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Corey Lewin Dicklis does all 12 Michael Jackson albums back to back to back at the Crab Apple Country Club and Karaoke Hall.

Speaker 2 Get there early and buy your tickets now. This will sell out

Speaker 2 on this episode of the Commercial Break.

Speaker 2 His client is me, basically. His client looks like me.

Speaker 2 And he's talking to a girl who's probably no older than 21 years old. He's probably in his 40s, I would imagine.

Speaker 2 And there is zero chance that this guy is going to walk away with any of these girls' phone numbers. They're entirely too young and pretty.
Not the real ones. Yeah, not the real ones.

Speaker 2 That's true.

Speaker 3 And after our training, once you have memorized the process, you will then be able to go out on your own and quote, rinse and repeat.

Speaker 3 Again, it's just like me being a master chef and/or cook and/baker, etc.

Speaker 2 And you, etc., etc., cetera, et cetera.

Speaker 2 Etc.

Speaker 2 The next episode of the Commercial Break starts. The 30 in the morning!

Speaker 2 Oh, yeah, cats and kittens. Welcome back to the commercial break.
I'm Brian Green. This is my dear friend and the co-host of this show, Chrissy Joy.
Holy best to you, Chrissy. Best to you, Brian.

Speaker 2 Best to you out there in the podcast universe. Thanks for joining us on this episode number 703,000.

Speaker 2 Thank you very much. Chrissy, I was going to share with you this week that there is an asteroid headed to Earth that is probably going to mean certain doom for all of humanity.
Wow.

Speaker 2 It's called asteroid YR24, because it was found in the later part of November of 2024.

Speaker 2 And scientists says that it had, scientists were telling us that it had a not zero chance of finding its way to Earth or our moon. So in the direct path of Earth or the Moon.

Speaker 2 Now, you're wondering to yourself, if you do the math just a little bit, there should be a zero chance or a hundred percent chance that something should hit the earth not a one percent chance it was like one or two percent three percent at some point so i was gonna tell you this so that we could all freak out and hide under our beds and make a make good on the last six years of living here on earth but

Speaker 2 I just read that it's now a 0% chance that it's going to hit earth so that is good news uh you heard it here last the commercial break keeping you informed about all the comings and goings of the asteroids circling around earth just last night, I read that it is no longer a threat to humanity.

Speaker 2 This was a like a football field-sized asteroid that would have created a crater a mile wide and a lot of drama for those living in or around that particular asteroid.

Speaker 2 That to me is some of the scariest type of apocalyptic visions that you could have.

Speaker 2 Accelerationism and something coming from outer space, whether it be aliens or a rock, hitting Earth, and then certain destruction for all of us. Think about this.

Speaker 2 I want everybody to take a deep breath. Driving in your car, at work, having sex with your girlfriend, because we are the best podcast to have sex to.
And a sleep to. And a sleep to.

Speaker 2 Probably more to sleep to, but okay, if you're having sex, then I want everyone to take a deep breath. And then I want you to think about this for a second.

Speaker 2 For months and months and months, we look up in the night sky, maybe even the day sky, and we see a growing object

Speaker 2 getting bigger than our moon as every day goes by, fiery ball from hell coming toward us.

Speaker 2 And we have no choice but to suffer the consequences of certain doom, like a black, cold night for many, many months until we die of starvation.

Speaker 2 That, to me, is the scariest kind of apocalyptic vision because we will see it coming, and we will see it coming for a long time, and we will have nothing, there will be nothing that we can do unless Bruce Willis can get back on the horse and ride again.

Speaker 2 You know what I'm saying? That's the only way. And scientists have done that too.
NASA has done this. They have effectively.

Speaker 2 Yes, they have moved an asteroid off its course, but that asteroid was like many, many, many, many, many

Speaker 2 thousands of miles away. And they were saying that if this particular asteroid,

Speaker 2 YR24, A-K-I-K-N-Y-K-D-Y-24,

Speaker 2 if that asteroid was on its way to Earth, then we did not have time to do anything about it. The time had already passed, so we were fucked.

Speaker 2 Yeah, six years apparently is not enough time to get that asteroid diversion machine up there.

Speaker 2 And we would really have to do something like drastic, go put a nuclear bomb on it and hope that that diverts it, explodes it, whatever it is.

Speaker 2 And so, this for at least a week was scaring the shit out of me. I was having nightmare visions in my bed, like, wow, my kids aren't that old.

Speaker 2 And we're all going to have to watch as the sky gets dark and we just wait for D-Day to come along. That's crazy to think about.
Yes, it is. And so, you know, I was

Speaker 2 all nerved up. I was ready to, you know, go to the red light district, spend the rest of my money, buy Bitcoin.

Speaker 2 Buy Bitcoin. Create an NFT.
Create an NFT.

Speaker 2 Build that. I'm going back to Tulum.
Yeah, no, shit. What do you do? If there's six years left, what do you do? I don't know.
That's

Speaker 2 wild. Well, first of all,

Speaker 2 The earth is full of people that aren't well. And so if we really have six years left, I know that it's going to be a total shit show.
It'd be nuts.

Speaker 2 If someone came on the radio today or the tele radio who listens to

Speaker 2 someone came on the today, we've been talking about this all week off air. Anyway,

Speaker 2 I don't want to knock radio because you know, we work for a radio network.

Speaker 2 It's already knocked. We work for a radio network.
It's already knocked. Yeah, it's it's it's struggling as it is.
We don't need to kick it. We don't need to kick it while it's down.
Uh,

Speaker 2 so, but if someone came on the television today and they said, you know, president or whoever, and he said, Bitcoin,

Speaker 2 asteroid.

Speaker 2 If Trump came on today and said, unfortunately, we have figured out through mathematical calculations that I clearly did not do,

Speaker 2 that asteroid is headed straight for Pittsburgh and we're all fucked. Yeah.
Right.

Speaker 2 It wouldn't take 24 hours before everybody was going loony fucking tune. around the world.

Speaker 2 So for that reason alone, I am sus about this particular article that says it's no longer a threat because I think that people in charge may know better than to actually say that out loud.

Speaker 2 Yeah, like Paradise, they're secretly pulling people into a bunker. We need to check in with Neil deGrasse.
Neil won't come on the show. I've asked him a couple of times.
God, I love that man.

Speaker 2 He said, I'll think about it next time I'm out there doing podcasts. And that was two years ago.
Yeah. That was two years ago.
I'd love to have Neil on. Oh, my God.
He's so fascinating.

Speaker 2 Yours is a safe place for you, bro. I'd love to hear anything you have to say.

Speaker 2 You would would improve the intelligence of this show by a thousand just by logging off. That's it.
That's all you need to do.

Speaker 2 But you have to think about that.

Speaker 2 When there is someone saying there is a one to three percent chance that an asteroid is going to hit the earth in 2032, and then days later, they say, oh, no, just kidding. It's zero.

Speaker 2 Zero percent chance. Now, I agree.
It is either zero percent or a hundred percent. You do the calculations.
How is it one percent?

Speaker 2 Is it going to like, you know, in space, things fly pretty straight unless they hit something else or gravity pulls them away, right? So you would know. Like it's an orbit, you would know.

Speaker 2 However, it's pretty predictable. However,

Speaker 2 if someone says there is a chance and then all of a sudden says there isn't a chance, is that just scientists or NASA saying we really can't let this cat out of the bag?

Speaker 2 We gotta, society has got to function for the next six years. Because if there is an asteroid heading toward Earth and it's certain doom and gloom, people are going to go crazy.

Speaker 2 They're going to go crazy. Laws be damned.
Laws are already be damned. I mean, we're already living in a lawless country in a lot of ways.

Speaker 2 But then at the- We're going to need to keep our eye on the sky. Sounds like.

Speaker 2 I have my eyebrows. I was looking at it last night, actually, because there's some planetary thing that's happening right now where you can get it.
Yeah, that's not planets. That's Elon Musk's

Speaker 2 space drones. No, but although I did see some satellites, yeah, they fly.
I got this app, Sky View, Skylink. Yeah, something like that.
It's so cool when you hold it up and then you can see it.

Speaker 2 And then you can see the constellations and see what you're looking at. Yeah, it's pretty cool because when I was a kid, I was always fascinated by it in the book.

Speaker 2 But and then in real life, I could never quite figure out where Orion's belt was.

Speaker 2 It wasn't clear to me exactly what was Orion's belt. And my kids are now getting fascinated by this.
So I got the app so that we could look and see. They're still confused about what's going on.

Speaker 2 I'm still confused about what's going on. But you can, it will tell you if it's a satellite.
Yeah, you can see those satellites flying across the sky. That's my point.
That's my point. Okay, I get it.

Speaker 2 You're out yachting and you need safe harbor or whatever. Fuck you.

Speaker 2 So what do you do if there's six years left?

Speaker 2 I mean, a lot. Yeah.
Well, tell me, what do we do? What do we get to? What do we get up to if there's six years left? I don't know. God, that's tough.
It's like you need money to do stuff.

Speaker 2 You do, and we don't have it. Yeah.
Yeah. Well,

Speaker 2 first thing, I sell all the equipment in the

Speaker 2 house.

Speaker 2 I sell all the equipment and I desperately try and get a real job for six years

Speaker 2 so that I have some money to feed myself and my children. I don't know.
couple of like the last year.

Speaker 2 Yeah, for the last year of like five years. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah.
And then take off the last year, just really hit it hard. Probably take the kids down to Disney a couple times.

Speaker 2 I mean, definitely hitting up Margaritaville. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Listen. And Great Wolf Lodge.
I could think of worse places to die than Margaritaville. Do you know what I'm saying? I could not think of worse places to die than Great Wolf Lodge.

Speaker 2 That's a given. I mean, who wants to die at the Great Wolf Lodge?

Speaker 2 I know there are people that that do, but it's not me. I am not that.

Speaker 2 There is someone out there who says that's my perfect.

Speaker 2 You know, when I was a teenager and I was doing a lot of experimenting with hallucinogens, you know, that can really fuck with your brain.

Speaker 2 And so I would oftentimes think about like apocalypse for whatever reason. What would I do in those circumstances? And then I would talk about that amongst friends.

Speaker 2 You know, we're all fucked up at night. Where would we go?

Speaker 2 And all of us always said Disney World. Just head down to Disney World, spend a couple of weeks, and then just let the let the warm water of death wash over you, right?

Speaker 2 Because it's a cool place, it's happy, you got roller coasters, you know, Mickey, Mickey Head and Pretzels, and those ice creams you can only buy down there. That pineapple dole whip, that dull whip.

Speaker 2 I want a dull whip before I die. So that seems like a cool place, but a beach seems like a great place.
Oh, yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 2 I mean, if you're going to be in the shadow of an asteroid and fiery ball from hell coming at you, you know, be on the beach. Party in the woods except on the beach.

Speaker 2 Party in the woods except on the beach. Everybody's naked.
Bonfires everywhere.

Speaker 2 Bongos

Speaker 2 being played. Driving you fucking bananas.
You can't sleep because of all the bongo playing. Lots of ayahuasca.
I mean, you got to have DMT if that, you know. Yeah.
But I think I'd probably...

Speaker 2 I think I'd probably pass on the hallucinogens if I actually knew that at the end was near. That might fuck with your head.

Speaker 2 Yeah, that's going to just fuck with, it's already going to fuck with my head. But then it's going to fuck with my head even more if I'm all fucked up.

Speaker 2 So, yeah i'm cashing out everything and i'm just living high on the hog but then you wonder like okay isn't everybody else also going to do that and then what about the people who make these places so special the people who work at disney or the resorts or your favorite beach that are bringing you those fruity cocktails with umbrellas if they know in mere moments our money's going to be no good why am i working Why is everybody else doing this?

Speaker 2 And I'm working for these people. I don't know that I'm going to certainly, you know, so it's a tricky proposition.
It really is. It was six years to think about it.

Speaker 2 Like, I think if you had a week, that's one thing. But six years,

Speaker 2 you got to thoughtfully plan. If you knew the day you were going to die,

Speaker 2 if you could know that day, would you want to know that day?

Speaker 2 I thought about that before. It's a really fascinating question with so many twists and turns.

Speaker 2 I think no. I think no too.

Speaker 2 But then I guess you could really plan. If you knew the day you were going to die, there could be, you could have lots, you could say your goodbyes.

Speaker 2 You could make sure that everything was buttoned up. You could make sure your family was taken care of.
Those last things you wanted to do were, you know, you had done.

Speaker 2 You could plan your party. You could plan your own funeral.
Yep. I've already planned my own funeral.
If I die tomorrow, don't make a stink. Have a fucking party.
Just have a party.

Speaker 2 That's all I'm asking. Don't make a stink.
Me too. That's what I want.
Have a party. I doubt many tears are going to be shed, but you know, if anybody starts to cry, I'll bring in Teresa Caputo.

Speaker 2 Oh, Teresa Caputo's got to be there because she's got to figure out our secret word that we can't remember. Nope.
Nope.

Speaker 2 I think at one time it was Henry Fonda. It was Henry Fonda.

Speaker 2 Now we need to update it. Yes.
Change password.

Speaker 2 Change password. Please update your password.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I think that's a complicated question with so many different,

Speaker 2 like there are

Speaker 2 causes and effects to knowing the day that you're going to die. And one of them is like if someone said, hey, Brian, you're going to die next month.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 I would be freaking out, absolutely freaking out.

Speaker 2 But then I would do my best to get everything done that I needed to get done, make sure that my family was okay and everything was going to be fine, say my goodbyes. But I'd also be incredibly sad.

Speaker 2 I'd think about all the things that I'm going to miss. If someone says you're going to die at 89 years old, well, then I just, you know, make sure I live the best life that I can until such day.

Speaker 2 The problem is, if you could know the day that you die, you you can't control the day that you die. So if I can't change it, then what am I going to do? I might as well just not know.
That way,

Speaker 2 I go blissfully unaware into the night, as I always do,

Speaker 2 going to sleep, my blood pressure 200 over 70,000, just hoping that my ticker is still kicking at the night.

Speaker 2 That's all you can do. That's all I can do.
I mean, it's all those, you know, Instagram quotes that we hear. That's right.
Live every day to the fullest. Yes.
Live every day to the fullest.

Speaker 2 You never know

Speaker 2 when this day, if this day will be your last. Love, laugh, live.
Here's my nipple. Dance.
Yes. Here's my double E's.

Speaker 2 There's my thong. Live, laugh, love, labia.

Speaker 2 That should be a sane. Cherish every day as if it was your last.
I bleached my asshole. Take a look.

Speaker 2 Lincoln bio. Lincoln bio.
Lincoln bio.

Speaker 2 D-Y. D-Y.

Speaker 2 Yeah. I mean,

Speaker 2 your life becomes a trope at that point. You just got to do what you got to do.
It is what it is. It is what it is.
The heart wants what the heart wants. The heart wants what the heart wants.

Speaker 2 And the heart wants to live a couple more days.

Speaker 2 Please. Yeah, they say bargaining is part of grieving.
I'd probably bargain.

Speaker 2 Like, please, just give me like, you know, if someone said you're going to die next month, I'd be like, give me another month. Like, can I have another month? I'll be really good.
I promise.

Speaker 2 I'll stop doing the commercial break. I promise I will.
No more commercial break.

Speaker 2 Yes. So part of me thinks that, I mean, listen, I am not like the most

Speaker 2 skeptical

Speaker 2 media

Speaker 2 watcher in the world. I don't think that everything is a lie or a conspiracy or whatever.
I think that stories are manipulated. I think that PR people are, yeah, I think the PR people do their job.

Speaker 2 The media does their job of slanting the conversation one way or the other to suit whatever agenda they happen to have personally, organizationally.

Speaker 2 But this one gives me a little bit of pause because for weeks, even Neil deGrasse Tyson was addressing this. He said, listen, and he's the one who said there is a 0 or 100% chance.

Speaker 2 We just don't know what that is yet. Right.
He's like, so don't everyone freak out because eventually we'll know. But he said, By next year, we'll know if it's zero or 100% chance.

Speaker 2 How did they figure that out so quick? If Neil deGrasse deGrasse Tyson, one of the smartest human beings that lives during my lifetime, said it's going to take a year for us to figure this out.

Speaker 2 When this asteroid gets on the other side of the sun, we'll figure it out. Then how did they figure it out in just a couple of days? And why are they now pushing out this particular story?

Speaker 2 Is that true? Or is there a bunker being built somewhere?

Speaker 2 I don't know. I think it's definitely not going to be in.
I think they just fired everybody at that agency. Yeah, that's true.
That's the other thing.

Speaker 2 I said, hey, it's not happening anymore, people. How do we know if no one is actually working? How do we know if no one's working at those agencies? That's why we need these people.

Speaker 2 Lifelong public servants and bureaucrats sometimes do serve a purpose. I'm all about smaller government.
Trust me. I am.

Speaker 2 I don't need every, I don't need to fill out a form for everything that I do in my life and have someone breathing down my neck about every time I, you know, shit or send a zelle to my cousin.

Speaker 2 I don't need that. However, some of these people, lifelong public servants, serve a purpose.

Speaker 2 And there's like this reel going around about people who have been recently fired by doji or whatever the fuck we're calling it these days. A lot of people just quit too.

Speaker 2 Well, a bunch of people quit doge because they didn't agree with whatever Musk was telling them to do. And so there's this reel going around.
It's like 20 different people.

Speaker 2 The reel is about two minutes long, and they are fired. And they were explaining what they do in government.
One guy was like, I clean up the trash at Yosemite so that you don't have to see

Speaker 2 dirty diapers. Yeah.
So you don't have to see dirty diapers and fast food trash bags when you're driving in Yosemite.

Speaker 2 And the next person was like, I make sure the children get lunches for da-da-da-da, and whatever it was. These people are serving small but significant purposes inside.

Speaker 2 And all those little, small things end up being big things. Can we have a review? I agree with smaller government.
Can we have a review, a process by which we go, is this, do we need this?

Speaker 2 Do we need this? Is this effective? Is it efficient?

Speaker 2 And then make a decision, but at least give people, at least give an opportunity to these organizations and these governmental bureaucracies to justify their existence and then let us all know why we have these people around.

Speaker 2 And then we go, oh, okay, they serve a purpose. Let's do that.

Speaker 2 I think

Speaker 2 that would be a good way to go about it. That's a big review.

Speaker 2 Yeah, but Doji's just taking a chainsaw because I believe that this is part of a movement called accelerationism, where some very rich people and some other influential behind-the-scenes people believe that society is breaking down anyway, and they want to accelerate it to get over the hump and create an AI-lit,

Speaker 2 AI-driven one world, right? This is called accelerationism. Look it up.
And I think, I don't know, but I think. No one wants to look it up.
I don't know. No one wants to look it up.

Speaker 2 That's the thing is that no one fucking agrees with it except for a couple of loony tunes who happen to be billionaires and running AI companies. Like, this is super dangerous.

Speaker 2 But we're all, I mean, I guess we're not all rolling around because I see these town halls, one of which happened happened here near where I live, and it made national news.

Speaker 2 Nice follow that, like many national news things. So people are questioning what's going on.

Speaker 2 But yeah, there's 20 young kids just, or I don't know if they're young kids, but 20 kids just quit that doji program because they said, probably because their mom or dad called them and were like, what are you doing?

Speaker 2 What in the fuck are you kidding? Go get a real job. Go to Silicon Valley where the rest of the people are with your kind of skill set.
Go do something good with your life.

Speaker 2 And then because Musk cannot get a security clearance and because he was not born here in the United States, and because, because, because, because, because, because there's even questions about whether or not he actually is a citizen, uh, they can't actually appoint him to the head of Doge.

Speaker 2 So they appointed someone else the head of Doge. Did you see that? Yeah, I did see that.
And it's some lady running it.

Speaker 2 Yeah, and it's some lady who, her entire social media is about her kids and, you know, treating kids with certain conditions and disease as well.

Speaker 2 And she seems like a perfectly reasonable, lovely lady who's on vacation in Mexico for three weeks and no one can get a hold of her. So it's like they just like pointed the finger and

Speaker 2 you do it. Yeah, you do it.

Speaker 2 He'll call you and tell you what. He'll tweet at you, exit you, whatever you call it, and you do it.
It's unbelievable. What the fuck is going on? I don't know.
I don't know either. This is one.

Speaker 2 bad episode of the commercial break. There is more organization at commercial break LLC than there is in the current administration.

Speaker 2 And that is saying something because this is probably the worst organization in the history of LLCs. I'm telling you that right now.
No doubt about it. All right, let's do this.

Speaker 2 I don't want to get on the ramp because people hate when I get on it. Well, some people like it, but

Speaker 2 you know,

Speaker 2 some people like it, but those are the only people that are still listening. Since our numbers are going down and not up, let's take a break.

Speaker 2 I'll take a deep breath and we'll get to what we really enjoy doing: making fun of pickup artists. Oh, yes.
We'll be back.

Speaker 4 Hey, it's Rachel, your new voice of God here on TCB. And just like you, I'm wondering just how much longer this podcast can continue.

Speaker 4 Let's all rejoice that another episode has made it to your ears, and I'll rejoice that my check is in the mail.

Speaker 4 Speaking of mail, get your free TCB sticker in the mail by going to tcbpodcast.com and visiting the contact us page.

Speaker 4 You can also find the entire commercial break library, audio and video, just in case you want to look at Chrissy, at tcbpodcasts.com. Want your voice to be on an episode of the show?

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Tell us how much you love us, and we'll be sure to let the world know on a future episode. Or you can make fun of us.
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Speaker 4 Now I'm going to go check the mailbox for payment while you check out our sponsors, and then we'll return to this episode of the commercial break.

Speaker 1 This episode is sponsored by our longtime sponsor, Squarespace. I am working on a new project, Information TBD.
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Speaker 5 This is Free Range with Von Miller, the podcast where I step outside the lines and I take you with me.

Speaker 5 Each week, we're talking everything from the biggest stories around the league to the biggest stories off the field. This isn't your average sports podcast.

Speaker 5 This is game meets culture, locking room meets living room, and no topic is off limits.

Speaker 5 So if you're into good conversations that ruffle a few feathers, join me every Wednesday and follow Free Range with Von Miller everywhere you get your podcast.

Speaker 1 This episode is sponsored in part by Rula. You know, there was a time when I really needed therapy, but I could not find a therapist who took my insurance.

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Speaker 1 You deserve mental health care that works with you, not against your budget.

Speaker 2 Okay, all right.

Speaker 2 Off our doji and on to our PUAs, Chrissy. I'm strolling on the internet.
As you do. As I do like to do.

Speaker 2 And you know, because of my search history on YouTube, I have an eclectic mix of things that will come up. The algorithm.
The algorithm.

Speaker 2 I'm telling you, national treasure. My search history on that computer and my search history on YouTube and Instagram, national treasure.
National treasure. Why? I don't know.

Speaker 2 But if you're into bikinis and crazy people, you're going to love my search history. So I'm sure.
I don't love those two things.

Speaker 2 Well, I mean, I am a boy. Here's the thing.
Somebody put out a reel the other day. Here's the thing.
Here's the thing. I'm justifying my bikini watching.
Here's the thing.

Speaker 2 I'm putting on, I'm flipping through Instagram the other day, and there is a gentleman. And he says, Instagram is so rigged.
The algorithm is so rigged toward racy content for any male.

Speaker 2 And I'm going to prove to you why. So then he explains that he's got three different Instagram accounts, his personal, his business, and then a FinSTA, a fake Instagram account that he can use.

Speaker 2 I forgot why he explains he can use it. It probably to stalk his ex-girlfriend or or whatever.
But, you know, probably for nefarious purposes.

Speaker 2 But he explains this and he says, in all three of those, I, you know, it's me that owns the account. So they know that I'm male.
They know that I am

Speaker 2 attracted to women. They must, right?

Speaker 2 He goes, anytime that I go to search on my business, on my personal, or on my FinSA, all of the pictures that pull up are half-naked women, women in bikinis, or some other kind of racy content.

Speaker 2 He's like, on my

Speaker 2 business account, I have never, not once searched for anything like sex related, right? Never, not once.

Speaker 2 And he says that I did an informal poll amongst my guy friends, and they all say the same thing is on Instagram. When they search, all that gets shown is pictures of girls in bikinis.

Speaker 2 And so while Instagram purports to not want this content on, you know, it's not that they don't want the content, but they don't promote that kind of content.

Speaker 2 Every guy out there there seems to be getting the same content, which is bikinis. So, do you believe me, Astrid?

Speaker 2 Right.

Speaker 2 Okay. I was trolling on the internet.
As you do. As I do.
And I found a new PUA for us to talk about. He's giving a one-and-a-half, we're not going to go through all one and a half hours.

Speaker 2 Maybe we will. I don't know.
He's giving a one-and-a-half-hour course on how to pick up women, as they often do. He's got kind of a new spin on it.
He's got a little bit of a different spin.

Speaker 2 This is a little bit of a different spin. It's not far off from what we hear on on other pickup artists in the community.

Speaker 2 Really?

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 Sticky eyes.

Speaker 2 You're giving me the sticky eye. Ah, the sticky eye.
Okay, let's take a listen to this guy.

Speaker 2 Oh, Christina, will you? There you go. I mean, Tina.

Speaker 2 Tina.

Speaker 2 Well, your name is... No, it's okay.

Speaker 3 There you go. You're just approaching women.
It's about building.

Speaker 2 Old habits die hard.

Speaker 2 Old habits die hard. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry to Christina and to Tina. I apologize.
I mean, her name is Christina, but we call her Tina. Right.

Speaker 3 A life worthy of attracting those beautiful women. And when you get so good at this game, you won't even have to approach women.
You will just become the man

Speaker 3 and women will come to you.

Speaker 2 You're going to be a pussy magnet. You're going to be the man, and women will come towards you.
You ever gotten a magnet from? Oh, my God, his shirt. Do you see what it says?

Speaker 2 It It says, no wife, happy life. That's right, Chrissy.
No wife, happy life. That's how we do it.
You ever gotten a new magnet from the dry cleaner or something like that?

Speaker 2 And you go and you just throw it on your refrigerator and it sticks. It's a game you play.
That's what happens when you become the man and you are officially a pussy magnet.

Speaker 2 Labia literally stuck on your face.

Speaker 3 Flip the whole game on him. Now you're not the guy running around doing pickup lines.
Now you're the guy sitting back controlling things. And women are like, who is that guy?

Speaker 3 I want to get to know him.

Speaker 2 Who's that guy with the whiteboard behind him? Who's that guy with the whiteboard and a overly wordy poster next to him? What is that? I don't know.

Speaker 2 When you're not working your game, remember, someone somewhere is working on their game. And when your dream girl shows up, he will get her, says Ryan Jamanez, master pick of our master.
Master.

Speaker 2 Yeah, Gina was asking, like, what gives them the qualification of master? Well, I think it's the Spider-Man tattoo on his elbow.

Speaker 2 I think that gives you the master. That's it.
It says master all over it.

Speaker 3 And then you get the women chasing you. Let me say that again.
Don't focus on what?

Speaker 2 The goal. That lettering is so tiny.
You get it. This is the worst PowerPoint presentation in the history of PowerPoint presentations because it's not even PowerPoint.
It is literally a poster board.

Speaker 2 So let me give you a little. Here we are.
Yeah, I'm trying to figure out what's happening.

Speaker 2 Ryan here is a a tatted up guy. Fine, whatever.
Lots of people have tattoos. I like tattoos.
I think he has a tattoo of a kiss on his neck. He does have a tattoo of a kiss on the neck.

Speaker 2 That says everything you need to know. Okay.

Speaker 2 So Ryan is a tatted up white guy wearing a black t-shirt that says MG toe. Don't even know what that means.
No wife. Happy life.

Speaker 2 He's got a whiteboard to the left of him. He's got a white sheet behind him.

Speaker 2 And then to the right of him, not even in the entire frame, he's literally got poster boards that are saying, is that poster boards or is that a TV? I can't see it. I think it might be a screen.

Speaker 2 Okay, maybe it's a screen. Like a small TV.
He's got a PowerPoint presentation running.

Speaker 2 There must be a thousand words on that power, but you can't even see it because the whole screen is not even in focus. That's really weird.

Speaker 2 At the top, in big letters, it says, am I going to get laid on this boot camp?

Speaker 2 The answer is probably not.

Speaker 2 That's the second boot camp you get laid on.

Speaker 2 For $10,000 more dollars, I'll give you private coaching. I guarantee he's trying to sell private coaching.

Speaker 2 But I will also say, when I started first doing public presentations as a salesperson,

Speaker 2 nothing got the crowd going more than putting every word you were going to say on a PowerPoint presentation. Reading your PowerPoint presentation is the best way to get a presentation.

Speaker 2 It's so engaging. It's so engaging.

Speaker 3 Focus on getting laid or getting the girl. Like, oh, I just have to get laid today.
I have to get the girl. It's not about that.
It's about building the skill set.

Speaker 2 All I can see, all I can read is no refunds. Do you see that? Yes, I see.
That's no refunds. That is my business.
In bold, yeah. Yeah, in bold.

Speaker 3 It's about learning the process of how the game works. Let me give you a quick example of what that might look like.
Oh. So

Speaker 2 here I am here.

Speaker 2 Oh, great. He's doing.
We're doing some football sketching out on the whiteboard. This will be you.
You block. I tag.

Speaker 3 This is your target. right? So I'll say, hey, see that blonde over there? Go talk to her.
Go use the absolutely adorable opener.

Speaker 2 So you watch.

Speaker 2 Absolutely.

Speaker 2 Opener.

Speaker 2 Go use the UF wretched breath opener.

Speaker 3 And boom. You go, hey, real quick, super random.
I thought you were absolutely adorable. So now here you are.

Speaker 2 guys, guys, and girls who are listening out there, you, the listener, I must describe this to you. He has the whiteboard.
He has got a blue marker and a red marker.

Speaker 2 And he is literally putting X's and O's, showing you where you're physically going to be standing and how you're going to walk up to a girl. Here's the target.

Speaker 2 I didn't know that they really sketched it out this in detail.

Speaker 2 Yeah. What's his name again? Ryan something? Ryan.
Yeah. I have a feeling we'll know his name before too long.

Speaker 3 Talking to your target. You guys are kind of talking back and forth.
And I am basically rovering around. I might be here.

Speaker 2 I might go over here.

Speaker 2 He also has Jolo tattooed on the chat.

Speaker 2 I bet he regrets that every day of his life.

Speaker 2 Here.

Speaker 3 And I'm just kind of scoping the scene. Just kind of being like, okay.
How is the student's body language looking? Oh, look, he looks pretty good. Like, doesn't have his hands in his pockets.

Speaker 3 Looks like he's lean.

Speaker 2 So he's just encircling

Speaker 2 the situation that's happening. Okay.
Like a shark and a baby seal. He's going to be circling around, taking notes,

Speaker 2 making sure that you're in the proper posture and position to get your dick wet.

Speaker 3 He looks very cool, calm, and collected. Like, yeah, this set is going really good.

Speaker 2 Oh.

Speaker 2 With Las Vegas's number one... It's okay.
Here it is. This is what it says on the screen.
More bad PowerPoint, by the way. I just have to say this.
PUA bootcamp video frequently asked questions.

Speaker 2 A few things you should know with Las Vegas's number one dating coach, Ryan

Speaker 2 Juan Zemis. I think so.
Okay.

Speaker 3 Hey guys, Ryan here. If you're receiving this message, it means you probably just purchased my new PUA bootcamp.
So welcome to this quick briefing. PUA Bootcamp Video FAQ.

Speaker 2 This quick briefing, it's an hour and a half long. First of all,

Speaker 2 I'll do that. Yeah, I know.
Where they're like, this quick message. We're going to give it to you quick.
And then an hour later, there's. If you're receiving this message, you got it.

Speaker 2 If you're receiving this message, the asteroid has hit Earth.

Speaker 2 And we must make new babies. So I'm here to teach you it.
I'm Las Vegas's number one dating coach. A few things.
What makes him Las Vegas's number one dating coach? Is there like... Nothing.

Speaker 2 Do they actually have a ranker? Yeah.

Speaker 3 You should know.

Speaker 2 All right, before we get the best pizza. Yeah, sometimes worse.

Speaker 2 Any place can say that. It does.
We were down in Mexico, and Jeff's like, look,

Speaker 2 it has the best pizza in the world. I was like, yeah, well, there's no standard, I don't think.
No standard whatsoever. Sometimes we're Apple's number one improv comedy podcast, and

Speaker 2 I don't think that makes much difference.

Speaker 2 I think a lot of people would disagree.

Speaker 3 Basically, I've made this little briefing video for you guys so that you know everything to expect before we actually meet up real life.

Speaker 3 Coaching session. Introduction.

Speaker 2 Oh. Oh, my God.
What was that? All over this. This is terrible.
Juan needs to take his ADHD magazine. Unstoppable.
Las Vegas 7 magazine. What is Las Vegas 7 magazine? I don't know.
It's one of those.

Speaker 2 You remember when we were named one of Atlanta's best podcasts

Speaker 2 by simply writing out our own article and sending it to them?

Speaker 3 And thank you for purchasing my new boot camp and or coaching and or training and or one of the best in the game, says Bad Boy Lifestyle. Product, et cetera.
And welcome. Why I created this program.

Speaker 2 Train with the master. Oh, he's like the Yoda of Las Vegas dating coaches.

Speaker 3 Let's talk about a few things and/or frequently asked questions you should know beforehand. How the boot camp and/or training is set up.
Typically, all of my live training is.

Speaker 2 Mall. Yeah, he's at a mall.
This mall seems to be a favorite stomping grounds of a lot of these pickup artists. I can only imagine why.

Speaker 2 Watching my students win in the field, learn how to approach hot women, get coaching from me, DM for more info.

Speaker 3 And or boot camps, et cetera, consists of a mix.

Speaker 2 This is like a bad local television commercial. It's terrible.

Speaker 3 Between in-classroom lectures, theory, question and answer, et cetera, and live in-field approaching.

Speaker 2 Oh my God, there's like a guy at the mall, at the gap, talking to girls that are clearly a little on the young side, don't you think?

Speaker 3 Or drilling and or training, et cetera. Example: my eight-hour diamond package.

Speaker 2 My eight-hour diamond package.

Speaker 2 One-on-one seduction coaching. Learn how to pick up hot women.
Eight-hour one-on-one seduction coaching with Ryan was $199.99.

Speaker 2 Now, only $479.

Speaker 2 Achieve your goals. Date hot women now.
Learn step-by-step. 100% scientifically proven techniques to approach hot women and start converse.

Speaker 2 What scientist is doing research on this? None. Oh, a free 15-minute phone consultation.
You know what, Chrissy? I think we're going to have to call.

Speaker 2 I think we're going to have to call the phone number.

Speaker 2 Is that Ivanka Trump? I don't know. It's some kind of stock picture.
Yeah, it looks like Ivanka Trump to me.

Speaker 3 Four-hour sessions consisting of four hours lecture and or theory and four hours infield training.

Speaker 2 Or one day. And or theory.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 Whatever you're weak in, he's going to bolster that. So it's either what theory or technique?

Speaker 3 I'm eight-hour block or four times two-hour trainings, etc. It really just all depends on our schedule, and we discuss all that before.

Speaker 2 It really all depends on how much bullshit I can spit in a day. Eight hours? Yes.
A long time. Hey, listen, it takes a long time to teach these kinds of things.

Speaker 2 Christy, this is a hack that you're going to want to know. Hack.

Speaker 3 However, every student and/or client has their own unique and specific goals when it comes to achieving success with women.

Speaker 3 So every training will be custom-tailored to meet the specific and unique goals of the menu.

Speaker 2 I thought if we were reviewing this, we had already bought it. Yeah, we already bought it.
But this is the diamond. Well, he needs you to get the diamond package, Chrissy.

Speaker 2 Listen, you're only going to learn so much by going to the in-person boot camp where he'll be swirling around you all afternoon. At the mall? Yeah, listen.

Speaker 2 You can get the diamond package or the mall package. The mall package?

Speaker 2 We're not teaching as much technique and theory as we're doing during the diamond package where we go to the outlet malls that's really where a lot of women go the tgi fridays cheesecake factory student and or client for example some students goals may be to just find love or a girlfriend and or wife or the perfect partner while others may just want to learn how to get laid fast with more women some

Speaker 3 get them get them digits students may just be seeking more confidence during social situations or learn how to to manage their social anxiety in a public.

Speaker 2 This is some of the worst marketing I have ever seen. This is like horrible.
You've been to Vegas, right? Yeah. You've been to Vegas?

Speaker 2 Okay, you go to Vegas and you'll find that there's a lot of people who are obviously looking for an extra dollar or two. They might be down on their luck.
They might not have that much money.

Speaker 2 They're being paid by some strip club or brothel to hand out these flyers. These look like those flyers.
That's what it looks like. All put together.
Yes.

Speaker 3 Environment while dealing with other people, while other students are already successful with women and are now trying to take their game to the next level. Who the game?

Speaker 3 Or may even eventually want to become a coach themselves. Who is this program for?

Speaker 3 Generally, students who have already either previously gotten Skype and/Zoom video coaching and who have done at least a one-hour assessment.

Speaker 2 Hello, and thank you for purchasing my new boot camp coaching/slash training/slash product, etc. Ah!

Speaker 2 This is crazy. Okay, so let's read a little bit of this because now we're just reading a PowerPoint presentation.

Speaker 2 I didn't realize we were going to go down this PowerPoint road, but okay, we'll roll with it.

Speaker 2 How the boot camp training is set up. Typically, all of my live trainings, boot camps, et cetera, he uses a lot of etc.

Speaker 2 Consist of a mix of between, a mix between in-classroom lectures, theory, QA, et cetera, and live, in-field, approaching, drilling, training, et cetera.

Speaker 2 Example, my eight-hour diamond package consists of one to two days of either two times four-hour four-hour sessions consisting of four hours lecture or theory and four hours of in-field training or one-on-one by eight coaching, a block of two by two, four coaching, et cetera.

Speaker 2 However, every student or client must get their own unique and specific goals when it comes to achieving success.

Speaker 2 He just literally read that entire PowerPoint slide and then he put it on there word for word.

Speaker 2 Ryan, I don't know about your pickup artist skills, but I know some people who can help you with your presentation skills. This is terrible, bro.

Speaker 3 With me. Or who have already been through my bronze and gold trainings or one of my other live trainings and or seminars.
But this is definitely not mandatory.

Speaker 3 So let's talk about the purpose of boot camp. What is the purpose of taking a P way boot camp? Approaching women is a skill set which can be developed via practice and repetition.

Speaker 3 Learning how to pick up women is no different than learning any other skill set.

Speaker 2 Okay, I think what we've learned about Ryan is that he is the world's worst PowerPoint presentation skills. When I saw some of this video, I thought this was really promising.

Speaker 2 But now what I'm learning is that Ryan is just reading slide by slide thousands of words that he has typed out, and he's putting those on the video so that you can read along with him.

Speaker 2 Ryan, if your

Speaker 2 PUA skills are anything like your meeting skills, do not buy this class. Do not buy it.
You're going to be stuck in a hot hotel room, probably a holiday inn somewhere off the strip,

Speaker 2 listening to Ryan read his own bullshit with a lot of etceteras, spelling mistakes, punctuations.

Speaker 2 This guy writes copy like I write text messages. Do you know what I'm saying? This is the problem with

Speaker 2 society today is that we're just not teaching these kids how to write.

Speaker 2 This guy needs some grammar lessons before he's going to get some POA lessons. But hey, listen.

Speaker 2 Don't don't believe, if you don't believe the PowerPoint slide, believe Ryan when he says you can have dating coach technique, theory, get married, get laid, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.

Speaker 2 All right, we're going to take a break and then we'll find some actual content here and we'll get back to it, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.

Speaker 4 Rachel here. While Brian takes his old man Bladder to the little boys' room, let's talk turkey.
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Speaker 2 All right, and we're back. Now we've managed to scroll our way through something interesting really with Ryan.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I mean, listen, I was just telling Chrissy, I think that there was one time when we, Rafa and and I owned the internet marketing company, and there was a guy who came in to pitch us on something.

Speaker 2 I forgot what it was. He came in to pitch us on something.
And he sat down and he put up a PowerPoint presentation with thousands of words on it, and they were all bullet pointed.

Speaker 2 And he started reading line by line through it. And about two pages in, Raphael and I were like, sorry, this is not for us.
Just leave that with us. Just leave that with us.

Speaker 2 If you came here to read it, we can do that on our own, and we won't. Yes.

Speaker 2 And we will not do that.

Speaker 3 Number one, top dating and success coach, and have taught thousands of men just like you from all over the world

Speaker 2 how to become more successful.

Speaker 2 This video is terrible.

Speaker 2 Yeah, dude. I mean, listen, this makes me

Speaker 2 pine for John Anthony's lifestyle because at least his videos are interesting. At least you can watch his videos with their interactions with women.

Speaker 3 Think of me just like a football coach, and you're like a player on the team.

Speaker 2 I give you. Let's go! Get that pussy!

Speaker 2 Get suited up! Get condom on. Let's go!

Speaker 3 The plays on how to approach and meet women. I tell you exactly what to do and say.

Speaker 2 Oh my God, there's a video playing in the background, a background video, where there's guys at the mall that are,

Speaker 2 he's, they're downstairs. This guy is on a balcony, like, you know, on the upstairs, looking down into this courtyard area, and he is talking in a microphone, and these guys have earpieces in.

Speaker 2 Do you not, are you not automatically suspicious of a guy who starts coming up to you with an earphone? With an earpiece in?

Speaker 2 Like, what are you, Secret Service? Who am I talking to?

Speaker 3 I instruct you how to stand, how to move, how to dress, how to act, and what to do through each.

Speaker 2 I will instruct you on how to be exactly who you are not.

Speaker 2 Look at the, look at the, uh,

Speaker 2 oh my god, it's it's the um

Speaker 2 the transcript, transcript. Yes, Dave, Dave.
Arthur, let's reenact this. Yeah, you ready? Yes.
You'll be the target. I'll be Dave.
Okay.

Speaker 2 Are there Starbucks around here?

Speaker 2 Are there Starbuckses around here?

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 There.

Speaker 2 Thanks.

Speaker 2 Starbucks, see? Yeah.

Speaker 2 Okay. Hey, thanks.
Are you from around here? Yeah.

Speaker 2 Eject button. Oh, my God.
Ejaculate button.

Speaker 2 This is crazy. Wow.

Speaker 2 Good for Ryan. That looks like that did not produce anything.
Yeah. And by the way, he's talking to a girl who's running a kiosk.

Speaker 2 Are there Starbucks around here? I don't think Starbuckses is a word. Are there Starbuckses around here?

Speaker 3 To the process. Then you simply follow the directions, memorize the process for yourself.
And next thing you know,

Speaker 3 a beautiful woman is now giving you her phone number and agreeing to meet up with you for a date.

Speaker 2 We are watching in what they call in-the-field footage while day while Ryan is incessantly babbling on about his PowerPoint, he is showing in the background

Speaker 2 live footage of his clients at the mall in the food court, youtube.com/slash the commercial break. You got to go watch this.

Speaker 2 He's showing footage of his clients in a mall hitting on the girls running the kiosk stand, some lady having lunch,

Speaker 2 you know, girls at a jean store. Meanwhile, his client is balding, wearing glass.
His client is me, basically. His client looks like me.

Speaker 2 And he's talking to a girl who's probably no older than 21 years old. He's probably in his 40s, I would imagine.

Speaker 2 And there is zero chance that this guy is going to walk away with any of these girls' phone numbers. They're entirely too young and pretty.
Not the real ones. Yeah, not the real ones.

Speaker 2 That's true.

Speaker 3 And after our training, Once you have memorized the process, you will then be able to go out on your own and, quote, rinse and repeat.

Speaker 3 Again, again it's just like me being a master chef and or cook and or baker etc and you etc etc etc loves that etc like an apprentice and i am teaching you how to bake a chocolate cake for example i tell you what ingredients you need

Speaker 2 leaning on the counter and talking to the girl behind the counter yeah

Speaker 2 because that's her job her job is to talk to you right

Speaker 2 anybody in a in a service environment,

Speaker 2 if I'm a pickup artist and I'm not,

Speaker 2 this has been well noted. History will go down and I will not have pickup artist on my grave.
Whatever the opposite of pickup artist is, a dump artist. That's what I am.
I'm a dump artist.

Speaker 2 Whatever that is, whatever that means, pickup artist, if I am one of those, the first thing I am telling my clients is that.

Speaker 2 Customer service related interactions are not considered interactions that are valuable because they are paid to interact with you. Like the strip club.
Like the strip club.

Speaker 2 You don't go to a strip club to pick up a girl. The most expensive thing in a strip club is what?

Speaker 2 Hope.

Speaker 2 I hope she comes home with me and I will pay endless amounts of money to see that that happens. That's it.
The entire universe of strip clubs runs on hope.

Speaker 3 It's milk, oil, eggs, chocolate, et cetera. And in what's right.
Portions to use and how to mix them together properly.

Speaker 3 How to grease the pans, how to set the oven to the right temperature, how to ice the cake, and how to serve and present the cake with Cetrum.

Speaker 2 Etc.

Speaker 2 The name of this episode is Etcetra.

Speaker 2 No doubt about it. Or ETC.

Speaker 3 It's the same exact thing with picking up women. It's just a process.

Speaker 2 Oh, my God. So he's the more in-the-field footage where he is pushing a guy, literally, physically throwing him.
And now go and talk to this girl.

Speaker 3 Once you learn the process, you will be able to go out and pick up women anywhere.

Speaker 2 Oh my god.

Speaker 3 Where and anytime you want. You might also use the metaphor of learning how to build a house.

Speaker 2 Who is that? You might be able to get a huge amount of time. Oh, I have no idea.
Yeah, I don't know.

Speaker 2 Now we just have random footage. Now he's showing you phone numbers.
No boo. He's got no boo in his phone.
First of all, that's an iPhone 3.

Speaker 3 Carpenter with all of the raw materials. That is the lumber, the cement, the screws, the nails, etc.

Speaker 2 I get girls' phone number, hot chick.

Speaker 3 But you don't have the blueprint for the house or any of the necessary tools. That is hammer, screwdriver, screw gun, socket wrenches, etc.

Speaker 2 Etc. What is he saying and doing?

Speaker 3 Love that metaphor about the house. Most likely, You already have everything that you need to attract women.
You're enough, most likely, as it is.

Speaker 2 However, that's the most honest thing you've said the entire time. There you go.
Yes, you do.

Speaker 3 You might just not have the know-how or the specific technical specifications of how to actually approach.

Speaker 2 It isn't in a fucking Ikea chair you got to build. It's going out there and being social.
It's not really all that complicated.

Speaker 2 And I do understand that there are many people on this earth who have social anxiety, and that's they find that they would rather cut themselves with small pieces of paper than go and put themselves in a social situation that's unfamiliar to them.

Speaker 2 That is the challenge. I don't think I can help you get over.
That's you just have to find something in you that overcomes that kind of anxiety.

Speaker 2 But there are no technical specifications to attraction. It's either happening

Speaker 2 or it's not happening. And she's either right for you or she's not or he's right for you or whatever.

Speaker 2 You can't manufacture this by rinsing and repeating terrible pickup lines and putting yourself in front of women and giving them the hand and telling them to stop and talking to kios girls at the mall.

Speaker 2 I mean, come on.

Speaker 2 Starbuckses. What's that? Starbucks is not even a word, etc.

Speaker 3 What to do, how to get her phone number, and all that really is just a step-by-step process.

Speaker 3 Like I said, you already have the lumber, you already have the cement, but I'm the guy who has the blueprint and the tools that you need in order to.

Speaker 2 I've got a blueprint. It's on my arm.

Speaker 2 Check it out.

Speaker 3 Build that house.

Speaker 3 Or just like with with this uh cooking and chef metaphor same thing I'm like the master chef and you're the apprentice cook so I'm gonna teach you how this sounds like the sounds like the plot to ratsatoui

Speaker 3 to bake that chocolate cake hey you need a quarter cup of oil you need a half cup of milk and you need three eggs and you need blank blank and blank now if you only have

Speaker 3 You know, you don't have any oil and you only have a little bit of milk and you only have two eggs.

Speaker 2 This is an extraordinarily specific metaphor. And I don't think metaphors are supposed to be specific.
I think that's why we call them metaphors.

Speaker 2 Etc.

Speaker 3 Etc. And you try to make that same cake.
Well, it's just not going to work for you, right?

Speaker 2 Because you don't have the proper.

Speaker 2 I am officially unconvinced this is Las Vegas's number one pickup artist.

Speaker 3 There's no proper ingredients to make the chocolate cake. But that's why I'm there to instruct you exactly how to do it.

Speaker 3 So in terms of meeting and approaching women, when we go out together, essentially what I'm doing is I'm going to teach you step by step. Go up to her and you're going to say this.

Speaker 3 You're going to stand like this.

Speaker 3 You're going to project your voice loud, confident, dominant like this.

Speaker 2 Where are the Starbuckses? Where are the Starbucks?

Speaker 2 You get a car and you get a car and you get a car. Etc., etc.
Etc., etc., etc.,

Speaker 2 etc.

Speaker 3 I'm out there being a cheerleader for you. Okay.
I'm not saying, oh, just go be confident. Just go talk to her and make it happen.
I'm out there giving you the specific technical details.

Speaker 2 Loving you.

Speaker 2 First things first. I want you to pick up your right leg, bend at the knee, push it forward, foot down.
Second step, pick up your left leg, bend at the knee, push it forward, step down.

Speaker 2 Now, see that girl over there? Stop. Not the right posture.
Hold on one second. Change your clothes.
Change your voice. Change your thoughts.
Change your mind.

Speaker 2 Let's put in contacts that aren't your eye color. We need a wig.

Speaker 2 You need to bodybuild. I'm going to get you plastic surgery.
And now you're perfect. You're perfect just the way you are.

Speaker 2 Now, now that I've changed everything about you, I'm telling you exactly what to do. I am the chef.
Let me give you a metaphor, Chrissy.

Speaker 2 I am the chef. I work at a cheesecake factory.
I come into work at 4:30. I clock in.
I put on my chef's apron. I wash my hands.
I walk over to the pot. I put water in it.
I boil it. I get four eggs.

Speaker 2 I crack those eggs. I put them in the pot.
I get a cup of flour.

Speaker 2 Etc., etc., etc. But wait, I haven't finished with my metaphor.
I'm good. No.

Speaker 2 No.

Speaker 2 No. You skip steps.
You don't win. You're not going to get laid like that, Chrissy.
You're not going to get laid like that.

Speaker 2 You think Jeff's just going to screw you because you're a hot chick? No, it doesn't work like that. You need to listen to my chef metaphor.
This is why you paid $497 for the diamond package.

Speaker 2 Diamond package. Diamond.

Speaker 3 This, this, this, and this, and you get the girl. On my boot camps and or trainings, you'll learn the secrets of attraction.

Speaker 2 The secrets of

Speaker 2 female. Yeah, what makes it and/or? Why are we and/oring? I don't know.
I don't know. I guess it just depends on who you are and how badly you want to read through a powerful presentation.

Speaker 3 Psychology and how to confidently and strategically approach women and groups of women and start conversations. You will learn how to approach and captivate your audience.

Speaker 3 Spark deep emotional connections. Wow.

Speaker 2 What is this b-roll footage? Where does he find this? This is him where?

Speaker 2 At QVC? That's not him, is it? That's him. Okay.
That's him. That's obviously him many years ago because he no longer has any hair or all that weight on him, but you know, that's him.

Speaker 2 And he's in someplace giving these people a pop quiz. Yeah, this looks like a PBS studio, you know, like a local GPTV studio where he's giving the guys a pop quiz.

Speaker 2 If I could only read those questions, those guys must kick themselves in the fucking balls when they realize they have to go sit in a chair for hours at a time and listen to this guy read through a PowerPoint presentation.

Speaker 3 Escalate sexual tension and ultimately build a solid, lifelong skill set to be able to attract women anywhere and anytime.

Speaker 3 The purpose of boot camp is a surefire way to get you out of the house, off of your house.

Speaker 2 Are they playing games? Are they playing games?

Speaker 2 Like a bucket, a camo. A camouflage bucket.

Speaker 2 He's pulling numbers. Who wants to go first?

Speaker 2 Computer.

Speaker 2 And out of your head. Oh, he gave him a piece of candy.

Speaker 2 Oh, he's dropping the quiz. He's handing out candy.

Speaker 2 This guy is a tchotchki. Oh, my God.
It's bad. I really want a 15-minute consultation.

Speaker 3 Instead of just sitting around all day, thinking and or daydreaming about approaching women and getting a girlfriend and/or getting laid, etc., this will actually get you out into a real-life social situation with real women and learn from a master of the game, that is the dating game.

Speaker 2 Well, you know what? After this, I feel like I have to get out into a real-life social situation. I think this is the worst pickup artist

Speaker 2 ever.

Speaker 2 That's terrible.

Speaker 2 Wow. Not only was it bad advice, it's just the delivery is terrible.
Oh my god. The delivery is all over the place.
It makes no sense.

Speaker 2 And I gotta be real honest, I'm not sure that this would work because I'm not sure I could get through it. Absolutely not.
This is an hour and a half long, Christy.

Speaker 2 Not like you said I'm pining for the days of the what was the convention? Ugh, the 21 convention. The 21 convention was blew this guy.
Okay, maybe tomorrow we need a palette cleanser.

Speaker 2 Going back to Zahn. Yeah.
At least Zahn was making it up whole cloth as he went along.

Speaker 2 At least Zahn just made up the bullshit. This guy's reading it.

Speaker 2 It's unbelievable how terrible that is. Really bad.
Okay, well, Chrissy and I are going to go read the 42-page

Speaker 2 PowerPoint presentation, and we'll give you the cliff notes, if there is such a thing, etc., etc., etc.

Speaker 2 And then we'll fill you in tomorrow. I do need a palette cleanser.
I feel like I need something to wash this out of my brain.

Speaker 2 For sure. It's terrible.

Speaker 2 All All right.

Speaker 2 So bad.

Speaker 2 All right. 212-433-3822-212-433-3TCB.
Questions, comments, concerns, content, ideas, we take them all at that phone number, or you can leave us a voicemail.

Speaker 2 If you want to be on the show, we might use that voicemail in a future episode. You never do know.
So roll the dice. Gamble, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.
That's my metaphor.

Speaker 2 Also, I lost my train of thought because I'm trying to read the words on the bootcam. Also, youtube.com slash thecommercial break.
We would love it if you would. The commercial break.
I know.

Speaker 2 We would love it. If you would come check out the new studio, watch us on YouTube.
We would love it. And you can subscribe to that channel if you're so kind.

Speaker 2 At the commercial break on Instagram, TCB Podcast on TikTok. And tcbpodcast.com.
That's your home for all things commercial break.

Speaker 2 More information about Chrissy and I, all the audio, all the video, right there from one location. Plus, you can get your free TCB swag by going to the contact us button, drop-down menu.

Speaker 2 I want my free sticker. Give us your physical address, and we will be happy to send that to you.
Post-haste, etc., etc., etc.

Speaker 2 It really does cover everything, I guess. Etc.
Okay, Chrissy, I guess that's all I can do for now. I think so.
But I'll tell you that I love you. I love you.
Best you.

Speaker 2 And best you out there in the podcast universe. Until next time, Chrissy and I will say.
We do say and we must say. Goodbye.
Goodbye.

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