The Lonely Island Beginnings (Repost)

Hey Crate Army, Seth here.

I wanted to let you know that we do not have a new episode for you this week.

We were all just a little too busy.

Akiva is putting the finishing touches on his Naked Gun movie, which will be in theaters on August 1st.

Yorma is on spring break.

I know it's summer, but he got the dates mixed up.

And Andy is unavailable because recently he, against all odds, has gotten super super into podcasts.

And pretty much every time we try to schedule, he is basically just in the middle of a podcast binge and refuses to join ours to record because he's just super into listening to them now.

So instead, we are going to replay our very first episode.

So for those of you who didn't start at the beginning, you can get a sense of what this podcast was when it began.

A lot less about Total Recall is my memory.

So we hope you enjoy it.

We'll be back soon with new episodes.

Righteous kill.

Hey everybody, my name is Seth Myers and it's very exciting.

This is the first episode of a new podcast that I'm doing with three very old friends of mine.

And earlier today they sent me this intro and asked me to read it word for word as they wrote it.

In 2005, three gentlemen arrived in New York City, not just to change the fortunes of Saturday Night Live, but to change the course of comedy history.

Their names, I'm not going to insult your intelligence.

You know their names.

But if you just woke up from a 17-year coma, they answer to Andy, Yarma, and Akiva, aka.

AKI?

That's how you wrote it.

AKI, the lonely island.

That's how we wrote it.

That's how we wrote it.

We don't play by anybody's rules.

Thank you for getting it typo correct.

It's the lonely island and Seth Meyer's fodest.

So I started at SNL in 2001, four very nice years at the show before you guys showed up, and you showed up with a lot of other wonderful people that we'll talk about over the course of this podcast.

But I genuinely mean this.

I'm being sincere.

The tone of the show had a major shift in the right direction and started a really delightful era of the show when you guys showed up.

I agree.

And you had a really nice thing going for you.

You showed up and you knew each other.

Can I just interject before we really get into the meat and potatoes of this?

Yeah, but can you just introduce yourself?

It's me, Andy Samberg Samberg from the Lowly Island.

Okay, great.

Seth Meyer's former castmate.

Thank you.

I just want to say before we get going, shouldn't we like celebrate a little that we're starting like a huge podcast together and like hoo-ride a little bit on the MIC?

Yeah.

Yeah.

I think that's a really good thing.

We'll add that later.

Yeah.

It's just nice to see you guys' faces.

And then for no one else to see us.

You guys don't want to be like, yeah.

Well, it's the first podcast.

Yeah.

you've had the least enthusiasm for this in all the planning and now immediately you're coming i've never wanted to do this okay i'm just saying now that we're forcing people to listen should we make it kind of fun like hey welcome to the party motherfucker yeah

and who ride yeah we got a who ride yeah all right a little bit more morning radio kind of in a man pap pap pap pap pap welcome back to four shock jocks

All right, we should note that we have not figured out the name for this podcast yet, but Yarma is pushing very hard that it should be for shock jocks i have figured it out and it's called for shock jocks tell us why you like the name yeah well andy all the other names were taken it's because this thing plays sound effects that's why what is it that you have that plays sound effects

you have it in front of you too it's called the zoom picture it's the thing that the podcast company gave us and yorm of course already figured it out me and akiva did oh man we all have access to that yeah it's annoying as fuck yeah it's a nightmare now before we got got on here, when we were tech checking, you were mentioning that this felt a lot like Spider-Man the musical and when they were in kind of previews and figuring stuff out, Seth.

And then you were going to tell me something about when you saw Spider-Man the musical before it started.

Oh, right.

People, this might already be lost to history, but in the early runs of Spider-Man Turn Off the Dark, is that what it was called?

A lot of Spider-Men were falling from the rafters and hurting themselves super bad.

And living in New York City at the time, that was pretty much all the New York Post was writing about is how many Spider-Men were falling and hurting themselves.

I wrote way too many sketches about it.

I was completely enamored with the story that people were hurting themselves, especially just people dressed like Spider-Man hurting themselves in Broadway theaters.

I wrote a sketch for Fred called Gublin in Green, where he was a lawyer who only

dealt with personal injuries that happened at Spider-Man Turn Off the Darkness.

And then...

I got an email that seemed like a joke email that it wasn't.

I got an email from Bono

inviting me to, this is not a joke, inviting me to the premiere of Spider-Man Turn Off the Joke, Turn Off the Dark that said something along the lines.

He wanted you to turn off the jokes.

Well, that's what he said.

He's like, something along the lines of like, you've had your fun, you've told your jokes, now come see the real thing.

Thinking like, once you see it, you'll understand there's nothing to joke about.

Right.

Because people are genuinely hurting themselves.

And then did you go see it?

I did.

I went to opening night.

And my memory of opening night was Spider-Man Turn Off the Dark, which I should say went smoothly.

And none of the Spider-Men, none of the Green Goblins, none of the audience, everybody walked out as they entered.

You're saying you went to a Broadway show and there were zero deaths?

There was zero.

I mean, I will say half of the audience, and I'm not going to say which half I was in, I think was a little bummed out that nobody fell from the rafters.

But you guys remember Hal Wilner, rest in peace.

Yeah, absolutely.

Incredible SNL.

What was his specific title?

I don't know what Hal's title.

Some version of music.

Music guru.

Music superior.

He was a guy.

If you needed a sketch scored, Hal had this sort of encyclopedic knowledge of music.

He was also an incredible record producer.

He had the coolest friends in the world.

He was this kind of New York icon who was friends with people from Lou Reed to Jarvis Cocker to everybody.

He was at the opening, and I remember his son was sitting directly behind me, and his son was maybe eight or nine years old, let's say.

And the funny thing about Spider-Man as a Broadway musical is it's still got to tell the Spider-Man story.

And so, Green Goblin, he's singing a song about how he's going to go into this machine to give him superpowers.

and

what you don't know if you've never seen anything about spider-man is that he's gonna come out and be evil and he walks into this giant machine and this eight-year-old behind me hal's son just goes this isn't a good idea

destroyed everybody within earshot it was their last moment

this eight-year-old appreciating that um green goblin was making a bad decision why can't he see that this is gonna go bad he's literally singing a song about power and how much he wants it has he not read the greek myths

after that yeah what happened did you make fun of the show again afterwards publicly was bono there because it'd be great if he didn't show up bono was bono must have been an opening night wasn't one of the give up the smooches about that or am i thinking of something else i do feel like we have to take three giant steps back for our listeners

you don't think that's household name stuff the very fact that you're referring to the give up the smooches as a recurring thing that an audience i don't know what that is i i don't either even you guys two out of three of the lonely island don't know what give up the smooches are well yeah they didn't care for my live stuff they were just focused on the shorts yeah that's true this is very true they only had respect for pre-tape bits you were busy give up the smooch was andy in a full rigging where he had to hang upside down and come down from the rafters it was an update feature right yeah update feature yeah Basically, your head was next to mine and you kept trying to get me to kiss you.

Do the upside down smooch.

How do we not remember this?

You were probably editing.

But you were dressed like Spider-Man without the mask.

He had the mask, right?

And then you pulled it up?

Pulled it down to do the smooch.

Yeah.

Like Toby Maguire style.

Classic.

I didn't know how to title, I guess.

And it was Seth, give up the smooch.

Give up the smooch was your catchphrase in this sketch that required so much rehearsal.

I think I wrote it with Rob Klein.

In fact, I know I did.

Yeah, you definitely wrote it with Rob Klein.

And now it was deeply uncomfortable to hang upside down, correct?

Well, yes.

The funny thing was I kept writing things for myself where I hung upside down.

Because we did upside down Spider-Man for the Emma Stone monologue as well.

And we also did an update feature about the guy who got hung up on the ski lift.

Oh, where his pants fell down?

Who fell out of the ski lift, but didn't fall down off it.

His like leg was wrapped around it.

So amazing.

Basically, me and Klein kept writing stuff for me to be upside down, but every time we did it, they would always send me up like 10 minutes before the thing.

So I'd be upside down listening to you guys doing, listening to you mostly, doing update jokes and by the time they lowered me down all the blood had like rushed into my head so my face was like engorged and by the time the feature was over they'd bring me back down and my eyes would have like capillaries exploded all in them and in the next sketch i would look like i was like on math

you remember too how ken among would always tell you that whenever anybody had to be rigged on the show upside down it was like the flying walendas it was like a famous family that did the rigging for every Broadway show.

Oh, leave it to Ken to reference that.

He was like, this is Showbiz History, Pally.

Also, by the way, you think it's bad for you.

It was not my favorite to tell update jokes knowing that you were hanging above me.

Like the sword of Damocles.

Yeah, by the way, especially with all the Spider-Man musical stuff happening, I was like, if they are falling.

Well, also, you really got to knock on wood if you're going to joke on the fact that they're falling.

And in order to joke on it, you got to rig yourself up.

Karmically speaking, I was O to fall.

Yeah.

It's amazing how sexy that can be in Spider-Man and how probably unsexy it was to shoot, I would think.

Right.

For Toby.

The movie, they just like rig up Toby for one second and they're like, go, go, go, go, go.

We should call him.

I do think that a list I want to keep running for this podcast in our early nascent stages is guests we want to have on to answer really short questions.

That's great.

So Toby, just to explain real quick, how long he had had to be upside down.

Okay, well, yeah.

Ask him the one question.

He goes like, oh, like five minutes.

Okay, thanks for coming on.

Thanks for coming on, Toby.

And then ideally get him to do a live ad for us.

Long intro music, long outro music.

Can we start a list?

Yeah.

So we're going to have long guests, but I also want to have short guests, which are TOPS two questions.

I have two ideas for long guests.

Yep.

Okay.

Okay.

Neil Long, Justin Long.

Oh, I thought you were going to say,

that sucks.

Howie long.

Great.

Yep.

Seth, I got to say, like, for your intro for this, I get sort of jealous thinking about the time you didn't spend with us.

Oh, you shouldn't be.

I genuinely mean it.

I mean, for me, the first four years before you guys showed up, not because you weren't there yet, but that was my most fraught time at the show because I didn't feel like I knew what I was doing yet.

Yeah.

So it was a fun time to be in New York City, but you guys showed up right about the time where I finally felt like I had some footing on the show.

So I was a lot more fun to be around.

Wait, wait.

What year did you feel like that kicked over?

Because I remember my second year going up an elevator with Emily Spivey, who I consider like a vet.

Like she was a veteran writer who was getting like two to three pieces on every week.

And I was having like a panic attack in the elevator going up 17.

And I was like, when does this end?

And she was like, oh, it never ends.

I think my second year you guys were there, I started doing update and felt a little better.

That'll do it.

Whereas the first year you guys were there, I think it was the flop, sweatiest year I had.

Because

not just Andy, but also Bill Sedakis, first years for those guys.

Three male whites.

Three male whites.

And I was barely holding on as a male white.

I already felt like I was in third position behind Fred and Forte.

Right.

And then all of a sudden, I'm not even sniffing the podium.

I was like outside chance as a bronze medalist for best male white.

But it was rough.

And also, I really liked writing for all you guys more than I liked writing for me.

And I had this realization of, oh, if I don't like writing for me,

it's so funny.

The perception for everyone is completely different, though, because no one ever thinks they're on solid ground except for like two people.

And for us, I was like, oh, Seth gets something in Tapa's show every week.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I always thought of you as just like, oh, he's killing it.

But Tapa's show was a little different because sometimes, I don't know, I felt like a lot of cold opens that were serviceable.

You know what I mean?

They weren't things I you know what Akiva always liked to say.

What's that?

Top of show is top of co.

Oh, top of co-acco.

Oh, yeah.

He did.

Oh, that brings back the memories.

And I'd be like, oh, that's not quite a nested rhyme.

Yeah, that was your criticism of it.

I'd be like, yeah, but it works.

The more I say it, the more people agree.

That's right.

I will say this.

I don't remember what year it was.

I went into Lauren's office and said something about what I thought was wrong with update when I was hosting it.

And Lauren said,

update's the least of my problems.

And he didn't say it's not a problem, but there was something about him saying it was the least of his problems where I think, oh, look at me.

Teacher's time.

It looks like I might be not.

But that speaks to the fact that you're never on firm footing.

You're just like not the biggest problem in his world.

Right.

Look at me.

You just sucked less than everything else sucked at that moment.

Yeah.

No, it's always just like, well, I won't get fired this week.

How was your day, honey?

Let's just say I'm the least of Lauren's problems.

And he's got a lot of them.

His house in Amigansett has squirrels.

I had a weird path because when you write a sketch on SNL, you have to be under the bleachers with Lauren.

And because I was a cast member first, it wasn't until my fifth year that I wrote something where then I was under the bleachers because almost everything I wrote, I was in.

And it was so jarring to be under there and realize, oh, this is why writers are always in a terrible mood.

Like, I thought actors had it bad because if you're sketch bombed, you bombed in front of the audience, but it wasn't as bad.

No, there's nothing quite like bombing in front of the Lord.

And just, yeah.

Yeah.

If cast heard what was said about them, they would quit the business.

So Alex Bays, who took over Update after Doug Abels and now is the head writer for Late Night,

he did the thing you're not supposed to do, but it was so funny he had to do it, which is he basically shared an awful thing Lauren said about me during a weekend update, which is really funny because I realized now we do a thing on our show called a closer look, which is sort of our signature piece.

Amy had left, and I was trying to figure out a new kind of really thing to do.

And I had a magnifying glass and it was called a closer look, and I spoke with a Sherlock Holmesy accent and basically took a closer look at something.

And after it finished, Lauren turned to Baze and said, burn the tape.

You had to stick your cap to that.

Yeah, burn the tape is a really good.

You got to take some swings, though.

You got to take some swings.

Support for the Lonely Island and Seth Meyers podcast comes from Airbnb.

You know, guys, we talk a lot about Finland on this podcast, which never thought would happen.

But as my name is Jorma Takonen almost,

it makes sense and one thing that you guys may not have realized is that I stayed at an Airbnb when I was in Finland in Tampere

and one of the great things about that is that I felt like a native so when I said things like moi moi or moi to people they were like that guy's definitely finished also his name's Jorma anyway it was great there was a sauna in my place killer so I could feel the l

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It's great for family traditions.

Vacations are how you bring people together, guys.

And also, when I go back to Finland, I'll be probably staying at an Airbnb in Helsinki.

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What's my house doing just sitting there?

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So as the maybe proxy host of the show, I do want to keep things moving.

The goal to our listeners, I do want to say the goal of this is to go through the digital shorts over the years.

But before we get to that, let's talk real quick.

And guys, I've heard it before.

It's not the best story, but tell everybody how you met.

Well, Keith's been pretty quiet.

I think it's his turn.

Yeah, Keeve, jump on.

Yeah, Keeve, you take it off.

Oh, geez.

How fast can I get through it?

But pretty fast, right?

It's just,

we all grew up in Berkeley, California.

We went to the public schools.

Me and Yor met in seventh grade at Willard Junior High, and Andy was a grade younger, although not in years, just more like maybe got held back.

I don't know.

Yorm is over a year older than me.

Okay.

I'm the most mature.

So we met him when we were in eighth, and he's in seventh, but me and Yorm became friends in seventh, and then all of us became friends in 11th grade, really.

My 10th, you're 11th.

Again, I'm younger.

Yeah, yeah.

I mean, calendar year, you're not a year younger than me, but once again, I don't know how that happened.

Probably held back, I'm going to guess.

Right.

And we get a lot of the same references that Jorm is a little aged out of

that's right i was a big snorks guy growing up exactly whereas yorm was more into snorks yeah you know yeah

the thing about the snorks era is it had a hard out yeah hard out basically between grades there was no bleed no bleed on the snorks no they canceled it and that was it the snorks can i jump in i'm gonna interrupt your narrative real quick yeah i think the snorks were the first thing as a kid that i realized was a knockoff yes yes yes i think for all of us we were like well this this is a ripoff.

I like it, but this sucks.

Yeah, I'm going to watch it, but I don't respect it.

Like eight years old.

Yeah,

it's pretty shitty.

I can't believe you're doing the Smurfs like this, but I do like my snorks.

But Astro is a charming guy.

Do you have a favorite thing that's clearly a knockoff?

Ooh, that's a great question.

Yeah, gobots, right?

Oh, yeah.

Where gobots were second?

I think I just researched and found out that they were first, but in my mind, they were second and were the ripoff.

Oh, so then for me, Transformers.

Yes.

Yeah.

I guess Transformers.

Yeah.

The famous rip-off of Gobots.

What a knockoff.

Wait, there's no way.

Gobots was first?

All right.

So this is, again, you know, we're in the lab, so to speak.

That's our question for the next episode.

Everybody has to come up with their favorite knockoff.

Oh, I like that.

Is that engaging social?

Yeah.

Oh, that's smart.

We will get the answer really quickly.

When you guys tell me, I want you to preface it with hashtag knockoff.

Oh, that's really good.

All right, so you guys met in high school during the snorks era.

When did you guys realize you were collaborators?

When did you move to LA?

All at once together?

All at once in 2000.

Yorm had lived there because he went to UCLA.

Then me and Keeve both did film in college.

They both somehow took a year off, so we all graduated at the same time.

Again, I'm a year younger, full year younger.

You're NYU, Andy.

I graduated from NYU, yeah.

You're Santa Cruz, Keeve?

Me and Keeve hung at Santa Cruz, though, because I went to Santa Cruz my first two years.

This is interesting.

And then we all had made like video and film projects.

Yorm was doing acting and he acted in Keeves stuff.

And we met back up in the summer after we all graduated and showed each other the stuff we had made.

And we were like, oh, I see.

We're all dumbasses.

Let's work together since we're already friends and we want to do the same thing.

And we took a picture at Yorm's house that we still have.

We could put that in the show notes.

Yeah.

The evening we decided.

We had a lot of podcasts.

I always talk about show notes.

There was an evening where we met.

Well, we put that in the show.

I'm trying to tell the fucking story, piece of shit.

I want to ask Seth if we have show notes.

Stop asking about the first year about show notes.

We can do show notes, Keith?

This is the first time this story has ever been told.

All right, keep going, Andy.

I got to say, if anyone actually turned this on, they already know this story, probably, right?

Yeah, no, I mean, I guess not.

They might be just Seth heads.

That's true.

Do you think the Seth heads at this point are a little worried about the lack of politics?

Possibly.

What I do know they want is our three opinion on politics of the day.

Yeah.

When you go full politics and mix it with zero politics, I guess you end up with like a little bit.

Yeah.

Yeah.

This is, I think, a good level, which is zero.

So you moved to L.A.

I'll take it from here.

So we took this photo at my mom's house, which will be in the show notes.

Exactly.

And it was the three of us making a decision to go down to Los Angeles all together.

We all moved into my super shitty tiny apartment on the west side of Los Angeles.

Then I went on vacation and these guys looked for houses for two weeks.

I was in Hawaii with my girlfriend at the time, who's now my wife, but they found an awesome apartment on Fairfax and Olympic that Akiva ended up dubbing The Lonely Island.

But we went with it, so credit to us.

Yeah, more credit to us for approving Akiva's idea.

It's not a good name.

And hopefully we'll find a name for this podcast in the same organic way.

Burn the tape.

Burn the tapes.

You'll also find that this repeats, too, of me and Andy approving Keeves' great ideas.

Yeah, and then taking credit for being the approvers.

Yeah, not overtly, but just sometimes by being the face of the operation, getting credit.

Yeah, that's true.

Yeah.

So now you're making videos.

Yeah, we're all temping like really, really shitty temp jobs in Los Angeles.

Who was the worst temp of the three of you?

Ooh, that's really hard.

I think both me and Andy were probably tied.

I got fired three times.

I got fired a lot.

What did you get fired for?

I got fired from a BMW dealership on the west side of Los Angeles for printing my resume for another job.

That's more fun.

Yeah.

I was just late as shit every day, no matter where I was.

Yeah, I got fired for being late once.

And then our best firing story was that we would constantly take shittier temp jobs for shittier pay if we could all work together.

So we got a job working for Fox making Christmas ornaments.

It was just in a warehouse where we were tying ribbons onto silver stars for Fox employees.

And I think we were getting paid like $7 an hour.

Not bad.

And then about 45 minutes into our morning, a woman came over to us and was like, okay, I need you to sit over here.

And then I need you to sit over here.

We were like, wait, what?

Sorry, are we in fucking camp?

We were being separated.

And then we were like, no, no, no.

The only reason we took this job is because we wanted to talk to each other.

And she was like, well, that's not going to work for us because you guys aren't working well enough.

We were like, we think we're working better, actually.

And then she was like, well, you guys can leave if you don't want to separate.

And we're like, okay, great.

Well, you're missing one key detail, which is what?

She said, if you don't like it, you can leave.

And we went, hmm, what time is it?

And we checked our watch and we were like, they're still serving McDonald's breakfast.

So we quit.

we took our hour-long seven dollars and we went and got mcdonald's breakfast that was the deciding factor yeah when you made the decision based on that she probably didn't think i can't believe i let him get away

you're in la you're making short videos they're airing what was that show where they would show videos every week channel something yeah airing is not really the right word for it but it was almost like a mini film festival each month where 200 people would get together to show each other their videos channel 101 which was created by dan harmon and rob shraub

shout out to our band harmony what's the path from you guys doing that to you guys writing for the movie awards we purposefully didn't take jobs specifically because a friend of ours had sort of gotten into the circuit of writing for like sitcoms and then never got to do their own stuff so we'd sort of seen like oh if you get into that world sometimes like that's the end and you just start writing for other people and so we always kind of wanted to do our own thing I was just talking about this the other day and I think it was also on the naive idea that they would take away our specialness and we would go be a cog in a machine and we were 22 and self-righteous and didn't realize you can go work on a sitcom for six years and then go be Charlie Kaufman, like the most original writer of all time.

In our minds, the moment we became corporate drones, we would disappear into the system.

Well, we're from Berkeley.

I don't remember ever even talking about it.

We just would when we were so broke.

Did we get offered to write on shows, though?

No.

no, no, that's what I'm saying.

Like, we didn't get offered.

And nobody knew who we were.

No.

I think that's very nice of you to establish, Andy, for our industry listeners.

Yeah.

No.

That no offer was made.

None offers.

Got it.

We were literally like boogeynights, like coked up in the attic, like, and if they offer a job for us, they say no, because we got morals.

Does it count as principled that this never got road tested?

Yeah.

But we couldn't afford Coke.

Well, yeah.

Our friend got us a job on the Movie Awards, put us in touch with Joel Gallen,

and split a single writer check.

This should be noted for people not in showbiz, this is another reason why it was good that you guys didn't take a sitcom job.

This weird thing where two people are allowed to be one writer.

They allowed us to be one writer, and I think that we got $100 a day.

And then after taxes, that covered like a burrito.

It was $1,000 a week.

So we were getting $333 each.

And we already had gotten managers and agents that we we were really proud that we had gotten agents and managers.

So we were also paying them 20% of $333 a week each.

I will point out that the MTV Movie Awards were a cool job at that point.

Like when we would look at previous scripts, it was like Wayne and Show Walter had worked on it and like Chris Henchy and John Glazer was there with us.

Yeah.

And John Benjamin.

They were both there.

That's right.

That's right.

Yeah.

It was a great show.

Yeah.

I remember it being a show as a comedy person you didn't want to miss.

For sure.

I mean, there were very memorable things like the Stiller stunt double with Tom Cruise thing was like a sketch that was not on a sketch show that everyone knows.

Yes.

And MTV had super deep pockets then.

So the sketches looked great.

Yeah.

They looked amazing.

Yeah.

It was a lot of cutting people into the movies and stuff.

And it was just cool for us to be able to write for like actually cool famous people on these little pops.

And I feel like first year we barely got anything on.

It's also pre-social media, so it was still rare to get to see movies get made made fun of in any way.

Right.

And a bunch of famous people in one place, like not in a movie or a show.

Yeah, that was still rare.

And you guys did it twice, though?

Yeah.

Yeah, we did the Lindsey Lohan.

Lindsey Lohan was first year.

But then the second year is the big year because Fallon hosts.

Correct.

Fallon hosts.

He brings Shoemaker, Higgins, and a ton of SNL writers with him.

Right.

Including you.

No.

No.

But you were just there?

The after parties, I think, maybe the first time we met, but I did not write on it.

I would have remembered if Seth was writing.

Yeah.

Right, but I feel like you were in town.

I feel like we hung hung out in hotel rooms with a bunch of SNL writers while we were doing it, and I feel like you were there.

100%.

Yeah.

And I remember Shoemaker, who, again, just to give people backstory, Shoemaker was a producer at SNL when we were all there.

He's a name that's going to come up a ton.

He's now the producer of this show.

He's the best.

For my money, there's no better friend to writers in television than Mike Shoemaker.

Tell us why.

Because he just sees what you're good at and tells you what to do with your own skills, as opposed to telling you that thing that other people do, where they tell you sort of what's hot right now.

Yeah.

His thing is: what you do is great.

Here's how you should take what you do and make it the thing that's hot right now.

He is a wonderful person.

He's also someone who can tell when people are spinning out, and he's good at telling them you're worrying about the wrong thing, you're fine.

Yeah.

Which, especially at SNL, you just need someone to tell you that.

He also worked his way up from like PA, right, at SNL?

Yeah.

So he started in 1985, he was a script PA at SNL, where writers would write sketches in 1985 on yellow legal pads.

And then he just slowly worked his way up and I think understood the bones of that place better than anybody.

When we first got hired, our first meeting was in Shoemaker's office, like with all the new writers that got hired, right?

Keeve, you were there.

Andy wasn't there for this, but we were waiting for Tucker, Brian Tucker.

And I just remember meeting Shoemaker and being like, I can't believe this is our boss.

Like one of our bosses.

Like, I was like, this dude is so fucking funny and great and like the nicest dude and have never changed my opinion of him.

Yeah.

I feel like Shoemaker and I always laugh that I would not have the career I have without Shoemaker.

And what works great is he tells everybody what to do.

And if you listen, he loves you.

If you listen, it goes great.

I mean, he understood very early on on what the best use of my skills were.

I think he did with you guys as well.

And people who sort of don't fight it have a pretty high percentage of winning.

As we go through these shorts, he will come up a lot, especially right at the beginning, because he was the main person encouraging us to keep doing them.

One last interesting thing about Shoemaker.

I recently had dinner with him.

It was supposed to be with him and Seth, but Seth had another baby, so he bailed.

It's true.

Classic.

And Shoemaker, after a few drinks, confessed to me finally that even though he thought I was funny and Seth was funny, that his favorite comedian is Colin Quinn and everyone else sucks in comparison.

This is very true.

He's like, I get why you guys are good.

Shoemaker has always put Quinn first.

Wait, that's real?

He's like, I get why you guys are good, but he's for me.

Quinn is my guy.

I was like, look, I get it.

I love Quinn.

Yeah.

When Quinn is on our show, it's the most heartbreaking thing because Shoemaker has a super recognizable laugh.

And he sits the same place every show I do.

And when Quinn is on, Quinn gets like 10 Shoemaker laughs.

And in my head, I'm thinking, I think that's what I got in all of May.

He loves Quinn.

I mean, Colin Quinn is super funny.

We all love him.

But I will say, everybody that was at the show at the same time as him, like, they know the truth that he's actually the funniest of all of them.

Not only is he the funniest, but he's so up Shoemaker's alley as a pure New York comedian because Shoemaker is pure New York.

Yeah.

Yep.

So jumping ahead, you guys meet Shoemaker.

He likes you guys.

Andy, I remember some of what you did in your audition that got you hired.

Do you remember your audition?

I do.

I want to know what you remember.

Well, I remember watching audition.

It filled a huge hole because obviously at SNL, you're always looking for people who can play those who are in the news.

And at the time, we didn't have a Swedish chef.

You have to remember from like 2001 to 2005 when the Swedish chef was in the news.

Yeah, yeah.

I don't know if you remember, but like there were some weeks where it was conspicuous in its absence.

Yeah,

there's gonna be so many people who've auditioned for the show who listened to this.

They're like, What the fuck?

Oh, yeah, you did the Swedish chef.

If you auditioned for this show and didn't get it, and you like overthought it and you were like, What do they need?

What are they looking for?

They don't want that.

I know they don't want that.

You really came in and basically said,

off.

Here's the thing: I'm a politico

as established.

Yes, yeah, we all think that.

I didn't and still kind of don't follow the news.

That's probably better.

I mean, I watch a closer look from time to time.

Thank you, buddy.

Yeah.

The old one that was in dress rehearsal that got cut.

Yeah, the Sherlock Holmes one.

That's the one.

Wait, that's.

So when somebody says to you, I love Seth Meyer's Closer Looks, you're thinking of the magnifying glass.

Like, oh, you have access to that?

Must be some dark web shit.

What was your Swedish chef impression?

How long did you do the Swedish chef?

I mean, we did them all at the time for each other, like, or me and Andy.

You guys helped me write my audition, which was very nice.

Yeah.

You know who else helped me with my audition was Will Forte for no reason other than just to be nice.

Like, fully helped me workshop it.

That's classic Forte.

Should be noted.

Another name that will come up a great deal in this podcast.

Genuinely one of the nicest, most selfless human beings.

To a fault.

Often to the detriment of the people who are currently with him.

Yes.

If you go into a party, the deeper you go in with Will Forte, you're not leaving with Will Forte because he's going to say goodbye to every motherfucker on the way out.

Yeah, yep.

But audition, yeah, what did you do?

Schmorgidyborg, you smorgeny borged.

I smorgedy board.

Oh, I think it was like a commercial for like pop songs, but it was the Swedish chef singing them, so it was basically just like the sweetest chef doing in the air tonight by Phil Collins.

And I think I did like a long wind-up to the like schmorg dort, did smorg did

Better than I remember.

Yeah.

So, wait, Andy, is all you remember Sweetest Chef?

Because that's all I remember.

No, I remember probably all of it, if I really just do it for us.

It had to be under five minutes.

It's a mix of stand-up.

I had been doing stand-up.

Oh, right.

So, you did some stand-up.

You did chef.

I did Ross Trent in one of them.

Really?

Which ended up being a digital short.

Years in.

Yes.

I feel like I weirdly did actually do a lot of what I did in my audition on the show, but it always ended up being like one line in a sketch.

Like, I think I did an impression of Billy Bob Thornton.

Right.

Did you do Jimmy Fallon?

I did Jimmy Fallon, and I ended up doing that with Jimmy.

We like redid his McJagger mirror thing with me and him when he hosted.

Do you remember an update you did on air where you played Jimmy Fallon at Hanukkah that got cut?

It didn't air.

I did an update feature called Jewie Fallon.

And it was just me as Jimmy talking about Jewish stuff.

I feel like, what do we think?

On the count of three, I want everybody to answer.

In 2024, can you do a character called Jewie Fallon?

One, two, three?

Of course you can.

You think definitely yes?

Oh, for sure.

If you're Jewish.

Yeah.

Yeah, that's true.

You could.

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So you get hired and then you guys get hired as writers.

Akeevanor.

Yeah.

Andy went, did an audition, came back.

Then they said, all right, that went well enough.

Why don't all three of you come in and audition?

So Andy had to do a second audition and we had really scraped the barrel to try to put together that first one.

And then, of course, in classic SNL fashion, they go, Don't do anything you did the first time.

So, he had to come up with a whole new one.

And we weren't coming from like an improv theater background.

Like, we had been making all these little short films together and borrowing video cameras from friends and equipment and things like that, and just making stuff together because that's what we knew.

But we weren't coming from like a being on stage every day, like making up new characters.

So, it was scraping the barrel to be like, Here's an impression of this guy.

It is weird because this is part of the first half of your first season, which is how far you guys went from your strengths.

Like you did this arc away from it and then back to it.

It's so weird that the show didn't know from the beginning, oh, these guys make short films.

Right.

That was not a job opening.

That was not a slot that needed to be filled.

It wasn't.

And nor did anyone know that we did that.

I think that Shoemaker, I had seen episodes of The Boo.

So that was your OC parody to time stamp it.

So I knew you guys made short videos.

But even then, working at the show, it did not occur to me that that would be your path forward.

And we realized that sort of quickly, because I remember one of the first things we wrote for the show was a sketch that was a musical.

Correct me if I'm wrong, guys, but it was Andy as a young man who wants to wear his shorts at night.

And his overly strict father, who I believe was Forte, won't let him wear his shorts at night.

And it was a musical.

And then at one point, he flew out of a window on shorts like Aladdin of like his dream of wearing shorts at night.

Just a drastic overreach in our very first episode.

And it was a real realization at the table of being like, This doesn't work for this show.

To be fair, that would not have worked as a pre-tape either.

No, it sucked.

Right.

It wouldn't have.

Yeah.

But it was just like explaining your humor is a difficult thing occasionally.

And the videos for us were sort of a shortcut to doing that because you can just sort of present the idea after the fact.

That's true.

I do want to start talking about this effort you guys made for live sketches.

And I've done some research, but real quick, oh boy, did you all find out at the same time that you were hired?

I found found out first.

I believe the story is I found out on a Friday and we spent the whole weekend sweating it out and being like, Andy, you have to take it.

Like they were being so nice.

They were like, you have to take it.

It's your dream.

And if they hire both of us, we'll come.

But if they only hire one of us, then we'll stick together.

You'll go off without us.

And it was like super dramatic and intense.

And by the way, like it was.

We had been working together for five straight years and living together.

Yeah.

Me and Yorm had to make a pact, essentially, so that there wouldn't be one of us left in LA by ourselves.

And now, all jokes aside, because earlier we talked about how you guys turned down all these sitcom jobs you were never offered, but I think I can venture that you guys would have kept that pact.

Yeah, absolutely.

Do you really think now today, if only one of you had gotten hired, you guys would have said no?

I think we would have.

I think it would have been a crazy hard decision, but I think we would have.

Yeah.

I don't know how they ever could have decided between us since we turned in a writing packet together.

No, but I did audition and I didn't get the show.

So that might have been more of a strike against one of us.

I requested a a writer's meeting, by the way, when they offered us all the audition after Andy did good.

And I was like, I'll go for a writer's meeting.

And so I had a meeting with Tina and Lauren.

Oftentimes, though, Jorn, people audition, and it helps their cause getting hired as a writer because you get to show off your writing.

I got one laugh that I can remember in my audition.

It was just me dancing as a 13-year-old at a bar mitzvah.

And it was no words.

And it was just like really awkward.

It was kind of like a Just You Guys character, just very awkward.

I've heard of that.

Dancing and like small.

And I got one audible laugh from Tina.

And I was like, fuck yeah.

If that was just that, that was fucking worth it.

Yeah, it's like, why don't they make the whole plane out of the black box, right?

That's probably what she was thinking.

Oh, we'll just do this.

So guys, Andy's first appearance on the show is Bill and Andy Impression Off on October 1st, 2005.

Bill Hayter and Andy Sandberg.

Lay it out for us, guys.

Well, we had tried to write some big barn burner sketch that Yorm has already talked about.

And when nothing we did got picked, we got told, like, oh, you always get a second chance to figure out something on the show because you can always slide an update in.

So we knew that was the only chance something else could get on the show.

And so it must have been Thursday night, and me and Andy had an apartment together.

So it was like three or four in the morning on Thursday night.

Andy, is that your memory of it?

I think that was the gist.

I mean, it was born of me knowing that Bill, who we were already buddies with, was really good at impressions and I was famously bad at them.

and just kind of leading into that.

It's very fun to rewatch because the game is that Bill does great impressions and you do terrible ones.

Yes.

But the other fun thing is that, and I don't know if this was the backbone of the idea, Bill's impressions were not for the audience.

No, they're still so old.

He had a really good Peter Falk and a really good James Mason, but they don't actually kill.

Like they're insanely good, but it's not like crushing.

That probably helped your cause, Andy.

But that's a good intro to Bill, though, and Bill's heart.

Okay, Peter Falk.

Listen, gee, this guy, this guy's wacko, I tell you, he's really wacko.

Pretty good, but how about a little Jack Nicholson?

Here we go.

Hey, how's it going?

I'm Jack Nicholson.

Wazza!

My next impression is acclaimed English actor James Mason.

I've told you before, Lolitz are no boys.

Thank you.

How about a little dash of Julia Roberts?

Hey, how's going on?

Julia Roberts, the pretty woman.

What's that?

Question for you, Andy, because a sketch I wrote, and again, time-stamping when you guys started, we did a fundraiser for Katrina sketch, and it was celebrities and builded Pacino.

And destroyed.

Yeah, it was one of those show-stopping moments.

We are building a new house in the new New Orleans.

We'll put the doors wherever we want.

Oh,

there's a Shihhtzu stump in a Spanish oak tree.

I go to save that dog.

It's fascinating now to know, and Bill's talked openly about his anxiety.

on the show.

And again, to echo what we said, nobody has an easy ride, nobody ever thinks.

But at that moment, standing next to him, because I was doing my less well-received Anderson Goop,

but I knew having been on the show for at that point, you know, it was beginning of my fifth season.

If I could have said anything to him after that, it would have been, oh, you're going to be fine.

Yeah, it was like a rock concert.

He was the next thing, for sure.

Who were you in that sketch, Andy?

I was holding a boom mic.

Oh.

I was like a guy in the news crew.

But you fucking nailed it, though.

Everybody thought you nailed it.

Yeah.

But Bill and Andy Impression Off was a success.

It should be noted.

Yeah, it went well.

You do what Bill Murray did.

You guys come off as charming.

When it ends, everybody, I believe, thinks, oh, I'm excited to see more of those two guys.

Sure.

I mean, it definitely set up who we were.

Yeah.

Like Bill doing amazing impressions of super old cinephile actors and me being like a massive doofus.

Yep.

Then an episode later, congratulations, you get your first sketch on the werewolf.

To be just starting on the show and get something on the first two episodes we were feeling pretty good you should wait and are you a werewolf too oh what this no no it's just a mustache yeah i like the way it looked on tom so much i decided to grow one myself

huh they get it tom you're a wolf It was a guy who brings home a first date and he starts warning her in a way that lets you know he's a werewolf and at midnight or whatever, he's going to have a transformation and be horrific.

And then then the time strikes and all of a sudden it's just now he's hideous, but the only thing that changes is now he has like a nice mustache.

Yeah.

And he's like, don't look at me.

I'm hideous, essentially.

A recurring theme of mustaches in our work.

Yeah.

Mustaches play a big role in your first year on the show.

But now there's one.

It's really going to sound like busting, but it's the greatest gift you guys ever gave.

Because one, you guys wrote a pre-tape bit that went badly.

I think at this moment, I think it's safe to say, Akiva, especially, I remember you saying, I want to shoot my own stuff based on how this went.

Oh, Oh, I know what it is.

But also, this song has never left my head.

It's a fucking earworm.

JJ Casuals.

Keep it casual,

whatever.

Keep it natural with shoes that look like feet.

Things get hectic, but don't swear to keep it JJ Casual.

Shoes that look like feet.

Can I explain this one?

Please.

JJ Casuals was Andy doing the impression of Jack Johnson.

It was a commercial parody.

JJ Casuals are shoes that look like feet.

The whole premise is sometimes you go to a restaurant and they make you wear shoes.

But if you're Jack Johnson, you don't want to wear shoes because you keep it casual.

And so there's shoes that look like feet.

As a premise, it all makes sense to me.

I re-watched it.

The audience, they're keeping it casual too.

Out of respect for the writers.

Out of respect.

But I will tell you that in my life, not a month goes by where I don't think.

Things get hectic, but don't sweat it.

Keep it JJ casual.

It is the catchiest words to live by.

Yeah.

Things get hectic, but don't sweat it.

Keep it JJ casual.

The writing was on the wall.

There was some tunes coming.

Tunes were coming.

Yeah.

As a sketch, didn't quite land.

Well, we were not allowed in the editing room.

We got positive feedback, I will say.

Yes.

When you're that new on the show, just getting something on feels like such a big win.

Even something not doing well to you is so far beyond what you expect, which is to not get anything on.

I will say every one of these we were counting as a win, even when we knew they weren't doing good.

I remember, to be honest, when you wrote JJ Casuals, I thought it was super funny because we would pick the commercial parodies before the season started.

And so I loved it.

And I do feel like the problem was maybe the sensibility of who ended up shooting it and editing it was different yeah and i don't want to call anybody out or anything but there was a moment that we had while shooting it where keeve leaned over to me while it was being shot because you didn't have that much power in this particular scenario none yes none power but they allowed riders on set and keeve leaned over and was like they just crossed the line and i was like oh my god yeah it's day one of things day one it's the eye line and we were like wait a minute it was a moment where there was two people at the matrix you know at the front desk of a restaurant and they flipped sides.

And I was like, I like whispered it to Yorm and like drew a diagram.

Was like, maybe we don't understand.

Maybe they're doing something else.

We were like, oh, maybe we're wrong.

And then we just watched them waste the time of like do the whole scene, realize it slowly by talking to some script supervisor, come back, set the camera on the other shoulder, and do the scene again.

And it was one of the things that we were like, oh, we should do the thing that we've been doing for the last five years.

I guess we do know enough.

And I do remember, I'm saying this as a criticism of myself and also a compliment to you guys.

I remember you came back, Keeve, after shooting that and said basically a different version of what you just explained about crossing the line.

And you were a little bit more heated than you are now with time.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah.

And I remember the way I responded to you, because again, I'd been there for a few years and I think I had sort of relaxed into what the establishment of the show was.

I felt like that scene where in Chinatown where the cop takes Nicholson and goes, it's Chinatown, Jamie.

It was like, this is just how it is.

Because I think in some degree, like when you cross the line in filmmaking, they always say that's like if it's both your mother and your sister.

Yeah, that's what they say.

And I think that's just to like tip people to how this podcast obviously turns out.

You guys were unsatisfied with that as an outcome.

And I will say, like, that kind of sentiment was also expressed to us on set.

Yeah.

It was in the editing room.

That was what I was about to say.

There was multiple things.

It was on set.

We felt like, not just with the flipping of the thing, but also Andy was worried about doing the song and they wasted the whole day on things that didn't matter, like the side characters.

And they were like, okay, now it's time for Andy to do his song.

We have five minutes left.

And he got like two takes.

Then we got into editing, really spent a couple hours writing down really detailed notes that were like frame specific of like, you could get out of that cut a little earlier.

Yeah.

Sat with the editor and she was like, oh yeah, these are all great.

Then the person in charge came in.

We went, got maybe into two like, okay, well, we have a bunch.

She could just do them and show you our cut.

But he's like, let me hear them.

And we're like, all right, first one is this.

We got maybe two in.

And he realized we had a whole sheet of like frame-specific notes.

And that's when he said what Joram said: like, okay, okay, okay, I get the idea.

You know, guys, he's like, essentially, like, pushing us on the back out the door.

This show is watched by 12-year-olds and people who are high on weed.

Oh, you guys can just, and he ushered us into an elevator, and then the elevator broke, and we were stuck in the elevator at the Brill building for like three hours.

Oh, man, I forgot.

Oh, my God, I forgot.

So maybe that's what you were picking up on, also, Seth, when we came back and were a little heated.

Yeah.

Yeah, just like, oh, wait, what the fuck?

No, we care a little bit more about this than that.

It was also when you're not at the show, as you know, the real world and especially comedians talk a lot of shit about the show.

And we had been defenders of the show as people who would watch it religiously every week.

This is important to note because I think that's true.

There's a lot of people before they get on the show sometimes could be comedian haters of the show, which, by the way, a position I understand and respect, but you guys were never that.

No, we were obsessed with it.

We watched every week.

Yeah, and we would have our critiques, but we would almost keep them insular to our group of like, oh man, we don't like that one.

Oh, that's so good.

I think we had an understanding of the challenge of the show.

But after defending it from people who thought the show was lazy and being like, are you kidding?

It's so much work.

It's not lazy.

They're trying their best.

And then have somebody who worked at the show essentially say exactly what all those people always are imagining the people are saying at SNL.

We were like, oh, no, are they right?

That can't be right.

So then I guess the tipping point is you guys shoot something just for yourselves over one of the first breaks of that fall of 05.

Do you remember going to air Andy with Sea Captain?

Oh, but it got cut, didn't it?

Yeah, it did not air.

I went to dress.

What was the premise?

I was a young sea captain?

You were a 17-year-old sea captain.

Right, right, right.

And it was basically one take Tony, right?

It was like, don't worry, I'm a prodigy.

And da-da-da.

And then we immediately crashed.

So, yeah, you're a 17-year-old captain.

Everybody's like very concerned that you're a 17-year-old captain.

I read it today.

It is crazy how many pages in before the turn.

Yeah, we can get it.

You're just a very competent sea captain.

So, this is like page three, Amy Pohler.

You know, I heard a rumor that the captain of this ship is a 17-year-old boy.

17?

That can't be right.

Oh, it's right, all right.

You're talking about Chip Youngblood, the youngest sea captain in all the world.

Page four, still haven't met him.

Finally, he walks in.

Page five.

Good afternoon, Wilkins.

Good afternoon, Captain Youngblood.

What's the weather report?

Well, winds out of the southwest hit 15 knots, sir.

Oh.

15.

Are you sure?

Feels more like 12 to me.

Well, uh.

Right, you are, sir.

12 knots.

You never cease to amaze.

All right, so that's page five.

Jesus.

Page six, still like nothing.

Dry as a bone.

I feel suspense.

Page seven, still nothing.

A lot of different sets, by the way.

You're like in the dining hall on the

screen.

Keep it expensive.

Then, VT pre-tape scale model of the ocean liner immediately crashing into an iceberg.

What was that?

Sir, we've hit an iceberg.

An iceberg?

No!

Who would put an iceberg in the middle of the ocean?

I was so happy reading this because it was such a reminder that your sense of humor has always been used sense of humor.

Oh, by the way, this was written, it makes a lot of sense.

This was written for Lance Armstrong.

Oh, yeah.

Best show ever.

And then the rest of the sketch is just you being a fucking shitheel.

Yeah.

Blames everybody else.

Will you go to the front page and tell me the names in the upper left corner?

Samberg.

Damn it.

Schaffer.

Tacone.

Damn it.

Higgins.

Damn it.

Higgins.

He made it in.

Nice.

Hig bones.

Please pull yourself together and lead the crew.

I don't want to lead the crew.

I hate them.

They're smelly and they smell like smelly fish.

Sucks.

Yeah.

That's a good turns up.

That's like every other line.

Saying the crew of a ship smells like smelly fish, I do endorse.

So you're still endorsing.

That's good.

So, Seth, yet another success that you're pointing out.

But somehow for us, it really felt like we were failing at the live portion of this show.

Yes.

Very much so.

And there was our first off week.

Me and Key were very kind of embittered and like, oh, just feeling like, shit, what the fuck?

Like, let's go out and make something.

And we did a music video based on the yin-yang twins song, the whisper song, called the Ping Bong Brothers, which was a very mature highbrow joke of us whispering about how you might enjoy our penises.

I watched it today and I thought, oh, this will be a cool deep cut for people to look at online.

And then I looked, it has 16 million views.

Well, now.

Yeah, but I'm just saying, I kind of thought it was this weird deep cut track.

But this is a Key Van Yorm on camera.

Classically, you guys, it's a minute and 20 seconds.

It's got fake mustaches.

It's got the doorstep of your actual apartment at the time.

Yes.

Which will make a return appearance almost immediately.

So you guys shoot this thing.

Yes, we make this little short.

It's probably under two minutes long it's a minute 20 minute 20 perfect length for that joke it's probably too long actually in addition to movie awards we'd also worked for gephoria which is a music video no video game award show video game award show for ge4 which was a network and did we submit it to them keith did that have something to do with gephoria no no it must have been that we put it on youtube and then they found it because later on that next week on a friday i remember we like turned it on we were like the thing that we did is going to air on another channel oh maybe they they use it as a weird bumper?

They played the whole thing.

It was like maybe for a show or something like that.

Somebody picked it up.

But we were like, oh, shit, this thing that we made is now airing on a different television channel.

Oh, you know what?

I think that they had a show on G4 that was like way earlier than like a Tosh.0.

Like web clips.

Something like that.

Yeah.

It was just like, oh, they thought it was funny.

Yeah, yeah.

Where they would just collect things from the world and just play things and like talk about them.

And so they played it on that.

I think you're right.

I remember thinking like, oh, this is what we should be doing.

Like, this is how we can get stuff on TV.

But we did that one.

I remember we came back to the show after Thanksgiving and we showed it to Shoemaker.

And he was like, wow, that's really cool.

You guys just made that, but it's you guys.

Do something like that, but do it with the cast.

See what happens.

Higgins, too.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I remember Higgins and Shoemaker sat us down and told the three of us, like, hey, if you guys want to make something like that, but using Andy or using the cast or both, that would be great.

Yeah, the show is always very encouraging.

And I will say, I watched it with Shoemaker today and Shoemaker said, even the font, because if you watch that, like the fonts kind of evoke Andy popping into frame, there was a style to it that looked different than anything you'd seen before.

I will say that is another Akiva staple because you were always the best at editing.

Kev always loved this like sort of off-yellow impact font, and then it just became like our staple Lonely Island font.

Well, guys, I think this is actually a pretty good natural ending point because we're abutting the first digital short, which will be our next episode.

For anybody who wants to get ahead of it, it's called Lettuce.

And that stoop is the exact same stoop from the Bing Bong Brothers.

And Lazy Sunday.

And Lazy Sunday.

Saving a buck or two on locations.

You know, a lot of people in New York City are walking around looking for that sex in the city stoop.

Meanwhile, the digital short stoop is two and a half blocks away.

Exactly.

Seth's Corner will be a very important segment on the show where anytime there's a digital short, I'm going to tell you a thing I wrote.

So, Seth, we should maybe do a tee up, though, to transition into that.

So it is Seth's Corner.

We're going to do a segment on the show called Seth's Corner.

We put no preparation into this intro, but I'm going to let Andy do it.

Now, I know all y'all are hearing a lot about TLI, short for Lonely Island, but we also have my main man Seth Myers on this booch.

And that means we got to turn the magnifying glass on him.

So every one of these podcasts, we're going to take a quick detour into something I like to call Seth's Corner.

That's right, it's Seth's Corner, where we ask Seth something he wrote on the episode that we're talking about.

And when he tells us what it is, we're going to tell him what we think for real this time.

Not because we were scared of him like back then when he was our boss.

No, now we're going to tell him the real truth.

Prepare to be Ream, Seth.

And welcome to Seth's Corner.

Sing the jingle, Yorm.

Seth's Corner, you're all invited.

Seth's Corner, it's happening right now.

Take it away, Seth.

So, Seth, what did you write this episode?

Everybody, thank you for listening to episode one.

We will see you soon.