The Big Suey: You Bet Your Sweet Bippy
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Speaker 4 Welcome to the Big Sue,
Speaker 4 presented by DraftKings. Why are you listening to this show? The podcast that seems very similar to the other Dan Lebatard podcast.
Speaker 12 I'm sorry, I'm not going to apologize for that.
Speaker 4 In fact, the only difference seems to be this imaging. I have been tempted in restaurants just walking past tables to grab somebody's prize that if they're just there.
Speaker 4 That hasn't happened to you guys.
Speaker 9 I've done it.
Speaker 4 And now, here's the marching man to nowhere, fat face, and the habitual liar.
Speaker 10
This segment is presented by LinkedIn Jobs. Post your job for free at linkedin.com/slash DLS.
Terms and conditions apply.
Speaker 4
David Sampson is here from Nothing Personal. He is doing it every day.
It continues to grow, and he covers a ton of stuff that I do not see other people in sports covering.
Speaker 4 So you should check out Nothing Personal.
Speaker 4 We have a number of things to talk to you about, David, but I guess the place that I should start is that I just heard Greg Cody and Chris Cody have a conversation in which the following was revealed.
Speaker 4 And I want to know at what age will Chris Cody stop doing what I'm about to say? Okay, at what age will he be as a son before he stops doing this to his father?
Speaker 4 His father likes to dictate into the phone instead of texting just a note to his wife or whomever, hey, I'm going to stop by and grab some avocados, period.
Speaker 4 And his son shouts from the distance, cock balls.
Speaker 10 Just to see if it picks it up. And it does sometimes.
Speaker 12 It's a laugh riot when it does.
Speaker 4 Okay, and so my question to you is, how, when will Chris stop doing that? Like, when, is that, that's off limits at some age, is it not?
Speaker 16 I assume only when his heart stops beating. I think that a cock balls joke, that can go all the way to 120.
Speaker 10 This guy gets it. Easy.
Speaker 9
David gets it. I don't mind it.
It's fun.
Speaker 12 You do seem to, you do mind it when I do it, when we're in it.
Speaker 18 But afterward, I'm laughing out loud at the whole absurdity of it.
Speaker 4 Like you would with a three-year-old that misbehaves. Right.
Speaker 18 I don't think I've ever failed to catch it, though, and sent that to my wife.
Speaker 4 That's the gold standard, right?
Speaker 4 As a practical joke, the best thing is that he didn't hear it. His timing was off, and exactly that moment, he sends it and he embarrasses himself sending a text to Pat Riley.
Speaker 16
It's like asking whether or not a fart joke will ever be not funny. Is it? I think the the answer is no.
It's always funny. He's always funny.
Speaker 4 Before you were on with us, I think you would have found blasphemous and hurtful some of the things that Mike Ryan was saying about his appraisal of Lone Depot Park as a baseball park.
Speaker 4 And I'd just like for him to say them to your face because...
Speaker 21 I have before, and he takes it deeply personal because he designed every aspect of that, and I understand, and I'm not conflating what they ended up doing with the franchise afterwards.
Speaker 21 It just never was for me.
Speaker 1 I know Jeffrey Lauria fancied himself this big art expert and he was going for something that just wasn't for me.
Speaker 23 Art is subjective.
Speaker 24 My whole thing is pick a color.
Speaker 17 You know, it was every color at the start.
Speaker 1 I found it a garish design.
Speaker 24 I don't like the food options. I don't like being there.
Speaker 21 It's just not for me.
Speaker 20 I know that that is not what David intended.
Speaker 1 This was supposed to be a communal thing.
Speaker 24 I guess I'm on the line of like more traditional and they were really going for something that was really different and i guess it works for some people just never worked for me it bothers me all the time it bothers my ears it bothers my nose it bothers my eyes
Speaker 16 i think you feel better
Speaker 16 i mean i'm sorry to do that to you again but no i'm just asking like i i'm hoping i want you in light of the irresponsible journalism that happened and befell the show about mental illness.
Speaker 16
I'm just asking, do you feel better telling me that you don't understand signage or you don't understand the concept of sales or quadrants. I'm just curious if you don't like Miro.
Do you feel better?
Speaker 17 No, not really.
Speaker 19 I like Camden Yards, dude. I like Chamerica.
Speaker 19 I like other ballparks.
Speaker 25 I don't like this one.
Speaker 10 Did you see, David, where it was ranked? That's what we're talking about. There was a ranking of the MLB.
Speaker 10 63 of 90.
Speaker 4 Greg Cody had an opinion here, though, that he wasn't allowed to express.
Speaker 18 I mean,
Speaker 18 I think it's a great little ballpark.
Speaker 9 I think the size condescending.
Speaker 18 No, I think the capacity is just the the right size for this franchise right now. I think the retractable roof was necessary and smart.
Speaker 18 I think the look over the outfield wall to the downtown skyline is gorgeous.
Speaker 18 I think there's a lot good about it, and I'm not going to retrofit that because I object right now to the way the club is being run by the cheapest owner in all of sports, Bruce Sherman.
Speaker 18 I could go on and on about that, but I think the ballpark itself is perfectly fine. I like the location as well.
Speaker 19 Yeah, I love the location.
Speaker 5 Look, I think I've been to most of the MLB ballparks, and this one's just not for me.
Speaker 24 If you like it, I'm not going to hold it against you.
Speaker 25 I just fancy, you know, 20 other ballparks more than this one.
Speaker 26 And I guess I'm more of a traditionalist when it comes to ballparks.
Speaker 19 I've never had a good time in that place.
Speaker 16
David. Well, that's not true.
That's not true at all.
Speaker 16 You have had a good time because you've gone to a game with your daughter and and you said that you had a very good time and made a memory with her. Yeah, I liked it at three.
Speaker 19 We left after three endings.
Speaker 16 So you had a great hour.
Speaker 4 I was there with friends.
Speaker 1 Like, there's just nothing. I don't like the sweets.
Speaker 17 I don't like the lower level.
Speaker 21 I don't have good times there.
Speaker 9 I didn't even like
Speaker 9 it.
Speaker 4 I thought the food was good. I thought the food.
Speaker 9 Has it gone down in the last two and a half years?
Speaker 3 I've never liked the food.
Speaker 10 When it first opened, it had like the Cuban little corner out there. Like, that's gone.
Speaker 16 Taste of Miami. Yeah.
Speaker 9 16 years ago.
Speaker 17 This was not for me.
Speaker 16
I'm sorry. Okay, so it's not a new ballpark anymore.
Let me start with that. This is now entering season number 14.
Speaker 16 But what I also will say, Mike, about Comerica and about some of the traditional ballparks, when it was being negotiated with the city of Miami and the County of Miami-Dade, nobody wanted a traditional park because they felt that would not reflect Miami and the newness and the new money and the Latin aspect of Miami.
Speaker 16
No one wanted a Camden Yards. It actually was part of the deal that the project would not be an old-style retrofitted ballpark.
So it was never even a possibility.
Speaker 23 I get that.
Speaker 19 It does also age buildings prematurely when you go for a more contemporary look and 20 years go by and then all of a sudden you wonder what someone was thinking there.
Speaker 16
But for Vegas, Mike, they're building the same looking thing. They're building the Sydney Opera House again in Vegas.
And
Speaker 16 it's closer to Marlins Park than it is to Comerica.
Speaker 20 This is not that complicated of a disagreement.
Speaker 1 I understand why you like it and I understand why
Speaker 27 this coming from
Speaker 9 Lone Depot Park.
Speaker 9 Oh, yeah.
Speaker 9 I called it a hole. Yeah, I called it a hole.
Speaker 2 Yeah, I don't like it.
Speaker 28 It's bad.
Speaker 17 It's bad. Not good.
Speaker 4 Let's get into what Greg Cody was saying here before we get into the topics of the day.
Speaker 4 Greg was saying that Bruce Sherman is the cheapest owner in all of sports. Does he have that right?
Speaker 16 Oh, I think that that's an argument that people in Pittsburgh would say that Bob Nutting is. I think that people in Chicago would say that Jerry Reinsdorf is.
Speaker 16 And I think I could probably keep going and go city by city. You have total location bias in that.
Speaker 16 And the fact of the matter is the Marlins at the payrolls they've had, they should have been able to win because there's teams in the playoffs every year.
Speaker 16 Even the Marlins themselves were in the playoffs only a few years ago.
Speaker 16 And so far be it from me to defend Bruce Sherman, except to tell you that I think it's the results that you're playing, not the payroll.
Speaker 18 Well,
Speaker 18
it's the lack of a plan. They're building toward a future that never gets here.
They're fielding a minor league lineup this season.
Speaker 18 A month from now, they probably will trade their only star, Sandy Alcantar, once he proves he's healthy with four or five starts. And their minor league system, I saw the pipeline ranking.
Speaker 18
They're only mid-pack right now. It's not as if they have a top three minor league system where the immediate future is guaranteed.
He is spending egregiously low.
Speaker 18 They lose 100 games last year and the payroll falls by 36 million dollars. If I were MLB or the Players Association, I wouldn't stand for the inexcusably low spending that Bruce.
Speaker 4
But they have a floor, don't they? Like when all of this is bargained, right, David? Like what he's saying there, you wouldn't stand for it. They do stand for it.
It was negotiated.
Speaker 16 Well, there's no actual salary floor. I think what you're referring to, Dan, is that the union has an opportunity to file a grievance.
Speaker 16 And there was a grievance filed against us and many other teams over the years when the union thinks the payroll is too low.
Speaker 16
It should be very telling to you if no grievance is filed against the Marlins this year. It means that the union looked at the books, which they do every year.
They get our financial statements.
Speaker 16 And they see exactly the revenue and they see the losses. And therefore, they see that there is no grievance to be won.
Speaker 16 Sometimes they just file it for PR, but other years they know there's nothing they can do. The Marlins are putting out a payroll that is really related to the revenue that they have, which is bleak.
Speaker 4 Do you take some sort of weird, devilish satisfaction being in the middle of the idea that you helped ruin the business down here because they can't afford anything because they spent too much buying the team from you?
Speaker 16 No, I take pleasure in knowing that that is the laziest take of all time from someone of your stature, that you would say that an ownership group, because they paid too much, it's like saying you bought a house for too much, so therefore you don't mow the lawn.
Speaker 16
It's completely ridiculous. Or you let the pool turn into moss because you paid too much for the house.
Did they overpay for the Marlins? You bet you're sweet Bippy they did, but that is nothing.
Speaker 9 By how much?
Speaker 9 By how much?
Speaker 4 By $300 million? By $400 million? How much did they overpay? By something that would make for a nice payroll if they were spending it there?
Speaker 16 They overpaid by probably $400 to $600 million, given where the other bids were.
Speaker 17 David's right, though, but they bought it.
Speaker 16
So it's yours. It's not my problem.
Do something. I don't take satisfaction.
Speaker 16 It's if you overpay for a house or a car or a piece of memorabilia or you overpay in whatever it is you're doing that means you can't allocate toward other things, that really has nothing to do with the seller at all.
Speaker 20 Famously, Dan, you went at Major League Baseball for not doing their due diligence and making sure that this was not something that the ownership group overextended itself.
Speaker 20 And part of the business plan was that they were going going to cut because they did overextend themselves i don't want to pick at old wounds anymore i want to talk to you as like a former team president though there was a i guess he's okay now so we can kind of laugh at it but tracy morgan vomited courtside at madison square garden which will probably be a meme forevermore as well as his photo of him recuper uh recuperating but how from a team ops perspective tracy morgan throwing up courtside is probably treated differently than
Speaker 5 a regular Joe Schmo
Speaker 20 such that they are sitting courtside would be treated.
Speaker 21 How do you think those conversations go?
Speaker 1 How would they have gone if something similar were to happen in your line of work?
Speaker 16 Oh, we actually rehearse that, Mike. We rehearse if something happens that interrupts the field of play.
Speaker 16 You rehearse it with your cleaning crew, with your security, what you would do if there has to be a stoppage, because normally it's going to be a spilling of beer or a throwing of popcorn or something that would get on the field.
Speaker 16
But of course, you plan for the occasional vomit. And the way you do it is you are sprung into action.
You've got people who are assigned the mop, people who are assigned the pail.
Speaker 16 You've got people who are assigned the spray.
Speaker 16 You've got people who understand what to do about giving free stuff to the people next to where the vomit happened or where the spill happened in order to make sure that your customers are happy.
Speaker 16 So you go right to page 68 of the playbook, and that is what the Knicks did, and you keep on going. So it doesn't matter whether it's Tracy Morgan or a person to be named later or nameless later.
Speaker 16 They very well knew what to do and it's gross, but it's the least gross thing.
Speaker 16 At the end of the games, I would get a report and it wasn't labeled this, but I would label it like the top 10 grossest things from the game. Like what happened in the bathroom at section 104.
Speaker 16 And you get a report of, hey, there was a stuffed toilet or there was a spill or there was people who were overserved and vomiting barely makes your top 10.
Speaker 9 Okay.
Speaker 29 I had a follow-up and now I have like 10 more follow-ups.
Speaker 29 I guess I first want to start with when you rehearsed it, did you have like an actor with fake vomit that would fake vomit everywhere and then you do like a whole cleanup thing?
Speaker 16
Yeah, but you don't do it with vomit. You do it with, you just spill stuff.
You spill a liquid. We didn't put chunks in it.
We didn't do anything like that to make it vomit.
Speaker 16 We would just do it with water. We wouldn't even do it with sticky stuff like beer, even though beer is the the most commonly thing, the most common thing that's spilled in your ballpark is beer.
Speaker 16 But no, you don't practice with actual beer.
Speaker 29 But then how is your staff ready? If it doesn't smell bad or if it's not like a biohazard, I feel like you're going to take different steps there to clean it up than if you would just have fake water.
Speaker 29 Like, I don't think you're doing your staff a service by having, you know, just water.
Speaker 12 You got to be ready.
Speaker 16 Yeah, but I don't start a fire every time I do a fire drill.
Speaker 29 Well, maybe if you did, you'd be better prepared for a fire.
Speaker 9 Well, okay.
Speaker 16
I don't even know how to respond to that. I do not believe that it is appropriate to start a fire in order to practice what to do.
Active shooter drills, we do all the time.
Speaker 16 We don't have an active shooter who is actually shooting at people, but we are prepared with what to do when that happens.
Speaker 4 That was unnecessary.
Speaker 4 Just unnecessary.
Speaker 22 It actually seems pretty necessary given the times.
Speaker 1 But I'm wondering if you've ever had a similar situation with a VIP.
Speaker 6 Doesn't necessarily have to be, you know, someone throwing up, but have you ever had an issue health-related or some other type of issue around a VIP that was in one of your ballparks?
Speaker 16 I don't recall anybody even being overserved.
Speaker 16 Obviously, we have a lot of celebrities who came to games over the years, and I don't recall ever having to kick anyone out or having a crossword with them.
Speaker 16 I certainly recall throwing people out. Every game, there's people who go to the medical center and you get a full report of everybody who goes for liability purposes.
Speaker 16 Most of the time, they're overserved or they've been hit by a foul ball and you got to keep track of that. But we would, I was never told over 18 years that, hey, there's a celebrity here.
Speaker 16 And if they're going to be overserved, it would be in the suite where I was. And so we would be in control of that.
Speaker 18 David, I have a specific question to ask you, but first I have to hark back to something you said and make a point of clarification.
Speaker 18 When you use the phrase bet your bippy, What is the etymology on that?
Speaker 16 It is just me trying to appeal to you and the demographic that you bring when you're on the show.
Speaker 16 And I believe the expression is bet your sweet bippy.
Speaker 10 Yes.
Speaker 4 You need to stop doing all of that.
Speaker 9 Why did you say yes? No, because he's right.
Speaker 4 Yeah, but sweet bippy.
Speaker 9 Okay, but
Speaker 18 it reminds me,
Speaker 18 it's from laugh-in.
Speaker 9 All right.
Speaker 9 All right, let's.
Speaker 16
Dan, just give me 10 seconds. Just pretend you're not there and that Greg is running the show.
Greg, I have been saying bet your bippy on nothing personal.
Speaker 16
And I had someone reach out to me at davidsampsonpodcast.com who was in college, who loved laughing and said, you're doing it wrong. It's bet your sweet bippy.
And I've never seen that.
Speaker 4 All right, laughing for laughing for the uninitiated is a 1960s comedy television show. 1970s, maybe?
Speaker 9
1970s. 1960s.
Groundbreaking.
Speaker 4
1970s. Please.
Groundbreaking. Please stop doing that.
Speaker 17 Rowan and Martin.
Speaker 16 You ever talk about Seinfeld? Please.
Speaker 4 Cheers. Tony.
Speaker 19 Those are just as foolish.
Speaker 4 Okay, educate yourselves. No, no, no.
Speaker 4 Yes. No, laugh-in is 20 years,
Speaker 4 20 years earlier than those. Laugh-in is like one of the original television comedies.
Speaker 12 Yeah, Ruth Buzzing.
Speaker 16 As you get further away from when their start date was, you start to conflate it.
Speaker 16 And if I told you right now to guess what year the Civil War started, I would hope that you'd say, hey, sounds like 1865. But if you said 1845, I'd say, all right, wrong, but close.
Speaker 4
All right, it started in 1968. I'm asking asking you to eradicate it from your lexicon or update your lexicon.
Let's do top five, Chris Cody. Get the fanfare ready.
Speaker 4 Top five grossest things David Sampson has gotten in one of those endgame
Speaker 4 reports. Number five, David.
Speaker 16 Number five is a adult who had an accident outside of the bathroom.
Speaker 4 It's a nightmare. Number four.
Speaker 16 Number four is someone who thought it would be wise to take their beer cup and fill it with ice cream and then drop it on somebody in a fight.
Speaker 4 A good move.
Speaker 16 It's a terrible move. It's disgusting and it caused us to actually have to
Speaker 16 know.
Speaker 16 Number three, the number three grossest thing that ever came to my desk after a game was when the Bat Boys with an opposing team, and I don't want to make up the team because I can't remember, they had a tobacco combination that I hadn't seen before that they couldn't get off the dugout floor.
Speaker 16
And it cost extra time, which was extra money to get the dugout ready. If you've never seen a dugout after a game, you don't know what I'm talking about, but it is heinous.
It's sticky.
Speaker 4 Sticky, brown, disgusting.
Speaker 16
Sticky, brown, and disgusting, which could describe my number two. Number two, and this is just me with children.
I did not want to put any children's bathrooms or changing areas.
Speaker 16 And the second grossest thing, which to me is very patently offensive, is when somebody, and it's happened more than once, left dirty diapers not in a refuse place. They left it out in the open.
Speaker 16 That is unacceptable.
Speaker 4
Period. All right.
So sticky brown. And when you said number two there, were you saying you're number two or were you saying you're number two in the rankings? When
Speaker 16 you that was my number two in the rankings?
Speaker 4 Okay, number one
Speaker 16 The grossest thing that ever happened to me uh is when someone got hit with a foul ball and it opened a gash in their head and it was their fault because they were on their phone and it was a quick settlement.
Speaker 16 But when you go visit them and they're going into the ambulance, it is really gross because the head really does bleed tremendously and a ball, foul ball can really open up the noggin.
Speaker 16 And I found that to be gross. gross, even though I'm a fan of medical shows like Ray's Anatomy, that did not make me happy.
Speaker 10 I feel like throw-ups worse than a lot of people.
Speaker 28 Yeah, Barf is worse than that, yeah.
Speaker 4 It was their fault was unnecessary.
Speaker 9 Foul ball.
Speaker 4 And a quick settlement, what? Did you just walk up and write a check for four grand and be like, sorry? And then that person left with blood all over the check.
Speaker 16
It's funny. You don't start with four grand.
You start with a signed ball and a jersey. And you work your way up if you absolutely have to.
Speaker 4 Well, what was the settlement? I need to hear more. Like, why did you offer up? It was their fault they were in the phone.
Speaker 16
Oh, because that's the first thing we do. We go to the videotape and we see whether or not someone who gets hit in the noggin was on their phone.
Because if not, then we settle for more.
Speaker 16 If they're on their phone, we settle for less. If we see that someone's paying attention to the game and they get hit in the head, we're going in, forget the ball.
Speaker 16
We're going to start with a meet and greet. We may even start with the first pitch.
Now, wait a minute.
Speaker 18 Isn't there a disclaimer
Speaker 18 in fine print on the back of a ticket that says, essentially, that says, if you get hit by a foul ball it ain't our fault
Speaker 16 yeah and and and that is the truth that's the legal truth
Speaker 16 but they they people file lawsuits because you get 1-800 lawyers who are willing to do it on commission uh 33 and so they will just waste our time and our money so we we call it a nuisance payment okay so you have never you never contested one of that such claim
Speaker 16 We went pretty far with several of them because they were being so unreasonable, but we never actually went to trial.
Speaker 16 So every one of them ends up as a settlement, but it's just a matter of when you settle.
Speaker 18 And what's a typical settlement? 5K, less than that?
Speaker 16
It depends. 5K is a good number.
If you get yourself 5K from a little knock, we didn't really like paying people who said, oh, my back hurts, my shoulder hurts. I want to see blood for 5K.
Speaker 16 I want to see bruising.
Speaker 16 I want to see seams in your arm
Speaker 16 for 5K.
Speaker 16 Like, don't tell me you have a headache. I'm not interested in that.
Speaker 10 But I'm just like, so like a screaming line drive foul ball, if you go back and look and they're on their phone, that like you're like, oh, we're clear.
Speaker 10 Like that, well, like some foul balls are like, I get you on like the lofty foul ball, but like a screamer down the baseline, you're like, oh, they're on their phone. We're good.
Speaker 16 That's a utility infielder sign jersey.
Speaker 4
Okay, I want to play this game. Let's play this game.
Come up. I want you guys to give me some scenarios here and then just have him say, here's a Mike Lowell bobblehead.
That's what you get.
Speaker 4 You know, open the bidding because what's happening here is so wrong. Like he's saying somebody did something and made a negotiation point that was unreasonable.
Speaker 4 My thinking is that person is probably more reasonable than David getting there trying to immediately negotiate with a bobblehead while that person hemorrhages from the head hit with a screaming line drive and wasn't prepared for a negotiation that arrived with settlement online.
Speaker 4 A person who is to be taken advantage of, bleeding from the face, and David's there with $5,000. What are you saying is unreasonable in that circumstance?
Speaker 16
Listen, some people like a Mezega. I don't really understand your position here that you're saying that I'm being unreasonable.
Some people are more than happy to take away signed items from a game.
Speaker 27 What if before the nets went up, during your time at Pro Player, a bat went into the stands?
Speaker 1 Even if they're not on their phone, that's harder to get away from.
Speaker 20 How does that negotiation go?
Speaker 12 You get to keep it.
Speaker 16 I love where your head is because bats are a different story than balls. And the way you work with bats is you don't get to keep the bat that hits you because often the player wants it back.
Speaker 16
So we promise the players that we will go for a trade. And that's a twofer.
You get two unused actual bats for every gamer that hits you when you're in the stands. So that's the general rule.
Speaker 16 Now, if the bat splinters and it's wedged in your arm, then you keep the broken bat because the player doesn't want it. On top of that, you're invited back
Speaker 16 and you may even get to meet the player depending on how wedged in the wood is.
Speaker 10 I'm picturing the bat like through someone's arm.
Speaker 9 That's a good deal for an impaling.
Speaker 16 That's the rate of impalement.
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Speaker 12 Don Lebatard.
Speaker 4 You don't remember the idea?
Speaker 9 I was probably like, that kind of thing. Something.
Speaker 18 Okay, no.
Speaker 15 The home run call was that kind of swing, that kind of thing.
Speaker 12 Stugats.
Speaker 16 Oh, it's a good call. Thank you.
Speaker 18 And plus, it doesn't matter who's hitting it. Like, you're not tailoring it to a particular name.
Speaker 18 You know, all that jazz. You know, you don't got to do that.
Speaker 9
You just got to get it. Oh, that would be a great call.
Oh, that would be a good call. That kind of swing, that kind of thing.
Speaker 4 This is the Don Lebatar Show with the Stugats.
Speaker 4 I can't help, okay,
Speaker 4 but betray one of our colleagues here.
Speaker 4 And I regret that I'm doing this, but I can't unsee it right now because Tony's been shaking his head the entirety of this segment, like genuinely, seemingly appalled at how clinically cutthroat you are about not being human.
Speaker 4 But I read his lips a second ago, and I don't know who he's talking to, but he said, I saw it: it, evil.
Speaker 9 The word evil.
Speaker 4 Like, who were you talking to back there, Tony? Because the entire time, that would have been good on air, but I saw it off air.
Speaker 28 It was said into my microphone to somebody who works in the back room, who's Lewis. And he was talking about how, wow, I can't believe it all this time that we were going to these games.
Speaker 28 High above the press box, David Sampson looking down at somebody getting hit in the face of the ball and being like, man.
Speaker 4 I want you to imagine 9,000 fans are are there and somebody comes out with a piece of bat in their arm, impaled, bleeding, scared.
Speaker 28 I'll give you two other bats.
Speaker 4 How about that? 14-year-old kid, and he's like, hey, you want a Miguel Rojas ball kid?
Speaker 18 Yes, a John Birdie autograph.
Speaker 18 David.
Speaker 16 Laugh as you want, but kids actually get premiums.
Speaker 16 That is where
Speaker 9 he does have a heart, man.
Speaker 16 Listen, I'm not heartless at all. If you're an impaled kid, that is worth more than an impaled adult.
Speaker 10 David, what if my mom slips in the bathroom and really like hurts her back?
Speaker 16 What kind of shoes is she wearing? Heels to a game?
Speaker 18 Yeah, high heels. Yeah.
Speaker 9 Just normal shoes. Normal shoes.
Speaker 16
Sneakers. Normal shoes is worth something.
If you're wearing rubber sole shoes and you trip because we have a wet spot, so that's something the cleaning crew knows.
Speaker 10 There's no sign. No sign up that says wet floor.
Speaker 16 So we've got these yellow V-shaped things that you put in the bathroom when there's the wet spot, and that absolves you. That's how you get to the utility.
Speaker 16 If we don't get to, you could be looking at a low ball for that. If you slip and fall in a wet bathroom or
Speaker 16 a concourse where there's been something that spilled, you're getting starting nine. Wow.
Speaker 18 So if I slip and fall on a soiled diaper that hasn't been picked up, I get to bat fourth in the next game. There we go.
Speaker 16 It's about the worst case scenario for me as someone who would trip on that sort of item.
Speaker 16 I never had that happen, so I never had to make that negotiation.
Speaker 1 So I don't know where it would end, but you would clearly have the upper hand were you to take advantage hypothetical for you there's a fight in the fish tank oh what in the outfield at pro player stadium um your security is late to get there there's pushing and shoving one of the people involved in the fight gets shoved onto a patron that is sitting behind them not involved at all in the fight they get hurt in it what is your liability there and ensuing settlement Well, you said pro player, so I'm in the clear because
Speaker 16 I'm a tenant of pro player. I didn't control the security of pro player.
Speaker 16 And And so while it would make me angry that security would be late to a fight like that, that would be a Dolphins Wayne Heisinga slash Steven Ross issue at Lone Depot.
Speaker 16 If that would happen,
Speaker 16 we would have a problem because it is not the expectation that there would be a third party who would get hurt in a fight. So that person would have two causes of action.
Speaker 16 One against the people who were fighting.
Speaker 16 And the odds are, depending on where the seat location is, and I'm being general, but it generally works, is that you're not going to get much blood from a stone in that regard, which is how the team then ends up getting sued.
Speaker 16 We would then counter sue the two people fighting, and we would figure out how to get the insurance companies to settle if that third party actually did get hurt.
Speaker 29 So you think Bob Nutting is cheaper than this?
Speaker 16 Wait, I'm sorry. You're calling me cheap because of payroll or because of how items are settled in a legal situation?
Speaker 29 Just general unwillingness to give things away.
Speaker 16 Oh, I I think that the people who work for me and the fans in general would say that that is not my reputation at all, actually. My reputation is that when people are deserving, they get paid.
Speaker 16 And when people are deserving, they get items. When there is something that I made a mistake on or my staff did who reports to me,
Speaker 16 of course, I'm responsible for that. And I would never shy away from responsibilities.
Speaker 16 What I will not handle or stand or pay for is people trying to get one over on me, trying to get something for something they don't deserve.
Speaker 28 Dave, what if I'm in the outfield, home runs coming my way, I'm tracking it, right? I'm tracking in the bleachers.
Speaker 28 All of a sudden, I lean over the side and then I fall and I tumble into like the Clevelander all of a sudden, right?
Speaker 17 Or onto the field.
Speaker 28
Or onto the field or something. I fall 10 feet, 20 feet.
What happens?
Speaker 16
Ejected. Immediate ejecting.
If you're hurt, we'll take you to the ambulance, to the hospital.
Speaker 16 But if you, in any way, get onto the field of play, going for a foul ball or not, you are immediately ejected.
Speaker 16 There are signs up that is very clear on your ticket and signs in the ballpark that you may not interrupt or go onto the field to play.
Speaker 28 What if I'm in the Clevelander?
Speaker 9 Like I fall in, but I fall into that little back area.
Speaker 1 Lucky me.
Speaker 16
I would say that anyone who by mistake gets into the Cleveland. Architecturally, that is impossible.
The only people who could get into the Clevelander would be your left fielder.
Speaker 16 In that manner, it would be very difficult the way the ballpark is built to fall into the Clevelander. I've never seen that, and I don't believe it's physically even possible.
Speaker 10 You can prove how little Tony's been to that ballpark. So 25K.
Speaker 4 Baseball began yesterday.
Speaker 4
Billy Gill complains and says it's fake baseball. We have not talked about that at all.
Is there anything worth talking about? The Dodgers win both games. The Dodgers unlikely to lose all season.
Speaker 16 Well, I would say that if you have an over-under from DraftKings or anywhere where the win total is 162, I would encourage you to put all of your hard-earned money on the under.
Speaker 16 The Dodgers will lose a game. Their over-under, I believe, is around 104.5, which is one of the top over-unders you'll see.
Speaker 16 And what you saw in these two games is that even without Freddie Freeman and Mookie Betts, they have the ability to score runs.
Speaker 16 Their starting rotation is deep when healthy, and their bullpen is deep, especially with new Marlon, old Marlon Tanner Scott, who they didn't even use for the save this morning.
Speaker 16 They went with Alex Vesia, and they've just got options upon options. If they're healthy, they're going to win 110 games, and they've got a chance to go for the Mariners' record of 116.
Speaker 16
The Cubs are despondent. They flew all the way to Tokyo.
No Freeman, no bets, and they still could not go away with a split. That's a crappy flight home today.
Speaker 4 David, just before we get to your review from the week, I feel like I can say this without being prisoner of the moment and even understanding Mookie Betts and Freeman might get hurt.
Speaker 4 You never know who's going to get injured. This is the best roster ever assembled, correct? This is the best team.
Speaker 4 When you put an over-under at 104 and a half, that people are going to just assume you're going to win 100 games. There's never been anything like this, correct?
Speaker 16 I think there have been, Dan. I mean, that Mariners team, I think, was assembled and was potentially a better team than what these Dodgers are.
Speaker 16 We saw what the Dodgers did last year when their rotation was completely injured. They still were able to beat the battle.
Speaker 4 But I'm not talking about injury. I'm talking about when you can go through 10 pitchers like that,
Speaker 4 when your bullpen arms are going to get you from five through nine because you're stronger there than everyone too.
Speaker 16
It's deep. There's no question.
And of course, I'm jealous of it.
Speaker 16 You know, thinking back to trying to compete against that, you're saying to me is that the best roster ever assembled, I'd have to, I'm not willing to make the argument.
Speaker 4 You can make the argument is my point.
Speaker 16 Yes, you can definitely make the argument. I mean, and you ought to make the argument when your payroll is almost $400 million
Speaker 16 and you've got Otani in at 46, which is where Otani is slated in that payroll because of how the math is done. You've got to be able to win games.
Speaker 16 It really makes Mets fans despondent when they think about the amount of money the Mets spend on players and they don't get the results the Dodgers are getting.
Speaker 16 You have to expect the winning that the Dodgers are doing.
Speaker 25 David, I want to ask you about monologues on the big screen and on the small screen as well, because I was watching White Lotus and there was a great monologue.
Speaker 26 Even though Goggins got in a couple of times, this was a monologue.
Speaker 1 And I'm curious, what are some of your favorite monologues you've ever seen on television or in movies?
Speaker 20 Jaws had a great one.
Speaker 24 A few good men had a great one.
Speaker 1 I'm curious, your thoughts.
Speaker 16 Dallas had a great one.
Speaker 1 Yeah, I am. God, I guess.
Speaker 9 That's one of my favorites.
Speaker 23 It's probably not even the best Alec Baldwin monologue, though.
Speaker 4 He's got two.
Speaker 16 So it's interesting. You're talking about the White Lotus, and you're talking about Sam Rockwell, who his real life partner.
Speaker 9 Spoiler alert.
Speaker 16 Why is that a spoiler alert?
Speaker 9 I actually don't think this is a bad spoiler, and I'll tell you why.
Speaker 19 I was checked out on White Lotus.
Speaker 1 I had no interest in it.
Speaker 25 Everyone said that it wasn't off to the greatest start.
Speaker 27 And then I saw a still on social media of Sam Rockwell in this scene with Walton Goggins.
Speaker 25 I'm like, I'm in. And I hopped on that moving train.
Speaker 1 So I think in this instance, a couple days removed, mentioning that Sam Rockwell has joined the cast of White Lotus is a good thing.
Speaker 10 It's a reveal, David, though. Like that's that they, it wasn't announced before the show.
Speaker 8 It's not like it's Brad Pitt.
Speaker 26 I know he's won an Academy Award, but I think Sam Rockwell can occasionally go to the grocery store and not get bothered.
Speaker 17 is what I'm saying.
Speaker 16
I think that you may see Tracy Letts at some point. When you ask people to go to Thailand for seven months, they're going to say, hi, I'm Leslie Bibb.
I'll say yes, but I'd like to bring my partner.
Speaker 16
And Mike White says, your partner's Sam Rockwell, bring them. We'll use them.
And then Sam Rockwell appears.
Speaker 16
I don't think anyone who's paying attention was surprised to see Sam Rockwell on the screen. I think he said, oh, that makes total sense.
Why sit in his room all day while his partner is filming?
Speaker 16 And he ends up getting such a great start to that.
Speaker 4 That scene was just written for him, though, meant to be more and more absurd.
Speaker 4 Like they coaxed coaxed him into doing that based on just writing what Mike is describing as Mike just compared that monologue, ridiculous, to the greats of all time in the history of cinema.
Speaker 4 It's pitch perfect.
Speaker 23 It's fantastic. I did love the movie.
Speaker 20 It's one of the greatest, not pitch perfect, the movie.
Speaker 1 It's delivered by one of the better actors.
Speaker 5 I think, generationally speaking, Sam Rockwell is one of the more talented actors of his time, though.
Speaker 16 It reminds me of the Christopher Walken monologue in fiction in terms of subject matter.
Speaker 16 And now, maybe that is considered spoiling, but the reason why it's getting so much attention is that A, it's Sam Rockwell, one of the best actors alive.
Speaker 16 And B, it's done in a way that every time the scene continues and it almost looks like one take, you're looking and saying, there's no way he's going to, oh my God, he just went there.
Speaker 16
Well, that's it. He won't go further.
And then it's further and further.
Speaker 16
And then when you're done with the scene, you're saying to yourself, this is brilliant because you you don't even know what it has to do with the show. Nothing.
They have just
Speaker 9 nothing, nothing.
Speaker 23 Well, no, no, they established he's got a role play.
Speaker 23 And we now know that he's pretty good at it.
Speaker 4 Regardless, I'm going to let you go now, David, because you wanted some time on your review, and we do not have that time. So I want to make sure that we get that time next time.
Speaker 4
So just save that review. I want to make fun of Greg Cody for a couple of minutes.
Thank you for being on with us. We appreciate it.
Take care.
Speaker 22 I'm sorry about my opinions on Lone Depot. For what it's worth, I also don't like Kaseya.
Speaker 16 I don't feel better.
Speaker 4 Nothing personal is the name of the podcast.
Speaker 4 And I just want to address something here that happened during that segment where I had a private conversation with Chris Cody as everything was happening because I'm just fascinated still after all these years by his father.
Speaker 4 Greg knows it's not funny. Like he knows before he says that it's not funny to say, and what would this penalty be? Would I get to bat cleanup during a game?
Speaker 4 Like he knows aggressively that that's not funny. His comedic judgment my entire lifetime has been better than that, but he cannot help himself.
Speaker 4 And so he has to get out there with what he knows to be a sh just a shitty joke that we're all gonna we're all just gonna stare at him and be like, all right, Greg, like, you know better than that.
Speaker 4 You know that joke's not any good.
Speaker 28 It's visual humor.
Speaker 18 When I say that, you have to picture me at my age in a ridiculous batting helmet, baseball uniform, dressed like this.
Speaker 23 Oh, I have full baseball uniform.
Speaker 9 Yeah, full uniform, yeah.
Speaker 18 I won number nine, which was my first number in Little League because it was my mother's favorite number.
Speaker 16 Fun fact.
Speaker 12 But it's the visual.
Speaker 18 It's the visual. Me batting against a 98-mile-an-hour fast battle is fun fact.
Speaker 4 Look, but here, look, Chris, this is the reason that I bring it up with you, okay?
Speaker 4
I believe it is totally 100% fair criticism from our audience that both you and I are too hard on your father. It's absolutely fair.
But he knew before he said it that joke was shit.
Speaker 10 I don't want to leave you alone on this, Dan, but I'm kind of with my dad on this one.
Speaker 17 That is funny.
Speaker 13 Him in a uniform and a helmet.
Speaker 10 Like when you do the swing, you do the sound, too.
Speaker 10 What would your swing sound like?
Speaker 9 Yeah.
Speaker 18 I got bat speed.
Speaker 18 I tell you that. I may not make contact, but I got bat speed.
Speaker 4 There's just no way.
Speaker 17 Let's see.
Speaker 4 Let's get a bat.
Speaker 4 I want to see. We have a bat here, actually.
Speaker 9 I want to see.
Speaker 17 See in the cage.
Speaker 4
Here, we've got a bat. Here, you close this segment.
You get in a stance. Camera people, get ready.
Here we go. All visual.
This is all going to be visual.
Speaker 4 I don't feel safe in here.
Speaker 4 I'm going to leave.
Speaker 17 I'm going to.
Speaker 10 It's a normal-sized bat.
Speaker 9 MLB bat there.
Speaker 4 He's alleging that he has bat speed. We're going to get you near a microphone.
Speaker 1 Not next to the screen, though.
Speaker 9 Please, not next to the giant screen. Yeah, let's not do this.
Speaker 10 He can't hear me, Dan. Tell him to stop.
Speaker 4 I don't feel safe with any of this. I don't feel safe.
Speaker 1 Dad, watch with the backswing group.
Speaker 9 Please, watch the camera.
Speaker 18 The camera behind you.
Speaker 9 The camera behind you.
Speaker 19 I don't even have the space for this.
Speaker 9 Whoa.
Speaker 4 I don't think he has bat speed.
Speaker 4 I don't think so.
Speaker 3 This is my bat speed, but slow.
Speaker 10 Please don't hit the camera. Please don't hit the screen.
Speaker 4 Please be careful.
Speaker 17 It's not a terrible swing.
Speaker 20 This is not good.
Speaker 21 Track it, Tony.
Speaker 9 I'm going out of Cleveland.
Speaker 10 Watch the hand gesture.
Speaker 9 Ah, bun.
Speaker 25 You're going to hurt your finger that way, though.
Speaker 1 You're going to hurt your fingers.
Speaker 9 Pull it up a little bit too, a little low.
Speaker 4 I regret everything I did here.
Speaker 9 He does warm up his bat like a 1920s baseball player.
Speaker 9 Also, a switch.
Speaker 2
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Cuervo.
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Speaker 3
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Speaker 7 Folks, the leaves are turning.
Speaker 1 The weather's getting a little chillier. That means the football games are more important.
Speaker 17 That means football time should be Miller time.
Speaker 31 Game day hits different with a Miller light in your hand.
Speaker 1 From jaw-dropping touchdowns to fantasy heartbreaks, my fantasy season's over already, but you know what makes that better?
Speaker 3 Miller time!
Speaker 3
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And here's the kicker.
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Speaker 3 So whatever your game day looks like, remember Miller time is always a good time. Miller Light Grape Taste, 96 calories.
Speaker 1 Go to MillerLight.com/slash stan to find delivery options near you.
Speaker 3 Or you can pick up Miller Light pretty much anywhere they sell beer. It's Miller time.
Speaker 3 Celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin, 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.