
Lucy Hale Opens Up: Getting Sober, Mental Health & Manifestation
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True alignment happens when we stop running from our darkness and start embracing all the parts of ourselves. Welcome back, my friend, to another episode of The School of Greatness.
Very excited about our guest today. We've got Lucy Hale, who is going to really open up and share in a big way about her personal experience of hitting rock bottom a few years ago and how it led to a spiritual awakening that transformed
her relationship with herself and became a turning point towards sobriety and her healing
journey.
And I want to remind you that we are all on our own journey.
If you might be struggling, you might be going through adversity, you might be uncertain
about the future, whether it be a relationship or your career path or some business you're working on. But I want to give you this daily affirmation.
And that is when my mind drifts to fear or lack, please remind me that abundance is always available to me. Remind me that I am supported, provided for, and surrounded by endless possibilities waiting to unfold.
Help me to see the blessings already in my life and to welcome even more with an open heart. Let today be a reflection of trust, gratitude, and the abundant life I am meant to live.
Again, you are meant to live it, but sometimes the darkness, the challenges, the adversities make us feel like we're drowning in stress, drowning in chaos, drowning in drama. And sometimes we have to break apart from the chaos, from the drama, from the stress, find some stillness, literally get still, turn off devices, turn off the TV, turn off the noise, and just be still.
Sit outside, breathe, be still, and allow alignment to come into alignment. Sometimes when we're in chaos or overwhelm or stress, we don't have the moment or just a moment to reflect to get back into alignment because we don't allow alignment inside of us because we're constantly reactive.
So get to a place of calm, get to a place of understanding and just be present in this moment because you deserve to feel peace and abundance. It is your birthright, but it's not going to be handed to you if you're not willing to do the work to create that inner alignment on your journey.
And trust me, I have gone through so many ups and downs in my life where I felt like, is there ever going to be any peace? Is there ever going to be any freedom? Is there ever going to be any abundance when I'm feeling fear, when I'm feeling scarce, when I'm feeling overwhelmed? And I'm telling you, it is possible that you've got to be willing to go within you. And there is some big moments in today's episode.
You know, Lucy talks about why external success and validation couldn't fix her feelings of unworthiness and shame. And she's a massive, you know, superstar.
She's got millions of followers. And the external success didn't validate her feelings that she really needed to feel.
And it wasn't until she went through her own journey, which she's about to talk about in this interview and episode, where she started to learn how to create that peace and come back to herself. And you deserve to come back to you.
The true essence of you is love, is peace, is joy, is freedom, is creativity. And you can't do that from a place of scarcity, stress, or overwhelm.
So I hope you enjoy this episode. Whatever you're going through in life right now, you deserve to live a free, harmonic, abundant life.
But you've got to be willing to do the work. And sometimes that's facing the darkness, facing the demons and not numbing them or running away from them like so many of us have done over the years.
I know I did it for a long time and I lived in a lot of pain. The more I ran away from it, the more I chased other things to try to fill me up.
It never worked until I turned around, faced myself, and started giving myself what I needed to feel peace. And again, if you're enjoying this at any moment, please share this with a friend, text one or two friends, and let them know that you heard this amazing episode with Lucy Hale on the School of Greatness.
And you want to hear their thoughts about it. You want to have a conversation about it and see what they learned about it as well.
So send it to a few friends. Make sure to tag me, Lewis Howes, and tag Lucy Hale over on social media while you're listening or watching this episode.
And I'm very excited for us to jive in together. So let's go ahead and jump in with the one and only Lucy Hale.
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Welcome back, everyone, in the School of Greatness.
Very excited about our guest.
We have the inspiring Lucy Hale in the house.
So good to see you.
What's up, man?
I'm so happy to be here.
This is, I mean, we've been trying to make this happen.
We have been.
For a while.
We have been.
I wouldn't call them roadblocks, but we had some, the universe said, not yet. Pause, pause.
The timing isn't right. And, uh, this is the right timing.
Yeah. And I think whoever's watching or listening right now is going to, this is going to help so many people, no matter what they're going through or how they're challenged in their life right now.
Um, because you have an amazing story. You've been in the public eye for the last, I guess, 15, 20 years almost.
You've had a massive career, millions of followers, tons of success. But for a long time, you had a lot of sadness and darkness inside of you.
And you were numbing yourself to try to overcome the insecurities that you were facing facing even though you were in the limelight and had everyone turning to you saying wow you're amazing or you're talented or beautiful or whatever it is but you had these kind of insecurities inside of you that I've heard you talk about and three years ago you talked about as a moment that was almost rock bottom for you or it was rock for you. And I've heard you talk about this openly.
But how can someone hit rock bottom a few years ago after so much success and so much fame and so much attention? What does that feel like internally? And how do you decide to start making changes so you don't feel like you're at the bottom, even when everyone else seems like you are on top? Yeah, I mean, it was a really unbelievably confusing ride to be on because externally, how I showed up in the world, my persona was successful on a big show, like cool clothes, good all the things right but then I'd go home at night and I had this like unbelievable guilt and shame for having those things really I did and I think that that was just a limiting belief I acquired at some point as a kid of thinking that receiving meant selfish or that receiving meant you weren't grateful. And like, I just had this idea that I needed to humble myself.
And so I, I felt really guilty for a lot of the things I had. And I, I want to say that that sort of shame.
To me, shame is the lowest you can get as a human. I think it's like the worst feeling.
I think it's a really scary place to be in and I want to say that that shame is what fueled the drinking and the numbing out because subconsciously I was sabotaging my life because I was saying I wanted success. I was saying I wanted a great relationship.
I was saying I wanted, um, you know, to be respected, but I was doing things at the time. I wasn't conscious of them, but I was doing things.
I was trying to implode my life because I felt like a fraud. Wow.
And now without getting too deep into it, I believe that we all have souls And I believe that my soul really needed to learn the lesson of unconditional self-love and unconditional self-worth and so I believe that my soul always knew I was gonna go through this and that I really do and I'm sure I could talk about this forever of like why I think we're here on the planet but but one of my big lessons was learning to love myself even though i had done things that i knew were out of alignment with my truth you know and and really like understanding why i was making certain decisions and like really getting curious about why do I want to sabotage my life? Why do I dislike myself so much? And, you know, and then it took the path of sobriety. And to me, it's sobriety represents so much more than just not drinking or doing drugs it represents getting to the core of the wound and then getting your life back in alignment um and it took like 15 years of trial yeah man like i i struggled heavily at the peak of my Success with the TV shows on Pretty Little Liars.
I was at my absolute
darkest most shameful and so like that um juxtaposition was unbelievable to me because and it's and it's really proof that you can have all the things you say you want and still feel empty because what was happening for me is i thought everything outside of me was going to make me happy i thought the job
the boy the money the whatever i was like this that's really gonna fix me and then shocker like
it doesn't um so yeah it took a lot of trial and error a lot of really trying it's not that i
didn't try i really really really always wanted to feel better and to understand myself more. And I had many rock bottoms though that would have appeared worse on paper.
Oh yeah. Oh yeah.
Some I'll take to the grave with me. A lot of rock bottoms, a lot of scary rock bottoms, a lot of really sad rock bottoms, losing relationships, you know, my own physical danger, losing my career, like all of these things.
But the moment I got sober, it was the first time I had experienced like a spiritual intervention because that's really, I could still cry thinking about this moment because it was so visceral it was where were you like what was it I was in Austin Texas okay I love Austin I need to go back and and and make new memories there but it wasn't like a crazy time like nothing really quote unquote bad happened you have like a near-death experience or like I mean I I had the past but this time it wasn't i just remember i woke up and it was almost just like i knew that if i did not change my life from that moment forward i was gonna lose everything really and maybe even my life like it was that it was that clear to me and it was a sensation i felt and i felt the presence of you know a higher power that loved me a lot and was like listen listen girl you know it's not too late because i i felt like it was too late because i had tried for years and years and years. What did you try? Was it like therapy and ayahuasca? Like I tried spiritual retreats and meditation, kind of all these things.
So I didn't start all the spiritual stuff until that's the place I'm in now. Okay.
But I mean like rehab, inpatient, outpatient, every type of medication. You know, I did try religion.
I tried everything, everything. And nothing really, nothing stuck for me.
And I really think that's because I believe patterns repeat in your life until all the lessons are learned. The same people will keep chewing up.
You'll keep making the same habits. Everything will continue on until you've like really rung out that rag of all the lessons.
And my God, for some reason, my soul is like, no, again, again, again. And I really did learn a lot about myself and, you know, through those 15 years of what I was running away from.
I mean, I didn't even realize until I actually got sober and like had the clarity and clear mind for a year, like how much sadness and rage and anger I was holding onto that was so old. Wow.
Like it felt ancient. And I, you know, that really is my biggest lesson in being sober is being able to speak up for myself and set boundaries for myself and honor my truth.
Because that is why I was drinking. I was drinking not because I like to take tequila shots and like run loose in the streets of L.A.
No, I was drinking because that in some weird way allowed me to be, to unleash these like parts of myself that I really didn't want to, I felt like I couldn't behave that way in my normal life. And so I do have a lot of darkness in me and a lot of depth and a lot of, I don't know, whatever you want to call it.
And, and it scared me, I think a lot of my life, but now I kind of run towards that because I think people who struggle in this way or struggle with anything, it's just because we're afraid of our own power and, and I'm not anymore. And I, if you can tell, I love talking about this because this was bottled up for a really long time because I was like, well, I can't talk about it because no one's going to hire me.
Like I can't talk about it. No one's going to want to date me.
I can't talk about it. People are going to be scared of me.
But when I first spoke about this a couple of years ago on another podcast. The amount of people that I have connected with and the amount of people who were like, that helped me get sober or that helped me realize like how I'm sabotaging my life.
And that's why we talk about these things. That's why you do what you do.
It's because it's so important to be that ripple effect in someone else's life. So how long were you using alcohol then to numb the pain or to numb the lack of ability to create boundaries in your life or speak up or really kind of like own your power? I mean, the funny thing about my old friend alcohol is that it starts out as a really good friend right like it's sneaky and but I want to talk to you because you don't drink.
I've never been drunk in my life. Okay I need to I'm gonna circle back around to this because is there any benefit to drinking? No.
Zero. Not for me.
Because I've never been drunk. Okay okay but not for me so this so there are certain
people who like it blew my mind that people could just have a glass of wine because if listy over here had a glass of wine like i'd be buying the whole place yeah your mom shots like two hours later sure i am an extremist which is a blessing and a curse but you can't say i ever didn't like go 100% with drinking because I went and and the other thing is I never knew if it was gonna be fun or if it was gonna be you know blacked out crying on the phone to you know someone I'm gonna regret talking to but I used alcohol yeah so it was a slow creep up. It wasn't, it was always very clear looking back in hindsight that I was a binge drinker from the beginning.
But I would say around like early 20s because I went to rehab at 23. Wow.
Yep. And I, that didn't work.
Um, it did for a little bit, but what really needs it, if rehab doesn't work for you or didn't work for you, what is the thing you needed to heal your soul or to get an alignment to say, I don't need alcohol to allow me to feel safe or whatever it is. Like, what did you need at 23, at 30, at 34, when you're in these kind of rock bottom moments where you turn to alcohol to numb or feel protected? What is it your soul really needed? I mean, I do believe in the divine timing of my life.
So at those moments, I did have what I needed. But I think what I really was craving was um I mean honestly like simply put I my connection with a higher power my spiritual I was spiritually broken is what I was spiritually bankrupt absolutely wow and that brought on more shame because even as a little kid I was like highly connected to God like I I remember speaking out loud and speaking to the universe and literally daydreaming about being in LA and I manifested that for my life and at some point along the way I just it's not like that left me I cut I cut myself off from that that connections always always there interesting as people we just forget suppress cut it off but i think what i really needed was well i needed to get scared is what i needed and that's what happened when i got sober i was scared i was very scared and not everyone needs that but i needed it was like someone was shaking me to wake up.
And so I had be so scared because i it's not like i wanted to die i wanted to live and i needed i needed my connection with something bigger than me and what scared you oh i just i was like do i make it out of this or is this going to be my life just three years ago ago? Three years ago. I'm like, is this going to be my life? Because I was just in this psych for years and I was so physically, mentally, emotionally tired.
I couldn't even, I literally couldn't even look people in the eye because I was so ashamed of who I was. Wow.
Because like there was just a moment in my life, all I was wear sunglasses because I was like people see right through me. I was just really lost.
Wow. Really really lost.
And the second I stopped running I was just tired of running. I was like for what? And what were you running from? I think I knew that there was like this box inside of me that I had like changed, locked up.
I didn't even know where the key was. I was like, no, no, no, it's good.
We can just like shove that down as far as possible. But I knew throughout all of this that if I just opened the box, sat with it, slowly unpacked it, that it would be okay because I knew that all the answers were there.
Interesting. My answers were all inside of me.
It's never gonna be outside of me. And the more successful you became, or the more in the spotlight, or the bigger the audience.
That was another way of numbing out. Of course, like let's do another movie, another TV project.
Oh, look, these people like me. Look at these followers.
Look, I'm number one on a call sheet. Like, and me preface with i love what i do my job has saved my life in so many ways the fact that i get to create and collaborate it just blows my mind that i get to do that but it was such a a fancy band-aid for a long time um because it was because my success was completely running parallel
with my struggles. Gosh, that's interesting.
It's really weird. It's really weird.
The more successful you became, you also felt more struggles piled on top of that. Exactly.
And I felt like my issues with alcohol or numbing out were getting worse.
Wow.
Yeah.
How did you function on set or in projects when you were numbing out at night every night? I was really clever about my ways because I wasn't drinking during the week because my job was important to me. But when I would go, I would go.
Like I was like you know the weekends are mine and and you know I they normally were blacking out and not remembering what I did and luckily I you know had people you know I was safe but um how I mentally and emotionally functioned I don't know like I have I have memories of being at work and Like truly having to walk away because I was like I was like people people know what's going on like I Wasn't there though like a part of me was not there because I was just it was survival It was like fight. What is it fight fight or flight? Yeah all the time Wow and I just now, before we started, you were like, you feel so grounded.
And I just now, after three years, my nervous system is like, oh, we can relax now. I was gonna say, your nervous system seems like more safe.
It does. More in alignment.
Yes. And you're probably, you know, you're really great at eye contact, but it sounds like three years ago, you wouldn't have been able to do this.
No, no, God, no. Because of the shame of someone seeing through you.
And I can relate to that growing up. Dealing with sexual abuse as a kid, I felt ashamed because I never told anyone for 25 years.
Yeah, that's such a burden. That if people really knew this about me, no one would love accept me and so i was in the let me perform let me achieve let me you know be great at something in sports or whatever yeah to mask the pain when did you start talking about that 12 years ago and did it feel like you could finally be yourself when you could no i felt like i was gonna die like i felt like it felt like I had to say it yeah finally but that my life is over because you thought people would I just thought no one would accept me people would make fun of me people would judge me yeah I mean but it actually the the you know the the pain the trauma once I started to process and heal and started to share it became more of a superpower to be able to connect and empathize and understand people and and be more relatable to other people who'd been through something similar yeah um but I thought it was going to ruin my business and my life and no one would ever date me you know all these things I was like everyone's going to make fun of me but it's true that when you truly honor your truth and live from the most authentic place because i had similar feelings i was like after i did the podcast i was like well my career's over bye bye hollywood you know but i was welcomed with so much warmth and so much love and so it actually i could still cry thinking about it because i never thought i was deserving of that and it just goes to show that when you honor that who you are there's no one else on the planet like you or me and when you live in that truth people they have no choice but they don't have to like you but they can say damn I I respect that.
Yeah one of the scariest things is being your most authentic self and people not accepting you but one of the most beautiful things is being your most authentic self and everyone accepting you for who you are. Yeah.
It's like makes me emotional thinking about it because it's I think it's what we all want acceptance. Yeah.
We want to feel seen and acknowledged for the human being we are. And when we have shame, guilt, insecurities, not enoughness, unworthiness inside of us, then we wanna hide and protect those things inside of us that are afraid from other people seeing that.
Or we overperform, or we people please, or we do things to not create boundaries of authenticity to try to be accepted within groups in society. Yeah.
And we become a different person, a different version that is not truly us, authentically us. And all we really want is to be accepted and seen for who we really all are, even all the mess in scary parts inside us.
And it sounds like you were masking that for a long time. For a long time, but also to add another layer to that, being your authentic self and not caring if people don't like you, because if you're truthful to you, like, and that's the best feeling for me, I don't know if you relate to this, but like, there's really nothing I would change.
I i mean there's always growth and evolution of self but there's nothing i would change about myself i'm not hiding there's no skeleton well you're taking some stuff to the grave i'm like there's something but like but you don't need to share everything with the world also yeah yeah but like i'm me and if you don't like what i'm saying turn it off off. If you don't, don't follow me.
But like,
this is me. And I can sleep at night knowing that I'm truly in alignment with hopefully one of the better versions of myself.
Yeah. And then something that just came up for me is like, yeah, we don't need everyone else to like us as long as we like us.
And it sounds like for 15 plus years, again, correct me if I'm wrong, you had 10, 20, 30 million followers who loved and liked you, but you didn't like you. Yeah.
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That's C O O PO-P, sleepgoods.com slash greatness. So what's the point of having hundreds of millions of followers adore you if you can't love you? Yeah, it really ate away at me and it really messed with my head.
I now look back and I'm so proud of, I mean, even though I handled it in a specific way, I am so proud of that juxtaposition because it actually should have gone worse. You know what I'm saying? Because of how I felt.
And I really, I've always kind of felt like in my life that I am kind of this like lone ranger.
Like I want to do it myself.
I felt a little misunderstood in my life. And I definitely felt that way during that period of my life.
And yeah, just like reflecting back on how I used to feel. It feels like almost like a different lifetime ago.
But I can still, it still resonates. but you know I still there's still things I struggle with of course but it really is the best gift to say you know what I did it's not even oh I yes I love myself but it's more like wow I really did my best today where can I do better tomorrow yeah like who can I apologize to like is there any way to like clean up my side of the street how do I challenge myself more and now I'm just obsessed with you know I I want to know more about myself and I want to speak more with people and connect more with people it's yeah I'm like border my friends bless them they're I'm like they hear me talk about all the different things that i try like i'm obsessed with spirituality and self-help and um definitely i've funneled my addictions into that but i think it's better it's better yeah it's better than alcohol yeah i would eat disorder or something i still love caffeine sure sure i love a Coke, but let me have my Diet Coke.
Exactly.
There's a quote that you shared that I want to talk about.
And you said this.
I made the choice on the morning of January 2nd, 2022, that I was going to do everything I could to get sober.
I knew that if I continued on the path,
I would have lost everything I cared about.
It was the scariest choice in my life,
but also it's been the best gift. When I made the change, everything else changed.
My whole life has changed. And again, we were talking about how this is like little over three years now on the journey of being sober, but really what it sounds like the journey of committing to being in alignment with yourself.
Yes. And when we step into alignment and allow our nervous system to heal, we don't need these things to make us feel better.
We don't need extremisms of alcohol on the weekends or extreme foods or whatever it might be to feel peace. It's so true.
And that to me is, I don't even like to use the word sober sobriety because to me it's, yes, I am sober, but it's less about not using drugs and wait, using drugs, drinking alcohol. And it's more, I love myself and my life so much.
I would never do anything that's going to threaten my peace. And that applies to people.
That applies to environments. That applies to substances.
That applies to everything. My peace and a calm nervous system is my top priority.
And so it's more about, like you said, anything that's going to shift me out of alignment, I'm not doing it. I'm sorry.
There's no, it's not even an option. Yeah.
You mentioned that when you were growing up, you felt connected to God. You would speak about God.
You felt connected. You're either listening from a place of openness to God.
And then it sounds like when you got to LA and you started getting into the industry, God kind of, you kind of either blocked god away from you or just
focused on the material world more rather than the spiritual world it sounds to me like as you started to heal the little girl inside of you yeah and reclaim the version of you that little child inside of you that is that had that wonder and possibility and pure light and joy it sounds like like you've gotten closer to God in your own version.
What has that journey been like for you reconnecting to God and reconnecting to little Lucy inside of you that was really a channel of spiritual joy? Yeah. I feel like this whole journey has been i'm not a changed person i'm just going back to who i always was it was like coming home to myself it was like and you know and we all experience that like life happens happens heartbreak happens and it's like we just get all this stuff piled onto us and we're like wait i wait, I'm in here.
Like, please come find me. And so I always have felt really connected to my inner child.
And, um, but I knew that my inner child or little Lucy, like I took on a lot of stuff early on. And so I knew that a lot of my healing was, and I think that's why I avoided it for so long is because I knew that I was going to not have to live in that space again, but have to really acknowledge what I felt and what I went through and who did those things.
And it's just, I was like, I'm not dealing. And you know, for 20 years, I was like, I'm not dealing with it.
But what I realized is nothing's ever as scary as we make it up to be in
our head and you don't i was like now now i realize i don't have to attach to those stories that we like i was giving so much of an identity to alcoholic victim i was complete victim mode and And we don't have to do that.
Real healing lies in letting, feeling it, you know, and then completely letting it go. Half, not even half, all of the stuff that weighs us down are not our burdens to carry.
None of it's our. And so.
Why do you think you made it your burden to carry? I think when you're a kid, you just do. You just do.
Kids are pure. You know, it's like, oh, you have no choice really.
And then I moved to LA young and grew up really quickly. I was surrounded by adults.
I was making a lot of money early. I like, you know, it's just kind of an expedited childhood.
I didn't go to high school. school I didn't go to college and so there was a mixture of like wanting to be normal mix intertwined with all of that as well um when did you move out here but I moved out when I was 15 so I've lived here for 20 a little over 20 years wow yeah you really grew up young I did I.
I did. I mean, I guess.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah. I was like, yeah, this is definitely.
But all that being said, I feel like the journey of my life, it still would have been the same thing whether I was back home or here. But you feel like it was amplified here though, maybe? Probably so.
But this ties back to my soul had a you know has a plan for me there were book markers i needed to reach there's a million different ways i could have reached those book markers that's free will right but but i needed to learn some lessons and you know they're tough tough lessons but yeah i really do believe i would have dealt with similar themes maybe just you know not in the public eye exactly yeah there's something you mentioned earlier you you talk about you know whenever I saw I see you resharing some of the stuff on here specifically about manifesting or with Dr. Joe Dispenza and kind of these fan.
Yeah. I don't know if you've been to one of his events yet.
No, I want to.
He came and spoke at Summit of Greatness last year here in LA.
If I'd have known you, I'd have had you come out, but next time.
Next time, yeah.
But it sounds like you said earlier that when you were a kid, you were just dreaming and manifesting, coming to LA and having this career and getting these opportunities.
And it sounded like you had a pure channel to God to be able to manifest your dreams and really go for it. I think so.
And of course, as a kid, I didn't have the vocabulary of channel or manifesting, but what I, I thought I was just a really elaborate daydreamer. That's beautiful.
But to the point, cause I spent a lot of time alone as a kid. I didn't have many friends.
I just, I genuinely loved being alone because then I could be in my head and I could create these environments that made me really, really happy. And so I did a lot of music growing up.
So music was always my emotional valve and just that really got me through some stuff as a kid. But yeah, I mean, I have memories of being in my house or backyard or whatever on my trampoline.
And just knowing I was moving out of the city I was in. I knew I was destined to do something big.
I knew it. And even at this point, I didn't even know what an actor was I was just like and this isn't you know talking bad about where I come from or my family I was just like I feel kind of like a a square and a you know what's the saying like round hole yes I was like I love my family and but something's not right here I always just felt like the black sheep of the family, just in how I viewed people, the way I dressed, like my interests, everything.
But yeah, now I look back and I was like, dang, I knew how to manifest. You did.
As a little kid. Well, here's the interesting thing, because you manifested your dreams as a kid when it seemed like you had more possibilities in your mind and you were, I guess, closer to God or having a different relationship with God.
But then when you were in LA and you started to go down a darker inner journey, you know, externally you kept manifesting still. You had opportunities and money and audience growth and it's like gig after gig.
So what's the difference between manifesting from a pure connection to God versus manifesting from a darkness and a disconnection from god so okay so there's a couple elements to this now do i believe in man you don't have to believe in manifesting it is law but i feel like my destiny as a person was always to be in la so does that make sense so So like even if I was in a bad place in my life like my soul wanted to be here but I would say the biggest difference in manifesting from it's like I was manifesting things and they would happen but I'd still have the feelings of unworthiness really yes and what's really interesting about like I manifested some things after Pretty Little Liars, and it was a couple of TV shows. And I'm talking, I did like three TV shows in a row that got canceled.
And I was like, but you know what it was? It's because I had this limiting belief that I didn't deserve. what you had already before what I had already or that I had already peaked or that, you know, and so I was manifesting jobs that weren't going to follow through.
Interesting. Oh my God.
And we were talking about like money beliefs earlier. Everyone read this house book.
Um, um, but like I've had to really reestablish a healthy relationship with money and with success and realizing that success doesn't equal bad or evil. To me, more success equals, wow, I get to connect with so many people or wow, I get to create content, movies, TV, films that's really going to help people or entertain them or give them a break from their day.
David has really helped me with all of this stuff. And so my life has felt like a series of trial and errors, like most people's, but then I realized, oh my God, I realized my part in it because we are manifesting every second of every freaking day.
And the biggest, like if anyone takes anything from this podcast it is get really comfortable with your thoughts and make sure you're focusing more on the positive than the negative I feel like what I realized was I was latching on to so many negative limiting beliefs that were really hindering my my growth as both an artist and a human. Interesting.
And I was blaming other people. That is the worst thing you can do is say, well, I'm not getting this job because this person is not working hard enough for me.
And it's like, no, no, no, no, no. We are so in control of whatever we want to create.
And that's a scary concept for a lot of people to accept. A lot of people don't want to accept that.
But it is my belief. It is my belief that we are master, master creators.
And we are so powerful. And like how cool that, I mean, look, I'm sitting here.
Like two years ago, I was like, dang, I really love this podcast. And I was like, I can really see myself on this podcast.
And here I am. But we're also manifesting little things like a cup of tea.
It's just, I love it. I think it's fun to play.
Once you get familiar with how it all works, it's fun to. Now, but you mentioned something earlier about like, you like you were a victim for a long time, right? Like you were living in victim energy.
Yes. Obviously, you were creating stuff.
And from the outside, you know, people didn't see your failures. Even though you had three shows that didn't extend after the first season or didn't get picked up after the pilot or whatever.
Yeah. But everyone else on the outside is seeing you win, except for maybe close industry friends hearing about something.
Like, oh, it didn't work out for you. But it's not like you were living in a victim energy inside of you.
And it's because you weren't feeling worthy or deserving of the success or like, I've already received too much success and I shouldn't have received that much anyways. Yeah.
When did you start to shift out of victim and unworthiness energy into hero or main character energy? Yeah, I love that. And into I am deserving and worthy of all the blessings that come to my life.
Yeah. How did you shift that energy from I'm undeserving to deserving? I mean, I feel like it was around the time I got sober.
I mean, definitely a year or two before I got sober, I started having these like little glimmers of hope or like things were really connecting for me spiritually or like how I was getting in my own way, how I was contributing to this sob story or like contributing to my own suffering, you and that is the biggest wake-up call a soul can have is when they're like oh my god this is my part in why i'm in so much pain because i think it's so easy for us to just like blame blame blame blame so you're blaming who like managers or agents or like studios or no i mean i think i was just yeah it was like people around me or other people in the industry or you or like studios or... No, I mean, I think I was just, yeah, it was like people around me or other people in the industry.
Or you were saying like, oh, this girl got it because of some other reason or what? Yeah, it was like, oh, I'm not, I don't look a certain way or I'm not a good enough actor or like, what are these stupid stories that we tell ourselves that aren't true? Like I was just giving my power away too easily. And all of that started to shift when I, first I had to get clear headed, right? It was like, okay, stop drinking, stop doing all this stuff and just like really let's get back in alignment.
And I had to be really clear headed. And you know, the first year of sobriety was really about just in my environment changed, the people I was with changed.
The second year was... Because you're not hanging out with the same people who are drinking on weekends.
My whole life completely changed. But I have been lucky that a lot of, like my family, I have some, all of my closest friends have been my friends for years, years, years.
And they were, you know, stood lot of my life changed look different the second year was more about like okay i need to integrate into the world and have fun but i was you know i can't like sit at home in my house all day with my dogs although it's pretty fun too though and then the third year so the year i just came out because i'm in going to my fourth year, my third year was like everything changed. Really? Last year? Everything I had bottled up came to the surface.
It was like I got hit with everything one after one. And it was like emotional whiplash.
And luckily, work was, I had a lot of time last year to deal. You know, it how those things I was like thank you universe because I really needed time to sit with it and if you're working all the time you don't have time to sit oh it's like I'm busy like I'm booked and busy I don't worry about my like emotions or whatever like stupid but I had the time and and it was during that year where I realized oh like if I change the way I think and I believe it and I embody that like I can change everything in my life and so so what were your thoughts like on repeat for two decades before you started to change your thinking it was it wasn it wasn't all bad.
Like there were moments, I think I've always had like an innate sense of purpose. Like I, I always was like, I'm here to do something important.
I haven't always known what that is, but I've always had, I always feel like I've been very open and I've had a good heart. Like I wasn't just constantly like shitting on myself, you know, but, but I think a lot of the limiting beliefs were, um, playing small.
I thought I needed to be really quiet. Really? And just, yeah.
Yeah. Really.
I thought, because to me, the limiting belief of speaking up, setting boundaries, speaking your mind, I was like, oh, that is a troubled woman. Like, that is too much.
A theme in my life for all the girlies listening, I feel like it is a similar theme with women feeling like we're too much, too emotional, too complex, whatever it it is and I really tried to make myself small and and it worked because I'm like five foot two I'm like I'm physically small and I and I just need to be the nice girl and I need to be really polite and I need to do what people tell me and then then you know I'm going to be accepted and loved and adored whatever and it did kind of work for a while but I felt I didn't feel like myself because I do have opinions and I do have ideas and I know what I want I definitely know what I don't want and it's so fun to be able to stand in a place of power while also being kind I think I think I thought if you spoke up you were not kind, but it's just not true. There's a way to do it.
I think the most powerful human in the world is someone who can courageously share their opinions and create boundaries in a kind and conscious way. 100%.
Not screaming and reacting and like, get away from me, but actually like, you know what you just did? Like that doesn't work for me. And I want to let you know, maybe I'm misinterpreting something, but I need to have distance from you for a while, or I need to create this boundary, but like actually having the courage to disappoint someone and have someone not like you in order to create safety within you is one of the hardest things to do.
The courage courage to be disliked like that is powerful but guess what you're actually doing things right if people don't like you because living in your truth and be i have found that when i've been and it's kind of what we were talking about earlier when i have felt the most aligned been speaking my truth like emanating my inner light i it triggers a lot of people. Oh yeah.
Oh, it triggers. I've had the amount of people it's like, are like there's a couple of people online that were like, I don't believe her phony, but it doesn't phase me because I know who I am.
So actually if you're pissing people off or people don't like you, you're doing, you're doing something right because there has to be duality to everything.
Not everyone's going to love you.
Not everyone's going to adore you.
And actually it's took the pressure off of me because I felt like I had to do
that.
And I'm like,
it's too tiring.
You don't need everyone to like you anymore.
Yeah.
And you can just be yourself.
Yeah.
It doesn't mean you want to like try to piss everyone off.
No,
no.
And I'm like,
please love me.
Please love me. No, it's, it's's it's a good balance that's great another quote you have uh talking about this whole journey this was on i think um a three-year anniversary post after getting sober you wrote this on instagram it said i began my journey and remembering who i am since then i've experienced moments that can only be described as and magic.
Yeah. What are a few of those moments in the last three years since being sober that have been miracles and magic for you? I think for me, I struggled a lot with being present in every sense of the word.
I think that's why I like being an actor is because I'm forced to be very present. And I connected those dots.
I was like, oh my God, that's why I gravitated towards it as a child because it took me out of my head and I could just focus on whatever I was doing. But my life, there's so much stillness in my life the last couple of years.
And I'll just have these moments where it's not anything profound. I'm just like sitting, drinking my coffee with my dogs.
And I'll just be so moved to tears by how great I feel. It's almost like I can't believe I'm so comfortable in my own skin.
I felt really afraid of myself for a long time. I was afraid of my choices.
I felt like, you know, I felt like a wild card. And so to just be really, no, it was.
Really, you just didn't know any day you could be just something wild or crazy? Yeah, I mean, sober me, I was, but I was a people pleaser. And so I just never, I felt like I was trying on all of these different masks and none of them really felt like me.
And so now I just like what I meant by that, that quote about miracles and magic is I feel so connected to myself and I feel connected to my, I call them my team, my, my, my, my guide team up there. And I just am in awe of what I've been able to do.
I'm in awe of other people. I feel like I so much empathy for people and what everyone's fighting silent battles.
We know nothing about. I mean, I'm like the perfect example of that for, for for ten years and there were so many people who I don't have resentment towards them but like they just didn't know what I was going through and that's why it's so vital to be kind to always be kind and I don't think I would have garnered that amount of understanding or empathy had I not gone through what I've gone through.
And I don't think and I don't mean like enable people. Right.
But like we don't understand anyone else's point of view or what people are going through. So just be patient.
Do you feel like you were kind and patient with others? Um, at moments, yeah. And then I would get mad that people wouldn't show up for me.
And so, so then I'm like, oh, was I only doing those things to get something in return? Cause that's not actually giving. If I'm giving my time or my energy just cause I want them to show up for me, that's selfish.
That's people pleasing. And so that was a big wake up call for me to be like, oh my God, am I not as good of a person as I thought I was? Because people pleasing is actually selfish.
Like you can still be a good person, but it comes from a, yeah. And if I act this way, then I'll be accepted and loved and adored.
That was most of my life. It was like trying to fit in or trying to make people happy, especially in intimacy.
It was like, I felt whenever I was single, I was so joyful and I felt like I could be my authentic self. And then six months after getting into a relationship or nine months, for whatever reason, I would choose people out of a wound.
I'm not making these people wrong. I would choose them out of a wound wound where they never accepted who i fully was and they wanted me to change to make them feel safer or more comfortable or whatever and then i would change to please them and then i resent myself i resent them i resent the relationship but i was like i'm going to try to do whatever it takes to make it work and then i couldn't get out of the relationship because i was like i invested all this time and there was like a cycle like a cycle.
And you were like attracting the same type of, same person. Like, this is what I mean about the lesson.
We'll keep repeating until you, until it got really painful. And then I was just like, I almost had a similar wake up call where it's just like, I can't live like this.
I've repeated this five, six, seven times now over like 15 years or something. And I've got to look within.
Yeah. I've got got to do some healing work i've got to create boundaries in a conscious way i've got to learn how to say no i've got to learn to not people please all these things yeah so it's about four four and a half years ago when i started the healing journey for myself in a different level i started healing 12 years ago around sexual abuse yeah but then four and a half years ago around intimacy and relationship, around the people pleasing.
And that's when everything started to change for me. Talk about miracles and magic.
I mean, it's like I would not be able to create a sense of peace inside of me without doing that healing work. And I know you talked about healing the inner child for about a year during my healing journey.
I had a photo on my phone of my you know like eight-year-old self right and so every moment I looked at my phone I was reminded to reclaim yeah the boy inside of me and to say you know what I'm like he was screaming at me through eczema or through chest palpitations through like pain in my chest through feeling like someone was choking me it's like the boy inside of me was saying take care of me yeah trying to get your attention stop neglecting me and recreate that integrated healing of oneness of all the parts of me and it wasn't until I started to really heal the little boy in me and turn around and face myself and the darkness and the wounds and start integrating, that's when the pain left my body. It's, that's so powerful the way you just worded that.
And I did talk therapy for many years and we did a lot of inner child work. A lot of inner child work, a lot of like meditations where i visualize myself as a little kid even for my it's an it's interesting to do for other people too because if you're angry at someone if you do a meditation or you can even journal about it envision their inner child power you can't be mad it just like so you see a little girl little boy who's hurt or sad.
Everyone's wounded. We're all wounded.
Okay. The thing I just posted today says the irony is that your light grows brighter.
The more you embrace your darkness. Isn't that crazy? The only way out is through.
It's so, so true. And, um, what did you learn about little Lucy when you started doing inner child healing? What did you learn about what she needed most that you were neglecting for her to receive? I think as a kid and still sometimes now, I think definitely as a child, I didn't feel like I had emotional safety.
Or I like i was i was a very emotional child very complex um didn't know what to do with these big feelings like i'm talking like really questioning some big stuff as a small kid and what'd you question like purpose of life like i felt i remember telling my mom when i was very small i was like i feel like I'm gonna die really I feel like I'm I'm gonna die young I'm talking like three four years old crazy stuff and so there was a darkness there there was a desire to um to know and I was curious about a lot and I and I and I never really felt like I had a lot of people to connect to and I'm sure like seeing a kid with like that kind of energy probably freaked people out, you know. As an adult, it's cool as hell.
Like I love it. I love that about me.
But as a little kid, you know. You didn't feel emotionally safe.
No, I felt like if I were to express what I was truly feeling, there wasn't always an outlet to go to like i i i spent a lot of time in my room crying because like that is where i felt safe to like actually be myself and i think that's also why i spent a lot of time alone i also want to say my parents are amazing by the way i'm not saying it was just i don't feel like it was very different than a lot of other kids I knew and um and that's why I think music came into my life because I think it became this like safe space for me but I but I also think if I were to be sitting next to little Lucy I think she just wanted to be understood and seen and able to cry if she wants to, able to laugh if she wants to, like just free. I think I just wanted freedom.
Why did you not feel free? I think without going too deep, I, how do I word this I think a part of me was really scared of what I was feeling my intensity I still get scared of my intensity sometimes but also I um my parents were divorced when I was young and so I think when something like that happens for a kid around like four or five, I didn't understand what was happening. But of course I'm absorbing the energy of that.
And I wanted to make my dad and my mom happy. And so I was like a shape shifter.
I could do whatever I needed to do. I realized early on, if I acted this way, that made certain people happy.
If I acted this way, it made certain people not happy. So I'm not going to people not happy so I'm not gonna do that so I'm just gonna be this person and so I maybe took on some emotional burdens really young once again no anger or resentment towards that at all anymore I've sorted through that but but also I think even before I moved to LA I was just I was growing up quickly and this is And this is a lot of people's story, right? Like I'm sure as parents, I'm not a parent yet.
I'm sure when you're a parent, you're going to screw up. You're going to mess up.
They were doing the best they could. And I have been really lucky that they've been very, my sweet mom, she's been so patient with me over the years.
And I've always been very supported by both my parents. I think at times maybe not understood by them.
I think we're all different people. But I have a really good relationship with my mom and a good relationship with my dad, too.
I see my parts of them in me. I definitely know what I've gotten from my dad and what I get from my mom.
And it's such a nice place to have forgiven. This is what I mean about not blaming.
How many people do you know are like, well, my so-and-so did this and that's why I'm this way. It's like, okay, keep telling yourself that and you're gonna keep being miserable right so I was like I'm gonna stop blaming all the characters in my life when did you start stop blaming everyone the last couple years really yeah I mean this is new I and how does it feel I mean because almost when you're blaming others you're a victim to what they did this is what I mean about the victim mentality it was that's what it was like was like, oh, well, I came from, I'm a child of divorce.
It's like, yeah, Lucy.
So it's like 90% of America, you know, like get over it, deal with it.
Don't, don't, don't, don't wallow in it anymore.
Okay.
That's the cards you've been dealt.
What did it teach you?
Everything's a learning experience.
Everything that happens to you, good, bad, ugly, pretty, whatever, is there to teach you. If you choose to take that route.
And I do. It's exhausting sometimes.
Sometimes I'm like, ah, ignorance is bliss. But as you know, once you're on that path, there's no looking back.
You don't stop. You don't just say, nah, I'm good here.
No. Keep climbing.
Keep going. Yeah.
It's tough because once you've, I guess, started to heal and get out of, and really take full responsibility for everything and create meaning from the past pain, not saying it's okay, what things happen to you, but say, okay, this did happen and I can either be a victim to it or I can take, create meaning from it and see how I can be empowered from it. Exactly.
Once I do that, uh, not excuse people's behaviors or whatever, or actions, but once I take meaning, that's what I was going to say. Like with your experience, of course you didn't deserve that.
Of course people don't deserve for those things to happen to you. Absolutely not condoning that.
But it's like you, I'm sure you've had to say, okay, this is what happened. I didn't deserve it.
And you've obviously taken such a beautiful path with it. Yeah.
And you can, well, I can either stay in victimhood and let that anger fuel me, which I did for a long time. And it created results out of anger and out of frustration and resentment and feeling abused and taken advantage of.
So I was driven to prove people wrong. Wow.
And it got results. Anger is probably the second most powerful fuel in the world.
It will get you what you want. So true.
But you won't feel the way you want to feel once you get the results. Right.
You're not going to feel love. You're not going to feel peace.
You're not going to feel alignment because you did everything out of anger, revenge, proving, you know, I'm going to show them, I'm going to do something as opposed to I'm going to show up for the greatest version of me and live an empowered life to serve and inspire people around me and really step into the version of me that I'm most excited about that wants me to become something greater. And I think when we can step into that energy of like, this is a goal and a dream because it's going to help and serve others in the pursuit of this dream, it's just a fuel that is more renewable and it feels more peaceful.
Yeah. So wait, so it's anger.
Because I agree with you that anger is not necessarily bad. But I also believe there's like a spectrum of emotions, right? Of course.
And like you can't go from shame, depression, all the way to like bliss. You have to like work up the ladder, right? You've got to learn through the ladder.
You've got to learn through the ladder. It's better.
Yeah, but I do agree. Because you can only live in anger for so long.
Like's not sustainable well an anger causes so many disease and cancer and frustration and hurts and you react in the different ways that you're you know you're like I wish I didn't say that yeah you have to repair a lot more from anger it's so true you're so much more reactive and you're kind of like blowing and blowing through relationships and burning bridges you're just like ah you know yeah And so you can get results, but is it going to be a rewarding life? It's so true. And I think the true reward comes from healing and feeling whole while you create.
It doesn't mean you can't tap into the darkness or tap into the memories of the pain, but I think living in that space is very painful. What do they call it? Emotional alchemy like transmuting it transforming it transmuting it yeah that's power yeah it doesn't mean I'm like gonna be perfect every day I'm gonna have frustration and anger but it's like how can I get back to a place of love and peace and calm yeah really alignment that's so true and I think that you know when people haven't seen me in a while, oh my God, you're just, you're doing great.
And I'm like, I am doing great, but it doesn't, just because you make certain choices doesn't mean that every day is just glowing, glittery sunshine. I mean, there are days where I'm like, I feel like I'm on drugs because I'm so excited about life or passionate.
Like, no, it's just like oh, I'm having a really bad day, and I'm going to let myself have a bad day, and then I'm going to let it go and have a better day tomorrow. And not stay in victimhood for too long.
Oh, yeah, because it's easy. Oh, God, it's so easy to latch on to it.
Yeah. Yeah.
Now, how do you navigate? I mean, we don't have to talk about this if we don't want to, but how do you navigate? Is it about dating? Relationships in general was like relationships in general yeah yeah it doesn't have to be about intimacy but yeah when you start to heal knowing what I've gone through in my past relationship journey of getting into relationships out of a wound yeah versus getting into or being open to relationships out of wholeness or the journey of wholeness. How have you reflected on that when you think about previous relationships? And I don't know your dating history.
That's not what this is about. Well, how long do you have? It's not really about who you're dating or who you're not or whatever.
It's like, how do you navigate your vision for a relationship that you want and creating that in your mind, daydreaming again in your mind about the type of relationship you want intimately or personally or professionally and creating from that space of vision around values and around a person who's also on a healing journey or who's got growth mindset, not in victimhood or not being attracted to people who have shiny objects about them, but more attracted to their spiritual alignment. Have you thought about that in terms of working relationships, but also intimate relationships? I think about it in every type of friendships, family dynamics, romantic relationships, even people that I'm hanging out with just, you know, for a little bit, definitely working relationships.
I think all of those have changed astronomically when I started putting myself first, because what happens, yeah, let's go. But I think it's, it's the type of people I was attracting in my past were people who were of a similar wound or were going to trigger my wound.
I was like caught in that cycle. And that's how the universe works.
I'm not a scientist, but like Billy Carson can tell me how that works, right? I also was attracting, you know, some relationships without getting too specific that weren't for my highest good um but now oh i think about this every day but but it's almost like i don't even need to worry about who's coming into my life as long as i'm true to me because if i'm embodying the person i want to be with if i'm living from a place of love of integrity of value of passion whatever though I can only attract people who are that a mirror of that no one else can even break through that barrier and if they do I recognize it very quickly and I'm sorry but they got to go yes because like I said my where I'm at in my life work too hard I have a zero tolerance for people who aren't going to elevate my life yes I'm not pulling people up. I can connect.
I can support. I can be there.
But especially in intimate relationships, like we have to be of the same mindset. There has to be like a similar outlook in the world.
Like spirituality is very important to me. But yeah, I feel like I'm very clear on the type of people I want to spend time with.
Definitely. What are those values you look for then with someone that could be an intimate partner or a professional relationship? What are the values that they need to embody for you to feel like this is alignment of just being in a relationship with you? I feel like transparency is super, super important to me.
And I feel like when I have that, everything else is okay. Because if you're being honest and transparent with me, like I can believe your word.
I've been in so many dynamics where, you know, especially in LA, people are like, oh, you, yeah, you know, they'll tell you one thing and you never hear from them. And I mean it's more of I don't know if it's exact values but I'm seeking out people who are on a similar path as me who are actively working towards um getting to know themselves more um connecting with other people um but yeah I don't know how you feel, but when you're on this path, like it's not that I don't want to say it's hard because that is a limiting belief that it's hard.
It's just it's I feel like I'm in a phase of my life where it's weeding out the things that are not supposed to be a part of my life anymore. So cleaning it up, cleaning out,, cleaning house.
It's interesting. Transparency is so key.
And I really think it's just pure honesty. Like everything you say is an honest thing.
Yeah. And you're being authentic to the moment.
And when I started, you know, when Martha and I, my wife started dating, she was asking me like very, you know, just honest, real questions from the beginning. And I go, are you sure you want to hear the answers?
Because people usually don't like certain answers of past stuff I've been through or whatever it might be.
And she goes, yeah, I always want to hear the truth.
I go, okay, well, I'm going to tell you the truth about everything you asked me then.
So be ready.
But we'll see how you react.
If you react where you're like hurt or upset or like angry about something in my past, then it doesn't work for me. Like you have to be willing to receive and accept all of me in my past.
It doesn't mean that's like what I'm doing now, but it's like you got to understand all the complexities of me. And she was, and so from the beginning, I was just like, you sure you want the answer? She was like, yes.
And I would tell her the answer to any question. And she was really great at not reacting with like negative or positive.
Just like, thank you for being honest. Even if it was like hard for her to hear something, she was like, thank you.
And she didn't scream or react or run away or anything. And I think when you can be fully transparent with one another, your word becomes powerful and you can trust the person.
Right. But when you're not transparent and you're hiding even little lies here and there.
Yeah. It adds up.
It adds up. And then you're living like two different lives.
Yeah. You know the truth inside of you, but you know you're not sharing that fully with the person in front of you.
Right. And I think, you know, this ties back to what little Lucy needed.
Like I'm, I'm desiring emotional safety and for someone to look at me, look at all parts of me, everything I've done, the woman I'm becoming, the woman I am today and say, I freaking love this woman. Like I accept all parts of you and just feeling really, um, safe.
And I think that that for me, like, I'm not going to go into my astrological chart, but like emotional safety is so important for me. And to feel seen in that way is like top top.
What are the things you do for yourself on a daily basis to create emotional safety for you? So I know my, I hate this word, but I know my triggers. Oh, it's so overused, but I know my, uh, like fault lines.
I know what's going to take me. So it's really important for me to start my day with like pure energy.
So I do my best to wake up. I'm not reaching for my phone, like social media.
I wish I could be one of those people where, you know, I look at social media for three minutes and I don't think about it, but it's not. It like, my brain goes, I'm going to grasp onto, you know, I'll just spiral.
So I try to, you know, I stay off my phone. It's important for me to have a really intentional morning.
And by that, I mean, whether that's meditating or outside walking with the dogs or just time where I can I mean I call it prayer time but you can call it whatever talking to the universe talking to yourself and I get really clear on what my soul wants me to do that day I literally ask what do you need from me today and so sometimes i'll like journal out just like stream of consciousness writing and sometimes i hear really specific things like go do go drive this way to get coffee or go to this coffee shop or sometimes i hear nothing and that's okay but i've been really leaning into learning to trust my intuition and really just getting comfortable with that and getting familiar familiar with what my higher self is trying to to tell me to do but you know I'm also really intentional about the places I go the people I see um I love what I do so I love being busy with work but yeah I'm just very intentional about what I'm gonna step into and if I do have to go somewhere where I know it's gonna be overwhelming or maybe not somewhere I'd necessarily go just protect myself with that white light and I go and then I all you know what I do every day when I get home from like being around a lot of people I shower just get all that energy off and I just literally imagine and going the drain. So I do like a lot of cleansing stuff.
That's cool. I do sound healing, meditation, all the things, energy work, Reiki.
I'm obsessed, obsessed with astrology right now. And for me, it's, it's important to remain curious and playful.
I think I, I think we're all like, as we get, obviously when we get older, we lose that, like, childlike curiosity. And I find that I'm happiest when I'm, you know, researching about some very niche topic.
So I try to stay curious. What about, I mean, I think that's beautiful.
And playfulness is, I think, the key to staying young. Yes.
It's being playful. And you hear a lot of actors who are like, it doesn't seem like they age.
And I feel like it's because you get to play all day you're like playing character and you're playing fun and you're the role playing and it's just like a yes and mentality it's not a block it's more like let me keep trying let me keep exploring it's make-believe it is yeah what is you know i keep hearing you talk about you know your practice. Do you hear messages from God? What is, what does God speak to you on a consistent basis? What are you hearing God say? I mean, it's more of, sometimes it's not like specific words, but it's more of a feeling of just, have you ever experienced this where you're just so overcome with gratitude that you have no doubt in your mind that you're in the exact right place in your life? And that's more what I feel these days.
Like when I, when I was going to do the podcast and then saw you at the gym, it's like moments like that, like that is God. God orchestrates things in your life to let you know you're on the right path.
Yes. The synchronicities, the signs are always there.
Um, so it's more of just feelings. I get goosebumps all the time.
Like that is how I know I'm in alignment is it's usually only my left side. It's really interesting.
Um, what happens if you get goosebumps from the right side? I'm screwed. It's a bad day.
Um, but I do hear but i do hear um you know sometimes in meditations i've heard some interesting things like i've heard do i go here yes okay i heard yes so um i i've heard like names um i i really have i i heard a name in a meditation and i had no idea what this name was but i heard heard it very loudly. And I was like, I don't know what Doris, who is Doris? So I called my mom, like put it in my notes app and I called her the next day.
I was like, mom, do we have a Doris or a family? She was like, yeah, honey, that's your great grandmother. Wow.
Yeah. So I feel really connected to people who have passed and I feel like it's hard for me to be still.
It's hard for me to quiet my mind but when I do the stuff that comes through it was really profound yeah now people are gonna be like Lucy talks to dead people I wish when was the so you moved here when you were 15 yeah when did you feel like you started going off alignment off the rails yeah kind of just like all right maybe it was small to start but then it's like what age do you feel like okay i wasn't in that pure light consciousness just much anymore i was starting to like be more in the material world not the spiritual world or going through the dark side a little bit more internally yeah probably like 18 okay i think that was around when i was living on my own and i started making and i'm not saying that living on your own and making money and success equals bad but for me um yeah it was around that time i was living on my own and my career was taking off and um if you don't have the right influences or environment around you you could easily sway into other influences yeah but it's also like if you're a teenager right we were all doing that for a while everyone was wiling out everyone was staying up all night um and so i would say around like 18 19 20 i had the moments of my behavior is a little different than everyone else's and oh I'm seeing some videos of myself and that seems really scary or like the desire to want to continue the party and I don't even like calling it partying because that makes it sound like it was enjoyable but like to continue to I guess like the benders started because I was you know was this just alcohol or drugs and alcohol
or just mainly alcohol but towards the end it was also drugs yeah yeah and there was there any like eating behaviors or oh well so yes so that was actually my first kind of addictive behavior was I like undiagnosed, but I definitely had issues with it.
I had a from like 13 to mid 20s and i actually think it was the eating disorder that fueled the drinking really but one of the reasons because i obsessed so much about my weight and you know the amount of calories or how much i was working out that when i drink I'd eat whatever I wanted and I didn't think about anything and I thought I looked decent enough to go you know it was it just like really you know it gave my mind a break from all of that and so I think it was a reprieve from interesting that turmoil yeah and so it's like two extremes yeah like during the week i'm counting calories
and obsessing about what i'm eating and then on the weekend i'm drinking whatever and eating whatever yeah as a kind of a release yeah and that's pretty common for people with addictive behaviors that you'll channel it into something different so um so the like the 15 years where i was on and off sober i did have long periods of sobriety but the eating disorder would kick up And then, you know, so it was constantly being fueled.
One addiction to the next.
Yes. on and off sober I did have long periods of sobriety but the eating disorder would kick up and then you know so it was constantly being fueled one addiction to the next yes and that's really common so a lot of people that get sober will fall back into ED territory or what smoking a lot of people you know my I got addicted to sugar I'm still kind of addicted to sugar but a lot of people like early sobriety will just candy candy caffeine caffeine you know what i never
picked up though smoking it's probably shocking it's a good thing shocking i don't know i i was like um in my mid-30s i can't start now there was a moment where i was like should i no yeah yeah maybe you're 21 it's different yeah yeah yeah interesting okay so 13 is when the eating disorder started around yeah that's when i remember starting abnormal thinking what do you think that is is that more of just like trying to fit in in school or is that more the stress from home life control i think i think i felt emotionally out of control i i saw things happening in my environment where that were really uncomfortable and so i don't want to speak for everyone but a lot of people I know who who have struggled with disordered eating um it gives them a false sense of control of their life and it's like the one thing that's theirs when everything else feels like it's wow out of control and it got really the the eating disorder got really heightened when I moved to LA. I mean, shocker.
Because then it was not only the control thing, it was also, I want to be an actress in LA. And I felt like I needed to look a certain way.
And the truth is, I didn't. The truth is, those stories we tell ourselves are not true.
I mean, maybe a different time in the industry but right I'm sure I would have been accepted and loved had I not been doing that but but what's crazy is that I had the eating disorder booked all the jobs so I was like well it worked and so then it like further fuels these negative behaviors it's kind of like the thing you're saying anger will get you places it's kind of the same mentality because i you know i was drinking and doing all the stuff had the eating disorder but i was still getting results the prize but it didn't feel as good as i thought it was a false reward yes and then you still don't feel like you still have the shame inside of you you still have the unworthiness the not lovable or you don't love yourself aligned you're getting things out of alignment god it's it's so this is so interesting i talk about this in my book actually where it's like money doesn't solve all your problems or neither does fame or all these different things they don't solve they might solve money problems yeah they didn't solve self-worth problems made them worse actually it almost's the thing it does. When I was broke on my sister's couch for a year and a half and then I started to make some money after building a business and it took a number of years.
I started to make some money. I was eventually on my own and I saved enough money where I was financially free for a couple of years.
Right. I could live and not work for a couple of years and I had enough money.
I wasn't like balling for life, but I could live like under my means and be fine for a couple of years. And I'd worked so hard to create this financial freedom, but I still didn't feel emotionally free.
And so I remember it was almost worse than being broke and emotionally broken because you think the job or the followers or the money is going to make you feel more free or more lovable or more enough and it almost expands your level of unworthiness it's such a hopeless feeling I know this feeling so deeply in my soul and it was always like I have these benchmarkers where I'm like okay if I just book a job yes then then I'm gonna be happy and then I'd get the job and I'd be like, yeah, well, maybe. It needs to be bigger.
And it's like, when does it end? It doesn't end. There is nothing outside of you.
Does money make life easier? Yeah. Does a great job make you happier? Yeah.
Is it going to fix the broken parts of you? No, never, not ever. The only thing that can do that is you
and your connection to something bigger than you.
The only thing that's gonna make you happy
is already within you.
You don't need to seek, search, make, spin.
But then the great news is the byproduct
of doing that work and getting aligned
is then you get the jobs, then you get the money,
then you get the people that actually
are in alignment with your truest self. And you can actually celebrate those moments.
Yes. And it feels good.
Finally. I never celebrated my success.
Wow. Like when I would accomplish my goals after like 10 years of going for it, I'd be like, okay, what's next? I know.
Like we got to go bigger. I know.
It was never like, let's take a moment. This is something I love about my wife.
She's all about celebrating the moment. Like any little or big like success.
She's like, we got to go to dinner. We got to have a weekend celebrate.
Let's take a trip. And it's, I have to get used to celebrating.
I'm like you, but I think that celebration energy is good. Cause it allows you to reflect on how hard you worked, whether it was three months on a project or three years.
It's like, man, look how far you've come. We can celebrate a small win and a big win with equal amount of reflection.
It doesn't need to throw yourself a massive party, but you can go out and have dinner or go on a trip or whatever it might be and just say, man, I did it or we did it or let's talk about all the memories from what we created together. She's really great at creating that.
I mean, she's Mexican and Mexicans celebrate every birthday party. It's like everything's a celebration.
So I really relate to that, though, because but also like your mentality is why you're so successful, because you're like, OK, cool. Now what? And it's good.
It's drive. It's passion.
And I really respect that. And that and i feel like i'm that way too but remember how i was talking about being really present i'm trying to really take a moment whatever it is each day where i'm like that was cool oh i liked that interaction or whatever it is it's so important to be grateful because the more you're grateful the more you find things to be grateful for and then the more you find more things to be grateful for.
And so gratitude to me is the secret sauce of life. If you could go back 20 years to Lucy that had this dream that made it to LA and then booked the gig and then all these things start happening.
If you could go back 20 years and you could sit across from lucy of 15 what piece of advice would you give her knowing all the emotional uncertainty that you were experiencing in that time the lack of emotional safety that you had the maybe the the stresses you had at home whatever was going through we don't think we don't have to talk about but what advice would you give yourself 20 years ago before you started to break into the industry and have the success and fame that you had? What would you say to her? Oh, I'm just tearing up because I, you know, I wouldn't have changed anything. I wouldn't have because I, I love who I am today.
I really do. But I would tell her how deserving, do I say me or she? I would tell her that she's deserving of good things, good people, healthy love.
I'm worthy of everything that's coming my way. And just to never lose sight of that.
I think that that is what so many people struggle with is this like not feeling worthy. And I don't know why we all kind of have that little inkling, but we really are.
And I wish without changing anything, just to remind that version of me how powerful my mind is and that at any second I can tap. I could, you know, like we were saying earlier, like that connection to something bigger than me never went away.
And that all I need to do is just like brush off the dust, you know, shine it a little. But that connection's always there.
But yeah, I think that version of me just needed a big hug and needed some support and needed, yeah, just needed that emotional foundation, I think. But I got through it.
Yeah. I got through it.
And not only did I get through it, I got through it, I think, maybe even more than my soul intended to.
I think my soul is like, okay, okay, you can calm down, but I'm just, I love this path I'm on.
I literally wake up and I'm like, I'm obsessed with my life.
Yeah.
It's beautiful to be in.
Yes.
And it doesn't mean I'm not, I still have things I'm working on.
I will always be doing that. I don't know.
I'm in a good place. And it's not just because of me.
I've also been very blessed with unbelievable resources and true guardian angels and friends and just pillars of strength and people who have been guiding lights and loved me when I literally felt unlovable. And that I do not take for granted at all.
And what if Lucy, again, this hypothetical scenario, you're having this conversation with your 15-year-old self. What if she looked back at you when you said this to her and she said to you,
but how do I feel worthy? I Hear you saying you're deserving and worthy, but I don't feel it. Yeah, how do I believe I'm worthy? I mean, I don't think we as people I mean, I don't know how I would explain this to her but as people we don't have to earn our worryliness that is our birthright that is what we are on this planet we are that is unlimited you know and i that's such a tough question because like how do you get through to someone who's like how do you convince yourself the thing is but this is why i think things happen exactly how they should because i've only been able to understand that I'm worthy through experience, through trial and error, through falling on my face, literally and figuratively, and realizing that I've always just had this voice that was like, no, you deserve more, try again, try again, try again.
And I realized that not everyone has that, but that is such a hard question. How do you tell someone that? Especially your younger self.
How do you tell her? I don't know. What is she just like, I don't believe you.
I don't believe you because I don't feel it. Like, how would you get through to yourself 20 years ago to believe you were worthy of all of this? But I think I always did know.
I think there was like, I'm not, it's, that's, that's such a hard, what would you say? That's such a hard question to answer. That's why I'm asking you the question.
I know. I'm like, wow.
I think it would, I, you know, I literally just thought of this in the moment. No, it's a great, it's a great question.
Because, well, here's, here's what I would say. I'll answer that in a second, imagine there's a you know 18 23 year old 28 year old watching who is like just been driving and maybe they've had some emotional challenges in their life and they are like hooked on the edge of their seat listening to this or watching this because they can truly relate to what you've gone through and they really look up to you and see the career you've had and now they they can relate to you and say, oh, but she's actually been through a lot that I can relate to personally.
What would you say to that 18, 23, 28 year old watching or listening who doesn't believe they're worthy? How would you try to get through to them? I mean, I think it's like, we shouldn't fake it through life. Like don't say things you you don't mean like like i feel like if i were to tell my younger self be worthy i'd be like but i don't it's it's it's a slow burn you know you don't have to say like you can't go from feeling depressed or sad or struggling to automatic bliss and life is amazing it really is to me it's like this is a two-parter.
To me, it's like, this is a two parter to me. It's like the more you focus on what is going right in your life, you're going to keep finding more things that are going right.
And you're going to keep finding more things to be grateful for as much as you possibly can focus on what is going right. And the things that are going wrong will dissipate.
I literally promise. And I understand people are in different circumstances and scenarios, but as much as you can, try to see, find the good thing, write them down.
Wake up every day and say, some days it might just be, you know, look at that ray of sunshine or, you know, these sheets feel nice. But some days it'll be, wow, I met the love of my life or it will grow and grow.
And so I think that like finding ways to be grateful. I know people used to tell me this all the time and I wanted to tell them to shut up, but it works.
It really, really works. And also I think a lot of people feel lost, don't know their identity, don't know where their place is in the world, feel so misunderstood.
A lot of people are living in shame. I relate to all of those things.
And I think however you can, find out what makes you uniquely you i like we always forget that how incredible it is there's eight million people on the planet and there's only one of each of us i firmly believe we all have a purpose i firmly believe we all chose the vessel we're in i firmly believe our our soul wants us wants great things for all of us um and so I think it's just like living and finding your truest passion and not letting choose yourself every day. And don't let anything get in the way of that.
Always choose you. I don't care what anyone says.
Let them call you selfish. Put you first.
Always. Get in alignment with yourself first.
Everything else will fall into place. Yeah.
And as I'm hearing you say this, I'm thinking about what would I say to myself? Yeah. Did you come up with a great answer? I feel like you did.
Yeah. From all these.
I mean, because I lived in a lot of shame. I lived in a lot of insecurity.
And again, my parents got divorced when I was, I don't know, 15 or 16. But they probably should have been divorced when I was five because it was like chaos.
It was emotionally at home yeah i left home at 13 to go to a private boarding school that i found and begged my parents to send me away for months they did not want me to leave so i left the 13 to create a sense of safety essentially to run away yeah because i didn't feel emotionally safe i knew my parents loved me but they didn't love each other yeah there was always dis-ease within them. And therefore that I felt the energy of their stress.
And that caused a lot of emotional instability inside of me. And so when you have, you know, parents dynamics, sibling dynamics that are whatever, friend dynamics, bullying at school, whatever it might be, it's hard because you're in an environment where you don't feel lovable.
You don't feel seen. You feel taken advantage of or neglected or abused or whatever it might be.
And I feel like I needed to get out of that environment to create a sense of freshness, newness, safety. But I still have the traumas that I carried with me into a new environment.
Yeah. But everything you were talking about makes sense to me.
And it's probably what I would say to myself is one, if you want to feel worthy, you have to do, you have to live in full integrity every day. Integrity is everything.
And you have to be willing to disappoint people with your integrity. Meaning you're going to be honest with people and they may not want to be friends with you.
Yeah. And they may speak bad about you behind your back.
They may gossip about you. They may do mean things to you.
And so you're going to, you may cause frustration or, or emotional instability outside of you, but it's never worth doing that inside of you to create peace externally. There is another quote.
Here I go. It says something like, disappoint as many people as possible as it takes to avoid disappointing yourself.
And I was like, that's a heavy hitter. I can't take credit.
Whoever wrote that on Instagram. And I was the opposite.
I disappointed myself first in order to try to not disappoint everyone around me. People pleasing 101.
And it caused so much pain inside of me and resentment and anger and frustration. Because I felt like other people weren't showing up for me the way I was for them, like you said.
Yeah. And I just think if I could have learned to be alone and be happy with myself, I could have been fine with a couple friends not trying to have everyone like yeah
i also feel like because i i'm a person that needs an action sometimes i'm like i can't just sit so so you know like sit and like expect the answers to come but i feel like what i'd recommend to people is like literally having the awareness of wanting something different or wanting more that is a beautiful seed planted and ask pray if you don't if it's not prayer yeah talk to the wall i don't care talk to yourself write it down if you desire to want to find the answers in your life i swear to you they'll show up yeah and it's all there the answers there. They've always been there, but your awareness might not have been able to find them.
And I think prayer is something you've said two or three times. I think I would have told myself to stay in prayer, even if I'm not getting the answers, because I think I would lean towards pleasure to try to remove pain from my life.
So I would seek pleasures to feel better and try to numb certain pains. And I think sticking with prayer, even just a few minutes a day, even if I don't get the answers I need or I'm looking for, or if it takes longer to find the answers, stay consistent with prayer, stay in high integrity with myself.
Even if it means disappointing people around me, especially my parents, like doing those things. That's scary though.
When you're younger, you don't want to disappoint your parents. So it's learning how to, it's a challenge.
It really is. And also being patient.
Like sometimes we don't know best. Sometimes there's a bigger plan for your life.
So that's true. Keep at it.
Consistency is key for sure. A couple of final questions for you, Lucy.
This has been powerful. Thanks for opening up.
This has been great. This has been, you know what happens is when I'm in these conversations, I will leave and not have any memory of what I've said.
Well, let's say it's recorded so you can watch it back. It's a good place to be in, but yeah.
A couple of final questions. What is a limiting belief? Let me go.
Let me, go let me let me think about this okay okay if you go 10 years in the future okay we already had a conversation with your 15 16 year old self yeah 20 years back if you could think 10 years in the future of the woman you're going to become over the next 10 years and all the lessons, the growth, the awareness you're bringing into yourself and into the world. What is the one piece of advice your 10-year-old self in the future will give you in this moment that will help you overcome any limiting belief you might have right now? Trust the timing of your life.
That is simply it. Sometimes I try to play God and I'm like, like well I know best and it needs to work out this way and if it doesn't work out this way then it's wrong no no I firmly believe when you surrender to the timing of your life magic unfolds magic happens I have seen it when I've released the reins when I said okay I'm co-capt I'm still on the ship, but you've got a better plan than me, higher self, God, like take over.
And there's such a relief in that. And I've really been trying to embrace that.
And I really believe the next 10 years of my life is because I'm in alignment. I'm doing all the right things.
I know it. I'm doing my best every day, trying to, and when I don't, you know, I apologize and I try better next time.
But now I think the next phase of my life is really trust the timing of my life and I'm really gonna try to challenge myself more, do more things that scare me, and really be okay being more visible. And by that I mean not being afraid of world perception or what people think of me.
I feel like that is not what's tying me down. I just feel like there's going to be so much freedom and just being like, okay, I did this.
Let's see what happens. Does that mean expressing yourself or like using your voice or doing certain projects that maybe aren't populated or whatever? Yeah.
I think all of it, just living risking risking be a bit bit more of a risk taker but yeah trusting the timing okay yeah what would you say what would you say it's your 10 years in the future i would say um for whatever reason for me it's like i don't want to regret not going for my dreams like when i'm older i don't want to regret saying uh you could have gone for it but you're afraid you played it safe yeah now i don't want to neglect responsibilities in my life as well so it's like can i fully go for my dreams and show up for my wife and you know my future family and all these different things but i don't want to be 60 or 70 or 80 and say gosh you just you're afraid you're afraid to go for it yeah and it doesn't mean i'm going to accomplish every dream but i don't want to just look back and think you didn't even try yeah out of fear so it's similar to what you're thinking like be willing to go for it and it's
i feel like i'm living that i'm doing these things that are scary but i just don't want to live with regret of not going for it yeah i'm with you like accomplishing is a different thing but not going for it i can't live with yeah aligned so yeah that's yeah that's my thought i don't see that for us. Exactly.
Well, you're writing books and changing lives.
We're having fun.
And everything for me is, you know, it's different.
Whereas when I was younger, I wanted to, my dreams were about accomplishing things for me.
And now my dreams are about pursuing the things that I feel called to do that may have accomplishment tied to it,
but doing it in service of others and the boy in me that has a dream isn't that amazing that what when you do because i feel the same way like when i'm honoring that inner child feeling but knowing that it impacts others in a positive way like that's the best yes that's the best feeling and letting go of the the need to be looked at the accomplishment or the award or the success and being people praising me for that more of like just being inspired by the journey and if the results come great yeah but it's like making a difference making an impact and serving people in an empowering way is the ultimate path forward. Amen.
And however that looks.
Yeah.
What is the thing you think your, you know, 45-year-old self will be most proud of that Lucy did over the next 10 years? Oh, I think she'll, I mean, I think it might be similar to what I was saying. I think, you know, I'm really setting the groundwork for the next phase of my life.
Like I really feel like, you know, I've, I've, I've not only closed a chapter, like I'm in a whole new book and you know, I, I loved the first book. I hope it's a bestseller, but like we're on to the second part of it and um and i feel like i'm really uh i'm really doing the things i feel like are best for me in the long term and and i don't mean like the practical physical everyday things i mean like i'm getting my mind trained i'm ready ready like and it really does take commitment to be like oh i just had a thought that I don't I don't think it's for my best interest let's like divert it this way and that's like mental tennis you know and you're like Rocky in Russia the training montage like just doing the reps because I know that I have to do that because I know what I want to achieve and I know where I want to go and I already see see myself there that and to, to, to be able to already embody that feeling, I know what's going to happen.
And so it's easy for me to put in the work, put in the groundwork when I know that I'm,
that I'm going to be there because, you know, Billy Carson could explain this as well, but like
everything exists at the same time anyway. So I'm my little me, I'm my present, present me,
and I'm my future me all at once. So here's a question for you then.
Okay. What is the biggest dragon you're going to need to slay in the future? My mind.
That your mind is training for now. Okay, wait, wait.
What is the biggest thing you're going to need to overcome and conquer in the future that your mind has been preparing you for that you're going to say, do I take this call to adventure? Do I take on the dragon? Do I go on this journey or do I stay comfortable at this new place that I'm in this new comfort zone? I love that question. It's very easy for me to be like, no, I like it here.
It's really cozy and safe and I'm good. But no, I have this insatiable desire to keep going.
I just have this feeling, you know, I'm obviously going to keep acting and I love what I do, but I have this feeling that in the next decade of my life, something's going to shift and change, like an element of my career. And I know that I need to be really dialed in and ready for it.
I have literally not one clue what it is. I couldn't tell you.
I believe it has to do with speaking, connecting with people, service. You know, it really is a passion of mine, connecting with people.
And so I need to be ready for that. So the dragon that must be slayed is being afraid of visibility.
I think like it's so interesting. You're a public figure.
You have millions of followers. You're on TV, you're movies.
You're visible. But that's a persona.
But a lot of that's a persona. It's not your authentic voice.
Well, I feel like I do show up as myself, but there is a part of it. It's not your words.
Right. And I have had this whole thing my entire life of like, look at me, look at me.
And then everyone looks at me and I was like, why are you looking at me? It's kind of, and that that is just me in a nutshell. Interesting.
It's doesn't make sense to me at all. How both of those things could exist at the same time, like desperately wanting to be seen, but in a genuine way, but also feeling exposed when I end.
And so I'm really thinking, that's why it's like so to be having these conversations because we're talking about a lot of a lot of exposing vulnerable yes um things and um and i and i'm not a character no and i and and i'm showing up as me and just like learning to be okay with it and like not second guessing anything i said on my drive home today you know just knowing that whatever i said was the right thing that needed to be said. And, um, yeah.
So the dragon would be slaying the dragon of fear of being fully seen. Yes.
That's and getting like backlash for your true authentic voice or something. Exactly.
Um, this has been powerful. I don't want to take too much more time.
I've got two final questions questions before i ask them okay uh i know you got a lot of projects going on i think you posted something on netflix or one of these platforms recently yeah well you've got lots of projects happening can you share what you're working on what you're excited about yeah so um i have a movie coming out well we have to finish it first but it's called white mars and it's a sci-fi thriller yeah Yeah, I see that. Very fun.
That will probably come out next year. Okay.
And you're filming here? In London. We filmed part of it in Italy last year and so we have a few pickups to do.
And then the release you're talking about, we didn't even know the release was going out, but it's a project that's in development at Netflix and it it's a book that I first read five years ago and it was the first it's the first project I've been a part of from the very beginning where I was like I have to make this into something and you know it was a true it's a true story of believing in something and good things take time because it's been you know five years of assembling the right team and you know Netflix is obviously a dream like such a dream place for it and I'm doing a rom-com in Ireland this summer called Princess and then a few other things that I possibly it's a little too early to say but but I will say I love where my career's at.
And when I started putting myself first,
my career only blossomed as well.
That's just like a great byproduct of choosing yourself
as other things start to flourish.
That's beautiful.
So all these projects, some are coming out soon,
some coming out later.
Yeah.
But if we follow you with Lucy Hale on Instagram,
is that the best place to be up to date? If you want to see pictures of my dogs, like me spilling my coffee, me talking about astrology, yes, that is the best place to find me. Okay, cool.
Awesome. This is two questions I ask everyone at the end.
This is called The Three Truths. Okay.
We've already hypothetically gone into the past and into the future, but another hypothetical scenario. Imagine you step into this next book and then many more books you write in your life.
And you get to write all the books you want, literally and metaphysically, I guess, as well. But at some point, you can no longer write any more books and your story ends in this earth.
Many years in the future. Yeah.
So imagine you get to live your life, accomplish all your dreams, learn all the lessons, but it's the last day on earth for you. Far in the future.
Okay. And for whatever reason, on this last day, you have to take all of your work with you.
Every movie, every project, every podcast interview, anything that's ever been said, written, or produced by you, gone. Okay.
But on the last day, you get to leave behind three final truths. Three lessons that you know to be true from your experiences that you would leave with the world.
And that's all we have to remember you by. Okay.
What would those three truths be for you? Wow, that I've learned. Just your life.
What would you want to leave behind? What would you want to leave behind as lessons to the world? Things that you would say, here's what I learned, and here's what I share as my lessons. I feel like one major thing is we are all so connected in ways that we can't even possibly imagine.
I'm talking from the trees to the animals, especially humans. and there is a oneness that I've experienced that when once that like light bulb goes off for you like so much of the I don't know I feel like when I discovered that like it just made me have so much empathy for other people just realizing like we all share
a consciousness and like your success is my success your pain is my pain you know for better or worse we're all connected and i think that like never losing sight of that is really really important because i think we we grow up in a world that wants to separate us by religion by politics by culture, clothing by whatever it is and that dividedness causes obviously a lot of pain and chaos but we are also connected okay that's one um um okay and the other one this is hard this is hard two other truths I would say that i mean i already kind of said this but we are the creator of our own realities we can take full control there's no need to you know blame anyone else but we our minds are so powerful and just like really remembering that innate source energy that we all have. Like it's there.
And I get so excited when I see people I know tap into it. And then the third, oh my gosh, I'm having to like go to the depths of my brain.
Repeat the question one more time. Three lessons you would leave behind.
Three lessons. There are no mistakes in life.
There are things we could do differently with the knowledge we have, but there are no mistakes. There are no coincidences.
I believe everything has a purpose and a place and a lesson and everything is always working for your highest good. That's beautiful.
Yeah. Lucy, before I ask the final question, I want to acknowledge you for your journey of getting into alignment for yourself, of working on healing your nervous system.
And I know it's a constant journey, but it sounds like it was two decades of a lot of emotional uncertainty with all the success and the fame and the money and the attention you felt, it sounds like inside of you, you were still emotionally out of alignment. Very much so.
And so I want to acknowledge you for waking up for yourself and getting into alignment and feeling that sense of peace in your nervous system and healing, because I only know that this next book you write in the world is going to serve people in such an empowering way. So I'm so excited to see what the journey is for you and how you show up in full service to yourself and to others and starting to bring your voice to the world.
I'd say you putting your voice out more and sharing more of this is going to only help more of your audience or anyone else that doesn't know about you and care more about these things. So I acknowledge you for the journey that you've overcome, the journey you're on and the journey you're going to be on.
And I'm excited to put this out there as well for the world to hear. Thank you so much.
It's important to take those moments and really, I needed that. Thank you.
I really appreciate that. Of course.
Yeah. Final question, Lucy, what's your definition of greatness? Oh, my definition of greatness is okay.
How do I wear this? I feel like my brain, I see like blocks of thought, but articulating it is so hard. It's okay.
My definition of greatness is recognizing that your greatness is going to look different every day. Some days your 100% is going to be 50% a different day.
And some, and just always knowing that that's okay. Like, and always knowing that, um, I mean, it just goes back to that alignment thing.
Like being in alignment is greatness, you know, and you make up your own definition of what greatness
is. That's what's great about being human.
We give meaning to things. So like my meaning of
greatness is going to differ from yours. It's going to differ from everyone else's.
And to me,
that is greatness. Like how cool that we can have our own definition of things and
perception of things. But I think, yeah, for me, it's, it's recognizing
whatever greatness is to me, it's going to look different on any given day. And today it's
good conversation. It's being open, meeting with integrity, my favorite word.
It's not being afraid
of the scary, you know, and just showing up as me, like showing up as yourself is the greatest gift
you can give the world. That's it.
Lucy, thanks for being here. Appreciate you.
Oh my God. Dream come true.
It's powerful. Seriously, dream come true.
I hope you enjoyed today's episode and it inspired you on your journey towards greatness. Make sure to check out the show notes in the description for a full rundown of today's episode with all the important links.
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And I want to remind you if no one has told you lately that
you are loved, you are worthy, and you matter. And now it's time to go out there and do something
great. I know.
And that's commercial break.
Nice.
Ooh, hear that? My neck cracked. So satisfying.
Speaking of satisfaction. And that's commercial break.
Nice.
Ooh, hear that?
My neck cracked.
So satisfying.
Speaking of satisfying, I just used a Clorox toilet wand.
Ooh, with the cleaner already in it?
Yes.
All in one, the brush just clicks on.
Click.
Then you swish, swish, swish.
Ah.
And pops right off into the trash.
Just click. Swish, bop.
Clorox. Clean feels good.
Clean feels good.
Oh, we're back.
Use as directed.