You Can Rebuild No Matter Where You Are

Speaker 1 Brought to you by the Every Dollar App. Start budgeting for free today.

Speaker 2 Normal is broke, and common sense is weird. So, we're here to help you transform your life from the Ramsey Network in the Fair Ones Credit Union studio.
This is the Ramsey Show. I'm Jade Warshaw.

Speaker 2 Next to me, George Camill, taking calls about your life and your money all hour long and even longer.

Speaker 2 so if you want to get involved numbers 888-825-5225 that's how you do it all right Amy is in Canada hey Amy how can we help you out today

Speaker 3 hey thanks for taking my call

Speaker 3 so my question is

Speaker 3 how to navigate parents giving lots of gifts knowing It's from debt and it makes us feel anxious. So,

Speaker 3 yeah, I guess we're just wondering, is it okay to say no to my parents spending money on our family?

Speaker 2 Well, yeah, of course you can always say no. I mean, you don't have to accept it, but I kind of want to get juicy.
I want to know more about what type of

Speaker 4 gifts these are. How much are they spending? How long has this been going on?

Speaker 3 Yeah, so

Speaker 3 they'll spend upwards of two grand per child, so four kids, multiple grandchildren,

Speaker 3 for Christmas and even for birthdays, where they always want to take us out for dinner. They always have points to upgrade their flights or our flights or fly us across country.
Wow.

Speaker 3 And we know

Speaker 3 that, so they're empty nested hoarders and

Speaker 3 they have, I don't know how much debt they're in, but I know they have a few ATVs, a trailer, a fifth wheel, a boat, a vacation home, and we know that none of those are paid off, maybe just a couple of the ATVs.

Speaker 2 Do they have any?

Speaker 2 Because some people live a lifestyle where it's like, I have a bunch of debt over here, but I also have a bunch of assets over here and I just play that game.

Speaker 3 Do they have a bunch of assets somewhere or

Speaker 2 do they not have enough to retire?

Speaker 3 No, they keep like talking about how they need to keep pushing their like 60 and they need to keep pushing back their retirement. They still like have a home that's not paid off.

Speaker 4 Got it. How much have they shared with you regarding their financial problems?

Speaker 3 My dad has shared a decent amount he was like not aware of the finances in their home until maybe five years ago

Speaker 3 but then once the mom found out then he kind of has stopped sharing as much but he had no idea how much that they were in and so it the whole situation just feels irky and then it's how to protect our family but knowing that we can't advise them but we don't we don't know how to just say stop spending money on us well i don't know that you can tell them or make them change their behavior large scale.

Speaker 2 I think that if it makes you feel icky to take a gift, you can easily say no.

Speaker 2 And I think that that's probably more what this call is about.

Speaker 2 So if they say, hey, everybody, we're all we're loading up the family and we're going to Bora Bora and we're paying for everybody, you can say, oh, well, me and Steve will pay our for our own ticket.

Speaker 2 You know, that's that's fine.

Speaker 4 Are they pretty aggressive with it?

Speaker 3 Yeah, and we've tried to put some boundaries in place and they will just show up. And if we say no to a vacation, I mean we can't afford to pay our way, then it's like a very dramatic and

Speaker 3 so wait a minute.

Speaker 2 So when you put boundaries in your life of we can't afford that, then that irks them.

Speaker 3 Of course.

Speaker 3 Why would we not go in debt to go on a family vacation? Yeah.

Speaker 4 But you think you have a better relationship with your father to have a serious conversation with him and go, hey, based on what you've told me, there's a lot going on here financially, and it feels like you guys covering all of our expenses is only hurting that.

Speaker 4 And we just don't want to be a part of making this problem worse. How would he respond to that?

Speaker 3 Yeah,

Speaker 3 I think he probably would respond well. I just, I don't know how much control he has over the actual.

Speaker 4 So it's mom that is the out-of-control addictive spender?

Speaker 3 Yeah, I would say so.

Speaker 4 Well, that might be a conversation he needs to have with her.

Speaker 4 If he has the place of authority in the relationship versus you, then it's going to need to be him convincing her that, hey, we're in a bad situation.

Speaker 4 And if we ever want to retire one day, we need to start cleaning this mess up. And it starts with not being overly generous when we really can't afford to be.

Speaker 2 And you know what?

Speaker 2 I'm really thinking about this because

Speaker 2 I also think if you can approach this, I'm kind of thinking about it in the way of how we talk about college and how we should set expectations about parents paying for college.

Speaker 2 I'm kind of thinking that same thing. I think you need to go because I'm always about keeping the ball in your court, right? What's Amy doing? What's your life about? What are your boundaries?

Speaker 2 Because you can't really control them. So I might have a conversation with dad and mom and say, hey, I would like to set some expectations

Speaker 2 on my end. regarding your retirement.
And I would just let them know. I'd say, hey, I want you guys to know up front.
I don't know what your plans are, but I want you to know.

Speaker 2 I keep calling your husband Steve. I don't know what his name is, but I just want you to know Steve, Steve, and I are not going to be able to contribute to your retirement.

Speaker 2 So I just want you to know that up front. I want to tell you that early and often so that there's no expectation that we would be able to help you out financially in any way.

Speaker 2 I don't know what your expectations were, but I just want to let you know this is where we're at. And that way,

Speaker 2 when the time comes, because like I said, you can't change your mom, can't change your dad, you can, you know, gently nudge them and tell them what you think in a loving way, but they may not do it.

Speaker 2 But that way, if the time comes, they know, don't come knocking on your door for extra money in retirement. And so, that's one thing that you could do.

Speaker 2 And that alone might get their wheels turning on, why would she say that? I wonder if she's concerned. Should we be concerned?

Speaker 2 So, sometimes just putting your boundaries in place is enough to get the other person thinking about their own situation.

Speaker 3 Yeah, that's good. I like that.

Speaker 4 And then the other piece of this is you may not be able to change them. You may not be able to stop them.
And I have family members like that too, where they just love to be generous.

Speaker 4 And so I realize, you know what? I'm going to let go. If they want to spoil the grandkid or the niece, then that's what they're going to do.

Speaker 4 And, you know, I'm more like, I don't want more crap in my house. So don't get us physical things I have to then store and keep around.

Speaker 4 But other than that, there's just a piece of it where you go, this isn't my life, this isn't my finances, and I might have to deal with a fallout later.

Speaker 4 Because, like Jade said, you got to set the expectation. We're not going to cover you if you guys retire broke.
You're not going to move in with us and we're going to cover all your bills.

Speaker 4 So, get your crap together now. Yes.

Speaker 4 We're not the plan. Yes.
We are not your retirement plan.

Speaker 2 I love that. And you're approaching it from your side as opposed to pointing at them saying, You're not doing this and you're not doing this.
It just kind of takes the heat off.

Speaker 2 But those types of questions, George, they're always so tough because you love the person. You don't want to see them fall.
You don't want to see them fail.

Speaker 2 It kind of reminds me, we have a question from Facebook from Kristen, very similar.

Speaker 4 she says how do you stop grandparents from spoiling their grandkids again one party is spending in a way that another party doesn't like but it affects you so what do you do oh my goodness i mean you have a really hard conversation that's what i've done is just say hey listen we can't fit any more stuff in the house if you want to do something contribute to her 529 plan but please every time you come over you don't need to bring more cars and toys and things that i have to then deal with i know that's go give to goodwill six months from now.

Speaker 4 Yeah, I do that.

Speaker 2 You know, around Christmas time, I had to say that to my own grandparents of my kids. I was like, listen, you guys need to cool out.
Number one, they can't intake it all. It's too much on them.

Speaker 2 It's like stimulation overload. So I'm like, one thing, and please, for the love of God, can it just be one or two pieces?

Speaker 2 This business that has like 100 pieces and you got to have a box to keep it all in, and now I got to go buy Tupperware storage to hold all of those.

Speaker 4 I'm going to assemble it like IKEA furniture all weekend.

Speaker 2 No, thank you. Please, no more.

Speaker 4 I love you, parents and grandparents, but you got to chill out.

Speaker 2 You got to chill out. Public service announcement.

Speaker 4 Dave, we got a lot of calls on this show where life happens. One day someone's healthy, they're working, providing for their family, and then a curveball hits.

Speaker 1 You know, we hear it all the time: a car accident, a cancer diagnosis, a heart attack, and suddenly everything changes.

Speaker 4 Yeah, and that's why you've always said that having term life insurance from Xander is essential because it protects your family if the worst happens.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's right. You need 10 to 12 times your income in coverage.
No gimmicks, no whole life junk, just straightforward term-life protection.

Speaker 1 But there's another piece that people often overlook, and that's long-term disability insurance.

Speaker 4 Yeah, it's important to understand the difference between them. Life insurance steps in when you die.
Disability insurance steps in while you're alive, but can't work.

Speaker 4 So it replaces a large part of your income so the bills still get paid while you get back on your feet.

Speaker 1 Now, if your employer gives you free disability insurance, great, take it. If it's discounted there at a better price, take it.
But if not, Xander can help you find the right plan.

Speaker 1 Whether you're single or married, it's not optional. If you're going to be out of work for a while, then you need to make sure the money's still showing up.

Speaker 4 And that's why Xander is our go-to. They make it super simple to get the right coverage at the best price, no pressure, no upselling.

Speaker 1 I've trusted Jeff Zander and Xander Insurance for over 25 years, and so is my family.

Speaker 4 So don't wait. It's fast, it's easy, and it could make all the difference.
Go to xander.com or call call 800-356-4282.

Speaker 1 Protect yourself, protect your income, protect your family.

Speaker 2 All right, back to the phone lines. We've got Mike, who's in Oklahoma, where the wind comes sweeping down the plain.
You weren't expecting that. What's up, Mike?

Speaker 3 Hey, thanks for taking my call.

Speaker 3 So about, well, a few months ago in July, I got laid off and I'm 45. I've been in the oil field my whole life.
I don't know anything else. I'm having a hard time finding another career.

Speaker 3 And my question is.

Speaker 3 What do I do with my 401k? Should I roll it over into my IRA to have more freedom with that money? Or would that be a mistake?

Speaker 2 Well, it is smart to roll it over, but what do you mean when you say to have more freedom with that money? Because we don't want you unplugging the investment.

Speaker 3 Well, I don't want to do that either, but

Speaker 3 right now I'm under the umbrella of my former employee's plan, so I'm limited to what I can do with it. If I had to touch it, God forbid, you know, I'd be penalized and all that.

Speaker 3 And I don't know if, for tax purposes, if it would be smarter to roll it over, would I be paying taxes on that right away? Or would that be a test?

Speaker 4 No, the way to avoid all of this is a direct rollover. So you never actually withdraw the money.
It just straight gets transferred. So is it a traditional 401k?

Speaker 4 Yes. Okay.
So you'd want to do a direct rollover to a traditional IRA. Mm-hmm.

Speaker 3 Okay.

Speaker 4 And that, you know, I use the SmartVestor Pro for that. If you want to jump onto Ramseysolutions.com, get connected with one.

Speaker 4 They helped me with this and made it super simple to get all the right forms done, make sure the money gets moved without any issue or tax penalties, all of that. But I think it's a great idea to

Speaker 4 move it from the old employer because you're paying fees, you have no control over it, and you do have more control over the investments once it's in an IRA.

Speaker 4 Because now you're not beholden to whatever, you know, HR picked, the 14 funds. You have access to thousands.

Speaker 4 And so I would stick to good gross stock mutual funds, but at least you'll have all the options in the world once it's over in that IRA.

Speaker 2 So what about the job hunt? So you've been in oil all your life.

Speaker 2 Are you open to doing something different? What do you think, if you were to say, Jade, here's the problem, what do you think the problem is?

Speaker 2 That's a good question.

Speaker 3 Is it

Speaker 2 a bad interview? Is it I'm just not even getting into the interview? Is it

Speaker 3 opportunity?

Speaker 3 The oil field's all I know. And what I've learned in the last 20 years doesn't really translate to anything else.

Speaker 4 Well, I mean, would you consider the oil field a skilled trade?

Speaker 3 Yeah. Did you work on equipment?

Speaker 4 Yes. Okay.
I mean, you just, you just gave us your resume right there. You know how to use heavy equipment, right?

Speaker 4 Were you on the like maintenance side? Were you operating it?

Speaker 3 Maintenance, yeah. Okay.

Speaker 4 So now we know. You have a very clear field.
Industrial maintenance is a great field for you. And so I know it's scary because you go, well, if it's not oil, I don't know what I'm doing.

Speaker 4 But the truth is, you know a whole lot about what you're doing. It's just applying it to a new field.

Speaker 4 So have you actually looked into industrial maintenance tech type jobs, like whatever your title was, take the word oil out and then pop that into Google and see what kind of roles come up, see what kind of experience they're looking for, and then start applying with confidence saying, hey, I worked in the oil field for this long.

Speaker 4 I'm bringing this much experience. I think I can really serve you guys in this way.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I think George is right.

Speaker 2 I think you're capable of a lot more than what you really realize. All those skills are transferable.
And we see it. George and I see it.

Speaker 2 If you were employed this long, it means that you have value that you're able to add. So I really think it's more of a mental shift that you've got to have, that you have something to offer.

Speaker 2 And like George said, going in there with confidence, not,

Speaker 2 I probably won't get it because it's not oil. You know, I think you have to really work on that mindset.
Before we get off the line, we'll give you a couple of resources from Ken Coleman.

Speaker 2 We'll give you find the work you're wired to do. We'll give you from paycheck to purpose.
And I think that's really going to inspire you,

Speaker 2 like Ken would say to do work your wiretap how are you covering your bills right now

Speaker 3 I got some money saved up how much is left

Speaker 3 about

Speaker 4 five six thousand probably okay so it's running out pretty quick like in the next month or two

Speaker 4 correct are you single yes have you done any anything for income since July side jobs

Speaker 4 no

Speaker 2 so what stopped you from doing that because you know a lot of times you do have to do some sort of work in the in-between. Any job is good until you get the job.

Speaker 2 So what's stopping you from, you know, hitting up one of these, you know, order delivery places and filling some time there or going over to FedEx or, you know,

Speaker 4 any kind of retail work.

Speaker 4 Just something to avoid you depleting your savings to nothing. And then the next step is, well, I guess I got to go into debt, right? Do you have any debt right now?

Speaker 3 Just my house. Okay.
Good, good.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I'm worried about that because from the very beginning when you called in, it sounded like I think that somewhere in your mind, the plan is when this $5,000, $6,000 runs out, I'll be able to get my hands on that IRA and then I'll use that.

Speaker 2 I think that's living in your mind as your next option. And I want to eliminate that option.
completely off the table.

Speaker 2 Your next option is living off the paycheck that you're going to get because you're going to go down to Walmart or you're going to go down to Target or you're going to get anything where you can start supplementing and not drawing a full, you know month's income off of your savings.

Speaker 2 So what does that look like?

Speaker 2 I want to hear you brainstorm that. What does that look like for you over the weekend and over the next week? What do you think that you could

Speaker 2 start with?

Speaker 2 I am on a job hunt already.

Speaker 3 I haven't had any luck yet, like I said, but

Speaker 2 I understand for the major jobs. I'm talking about for the minors.

Speaker 2 What could you pick up that's just you filling that gap until you get the big job?

Speaker 3 I don't know. I haven't really thought about it like that.

Speaker 2 Yeah, that's, and I think that's what you need because

Speaker 2 when you do that, Mike, it's going to help with what I'm hearing right now, which is a lack of confidence. When you get any job, it's going to help you.

Speaker 2 It's going to give you something to do every morning. It's going to cause you to get up, you know, get out of the sweatpants and go do something.

Speaker 2 And then it gives you something to say, today today I'm going to do my best at this. And that does something for us internally.

Speaker 2 We're created to work and we're created to do, you know, use our talents. And when you have a long stretch, when you're not able to do that in any capacity, it does.

Speaker 2 It starts to wear on your emotions. It starts to wear on your, your self-worth, all of that.
And I can hear that in your voice. And you're too talented for that to happen.

Speaker 2 So that's, that's almost as important as getting a couple bucks in the door, right?

Speaker 2 It's just keeping your skills up, keeping your talent up, keeping your emotions and your confidence up because you are going to find another job.

Speaker 2 But what I don't want is for you to go in there and because you haven't utilized your skills in eight months, you know, I don't want you to be feeling less than or overly eager at the interview because all that shows too.

Speaker 2 Does that make sense?

Speaker 4 Yes. Calm, cool, confident.
So I would start looking. And what kind of jobs have you applied to?

Speaker 3 I have applied to some of the industrial maintenance type jobs, but

Speaker 3 I'm doing it online.

Speaker 3 If you don't hear nothing back, it's not like the old days, you know, when you go put a paper application in and go talk to you. Oh, sure.
Face to face.

Speaker 4 Well, do you know people in the industry and you let them know, hey, I'm looking for these types of roles. If you know something, hit me up.

Speaker 3 Not really. I try to.

Speaker 4 I would be contacting everybody adjacent to the industrial maintenance oil world and just see what's available.

Speaker 4 Even if it's not the ideal thing, at least something for now to get your foot in the door. And then they go, oh my gosh, you're way too qualified.

Speaker 4 We got to get you in a different role where you can really use your skills. So that's the goal.
That's what I would be doing if I was in your shoes and I know nothing about this field.

Speaker 4 You are far more talented than me. So I know you got it in you.
And I think right now, just, you know, applying online and hoping for the best is not going to do it. You got to be out there.

Speaker 4 You got to be texting people, meeting with people, talking to people, and drumming up business, going, I need to be top of mind when someone has that open role. And Ken's books will help do that.

Speaker 4 I'm going to send you the proximity principle as well. This is the Ken Coleman package right here.
It is. Everything we got.
We're going to throw it at you.

Speaker 2 So two pieces of homework.

Speaker 2 You know, obviously the resources we give you are going to help you, but if you don't do anything else, number one is, yeah, get on Uber Eats, get on DoorDash, something that you can just get out there, make a little bit of money.

Speaker 2 I mean, it's not going to bring, it's not going to replace your income, but it'll do something. And that's going to be so important.
for you.

Speaker 2 And number two, I want you to make a list of everybody you know that has done a job that you've done or knows somebody who's done the job or has done something adjacent to the job. Make a list.

Speaker 2 I want you to come up with at least 15 names and then I want you to hit the phones and I want you to call them.

Speaker 3 Don't text them.

Speaker 2 Call them up and have a conversation with them.

Speaker 4 This is a sales job and today you are selling Mike. That's the goal.

Speaker 1 I love entrepreneurs. Don't forget, guys, I started my company on a card table myself.
So I know what it's like to have people counting on you, your team, your family, not to mention your customers.

Speaker 1 And when you're the one signing the paychecks, you can't afford to fly blind.

Speaker 1 But I'll be honest, early on, one thing that nearly sunk us was wasting time with spreadsheets that didn't add up because business units didn't talk to each other. I finally told my team, just fix it.

Speaker 1 And they did. We got NetSuite.
That was years ago, and we've never looked back. See, NetSuite isn't just for tech giants.
It's built for growing businesses like yours.

Speaker 1 Over 43,000 businesses already run on NetSuite, including a lot that started just like you. And now with built-in AI, NetSuite is helping them even more.

Speaker 1 It's one system connected to every part of your business for real-time insights, not guesswork. NetSuite AI flags inventory issues, cash flow risks, even supplier delays before they become problems.

Speaker 1 So you can trust the data, stop wasting time, and make the right decisions faster. Take a free product tour today at netsuite.com/slash Ramsey.
That's netsuite.com/slash Ramsey.

Speaker 2 Well, if you've been listening to this show and you like what you hear, or maybe you watch on YouTube and you like what you see and you like what you hear, be sure to let us know and let the people know.

Speaker 2 Share the show if you can.

Speaker 2 Like the show if you can, subscribe to the show if you can. All of that is.

Speaker 3 I believe in you.

Speaker 2 I believe in you.

Speaker 2 it's easy to do these days very capable it is easy there's that little paper airplane or you can just click the copy copy link copy and paste it shoot it to somebody it's a great way to share the content help change some lives and it helps us out a little bit too george yeah what a weird emoji that like why in a paper airplane

Speaker 2 for a kid oh like send notes to people in class well i didn't do that i would just hand them over but that's what i'm saying like nobody used a paper airplane to like send messages that's a good point i don't know maybe it's like i digress maybe it's a Federal Express reference.

Speaker 4 Who even says Federal Express? You're really showing your age.

Speaker 2 I'm talking about from Castaway.

Speaker 3 Oh, okay.

Speaker 4 I was like, do people call FedEx Federal Express?

Speaker 2 It's a very loose connection here.

Speaker 3 You're secretly a boomer.

Speaker 4 Reveal yourself.

Speaker 2 Oh, boy. Let's go to Nathan, who's in West Virginia.
What's going on, Nathan?

Speaker 3 Hi, thanks for taking my call.

Speaker 2 Of course. What's going on?

Speaker 3 Okay, well, let me tell you my situation, then I'll see. My question is, if you guys have any financial solutions that I'm not thinking of.

Speaker 3 So, I have an aunt who's almost 89 years old, and about 15 months ago, I got added to her checking account. I handle all of her finances, make sure all of her bills are paid.

Speaker 3 And up until July, everything was going good. So, her total income is about $2,200 a month.

Speaker 3 And I'm going to estimate that her bills, including utilities, groceries, everything, maybe $1,800 or $1,900 a month.

Speaker 3 So, she doesn't have much left over, but she did have enough to cover her expenses. Well, then, starting in July, starting in July, we're paying caregivers 24-7.

Speaker 3 So I write checks every week to caregivers, but we're paying about $2,400 a month just in caregiving expenses. So the only way we've even been able to pay for it, we've been selling assets.

Speaker 3 We've been selling her cars. But

Speaker 3 I'm estimating she's going to run completely out of money probably in April or May. So I'd been thinking, well, what other options can I do? And her house is all paid for.

Speaker 3 So one option I had thought of was a reverse mortgage. Well, then I looked online.

Speaker 3 She lives in a 1973 manufactured double-wide mobile home online that said you can't get a reverse mortgage if the mobile home was built before 1976, because that's when HUD started renting.

Speaker 2 That's fine. I don't want you to do that anyway.
So we can go to the next one.

Speaker 3 And then I thought, well, maybe home equity loan, but I called a couple places.

Speaker 3 But, you know, when you take her income of $2,200 against maybe $1,800 of monthly expenses, but then add in $2,400 of caregiving. So now you're over 4,000 expenses against 2,200 income.

Speaker 3 So nobody's probably going to even loan money on her house when the debt's income. So I can't think really of any other options that she's going to run out of money in the next several months.

Speaker 2 How much is the house worth if you were to sell it?

Speaker 3 It's just a total estimate. And again, it's a manufactured house.
I'm going to say it does have about one and a half acres of land with it out in the country.

Speaker 3 I'm going to just estimate maybe 60 or 70,000.

Speaker 2 Okay. And then what about with the land? Is that including the land with it?

Speaker 3 Yeah, that's just a total guess on my part. We haven't had any appraisal.

Speaker 2 And you said it's $2,400 for care. And have you priced out, what if she had just like a single-bedroom apartment in West Virginia? What would that cost?

Speaker 3 I'm going to say, I mean, it's going to depend on the area. I'm going to guess you could probably get something for $1,000.

Speaker 2 $1,000. Okay.

Speaker 2 There might be a situation where you've got to move her and invest this nest egg and kind of draw off of it what you can. Is it just you, or do you have siblings that are helping with this?

Speaker 3 Well, I have a sibling, but I'm pretty much doing it. Yeah, my siblings not helping me, so not much.

Speaker 4 Would she qualify for Medicaid that would help cover the cost of caregiving?

Speaker 3 Well, I had checked into that just very briefly

Speaker 3 on the internet. It just said something about if a single person made, I think, over,

Speaker 3 I thought it said $900 and something a month, although that sounds kind of low, but if she makes more than that,

Speaker 3 I had also thought about calling in West Virginia. I forget what it's called, but there's a senior services number through the state.

Speaker 3 I thought about calling to see if there's any other options that I don't know about. My main options that I considered was the reverse mortgage or a home equity loan.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I would rather you look into the care options than debt options.

Speaker 2 I think what George is saying is that that's a better avenue for you to look into if there's Medicaid or if there's any sort of state program there in West Virginia that can help.

Speaker 2 And then the other thought is, yeah, trying to get your hands on some of this money. What's her health like?

Speaker 3 Pretty good. My uncle, which is her brother, thinks that she has dementia.
We don't know for sure. She's taking a test, I guess, next month that will determine that.

Speaker 3 But other than that, I mean, she's had some brain cancer issues, but she physically still gets around, still walks.

Speaker 3 Now, she quit driving probably about a year ago, but physically she does pretty good for almost 89 years old.

Speaker 4 Well, I would have a game plan. Let's assume that she lives a long life and goes to 99.
Well, what's our 10-year plan to take care of this if nothing else changes and the expenses stay?

Speaker 4 So, that's, I would be kind of planning for that worst-case scenario of covering these expenses for a long time. And that might mean you're pitching in to cover some of the gap.

Speaker 4 Are you able to do that?

Speaker 3 Yeah, I would be able to. And I actually even considered

Speaker 3 getting a home equity loan.

Speaker 3 And then myself and I thought, well, but then if she ended up going nurse at home and we lost the house, there'd be no way to even repay her.

Speaker 4 Yeah, we can't do debt. I would just take debt off the table as an option.

Speaker 4 I would rather you sell her place and invest that $70,000 or even put it in a high-yield savings account and utilize all of that money until that runs out, which will get you pretty far.

Speaker 4 I mean, that's years of, you know, a few years of covering her expenses.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 I think today,

Speaker 2 like I said, you chase down and see what Medicaid will do, what the state will do.

Speaker 2 And there might be something that you can find there. But in the near term, you need money because you said this is going to run out out soon.

Speaker 2 And that $70,000 invested, it's not a ton, but it'll give you something. And if you can, you know, park it in an index fund and really only draw what you need.

Speaker 2 And if you and your brother or you and your other sibling can get together and kind of fill those holes,

Speaker 2 that's really all you've got right now. And it's one of those things, you know, John would say, not by, not by my hand, but in my lap.
And this has just got set in your lap to deal with. And

Speaker 2 it sucks.

Speaker 4 Is there a scenario where she could move in with you or the sibling?

Speaker 3 I know even my, even my mom and dad had even offered before about her moving in with them.

Speaker 3 She didn't want to, and my uncle, which is her brother, I was thinking he may have even said something, but she didn't act like she, she's lived in the same house since 1973.

Speaker 3 She understood, but she doesn't have a choice.

Speaker 4 Yeah, respectfully, she's between a rock and a hard place here. So she's not going to have the choice when she doesn't have the money to live.

Speaker 4 And so

Speaker 4 it's probably going to come down to that because either you pay for her rent or she lives with family. I think those are the only options at this point

Speaker 4 if her Social Security is not going to cut it and you need to keep paying these caregivers.

Speaker 4 So I would do my homework and uncover every stone to see what I can find out about getting her care that isn't $2,400 a month.

Speaker 3 Okay. Okay.

Speaker 4 There's no easy answers here. The only easy thing to do would be go into debt, and that's a terrible, terrible solution.

Speaker 2 Can you tell me when you said that's $1,900 for her bills,

Speaker 2 what's that $1,900 in bills? What is that?

Speaker 3 Well, she has three loan payments. So one is $244 a month, one is $200, and then one is $100,

Speaker 3 and then the rest of them are just her utilities,

Speaker 3 food, electricity.

Speaker 4 What are these loan payments?

Speaker 3 One of them was for several years ago. She'd got one of those outside generators that if your power goes off,

Speaker 3 and then these were all, most of these are bad. That was to a finance company.

Speaker 3 The interest rate on that loan is almost 26%.

Speaker 4 What's the total balance of her debts?

Speaker 3 Well, it's not too bad now because I've been trying to pay him down as much as I can. So the total of all of her debt combined is probably about

Speaker 3 $5,400, a little over $5,000. Okay.

Speaker 4 Yeah, I would try to clear that and get out of your life. And if worse comes to worse, I'd cover her four walls before paying these bills and let it go to collections if need be.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 3 And I have been trying to pay him down with extra. About a year ago, those three loans were about $14,000.
Now they're down to about $5,000 and something.

Speaker 4 I might have a conversation with family and go, hey, hey, can we all chip in and get rid of this debt? Because that would really let her breathe a little bit with her current income and expenses.

Speaker 4 Yeah. That'd buy you guys some time.

Speaker 3 Yeah. That's man.

Speaker 2 That's the best you're going to be able to do with this.

Speaker 2 Guys,

Speaker 2 cautionary tale, man. This is what it is.
The time does come for all of us where we age and we get to the point where we can no longer work and we get to the point to where we need money coming in.

Speaker 2 So please, please, please do not put off important things like paying off your debt. Pay off your your debt now when you're young and you can work extra and you can do all these things.

Speaker 2 Take advantage of compounding interest now when you can invest. Invest 15% of your income.
The day is going to come.

Speaker 4 Please do not rely on Social Security. This is it.
This is what happens. It's we call it social insecurity for a reason.
It's simply not enough to survive.

Speaker 1 Let's face it, health insurance today is more complicated than ever. The system isn't built to help the average person understand, and it leaves too many families unprotected.

Speaker 1 That's why you need my friends at Health Trust Financial. They aren't just brokers, they're trusted health insurance advisors who have been helping families like yours for over 20 years.

Speaker 1 You don't have to navigate it alone.

Speaker 1 The experts at Health Trust Financial listen to your needs, work to understand your family's situation and budget, then help you choose the health insurance plan that's right for you.

Speaker 1 That's why they're Ramsey Trusted and why we've worked with them for two decades. Look, medical debt is the number one cause of bankruptcy in America today.

Speaker 1 One hospital visit can wipe out your savings and undo all your hard work. So health insurance isn't optional.
It's part of your financial defense plan.

Speaker 1 Health Trust Financial knows their stuff, and they're the only health insurance provider I recommend.

Speaker 1 So, get clear about health insurance plans and get the coverage that's right for you at healthtrustfinancial.com.

Speaker 2 All right, everybody, hip hip, hooray. The all-new Every Dollar is here.
And now it's way more than just a world-class budgeting app. It can do everything.

Speaker 2 There's a ton of advanced features to help make your progress with money even faster, even easier. As a matter of fact, the average person is finding thousands of dollars in just the first 15 minutes.

Speaker 2 So if you're interested, which you should be, you can start every dollar for free today.

Speaker 2 You can get it in the app store or as always on Google Play all right Mary's in Columbus Ohio hey Mary what's going on in your world

Speaker 3 hey there thanks so much for taking my call

Speaker 3 I I would love so I just started really binging all the podcasts and all the things awesome

Speaker 3 and yeah

Speaker 3 and I am not a math lady

Speaker 3 at all.

Speaker 3 So I would, and I've done all my numbers, I have, and I I would love for you guys as math people to give me the Ramsey goal for those numbers as far as like a year or two years, however, that I can set

Speaker 3 to get myself out of debt.

Speaker 2 Well, you called the right person. You called George Camel because I was like, I'm ready.

Speaker 4 I got my calculator. I'm pushing my glasses up.
I'm ready to go.

Speaker 3 Oh, good.

Speaker 4 Okay, lay it out for us. How much debt do you have?

Speaker 3 All right.

Speaker 3 I have about $60,000.

Speaker 4 Okay, break it down.

Speaker 3 Okay.

Speaker 3 It's in the Ramsey order. It's about $316

Speaker 3 in like a pay-in-for situation for my bank from Chase. Oh, man.

Speaker 2 Why not pay later?

Speaker 3 Yeah, they'll reimburse you into your account and you pay them back.

Speaker 3 Then I have

Speaker 3 $450,000 on one credit card,

Speaker 3 $1,900 on the other credit card.

Speaker 3 I do own my car, so no car payment there, and then the rest of it is school debt.

Speaker 2 Oh my gosh. Wow.
So are those all broken out?

Speaker 3 $1,000.

Speaker 3 There's $1,000

Speaker 3 that I found on my credit report that is in collection. So I was thinking of paying like 10 cents on the dollar or something for that.

Speaker 2 But anyway, sorry, go ahead. $57,000 of student loan debt.

Speaker 3 Yeah, that's all right. Okay.

Speaker 4 And what do you make?

Speaker 3 $45.

Speaker 4 $45,000.

Speaker 3 What kind of work is that? What kind of work do you do?

Speaker 3 I work as a print project manager at my church. Okay.
And have done so for many, many years.

Speaker 2 Is print, is like print your focus or is ministry your focus? Like what's what's the thing you want to do most?

Speaker 2 It's

Speaker 3 I believe in what my church says. And I, when I started, I have, you know, I have a history of emotional problems.
They never fired me, all the problems that I'm sure I caused.

Speaker 3 So I have a deep loyalty. It's not really ministry as in, I want to do ministry.
And no. Well, I don't.
I do not have a passion for print. I just asked so that we can get your church.

Speaker 2 I just asked because we're going to be thinking of ways to get your income up. And I wanted to know where your heart is.

Speaker 2 If your heart is, I want to do something in helping people, ministry like that related, or if you're like, I love print and digital work and all that kind of stuff.

Speaker 4 I heard project manager and I went, ding, ding, ding, we can make a lot of money in project management with your skill set if you're willing to look outside of the church for full-time work.

Speaker 4 Now, you can still be heavily involved in your church. It just may not be full-time employment long-term.

Speaker 3 Just because we're doing

Speaker 3 math.

Speaker 3 Volunteer.

Speaker 2 Yeah, we're doing math. There's two factors here.
George is going to walk you through one, but when we're looking at an equation like this, we say there's two major things we can do.

Speaker 2 We can lower our expenses, right? And that's lowering our outgo every single month. It's stopping things like investing in our 401k.
It's stopping too much withholding coming out of our check. Right.

Speaker 2 So those are all ways that we're kind of lowering our expenses. And then the other side of it, Mary, is we've got to get more money coming in.
And for you, 45,000,

Speaker 2 get more coming in.

Speaker 2 So let's talk about two timelines. Cause as it is now, George, I mean.

Speaker 4 Yeah, what can you actually put towards the debt per month right now? Can you put 500 or 1,000? Give us a number of what you can throw at the debt snowman.

Speaker 3 Right.

Speaker 3 And actually, the not math part of me has got to back up because I do have

Speaker 3 an act, I have acting gigs that I do already, and I've started door dashing. Great.
So I do have more numbers. So it's just a little bit more.

Speaker 2 But tell us this: after you've paid the minimums on all your bills, all your expenses, how much extra do you put on your smallest debt every month?

Speaker 3 About 1,

Speaker 3 no, wait, wait, wait. Okay, so help me.
One is 75, one is 25, one is 35, one is 75. That's how much.

Speaker 2 So you're not doing the snowball in that you're not making minimum payments on everything and then putting all extra money on one debt?

Speaker 3 I

Speaker 3 need to be doing any extra money on the smallest debt yet because I just started the binge. I just started the

Speaker 4 currently with your income, you can't put any extra toward it. It's just barely covering your bills with your income.
Yeah, basically.

Speaker 3 Okay. See, that's the part where I go.

Speaker 4 So think about it this way. If you continue at the church full-time and you get a little bit of extra money, you'd be lucky to get out of debt in six, seven years.
Is that accurate?

Speaker 3 I mean, I'm asking you. Well, I mean, think about it.

Speaker 4 If you put it right a thousand a month would take you 60 months. That's five years.
If you were able to do a thousand months total toward your debts. So think about this.

Speaker 4 If you did 500, it's going to take double the amount of time. Talking 10 years.
And so based on what you're doing, it's over a decade.

Speaker 4 And so that's where I want you to have the urgency of, I need to get my income up yesterday, like double my income.

Speaker 4 And so that's where you need to get a project management job that pays 60 or 70 and do the side work. And then we can clean this up within a year or two.

Speaker 3 Okay.

Speaker 2 The good news is, the good news is you know how to live off of $40,000, $45,000 a year gross.

Speaker 2 So anything you get, if you can double that, knowing that you can live on such a fringe, like shoestring budget is so good for you.

Speaker 2 And I want to flip that so that you feel motivated by that and not kind of like overwhelmed by that.

Speaker 2 If you can double your income by finding a higher paying job and adding a side hustle, which I believe you can, I believe you can get to 80

Speaker 2 quickly.

Speaker 2 That means all of a sudden I'm doing this in a year and a half. I'm doing it in 18 months as opposed to the crazy timeframe that you were on before.

Speaker 4 Yeah. So here's your nerd napkin math.
If you can throw 2,000 total at your debts, you're done with this thing in two and a half years.

Speaker 3 Okay.

Speaker 4 If you can throw 2,500 at it, you're done in two years. And so you can see the math, it sort of just kind of contracts and expands as you're able to throw more at it.

Speaker 4 So the more margin we create, the faster you're done and the faster you can get to the more fun parts of life, like building wealth, having breathing room, going on vacation, upgrading the car in cash, all that good stuff.

Speaker 4 And so I love that you appreciate your church and that they've been very good to you, but I fear that this also leaves you stressed and broke for a decade.

Speaker 4 Well,

Speaker 3 I have my numbers now and my goals. And I mean,

Speaker 3 that's going to be my job to work all that out. That's right.

Speaker 2 Project management.

Speaker 3 We had the easy buzzword.

Speaker 4 We told you, hey, get more money. And so now you have the hard job of actually going to do all that.
But I have full confidence.

Speaker 4 You start applying to project management roles and your skills are going to transfer perfectly

Speaker 3 and so I would sharpen up that resume and this is not a knock at your church I'm sure it's wonderful but right now you're in a different season yeah and they're probably limited in what they could pay you you know and you need to get out there and they don't believe in debt either so okay there you go you know I love I mean very they're wonderful wonderful

Speaker 3 actually

Speaker 2 it was great to have that opportunity bring me on to Dave Ramsey

Speaker 2 That's fantastic. That's fantastic.

Speaker 4 Hey, you know what? I'm going to send you every dollar as our gift to you to help you put all these numbers out.

Speaker 4 It's like George in your pocket doing the math, giving recommendations 24-7, encouraging you based on your personal situation. So hang on the list.

Speaker 2 Can it be Jade in the pocket too?

Speaker 4 Yeah, but

Speaker 4 just

Speaker 3 let me have my fun. I fit better at math and I fit better in pockets.

Speaker 4 That's just the truth.

Speaker 3 I'm fine-sized. Yeah.

Speaker 4 I'm a little guy. It's one of my only spiritual gifts.

Speaker 2 It's fitting in pockets.

Speaker 2 But honestly, guys, let's talk seriously about every dollar. If you don't have it or maybe you've tried it before,

Speaker 2 you need to get into the all-new every Every Dollar. It has changed so much, George, over the past, I mean, even just six to eight months.
It's completely new. It's got everything you need.

Speaker 2 It's not just a budgeting app anymore. It has everything you need to walk the Ramsey plan the Ramsey way.
So, I know there's plenty of times where you're looking, you're like, What do I do next?

Speaker 2 I've just paid off my debt. What am I supposed to do? Is it three months or is it six months of expenses? Why is it three versus six?

Speaker 2 All those questions that you have, all you have to do is load in your information and do that onboarding, and it is going to walk with you step by step so that you can accomplish your goals faster.

Speaker 2 Get into it.

Speaker 1 Traditional home security systems don't stop someone from entering your home. They only react once someone is already inside.
That's too late. Real security should stop a crime before it even starts.

Speaker 1 And that's why I only trust SimplySafe home security because they take action while a criminal is still outside your home.

Speaker 1 When someone suspicious steps onto your property, SimplySafe's AI security cameras identify the potential threat and alert their professional monitoring agents.

Speaker 1 The agents can then confront the criminal and, if they need to, trigger sirens and spotlights and dispatch the police. And unlike other systems, you don't have to confront the intruder yourself.

Speaker 1 With SimplySafe's 24-7 monitoring agents, it's like having a security guard stationed right outside your home.

Speaker 1 And with a 60-day money-back guarantee and no long-term contracts, more than 4 million Americans trust SimplySafe to keep their homes and families safe every day.

Speaker 1 Right now, get 50% off your new system at simply safe direct.com. That's simply safe direct.com.
There's no safe like simply safe.

Speaker 2 All right, welcome back to the Ramsey Show. We're here in the Fair Ones Credit Union studio, continuing to take calls about your life and money.
George Camill is still next to me.

Speaker 4 Can't stop, won't stop. Can't stop it.

Speaker 2 I'm Jade Warshaw. Going straight to the phone lines, George, where we have Shelby in Missouri.

Speaker 3 Hey, Shelby, what's going on today?

Speaker 3 Hey, I am just,

Speaker 3 I just had some questions and struggling, but

Speaker 3 so.

Speaker 3 I've been trying to follow the baby steps program, you know, to save thousands and a thousand and then you pay off, you know, the deaths you have by the shortest,

Speaker 3 like the least amount you know um i just turned eight to in august and i've been with my fiancé for almost two years um

Speaker 3 and i have a lot of debt to pay off already and i'm not sure how to do it and how to get my fiancé on board um he seems to think he can't save any money until all his debt is paid off um i think it's just the mindset he's in but you said he can't can't save any money until all his debt is paid off, so he's not wanting to do baby step one, which is save $1,000?

Speaker 3 Right. Okay.
Right.

Speaker 4 And how much debt does he have?

Speaker 4 He has about

Speaker 3 two thousand one hundred and sixty-nine dollars.

Speaker 2 Okay, and when how much do you have?

Speaker 2 Um

Speaker 3 twenty-six thousand three hundred and eighteen.

Speaker 2 What kind of debt is that?

Speaker 3 Mainly my car. Um I was getting ready to graduate in May, and I had a pizza junk car, and it had gotten me through.

Speaker 3 And I was going to travel to

Speaker 3 Des Moines, which was like an hour and a half from where we were living, and my car would not make it that far.

Speaker 3 So my mom, he went to an Eson dealer, and she signed on a car for me that I am making the payments of, but since I was not 18 at the time, it is in her name.

Speaker 4 It's completely in her name. So she took all the risk, and you're making like Venmo payments to her to then cover the payment.

Speaker 4 Well,

Speaker 3 the account, I made the account

Speaker 3 that it automatically comes out of my checking.

Speaker 2 How much do you pay her every month for the car? Or how much do you pay every month for it?

Speaker 3 I think it's 14 or 417, but I round up to 420 every month.

Speaker 2 Okay. So

Speaker 3 since I'm 18, my insurance is out of whack.

Speaker 2 How much money do you earn? What's your monthly income? Just you?

Speaker 2 Just me. It was

Speaker 2 about

Speaker 3 $1,800.

Speaker 2 Why did you say past 10? And

Speaker 3 we moved closer to my fiancé's work. He was spending $250 in gas every two weeks.
And

Speaker 3 we moved. He's now 10 minutes away.
But I'm currently unemployed. I'm going stir crazy because I want to work, but we're in such a small town.
There's nowhere really around.

Speaker 3 I've applied at jobs, called to try to produce my application. Work from home, call service.

Speaker 3 Yep. I applied for

Speaker 3 customer service, Rec.

Speaker 3 He works at

Speaker 3 a hog barn. Okay.
What does he make?

Speaker 3 $19.50 an hour.

Speaker 2 What does that amount to every month? What does he take home? Every month for him,

Speaker 3 $2,600. Okay.
And then together it was like $4,200. So we were doing pretty good.

Speaker 4 And you guys have you combined finances?

Speaker 3 No, no. Okay.
Are you living together?

Speaker 3 Yes, we are.

Speaker 2 Okay.

Speaker 3 How much is Richard?

Speaker 3 It is

Speaker 3 $650. Utilities are $225,

Speaker 3 no matter what. Okay.

Speaker 2 So

Speaker 2 you called for one thing, but I can't just, you know, move past something like you didn't say what you just said. So you're, you're very exposed right now, Shelby.
You're because you don't work.

Speaker 2 So you're right now depending on someone to take care of you. Essentially, you're in a house that another person's paying for.
You have a car that's not in your name.

Speaker 2 That at any point, somebody could say, you know what?

Speaker 2 Say again.

Speaker 2 It's just very overwhelming. It is.
And so I want to get you, I want you to be in a safer space for you, especially at 18.

Speaker 2 I want you to be in a position where you can work.

Speaker 2 When's the wedding?

Speaker 3 We were planning on just us two going maybe next year, just going

Speaker 3 to Vegas or Hawaii or whatever.

Speaker 2 You can't afford to go to Vegas or Hawaii.

Speaker 2 And why I'm going to hit you with this. I'm hitting you with a a lot of questions.
What would be the point in waiting so long

Speaker 2 versus getting going to the courthouse?

Speaker 2 This has been your fiancé for two years.

Speaker 4 Everything has been a rush. I'm going to rush to move to my fiancé, a rush to move across the country with this guy.
And now we're going to take our sweet time with the wedding.

Speaker 2 What's your family say? Yeah. What's your family saying?

Speaker 3 I know my stepdad made a joke of like, go to the courthouse. It's free on Thursdays.
I'm like, I'm okay with that. Okay.

Speaker 3 But I think my fiancé wants to do something, like experience something new for the both of us. And all your family.

Speaker 4 She's about to experience living in the hog barn if you guys don't take care of business here. I mean, you're still like children.

Speaker 4 But we're living like adults too fast, too soon. And you have a $26,000 car that is not in your name and you can't even make the payment.

Speaker 4 So I would have a lot of urgency, number one, to get rid of this car. You do not need a $26,000 car in a town that doesn't even have a stoplight.

Speaker 2 You can't, you can't keep the car.

Speaker 2 And my biggest thing,

Speaker 2 I asked about your family because I want to know, is everybody on board with you getting married?

Speaker 2 If they are, the people that love you and that you trust, if they're saying, hey, we like this guy, we're wondering when you're getting married, then I am too.

Speaker 2 And I would say get it done sooner than later so that you can protect yourself. Because what happens here,

Speaker 2 Shelby, if this goes bad, George and I get the calls all the time. So, and it leaves you on the line to dry because there's no legality protecting you in any way.

Speaker 2 So, if this guy loves you, let's go ahead and, let's go ahead and, let's go ahead and get married.

Speaker 2 And then in a year from now, you guys can have a great trip in Hawaii or Las Vegas if you can afford it, pay cash. But today,

Speaker 2 let's start the building blocks of getting this foundation a lot more firm than it is right now. And that starts with you guys solidifying.
a union there, getting married.

Speaker 2 That way, legally, it's cool for you guys to go ahead and combine your finances. Everybody's way more protected that way.

Speaker 2 Then, the next thing, thing too, is now I can go get a job and I can feel good about bringing this check home and us together paying off our debt and walking through those steps.

Speaker 2 So, that's that's thing, the two things that you need to sit down and talk with.

Speaker 2 I don't know your fiancé's name, Trent, talk with Trent tonight about that, okay?

Speaker 2 Okay.

Speaker 4 And the other piece of this is he's saying he can't afford to cover his $2,000 in debt. Is that right?

Speaker 3 No, he we're kind of tackling it together.

Speaker 4 You said your finances are separate. Together with what money?

Speaker 3 You don't have a job.

Speaker 3 Right. So I had some money in my checking account and he had a credit card payment that was coming up because when you got paid.

Speaker 4 Why would you pay someone else's debt when you're not married to them?

Speaker 4 He was paying the car payment. So you guys are just debt swapping?

Speaker 3 No, I I don't know. Like, I find another problem is like

Speaker 3 when we were bringing income, like the $4,200 every month, is when stuff comes out during the month. It's not a money problem.

Speaker 3 Show me, it's not, you're right.

Speaker 2 It's not a money problem.

Speaker 2 The problem is you guys love each other. I get it, but

Speaker 2 you both have it twisted. You're getting everything out of order and it's getting real tangled up and really confused.
Do the two things I said: you need to get married and you need to get a job.

Speaker 5 You've worked hard to control your money. You've been budgeting with intention, building a plan, and creating a secure future for your family.

Speaker 5 But there's one area most people forget to protect, their online data.

Speaker 5 So I use delete me because, y'all, data data brokers collect and post personal information like your home address, phone number, and even your kids' school's info. They do it without your permission.

Speaker 5 And once it's out there, it can be used by scammers, AI spam tools, and other people that you would never want to have access to your life.

Speaker 2 So think about it.

Speaker 5 You wouldn't hand that info to a stranger at the grocery store. So why let it sit there online for anyone to find it? Well, Delete Me helps you take control back.

Speaker 5 Their team of real live privacy privacy experts finds your exposed info, removes it from sketchy websites, and makes sure that it stays gone.

Speaker 5 Then they send you a report so that you know exactly what they've taken care of. So protect your peace and the life that you're working so hard to build.

Speaker 5 Right now, Ramsey listeners get 20% off at joindeleteme.com/slash Ramsey with code Ramsey at checkout.

Speaker 2 Do it today.

Speaker 5 That's joindeleteme.com/slash Ramsey and code Ramsey.

Speaker 2 Welcome back to the Ramsey Show and back to Daniel, who's in Rhode Island. What's up, Daniel? How can we help today?

Speaker 3 Hi, guys. How are you doing? We're great.

Speaker 3 That's awesome. So

Speaker 3 the short version of my question is,

Speaker 3 how do I know if making a huge career change is the best thing for mine and my family's future? Yeah. And then I'll go ahead and give you the backstory.

Speaker 3 So I am in the final stages of the hiring process for what is essentially my dream job. It's something that I've always felt like I wanted to do.

Speaker 3 Pay-wise, it would be basically paying me the same as what I'm currently making starting off, but there is definitely a huge potential for raises and growth within the first few years.

Speaker 3 However, the big question mark for me and my wife is that it would also require us to relocate to a major city in the Northeast, probably either New York or Boston.

Speaker 3 I

Speaker 3 like my current job. I'm not positive, though, that it's something that I will be passionate about in the long term.

Speaker 3 However, my boss and I have developed a really, really good relationship.

Speaker 3 And

Speaker 3 she's basically told me that should I choose to remain working with them, that she would like to groom me to take over her position within the next few years.

Speaker 4 Is that your dream job? To take hers?

Speaker 3 No, it is not.

Speaker 4 Then I think it's the wrong next move.

Speaker 4 It's cool and it's nice to be. I mean, it feels good.
You're flattered, like, there's room for growth here. I like it.
They're treating me well.

Speaker 4 But at the end of the day, it's going to, there's a soul tax to be paid, knowing there's this other thing over here that you want to experience.

Speaker 4 And so I don't think either of them are bad, but I think you're not going to regret taking this new leap. And here's the good news: nothing is fatal.
fatal.

Speaker 4 Let's say you move to Boston, you take the next gig, you do it for a year or two, and you realize, well, I guess my dream job, this ain't it either. Or I want to do this job, but it's somewhere else.

Speaker 4 You have the freedom to make that jump too.

Speaker 2 Let me add another layer into it. I'll probably be devil's advocate here.

Speaker 2 So tell us about your family. How old are your kids? Tell us about your community.
Tell us on that side of things.

Speaker 3 Yeah, so that is kind of like the thing that makes it complicated for me because I know myself and I know that like if I was single and everything, like I already know the choice that I would make.

Speaker 3 But you'd be gone.

Speaker 3 I am recently married. My wife and I are wanting to have kids within the next few years and we have a really, really good support system where we currently live.
My wife is also

Speaker 3 really well established in her job right now and is probably going to get promoted within the next year if she stays there as well.

Speaker 3 So that's really where the big question mark comes into play for me.

Speaker 3 And her job won't transition.

Speaker 4 She can't stick with the company and she can't find something related in the new city that pays her.

Speaker 3 She can find something related, but I think that it would be a lot more of a headache.

Speaker 3 And I think that it would just like set her back more in her career than where she currently wants where she's currently projecting to go to, I guess.

Speaker 2 What does she say when you tell her about the opportunity? Is she like, honey, you have to take it? Or is she like, oh man, I mean, I want this for you, but it really is tough. What's her demand?

Speaker 3 More so the latter. She has said that she will support me and

Speaker 3 commit it to me if it is what I decide to do. But for the sake of her own preference, she has expressed that she would prefer to stay where we are.

Speaker 2 What about financially?

Speaker 2 How are you guys doing? Do you need the money? Tell us about that. Are you in debt? And this would really, you know, push you forward.
Tell us more more about that part.

Speaker 3 Yeah, so it's really hard to say, truthfully.

Speaker 3 I think that it would increase our cost of living, definitely, were we to relocate, but I do think that this new job also brings the opportunity to earn additional income because there are pay raises that are basically guaranteed over the first couple of years.

Speaker 3 And it also gives me the opportunity to earn overtime as well in this new field.

Speaker 3 And is this like a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity?

Speaker 4 Is this dream job still going to be there two years from now?

Speaker 3 Really hard to say. So it's a government job.
I'll say that now.

Speaker 3 So it really is kind of dependent on what like the political atmosphere is and everything, whether or not it sticks around.

Speaker 2 Interesting. You know,

Speaker 3 I...

Speaker 2 I will tell you as a person who's moved across the country for a job,

Speaker 2 it is all these things weigh heavily on your decision. And what I can tell you as your friend is both you and your wife need to have peace about it.
That's thing number one.

Speaker 2 Like money and all that stuff aside, once you do feel like you've landed on something, both people need to feel like, okay, like peace about it. And I mean, I don't know.

Speaker 2 I'm just talking to you like a friend right now. I'm the type of person I would pray the prayer.
I'm like, God, make it so clear. Like make it like 90, I want a 90-10 decision.

Speaker 2 I don't want a 50-50, right? 50-50 is like, well, I kind of feel like we could stay or we could go. I want to feel so overwhelmingly like this is what we're supposed to do.

Speaker 2 And so that would be my prayer for you guys.

Speaker 2 And that would be what I, if I were you, I'd, I'd sit down with your wife and say, this is what we need to be praying about, that we feel so overwhelmingly peaceful about whatever direction we choose and that we both feel it.

Speaker 2 And we both, you know, have that, that peace about it. Money-wise, just from a money thing, since that's what you called about,

Speaker 2 you know, at first I was more like, oh yeah, this dream job feels it. But then what you were saying about the political climate did kind of, I had a little pause there.

Speaker 2 I also wondered about, you said the pay was going to be the same, but you're moving to a major city. So I do wonder about lifestyle for you and with kids.
I wonder what that looks like.

Speaker 2 Is this a job where you would be kind of like in the city or would you be far on the outskirts? Those are some questions that I have.

Speaker 2 And what does that look like with the values that you have, that you think you'll have with kids and a family? That's something to play into the mix as well.

Speaker 3 Yeah,

Speaker 3 I believe that the requirement is that we just have to live within the general area of where I'll be located, where my office and everything was located.

Speaker 3 So we wouldn't have to live like necessarily in the city exactly, but you know, sort of regardless, it would definitely be like a more expensive area for us.

Speaker 3 Yeah, that's something to think about.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 Your income has to go a lot further in cities like DC or Philly, wherever you're going to be.

Speaker 4 um would they cover moving costs relocation costs they would yes that's a nice bonus that is i will say this it's going to be easier while you guys don't have kids than once you do have kids to make a dream job type move to a different city yeah so i'm still in the boat and i'm not mr you know like let's do it adventure time but this just feels like we'll figure it out we'll figure out her job if this really is the job for you that you really want and it does have room to grow i'm going to say let's say yes to this adventure.

Speaker 4 And later on, if we're like, hey, this is not an environment we can raise kids, we need to move further out, we need to switch careers, you can do that a few years from now.

Speaker 4 And hopefully your incomes have gone up by then as well.

Speaker 4 So I don't think we can just tell you. I mean, I think the flags are there for you to go make the move or to stay.
So it's not like we're swayed one way or the other.

Speaker 4 It's such a personal decision, like Jade said, that you guys both need to have peace about. So I would continue to, I don't know if you guys are people of faith.
I'd be praying about it.

Speaker 4 I'd make sure that my wife was in agreement on whatever we decide to do.

Speaker 3 And then let's just do it and not look back and say, What if we had stayed?

Speaker 2 Don't be a pillar of salt.

Speaker 3 Don't do that. Wait a minute.

Speaker 4 You're going to have the like, what if scenario? Well, what if I didn't take it? And what if I did take it? And so that's the part you have to just let go of and go, this is where I'm at.

Speaker 4 I'm going to do my best to make this a great season.

Speaker 2 Yeah. Yeah.
And I would say, you know, for your wife, part of, part of change, I think, that makes it so difficult is we're not, we're just looking at the negative side of it.

Speaker 2 But if she can start to get excited, that makes change a lot more fun.

Speaker 2 So, if she starts looking at jobs in that area, or if she can start to see opportunity in that area and start to generate some excitement, that also can help.

Speaker 2 Um, if you are trying to sway her over to your direction, excitement is the name of the game. That's what we told our kids when we came to Tennessee.

Speaker 2 It was like an adventure, like we're going on an adventure. So, anyway, good luck.

Speaker 4 Good luck to you. Whatever you do, you're gonna be okay.
That's how I feel.

Speaker 2 Right. You can always, you can always

Speaker 2 go back.

Speaker 6 This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. All right, here's the truth.

Speaker 6 I have great friends, a strong faith, an amazing wife and family, and I've even got two PhDs worth of information about how to be well.

Speaker 6 And yet, the times that I've spent with a great therapist across my life have made all the difference for me. The right therapist can change everything.

Speaker 6 And this month, my friends at BetterHelp are shining the spotlight on therapists these are people who truly make the world a better place with over 30,000 therapists better help is the largest online therapy provider in the world and better help works their average rating of 4.9 out of five proves it plus better help is totally online so it's easy to fit into your schedule to get started you just answer a few simple questions and they'll connect you with a licensed therapist that helps fit your needs and if it's not the right fit you can switch at any time for no extra cost This month, we celebrate the therapists who've helped millions of people take the next right step forward.

Speaker 6 If you're ready to find the therapist that's right for you, BetterHelp can help you start that journey. Visit betterhelp.com/slash Ramsey to get 10% off your first month.

Speaker 6 That's betterhelp, H-E-L-P dot com slash Ramsey.

Speaker 2 Alrighty, back to the phone lines we go. We got Elle, who's in Idaho.
What's going on, Elle? How can we help today?

Speaker 3 Well, I'm just trying to navigate what the right next step is.

Speaker 3 I guess my main question would be, what do I do about a vehicle that's worth about $4,000 that I owe nine on and needs a $5,000 repair? And that's just the chick of the iceberg.

Speaker 3 I can't begin to explain how

Speaker 3 far underwater I am.

Speaker 2 I'm sorry.

Speaker 3 All right.

Speaker 2 I hope you took a deep breath there with me.

Speaker 2 I know. Anything else besides the car that's eating your lunch?

Speaker 3 Oh, sure. About $19,000 in credit card debt.

Speaker 3 And I have a house that's tied up in a a divorce and

Speaker 3 it's

Speaker 3 I can't get it to sell because it needs repairs and it's not in great shape and we can't seem to communicate so everything's through lawyers at this point which makes everything super complicated so the total debt with everything is $212,000 $441 $212,441

Speaker 3 and When I'm looking for things to cut out, because I'm like,

Speaker 3 well, I've to figure it out because

Speaker 3 if I pay all the minimums of everything,

Speaker 3 I'm $605

Speaker 3 in the negative. And that's no groceries, no gas.
That's mortgage, a car payment that I'm paying on that doesn't run. I'm borrowing a vehicle.
I mean,

Speaker 3 I have multiple credit cards. My income is $4,133.
And that's a job that I work 35 hours a week at and child support. So my next step was

Speaker 2 how much of the $4,000 is child support?

Speaker 3 $1,333.

Speaker 2 Okay. What type of work do you do?

Speaker 3 I'm a dental assistant.

Speaker 2 A dental assistant? Okay.

Speaker 2 What you're making, so you said you're working 35 hours. Could you do the same work at an office where you can pull more hours and do maybe overtime hours?

Speaker 3 No,

Speaker 3 not where I'm I'm located. There's not a whole lot of overtime hours.
And actually, the office in my area actually pays higher hourly wages than any other office in this area. I've definitely looked.

Speaker 3 Okay, okay.

Speaker 4 If you guys end up selling the house, does that help you clean up this debt and fix a lot of these problems?

Speaker 3 Yeah, in theory, it definitely would.

Speaker 4 Does he have the money to fix it up or is he broke?

Speaker 3 No, he's broke and disabled. So,

Speaker 3 I know it's just a mess.

Speaker 3 Are you working with a real estate agent?

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 3 I was, but our contract ended and because of like the turmoil and the drama, she didn't want to renew her contract with us. Okay.
So now I'm searching for a new one.

Speaker 2 What type of work does the house need? Like tell us about it. Is it a fixer-upper or is it like no one would buy this house? It's got major problems.
Tell us about it.

Speaker 3 I mean, I begged him not to buy this house. That's the type of house house it is.
It needs major work.

Speaker 4 I mean, like foundation repairs or the kitchen's ugly. There's a huge difference.

Speaker 3 Like it can be old.

Speaker 3 It can be old.

Speaker 3 We're not talking about like paint and aesthetics. We're talking about like the foundation and the core of it.

Speaker 3 We moved in and my two daughters who are 17 and 15 now, when we moved into the house two years ago, we discovered that the 1930 house didn't have proper wiring or insulation.

Speaker 3 It was cinder blocks on the other side of the paneling. So we ripped them to the studs and redid everything.

Speaker 3 The basement, like if you go into the basement, the floor above you, you can see how it's like slanted. So like the basement, we need to lift the like main floor from the basement.
We're talking like

Speaker 3 major.

Speaker 4 Like whoever buys it is just going to destroy it and rebuild a new house on top.

Speaker 2 They're just getting the lot, yeah.

Speaker 4 So what could you sell it for as is?

Speaker 3 um

Speaker 3 i don't know somebody offered us 225 000 which is technically more than we owe on the loan but because of the way the divorce decree is stated um we didn't have to accept that offer so he denied it so

Speaker 2 this i guess my question is um all that was in place before you bought the house and did you know that going in so did you buy i guess what i'm asking is did you buy the house for a fair price when you bought it

Speaker 3 I bought the house for like a hundred and yeah, I mean, like, I don't, I feel like it was a fair price based on, sure, like, the value, but, like, did I know going into it the amount of repairs it was going to need?

Speaker 3 Yes and no, but at the time, I mean,

Speaker 3 you should look up the housing market in Sun Valley, Idaho. It'll blow your mind.
So, we're just outside of that. We're an hour outside of that.

Speaker 3 So, the house would be considered reasonable based on that. But just the amount of repairs and what needs to happen to the house is just like astronomical.

Speaker 2 Well, there's part of this where I go, hey, you bought the house. So somebody's going to buy it.

Speaker 2 And it's not like all that was hidden from you.

Speaker 2 And I'm not suggesting that you hide it from anybody else. But my point is, somebody's going to look at this and go, I'm willing to do the repairs.
I want the property.

Speaker 2 I want to be close to Sun Valley, whatever that is. So I would, I think it is worth getting with a realtor who's willing to take this on and can find the right buyer for you.

Speaker 2 I think that's going to help at least clear some of the confusion out of all this. You might not take away much money from it is what it sounds.

Speaker 4 Yeah, why didn't he take that offer?

Speaker 2 Being a knucklehead.

Speaker 4 Did he want to just drag this out? Like, was it out of spite?

Speaker 3 Like, I don't really,

Speaker 3 I feel like that is the nicest way to say it. Like, he just

Speaker 3 had to, he just wants to, I don't know, he just wants to control the situation.

Speaker 3 And

Speaker 3 it's kind of messed up because 30 days prior to that, the house had been listed at a lower value.

Speaker 3 And again, if that offer had been given to us 30 days prior, we would have had to take the offer no matter what because it was within 95% of the listing price, which is what the divorce decree says.

Speaker 3 So 30 days later, he and the realtor decided to increase the price. And I just went along with it because I don't care.
I don't care what we sell the house for as long as we pay off the loan.

Speaker 3 I literally don't care if I make even a dime on it. I just want to.

Speaker 4 Yeah, we don't have the luxury of trying to get the money. We We just need to get out of this so that you guys can both have some closure and stabilize your financial lives.

Speaker 4 So I don't know if that means going back to the decree and getting a judge to go, hey, if you get an offer above this, you have to take it. Yeah.

Speaker 3 And to make a force decision.

Speaker 3 I have a lawyer who I'm not having to pay because I went through a special program. So I have a lawyer that I'm working with that I'm meeting with on Monday that I already met with on Wednesday.

Speaker 2 Okay, so you're on the path to doing that before the time runs out.

Speaker 3 I'm trying. You are.

Speaker 3 I'm trying.

Speaker 4 And then this car's going to be a car.

Speaker 3 Let's talk about the car.

Speaker 3 Let's talk about it.

Speaker 3 Okay, whose car are you borrowing now?

Speaker 2 You said you were borrowing someone's car.

Speaker 2 Who's helping you? And how long are they going to have?

Speaker 3 I'm borrowing a car from a friend, and I can't have access to that car at all times.

Speaker 4 Okay, is your credit completely shot? If you went down to your credit union for a loan for the difference, would they give it to you?

Speaker 3 I think my credit's probably shot. It's probably like low sixes at this point.

Speaker 4 I would at least try and explain to the credit union, hey, I'm underwater on this car. I need the difference I'm underwater on plus a little bit to get a different car.

Speaker 4 And then you let go of that car. You might get $500 for it for parts at that point.
But you do not need to be hanging on to this car because if you put 5,000 in repairs, you're still underwater on it.

Speaker 4 And it's probably not worth $5,000 at that point.

Speaker 3 It definitely is not. It's not worth it.

Speaker 4 So you need to your goal is to just get the amount you're underwater on to clean the title and then get rid of it.

Speaker 2 Yep, $5,000. That's what you need.

Speaker 4 And that gets you some breathing.

Speaker 3 And now I I have the vehicle. Then go talk to them.

Speaker 4 Tell them you have bad collateral here. I am way underwater on this loan.
I'm not going to be able to pay you back unless you give me a different loan to

Speaker 4 clear the title and get out of this underwater situation.

Speaker 2 Yeah,

Speaker 2 that's first on the list. And then number two is, yeah, you got to get, I think if you can get out of that car, that's going to give you some breathing room.

Speaker 2 Obviously, now you're tasked with saving up some money.

Speaker 2 You know, it's great that you have a friend loaning you a car, and I understand that it's inconvenient, but for the most part, it's a blessing more than it is inconvenient.

Speaker 3 It's a huge blessing.

Speaker 2 Yeah, so get with her and say, here's my plan, because you know, she's doing you a solid. So here's my plan.
I'm going to try to get this other car paid off.

Speaker 2 I'm going to need a little bit more time because I got to stack up like four or five thousand dollars so I can get myself a beater and try to get out of this because I don't know if the credit union is going to lend me money for that, right?

Speaker 4 And then selling the house, you can clear the credit card debt with the proceeds.

Speaker 4 And since the girls are older, you got to get side jobs at night just to try to float the difference that you're, you said, 600 bucks.

Speaker 2 Yeah, try to do something that you can work from home and do so you don't need the car. I would suggest customer service.

Speaker 2 All right, all right. So, buying or selling your house is a very, very big deal.

Speaker 2 Okay, there's a lot of clickbait headlines out there, there's a lot of conflicting data out there, and it really is hard to know what's actually going on in the housing market.

Speaker 2 But don't worry, we're here to help you. We've always got the latest trends, and we make it very easy for you to understand, okay?

Speaker 2 So, for instance, median home prices dropped a bit last month, now they're around 426,000. A typical season shift, a typical season shift as we head into the fall.
So that's normal.

Speaker 2 Also, buyers have more options and negotiating power while sellers face more competition.

Speaker 2 So if you want to learn more about the housing market trends and get free tools to help you buy and sell with confidence, we've got you covered.

Speaker 2 Just go to ramseysolutions.com slash market or click the link in the show notes if you're listening on podcast or YouTube. So important.

Speaker 2 All right, George, let's keep it rolling with Brie in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. Hey, Bree.

Speaker 3 Hi, how are you? How are you doing?

Speaker 2 We're doing great. How can George and I help?

Speaker 3 So basically, yesterday I had a talk with my husband and he thinks that he wants to change his job. He's right now assistant manager in a truck company.
So it's a big load of work

Speaker 3 and

Speaker 3 stressful work, talking with the truck drivers, mechanics,

Speaker 3 towing trucks, and everything like that.

Speaker 3 And he thinks that we need to take a car

Speaker 3 on credit and preferably on mine because my credit score is better than his.

Speaker 3 And it will be like Toyota, Sudan, so he can do Uber.

Speaker 3 Oh, something like that.

Speaker 4 Quit his salary job to do Uber and take out a car loan to fund this quote-unquote business?

Speaker 4 Yeah.

Speaker 4 Did I just sum that up?

Speaker 3 Basically,

Speaker 3 he's making right now a week $1,800.

Speaker 3 And his friend at work

Speaker 3 told him that on Uber, they can make like $2,000 and more a week. Oh, boy.
So that's why he's thinking about it.

Speaker 4 No, I would not listen to this friend.

Speaker 2 Especially if you're thinking about going into debt for this.

Speaker 4 Yeah, here's what's going to happen.

Speaker 4 He's going to drive that car into ground, and the depreciation is going to hit it so hard that you guys are going to be underwater on this car within the first week.

Speaker 4 Do you guys have any debt now?

Speaker 3 Yeah, we have like 40,000.

Speaker 4 Oh, perfect. Well, let's just add to the pile then and pretend it doesn't exist.

Speaker 3 Okay.

Speaker 3 I'm thinking, to be honest, but like, I don't know how to tell him that he doesn't even know that I'm calling right now.

Speaker 3 What do you do for work, Bree?

Speaker 3 I'm a stay-at-home mom. I'm having a baby one year and nine months.
And also be having a baby on the way home. Wow, congrats.

Speaker 3 Okay, thank you. So,

Speaker 4 now is definitely not the time to put our income in flux

Speaker 4 and rely on people who need riding.

Speaker 3 Like, he needs to stick to it. Like, maybe ask,

Speaker 3 maybe at work, he can do

Speaker 4 work or riddle me this: why doesn't he, on the side, after work, go out and drive with the car he has if he wants to try it out?

Speaker 3 He cannot because we have 20-year-old Lexus

Speaker 3 that doesn't have

Speaker 3 major issues with the engine. Okay.
So he cannot do it.

Speaker 2 Then I think that's a great indicator that this is not the job for you. There's a lot of jobs, Bree, and this might be the way you frame it to him.

Speaker 2 I don't know what kind of guy he is, but there's a lot of jobs that have

Speaker 2 prerequisites to be able to do it. Like if you want to be in the NBA, you got to be like seven foot tall or you got to be able to shoot like Steph Curry.

Speaker 2 And if you don't have that, you can't do the job. And in this case, if you need a brand new, you know, Lexus truck that you don't have, you can't do the job.
And I think it's just as simple as that.

Speaker 2 You could go out and, you know, pull all these strings and pull all this debt to try to force this in, but that there's no guarantee there. Okay.

Speaker 2 And so I think that if he doesn't enjoy his job currently, that's fine. I'm all, I'm all for him looking for different jobs that he enjoys more.

Speaker 2 But if I were in your shoes, I would say, honey, I want you to do work that you love, but we, here's my, my, my boundaries. We can't go into debt for it.

Speaker 2 And if possible, I'd like to wait until this baby is born so that we can have some solidity going through that. And then once the baby is born, you know, go do your thing.

Speaker 2 Do you think he would listen?

Speaker 3 I think he will.

Speaker 3 Like, I was trying to think logically, is it a good idea even to get a new car? Because, like, we were planning after giving birth, of course, we need more space,

Speaker 3 especially with a car. I don't have a car, but

Speaker 4 yeah, you definitely need a new to you car, but that doesn't mean we're going to go into debt.

Speaker 2 I'm not going to be a little bit about the car.

Speaker 3 Yeah, and you should be. You need a different car.

Speaker 4 But what you don't need is another $25,000 loan on top of your $40,000 in debt.

Speaker 4 And so what I would do, if I was in your shoes, is go, all right, we need to save up to get a reliable car, and then we're going to clean up this 40 grand of debt.

Speaker 4 And we're going to, he's not going to be switching jobs. He's going to be working extra.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 4 Because you guys make seven grand a month month right now.

Speaker 2 Yeah. Yeah.
You guys have a fine income.

Speaker 4 And so how quickly can we power 40,000?

Speaker 3 We have a fine income, I think, but still we barely managing to cover everything.

Speaker 2 Do you guys have a budget?

Speaker 3 Kind of.

Speaker 2 That's a no.

Speaker 3 I'm trying to keep up, but to be honest, I don't know what is going on in his credit card because basically

Speaker 3 all that we put on his credit card.

Speaker 3 So this is mine all of that.

Speaker 2 This is a very... Bri, you're helping so.
Thank you for calling in because you're helping so many people right now. You're right.

Speaker 2 When you're on credit cards and, you know, the spouse has a credit card in their wallet, that's different from what the, the, the other spouse has in their wallet. It does.

Speaker 2 It makes it very hard to stick to a budget because, unless that person is going to bank connect all their credit cards to the budget, so you can see every transaction coming through, you're right.

Speaker 2 You have no idea what you're spending.

Speaker 2 And it's very easy to overspend on credit cards so that at the end of the month, if you plan on paying it off, yeah, you're spending up every bit of extra margin that you had to pay down this credit card.

Speaker 2 So

Speaker 3 what I found out for September, we overspent $4,000.

Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 You have some big conversations that you need to have, Brie. And I'll give you three takeaways that I think.

Speaker 2 The first one I already gave you, which is you need to tell him that your boundaries for him switching jobs cannot include debt.

Speaker 2 And the second thing is it needs to happen happen after this baby is born.

Speaker 2 And then the third thing is you want to talk about a more transparent way of handling finances that doesn't include credit cards. Like I want a one check-in account.
We both have a debit card.

Speaker 2 We both spend the money that we have on the debit card because I am freaking out because of our debt. So those are the three things you have to tackle, write them down.

Speaker 2 And you can, I mean, you know him better than we do. So you know the best way to kind of be tactical about that.
But those those are your non-negotiables.

Speaker 4 Do you guys come from the same cultural background?

Speaker 4 No, like similar.

Speaker 4 Okay,

Speaker 4 what's his background?

Speaker 3 He's from Uzbekistan and I'm from Ukraine. Okay.

Speaker 4 And are you guys immigrants or were you born stateside here?

Speaker 3 We are immigrants. Everything's clear.

Speaker 4 Great. My parents were immigrants as well.
And here's what I want to remind you. You guys came here for a better life, I assume.

Speaker 4 Whether you chose to or your parents chose to, right?

Speaker 3 We chose both.

Speaker 4 And so, here's what I want to remind you: the American dream is now go into as much debt as possible to fund a fake lifestyle so that hopefully we can impress people.

Speaker 4 And I don't want you guys to fall into that trap.

Speaker 4 Yeah, they say, Hey, come get a credit card. It's the American way.
You'll love it over here. Get your credit score up.
We'll give you more line of credit. Hey, we can get you into a brand new car.

Speaker 4 Wouldn't that be nice? Do you see how insane this is?

Speaker 4 It is. And And so that's what you need to convince him of.
Remind him of what he's doing on this earth. He's got a little baby, a little baby on the way.
We need to take care of our family first.

Speaker 4 And that means getting out of debt and staying out of debt.

Speaker 4 That's what's going to cause some actual peace. That's going to cause a real American dream to happen, not trying to do Uber full-time with a car loan.

Speaker 4 That's supposedly going to put yourself in a better financial position. I can guarantee you it's not.
He's going to be calling the show a year from now saying, how do I get out of this?

Speaker 4 I'm $20,000 upside down on my car loan.

Speaker 4 So I hope that helps you with the conversation. Again, like Jade said, you know how to convince him better than anyone.

Speaker 4 And I think your feelings and emotions around this should be the first thing you lead with. And if he doesn't respect that, you have a marriage problem.

Speaker 2 Yeah, and that's so true. This is a good indicator.

Speaker 2 When you bring this to him, if he starts flipping out or does it anyway, if he does this Uber thing anyway, your next step is we need to get into some counseling and spend some money on that.

Speaker 2 That's the tough part. Oh my goodness.

Speaker 3 Oh boy, oh, boy, oh, boy.

Speaker 4 So sorry you're going through this break.

Speaker 2 Me too. Me too.

Speaker 4 And he needs to find better friends who aren't like, dude, you got to do Uber, man. I'm making great money over here.

Speaker 4 They don't live your life. They don't know your stress.

Speaker 2 I know, that's right. Stick around.
We'll be back.

Speaker 2 Hey, what's up, guys? It's Jade. You know know that moment when you check your bank account and think, wait a minute, how is my paycheck gone already? Yeah, not cool.

Speaker 2 You work way too hard to feel broke like that. And the truth is, you deserve better than just not feeling broke.

Speaker 2 You need more margin, more breathing room, and that's what our Every Dollar Budget app helps you find. Most people free up an average of $3,015 in just the first 15 minutes in the app.

Speaker 2 Just imagine how much you could find to pay off debt, stack savings, and just breathe easier with that money stress gone.

Speaker 2 Things might seem tight, I get it, but I promise you, you've got way more margin than you think. And with every dollar, you'll find it.

Speaker 2 Download it for free today in the App Store or Google Play today.

Speaker 2 Welcome back to the Ramsey Show. We're here in the Fair Ones Credit Union studio.
Continuing on with your calls, your life, your money. That's what we're talking about.

Speaker 2 We do it through live calls on the phone lines. These are not rehearsed.
We don't know these people ahead of time. They don't give us a script.

Speaker 2 This is just, we're flying by the seat of our pants, George.

Speaker 4 Life is improv, baby. That's right.

Speaker 2 Let's go. Elijah is in California of the United States.
What's going on, Elijah? That's what it says on the screen.

Speaker 3 What's going on, buddy?

Speaker 3 How's it going? Thanks for taking the call. You're welcome.
How can we help?

Speaker 3 So, ultimately, my question is trying to figure out how

Speaker 3 to separate from my parents.

Speaker 3 About two years ago, we found out my grandpa was going to lose his home. We grew up in that house for 15 years.
We ended up trying to help.

Speaker 3 During that process, there was

Speaker 3 a lot of speed bumps along the way. My parents had to pay off some debt of theirs to get qualified.
I had to get a loan from my boss to get it, and we ended up getting it done.

Speaker 3 But it's been two years, and what was your long-term game plan here?

Speaker 3 Really,

Speaker 3 it was to have my grandpa, honestly, just live the rest of his life in his home comfortably that he's lived in for about 15, 20 years.

Speaker 3 That was

Speaker 3 what we were trying to do. I found it as an opportunity for me.

Speaker 3 I told my parents this, you know, it seems like a good opportunity for me later in the future if we end up selling the house to, you know, come up with some cash and just get my future started um

Speaker 3 but there's been you know some pushback some discrepancies about who owns the house how the money's getting split and it's it's just been a real headache well whose name is on the deed

Speaker 3 all three of ours so my stepmom my dad and me are all on loan and title okay wow okay and that's a is it a third each

Speaker 3 i mean we never really discussed that i would assume it's a third each.

Speaker 4 Like, if you sold today and you got the profits, you'd split it three ways, right? You all put in equal amounts?

Speaker 3 No, so I put in $14,000. I got a loan from my boss for $14,000.

Speaker 4 That feels awkward in and of itself.

Speaker 2 Gosh, a loan from your boss?

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 4 It's kind of awkward to ask for a raise after that. Yeah, man.

Speaker 3 Yeah,

Speaker 3 he's been really good to us. He really helped us out with that process.
It was definitely awkward.

Speaker 3 We did some things along the way that i you know wish we didn't i didn't know about you guys before that so we took some money out of the equity um consolidated debt um how much did your dad put in and then how much did your stepmom put in

Speaker 3 not put in anything according to them if you ask them they're going to tell you that they put in twenty eight thousand dollars but in my uh interpretation of that they put in twenty eight thousand toward their debt to get qualified for the house so okay it's not a dance routine.

Speaker 4 There's no interpretation. It's how much was actually down when the house was purchased.
It doesn't matter what they did to qualify for whatever.

Speaker 2 So they paid down their own debt just to qualify for the loan.

Speaker 4 Correct.

Speaker 4 But they put no money into it.

Speaker 3 No money. Here's my thing.

Speaker 4 If you put 14 in, you should get a third of the profits plus the 14 you put in. Is that fair?

Speaker 3 Yeah,

Speaker 3 the way we've done it from then is because, you know, they want to claim some of the taxes. They want to do these things.
I kind of pushed back on it.

Speaker 3 Like, you guys haven't really put any money into the house. Why should you guys get all the profits from it?

Speaker 3 That thinking is probably wrong, but I ended up splitting the $14,000 to make it fair to feel like, hey, we've all put in to the house. So, you know, we split it three ways.

Speaker 3 And now it made me feel a little better. Like, oh, you guys put the same amount in

Speaker 3 as I did.

Speaker 2 When you said we ended up, what do you mean mean you ended up saying?

Speaker 2 What do you mean by that?

Speaker 3 There was just some discussions about

Speaker 3 the house being sold, and they wanted to claim,

Speaker 3 you know, my stepmom and my dad wanted to claim their portion, and I was going to get the smaller portion. I felt like I slightly deserved a little bit more because I put most of the money in.
Right.

Speaker 4 So there's no written agreement for any of this.

Speaker 3 Unfortunately, there is not.

Speaker 2 Okay, and I'm saying,

Speaker 2 I guess it doesn't really matter.

Speaker 2 When are you guys putting the house up for sale?

Speaker 3 That's the thing is, is one of my questions.

Speaker 3 Is it worth fighting for? I've given them options, but like, hey, dad, how about you guys claim the house for 20 years? And that'll be like my way of buying you guys out.

Speaker 3 You guys claim the property taxes.

Speaker 4 I just call BS when this was all for grandpa. This was just a nightmare for the entire family, and now it's turned into financial transactions of who gets what.

Speaker 2 What's the house even worth if it were to sell today?

Speaker 3 I looked on Zillow, and it says about $900, but I don't think we're going to get that because

Speaker 3 it's just not in the condition. It needs a new roof.
The air conditioning doesn't work. I've got quotes on all these things.

Speaker 4 And what's the mortgage?

Speaker 3 The mortgage left is $551,000.

Speaker 4 Okay, so let's say you guys get $800,000 for it. Is that fair?

Speaker 3 That could be fair, yeah.

Speaker 4 Pay off the mortgage, pay some fees, $200,000 is what you guys net, divided by three. Everyone gets $66,000, and you call it a day, or you get a little bit more because of your $14,000.

Speaker 4 I don't know if you can convince them of that. You can create an agreement.
I don't know if they'll sign it. This is on all of you for having no written agreement.

Speaker 4 So you must know there's a stupid tax here to be paid that might lose you $14,000. And that's if you can convince them to sell it.

Speaker 3 Yeah, and there was also equity we took out. So that would also also have to oh gosh who took the equity out

Speaker 3 um it was supposed to be taking out for property taxes that we couldn't pay one year we ended up taking out a hundred and fifteen thousand dollars hold on all three of you together couldn't afford the property taxes on this home

Speaker 3 i i mean at that time no I could afford a couple a couple thousand, but my, you know, I don't want to speak down on them, but my parents at the time, just financially, they weren't in the position to come up with $3,000, four, five thousand dollars.

Speaker 4 Then, none of you should be in the home ownership game, let alone together as some sort of weird business partnership.

Speaker 4 So, I will try to get a quick claim deed and get your portion, and they buy you out. And if they can't afford to, we force the sale.

Speaker 2 The numbers you quoted, was that before or after the 150?

Speaker 2 So, are we

Speaker 4 deeper in debt than we thought?

Speaker 2 Are you only going to earn 50,000 off this sale, or are you going to

Speaker 3 probably, but that's an

Speaker 3 itself itself that

Speaker 3 I have kind of heard coming from them that

Speaker 3 I shouldn't get more than them.

Speaker 3 I shouldn't get more than them. They should get a bigger portion.

Speaker 2 Well, if we do what you said, which is if there's another loan out there for another $150,000,

Speaker 2 you don't stand to make much on this.

Speaker 2 Yeah. So it's, I mean, that, then we're really talking about like, how much do you really want to fight on this? Because you said it's worth $551, maybe you sold it for $800,000.

Speaker 2 If we subtract that $150,000 out of this, that $200,000 that we thought we would net suddenly goes down to like $50,000 or $60,000,

Speaker 2 split three ways.

Speaker 2 So now you guys are quibbling over $20,000 a piece, which don't get me wrong, $20,000 is a lot of money, but you have to decide

Speaker 4 what it costs. They probably can't afford to refinance this thing and get you out of it, right?

Speaker 3 Uh-huh. No, they can't.
Well, I mean, I can try. I can, I've already talked to people about refinancing.
I just don't think they

Speaker 3 want to take their name off.

Speaker 4 Everybody wants out, then just force the sale.

Speaker 2 Yeah. That's what you're saying.

Speaker 4 You guys all should come together to cover the mortgage for grandpa, not buy it off of him and create this family drama. This is destroying a legacy, not helping keep it up.

Speaker 5 Hey guys, it's Rachel Cruz, and I've got great news for you. The Ramsey Christmas Cash Giveaway is here.
We are giving away $500 every week, plus a grand prize of $5,000 in cash.

Speaker 5 Listen, you can enter daily to boost your chances of winning, and there's no purchase necessary. Just go to ramseysolutions.com/slash giveaway.
That's ramseysolutions.com slash giveaway.

Speaker 5 Good luck, you guys.

Speaker 2 All right, George.

Speaker 2 We talk about some very important things on on the show, possibly none more important than the will itself, because you amass all this debt, you've done well financially, but one of these days you're going to leave the earth.

Speaker 2 And so you need to make sure that your family and your loved ones know what to do. But we get a lot of questions surrounding will.
So let's do a round robin. I'll ask the question.
You say the answer.

Speaker 2 All right. All right.
How do you know, George, if I know if I need a trust or if my estate is too complicated for an online will?

Speaker 4 Okay, in general, if your estate is worth less than a million, a will online is a great option for now.

Speaker 2 Love that. Okay, well, what do I need to start my will online?

Speaker 4 It's answering some hard questions like, who do you want to get your stuff? Who's going to take care of the minor kids? Who do you want to make decisions if you're incapacitated?

Speaker 4 That's where it gets real, but you got to know those answers.

Speaker 2 You do, you do, you do. Okay, so number three, is an online will legally valid?

Speaker 4 Yes, it's valid in your state. So it's got to be state-specific and match those laws.
So if you move, you need a new will.

Speaker 2 That's right. The same thing happened to us.
All right. Why would I want an online will versus doing a traditional one with a lawyer?

Speaker 4 I mean, it's like saying, why would I want to get my license renewed online when I can go into the DMV?

Speaker 4 Pay triple. That's kind of what it's like.
Do you want to work with a lawyer and pay, you know, three, four times more? Be my guest. But if you can do it online, it's cheaper, more convenient.

Speaker 4 So knock it out.

Speaker 2 There you go.

Speaker 2 That's it in a nutshell.

Speaker 2 So if you have more questions or if you want to know if an online will is right for you, go to ramseysolutions.com/slash wills quiz to find out if an online will is right for you.

Speaker 2 It was right for me a while. You know,

Speaker 4 I used Mama Bear Legal Forms and it was super easy.

Speaker 2 It is. It is.
All right, let's go to Isabel. She's in San Antonio, Tejas.
What's going on, Isabel? Hi.

Speaker 3 Hi. Hi, thank you for taking my call.

Speaker 3 I just had a question. I have been at my job for a little over a decade.

Speaker 3 We were recently acquired by a bigger facility. So I have a pretty substantial amount in my 401k

Speaker 3 with my previous employer. My question is, the new company that we were acquired by does offer a 401 as well.

Speaker 3 I'm on the fence on whether I should move it. My husband thinks that we should move it to the new 401k.

Speaker 3 I just don't know if a direct 401k rollover into the new one is the best option since they're both 401ks. So I was just looking for some guidance.

Speaker 4 Are they doing sort of automatic rollovers with this merger where they're saying, hey, we're going to take all these old 401ks and just move them into the new 401k? What are they saying?

Speaker 3 They're saying that we are given the option for a 401k.

Speaker 3 It's not going to be a direct rollover.

Speaker 3 Unfortunately,

Speaker 3 we're still going to be getting

Speaker 3 the option to have it, but no, it's not going to go directly to

Speaker 3 a direct rollover.

Speaker 2 So it has to go to a IRA?

Speaker 4 Yeah, you just do a direct rollover to an IRA that you would control.

Speaker 3 Okay.

Speaker 3 Yeah, because they said everything that I move to it is not going to get, you know, if I have a substantial amount in there,

Speaker 3 it's not going to get like.

Speaker 3 I don't know why the amount would matter.

Speaker 4 Is there like some sort of limit to where they won't roll it over if it's over a certain amount?

Speaker 3 No, no. I just never really dealt with it before.

Speaker 4 So I would get in touch with HR and see, hey, what's going on with the old 401ks? What's the plan?

Speaker 4 If you have great options and low fees in that new 401k and they can do a direct rollover, that's fine. Or if you want to do a direct rollover to an IRA that you control, that's also fine.

Speaker 4 The key here is you don't want to actually take out the money. You never want to see this money because then you're going to get hit with penalties and fees.

Speaker 4 So that's the simplest way to do it. Is just those are the key words: direct rollover.

Speaker 2 Great call. Great question.
All right. We've got Monica, who's in Chicago, Illinois.
Hey, Monica, you're on the line.

Speaker 3 Hi, thank you for taking the call. You bet.

Speaker 3 My question is centered around my home. You know, my husband and I, we bought a home in 2020 when the mortgage rates were really low.

Speaker 3 So we have a great rate of 2.5, but we've, you know, the last couple of years, we've just outgrown the home. The layout of the home is just doesn't fit our needs anymore.

Speaker 3 And we are looking either to take out a home equity loan to Romado, extend our current home because we have that great mortgage rate, or potentially purchasing a new home.

Speaker 3 But every home that we've been looking that would fit our needs is much, much higher than our current mortgage at a higher interest rate. So we're just trying to, what makes sense, what's the best

Speaker 3 case for us.

Speaker 2 Well, what I'm hearing, I'm hearing two sides of an equation. It's like, hey, if we keep the current home, we'd like to remodel it, but we don't have the money to do that.

Speaker 2 So we'd have to take debt to do it. And then I see another side over here, which says, well, what if we just took debt and got a bigger house?

Speaker 2 And then you realize, but if we did that, we couldn't afford it. So

Speaker 2 is the second option is shining light on what's really true which is you can't afford it does that make sense

Speaker 3 well we don't have any other debt

Speaker 3 we make

Speaker 3 a fairly stable good income

Speaker 3 we're under the equation that they recommend of like how much of your so your monthly income how much are you allocating towards your mortgage we're way under that i understand that but if you were to add that debt if you were to take that same amount let's say how much do you think you'll you'll spend on a remodel

Speaker 2 like another 150 okay so if you went out in the market and bought another house for 150 000 more dollars you'd suddenly realize oh my gosh i can't afford that which is what happened so especially when that heloc is at you know eight percent interest and now it's variable so you're not really winning by keeping the two and a half

Speaker 2 right do you see what we're saying

Speaker 3 options between like not a helo because i've seen that that has like a variable uh interest rate so i was thinking like another type of home equity or personality. I mean, even a home equity loan,

Speaker 4 it'll be a fixed rate on that, but it's still going to be much higher than your two and a half. So I just wouldn't hang on to these golden handcuffs of the low rate.

Speaker 4 But the math of it is you guys can't afford to move to a bigger house with the current numbers, and you can't afford to do the renovation.

Speaker 4 So we need to find out a compromise here, which might be we're going to save up in cash flow these renovations over the next year or two. So how much money can you guys save up right now per month?

Speaker 3 We can probably save about

Speaker 3 4,000.

Speaker 4 4,000 a month?

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 4 So that's 50 grand a year, and you have 150 grand of renovations you want to do? Is that really what it's going to cost?

Speaker 3 That's approximately. We've had a couple of quotes here and there, and they vary between 80 to the 100, I could be up to 200.
Oh, gosh. So it's multiple rooms.

Speaker 2 You're doing multiple rooms of the house?

Speaker 3 It would just, it would be an extension and it's an older home. So if you're already going to

Speaker 4 my other fear is that you overbuild on the neighborhood. Because what what kind of homes are in your neighborhood? What are the going numbers people are selling for?

Speaker 3 It's actually getting better and we see these type of home they call them additions or renovations like coming up like two per block every couple of months.

Speaker 3 So the the neighborhood is actually you know, moving along the same path of doing this, extending your home.

Speaker 3 They're all smaller homes and as time passes, every other block, every like down our street, there's three right now happening.

Speaker 4 Would you guys want to stay there forever, regardless of the mortgage interest rate? Is this the forever home if you added 100 grand of renovations to it?

Speaker 4 Or at least, you know, five year home or something?

Speaker 3 Yes, like if we were to, you know, accommodate it,

Speaker 3 renovate it, we could see this being our forever home.

Speaker 3 So that's why we were kind of liking the idea of like, well, we have a low mortgage rate. We pay a low mortgage.

Speaker 3 We're able to save a little bit, but if we want to do it soon, we would have to incur in this. Yeah, what's the exact urgency here?

Speaker 2 What changed in your situation that the home was good in 2020, but now it's not anymore?

Speaker 3 Did you have kids? Well, we just got married.

Speaker 3 We didn't have kids. We didn't have pets.
And we weren't thinking that this was going to be the forever home.

Speaker 3 But as time passed, and now we have a daughter and pets, and we're starting to see things more long-term.

Speaker 3 You know, back then it was even so hard to get a home

Speaker 3 home because the prices were so low.

Speaker 4 Well, if your mortgage is, if your mortgage is so reasonable right now, couldn't you move up in home?

Speaker 2 That's what I was going to say. I feel like your money is better spent saving up for to close the gap on a down payment of the home that would really suit your needs.

Speaker 2 Because adding in an extension and building on and la,

Speaker 2 that feels like, like to George's point, that you could really overbuild

Speaker 2 and that you're just uncovering a nightmare of just more and more and more expenses.

Speaker 4 It's going to be stressful for the next year or two, even doing this with or without debt.

Speaker 4 So I would encourage you guys to go, okay, if we just keep knocking out this mortgage, we're just building more equity. And when we go to sell, we'll get more profit.

Speaker 4 We can put that toward the next home. That's what I would encourage you guys to do.
That's what I've done in the past.

Speaker 4 If you guys can knock out that mortgage, well, now we have 100% equity when we sell.

Speaker 4 So that would be my goal for you guys is just move up in-house and make sure that mortgage is 25% of take-home pay or less.

Speaker 4 Hey guys, George Camel here. Do you ever feel like insurance companies only care about your money and not what you actually need? Well, there's a better way.

Speaker 4 When you go to Ramsey's Insurance Resource Hub, you'll start feeling confident that you're getting the right coverage that's truly best for you.

Speaker 4 You'll find helpful info on everything from life insurance, health insurance, identity theft protection, and more.

Speaker 4 And when you're ready to get the coverage you need, you can connect with a Ramsey Trusted Insurance Pro who will only get you what you need at the best price.

Speaker 4 Go to ramseysolutions.com slash insurance, ramseysolutions.com slash insurance.

Speaker 2 All right, it's time for our question of the day, which is is brought to you by YReFi. If your private student loans are in default and if you feel stuck, I'm telling you, you're not out of options.

Speaker 2 YReFi specializes in helping borrowers just like you find real solutions with low fixed-rate refinancing. So go to yrefi.com slash Ramsey.
That's the letter Y-R-E-F-Y.com slash Ramsey.

Speaker 2 Remember, it's not available in all states.

Speaker 4 Today's question comes from Declan in California. I'm currently earning more than I ever have, but I find myself struggling to tithe.
I haven't stopped, but I'm doing it with a heavy heart.

Speaker 4 I'm married, we're debt-free, and have a baby. It's not the same to give 10 bucks when you earn $100,000 as it is giving $10,000 when you earn $100,000.
And what?

Speaker 4 At this level, you start measuring the opportunity cost, what that money could mean for your family, the experiences it could fund, and the security it could provide.

Speaker 4 I'm not questioning the principle of tithing, but I am wrestling with the posture of my heart.

Speaker 4 My concern is that even though I haven't stopped tithing, it might not be pleasing to the Lord if it's not offered joyfully. Do you have any advice for me? What a great question.

Speaker 4 That's a very thoughtful question from Declan. I appreciate the way he phrased this all.
And

Speaker 4 I relate to it. I can actually see where he's coming from.
As the numbers start to get bigger,

Speaker 4 there's more zeros on the end, even though because 10%, like he said, of 100, well, yeah, 10 bucks. And I got to live on the 90.
That's something. Now, 100,000 and I'm giving 10,000,

Speaker 4 it definitely puts some pause.

Speaker 2 I mean, yes, you could say that, but you could also flip the script and be like, listen,

Speaker 2 if you only had $100 and you had to give 10 of it, you'd be like, shoot. Like, I already couldn't do anything with this money.

Speaker 4 And now, there's a threshold of like, I can survive off of this. So

Speaker 4 there's a piece of it where you go, well, can you live? Can you be grateful that you make $100,000? Now, in California, who knows? Sure. That might not get you very far based on where he's living.

Speaker 4 And I don't know how much he makes.

Speaker 4 He's giving us the principal. He didn't say how much he's actually making or how much he's giving.

Speaker 2 He said he's not questioning the principle, but I do wonder if there's something missing from what he

Speaker 2 believes, because I think the heart posture thing,

Speaker 2 I think, and I don't know, Declan, but I think the biggest reminder is if you can remember it was never yours. Once we start thinking of it as ours is when all bets are off.

Speaker 4 Yeah, we call that, you know, being a steward is what the Bible says. And it definitely changes it when you go, I'm not managing this for me.
I'm managing it for someone else.

Speaker 4 If it's not my money, then it's not my business.

Speaker 4 I'm just going to do what's right. I'm going to be faithful and obedient, do the 10%, and learn to live on the rest.
It's like we do with taxes. You know, now taxes are not fun.

Speaker 4 I hope you have more enjoyment tithing than you do paying taxes. But you go, all right, I got to pay my 25%

Speaker 4 to the government.

Speaker 4 And I'm going to learn to live on the rest.

Speaker 2 Yeah. And I mean, I would just,

Speaker 2 it does feel different when it's the government because it's like.

Speaker 2 anger inducing.

Speaker 2 I would encourage you, since you seem like a faith-filled person, I would encourage you to pray about that and ask God, hey, help me out with this.

Speaker 2 I want to do it, but I don't want to do it based on legalism. I want to do it with the right heart and I want to be a cheerful giver.
Tell them to this.

Speaker 2 Ask for help. And when you ask, usually that door is open.

Speaker 4 You shall receive. That's right.
I like that. You know, it's kind of this like, God, I trust you more than my money.
And so it's not about losing 10%.

Speaker 4 It's just about acknowledging 100% belongs to God. That's the faith posture.
And

Speaker 4 it takes a place of spiritual maturity that is difficult to get to. And so I appreciate you kind of

Speaker 4 showing us this journey while you're in it.

Speaker 2 And a little practicality on it. You know, you're faking it till you make it, but a little practicality would be to remind yourself.

Speaker 2 of all your blessings because you were blessed with now one you know the ten thousand dollars that you now have to tithe from uh or i'm sorry the hundred thousand that you're now tithing from.

Speaker 2 If you can kind of list out, oh my gosh, here's how my life's better.

Speaker 2 Here's how this has been a breakthrough for me, like all of those blessings, I think will also give you, put you in a greater spirit of gratitude to be able to do that.

Speaker 4 So just a good, a great resource on this is Dave Ramsey's book, The Legacy Journey.

Speaker 4 He unpacks this beautifully with scripture and the heart and the motives behind it and all about wealth building as well. So make sure to check out that book.

Speaker 2 All right. Very good.
Back to the phone lines. Becca in Austin, Texas.

Speaker 3 What's up, Becca how are you doing good thank you for taking my call absolutely

Speaker 3 my question for y'all is so I'm in the market I need to buy a new car and based off of my savings I'm wondering what you guys think I should spend on a car and if you think that I should take out a loan and if I do take out a loan how much should I put down now Becca do you think we're going to tell you to take out a loan on a vehicle

Speaker 3 okay yeah we like

Speaker 3 scratch that one off off the list.

Speaker 4 We just like you too much to put you into debt. So let's figure out how much, Carl, we can get.
How much do you have in savings?

Speaker 3 I have just over $60,000.

Speaker 4 Does that include your emergency fund? Is that everything?

Speaker 3 That's 401k, Roth IRA, checking savings. Oh, boy.

Speaker 4 Okay, well, let's take retirement out of this. How much do you have that's non-retirement above your emergency fund?

Speaker 3 I have

Speaker 3 just in my checkings, I have just over $22,000.

Speaker 4 Okay. Do you have savings, like for an emergency fund, or is that it? Yes.

Speaker 3 I have savings on top of that.

Speaker 4 Okay. So what's your three to six month emergency fund? How much is in there?

Speaker 3 Honestly, I haven't broken that down. I have a pretty, a relatively low cost of living, so I know that I could live off of that for quite some time.

Speaker 4 Well, I want to encourage you to split it because here's what happens. The car becomes the emergency and then it depletes your emergency fund.

Speaker 4 So I would have a separate, you know, maybe you create another account within a savings account. You can have multiple, and one is emergency fund, the other one is car fund.
That's what I would do.

Speaker 4 So take three to six months, set it aside. Whatever's left over in cash becomes your car fund.
And if it doesn't get you the car you want right now, keep saving.

Speaker 2 What's your income?

Speaker 3 I'm in college, so I make just under $23,000 an hour.

Speaker 3 I work four to five days a week, so it comes out to about $24,000 a year. Okay.

Speaker 4 And how much car are you looking at? Like, tell us the number or the make and model.

Speaker 3 Either a Toyota or a Honda.

Speaker 3 I was hoping originally to spend about $9,000, but

Speaker 3 the car market right now is not great,

Speaker 3 so that's not going to get me quite what I thought. You know, I want to get something that is worth buying something new.

Speaker 3 My family lives in a different city, so I want to be able to drive and see them as well.

Speaker 2 What if you spend like $12,000?

Speaker 3 Okay.

Speaker 4 That would be my top number. So here's our parameter.
You should never have things that have wheels and motors that add up to more than half of your annual income.

Speaker 4 So if this is your only car and you make 24 grand a year, 12K would be my out-the-door number for you. And so that's what you're looking for, which definitely changes your search.

Speaker 4 You're not going to the new car dealership. You're not just looking at any car.
Because if you look at a 2023 Corolla, well, now the 2012 looks like I'm not going to drive that.

Speaker 3 Right.

Speaker 4 And so for, especially for a college kid, I think you should be driving the worst cars when you're young, and it should only get better over time. Absolutely.

Speaker 4 And I see too many 16-year-olds in my neighborhood with nicer cars than me. I know that drives me insane.

Speaker 4 What are your parents doing?

Speaker 3 I agree.

Speaker 3 Yeah, thankfully, I'm not used to a luxurious car. Mine is...
is almost as old as me, so as long as it works, I'm happy with that.

Speaker 2 Well, Becca, you've done a great job. You're young.
You don't have any debt. You've saved up money.
You're working. I'm proud of you.
I think a $12,000 car is going to be just the thing you need.

Speaker 2 George, I love when somebody young calls in and they got a good head on their shoulder.

Speaker 4 It's fantastic.

Speaker 2 When she said she wanted to spend $9,000,

Speaker 4 let your budget drive what kind of car you get, not the kind of car you get drive the budget, because that's where we get it twisted.

Speaker 4 And we go, well, they upsold me and they said they can work with me on the payment, and then they end up with 20 grand in car loan debt at 23% interest.

Speaker 3 Right.

Speaker 2 Oh, my goodness. All right, George, we have time for a question from, let's go with this one from Noel on TikTok.

Speaker 2 okay he says should I put the thousand dollar emergency fund in a high yield savings account so it can grow instead of just sitting there

Speaker 4 I mean sure but grow is is relative it's about how much I'm gonna grow in height at 36 years old let me do the math for you right now you would get $35 in a year so three bucks a month is what you'd make if that hey if that gets you excited I'm happy for you.

Speaker 4 But I would park it. I mean, I would keep it in a high yield savings account just because it's a good place to keep it.
But not for the growth, but no, not for the growth.

Speaker 4 It's not meant to be an investment. This is your insurance policy against life throwing you some ankle bite or emergencies while you're trying to knock out the debt.

Speaker 2 Yeah, it's better there than like in your sock drawer or like you know, stuffed under your cushion because then you might pull it out if you're just running to 7-Eleven.

Speaker 4 Well, those socks get eaten up in the laundry, so your money might go with it.

Speaker 2 We don't want that. You work too hard for that thousand dollars.
High-yield savings account is great for it.

Speaker 2 All right, our scripture and quote of the day, Isaiah 55, 8 and 9, My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are my ways your ways, declares the Lord.

Speaker 2 As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts higher than your thoughts.

Speaker 3 What a flex.

Speaker 2 I know, right? Come on now. Albert Einstein said, Two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity.
And I'm not yet completely sure about the universe.

Speaker 4 Man, just classic, classic Einstein burn. The shade.

Speaker 2 Golly, I'll tell you what, man, he's right, though. All right.
Lauren is in Hendersonville, North Carolina. Hi, Lauren.
How can we help today?

Speaker 3 Hey, thank you for taking my call.

Speaker 3 Yes, I am

Speaker 3 in the final stages of tying up my dad's estate.

Speaker 3 And

Speaker 3 the first thing on the list is we're going to be selling possibly one of my dad's cars.

Speaker 3 And my husband feels that my inheritance is now ours because we are one and that wives are to submit to your husband in all things and he really wants me to sell the Lexus and I'm feeling very conflicted and

Speaker 3 I'm not at peace because I'm not ready to sell it I'm not sure what I want to do with it but I also don't want to be going against what my husband thinks is best so

Speaker 3 I'm hoping for some wisdom on how to handle this because this isn't just the first item. We've got a long ways to go.

Speaker 2 When did your dad pass?

Speaker 3 He passed away three years ago.

Speaker 2 Three years ago. Okay, so you've just been going through, you know, little by little and sorting through everything.

Speaker 3 Yeah, we ended up in probate, so you know how long that can take to get through things.

Speaker 2 Okay, so what all did you end up with? That's an

Speaker 3 so I have, I ended up with an investment account that's worth $390,000, an inherited 401k that's worth $300,000,

Speaker 3 about a quarter million in gold, and then a his house, which is worth about $1.1 million. Wow.
And then the car.

Speaker 3 What's the car worth?

Speaker 3 It's a 2018 Lexus LS400. I'm going to guess it's probably around like 45,000.

Speaker 3 I can't remember how many miles it has on it, but it's pretty low.

Speaker 4 It's the smallest asset in the entire estate, and we're already arguing about this. And you want to keep it for yourself and drive it?

Speaker 3 I don't know if, I mean, I wouldn't drive. My car is paid for.
I drive a 2018 Honda CR-V.

Speaker 3 So it wouldn't be like I'd be driving this all the time. I would still.

Speaker 3 What's the rush in selling it?

Speaker 2 Why can't you just keep it? Because you like it, and it reminds you of your dad. You got a bunch of money here.

Speaker 3 Do have an emotional attachment to it. So that's what I'm struggling with.

Speaker 3 and i think his concern is like the upkeep and where are we going to keep it which are all valid concerns okay i see um what are the ultimate goals that you guys had before any of this existed

Speaker 4 um our ultimate goals with the estate or with just money like were you trying to pay off debt trying to pay off the mortgage where are you guys at

Speaker 3 so um we were just paying off our car loans we didn't even own a home we were just renting and we actually bought our home with the life insurance that my dad left us.

Speaker 3 So we don't have any debt for that.

Speaker 2 How much was that?

Speaker 3 Our house is worth about $380,000.

Speaker 2 Okay. What's going to happen with his house? Are you selling it and going to invest the cash?

Speaker 3 I do plan on selling it. Yes.
I don't. It's in Atlanta, and

Speaker 3 I won't be able to, you know.

Speaker 3 keep that up or anything. It's more house than I would.

Speaker 2 So the true argument around the car, there's only one argument that I see which is we don't have space for it so I'm guessing you guys have a two-car garage and it's just sitting in the girl in the driveway blocking everything and it's annoying for your husband is that it

Speaker 3 yeah we actually don't have a garage but um yeah we just have our driveway um so the it is it would need to go somewhere um that is a hurdle if i were to keep it and i don't think he's excited about having to pay to store it somewhere or, you know, he thinks a lot of the responsibility would fall on him to keep it.

Speaker 2 Well, it's kind of almost like, I'd almost, if you did store it somewhere, if you did, I'm not saying you should, but if you did, it's like your grandfather, it's like your dad's paying for it, right?

Speaker 2 Since all this money came from him.

Speaker 4 I mean, you still have another $2 million that it will, you know, manifest itself here from all the other assets. What's your plan with that?

Speaker 3 I really don't have a plan yet. I do have, like I said, I have an investment account and I didn't want to get ahead of myself on what to do with it.
I was just trying to close up the estate,

Speaker 3 you know, before I figured out how to, you know, diversify it. But I really don't have a plan.

Speaker 4 Does your husband have ideas of what he would want to do with this 2 million?

Speaker 3 He does. He wants me to put it in stocks.

Speaker 3 Single stocks?

Speaker 3 No, I don't think so. I think they're group stocks.

Speaker 4 Like mutual funds, index funds. Okay.

Speaker 3 Right.

Speaker 3 I don't have any experience with that.

Speaker 3 I know he does.

Speaker 3 So, but yeah, I guess I'm just, I don't want to go against my husband,

Speaker 3 but I'm feeling very conflicted because I really am not ready to get rid of it, but I feel like it's going to cause

Speaker 4 these issues.

Speaker 3 So my husband's a stay-at-home, or my husband works for himself. I'm a stay-at-home mom.
I homeschool our six-year-old.

Speaker 3 He, on our last tax return, made about $15,000. He just works part-time.

Speaker 4 $15,000?

Speaker 3 How do you guys live?

Speaker 2 How were you living before you inherited this money?

Speaker 3 We're using my investment account money to supplement our income. But how were you

Speaker 2 received it? Did you have a trust fund before?

Speaker 3 I did not. No, he was working full-time at that point.
He's since I've received this money, he has cut back a lot.

Speaker 4 And is the game plan just to live off these investments for the rest of your lives and never work again?

Speaker 3 I do not think that that's wise. No, I do not want to do that.

Speaker 2 I'm going to give you some real talk right now.

Speaker 2 There's a thread in this that doesn't sit right with me from hearing you talk.

Speaker 2 And I'm just going by what I'm hearing you say.

Speaker 2 I feel like

Speaker 2 this money came from a loved one of yours, and it is your money. It's both of your money.
But it feels like your husband is feeling like, this is what I want to do.

Speaker 2 And so this is what I'm going to do. And it's almost like for him, it's a, it's permission to do what he wants to do, which is now I no longer want to work, even though you're saying, hey,

Speaker 2 I think you still need to work. This is just here for the family to,

Speaker 2 you know, for us to live on later. And it will continue to be an inheritance for our children, right?

Speaker 2 And don't get me wrong, there's parts of that that you can enjoy.

Speaker 2 But then over here, when there's something that you would like to enjoy, which is, I'd like to keep this car around, this reminds me of my dad.

Speaker 2 And if we have to store it, we'll just use some of the millions that my dad left us to pay for it. I'm fine with that.
But then over there, for some reason, he's not letting you do that.

Speaker 2 And I've heard you use a little bit of language that is kind of making me feel like it's being taken out of context.

Speaker 2 So I just want to tell you: like, you do have a vote in this, and you, and it's okay for you to say, I don't want to do that. And I don't agree with that.
And we need to stop.

Speaker 2 And no one needs to do anything until both of us agree, at the very least. And that's not being disrespectful.
That's just you being able to have a say and have a vote in what goes on.

Speaker 2 And it's okay for you guys to not do anything until

Speaker 2 there's mutual agreement. And that goes with

Speaker 2 working or not working. Like,

Speaker 2 I think you guys need to have some tough conversations and you need to let them know that you're not feeling heard in this relationship.

Speaker 4 And the truth is, he just thought about this longer than you have, of what he's going to do with this money. He has a little bit more financial literacy.

Speaker 4 And so your job now is to gain some financial literacy because you just got a whole bunch of wealth to manage. And that might mean you get some pros in your corner.

Speaker 4 You have a good tax pro, a good real estate pro, a good investment pro to help you figure all this out, to help you understand it, to help you make the right next move.

Speaker 4 And then you and your husband can get aligned based on all of the advice they give you and what your personal goals are. But right now, there's no real vision for this household.

Speaker 4 And so I don't trust him trying to control you with scripture when he has no vision for the family other than I'm going to make 10 grand a year for my hobby.

Speaker 4 And so I think we have a lot of things to figure out before we do anything with this money. The car is just a symptom of a whole bunch of problems underneath.

Speaker 4 So I hope you guys can get to the root of that.

Speaker 2 Yeah, what a gift, but allow it to be a gift.

Speaker 2 Don't turn that blessing into a curse by letting it pull you guys apart.

Speaker 2 That's for sure. Woo-wee.
All right, guys.

Speaker 2 Well, that does it for this episode, and remember, there's ultimately only one way to financial peace, and that is to walk daily with the Prince of Peace, Christ Jesus.