Jimbo Randall Met A Wizard feat. Sam

Today,

in 2013,

I did the vulnerability.

Video, like,

obtain Wi-Fi in Mazuin with local with ATNT Fiber with O-Fi.

ATNT connected the change.

ATNT Fiber has limited the case, which is the service that covers Wi-Fi extended ATNT with carbon distinction.

He's a hot, hot number.

Sammy?

Sorry for coughing.

If you want to see the visuals of this episode, then head to auntieDonnaClub.com and give us your money.

If not, just enjoy this episode, enjoy your life.

I'm not in this episode, so it's going to be even better.

Enjoy!

Hi, welcome to the Auntie Donna podcast.

My name is Zachary Rowan.

I'm joined, as always, by Mark Bernano.

Broden Kelly couldn't be here, he had an opportunity with old media that he couldn't refuse.

Could not turn it down.

But we do have a guest,

friend of the podcast it's been a while so this is maybe a lot of our new listeners don't know this

this man is the head writer of all of our

all of our content so he writes with us he also directs our live theater shows and and he's headwriter on them as well you'd be very familiar with him if you are fans of the anti-donna podcast episodes one to 150 yeah around about that you would have experienced this man quite a lot.

But also, if you are subscribed to the Auntie Donna Club, patreon.com slash Auntie Donner, this.

Or the Auntie Donner Club.com, we bought the.

Or the Auntie Donner Club.com.

Just redirects to

patreon.com slash Auntie Donner.

Or the Auntie Donner Club or whatever it is.

I really don't know.

I don't know.

I don't know.

Is it patreon.com slash the auntie Donner Club?

I know, but that's why we changed it to

auntie Donner.com to type that in.

And also, you know, if patreon ever fucks us we we've built a different yeah and good luck trying to fuck us patreon you can't we'll go straight to only fans we will we'll do lewds but no nudes and i've been i've got a whole folder on my pc ready to upload of my lewds

not nudes no nudes but we'll imply that they're nudes yes

I will be wearing the tiniest of bikinis.

I'll go, check out this sexy photo for $15, and then you buy it, and it's a lewd, but it'll be a good lewd.

Yes, and there'll be a second paid-for one, because that's the free one, where you have to pay for each individual photo.

But the second one that we have, which is a paid subscription, there's no extra pricing on those, and you get

full nudity videos

of using the same time.

And for a limited time, only $10 for that one for the next three months.

Yeah, for the next three months, you can get 30% off your $10 subscription to that.

But enough about that.

Enough about our OnlyFans.

We have a guest in our midst who we've already introduced.

Sam Lingham.

Hello.

Hello.

Thank you for having me.

It's a pleasure.

Sam, people.

No, sorry.

No, you go.

No, sorry.

No, you go.

Sam, people know you.

No, I think you should go.

Sorry, yeah.

Oh, you go.

Sam.

Sorry.

No, it's all right.

You go.

I don't actually have anything.

I had something, but I forgot.

Sam,

people know you

because you're from

Auntie Donna.

Yeah.

And if people are familiar with the podcast,

episodes about one to 150, or if you'll subscribe to the Patreon,

patreon.com/slash Auntie Donna,

you will be very familiar with Sam.

Sam often plays little games with us on there, a Mario party.

Also, we should say Sam is our head rider.

You did say I believe we did.

That's a very head rider thing to say.

He's a very header.

He's been always savvy to wear of the bigger picture at all.

All right, actually, we don't need to mention that.

Narrative threads, that's been mentioned, so this would be a thematic tautology.

Okay.

Those sort of things.

Okay.

Tautology.

I'm going to go Google that.

Oh, it's my favourite pasta.

Now,

Sam is here.

Sam is here.

Because Sam is here.

A lot of people would be

pardoned.

They want to know.

They want to know.

A lot of people want to know.

They want to know.

A lot of people want to know

who's Sam and what makes him tick.

Now, Sam.

Why are you here, Sam?

I wasn't privy to this conversation.

Why am I here?

Yeah, yeah.

Also, yesterday, Mark was like, Broden's got an old media opportunity.

Can you come in?

And I said, and usually it's no.

Usually it's like, no, I'm busy.

I'm busy.

I need to have some dining.

And I was like, no, I can come in.

I'm free.

Let's go.

Let's do this, Mother.

Sam also said, I have a, the only thing is that I have a Zoom meeting that I have to do at around about 11.

And I said, don't worry, man.

I'm going to get in touch with Lindsay, our producer, make sure that there's a space available for you so that you can come in.

You can do that.

I'll let you know by the end of the day.

And then I went home and I went into tidy my garage and I ended up playing

Fleetwood Mac dreams on the drums for an hour and a half.

And I lost track of time and then I checked my phone.

I had two missed calls from Broden

and called Broden back and he said, Hey, man, I did that thing you said you were going to do that you didn't do.

And I was like, I forgot.

I forgot that I said I was going to do that.

It's pretty cool.

It's pretty cool.

Sam, you're famous for having played.

Let me finish.

You're famous for having

played a character.

Can I actually, I thought of a fun way we could introduce this concept.

I'm going to play a new fan of the podcast.

And you're going to play Mark.

Okay.

Oh, hi.

Hi.

Hi, new fan of the podcast.

What's your name?

My name is Jimbo.

Jimbo, what's your surname?

Randall.

Jimbo Randall.

And where do you live?

I live in

the CBD of Melbourne.

I live on Swanston Street, number 7, apartment 32.

And what do you do for work?

I work in data processing.

And what is your favourite character from the Auntie Donna podcast?

Well, I'm a new fan.

I haven't listened to the first 150 episodes.

So you've only listened to 151 up until until so my favorite.

So my favorite characters are the new ones like

South African Sams, who I presume are new.

Well, you know, no, they've been.

And I think Silly Boy is funny.

Ha ha ha.

Well, yeah, Silly Boy's feeling you.

Feeling you.

Yeah.

Well, who's this guy?

Yeah, well.

I am Sam.

How are you doing?

I have some questions for Jimbo.

Is that okay?

Please.

What's it like living in the CBD?

You know, I thought it would be like living in New York City, but the thing is, New York City has more parks.

Yes.

I mean,

you're a stone's throw from the Botanic Gardens, aren't you?

Well, no, I'm more in the middle.

I'm closer to Flinders Tree.

You said number seven, yeah?

Did I say seven?

Yeah, seven.

So that kind of implies to me the bottom of Swanston.

No, I'm closer to...

I don't know.

I'm closer to Southern Cross.

You're closer to Southern Cross.

Right, yeah.

Not many parks up there.

The flagstuff gardens is kind of there.

Yeah, and it's a bit of a walk.

I just would love a little park.

You know, a couple of little parks and maybe some town squares would have done that.

Yeah, Mike.

Yeah.

Yeah, what do you uh what do you what's your game?

I love blackjack.

Yeah, yeah.

Have you won big?

I won big, I've lost bigger.

Yeah, isn't that always the way?

Are you okay?

No, no, no, no, no.

No, no, no, no.

I live in the CBD and I'm sad.

Do you have any other questions for Jimbo?

Because he's kind of making me uncomfortable.

He's making you uncomfortable.

Yeah, a bit.

Why?

Just the tone of his voice, the deadness behind his eyes.

They appear to have glazed over.

I go to the Kino.

That's where I watch my movies.

Or Hoyts.

The Hoyts at Melbourne Central.

Yeah, that's good.

What have you been enjoying at the Hoyts?

Or the Kino?

The Hoyts?

What did I watch at the Hoyts?

I'm excited for the new Godzilla versus Kong.

Really?

Godzilla and Kong, which might have already come out by the time this is out.

But not that we're banking them.

We're baking them?

I thought you were a new fan of the podcast.

I'm the new Zach.

You're the new Zach new Zach.

I'll replace Zach.

All right.

Well, there was a purpose for this character.

Hi, it's me, Zach.

You're meant to tell him about Judas.

I was getting to it.

I just thought there was a lot of setup.

There was a lot of exposition going on.

Not that funny.

To be honest.

Maybe we could explore Jimbo.

Yeah, we could explore Jimbo.

That's really good.

Oh, hi, it's me, Jimbo.

Jimbo, let's get straight to this.

Let's just cut through the shit.

Get straight to it.

Let's cut through the shit.

Jimbo, are you aware that on the Auntie Don podcast, we do characters?

I know you are.

You said you love Silly Boy and that you love South African Sams that you consider to be new.

Have you seen the Netflix show?

Yeah, I love the Netflix show.

Sick.

Did you see Coffee Cafe?

No.

No, no one.

No one fucking did.

No one fucking did this.

This is the fucking waste of time.

It's free.

It was a waste of our time.

I love the Netflix show.

What have you guys been doing for the last three years?

Fucking, I can't even, don't even get me started.

All right.

So anyway, um so sam is our head writer oh hi do you subscribe to the patreon sorry i just had a big gulp of coffee into the microphone lucky i'm not a professional podcaster yeah you'll be forgiven sam

no i'm not a i don't subscribe to the patreon okay um you should

i don't like it at that level yeah i know everyone has a different monetary level where do you listen to the podcast Like, what are you doing when you put the podcast on?

I'm doing data entry.

Data entry.

Yeah, and I laugh sometimes.

I'm sitting there at my computer and my coworkers go, what are you doing?

And I'm laughing.

But they think you're nuts.

Yeah, they think I am.

Yeah.

So Sam used to do a character called Judas on the podcast.

Like the biblical character?

Yeah.

And he'd talk about silver.

The character liked silver.

Love silver.

Oh, that's, yeah, Judas, you know.

So you're just sort of reducing the character of Judas down to that moment where he accepted silver.

It wasn't sort of a monetary thing.

It was just he liked the

element silver.

But I don't think that's metal silver.

It's necessarily a negative, but you often reduce

wine into a delicious sauce for a steak.

Okay.

So I just don't think it's fair to say.

You're not really a foodie, though.

What do you eat?

I'll go to Chinatown sometimes.

I'm so close now.

Yeah, I love, you know, fried rice.

Yeah.

That's great.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Sorry, I'm not like an internal, I'm not an interesting

sorry thing.

No, but fried rice is delicious.

I really like fried rice.

I'm just like a regular guy that listens to your podcast.

You know, I'm a little bit sad.

But so is everyone.

COVID was tough.

COVID was tough.

That was a while ago now.

So we've done our part in terms of let you know that Sam used to play a character on the podcast.

Where is this going, Neil?

What do you mean?

Where is this going?

You said there was a point.

Jimbo, you've come in for a reason.

Yeah, yeah.

And I knew that the part that Sam and I had to play

sort of fleshing this character out, making something happen, was to introduce Sam, to let you know that Sam played a character early on in the podcast called Judas.

Where's Broden?

He had an old media opportunity.

I love Broden.

I love Cowdoy.

Yes.

Yes.

We all do.

Yeah.

He's my favourite.

But now, what do we do?

Like, where is this going?

What do you mean?

Well, you came in and

with the expectation of us introducing you.

We're here to help introduce this Judas concept.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Well, but I can stick around if you want.

Yeah.

All right, that's good.

I mean, stick around.

Do you have any concerns about your job in data entry being replaced with automation or AI?

Well, I'm moving up.

I've moved up into

management now.

So

I have a team of data entry people under me.

And yeah, we're replacing a lot of them with AI.

But I think there's going to be a place for people, you know, you have to tell the AI what to do.

Yeah.

There's a lot of your job going into this data today and then they just go off and do it.

Sounds important.

Well, you know.

Yeah, I do it for our government agencies.

We we're a contractor.

So we're we're we're a private company.

Yep.

Oh, God.

But we're contracted to the Victorian uh government and to a couple of other so you know, and they do some important stuff, you know, and they yeah.

There's been a lot of talk at a Canberra about the government relying too much on private contractors to do a lot of their work.

How do you do you think that's going to impact your sector?

Yeah, I think they're talking more about like consultants and stuff.

The problem is there's a big ebb and flow.

So, you know, if they were to do that, they would have a lot of people on contract.

We can get people on contract.

They would have to hire long-time employees and that sort of thing.

It just becomes very complicated.

So, yeah, maybe.

I don't know.

I'll just get a different job.

I don't love my job.

It's not a passion of mine.

I've done it for about six years.

What are your passions?

none really I I play video games what have you been what have you been playing

um

uh I just uh been playing uh well my

so my um

my uh the cord

yeah the Ethernet cord yeah the back of my PS4

broke PS4 yeah yeah and I well I've got a PS5

at the moment yeah but uh my uh

it's at my mum's house at the moment Right.

The PS5.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Why don't you yeah, why?

Well, because my

half-brother

wanted to play with it.

So I was just being, you know, and I don't play video games that much.

No, I don't really.

I've watched some Tally.

I love Arnie Donna.

Yeah.

Data and True.

I don't know it.

Look, I'm a really regular guy.

Okay.

Yeah, I'm not an interesting.

If you want to replace that Ethernet cable, just go down to Big W.

Yeah.

It's just down there.

Pick up a new one.

Yeah, no, and that's true.

Yeah, I will do that.

I just haven't gotten around to it yet.

Oh, do you know what I watched lately?

What did you watch?

Watch that succession.

That's good, isn't it?

Really?

Yeah, I didn't like any of the characters at first.

But you kind of like them towards the end.

Do you think you like them or you feel for them?

I'm not a writer.

I would.

You wouldn't know.

I wouldn't know.

But, you know, definitely.

Shogun, you're watching any Shogun?

No.

Supposed to be good.

Yeah, yeah, I haven't seen it either.

You know, I don't mind

RuPaul's drag race.

That's fun, isn't it?

Yeah.

Yeah, I thought it was, but it was fun, yeah.

My ex, my ex

liked it.

We watched it.

I haven't watched it since.

We split up a few years back, but

there's an Australian one now, yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, we were in it.

Oh, were you?

Yeah, in season one.

Yeah, cool.

Yeah, no, I was off it by then.

I'm not a funny character.

I really think

I really think you should stop talking to me because I'm not funny.

Yeah, no, no, that's fine.

But there was, I remember there being a point as to why you came into the door.

Literally that you hid from us.

Literally, just to help you introduce the idea of Judas, because I would be, you know, but I just worry that you're hunting for the humour in me.

I'm just I'm concerned for you and and your well-being long term.

Like obviously, you know, you you've not really you've broken up with your partner and there's some lingering feelings around that.

No, not at all.

No, it was pretty good.

But you stopped watching Drag Race?

It was more her show.

Okay.

So,

we asked you about what your passions are.

And you sort of said PS4, but I don't play.

Succession was good.

And then you said RuPaul's Drag Race was the other show.

Oh, yeah.

But you don't watch that anymore.

That's the show that I like.

But like, what do you enjoy?

Yeah, you come home from work, or maybe you've worked from home, you log off on the computer.

You've got all the time in the world.

You don't have to do anything.

You know, it's five o'clock, you don't have to do anything until you wake up in the morning

at say 8:30 a.m.

Yeah, what are you filling that time with?

What makes you happy?

I might check on some tally, like I watched The Office, I love The Office, US one, yeah, yeah, you guys know.

Um,

Ed Helms, Ed Helms, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's cool.

Egg sketch.

We did the egg helms.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

What was that like?

What doing that bit, or just the

just doing that bit?

Yeah.

It was good.

I remember the traffic being loud.

Yeah, there was a lot of loud traffic.

We're at a nice

burger shop in LA.

It's a really nice guy, really funny, really up for it.

Zach kept riffing with him about egg, thinking he was an audio.

Yeah, which was really fun.

That's how I got into you, actually, was the Netflix show.

Was it?

Yeah.

Right.

Yeah, so I might watch The Office.

I'll just scroll on TikTok or Instagram.

Go to bed.

Like come like a long weekend, what are you doing?

Long weekend?

I don't mind the footy, you know, I might watch the footy.

Who do you go for?

Your barrack for?

Isn't it?

But that's like a like a

regular weekend, like a long weekend.

Oh, a long weekend?

Oh, you know.

Are you doing anything special?

No.

Fuck it out.

No.

Are you?

Jesus fucking Christ.

Are you lost?

Are you like, no?

Oh, no, I'm all right.

You know, I'm a bit sad, if I'm being honest.

Just going through the motions.

You sound like someone just going through the motions.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I go, I go.

So, long weekend.

Yeah.

Long weekend.

What is you've got?

There's a long weekend coming up.

It's Thursday.

You're like, want to make the most of this.

What are you doing?

Well, you know, maybe we'll do work drinks on the Thursday night.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah.

And then, you know, maybe I'll go.

Maybe I'll go.

Like I might go to Ballarat.

Yeah.

Yeah.

What What are you going to Ballarat?

I don't know.

You ask,

yeah, maybe I'll go to Ballarat.

I guess more what I'm getting, trying to get to is

are you excited for anything coming up in your life?

Yeah, yeah.

Oh, it'll be fun when this podcast comes out.

Yeah.

If it comes out, yeah, that'll be pretty cool, won't it?

Like, I'll be like.

We don't release every episode.

Oh, you don't?

No, sometimes we'll review them and we're like,

if it's not,

I guess, good.

I've listened to your podcast.

I know that can't be true.

Well, then, just let me reassure you, would be surprised, but what hits the cut.

Yeah, no, this would be cool.

I'll tell my friends I was on the Andy Donna podcast.

So, so, this is what you're looking, and this is sort of like you're sort of plucked out of the ether.

Yeah, this wasn't a planned thing, this wasn't something you were working towards.

So, this sort of surprise happenstance is the one thing you're clinging on to in terms of exciting things in the future.

I'm excited for

I'm excited for the new Batman the one coming out in like 2025 or 2026 yeah 2025

I thought the first Batman was pretty good bit long but pretty good yeah yeah yeah like the

like the Marvels although I don't know about the newer ones yeah okay

we're not gonna unpack that what do you guys what do you guys think about waddy culture

well you know I don't really want to talk about that because what we were originally...

I think we should move on.

I think we should move on.

Well, just because I can't even imagine the kind of things.

Oh, you want to dig into this character?

Okay, so what do you think?

What do I think?

Yeah.

Like, what do you think?

Do you think it's responsible for your pain?

No, no.

I just reckon.

Can you, like, make jokes anymore?

That's what I've read, that you can't make jokes anymore.

Well, you know.

I just...

It's not that you can't make jokes anymore.

It's just that there are.

You've never been able to say whatever you want.

Oh, okay.

And I think I really have a strong opinion either way.

I just

heard

work culture and the ether.

Yeah, right, yeah.

It's just a buzzword to you.

Yeah, I don't care.

Okay.

Anyway.

Okay.

I like

the hangover.

It's really, that's a great movie.

Ed.

Yes.

Ed was in that, yes.

Couldn't make that now.

Now,

I think you could.

Yeah, you could.

You just would replace some of the crook jokes with ones that are just funny and not crook.

You know, that's all.

I'm going to go now.

What?

Don't go.

We've got to tell you about Sam.

I thought you already did.

Well, we did, but there's a whole thing that's happening.

You've just really stuck with this boring character.

Nobody's inherently boring, surely.

Yeah, no one, yeah.

Like, everyone has something.

Yeah, everyone has something.

It's just our job to find out what it is.

Yeah, I guess.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Like, what do you think makes you special?

I've got some nice shirts.

You have some nice shirts.

Where from?

Where from?

Where'd you get them from?

I got them for just like Maya and stuff.

Okay.

Okay.

Yeah.

What colour are they?

They got like

a blue shirt with like a floral pattern.

Alright.

That's a bit of personality there.

That's good.

When did you first get into fashion?

Not really into fashion.

I wanted to get a few nice shirts.

Yep.

At my cousin's wedding.

How was that?

It was nice.

Yeah, it was really nice.

Do you hope to get married one day?

No, no.

Any reason for that?

Yeah, it's just not for me.

I just think it's a bit of an old-fashioned thing.

Okay.

She wanted it.

What are your...

She wanted it.

If she wanted it.

Like, if she wanted it.

Okay.

What are

you doing?

I'm a really normal, boring guy.

I just worry digging.

Well, wait.

Well, let's see.

What turns you on?

What turns me on?

Yeah.

Like sex.

Yeah.

Just straight.

Yeah.

Missionary.

No, I like interesting stuff.

I'm probably like affected by pornography as much as you guys are.

Yeah.

You know, so I like it a bit rough.

Kinky?

Anything?

Any kinky?

Depends what you define kink as.

You know, like, do you like being choked?

No, no.

No.

Do you like being called daddy?

No.

No.

That's weird.

What?

That's weird.

That's weird.

Yeah.

Just like good sex and stuff.

Do you like low jobs?

Yeah, yeah, they're great.

I'm trying to find something.

I'm trying to find something.

I think the thing to do is just leave with this character.

I don't think you should keep digging with this character.

No, because I agree with Sam that everyone has something.

Something.

Everyone must surely have something

that makes them created specifically not to have something.

No, well, I just feel like no one would create a character like that and bring them onto a comedy.

But a very small purpose.

It was to introduce Sam's character.

Right.

And now you're digging into this guy.

But you brought that person in as a listener of the podcast.

Yes.

And I think people who are listening to this podcast, there's something.

And I know, though, I think there's many interesting listeners to this podcast.

Most of our listeners would have fascinating stories to tell.

Yeah.

This guy, not so much.

I didn't bring in one of the interesting ones.

But I think the choice to keep them at that level of uninteresting is as much your fault as it is us.

Right.

But I warned you so many times.

Keep digging if you want.

I'm sure we'll find something.

I mean, are you sure you'll find something?

Do you want me to add something?

Are you sure we'll find something?

Do you want me to add?

Look, keep digging a little bit more.

All right.

See what happens.

Okay.

So,

sexual, you're pretty vanilla, which is fine, by the way.

There's absolutely nothing wrong with that.

It's just, you know, I think it's more important to know what you like

than it is to have any kind of weird, you know,

I like to clamp my dick and fucking put jelly out my ass or whatever it is that people are into, which is all fine.

No, no.

Holidays.

Have you ever been on any holidays?

I went up to Movie World when I was a kid.

Yeah.

And I went to Japan about four years ago.

Okay.

How long did you spend in Japan?

I spent two weeks and I went to every city in Japan in that two weeks.

Every city in Japan.

Every city.

Just

went to the city.

Every single city.

I was just constantly moving.

Major city?

Every major city?

I was there for 14 days.

I went to 14 places.

How did you plan this?

Cheese for Jesus.

this trip?

Cantiki.

Contiki.

Cantiki Jiki.

You did.

Did you meet anyone interesting on that trip?

I met an old wizard.

You met an old wizard?

Wait a second.

Wait, what?

You met a man familiar in the ways of magic and wizardry?

Yeah, yeah.

Okay, did he conjure anything?

No, he gave me his powers.

He gave you

his powers.

The wizard gave you his powers.

He passed them on to you before his untimely death.

Well, he was a medieval wizard.

It was odd that he was in Japan.

He was from medieval England, but he was immortal.

And before he died, he gave me his powers.

Right, and his powers,

what is he proficient in when it comes to his powers?

Well, I still have to learn.

Conjuring.

Yeah, I still have to learn.

He gave me his books to learn.

But so I haven't found the full depth of my powers yet.

What was the name of the wizard?

I never learnt his name.

Is that because to know someone's name is to know them, to have power over them?

He just never said it.

No, he just never said it to me.

I just never said it.

Was he doing the Kentiki tour?

No, he was just there.

I was going for a walk around Tokyo.

Yeah.

And he was in the Shinjukyu district.

Okay.

And he was there.

And I thought, that's funny.

He looks like an old wizard.

And he said, I've got to give you my powers.

I'm about to have my head chopped off.

Bye.

By his mortal enemy, and now mine.

So you took on his mortal enemy

after because he wants the powers.

His mortal enemy wants the powers.

And the only way to get the powers is to try.

Who is the mortal enemy?

I don't know his name.

Do you have any details?

Yeah, I've seen him.

Do you want to describe him?

Sure.

I don't know.

I'm not a podcast.

I don't know what's interesting or not.

But just to be clear for a moment, this is fascinating.

Is it?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I would have brought it up earlier.

Like, this is the fucking craziest thing any normal guest who's come on the show has had to say and has had happened to them.

Oh, you should have just asked.

To say that

you don't have anything interesting going on

is wild considering a wizard in Tokyo gave you his powers.

Is that interesting?

It is interesting.

It's absurdly interesting.

It's just never come up.

You're like the first two people I've ever heard.

It's supernatural.

It's the craziest thing I've ever heard.

Well, no one's ever asked, you know?

it's hard to have make friends when you're a male in your third.

It is hard.

I just think maybe next time someone's like, Hey, what do you do when you get home from work?

You can be like, I come home, I take my bag off, I put my coat up, I open up my old wizarding books.

But I didn't do it after I watch a couple of episodes of The Office, okay.

Maybe like I watch a couple of episodes of The Office, and then I open up my wizarding books, right?

So I should have mentioned that when you asked, because I thought you wanted to know what I did immediately after I got home.

I think just straight out of the gate, if you're on a podcast,

I would bring up almost near immediately.

Yeah, Robby.

Because

it's interesting.

So when I say I go to Ballarat,

what do you do in Ballarat?

Why are you doing that?

Should I have mentioned

that?

What do you do in?

Yeah, yeah.

So I have something like

similar to, you know, how Superman has a fortress of solitude.

Yes, yeah.

I have a fortress under the ground in an old mine in Ballarat where I practice my powers.

Mention that.

Mention that.

That's interesting.

Yeah, no, just going to Ballarat.

Lots of people do that.

I would argue that very few have a hidden underground fortress mine.

Right, so I should mention that when I talk about my Ballarat trip.

Yes.

Yeah, I mean, especially on a podcast, but in day-to-day life as well, when people ask you questions, they're just really trying to connect with you.

They want to know what's interesting.

But no one else does that, so that wouldn't interest them.

It would, but that is interesting about you being supportive.

You know, I think.

But is that a good point of connection?

I should talk about that i think so i think it is a good thing and you should i mention it on my bumble

uh like if if you're up for that i think that'd be great you know like i love watching the office i love getting fried rice in chinatown and i love practicing the mysterious arts of magic

because i can change i can change the the very nature of of reality okay really yeah yeah in what ways uh i've done this interview seven times already okay and you've got the second time you've kept what is the first time i've mentioned that I'm a wizard.

Yeah, right.

What happened to the other ones?

You guys got mad at me and I left.

Six times.

Yeah.

What did you try to do to circumnavigate that?

Well, that's why I brought up the nice shirts.

I thought that would work.

The nice shirts.

Yeah.

The nice shirts.

Yeah, the nice shirts I hadn't mentioned.

You're a fucking idiot.

What do you mean?

It was just that you're a fucking idiot.

I've stopped two atomic world wars.

What?

That's really great.

Incredible.

That's incredible information.

So, like a World War, like a bomb will be dropped, lots of bombs dropped.

Yeah.

Then I'll travel back in time and then I'll fly to the place

and then I'll fly

like a fly.

Like Neo in the Matrix.

Yeah.

And then I will take the nuclear,

I'll mind, I'll use my mind powers to change people's minds.

If the bomb goes, I'll take the bomb, I'll fly it into space.

Yeah.

And then I'll send it off to Jupiter to explode.

Okay.

That's what I've done twice.

Thank you for for doing that.

I really appreciate that.

That's huge.

Yeah.

That's really

big, important,

interesting stuff.

Much more interesting than

the cord, the Ethernet cord on my PS4 is a bit broken and my PS5 is that much broken.

Well, that's right.

Well, and that's why I'm in no rush to change the Ethernet cord.

Because you've got magic and you can sort of.

Yeah, you know, like a video game when you're just pretending, whereas I'll do that most nights.

I'll go out and I'll fly through the universe.

I'll fly through, I can fly to any corner of the universe.

So you said you'd been to Japan four years ago, but you don't consider these other trips to the universe like holidays?

Holidays, I don't like organize it through an agency like Contiki.

It's their reconnaissance.

Yeah, and I'll just go.

Like I only go for a few hours.

I've been to, I've seen the rings of Saturn.

Yeah.

What are they like?

Beautiful.

A lot of rock and ice, I imagine.

Yeah, no, they're beautiful.

They're really beautiful.

Yeah.

Tell me,

dear traveler, is there life on other planets?

Yeah.

I've met them.

You've met them.

Yeah, I speak their language.

I can understand any language.

Any language.

Is it a language you would say that these other entities are speaking?

Yeah.

At first, I wouldn't have described it as language.

Some of them don't use sound.

There's one people, there's one people in the Andromeda galaxy, and they use magnetic pulses to communicate.

But it's as complex and beautiful, they write poetry in it.

It's a beautiful culture.

And I've seen them being born.

I've seen their planet birthed.

I've seen it die.

I've seen this planet's death.

I've seen all

time.

I've seen the Andromeda Galaxy and the Milky Way smash together.

So when you talk, having seen all that, and then you talk about the fact that you like going to Chinatown and getting a fried rice, would you say that's you going, I enjoy the simple, the small things, the humble things that remind me of life and day to day?

Or?

What do you mean by that?

Like, do you enjoy the small things in their simplicity because you've seen everything in its grandiose?

It's just well, I think what he's getting at is that it's odd to be like, What do you do?

What do you enjoy?

And the answer is, I'm not a foodie

fried rice from Chinatown when

you are, from what I've gathered, all-seeing, all-knowing, powers of a wizard,

much more than a normal man.

yeah no i do have the powers of an immortal wizard

yeah godlike powers yeah godlike powers i've seen yeah the whole universe and all of that yes yeah yeah yeah i know what happened before the big bang

what i can't like it's hard to you know it's just hard to describe yeah it's it's uh it's uh very different everything was very different can you use your powers to

Sort of just put what's in your mind, what you've seen into my mind.

I've tried it before.

I tried it with someone, and

they bled out of their eyes and they died.

Yeah, it was too much for a human mind to comprehend.

All right, well,

I think we should probably wrap this up.

We did want to introduce a new character that Sam has been working on, but I'm afraid

we just have to wait for

the next podcast.

Yeah, we'll bring you back in a few weeks or months.

Yeah, that's fine.

So, I should have led with

the fact that I'm a sort of god-like wizard.

Or at least not have had to make us push

so hard and dig so far to discover it.

Because it is, I would argue,

and feel free to disagree.

I would argue it's the most interesting,

not only part of you,

but of any

real guest that we've had.

Any fan of the podcast.

Or maybe you didn't dig deep enough with them.

Wow.

Wow.

Wow.

Wow.

That's.

That's really interesting.

That's really interesting.

That's made me think.

And as we sit here and contemplate,

contemplate such a philosophical

realization,

I think we'll

leave you there, dear listeners.

Sam, thanks so much for joining us on the podcast.

That's okay.

Thank you,

Jimbo.

Oh, that's all right.

No worries.

Yeah, thanks, Jimbo.

That was sick.

Thanks, Mark.

Very welcome.

Sam, we'll have you back in a few weeks or in a bit to

introduce your new character.

Yes, and how about you leave us on a cliffhanger?

I like a little teaser.

What is the name?

Or is that going to give it away?

One little hint.

One little hint.

The name is Bobby T.

Bobby T.

Bobby T.

Well, maybe we'll meet Bobby T and get to learn a little bit about Bobby T with our new outlook on how to speak to guests and see if maybe they have the powers of a wizard or something just beyond fascinating has happened to them just by asking questions.

Thank you so much for being here.

Thanks, Sam.

Thank you.

Don't stay.

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