Laos w/ Wonton Don | You Be Trippin' with Ari Shaffir

1h 11m
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On this episode of You Be Trippin, Wonton Don accidentally takes meth and lights his pillow on fire in Laos, where he loses his camera and gets pranked by a bar owner. On the show, he and Ari discuss the local drugs, partying Australians, and drowning tourists in the river that runs through Vang Vieng. They also talk about crab rangoon, coming down, teaching in China, and military groups that were high on substances. We also get a pretty great travel tip. Tham keo!

You Be Trippin' Ep. 43

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Transcript

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I've only been to Columbia.

That's as far south as I've gone.

Really?

Yeah.

Yeah, it's weird that people that go to Asia don't go to South America.

They're the two cheap areas.

I would like to go.

I would like to explore more of South America.

I went to Columbia over COVID because it was one of the few countries you could travel to.

It was on our list for that reason.

We narrowed it down to where we can get banded in.

Oh, okay.

And who would take Americans?

And also, who was good on COVID or not terrible on COVID?

So Brazil was out.

We're like, this is

a mess there.

But a lot of people were as good at us or bad.

We weren't that great on it, you know, with numbers-wise, for who knows reasons.

But, like, so anyway, so Colombia, Costa Rica, Ecuador, trying to think what else.

Malta.

Croatia, I think maybe it was allowing people.

There were some that were like, you can work remotely here.

They had those digital nomad laws.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But then I was like, I don't want to be in fucking Prague in the winter.

You know, I was like, let's go someplace warm.

Yeah.

So we just narrowed it down.

But yeah, Ecuador was fucking rules.

Here's the cool thing about there

versus Asia.

Every country talks the same.

You switch borders and you're still talking the same language.

Yeah.

Versus going from Laos to Thailand.

Can you speak Spanish fluently?

Better.

No, I can get by, though, for food and shit, food and a place to stay.

Okay.

I can definitely get by.

I can use the wrong word to have the right meaning.

Yeah.

You know, do you have bed?

Yeah.

Yeah.

You have rooms open.

It's like, they'll get it, you know?

Yeah, I think I know like survival Chinese and then survival Spanish.

What do you speak, Mandarin or

Mandarin?

Yeah, but I don't like my Mandarin is not good, but I just know survival.

Like you could drop me in the middle of China and I could like

at least find a hotel.

Damn, that's great.

Yeah.

That's what you need.

That's like the first level.

That's all you need.

How can I get by here?

Can I live?

Yeah.

Not live, but like exist, you know?

Yeah, because I arrived not knowing how to speak a single word.

Why'd you get there?

Except for New How.

So I graduated from college and really had no idea what I wanted to do.

And my friend went abroad to Shanghai and he loved it so much that he just didn't go back to college.

He just dropped out of college and was like, yeah, you know what?

I'm going to stay in Shanghai.

Wow, really?

So he was a year below me, but I was graduating.

And I like, I've always loved traveling.

So he was like, dude, you should just, you can get a teaching job out in China very easily.

You should just move out here for a year and then you can use your vacations and holidays to travel around Asia.

So I was like, that sounds great.

And I didn't know a word of Chinese.

So I was like, all right, I'll go out.

And I applied for a couple of teaching jobs.

I got them.

They'll really take anyone.

And I just told the the school, I was like, all right, I'll move to China, but I want to be living with another foreign teacher and just be like living in the city, like somewhere downtown.

And then when I arrived, I was like living in the burbs of Guangzhou my first year

and living alone.

Whoa.

Yeah.

That's lonely.

That was lonely.

I remember I checked into my apartment in China.

They had like

a framed photo of Lizzie Maguire on the bedside table.

I don't know why.

Maybe they thought that would be comforting.

It was kind of comforting, to be honest.

But yeah, so my first two weeks, I was like, all right, I'm going to quit and come home.

This sucks.

But on Halloween, because I lived so far out, the buses would stop running at like

10 at night and start back up at 6 in the morning.

So I was like, all right, I'm just going to stay out and party all night.

And that night, I met some people from Liverpool who had been there for a bit, and they kind of took me under their wing.

I met all their friends and ended up having a blast.

And then just every weekend, I would stay with them.

And yeah, we became close friends.

And so I stayed that year.

You know how you watch football at all?

A little bit.

Okay, so you know how like a receiver will catch the ball and he has to stay.

Oh, okay.

In fact, you're talking about dancing.

Yes.

Yeah.

No, yeah.

American football.

Yes.

And they're kind of dancing in bounds and trying to get to that first down or the touchdown.

Yeah.

And they're kind of leaned out over, out of bounds.

Their feet are just staying in.

And if they can get past the first down, it's first down.

But if they don't, well, that was fourth turnover.

Yes.

I feel like that's like when you go to a crazy foreign place.

You're like, if I could just make a friend before I book my flight home,

stay for a year.

Yes.

And it's like, it's so close to like, I can't, I know, I'm not meeting anybody.

I'm out.

And it sounds like if they were just better buses, you'd be out of there.

Yeah, probably.

And I mean, and how I met these guys is absurd.

I was, um,

I, so I, there was one other person teaching kind of near me.

And so we were playing a game at a bar where we're at this Irish pub in Guangzhou, China.

And so there's a lot of foreigners from all over the world.

And we're just trying to guess where they're from.

And then we walk up and ask them.

And then if I'm right, like my friend has to buy me a beer.

If I'm wrong, I have to buy him a beer.

We kind of like turn it into a game.

And I guessed that this larger Liverpudlian lad was

British.

I think I get, wait.

No, I thought he was from the US because he was kind of like fat and bald.

I just maybe assumed that.

Sounds right.

And then he was like, no, mate, I'm from Liverpool.

And

I was like, oh, you're British.

And he was like, I'm not British.

I'm a scousa.

Because people from Liverpool just hate England for some reason.

And then I was like, oh, cool.

And then he was like, I think the second thing he asked me was like, by the way, mate, do you like drugs?

And I was like, yeah, I mean, sure.

And then just hands me a bag of white powder.

What?

And then I was like, all right, I guess I'll try some.

I assumed it was Coke, but after doing it, I could tell

it was not cocaine.

What was it?

It was meow meow.

No, that's meow meow.

I was about to change the subject to ask you, what the fuck you meant by that.

What's meow meow?

I think like Chinese factories like changed, they found a loophole where if you changed a couple bonds in MDMA, it was legal for a bit.

And so these factories would just make it until China would close the loophole.

I think it's pretty much probably what they were selling in the U.S.

as bath salts.

It was sold in the UK as like plant food, but that was just,

they would just say it's that so they could export it abroad.

It ended up being a lot of fun, honestly.

But that could go very wrong, too, if you get the wrong batch of some like weird Chinese factory drug.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

But yeah, I got lucky and like this guy in Liverpool was just, he was the headmaster at a school in China, but then on the weekends was like just slanging this stuff all over the city.

He's white.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Okay.

Yeah, he was white.

Damn.

I assume you asked that because I think like China's known for the Nigerians are usually the drug dealers.

It's funny in Asia and almost anywhere, though.

Also like Europe, it's like, how do you find weed?

How do you find hash?

One or the other.

And it's like, just look for the fucking black, black guy.

like the dark black, the Nigerians.

And then

they're cool, but that's who's especially in China.

Like, they're stick out.

It's always Nigeria.

Like, because I've met people from all over Africa when I was in China.

And if they weren't from Nigeria, they weren't selling drugs.

But the moment you met an African from Nigeria, there's a good chance they would eventually try to sell you drugs.

It's the least racist thing you could do.

It's not about the African continent.

It's about Nigeria.

Yes, it's just about that one country.

And because at one point I had this Nigerian friend, and like we were hanging out for two weeks, I'm like, oh my God, this is the first Nigerian guy who's not dealing drugs.

And then after the second week, he eventually tried to sell me drugs.

And I was like, oh, okay.

Oh, yeah.

Just building up to it.

Yes.

Wait, hold on.

Okay.

I didn't even start this podcast correctly.

I got to introduce you to the shit.

Okay.

That'll all be in, I guess.

Hi, everybody.

Welcome to UB Trippin'.

It's the only podcast that tests for and makes sure there is no fecal matter in this broadcast.

Today's guest is the son

of Beef Wanton and Don Borey.

Please welcome the Wanton

Don.

Hey, how are you?

Yeah.

Happy to be here.

It's a slash, right?

Your first name is thee and your last name is Wonton slash Don?

Yeah, or you can just do first name Wanton, last name Don.

Oh, I thought first name was thee.

And then like your mom and dad.

Yeah, well, I can like, you can, I'm not like the Ohio State University.

Like, you can call me Wanton Don.

Oh, you're.

I just call you Wanton.

Yes.

Okay.

Yep.

Is your name Don?

No, it's not.

You're just the Don of Wantons.

I'm just the Don of Wontons.

I make a mean Crab Rangoon if you're a fan.

Disgusting.

It's got cream cheese.

Are you kosher?

No, but I don't like cream cheese.

You don't like cream cheese?

Not that much.

Okay.

I mean, I think it's my favorite food.

I've had it in Yangon.

I've kind of insulted.

What?

I was like, I'm here in Yangon.

I should try Crab Rangoon.

Wait, they actually sell them in Yangon?

Yeah.

Really?

Yeah.

Okay, because it was invented in the U.S.

So, like, interesting.

Yeah, so like it really has no connection to Burma.

It was just

a cool sounding name.

But yeah, that would, because I've always wondered that.

That's like the one reason I've wanted to go to Yangon, which used to be called Rangoon, to see if I could, if I, because I was like, if they don't, I want to like open up a Rangoon shop in Rangoon.

But you, you were able to find some there?

Yeah, and I was like, I may as well get some.

Okay.

But it might have been Chinatown

and it might have been, it might have just been the American part of town where they're like, you'll probably want this yeah I don't I don't remember I definitely found I was like well I'm here I should try it and I'm like oh cream cheese yeah because I mean in China you can't find a crab rangoon

in New York I will say New York has really bad crab rangoons maybe that's why you don't like them no but I only had it in no in rangoon in rangoon

that is hilarious you can find them there

yeah

it's just like whenever I get a bagel I'm like make it light on the cream cheese and they go sweet a lot of light cream cheese and you're like no stop it's fucking you squeezy all pours out yeah i don't like a bagel over stuffed with cream cheese

for some reason cream cheese and fake crab works yeah right right right yeah and that's the that's the fake crab it's the what's that sushi with the fake crab i don't know the japanese name for it i just call them crab sticks or whatever but no there's a crab sushi where it's just it's fake crab meat california roll california roll yeah and that's got cream cheese in it too right no that's a philly roll that's a philly roll yeah

yeah Okay, hey, everybody, oh, Shafira.

I just want to break in real quick to tell you a little bit about the guest.

Wanton Don is a traveler, he's a traveling psychonaut.

That's what he calls himself.

He's great, you should follow all his stuff.

He legitimately gets out there, he makes me jealous of what he does.

He'll be on.

We have a few people on this podcast that are going to be on numerous times, and Don is one.

Don, if you're listening to this from wherever you are, please, every time you're in New York, come back.

Let's get an episode in the can.

Let's upload it.

You can check him out on Hold On.

I've got it all.

I've got it all right here.

TikTok is The Wanton Dawn.

YouTube is Donnie Does.

Forget Facebook.

He's on Barstool Sports a lot.

And Instagram, The Wanton Dawn.

Check out all his information there.

For myself, I got the Farewell Tour coming right now.

Oops, I'm not talking to the mic.

I got the farewell tour coming.

I got shows in, well, Austin sold out.

I got

Reno, excuse me, Tahoe, Nevada.

Oh, fuck.

You ready to go back, Ben?

Let's go back.

Tahoe, Nevada.

Whoa, all tickets are always your fear.com.

It's a farewell tour.

If I mention one of your cities, I will be there, and I will probably not be there again until 2029, except for Austin and Denver.

Austin, December 13th, sold out.

December 21st, Tahoe.

Pitts, the next year.

We got Pittsburgh,

Providence, Salt Lake City, Brea.

Adrian Appalucci will be with me in Pittsburgh and Providence.

Salt Lake, I said, Brea, Nashville.

Adrian will be with me on that.

San Antonio, we're in February now.

San Antonio, Tampa.

Denver is the greatest hit show.

And then Schaumburg, Illinois, Adrian will be with me to that.

Also, Atlanta at the Tabernacle.

Portland at the theater.

San Jose, we're in March now.

Orlando, Fort Lauderdale, Seattle.

Oh,

theaters, big theaters.

Seattle, Vancouver, Calgary, Edmonton.

And and wrapping up in

june 18th in anchorage alaska and then no more touring for me till 2027 and if i'm mentioning one of those cities i'm not gonna be there till probably i mean minimum 2028 probably 2029 so a lot of these guys where's the lighting better

whoa that's fucking freaky where's bandit

hey buddy So get tickets right now at rhythm.com and my new special, America's Sweetheart, coming to Netflix

January 14th.

That's right, guys.

America's Sweetheart.

It's all about positivity and focusing on the good parts of life.

Like this podcast.

Yeah, if you can get a fucking great travel podcast from one of the most well-known edge lords in the world, what else positive can you find in negative things?

Yeah, a guy who's like, you're telling me you're taking a guy who takes his

balls out and dick out on stage who fucking traumatizes children at Madison Square Garden by having his balls out in front of oh, that was the forum by having his dick and balls out and kind of rubbing them a little bit at the forum, the place where Kobe Bryant played.

What?

He pulled his dick out of a Kobe Bryant jersey for that?

That's not cool.

I'll never get anything positive out of that.

No, there's a travel podcast, and my new special is all about that kind of vibe.

America, Sweetheart, January 14th only on Netflix.

You pooping, buddy?

Let's get back to the episode.

Also, subscribe.

Don't forget to subscribe.

YouTube, Spotify, wherever you're listening.

I love this thing.

Join Join in forever.

Bye.

Don, where are we going today?

What are you going to tell me about?

What did we decide on?

Well, we're going to touch on the story in Laos, which I think was my most absurd travel story.

Okay, Laos is great.

I have had someone else go there, which is fine.

We're going to repeat stuff.

He spent most of his time in a hospital.

Okay.

I surprisingly never ended up in a hospital.

I probably should have gone to a hospital.

When'd you go?

Where was it?

When'd you go?

Why?

So, yeah.

I already sort of explained how I ended up in China.

We can throw that part in here yeah um you already heard it yeah so part of the reason of going out to china for a year is that on my holidays and vacations i can just travel to the other countries in southeast asia which i had heard great things about cheap flights too right yeah very cheap flight like dragon air and shit it's just like yeah they have

spring airlines it's like their kind of spirit airlines yeah um

so I had heard about this place in Laos.

It's called Veng Vien.

I've heard of it.

I never got there.

I I got sidetracked.

I got into Buddhism for a minute, so I was like, let me try to go to a monastery instead of heading over there and then ran out of time.

Yeah, well, the whole thing about Vang Vienne is there's this river that runs near the town and they have

to rent a tube, float down the river, and then along it, they have all these bars that have like rope swings, slides, trampolines,

and then they also like sell shrooms at all these spots.

Buddy, I was just in Yosemite doing shrooms, floating on a river on a blow-up paddleboard.

There's something, because I floated a few times, but on booze and weed.

There's something to like letting the river, especially when it's not moving fast, just very slowly, and then you hit like a branch or something, and it kind of turns you, and you're just leaning back, and so then it just changes what you're looking at, and then you see half dome suddenly, and you're on boomers, and you're just like, wow.

And there's not like, all right, move on.

You're already moving.

Yeah, you're, it's.

And if you got to catch up, it's three paddles and you're there.

Nothing better than

that.

God, God, I got to go there now.

They sell mushrooms.

Yeah, yeah.

They'll sell shroom shakes.

And I looked behind the bar to see how they make them.

It's pretty much just a bunch of iced bananas and then like a couple scoops of shrooms.

Just like grind them up?

Yeah, then they throw it in a blender.

Yeah, so that was.

How much are those?

This was a long time ago, but they weren't that expensive.

They weren't like restrictive.

Yeah, they were probably like $10.

Yeah.

I heard in Thailand, there was always like these hippies would go to like, you know, there's mushroom sanctuaries or whatever, the humane ones and the inhumane ones, and all those hippies would go after hours and like pick shrooms off.

Yes.

And they're like, I don't know what they're doing.

They're just going to the fucking shit fields.

Who cares?

And then they realized what they were doing.

And they're like, oh, no, we're selling those.

Get out of here.

It was like Shake for Weed, where they're like, you can use it.

And then they're like, oh, there's money in this.

Oh, a lot of money.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And I think in Thailand, if you go to any of the islands off the coast, you can usually find a stand selling shroom shakes there too.

Vangvien's Wild, though, like the first restaurant I went in there, they also were selling joints of opium.

Like you could buy weed pizzas, like shroom pizzas.

Openly.

Yeah.

How'd they get away with it?

Pay the cops?

Or just.

Yeah, maybe like that, that brings in so much tourism money that they can just pay off the cops.

There was one place in Cambodia on an island I went to and one place in like Pai I went to.

Ah, yes.

And it was like...

I went to the place in Pai you're probably thinking of.

Yeah, and they're like, we pay the cops.

Yeah.

And they're like,

because we pay them, they don't allow anyone else to do do it.

Everyone knows we're the ones with the whatever.

I'm like, how do you sell joints on a beach in Thailand?

Somebody's like, we're friends with the cops.

We'd pay them and then we're allowed.

It's not that big a deal.

Thailand, though, a couple years ago, I think they legalized weed.

Finally, because I was like hearing about friends that used to get caught smoking weed on the beach and the cops would be like, you need to pay us $4,000 or you're going to jail for 10 years.

So you think they would have to find that money somehow.

You can't call their buff on that.

But yeah, no, I think the last time I checked, weed was

once I'm like, sure, like, I'm a cop.

I'm arresting you.

I saw you do it.

Like, oh, motherfucker.

They were like, don't smoke with anyone you don't know.

But then I talked to Thai people, and they're like, we smoke all the time outside.

Yeah.

Yeah.

They're probably more trying to bust the tourists at that point because they know shakedowns.

Yeah, they can get a lot of bribe money.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So when I first arrived, I immediately realized that I had lost my camera.

And this was before I had a smartphone because this was maybe

2010.

Yeah.

Nice.

We're recording.

Nice.

Yeah, yeah.

I'm just DIY, so I fuck it up constantly.

So, yeah, go ahead.

Yes.

You lost your smartphone?

No, I lost my camera because this was before I had a smartphone.

So that camera was like how I was going to document the whole trip.

So I was a little upset, but I was like, whatever.

We're going to go to the river and do a bunch of shrooms.

You make me want to smoke a joint right now.

Go ahead.

And it was awesome, you know?

Like, as you said, just floating down the river.

And then you would go off a rope swing, a slide.

You could also get a bucket of booze.

But then at one point, they had a trampoline that was in the river and it had one of those black safety nets that goes all the way around it.

So you can't jump from the trampoline into the river.

But this is when the shrooms were really hitting.

And I was like, you know what?

I'm going to free willy it, get up really high and jump over the safety net and then dive into the river.

So I jump, I only just barely clear the safety net and then just flop immediately down face first into the river.

I didn't realize the river was like three feet deep or something.

And I just nailed the rocks off.

I could have easily broke my neck, but I think it kind of like deflected off my forehead and then mainly hit my back.

People drown there every week.

Yeah, no, for sure.

From what I've heard from Colin told me too.

It's like, it's like constantly like, hey, take it easy today.

I don't want to tell you why.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

No, actually, I'll get to that later because I think they eventually had to close the whole place down for a bit.

So, yeah, I get up and I'm like super banged up, kind of bleeding from the head and the back.

And I walk up to one of the bars and I'm like, do you guys have anything that could help me?

And they just hand me a plastic cup of whiskey.

What?

Yeah, that's all.

That was the help.

Yeah, that was the help.

So, like,

what an old West fucking remedy.

I know.

So, I drink this and bike.

I sit on a bench and like I start sipping the whiskey and I'm looking around.

And at one point I was like, you know what?

Maybe I died back there because

this is paradise.

Like I'm looking around.

Everyone's having a beautiful time.

There's beautiful like karst limestone mountains around you.

And I was like, did I die?

Because like this seems like heaven.

Eventually doze off.

which is dangerous if you've had a concussion.

I don't know if I had a concussion.

And then when I wake up, most people have left and I'm just surrounded by chickens like walking around.

And so I was like, all right, I got to get back into town.

So I head into town and I think.

In Vang Vienne?

Yeah, I head into downtown Vang Vienne.

I find the friend that I'm there with and we go out to eat and we kind of regroup.

The shrooms aren't really hitting anymore.

And that's when a guy walks up to our table and he was like, do you guys want some Yaba?

You want some Yaba?

And I had never heard the word Yaba before, and I was intrigued.

Like, I'm the type of guy who will try everything once.

Anal?

Yes.

Okay.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And so I'm like,

Yaba sounds exotic.

It sounds cool.

I'll just read it.

I'll get to it.

Okay, sorry.

So

he brings over these two like purple pills, and they look like homemade pills, something like that.

And I was like,

all right, let's go I take the pill and then like a half hour later my heart starts beating really fast and I start getting really jacked up and I'm like let's go hit the bars like let's go rage

and so I get up I walk out of the restaurant and I'm walking really fast I get like three blocks away from the restaurant I turn around my friend's gone I later learned out that my friend got up and just had fainted had like fainted in the restaurant like all the staff came over to help him um That was the last I saw of him for like 36 hours.

What?

Because at that point, I was like, oh, shit, where'd he go?

And I looked for a bit.

I couldn't find him.

I kept on walking.

So, yeah, I'm still like super amped up.

I go to a few bars and

I'm just moving around constantly.

I'm sort of chewing my cheeks.

And then I asked this Australian bro there and I'm like, hey, I just took something called Yabba.

Have you ever heard of that?

And he's like, oh, mate, that's just another word for meth.

Oh, damn it.

And so, yeah, it was just

straight up crystal meth.

Oh, my God.

Laotian crystal meth.

Yes.

Laotian crystal meth.

So, I don't know.

Have you ever tried Adderall before?

Yeah.

It was kind of like if I had taken 20 Adderalls.

Damn.

20 pills of Adderall.

Like, you're just fucking so jacked up.

The problem with Adderall is you take it like, all right, I got to write this story.

I got to like sit and write and concentrate.

Yes.

And then, um, or or like, I gotta clean my apartment, I gotta sweep and do everything.

I'm too unfocused, I'll just focus, and then you're but you're so focused, you're like, well, let me rearrange, let me take everything off the closets, let me take all this out, repack, refold, and then you're like, you still haven't cleaned anything.

By the time it wears off, five, six hours later, everything's a mess.

Yeah,

I'll use it sometimes for video editing.

It can be very helpful if you have to just like focus on a test.

I'm gonna tell you my drug I invented.

I'd like to invent.

If there's any scientists out there, please run with this.

It's called Tardol.

It makes you temporarily Autistic.

So you can concentrate.

You can do your work.

You don't need any social functions.

You don't need to be able to talk

at the right level around women or stuff.

You're just focused on your homework or fucking counting jelly beans.

That sounds a lot like Adderall, to be honest, because I'm not very social whenever I take that and probably can't talk to women on it.

But I like that idea.

Okay, thanks.

Yeah, so I'm just like, I'm going from bar bar to bar um at some point i lose my flip-flops but when you're like on meth you don't feel pain so i'm just like i'm walking on these gravel roads for the whole night not feeling any sort of pain it's coming though oh yeah it's it's coming it's coming um and i end up not being able to find our guest house and it like vain bien is not a large town where were you staying what kind of place It was just, it wasn't like a hostel where you had dorm beds.

We did have our own room.

I i think me and my friend had like one room with two beds in it okay um i guess that means behind someone else's house yeah it's kind of just like a small hotel okay like a really shitty bnb yes right yeah exactly but i like first but my friend had the key that had the address on it and it's just i couldn't figure out where i was staying oh that sucks um so i'm out like all night eventually This is like the next day.

I'm like, all right, I should try to lie down.

The next day, you've just been up the whole time.

Yeah, and like, still have, still, I'm like, have, I'm still wired from this wow.

I mean, the problem is with Molly, sometimes it's like, sometimes, like, oh, the percentage of speed is too high.

And then I'm like, no, I know I cannot fall asleep at 6 a.m.

I can't fall asleep until 6 p.m.

Yeah.

And you're like, damn, but you just took straight that ingredient.

Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Nothing to like cut it with or ease the effects.

Yeah, so I still have no interest in sleeping, but I'm like, I at least need a room for a little bit.

So I just book another guest house.

I get into it.

I remember I smoke a SI and then I try to lie down and sleep for a little bit.

When I wake up, the SIG has somehow lit my pillow on fire.

And so there's just like smoke everywhere.

So I'm like, oh, shit.

I take the pillow.

I dunk it in the toilet.

I dunk it in the toilet for like 20 seconds.

I take it out.

It's still on fire.

I dunk it for like a minute.

I take it out.

It's still on fire.

What?

So I just leave it in the toilet bowl and leave the hotel.

I'm at because I'm like, all right, I've already lost my security deposit.

I at least made sure the whole place wasn't going to burn down.

Fair.

Fair.

You did the right thing.

Yeah.

So I leave the place and I'm still like wanting, I'm still wandering around for like what time of day.

That was probably seven the following morning.

Wow.

He just gave you the album or you bought it.

I bought it.

It was dirt cheap, though.

Wow.

Yeah.

so i'm back on the streets probably wander around listening to music for another eight hours i swear that at some point a like a bar owner tried to prank me because when you're on meth you're also he he pulled a prank on me i swear this happened i was at a bar and when you're on meth you get like super paranoid i swear a bar owner brought me a a phone at some point and was like oh excuse me sir Your mom's on the phone.

And like, I had a straight up panic attack.

But then I got on the phone like hello hello and no one was there i think he was just trying to fuck with me he was probably like oh this guy's clearly on yabba probably it has to be super apparent

he's seen it yeah

he's probably seen someone else like like this yeah i know what that i know what that is chewing their cheeks yeah tripley pointed out to me one time sam tripley were at um i think brea improv and somebody wouldn't was getting kicked out and they wouldn't leave And then eventually it was like, all right, we'll call the cops.

Like, you're, you're, you're out of here, but you're not out of here.

So the cops were coming.

Maybe there's a fight, I forget what it doesn't matter.

But all the waitresses were around the cops, and one of them was clenching her cheek.

And Sam was like, It's coke, and I'm like, Because I didn't really know what it looked like on people.

Oh, yeah, I was like, How you know?

I was like, Look at her cheeks, it was clenched, clench, yeah, clench, clench.

Also, if you're like moving your jaw back and forth,

yeah, she's trying to be cool, and it's almost like, get out of the cops area, yeah, don't try to prove your innocence, just don't be around.

Yep, anyway.

Um, so eventually, I went to one of these bars they have there, which are pretty cool.

There are all these lounge chairs and pillows.

Yeah.

And then they have TVs with all these old school VHSs.

And you can just like put in a movie, chill, watch it.

So like I smoked some weed.

I remember putting in Batman Forever and I just like chilled and watched the movie.

Wait, on a little screen or on the big screen?

Yeah, it's not a large TV.

It's right in front of you.

Yeah.

Like an internet cafe, but for...

Oh, no, it's not right.

Like you, there's like all these pillows on the ground.

So if like some other people want to join you

watch the movie.

Yeah, it was a very chill vibe.

And while watching batman forever my friend like walked into that same bar and so i i finally found him and we were able to when did he get the guesthouse he was like yeah the moment the last time i saw you we both got up to leave the restaurant and he just fainted and like all the staff came and brought him some water and he started to feel better after like an hour and just went back to the guesthouse and then he was like i was wondering where you were but i don't like i don't know i don't know maybe got lucky i couldn't track you down hi guys today's episode of you be Tripping is brought to you by Public Rec.

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And so finally, we go back to the guesthouse.

And yeah, after maybe 36 hours, I managed to fall asleep.

And this is when I start like the Yaba starts finally wearing off.

It's a great feeling when fucking

speedy stuff starts to leave you.

No, this was a a horrible feeling.

Because when you're on the Yaba, you couldn't feel pain.

And then when I finally start to sober up, I realized that

the bottoms of my feet are like shredded.

I had cuts all over my feet and I chewed my cheeks so much that I had cuts like all on my cheeks.

You were

John McClain?

What's his name?

John McClain's the guy from Die Hard.

Yeah, we had to run over the glass.

Oh, yes, yes, yes.

So then for like the next four days, I couldn't eat solid foods and I could like barely walk.

From meth.

Just from meth.

And it seemed.

Tell me about Laos.

The meth is out of control.

Yeah.

I thought like Yabba sounded kind of like

weed.

Yeah, it sounds like something that

might be weed.

And so,

yeah, no, so that's

the Nazis used to take meth before going to battle, and that now makes perfect sense.

Yeah, because like when you were on it, I felt no pain, and you need zero sleep, and you don't need food.

Yeah, you can fight for two straight days.

You're like, all right, let's relieve me.

Yeah, and I think actually, like, you ever see Hitler at like the Olympics on

so funny.

Yep.

Put that in.

He's just like, just like, let's go.

Yeah, I have to say, how's this black guy running?

Yeah.

That's what I looked like.

Wow.

Oh, yeah.

A bartender would be like, let me fuck with this guy.

Yeah.

But, I mean, if I ever, like, had to go to war, hopefully I don't, I would probably want to be taking a little meth.

God damn.

And I think that's what the militant groups in the Middle East, like

ISIS and stuff, I think they were also taking that there's like a there's like a pill called Captagon that's the most popular drug in the Middle East and that is pretty much just meth.

And I think a lot of them take that.

Really?

Yeah.

Just to fight her.

You know, the

Vikings would take those

blue meanies or those.

I've heard about that.

Yeah.

And it was like, you get your arm cut off, and you're like, fuck, that hurt, but okay, let's keep going.

Yeah, they would go into full berserker mode.

Berserker, yeah.

The berserker mushroom.

That's what it is.

The berserker troop.

They would work themselves up into a frenzy and then go to people like, these guys are nuts.

Yeah.

Being sober in war would be rough.

I feel like you at least need a few drinks in you.

It seems though, it's like, yeah, the berserker shroom, but I'd hate if I was like the general of the army world.

So I'll take these berserkers and then I'll start going like, like this.

It's like not the best.

Yeah, shrooms would not be my drug of choice for combat.

Yeah, I'm sure they tested it.

Yeah, so like the next five days were sort of ruined, but I ended up, I think from there, we went to Cambodia and then Thailand for a bit.

Just one big trip.

Yeah, we did like a little loop around there.

That's about the, that's the path.

Yeah, that's what like.

Thailand and Cambodia.

Yeah, I mean, that's actually, I ran out of time.

I was in Thailand in the north.

Yeah.

And I was going to go up there and take the river

from, hold on, Chiang Rai is up near there.

Yeah.

And then I was like, I was like, Chiang Mai.

Chiang Mai is over here, and then Chiang Rai is over by the border.

Okay.

And then...

But then I ran out.

But it was supposed to be Laos and then Cambodia.

And then instead, I just jumped to Cambodia.

But it's the same people everywhere at the hostels and shit.

Yeah.

And then, I mean, if you're like really on a budget, you can get a hostel room for like nine dollars if you want that.

It's crazy, yeah, it's crazy how affordable it is, even cheaper sometimes if you want to go like

the lower version of that, which I'm like, it's already fucking low.

And then, if you pay 50 bucks in Thailand, you can stay at like a nice resort with a beautiful pool on the beach.

Was Laos like that?

Uh, yeah, I'm sure Laos was like that back then because, like, Laos was probably even cheaper than Thailand at the time.

I think so, because Thailand's set up kind of for tourism, and Laos and Cambodia like somewhat, but not like Thailand.

Yeah.

And then did you go to Yangon on that same trip?

Yeah, I started in Yangon.

Okay.

So I just, I just looked for like, I took, got all my visas I needed.

Like Thailand's on arrival, so I didn't need it.

Vietnam was ahead of time.

And they give you like, in the next six months, you got one month.

Okay.

So I was like, okay, I don't know about Cambodia or Myanmar, whatever.

I went to some like consulates here.

But then I just waited till like two days before and I looked for who has the best weather for the next 10 days.

Nice.

And so it was Myanmar.

You went to Myanmar at the perfect time because there was a window.

Like for a while, they were like, it's too dangerous to go.

Then they opened up to tourism.

And then I think it's like recently gotten pretty dangerous again and they're not recommending people go.

That's why they changed their name from Yangon, from Rangoon to Yangon and from Myanmar to Burma to Myanmar.

Yeah.

You know that?

Yeah, because the military dictatorship sort of thing.

Yeah, it was like this in bad press.

Let's just not be Burma.

Yeah.

We're not Burma.

I don't know what you're talking about.

And they also like, yeah, they didn't want to be still related to the British because I think

the British were the ones who probably named it Rangon when its actual name was Yangon, but they were like, oh, we can't went back.

Because they, like, the British changed names everywhere.

Like, Beijing used to be Peking.

Guang.

That's why Peking Duck.

Yep.

And Peking ravioli.

Have you ever had those?

Uh-uh.

That's, I think that's only a Massachusetts thing, but that's what they call dumplings.

Oh, wow.

Peking ravioli.

So, what was the food like in Laos?

Like, what kind of food do they they have?

I was not eating a lot.

Wow.

This was like in 2010.

So I don't recall.

I was just out of college.

This was like.

Yeah.

So I honestly couldn't tell you much about Laotian food.

I can tell you a lot about Thai food.

Thai food's

the next episode.

Yeah, yeah.

Would you meet any of the people?

Who'd you meet generally?

I would guess like foreigners.

Yes.

yeah foreigners one island i went to i went to like kochang in thailand that had a lot of russians there okay

oh and laos a lot of australians nice yeah and then

they're so fun yeah

they are a lot of fun they they can drink they can drink and pretty much i feel like a southeast asia loop is like a rite of passage for australians well it's cheap to go from there to there that's the closest place it's a very short Bali, start in Bali or Thailand, but Bali's right there.

So that's the majority of the people you meet.

I remember I met this one Canadian guy, but he sounded American.

And I was like, oh, are you from the U.S.?

And he got very offended.

It's like,

I know.

It's like, relax.

Oh, you don't think you sound like you're from the place right next to you?

Yeah.

But so a side note about Vang Vienne.

I heard like a year after I went, there was one day where three Australians died all on the same day, separate accidents.

Separate accidents.

Separate accidents.

Yeah, so they probably drowned or did something like I did, dove into the rocks.

And that's when the government came in and bad press.

And they were like, you need to close down all these.

I mean, is this kind of what it looked like?

No,

that looks

search like Vang Vien tubing or something.

Oh, yeah.

Because that looks like way too calm and subdued.

That's starting to look, I think that's the very damn.

Do they have that

big water, a big balloon over it?

I think VN tubing.

Okay, I'll look that up.

And so then the government came in.

I think they forced them to close all of the riverside bars.

For

they were closed for maybe like

two or three years, but now I have heard they're starting to open back up.

Yeah, like that one.

If you go over to

over to your right.

This.

Yeah, if you hit that one.

Yeah, like that's something you can.

This music.

Absolutely not.

Oh, it's just a promo.

Oh, yeah,

they got

that.

Is that me without hair?

Was I there and not known?

And these, like, the water slides and the robe swings are all pretty

shoddily made.

Yeah, I mean, like, who built that?

A fucking carney?

Yeah.

Look at all these whites.

It's having a blast.

Look how happy they all are.

Oh, buckets?

Did you drink buckets?

Yep.

Drank some buckets.

Dude, buckets are...

Oh, my God.

Australia, if you send a bucket to an Australian, they're just like game on.

Yeah, if you're just, and they will just do Red Bull vodka buckets.

And, I mean, if you drink enough Red Bull vodka buckets, that's going to feel like meth after a while.

They also sometimes, I saw this more in Thailand, but did you see the laughing gas stands?

Yeah, those are great.

Yeah.

Yeah, I did that in Full Moon Party episode coming.

Nice.

I did make it to a full moon party.

Yeah, separate episode.

We got to stay in Love's.

But yeah,

did you love it, though?

I did.

I did.

I mean, so you're just on tubes drinking, just like this.

Yeah.

And what, like, like there, there'd just be a rope you pull yourself in?

Yeah.

You pull yourself into these bars and just.

And then go in and pay?

How did you have money?

Like a little sack?

That's That's not.

You probably had a plastic bag of cash.

And little, just shit liquor.

Shit liquor.

Everyone's fucking.

Are people fucking on there?

Not on the river, but like at night?

Or is it just all for hanging out?

I did not get laid in Laos, but I assume so.

Did you know other people that did?

Wow.

I assume people are getting laid in Laos.

Yeah, this might be me, this guy.

Yeah.

And then if you go back to the Google search, I saw one more photo that

that one looks like

at some point you just get like a Lao's most dangerous attraction.

Yeah, the Lao's most dangerous attraction.

Oh my god.

Recording?

I am for once.

Tubing and bang bang.

Wow.

20 people died in 12 months.

Yeah, so that's, but I have heard it's starting to come back to life.

People are still going to drown and die.

I mean, it's like don't drink and die.

That's what killed the guy who did the remake of Hallelujah.

Whatever his name is.

Well, don't drink and drink.

Yeah, definitely don't drink and drive.

No, drink and dive.

Oh, yes.

Yeah.

Don't dive.

But you can drink and float.

Drinking and floating, I just don't know.

Just don't dive.

Look at this.

Yes.

Never dive.

And never try to freewilly it off.

Look how many people.

I mean, someone's falling off there.

Someone's getting drunk and just shoving.

Yeah.

Someone's bumping.

Part of the problem, too, is that people would get on rafts, be floating down the river, and then float past all the bars and keep on going and then just end end up in the jungle it's like if if you never someone will get me you're used to an american version of like there's safety nets or somewhere it's like end of the ride yeah yeah yeah but there's no sign that says this is the end of the ride they're just like you just at some point need to climb onto the shore like if it's like if it's like a terrain park in like park city or something there's like a little net like end of terrain park yeah yeah you're not you're not getting any signs so you just keep going like you just keep going and all of a sudden you're like i'm in the middle of the jungle wow there's just tigers Yeah.

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Do you see any wildlife while you're on this river?

No,

except for humans.

That is wildlife.

I mean,

and what's the weather like?

Very similar to Thailand.

I mean, look at these mountains in the back drive.

This was the first place.

This may as well be Yosemite.

This was the first place I saw the limestone mountains.

Uh-huh.

And, like, they have those on some of the islands in Thailand, too, but those are just beautiful.

Wow.

They kind of look like the Avatar Mountains.

Really?

Or they kind of look like

Endor, I think, in Star Wars.

One of those movies was filmed in Guilin.

Oh, in there?

Guilen, China, China has very similar mountains to the ones in Laos, and that's where they filmed the

rebel base in Star Wars.

What, like this?

Yeah.

Damn.

That's beautiful.

Imagine that just like

that.

Looks more my speed, those pools right there.

Wow.

Did you see anything like that?

Luang Pro Bong, that's the other city.

Okay, yeah.

Did you ever get there?

I think we had to go there first.

We took like one of those sleeper buses.

So it was like a 12-hour bus.

I took one of those in Vietnam and he was like, it's a sleeping bus.

I'm like, what's the difference between a sleeper bus and a sleeping bus?

And he's like, I'm not the one who speaks English.

What is it?

And I'm like, I think it's the same thing.

He goes, no, it's a sleeping bus.

So maybe a sleeper bus might just be a long-ass bus ride.

A sleeping bus is the buses that do have

a bed, chairs go backwards.

Yeah, where you can actually be completely laid out.

Yeah, if you're 5'7 or below like Vietnamese people.

Search.

So like this, you'd float down this and see those mountains back.

Wow.

I mean

forget about the boozing and degeneracy

and what'd you call the drug?

Yaba.

Yaba.

Yaba daba.

This is gorgeous.

Oh, it was.

If you're just smoking a J,

drinking a beer, this is Montana.

This is anywhere.

Yeah, that's why like when I first arrived, like I was in heaven for a while on those shrooms and then just everything went downhill.

And then you did the right thing by taking untested drugs.

You did the right thing.

Yeah.

And by the end of it, I was like, I got to get the fuck out of the house.

How long did it take your feet to repair?

I ended up like I was wearing flip-flops at first.

After that, I had to wear like socks and shoes for the rest of the trip.

No.

Yeah, because I was just in so much pain.

Damn.

But the worst was actually the cheeks, just because you're surrounded by great food.

But then I like literally could only drink smoothies because I had so many cuts in my mouth.

Damn.

Yeah.

It just looks gorgeous.

Did you

keep up with that guy that you were friends with?

Yeah, he now lives in Japan.

He married a Japanese woman, lives there.

Yeah.

Has a Japanese son.

Damn.

That's pretty cool.

What else do you get into in Laos?

I mean, I know it's funny because a lot of these trips are Southeast Asian trips.

Yeah.

I'm trying to cover just one country.

I know.

There's Danny, the other guy, too.

He's like, I came from China, then went to Laos.

Yeah,

that's the thing because I think after the Yaba story, I was like, we got to get out of of Laos.

Yeah.

You weren't even fucked with.

You didn't get arrested or anything.

No, I wasn't.

Yeah, it was just my own doing.

I never got arrested or anything.

But yeah, so I didn't do a ton of time in Laos.

So, I mean, I don't know if you've ever touched on the Philippines.

I did a trip there.

She's a very good person.

We'll do that next

episode.

Yeah.

I actually have not.

That's another place I wanted to go in Southeast Asia and then just never made it there.

Yeah.

No, it's worth going.

There's definitely not like a drug scene in the Philippines.

Well, not now, right?

Oh, yeah, because they had, that guy's no longer in power, but they did have.

Yes.

Punishable by death.

Punishable by death, but then also he'd be like, if you turn in a drug dealer,

we'll pay you like a couple hundred bucks.

So then people were just

like turning in dead bodies and just being like, this guy was a drug dealer, I swear, and getting paid by the government.

Well, that's how the fucking COVID numbers got so high, right?

Every death was like, COVID.

Oh,

there's our million.

Yes, exactly.

Um, if you search Guilin, China, that's another spot where they have these beautiful limestone mountains.

How do you spell it?

You think G-U-I-L-I-N

Guilin, yeah, that wow, like that's like the limestone mountains, Wow.

Steroids.

I mean, look at that.

Bigger, bigger, bigger.

Look at that, though.

God damn.

And float down to the river like that and just see all that shit.

Wow.

God, I want to go there.

I mean, you should.

I recently got a visa to China again.

Again, they're still giving them out?

Yeah, they are.

I mean, look at that.

Floating down that river would be

tremendous.

It is incredible.

And like, if you go, there's Guilin, but then there's a smaller tourist town called Yang Shuo, where a lot of foreigners go, and that place is incredible.

I want to see where this is in China.

I don't know what to do.

Do you have to find a place and then pull back until you realize the context there is Hong Kong down there?

Wow.

Okay.

Jesus, landlocked.

Shenzhen's right there.

Hong Kong's right there.

This is...

Here's what I think.

This is what I want to explore in China.

See this, where it's like city, city, city, city.

And then this is just blank?

Yeah.

It's just like, why?

There's a lot of desert there.

I think.

Isn't that like the Gobi Desert?

Oh, okay.

That makes sense.

And not just like not worth it to the side.

And then, yeah, and then this area all down here is Tibet.

And you need to get like...

You can't just go to Tibet with a Chinese visa.

You have to get like another visa that allows you to go to Tibet.

Wow.

So that's tough.

I have not been there.

I did go to Kunming, which is, oh, what's that called?

Yunnan.

And did a hike there called Tiger Leap.

That's where the Hunan and Hunan food is from?

No,

Hunan.

Yunnan, and then there's Hunan.

You did a tiger what?

Hunt?

Tiger Leaping Gorge is the name of a hike.

It's like a two-day hike or three-day hike.

I think it's the most beautiful hike I've ever been on in my life.

Dude, I'm trying to get, you know, the Camino de Santiago, whatever?

Camino.

Oh,

the

Camino Real or maybe in like bottom of France to all the way through oh no no no so it's like a whatever but then they have these in like Austria Italy border and then we did one in Myanmar for like three days two nights and my thought was they must have them in China these like longer hikes where you they just get you places Appalachian Trail PCT yeah you know or just like just hella long day hikes yeah long day hikes and then they'll have some places where you can stay on the boots yeah in austria those i mean that that was awesome that was like the first god that's that was the first

um it's in

it's in yunnan near kun kunming yeah you you would fly into kunming um

yeah i definitely plan on going back to china because they they i recently was able to get a 10-year tourist visa so that means like if i want to go to china any time in the next 10 years like how'd you get a 10-year tourist visa i think so over covid they like they kind of kicked a lot of the foreigners out, or they just weren't allowing any foreigners to come.

And so many, I would say about 80, 90% of my friends that lived in China all left over COVID because the lockdowns were getting really crazy towards the end.

And

they're now realizing they're like, oh, you know what?

We would actually like some foreigners back.

And so they're trying to promote Chinese tourism again.

Wow.

Okay, so I have a couple of questions on this pod.

That seems like that's unless there's anything else you got got onto on Laos, but it seems like a quick internet.

It was great story.

Laos was a blurry.

Great fun time, though.

Yes.

Yeah, I really want to do that.

It seems like

China, I've been to and I want to go back, but it seems like I got to see, but it seems like that time on the river is really an 18 to 30-year-old time.

Yeah, probably, unless you just hop on the river and float and don't

float.

Yeah, just float.

Drink and boost.

God damn, I'm hot in here.

I feel like you could drink and do some shrooms.

That's like, those are, as long as you're not getting blackouts.

And also, shrooms are the same everywhere.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Pretty much.

Yeah.

You're not going to be like, oh, I took like a bad batch.

Right, right, right.

There's no bad batches.

No.

You know what you're getting.

Yeah.

So here's my questions.

Yes.

Generally, I'll tell you both and you can answer whichever one you want.

Where else?

It's going to be another place you're like, it's been in your mind you want to go to and give me a travel tip.

It doesn't have to be your number one travel tip.

Things I'll get a lot is Pac Light, but like anything that you're like, oh, I always try to get this.

Mine, now that I'm remembering one, is bring a dube tube.

Because you're going to find a joint.

You're not going to want to smoke it right away.

It's going to be ruined.

Bring a dube tube.

Bring a dube tube.

Anyway, so what do you got?

I've got one travel hack.

If you ever want to bring shrooms abroad,

because you don't want to worry about finding them there,

I've just been...

crumpling them up and mixing them in with trail mix and then resealing the trail mix and that's worked in like three countries.

Yeah, who's going to look through Granola?

Yeah, and be like, whoa, what is this?

It just blends in with the rest of the Trail Mix.

It's a great travel tip.

That's a great travel tip.

There you go.

Do I have anything?

I wonder if I have any tips for non-drug use.

No, that's okay.

And then a place that I would like to travel to.

I've still have never been to India.

I don't think it would be like a super comfortable trip.

No, it would not be, no way.

But

in terms of filming content,

it would be awesome.

So what do you do?

You have, what's your like deal here?

I got some shit up here on you.

Wait, you have a YouTube page?

Yeah, I do.

Did you go and do shit?

Yeah, where I've done travel series in a bunch of different countries.

When I first started working for Barstool, almost all my content was in China, but like now I've gone all over the place.

That's a vid I did with Pong Zai, who's like a Chinese drinking legend.

Really?

He's known for his tornado chugs.

When you take a big beer and give it a spin,

and it just pours in.

Yeah.

Wow.

Yeah,

my most recent trip was actually going back to China

where I went to Hong Kong Sevens, which is one of the most absurd sporting events I've been to.

What is it, rugby?

It's a

rugby sevens.

A Sevens event, but they like cordon off the self-stands and they just make it like a lawless area.

And so it's like a costume party with people from all over the world.

Wow, look at them all dressed up like Egyptians.

Yeah, doing all sorts of substances.

I brought.

Is that you?

No.

Yeah.

Well, you look like shit.

Oh, I way better.

I was feeling like shit.

You look way better now, man.

Oh, yeah.

And actually, that's when the Molly was hidden.

Yeah, so I'll try to do like three or four travel series a year and then put out.

Travel series.

Well, yeah, because I'll travel to a country and then I'll try to drop, you know, six to 10 vids.

Do you have like

a focus on these things?

Is it like about a person or is it about just like you just let it come to you?

I've like some of them I'll have a goal.

I actually coached American football in Uganda.

They're getting into American football out there.

That's another episode.

Yeah, so that's

great.

Uganda.

No one's been to Uganda.

That's what Israel is going to be.

Did you know that?

I did, actually.

Yeah.

I did some research.

They probably should have gone with Uganda in the end.

Too much trouble in Palestine.

Yeah, but I was thinking like Jews get sick very easily.

Like, they

would complain about their allergies.

I don't know how well they're going to fare with like malaria and yellow fever.

Yeah.

Oh, that's you right there.

Look at this.

Halftime speech.

Is that the Ugandan football team?

Yes, it is.

That's the Wanton Dawn on Instagram.

What is it on

YouTube?

It's the Wanton Dawn as well.

Wow.

God is high Zai today.

Hell, I'm ready to die.

Hell yeah.

Well, it's just football, bro.

Chill out.

You're not a fucking Ferengi.

This guy,

this was, so this guy was born and raised in Uganda, but then he lived in China for a bit.

And China is where he learned how to play football.

What?

And so he kind of spoke like he was from Georgia.

He somehow picked up like

a Georgian accent out there.

So he spoke perfect English.

Wow.

But he was like a born leader.

He really knew how to motivate the troops.

Wow.

That's one time Dan and the Barstool site.

Yeah.

And like, I would say some of the most exotic places I've been would be Tajikistan.

That's always called me.

Yeah.

Have you ever heard of the sport of Buskashi?

What is that?

There's like 100 men on horseback.

It's pretty much headless goat polo.

Yeah.

I have.

I got to see it.

You saw it?

Yeah.

I got to watch that live.

Insane.

Because because there's no uh sidelines, so at times you're watching, and then the horses will just choose to all charge the sidelines, and then everyone just has to run for their life.

Damn,

um, all right, Don.

Well, fuck you out, you got to come back, yeah, to another country.

I would love, I would love to be back.

This is so fucking hot.

Why is AC doing nothing?

It's getting hotter in here, right?

It did start to get hotter for a bit.

What the fuck?

It said it's 64.

Yeah,

um,

I guess I'll plug this.

I am going to be at the Paris Olympics, so I'll be putting it out.

It's coming up soon.

It's July 26th to

August 10th.

But I just found out that the Airbnb I rented does not have an AC.

Yeah, ACs are hard to come by.

I went there for a writing class for two weeks, and it was like Airbnb's just with AC, cut it down to like 8%.

Everything else was like, no way.

Just don't do it.

Yeah, I'm a little worried about that, but it should be fun.

You're going to be fucked.

You will not be able to sleep.

You are fucked.

Fucked.

But enjoy it.

But it's hot as fuck and humid, too.

Someone told me you.

You're sleeping in this.

You're gonna be sleeping in this.

I asked a local guy in Paris.

He was like, we've actually had a very cold summer.

So fuck off.

So far.

Yeah, so far.

But then he's like, but in August.

In August, it could be a problem.

But yeah.

And I recently got a live streaming backpack.

Yeah.

So now I could fly anywhere in the world and do like a live stream because the backpack has

like a Wi-Fi modem that works all over the world.

So, if you ever want to travel someplace random and do a bunch of live streams, I never live stream, but I would record

places.

Live stream kind of sucks because then it's like I'm here in this place, and now I'm like not immersed in it.

I'm like still focused on people back home.

Yeah, like reading the chat and everything like that.

Yeah, it's just like, I don't know, I want to just do it and tell you about it later.

Yeah, that's actually the hardest part about making bids.

There are times when

I always feel like if something cool is happening, I feel like I have to be filming, but there are times when you just want to sit back and enjoy it.

Yeah, like this Laos thing.

Imagine like, hey, so you're on this drug.

Tell me how do you feel?

Where are you going to go next?

And you're like, no, no.

Let me tell you at the end of it.

Yep.

Exactly.

Fuck.

Okay, we got to stop.

This fucking sucks.

Well, Don, it was a pleasure to meet you.

It was a pleasure meeting you, too.

Yeah, I'm glad we could finally do this.

Sorry, I just fucking rubbed my fucking sweat on my hand and then shook your hand.

No, it's fine.

Everybody, follow him.

Bell Juan, Tom, Don on everything.

YouTube, Instagram, give him a follow.

And then great pictures roll over.

Donnie Does World.

Donnie Does World on Twitter.

Get off Twitter, everybody.

You should not be on this.

It's the most negative place in the world.

Yep.

Do you have any pictures from Bengiang?

I do.

I have probably, because I lost my camera, but I think I have like four.

You can send them to me.

Yeah, yeah, for sure.

Yeah, I'll put them in there.

I'll send those to you.

I have a guy that made a cartoon about parts of the Yabba story.

Oh, really?

Yeah, so if you wanted to throw some clips of that into the pods.

All right.

Yeah, sure.

Send it to me.

We'll see what they can do.

All right, sweet.

Kathy, figure it out.

All right.

Let's do it again sometime.

Let's do it again.

Everybody,

you be tripping over and out.

Well, that's the episode, everybody.

I hope you enjoyed it.

Thank you, Don.

For real.

Brother, anytime, anytime you're in New York, I mean like every time you're in New York.

Come by, let's cover another country.

Laos.

One of my biggest regrets in life is not going to Laos.

I did do some fun stuff.

There's sometimes you do this thing where you're like, you can't,

you got to make a decision.

Like, I had friends who went to, when I was in Ecuador for six months, they went to Costa Rica for like three weeks.

And I was like, ah, I found out later.

I was like, it was one of Bandit's friends' owners.

And I was like,

and I was like, damn, I'm jealous.

And then she was like, but didn't you go to Ecuador?

for six months.

I'm like, yeah, but that trip, I would have loved to go.

And she goes, we went there while you were in Ecuador for six months.

I'm like, yeah, I want to do both.

And I wanted to do both.

And instead of going to Laos, I went to a Vipassana retreat

in north

western Thailand.

And it was fucking great.

It really was.

It really was quite cool.

I fell in love briefly.

And I learned some meditation.

I'll show you some right now.

This is a walking meditation.

So you put...

One foot in front of another one and you go boo doo do.

So you go like this.

You're just like, it's not kind of like that.

It's, no, no, it's regular stepping.

I remember now.

And you're supposed to wipe everything out of your mind.

I mean, I guess I'll cover this when I do Thailand for myself.

But you go, boo, wait.

You're supposed to concentrate on this, but you're thinking, I'm putting my heel down, my toe down.

My left heel comes up, my left toe comes up, my right heel comes up, my left toe down, up, down.

And then you just cleared your mind.

All your thoughts of revenge and bitterness and anger all float away as you go heel down, toe down, heel up, toe up, heel down, toe down, heel up, toe up.

I might be doing too much.

It might just be like, heel down, toe down, heel down, toe down, heel down, toe down, boo doe, boo doe, boo dope.

But I'm thinking of revenge.

It's like, all right, many people have thought of revenge over the years.

You're not unique.

Bannet, come here.

You're not unique.

Everybody's had these thoughts.

You're just one of a million people.

Every second that has these same thoughts.

That guy's not special.

That guy's just one of many.

Look at that guy.

He's thinking, look at all the people who have thought of revenge.

There's nothing special about them at all oh all of a sudden you realize i don't have my thoughts anymore boo dough boo dough heel down toe down heel down toe down heel down toe down heel down toe down and i did that instead of going to laos and partying the way don did bandit uh

come here come here

anyway

i'm still jealous i didn't come i wanted to do the

live like uh

Live like a

Bennett.

Uh-uh, buddy.

No, come this way.

Live like a a gibbon they have the gibbon experience in north western laos right on the border right around from chiang rai i wanted to go there

i was told it was really cool bannock come um

but whatever don you're a fucking sick man man um

leave your votes for guests of the year and uh episode of the year leave your top 10 in the comments from now till the end of the year um

And we'll call all those.

I think that's it.

Oh no.

My special, America Sweetheart, is coming January 14th to Netflix.

Spread the word, you guys.

Tell everybody.

This is...

This is another great one.

I'm doing the best I can here, and I got a message for you.

And I'm doing it in comedy form.

I'm doing it in comedy form.

Everything I learned at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival, I'm now taking and putting it into a regular American degenerate stand-up comedy.

I hope you enjoy the things I'm doing, and I know you're going to enjoy this.

It's January 14th on Netflix.com.

Also, I got the

farewell tour.

Here we go.

What do we got?

Lake Tahoe, Pittsburgh, Agent will be there.

Providence, sold out, Agent will be there.

Tampa, Denver, Schaumburg, Agent will be there.

Seattle,

Portland, Atlanta, the real Portland, the ones that lost its city to the homeless people.

It's a war zone, according to the news, but when you go there, it's actually quite nice and there's great coffee, good donuts.

Portland, Calgary, Edmonton, Vancouver,

Portland, Denver, Tampa, Nashville.

Adrian will be with me for that.

And check out the Dark Queen on Netflix.

Have you guys not seen it?

I know she's not super popular, so not as many people are going to be passing it around.

So I need you guys to pass it around.

It's got to be a top five special of the year.

Got to be.

And I say that because my special is next year.

Today's episode is produced by Your Mom's House Network.

It's edited by Alan Caffey.

Thank you, Alan.

All right, guys.

Until next week.

I don't know how to say anything, Laos.

Bye.