Banana Margarita That Fucked a Brunch Station at a Resort (ENT S3E22)

Here's to the finest crew in starving.

When it comes to my crew, you won't get any argument from me.

This is a parody.

Paramount owns the sun.

Welcome to the greatest generation.

It's a Star Trek podcast by a couple of guys who are just a little bit embarrassed about having a Star Trek podcast.

Maybe today, most of all, I'm Ben Harrison.

I'm Adam Pranica.

We've been wanting to do this specific episode for, I think, two weeks now.

Almost two weeks.

I was going to say three?

Jesus.

Because, yeah, it got kicked a couple of weeks ago because I was very sick.

And then last, it was scheduled for,

it was like, it got rescheduled like way out from that.

Yeah.

And then last week we were about to do it.

And then you got sick.

You're like stealing my material here.

What's wrong with Ben this time?

That is the thing about the game of buttholes,

the will of the Riker,

is that when you land on a square like we did, the Zindiark square, where the host must take shots of five different alcohols during the episode, you got to make a plan for that.

You can't just do that like a regular episode.

You really can't.

Certainly can't do it when you're sick.

No.

And I don't know if you can hear it in my voice.

I'm on day seven of a COVID and then double sinus infection run I've been on.

Very Ben-like.

My doctor just told me

I had the Bens.

And I knew exactly what that meant.

Did they put you in a hyperbaric chamber?

This is how the other half lives.

Yeah, man.

It's really been an eye-opener.

How are you planning on doing this?

Because I kind of Maybe I misremembered the way it is described on the game of buttholes, but I kind of thought the spirit of this was doing it like all at once right up front.

Oof.

The Zindi Arc Square is not specific.

Here is what it says word for word.

Okay.

The hosts must take shots of five different alcohols during the episode.

During the episode.

So it has to happen within the confines of the record.

I didn't quite know how to do this.

I don't have five shot glasses.

I have one shot class that a friend of DeSoto sent in.

Yeah, who has five shot glasses anymore?

I don't know.

That's college shit.

That's college shit.

I've only ever had this one.

So

what I realized is they sell shot of alcohol.

Like airplane shot?

Yeah, so what I did is I went to the liquor store and I bought five shots.

Wow.

And what I tried to do is get a spectrum at'em.

So I've got

things I want to drink at one end of the spectrum.

For example, a little adorable bottle of Diplomatico, one of my favorite rums, which is not always available because of the various political

tragedies that befall its home country of Venezuela.

I got a bottle of La Gritona, a tequila, that

we've taken to calling my daughter La Gritona because she screams a lot.

She's just that type of baby.

And then like further toward the don't really want to drink end of the spectrum, I got one that I've always been curious about.

99 Bananas,

which is a high-proof banana liqueur.

I think you're going to like that one.

You and I have talked about creme de banane quite a bit over the years.

Yeah.

I've seen the like the airplane bottle of 99 bananas like discarded in gutters my entire life, but I've never actually tasted it.

How could you not be looking forward to drinking that?

Well, it sounds amazing.

It's gutter liquor.

I've got Fireball, which is oh yeah a classic i understand this to be a popular shot alcohol but i've never personally tasted it as far as i can remember i just want to i want to hit pause on the record for a second and just and just look at all the fods in the eyes and like like the nods of recognition we're all sharing right now like we could have presumed that ben would have never had a shot of fireball in his life fireball basically the shot that you're given when when you are drinking age legally.

I don't know why.

I just never, I don't think that they had it, maybe.

I don't know.

Fireball has been so prolific in and around my friend group over the decade

that

I don't know that we've ever had a hang without it.

Wow.

Wow.

It's like a handshake between us.

Is it good?

Like, is it a like, we like this, so we always have it?

Or is it a, we feel obligated because this is the kind of shot we take and it's a tradition it's just easy i think that's what it is here's the bet though that i want to put on the board will ben like fireball okay i kind of feel like though it is a long shot for it to be yes i kind of feel like you'll like it i think i might like it yeah um the last one

is uh the funniest shot that they had at the liquor store that I went to.

It is Eggo Waffle Branded Liqueur.

It is a waffles and syrup cream liqueur.

It's called Ego Brunch in a Jar.

You can see that it is a creamy daddy in the jar.

You know what it looks like, Ben.

It looks like rum chata.

Yeah, that was kind of what I was thinking.

Another thing that I've never tasted is rum chata.

Do they sell the mini shot of rum chata?

That would be fun.

I looked around.

I didn't see that one.

I went to a total wine, which tend to have like a very prolific.

Yeah, near the register, they have a fun little impulse buy

selection

that have a lot of these things.

And it's like tons of stuff and stuff that you've never seen in airplane bottle format before.

Yeah.

Well, Adam,

how are you going to be doing this?

You're going to be lining up bottles and pouring out shots?

Ben,

I can't do this in my condition.

I really can't play the game the way the game has told us to play it.

Like, I think it would be irresponsible.

Are you fucking kidding me?

To take shots right now.

I know, but you're better.

You're better now.

Right?

I'm not better.

I'm still fighting.

We've been waiting three weeks to do this.

I've got a mug of throat coat in front of me.

I've been on Afrin for three days straight and behind the counter, SudaFed.

Oh, man.

I don't think I can play.

I didn't realize this was like a flu game for you.

I thought you were back in business like we recorded yesterday.

Oh, yeah.

And those were terrible episodes, I thought.

Personally, I sounded like a hacking, sneezing mess.

Excuse me.

I hate disappointing you.

I think

you are the person I hate to disappoint the most in my entire life.

And I feel your judgment, I of Sauron.

No, no, no, no, no, no.

That's not where I'm coming from.

I don't want people to think I'm trying to bully you into drinking when you're not feeling well.

But I also have a reputation of dodging the consequences of this game.

I've done it before.

Now people are going to think I'm doing it again.

I've gone to a lot of trouble here, and I feel like I'm going to do this.

Are you going to take a ring check?

And I think what we need to do is there needs to be a sort of Zindy Archocles hanging over you, and we can trigger

this on a future episode when I know you to be of sound mind and body.

I mean, famously, the rules of the game stipulate that you can veto a square, and then what you do is you trigger the watching of a quantum leap episode in the bonus feed.

Can I just go and do that by myself?

Just a solo app on quantum leap?

Yeah, just do a This American Life solo quantum leap thing over there?

Nope, can't do it.

Can't allow it.

You're going to have to make this right with the friends of DeSoto and with me

at such time as your body has recovered from your bout with the novel coronavirus.

I can't argue with this.

Like, I feel like this is a suitable outcome.

Like, I can't not do this.

I have to do it.

I've always made up my dodges in this game, haven't I?

The ledger is even.

Some would allege, allegedly.

I accept the terms of the agreement if the terms are as follows.

You today will be doing the Zendi Arc Square on the Game of Buttholes.

Oh, there's the cough for sympathy.

I like it.

As a consequence for my not doing it this episode,

you will have in your back pocket a Zendi Arc card to play

that I would hope is played somewhat responsibly in a like if you're aware that I have a thing going on that night that would

be catastrophic were I to wander into it with five shots in my birdie.

Adam is meeting with his lawyers about some unspecified business concern.

A friendly five-shot Zindi art card is issued to you for future use, and I will accept the terms of that agreement.

Virtual handshake style.

Well, the terms of a much higher stakes agreement are being discussed in today's episode of Star Trek colon enterprise.

Do you want to jump into that, Adam?

I do, Ben, but first I want to know, like, when are you going to start taking shots?

I'm going to start right now.

And I think I'm going to start at the eggo end of the spectrum,

the one that I'm dreading the most.

I am fascinated by this choice.

I would have saved the sweet and

underage style drinking shots for the end, but you're starting with the sweet.

I'm starting with the sweet.

Cheers to you, man.

I'm going to do a little delayed gratification.

I'm going to save the ones that I am most excited about for the end.

This thing, it smells like a bowl.

Do you remember waffle,

what was it called?

Like, it was waffle crisp cereal?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Was that a cereal?

Yeah.

Yeah.

That's what it smells like.

It smells exactly like that.

It's going to taste great then, if that's the case.

Yeah.

It might lacerate my mouth the way that cereal did.

All right.

Bottoms up.

Welch.

All All right, there goes the shot, and here goes the episode.

It is Enterprise Season 3, Episode 22, and it's called The Council.

Got a free speech and guitar.

Oh, it's like maple eggnog.

Doesn't sound so bad.

Hey, what's the proof on that, BT Dubs?

That one is lower.

I think that one was 20%.

I read the proof and not the percentage when I was grabbing it.

And I was like, oh, this is a full power thing.

I'm also like working my way up over the next three because the fireball, I think, is 30%.

And then the 99 bananas, obviously, 49.5%.

It's a lot of bananas.

We got a very hard-boiled last time on.

Some of the ruggedest shit that the entrepreneur has encountered on its way to the events of today.

And then, like, speaking of getting the bens, like, we're out of the last time on and into this ethereal white space

where all of these transdimensional sphere builder ladies are, I mean, they're scheming, so it's not like there isn't tension in the scene, but it just feels like very, like, you know, oh, this is like, this is nice.

They got kind of a heavenly vibe to where they hang out.

They have the kind of meeting where there is no offense taken to not looking at each other during.

Everyone's kind of looking past each other.

It's that kind of vibe.

Yeah, it is that kind of vibe.

There's the one transdimensional being who has been seen like glowing into Zindi Council meetings, who I would wager is kind of fucking up by the measure of the other transdimensional beings attending this staff meeting.

She's kind of gotten the job of get the expanse ready for our invasion.

You know, if you believe the narrative that Archer is pushing,

that's her job.

And the timelines are not going the way they want them to.

And they're like, get it together.

FODs will probably agree that I'm the degenerate gambler of the two hosts of this show.

This felt to me very much like a, we made a bet on a thing and the line has changed.

Not in our favor.

And now we got to figure out whether or not we're going to hedge or maybe get involved, like with talking to the horse race horse owner, you know, see if we can't put something in the food

or whatever.

Like, should we take a heavier hand here?

Sneak a little bit of sponge material into the horse's nasal cavity.

Right.

No one's happy about the odds of the Zindi weapon

usage decreasing because everyone's bet very heavily on it being used.

In the context of you having made a bet and the line changes, do the pay terms change also after?

No.

So you're locked in at the terms you place the bet at?

Because they're not, right?

Like the line changing for them means worse for them.

No, no, I mean the line changing for them is just for everyone in line to bet that game or competition after you to deal with.

Okay.

Yeah, sure.

Well, the house always wins, and they ain't the house, it turns out.

And they're pretty stressed, and they need, like, number one sphere builder lady to get her shit together and get on these Zindies to make it happen.

Kill the Earth.

Yeah, I mean, that's collectively the decision at the end of this, is like, we're going to become more involved because we have to be.

And after the theme, we cut over to Enterprise and Dagger's ship flying side by side.

And in Six Bay, Dr.

Flox tells to Paul that there is no longer any Trellium in her system.

And that's great, right?

This scene really made me realize how much starships don't have a waiting room in Six Bays.

Because, like, you should not be able to just walk in to where somebody like, what if somebody is having the doctor check to make sure they're not getting like a hernia in their

testy satchel, you know?

Where do you go for that on a starship?

Tripp walks in and is like, what's going on with TePaul?

Why is she here?

What's her medical need at the moment?

And they have to shut the fuck up immediately because they're talking about some secret shit.

I had exactly the same thought.

I don't know if a waiting room is something you have room for on a ship of this configuration, but at least a lock on the door seems like a good idea at this point.

Yeah, like an

on-air light kind of situation.

Like

HIPAA rules in place, please wait in the hallway kind of deal.

Trip does does the what's her deal at Dr.

Flox as if he could or would possibly tell him.

Yeah, he's good at this, though.

Like, Flox

has some game when it comes to deflecting and slithering out of a tricky question like this.

TePaul is out, and Flox is like, Yeah, Trip, if you think that anybody on the ship hasn't been having a rough couple of weeks,

you're deluding yourself, basically.

Yeah.

Trip's in there for some shoulder tightness.

He hasn't quite been

getting as much spin on the slider as he's used to.

All this extra weight on my forearms.

You wouldn't think that a little bit of erectile tissue

would weigh you down so much, but there you go.

And speaking of clenched up, it doesn't seem like he's going to ever come around to the idea of Degra being persuaded by Captain Archer.

He's in the background of this whole thing, kind of shaking his head still.

He really is.

I did feel like Fox kind of put his foot in his mouth here saying, oh, yeah, I don't know how you could possibly think ill of Degra.

He seems like a pretty straight down the middle dude.

You know how there are

some people you don't talk about other people around under any circumstances?

It seems like Degra is that to trip.

Really is.

I was amazed at how Trip let this go.

Like, maybe this is just like the 2025, everybody is like redressing everything

to the hilt with each other all the time.

But I was like, oh, Trip, kind of just like let that go.

That was a very uncalled for way of putting it by Dr.

Flox.

And Trip was like, hey, man, knock it off.

Anyways, moving on.

I think this may be an example of Dr.

Flox getting a pass from everyone because everyone likes Dr.

Flox.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Maybe he has like alien assumptions about what people want to talk to him about.

I mean, he's never been one to avoid an awkward conversation.

He kind of launches right in.

Not at all.

In a way that I think we've appreciated over the last couple of seasons.

Yeah.

So over in the control room, TePaul is telling Degra about the spheres and how they may have some kind of smoking gun evidence about who built them.

Like, are these people that we are accusing of being the sphere builders, in fact, the sphere builders?

And Dragra is very interested in getting some evidence like this because he's already been persuaded by all the other stuff that Archer has shown and tell him up to this point.

But they're now going to go before the wider Zindi Council, and he would like some evidence in the back pocket to persuade the rest of them.

So he's very eager to help them.

Like, he's like, I'll give you everything we've got on our sphere research from our database, and you guys can research that too.

Part of the presentation that kind of bumped me for a moment was like the theory is that these spheres are being controlled by AI.

Did you hear that part?

Yeah.

Huh.

That's unusual.

Everyone's hoping that like by at least cracking open one of these spheres and taking out its computer core for study, they will have a little bit more intelligence about the sphere builders.

Yeah.

Instead, they're going to find like a picture of the sphere builder and it'll have like six fingers and, you know, like the folds on their clothes won't make any sense.

I'm like, oh, that's not how things wrinkle.

Yeah, it's got all the wrinkles wrong.

But this is going to be like a little side quest that they send a shuttle on, and Reed is going to be in command of that mission.

And he is meeting up with a Mako who has something in his curriculum vitée about doing EVA combat training?

Yeah, this Corporal Hawkins, who seems real excited about this, more than Worf ever was.

He does not like zero-G combat.

I remember it made me sick to my stomach.

Corporal Hawkins absolutely does.

He's like, it's my favorite kind of combat, gives him nowhere to go.

And

I was amazed at how quickly the shuttle left the ship.

Like, this was an away team that got assembled and launched really quickly.

If we change the words,

then it's fair use all day long.

Meanwhile, Degra is over on his ship getting all of the info about the spheres together to send to the entrepreneur when sphere builder Numero Uno shows up to try to persuade him to tack in the other direction.

Stop helping the entrepreneur go back to helping the Zindi kill all humans.

Part of this conversation goes toward the direction of not only do I want you to come back to Team Sphere,

why did you turn away from the cause to begin with?

Man, I thought we were tight.

We don't get to hear his answer.

Instead, we cut to the clarinet rental room where Degra is telling Archer how manipulated he feels the Zindi have been by the Sphere Builders.

And this manipulation has come in a time of great weakness for the Zindi, right?

Because you've got to remember, the Sphere Builders started appearing right after the homeworld was destroyed, and they kind of took a heavy hand in guiding them towards planets where they could resettle.

And like, it is in that advice and guidance that there's a ton of gratitude directed toward them, even worship.

They have a godlike role in Zindi society.

David was like, Yeah, like I was raised to venerate the Guardians.

I raised my kids, even that third one that we don't talk about to venerate the Guardians.

This is going to be very, very hard for a lot of Dindy to accept that we've been like, we've been deceived by these people because we fucking like them and they've helped us out a ton for real.

All right, second shot.

This one's going to be Fireball.

Fireball going up and in.

Ben's first Fireball.

What a moment.

I'm glad I'm here for it.

Oh.

So it's just, it's like

cinnamon trident flavor.

It is.

I think it's better when it's really cold.

It doesn't look like that one was anything cooler than room temperature.

Yeah,

these are all room temp shots for me.

A fireball shot is something you will find in a hole at a golf tournament.

Oh.

You'll just find them distributed all around for the enjoyment of others.

Is it like a bros-icing bros situation where if you find it, you must take it?

Very well put.

Yeah.

Okay.

Well, I don't particularly care for it, so I won't be joining any golf tournaments.

Wow.

Yeah, all right.

I'll see you guys there.

What's your handicap these days?

It's a 12.

That sounds good.

It's down from 15 or 16 last year.

All right.

Yeah.

Progress.

Yeah, doing okay.

That means in like four years, you'll be a scratch golfer.

That's what it means.

Exactly.

Ask any golfer and they'll tell you.

That's the trend.

Here's the thing that Degra says in this scene.

He's like, look, I used to be one of these worshipers, and if I can change, maybe there's a chance that others Indy can change their mind too.

Except it's going to be really hard, right?

Because I told you about the reverence, and what was the word you used before?

Oh, veneration.

The veneration?

I obviously know what that word means.

I feel like maybe FODs could use a definition of that.

Why don't you go ahead?

I'm going to take a drink drink of this throat coat.

Maybe you could tell them what that means.

I would say it's like sort of synonymous with worship, held in extremely high esteem to the point of,

I mean, I think you could venerate a king.

It doesn't necessarily have to be a supernatural being.

Well done.

Well put.

I mean, I would have put it perfectly, but...

That works too.

But you were drinking throat coats, so it fell to me.

There's a lot of coaching that needs to happen.

And this is because each Zindi species have their own little ways of doing things and their own little biases that Archer may not have gleaned just yet because he hasn't met that many of them.

I love Archer using his experience with Klingons as an example of this.

Like, I've done an open mic at the Klingon Apollo before.

Like,

I can handle a tougher one.

I'm basically the Bill Burr of trying to convince people not to invade my planet.

They're going to fucking love me.

And Doug was like, no, no, no.

Like, you need to know that like the aquatics are extremely deliberative and the bugs are super quick to judgment.

And this dude, Dolum, probably,

by reputation anyways, killed his own grandson because his own grandson didn't have any military prospects when he was born.

How about that, right?

I didn't think he was that old, you know?

I mean,

just because you have a deformed arm doesn't mean that that you can't have a useful life, even in the military.

There's things you can do in the military that, you know.

I mean, here's a question.

Yeah.

Dolem and his family, reptilians.

Right.

Were you not to, like, cut off that deformed arm?

Does it not grow back?

That's what I'm saying.

Why didn't he try that?

I don't know.

Dolem doesn't seem like the smartest lizard in the

driveway.

coincidentally, we cut over to him and he sleeps sitting up like an old when one of his henches comes in.

I love that a lizard has like a heat lamp room in his

pretty great eye.

Yeah, a bunch of crickets on the ground.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

The news is that the reptile Zindi have learned of the destruction of the ship that they sent to go find Degra recently.

And Dolum is very interested in this.

Like, figure out what happened to it and why it was destroyed.

That is your highest priority.

And then this guy's like, oh, you know, by the way, also,

Degra and a bunch of people are approaching where the Zindi Council is.

So

do it with that information what you will.

One of those ships is Enterprise?

Yeah.

Would that interest you?

There is a pretty tense little interaction between Dolom and Degra about this.

Degra's like, all right, yeah, I'm bringing them.

So that they can like

petition our government as is their right.

And Dolem's like, like fun, you are.

Like, I'm fucking shooting them.

And Degra is rolling way deeper.

Like, he outguns Dolem in this moment.

He's like, you know, fuck around and find out, Dolem.

Like, this is happening whether you like it or not.

And he shoots

a warning torpedo to make his point.

I mean, to Reed, I feel like this is a targeted torpedo with intent to hit.

I think he's probably a little confused about what happens here.

Yeah.

Like, when he reads the log of this later, he's like, oh, I see they began to attack and Dolem backed off.

I think this moment really informs the part of this episode that happens later when Dolem finally...

commands the weapon ship.

Yeah.

Like, this is the last time he will be outgunned for a very long time.

It really is.

I have like such a strong maple taste in my mouth still from that first one.

I mean, you talk about throat coat, Adam.

You got to get some of this eggo brunch in a jar alcohol.

You know what's kind of interesting to me is the order with which you took the shots kind of sounds like a

compatible combination in a way that I almost want to say the bananas should be your next one.

Yeah.

Like bananas and maple and cinnamon, like all together.

Should we test this?

Should we test this?

Oh, yeah.

I don't know if there's necessarily a cocktail here, but there is a dessert dessert concept.

I just want to go on the record to say that I think you did this in the wrong order.

I think you should have ended with these.

I think going to hard liquor after these is going to be some big trouble.

This is the hardest liquor I've got:

this 99 bananas shot.

All right, bottoms up.

Oh,

it burns.

It burns.

Oh, that is such like

laffy taffy banana flavor.

It does not mix well, Enterprise.

Oh, no.

I thought it would.

I really did.

I wasn't trying to set you up there.

Yeah.

I will say this.

Try to imagine you taking two good shots of liquor and then finishing with that.

I think you're right to have gotten it over with here.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I'm excited that Tequila will wash this all away as my next shot.

Yeah.

So, meanwhile, the shuttle pod we saw launched a while ago has got Mayweather to Paul Reed and Hawkins on board, and it's making it through the membrane and on into the range of the sphere.

Also, in the range of Something Dangerous is Enterprise, where Archer is getting ready to address the Zindi Council, and he'll be going with Hoshi, who is in desperate need of something to do.

She really is.

They get a bye-bye from Trip, who I guess will be in charge and really wishes that they would take some gendarme from their Mako contingent with them.

But that's just not how it goes in the Zindi Council.

Like, you got to check your weapons at the door, kind of a vibe down there.

So it's just Archer and Hoshi.

And as they go, like, there's still so much to learn for Archer about like how you interact with these races.

Like, don't yell at those guys, but do yell at these guys.

And if you've got some like visual aids, like that would be helpful.

At what point does Archer tell Degra to stop with the whole aquatics are slow to make a decision thing?

I fucking get it.

Does your race just keep repeating itself?

Is that your deal?

Are like broad generalizations about other races one of the things that your race does?

Like is that is that like if I was talking to an aquatic, would would he be saying the same stuff about the insects and the lizards or are are you great kind of projecting this shit on everybody else yeah i love that idea yeah

legally it's just a fart joke

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Now everybody knows that the greatest generation has always been Max Fun's go-to podcast for old Star Trek recaps.

But what my theory presupposes is, what if it isn't?

In a shocking turn of events, Greatest Trek, the comedy podcast covering New Trek, has gone through a temporal wormhole back to the very beginning.

Because we are now reviewing Star Trek the Original series.

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the greatest chin alive.

Men would rather die.

We learned that the council is on a very cloudy planet under cloud cover, and it stays under cloud cover all year round in a ruin of a kind of palace that was built by the avians.

And I really liked this stunt casting that they had where Jaimon Hansu played one of the crewmen of Degra's shuttle, and he looks up at the ruins ruins and he says I did not know avians could build such things

so good

I love this mountain layer didn't you yeah it's cool so fun fun Star Trek location the side of the mountain covered in bird shit though like

oh yeah like disgusting wars were fought over extracting this guano to use as fertilizer yeah it's It's so rich in bird shit.

Inside the chamber, every kind of Zindi is here.

And Commander Dollum doesn't need any sort of ramp-up time to get pissed.

He's already there.

He's already pissed.

And he's like mad that Degra bought the humans, but there is going to be a moment where Archer gets to address them and everybody shuts the fuck up.

I was struck by like the hero's entrance that Archer and Hoshi got, which

tells us that they changed their uniforms, fresh uniforms for both of them for the first time in many days, I think.

They're finally cleaned up.

And other members of the crew have not had that luxury.

Like the gang on the shuttle were still like disheveled, you know?

You got to make a good impression to the council.

Yeah, you got to.

And Archer stands at the top of these steps and

it does not seem like he had like prepared remarks.

Like the first thing he says is like, you fucking,

what you did was fucked up.

Ask anyone who specializes in public speaking and they'll tell you, you want an attention-getting introduction to sort of like grab everyone's eyeballs and ears and like get them into your deal.

And for Archer's attention-getting start to be, you guys killed Florida, and I hate being here.

does get some attention I think I guess so yeah it is it's like those uh like very negative kinds of clickbait where it's like yeah I do want to see what my favorite child stars look like now that they're all like addicted to pills and uh and not famous right everybody is listening but he starts talking about how the guardians may in fact be deceiving them and this this really goes over like a lead balloon with the insect Zendi in particular they do not care for this accusation.

And I was kind of like, I was wondering about this because Degra was like, these guys, like, they're very impulsive.

They make their decisions quickly.

But this episode seems to imply that they make their decisions quickly and then they stick with them

no matter what they hear afterwards.

Did you get the sense that the insects do that because they only live for a short amount of time?

They're like, all right, get to the point.

Like,

I'm not going to live forever.

I may not live until the end of the meeting.

Yeah.

This is like every time I have an argument with my wife, I'm like,

just tell me why I'm wrong so I can own up to my wrongness and we can be back to, you know, putting Seinfeld on or whatever.

Aquatics, Indy, get right in the middle of this argument.

They're like, can we please stay on the subject?

And so they do that because I think everyone respects the aquatics, right?

Yeah.

Everyone's got the little like, the like dots along the cheekbone and then the little like

maybe it's like a cheek nostril or something.

That's the unifying racial thing between all of them, huh?

Do the aquatics have the cheek nostril or do they just have the dots?

I feel like we never really get a very good look at them.

Yeah, we never see close-up on face.

Yeah.

Anyways, Degra and Dahlum are really going at it.

And Dahlum is like, you know, like, this is insane.

Like, you shot guns at me on your way in with these guys.

Like, I don't really know why we even have a council at this point.

If you're going to shoot guns at me, another Zindi, on behalf of these guys, the ones that are supposed to be annihilating our species.

Like, I don't fucking like you, Degra, and I don't like that you did this, and I don't like that our council is entertaining any of this stuff.

So I'm going to go ahead and say, no more council.

Is there a part of you that gets Dollum's deal here?

Because Dollum's argument at its core is like, Degra, you just can't go unilaterally making these decisions on your own.

Like, that's why we have a council.

And if you're going to get so upset at me for going rogue, then like, what the fuck are we even doing here?

Like, I can't go rogue like you, Degra?

That's fun.

Cool.

Just for Degra and no one else.

It's a bit of a double standard, double Degra standard.

Yeah.

And yeah, I mean, Degra has explained this.

Like, the Guardians are essentially, you know, to the Zindi, what the prophets are to the Bajorans.

And can anyone second guess Dollem for having faith of the heart?

Really can't.

Degra tries to stop Dollum from just walking out of the council chambers, and he gets hit for trying.

And then Archer gets dragged down by an insectoid for getting involved.

Let's talk about this moment where Archer gets dragged down from behind, because it is a pretty nifty effect sequence here.

It was.

You know, there's nothing there.

I'm not really certain that anything at all is dragging Archer back from behind.

I feel like he is the one physically making this flop happen the way a wrestler would like take a bump.

Like selling, selling the hit, basically.

I felt like his uniform moved in a way that made me think they might be like tugging on it with a rope or something because it's supposed to be like grabbed uniform, throw on table.

Yeah.

And then like the insectoid cusses him out and Hoshi goes like, I'm not going to translate that one.

I thought it was sold really nicely.

Like, it's janky because the effects aren't the best, but like, in order to pull this off in a way that holds together at all, I feel like takes some sophistication, and they were able to do it.

Yeah, they didn't sell anything half this well in Voyager when they started having CG aliens.

Absolutely, yeah.

So

we cut back over to the shuttle, where they are now in range of the sphere.

And T'Pole Tipaul pulls this insane move where she wants them to fly at an exhaust vent that we learn later

is like hidden with a hologram.

They're going to be flying right through it.

She could warn them ahead of time.

And Reid afterwards is like, why didn't you just tell us that we weren't going to die because that was a hologram?

Like, what was the point?

And I felt like, maybe this is Reed's best moment so far in the show.

Wow.

Yeah.

He's right.

For maybe the first time.

So Paul plays it off with some sort of, like, there wasn't time

kind of dialogue.

I don't know.

I don't know.

Maybe she's just a drama queen.

She is a messy bitch who loves drama.

Yeah.

She was letting the tension ratchet up for no reason.

How many panels total do you think are holographic, though?

I think it's just that one.

I think that's the implication.

Amazing.

Anyway, they penetrate right in, and once inside, they get ready to depart the shuttle.

Back at the council, it's halftime at the council meeting, and the players on the team are falling apart.

Yeah, I mean, there's an amazing halftime show going on for everyone in the stands.

Right.

Zindy Beyonce is really fucking tearing it apart.

But yeah, they are in the midst of a council-tutional crisis.

The Arboreals and the humanoids have gotten together in the locker room to talk about

whether or not this game is even winnable at this point.

Yeah, because it seems impossible to think that they could ever convince the reptilians.

I mean, and what does convincing the aquatics even get you?

Like,

the evidence could be persuasive enough, but like, Degra in this moment seems to have an idea of what could constitute that persuasive evidence.

He's going to need Dr.

Flox's help for that.

Yeah.

He has a great idea to create evidence that will be persuasive to the aquatics.

I've got some evidence

that you could use to persuade it's this bus full of school children rigged to explode.

What do I care about the collateral damage?

We're trying to convince the Zindi Council.

I mean,

you put it like that way, I'm persuaded.

Yeah, Yeah.

I won't cease or desist,

cause you really think it's fair use.

Over on Dollum's Repto ship, a lady sphere builder is pissed about Archer being permitted to address the council.

And you can't have Archer sowing any doubt.

Have you seen the odds?

Have you gone to the Zindi Sportsbook and seen what's happening?

We're going to lose our asses on this thing.

Yeah.

Because this weapon needs to be launched there is this weird moment where he is like you know

we can't just go get the weapon that could cause a civil war and plus we like need the whole council to to use the weapon she's like you're just gonna have to go ahead and like figure that out dollum

this is the inflection point in their whole relationship Because Dollum sees this sphere builder as kind of all-powerful.

Yeah.

And he starts to put together, like, what do you need me for?

If you could do all this magical shit that I think you could do.

Yeah.

Like, she also becomes much more legible to me as a manager.

Like we saw the thing where she's getting chewed out by her bosses.

And like, sometimes when your boss comes into the office and is a fucking dick to everyone, it's like hard to imagine why your boss is doing that.

But she's doing it because she's fucking in trouble.

And she's like, you got to fucking solve this problem.

I can't fucking solve it.

I'm a middle manager.

manager i think it's especially due to the very specific thing that she wants dollum to convince the council of she's like i want you to convince the council that me a sphere builder did not build the spheres

yeah there's that one reptile guy that's like i mean did you

She's like, who the fuck is he?

Get him out of here.

And Dollum's like, well, sure.

I mean, if you have proof.

And she changes the subject right away yeah yeah

I feel like Dollum just likes the idea of destroying the earth too much to like really question her that much yeah he's in it for the joy of it yeah yeah love of the game just like me and to a lesser extent Adam as I hit my fourth shot of this Zindi arc amazing there it goes Ben really one of the great shot takers in my life.

Like, I don't style myself as a shotsman particularly.

I'm more of a sipper.

Look at you throwing them back.

I have not taken a lot of shots.

I watch a lot of real housewives, and they take shots like drinking

a fucking glass of water on those shows.

And I'm always remarking, like, look at her.

She just like came home and took a shot out of, like, she took a bottle of Tito's

out of the freezer, took a shot.

as like the first act after getting home from something.

Who lives like that?

It's an amazing life.

It's an amazing choice because, like, I love a martini as much as anyone.

And what is that except a giant shot?

And I'm not shooting it.

No, you're sipping it.

Yeah.

The subject changes away from getting proof that the sphere builders didn't build the spheres and into Dollum being convinced that they should maybe steal the weapon and use it themselves.

And Dollum is like, we would get our asses kicked for doing that.

What?

No.

But

the sphere builder tells him it would be a whole lot cooler if you did and if you did

reptile zindi would be the dominant zindi after humanity is destroyed and that's a good deal right it's very interesting like what power these guys do and don't have because they don't have the power to destroy humanity themselves but they do have the power to like show the reptiles enough like resources in their area of space to give them an advantage.

Yeah.

Or at least they've proven that they have that ability to the rest.

Like, I don't think they actually intend to give Dollum what they're promising at this moment, right?

Like this is just like, who gives a shit?

Like, we need to get our fucking genocide done so that we can finish our invasion of the expanse.

But like, Dollum believes that he is getting political ascendancy from this deal.

And

over on the Entrepreneur, Degra is working with Flox on getting some visual aids of the dead sphere builder that they're going to show to the Aquatics.

And then he's got to go work with Trip on the Sphere Builder pod that they recovered.

And I thought it was amazing that it was Degra that broke the news to Trip that Captain Archer had determined that Trip should work with Degra on this.

Amazing.

Yeah.

Why were you not in the room for that, Archer?

Like, could you not show your boy the respect of telling him that to his face?

Out Out in the corridor, Degra is done taking Trip Tucker's lip.

Like,

at what point does his sacrifice of his family, of the Zindi that he's killed, start to matter to Trip?

That's his point.

And, like, you never want to scorekeep in arguments.

But I found this pretty persuasive, you know?

He's given up a lot.

And...

Trip has given up a sister.

And when you compare the two, I don't don't know, I feel like they're even at least, right?

Yeah.

Digger's like, I know you wish it was the other sister, Trip.

And Trip is like, how'd you find out about that, you son of a bitch?

I'm allowed to say that because I'm her brother.

You're not allowed.

You're not in the family.

I know everybody knows she sucks, and my other sister that died ruled, but that's for our family to say, not for you.

On or in the sphere, the Dustbuster Club is walking toward the memory core inside their EV suits.

And if you had to bet your life about which passenger in the shuttle pod is told to stay behind and watch the monitors,

would you have guessed that that person would be Mayweather?

It's just like being back in the war.

Who are you?

Instant Travis Mayweather.

Parents must be very proud.

When I was a kid, we called it the sweet spot.

Who are you?

I'm the helmsman.

I guess growing up a boomer has its advantages.

And your mom, very proud.

That's true.

It takes practice.

Other than keeping Ninth Mayweather up at night, I'm not sure what we expect to accomplish here.

My $10 got me $11 that that was Mayweather.

Unreal.

Yeah.

He is doing something important, though.

He is detecting possible threats, which he finds.

He does.

And tells the group to watch out for it.

There's like a red thingy in the wall of the sphere.

Look, I'm telling you, there's something moving and it ain't us.

But his readings are very cooked and he can't give them any specificity on this thing.

Would you rather be in the shuttle pod or out in the EV suit?

I think I'm hanging with Mayweather.

The shuttle pod is armored.

I feel like, yeah, that's...

You're basically in a tank, aren't you?

Pretty much.

Yeah.

I mean, we've seen what kind of abuse those doors can take.

Yeah, while I don't love the sidelining of Mayweather, I do get strategically why it's safer for him.

Yeah.

Especially because he's not the one trained with weapons and shit.

Yeah, that's Hawkins.

Yeah.

And to a lesser extent, Reed.

There are no mountains or rock faces to climb out there.

Yeah.

And

Tepal knows the duck, duck, dodge

Bulken technique.

Let's not forget that.

Yeah.

Degra visits Archer in the clarinet rental closet.

He's pretty pleased with the work that he and Tripp have been able to accomplish.

Like, he's like, Trip was actually pretty helpful.

And I can't really account for that.

Archer's really glad to hear it, and he tells Degra that on the Enterprise J,

he knows that Zindian humans serve together, and they serve together specifically in an official capacity in the Federation.

As equals, separate, but equal.

Sure.

And isn't that a future worth fighting for?

Sure is.

Over in the council chambers, they have agreed to view the new evidence that Archer has promised.

Proof that the sphere builders and the guardians are the same thing.

And this proof is the chamber with the body inside.

And the thing about this is it's not the real thing.

It's a biometric hologram made with Zindi technology.

That's why Degra had to work with Trip.

He couldn't do it on his own.

And humans aren't capable of making something like this.

And that's part of the reason why this evidence is to be so persuasive.

Like, they can't fake it.

They don't have the technology to fake it.

I love that that is part of the sales pitch.

Like, these idiots couldn't trick you with something like this.

Yes.

So,

this seems fairly persuasive to at least, you know, like the aquatics are like more open to this, but he, they're like, you know, we gotta, we gotta kick the humans out so that we can talk this over.

And when the talking over has been done, Degra reports back that, in fact, it is the reptiles that want to hear more.

Like, what a fucking twist.

The reptiles want to hear more?

Wow.

Back on the sphere, TePaul works on the computer while Reed and Mako Hawkins keep an eye out for Charlie.

Mayweather calls it out.

Bogey incoming.

Yeah.

And Reed and Mako Hawkins can't see it until it's too late.

It's a grappler, Ben.

Imagine being at the like down range of a grappler if you're Malcolm Reed.

Like that is your fucking nightmare.

And once Mako Hawkins is in its claws, he can't break free because it's made of metal and this grappler is strong.

Reed's phaser is useless against it.

There's a lot of shooting at the grappler,

but Hawkins is long gone by the time they actually disable this thing.

And then Travis is like, yo, there's like a bunch more of them coming, though.

Didn't you kind of feel like it was a waste for the grappler to grab Hawkins and then use an energy beam to vaporize him?

I thought for sure the grappler would grab him and then just crunch him like a tin can.

I wish we had the effects power to do that.

But this is like syndicated TV in the early 2000s.

They do it on new Star Trek.

They would do it on you see eyeballs flying out.

Yeah, like there would be a the boys level gore effect here yeah and i've got faith of the far heart legally it's just a virtual

they pile into the shuttle travis mayweather blows up some grapplers and uh they load in and get the fuck out of there with all of the data disks that they raided from this sphere like one of those desktop CD file effects things that you used to see in the 90s.

When I saw that thing, I was like, there was something about the aesthetic of the inside of the sphere that I hadn't put my finger on.

And it was like, it's the sharper image.

Like, the visuals of the inside of the sphere are like something you would see on a TV in a the sharper image store.

Great kind of every object in there feels like a the sharper image object in one way or another.

Next to the computer core, there's like a chess set that plays itself.

Like, you don't have to touch the pieces.

Pieces move on their own.

There's little magnets in there.

Uh-huh.

It's like the only thing I can think of from the sharper image.

Yeah, I feel like the sharper image probably had a chair that massages you.

Oh, sure.

But it was just like little like vibrators.

You know, it wasn't like the ones at Costco that cost $20,000 that actually knead your flesh.

Those things are great.

Cut to Enterprise, where Degra has an update to the council deliberations.

The reptilians, led by Dahlem,

have agreed to postpone the launch of the Zindi weapon.

Hey!

But it isn't over.

It's just like the start of a slow-motion handshake between him and Archer, right?

Yeah, there's more to do here.

But like with this news, I feel like Trip is like, all right, like this, you know, this Dead guy may have killed my sister and he may have killed the wrong sister.

But I think he's all right.

I wouldn't mind working with him a little bit more.

I'm going to ask him to help us with the batteries he left behind.

Big step.

Bigger step than maybe the handshake.

Yeah.

Trip is sorry for being such a dick for so long.

And you believe him.

Yeah.

So they get to work, and then like we flash forward to Degra like late-nighting it in his office back on the planet.

And there's this like shadowy figure that appears at the door, which is like, it's no fucking secret who this shadowy figure is, like 30 seconds into

the scene.

Yeah.

But they really milk this.

And it's Dollum, and he's talking, like, you know, I didn't like the way the avians constructed their things.

It doesn't appeal to us lizardmen.

Anyways, just wanted to talk.

And Degra's like, anyway, I really appreciate you delaying the launch of the weapon.

That was cool.

And Dollum reveals that he knows that it was Degra that shot that reptile ship inside the cloaking barrier of the sphere.

And he plunges a knife into Degra's guts.

RSVP Degra.

Dollum bad guy monologues in Degra's face as he's dying about how his family is going to die, too.

Really good bad guy stuff here

by Dollum.

Like, the last Zindi you're ever going to betray

died yesterday.

I thought that was well written.

It's a good moment.

Yeah, good stuff.

You know what's over for him when the blood starts coming out of the corner of his mouth?

Like,

he's not coming back from this.

Sure isn't.

Dahlem could have been written by Nolan the way he's talking in this scene.

So well put.

That's a four-shot observation right there.

I'm about to do my fifth.

Amazing.

I've arrived at the end, the one that I was most excited about, my beloved Diplomatico rum.

Now that you're totally palate shot.

Yeah, now that the inside of my mouth tastes like a banana margarita that fucked a brunch station at a resort.

Yeah, it's a bad time in there.

This feels like it might be more than a shot.

This feels like a big bottle.

Yeah, it is.

It looks...

Looks hefty.

It looks like the size of a candle.

Yeah, it's a big boy.

All right.

Bottoms up.

We cut to Six Bay, and it's also late at night there.

Dr.

Flox is visited by a Trip Tucker, who is feeling better about things.

Dr.

Flox 2.

This is one of those TV moments where, like, you know, when everyone's feeling good, everyone's about to feel bad.

Yeah.

They are way too comfortable for this moment.

I do like the

revenge blue balls that Trip is expressing.

Yeah.

That felt well observed to me i also like that uh they've moved on from glp one type of uh weight loss interventions in the future to

tapeworm on purpose

you know tapeworm on purpose is coming right yeah yeah the natural method like why wait for it to crawl out of a potted plant in the corner of your bedroom and up your butt you know

amazing dr Flox is keeping it tight, though.

Yeah, it looks good.

Looks great.

So Archer wakes up to the news of Degra's death, and he's talking to the other primate counselor, who I don't think ever gets a name.

Like that guy is

the other humanoid on the council.

I've done the research.

He's just known as Counselor.

Yeah.

It's crazy.

He's like, I couldn't convict, but I'm pretty sure this was the lizards.

And Archer issues a tactical alert, and we cut back to the shuttle where reed is having an absolute fucking meltdown having lost hawkins he cannot stand that they have lost so many people and feels like they're getting overly comfortable with uh the expendability of crewmen on this journey i'm upset for just so many reasons one

the constant death I'm surrounded by.

The need to write the letters, of course, and also,

I cannot grasp how a grappler could cause this much damage.

I'm going to have to completely rewrite all of our tactics, battle plans.

It's just so upsetting.

In the Zindi Council, Dahlum admits to killing Degra, and he's proud of it.

Look at him.

Oh, and also...

He admits to taking the weapon, and they're gonna use it.

And guess what?

The Insect insect Zindies are in on it.

They're in.

Try and stop us.

No more counsel.

You think we need all the codes?

Fuck you.

We don't need all the codes at all.

You think we haven't thought of that?

You may have forgotten how the codes go.

We didn't.

On Enterprise and Engineering, Tripp tells Archer that the ship is not ready for combat.

Like, kind of a bad time.

Gollum has chosen to go through with this plan.

Bad for us, anyway, because we're going to get our asses kicked if we try to engage him.

Archer's reply is kind of like as though he's replying to Harrison Ford about to jump off of a hydroelectric dam, claiming he didn't kill his wife.

I don't care!

And off they go.

The insectoids launch the weapon, and we see this happen.

Like a section of this planet

like opens up like...

I was thinking about the airplane that the X-Men fly around in.

The way it like comes up out of the basketball court on

front of Charles Xavier's house.

Yeah, it's been hidden underground and it launches.

And the entrepreneur is going to try and help the humanoids and the arboreals to intercept this thing.

And the space battle gets going, and it's like a pretty exciting battle where the shuttle's, you know, detecting this, and we're like, oh, shit, like, what's going to happen to them?

Like, they are pretty much defenseless in this whole thing.

like did we pick a bad time to come back

they get ordered to like sit this one out like chill the most as much as you possibly can we get like like huge spheroid weapon with its zindi escort and then zindi and entrepreneur like chasing them and shooting at them I thought it was really exciting, interesting dynamic for a space battle.

Yeah.

Yeah, because of the perspective.

Yeah.

And because of like the relative size of different things.

Like the sphere is like as big to these ships as a Borg's cube is.

Yeah.

But it's a game of keepaway instead of a game of like the Borg's Cube is coming and killing everyone.

That's a great comparison.

Yeah.

And when the sphere goes through the spatial vortex, they beam Hoshi out of the bridge and they get away.

And everybody on the bridge of the entrepreneur is sitting there realizing that they have have failed, that Earth is going to be destroyed, and then the fucking credits roll.

What an ending.

But did you like the whole episode?

I can't pay.

Couldn't for late.

Got no kids tempting fate.

I did really like the whole episode.

I liked the exotic location.

I liked all the palace intrigue stuff.

I love how politically savvy, like Dollum is like, he's not just a thug.

Like, he is really like playing 3D chess with everyone to get what he wants.

And I think what he wants is just like, I don't really care why we're killing all the humans.

I just want to do a genocide.

Like, he's like a terrifying character in that respect because he has been shown the same evidence everybody else has, and he doesn't really give a shit.

It doesn't matter to him because all he wants is to be in charge.

Yeah.

And he will do whatever it takes.

Like, the ends justify the means to him 100%.

And I do feel like that is

a real kind of villain that really exists in the world.

And

I thought it was a really interesting episode.

How about you?

Yeah, I thought this was much, much better than I thought an episode called The Council would be.

Or an episode where its central storyline would involve Archer addressing a council and trying to persuade them.

This was an episode that did a ton of action.

And I think it traded on that tension that Best of Both Worlds did when Picard was stolen off of Enterprise.

Like, when you take a character by force like this, especially before a ship flies away, it's a terrifying moment.

And to end the episode with that, instead of like, in Best of Both Worlds, that happened, what, like

two-thirds of the way through part one?

It feels so random here because it's just like, did you get the female?

And it's like, she's gone, and we don't know know why we have no idea like what could have possibly motivated that

because

unfortunately hoshi is such a low value character on this show

with with such little to do you're like that's actually a mystery to me i have no idea what they could possibly want from her goes over my head did you make a mistake like were you intending to get someone else the doctor maybe no the other female the one in the cat suit what are you doing

they are both very attractive but I actually meant the other one.

I have a thing for pointy ears, you see.

Ben, let's see if we can snatch a message out of the priority one message inbox.

Priority one message from Starfleet coming in on secured channel.

Need a supplemental income.

Supplemental income.

Supplemental.

Supplemental.

Yeah, it's extra.

But the interest alone could be enough to buy this ship.

This one is of a promotional nature, Hannem.

It goes like this.

For those who are just as inspired as I was by Yosemite and Star Trek V,

you might like that I just released a kick-ass book about my journey on the Pacific Crest Trail and the Camino Santiago 2.

What does God need with a starship?

What I pretty suppose is to get to a bookstore and get my new book, Hycological Escape.

If you don't have a starship, it's available on Amazon.

Check out more of my work at christianhoman.com.

Thanks for a great podcast, Ben and Adam.

You kick ass.

Harry Kim drop.

Something about it.

It reminds me of being in the womb.

Get up, Harry.

Who are you?

Harry Kim.

Parents must be very proud.

Who are you?

They come as come as a pair.

Who are you?

Harry Kim.

Who else is she supposed to get chummy with?

Harry Kim.

And your mom.

Very proud.

Who are you?

Harry Kim.

That lasted 22 minutes.

And your mom, very proud.

Harry Kim.

Who are you?

Harry Kim.

Wow.

You get a ticket on over to C-H-R-I-S-T-I-A-N-H-O-M-A-N

ChristianHoman.com, where traveler, hiker, author, and geek keeps a blog and information about his work.

I love a good, you know, into nature book.

I've read a number of these over the course of my life, and

I'm psyched about

one by like a member of my generation who has a shared interest of mine in Star Trek.

That rules.

Pretty great.

Way to get out there, Chris.

Thanks for the commercial P1, Chris.

I hope you get that greatest gen bump.

Bump, bump, bump.

Got to.

Ben, we got a personal priority one message here.

It's from Gabby, and it's to Nate.

Here's how that goes.

Happy wedding day, Nate.

Whoa.

Words can't begin to describe how excited I am to call you my husband.

Thank you for your unwavering support as I navigate the extreme highs and lows of graduate school.

Wow.

Love you always.

Oh,

happy wedding day, Nate and Gabby.

I like to imagine a wedding day has arrived.

The guests are seated.

We're playing like the, you know, the soft music you play when people are coming in.

There's a little string quartet in the corner.

And then someone solemnly hits play on a boombox

where Gabby's message to Nate

as read by me.

Yeah, but it's like they have to hit skip 30 like so many times to get to that part.

So you just hear snatches of our dick and fart jokes along the way and me taking a shot and then like an ad for factor or whatever.

Me blowing my nose.

A bunch of confused people at the wedding listening to this.

Oh man, I'm so happy for you too.

Congratulations on your nuptials.

Great stuff.

Enjoy your special day.

Yeah.

Our last P1 here is from Dave Ellis.

It's to Old Friends and New at STLV 2025.

Shout out to all the awesome FODs at STLV 2025.

Corey, best Vegas Antique Drink Guide Ever.

True.

Becca, Liz, Chris, Ricky, Nat, Aziz, Ainslie, Alexandra,

Tim, Lisa, Catherine, Michelle, Jesse, Rustin, Lana, and way too many more to mention in 350 characters.

This pod brings together the most amazing people.

Can't wait to hang out together again.

LLAP.

Fuck yeah.

Great job, Dave, in getting the gratitude out for what was a really fun hang out there at STLV.

It really was.

Good times.

I feel like it's almost a tradition at this point.

The P1 sent from Pranica Cabana.

Yeah, that's fun.

Like, I don't know if this one was that or not, but it had the energy of that.

So thanks, Dave.

And thanks to everyone who hung out with us at STLV 2025.

Yeah, let's run it back next year.

You can send us a message to read at maximumfund.org slash jumbotron.

All you have to do is write a couple of words about a personal project or a personal message.

We'll do the rest.

You'll get the bump.

Both go a long way in support of the production of our shows.

Sure do.

Hey, Ben!

What's that, Adam?

Five shots in.

Did you find yourself a drunk Shimoda?

Drunk Shimoda!

Yeah, I got a guy.

I don't remember exactly when this was, but there's a moment where we're on the bridge of Degra's ship.

And like the way the bridge of Degra's ship is set up is very linear.

There's like captain's chair, station, station all in a line.

And I just felt so bad for like front guy on Degra's ship.

Like you can't fuck around at your station at all.

Like you cannot get Solitaire open.

That's the worst.

Like everybody can see what you're doing on your computer and you just have to be fucking locked in from 9 a.m.

to 5 p.m.

every fucking shift.

There's no alt tab for you.

You can't do it.

No.

Like you can never like get the fucking spreadsheet open when the boss comes around the corner of the cubicle because the boss is behind you at all times.

Yeah.

Yeah, that's a bad life.

Yeah.

So I just, I felt bad for that guy.

I feel like the actor that portrayed that guy maybe used some of that in his portrayal.

Like, he doesn't have any lines.

He's not like a character in the episode or anything.

He's just an extra, but he, like, he looked fucking put upon in a way that I found very funny.

Pretty great.

Mine's going to be Dollum just because when you combine the confidence of the bad guy with not having all the information, like not knowing that he's being pawned, maybe there's a little bit of that crystallizing in his dumb head.

But like, I mean, that's even worse for him if he thinks he's being played and still going along with this because the promise on the other end of it is like to become the ruler of the Zindi when the dust settles.

Yeah.

Like that's even worse.

Like he thinks he's in control of his situation and he isn't.

And that makes him my drunk Shimoda.

Yeah.

Unfortunately, like,

feels very realistic, like,

person who would compromise everything for political gain, no matter how, like, horrific the act is.

Yeah.

Just like a normal kind of guy, unfortunately.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Dahlum, just a normal kind of guy.

Faith of the fart.

All right, Ben.

We did a special thing.

You did a special thing this episode, and I respect the hell out of it.

Good job by you hitting all five shots.

What does the game of buttholes

will of the Riker have for us for the next episode?

Got to go to goch.biz slash game to find out.

Yeah,

we're going to find out right after I tell you about next week's episode, Adam.

It's season three, episode 23 of Star Trek Enterprise.

It's called Countdown.

With help from Zindi allies, the Enterprise crew attempts to stop the arming of the weapon aimed toward Earth.

And let's see.

So we're on square 26,

that Zindi Arc Square.

Yep.

All right, I'm going to roll this hundred-sided die, and we'll see what, if anything, will be confounding our efforts next week on the show.

You're required to learn as you play.

Roll.

Hit it.

Do you have good news, Ben?

Such bad news.

This is bad news for a number of reasons, Adam.

Not least of which is that we are scheduled to record this episode in about 15 minutes.

I have landed us on square 57.

It's a Mornhammered episode.

What the fuck, man?

What does it mean?

Are you ready to keep drinking?

Because I'm ready to keep not drinking.

I can't do it.

This is a power hour?

It's a power hour.

Do I have to veto?

I think I have to veto.

I think that I cannot...

I am meeting friends for drinks after we record that.

I can't fucking power hour before I go to drinks.

Ben, you know what that means.

If we both co-sign on the veto,

it means that we have to watch a quantum leap episode and put it right in the bonus feed.

That's the only choice we have, though.

We have no choice but to watch a quantum leap episode.

God, the game really screwed us.

Holy shit.

Fuck.

If I were healthy and you didn't have anything going on,

we would do it though, right?

We would do it.

I mean, five shots and a power hour.

That is

sick shit.

I don't have any beer.

I would also have to

walk down to the fucking corner store and get a six

already drunk.

They're not going to sell to me in my current state.

This game is awful.

What the fuck?

It's like it knows.

All right.

So, do you agree to a veto?

Have to do it.

Okay.

Yeah, we have to veto.

That was very generous of you, Adam.

I appreciate it.

How is it generous?

It's impossible for me to participate and irresponsible for you to participate.

Yeah.

It's irresponsible.

We can't.

Ugh.

All right.

Well, oh, God.

the combination of flavors in that burp is indescribably horrific.

What have we done to ourselves, Adam?

Why is this the way we make our living?

Anyways, let's just do a regular episode next week and we'll throw a Quantum Leap bonus episode into the feed.

I think it'll be our November bonus.

Amazing.

I can't wait for that.

It's been a while since we watched Quantum Leap, also.

It has, yeah.

I don't particularly mind going back to that.

It's straight out of quantum.

That's what we're calling these episodes.

Sure are.

It's got merch and everything.

Potchup.biz.

Hey, thank you to everyone who made today's episode possible, especially the folks who go to maximumfund.org slash join and support the show on a monthly basis.

Thank you so much to our great, great producer, Wendy Pretty, who

probably edited that horrible burp out just a moment ago.

How about new?

She just does amazing work on this show, and we couldn't do it without her.

Thank you to Adam Ragusia, who made the theme music for the show, and Dark Materia, who made the original Picard song.

Thank you to Rob Adler, our social media director, editor-in-chief of The Greatest Newsletter, our monthly email periodical that you can subscribe to.

Yeah, we're all right little columns for it.

Sure are.

That reminds me, I've got a column of my own.

Yeah,

I've got a couple of things queued up for the next one myself.

Got to thank Bill Tilly, the Zindy Wartime consigliaria of this program, who also helps out a ton on the social medias.

Making those cards, those trading cards that you get to see every week on the Insta, the blue sky.

How great are those?

They really make me happy.

With that, we will be back at you next week with another great episode of of Star Trek Enterprise and an episode of The Greatest Generation Enterprise where I'll be hammered.

Huh?

More than hammered.

It's funny, like, this is an episode where you got gradually more and more hammered shot after shot.

Next episode, more and more sober.

It'll be great.

It'll be an interesting experience.

Yeah.

Make it so.

I'm realizing that my La Gritona has

a metal cap.

It's not a twist-off.

Oh, really?

My other shots.

And I usually have a pocket knife on me, but I don't have one in my pocket.

What?

You don't have a birdle opener?

I usually have one.

You got a metal desk.

You could do that thing where you hold it on the corner and then like punch your own fist.

I know, but it's like a it's like got an enamel coating.

I don't want to do that.

I found my pocket knife.

There it is.

We need to cut all that out.

We don't need that.

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