Hour 2: I Happen to Have Heard (feat. Jessica Smetana)

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Speaker 11 This is the Dan Levatar Show with the Stu Gats Podcast.

Speaker 12 Jessica thinks Zaz is a liar. Zaz thinks LeBron is a liar.
We'll get to the lies in a second. But I just want to tell you guys a quick story I heard Sean Penn tell the other day, a funny story.

Speaker 12 As he was training for the movie Cops, Sean Penn was going out on, you know, he was going out on drives with officers. He was training.

Speaker 12 He actually ends up in a drug bus where he's doing some of his things that he's learned, where he's got a gun out.

Speaker 10 He's got it on his what is that what is that that you're doing he's i think it's like this not you know you're talking about having the flashlight and the gun so like people can see yes

Speaker 12 yes that's what i'm doing i'm doing the flashlight and the gun and he's been trained to also do the quick peek around the corner and it's a quick peek and if you see a gun you shout gun but the way that you can do the quick peek nobody's reflexes are fast enough to shoot somebody who's doing a quick peek so

Speaker 12 we're talking about childhood friend of charlie sheen sean penny yeah uh sean penn Penn, yes. Okay, got it.

Speaker 12 Sean Penn is training for the movie Cops, and they've got five drug dealers who are on the sidewalk on their knees, and the other cop hears Sean Penn shout gun after the quick peek.

Speaker 12 And so they bring in reinforcement. There's a helicopter, everything else.

Speaker 7 And Sean Penn is terrified.

Speaker 12 And then he realizes on his second quick peek, it was his reflection.

Speaker 12 He was seeing his own gun in the reflection, and all of the other cops were making fun of him because they were brought in by helicopter and everything else just because he shouted gun at his own gun.

Speaker 15 Amateur.

Speaker 12 We all would have done much better in that spot, I'm sure.

Speaker 12 Jess, thank you for joining us. Why is Zaslow a liar? What are the specifics of his story that do not ring true? That he had a two-stop flight or a one-stop flight.

Speaker 10 Oh, it was one-stop.

Speaker 12 A first-class flight to South Bend that stopped in Chicago that he thought was a plane on the second leg and was a bus on the second leg.

Speaker 16 I listened to this story yesterday and I was like, There's just no way. I have never heard of this happening.
I have never heard of this in my life. There is no way that he did this.

Speaker 16 I just don't believe it. And I was about to text him and tell him what a liar he was.
And then I decided, you know what? Let me just Google this first.

Speaker 16 Sure enough, American Airlines started this service three weeks ago. You're one of the first ever customers.
Congratulations to this motor coach from but

Speaker 4 mean, I was listening to this.

Speaker 18 Wow.

Speaker 16 And my first thought was: there's no way he left from an actual gate at O'Hare. There's no way he left from inside the terminal.

Speaker 10 Yes, and pulled up to a terminal in South Bend.

Speaker 16 It's unbelievable that this happened.

Speaker 19 I don't believe that.

Speaker 4 That's a hilarious detail.

Speaker 2 Vindicated.

Speaker 21 They dropped you off at the South Bend airport.

Speaker 17 Yes, at the terminal.

Speaker 10 I arrived at the gate in South Bend.

Speaker 16 Dazz, I asked so many people who go to Notre Dame games for work on a regular basis, former students. I said, have you ever heard of this before? They all said, no.
There is just no way.

Speaker 16 And I said, how did he book this without knowing that it was a bus on the second leg? And they said, well, to be honest, that part is believable from everything you've said about this guy.

Speaker 20 So credit to you, Daz. Whoa, okay.

Speaker 10 He's making the story more believable.

Speaker 16 First of all, I said he's like a Miami sports radio guy. They're like, oh, I guess, yeah, makes sense.

Speaker 22 First of all, whoa.

Speaker 10 Second of all, if you pull, I pull up, I could actually do it.

Speaker 9 I still have the boarding pass, and on the boarding pass, yep, that was exactly the bus.

Speaker 10 And on the boarding pass, there is a symbol of a plane, not of a bus, of an airplane.

Speaker 4 It's, it's like, it's, isn't that false advertising, damn?

Speaker 12 Did you see what it was written on the door? Landline. Yeah, it literally says operated by landline.

Speaker 10 I know, I know, I know. That's the new like service.
It's called, and it says American Airlines. Jess, here's the thing.

Speaker 16 Why was I i seemingly the only one confused when i was walking onto the shuttle bus everyone is going to their assigned seats and i'm literally saying who the hell cares about an assigned seat we're taking a shuttle it's gonna be 30 seconds to our plane i was the only one who apparently had no idea i'm sorry this is genuinely one of the funniest travel stories that i've ever heard i i kept waiting for it to be like oh and then we went to the plane and it was a small plane oh but no like you went all the way to south bend airport i think it's so so so funny it's probably one of the least efficient ways to get to south bend well it's it's but it certainly is if they don't take you to a bus station and for some reason they then take you again to another airline gate in the bus i mean i guess so you can like rent a car so i i read about this and there's they're doing this at a few smaller regional airports now including there's like an o'her connection that goes from o'er to rockford which is like a really big uh city outside of chicago and illinois um There are a few, if you've flying to Philadelphia, they'll take you to smaller cities inside Pennsylvania.

Speaker 16 So I understand like the gist of it. It makes sense.

Speaker 16 If you don't want to rent your own car at O'Hare and drive yourself there, or if you don't want to, I guess, just get on another plane because the flight from O'Hare to South Bend.

Speaker 10 No, I do.

Speaker 9 I want to get on another plane.

Speaker 17 I really do.

Speaker 5 It's surprising, folks.

Speaker 16 It's amazing. It's amazing to me.

Speaker 10 Dan, here is my boarding pass.

Speaker 7 I still have it. Chicago, South Bend.

Speaker 10 Is that a symbol of an airplane or a button?

Speaker 4 It's on the bus. I'm a band.

Speaker 12 At Levittard Show, because I don't know the difference between an airplane and a bus. At Levittard Show, put it on the poll.
Have you ever bought a flight and ended up on a bus?

Speaker 16 Dan's like, this is not a first-class ticket. I cannot read this.

Speaker 4 I got where you were going, Chris.

Speaker 12 The only way your story could have been funnier is if the guy next to you is selling shower curtain rings. The problem, or one of the problems, with Zaszlo's story is that is a first-class flight.

Speaker 12 He is

Speaker 12 that is, you just can't end up on a bus when you've got a first-class flight. That doesn't make any sense.

Speaker 10 There was no in-flight service either.

Speaker 10 There was no like what they

Speaker 10 used to call them stewardess. What is it now?

Speaker 12 Attendant.

Speaker 5 Flight attendant.

Speaker 10 Yeah, flight attendant. Did your tray have to be in the middle?

Speaker 23 Was Ralph Cramden driving the bus?

Speaker 12 Reference. I got it.

Speaker 10 I mean, that bus driver.

Speaker 9 It's not online, though.

Speaker 4 That's a honeymooner's reference.

Speaker 7 That bus driver.

Speaker 14 No, that's not a.

Speaker 5 No.

Speaker 12 Just because you don't get the reference doesn't mean it's a bad. I got it.
But it's a 1950s bus driver on television, Jackie Gleason joke. And it was rebooted with Cedric the Entertainer in 2005.

Speaker 15 Ralph Cramden, not Jackie Gleason.

Speaker 12 He's right.

Speaker 14 He's not right.

Speaker 5 Yeah, Jackie Gleason.

Speaker 4 Cramden was the bus driver.

Speaker 12 Played Ralph Cramden in the Honeymooners, a television show that ran from when to when, so that we can just have live back in my days with him talking about the origins of television.

Speaker 12 Dan, I'm not sure you're familiar with how acting works. See, the actor isn't actually a bus driver.
He's portraying a character who is the bus driver. So Ralph Cramden is the answer there.

Speaker 12 Jackie Gleason was just a guy who worked there.

Speaker 8 Originally aired from 55 to 56.

Speaker 15 Well, originally, but it went into the 60s.

Speaker 12 Syndication. Jessica, college football and all things college football are something that's an area of expertise for you.

Speaker 12 But I wanted to talk about what happened with Russell Wilson and Sean Payton before we get into the meat of the college football talk.

Speaker 12 It hasn't been often that Russell Wilson called someone classless in public. I think a lot of people sided with Russell Wilson on this one.
Rare win for Russell Wilson publicly.

Speaker 16 Oh, absolutely. Ever since that stupid Netflix movie with Kevin James as Sean Payton Dan, I've been like, how are we just brushing past this whole what? I mean, it was a ridiculous movie.

Speaker 5 Of course it was ridiculous. I said, what are we doing?

Speaker 16 Okay, I'm glad we're in agreement.

Speaker 16 I mean, it's just absurd for Sean Payton to take shots at Russell Wilson, who's like no one's favorite quarterback at this point, but absolutely justified in going after him on Twitter.

Speaker 16 And the let's ride at the end was a perfect comedic chef's kiss of a retort from Russ. So yeah, I'm team Russell Wilson.
That was just mean. Like, what's the point of that?

Speaker 27 I happened to have heard from a singular person and not verified with someone else that Russell Wilson bought a premium luxury box for that game, thinking that it was going to be his triumphant return to beat Sean Payton.

Speaker 27 And then he got benched and couldn't flip the luxury box.

Speaker 12 John Elway told you that?

Speaker 21 So, what is that?

Speaker 12 I happen to have heard is different from the source of the world.

Speaker 32 I happen to have heard a little piece of gossip that I wasn't able to verify

Speaker 26 with multiple sources from a singular person.

Speaker 33 But I do trust this source that told me Russell Wilson had an entire box and then, after being benched, tried to sell the box and found no takers.

Speaker 12 I don't trust this source.

Speaker 4 Wow.

Speaker 14 Wow.

Speaker 12 Happen to know is two sources. Happen to have heard from a single source is a less, it's a diluted form of reporting.

Speaker 30 That's why it doesn't have imaging.

Speaker 12 Untrustworthy source, I would say. The Notre Dame USC game that you were at, Jessica, you felt how you were not at it? Oh, I'm sorry.

Speaker 16 No, I was in New York watching it, just biting my nails the whole time. It was terrifying, but it was so fun.
Exhilarating, I would say.

Speaker 12 And your thoughts now on USC's, I'm sorry, Notre Dame's remaining schedule?

Speaker 16 I think that they're going to be favored by a lot of points in all the remaining games. And so if they lose a game, it would be a tremendous disappointment.

Speaker 16 And if they win out, they will probably be in the college football playoff.

Speaker 16 Even though Miami not holding up their end of the bargain last weekend, Dan.

Speaker 16 But we'll see. We'll see how Miami's end of their season shakes out, too, because they don't have that many more difficult games on their schedule either.

Speaker 24 Yeah, you can't take those for granted in today's college football era to say, well, they're going to be a big favorite for all of them.

Speaker 16 In fact, Marcus Freeman's lost plenty of big games as a big-time favorite, but that was the toughest he's lost more he's lost more of those games than he has like the ranked games i would say that's like but to be fair a couple of them

Speaker 16 the marshall game and the niu game were were both like season home openers early in the season this these teams under him have tended to get better throughout the year i think the only issue now is once you get into november now you have way more players getting hurt but that's across all of college football it doesn't matter though what miami does like yeah miami lost so maybe the win you know or the loss to miami doesn't mean as much for notre Notre Dame.

Speaker 10 But Notre Dame just wins the rest of their games, they're in. And if they lose a game, then they're out.
Like, it doesn't really matter.

Speaker 26 As just highlighted, they lost to NIU.

Speaker 30 So if Miami loses the rest of their games, it won't necessarily stack up to even that loss. And it didn't end up mattering because Notre Dame went all the way to the college football playoff final.

Speaker 18 Yeah.

Speaker 12 Where are you, Jessica, on Mike's contention that Notre Dame fans don't like hearing very much that the Notre Dame job might be a stepping stone job for Marcus Freeman?

Speaker 26 Well, that's how they're processing it.

Speaker 25 I'm not applying that.

Speaker 16 I don't think that's true.

Speaker 24 I'm not applying that, even though it happened with Brian Kelly, where he left them for an SEC.

Speaker 36 And I understand why fan bases get bothered, especially a program so tradition-rich, like Notre Dame and a team that literally just competed for a national title.

Speaker 36 I find it flattering that the NFL is interested in Marcus Freeman, that the 40 Gators and Penn State, two big programs. Our dream number one candidate is Marcus Freeman.

Speaker 24 What Diana said is right, by the way, when we had Diana earlier, Jess, and we asked her specifically about the Chicago Bears' interest, is Marcus Freeman's a bit different than all these other coaches that are a little dirtier when it comes to these things.

Speaker 13 He is about his team when he is with his team.

Speaker 22 If they are in it, and the problem last year with the Bears was Marcus Freeman kept winning in the college football playoff, and he was like, keep that away.

Speaker 34 It does, although it work in line with what I'm hearing, that if Notre Dame does lose another game this season, if that happens to happen, then it's kind of a green light for his agents to take some of these conversations a little bit more seriously.

Speaker 16 Yeah, I mean,

Speaker 16 I don't know.

Speaker 16 I'm not plugged into that world. This is just a lot of it is also posturing to get raises.
So I mean, I hope he doesn't leave Notre Dame, but we'll see.

Speaker 16 I don't know what you want me to say.

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Speaker 33 Jez, you can't talk about double-digit national titles when every single call of you winning the national title.

Speaker 18 Sounds like this. Oh, there's Chubby Checker running down the sideline.

Speaker 18 The audio, yeah.

Speaker 17 That's not true. Yeah.

Speaker 18 And there's a World War II veteran pitching into another white guy, and he avoids another white guy. Oh, my God, not a name.
The fighting Irish have done it again for the eighth time.

Speaker 18 I'm retired in white people.

Speaker 5 Stugats.

Speaker 17 Chubby Checker.

Speaker 18 I'm sorry.

Speaker 18 I'm sorry. He's black.

Speaker 17 He's black.

Speaker 18 And I was really, yo, it's a white name, Chubby Checker.

Speaker 17 And I picture, like, I'm sorry, man.

Speaker 18 I'm improving here.

Speaker 18 This is a pretty cool riff.

Speaker 17 He spells it differently.

Speaker 18 All right. His name is Chubby.
Maybe you didn't name it correctly. His name is Chubby Checkers.
There's an S at the end.

Speaker 18 I feel like that should be the largest of fives. Yeah, Chubby.

Speaker 18 Hey, it's Chubby Checkers. It sounds like a college football name.

Speaker 11 This is the Don Levatar Show with the Stukats.

Speaker 12 I have a question for you. I asked this earlier.
No one on the show could answer me.

Speaker 12 If Notre Dame needs to pony up extra money to keep Marcus Freeman, can they call the Pope and the Vatican and say open up the coffers?

Speaker 16 Well, I think he went to Villanova, so I'm not sure. And like, you know, there's

Speaker 16 different Catholic orders running both schools. So I would say it's a maybe.

Speaker 16 But if that's something that they have to do, like maybe Pope Leo's open to it.

Speaker 5 He's a Chicago guy, isn't he?

Speaker 29 It does lead to a legitimate question, which is Brian Kelly presumably left for a couple of different reasons, but also he did get a raise in leaving Dallas Hue, and money could have been one of the answers as to why on earth would he leave Notre Dame when he had so much success there.

Speaker 16 I think that is the main reason that he left. I think Notre Dame did not want to pay Brian Kelly.
This is just me guessing. I'm not really reporting this.
I think that

Speaker 16 Notre Dame had a long and very successful relationship with Brian Kelly that came with a lot of things that, you know, lose some tough losing seasons, embarrassing things, him screaming on the sidelines,

Speaker 16 him not ever getting the team to the place where they could beat in Alabama or Georgia. Obviously, it's a different era of college football now.

Speaker 16 And I think Marcus Freeman coming in when he did is much better positioned to beat those teams. I think there's way more parity in college football now.

Speaker 16 I think a lot of the advanced analytics bear that out. And I would say most importantly, the school is more aligned with athletics now than they were when Brian Kelly was the coach.

Speaker 16 I think they're more committed to actually helping the football team do things to win games

Speaker 16 without, you know, obviously sacrificing their identity, et cetera, et cetera. That's what Notre Dame would tell you.

Speaker 16 But I think that it's sort of hard to compare apples to apples because I do actually, I have seen a much bigger commitment from the school with Marcus Freeman and trying to make him successful than they ever kind of were with Brian Kelly.

Speaker 20 So like, I guess the really efficient question for me is, if it gets to the point where schools are offering and think they have a legitimate shot at getting Marcus Freeman for $15 million.

Speaker 28 Will Notre Dame climb up to that salary, make him the highest paid coach in the sport to keep him?

Speaker 12 And if they call the Pope, will he open the coffers?

Speaker 16 I don't know. I mean, Mike,

Speaker 16 who knows? I don't know. Maybe, yes.
I mean, they signed him to a huge extension last year. Clearly, you don't want to see him go, but also.

Speaker 31 Oh, my God, who knows?

Speaker 16 I mean,

Speaker 16 if you were asking me to speculate on, like, Notre Dame's financial

Speaker 16 acumen in this situation. Like, I think they have the money to do that.
Obviously, it doesn't mean they have the appetite to pay someone that much money.

Speaker 16 And I think a lot of these college coaching contracts are a little bit absurd if you're talking about coaches getting hundred million dollar buyouts to stick around in 10 years.

Speaker 16 And we have absolutely no idea what college football is going to look like in 10 years. But also, Marcus Freeman's current contract is not public.

Speaker 16 Speculated that he's paid amongst the three highest paid coaches in college football. So, I mean, I don't know.
We'll have to wait and see.

Speaker 12 Speaking of money, what did you make of the holiday bowl? Exploring the idea of a college football bowl game in Saudi Arabia?

Speaker 16 Oh man, this was one of those things that came out of some of the public records requests I believe from North Carolina. And

Speaker 16 from my reading on the topic, the holiday bowl has a bit of a financial strain because of the two games being canceled in 2020 and 2021 because of COVID.

Speaker 16 So they are looking to recoup some of that and be a bowl that can offer a higher payout to teams and would get more money if they did play in Saudi Arabia.

Speaker 16 It sounds like the ACC pretty quickly shut it down, but they were exploring that.

Speaker 16 The other part of it that's sort of funny is that the holiday bowl gets money from the city of San Diego because it has an obvious big economic impact on the city when they host the bowl game.

Speaker 16 And so if that were to be the case, if they were to move the game, they would have to give that money back, of course.

Speaker 16 It's not really that much money in the grand scheme of things, but it is to sort of demonstrate like the financial situation of a lot of these bowl games that have become a lot less prestigious now that there's 12 teams in the playoff and you know the holiday bowl used to be a game that was two of the better bowl bowl eligible teams would play and had a lot of good ratings in that bowl game it was more one of the higher tier like premium tier bowls really and yeah yes Greg really

Speaker 16 remember that I mean it's not like I mean it's yeah the one at San Diego I mean it's not

Speaker 16 it's not a New Year six bowl obviously but it's also not like you know the Bahamas bowl or one of these other

Speaker 16 smaller team bowls. It'd usually be like two.
I think Pac-12 and ACC are the two teams in the holiday bowl. Anyways, I digress.

Speaker 16 I think the point is that this kind of demonstrates the financial strain on a lot of these bowls in the 12-team playoff era. And I never ever want to see these bowl games go away.

Speaker 16 I would be devastated if we didn't have a full bowl slate

Speaker 16 in the postseason. But I understand that things are different now.
Things are changing pretty rapidly.

Speaker 8 Texas Tech has a ridiculous controversy going on. They have the Tortilla throw, which is adorable.
We celebrated it earlier this year with the Hamptons Farm Nuttiest fan.

Speaker 8 But apparently, the Big 12 wants them to stop. They're going to threaten penalties.
Texas Tech having one of their best seasons in a long time.

Speaker 8 Their head coach, we're about to play this sound, gave a way too serious press conference about Tortillas.

Speaker 32 This Kirby Holcutt their AD.

Speaker 37 The stakes are too high, and we need to help not risk penalizing our team again for throwing tortillas. Simply, let's not do it.

Speaker 37 The situation is on me.

Speaker 37 I leaned into this of throwing tortillas at the beginning of the football season. Now I must ask everyone to stop and I must ask our staff to enforce it on game days.

Speaker 20 I don't know why. I think that's funny.

Speaker 10 Why is his hair so dark? How did he lean into it?

Speaker 4 Like, what did he do?

Speaker 12 Well, he's reading also.

Speaker 8 I think earlier in the year, he was pushing back on the Big 12. Be like, how can he? He had the interaction with the coach where he's like, what do you want me to do?

Speaker 16 He was the only, I think he was the only Big 12 athletic director to vote no on penalizing the tortilla tossing in the offseason, which he did like as a stand. Like, I want to protect this tradition.

Speaker 16 But yeah, now that the Big 12 decided there's going to be 15-yard penalties if you throw stuff on the field, the situation has continuously escalated since the Kansas game a couple weeks ago, which we talked about last week.

Speaker 16 There was an alleged pocket knife being thrown, which now very clearly was not thrown by fans. They believe that it was dropped by a Kansas coach on the sideline.

Speaker 16 But still, the fines have continued to escalate. And so now the athletic director is like, no one can do this anymore.
I imagine there will be more tortillas than ever thrown this upcoming weekend.

Speaker 16 But I also thought it was funny because, Chris, to your point about like the seriousness of it, I read in the athletic that they're offering to let people discard their tortillas at the game by giving them to like officials who can dispose of them.

Speaker 16 So it's like, I guess you smuggle the tortilla in your pants. That's what people do.

Speaker 16 And then you get there and you have second thoughts and you're like, yeah, I shouldn't do this. I don't want to get ejected or banned from athletic department events.

Speaker 16 So I'm going to take the tortilla out of my pants and hand it to an usher.

Speaker 18 And that's a movie for me.

Speaker 16 Like the visual of that is very absurd to me.

Speaker 24 I do love a microwave tortilla.

Speaker 12 You know what I'm saying? I do love a microphone cough. Cody.

Speaker 17 Cody's gotten away from the cough, but and the cough got him so much that he let his mouth. Let me back up.
Let's see what

Speaker 17 he did.

Speaker 12 Oh, we didn't hear it.

Speaker 15 Is that a tortilla in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?

Speaker 23 What a waste of food, by the way.

Speaker 4 What a waste of time.

Speaker 16 Is that a tortilla in your pocket, or are you not happy to see me? Right.

Speaker 20 Yeah, that's a good point, by John.

Speaker 10 A soggy, damp tortilla in your pocket.

Speaker 23 If you offer that to the food bank, food bank goes, no, thanks. We're not that hungry.

Speaker 8 Is there a food that you'd prefer to see in thrown at stadiums?

Speaker 15 I don't like the idea of wasting food like that.

Speaker 20 You know, people are starving all over my neighborhood. There we go.

Speaker 4 I would give

Speaker 15 the stray cats in my neighborhood.

Speaker 19 What?

Speaker 15 Yeah, we have stray cats problem in our neighborhood.

Speaker 8 Some lady in my dad's neighborhood collected all the stray cats and had them fixed.

Speaker 31 Yeah, against their will.

Speaker 25 But you do it. Against their will.

Speaker 23 You do it for the.

Speaker 10 Do you think the spay or the neuter is sometimes with the will of the animal?

Speaker 19 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 15 Well, you ask the animal, and if they don't answer you, you go ahead.

Speaker 25 And they say, meow.

Speaker 12 Remember the no comment that the lion gave us earlier

Speaker 12 when we were talking about it. Thank you very much.

Speaker 15 By the way, a quick comment. I respect Amin trying to get a serious answer about the Vatican contributing to NIL and buyouts and stuff like that.

Speaker 15 If Notre Dame has an opening, why doesn't the Pope coach Notre Dame? Because I picture him on the sideline in full regalia with the big pointed hat, the whole bit.

Speaker 2 It would be a great draw, great television draw.

Speaker 15 Fans would love it.

Speaker 15 What's he doing? in the Vatican?

Speaker 3 I don't think. Now you're asking the right question.

Speaker 2 I don't think the Pope works real hard.

Speaker 15 I think he's got time to coach a football team.

Speaker 4 What's in the coffers?

Speaker 12 Bregan, imagine the endowment growth if the Pope was the head coach. Yes.
The boosters are coming out of the woodwork.

Speaker 5 Every Catholic in the world.

Speaker 16 I don't think you guys really are that plugged into the ongoing,

Speaker 16 I don't want to use the word schism here, but the ongoing disagreements that a lot of Catholics have over the last two popes.

Speaker 16 It may be very alienating. The Pope should, I mean, well, I don't want to get into too much here about

Speaker 16 as catholics you're supposed to be like yes the pope what the pope says you know that is what we believe to be true and a lot of catholics lately have been like well the pope's being a lib so we don't like him actually the whole thing about like feeding the poor we believe to be optional um so i don't know maybe you guys should just not be catholic anymore because when i grew up the reason that i have catholic guilt is because of the things that i was taught about like catholic social teaching and like helping people in need treating your neighbor as thyself but those things don't seem to be important important to a lot of Catholics right now.

Speaker 12 Jessica, I care about that.

Speaker 16 That would be quite controversial.

Speaker 12 Jessica, I care about you. You're talking right now like a character in a Dan Brown book who's going to get killed very soon.

Speaker 16 Wait, I mean, oh my God, this Louvre heist of the jewels, did you not think immediately of the Da Vinci Code?

Speaker 4 Of course.

Speaker 16 It was so good.

Speaker 12 The first thing I thought about was Rudy Gobert not being able to guard the high, pick, and roll.

Speaker 14 But then...

Speaker 12 Then I thought about Dan Brown and I realized that it wasn't a Dan Brown story because there wasn't enough misogyny in it.

Speaker 16 Oh, that's such a good point. You're right.

Speaker 12 Shirley, you and Amin have connected over Adam McKay's project, The Chair Company, right? We have, Dan. And don't call me Shirley.

Speaker 16 Amin, did you watch episode two?

Speaker 5 I am all the way caught up.

Speaker 5 That was good.

Speaker 26 So Leslie Nielsen doesn't.

Speaker 25 It's okay. Is that what it is?

Speaker 16 I love the old references that I actually understand.

Speaker 16 The thing about Tim Robinson shows, like I think you should leave and Detroiters, is I feel like I can't recommend them to everybody.

Speaker 16 I feel like I have to know you well enough to know if you're going to like really think it's funny or not. And I feel that way about the chair company.
I've been very...

Speaker 16 reserved in recommending it to people because I know that there's a lot of people that will watch that show and say this is the stupidest thing I've ever seen.

Speaker 16 But I'm sitting there watching it and I am laughing so hard at it. I think it is so funny.
It is a Tim Robinson scripted series on HBO Max or HBO. I think we call it, do we call it HB? I don't know.

Speaker 16 It's HBO Max.

Speaker 4 HBO Max. Okay, cool.

Speaker 16 It's a mystery, but it's also a comedy. There's perfect amounts of goof and also intrigue in it.

Speaker 16 And Tim Robinson sort of playing the same character he always plays, but just with more, I think with more depth than in some of his skits.

Speaker 12 So Jessica, the interesting thing about this, as opposed to his prior shows, is it's shot like a thriller suspense show.

Speaker 5 Yeah.

Speaker 12 It's not shot.

Speaker 12 Even I'm not just talking about it. It's kind of like a sitcom.
It's not a sitcom. It's down to the music, down to the camera angles and the shots.
It's all shot like a whodunit, basically.

Speaker 12 So there's, if you're not paying attention or if you didn't know anything about him, you go in, you're like, why is this such a silly shit? Why are they acting silly?

Speaker 12 Am I supposed to laugh here or not? But if you know, Tim Robinson is hilarious and it's very funny.

Speaker 12 The other funny thing is, I thought the name, the chair company, was going to be like an analogy to something or a metaphor. And it turns out to be very literally

Speaker 12 about a chair company. Not the one that he works at.
He makes malls, which, by the way, just when's the last time you were at a mall?

Speaker 16 It's been a really long time since I've been in a mall.

Speaker 10 I think you've been in a mall.

Speaker 5 You just probably didn't realize it.

Speaker 20 Mall gore.

Speaker 16 I don't think I've been in a mall.

Speaker 12 No, you've been in a mall. You just didn't realize it, probably.

Speaker 5 That's because they don't look like malls anymore. Is this a mall?

Speaker 4 Am I in a mall right now?

Speaker 5 I think you're in a mall right now.

Speaker 12 The restaurant. The restaurant is a mall.
Zaz was creeped out. Zaz was creeped out by by Friendship, the Tim Robinson movie.
He's made anxious by the awkward comedy.

Speaker 12 Really, it's just Robinson and Nathan Fielder who are doing this incredibly awkward comedy.

Speaker 10 I mean, I watched Friendship on my plane ride to Europe, what, a week and a half ago, and five minutes in, like, I'd never seen any of Tim Robinson's stuff, but I know the shtick.

Speaker 10 And it is my kind of humor. But five minutes into the movie, I didn't know if I was going to be able to get through it.

Speaker 12 Because I get very bad secondhand embarrassments and there were times in that movie friendship where i i thought i was going to have to hit the pause button and just go walk up and down the aisle and cool off oh man i got to see that with my good friend michael ryan right here who got me advanced screening passes to it and it was i like mike it it was such a great environment to watch with people i don't know it's a good movie have you had watched it with people as opposed to maybe that's why i because i watched it alone in my living room and i was just like okay i kind of know what they're trying to do here no i i enjoyed the movie.

Speaker 10 It's just like I was very uncomfortable.

Speaker 30 Sharing in the awkwardness with others though is an experience, which is why we need to bring our rated comedies backtrack.

Speaker 12 Speaking of awkwardness, I do have an awkward confession I need to make to Jessica.

Speaker 12 Jessica, we've been texting for a couple of months now. We talked about lethal weapon.
We talked about, like, oh, you're excited about this show. I'm like, oh, I love it.

Speaker 12 And up until this morning, I had no idea that that was you and you had changed your number.

Speaker 16 I sent you over the summer and I was like, this is my new number.

Speaker 12 I kept looking for context clues and I couldn't find them. And I was like, okay,

Speaker 12 I'm just going to keep having this conversation as if I know who I'm talking to.

Speaker 16 Okay, so what gave it away this morning?

Speaker 30 So Amin was asking me, look, I keep getting a message from this number and I have no idea.

Speaker 29 I'm like, read me the number. Maybe I have them in my

Speaker 35 contact list.

Speaker 31 What is it, Mike?

Speaker 30 And then he started rattling it off.

Speaker 24 I'm like, this has been Jess the whole time.

Speaker 29 And he had no idea.

Speaker 24 He thought you were pissed off at him.

Speaker 17 Yeah, that's the other thing.

Speaker 10 I've been texting you on your old number and all.

Speaker 5 She's not.

Speaker 12 They're green bubbles. I think she's blocked me.

Speaker 16 Jesus. I mean,

Speaker 16 first of all, I want to know what gave it away. Was it when I was like, hey, Hard Rock's not even that awesome? They're just like...

Speaker 12 That narrowed it down. I was like, okay, hold on now.

Speaker 4 Farts.

Speaker 20 Hold on.

Speaker 16 On Hard Rock Stadium, like, oh, it's a sports mecca. It's in the middle of nowhere.

Speaker 5 It is a dump.

Speaker 32 Easy South Bend.

Speaker 16 They had plastic in the nachos.

Speaker 16 that we got.

Speaker 23 There's plastic everywhere.

Speaker 32 There's plastic in people's balls.

Speaker 4 Exactly right.

Speaker 16 No, those are micro plastic.

Speaker 4 This was a macro plastic.

Speaker 16 This is the kind of plastic you have to get removed by a surgeon because it's lodged into your.

Speaker 20 Probably better, right, than the macro?

Speaker 4 That's why I lost $6 on the valuation.

Speaker 15 No extra charge.

Speaker 20 Put it on the...

Speaker 16 Scientists are sure what the microplastics are doing yet. So I would still like to.

Speaker 1 I can guarantee they're not good because they're not supposed to be there.

Speaker 17 Yeah,

Speaker 17 I mean,

Speaker 1 I can guarantee microplastics in my balls.

Speaker 12 Bad. I think they're great.

Speaker 14 I vermectin.

Speaker 16 Can we do Tony's top five health-related?

Speaker 26 We could. It'd be a great list.

Speaker 12 Check out her weekly Notre Dame podcast.

Speaker 24 Democratic shutdown stops.

Speaker 4 Finally, the guy,

Speaker 12 the Echoes with Mike Golick Jr.

Speaker 12 Again, weekly Notre Dame podcast. Jessica, thank you.

Speaker 19 Bye.

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Speaker 5 Don Lebatard.

Speaker 15 I heard that as a woman faking

Speaker 15 pain. I didn't think that sounded real.

Speaker 23 I really didn't.

Speaker 12 You know? It was not fake. It was in no way fake.

Speaker 4 If you can spot a woman faking it, Stugats.

Speaker 15 Yes, I can, Jess. Expert.
I've been married 40 years.

Speaker 11 This is the Don Lebatar Show with the Stugats.

Speaker 12 I wanted to get to the LeBron story that took us a half hour to get to the LeBron story where Zaz thinks LeBron's a liar

Speaker 12 after being called a liar by Jessica. And I guess Jessica has now walked that back.
You have proven to her because you're credible and a journalist and a lawyer and a judge.

Speaker 22 And a race war expert.

Speaker 12 You have once again proven to be someone who is credible. Your story was true.
Are you reporting something on LeBron, or do you have an opinion about LeBron lying?

Speaker 9 I have have an opinion.

Speaker 10 I have an opinion, which I think is correct. All right.
Dan, he's in world-class shape, this guy. All right.
He spends millions of dollars on his body every year on fitness.

Speaker 10 He spends millions of dollars. He doesn't have an injury keeping him out of games till mid-November, apparently, which then they're going to re-evaluate.
Okay.

Speaker 10 He has an injury that your grandmother has. All right.
Like, I don't care that he's 41 years old, 42 years old.

Speaker 20 World-class

Speaker 26 sciatica stinks i'm sure it does

Speaker 10 when you're when you're a grandma okay there is no way that this is straight out of the lebron playbook is what this is like last night the lakers losing even though luca looked awesome by the way

Speaker 10 right now right now luca's got to be at the front of the mvp conversation okay right now hold the ball to lose yes that's right right now Luca, he's at the top of the MVP conversation.

Speaker 10 LeBron, this is straight out his playbook. He loves that loss last night.
LeBron would love more losses because then, oh, look who you need to return.

Speaker 4 What are you alleging?

Speaker 12 What are you alleging here? Are you alleging he's withholding services?

Speaker 10 Yeah, I'm alleging super passive-aggressive behavior.

Speaker 4 Hold on. That's right.

Speaker 39 Time to throw away all journalistic credibility and get reckless. Here is something we like to call reckless speculation.

Speaker 12 You're good.

Speaker 10 Oh, you don't want me?

Speaker 10 You're not centering the team around me anymore. I'm not the number one guy.
You don't want to give me a multi-year deal?

Speaker 10 Okay, let's see what we look like when I have to be re-evaluated a month and a half into the season with an injury that your grandmother has. Get out of here.

Speaker 10 It's straight out the LeBron James playbook.

Speaker 12 I'm not going to go as far as to say he's faking the injury.

Speaker 12 As someone who's dealt with back issues for years, it happens. It doesn't matter how much you do.
Not like I do a lot, but still. But

Speaker 12 I will agree with you on this. Inside, he's not going to admit it, but inside, he's like,

Speaker 19 indefinitely.

Speaker 20 Crumble without me.

Speaker 12 Didn't you have gout?

Speaker 18 Yeah.

Speaker 10 I'm not in world-class shape.

Speaker 18 That's an old person like that.

Speaker 4 I'm not LeBron. We know this.

Speaker 10 I don't spend millions of dollars on my body every year. He has sciatica, and he's going to be re-evaluated in a month.

Speaker 21 Yeah, that's weird.

Speaker 31 That's weird.

Speaker 23 You'd think that, number one, if he were younger, he probably wouldn't have it, but you'd probably be more incentivized to play.

Speaker 30 This could also be a low-key thing that he gets on the same page with the front office.

Speaker 32 Hey, let's wait and see.

Speaker 30 This is kind of like player maintenance a little bit, potentially, no?

Speaker 12 Hold on. I just remembered something.
So Steve Nash had sciatica, right? That was why Steve Nash, when he'd be on the bench, he'd be lying on his back. Seems like LeBron's sitting on the bench.

Speaker 12 Probably not a good thing for sciatica. Two and a half hours or something?

Speaker 5 Nothing wrong with him.

Speaker 12 Wait a minute.

Speaker 12 The reason actually that I would say that that is imprudent, it's not even

Speaker 12 the unethical idea that he would be faking injury in order to just lie and collect money and load manage.

Speaker 12 The reason that it's not wise is Luke will take that team and go 17 for 27 without him out there for the rest of the season.

Speaker 12 Like that not having to share usage rate with LeBron James is the best Luca that there is.

Speaker 12 Like he doesn't, if he doesn't have to share the ball with anybody, he will go 17 for 27 in every game he plays the rest of the season.

Speaker 10 Well, they need to win. Like, if they're losing, who cares?

Speaker 12 By the way, how long before they go full metal jacket on DeAndre Eaton?

Speaker 23 Yeah.

Speaker 12 They're putting bars of soap in socks. He stinks.

Speaker 17 I was like, oh.

Speaker 20 Domination.

Speaker 10 They won. Like, Dan, that team minus LeBron, like, that team's not that good.

Speaker 25 There was, I mean, you want to call LeBron a liar.

Speaker 24 The New York Post had an article that was interesting that might lend credence to this.

Speaker 26 There was a Laker group chat that had all the Lakers' players in it.

Speaker 36 Anthony Davis was on that team.

Speaker 27 Anthony Davis was traded from that team and announced it to the group chat. Now, what we know about this trade and what we assume is that Lebron knew this was going.

Speaker 12 Do you have Anthony Davis's actual words from the group chat?

Speaker 25 Yeah, in the group chat.

Speaker 26 Well, I'm not going to say all the words.

Speaker 13 Did these guys just trade me?

Speaker 12 You said these guys?

Speaker 4 You didn't say guys.

Speaker 31 And LeBron, WTF.

Speaker 20 Yeah. Okay.

Speaker 23 After Anthony Davis left the group chat.

Speaker 20 Caught him off guard.

Speaker 12 Wait, he said that after he left the chat?

Speaker 21 The way that I understood the article was, did these guys just trade me?

Speaker 32 Anthony Davis leaves group chat.

Speaker 13 LeBron James, WTF, in front of all his teammates.

Speaker 10 It's got to be hard to be a phony all the time. It does.
It has to be hard.

Speaker 5 Greg?

Speaker 15 What would be LeBron's incentive for faking an injury?

Speaker 2 So late in his career.

Speaker 31 Getting paid for it.

Speaker 15 I have to figure every game he plays is a gift.

Speaker 31 Why would he fake an injury?

Speaker 6 Give me more money. Give me a multi-year contract.

Speaker 32 He doesn't view it the same way Joe Flacco does.

Speaker 10 You think my time's up right now? All right, let's see how you do without me.

Speaker 30 That's the incentive.

Speaker 29 Getting paid the same amount of money to not play and prove a point.

Speaker 12 Well, I don't even think it's to not play. I think it's to prove the point.

Speaker 12 It's about you need me. Oh, you don't think you need me? Watch this.

Speaker 10 I'm not the number one option anymore. I'm not the guy you should come to with all the decision-making questions.

Speaker 4 Okay, let's see how you do without me.

Speaker 24 But take into account what we just said about how we assume LeBron James was behind the scenes, understanding that Rich Paul's client, Anthony Davis, was going to get moved.

Speaker 24 That establishes some sort of buy-in that we're getting away from Anthony Davis and we're bringing in Luca.

Speaker 35 Now,

Speaker 24 I'm not putting it past LeBron to be like all about that move and then once it happens to use it as a point of resentment for the Lakers.

Speaker 21 Is that what we're alleging?

Speaker 13 Because they don't mesh together. Him behind the scenes,

Speaker 13 forcing Anthony Davis out and bringing Luca in to help him win a championship, and then being upset when Luca arrives to the team, being a younger superstar, being the very clear and obvious face of the franchise going forward.

Speaker 5 How does this mesh?

Speaker 12 Seems very familiar to the story from your own Weitzman of him being very pro-Russell Westbrook out loud and behind the scenes, kind of like, get him out of here, get me Curry Irving.

Speaker 31 You saw what I was doing.

Speaker 26 I was asking the question for the audience, but I know what he's doing.

Speaker 5 He's playing Boucherche.

Speaker 12 The thing that we're not talking about from last night and talking about everything from basketball last night is that it is in game one interesting to watch Golden State when Jimmy Butler wants to go get 16 free throws, makes all 16 free throws, says after the game that he's bet Steph Curry that he's going to shoot better from the line this year than Steph Curry.

Speaker 12 Why are you waving him off?

Speaker 1 He's in game one.

Speaker 7 Game one. Talk about Syati.
That guy backs out in like two weeks.

Speaker 10 Right now, though, Jimmy Butler's in the MVP conversation.

Speaker 1 Not as high as Luca, though. Don't even dare.

Speaker 5 Do you agree or you don't agree?

Speaker 10 I don't agree. He's got to be in the conversation.
He's in the conversation.

Speaker 1 He's not number one, though. Shangun,

Speaker 23 Shangun ahead of Jimmy Butler.

Speaker 20 The gooner. The gooner.

Speaker 32 I'm back in basketball this season.

Speaker 1 He is an all-star.

Speaker 23 That guy is good.

Speaker 4 That guy's great.

Speaker 10 MVP race right now, tight.

Speaker 4 Man, you know about that Shangoon?

Speaker 20 Not that tight.

Speaker 12 The Rockets are getting rewarded for tanking.

Speaker 5 This team needs a point guard.

Speaker 20 The Rockets are.

Speaker 12 They have

Speaker 12 so many young players from just double.

Speaker 4 Everybody's 6'11. The entire team is 6'11.

Speaker 5 He's got 6'11 guys running around all over the place.