Road To Redemption with Kail & Becky

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Speaker 9 Welcome to the shit show. Things are going to get weird.
Get weird. It's your fae villain, Kale Wower.

Speaker 9 And you're listening to Barely Famous.

Speaker 8 Surprise, everyone. It is Becky.
For those of you that might not know me, I've was really good friends with Kale for about 10 years.

Speaker 8 We had a little bit of a falling out about five years ago. We are reuniting after five years of not seeing or speaking to each other.

Speaker 9 So I'm so nervous. I haven't seen Becky.
February will be five years since we've seen each other and so we're just like just short of five years.

Speaker 9 If you knew me on any of the shows you know how big of a part Becky played in my life and in my kids lives and so I didn't wear makeup because I knew I would

Speaker 8 I might cry. There was a lot of outside personal issues that we both were just dealing with individually that just worked itself up into something bigger in between us.

Speaker 8 I think that's why it's kind of easy to come back now and be excited because it wasn't like a betrayal as much situation. And so

Speaker 8 yeah, I'm excited.

Speaker 9 I'm excited and I'm nervous and I hope that this is the start to a new like a new friendship with the same person but I think we've both evolved from where where we were when we stopped being friends till now.

Speaker 9 So I hope it's like a new friendship, but just like also rekindling the old one.

Speaker 8 This is fun. I think we're both, you know, different people.
We obviously have talked in the past couple weeks and past month, but it's our first time seeing each other in person.

Speaker 8 And I'm really excited to see, you know, how this goes and where this goes and

Speaker 8 basically reintroduce ourselves as humans.

Speaker 9 Super nervous.

Speaker 8 This feels like 90-day fiancé.

Speaker 8 I've already started crying.

Speaker 8 I'm shaking.

Speaker 8 I was crying out in the wind.

Speaker 8 Oh my god.

Speaker 8 Today's an emotional day.

Speaker 9 Hey, CD, hey, Zach.

Speaker 9 I love y'all too, but it's been five years, so.

Speaker 8 Give me a hug.

Speaker 8 Ah, you're so skinny.

Speaker 9 I literally took like all these videos on my phone, but I didn't think I was actually gonna cry.

Speaker 8 I didn't

Speaker 8 wear makeup because I was like,

Speaker 8 what do I do?

Speaker 8 I love you so much.

Speaker 9 I know. I literally couldn't text.

Speaker 8 I was like, what do we even like? I can't believe this.

Speaker 9 Like five years.

Speaker 9 Thank you. Thank you.
I you, thank you. Today we're gonna have fun.
It's gonna be a good time. So, tell me what you've been up to.

Speaker 9 So, I, you had a house in Jersey before, like, I went to the house that you lived in with Leah before. You did, yeah.
That was the farmhouse.

Speaker 8 That, yes.

Speaker 9 And then, where what happened after that? Did you still own that one? Did you sell it?

Speaker 8 No, so Leah's dad owns it. Leah's brother moved in.
Okay.

Speaker 8 So, Leah's

Speaker 8 like

Speaker 8 very a little bit complicated. Leah's dad was adopted by this woman like 15 years ago.

Speaker 8 Her and her twin sister lived in a house. They never had kids.
Jean took care of them. She was 94, moved in with Jean because her like dementia started getting bad.
Right.

Speaker 8 And then when they were moving her out of her house, you know, the question was, what are they going to do with her house?

Speaker 8 And Jean was like, you know, either Becky and Leah can have it or we're just going to sell it. Like that's...

Speaker 9 The one that you're in now, or the one that's the one that we're in now.

Speaker 8 So, Leah and I moved so incredibly fortunate, like, to be in this house. Like, it's a beautiful home.
Um,

Speaker 8 we wake up every morning, like, very thankful for like this place that we get to live. It's on 20 acres.
It's like perfect. It's like a dream, like, place.
We put a lot of money into renovating it.

Speaker 8 Um, I took six months. I did probably like 75% of the renovations by myself, um,

Speaker 8 which is crazy. I just like learned.

Speaker 9 So when did y'all get engaged and when did y'all get married?

Speaker 8 We got engaged in 2020. Before or after our fallout.
Way after. So we got engaged

Speaker 8 in December on Christmas Eve.

Speaker 9 So when we fell out was in February.

Speaker 8 Correct.

Speaker 9 Of 2020. I was pregnant with Creed.
Yes. You were off with Leah, I think.
Like you guys weren't together? You were like sort of in like a weird place?

Speaker 8 No, we were together um

Speaker 8 we were definitely together but we weren't great okay okay okay

Speaker 8 I always say that if COVID didn't happen that Leah and I would have broken up like if like because of COVID and us being forced to like cohabitate and be together all the time

Speaker 8 We like completely fell back in love with each other. And like, not for nothing.

Speaker 8 I mean, you understand you've dated people through your 20s, but like Leah was 21 when I met her, and like dating through your early 20s is not easy for anyone. Yeah.

Speaker 8 And so the first four years of our relationship was

Speaker 8 four years of dating in your early 20s. And so it was a lot of just like growing pains, figuring out life.
I'm five years older than Leah, so like I was in different places than she was too.

Speaker 8 So yeah, 2020 just like

Speaker 8 reshaped the entire structure. And literally ever since since then, like, nothing, there's been nothing that has like even come close to like coming between us.

Speaker 8 Like, it's just, we were great before, right? Like, our grade was great, but like, now it's just, like, always just like amazing.

Speaker 9 And you're 35?

Speaker 9 34. 34, and she's 29.

Speaker 8 Yeah.

Speaker 9 I definitely think

Speaker 9 who I was in my early 20s compared to now, I mean, oh, it's night and day. I don't think that anyone could have prepared me for the level of growing, progressing, changing.
I mean, I even took

Speaker 9 steps back. Like, I reverted back probably around my 28 to 30.
It was like, yeah, I thought I was growing and then I was like, okay, wait, no.

Speaker 9 And now that I'm 32, I just have a completely different outlook than even just two years ago or three years ago. So I can't imagine what that did for you guys.

Speaker 8 Yeah. And like, we,

Speaker 8 it like 2020 literally, like, I was, like, I, I, like, we had talked about, like, I was in probably the lowest place of my entire life, like dirt naps being wanted to be taken, like, all the time.

Speaker 8 And so,

Speaker 8 and it was like a journey for me too. And, and, like, you know, my past relationships.

Speaker 8 So, like, the first two years of mine and Leah's relationships, I was unlearning such toxic behavior from my past relationships that, like, I was giving to her that she didn't deserve.

Speaker 8 So, like, there was just a lot like in the, in that beginning.

Speaker 8 And then when 2020 hit it was just like like everything just felt like wrong right like i was having a fallout with my sister i was having like you know figuring out things with my parents me and leo were like on the brink of just like breaking up forever um

Speaker 8 and then like all of that was happening right when like things kind of happened with you so there was just it was easier to step away than it was to try to figure anything else out because like i had had no, like, no fight left in me for myself.

Speaker 8 So, like, how do I have a fight left in me for anyone else if, like, I didn't even care about my own life, right?

Speaker 9 But I was in the same place. So, I think that's why I, like,

Speaker 9 I never knew if I should reach out or how to reach out or how to even reconcile. Like,

Speaker 9 I don't think I ever came fully to terms with the fact that we weren't friends anymore. Like, I don't think I ever fully accepted that.

Speaker 9 Like, I just knew that you weren't a part of my life, but I don't think I actually,

Speaker 9 I don't know. It was such a weird, because I was in such a weird place, and I just, I don't know, I thought that we would have worked out whatever it was that we were, you and I were dealing with.

Speaker 8 I think it's hard because there wasn't like one, there wasn't, like, a huge, like, blowout fight where we disrespected.

Speaker 8 Yeah, but it wasn't like we were disrespecting each other. It wasn't like we were like,

Speaker 8 you know, like, I betrayed your trust or like, I betrayed you, or like, you know, you

Speaker 8 like hurt someone in my life, or like, you, you know, it was just like we had an odd disagreement, like, and not for nothing.

Speaker 8 Like, we would, our friendship probably wouldn't have lasted through that anyway, because

Speaker 8 I held so, like, 20, I know that like politics is a difficult discussion for a lot of people, but like my

Speaker 8 outlook in 2016 and 2020 isn't who I am like now.

Speaker 8 I still obviously have the same views as I did, but like, I held so much hate so much hate back then that like it like destroyed me as like a person and so like I now cope with things differently and and like conversations differently and differences differently than I ever would have then the political conversation wasn't what

Speaker 8 broke us up

Speaker 8 I mean that was just that

Speaker 8 almost back but that was just like a like the cherry on the like I just don't don't have time for this. Like, I don't have time for myself.
Like, I don't have time for this. Like, there was just shit.

Speaker 8 And there was shit before that, right? Like,

Speaker 8 I mean, you know, like anyone that's involved or close to you in your life, like, recognizes

Speaker 8 even like the, like, the toxicness around you. Not saying like you personally, but like your interactions with.

Speaker 8 like your children's fathers, like things like that, your friends that you're having falling outs with, like the arguments that like you have with people, like that's a lot of weight to carry as for anyone, right?

Speaker 8 Like that's a lot of weight to carry for you. And I think for me,

Speaker 8 I was able to carry the weight of that for so long. But like in that moment of our separation, like, again, I didn't even, like, I didn't have a will to live.

Speaker 9 So how was I supposed to care about well, I think too, before that was like the sleepover at your house with everyone. We got into the little thing.

Speaker 8 Yeah.

Speaker 9 And then we also got into

Speaker 8 whenever that person

Speaker 9 whenever the yeah

Speaker 9 whenever that person came to visit you and then like she ran back to me and told me what you were saying and then i was just like this yeah i don't know if we have two different like

Speaker 9 perceptions of like what our friendship is or who we are or if they're like yeah i have been guilty of holding on to resentments from people that i'm friends with and then like it all like one thing is the straw that breaks the camel's back and then all of the things that I held on to the resentment and everything else and all the things I've been keeping in my back pocket kind of spill out and I feel like that's what happened with us like that's yeah what was going on and I think I we were set up for failure too right like we were young and immature of just like letting people

Speaker 8 like outside conversations with people like fuel

Speaker 8 our relationship, right? Like hearing what people were saying to me about what I should be expecting from you and then people telling you of like

Speaker 9 the same person that told you what to expect from me was coming back to me and telling me what to expect.

Speaker 8 We were getting played by a bunch of people.

Speaker 9 But why was that happening? Like, was it because we didn't care to like keep quality people around us, or was it like us being immature? What, what, like, what is that?

Speaker 8 I just think, like, I think that was just the nature of the people that were around you. And like, I wasn't quality people around me anymore.
I know.

Speaker 8 And, like, I wasn't used to that because, like, my home friends are different than the friends and relationships I had made with you. Right.
Right. Like, and I, and

Speaker 8 like, there just wasn't like a

Speaker 8 like we had, we were set up for failure, right? And, like, obviously, like,

Speaker 8 just like the world around you, like, isn't fair of just the position that you get put in, like, quite often of people using you, right?

Speaker 9 People that I think are like rock solid, the first thing they do when we have a fallout is go to the internet. And I know

Speaker 9 you never did that.

Speaker 8 No. And I mean, I did see.

Speaker 9 I did see high.

Speaker 8 That was a while after, though.

Speaker 9 But you didn't say anything else. So, like, whatever.

Speaker 8 I'll let it go. Right.

Speaker 8 But right after, I got tabloid after tabloid after tabloid in my DMs. Like, are you willing to sell your story?

Speaker 8 And like, I just, it never was worth it to me because, like, that's not why I was friends with you. Right.
Like, I wasn't friends with you to get my 15 minutes of fame.

Speaker 9 You like attention, but not.

Speaker 8 Yeah. And we talked about this the first time we talked.
I said, two truths can be the same. Like, I can love and care for you as a friend, and I can also like attention.

Speaker 9 But you would like attention with or without me, and that's the difference: is that the other people they like the attention they're getting with me, and then when they don't have it anymore, they quickly are like, Oh, I can go, because I'll tell you what,

Speaker 9 wife, she reached out to me after they sold or did whatever they did. I don't know if they sold it, I don't know if they gave away it for free, all that information.

Speaker 9 She turned around and texted my phone and said that she misses me. And I literally text her back.
I said, Get the fuck out of my iMessages.

Speaker 9 Because once you sell me out on the internet, whether you sell me, like you sell me out, or you just say something on the internet, I never look back. Yeah, and you never did that.

Speaker 9 And that's why I think I never fully accepted that we would not be friends again for the rest of our lives.

Speaker 8 Yeah. And I mean, we're here now.
But it was funny because when I called you, I was like, listen, I talked some shit the past four years, and

Speaker 8 I don't want it coming up now. And me having to explain myself.
So if like we're going to be friends, we're leaving the past four or five years behind us.

Speaker 9 No, but so when I told, because I obviously updated Taylor on everything. Yeah.
Because she was the one that told me about your dad.

Speaker 8 Yeah.

Speaker 9 I went back to her and I was like, you know, Becky called me and she told me that she talked shit to the, you know, so-and-so.

Speaker 9 And I, and she was like, wow, like, that's actually impressive that she, because I think you made a good point when you said, like, if we're going to try to like rekindle any sort of friendship or acquaintanceship or anything,

Speaker 9 why would you want to take a step back? Like, those people could come forward and be like, well, Becky said this, this, and this.

Speaker 9 Well, I know that she said that, that, and that, but we we weren't friends at the time and she was probably hurt and mad and whatever else i already know that so if i didn't know that and then i found out i'm like try to become friends again then it's like okay let's just not even be friends again so i sure and i respect that like i just feel like it takes balls to do that and you didn't have to do that and you did so to me

Speaker 9 it just it didn't

Speaker 9 It didn't matter that whatever you said over the past four years doesn't matter to me. You didn't go public with it.
So I don't give a fuck.

Speaker 9 And whatever you said in a text message to so-and-so is not my fucking business.

Speaker 9 It's not. Like, I don't care.
I don't, I don't.

Speaker 8 Yeah. And even if you, honestly, even if you saw anything I said, it wouldn't be like a

Speaker 9 like a game changer. Nah.

Speaker 8 Like it wasn't even. It wasn't that bad? Nah.
Oh, okay. Yeah.

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Speaker 9 What have you said about me, Zach?

Speaker 8 Oh.

Speaker 8 But yeah, that's, I mean,

Speaker 8 yeah, yeah. I just like, there's just no need for

Speaker 8 me. I don't hold on to anything.
I'm just like, you know, I'm just like a different, I'm different than I used to be.

Speaker 9 But you were just such a big part of my life and my kids' lives that

Speaker 8 I missed, I'm like, no offense to your other kids, but like Isaac,

Speaker 8 I don't even know half of them, so, which is crazy. It's a true story.

Speaker 8 Isaac holds such a special place in my heart that like, because he was like a nephew to me, right?

Speaker 9 Like, well, he was very apprehensive about us getting back together. Really? Yeah, he was very apprehensive.
He was like, Mom, I don't know if like you should do that.

Speaker 9 He didn't even know the story. And he was just like, because I tell him that.
I'm like,

Speaker 9 if you guys fall out, like, you have to be really careful who you like trust again. For sure.
And then I told him, I said, listen, I said, she called me. I said, we had a really great conversation.

Speaker 9 She told me she talked shit, which most people would never admit until the day they die. And he was like, oh, okay.
So then he felt better about it.

Speaker 9 And then I told him that I was coming here with you. He actually wanted to come tonight, but he's with his dad.
So

Speaker 9 I love that, Kim. So that's when he followed you back on Instagram.

Speaker 8 I like cried. I was like, I'm just, I spent so much time with him and like, so much new time.
So quality time. Like, yeah.
And I'm just like,

Speaker 8 like, that he, I think I look at him like I look at Piper, right? Like my niece. Like, I'm just like,

Speaker 8 I just want to be able to.

Speaker 9 He really used Becky right now. Yeah.
Like the things that he's going through in his life, I just feel like,

Speaker 9 I mean, I can help as much as I can help, but I think that you

Speaker 9 understand him on a different level than I ever could. Because

Speaker 8 yeah, I hope to hang out with him. I hope to...
Whatever.

Speaker 8 I think it's nice.

Speaker 8 I think we're both in a place where, like,

Speaker 8 there's

Speaker 8 like, it's like a why not type of situation.

Speaker 9 Like, why, like, why wouldn't we rekindle it?

Speaker 8 Because we had a great friend. I mean, like, you know, like, we

Speaker 8 vibe very well together of just, like, having fun and enjoying.

Speaker 9 Like, wait, do you remember?

Speaker 8 This will come out after

Speaker 9 the live. And so, when this airs as a podcast, like, I don't care if people know.

Speaker 8 Hold on a sec, Kim.

Speaker 9 I'm embarrassed to ask if you remember this.

Speaker 9 You're just like a flirt in general, like, by nature, for sure.

Speaker 8 Flirt with everyone. Yeah.

Speaker 9 In New York. We were in New York at a hotel.
It was like me, you, Wendy, God,

Speaker 9 probably bone.

Speaker 9 And I looked at you and I said, Why aren't, why did we never try to be together? Do you remember what you said to me?

Speaker 8 Probably something about it being too easy or something.

Speaker 9 Get out of my, get out of the room. That's exactly what you said.
You were like, Kale, you are not a challenge.

Speaker 9 Do you remember that? I do.

Speaker 8 Yeah.

Speaker 8 And I was like,

Speaker 8 way to humble me. Way to fucking humble me.
But also, that is also really funny. That whole, I was just telling them before was that, um,

Speaker 8 so it all started because I don't know if you remember this. I don't.
You were pregnant with Lux

Speaker 8 and you didn't want the news finding out. Like, right.
You didn't want TMC, well, whoever finding out, right? TMC.

Speaker 8 And so you were like, Becky, people think we're dating. Do you care if we milk this?

Speaker 8 So that

Speaker 8 no one finds out that I'm pregnant. Yeah.
And so when the tabloid started coming, like that would, like,

Speaker 8 we never denied it. We never spoke about it.
Like, we still to this day have never publicly talked about it. Like, every, and it's so fucking funny.
Am I allowed to curse? Yeah.

Speaker 8 It's so funny because like

Speaker 8 people will ask me and I'll be like, no, like, no, we didn't like hook up our date. And but I saw it once.
Yeah, but I say it in like such a guilty way by accident that no one believes me anymore.

Speaker 9 I honestly think when we get out on stage tonight and they and we like address this, I don't know.

Speaker 8 No one's gonna believe us.

Speaker 8 I don't think that people like would believe it.

Speaker 9 Well, and do you know how weird it was to explain who you are to Elijah? Because Elijah and I have been together for two and a half or three years.

Speaker 9 Trying to explain to him who you are.

Speaker 9 Nobody gets it because unless you were around us while we were like

Speaker 9 the for 10 years before we fell out, you don't get it. Nobody Nobody gets it.
Yeah.

Speaker 9 So like trying to explain he was like, so when I was telling him about what we were doing and like for the haters, like the plan for that and everything, he was like, who is this?

Speaker 9 Like you can't explain, like you just had to be there. Yeah.

Speaker 8 It was funny because I thought when you were just about to say, do you remember that time when we were in New York when

Speaker 8 we were walking down the street and the dude jumped out of the car, butt-ass naked? Oh my God.

Speaker 9 With his weeder out. And it was flocked.
Zach, you would have loved it. It was so big.

Speaker 8 It was so big. Yeah.

Speaker 9 No, he gets out of the driver's seat, stark ass naked, like literally no.

Speaker 8 No shoes on and socks.

Speaker 9 There was no, there was no boxers.

Speaker 9 We had pictures of it.

Speaker 8 His hangbang, it was out.

Speaker 9 Pictures of it. No, we literally have, we have to find that one.

Speaker 8 I didn't have to.

Speaker 9 No, it's so,

Speaker 9 I had never seen a penis that big in my life. It literally almost touched his kneecap.
It was soft.

Speaker 8 Wow.

Speaker 9 I was sick. I was like, what in the fuck? And we were just like taking videos of him and he never said, don't do that.
Next baby daddy.

Speaker 9 it was shook do you remember that when was that what year do you think that was and what were we doing in new york no playo

Speaker 8 i think we were there for a reunion

Speaker 9 a reunion oh okay because you've been to how many teen mom reunions do you think you've been to with me three that's it

Speaker 8 four

Speaker 9 oh i went on book tour with you People sent me pictures of that and I was dying and people remember you like chilling with Lincoln while I was on the book tour. Yeah.

Speaker 8 Would you come on another book tour?

Speaker 8 Yeah.

Speaker 8 Okay.

Speaker 9 Should we write a book together?

Speaker 8 I would love to write a book. I think I'm pretty good at writing a book.
You absolutely write. Well not like the writing the book part, but like the concept behind it.
Okay.

Speaker 9 I'll edit it because your grammar sometimes is a little crazy.

Speaker 8 It's so bad.

Speaker 9 It's like you got a master's degree.

Speaker 8 I get you. Yeah.

Speaker 9 So you and Leah, you got engaged, you got married.

Speaker 8 We got married this year.

Speaker 8 Yeah.

Speaker 8 Our wedding was beautiful.

Speaker 9 So So did you go on a honeymoon? Are you going to go on a honeymoon or is like the IVF the honeymoon?

Speaker 8 The IVF is the honeymoon.

Speaker 9 So is she also doing IVF at the same time? She is. Same sperm donor.
So they'll be

Speaker 9 potentially could be fraternal twins or having them like short, like a short space apart.

Speaker 9 Yeah. Possible that you guys could have not fraternal twins, but they could still be in the same grade.

Speaker 8 Yeah, because, but we're doing co-IVF.

Speaker 8 So like we're each carrying each other's

Speaker 8 egg, same donor.

Speaker 9 So yeah, like. I want to talk about this on like tomato.

Speaker 8 Yeah, we'll yeah, we'll go into more detail about it. What's crazy is that you've almost had enough kids to count the years.

Speaker 9 That we've been friends.

Speaker 8 That we've not been friends. That we've not been friends since I've been gone.

Speaker 9 And truly,

Speaker 9 two came for one. So three.

Speaker 9 So four. Creed?

Speaker 8 You had four kids in five years we haven't been friends.

Speaker 9 No, four.

Speaker 8 I've had four kids. That's what I just said.
Oh, I thought you said three. No.

Speaker 8 And that's crazy.

Speaker 9 Well, I didn't mean to.

Speaker 9 It was the accident.

Speaker 8 He slipped on the dick.

Speaker 8 Don't we all do that? How do you, I mean, how do you accidentally have four kids?

Speaker 9 Well, one was twins, so two were twins.

Speaker 8 That was on. I can't believe you have a girl.

Speaker 9 I also can't, when you meet her, she's insane. Like, remember the time that you said that we didn't need another kale running around? I dare not.
No, she's crazy in the bath. Like, she's so.

Speaker 8 She's crazy. Yeah, she's crazy.
It's just it's really hard.

Speaker 8 Like, it's crazy to me that you have that many more kids because I was so involved with your others and other kids' lives that, like, I'm so out of touch with your current reality.

Speaker 8 You know what I mean?

Speaker 9 Like, I think it's like more chill than anyone thinks. Like, people think like it is chaos, but like, it's KL chaos, so it's not that chaotic.
Do you know what I mean?

Speaker 8 Yeah, it's like I'm like,

Speaker 8 yeah, like I still think, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 9 Um, okay, so you're doing the reciprocal co-IVF. Yeah.
You guys are good. Okay.
Update me if you're comfortable with it. Um and the I think, did you ever share the journey with your brother-in-law?

Speaker 9 Like how he was paralyzed? They're divorced.

Speaker 10 They're divorced. They are.

Speaker 9 But you are on you are on good terms with Alex, your sister?

Speaker 8 I am, yeah.

Speaker 8 She's my best friend.

Speaker 9 Is she coming tonight?

Speaker 8 No. She lives in Florida now.

Speaker 9 Oh, are you serious? Yeah. Oh my God.

Speaker 8 Is she okay with the hurricane?

Speaker 8 She said they're in Zone D, so they're not in Lynn. Like, they're not close to the water.
Okay. Yeah, so she's remarried.
She married her high school sweetheart. Wow.

Speaker 8 She's great. My sister, Kim, is coming to.
Oh, I know her. Yeah.
Love her.

Speaker 9 I think I've met every single

Speaker 8 of them except LJ, I think.

Speaker 9 Well, he's the one that lived in New York.

Speaker 8 No, that's Justin.

Speaker 9 So when, why didn't I meet LJ?

Speaker 8 He lives in Jersey. He's the oldest.

Speaker 9 Did I just like never meet him? Yeah.

Speaker 9 I met your mom. I met some of your nieces.
I think I met all three of your nieces actually.

Speaker 9 I don't think that people even know how inner, like

Speaker 9 close that we were. Maybe they do.
I think people do.

Speaker 9 No, because I can't, it's hard to explain it to people when they ask me. It's like I knew your whole family, so like I don't.

Speaker 8 Yeah.

Speaker 9 It's not like we, it was just me and you. Yeah.
Also, how does Leah feel about us reconnecting? Is she okay with it?

Speaker 8 Yeah, she's okay. I mean,

Speaker 8 Leah is a

Speaker 8 sweetheart. She just, you know, just told me to be careful of just like, she just saw me go through a lot of hurt.
And like, any partner,

Speaker 8 you know, I do it with her and friends that she's, you know,

Speaker 8 she was like,

Speaker 8 you know, I love you and I care about you. I just don't want to see you hurt.
So I was like, yeah, makes sense.

Speaker 8 She's like, not, no, do not be friends with her.

Speaker 9 I think that's what people think about me.

Speaker 8 What? They're like,

Speaker 9 because of all the fallouts.

Speaker 9 But it's not, I, yeah, but like, I'm just here to say it's not always my fault.

Speaker 8 Your, your situation is like very interesting because, like, of

Speaker 8 your life.

Speaker 8 Like, people gain from being friends with you, right? So, like, so it's a very hard thing to decipher of like what is real and what is not. And so like,

Speaker 8 even if they are real friendships, there's never not going to be a doubt of that being a real friendship from your end, just because

Speaker 8 you've had so many people come through your life that

Speaker 8 like have used you as a friend.

Speaker 9 Right. Well, I'm sad if Leah thinks that.
We're not going to make it.

Speaker 8 No, she doesn't think that.

Speaker 9 Well, she doesn't, we don't follow each other on Instagram, which makes me sad.

Speaker 8 So why don't you follow her?

Speaker 9 Because I wanted to test, I wanted to do a pulse show.

Speaker 8 She likes you. She just doesn't want me to get hurt, which is fair.
She just says, like, you know.

Speaker 9 How does she feel about us having made out once?

Speaker 8 I don't know.

Speaker 9 Does it bother her at all?

Speaker 8 Why would that bother her?

Speaker 9 I'm just making sure, you know what I mean?

Speaker 8 You know what worries me?

Speaker 9 What? That I'm going to try to make out with you?

Speaker 8 No, no.

Speaker 9 I would never disrespect you or Leah like that.

Speaker 8 No, you know what worries me about becoming friends with you again?

Speaker 9 No, I don't. Tell me.

Speaker 8 Is that.

Speaker 9 So are we not friends now?

Speaker 8 No, we are. But like, it hasn't been very public yet.

Speaker 8 You know what I mean? We haven't been friends since 2020, right?

Speaker 8 And then

Speaker 8 even like before that, what?

Speaker 9 2020, like January. January, February, 2020.

Speaker 8 So

Speaker 8 Leah and I broke up for a month or two.

Speaker 8 Like two years into our relationship, three years into our relationship, you were kind of around for that.

Speaker 8 And I had my own journey of

Speaker 8 some one-night stands throughout that process.

Speaker 8 Men or women?

Speaker 9 Women. Okay, I wasn't sure.

Speaker 8 And so what scares me is that like when I speak about Leah, I say we've been together for eight years.

Speaker 8 very like confidently because we have. We don't talk about the intermission.

Speaker 9 We don't like... You're afraid those people are going to come forward.

Speaker 8 Yeah, and they're going to like come forward and be like, that girl's a cheater.

Speaker 9 No, because we'll just explain.

Speaker 8 Well, yeah. And Leah knows it too.
It's not like I hid that from her.

Speaker 9 So then what are we worried about?

Speaker 8 I don't know. I don't want people to think I'm a cheater.

Speaker 9 So you're not a cheater. You've never known that.
I've literally never been, as long as I've known you. Yeah.

Speaker 9 And I also don't want people to think that like our friendship or me specifically is disrespecting your relationship and your marriage in any way because I just think it's like we just have a good time and we're funny.

Speaker 8 Yeah, I wouldn't put, I wouldn't put myself in a situation that would be a good idea. So, I don't want people to think that I wouldn't say that I said, disrespect my marriage.

Speaker 9 No, that's, I didn't, to be honest, Becky, I didn't know if you'd ever get married.

Speaker 8 I didn't know if I would ever get married either.

Speaker 9 You've been good luck, Chuck, for

Speaker 9 our entire friendship before we fell out. And so that I was like, damn, like, what is good?

Speaker 8 Yeah.

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Speaker 9 Um, when you were talking about the people coming forward, like while you guys were broken up or whatever,

Speaker 9 that's kind of what

Speaker 9 I thought might happen

Speaker 9 about like our friendship, like people coming forward, and like one specific person I have in mind coming forward and being like, Oh, well, she said this, this, and this.

Speaker 9 Yeah, it's like I already know, yeah. So, I just want that to be like, I want to make that very clear.

Speaker 8 I'm not like concerned because, like it wasn't what you said was not.

Speaker 9 Yeah.

Speaker 8 It was just like

Speaker 8 it wasn't the things I said because I was conscious about that. It was the things that I allowed other people to say.

Speaker 9 Oh, I don't care about that. You can't control what people say.

Speaker 8 Yeah, but like

Speaker 8 even though we weren't friends, like it like makes me feel uncomfortable. Like

Speaker 8 it was almost as if we were friends, right? Like I don't like hearing people talk shit about people I care about. And so I don't know.
Past is past. I'm not, it is what it is.

Speaker 9 Well, I just want us to be prepared if it does happen.

Speaker 8 That's all. That's all.

Speaker 8 United front.

Speaker 9 Just like I tell my kids.

Speaker 8 Yeah.

Speaker 9 We're a united front. I hate his guts, but united.

Speaker 8 Yeah. So it's just, and it's also funny because coming back into

Speaker 8 your life now, you have different relationships with all of your baby dads.

Speaker 9 So can I update you? I would love it. So Joe and I do not have a good relationship.

Speaker 9 We get along absolutely when necessary.

Speaker 9 Javi and I are email only.

Speaker 9 We're very cordial, very civil. And then Chris and I, we also only communicate through the talking parents app.
So we don't communicate via email, text, calls, nothing.

Speaker 9 So it's like all like, no, no, no. And you're laughing, but like, this is a best case scenario.

Speaker 8 No, I'm just laughing because I don't like really talking to anyone. And you have to communicate with

Speaker 8 four or five. What is it?

Speaker 9 Four or five. if it's three and a half, because Elijah, he just doesn't talk by nature.

Speaker 8 So four people, like

Speaker 9 Elijah is sort of like Leah, but in male form, but but he's not as cute because like he's cute, but he's he just doesn't talk because he's just not like a social person, yeah. But like an angel.

Speaker 9 Do you know what I mean? Like Leah's an angel and Elijah is an angel, but he he just like I don't know if he's coming tonight. Oh, really? Yeah, I have no idea.
I don't think so.

Speaker 9 Because he was like, I'm not sure, if you forgot anything, I can't ship it. So I'm assuming that means he's not coming.
But like, also, we have seven kids. So it's fine.

Speaker 8 Um,

Speaker 9 outside of that, I'm trying to think. Uh, so he owns the house in front of me.
So we share a driveway. That's how I met him.

Speaker 9 But prior to that, without knowing, his uncle had been doing landscaping for me for like three years.

Speaker 9 So when I took him out to the house to where that I was building, I was like, hey, like, can you give me an estimate on what this would cost for like landscaping and stuff?

Speaker 9 And he was like, this looks really familiar. I think my nephew bought the house in front of you.
And I was like, oh, like, how old is he? And so, that's kind of what, how that transpired.

Speaker 9 Um, I'm trying to remember like when you're happy, yeah. I think simultaneously, I mean, obviously,

Speaker 9 what I meant by like the dad thing, the best case scenario is just that, like, we don't have communications and like there's no lines being blurred.

Speaker 9 I think overall, I wish that my, I had a better relationship with them for the kids' sake.

Speaker 9 But outside of that, I would say, like, things have never been better.

Speaker 9 I don't have a living nanny, despite what what people think.

Speaker 8 I'm going to get a living nanny.

Speaker 9 As you should. Okay, what were you saying? It was weird being in.

Speaker 8 No, I said it like feels so weird being in your presence, but like it also feels like I saw you yesterday. You know what I mean?

Speaker 9 Sort of like we picked up where we left off.

Speaker 8 For sure. But like, it's also like weird.
Like, it's like weird. But I don't know.

Speaker 9 Do we feel like we are the evolved versions of our friendship before, like the better versions of our friendship before.

Speaker 8 I don't know if that we've reached the level of a better friendship yet. No, no, no, I mean

Speaker 9 friends again. I mean, like, us as people were the better versions of ourselves before, but our friendship

Speaker 9 could be, I should say,

Speaker 9 would be the more evolved version of what it was.

Speaker 8 I think our friendship could be a more evolved

Speaker 8 version

Speaker 8 based on the people we are now.

Speaker 9 I would be lying if I said that I would not be sad if we don't end up like

Speaker 9 like being real friends again.

Speaker 8 I feel like we're on the right steps. Road to redemption, baby.

Speaker 9 Road to redemption with Kayla and Becky.

Speaker 9 So okay, let's go over the show really quick before we wrap this up. Okay.

Speaker 9 So

Speaker 9 I go out,

Speaker 9 introduce you. We'll do this in soundtrack too, but just like for you.
Yeah. I just want to know, like, are we going to have enough to talk about for the full 20 minutes?

Speaker 8 Like this segment?

Speaker 9 Like, are we, we're going to basically retalk about what we just talked about, like, but live. Yeah.
Are you open to if other things come up, like, we're okay to say them?

Speaker 9 Am I allowed to say that you slept with more men than me?

Speaker 8 Yeah.

Speaker 9 Do you think people are going to laugh?

Speaker 8 Yeah.

Speaker 9 I'm scared they're not going to.

Speaker 8 You've been doing this longer than I have. So like, I know, but this one's really different.
Yeah, but people think you're funny.

Speaker 8 Like you're like people think you're funny just in like general so like how you deliver things is funny.

Speaker 9 Okay. so,

Speaker 9 okay, and we also don't really know what's like some of the things we don't know. Like, we don't know the true and false that are gonna be there.
We don't know the trivia questions.

Speaker 9 We don't know, like, there's things we don't know, which leaves room for humor. Yeah, I'm just nervous because every show has been so different that I'm so nervous every single time.

Speaker 9 And, like, my biggest thing is, I know I'm not a comedian, but I want people to laugh. And if they don't laugh, to me, is a sign that they're not having a good time.

Speaker 8 Do people laugh at your other shows?

Speaker 9 Yeah, we've had a really good time at my other shows, but I'm just scared because this one is so so different.

Speaker 8 Yeah, but it might be like welcome different. Like there are going to be moments of laughter toward like, it's going to start in a more serious like fashion, right?

Speaker 9 Do you want to see how I started my other show, my last show? Sure. I need to show you because I just got the video back on the car, in the car on the way here.

Speaker 9 And Chandler thought it was the funniest thing ever. Chandler's the videographer, so in case anyone's listening to this and wondering who the fuck I'm talking about.
Go Chandler. Chandler is so funny.

Speaker 9 He's so funny. I truly, the driver that I had on the way to Philly was so fucking funny.
He also had six daughters and one son.

Speaker 8 Opposite. I said,

Speaker 9 does Grace?

Speaker 8 He have

Speaker 8 five,

Speaker 8 four baby moms.

Speaker 9 Well, we didn't get that far.

Speaker 9 So it's possible. He also said that his parents had six sons and one daughter.
So the opposite of him, but the same as me. So I was like, so basically I'm your long-lost daughter, it sounds like.

Speaker 9 Okay, but you have to see this fucking Dallas. This is how we open the show.

Speaker 8 Miss Demeana on the floor, pretty cool.

Speaker 9 How much pain in your works don't mind that so snatched on the

Speaker 9 kick down in Dallas?

Speaker 9 Real out of my

Speaker 8 tennis.

Speaker 8 Dick down in Dallas.

Speaker 8 Yeah, I think that's great.

Speaker 9 That singer responded.

Speaker 8 The original singer responded. I would like to see you.

Speaker 9 No, but like, I don't remember what we're, what are we coming out to? You're coming out to I Kiss the Girl. Yeah.
So should we just start singing it?

Speaker 9 Like, should I sing it in the mic while you're coming out? Yeah.

Speaker 8 I'm just figuring I'm a lesbian again.

Speaker 9 We're, we, I've always been. I've always been.
It doesn't just like go away, Becky. Okay.

Speaker 9 Okay, so we'll do this show. We'll go through everything in soundtrack.
If we change anything, we can change it in soundtrack.

Speaker 8 Yeah, because we can speak to you. I just want it to be a good time.
So we can speak to, like, first 20 minutes is us talking, right?

Speaker 8 We probably shouldn't go into much detail about like assumptions people have made of us in that 20 minutes because those are going to come up in the true true or false. Okay.
You know what I mean?

Speaker 8 So like.

Speaker 8 We'll speak through our separation. We'll catch up on life of like where we're at.
Because like

Speaker 8 we can both, you can ask more questions about, like, Leah, about my dad, about what, like, whatever it is.

Speaker 9 In the beginning,

Speaker 9 okay, separate from, okay, so, like, I'm gonna introduce you. So, it's like, I come out, I don't remember what song I come out to, I'll figure that out at sound check.

Speaker 8 Introduce, I'm gonna say, like, the OGs will know, like, yeah, when my special guest comes out, I might like say something to the audience and be like, hey, like, what's your name?

Speaker 8 And then I'm gonna, we're gonna hug or we're not gonna hug. Yeah, I'm gonna grab your face.

Speaker 9 Like, I'm gonna hit you.

Speaker 9 Wait, you are in the audience.

Speaker 8 I know.

Speaker 8 Oh my god.

Speaker 9 No, I have to get in this right frame of mind. Okay, time out.
I'm gonna say, are you all ready to have a good time?

Speaker 9 Does anybody, like, does anybody object to having a good time? Yeah. You stand up.

Speaker 8 And I say, I object. And then they're gonna start playing I Kiss the Girl.
And I'm gonna come up on stage. We're gonna hug, and then I'm gonna grab your face like I'm gonna kiss you.
Okay.

Speaker 8 But I'm not. I might kiss your cheek.
I'll go.

Speaker 9 Okay. What if I turn my head?

Speaker 9 That would be an accident because I'm awkward. You know that.
Yeah.

Speaker 9 Okay. And then.

Speaker 8 And then you'll be like, this is Becky. You guys might remember.
If you don't, get the fuck out.

Speaker 9 I want to sit on the left side of the stage. So like, if we're up there, it's the left.
Like, if we're facing the crowd, I'm going to go.

Speaker 8 We can even argue about what side to sit on, like, banter about it.

Speaker 9 People are looking at the stage, you're on the right.

Speaker 9 Yes, exactly. Okay, so.

Speaker 9 That's a wrap on this conversation and we will finish the conversation on stage.

Speaker 8 We're going to go live. Yeah, and then we'll have hopefully some more conversations after.

Speaker 9 Sounds good to me.

Speaker 9 Becky and I wanted to get on this recording because we had a pretty emotional reunion, at least on my end, for

Speaker 9 our live show the other night.

Speaker 8 I cried and she didn't.

Speaker 9 No, I cried and she didn't.

Speaker 8 Yeah.

Speaker 8 I'm on a lot. I'm like, I just feel like I'm on a lot of hormone shots right now, or not hormone technically, like shots for IVF stuff.
like, I'm at baseline a very emotional person, like

Speaker 8 cry like that. I think the shots have like leveled me out, where like, if they're kind of taking them away a little bit.

Speaker 9 No, I think that makes sense. That's fair.

Speaker 8 Because I was also like, but I also was like so nervous. Like, I was like shaking.

Speaker 9 No, we both were like, both of, we were like trembling.

Speaker 8 We were like trembling. I was like, oh, God.

Speaker 9 After the show, I flew out to LA. Becky went back home to New Jersey.
And so we're recording a little catch-up after the show. How do you think it went?

Speaker 8 Much needed because, listen, that was

Speaker 8 one of the best nights of my entire life.

Speaker 9 No, I said, I typed that in my caption when I posted, and I was like, I don't want my kids to feel like they were less than because, like, obviously, they're the best days of my life, my life.

Speaker 9 But that was one of the best nights of my entire life.

Speaker 8 My exact thoughts were: How can I say this without discrediting my wedding? I just had

Speaker 8 the best night of my life, like all around. But like, I haven't felt like first, it was so nice to just be back in that element with you, even just to be back around you, right?

Speaker 8 Like we have a vibe around us that like I feel like only really comes out, or at least for myself, that really comes out when I'm with you.

Speaker 8 And

Speaker 8 the

Speaker 8 element of like engaging with the crowd and like talking and just like yapping back and forth. Like, I felt so alive.
Like, I felt like the best version of myself. You know what I mean?

Speaker 9 But you know what? We are both individually the best versions of ourselves. I feel like we did so much growing over the past five years.

Speaker 9 And I just feel like if it happened any sooner, it might not have been as good as it was.

Speaker 8 No.

Speaker 9 Like, I personally, I think out of the almost five years that we didn't talk, I did the most growth in the past two.

Speaker 9 So I know that your life and you as an individual got better at the end of 2020 and your life kind of went like up from there.

Speaker 9 But for me, I can't honestly say the same. I think for me, it's been the last two years.

Speaker 9 Probably I would say like right after I had Rio, my depression, I don't know if it was like the hormones or what it was. And I've been pretty open about my depression when I was pregnant with Rio.

Speaker 9 For some reason, when I got pregnant with the twins, I don't know if it like balanced out the hormones that were fucked up when I was pregnant with Rio.

Speaker 9 I'm not really sure, but I would say like the past two years, like my pregnancy with the twins and then after the twins has have absolutely been like my best like era. You know what I mean?

Speaker 9 So I just feel like even before that, I don't think that we would have had such an incredible night. And I will say that I'm I am a little bit insecure about how Leah feels about me.

Speaker 9 Like I'm still insecure about it because I know, like, I'm gonna cry.

Speaker 9 I know how important she is to you. And so, I like, it'll make me so sad if she's like

Speaker 9 not really a fan of me or like coming back into your life.

Speaker 8 No, so

Speaker 8 I,

Speaker 8 and you know, I value Leah

Speaker 8 more than anything in this world. Like, yeah, of course.

Speaker 8 Stop getting emotional because then I'm like,

Speaker 8 I love her beyond like anything. I respect her.
I value her. I would never cross any lines that like she didn't feel comfortable with.
And so obviously with like

Speaker 8 us, there's a lot that comes with our friendship. There's a lot of speculations.
There's a lot of like.

Speaker 8 Just like how we interact too. Like how we interact is is like much different than how I interact with like my other friends.

Speaker 8 And so Leah and I had like a bunch of conversations around this because I wouldn't have even like, I guess there's two separate parts, right?

Speaker 8 Like our friendship is one thing that wouldn't have to do with like the public eye type of thing.

Speaker 8 And like any good partner, Leah was just like, I love you. You are a forgiving person.
I am not. I watched you like very hurt from the end of your friendship.

Speaker 8 And I just want you to be careful like I don't want to see you hurt again

Speaker 8 Which is valid, right? Like, yeah, I mean we you just talked to her Leah's a fucking sweetheart like she is

Speaker 8 an angel

Speaker 8 Yeah,

Speaker 8 so she respects me and my decisions and has no

Speaker 8 like

Speaker 8 Reason that I shouldn't like be friends with you again. She's just a

Speaker 8 I love you so much. Like I just don't want to see you hurt.
Even when and then the other

Speaker 8 the other side of it being like the public side right like I didn't have to come your life and just automatically come back into the public eye as well I just like attention so why wouldn't I right like

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Speaker 9 I mean, I just, I think Isaac felt this. I mean, obviously, Isaac doesn't know the same details that like you and I know or or Leah knows or Kristen knows, right? Like he doesn't know.

Speaker 9 He has no idea why we weren't friends. Like he truly, none of my kids do, but Isaac was like, I just don't know.
And we said this on the podcast, right? Like we

Speaker 9 don't know how it's going to go. And we, neither one of us wants to get hurt.
And our loved ones don't want to see the other one get hurt. And, you know, he was apprehensive about it.
But I think.

Speaker 9 He was on board.

Speaker 9 I texted him last night because, or was it last night? I think it might have been yesterday, like after we talked, told him to pull it up. He asked me how the show went.

Speaker 9 And I said, Becky said, the hardest part of our friendship breakup was losing you. And he said, and he said, I'll never forget her.
And he put this little emoji.

Speaker 9 And I was like, oh, this is going to be a little, an emotional reunion at some point.

Speaker 8 I will cry when I see him.

Speaker 9 He's just, I don't know.

Speaker 9 I just,

Speaker 9 he's like our two person, your personality and my personality, and a child.

Speaker 8 Like, you know what I mean?

Speaker 9 Because you're like outgoing and fun and all the things. And I, so is he, but I'm also an introvert, but he's all, I don't know.
But I'm just glad that we reconnected. I'm glad that it was,

Speaker 9 I don't know. It's, it's like we picked up where we left off, but two completely different people.
And I just, I love that. And I, I want to make sure that we do, we take care of our friendship and

Speaker 9 put what we need to put into the friendship, if that makes sense, so that we don't make the mistakes. And I'm actually not worried about it.
Like, I really feel like we're different people now.

Speaker 8 Yeah, I think that's why I'm not worried, is like

Speaker 8 it's not a part of my character anymore to like

Speaker 8 to be anyone other than like the best version of myself, right? Like, and be a good friend and be, like, communicate, like, hold on to those friendships. So, I'm not, I'm not worried about it.

Speaker 8 But, um, it was funny because when Leah and I were talking about the other side of stuff, right, you know doing this tour with you just allowing ourselves to be more public together her like biggest concern was she was like Becky what if like what if people are mean to you

Speaker 8 I mean it's a good point it's a valid point she's like what if people are mean to you and you're sad and she's like I don't like and I was just like Leah

Speaker 8 I was friends with Kaye. We were obviously friends for like 10 years.
And there was like a time in the early of our friendship that I, like, you have to navigate social media

Speaker 8 and like learn how to like pick and choose like what you read and what like goes on in there. But I just thought it was cute because she was like,

Speaker 9 I was cracking up because our TikToks that we made, if you guys haven't seen them yet, you can go over to my TikTok and we made some TikToks. And one of actually both of them are,

Speaker 9 I mean, I, I didn't, I knew people would be excited for us, but I didn't think they would below. I mean, both combined, I think they're over 10 million views.
And I just like wasn't prepared for that.

Speaker 9 Like, I thought, like, slightly viral, maybe, but like, I didn't even know if we'd get a million, right? Because, like, it's been five years and so much has changed in five years.

Speaker 9 So I was like, do people remember her? Do they not remember her? I don't know. So, um, I was scrolling this morning and someone said, I can't stand Becky.
And I was like, oh, what's tea?

Speaker 9 Like, I was just trying to be funny. And you were like, bro, don't, what did you say? Don't egg them on or like, don't entertain.
Did you know that person or they're being a dick?

Speaker 8 No, yeah, I was just kidding.

Speaker 9 I was like, I'm like,

Speaker 8 there's probably like 500 comments, and there's only one negative comment. And Kale just entertains that comment.
Like, oh, what the dick

Speaker 8 give me the tape?

Speaker 9 Like, no, I did respond. I responded to a lot of positive ones because people were like,

Speaker 9 I posted myself and my feelings before I knocked, like, when I knocked on your door, and then I cut it off. Like, I didn't put anything else.
And people were like, Don't leave us on a cliffhanger.

Speaker 9 And I responded and I was like, Hey, like, I, we're gonna, I'm gonna post, you know, the part two next week. Um, so it'll be, you know, up today.

Speaker 8 It'll be up today?

Speaker 9 No, no, no, like when this airs, it'll be today.

Speaker 9 Your face was like, I'm not prepared.

Speaker 8 Yeah. Um, no, I, I, you sent that to me.

Speaker 8 I was doing something, so I saw a little later, and uh, it was so cute. It actually made me feel emotional.
I was like, this is like really smart.

Speaker 9 Smart?

Speaker 9 That was your reaction?

Speaker 8 Was this really smart? Oh, no, no, no. Right now, that was my reaction.
Oh,

Speaker 8 no.

Speaker 8 He was being really emotional. And I was like, oh, this is like,

Speaker 8 look at her.

Speaker 8 Look at us. Look at us.
Like,

Speaker 8 my hands open like

Speaker 8 a book.

Speaker 9 But I love that we're both book girlies. So that's exciting.
We have that in common. We both have tons of animals.

Speaker 8 We do, but the book thing I I just started reading.

Speaker 8 The past 15 years I've spent in the actually, no, 10 years, maybe even five.

Speaker 8 I've spent in the self-help realm. So I've only read like self-help books.

Speaker 8 And I picked up my first

Speaker 8 fiction. Is it non-fiction?

Speaker 9 I was going to say. Fiction.
Fiction book. Non-fiction is stuff that's true.

Speaker 8 Shout out to my best friend Spencer. He was like, Beck, you need to read this book.
I know the movies movies you like. You'll love this.
And so

Speaker 8 I read Fourth Wing, and I have read seven books in like a month just from that.

Speaker 9 I need you to join Goodreads, and we need to follow each other on Goodreads.

Speaker 8 I did follow you on Goodreads.

Speaker 9 Oh, you have a Goodreads.

Speaker 8 Can you send me your link? Yeah.

Speaker 9 No, I didn't send you some links.

Speaker 9 Your friend Ryan,

Speaker 9 yes, is one of my favorite people.

Speaker 9 I love him. No, like I want him to come on tour as like a hype person.
Like when I do tour in 2025, I want him to be the hype. Like I just love his energy.
He's just, I love him.

Speaker 8 Cale, do you know what he does for work?

Speaker 9 I saw that he like is a barber, maybe.

Speaker 8 No, he's a female hairdresser.

Speaker 8 Oh, so like

Speaker 8 you could take him on tour and he could do your hair on tour.

Speaker 8 Shut up.

Speaker 9 Hold on. Because

Speaker 9 let me go look at his thing. I followed him.
Hair, Harley, and hair.

Speaker 8 Hair and a Harley.

Speaker 9 Wait, but he's also a barber?

Speaker 8 He does more of females. He like he's not a bar.
Like, he'll do male hair, but he's like, his specialty is females. He grew up in the salon.
His uncle owns it.

Speaker 8 So he's, he grew up in that, in a, in like the salon world. So he's been doing it since he's 13.

Speaker 9 He's

Speaker 9 obsessed with him.

Speaker 8 Yeah.

Speaker 9 I'm actually cutting all my hair off when I get home from LA.

Speaker 8 Okay.

Speaker 8 That's a batter debate.

Speaker 8 Ryan also, Ryan, this, I said this at tour. Like, the biggest testament to who Ryan is is Ryan married Leah and I, and, like, we wouldn't have chosen just anyone to marry us.

Speaker 8 And then my best friend Spencer is getting married soon, and he's, Ryan's marrying them, too.

Speaker 9 So, like, wait, I know Spencer, don't I?

Speaker 8 Yes, you do.

Speaker 9 Hold on, I'm going to look because I am like trying to put the amount of people that I've met over the past couple months. I'm like, I don't know how I'm going to meet.
Like,

Speaker 9 we talk a lot on the other podcasts about like maintaining like relationships and friendships and all the things. And, like, I truly don't know how to maintain every single relationship.

Speaker 9 But, like, the more that I'm happy, the more I'm open-minded to entertaining other relationships. It's just like so fucking hard.
But I feel like I remember Spencer. So, hold on.

Speaker 8 He came to that dinner that someone jumped on the table okay

Speaker 9 oh I know Spencer you guys went on you guys just went to Mexico too

Speaker 8 for Spencer's bachelor party I'm in Spencer okay yeah okay I have to give a speech that I still have to write for the wedding um I'm nervous I'm gonna cry Spencer was uh was a part of like our wedding too he did like a part of our ceremony um it was I cried my the entire like day of my wedding I mean obviously leah you've been in the in love with leah for almost 10 years like obviously you were crying i

Speaker 8 um someone messaged me and was like did you go to becky's wedding i said we weren't friends like we weren't i know i was thinking about that too because i watch my wedding video often and i got like sad the other day i was like oh i wish i wish like we would have have rekindled i wish larry would have died a little earlier so

Speaker 8 we could have rekindled a little earlier no just kidding larry's my dad

Speaker 9 um larry is Becky's dad. And my friend, my hairstylist and my friend Taylor also became friends with Becky through my friendship with Becky.

Speaker 9 And she, I was actually in her chair in her salon when she told me that your dad passed. And so I was sitting there getting my hair done.
And I was like, I literally looked at her and I was like, I,

Speaker 9 I, I don't know how to navigate this. Like, I don't know what's too personal.
I don't know, I don't want it to be fake. Like, I don't know how to do this.

Speaker 9 And so I thought the best way to do it was to comment because I was like, I don't, like, I just truly didn't know how to navigate it.

Speaker 9 And so um shout out to taylor because if she didn't tell me that like truly divine intervention because if she didn't tell me that i don't think i would have known and i don't think that i would have necessarily reached out but i've said it a million times and i'll tell you again it's like i could not bring myself to look at your profile like i thought about you on a regular fucking basis not just you but like you and leah like i wonder if they i remember somebody telling me um

Speaker 9 that you got engaged, I think. Like someone might have told me that.
And I was just like, wow, like like so much is happening. and then um

Speaker 9 just i never i couldn't look because if i looked i would have went down a rabbit hole and stayed there and i think that um i have a lot of insecurities and i i get really emotional about my friendship fallouts because i think that's so the i think the greater narrative like i'm not saying this to like focus on the trolls or the negative but like people typically think that it is my fault like i am the common denominator and i can't i have to acknowledge the fact that i am the common denominator with my friendships and when you look at the other girls on the show, like you know, Chelsea or Leah and things like that, like none of them have public fallouts, and none of them kind of have that same common denominator issue with like their friendship fallouts.

Speaker 9 And what's interesting is, in my opinion, and I don't know if I'm biased, you could maybe speak to this a little bit, is that I really just don't think that I am the problem every single time.

Speaker 9 Like, I think either it's like a mutual thing or like people do me dirty, yeah.

Speaker 8 And I just

Speaker 9 ours was mutual. Um, I don't think that it was me being the problem.
I think you know, and

Speaker 9 you could, you've been there for all like some of my bullshit. I, you know, Bone and I fell out because I was not in a good place with Chris.
And so it was like taking a toll on her.

Speaker 9 I wasn't being a good person, but like,

Speaker 9 it wasn't just because I'm a shitty person at my core. And I think that's what people think.

Speaker 8 Yeah, no, I think that like,

Speaker 8 unfortunately, your life is lived a lot differently than the normal person.

Speaker 8 And you also put your friendships a lot more publicly, right? So like Chelsea and Leah and them don't, like, I don't even know who their closest people are to them. I guess I do.
I mean, anyway.

Speaker 9 I know who like some of them are, but I think that I like put them front facing more.

Speaker 8 Correct. Yeah.
But like, but with that, like.

Speaker 8 You get put in a lot more situations.

Speaker 8 I can resonate with bone so much because like those were all added things to our relationship too right like so you you take you as a person and put you inside a toxic relationship and like me being some and like we were friends when I was still either in a toxic relationship or coming out of a toxic relationship like Lee is the first healthy besides like my early on relationship um Lee is the first relationship that I haven't been in a toxic relationship and it took me two years inside that relationship to even like manage like manage those feelings and those thoughts and even longer into that so like i was healing myself of toxic and you were in toxic and that was like overwhelming at baseline and so you have all these external factors that come along with being friends with you right like you having to question like people's loyalty you having to question of who's gonna go run and talk to the media about your life because like there's shit about you that like people wanna know like who's there, really?

Speaker 8 Who's there, not really?

Speaker 8 And even if you have someone that like is there for you in like the purest sense, it's not easy for you to be able to navigate that thought process because, like, that's just naturally something that you've like the cards you've been dealt in your life that you have to go through.

Speaker 8 So, like, there's just like there's so much that adds up to your life specifically that makes things 20 times worse, right? Like,

Speaker 9 well, what's interesting though, too, is like, I have had a lot of fallouts, right? And I completely,

Speaker 8 I'm not in denial about that, but

Speaker 9 I've, you know, Bone and I fell out and we rekindled our friendship and we've been friends ever since. And I don't think that ever gets acknowledged, right?

Speaker 9 Like, people do, a lot of times people will come back and apologize to me for things because they acknowledge that it wasn't necessarily my fault, you know?

Speaker 9 And I'm not saying that I take no fault because I absolutely have a hand in everything.

Speaker 9 But what I'm saying is it's not, it's, it's more, I think, the situation and the circumstances surrounding like the time or whatever. But like, I just don't think I'm a shitty person at my core.

Speaker 9 And I don't, I wish that more people would just like,

Speaker 9 I don't know. I think

Speaker 8 you're not a, you aren't like, you are not, you're far from a shitty person at like your core. You have baseline

Speaker 8 by shitty people that have made you a shitty person.

Speaker 8 No, seriously.

Speaker 8 Like when I was friends with you and I started surrounding myself with people that were around you, like they started making me become a shitty person, right?

Speaker 8 Like they like, they started pulling sides out of me that like were disgusting. And so like

Speaker 8 you're around that all the time. Me and like not for nothing, Kale, people end friendships all the time.
Like I am not friends with half the people I was friends with.

Speaker 8 Yes, my core friends are still friends that I've had for a while, but like I also lost a lot of friends. Like I've had falling outs with like

Speaker 8 a great deal of people.

Speaker 8 I've grown in separate ways than quite a bit of people. So like your early 20s,

Speaker 8 I just, I had written a blog post about this. Like your early to late 20s, you go through this just like crazy.

Speaker 8 like change in life of like your friends change, your priorities change, like you're changing. And like some friendships make it through that growth and some don't.

Speaker 8 And like some come back and some don't and both like kind of are fine. Like people ending being friends doesn't have to be like

Speaker 8 this,

Speaker 8 I hate you. Like I'm never talking to you again.
Like it can be like a natural just separation of friendships and that's normal.

Speaker 8 Like I'm not friends with some people as close because our lives just don't match up anymore. Like it doesn't mean I don't care about them less.

Speaker 9 100%. And I think that that too is like

Speaker 9 needs to be considered. How do you feel about friends? This is like completely unrelated to us, but how do you feel about friends who just

Speaker 9 dip and never talk to you again? Like just ghost?

Speaker 8 I guess it depends like how the like

Speaker 8 how the friendship was prior.

Speaker 8 I don't really have people like just ghost me, but like someone, someone did that to me.

Speaker 9 Actually, it'll be

Speaker 9 a year in December.

Speaker 8 Sometimes you like never know what someone else is going through too. Like even with us, like I was so, I,

Speaker 8 we had a dis we had a disagreement and then I never talked to you again for five years, right?

Speaker 9 Like that essentially is the craziest statement.

Speaker 8 Like, you, but it's sip, right? But like, it wasn't the discussion that ended. Like, it was

Speaker 8 my state of well-being. It was like where I, like the shit that I was going through personally.

Speaker 8 so I don't know ghosting can come from so many different things I just like I empathize with people a little bit

Speaker 8 like more just because like I've just been through I mean you know I've been through life and you've been through life so I just I feel like

Speaker 9 there's reasons not that it makes it okay I don't know that we I wouldn't have considered like what we went through ghosting like I don't think you ghosted me I feel like we mutually decided to never talk again

Speaker 9 like just subconsciously I don't even know if it was a conscious decision. It was just, it just happened that way.

Speaker 8 I think if we stayed friends, it would have ended a lot worse. Like, it would have ended

Speaker 8 that, like, we would have, wouldn't have been able to come back from.

Speaker 8 Just with like everything going on.

Speaker 9 Given the circumstances and where we were both at, in, you know, just an from an individual standpoint, I think that it was best case scenario that we just didn't talk again.

Speaker 9 That was the way it needed to end. And if, just like you said, if, if it ended any differently, it could have been really bad.

Speaker 9 But I'm just glad that we're back i'm glad that i i hope to be a part of your future kids lives i hope that you can meet the other half of my children because you've only met three of them and or known three of them and i think lux was a baby the last like a toddler the last time and um lincoln and lux are

Speaker 9 and creed creed's four so he's getting there but lincoln and lux are soccer stars through and through like they love soccer they love basketball so and i know that you love those sports too so like it would just be so much fun to, I don't know, like, get have you back and have them, have you in their lives and me and your babies' lives.

Speaker 9 And I still, I know that you guys have like some names picked out, but I still just feel like Kale is unisex. So, like, I'm just saying.

Speaker 8 Okay, but it is, there is some irony in it was so funny when me and Leah have been talking about names because

Speaker 8 her dad's middle name is a name that you always said you wanted to name one of your kids.

Speaker 8 And so anytime we would talk about it, I'd be like, when we weren't like talking, I'd be like, Kale's gonna see this and be like, you bitch. That was my name.

Speaker 9 There's a reason why the stars did not align for me to have that name, but it's, I, no, truly would love if you, like, because I not that I know that it wouldn't be after me or because of me, but I feel like it just, I don't know, it's just a sign that you should use it.

Speaker 9 And I feel like I would be like, I would feel like a little, a little part of that.

Speaker 8 Yeah.

Speaker 9 It's a good name.

Speaker 8 It's what's also the irony is like the 10 years of friendship that we had, you were pregnant the entire time of it. And

Speaker 8 now that we're back to being friends, I'm the one that's trying to get pregnant.

Speaker 9 Wait, that's like the, that's the clip that I'm going to request for this entire episode is like 10 years you were pregnant and now I'm trying to get pregnant. Yeah, no, I love that.

Speaker 9 I actually love that you let me even be. Did you tell Leah that I gave you a shot?

Speaker 8 Yeah.

Speaker 9 Was she okay with it?

Speaker 8 Yeah.

Speaker 8 Okay. You know, sometimes like when you're

Speaker 9 like babies are a big deal. So I just like worry that, you know, if she has something that she wants to go a certain way, like I just like don't want to over.

Speaker 8 She works with her friends that night and she let her friends do like her show.

Speaker 9 Yeah. That's crazy.
I

Speaker 9 have

Speaker 9 100% made the decision off of that that I will absolutely not be doing IVF for for another daughter. Because I have entertained the idea of IVF to get another girl specifically.
Well, because

Speaker 9 I really want Valley to have a sister. Like, that's really important to me.
And

Speaker 9 I,

Speaker 9 Kristen, if you ask Kristen, she will even still to this day, like, even though she was there and saw me give the shot and I told her absolutely not, like, I'm not doing this.

Speaker 9 She's like, I still don't believe you.

Speaker 9 I, me giving you that IVF shot solidified it for me. I will not be be having um IVF with gender selection.
So

Speaker 9 you heard it here first

Speaker 8 because you don't want to have to do shots.

Speaker 9 I was in pain for you, and I just don't. How many shots do you have to take a day? I want to do like a full episode with you on this, but

Speaker 8 I literally was just talking. So I

Speaker 8 we went through Seed Scout for our donor selection, and we'll have an entire episode on this because it won't give it value to kind of breeze through it.

Speaker 8 But one thing I need people to know is that it is not that bad. Like,

Speaker 8 I'd under if you're afraid of shots, it might be a little bit worse, but like, it gets redundant having to, you know, stick yourself, but like,

Speaker 8 it's not that bad. It doesn't really, it doesn't hurt.
You're like, you're just kind of doing it. It's not that bad.
So don't be afraid. And I also saw.

Speaker 8 I've been getting annoyed because I saw, like, I saw another couple posted, like, don't do retrievals together. Like, absolutely not.
Don't do retrievals together. Um,

Speaker 8 and it's like, why are you telling people not to do something? Lee and I are doing retrievals together, and we're having a great time. Like, it's we nothing, we're like happy and excited together.

Speaker 9 Do you think that you guys can be there for the other,

Speaker 9 like, each of you can be there for the other partner the same way

Speaker 9 that you would be there for each other if you were not going through that process?

Speaker 8 So, like, for example, if you guys both get pregnant at the same time, are you going to be able to put your all into giving her the attention and love and all the things that she need if you're also going through the same thing yeah i think that and we've thought about i don't think it and i don't think everyone could do it lee and i are like obsessed with each other like we like i love i don't know the idea of us doing it together is like so exciting exciting for me but also like I've been like severely depressed and like wanting to take dirt naps all the time.

Speaker 8 So I've been through like all all the emotions that life kind of throws at you. And so, I feel like anything that comes with pregnancy, I'll be able to kind of like manage.

Speaker 8 Leah, I'm a little bit more worried about just because she's like a fragile, like, she's a little bit more fragile, like this innocent like being.

Speaker 8 So, I don't think I'll be able to be there as much as I would have if I wasn't pregnant. But I think that because of our relationship and our ability to communicate and like

Speaker 8 our house having two separate floors, so one of us can move downstairs, need be,

Speaker 8 We'll be fine.

Speaker 9 Well, I definitely want to do an entire episode about this because I think people would be so interested and just like want to know the process and the journey. But for now,

Speaker 9 I'm going to get ready for the day. I'm going to go explore LA for a little while.
And I love you, and I'm glad that we rekindled this.

Speaker 9 Tell everyone where they can find you, all your socials, your podcast for the haters. We're going to plug that.
We're going to put it in the description. Tell us where people can find you.

Speaker 8 Everyone can find find me on all social media. It's all the same.
It's Hater25, H-A-Y-T-E-R-25.

Speaker 8 For the Haters was my podcast that I had when Kale and I were friends, and we are working on some things, hopefully, to bring it back. So all the episodes from season one and two are still out there.

Speaker 8 So For the Haters, you can find on anything, anywhere you listen to your podcast.

Speaker 9 And they can find your blog on your website, which is

Speaker 8 beckyhater.com. Period.
I just got into blogging.

Speaker 9 Yeah.

Speaker 9 I did read one of your blogs the other night and I was like, oh, I love this. Actually, I don't know that I would be able to do it myself, but I loved yours.

Speaker 8 Yeah, it's just short and sweet. They're like two-minute reads.
They're just like thoughts of life that I'm having.

Speaker 8 When my dad died, I started doing that. Anyway, yeah, we could yap forever.
So let's end this.

Speaker 9 And we'll be back with a full episode at some point. I love you.
And tell Leah I said hello.

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Speaker 4 When someone walks into your workplace, a guest, a contractor, a delivery, do you really know who they are? That's where Sign In App comes in.

Speaker 4 It's the simple secure visitor management system that replaces paper logs with instant visibility.

Speaker 4 Scan an ID, sign in, and you'll know exactly who's on site and why they're there because confidence starts with control.

Speaker 4 Over 22,000 businesses already trust SignInApp to keep their workplaces safe, professional, and welcoming. Try it free at signinapp.com.
Smart, secure sign-in for workplaces.