201. What We’re Watching, Reading & Listening to Right Now

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Speaker 2 Welcome to We Can Do Hard Things. Are we recording?

Speaker 3 Yes. How many of these episodes have we done 200 episodes? And every single time, folks, Glennon doesn't get the process.

Speaker 2 That's because I have beginner's mind.

Speaker 3 You sure do.

Speaker 3 You sure do. She starts talking and we haven't even hit the record button.

Speaker 2 Okay, everybody. So welcome to We Can Do Hard Things, where we're going to be recording.
We're going to be sweet and kind to each other.

Speaker 3 Oh, okay.

Speaker 2 This is an utterly thrilling episode because we finally get to talk about one of my favorite subjects besides coffee and boundaries and gender

Speaker 2 and how forgiveness is not really a thing.

Speaker 3 Something tells me we're going to get to those in the course of this conversation.

Speaker 2 We're talking about TV today. We're going to talk about what we are

Speaker 2 watching,

Speaker 2 reading, all of the things that we are consuming

Speaker 2 because

Speaker 2 sometimes it feels like Abby and I spend most of our life just sitting on the couch trying to figure out what to watch.

Speaker 2 Do you think that that is true?

Speaker 3 Well, not most, there's a lot of time spent into what should we watch? What should we watch? We're Googling

Speaker 3 TV series on television 2023.

Speaker 2 Yes, just in case someone has written a new article. That's what I do every single night.
And truly, what I want to say is I think sometimes

Speaker 2 I am trying to

Speaker 2 be more erudite

Speaker 2 than I am.

Speaker 3 That's smart, right?

Speaker 2 Yes.

Speaker 3 Educated. It's very erudite.

Speaker 2 But the truth is that most of my life, no matter what I'm doing, no matter what it is,

Speaker 2 all I'm trying to do is get back to my couch to watch TV. That's it.

Speaker 2 Like if I'm at the most amazing thing, if I'm at a kid's thing, if I'm taking a walk, if I'm enjoying nature, really what I'm trying to do

Speaker 2 is just get back to the couch and turn on the television.

Speaker 3 Why do you think that is?

Speaker 2 I love coziness.

Speaker 3 It is your homeostasis point.

Speaker 2 Yes, because I'm a home sexual.

Speaker 3 Okay.

Speaker 3 I am. There it is.
There it is. There's the sexuality.

Speaker 3 We got it in, people. Thank you for coming to Week and New Hard Things.

Speaker 2 Couch is my church.

Speaker 2 Because I freaking love my family so much. And I love my couch.
and I love togetherness with the family where no one's talking.

Speaker 2 We're all together, but we're staring. It's like the campfire.
We're at a campfire, but without any mosquitoes.

Speaker 3 I have a theory about this for you. What? Because I think that there's a small part of you that kind of feels like that isn't

Speaker 3 the best way to be living a life from like an erudite's perspective, right?

Speaker 2 Oh, I panic. I panic when we do it too much.

Speaker 3 Yeah, you, you really do. You have limits on how many shows we can watch in a row.
If she says at any point, you want to watch the next one, like my inside, I'm just so excited.

Speaker 2 That's Abby's sexuality. It really is.

Speaker 3 My theory is

Speaker 3 you spend so much of your day living inside of your brain and now your body and the way you're working through stuff internally.

Speaker 3 I think that you actually, your body and your mind is telling you, I need to have a shutoff valve to this. Yes.

Speaker 3 And you get to escape your own personal drama and enter into somebody else's, whether it's mindless or not.

Speaker 2 Yes. Do you remember that show that was like wrestling and it would be like Randy Macho Man Savage? Like that wrestling

Speaker 3 WWF. Right.

Speaker 2 Like every once in a while they'd be wrestling, wrestling, wrestling, and then they would tap out. They would be like, I'm too tired.
I'm done. I feel like life is one big wrestling match.

Speaker 2 And I'm like struggling and like throwing haymakers

Speaker 3 all day. And then you're bringing in a fucking wrestling analogy to me.

Speaker 3 That's what I think of you when I think of you. I continue to

Speaker 3 be almost exactly like.

Speaker 3 Randy, what was his name? Not

Speaker 3 Randy Savage.

Speaker 2 The point is, life is a wrestling match and sometimes you have to tap out.

Speaker 2 And since I think maybe some people who don't have any tap outs left, who are out of tap outs, like booze, like tapped out of tap outs.

Speaker 2 I'm tapped out of tap outs. My tap out is television because being a human

Speaker 2 is intolerable. It's hard.
After a certain point in the day.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 3 Have you read lessons in chemistry?

Speaker 2 Oh my God, it's on my list to discuss today.

Speaker 3 Okay. Well, do you know the part where they're trying to convince her to do a, um, that TV show? And the guy explains the psychology and he calls it the afternoon depression zone, where

Speaker 3 our circadian rhythms were made to sleep at night and have a siesta. Yes.
But we're one of the only cultures that refuses to allow ourselves the rest. So our body needs it.

Speaker 3 So we zone out in front of the TV in the afternoon depression zone. And that's why they make those shows just barely engaging enough so that you can kind of disassociate from yourself.

Speaker 3 Basically, that means you should just be going to sleep.

Speaker 2 Well, it's so true. Abby does that.
Abby takes a nap every afternoon. And my God

Speaker 2 did it for the first couple years

Speaker 2 to like a couple of weeks ago to make me want to die because it was like, what are you doing?

Speaker 3 You are.

Speaker 2 just

Speaker 2 resting at me.

Speaker 2 That is the way it's supposed to be. The The siesta is that's why Abby is such a happy person.
And that's why we all, why do we all need the caffeine right at 2.30 or 3 o'clock?

Speaker 2 Or why do we all start crashing? Because we're supposed to crash, but we fight our natural rhythms.

Speaker 3 Sister, what is your relationship to television?

Speaker 2 Also, have you read lessons in chemistry?

Speaker 3 Or did you just read an article about?

Speaker 2 I,

Speaker 3 well, I had to bring it up because it's the only

Speaker 3 second book that I've read outside of this podcast in the past 24 months.

Speaker 3 How to raise an adult.

Speaker 3 Yeah,

Speaker 3 the show is sponsored by How to Raise an Adult because I've been reading it for six months because it's like 300 pages long, and that's how long it takes me to read that monk.

Speaker 2 The good news is, Sissy, by the time you're done, Bobby Nouse will be adults.

Speaker 3 And so it'll still be applicable, that book. I'll be like, I did it.

Speaker 3 Okay, so I'll tell you what. For this podcast, you told me how to watch a TV show.
So I did watch it. And I will tell you what,

Speaker 3 TV is infuriating because they don't let you watch it at like 1.5.

Speaker 3 So I listen to all audiobooks and I listen to podcasts and I'm like, why are they talking so slow? Why is TV so like they're like, hello?

Speaker 3 I am Mary.

Speaker 3 And I realize it's because I'm so used to 1.5 on everything that I'm like, oh no, I guess that's how people normally talk.

Speaker 2 Sister, I think that this is a metaphor. for you.

Speaker 2 I think you are used to 1.5 in most things.

Speaker 2 And that is why normal human beings and our rhythms drive you batshit crazy.

Speaker 3 Yeah. Because the whole world to you sounds like,

Speaker 3 hello.

Speaker 3 But I did. And it was odd.

Speaker 3 But I don't just watch TV.

Speaker 2 I don't know. But also, do you think that it's because it's a different intention? Like you're just trying to get through something.

Speaker 2 So you speed it up, whereas some people are using it as like an actual decompressing time. So the speed isn't the problem because they're not trying to just like finish it.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I'm sure. If you're trying to like make your brain go slower, probably

Speaker 3 doing it at double speed is not conducive with that.

Speaker 3 So you do like, if everyone else can watch this episode in an hour, I can watch it in 35.

Speaker 3 Do you think that there's any evidence or

Speaker 3 something that is like really positive around

Speaker 3 tapping out? out because I actually think that that's like a really important thing for people and realize that watching TV is a privilege for some folks, right?

Speaker 2 Oh, when I had little kids, there was not

Speaker 3 a huge privilege. But I do think for high-functioning people who need to go at 1.5 speed, do you think that maybe it would be helpful if you had like this one hour every night that you slow down?

Speaker 2 Honey, can you talk faster so she can understand you?

Speaker 3 Yeah. I'm like, God, you could have said that a lot more efficiently.
I like a family movie night. We do those sometimes.

Speaker 3 Like we went through all the Star Wars during COVID, and that was really fun. I really enjoyed that.

Speaker 3 I like to watch the sports.

Speaker 3 It's like a bonding thing with Bobby and me. We'll watch baseball games.
Oh, yeah. That's fun.
Those are like points to watch the grass grow. But you know what? You know what? Sports

Speaker 3 baseball is underrated. I feel like baseball is an analogy for a human.
You look on the outside, it looks like you're doing like three things, but you are actually doing a hundred things

Speaker 3 for every one thing that you see. So I'm into baseball now.
I also,

Speaker 3 the March Madness, really fun. So it's a thing with some intention.
Like we're doing a thing here.

Speaker 2 Exactly.

Speaker 3 Rather than like the mindless thing. Check.
Yeah. It's like a communal experience.
We did that. It's a communal experience for sure for you.

Speaker 2 In terms of the tapping out from being human, I think I may have mentioned this before that I am obsessed with this, but you know, those circuit breakers, you know, those boxes in the garage that have

Speaker 2 the row of things that when the lights go out?

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 So

Speaker 2 being human is like one of those boxes, and everybody just has to like, it gets too hot.

Speaker 3 And then you have to flip it.

Speaker 2 to stop being human for a while. And then if you don't, the whole house burns down.

Speaker 2 Right. So like, what are your,

Speaker 2 I'm done

Speaker 2 flipping the circuit breaker switch thing if it's not TV and it's not booze anymore.

Speaker 3 Crickets.

Speaker 3 She doesn't have any.

Speaker 3 Oh my God. I should look into that.
I'll make that a project.

Speaker 2 If anyone has any podcasts about relaxing that sister could listen to at 0.1.5.

Speaker 3 Yeah. I want your 10-minute meditation, but make it three.
I have a a follow-up question. Do you wear that? Do you wear this as a badge of honor, though? Like, truly?

Speaker 3 I mean, probably, but I think I'm getting over that now. I think I feel

Speaker 3 over it.

Speaker 2 Okay.

Speaker 3 Your kids are also now at a certain age where you get to actually tap back into it. Like when the kids are young, it's hard.
You can't.

Speaker 3 I'm looking forward to it. It is, it is in the three-year plan for sure.
Hold on.

Speaker 3 Here's what I have to tell you. You can do this in three days.
You can figure this out in three days.

Speaker 3 If you feel like this is something that would benefit your life, I can give you a much longer list than we're going to go through today of how to best optimize your relaxation one-hour period at the end of the day.

Speaker 3 I mean, Abby Wambach, I have 99 problems, and a lack of a list is not one. Okay, I got a lot of lists.
That's why I don't have a lot of things.

Speaker 3 But there's not a list of things that you can be doing to fucking relax and to enjoy life.

Speaker 2 I think this is another pod.

Speaker 3 I'm so upset by this because there's nobody on the planet that deserves it more than you and your sister. Like you work so hard, and we will always think that you are the most worker.

Speaker 3 Like you won it. You won.
I'll send you the medal. I will make a medal and I'll send it to you.

Speaker 2 And also, P.S., it can't just be forever that there's so many lists that you can't relax because there's always going to be so many lists forever.

Speaker 3 It's true.

Speaker 2 You know, it's not like you're just about to run out of lists.

Speaker 3 It's true. All right.
Come on.

Speaker 3 That's another psychology. Okay.
I'm not on trial here, people.

Speaker 3 You know what we don't talk enough about?

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Speaker 3 Let's talk about what we are watching.

Speaker 2 Also, all of you type A perfectionist over functioners. Could you please help us with maybe some things

Speaker 2 that we could send to sister for ideas? And if you could camouflage them

Speaker 2 as

Speaker 2 productive,

Speaker 3 just help us.

Speaker 2 Okay, some things we're watching. And we're just going to go through a few things today because we actually watch a lot of shit.
But

Speaker 2 yellow jackets.

Speaker 2 We're watching yellow jackets. A lot of people are watching yellow jackets.
Now, first of all, what you need to know about yellow jackets is it's a good Venn diagram of Abby and I's genres because

Speaker 2 it's gross and scary

Speaker 3 and horrifying.

Speaker 2 So it's in Abby's genre.

Speaker 2 but it's also like kind of feminist.

Speaker 2 It's like Lord of the Flies,

Speaker 2 but

Speaker 2 girls, for a girls' soccer team,

Speaker 2 which maybe that's why they call it yellow jackets as a nod to the flies, Lord of the Flies. They're both insects.
Maybe not. Okay, this is what's going to happen.

Speaker 2 I'm going to say things that are going to have nothing to do with anything,

Speaker 3 but they're.

Speaker 2 conclusions I've made from these shows. Okay.
Soccer team, high school soccer team.

Speaker 2 They go to nationals on an airplane. Airplane crashes on an island.

Speaker 2 Or I don't know. I don't know where the hell they are.

Speaker 3 And neither do they.

Speaker 2 Neither do they. There's the shop, and it's a group of girls and then a couple guys.
It's very strange and eerie and confusing. I would say it's very confusing.

Speaker 3 It's riddled with more questions than answers. Right.

Speaker 2 And I've almost given up on it a couple of times because of the grossness and scariness.

Speaker 2 But it's cool to me because it's a bunch of girls together that are not in the male gaze at all.

Speaker 2 There's no male gaze. So all of these girls together are just being fully human with each other.
They're just the subjects of the show. They're not objects.

Speaker 2 And they are fully human with each other in ways that we don't normally see women, like animalistic ways, like fully human as animals almost. And they all have these

Speaker 2 fatal flaws, they're personalities that are strengths, but you can see later because we go into their middle-aged years, it's like back and forth from the island.

Speaker 3 They're still on the island?

Speaker 2 They're on the island as teenagers. It's a flashback.

Speaker 3 Oh,

Speaker 3 they're not middle-aged on the island. No, that'd be awesome.

Speaker 2 But you see the connection between these like terrifying bonds that they made with each other when they, it was the worst experience of their life, but maybe they were the most alive.

Speaker 3 And you see them not able to let go of that in their middle age and you see so it's like about attachment theory it's about attachment theory yeah but the juxtaposition between being in survival mode and that these young women are trying they're they're having to become in some ways animals to survive

Speaker 3 i think it's really such a beautiful story and then you flash forward into their middle age and how they still have that in them and they're still in survival mode.

Speaker 2 Yeah. And it's like about like we're all in survival mode all the time.
And it's like girls together.

Speaker 2 And it's like how we just like love each other and hate each other and protect each other and kill each and each other and eat each other up.

Speaker 3 And like, it's just and how they have to play certain roles in their middle age. And like you can see the internal conflict.
So it's like they had this opportunity to become really untamed.

Speaker 3 in a crazy way. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
And then fast forward to their middle age. And then they have to to do this reverse taming, which yeah, and they can't get away from each other.

Speaker 2 Yeah. Like they hate each other, but can't find meaning apart from each other.

Speaker 3 They're trauma bonded.

Speaker 2 Yes, which is life, right? It's just being a girl, being a woman, like they're trauma bonded by life. And Melanie Linsky, she's so freaking good in it.
They're also good.

Speaker 2 And it's very cool when you think about like in a world of all we want to do is take BuzzFeed quizzes and figure out who we are. We are always talking about Tish and Abby and I watch it together.

Speaker 2 We're always talking about like which ones, which tragic flaws in them most relate to us.

Speaker 3 Yeah, that was a horrible question. They posed to me the other, the other day.
Tish was like, who do you think I am? And who do you think mom is? Which character?

Speaker 3 And I was like, this is a trick question.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 3 I don't know how to answer this.

Speaker 2 But we decided that you were a mixture of Van and Taisa

Speaker 2 because your

Speaker 2 beautiful, tragic, fatal flaw is loyalty and leadership. These beautiful things that can go either way.
Loyalty can save you or kill you. Leadership can save you or get you killed.

Speaker 2 All of these things. And then Tish was Juliet Lewis.
There's this one character that just beats to her own drum the whole time and is like individualistic. Her name's Natalie, Nat.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 2 And she

Speaker 2 also has a very like just constant what the fuck is going on vibe where everyone else gets eased into this new reality. And she's like, this is not normal.
Yep. And that's Tish.

Speaker 3 So yellow jackets, check it out. Should

Speaker 3 maybe.

Speaker 3 All right.

Speaker 2 Succession. We are watching it.
We've been, we have watched succession religiously. We are

Speaker 2 into succession, which is so weird because, well, succession is about this family that is based on both the Murdochs and the Fox News Empire and kind of King Lear. It's like a King Lear story.

Speaker 2 Who's going to take over this empire and this man who's just this Murdoch Lear type, just ruthless, soulless,

Speaker 2 but it's also very billionaire world and capitalism and what happens at the top. And And on the surface, it's about wildly wealthy people.

Speaker 2 But if you were going to make an anti-capitalist commercial, you would make succession because this family and world is so void of, it's just soulless and vapid and lack of love. It's fascinating.

Speaker 2 I never know what's going on because they're always doing, every minute I'm like, what's happening now? Because it's all very like businessy language.

Speaker 2 But I get the vibe. Okay.
So I never know what's happening really, but I know how everyone's feeling. And

Speaker 2 there was the scene in the last one. Spoil alert.
All of this is a spoiler. Logan Roy, the dad,

Speaker 2 dies. And

Speaker 2 I think that this last episode of Succession, which the pod squad will be hearing this behind, it should win awards because the whole show is based on sort of this

Speaker 2 controllers of the world. They control the whole world.
They think they control the whole world.

Speaker 2 Everything is black card to black card and jet to whatever, like making all these deals, control, control, control, kings of the world and then

Speaker 2 logan royd dies just unceremoniously immediately he's on the floor of a plane and it is the scene where

Speaker 2 they are up in the air the dad has died and the three kids who have spent this entire series just trying to get control trying to get power power power control are rendered

Speaker 2 powerless. They're trying to undo this death.
There's the scene where one of the kids is outside saying to the people on the plane, No, no, no, this is not going to happen. Get me the pilot.

Speaker 2 I want to talk to the pilot. And the dude's like, you can't talk to the pilot.
He's flying the plane. Can't control death.

Speaker 2 And it's like this moment where capitalism and control and whiteness and power rendered completely impotent by death, by like the ultimate truth. It's just this proof of like all of this shit is just

Speaker 2 rearranging chairs on the titanic and the visualization of all of this fake power that is just absolutely powerless

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Speaker 2 Abby and I are obsessed with documentaries too.

Speaker 2 Documentary makes me feel like it's the best of all worlds because it's like reading a book together.

Speaker 3 It's like TV 1.5. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 It feels like I'm making myself smarter, but I'm still just sitting here.

Speaker 2 So I watched a documentary recently that I want everybody to watch. I thought it was really wonderful.
And it was called Calendar Girls.

Speaker 2 And it's about this group of women who are probably in their like 60s, 70s, 80s

Speaker 2 who start a dance group. Imagine like a drill team from high school, like your drill team.
Okay. They do choreography.

Speaker 2 They travel and perform at retirement homes and local fairs, and they are so serious about it. And it's so beautiful.

Speaker 2 And there's this dynamic in it where the men in their lives, in some of their lives, can't deal with it.

Speaker 3 It's too much. It's too much.
Their careers are taking them away.

Speaker 2 Well, yes.

Speaker 2 But it's sad and serious. On the surface, it's this adorable thing.
And then deeper, it's the story of like what happens when women actually reclaim togetherness and power and joy and

Speaker 2 want to to be the center.

Speaker 3 Anyway, and some of these women are retired. And so they're in retirement with their husbands.
And their husbands are like, I want you to be home with me, taking care of me.

Speaker 3 And they're like, I thought we were going to be playing golf. Exactly.
They're like, I've been doing that my whole life. I need to have something for myself.

Speaker 3 And it's this beautiful, like awakening in some of these women that they're finally doing this one thing that brings them alive.

Speaker 2 And then the repercussions of women following their joy together. That's good.
Yeah. And daring to have worlds without considering their partners.

Speaker 2 But also, they wear like unicorn horns and leg warmers.

Speaker 2 And they are on YouTube. They're trying to like figure out how to do their blue shot eyeshadow.
So they're watching like teenagers do their makeup and they're trying to figure it out.

Speaker 2 It's really special.

Speaker 3 Okay.

Speaker 2 I

Speaker 2 have spent my life

Speaker 2 telling difficult truths about who I am as a human.

Speaker 2 And I have talked about

Speaker 2 sex and drugs and rock and roll.

Speaker 2 But there is part of my life that I have not completely always

Speaker 2 been

Speaker 2 honest about. And now's when I'm going to reveal to you that I fucking love reality TV.

Speaker 2 Okay. And I know.

Speaker 2 that you're going to think less of me after you learn. And I just want you to know that's okay with me because I am am not trying to be perfect.

Speaker 3 That doesn't mean you're imperfect.

Speaker 2 Trying to be honest.

Speaker 3 No, I don't think it means you're imperfect. You like what you fucking like.

Speaker 2 Well, remember when I went on Bravo? Remember when I went on the Andy Cohen show? I went on Watch What's Happening Live?

Speaker 2 Because Bronwyn from The Real Housewives was coming out as queer and she needed my support as a housewife does every once in a while.

Speaker 3 Okay.

Speaker 2 And so I go on Andy Cohen's show in support of Bronwyn and Andy Cohen, who made the housewives, who produced the housewives, who is the housewives person, looks at me and says, Why are you here?

Speaker 2 And I said, well, I feel like you invited me here. And he said, no, no, no.
I mean, like, you're an activist, you're a feminist.

Speaker 2 You know, Gloria Steinem recently said that the real housewives is bad for women. Why are you here? On air, he asked me this.

Speaker 2 And I say to him, Andy Cohen, I'm not saying I think the real housewives are good for women. I'm just saying I like it.

Speaker 3 I'm just letting the soft animal of my body love what it loves, Andy Cohen.

Speaker 2 I don't know. It's WWE for women.

Speaker 3 Okay.

Speaker 2 That's what it is.

Speaker 3 It is in more ways than one. Yeah, there's nothing wrong with that.

Speaker 3 It's like going to the bookstore and like seeing that like juicy novel that like you've been wanting, but you're afraid to pick it up because somebody's going to judge you on it.

Speaker 3 Or like looking and finding poetry and walking out. You have to

Speaker 3 consume stuff that makes you like yourself and like the life.

Speaker 2 I remember when I was trying to figure out what exactly lesbian sex was going to be like, so I used to have this book about sex that, and then I'd be on the airplanes and I'd put the book about lesbian sex inside of Jane Eyre and read it.

Speaker 2 That's what, like, what's what I'm saying.

Speaker 3 Same, same. Jane Eyre was just, if she would have been alive a few more generations.

Speaker 2 Totally. She was wishing she could have some lesbian sex by then.

Speaker 3 Right.

Speaker 3 Okay.

Speaker 2 so what we have done is we have charged sister

Speaker 2 with watching

Speaker 2 reality TV. Reality TV, which please understand, since she won't even watch highbrow TV, highbrow TV is too lowbrow for her.
Charging her with watching da-da-da-da, 90-day fiancé.

Speaker 3 The other way.

Speaker 2 I thought maybe it was going to be a bridge too far. 90-day fiancé.

Speaker 2 What

Speaker 2 do you think, sister? First of all, why don't you give our listeners a quick synopsis of what 90 Day Fiancé is about?

Speaker 3 Okay, I watched two episodes of season four, which is the other way,

Speaker 3 which I have been able to surmise contextually from the subtitle that the other way refers to a reverse of the traditional process, which is

Speaker 3 U.S.

Speaker 3 residents

Speaker 3 partnering up with, if we can call it that, it's a stretch, partnering up with folks from other countries to

Speaker 3 get married and then the people from the other countries come to America. The other way is related to in all of the

Speaker 3 couples that we see here, the Americans are going to go live into the other countries. Right.
So that's what's happening there. So the 90-day refers to typically you get a 90-day visa.

Speaker 3 And so

Speaker 3 there is some, shall we say, urgency involved in the consummation of these relationships, or else they will not be together. Right.

Speaker 3 A lot of these people found each other on the internets and or on travel

Speaker 3 to the other lands. They met these people, spent a couple of days with them, came home, and now we meet them when they are about to return to the land.

Speaker 3 And most of them have a wedding date, which is a few days after they land, including some who have never actually met each other in person.

Speaker 3 This is what I spent three hours of my life watching yesterday.

Speaker 3 So,

Speaker 2 what is your take?

Speaker 3 So, in the light most favorable to everyone involved,

Speaker 3 some of them

Speaker 3 are

Speaker 3 irreconcilably batshit crazy.

Speaker 3 Some of them,

Speaker 3 I am

Speaker 3 genuinely

Speaker 3 worried and scared for.

Speaker 3 This is why I can't watch reality TV because I cannot separate myself. I cannot say, oh, it's just TV because Gabriel

Speaker 3 is so worried about Gabriel. I love Gabriel.
I know. Also, I have some observations generally on things, but I think

Speaker 3 as a

Speaker 3 psychological

Speaker 3 observation

Speaker 3 without judging the individual people. Except I will say I'm going to judge you, Danielle, because that

Speaker 3 is not okay what's happening with you and Johann? I mean, it's not okay. Oh, Danielle, Dominican Republic, curly blonde lady.

Speaker 2 She is horrifying.

Speaker 3 Oh, my God. I mean, Johan's not getting any credit himself.
I'm just saying what I have noticed is a few things. First of all,

Speaker 3 how incredibly hard it is to be family

Speaker 3 or loved ones of people and just let them live

Speaker 3 and make their choices, even their

Speaker 3 very, very horrible children, terrible choices.

Speaker 3 And all of the, there's all these like mothers or brothers, that sweet lady

Speaker 3 who is just really not, it's not going, gonna go well for Jennifer, but her sweet brother and her sister-in-law and her mom.

Speaker 3 And then you've got the mom of the Alabama lady who just says, you know, a mother's worry is.

Speaker 3 And they're just letting their people go out and really make terrible decisions. Yeah.

Speaker 3 And I realized it is what reality tv is it's just like a really blown up caricature of what everyone's walking through because we're all gonna watch our kids and our loved ones make foolish choices and we know they are and we just have to let them and that's an untenable position to live through but don't you think it's so fun to watch people make

Speaker 3 wild scenes outrageous i won't even say terrible because we don't know right we don't know what's right but we know abby we do know i mean i just don't i haven't seen the whole show.

Speaker 3 I'm still at the, I'm actually caught up to that season four. I'm sure once you see the whole show, it'll be crystal clear, Abby.

Speaker 3 We'll see you wrapped up with a little bow and everything will be fine. But what it makes me feel is like grateful that other people are showing me that outrageousness is still possible.
Like.

Speaker 2 She's such a romantic.

Speaker 3 She believes so cool. She believes.
But here's what it does for me. It's so funny to me that these people think this is about love.
It's hilarious. Like

Speaker 3 what it's saying to me every time, and the people are saying it with their very words that come out of their mouth, is that

Speaker 3 everyone on this show, what is driving them is that

Speaker 3 they want to go get a certain life. Okay.

Speaker 3 They know what it is. My girl with Johan, she just wants to live at the beach and be out of New York.

Speaker 3 But yet we don't let ourselves go get the life we want unless it has this kind of an excuse of we are pursuing external love.

Speaker 3 What I want to say to Danielle is go fucking live in the Dominican Republic if that's what you want. Why are you bringing Johan into this?

Speaker 3 All he wants to do, which is what he stated, is live in New York. Okay.
So why don't you just go ahead and do that? All Chris wants to do is live for herself for the first time.

Speaker 3 Why is she bringing sweet Jamie into this? I'm really worried about Jamie.

Speaker 3 I just don't understand why people aren't just

Speaker 2 going to get the the life that they want that's a really good point but i feel like gabe and isabel are in love i know we're i know okay that's i know i really hope so i really they're my favorite awesome yes i love your take i've never thought of that just go get the thing don't say it's about love say it's about self-love and go do the thing

Speaker 3 One thing I love about our listeners is how industrious all of you are. The stories we hear about you guys going off on your own and starting your own ventures like we did, it's truly inspiring.

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Speaker 2 i also feel like 90 day fiancé which one of my smartest friends yabba told me.

Speaker 3 I don't know if she's going to let us yeah we'll have to let this fire.

Speaker 3 She's too erudite to admit this part.

Speaker 2 90 Day Fiancé is an anthropological research project.

Speaker 3 Yes.

Speaker 3 It is.

Speaker 2 Because,

Speaker 2 first of all, when you think about

Speaker 2 we are like, oh, that's so crazy what they're doing. Every marriage is a little bit like entering into a different culture, right?

Speaker 2 Except they're doing it literally, and then they are stunned and shocked when the two cultures clash.

Speaker 2 Like, for example, the fashion designer who wants to wear a bare midriff, but then marries an Egyptian Muslim and is shocked by the culture in Egypt.

Speaker 3 Who said, no, no, but he said before they got married, what you will need to do is wear clothing that covers your entire body and that isn't tight.

Speaker 3 And she went to fashion design school and all she wants is to wear vintage 20s clothing. But this is what I mean.
The other thing that it does is it just like puts in

Speaker 3 huge highlight the idea that we are all so scared of talking about the things that we're scared of. Yes.

Speaker 3 And we are all so scared of asking the questions that we don't want the answers to precisely because we already know the

Speaker 2 answers. That's right.

Speaker 3 So they're all like, well, I don't know. Have you talked to him about this?

Speaker 3 Why hasn't he told his family he's engaged to you and going to be married on Tuesday to you? Well,

Speaker 3 I just think.

Speaker 2 It's unclear.

Speaker 3 I just, it's unclear to me. Why haven't you told him that he's not going to go to New York, even though you told him he's going to go to New York?

Speaker 3 Well, I just think we'll probably be able to work it out. I know.
All of us have these things. They're littler than that usually.

Speaker 3 But contrary to all of the evidence, we're just like, if they don't look look in that little corner, they won't come to roost. It's roosting people.

Speaker 3 Isn't that like the whole point of life, though, is to like keep putting yourself in experiences until you learn some of these lessons?

Speaker 3 Like, I know I got re-gifted lessons over and over and over again.

Speaker 3 Lessons, that's so good, babe. Until I actually learned them.
And I kept making the same fucking mistakes over and over again.

Speaker 3 And I feel like these are the kind of things, like, just because this might be an inevitable mistake doesn't mean it's bad for them.

Speaker 3 And also, we have to throw out there that maybe they just want to be on fucking TV.

Speaker 2 Of course. And also, it's just the American propaganda of it, of the whole show is so

Speaker 3 much people wanting to come and live in the U.S.

Speaker 2 All the camera angles are like, we're supposed to like be mad at the culture that they're going to and not the American, but it's like, no,

Speaker 2 I'm always mad at the American.

Speaker 3 Oh, God, I'm not mad at that at all. I'm so glad you didn't make me watch the one where they were coming to America because that's like, I don't even think in good conscience I could talk about that.

Speaker 2 I don't think you're going to be the type of person, sister, who's going to stick with these reality shows. So we're just going to have you pop in and pop out.
Okay.

Speaker 2 I'm not going to take you to the housewives yet.

Speaker 2 Also loves, if, oh, the marvelous Miss Maisel is coming back.

Speaker 3 Oh, God. I love her.

Speaker 3 I actually did watch that show.

Speaker 2 Oh, my God. That's one of our favorite visual experience.
Oh, and also just precious is Daisy Jones and the Six.

Speaker 2 Taylor Jenkins Reed wrote Daisy Jones and the Six, and we're watching that with Tish.

Speaker 2 And it's just, it's just precious. I love it because it reminds me so much of Almost Famous, which is one of my all-time favorite movies.
And Riley Keogh is just fantastic in it.

Speaker 3 And

Speaker 2 I can't get over all of the. swishy, swishy, swishy Fleetwood Mackie outfits.

Speaker 3 Oh, the outfits are so good. I just love any show that has like musicians and like the backstage and how the whole rock star world is.
I love those shows.

Speaker 2 I know it makes me feel cool.

Speaker 3 Check it out.

Speaker 2 And next time we'll talk about all of your zombie shows. Okay.
I'm so sorry we didn't get to that.

Speaker 3 I have some reality shows to offer to people. Oh, yeah.
Watch.

Speaker 3 Yeah. I would like to ask people to check out the new reality show called Senator Michaela Kavanaugh's Seven Week Filibuster in the Nebraska State

Speaker 3 Senate.

Speaker 3 It is fascinating. I just don't understand why we need other reality TV when we have things as exciting as that.
My girl, Michaela, has for seven

Speaker 3 lifelong weeks stood there filibustering, not letting the Nebraska legislature pass any bill because she is opposing the bill that would take away gender-affirming care in her state. Seven weeks.

Speaker 3 She has strep throat. She's been standing up there.
She's just been talking, talking about her favorite salads, talking about everything just to keep the state senate.

Speaker 3 And she said, if this legislator decides that legislating hate against children is our priority, then I'm going to make it painful, painful for everyone. And she said, I will burn this to the ground.

Speaker 3 And she's not stopping. Also, she is a Catholic and she says that it's her Lenten penance and she is doing God's work by standing up there and doing that every day.

Speaker 3 How much longer will she have to do that?

Speaker 3 Well, they break for session in June. Oh my gosh.
So we'll see.

Speaker 2 It's going to be like 90-day fiancé, but 90-day congressperson.

Speaker 3 Yeah. I mean, she's total badass.

Speaker 2 Now, if we could just have that reality show, so she could be filibustering and then we could have like a little confessional where she's talking about how she feels about filibustering and then she could go back.

Speaker 2 It could be so good.

Speaker 3 Also, on the podcast recommendation on the issues with Michelle Goodwin. Brilliant.
People should check that out. It's 15 Minutes of Feminism in little chunks.

Speaker 3 It completely contextualizes it in terms of current conversations, but it's from a historical political context. You don't need to know anything about history of feminism.

Speaker 3 She really situates what's happening right now within

Speaker 3 historical framework. It's brilliant.

Speaker 3 Kids podcasts, American History Storytellers. It's a one read plus podcast, and it's basically American history, but.
accurately.

Speaker 3 And they do like all these four-part series on, you know, how Hawaii became enlisted to be a state, women's suffrage, Tulsa Race Massacre, all the stuff where your kids can actually get the real history.

Speaker 3 Awesome. Cool.
Okay.

Speaker 2 You all, I hope you have some good options here. Choices.
What are we supposed to watch tonight? What are we supposed to listen to today? You've got some choices. We mentioned lessons in chemistry.

Speaker 2 I also just finished, I have some questions for you by Rebecca Mackay.

Speaker 3 So Philippin' good.

Speaker 2 All right. We love you.

Speaker 2 Tell us what you're watching.

Speaker 3 Can we start a We Can Do Hard Things pod squad, TV, book?

Speaker 2 Wouldn't that be great so that we can always know what's next and we don't have to stare at each other? All right, tell us what to watch. We love you.

Speaker 3 And what to listen to.

Speaker 2 And what to listen to.

Speaker 3 Yeah. Yeah.
Okay. Besides Taylor, we got nothing else.
Taylor and Brandy, that's the whole playlist, folks. Indigo girls.
Bye.

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