Hour 1: Megapod with Calvin Johnson

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Speaker 11 This is the Dan Labator Show with the Stoogats Podcast.

Speaker 12 So as a lot of people know, I'm a big fan of Kirby Enthusiasm.

Speaker 12 One of my favorite episodes of all time is, well, one of my favorite seasons is when they're trying to do the Seinfeld finale finale, right? The way it should have been done.

Speaker 12 But my favorite episode that season is when Michael Richards is suffering from this disease and he's really worried and he doesn't want to do the show because he's worried about his health.

Speaker 12 And And Larry David says, no, my boy Danny Duberstein had it, and he's fine.

Speaker 12 And so Michael Richards says,

Speaker 12 can you put me in touch with him? And Larry says, sure. And he goes to Jeff and he says, Jeff, give me Danny Duberstein's number.
I got to give it to Michael Richards.

Speaker 12 And Jeff's like, Danny Duberstein's dead.

Speaker 12 When did he die? Like, two years ago. How did he die? He died of that disease that Kramer has.

Speaker 7 It's a really serious disease.

Speaker 12 So Larry now realizes he can't tell Michael Richards Kramer this. So he gets Leon to dress up as Danny Duberstein to go tell him if everything's going to be okay.

Speaker 12 And Michael Richards says, your name's Danny Duberstein. He's like, yeah.
He's like, you're Jewish? You've been bar mitzvahs?

Speaker 13 He's like, three times.

Speaker 12 It's like, I thought it only happened once. Oh, no, sometimes you got to re-up the mitzvah.
I bring all this up because Zazzle turned to me and says, you know, I got some bar mitzvah gifts.

Speaker 11 I got a bar mitzvah story for you.

Speaker 4 You're not going to believe it. Well, maybe you will believe this.
I don't know.

Speaker 11 I'll let you decide. I can't predict the future.
So

Speaker 11 my mother sends me a message yesterday. All right.
She texts me and she tells me, Jonathan, can we, you know, can I come over this weekend? You know, maybe we could do dinner at the house.

Speaker 11 I was going through a bunch of my stuff recently and I found some very, she capitalized very,

Speaker 11 some very interesting stuff you may be interested in.

Speaker 12 Oh, no. I don't want to hear that from my mom.

Speaker 11 Now, I don't know how she thinks that I'm going to wait until Sunday to find out this very interesting thing that she's found.

Speaker 11 So I said, of course, yeah, you can come over this weekend, but what did you find?

Speaker 4 All right.

Speaker 11 So, when you're a bar mitzvah.

Speaker 12 Three times.

Speaker 11 It's only once.

Speaker 12 And sometimes you got to re-up the mitzvah.

Speaker 11 And my bar mitzvah, you feeling like you haven't done the mitzvah recently? You got to re-up it. My bar mitzvah was 31 years ago, okay?

Speaker 4 And...

Speaker 12 And you didn't play GoldenEye?

Speaker 11 I told you what I was doing.

Speaker 11 So, when you get bar mitzvah, you get gifts. You get a lot of good gifts.

Speaker 11 But you always got that one or two or three family members who get you the shittiest gift possible sweater oh it's the equivalent of a sweater the shittiest gift possible you can get when you're bar mitzvah dreidel and all man treitel's a terrible bar mitzvah guest for a hanukkah playa just sit back and listen

Speaker 11 every jewish young man knows exactly what the worst bar mitzvah gift is that you could possibly get and the worst bar mitzvah gift that you could possibly get is a bond

Speaker 4 James Bond's worst. It was right there for everybody.
We were all tripping over one another. No.
We were like the Oklahoma Sooners coming out before old men.

Speaker 4 James Bond.

Speaker 11 It's an Israeli bond. And you get the little note that they also planted a tree for your ass.
All right.

Speaker 4 In Israel. In Israel.
Yeah. Not even a U.S.
bond. An Israeli bond.
An Israeli bond. It's basically the same thing.

Speaker 11 And they planted a tree for my ass, too. Now, I can't even tell you how much I don't care about either one one of those things.
A tree?

Speaker 4 I care about one of them very deeply.

Speaker 11 So, you get the Israeli bond, you forget about it.

Speaker 11 And my mother tells me she found a bunch of bonds for my bar mitzvah.

Speaker 4 Oh, all right, hold up.

Speaker 11 How much money? She found a bunch of bonds that were never cash and have accrued money

Speaker 11 over the last 31 years.

Speaker 4 Are you about to tell me you're a millionaire?

Speaker 11 And not only that, by the way, not only that,

Speaker 11 but a gift that I used to get when I was young as well. Really young.
I used to have these Disney stocks.

Speaker 4 Oh, no.

Speaker 12 You're a millionaire. Shut the hell up.

Speaker 11 My mother found Disney stocks in my name from a little kid.

Speaker 4 Let's buy the black stocks.

Speaker 11 And Israeli bonds that I didn't give a shit about for my bar mitzvah, and I hate it as a gift. Well, neither of those have been realized.
Neither of them have been cashed.

Speaker 11 And she's bringing them to my house this week.

Speaker 4 Let's buy the Seattle Sounders.

Speaker 4 Let's do it.

Speaker 11 I don't have the exact number yet, but they're worth thousands of dollars. So, how about that?

Speaker 4 Hold up. I got a guy.

Speaker 11 What are you disappointing? It's amazing.

Speaker 4 How many thousands? You didn't say tens of thousands.

Speaker 11 I don't know yet, but it's thousands of dollars.

Speaker 4 I didn't say tens of thousands.

Speaker 15 Timeout.

Speaker 12 I have to explain something to the audio audience. We just had a graphic go over our screen.
When I say

Speaker 12 to use the word amateur does not exist.

Speaker 12 Please run that graphic again to celebrate Zaz's newfound wealth.

Speaker 11 Yeah, look at that. Look at that.
I'm like Richie Rich.

Speaker 12 I'm back anti-Soro.

Speaker 4 That's right.

Speaker 4 Anti-Sora, man. What is that?

Speaker 11 So

Speaker 11 I'm about to dive into it headfirst like Scrooge McDuck. So

Speaker 11 my mother is coming over with my bonds that I hated when I got for my bar mitzvah and a bunch of stocks from Disney, which I believe my parents got for me when I was a little kid.

Speaker 11 And neither of them have been cashed and now they're mine.

Speaker 12 Are you saying their current value, thousands of dollars or were they thousands of dollars back?

Speaker 11 No, like the bonds.

Speaker 4 So here's a hundred dollar bond, you know? Right. Yeah, but compounds over 30 years.
Right.

Speaker 11 That's monstrous. Right.
Right.

Speaker 12 I need someone to look this up for me. Israeli bond 31 years ago, which is what?

Speaker 17 19. 31 years ago.

Speaker 12 94. 94.
What's it worth today?

Speaker 4 I'm on it.

Speaker 12 I need to find out. And you said you had multiples of bonds.

Speaker 7 Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 4 Multiples of how many? Just so roughly. I don't know.
I didn't ask. She's bringing it over.

Speaker 12 And then the Disney stock is from the 80s.

Speaker 11 Yeah, definitely. Dog.

Speaker 12 He might be able to buy this offer.

Speaker 4 What are you talking about?

Speaker 11 That's right, player. From the 80s.
That's right.

Speaker 7 Found money.

Speaker 4 So you don't know exactly how much this is. I don't know yet.

Speaker 11 But I can tell you, I already know what daddy's buying. All right.
You want to take a stab at it, Mike?

Speaker 4 Las Vegas Aces.

Speaker 11 No, no, it's not. John Cena tickets.

Speaker 4 Bingo. Oh, that's price, guys.

Speaker 11 All right.

Speaker 11 that's right now we're going to see now i don't care how much those tickets are your boy we're gonna see john cena in dc next month saturday night's main event now the question is what is my wife gonna say when she realizes that's what i'm spending the money on blew all the money on because these tickets are very expensive we're talking several thousand dollars is sitting near the ring and obviously that's what your boy does when he goes to the big wrestling matches.

Speaker 11 So what is my wife going to say? I don't know.

Speaker 12 We're going to find out. Does she know about the bonds and the I told her yesterday?

Speaker 7 Yeah.

Speaker 4 Just explain to her that it's John Cena's last match.

Speaker 11 Yeah, she'll probably understand. No, why did I tell her? Because what's going to happen when I buy the John Cena tickets and she sees how much it costs?

Speaker 4 I've seen it. You know what I see?

Speaker 11 Of course she's going to see. Why would she see how they cost? Because we have a bank account.

Speaker 15 No. What do you mean?

Speaker 11 No bank account.

Speaker 11 We do have a bank account.

Speaker 12 You got to have another bank account. No, no.

Speaker 4 You have the shenanigans accounting.

Speaker 11 I'm not one of these crazy couples that have separate checks.

Speaker 12 You got to have a shenanigans account.

Speaker 4 Shenanigans LLC. Come on, man.

Speaker 11 Nah, nah, nah.

Speaker 11 We have a mutual check-in account.

Speaker 12 Shenanigans Incorporated.

Speaker 4 Okay, well, I don't have one. Excellent.
Come on, man.

Speaker 11 So your boy's going to see John Cena because the lamest bar mitzvah gifts ever.

Speaker 15 That's good. That's right.
Hold on.

Speaker 12 Your boy has to ask permission to see John Cena.

Speaker 4 All of this is wrong. Yeah? Yeah.

Speaker 8 Which part?

Speaker 4 The fact that you might be sitting on substantial money and I get to see John Cena once I run it by my wife. No, no, no.

Speaker 11 There's no running by my wife.

Speaker 4 That's exactly how that went. It's Tywife 20%

Speaker 4 boys i got some bad news oh oh no the zaslow mansion

Speaker 8 may take a little bit of a hit here no the value of an israeli bond from 1994 depends entirely on its face face value specific to what type it is was it a jubilee was it a mazotov or was it a maccabee i don't know okay and its interest rate and maturity date uh israeli bonds from 1994 would have matured some time ago most israeli bonds have a maturity of up to 10 or 15 years though some bond types are shorter or longer and generally generally do not accrue interest after maturity.

Speaker 11 Okay, well, but when it matured, how much am I talking about here?

Speaker 8 I think it said from 100 bucks, it might be 164.

Speaker 4 No way,

Speaker 4 check out the Disney stock. No way.

Speaker 11 My mother told me it's thousands of dollars.

Speaker 4 She may have been wrong. How much Disney stock? Do we know?

Speaker 4 I don't know. I don't know.

Speaker 12 Do you remember what year? You said you were a little kid.

Speaker 7 80s.

Speaker 11 It's got to be late.

Speaker 12 85. Let's say 87.
87. Sure.
Running man year.

Speaker 4 I thought these were the worst gifts, man.

Speaker 12 They are the worst gifts.

Speaker 16 They're the worst gifts.

Speaker 12 No, they are the worst gifts.

Speaker 12 Ass off to Richard Dawson, man.

Speaker 11 Yo, don't try and rain on my parade here, Tony.

Speaker 4 I'm just trying to help you, buddy.

Speaker 11 My mother knows. She told me it's worth thousands of dollars.

Speaker 8 I don't know if she knows.

Speaker 11 She knows.

Speaker 4 When I think about the holidays, I think about the little moments with my dog, Roma. The ones that make the season feel special.
Pull little elf ears on her. You know the deal.

Speaker 4 Take some selfies, posted for people that probably seen it too much. I love my dog.
That's what I'm trying to get at. That's why I'm joining Chewy Claws, who's out here making pets' wishes come true.

Speaker 4 From November 4th through December 24th, you can share your pet's wish at chewy.com slash chewy claws. It might come true, and it helps others too.

Speaker 4 Every wish triggers a donation of five meals to shelters and rescues across the country. And if you share your pet's wish through the Chewy app, they'll double that donation.

Speaker 4 That's 10 meals for pets in need just for participating.

Speaker 9 I've been using Chewy for years, legitimately.

Speaker 4 They've made my life easier for me and my dog Roma. Food, toys, meds, all of it shows up fast, no stress.

Speaker 4 And being part of something like Chewy Claws, where a small thing like a wish can make a real impact, that's the kind of stuff I care about. Every pet deserves a wish come true.

Speaker 4 Send your pet's wish to chewy.com/slash chewyclaws. It might become a reality.
Plus, your wish means Chewy will donate five meals to pets in need.

Speaker 8 This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. So these days are just getting shorter, right? It's dark at like 4.30, 5 o'clock now, and I swear it's messing with me.
And that's when it hits you.

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Speaker 4 Folks, the leaves are turning. The weather's getting a little chillier.
That means the football games are more important. That means football time should be Miller time.

Speaker 4 Game day hits different with a Miller light in your hand. From jaw-dropping touchdowns to fantasy heartbreaks, my fantasy season's over already, but you know what makes that better? Miller time!

Speaker 4 It's the beer that's been there for every moment. 50 years of great taste, simple ingredients, and that iconic golden color you can spot from across the room.

Speaker 4 And here's the kicker: it's just 96 calories, 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces. The original light beer since 1975 and still hitting different five decades later.

Speaker 4 So, whatever your game day looks like, remember Miller time is always a good time. Miller Light, great taste, 96 calories.
Go to millerlight.com/slash Dan to find delivery options near you.

Speaker 4 Or you can pick up Miller Light pretty much anywhere they sell beer. It's Miller time.
Celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin, 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.

Speaker 4 Don Lebatard. My algorithm on Instagram is, dance, all boobs.

Speaker 4 Stugats.

Speaker 11 It's a good algorithm.

Speaker 4 This is the Don Lebatar Show with the Stugats.

Speaker 12 Bob Tony does the research on the Disney stock from the late 80s. I want to talk about how Mad Dog reacted to some of the Dodgers kind of shenanigans, to use that word again.
You have that clip?

Speaker 18 When you're a national broadcaster and you're the voice of the sport on the big stage, when you did a million playoff games, and then they, in one of the crippling losses that a franchise is going to have in the history of the sport, that's as bad a loss as you're ever going to have.

Speaker 18 And I got Joe basically, the body's not even cold yet. And I got Joe at Dodger Stadium doing the freaking Dodger parade.

Speaker 18 oh my god that's bad i'm sorry i don't care what you say you can say i'm a uh i'm a you know uh screaming and yelling about nothing that that would piss me off if i'm a if i'm a blue jay fan i got show davis shaking everybody's hand give me a freaking yoma shaking freaking uh so otani's hand and he's freaking wacky getting rings

Speaker 18 for the world series you think kirk gaddy was getting any of this nonsense

Speaker 18 you think gary giola was doing the parade in 82 with the Cardinals?

Speaker 11 I was wondering what he was doing.

Speaker 18 Oh my God. And he's got the trophy right there.
God, if you're a Blue Jay fan, you're vomiting right now. That is bad.
I don't care what you say. That is, you could say I'm being hard.

Speaker 18 That's ridiculous. Chris, what's the big deal? He does the games.
Nonsense.

Speaker 18 He's the voice of the World Series. He's supposed to be right down the middle.
Obviously, he's whooping his ass off for the Dodgers in the World Series. And everybody who I spoke to hated the idea.

Speaker 18 They sensed he was doing for the Dodgers throughout the World Series. And his call at the end was ridiculous.

Speaker 18 You got to be a champion and knock that whatever he said about knocking a defending champion out. And then he's waxing poetic about Kershaw at the end of the game that nobody in America cared about.

Speaker 18 Oh, my God.

Speaker 18 That's bad. And that's wrong.
And that's not the way you do it. I don't care.
Call me anything you want. Call me an old man on a hill screaming, get off my lawn, say anything you want.

Speaker 11 That's bogus.

Speaker 18 The Dodgers should be in. The Dodgers should have done him a favorite joke.
You know what? You're the voice of the team. We just want a classic.
Why don't you lay low here?

Speaker 4 We'll get some of those figures.

Speaker 4 It's like

Speaker 18 we'll get Daniel, David Dasse, those the three in once you lay low. This is not the time for you.
You're the voice of baseball in postseason play.

Speaker 18 You can't be doing our parade, waxing poetic about us at the Blue Jays' expense. Wrong.

Speaker 18 Top of the hour.

Speaker 4 He's going to get a ring, Joe Davis.

Speaker 12 Of course he is.

Speaker 15 He's the voice of the Dodgers. Yep.

Speaker 12 He's the only guy other than than Vince Cully to call Dodgers games.

Speaker 11 Right, for people who don't understand, not only is Joe Davis the voice of the Dodgers, but in that parade, like he's the MC.

Speaker 13 Which is typical.

Speaker 15 Yes.

Speaker 12 Fitzgerald up in Golden State, he's the MC every time they win.

Speaker 11 See Goldstein each year, the Panthers, absolutely.

Speaker 16 That's typical.

Speaker 5 Yes.

Speaker 12 If the Knicks win the championship,

Speaker 12 Mike Breen is going to be doing that.

Speaker 12 Mike Breen is also the guy. I guess that's the difference in that Joe Davis and Mike Breen are also the guys that do the call for the national broadcast.

Speaker 12 But I think all of us can agree they're very professional. I never watched that and for one moment thought, oh, this guy wants the Dodgers to win.

Speaker 11 I got to tell you, if I'm a Blue Days fan,

Speaker 11 like dogs going nuts over it, if I'm a Blue Days fan, God, I don't care.

Speaker 11 I just don't care.

Speaker 12 I want to vomit because we lost. Right.
Not because the guy who called the game is like,

Speaker 12 that's him at the parade.

Speaker 4 What's he doing there?

Speaker 11 I do agree with Dog there. I didn't like the final call.

Speaker 4 I thought it was a weird.

Speaker 12 You didn't like it? I thought it was a weird final call. They always try to do something like

Speaker 5 with gravitas.

Speaker 11 Yeah,

Speaker 11 I'm with Dog on that one. I didn't like it.

Speaker 13 So you think it was nonsense.

Speaker 12 He's the boys of the World Series. He's supposed to be right down the middle.

Speaker 12 Obviously, he's rooted his ass.

Speaker 4 Yummy.

Speaker 12 If we can get just the

Speaker 11 It was a clutch move.

Speaker 4 Like he knew, oh, I'm in trouble here. I don't have that one.
Perhaps

Speaker 12 he pulled the red cord.

Speaker 8 By the way, doing a little investigating here with Disney stocks.

Speaker 11 How much do I owe? How much do I have?

Speaker 4 Now you're talking, okay? Israeli bonds? Cooked.

Speaker 12 I don't think it's cooked, man.

Speaker 5 Sorry to tell you.

Speaker 4 I think I get a lot of money, but you got 60x. I don't think you know how bonds work, buddy.

Speaker 8 I don't think you know how bonds work, but with stocks. Okay, so I'm looking at 1987 is kind of the year that we said.

Speaker 4 Could be earlier, could be later, but whatever.

Speaker 8 The price for those Disney stocks was $348 at that time.

Speaker 8 Disney's trading right now for $109.

Speaker 17 There you go.

Speaker 17 A little bit of a down year

Speaker 4 for Disney.

Speaker 8 But to what mike said which what i what i was looking up what i wanted to see is there's been many stock splits so that's good when they split so good for people that don't know in the investing world a stock gets to a certain point they split it and it creates more stocks right double up so you had one there was a ninth march of 1986 so hopefully you got them in before 86 which we don't know but there was a four for one stock split

Speaker 17 then in may of 92 another four for one stock split

Speaker 4 the movie started

Speaker 4 if you're looking hell yeah when the movie started rolling out, they were like, oh, we got this.

Speaker 8 July of 98, a three-for-one stock space.

Speaker 4 Hell yeah.

Speaker 17 So now we're looking at even more.

Speaker 4 I'm pretty sure I'm rich now.

Speaker 11 The most recent split, it goes actually June 07. Give me my money graphic.

Speaker 8 One for one split.

Speaker 4 So you're looking at four, four, three,

Speaker 17 and another split.

Speaker 11 I'm looking at being rich is what we're looking at.

Speaker 8 So you're looking at potentially...

Speaker 8 Again, we don't know the number of stocks you have. We'll find that out when your mom shows up.

Speaker 11 Probably enough enough to retire.

Speaker 4 Better hope.

Speaker 12 342 to 109.

Speaker 12 Split. But with all the splits.

Speaker 4 Split 11 ways or more.

Speaker 11 All right, if I'm not here Monday, you know why

Speaker 18 Give me a freak

Speaker 18 shaking freaking

Speaker 4 Obama. I found out why it's called Begonia.
What's it called Begonia? Begonia refers to a classical myth about a ritualistic method to spontaneously generate bees from a sacrificed bull's carcass.

Speaker 4 Now, part of the backdrop of this film is the two kidnappers blame this tech CEO for a bee colony collapse.

Speaker 18 Yummum!

Speaker 4 Hey, you guys want to play a game?

Speaker 12 Let's play a game. What do you got?

Speaker 4 I got real or fake podcast. Oh, I love this game.

Speaker 10 So I'm talking about it.

Speaker 11 Listen up. Time to think fast.
Is this a real or fake podcast?

Speaker 4 That's pretty much the rules. You guys have to figure out if something is a real or fake podcast.
Sometimes it may seem easy, sometimes it may seem very difficult, but we have fun along the way.

Speaker 4 First one up:

Speaker 4 The Keith Bullock Show.

Speaker 4 That's just what it's called? Is that a real

Speaker 12 or fake podcast? So, the question here is: Does Keith Bullock have a podcast?

Speaker 11 Right, yeah, so I'm gonna go real then.

Speaker 12 Well, don't look it up. What do you mean?

Speaker 4 Don't look at anything up.

Speaker 4 Special message.

Speaker 11 Don't look at anything up. How dare you?

Speaker 12 I'm going to go fake. It's too straightforward.
I don't think he has a podcast.

Speaker 7 The Keith Bullock Show is

Speaker 4 fake. Yeah.
Oh.

Speaker 12 Just too straightforward. Although, I like it.
I like it as a change up there, Mike.

Speaker 4 Free range with Vaughn Miller.

Speaker 5 Oh, that's real.

Speaker 12 I'm going fake. That's real.
Vaughn. What does free range mean?

Speaker 12 Like cowboy shit, man. He always be wearing cowboy hats and stuff.
He's not cowboy shit. He's cowboy.
I'm I'm going free range.

Speaker 4 He's cowboy shit.

Speaker 8 He's got farms. Got chickens.
Yep.

Speaker 12 Free range. I'm going real.

Speaker 11 It is a brand new real podcast.

Speaker 15 I'm two for two.

Speaker 11 Megapod with Calvin Johnson.

Speaker 12 I feel like if Calvin Johnson had a podcast,

Speaker 12 we would have heard about it and also wouldn't have called it Megapod.

Speaker 4 Why? His nickname is Megatron.

Speaker 12 I know, but Megapod.

Speaker 4 It almost makes too much sense.

Speaker 11 Just admit you didn't know that was his nickname.

Speaker 12 I didn't know the Georgia Tech grad was named Megatron.

Speaker 4 I'm going real.

Speaker 12 I'm going to go fake.

Speaker 12 Fake.

Speaker 12 Three for three, baby.

Speaker 4 Next one. Pugilist specialist with Lennox Lewis.

Speaker 4 Wordy,

Speaker 12 way too erudite.

Speaker 12 That sounds like Lennox Lewis to me. Who, by the way, do you guys know this?

Speaker 16 He grew up with Russell Peters, the stand-up comedian.

Speaker 12 Like, they're friends. Like, his mom knows him and everything.

Speaker 4 Perhaps it's something they cover in Pugilist Specialist.

Speaker 12 I'm going to go real.

Speaker 12 Saz?

Speaker 4 He's thinking. Yeah.

Speaker 2 You know what Pugilist means?

Speaker 11 Yeah, no. Do I look like someone who doesn't know what Pugilist means?

Speaker 16 You look like a little confused, bro.

Speaker 11 All right, stop talking.

Speaker 4 I'm going real.

Speaker 4 Tony, you want to venture a guess?

Speaker 15 It's fake.

Speaker 4 It is indeed fake.

Speaker 12 I'm three for four.

Speaker 4 And finally, clipboard Jesus with Charlie Whitehurst.

Speaker 11 It's got to be fake. No one's calling himself Jesus.

Speaker 4 His nickname when he played was Clipboard Jesus.

Speaker 4 Do you know that?

Speaker 4 I actually don't know that.

Speaker 4 Someone didn't know a nickname, huh?

Speaker 4 I'm going real.

Speaker 4 It is fake. Ah, shit.

Speaker 12 That's a tough game. Three for five?

Speaker 4 Hey, that's still a success. This game can be really hard sometimes.

Speaker 12 I did it. I did it, man.
I lived it. You know what I love? I love, I watch Pluto TV, TV, and they always have ads for,

Speaker 12 what's my man, the fighter

Speaker 12 and the kid or whatever, that podcast. They have a million ads for it every time.
And I'm just like, should I be advertising on Pluto TV? Because I don't know if you know this, Zaz.

Speaker 12 Pluto TV is a future.

Speaker 4 Why? What's so good about it?

Speaker 7 I always see the app.

Speaker 4 We're going back to channel surfing, pal. Oh, man.
Oh, really?

Speaker 7 Yeah.

Speaker 11 I always see the app, but I never click on it.

Speaker 4 You got YouTube. You got Disney fighting.
I'm sick of all of it. I pay hundreds and hundreds of dollars, probably equal to the Israeli bonds that you have in streaming services.

Speaker 11 You pay a lot then.

Speaker 4 And still I sit down and I'm like, I don't want to watch any of this stuff.

Speaker 4 I miss, as a child that grew up in the 90s, I miss channel surfing.

Speaker 12 You just grab a remote and go up, up, up, and then you see something on your screen that's already in progress. I'm like, you have my attention.

Speaker 7 I'm a Pluto TV guy now.

Speaker 12 Pluto TV. Let me tell you where Pluto TV is most clutch.

Speaker 7 The most clutch.

Speaker 11 Do you have to pay a subscription for it?

Speaker 15 It's free.

Speaker 4 It's free. What? Gratis.
Yeah.

Speaker 11 And you get channels again. You get ads.

Speaker 12 Not anymore ads in regular television. Yeah.

Speaker 11 Regular television. What kind of channels you get?

Speaker 4 Dude, the channels are outstanding. If you like movies, we got that.
There's just a 90s movie channel that Forrest Gumplin.

Speaker 13 So why don't I have Pluto app?

Speaker 7 Just get it.

Speaker 4 I don't understand why it's not. It's free.

Speaker 4 So this is the new thing.

Speaker 12 Mike, you travel a lot. I do.
You see more and more of these hotels.

Speaker 4 I know exactly where it's the most clutch.

Speaker 12 Where?

Speaker 4 Airbnbs.

Speaker 4 slash hotels

Speaker 12 you get you get into the hotel room and i'm like okay you got local news all right

Speaker 12 oh oh msnbc nbc of hox and all that stuff okay well hello you got a pluto tv i get in there and all of a sudden you know what i'm doing i'm tuning into that bar rescue channel yes i'm watching back to back they have a channel that just shows bar rescues

Speaker 4 bar rescue they have to just show you like i love lucy i love lucy might be jonathan taslo may say to himself man i love lucy i don't well there's an entire channel dedicated to I Love Lucy.

Speaker 4 Did you like MTV, but in the 90s? We got a channel for you.

Speaker 12 Zaz, how about the A-Team? Would you like to just watch the A-Team episodes back-to-back to back?

Speaker 4 I'd like the A-Team. You have an A-Team channel.

Speaker 12 Hey, do you want to watch black movies from the 90s specifically?

Speaker 4 And they'll hit you over the head right on the nose. That's what it's called.

Speaker 2 Black movies from the 80s.

Speaker 4 Wow.

Speaker 7 The Golden Child.

Speaker 4 Followed by Beverly Hills Cop. Yeah, on Pluto app at any given time.
Booty Call is on, Forrest Gump is on. Predator is on.

Speaker 7 All of them.

Speaker 4 And Bob Ross just painting away. You want to watch Bob Ross?

Speaker 19 Non-stop? Not really.

Speaker 4 Are you high off your ass? Want to melt in your couch?

Speaker 12 Bob Ross channel. Did I mention that they have a bar rescue channel? And if you love Bar Rescue, there's a new podcast called Here's the Science of Bar Rescue Podcast.
It's me, it's Zach Harper.

Speaker 12 It's Chelsea Reynolds. It's Colin Caster.
Get it wherever you get podcasts. Support it, especially if you work in industry.
Especially, we're having guests.

Speaker 12 If you work in industry, especially if you worked at a bar that was rescued, a bar rescued bar, you're going to come on our show. We're going going to ask you about the experience.

Speaker 4 That's a great title for the pod. Here's the science.
Yeah, I love how he would just

Speaker 11 rescue by bar rescue.

Speaker 4 You just give people

Speaker 11 here's the science.

Speaker 12 Mike, did you know that if you get a customer to order food, they're more likely to stay up to 50 minutes longer?

Speaker 5 I do know that.

Speaker 12 Yeah, that's the kind of science you learn on here's the science.

Speaker 13 But back to Pluto TV.

Speaker 15 Dude,

Speaker 15 it is the future.

Speaker 4 I saw a bartender scoop ice with a glass.

Speaker 12 Oh, no. They screamed, shut it down.

Speaker 4 Yeah.

Speaker 4 You can't be doing that.

Speaker 19 Yeah, why can't you do?

Speaker 11 Because you can break the glass.

Speaker 4 You're going to kill somebody. You're going to kill somebody.
Yuma.

Speaker 7 Ice looks like glass.

Speaker 12 You got to burn it. You don't know this?

Speaker 11 No, I don't know about Pluto. That's why we're talking about it.

Speaker 19 We're talking about bars. It used to be a planet.

Speaker 4 Telling you. Pluto TV.

Speaker 4 We're all going to go back. We're going back, Jack.
If you watch, I love what WPLG did, which is like, we don't need ABC. We'll just be live and local.
We're just going to concentrate on local.

Speaker 4 They even have some heat games. Like, we're just, if you live in Miami, we're for you.

Speaker 4 That's how I learned it.

Speaker 12 That's how I learned about the fire.

Speaker 4 As everything is artificial and algorithmic, people are going to be gravitating to something that is grittier,

Speaker 4 more real, more sense of community.

Speaker 4 And also, they're going to realize, man,

Speaker 4 this shit was better in the 90s. Oh, my God.
I miss channel surfing.

Speaker 12 And Pluto TV does that it says you know what I love so for instance that bar rescue channel you would one would think I was like okay so they start with season one episode one and then two and no no no no no no it's all random it's all random from all eras of the bar rescue show it reintroduces that feeling of mystery I don't know what's coming next that's the thing that kids are missing they don't know about that how you used to be turned on the TV like oh this is my favorite episode of the fresh prince of bel air and then you just sit down and then the next episode is like, wait, Aunt Viv is back to the old Aunt Viva.

Speaker 12 Yeah, because that's how it is, man.

Speaker 4 I was watching the Bob Ross channel last night and I saw a rerun. It was one that I saw when I was in an Airbnb in DC for MLS Also.
I'm like, I've seen this one. This one's great.

Speaker 4 I watched the whole thing twice.

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Speaker 4 Don Lebatard. I went in the margins.
I'm like, I'm like. You're money ball of sex? I'm basically Scott Hatterberg.

Speaker 4 Stugats. A lot of walks, but I'm on base.

Speaker 4 When it comes to sex,

Speaker 4 other dudes, they can be GMB.

Speaker 8 You know your role you play with?

Speaker 4 I know my role. This is the Don Lebatar Show with the Stugats.

Speaker 12 Mike, if I may, I've got Pluto TV in front of me right now. I'd like to shout out some of the channels and what they're playing.
Yeah, go through the program.

Speaker 12 First channel I've got in front of me called TV Land Drama.

Speaker 10 What is that about?

Speaker 12 They've got shows like Jag. Right now, Diagnosis Murder is playing.
Solid. Right?

Speaker 12 Go Street Blues?

Speaker 12 Diagnosis Murder.

Speaker 4 Prognosis Negative.

Speaker 4 Is Matlock on that one, or does Matlock have its own channel? Because I know Colombo has its own channel on Pluto.

Speaker 12 I think Matlock has its own channel. Good.
We've got a Bobby Flay.

Speaker 4 I just want to watch Matlock and only Matlock.

Speaker 12 We've got a Bobby Flay channel. They're playing brunch at Bobby's slumber party.
We've got a...

Speaker 9 Was it Brunch or was it a slumber party?

Speaker 16 Well, it's a little bit of both.

Speaker 15 They woke up.

Speaker 16 Guess what? At Bobby's place.

Speaker 4 What's for brunch?

Speaker 12 We've got BET throwbacks right now. Oh,

Speaker 12 five minutes left in an episode of Hanging with Mr. Cooper.

Speaker 2 Oh, that's great.

Speaker 4 Do they play old rap cities?

Speaker 12 No, because next we have Everybody Hates Chris, which is also a great, great one. Hey, would you like Pluto Trending Now? How about you watch 28 Days Later, the movie? Ooh, I want to see that.

Speaker 12 There you go.

Speaker 16 What about Pluto Icons?

Speaker 12 You want to watch Mermaids, Winona Ryder, Cher?

Speaker 16 Nah.

Speaker 4 No? No, but that's why you keep flipping the channels.

Speaker 12 Hey, hey, hey, hey, my friend here. He's never watched James Bond.
Could it be that there's a Pluto 007? No.

Speaker 4 The world is not enough? No.

Speaker 12 Right now, two hours and 35 minutes left.

Speaker 12 Followed by Die Another Day.

Speaker 4 You know who did the song for the world is not enough oh let me think adele no no garbage

Speaker 4 zaz how about the world is not enough james bond uncovers a nuclear plot while protecting an oil heiress from her former kidnapper an international terrorist who can't feel peaceful and the sequel to that that sounds good was die another day you know you know who did the song to that

Speaker 4 Adele no Madonna.

Speaker 8 James Bond is sent to investigate a connection between North Korean terrorists and a diamond mogul who's funding the development of an international space weapon.

Speaker 4 Ooh, you know,

Speaker 4 weapons, man.

Speaker 12 Hey, Roy, I want to watch a movie that has Wesley Snipes, but it's based on a Michael Crichton book.

Speaker 11 Passenger 57.

Speaker 12 Not a Michael Crichton book.

Speaker 4 You ever see Skyfall?

Speaker 4 Nah. You know who did the song for Skyfall?

Speaker 15 Let me think.

Speaker 4 Drop Zone.

Speaker 11 Adele.

Speaker 4 Actually, you're right there. Oh, there you go.

Speaker 12 Knew it. When the Sky Falls, right? That was it.
The Art of War was the answer. Oh, The Art of War.
Yeah. You know, I could watch the Art of War?

Speaker 11 What was that? Sure it wasn't Passenger 57?

Speaker 12 Pluto Action, followed by the Art of War II, Betrayal, and The Art of War 3.

Speaker 12 I don't even know what that sequels to this movie.

Speaker 4 Yeah.

Speaker 12 How about Pluto Reaction? We got Species, The Awakening.

Speaker 4 Ooh.

Speaker 12 How about Pluto Fantastic? Divergent, the Divergent Series. How about Pluto Comedy, the 430 movie, followed by Bull Durham?

Speaker 19 How about Pluto Drama, Coach Carter, followed by Amistan?

Speaker 4 How about Pluto Romance, Clueless, followed by Sleepover? How about

Speaker 13 BET cinema on Pluto?

Speaker 12 Jackie Brown.

Speaker 4 they have a ton of movies that you would watch if you were just flipping through the channels but when you sit down on your couch you have decision fatigue you're like david blatt you're a fighter pilot i got so many options i just can't make a single one please pluto make my decision for me clueless that sounds lovely i can half pay attention to that thank you hey mike you want to watch jackie brown when that's over you can watch flight

Speaker 11 i'm drunk right now that plane was upside down you saw my boy denzel work should have given him a medal landing that plane upside down.

Speaker 12 Tony, this one's for you. Right now on Pluto Thrillers,

Speaker 5 The Running Man.

Speaker 4 Oh.

Speaker 12 Followed by Basic Instinct, by the way.

Speaker 4 Oh, yeah, baby.

Speaker 12 Mike, you like horror movies? How about Succubus? That's on right now, Pluto Horror.

Speaker 13 On Pluto Terror, we've got Scream 3.

Speaker 12 On Pluto 2000s replay, we have Joe Dirt.

Speaker 4 On Pluto

Speaker 12 90s throwback, saving Private Ryan. Pluto 80s Rewind Platoon.

Speaker 12 Pluto 70s cinema rancho delights movie channel pluto i don't know why that's a damn i honestly want to strip away all my other apps here in you talk right now like there's there's no reason if you why am i why am i hbo maxing well because i'm on there that's why i'm hbo max let me tell you something if they they told me you're destitute all you can afford is your internet bill and that's it can't afford netflix and that's the max all right look i'd miss them i'd miss them but you know what will keep me warm at night pluto tv it's just great for when you don't know when what to watch by the way they also have have an on-demand section.

Speaker 2 Now, I'm going to miss my sports.

Speaker 4 I'm going to miss my sports. I like my Premier League soccer.
That's why I keep it on the cock. But I love the cock.
Yes. But movies flipping through.

Speaker 4 Sometimes you don't know what you want to watch, and you need them to speak to you.

Speaker 12 Can I say something? Let me speak directly to our friends at NBC and Peacock.

Speaker 11 Look right at your camera.

Speaker 4 They do have fast channels.

Speaker 12 They do have some of those. They do.
They do have fast channels, and I do appreciate that.

Speaker 4 You like that Stone Phillips? They got you.

Speaker 12 This is what I need from them, though. Look right into your camera.
I need insights to excellence, a fast channel for that. I was looking for it this week.
Didn't get an episode.

Speaker 4 Oh, they're mansing.

Speaker 11 You yearn for it.

Speaker 12 Getting antsy.

Speaker 4 Isn't it a little crazy that he used one of these episodes to lament load management?

Speaker 5 Lament. Why is that crazy?

Speaker 12 He didn't lament.

Speaker 4 Well, because he did this all-in-one shooting.

Speaker 12 He didn't lament it, Michael.

Speaker 12 He didn't lament it.

Speaker 4 Lamentable ball. I mean, I'd like to see fresh ones.
I'd like for him to talk about Tiago.

Speaker 12 This is fresh. Have you seen it before?

Speaker 12 Express, then.

Speaker 4 But I'd like for him to react to Tiago Splitter and what he's in this incredible turnaround. The Portland Trailer.

Speaker 8 I wanted to hear about Tar Eason.

Speaker 4 Yeah, say, tell me more about Kaysen Wallace.

Speaker 12 A.J. Mitchell's getting more minutes.
Tell me more, Michael.

Speaker 4 Definitely real names that I've heard before.

Speaker 4 Oh, man.

Speaker 4 I just want, just right here.

Speaker 12 Give me a belt. You got a belt?

Speaker 4 You ain't got a name. Oh, man.
You wear belts? No.

Speaker 12 Me neither.

Speaker 11 Trying to be comfortable, dog.

Speaker 4 I don't wear belts ever. Yeah, me neither.

Speaker 12 Never won a belt.

Speaker 12 Y'all end up on this Insights to Excellence?

Speaker 4 I like it. Yeah, I like it too.
I like it.

Speaker 16 Yeah, I don't like the tone. I like it.

Speaker 4 Why?

Speaker 12 It's great.

Speaker 4 I want more of it. I want more of it.
That's why I said I like it. I'm just like, like, I like them.

Speaker 12 I was disappointed, Peacock, this week. Like, where was it?

Speaker 4 That's why I only said I like it because I was looking for it this week and I couldn't find it.

Speaker 14 Let me tell you right now.

Speaker 15 You give me some.

Speaker 4 Instead, I got Atlanta and Orlando.

Speaker 17 Good game. Yeah, but no Insights to Excellence in in the middle.

Speaker 5 Yeah, good game, though.

Speaker 4 All right, here we go. Right here.
Wow. Our new exercise interactions right there.

Speaker 12 That's what I needed right there.

Speaker 17 Wow, making me uncomfortable. Is it?

Speaker 12 I mean, that's how you get the veins popping, man. You ever play train spotting? You know about the train spotting?

Speaker 11 Yeah, I know about train spotting, but I never played train spotting.

Speaker 12 How do you spot the train then?

Speaker 4 You ever free base?

Speaker 4 Buddy.

Speaker 4 Richard Pryor did.

Speaker 5 I invented free base.

Speaker 7 Too soon.

Speaker 4 Too soon. No, you didn't.
Tooon.

Speaker 4 Too soon. Come on.

Speaker 12 Respect the legend. You got singed eyebrows, man.

Speaker 17 Mountain Dew bottle.

Speaker 12 Look, here's the deal, man. Some people like to play it fast and loose.

Speaker 4 Get some of that blivion. Yeah.

Speaker 15 Marching.

Speaker 4 You don't have to deal with any of the nose stuff.

Speaker 19 Too uncomfortable.

Speaker 12 Start to sneezing. Now everyone's mad.

Speaker 4 You just need a hit. Just one.
Just one. You don't have to deal with the nose running at all.
This is stuff that people that I know have done this, have told me.

Speaker 8 Nose.

Speaker 4 Look, man, y'all hear?

Speaker 15 It's like you're a bird.

Speaker 12 You see this? You see this around the Elser?

Speaker 7 All these turkey vultures?

Speaker 4 Gliding, gliding.

Speaker 12 You know what they're doing?

Speaker 11 They're free basing. That's what it's like?

Speaker 16 That's what it's like, baby.

Speaker 4 You'll be chasing that first high for the rest of your life.

Speaker 12 Oh, my gosh.

Speaker 4 Or so they say. Wow.

Speaker 4 It sounds great. Right around the corner.
But it will destroy your lives.

Speaker 12 That's what Insights to Excellence feels like to me.

Speaker 7 Just destroy your life?

Speaker 12 Like, I'm going to abandon all of my responsibilities. That's why, Tony.
That's why they give it to us in micro doses. Because if they gave you the whole shebang,

Speaker 12 we'd all be like, it'd be like pulp fiction. Someone needs to stab us in the heart with an adrenaline needle.
Wake us up.

Speaker 11 OT adrenaline shot.

Speaker 12 Yeah, man. Could you do that? You think you could do that to someone?

Speaker 11 Like, can I be the person who

Speaker 4 would you ever like

Speaker 4 to do that?

Speaker 4 Yeah, you look around, like, okay, I guess I'm the person that has to put this adrenaline needle in

Speaker 4 his heart.

Speaker 8 I could do it.

Speaker 11 You think you do it? You gotta do it hard enough to smash through the breastplate, though.

Speaker 11 I could do it.

Speaker 4 You could? Got to stab her three times? Like, no bit?

Speaker 11 No, you don't got to stab her three times.

Speaker 4 No bit? Like, would you?

Speaker 15 Could you?

Speaker 4 Yeah. You know what the heart is, right? Yeah.
Yeah, you know

Speaker 4 of it.

Speaker 12 That's right here. Tony, can the Rockets keep this up all season long?

Speaker 17 That's a good point.

Speaker 8 I'm looking around saying, all right, two big, three big, five big lineup.

Speaker 7 Like,

Speaker 8 is at some point, Amin, like, Amen Thompson going to be the answer point guard? Obviously, Fred Van Vlee, we know he's out.

Speaker 8 Feels like they're not going to make a trade for a point guard anywhere.

Speaker 17 So it's like, all right, we're going to let Amen play.

Speaker 11 Yeah, why do they need one? Like, he's a really big point guard.

Speaker 8 Sure, but like, he's still super raw and super green at playing the position, right? It's like the same thing as Cooper Flag. Like, oh, we're playing him at point.

Speaker 16 Figure it out.

Speaker 4 Sure, okay.

Speaker 8 But then when everything slows down in the playoffs, is he going to be 82 games worthy of like, all right, I know what I'm doing versus having his entire career of playing basketball and knowing how to play point?

Speaker 8 Like at some point, something's got to come to a head.

Speaker 8 Either they're going to be the biggest team and just maul everybody, or they're going to get to a point where in the half court, it's going to be like, oh, shit, KD, here's the ball.

Speaker 12 try and do something I like the idea like they

Speaker 12 they played Memphis last night and they went small and by small I mean they started Thompson Jabari Smith Shingoon Josh Okogie Kevin Drain everybody's like 6'10. It's like that.

Speaker 12 That's their small lineup.

Speaker 12 Like

Speaker 12 Thompson in the playoffs, decision making left a lot to be desired. And

Speaker 12 it was understandable.

Speaker 12 Energy, young guy, first time in the playoffs, playing against Golden State, Steph Curry. So there is some jitters there, but I hear what you're saying.
It's like, you need that kind of old head.

Speaker 12 Fred Van Vliet, Mike Conley. These guys are just like, everyone settle down.
I got you. Don't panic.
I know they've scored a couple.

Speaker 12 What we're going to do is we're going to organize this thing and get it going.

Speaker 11 Another good game for Jaw last night.

Speaker 12 Why are you on Ja, man?

Speaker 11 What do you mean, why am I? It's the biggest story in the league right now.

Speaker 4 What do you mean, why am I on Jaw?

Speaker 12 Like, it's...

Speaker 11 And I'm monitoring him.

Speaker 4 Got monitoring.

Speaker 12 I'm monitoring him, but like, I'm not going to be like, oh, yeah, here goes Ja. Another 6 of 19 performance.

Speaker 4 Why wouldn't you?

Speaker 12 Because I know what's happening. What's happening is he is at odds with his coach.
And by the way, they asked him about that too. Do you guys see this? Tuamas Isolo?

Speaker 17 Last night?

Speaker 12 Last night?

Speaker 12 Because

Speaker 12 Jaron Jackson didn't have a great game either. And so they were asking him about that.
And he said, and I've got the quotes right here. Believe me.

Speaker 8 It was a weird start, though, too, because Jaron Jackson, like, you figure, all right, if they're not building around Ja, they're going to build around Jaron Jackson.

Speaker 8 But then he has six, six shots in a game, and you're like, uh, who are we building around?

Speaker 12 He said his efficiency has been up about Jaron Jackson. I think he's shooting the best, blah, blah, blah.
Obviously, for us in this situation, we'd love to have him more involved in the offense.

Speaker 12 Like, today, I'm looking at these numbers, and they are what they are. I can't really trust them.
So, obviously, the half-court offense is not in sync.

Speaker 8 I don't know. And it looks it, by the way.

Speaker 12 How do you feel about the energy levels? Like I said, very inconsistent. It comes and it goes.
We need to do a better job.

Speaker 8 You're in the NBA, like, you know what you need to do unless you don't.

Speaker 4 And that's the weird part about it, right?

Speaker 8 Like, it just seems like everybody's in flux in Memphis, and you got one guy who's fighting with the organization. You got one guy who got paid, and he's like,

Speaker 8 I guess I'm going to do what they tell me to do, even though, like, I don't really know what we're doing. Just a weird situation.

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Speaker 14 Find your Zen and keep finding rewards that fit your lifestyle at zinn.com/slash rewards.

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