E553 Grace O'Malley

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still be the return of the rat tour today's guest is an entertainer out of the boston and new england areas of america and i got to see her backstage the other night when she was performing stand-up here in Nashville, Tennessee. She got

her start with Barstool Sports, and I've been a fan, and I'm looking forward to get to learn

more about her. Today's guest? Yeah.
Oh, damn. I wish, I wish, huh? Oh, it's good, yeah, thanks.
I wish my mom would have gotten laid more, I think. Yeah? Oh, yeah.
I think she was, I don't know if she was making love to maybe this auto mechanic one time. I don't know.
He would always come around and look around at us. A lot of undercarriage.
Yeah, I think, yeah, he was just, I don't know what he was doing. He might not even have been a mechanic.
I mean, it was in our town. It was like, if you were greasy enough and kind of, you know, people would do mechanicing in their yard, you know, type of thing.
Where like, come drop the car off in my house. And people would do a lot of like, at home mechanicing type stuff.
Like you're it. You've got the car now? Oh no just like

it was like

like people didn't have to have a real shop

to be a mechanic. Oh gotcha.
Alright cool.

You know so people could just do it at home.

Oh I never come empty handed to anything

but I've been in limbo all day so this is the best I can do.

I heard you're on again

off again quitting. Damn you brought

me this. Air bar.

I heard sometimes you quit and sometimes you're not.

But mostly you're trying

to quit so I feel like an ass

Thank you. off again quitting damn you brought me this air bar i heard sometimes you quit and sometimes you're not but mostly you try to quit so i feel like an ass but no it's nice of you very sweet of you this is very um yeah it's almost like the first thanksgiving or whatever you know whenever they did that yeah so that's very nice yeah and i've actually been doing good think the tough part is, uh, the, the worst thing about quitting is that you have to, every day you're like, I'm going to quit.
And then you don't, and then you, you, you set yourself up for failure. Yeah.
It's a, it's a commitment that I just, uh, I don't have the willpower to do. Yeah.
Have you tried it or no? I was supposed to start dry January yesterday and I just didn't. Yeah.
I couldn't. I didn't have the willpower.
Yeah. And I wanted to stop this going on so we're going to try again today.
You got it. Yeah, it's another day.
Yeah, yeah, that's the thing. January's a lot of pressure, you know.
It's a lot of pressure at the beginning of the year to get it all right. Yeah, but for what though? Like we're just new all of a sudden? We're just going to flip it off? Well, I think that's kind of the goal.
I think that's the goal. It just feels kind of tough, you know lot of pressure It is a lot of pressure dude God being alive is just damn It's a lot sometimes You know it just feels like a lot Grace O'Malley thanks for coming in today Thanks for having me I'm super pumped I tried to play it really cool the other day But I am a very big fan Very big fan so this.
Very big fan. So this is very sick.
Yeah, I'm a big fan of yours, too. You always just seem like such a human.
I mean, why not? Yeah. Like, I don't know what's wrong with half of these people.
Everyone's kind of fucking out of control. Yeah, things are, huh? A little bit.
I think, well, I think if people get into, like, the spotlight or get, like, popularity, ego, all that stuff is super dangerous, you know? Yeah. And you don't realize it sometimes like you can be getting infected by it or that like, um, or suddenly you'll try to super manage how you're perceived, which some of that's normal because you want to protect yourself.
But, um, I think all of that's just, it's scary. Yeah.
I mean, like you just gotta, you gotta say, you gotta be yourself. Yeah.
That's what it what it is you just gotta be yourself but if yourself has been an asshole then maybe you should change yeah because they got people out there now that are not even gay that are being gay they have um all types of people like fake native americans like every week they're b busting one of these politicians for saying they were Honduran or something. Just a lot of bullshit.
I know. I wish I had the 23andMe to claim one of those things because I feel like if you can claim it, you can say it.
There's a lot of words I can't say that I would love to claim to be able to say. You know what I mean? Yeah, I'm trying to think if you seem like a...
Because what are you? You are... I am a mech.
Okay. So I'm Irish.
You're Irish. Like, pretty, pretty embretted.
Yeah. Okay.
Nope, no, no. Yeah, no judgment for me here.
I, um... Yeah, I think, yeah.
Irish shirts. Some people are really fucking Irish.
Have you seen that video of that baby? He's, like, breastfeeding and he orders another tit or whatever. Oh, my God.
No, I haven't seen that, but that's classic. It's the most Irish shit.
He like orders a round for everybody in the room or something. They're breastfeeding it like a family thing or whatever, like a birthday or whatever.
One of my worst jokes I ever wrote was like one of my first ones was that I'm so Irish that I was breastfed Guinness. Yeah.
Stupid. Yeah.
But it is what it is. Yeah.
It's a rough one kind of. I told some rough.
Oh, oh, my one of my first jokes was like, oh, I need a job, a blow job. That's classic though.
Come on. It was pretty bad.
Thanks. At least we have each other, right? It was pretty bad.
I was still off. So, yeah, I stopped by the comedy club the other night and you were doing stand-up how long so how long have you been doing stand-up just so because some of my audience won't know you so um you're a podcaster and a comedian yes okay and how long have you been doing stand-up i so i moved to new york in 2020 i was doing it like here and there on like the streets because you had to do it like outside at the time and i was because of covid yeah yeah and so i did like on and off here and there but started taking it serious around january of this last year okay of 2024 2024 yeah okay yeah and so what did that mean taking it serious like just getting up more like getting into like the circuits or what yeah it's like an oxymoron saying taking it serious because it's comedy but um just like going up as much as i could like networking i guess and putting myself out there kind of thing so i've been going up as much as i could and uh whitney cummings ended up taking me on the road with her oh whitney took you on the road with her my apologies whitney did yeah she did oh yeah that's awesome yeah so she put put the fire under my ass.
She came on. I used to have a podcast.
It's no longer. But she came on as a guest, and she was like, I fuck with you.
You should open for me. And I'm like, you don't want that.
And she was like, no, just do it. Just say yes, and it'll all follow.
So she put the fire under my ass, and I just grinded. Wow.
And so you were just—now, was it like you were overnight, suddenly on stage, having to do a lot of time, or no? So she gave me 15, which turned into 20, and she just kept—I guess I was doing something right, because she kept adding me to more cities. So I was like, all right, so I guess I'm doing pretty good.
Yeah. That was nice.
So you're from, originally you're from where at?

I'm from Boston, but like outside of Boston.

Okay.

Yeah.

And do people from outside of Boston look differently at people than inside of Boston?

Culturally, probably. There was this thing in the 70s called busing where they brought African-American children into the city.

For schooling and stuff? For schooling, yeah. So, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, schooling, yeah.
So some people didn't like that, so those people, they left. And that is, unfortunately, where I come from.
Oh, that's for your family. You were birthed out of those people.
Yeah, those were those guys. People make their choices, you know.
Yeah, because Boston's interesting. They got a lot of racism up there you know yeah but it's you know uh it's not as um loud as it is down here so it's yeah the south it's more the south has more that kind of slave magic history yeah yeah yeah we we just have uh just little innuendos of bad history and bad uh bad things we did i guess yeah it's still up, though, for sure.
It depends on what side you're on. You should just meet my dad.
Really? You'll see it there. Is he a fireman or no? No, he wanted to be a police officer.
Ended up being an electrician, but he fucked that up, too. What, doing electricity? Yeah, he got electrocuted.
Oh, he did? Yeah, on the job. Oh, yeah.
And he said he saw God. He started to be a believer.
And Tyler Childers walked him into heaven when he died. Tyler Childers? Yes, Childers.
Yes. The musician? The musician walked him into the pearly gates.
So that's my father. You almost got to believe him.
Yeah. Well, I mean, yeah.
But that guy's still alive. So I don't know what that illusion was with him.
That's true. I'm not really sure.
Yeah. Why would a guy who's not even dead come and help you? That's nice of him.
Yeah. It's really sweet.
But that makes me. I was like, oh, that's pretend.
Yeah. That's when it got a little fictional.
Yeah. Yeah.
Like you were having a bad dream. Then you woke up and you were blasted.
Yeah. Yeah.
Dude. Being electrocuted.
It's kind of under. It's not.
It's a uh it doesn't get as much credit as it deserves really i got got once by um electricity little fork in the outlet action uh no when i was at a fair or something uh i was we used to go to the carnival down the street from our home or whatever and they had they, they would let you ride the rides the day before the fair opened up. Oh, little test monkeys.
Yeah. Nice.
So we're out there and, um, and we're doing it or whatever. And they were just like plugging shit in and whatever and ever, you know, and I would try to get off one of the rides and I like grabbed two different railings and I think I connected some circuit or whatever.
So I was just like dish.. Oh, shit.
Did your friends see a skeleton like the cartoons? I don't know. My friends, they kind of ran off.
They're like, oh, something's – this isn't – we don't want to be involved. He's going to be a superhero.
Yeah, this guy's not doing good. We don't want to be involved in it.
And some guy called me, I think, a f***ed or whatever and kicked me in the back. And I was like, okay.
He saved my life, but he still called me a f**k. So I was like, well, you know, but that's what you get kind of around the carnival.
But that time, and then I was walking behind a food truck that was serving crab meat or whatever, which I don't trust. That sounds really wrong too.
Oh, it's, yeah, I don't trust crab meat that's that close to like a gas tank, I think, you know? Yeah, no, that's fair. I think crab meat should be fresh from the ocean.
Yeah. Like right from the ocean.
I actually, when we got here this weekend, I had crab legs. I'm like, what am I doing? I've shit my brains out this whole last couple days.
Oh, yeah, it's horrible. We're in land block right now, right? Yeah.
I don't know what I was doing. Never seen a crab anywhere around here.
I've never had money before, so I was like, yeah, we'll get some crab legs. This is sick.
You're as smooth as Tennessee

shellfish.

Yeah that's wild dude.

I feel fucking stupid.

That's that new money shit.

That's new money boy. That's fucking

new money dude.

Let's get the crab legs. This baby's getting a

grill and we're getting fucking

Tennessee crab legs. What else is wicked gay that I could get? I'm trying to think of shit that we got.
Yeah, what was your first new money buy? Oh, I got a fucking Cybertruck was the only thing I've ever really gotten for myself that was expensive. Somebody was telling me about that and they were saying that you thought that nobody would recognize you in that thing? Oh yeah, that's what I thought.
Are you ready? Yeah, I didn't think it was that big of a deal. I thought everybody would have them, you know? That's going to make people do many double takes.
Oh, it was horrible. Once at the car, second at you.
Yeah, it was horrible. Or sorry, once at you, second for the car.
No, it was all horrible. But whenever you first got them, I got home.
I ordered like five years ago, right? Like it was because it was a hundred bucks. Oh, that's like putting it on the wish list.
Okay. Right.
So for a hundred bucks, you could be like, I got a Cybertruck coming. It was online.
It's just on layaway. Yes.
That's rich people layaway. Yeah.
So it was like, yeah, I'm getting a Cybertruck or whatever. And then I kept like bothering Elon on Twitter Where are they you know give them

You know are you guys on a

Basis of like talking

Okay no I don't know I was just tweeting at

Him and stuff or like you know

Saying stuff like that

And then

Finally one day I got

Home I'd been on time for a few weeks and it was in my garage

Oh sick and so

I was like holy shit dude and

At first when you would drive down the street

People would like there were Thank you. home i'd been on time for a few weeks and it was in my garage oh sick and so i was like holy shit

dude and at first when you would drive down the street people would like there were people cheering people at american flags there were mexican there were mexican people out there doing this and dancing or whatever it was crazy you're like where did these so happy for you mexican people come from, you know?

Ole, ole, ole.

And you were just driving, but really they had like we are the champions it was like gay people people were coming out of the closet in front of you had girls flashing titties it was a lot yeah it was just a lot going on you know and um and yeah I did it I thought it automatically would have um extra darkness on the windows you know and it didn't so for a long time I thought it was would have extra darkness on the windows, you know? And it didn't. So for a long time, I thought it was like, yeah, obviously, it's, I can't, you know, I can just drive, you know, there was extra darkness.
And then, and then my buddy was like, you got to get those things tinted. I was like, oh, shit, man, they're not tinted.
And then, so finally I did get them tinted. Well, what was it, Run DMC or the, fuck.

I forget who it was, but they said tinted windows don't mean nothing.

They know who's inside.

Really?

Yeah.

So you're fucked.

And so is the guy who waited five years for a Cybertruck just to blow it up.

What a science experiment.

Oh, yeah, some guys did that, huh?

Yeah, bring that up, dude. Actually, you know what's funny? I thought about getting like a big fuse and putting it like hanging out of mine.
Oh, yeah. That's a goodie.
Oh, he did it for 4th of July? He did it for New Year's? That's what it does look like. It does look like a spectacle.
I think it was a political point in front of Trump. Oh, in front of Trump Tower.
Wow. I think one person did die

so it's tough to find a joke there.

It was probably some Middle Easterners

getting a picture next to it. People are always like,

can we get this? Can we?

And you're just like,

leave me alone. I'm gonna blow a lid.

Yeah, don't come ask me.

But the problem is the horn sounds a little bit

effeminate too. Does it?

Yeah, if you hit the horn, like a couple gay dudes dudes will kind of walk over. Like, oh, hi.
You need something? They still have prostitutes that work the streets. Do they? Yeah.
Not here. They don't have to anymore, right? Where's just some good, where are street walkers still in America? Can you pull that up, please? Because I've been looking.
I've told my friends before. i don't get laid much uh that's just a fact about me but um i told my friends just surprise me with a hooker one day and don't tell me it's a hooker a male hooker a male hooker they exist i'm not sure i think that they yeah definitely i mean there's like italian guys if that's what you're talking about um but i don't know what you're looking at overall.

Nevada has the largest commercial sex market in the United States when adjusted for population.

Okay.

Number of prostituted people.

Nevada has more than twice as many prostituted people per capita as California and 63% more than New York.

All right.

So they still have brothels there.

All right.

So I'm moving to Nevada.

Mind if you go to Nevada to get it?

There we go.

Yeah.

I wonder what would that be like for a woman?

Because I've gotten a lady of the night or whatever they're called.

A mystical.

Yeah.

Just one time.

I don't know what they call them.

Yeah.

A mystical plus.

Yeah.

I got one in Amsterdam, right?

Where people go get them.

Oh, yeah.

That's like the prize.

Yeah.

The red light.

Yeah.

The Mecca.

Of course. It is.
It's like the istanbul of like you know midnight cooter or whatever you know and so i went there and oh here was the funny part my buddy and i both of us like snuck like acted like we weren't gonna go there so we both like went off by ourselves You used to do separate rooms like, all right, man. Night, bud.
And then saw each other.

They were like.

That's tough. That's why you just have to embrace it and then just do a foursome or something.
But here was a sad part of it. You go in there and it seems like it's very alluring and the mirage of it is very compelling.
But you go in there and right when you go in their door, because they're standing out there and there's kind of some red lights inside of the room you go in there in the main door and there's like a bouncer guy right there and he's very you know tough guy and he says something real tough or something and then you kind of go like that and then you go into the room and it's very much like a doctor's room like everything everything's kind of like covered in like paper or plastic. It feels like.
Classy. It feels like, it feels very clinical.
Clinical. Okay.
So it's routine. It's like an appointment.
Right. That's what it starts to feel like.
So the magic of like any like, you know, romance or whatever. Were you looking for lust and love? I think everybody probably.
Probably. I thought you were looking for just like a wet willy.
No. I'm one of those guys who would leave the strip club and be like, man, I think there's a chance we're going to get her off the stage.
You're going to give him a pep talk the next time you go in? Like, hey, Annabelle magic. We could put you in community college, babe, you know? So much you could be so much more oh wow that sure is something so i think it's very hard like i can't get an erection like around broken glass or i can't get an erection i'm realizing around like some environments like that that are so clinical um have you ever spent a night in jail yeah so that's like exactly that how could you get right how could you get off that feels like jail? Yeah.
So that's like exactly that.

How could you get off?

That feels like jail.

With just a little silk.

It's kind of crazy.

It's a slightly silky jail.

Silky jail.

I would go to silky jail.

Smooth jail.

Do you have a mugshot?

I don't know if I'm a mugshot.

That's a great question. If I do, it's in Mississippi or Louisiana.

I'll have to check. That's a good thing to look up for.
That would be sick merch. Wow, is that me? Is that supposed to be you? Damn.
I'm sorry if you would say something like that. Neither one of those are me, dude.
And then this one's just literally your headshot, not a mugshot. Wow, yeah, that's just a headshot.
Go back up to that second one. Oh, you're a tiny baby boy in that blue shirt one.
Very young, very impressionable. There I am.
What did I do? Oh, it was kitty porn. Oh, no, kitty vids.
Yeah. K-I-T-T-Y.
Oh, so it's meow yeah all right no problem what about you you been in no i'm dying to though because i i would like i would like uh a mugshot see you in there i would yeah it would be good i think i'd run that thing like a mcdonald's i'd see you in there keeping stuff in your bra yeah and like And like, they come to me and they got to ask like,

Oh,

do you want red dye?

Number two.

Yeah. You want some lipstick?

Cause that's what the girls do in there.

They go crazy.

Yeah.

You want to watch McCullough?

No.

You want me to thread your eyebrows with some,

with some,

I don't know what they'd use,

but I'll find out.

Yeah.

And I'll be the head of the market.

Yeah.

You want me to pull some Claire all out of your pussy pussy or what Like people smuggling makeup In there or something Is Clairol still makeup I don't know what that is I'm not sure I could pretend Clairol I thought it was a makeup company is it Alright sure Fuck it What does love look like For you what's your love life like do you have a boyfriend or you don't have a boyfriend I do not have a boyfriend you might have said that too sorry I've never had one and I'm 26 I know and it's like everyone always does that and it's like oh rats like damn every single time I'm like oh I should just let that person have that reaction because it is crazy. It is crazy, but I have to address it.
But it's also pretty special, though, I think. Yeah.
When I find that Mr. Special Guy, it's going to be real good because I've waited this long, I suppose.
Yeah. So, yeah, 26 years.
You haven't missed them. Do you feel like you've missed out on some good ones or no? No, no, they don't really flock You'd be totally shocked that I'm not I don't really scream Fuck me, like I don't really have fuck me eyes ever So I think I'm more of like a A bro to some people Like my way of flirting is like misogynistic Oh, like kind of, yeah, just being buddies? Yeah, just being like, yo, dude, like, check out her tits, or you can check out mine if you prefer.
Yeah. Kind of thing.
Yeah. Oh, I see what you're saying.
Yeah. So, haven't had luck thus far.
Hence the male hooker. Did you have, like, a high school prom date? He is now, I had to ask him, he was a year older, and he is now she, and we him he was a year older and he is now she and we don't i have i've is he straight still or in a woman or is he now a gay woman i'm having a hard time picking up the pieces because we don't talk you know those people you just have to be like fix the clues in and see what they're yeah we're all about like the little the little clues that they put out there um and then i didn't go to my senior prom.
You didn't? No. I was one of those.
I'm still waiting to get picked up from my senior prom in my head. Oh yeah.
Foolishly. You know.
One day. Oh.
But. Yeah dude.
Yeah that's definitely. I got stuck after the prom.
This dude was crying and he had borrowed his dad had left him a long time ago and he borrowed his mom's business blazer and had those uh shoulder pads in it oh classy yeah it was classy but it was also just like a sign of the times you know yeah like young men being raised by single moms and having to wear their mom's business blazer to the prom yeah i guess i could have had it worse and it kind of it was like but he was bawling about something he thought he looked like damon wayans or something but some bullshit or whatever i don't know he was out of his fucking mind and i was trying to get laid but also be nice so i was waiting to go see my girlfriend but it was just a nightmare but this was your buddy yeah i know i got stuck giving him a ride after prom oh fuck to this party and he started just bawling damn it's not that bad take the take it-shirt. Yeah.
Underneath. But he's like, everybody says I look like Damon Wayans and I want to have my own life.
And I was like, motherfucker, you don't look anything like Damon Wayans. Is he black? Oh, no.
He was kind of like tan or whatever. Like, bitch, you don't look anything like fucking Damon Wayans, dude.
You're closeted homosexual. Just fucking come out of the closet so we can go to this party.
You wanted to wear that. You bought it specially.
Oh, he loved it. Was he balding? What was the problem? He did have a skinned head and he had and he seemed kind of black sometimes just for fun.
But he was a great guy. Dang, that's I guess that's interesting.
sorry to act like that about that no no that's actually I think it's hilarious but now does it become a thing where you don't have a boyfriend because it's almost become a thing does that ever happen yeah like I'm like too far in now so it's like I don't really I'm not looking I don't really give a shit at this point it's just it is what it is if it comes it comes but I would love to come one day and are you saving yourself for marriage type thing are you still sexually active well i would be if i could be if i had it coming towards me like that oh my god i'd be a whore but uh i'm basically accidentally celibate which is a beautiful thing really you know some women they say oh it's so easy for a woman to get laid. They can have whoever they want.
That's not true. There are some of us that are from a really hard time.
Really? I know a lot. I feel like I could name at least five or six guys that would definitely make love to you.
That I know firsthand. Oh, wow.
And have seen in the past two weeks. You know? Wow.
And you've got some cool pals. I mean, are just, you know, like, I mean, because, yeah, I don yeah i don't even yeah but it's like what am i even talking about is that a crazy thing to say no no it's great to hear actually that just gave me a little bit of a boost dude yeah are you kidding me man i know some people that would definitely probably knock you up even hell yeah i know some people that would just be amazing i was thinking about it the other night i'm like, you know what? I'm so anti having a kid, but I guess if I had one, I would have to have it because that would be my only shot.
You know? Only shot at what? Having a child. Oh no.
Because if this one guy wants to bust it in, then I guess I got to put one out. Oh no.
It's like, it seems like a sad thing to people, but this is just my life grace it's definitely you know i think there's a lot of semen heading your way in 2025 i can't wait to guzzle it down my man it's gonna be good but like it's it's funny to not be a whore but like really want to be yeah there's something special about that because most whores they don't want to be they want they want to be known for something other than their hole or their box. Right.
But then they're just out there slurping or whatever to feel decent. Yeah.
But at least you don't have to do that, huh? Yeah, I guess. I guess.
But, you know. Sorry.
Mouse wide open. I'll wait for my special day.
I don't want to talk about this, man. I don't either.
This is why I don't have a daughter, dude. This is why I don't have a fucking daughter, dude.
What do you do if your daughter is like a tramp and you're the dad? That's when you got to start. Do you have a talk with him, you think? Have any of your friends ever, they're like, damn, my dad had a talk with me because he knew I was like getting smashed so much or doing a lot of sex or whatever? I think when you start having the talk is when they develop more of a daddy problem.

It's like there's nothing you can do as a father, I feel like.

It's just like their decision to be what they want to do, I suppose.

I don't know.

I've never been a whore yet.

So we'll see.

If you had a daughter, what would her name be?

Probably something from that Scarlet Letter book. What are some names in that book? Something from the days when people used to die on long ship journeys type shit.
Hester, that's beautiful. Hester, maybe a Pearl.
Pearl. Roger Chillingworth, that would be one.
Maybe I'll name her that. I only have a boy name if I were to have a boy.
Yeah, what do you have? I got Danger, but we call him Danny. Danger? Danger.
And everybody in Boston is named Danny anyway. No matter what their name is, it becomes Danny.
Yeah, it doesn't matter. Yeah.
Yeah. It could literally be Roger and turn into Danny.
Yeah. My name is Roger, but they call me Danny.

Yeah.

But this kid, when he's filling out medical forms, he has to write Danger.

But everybody knows him as Dan or Danny.

Oh, yeah.

I think it's good.

That's a cool name.

Yeah.

Danger.

Not bad.

And he could get a cool job.

He could be, I'm trying to think of what he could be, anything.

He could be the caution sign when you mop the floor.

Yeah. He could be the caution sign when you mop the floor.
Yeah.

He could be a traffic guard.

I feel like I'm blowing this.

Am I blowing this?

This conversation?

Yeah.

No, I feel like it too.

Okay.

Do you feel like I am?

No, I feel like I'm blowing this.

You're doing great.

I don't even think maybe I'm asking about the best stuff.

I think I'm too honest sometimes where I just have to be like,

I feel like I'm fucking this up.

No, I think it's interesting because I never really,

I don't think,

I'm not good at,

I don't talk to women

that much about sex stuff.

Yeah, I never talk about sex.

Really?

I'm just trying my very best.

Yeah, thanks for trying.

Yeah.

I have no personal experience.

Dude, well, hold on.

I'm like,

I'm like writing a book report

on a book I've never read.

We're going to get somebody

to come in here and just, look, I'll do it like this, and you guys just figure it out. Oh, shit.
God, dude, that's crazy. You know, when I was growing up, I had a job cleaning out wishing wells over there in my parish.
And there weren't many of them. Yeah, I agree, you know, but I wasn't much of a worker as well.
But I will say this, that wishing wells, they bring in big loot. You know, the Trevi Fountain in Rome collects over 1.5 million a year.
Yep. What I'm saying is spare change really adds up.
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I don't even know what to ask about. Hey, how was your holiday? Yeah, it's good.
It was okay. I got a fever or something, you know? And so I was like, everything was miserable kind of.
Yeah, I feel that. I had an ear blowout.
I can't hear out of this one. Really? Yeah.
Like at all. Were you guys out on the water? I was on an airplane and like three weeks ago it just blew.
And this is just a nightmare. I've never had it.
I can't hear. Yeah.
It's pretty brutal. But other than that, pretty classic of a holiday.
Good stuff. You spend time with your family? I did, yeah.
Nice. Are your parents still married? They shouldn't be.
They can't afford the divorce. They looked into it.
And so I'm just working really hard this year so they can get there. Dude, that's such a great thing if at the end of the year you actually have a big divorce for them.
I think they'll be stoked. Oh, yeah.
It'll be really good. And they still live outside of Boston? Yeah, yeah.
Oh, that's beautiful. Yeah.
And so you have, so just so my listeners know, so you, I know you, because we had Brianna Chicken Fry and you guys had a podcast together. Yes, yeah.
And it's called? Plan Brie Uncut. Plan Brie Uncut.
Yes. And you guys don't have it anymore.
It's no longer. It's no longer.
Yes. And so you guys, and you guys had been friends for a long time yeah we were friends forever okay um since we were like in fifth grade oh wow kid friends yeah oh that's cute since we were little baby children that's sweet that's sweet and um and have you guys kept a good friendship after i know that i know that there's been like i'm not trying to get into like the tumultuousness of things or whatever but how is how does that stand today because it must be tough to like have a business with a friend yeah um i was just i've always just um like in 2020 she got the job at barstool and like had to move to new york for it and i was taking a semester off from college and she was like do you want to come with me and i was like yeah fuck it why not and so like i door dashed on foot when we got there and stuff and like she slowly but surely like was trying to get me a job at barstool oh really so really hustling for you yeah so like she like really like like stuck her neck out for me and like we ended up doing the podcast together after like a year of living there and it was just so much fun we had a blast it was always fun doing it yeah a lot of y'all's clips are so great dude we would just shoot the shit good banter but um you know uh we're just i think we're just going through a rough patch right now and uh we'll i think one day we're gonna figure it out yeah but uh she's doing her thing i'm doing my thing and uh i still love her so i'm being a politician right now you feel? trying my best you know what's interesting is I've had times where I was like I was going through moments with friends and stuff you know and most of them evened out over time but the toughest part about it like was in the times where we weren't getting along or we were having differences that I didn't have my friend at times that was really the shittiest part yeah it was like even though i would have like a leg to stand on about why i was upset about stuff sometimes i'd be like i'd be like man fuck scott dude i gotta call scott right now and yeah right i couldn't even call my friend i'm so fucking fired up i wouldn't then you get done with the conversation like ah dude you know who would really help me out with this? Exactly who I'm talking about.
It's fucking brutal. It's tough.
That was kind of the worst part sometimes was just hitting that type of moment where like, oh man, because it's hard to kind of have good friends, you know? Yeah. Do you still have pals from growing up? Oh yeah.
I got some good pals from growing up. So, and then I've made more over the years, kind of like people go through things.
A lot of friends get married married and stuff and since i'm not married you kind of fall into this weird place where you just become like you're just friends with whoever's not married yeah that's kind of fucked up yeah when does that start happening i would say probably in your 30s it starts getting we're like well i guess it depends on where you're from like where i'm from louisiana people get married early yeah yeah and so you a couple guys right out of the gate. And right after they get married, their hair falls out immediately.
I don't know why. Well, at least they locked it in beforehand.
That's true. Yeah.
And maybe some of those guys know their hair is about to fall out. Yeah.
They have an idea. They're like, oh, I'm going to lock it in.
I'm going to get that. I'm going to hop on top of that.
Their bald dad is just having a conversation with them. Hey, buddy, it's time to get that ring and put the knee down.

You're like, Dad, I'm only 15.

They always had that one kid that went bald way early, you know?

And people would use him to buy alcohol.

They're like, what do you mean he can't buy liquor? And be like, he's bald.

Damn it.

He just sucked out his 401k.

He's fine.

That's Roger.

He rode here on his bicycle. You think a fucking child is bald, damn it? You're the D-U-A-R-A-R-A-R-A-R-A-R-A-R-A-R I was growing up I think yeah and then I met you know it's been uh like I think like since I work in business kind of travel around and stuff, you meet a lot more people probably than you do if you just stay in one, live in one town.
Yeah. I do think everyone should get out of their town at some point.
Oh, yeah. Because, like, you don't know what you're missing if you don't.
Yeah. Like, I thought everybody was Catholic growing up.
I never knew any Jewish people. I never knew anyone who was different.
And I didn't find out until my junior year of high school that there's other religions That's pretty retarded So Catholic is the one With the priests The one where they're playing freeze tag with the kids But they didn't tell the kids And that's where I thought I could get some But they only like the boys I've been trying every angle for years Did you do anything you put eye black on or anything? I guess I could have shaved my head But they see right through that with the tits Yeah Oh it must be horrible when a priest sees tits He's like Good day son You shall not be blessed I don't know what they say What are we talking about? Fuck Yeah I never been I'm trying to think if I ever been Catholic or not. I might have been.
We were Presbyterian for a while, I know. And then my mom got in a fight with somebody outside of the church once.
And so then I think we were Methodists or Sixth Methodists or something. I don't know how many there are.
I got to ask my mom. Is that like Mormon shit? No, it's just like you don't drive far to the church wherever that one is like the closest church or whatever the lemonade stand church it was very yeah it was like okay this is it you know it was like that kind of but okay so now so you ended up in New York was that your first time you lived in New York when you went there with Brianna? Yes yeah so I've been there for like four years do you feel like you're fitting in there now? well now with stand up I'm like oh finally I love New York like I needed like my thing and I finally found my thing and so I've been loving that and I was just too scared to do it I was just being such a pussy To get up on stage? To get up on stage, yeah And like even give it a whirl Like open mics and shit I just wouldn't But uh Yeah, because you're so endearing I mean one of the things That I always admire about you Is just you being you Is it's like immensely charming To like a Like it it's like you can't help, but not like want to follow along with your world.
It feels like, yeah, that's just really sweet. Thank you.
Yeah. It's a, it's, it's, it's great.
I, I've, I try to be like, um, like just myself and like open and honest, but my problem is I do this accent and it comes out only sometimes. Yeah.
So I've got like this Boston accent, but it's sometimes it's on, sometimes it's off. So people are like, you're doing a fake accent, but I don't even know I'm doing it.
Right. So I don't know who I am.
Oh yeah. It's kind of crazy.
If you don't know who you are, then you're a comedian. Then most comedians don't know who they are because that's why they're putting on a show some of the show is over time they're trying to figure out who they are they're trying to manage this presentation that they put to the world I think because when they were young maybe whoever they were didn't feel comfortable or whatever in the world so they started making this them anyway that's a little bit meta I think what was the did you ever like there was ever a point in your life where you were like oh my god i want to be a performer let me think about it um i liked i liked when people laughed i didn't i didn't know i didn't i think i didn, I never really trusted people that much, but I knew if they were laughing that they couldn't not like me.
Yeah. Like, I feel like it would be impossible to hate somebody and laugh at the same time, kind of.
Yeah, because you can't fake a laugh. Right, you can, but you, but if you're telling, but I would know.
Yeah, I know a genuine laugh and I know a fake laugh. Yeah.
And if you're just going to fucking hate me and be a dick, then you're not going to laugh in general, and then I could wean you out. Yeah.
Yeah, it's good. Yeah, so I think there was something like that for me probably.
Do you think you kind of had that comedian thing, like that you wanted to be a comedian, or do you think that you just wanted to be a performer? Did you kind of know what it was, like where you wanted to be a comedian or do you think that you just wanted to be a performer did you kind of know what it was like where you wanted to end up and do you still know i've i've always wanted to do stand-up i just didn't think i could i didn't think it was an option and i there's a part of me that like wishes that and this is i guess serious but there's a part of me that wishes i was able to get into stand-up before anything else because I just want to be – I don't want people to think I'm just, like, doing it for shits and gigs to have, like, this other thing. It's, like, that's what my main focus is and that's what, like, I love.
It just so happened that one came before the other kind of thing. And, like, I wish I, like – I don't know, got more of the reps in before people started coming.
Yeah. Right, and coming to see you.
Which I appreciate people coming and seeing you. Of course.
But, like, I really wanted to get it right. Yeah.
Like, I didn't even want you to stay the other night. I was like, yeah.
Oh, for the set? Like, one day you can see it. Not yet.
It's not there yet. But, you know, it's good enough to buy tickets, but it's not there yet for you.
No, no shot.

Oh, it was just cool to see you and your friends in the green room. That was dope, dude.
And just like to see like just I wanted to like kind of see what your energy was about going up on stage. And the room was buzzing, man.
People were so excited. Yeah.
I think especially with podcasts and stuff, I noticed this. I've sat in the audience and watched some of my friends who are podcasters As well Yeah And um You just want to kind of listen And be there In the room with them You're like I just That's my person Or that's my friend Whatever it is I fuck with them I just want to be in the room While they're doing whatever Yeah yeah You know And I've done the Um The podcast touring That shit is So easy Oh you mean being on stage With Just as your podcast Yeah oh I've never done that it's so easy you just like you have segments you do the same thing every night you can switch around with jokes depending on the crowd but compared to stand up like it's a walk at the park it feels like stealing you're stealing money from fans that adore you it's like it's not fair What? But I never made any money off of it.
Really? Barstool took it all, yeah. Off your tour? Yeah.
No way. We had, we had some, we had, I had an interesting contract.
Yeah. But I loved them so much.
Are you still working with Barstool? I actually just recently left. Okay.
So when you leave, so if you leave, that means do you still have your rights to, I didn't make anything when I was there. Half your podcast, but you had a contract, you got paid something annually.
Um, yeah. So I got, I had a salary and that was, that was kind of it.
And so I had the option to leave and I took it. Was it a good salary? It was decent.
Um, it wasn't, uh, equated to... Was it like $500,000? No, nothing close to that, no.
My buddy was making a little bit more, a lot of bit more, a whole shit ton more. Okay.
So there was discrepancy in power? But she was doing another podcast and whatnot. Oh, that's right.
She was bringing a baby different fans from that also. Yeah, yeah.
Got it. So it's all relative.
Yeah, and also some of that stuff is, as much as it, like, it's like it's live and learn sometimes. I also didn't care.
I was just happy to be there. Right.
Like, I was, like, literally, I was stoked to just have the job. Yeah.
So I was, at one point I was working for free selling t-shirts just paying for my own clothes. Yeah, it was crazy like yo I'm just like really happy to be here do it any way I can yeah it's about to grind oh yeah and I you know what I think no matter what and no matter what you get involved in you have to go through that you have to go through periods of that yeah and even with stand-up you can't escape that it's like you just have to you know get it on stage we all you know it's like we all learn it i still learn it every time i take some weeks off and go back on stage it's like god this feels new and scary yeah and my balls just hide inside of me it's i did that's the new thing i'm learning is because i haven't taken time off this whole year and with christmas i took like two weeks off and i'm i fucked myself big time i was like jesus christ this is bad it, bitch.
Those shows, I don't know, they were fine but they weren't great, I'll tell you that. It was tough.
What, um, do you have like a closer, like do you have it set up? Are you telling stories? Are you telling more jokes? Like what's your set like right now? I'm kind of all over the place. I'm trying to find my, I'm trying to find my thing.
I'm doing half jokes, half punches. The punches are corny.
Oh, some of the punches

to the jokes are corny? Yeah, I don't know if you can tell

but I hate my entire set at the

moment.

I really think it could be a lot better.

But that's why I'm doing dry January

when I hit the ground running.

Oh, for sure.

Do you feel like a comedian or do you feel like somebody that's

pretending to be a comedian? I feel like I'm pretending. Of course.
You can tell. Try some nuance.
Now, do you feel like a comedian? Do you feel like somebody that's pretending to be a comedian?

I feel like I'm pretending. Of course.
You can tell. It's brutal.
I'm like, I really want to be taken serious, but I can't even take myself serious. I'm a fucking fool.
I'm just foolish. At least.
And you know what, dude? I'll pay to come watch you be dishonest. I will pay $42

plus fees and you know what dude I'll pay to come watch you be this honest I will pay

$42

plus fees

okay

to come to a room

and watch somebody be this honest

sweating

sweating through my pants

it's really not as bad as I'm making it out to be

but

no but I think look

there's something about honesty

there's not as much of it in the world

I would literally pay to go to a room

Thank you. I look up to, like, all your buddies.
Oh, we just been doing it longer. We don't know the fuck we're doing.
But you've got it. And it's just, it's, like, so awesome to see.
I just, I can't wait for the day I finally get it, you know? Yeah. When did it click? I don't know.
I mean, I think in, like, about 11 years, you start to be, like, I don't know. There's some different moments.
I mean, thank you. That's sweet of you to say that.
Oh, yeah. I mean I definitely feel like i don't know there's some different moments i mean thank you that's sweet of you to say that yeah i mean i definitely feel like i don't have a like this is like it is my job now you know yeah for a long time i didn't know if it was my job you know i felt like it was but you keep going home like at christmas and you don't have a real job and you're like i'm a comedian like whatever dude you know where's your husband you know because everybody just thinks, of course.
Until you get on some sort of television or platform. Like, oh, he's actually very successful.
Yeah. We should have been rooting him on.
Good for him. Yeah, maybe we'll scratch out these f***ing posters that we drew.
Actually, will you sign this? I'm actually a huge fan. And like, it's a poster that says, you're a f***er.
You held up at my show. But yeah, I'll sign it'll sign it thanks guy um so yeah I think there's like so that kind of stuff gets tricky and then I think there comes a point where it's like you don't have anything else and so it's like whenever you give up anything else like there were times I quit to do real estate there was times I quit and I fucked up like the third contract I ever did and I had to pay somebody's lease for like six months how'd you fuck up that bad? I fucking put myself

as the guarantor

are you kidding me? that's crazy

that just

takes one John Hancock to pay six months

rent I had to go live with my

girlfriend and I'm paying

rent for these other motherfuckers

I can't do this as the worst part

I was going through

some weird shit sometimes and I would pee in the sink

at night at my girlfriend's cause I didn't want to pee loud

I don't do this. This is the worst part.
I was going through some weird shit sometimes and I would pee in the sink at night at my girlfriend's because I didn't want to pee loud and wake up the family, right? Oh, with the family. Yeah, with the family.
And the cat would go in there and like mill around in the sink and fucking snitch me out. The mom ended up knowing that I was urinating in the sink.
What's that talk sound talk sound like? She said it. Your boyfriend been peeing in the sink.
It's not the first boyfriend that's ever peed in the sink for her. She's kind of into it.
The mom's into it for some reason. I remember her daughter texting me, mom knows.
That's what she said. But the pissing in the sink? Who knows? Whatever, Grace.
Whatever. We're all going through it.
I suppose. Goddamn.
You got, you got i mean you're gonna figure it out and i think it's interesting these days i think because i'll say this there used to be more of stairways for how people got into comedy right yeah there was like um obviously you got on stage but then you got on different like little like there was like a comedy central 10 minutes or there was like um like these uh now there's like dry bar and different groups like that but there was other small groups where you did comedy sets that they put out there right um and now a lot of that's disappearing there was like uh what was that late show there were some late shows um where you would just sit around in a panel right where people would start to build their name yeah and now i think just a lot of like podcasting has kind of become that it's taken the place of a lot of things that's true yeah whereas before there was like maybe more acting roles or things like that for for comedy that um because there's not even that many comedies now like shows not really no not so much i think that's i think that's the new wave that they're trying to do right now is that they're trying to um cast for a lot of comedy shows because there has been like a lull yeah that's what i heard so i think that you have to have some place where you start to build you know that's like an entertainment outlet so i think podcasting is that you know i think it's just kind of become that and uh or tiktok or some some sort of like just uh you know people's own social media you know because sure you have the podcast but then also the the clips are kind of what bring people into your world a lot of times yeah that's true that is really true i don't feel like i'm preaching at you do i no no i'm listening and i'm taking it all in because I – I wouldn't take any of this. Clearly, I need it.
I need all the information that I need. I know it's been a while since you had a man in you, but this ain't – But don't take any of my ideas.
No, no. Don't take any of my – I'm not trying to give you any advice.
No, no, no. That was the advice you gave.
Don't take anyone's advice. Was it? The other night.
Oh, good. You said, oh, well, I just fucked that up.
Because that's even Cause that's even advice huh Damn what an idiot I guess I haven't podcasted in a while I'm pretty rusty You seem great I'm usually good with the banter No you're always great I'm usually good with the jokes I feel like you're doing good Your sister's here Yeah shout out Nora What's up Nora Nora's here We're trying to figure out So Nora just graduated from West Virginia University're trying to figure out what we're going to do with her. She needs a job.
So I'm trying to think of what she can do within the realm of working together. Do you have some skill sets, Nora? I don't know.
I can edit. You can edit.
Yeah. So we're thinking she's going to be doing like the social media side of things.
Great. Yeah.
That'd be nice. She's good to have it's good to have um someone that knows you very well yeah so yeah and just find new things that are creative that's just like one of my goals i start thinking of for this year it's like well what things could i do that would be create like like would seem like unique or that could try and be more creative what do you what do you got so far well you have the that movie is coming out yeah me and david spade are making a movie you're making a movie it's in the process of being made right now we wrote it and we start making it in January what's the writing process for that like are you allowed to talk about it yeah it took us like two years and we tried to get financing nobody wanted to help and so we're making it ourselves oh it's like, yeah, I think I thought like I never wanted to be an actor or anything like that.
And I don't really think that that is a world of mine. But I thought like if I look back and I was like, I get a chance to make, I got to do something with David Spade.
Yeah. Who I like idolized.
And do you Skype and write? We would write together. Together? Yeah, I still have my apartment in LA.
Oh, gotcha. So So whenever I'm there We've worked on it over the years in tons of ways But it's been fun, I can't even believe it I definitely have learned a lot And we think that it's funny But if I look I'm laying in my deathbed or whatever I think it would be neat to be able to say That I got to do that And Absolutely.
And also that I tried to do it. You know, because people may make it seem like you can't do this.
You have to have all these special people. Like I haven't had an agent help me.
Nobody's. And so that to me is like the kind of shit that I like.
Oh yeah. You don't think I can do this? Watch me.
Yeah. Fuck you.
You know, I'll prove you wrong. Yeah.
There's nothing. The only thing difference between you and me is that you've done it already.
That's the only thing. That's fair.
I don't know. That shit makes me fucking activated for some reason.
Sorry. You're locked in.
I love to see that. I don't know why.
Well, you're excited. You jazz.
I don't even know if I'm excited. I think I'm just fucking angry.
I'm going to hide somebody's kneecaps in their ass, dude. Dude, you and Spade just Spaded people? I mean, it'd be.
Fucking people up? Look, if anything, I get to sit around with him for five weeks and and laugh and we have a good time so it'd be cool um when do you know something like that's done i don't know that's the toughest thing is scariest is that like you know once you move on you can't there's no yeah like that scene or whatever is locked in yeah you know so and i'm not a great actor you know it's like it's like I'm gonna do my best I have a plan and I'm excited about what we wrote you also worry that if you wrote it now and it comes out in seven months will any of the jokes still be funny I'm sure that sort of thing you guys have timeless humor he does I don't know what the fuck I'm doing, dude. But he's definitely.
So I don't know. It's just a lot of little things you learn.
Like, oh, this is maybe why I don't. This isn't something that I love.
What did your mom get you for Christmas? My mom got me a megaphone for Christmas. And I got her a trip to Hawaii.
So,

a little different. And her dad, your dad too, to go to Hawaii? That's what's

kind of fucked up, I'm realizing.

But my father and I, we have

a tricky relationship.

Really? Yeah. And do y'all have any brothers?

Does he have any sons? No. Even the dog's

a lady. So, yeah, the poor

bastard. Everybody always says, but

it's what he gets, he says. I guess he was a fucking asshole growing up, so.
Was he to who? To women? It must be, yeah. He must have been a fucking prick because he says, I deserve it.
That's what I get. Four women and a lady dog.
Yeah. Yeah.
And what happened again? He was in a fire? What happened? He was in, he was electrocuted on the job. So So he's the guy when the lights go off in the city, he turns them on and he got zippity zapped and now we're, now we're doing the same drugs.
He takes, he takes, he does ketamine therapy. Does he really? Yeah.
And I, he does his in a doctor's office and I do mine under the Brooklyn Bridge. It's a little different.

Dude, my buddy Ernest used to do it in a car wash all the time. He'd call me.
I'd be like, how are you doing? He's like, ketamine in the car wash. Screening.
Wow. And is your dad kind of a romantic guy still? Do they still have a romantic relationship with your parents? Um, no.
I'm just trying to envision him. Just absolutely no.
Picture like any Irish guy with like a scally cap about like yay high, wide, one dead tooth. Oh yeah.
The old Andrea Gale, huh? Yes. Chewing tobacco but he doesn't care anymore.
It's just all in his teeth. Yeah, yeah.
It's just all like a fucking salad bar like his face confetti oh yeah tobacco it's like every day's a party in his mouth yeah like that guy just fucking whistling tunes just just whistling the soundtrack of The Departed all the time.

Just rehearsing for lines he doesn't even have.

He just always wanted to be a mobster.

Who was on your Boston Mount Rushmore?

We've got Ben Affleck.

Oh, yeah.

Matt Damon.

And then it used to be Marky Mark, but he kind of lost me because he wakes up too early in the morning and gets too swollen too early. Yeah, it got bizarre, but he was also selling liquor too.
That was a strange – I was like, it's selling a liquor, but you're also up so early. His hands are in too many baskets.
I don't trust him. He he has his hands in too many things does he seem like you think he still has the pulse of the streets in Boston or no nah I think he lost that he went full Hollywood he might have he lost us he moved to Vegas now I think I think he lives in Las Vegas nice guy busy man busy He's busy.
Done a lot. He has.

And it starts early on.

Beating the shit out of an Asian guy, all that jazz.

He did that?

He did that.

Oh, I didn't know all that.

Oh, you can't get caught.

He's not stopping Asian hate at all.

Yeah, and that's a shit.

Yeah, the brothers picked it up a couple years ago. Remember when the brothers were zapping Asians everywhere?

Were they? Yeah, a couple years ago. The brothers picked it up a couple of years ago.
Remember when the brothers was zapping Asians everywhere? Were they?

Yeah.

A couple of years ago.

Your brothers are the brother brothers.

The brothers was zapping Asians everywhere.

And the news kept being like, Asian people are under attack.

They're like, yeah, my brothers.

It was the brothers and my father.

My dad just is sparky now.

Yeah.

Your dad's like that guy who just walks across the floor

like this

and he's like,

ugh.

Remember doing that shit to people?

Oh, yeah.

I get people good.

I used to,

my favorite thing to do

to fuck with someone

was pass the milk carton around

and say,

oh, you sit on it.

It's all right.

And then you give it

to the biggest person

and you know it's going to explode.

They sit on the milk carton

and it opens?

Yeah.

People did that to me.

Really? Yeah. It wasn't me

who was doing that to people. Would it open

under you or not? Always every time.

And I fell for it every time. It was foolish.

I got jumped a lot growing up. You did?

I did, yeah. By who?

One time from a black man. Oh, yeah.

That was good. That was at a 21 Savage

concert. That's the old, yeah.

Yeah. That's the Irish

hello right there. Yeah.

Was it a 21 Savage concert? Yeah.

He was kind of windmilling me and I was

Thank you. Savage concert.
That's the old, yeah. Yeah.
That's the Irish hello right there. Was it a 21 Savage concert? Yeah.
I could see that. He was kind of windmilling me, and I was pissing my pants, crying.
And then all of a sudden, 21 Savage said, yo, y'all wilding down there. Y'all got to chill.
And I'm like, can you help? It was crazy. Were you wilding or you were not? I was getting wilded on.
Okay, you're getting wilded on. Yeah.
Oh. Yeah.
Sorry that happened. No, it was brutal.
And it was good, though, because my buddy didn't even try to help. Dang on.
The girlfriend of the guy who was punching me said, nah, just let it happen. And she did.
She let it happen. No way.
So there wasn't even any female support? No, it was just, yeah. Oh, baby girl, that's tough.
Yeah, no, it's quite the story, though. I went to school the next day with a black eye From a black eye So that was nice Then they say that's cultural appropriation You're like give me a fucking break dude I just pretend it was from sex I just keep bringing it back to that Well I'm sorry that some You got abused by a brother like that That's all good You could have gotten knocked up though That would have been nice Have you dated a lot of black men over the years? No dating You haven't dated either? No I've been on three dates in my life Are you serious guys?? Yeah.
Like the last date I went on, he recorded inside my house. So I said, I think I'm good for now.
Oh, for now. Yeah.
Two weeks later, you're like, let's run it back. Like, yeah, dude, just lock your camera up, I guess.
Yeah. So that was brutal.
I got to think of somebody good to set. Well, now that's sad.
I shouldn't have said that. No, it's all right.
Another date I went on, I was talking about it on the podcast, keeping it very ambiguous. I didn't want any feelings to get hurt, but he showed up hammered, and I thought that he was just wicked drunken slurring his words.
Well, it turns out he had a speech impediment, and I didn't realize, and I didn't pick up on that, and he sent me a very long text. I have a speech impediment, and I don't know why.
Very long. Yeah.
And he said, I didn't know why you didn't like the champagne I bought you at the dive bar. I said, I'm sorry.
I guess we just want different things. Ugh.
Yeah. I don't know.
I don't have a good track record. Well, yeah, I think you do.
I think it's just, you know, I think, I have no idea. Yes, Papa? I know.
I'm not gonna fucking tell you, dude. It's quite alright.
No, we're gonna get some fucking real dogs in here to smash you, Gracie. Hell yeah.
Is that better? Have you seen that girl? Have you seen that girl who got railed by like 150 guys? Oh yeah, I saw that. I don't know how I feel about that.
I don't know what to's just is a it's just a thing that happens but she's almost like the evil kenevil of like pussy yeah she's kind of doing like magic like i don't know she's like adding time she's doing daylight savings or something yes that's a lot of time spent yeah it just seems crazy and then what are you really doing it's almost just like like if people are just running and just kind of jousting themselves into your vagina real quick. And then we're running off.
It's like a meet and greet with their dick out. Yeah.
Yeah, just like next. Yeah, Lily Phillips is her name.
She's gorgeous. British OnlyFans.
British girl, yeah. Well, I wonder if this is the thing you're starting to see because of OnlyFans.
Like people are having to start to one-up each other. Yeah, well, this is going the extra goddamn mile.

Yeah.

I don't know if I would even enjoy something like that.

I mean, even if you were doing it, you know, you were like, I'm going to make love to 100 women.

I'd be like, I'd like 11 women.

I would definitely want to chill, have a Gatorade or something, get on my phone.

Yeah.

It's like, yeah.

Like, what's the – I don't know why I was going to ask that, have a Gatorade or something, get on my phone. Yeah, it was like, yeah.
Like, what's, uh...

I don't know why I was going to ask that.

Listen to some Scott Stapp or whatever.

Did you see that Scott Stapp,

that their band has made more this year

than they ever made before?

Who did?

I thought that was pretty interesting.

Bring that up, brother.

There goes my hero.

You know that song?

Watch how he goes.

Yeah, is that it? Where goes my hero? Yeah?

Is that it?

Yeah.

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Today's episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. You know, it's a new year here in the world.
And that means that you might have the same problems. That's what I'm noticing for myself.
I've got some of the same things, and I'm not getting into self-pity, but I'm just noticing, hey, some of this stuff, I keep carrying it. I keep carrying it.
I don't want to have this luggage anymore. I even met with a therapist today, and was talking about some of those exact same things.
BetterHelp offers therapy. BetterHelp is fully online, making therapy affordable and convenient, serving over 5 million people worldwide.
Life isn't about resolutions that fade by February. It's about picking up the pen and becoming the author of your own life.
And you can think of therapy as an editorial partner write your story with better help visit betterhelp.com slash t-h-e-o to get 10 off your first month that's better h-e-l-p betterhelp.com slash t-h-e-o dude your friends were so funny the other night oh the best friend so yeah those are my friends from up um what what i didn't realize was uh one of my friends she's a really big fan and her her boyfriend who was sitting next to you he's an even bigger fan of yours and um that guy i think one of his lips was sweating a little yeah he was losing it and um she had her phone out and she did exactly what i asked her not to do and she had had her flash and she recorded a video. And I was like, she thought she was taking a picture.
Oh, that's hilarious. And she actually took a video and it was like three seconds long of her boyfriend saying, yeah, yeah, yeah, I think so, yeah.
That's all right. I was so embarrassed.
The scary part is if you think somebody recorded your whole conversation, just because then you don't even know what you've said. No, no.
My God, no. Not that you say something crazy.
We're having a good time. No, I would have had to delete that.
I was so upset. You know, like you ask your friends to do one thing, which please don't do that one thing, and they do that one thing.
Yeah. I was like, ah, fuck.
That's being alive. Being alive is interesting.
They made it interesting. Here, right here, Creed reached their highest calendar year earnings in 2024, grossing $64.8 million from 825,000 tickets across 55 performances.

Damn.

That's their highest calendar year earnings?

Is that ever?

Is there any more information with it?

So Creed's never been hotter than right now?

That's crazy to think because weren't they playing stadiums before?

You know what would be a good idea?

I've been saying this is there should be a comedian at the halftime for the Super Bowl. That's a horrible idea.
Yeah. I want to do it.
You do? Yeah. Grace, you would be I would fail miserably.
You think you would? I don't know. Maybe give me, what, 11 years? Oh, 11 years.
Yeah, I thought you were talking about in in a couple of months. Oh, right now? No, no, God, no.
No, I could pull that, though, if I wanted to. It'd be hard.
I think it would be way too scary. It would do, like, half music, half...
You've got to find, like, the good, happy medium between fireworks, music, and jokes. It would be, yeah.
It'd be, like, the worst thing that's ever happened at the Super Bowl thus far I'd be brave of you I would pledge allegiance to that salute on that that would be intense there goes my hero does Creed even sing that song I have no idea truly and honestly it says right there Creed earned more money in 2024 than they did in any other year over the 30-year career. Oh, so they've never been hotter.
Good for them. My hero.
Oh no, it's about Foo Fighters. Oh, shit.
What's Creed? Fucking who knows, dude. I don't know if I'm supposed to say this, but I saw Kid Rock the other night on New Year's.
He looked like he was about to. Like he'd been through it.
Yeah. Oh, yeah.
He looked like Crack Rock, dude. Pull up that video of him from the other night.
No, I saw him with my own eyes. Oh, you did? And he looked like he was about to go out on a stretcher.
Is that always the thing? Is that kind of his deal? No, no, no. That's not always a thing.
Oh, did somebody get a video of him? Yeah, this is it. He definitely...
He looked a lot worse upstairs. He seems pretty healthy right there.
Yeah, I know. He was clean.
A good drinking night out. He was shaking good.
Was he singing? I don't want problems with Kid Rock, actually. Oh, he's the best at taking jokes and telling jokes.
Oh, good. Alright.
Yeah. I thought he had a good time.
I almost went and met him for dinner that night, actually. Oh, really? Have you ever spent time around him? No, just that one hi and bye kind of thing.
You should do his comedy festival. He does a comedy show here every year that Ryman is for charity.
Oh, no shit. It'd be fun to get along.
Oh, hell yeah. If you wanted to, if you guys got to meet and you guys got along um i'm trying to think um you think he'd fuck with me yeah are you fucking with me sweetheart yeah all right i'm fucking with you cool cool cool cool yeah i'm a fan all right let's go i think you're yeah i'm curious to see uh yeah i'm just excited to fucking be along for the ride and see what goes on yeah thank you man I'm really pumped for your movie that sounds like really exciting stuff so when do you start filming that we'll see January 10th yeah I don't want to think too much about it because I think it's what if it's horrible and then it's like you have to put it out oh yeah just enjoy it just enjoy it don't talk about it just do it real G's moving silence like lasagna yeah that kind of shit so that's the kind of shit we're doing I'm trying to think of you you have a new podcast coming out or it's out already uh coming out okay i want to talk about that with a new network uh have you heard the unwell network yep with alex cooper right okay um i never thought a day in my life i'd be a diversity hire but it's all blonde hair blue eye pretty girls there so are you considered a diversity hire yeah you're brewing red-headed? Red-headed.
I just bring a different kind of flavor. Oh, yeah.
Bay leaf, huh? Back bay leaf. Yeah.
Do they have back bay leaves? I think they might. Grace and Malley is officially unwell.
So that means you're officially working with their network. So that's happened.
That's happened, yes. So that happened like right before the new year.
Did you know that was coming? Was there? They hopped on it quick. Did you already separate it from your previous podcast before this happened? Yes.
And so that happened on, I left Barstool on Sunday and then I got the call Monday and we had paper signed by Thursday. Wow.
So it moved pretty quick which was kind of crazy. And is it a better deal than you had at Barstool? Yeah.
Oh, that's good. Yeah, I'm excited about that.
You feel good about it? I feel good, yeah. Except the one thing I'm concerned about is I don't have health insurance anymore and I'm going deaf in my left ear.
Oh, yeah, it's true, huh? So I'm going to have to figure that out. And especially if you start taking on a lot of kicks this year, you're probably going to need some health insurance, you know? I'm going to need a couple of Plan B pills and whatnot.
Oh, yeah, get you a little couple grams of Plan B. Yeah, I'll buy them bulk.
I'll get it from Kid Rock. Yeah, get it something from that ditch on you, dude.
He'll sell you plan b should do a powder huh yeah how great would it be to do a line of plan b dude i would fucking rip that left and right if i had the sex i'd do it goodbye i had uh i had my first uh crazy fan bring me a bag of cocaine to my show the other night. Yeah, that was good.
They know I like this stuff, but they wrote, we love you so much on a bag of cocaine, which I thought was hilarious. So cool.
It's just interesting. Were you able to use any of it or not? I preferred not to just because theantially it was unknown where the origin was from.
Yeah, you know where it's coming from. Yeah, absolutely.
Yeah, dude. My buddy's aunt used to fucking shed like a hole in her throat or whatever and they used to boof cocaine right down it.
That's fucking awesome. That's sick.
Just rocket that shit. I want to get there.
Right through that little bird. You got to be doing something right to get to that point.
Right through that little birdhouse door she had on her neck. It's cuckoo.
Yeah. She had that little birdhouse door.
What else is going on? What else is happening in the news right now? We have not confirmed that the explosion was caused by very large fireworks and or a bomb carried in the bed of the rented Cybertruck and is unrelated to the vehicle itself. Oh, it could have been a fun time or terrorism.
Yeah. Dude, the toughest thing about a Cybertruck, what do you drive, Grace? I don't have my license.
You don't have your license? I live in New York. Oh, you don't even need it, huh? Yeah.
I used to have it, but I just let it expire. I used to drive.
I used to drive. And I had a Lincoln, 2002 Lincoln presidential town car, which is either an elderly person or a pimp.
I don't know if you've ever seen those bad boys. Very prestigious, yeah.
Yeah, three in the front, three in the back. That was the fucking cruiser.
We loved that thing. It was awesome.
Whipping that bitch, boy. That thing was classic.

Whipping work in that bitch, son.

That thing's awesome.

Yeah.

It still smelled like my dead grandpa.

Oh, yeah.

It was good.

All right, Papa.

Yeah.

He's in that bitch for good.

I couldn't wait for him to croak to cop that thing.

You ever are.

Didn't you ever make out on your backseat of that car with any men or anything like that? mean I'm sure you had some dates We had plenty of room for it But I never did And Nora you don't coach her on dating or anything It's hopeless Well it's fine I'm not worried about it But it's just been something that's been in your life. Mm-hmm.
Now, what if a man came along and he's looking for marriage? Do you think that that's something you would actually consider, you think? I mean, at this point, it's starting to be like, well, the older I get and the bigger reaction that I get when I tell people I've never been in a relationship is when I start to think, yeah, I think the next guy will probably be a forever. Might be, huh? Yeah.
He could be a real prick, too. No, grace.
I gotta lock it down. He better be a prince.
He better be. And there's gotta be some, um, I'm trying to think of, like, what's your ideal man? Or do you even have it? It's such a dumb question, isn't it? Who gives a fuck? I'll, I'll, fuck it.
I'll, I'll tell this story. Um, I had a crush on Shane Gillis for a little bit.
Oh, yeah. Big crush.
And I had met him at my work. And I just word vomited.
I was talking to him. And I dropped a sandwich that I was eating.
And he said, are you going to pick that up? And I said, I got to go. And I just left.
Oh, yeah. That kind of thing.
And I just kept running into him. You pick it up, white boy, that kind of shit.
Well, I just got really nervous that I wasn't playing cool at all. Oh, it wasn't a stacked tactics.
No, no, I just, I just, I scrammed out of there. But I just kept running into him that month, like a lot.
And it looked like I was stalking him. And it ended with he hosted Saturday Night Live.
I was at the after party. And I'm like, I'm looking at him.
I'm like, don't look at him. Don't look at him.
And I at him i go hey congrats tonight man he's like yeah thank you so much i said yeah uh bet you're gonna get mad pussy tonight bro oh yeah i don't know yeah right you're not supposed to say that one and uh he said what what did you say i said ah see ya i just left the bathroom line dude I bought him a beer fuck yeah dude no I respect your fucking move that's how I flirt yeah you want this pussy you're never gonna get it whitey don't you come honky honky and around this thing around this little fucking kitty chamber whitey yeah that is that is just like a really great um example of how i operate yeah so it all makes sense right i feel you sometimes i would get so nervous i followed a woman one time for like seven or eight um blocks and i finally caught up to her and i was like i was so nervous i just was like i'm not following you that's what i said fucking walked off yeah I'm not following you and someone was uphill

like like I was so nervous I just was like I'm not following you that's what I said fucking walked off

yeah I'm not following

you and someone was uphill it was like

obvious that I was fucking following her dude

my face was all wet she started

running huh she started running fast

no she's moving quick kind of you know

with pace or whatever

yeah Shane just won cracker

of the year I saw this the other day

this is a new one by him right by Mr. AB I don't know what is this AB he's got he did like a whole like he was giving awards out to everybody this year oh he was? Antonio Brown? yeah funny as Cracker that was his thing when he got to use the n word is that what Antonio said one or something? I got a new goal for next year.
You do? Yeah. This is it? This is it.
Cracker of the year. What do you get to say? The N-word? I think you can do it once.
Alright. It's not even like a month.
It's not that I want to. It's just like it'll be a nice perk.
No. Yeah.
There's got to be a prize. Yeah.
I wonder if you can say it in public or does it have to be alone in the shower or something I mean you can I don't I don't say it I mean I'll think it sometimes loudly or whatever but you will not I'm not that guy somebody in our town used to write it down all the time and throw it in like put a message in a bottle and throw it out into the water and then it'd go downstream and then like some dad and his kid are just walking along the stream and the kid finds it. He's like, what's this? Oh, this is a historic artifact.
It's just sad that that kind of shit is just like... That's unfortunate.
It's that kind of shit that's ruining our waterways. That's what I'm saying.
God damn. Have you ever been in a contest? Did you ever win like a most talented or funniest contest? No, I've lost pretty much everything I've ever tried to do.
Get out of here. Crazy.
Crazy. But, you know, you can't let that stop you.
I lost Class Clown to some girl who dropped out of high school. Nuh-uh.
Yeah. So we did them at the beginning of the year, and she was not there to receive the award at the end of the year.
You should have to stay in school to even be able to do it. That's what I'm saying.
It wasn't fair. And I don't think I was eligible because of just being a shithead.
I had like a 1.5 GPA. Oh, so you were not educated? I was not.
I was too worried about having fun and cracking jokes. Oh, so you were having a good time.
I was blasting off, yeah. Okay.
I wasn't as much of a lose. I just wasn't getting laid.
I was cool. I was having fun.
Were you getting wasted at parties and stuff? Oh, absolutely. People didn't like having me around because if you got stuck with me, you would be dragging me out of the woods.
Yeah. Yeah, I would fall flat.
Oh, really? Yeah. You were fucking just.
I was just. The party stops here, boys.
If a tree falls in the woods, you're going to hear it. It's grace.
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah, we used to have this guy in our town, this fellow. He had, well, a lot of Irish, they've always equated the Irish with like, I don't want to say like a step up from having Down syndrome or whatever, but it's a popular.
No, that's fair, yeah. Right? Like we had a guy in our town.
I've told this story before, but he had Down syndrome and his mom didn't know it, right? Never got the paperwork or the blood test or whatever. And so she just thought he was Irish, right? She thought he's Irish and she's like buying him all this Boston.
Are you talking about Shane? Huh? No. This wasn't Shane.
Shane probably knows the guy. But this was just a local DS guy, you know.
Oh, but his mom would get him all this Boston Celtic shit and Notre Dame shit. It was like, you know, and the train that came in our town didn't even go to Boston.
So he would probably never go to Boston. But whenever he would misbehave or whatever, they would put him in this baby crib even when he was an adult.
And he had this thing where he just would not go out of it. He would stay in the crib.
Like a playpen, not a crib, but like a baby's play little area or whatever. And he would stay in it even like, you know, 14, 15 years old.
Yeah, something like that. What else did I see recently? Oh, there was the LSD, Diplo.
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, Diplo trips on LSD.
What is the most, I'm so curious, what's the most conventional place that you've done LSD? Right now? Right now? Is this one the helicopter? Oh, my God. Yeah.
Please. Oh my God.
Hold on. Hold on.
Hold on. Please tell me.
Look at Anderson. He's probably getting sick from being gay.
Yeah, Diplo is definitely... Every time I'm in Los Angeles, see that guy that guy loves to party yeah he loves to party that's so brave dude to go on live television on LSD oh my god I'd kill myself I really would that's so scary I would smoke my own nuts, bro.
I could not even find it, dude.

I would take my penis off and just fucking hide it in somebody's face, dude.

I could not.

I would freak the fuck out, dude.

He was playing it so cool, too.

So cool.

I would have been scratching my eyes out.

Like, yeah.

I can't.

I did it one time.

You did?

Yeah.

You did LSD when you were on camera?

Yeah.

I wasn't on camera, no. I just, like, in general did it one time.
I didn't like it. Oh, only one time? And where did you guys go? It was after a long day of partying.
We ripped it at three in the morning. So it was a really bad idea.
Yeah. Really bad idea.
Oh, yeah. So I will be doing that anytime soon.
But Molly's a lot better's a lot better she's a sweetheart yeah i like her

oh yeah molly's the other one shit yeah i remember throwing a bunch of rocks at uh a bunch of grass or whatever we thought there was like these little people in it or whatever we thought we kept hearing him yell every time we throw the rock in there it was just children oh half my buddies in the morning half my buddy's driver was in that fucking in his yard dude

we were all sweating and our shoulders were hurting

it was like the neighbors Yeah just fucking just They had like these elephant ear things in the ditch And we thought that like We kept throwing these rocks And I was like listen you can hear these people scream when you throw it in there Get fucking devious on that You are not a one love hippie on LSD. Eighth of a dump truck of driveway gravel into that ditch.
I'm trying to think of some famous LSD trips. I mean, I had some good ones.
I had one where I like it was an LSD. I took mushrooms to a party.
And a lot of people had never taken them and I gave them all to them. And I was like, let's play.
I can go see. And I just counted.
And they all went and hid. And they were all alone with their thoughts.
I never looked for any of them. Wait, that's classic.
I'm still never. You are devious.
I've still never looked for them. Yeah, fuck them, dude.
If they can't handle that fucking mountain lion bitch and get out of the fucking.'t handle their own goddamn dogs and they can get the fuck out of my face and get out the forest big dog huh if you don't want to link up and get out the food chain that's how you like tear your friends like who can handle it who can handle being alone who can Oh, dude, favorite thing ever i used to be with my buddy jeffrey and scotty and nate we'd all be outside smoking uh smoking dope or whatever smoking flour weed or whatever and i'd come back in a few minutes early and jeff's dad would be always sitting in the house just reading the newspaper or whatever and i'd come and i'm like, Mr. like let's go on i'm like uh just jeff was being kind of i don't know like he just

he kept taking his shirt off or whatever and mr mike had issues with like gay yeah i saw that

coming so the second i was like he had his shirt off whatever he'd be like

you could feel his fucking teeth just climbing over his tongue through the newspaper

I'm sorry. The second I was like, he had his shirt off, whatever.
He'd be like. You could feel his fucking teeth just climbing over his tongue through the newspaper, right? He'd be like.
And so I would just plant that seed, dude. I would just go.
And they would come in. They'd be stoned out of their brain.
They'd come in the house. And he'd be like, Jeffrey! And he'd fucking have them come in there.
He'd just roast them for being homosexuals. What are you doing out there with your fucking shirt off? And Jeff's stoned out of his face, has no idea what's going on.
And he'd say in the house behind him, like, yeah. Why are you being such a gay homo? Oh, it was a good time.
I mean, it was just, it wasn't a worse. So you like throwing your boys under the bus.
I like fucking being the bus driver and all the seats are under the bus. Nice.
That's what I like. And it's short too.
Yeah, I just like that. I like just creating something, right? Like, let's see what happens here if we set this thing up this way.
Let's some chaos um there was that one famous story who's the famous there was uh two members of i think fleetwood mac that took lsd oh wow there it is the night that fleetwood mac lost peter green and danny kirwin to lsd yeah what was this guy it's all uh amid a manic psychedelic party in a commune-like mansion. Green, I think it's Peter Green is the guy's name, was drawn down into the basement and arrived out of the other side in tears.
In the band's eyes, he was distraught, despite Green claiming to have had an extraordinary experience and stating that he played the best guitar of his life down there. Another member of the band present that day was Danny Kerwin.
Fate also besieged him that night. Peter Green and Danny Kerwin both went together to that house in Munich.
Okay, that's where they were after a show. Their one-time manager, Clifford Davis, recalls, both of them took acid, as I understand.
Both of them, as of that day, became seriously mentally ill. It would be too much of a coincidence for it to be anything other than taking drugs as of that day.
Of fear, the rest of the band felt an intense sense of dread in that place and managed to scurry away with the two heavily intoxicated members. While Green would recover and enjoy a creative life away from the spotlight, despite persistent problems, things fared differently for Kerwin.
Danny had been a nervous and sensitive lad from the start.

He was never really suited to the rigors of the business,

Mick Fleetwood once opined.

Touring his heart and the routine wears us all down.

One night while backstage,

this regression came to the fore.

Danny was being odd about tuning his guitar.

Mick Fleetwood remembers.

He got up suddenly and bashed his head into the wall,

splattering blood everywhere.

I've never seen him do anything violent. In all the years I'd known him, the rest of us were paralyzed in complete shock.
Damn. He was wonderful, but he couldn't handle the life, eventually ending up homeless on the streets of London.
Wow. Damn.
Sounds like a Tuesday. Yeah.
That's what happens, dude. That's my biggest fear.
Is it really of something bad? Getting schizophrenic. Really Really? Yeah, it freaks me out It doesn't even run in the family But that sounds scary Yeah, I think taking a hit of acid or something And next thing you know You don't know what you're doing Yeah Actually, it might run in the family I got a cousin like that You do? yeah it's tough and it's a man or woman? both god yeah that's a thing dude I would just I don't know if I could be a man and a woman do you think you could handle it? I think I do a good job already I'm saying manly shit to men to flirt with them huh? get Like, yeah, fucking get some tail tonight, brother.
Like, what? Yeah, huh? Euclid's up! Pedroia! Let's go Brady! Come on now! Deflate these balls! God. Yeah, that's the unfortunate truth.
Who's on my Mount Rushmore, I wonder? Yeah. From where you're from.'re from oh from where i'm from i'm trying to think of my boston one oh my boston one would be is it okay if i do a boston one oh please please be my guest um oh uh will hunting so you got him you got tom brady you got Oh, Dutch Smith from, um, bring up Dutch Smith.

This is him. Following an arson over the weekend, police say a teenager is responsible for all that damage.
Please watch 16th's Nikki Crys. Join us live from the Central Pennsylvania Newsroom with more tonight, Nikki.
Julie, a lot of people in Shemokin are upset that Dunkin' Donuts is closed because they didn't have anywhere else to go for coffee and donuts. Today we also learn new information about the teenage girl police charged with setting the place on fire.
Yellow tape surrounds the Dunkin Donuts on West Sunbury Street in Shemokin. The popular donut shop is closed until further notice because of extensive fire damage.
There's a lot of people that's definitely going to miss it, no doubt about it. A teenager is charged with starting a fire inside the restaurant on Saturday night.
Go further down. They start interviewing people.
Oh, back up. Back.
Many people who live in Shemokin are upset that Dunkin' Donuts is closed. Now I have to rely on myself to go to maybe a Turkey Hill or something where I don't like their donuts.
I'd rather the donuts at Dunkin' DonED. NOW I HAVE TO RELAY ON MYSELF TO GO TO MAYBE A TURKEY HILL OR SOMETHING WHERE I DON'T LIKE THEIR DONUTS.
I RATHER THE DONUTS AT DUNKIN DONUTS. AND I'M KIND OF DEALING WITH IT, BUT I REALLY MISS DUNKIN DONUTS.
I GO THERE EVERY DAY. I GET A CHICKEN BAKER CROSANT OR I GET SOME COFFEE, POWERADE, IF I'M DEHYDRATED.
I SIT THERE ALL THE TIME. IF I HAVE ANY LEGAL WORK THAT I NEED TO DO, I GO THERE.
I MEET WITH MY ATTORNEYS THERE. I'M GOING TO MISS THAT there I'm gonna miss that place if it don't open up That's classic A lot of my friends go in there Get the cold coffee With iced coffee I guess it's called What a fucking motley crew that is So the guy in the middle was like Yeah I get stayed dehydrated Meet my attorney up there attorney up there, my boy Dutch Smith.
He's on my- He's on your mom restaurant? He's on my mom restaurant. Is he also on your team? I feel like you know him.
The Dunkin' Donuts over there. I got to talk to my lawyers.
He's like, I got to do some legal work. When you got to do legal work, you got to go to talks.
That's classic. Oh, yeah.
What do they call up there? Ice cold coffee? Ice coffee? That lady. That was good.
What do they call it? Cold coffee? He's a freaking crazy person. I'm like, oh, yeah.
Meet me at the dunks on 15th and 2nd. We'll get to the legal work.
We got some legal work. That is so good.
And you know he's not studying to be a lawyer. No.
Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
You know. Yeah.
You know he's not studying to be a lawyer Yeah, yeah, yeah You know, yeah

You know he's not studying to be a lawyer

Can you do accents?

Do I do them?

Can you do accents? Yeah

No, I can't really do them that much, I don't think

Sometimes I wish I spent more time focusing on stuff like that

Yeah

What about you?

I can just do Irish

Yeah?

Yeah

But under pressure it's pretty hard

But you just really have to emphasize ours, really

Are you really?

the Yeah. What about you? I can just do Irish.
Yeah? Yeah. But under pressure, it's pretty hard, but you just really have to emphasize the arse, really.
Are you really? Truly and honestly, yeah. Truly and honestly, yeah.
How are you going? I do it a wee little bit, but here and there is a good party trick if you do it. Oh, yeah.
But it's not really going to take me far in life, is it? Yeah. take it back to Ireland.
That's fine. Yeah, I'm bad.
But I think maybe if I, it'd be fun to work on, I guess. I don't know.
Yeah, I think, I like it. You did a good job.
No, thanks. Have you toured in Ireland yet? No.
You got to wait. No.
You got to wait. I'm new ski.
Yeah, sorry. What are we talking about? I'm brand new.
Yeah, I shouldn't have said that. Which is probably why I have nothing to talk about.
That's okay. No, you're great to talk to.
Oh. Grace O'Malley, I love, I'm glad I've gotten to sit and chat with you.
If you guys don't know Grace, now you probably do. I think you have a good, I think, did we talk about your life enough, do you think? Yeah, sure.
Okay. Yeah.
Oh, did you finish college or not? No, I dropped out. You did? Yeah.
But by the time I dropped out of college, I had a 4.0. You did? Yeah, I found out what Adderall was.
Oh, so you were using it. So I needed it.
Yeah. As it turned out.
The Irish need it. What are the Irish missing? There's always that thing, you know? They're missing out on, well, the fathers are missing out on loving their children.
Yeah. They don't know how to express it.
Yeah oh yeah they can't huh yeah they can't yeah it's like they just get you a fucking edelman jersey yeah they just hope that'll that'll equate to love it's good yeah why can't they do it well sharing a beer in silence that's that's also supposed to be love in their eyes really? Yeah Why do the Irish have that trouble sharing love?

Maybe And if people listen

They can hit the hotline too with that

985-664-9503

And that would be great to

I want to examine that next time we have a solo episode

Why the Irish have that trouble

Expressing their love

Do you think that they have it more than other cultures?

Let's think to compare

The Koreans can't do it. They can't.
No, they can't. Tough.
Is it tough love or is it just no love? Well, there's a video. You see that.
I think Steve, look up Stevie Weeby. He just put that video of him, Bobby and their mother trying to do Christmas together or something something.
Can you see that if you put it on his Instagram? The Koreans, I don't think they can do it. Bobby's the Asian representative.
Bobby is... I want to say he may be.
You like it? I know. You like it? Yeah.
Yeah. Late at night and I leave Duke here by himself.
He loses his mind, huh? No, Duke. Because you have no snacks here.
I got hungry. So there she's been drinking.
No, it was six in the morning. So what happened last night was I wanted some snacks, so I went to 7-Eleven.

I got a slurpee.

That's good.

This is like that game show, like that telephone game or whatever.

Can you see where Bobby comes in later or not?

Is there any?

Can you help me out?

Get further down.

Further, further.

Trivial closed captions.

No, maybe not.

The mother is very endearing.

I would love to meet her.

She's probably a star that I would like to meet.

Yeah.

Who's up there for you?

Who haven't you met?

And who, on top of that, who was your favorite thus far?

I don't know.

I got to meet Mel Gibson one time and he was very captivating.

Yeah, that's wild.

It's very like you get drawn into him, you know? You sit down and like shoot the shit with him? Yep. Yeah.
Yeah, I did get to one time, which is crazy because Patriot's my favorite movie probably. Was there anything else that we wanted to talk about? You have any of our topics, anything you want to look at really quick? I'm just trying to think, Grace, before I let you go.
Yeah. Oh, wait.
So your new podcast. Yes.
Tell me about it. Okay, so it is going to be coming out in February.
That's great. Everything is completely up in the air right now.
Trying to figure out what the hell it's going to be. But for the most part, the idea for it is the name's going to be Disgraceful.
And I'm going to have guests on every week. And for the first 15 to 20 minutes, they're auditioning to be my new co-host because i i need a new co-host so that's like the niche there and then after that hopefully we'll we'll shoot the shit i'll uh get to practice in a little more and be a little better for for that so what are you looking for in your coast you already have a parameters um that's the thing it's all just a gimmick i'm never i'm never probably gonna have Oh, you're not.
We'll see how it goes. But there is possibility, though.
Possibility. Like Alex suggested.
Alex Cooper. Alex Cooper suggested that.
From Call Her Daddy. Yeah.
So I had pitched her my idea for this podcast. And she was like, yeah, that's awesome.
But what if you did a podcast with like Blake Griffin? I'm like, what? So that's the idea that she has for it so we're gonna figure out something um something somewhere in the middle something like that yeah that was just like a little behind the scenes kind of phone call so we'll see how it goes will she have a say in it will you have a say it will it just be is it up to you i get final say yeah so i think think I'm going to stick to my guns. Yeah.

Yeah, I think just trust your instincts.

Yeah.

Whatever your instincts are, I love them.

Thanks.

Right back at you.

They're fun.

Your instincts are fun to ride along with.

The Down for Anything tour that's going on right now.

Yep.

And despite everything I've said on this podcast, it is a good show.

So come on out.

Oh, yeah.

I believe that it is. I almost stayed.
I wanted to say that. I i think i got nervous there were so many girls in there a lot of girls yeah it's a it's like a slumber party yeah and then i i just my whole time i'm just trying to make the boyfriends laugh yeah because they don't want to be there oh so i like really try my best to make them laugh the most you know what's so funny about comedy a lot of times you'd be on stage and it's all dates there.
And so you're like, so not only are you like the kind of like, if you're the lonely one, if you're, if you're the one that doesn't have a boyfriend or girlfriend, you're, then you're also provide, you're the entertainment, right? They're paying for sure. But then they all have, and then you're like, oh, it just builds up this.
Sometimes they can build up this weird fucking resentment. Yeah, totally.
I mean, um, I just did a new Year's Eve show, so everyone, three, two, one, everyone started kissing. I'm like, I'm still on stage by myself.
It's like a double whammy fuck you. I was like, this is nice.
This is fun. And what do you do then? You throw a couple fingers in the hoo-ha? What do you do at that point? I just, uh, I started, uh, I just grabbed the bouncer, just fucked him on stage there.
No, I started, I started shotgunning beers. So I felt less lonely.
Yes, I swear to God. There you are, Gracie.
We're going to fucking, we're going to send some cats your way this year, Gracie, baby. Yeah.
We're going to send you a boatload of cats. Yeah.
Fuck this year, that's for sure. Your dad might be in this, okay.
And why do they say cock up there in masks? Cock. Yeah.
Yeah. It's just, there's no way, there's no, it's not a way for a woman to talk.

Yuck.

Yeah.

Yeah, dude, I was going in, I had a show right outside of, not Medford, I don't know where it is.

Is that right outside of the city?

Medford, yeah.

Medford?

That's a town.

And I had a show right out there, and some guy's walking up with his wife, they're eating a piece of pizza, and he's like, Doris, that's the guy, we're to give him your pizza. Give him your pizza.
And Doris, they're both eating. You can tell they just got a snack.
They're running over. They're running a few minutes late.
I'm like, don't get here. He's like, give me a fucking pizza, Doris.
You fucking bitch. So now, yeah.
I love this guy. Yeah, that's how he is.
I don't love you. Yeah, yeah, fuck it.
I want to see him, Doris. So Doris gives me her pizza and then they go inside.

The guy's just eating. Like, will you

fucking enjoy that? Oh my god.

I'm just like, what?

Yeah, that's the kind of guys up there.

They'll throw their wives

across a car to

impress their boys. Oh, yeah.

They're kind of gay for it.

Oh, they're definitely. Just to get a whiff of Padroia's fucking catcher's mitt.
Yeah. All right.
I think we've had enough. I think we've had a good start to the year.
Any res, anything that you're trying to push on yourself this year? I know maybe love is in the air. That's always in the air.
Yeah. Anything else you're kind of like? Is there a a real goal that you have or something this year? I get porked at least once.
Okay. And then we'll get.
Getting slammed. Now we talking.
We're talking. I'll take it wherever I can get it.
Whoa. This is a Christian program.
Oh, is it now? My apologies. So you're right at home.
Go ahead. Yeah, no.
And then I'm trying to cut back on drinking I have a drinking problem I'm a functioning alcoholic big time so I'm trying to kick back I'm going to start with the dry January and see where that goes so you're tapping back in so for the rest of January you're off I missed the first day but to do? That's still December in some places. Yeah, right? In Holland, I think.
Yeah, they're behind. Yeah, it's like.
I'm on Holland time. Fuck it.
I'm on Holland time. Okay.
What about you? What about me? No, I'm going to try to be sober all year, I think. But any New Year's resolution? Resolutions, yeah.
I'm going to try to be more pertinent with my time. Like, don't waste time in things that I know.
Like, I think with relationship stuff, don't waste, like, dating time and things that maybe don't have a chance kind of thing. That's fair.
I don't know. So stop dating girls with no personality.
Yeah, just if I know it's not really there, don't just kind of use the situation just because maybe

I'm lonesome or something. Yeah.

Or just because I don't have anybody to go

do, you know, just be like, well, just do shit by myself

then sometimes or just be by myself or whatever.

It's not all that bad. Right.
It's not that bad.

Yeah. Do it all the time.

And then, um,

and then...

Your nightmare is my everyday.

I don't know.

And then, I don't know and then I don't know get out there and fucking

do some sex maybe

I don't know something else

I don't know

I'd like to read a little bit more maybe this year

you read a lot

last year?

not as much as I'd have liked

but just cause I wanna have that slow time

your thoughts are slowed down and you're just kind of relaxing

I feel like my brain gets so sped up

Thank you. a lot last year.
Not as much as I'd have liked. But just because I want to have that slow time where your thoughts are slowed down

and you're just kind of relaxing,

you know.

I feel like my brain gets so sped up.

Yeah, I can't.

I don't know how to slow it down.

Yeah, slow it down

and maybe pray, pray.

Yeah, pray if I meet a wife

or something.

2020 Y, if that's where I'm at.

There you go.

2020 Y.

It could happen, dude.

That's good.

I like that.

Welcome to cum, country.

Yeah, there you go.

Then you can hang out

with your other friends.

Yeah. We're coming over.
I got me a bride now. Yeah.
Look at her. Look at her.
She give me pizza. Doris.
Grace O'Malley, thank you so much for coming. Nora O'Malley, thank you for coming too.
And cheers and blessings to you guys. Happy New Year.
Happy New Year, man. Thank you very much.
It was an honor, truly and honestly. And same for me.
And best of luck with Disgraceful. It comes out in February? Yes.
Okay, on the Unwell Network. Hell yeah.
Amen. Hell yeah.
Now I'm just floating on the breeze And I feel I'm falling like these leaves I must be cornerstone Oh, but when I reach that ground, I'll share this peace of mind I found.

I can feel it in my bones.

But it's gonna take a little time.