them.

Yeah.

So like there'll be an MC or like someone like influency popular and then they get caught out doing Instagram drugs.

They don't even know why they're doing them.

Do you know what I mean?

They're doing them them because, yeah, I'm sipping that lean.

And you say, what's the lean?

And they say, it's cough mixture in large doses.

Yes.

Sprite.

Too much night nurse.

I've never took it.

Have you never taken night nurse?

Because I always think if I have, if I'm feeling sick and I have something that's going to make me drowsy, I'm going to die.

I think that's where my logic is.

Because you already, oh, you already might die.

Remember, mid-pandy?

People was just KOing from, oh, he's got a cough, finish, gone away.

So it got stuck in my head.

I was like, if I get the cough, I'll be just stay up.

How did you handle the whole pandy?

I should stop saying pandy.

No, look, what are you gonna?

I like it.

Pandy is something palatable.

Yeah, it makes it sound more fun.

Yeah, it's something palatable.

No, I liked it.

i like it i like the pandy i thought you have to remember bro based on my bmi i thought i was gonna die uh-huh this is real and then people were like oh if you think you're gonna die because of your bmi why don't you lose some of it and i was like

no i'll just risk it

no but then there's a doctor that said to me yeah he said to me sorry for going on a tangent here he says to me he had a 20 stone irish brother

You know, height wise wasn't massive, but he wasn't saying like five foot five, five foot six.

He said, I'll say how he said to me, he said, he came to see me, worried about his health, worried about his long being, and how long he's going to be on the planet.

I said, tell me.

He said, I did his blood pressure.

His blood pressure was 126 over 72.

He said, I had somebody from a South Asian community come here, nice muscle, very strong, very powerful.

He said, I did his blood pressure 170

126.

He said, he was going to die.

He was going to die.

One is in a shape, one is a fat.

That's what he said.

One is in shape, one is a fat.

Genetics is everything.

So I thought, Adam, after the conversation, even if I get in shape, I'm still going to die anyway.

Okay.

Do you know what I'm saying?

I do.

Were you genuinely worried in those days?

Yeah.

Also, let me explain another reason why I was worried.

Because my dad died when he was 36.

Yes.

What did he die of?

Heart attack.

Oh, mate.

Cleaned.

Bang.

Out of the game.

Gone.

What was his deal then?

Like, what was he doing too much of?

Or was it just a congenital condition?

I think it's hard to say.

Like my other doctor, they're all Asian, by the way.

My other doctor said, that's a long time ago he died.

Yeah.

He died long time ago.

Very straight to the point.

He said, we don't know what he actually died of, how he died.

Okay.

He said, did he die straight away?

I said, apparently not straight away.

He was alive for a bit.

And then a week later in the hospital, bam.

He said, bam.

I said, bam.

He said, oh, my God.

Then we don't know what it was.

you understand he said I'm not sure maybe it was secondary heart attack they didn't detect maybe something extra blockage because he's right 30 what's that 30 something years ago was a different time medically innit yeah for things to keep an eye out on but anyway I had it in my head during the pande that I was gonna I was gonna die anyway because if my dad died at 36 your card is marked game over which it isn't of course there's all sorts of you know I've said this before I think because

it's a reassuring thing thing to know that even if you are prone to certain conditions because of your genes, that doesn't mean necessarily that they will definitely happen.

It's just that you have the potential to develop those conditions.

Those switches won't necessarily be flipped.

Have you got any?

Well, yes.

I mean, you end up having most of the things that your parents do.

So high blood pressure and things like that that my dad had.

Oh, my God.

And I think he had a heart problem at one point, but not a serious one.

He ended up getting clobbered by a thing called mesothelioma, which is cancer of the lining of the lung,

often associated with industrial disease, inhalation of asbestos, which I don't think is what happened to him.

It was a bit of a mystery.

Anyway, he was, you know, in his nineties by that time.

Is it rude me saying that that is a very powerful innings?

Not at all.

I appreciate some some people don't like the whole good innings thing.

It doesn't cheer them up necessarily if they're grieving.

But it is something I do think.

And I can't.

Like, I always think

that if I get to an age where the kids can legally drive a car, all of them,

that's good.

That's good.

Because like...

As a minimum requirement of your kids to make a little bit, maybe some success of themselves, they can always do

delivery rounds,

Amazon driving,

taxis, Uber.

No, you know what I'm saying, bro.

And you could go anywhere in the world and do it.

I've got it stuck in my head.

If I can get to an age where this youngest strange one

can drive, we're all right.

I think.

How old is the young strange one now?

Well, we know he's four, right?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

He's four.

And how old is the oldest?

She's 12.

12.

12 and 4.

Shall I tell you something I never said?

So

I send her to a private school in Coventry.

Not the rest of them.

Because I quite like to talk to my kids.

And when I was talking to my kids, the boys, all of them, including four years old, they're quite like,

oh, I don't really like writing.

I don't really like reading.

I said, well, you like doing?

They said, just running.

I said, okay, just run.

But my daughter said to me very early on, she's like, dad, I want to do this, this, this, and I would like to become this, this, this.

And I was like, oh, then, if that's what you're going to do, then as your pops and your mom, let's try and do our best to put you in a

good educational setting.

Not that necessarily I think the private school is any better than

the school that's down the road, but I suppose it's like a in my head, I was always like, Oh, if you ever do well, then maybe that would be a good thing for dad to do.

Do you get what I mean?

I do understand, like, but obviously, it's so politically fraught, isn't it?

It It is an agonizing decision, and it's one that I'm certainly conflicted about.

Were you worried about it?

Should I tell you, in the most simple terms, the way I thought about it,

I was like, this is my daughter.

I love her.

She's intelligent.

And then I looked at them through, I'm like, you ain't shit.

How is this going to play on Twitter, guys?

This is why I feel.

That's as complicated as it was for me.

I don't mean as people.

I just meant education.

Maybe a little bit as people.

I appreciate your joking.

Yeah, but are you worried about your other children one day saying, like, how come our sister got that

education?

No.

Should I tell you why I don't worry about it?

Yeah.

Because I think, like, it's the chat.

So everybody in our house gets to talk a lot.

And we grew up in a, I suppose, a time where

you could chat to your elders, but then it got to a certain point where they say, there's too much chat.

Finish the chat now.

Do you understand?

So you got to certain level where you couldn't really ask questions.

They just did their thing.

They was busy.

And on reflection, you're so busy working, putting food on the table, moms, dads, aunties, uncles, and stuff, that...

Sometimes that thing's got lost in translation.

But for our lot,

anything they want to chat about, they can just be like, Mom, dad.

I don't know why I knocked on the table, all the doors are open, but mom, dad, it's out of my head mentally, probably.

Can I just grab it for a second?

This is how I feel about this.

And this, and I suppose, for me, like

the older two were used to a very specific kind of life.

But we grew up,

me, Amarine, who's my missus, and the eldest two in the loft of the house across two mattresses.

So all four of us would sleep on them two mattresses just in terms of what we were used to.

And we had a great time.

It was a lot of fun.

There was wrestling at night.

I'd get up, leg it, iron a shirt, put it on, run to school just because I'm like, oh, I better do this.

Because the sensible dads just go to work and then they come home, right?

In terms of my thing.

But now these new two kids.

I remember I felt weird about it.

I've been asked to work during the pandy in LA.

They were filming in LA.

And we got to the airport and there's barely anybody there.

And the very nice, kind lady on American Airlines behind the till said, you know what?

The plane's kind of empty.

We're going to bump you all up to business class.

And the kids are like, what does that mean?

And I was like, this is going to be sick.

And then we got on a plane.

And the older two were like, oh,

there's a bed.

Sophia and Yay were like, there is a bed.

There is movies, which is movies in, you know, economy class as well.

But there's movies that are just in my little part.

I can watch it.

There was high-fiving.

Now, the youngest guy, baby's baby, but the younger guy, Wiggy, Wiggy was like, oh.

And I was like, oh, shit.

There's a discrepancy between the older two, Wiggy, and going to be the youngest one.

And it's true, Box, because what happened is, by the nature of life going better, right?

By the nature of her going to private school, and then we're still going to a really good school in calf in the area that we live they started taking all these the youngsters is taking it for granted do you know what i mean yeah this is start taking it for granted already in that mode i was you meant to lean back and put your feet up 11 and a half hours to la

from london i was stressed the whole time i was like i

was like i got two kids who are so excited then i got another set of kids who are like

yeah normal yeah you know what i'm saying and i've seen it as the years have gone on since then, just four years.

And now me and my wife sit down all the time, like, always got my head in my hands.

I'm like, oh,

how do we balance this?

Because, bro, look where I came from,

where we'd go on a summer holiday in the boot of a Volvo V70.

Eight men in the car, illegally.

Police didn't even care.

I remember we'd wave at the police on the motorway and they'd go, hello.

Hello.

Get carry on.

You're looking having fun.

And

that's how we came up.

And then so you're appreciative of

here's a pack of panini stickers, and you're like, Thanks, mom.

You've done a big one there.

Yeah.

Yeah, you're happy to be like, thanks for 25 people.

That's a lot of money.

Now, Bugs,

now, when they get on the plane, everyone's like,

why aren't we turning left?

Yeah, that biner class looks good.

So what do I do?

This is a big, more than comedy.

I don't even care about my career.

This is a big.

What do I do?

This is a big problem for me.

So, I don't know.

I think basically what I'm saying is, I don't want to raise pricks.

Yeah, that's the bottom line, isn't it?

Just the bottom line.

You don't want to raise entitled pricks.

People who expect that.

Luxury should be a kind of amazing treat.

Yeah.

And once you start expecting that,

then

you're terrible.

Is that it?

I think, no, I, bro, I.

No, bro, it is.

And then, then just to one more tag on the end, then that's the fear, because who facilitated

that?

Yeah.

Me.

That's right.

Right?

Do they watch reality shows with ultra-wealthy families in them having an amazing executive time?

I'll be honest with you, no.

I'm really lucky they're cool like that.

And on another note, what I do still do right now, even with the young a lot, is because we're still in Cov,

for example, I was in the barbers yesterday.

Both my barbers are Kurdish refugees who came to the UK when they were, I want to say, like one of them was 15, one of them was 19.

And we've known each other like most of our lives, right?

Now, the block in Coventry, Frontline, Han Lane East, is where I grew up and had so much fun.

And I always still take them with me.

So Ye, who's my eldest son, who was around before all this comedy stuff.

oh things are a bit different now we can go in first class his eyes still light up more on the block in the barbers when everyone's talking shit and taking a piss.

And then he gets involved.

His eyes light up more for that than they do for like business class flights, for example, or that other side of life.

So I suppose for me,

I always try and maintain that balance that they see what life used to be like.

My social circles still very much hang around in these places.

And it's interesting.

If I asked Ye, I asked Ye this,

I say, Yay, bro, what would you like to do?

He loves MMA, so it's his thing at the moment.

He likes fighting and grappling, and he likes the people in MMA.

He likes a few fighters who are very stoic and earn millions of dollars, but return to the mountains of Dagestan.

He's like,

that's my heroes there.

Look, they came to Las Vegas, they took that money and they went back to herd the sheep.

Like, that's he thinks that's gangster shit.

That's what he enjoys.

But basically, he intimates to me, and this is me, he's like, Oh, if we'd have stayed here in this area of Coventry, we would be sick.

We would still be having ten times a fun.

And I think, okay, maybe I've done some good groundwork there.

Because in my head, I'm always like, Life can change.

Tomorrow, if I keel over and die, I don't know how things are going to.

Obviously, they're not going to, you don't have to go back there because things are good, but you don't know where life's going to take you, right?

We don't have your parental leaders in your life.

Whereas, if I asked the younger two, they don't want nothing to do.

Do you know what I mean?

Yeah, because they've been exposed to, like, it's like, oh, dad, and I'm like, yeah,

he's very loud.

And I'm like, oh, fucking, this kid's worried about the noise.

Do you know what I mean?

Yay, he's like, more noise.

Let's break a window.

And then the one that's been,

who was brought up in the good times, let's call them the good times, he's like, oh, God.

Let's go home and watch TD Bricks on YouTube.

I'm like, oh, fuck.

I mean, fundamentally, the cliché is, of course, and it's true, that, you know, the foundation has to be solid.

Things have to be right at home and with the people you care about.

And that enables the privileges and the luxuries to be enjoyable.

If everything is shit, if your relationships have fallen apart, if nothing important means anything, then those things are no fun.

100%.

And that's where you end up in succession.

You know, that's what succession is all about.

All these completely damaged people who there's nothing at the core of their lives, and everything is about the superficial trappings of wealth.

And you know what's crazy, Doria?

I did watch that show, I did quite like it.

There's one parallel that I do draw between their life.

It's an emotional thing, not no money, none of that.

But so, obviously,

I probably said this last time as well, like my mum raising us as a single mum then became a behemoth of importance in terms of like morality and gangsterness, because she's a tough lady,

spearhead in the community, right?

And then when I watched that show and I was like, all these kids essentially are wanting to be crowned by their pops, right?

Me and my two older sisters,

I suppose

Me, Mills and Shady, that's their nicknames.

I suppose we're a little bit waiting for that.

And my mum is very much like Logan Roy in terms of, I'm here forever.

Do you know what I mean?

So

I wonder how, if I'm then replicating that with my kids, I do see a little bit in them like, oh,

yeah, who does pops think is pish gian, pish gian, and who does pops think is oh.

Do you know what I mean?

It's weird that we think of that.

And so, for example, just going back to what we were saying there in terms of like that tractor, the things I try and do.

Every Friday night, if I'm around, even if I'm not, Dino, she'll take the four kids and land at my mom's because we don't live next door anymore, but land at my mom's.

That is a

at-max three-bedroom, like terrorist house.

Just, you know, then nieces and nephews will come, then my sister comes.

So, every Friday, there's probably about 14 people, and then everybody sleeps, everybody crashes out in the house.

And we want to do that because

we just want him to know look how much fun you can have 14 man down people sleeping in the hallway nephew sleep on the stairs with a pillow

look how much fun you can have you know what I mean like yeah yeah like

so I hope that what I'm saying I hope that's the balance that sounds good man that's the dream I hope I don't have that in my life I feel like

I didn't grow up in that kind of culture.

There was the kind of thing you're describing happened at Christmas, and that was it.

Like everyone gets together at Christmas.

That's part of the reason why I liked Christmas.

It was like, hey, suddenly you're seeing everyone and everyone's hanging out.

The rest of the time, everyone's kind of off in their own corner a lot.

And that hurts.

I don't like that aspect of.

Can I ask you a question?

Yeah, yeah.

If you don't mind.

So let's say you had the opportunity, like we can reverse, and people are still around.

And you get to go to your mom or your dads, or maybe it's an auntie and uncle.

I don't know.

It is what it is.

And everyone lands there and and there's all them people, and you're having a great time.

But if every week you got cussed the fuck out,

which happens to me, by the way, every single

mom, okay, okay, mom, you get tanned down.

Sometimes, Mad Mills, who's my oldest sister, she'll get involved a little bit as well, but then she's like a little bit in the role of a mom because she's 10, 11 years older than me.

You know what I mean?

Like, it is respecting.

What's your mum cussing you for?

Just being a prick, bastard.

Just being alive.

Just Adam Boxer, just being alive.

Walk through the door.

And my kids are getting all the good love.

And like, there's one on her shoulders.

And she's all got osteoporosis and stuff.

But anyway, it's fine because they're her grandkids.

I'll walk through the door and she'll go, oh, fucking this guy, right?

It's the energy.

And then continue to list things in front of the whole family.

About, remember that time police brought you home?

Remember that time, remember that time you were fucking?

And some auntie told me about it?

You were shagging.

You were shagging, Gulam Khan.

And she'll be saying this, and I'll be there like, oh, and this will honestly happen every week.

Would you keep going?

Would you personally keep going back, knowing

how much enjoyment it's bringing everyone?

I mean, I think I would.

That's it doesn't sound too bad.

She obviously loves you.

She's obviously proud of you, I would imagine.

I don't know about all that.

I'm sure.

Love, I think, 100%.

She must be proud of you.

But I don't know because my sisters are really like smart.

Do you know what I mean?

They're really smart.

Does your mum watch your TV shows and your movies and stuff?

My initiative.

She ain't never told me she watched it.

Maybe, maybe, maybe.

For example, I think she would be really impressed if I became Bradley Walsh.

Okay.

If I was Brown Bradley Walsh.

Were you a handful, though?

I mean, for her, did you put her through a lot of stress when you were growing up?

Yeah.

She had a lot on.

Three kids, single mum.

And in our community at that time, the key question is: just get married again.

Why aren't you getting married again?

You can bring in a man who can help supplement whatever earnings are outstanding.

She's like, forget all that.

I'm not here to listen to that.

I'm doing this on my ones.

Their old man gave me enough of a headache.

I'm going to do this single mom style.

I think I started really misbehaving like early teens.

But she wasn't like,

I don't know.

I can gauge like my aunties and my friends' mums and stuff, but she wasn't really like them.

She was much more like, Is it?

Is that what you're up to?

Yeah,

okay.

Let me drop kick you down the stairs.

Do you get what I mean?

So, I was a bit more like,

Oh shit, I shouldn't be doing that because she's really angry now.

But I don't know, like, but you never went fully off the rails.

Um,

well, there was cops involved, so I guess.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

No, we

did, we, we did,

but I was always hanging around with people who were much older than me.

So she must have worried about that.

I think so.

I mean, imagine how you would feel.

Yeah, you see.

You're 100% right.

Like.

But also, Box,

it was like a bit of a different...

It was a bit of a different time where every...

Like the guys who I grew up with who were up to no good.

And even now, my mates who are in trouble.

You could still trust them.

They were good fellas.

They were good, bro.

box i'm telling you now they was good fellas whereas now if i get asked to come in and talk to my mate's kid

which i did a few weeks ago he just wants to be bad do you get what i mean his mo is i want to do a madness brother

i want to do a fucking madness and i'm like what's happened where's he getting that from what's happened here it could be someone influences i think if i'm being honest with you the things we consume

the music the entertainment,

I don't know.

And then I saw some of these youngsters box on the block who've got really great mums or a really great dad or a really great nan who's got food ready and there's heat in the house and they just want to be bad.

That's never how we were, bro.

We never went out the house like, yeah, look at me.

I'm going to fucking shank your granddad.

Maybe that's not how they feel.

Maybe they feel

that they are sort of engaging with that forbidden behavior in the same way that you did.

But it always looks more sinister to an older generation, I think.

This is a really sensible way that you just put that.

I suppose the thing is, like,

for her,

maybe she doesn't see

how crazy some of the new

crop is.

And if she could, she'd be like, oh,

you look little angels.

Not that we were, but.

Do you get what I mean?

Yeah, yeah.

So in her head, when I grew up and stopped doing this, it stopped there, right?

And all she has to reference is this bastard.

What a naughty boy he was.

Did you ever talk to your mum about what it was like for her to lose her husband?

Yeah, I did.

I did.

She's quite, she's a tough lady in terms of even emotions, so she don't want to be opening up too much and stuff like that.

But yeah, I think she find it super tough.

But I also see like this lady who's like,

if I lost everyone,

I've got to still keep going.

Do you get what I mean?

It's a strong, she's got a very strong, she's got a very strong energy, which is

life's tough.

What am I going to do?

Tap out here?

Am I going to let it become too much for me?

No.

I've got to put my bag on, I've got to whack my shoes on, I've got to keep going.

Which I wish I had that energy.

I don't have that energy.

Do you know?

No.

I'd be crying like a fucking.

If I heard something.

Oh, Adam Boxon got hit by a bike in central London.

All his legs shattered.

I have my head in my hands, like, oh.

I'll be like, oh.

Did he get his vocal cords?

No, Buxton.

Not Buxton.

The handlebar clipped his vocal cords.

Oh, he just booked a session, studio session.

20 grand two weeks.

I'll be sad.

And he's going to have to get another Brompton

after having two stolen.

You understand?

She's tough.

She's tough like that.

So I wish I had a little bit of that.

That's impressive, man.

Good for her.

Well, long may she reign.

I want to mention another message that you sent me more recently.

Oh shit, I know what it's going to be about.

Yeah.

What was that message?

Do you want me to quote it?

Say, it's going to see.

All right.

Email from Guz May of this year, 2023.

And we were talking about, let's do another podcast.

Okay.

And you said,

yeah, I got some shit I want to talk about.

Like, I want to quit this thing we do,

but I want to run it by you.

This is true.

This is something I've had since maybe like

a year into this, yeah.

Which is like, what am I doing?

Hmm.

Because

what am I doing?

Career-wise, we're talking about.

Yeah, yeah, not life, quite like life and stuff.

Kids are great, and business is great, and family.

But like, career, I'm like,

what am I, what am I doing?

And I think, this is what I want to run by you.

I was working in and around people who would say something to me like, I can't stand the way that person's behaving within the work remit.

And I'm like, why?

And so you've got to remember, I'm around that person too, but I haven't seen it because they're not behaving in that way towards me.

Right.

And I'm like, what do they do?

We'll be on set.

We'll be like, guys, five minutes to set.

And then this big conversation starts.

They were really rude to this

person in costume or this.

And I'm like, who said you saw it with your own eyes?

This is really important to me.

I'm like, you saw it with your own eyes.

But yeah, I saw it.

And I'm like, yeah, we're going to say something.

And so, not in the middle of it, but when we had time, I was like, oh, bro, can I speak to you?

I'm like, bro, and the girl was really upset.

I corroborated the story with the person who it happened to, right?

And I was like, why are you being rude like that for and they were at them like no i i completely didn't i didn't i'm like but and they were like who said that and i was like well this person brought it to my attention and then the person came over and they were like i didn't say anything

i didn't wow really yeah

i i didn't i didn't say and i could see but i remember i haven't just done this off i've run it by them like this is what i'm going to say

And then the person's like, no, it's fucking no way.

I didn't do this.

You're lying.

You're lying.

And now I'm like, now I'm standing there like a dickhead.

and then afterwards they messaged me and they said oh just that person's really important get got a position of authority within the set and whatever it is right political maneuverings in that environment that high pressure environment and do you think that that's peculiar is that was that the first time you'd seen that kind of behavior so you hadn't seen it in other parts of your life

it's peculiar to the entertainment world to the entertainment world right uh-huh and i'm no i hadn't so to go back to that sorry if i'm not making sense then late afternoon, then they all sit around joking together and like, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

And I was like,

it really got to me like, as a as a as a person, this is not my nature, bro.

I can't, I can't do it.

Do you want to be straight with people?

Yeah, I can't,

yeah.

Like, be straight with people in a, in a night, like in a nice way, not you.

Yeah.

Dickhead, but like, in a, in a nice.

And I was like, it really got to me so much that I just called my miss and I was like, I just want to walk off this whole set.

Like, everything is so pre, like, everything is so pretend boxed.

Like, it's so

performative,

maybe people use that word.

And then it just started spreading out beyond that.

And then I suppose what I don't like too much is, you know, if someone's got a problem with you and they come to me and say, oh, that fucking Adam Buxton.

Yeah.

Yeah, always walking his dog doing jingles.

That guy, he's like this.

From what I know of you, you've always been beautiful with me.

I will never be like,

is it?

Tell me more about that, Adam Buxton.

My first thing would be like, if that's how you feel, bro, you should say it to Adam Buxton, right?

And I suppose this game and this industry that I'm in, it started having this pull on me where I'm like,

I have a choice.

I don't have to do this.

I don't have to go out on stage and tell jokes or write mind-like Moby or do an acting job.

There's loads of other things I could do in life, bro.

Like, so many things.

Life is left undiscovered and untouched.

I'm not so important that I'm like, I was born

to perform

to the people of the world.

No, don't be so fucking stupid.

I could have been, could have been a manager, area manager, as the whatever it might be.

And I was just like,

it's so not in, like, it made me feel a bit sick.

It's so intruding not who I am as a person.

Maybe I should, maybe I've done my bit.

I don't have to be surrounded by this energy.

And it just can, in a weird way, it just, that just gets worse the higher the stakes are, the bigger the budget is, the bigger the names are.

Well, we've seen, obviously, recently, we're recording this in October 2023.

Russell Brand has been in the news recently.

Oh, for sure, yeah, yeah, I saw all that.

And we are often made aware around those kinds of stories about what is tolerated when it comes to important

people, important in quotes, important to the TV industry.

Because, I mean, the entertainment industry is so weird because it is all about these very ephemeral qualities of personality, and they are the foundation of your your business.

So you get an interesting, sparky personality, and people want to go and see a movie with that personality in it, or watch a TV show with them in it.

And suddenly they're getting away with all sorts of things, and people aren't challenging them on bits of bad behavior that may be trivial and just a bit rude, ranging from that kind of thing to something way more serious.

I mean, I've never seen anything really awful happen in that way, but I've certainly seen behavior on set where you would, I mean, I've done so little of that kind of stuff.

No, don't say it.

But the times when I have been on sets, I've seen people just lose their shit and yell at people a couple of times.

And I just thought, what the fuck is that?

And everyone's just so shocked that everyone is standing there.

And embarrassed.

I was sort of wanting to laugh because it seemed ridiculous to me.

But if I was the focus of that person's rage, I wouldn't be laughing.

I would be humiliated and upset.

And it was kind of upsetting because I obviously I felt like, well, it's not very nice to see that person being yelled at.

It's going to be humiliating for them.

So it's a really unpleasant thing to witness,

especially as it's so unimportant what you're doing.

Thank you, bro.

This is why I wanted...

Look, you said it at the beginning of the process.

We only met in person once.

But this is why I said I wanted to run it by you.

Because I sense the energy of exactly what you just said, which I think would holistically improve this entire framework that we work in, is if people understood what you just said.

Say for me one more time, bro.

What did you just say?

You just said it's just not...

In the scheme of things, it's not important.

I think people become deranged by the pressure.

The pressure to succeed, the pressure to make money for the people that are paying your wages, the pressure to be a hit, the pressure to get ahead, to be a success, to have status, all these things which people feel in all aspects of life, but in the entertainment industry are so exaggerated.

Yeah.

And it becomes a kind of madness.

And this, and so, bro, this is, I was just, it's still with me right now.

Hopefully you can see it in my face.

I was still like,

maybe it's maybe it's my deficiency because I've always been in trouble for this.

People, school,

no matter what it is, if I'm there and I'm seeing, I'm seeing i'm seeing you let you let it go for a minute you're like

and then you're like

but sir yeah get out

get

out

girl i'm fucking can't get out of my classroom since since since day one it's been like that well it's good man i the world needs people like you i think that will call out that will call things out and also will be

happy to have the conversation if you've seen it wrong and if you've misinterpreted it 100 but to call it out,

to not say anything.

And look, I'm saying all this as if I'm the kind of person that would also call it out.

I don't know if I would.

Maybe I'm the kind of person who would just sit there and feel embarrassed.

And like I mentioned being on set when this guy was freaking out one time and losing his temper in front of the rest of the crew, I didn't say anything.

Probably what I should have done, and I think it probably crossed my mind, was to say, hey, hey, it's not necessary to shout, is it?

Why is there shouting?

Like, it's fine.

Let's calm everything down.

I suppose I felt like to be that person was above my status in that moment.

It wasn't my place to be that person.

But

of course it is.

It should always be.

If you think that you're seeing something happening that isn't right, then yeah, you should say something.

And you can always be told you were wrong.

That's the big thing.

We're going to get stuff wrong.

Yeah.

See the wrong way.

So, it's never been worse than that.

You've never seen anything really heinous.

Oh, no, no, no, no.

And again, bro, I would assume like a lot of people, like

someone

will say something about this, and I never see it.

But I met that person the same day.

Oh, well, that person's cool.

Like,

nothing heinous, 100%.

How do you feel now then?

Do you feel like because presumably you are still getting the occasional offer?

And

sure.

Yeah.

And I work with, bro, and not to be weird about it.

I work with grey people, wonderful sets, lovely black, it's it's it's beautiful, but I think I just suppose in my head I'm like, when you can make a choice not to be like for me, I think this was like, oh,

cuz

what an incredible journey

from Coventry and you were up to that, and then you became a teacher and then you stumbled into the I'm like, yes, cool,

but like it's not gonna define who I am as a as a human being to the point where I'm like, I couldn't, I can't leave it.

I can't start.

I'll be like, no, we find something else.

Do you get what I mean?

Yeah.

So, I can, I feel like

I suppose what I definitely know is I'm not going to be doing this for a long, long, long time.

Yeah, yeah.

I need to do something else, box.

You need to be texting me, asking me more about

Brother McCartney's and saying, yo, this.

And then I go off on a tank.

I'm like, oh, I find out about that.

Like, I just, I suppose what I'm saying is

maybe even after all these years doing this stuff, it still still feels so alien to me that I'll never really be comfortable in it.

And then, as a result, whenever my time is to be like, I'm out, see you later, baby.

No more social media,

I'll be happy to do it.

Do you get what I mean?

Yeah, yeah.

What would you do?

Do you ever imagine what life would be like if you weren't acting?

And

I don't know.

It could be anything.

I want to be a paramedic.

I know that sounds crazy.

But if I came, if you were having a heart attack and Mobine came through the door, I think it would give you an extra level of either concern or like,

oh, better stay alive, eh?

Mobin's it.

Maybe that's because you want to save your father, Cuz.

Yes, it's deep.

I don't know anything.

Anyone say you'd be a great paramedic?

I think I would be a fun paramedic.

Yeah, man.

So you're going out on tour?

I am, bro.

Stand-up.

Bit of stand-up stuff.

That's a very nurturing and supportive environment.

The stand-up world.

What do you like in the green room of a mixed-bill stand-up show?

Are you one of the more stressy people or are you easygoing?

Do you like that environment?

I never do it, Brooks.

I barely do it.

The last time I've been on stage to do stand-up comedy was, I want to say, January this year.

What are we in now?

October.

We're in October.

And

I haven't done it.

When we do stand-up, it's usually

me, one of my best friends or two of my best friends.

My tour manager is

a great lad, but you know, was a former naughty lad from Alam Rock in Birmingham.

So even the team, when it comes to stand-up, is really like familiar,

what I'm used to.

Do you know what I mean?

They're not like no one's backstage saying girls, you're gonna smash this.

That Netflix special's coming.

They're all like, fucking hurry up, man.

I'm hungry.

It's not me.

That's that's my energy backstage.

You have to do 55 minutes.

Just do 45.

I'm hungry, man.

Let's go.

Let's leave the venue.

Fucking

thousand people there.

Fuck them, man.

I'm hungry, man.

Let's go.

So, but it's that's what it's like backstage.

I don't really do too many mixed bills.

All I know is what's really nice from a performing point of view is you're in that room with these incredible people who've come to see you and you get to share a moment.

I'm bro, I'm like, in terms of skill level and learning the craft of stand-up comedy,

I'm still on baby steps.

I just like to get out there, grab a mic, and see what's going on.

And how are you with Hecklers?

James Acaster, as we speak, has a show called Heckler's Welcome.

Can you imagine what?

That's what Acaster is doing.

He's just welcoming it all in.

Yeah, the show is called Heckler's Welcome.

And so part of the show, as I understand it, I haven't seen it, is that he's sort of exploring in part his relationship with audiences and how sometimes he's got into a bit of an adversarial relationship with people in shows and sort of ended up shouting at people.

And you know what's crazy though?

Like, the first thing you said to me when you said he's Heckler's Welcome,

I don't know what the fan base is like now, but I think there's a difference in hecklers who come from the local church fate.

are you characterizing his yeah his audience audiences as church fate i'm just saying church fate audience i was saying what are they gonna heckle man like what they what are they what they really heckling my son went to see him my son is a big church fate guy

no he cats is my boy but you get you know i mean in my head that's my prejudice i'm like i know

but um and my son

who I don't think is easily shocked, but he was quite shocked by the level of heckling.

This was a while back.

This was not on the Heckler's Welcome tour.

This was a few years ago.

And he said, yeah, it was pretty annoying, people just being massive dickheads and shouting things out.

Which to me seems very weird because James is a very,

I think of him as quite a cerebral comedian.

It's not like...

very obvious material, very mainstream material.

It's sort of, in my mind, it's kind of experimental a lot of the time and quite edgy.

How many people who come to watch us perform, any of us, what number of those people are actually there thinking,

he's shit, I could do better.

Do you get what I mean?

I think there's a lot of people who will come to these shows and be like, oh, he's fucking shit.

I'm so much better.

So when it comes to this heckling stuff, I bet you, if I sit out there, who's got somebody to say, oh, Box, are you going to hear some crazy stuff?

That's never occurred to me there are people thinking that they're better.

I just think that if you pay money to go and see someone performing live, you probably like that person.

And so I would imagine that the default setting for most of those audience members is not your shit, I could do better.

It's I like you, I would like to see you do your thing.

And it would be annoying if the show was derailed by some twat who's shouting stuff out.

That's how I think of it.

That's probably very naive.

I suppose.

Someone's just trying to derail.

Derail is a very serious word.

And it trains on that.

So if someone's trying to derail your shit, it's just bad vibes.

But if someone's like...

Yeah, if they're being spicy and genuinely funny, then that's great.

But haven't you ever been to a show that has been completely torpedoed by someone who is drunk, who won't shut up, who isn't funny, and they're just disrupting the show?

And the performer gets rattled, they get into a sort of adversarial dialogue, they try to be funny, and it doesn't work, it doesn't work, it's just a bad vibe all around.

I don't, I don't think,

I don't think I've been through that, but we've had fight, like

there's been fights after geeks,

what kind of fights, like fist fights, bro.

Not with you involved,

no, a couple times, but like

a couple of times times.

Once was like

once was we I was trying to bounce from the gig quick.

Because they're hungry.

I've always established the boys hungry, yeah?

Yeah.

So I was trying to bounce.

And we got to the car and then someone's come out and they're like, can we have a picture?

Okay.

And then her partner's come and gone,

what are you taking photos of my girlfriend for?

And I'm like, huh?

So you think this

thing is something I wanted?

And he was fuming.

And his his mates were with him.

So that was copyright.

And it kicked off.

Four thumpers, bro.

Oh, my God.

And I was swinging it out.

And

what was amazing is after it was 90 seconds and then it all got broken up.

Yeah, but good bangs were thrown in 90 seconds.

90 seconds, 90 seconds box in a street fight is quite a long time.

That's ages.

All I remember is she stood to the side and was just editing the photo.

That's my lasting, that's my lasting memory of it.

Yeah, that doesn't happen after my gigs too often.

But no, hold on, Box.

But listen, if somebody's trying to, is the word accost you?

Brother, you got sh.

You got to punch them.

You got a guitar with you.

Oh, you swing that guitar.

No, I don't have my guitar too often.

It would be.

I'd have to hit them with my MacBook Pro.

You could kill them.

Yeah, definitely.

You're like, bro, last three to six years.

If I catch them on the side with the pro.

On the temple with the pro?

No, that's serious.

I hope it never comes to that.

But so far that hasn't been an issue.

My

audiences are delightful.

That's wonderful to hear.

Yeah, it's pretty nice actually.

I'm lucky.

Do you ever find yourself having to manage the audience if they're unruly?

Did you see the video of the guy at the Adele show in Las Vegas earlier this year?

No, no, it is.

He wasn't.

So Adele is playing a show in some big venue in Las Vegas and it's seated.

and there was someone

sat quite far back with a selfie stick and he is filming himself singing along with all the numbers but very loudly and he is doing all the moves and he's at the front of a sort of seating block.

He is standing up.

He is throwing shapes.

He is

and you can see on his video, a woman from a few rows back comes up, taps him on the shoulder, and she's obviously saying, I paid this money to see Adele, and all I'm getting is you filming your Instagram video and just screaming your tits off.

Standing up, I can't actually even see her or the video screens.

Any chance of you just being a bit more considerate?

And so the guy sits down initially, but then he's up again a minute or so later.

And then a security guard comes over and says, Come on, mate, sit down, otherwise, we're going to eject you.

I think.

Then someone yells to Adele.

They're trying to make this guy sit down.

And she stops the song and she says, No, no, no, no, no.

You let the guy stand up.

He's fine.

Leave him alone.

And so it caused a kind of controversy on social media.

Are you with the guy, or are you with the woman who wants him to sit down and just be a bit more considerate?

What is the correct etiquette etiquette at a gig for me i was not on the side of the guy standing up and doing his video i mean the the solution of course would be if they had a bit like on the train a quiet carriage you know you can go on the quiet carriage if you don't want to hear people making phone calls yeah yeah you just go on the quiet carriage i suppose for gigs like that which have seated areas then you have to have a designated like don't stand up area because otherwise i had this the other day I went to a show, and I was in a balcony-seated area, you know, like a second-tier kind of thing in a theater.

And I was thinking, I've got a seat.

I'm going to sit down for this show.

I'm going to be able to see because I'm small, right?

So

I can see, it's just beautiful.

And then the other day, I just had a guy standing right in front of me, two songs in.

He gets up, starts grooving around, and his partner is there.

She's filming everything, and she keeps tapping the screen because someone's told her that if you keep tapping where you want it to focus, it'll focus.

All I'm seeing for the rest of the show is tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, focus, focus, focus, focus, focus, focus, focus.

You want a MacBook Pro then.

You wanted a MacBook Pro then.

If I'd had the MacBook Pro, I would have nudged them with it.

Courtesy, any broke.

Courtesy.

Is that the word?

Yes.

Courtesy.

Who did you watch?

It was Pulp.

I don't know too much.

Yeah.

But I could have told you, books.

And people would be vibing out.

Yeah, it was a very euphoric show.

It was a great show.

Well, here's an added level of name-droppy detail for you because I had a nice seat thanks to my friend who was involved with the production.

And the people sitting in front of me, I think the whole row in front of me was all famous people.

Oh.

So the guy who was blocking my view

was

this guy called Fisher Stevens.

He's an actor.

You would recognize him.

He's in succession.

Oh.

He was standing next to Matt Dylan.

Do you know the actor Matt Dylan?

He's like one of the most famous people in the world when I was growing up.

Matt Dylan.

Matt Dylan seemed a little more

self-conscious.

He wasn't completely happy about standing up, also because he's quite a tall man.

How big is he?

I mean, he's got to be nudging six foot at least.

Whereas Fisher Stevens is a little smaller, but made himself more voluminous by waggling his arms around as enthusiastically as he was.

Apparently, he's an amazingly nice guy.

I was told by some friends afterwards, they went to the after-show, and they were like, you know, who's the most cool guy I ever met?

Fisher Stevens.

So nice.

Yeah, but it turns out Fisher Steven fucked up your evening.

He didn't totally fuck it, but he certainly made me quite angry for about three or four songs.

You've seen a rapper, she's called Cardi B.

Someone's very offended that she did it, but somebody threw something at her whilst on stage, which is very confrontational.

They threw a drink, I believe.

Yeah, this is happening a lot recently, I've heard.

And her response was to dash the microphone at their head.

Oh, yes.

And I think that that person might have learnt their lesson.

That's what I'll say about that.

So, you know, if you have to fuck Fisher Stevens up,

what I want you to know is: if even if everyone's like, oh, I'm with you.

You know who Fisher Stevens is?

Because you referred to his character the last time in the podcast.

I was listening to it this morning.

He played the Indian guy in short circuit.

Fisher Steve, that's the guy.

That's the guy.

You should have fucking smacked him for me.

You should have said, by the way, brown face, bow,

sit down at the pulp gig.

He's apologized for it.

No, bless him.

We got Fisher Stevens.

And what I heard about that role was that originally

the character was a white guy, and they decided, after they'd cast a white guy to play this part, they decided, you know,

we should get a bit of diversity.

You know what?

I'm going to speculate.

I'm going to speculate, okay?

I'm going to speculate that I don't know about who they were, about the diversity, but I think, because we have to admit, it was a spectacular accent for the time.

Yeah, yeah.

It's very convincing.

I mean, it's a likable character.

Yeah, he was just there at lunchtime.

I don't know.

And they said, fucking amazing.

Fishery, you want to do it, Fisher?

Come on.

Let's fucking do it for a whole movie, bro.

Johnny's bleeding.

Never forget.

Fisher Stevens, if you listen to his podcast, you could have been bleeding because you were fucking with Adam Adam Buxton.

It would never come to that.

He is supposedly a delightful person.

Johnny's bleeding.

It's very fucking, because I was like, oh, who's this big brute of a human fucking with your experience at the pulp gig?

Johnny's bleeding.

Johnny!

Johnny's bleeding ruined your day.

What would he have done?

What would he have done if you tapped him on the shoulder and said, that's enough of that, Johnny's bleeding?

He probably would have.

If I said it like that, I don't know.

What?

What did you say?

But I wouldn't be able to do the accent, would I?

No, you would.

You got a pass from me.

If, bro,

if Johnny's bleeding,

he's ruining your gig, you tap him on the shoulder and say, that's enough of that.

Johnny's bleeding.

And then someone else is going to overhear and tweet that I was doing an Indian accent.

Oh my God.

What could have been, Brooks?

What could have been, Brooks?

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Continue.

Wouldn't you like to be a pepper too?

Hey, welcome back podcats.

That was Guz Khan talking to me there, of course, and I'm very grateful to Guz for his time.

Oh, Rosie, flappy birds.

Don't patronize me.

I apologize.

In today's podcast description,

There's a link to an article from Entertainment Weekly

Fisher Stevens regrets playing Indian role.

There's a link to an interview from 2015 in which Fisher Stevens talks about

having done the role at a very early point in his career

when he was a struggling actor and talks about the fact that he did his best to play the role in good faith, did quite a lot of prep.

went out to India for a while, worked with a dialect coach.

I've also included a link to some of the commentary around

that video of the person filming themselves at the Adele show,

and as well as a link to Guz's website where you can find his tour dates.

There's a link to one of his appearances on James A.

Caster's Perfect Sounds podcast, which I really recommend.

In that episode, they're talking about a music genre known as Ethiopian crunch.

Whoa!

There's also a link in today's description to the first time Guz appeared on this podcast.

Back in, when did we say?

September 2019.

Pre-pandy.

Okay, I'm gonna head back now

and cycle to the station.

I'm going to London.

I've got a meeting.

about my book.

I think my publishers want to know where the book is.

It's fine.

It's nearly there.

It's nearly there.

It's going to be great.

Okay, thank you very much to Seamus Murphy Mitchell for his production support and conversation editing on this episode.

Thanks to all at Decker.

We used one of their little studios in King's Cross to record the episode and we're well looked after as ever.

Thanks guys.

Thanks to Helen Green.

She does the artwork for the podcast.

Check her stuff out.

There's a link in the description.

It's brilliant.

Thanks to all at ACAST for all the hard work they put into helping me with sponsors and keeping the show on the road.

Much appreciated.

But thanks most especially to you

for listening right to the end of the podcast.

I hope you won't mind if I shuffle creepily towards you and give you a heartbeat.

All right, mate.

Yeah,

good to see you.

Hope everything's reasonable with you.

Until next time,

go carefully.

Take care.

I love you.

Bye.

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Oh, 10%!

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