Episode 93 - Artificial Intelligence

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Hello, and welcome to the Beef and Dairy Network podcast, the number one podcast for those involved, or just interested, in the production of beef animals and dairy herds.

The Beef and Dairy Network podcast is the podcast companion to the Beef and Dairy Network website as well as the printing magazine brought to you by Value Value Grow Basic.

Before we go any further, may I apologise for my slightly husky voice this month?

I'm just shaking off the last of a light bout of bovine splenic fever.

My GP, Dr.

Sam Archer, tells me that it won't be long before I'm back to full fitness, and indeed my nipples have almost completely gone back to normal.

Later, we speak to some people making ripples in the theatre world.

But first, artificial intelligence.

Artificial intelligence, or AI, is a big, big buzzword in the general world of science, revolution in the way that communications, industry from Christmas to New Year, and beyond, and before that.

Thinking time now the computer can compute on our behalf in electronic fashion.

Now, what you probably didn't notice about that last thing I just said is that it was entirely written by artificial intelligence.

Pretty amazing, huh?

Well, check out this next bit.

In the future, a podcast like this one could be entirely written by AI and even presented by an AI voice.

The next thing you'll hear has been generated by a machine learning algorithm that has learned my voice and can reproduce it.

And now it's me talking again.

Or is it?

Anyway, to help us understand how the growth of AI might help with various processes in the beef and dairy industries, I spoke to Dr.

Katie Beam.

Hi, I'm Dr.

Katie Beam, and I work for the Future Foundation as an AI engineer.

Katie, thank you so much for coming in.

It feels like at the moment all we're hearing about is AI and I just wanted to talk to someone who could who could explain kind of what it is.

Yeah, oh thank you so much.

Well as you've sort of pointed out it is a really exciting time for AI at the moment.

In terms of how I relate to it I'm really really interested in seeing how AI can be applied to the beef and dairy industry.

Hmm.

Yeah, people often say to me that they have the impression that farmers, for example, are kind of

stuck in their ways.

You know, obviously you'll go to a farm, you'll often see a farmer keeping his trousers up with a piece of string, for example.

And you think, well, you know, they haven't even embraced the leather belt yet.

So

will they take on this new technology?

But I actually think if you, you know, farmers have been using new technology for years.

And I think there's an appetite to embrace AI.

Yeah, well, I'm really glad you said that, actually, because that's what I'm really hopeful about.

You know, I'm feeling really hopeful that it's easy to dismiss people who work in those sort of traditional industries, but actually, you're right, there is an appetite for for modernizing and moving with the times and yeah i'm excited to see where we can go with it when you visit if i know you do farm visits with your work trying to um sort of sell farmers on the benefits of what you do

if you see someone and that their trousers are held up with an old piece of string does your heart sink yeah it's not something i've encountered personally um most of the farmers i've met have been sort of you know able to dress themselves um yeah so it's it's not something that you know that that's a big problem what about if the trousers are absolutely stuffed full of like ferrets?

Again,

that's not something I've encountered.

I'm not sure where you're sort of getting those ideas from.

But yeah, farmers nowadays are much more up-to-date than

stereotypical ideas would have you believe.

I mean, you know, there's an argument that says, despite all the technology that's being thought of and developed by the likes of yourselves, there's still nothing really that challenges the warmth you get from from six, seven, eight ferrets down your trousers on a winter's morning.

No, I mean, yeah, obviously I take your point.

This is your, in some ways, your area of expertise, but

I feel like we're sort of missing the main point here, which is, which is AI.

Okay.

And yeah, you know,

let's talk about that.

Something I was very interested in in your press release was that you said that the first stage of your work and that you spent a number of years on, I believe, was working out exactly how intelligent a cow is.

Yeah, yeah, absolutely, yeah.

Thank you.

After many months of research, I've come to the exciting conclusion, to be honest, that

their level of intelligence equates to that of a DVD player, which is actually much higher than many people expected.

Rise.

Okay, so

just want to get my head around this.

You mean that a cow is able to do the same things that a DVD player is able to do?

Well, obviously not, because a cow can't play you a film.

But

no, more what I'm saying is that the level of intelligence is

very similar to the level of

capability that a DVD player has.

So are you putting the DVD just like jam it in the arse, hole?

Oh,

no, I'm not...

I'm not saying we're going to put a DVD in a cow, obviously.

In the mouth?

As I say, I'm not suggesting that we put a DVD in a cow.

That's absolutely...

Sorry, sorry.

I'm just passionate about my subject.

I don't mean to sound...

This is the way that we're presenting the information to the public.

I mean, it's obviously a lot more complicated and scientific than that.

This is how we're best describing it in this kind of like broad terms.

Looking forward into the future,

is there ever a time, or can you ever conceive of a time when a cow would be able to play a Blu-ray?

Okay.

As I said before, this is not about trying to insert something into a cow

to insert a or to somehow make a film come out of a cow.

I'm just saying that the level of intelligence that I...

So I know, you know, I do, I get this.

You're saying a cow isn't currently intelligent enough to project 4K HD footage.

I'm actually not suggesting a cow should project any footage.

What I'm saying is that

cows are smarter than we think.

They're not geniuses.

That would be crazy, but they're smarter than we think.

But it kind of depends what DVD it is, because if it's like A Beautiful Mind, for example, that film, obviously, that's really clever.

But if you're just playing, like, I don't know, Shrek, that doesn't feel like it's as intelligent okay um I'm I'm not sure how how much more I can explain this but I'm not saying that there's any film going into a cow

I'm not saying that okay let's let's let's let's let's move on to my next question

um do you get differences of intelligence between different cows so for example a younger cow versus an older cow is there a difference there yeah that now that is a good question um yes there is of course when they're younger they're still learning and and by that logic you know, an older cow,

maybe born as long ago as early 90s,

they only remember VCRs.

So to them, they don't even...

You know, they may have learned what a DVD is, but they're not DVD native in the same way

as someone who's born in the DVD era.

Okay.

I mean,

is this a waste of my time?

Is it the best use of a cow's time to be playing a DVD rather than a...

Okay, look, okay, look, look, that's not what I'm talking about.

I'm talking about...

I'm sorry, are you not more excited about the possibilities of AI in relation to the beef and dairy industry?

Well, yeah, okay.

No, let's talk about that.

Let's talk about the future.

Yeah, good.

Thank you.

So your work's very future-focused.

Yeah.

And if you think about a cat, like I'm just spitballing here, so you can tell me if this is, you know.

Okay.

You know, this is maybe a good idea for you.

You know, a cow has two eyes.

Yes.

Left and right.

So imagine this.

You're projecting sort of green out of one, red out of the other.

Okay, I've had enough of it.

No, you've got a 3D picture then.

No, I'm sorry.

I haven't come all this way to talk about fucking 3D films.

I thought you would be interested.

This is like the one place I thought we'd have a clear understanding of what we've been doing and the

researching for fucking years.

And you've just absolutely shut all over it.

Thank you to Dr.

Katie Beam.

Perhaps surprisingly, more from Dr.

Katie later.

But first, what would you say if I told you that the Bovine Farmers Union this week donated over a million pounds to a project to build an authentic Elizabethan theatre in London?

To find out why, I spoke to artistic directors Sir Paul St.

Albans Montefiore and Shakespearean actor Cam Tandy, who are currently raising money to build what they are calling the real Globe Theatre, a new theatre to compete with the existing Globe Theatre in London, which itself is a supposedly authentic reconstruction of Shakespeare's theatre from the 1600s.

Hello, my name is Sir Paul St Albans Monty Fiore.

I am the artistic director of the Real Globe Theatre in London.

Hello, I'm Cam Tendi and I am an actor at the Real Globe Theatre.

So why do these two want to build another Shakespearean theatre directly next to the existing Globe Theatre?

And what does this have to do with the Bovine Farmers Union?

I met Sir Paul and Cam outside the existing Globe Theatre in London to find out.

So, thank you both for joining me here.

We are, of course, outside London's famous Globe Theatre, Shakespeare's Globe, much beloved by theatre-goers and tourists alike, and they are thronging the place.

They're all going in to watch a production of Taming of the Shrew.

Yeah, it's busy.

Well, it's half term, isn't it?

So, it is

filling up the place today, I'm sure.

It's warming like rats.

Sir Paul and Cam had both both been working at the existing globe theatre until last summer sepal began by telling me how it was his belief in the importance of authenticity that meant he had to leave authenticity is such a um it's such a powerful word and it has become it's become our watchword it's become our mantra and the the globe that you see before us

i i think it falls down on so many counts of authenticity these days because the point of this building really was to put Shakespeare back in an authentic Shakespearean theatre.

That's right.

And you're saying this isn't an authentic space?

No, no.

Well for a start the bricks are actual bricks and not bricks of manure as they were in Shakespeare's day.

Bricks of manure sort of tied up with string, packed in tight, and that really gave the place that sort of you know, grubby, earthy smell that really focused the mind, which was important both for the actors and for the audience.

Everyone needed to be focused focused.

And when the whole place smelled quite that bad,

it was easier to do so, you know.

So in this globe theater,

if it smells of shit, something's gone wrong.

Whereas in your theater, if something smells of shit, it's going right.

In our theatre, and we can promise you that, we'll actually give a money-back guarantee.

If you're watching a show and you can't smell shit, we will give you your money back.

We want to make sure that every person, every man, woman, and child's experience at the real globe is an authentic one.

There'll be no place you can stand in the round where you can't smell shit.

Exactly.

That's a Gaston guarantee.

Cow as an actor obviously you've you've acted in this globe

were you originally attracted by the idea that you're doing something authentic?

Is that important to you?

Yeah it's really important to me and I think like the whole point of of authenticity is you can't can't sanitise it.

They're bang on about authenticity.

I've never seen anyone mopping up blood with piles of straw, for instance.

That should be not like a daily occurrence in an authentic globe, but an hourly occurrence, if not half hourly.

And you will be introducing cholera, if your press release is to be believed.

That will be

prevalent in that.

We will be introducing seasonal cholera.

It won't be there for every...

It won't be there for every show.

That very much depends on the season.

Again, we are using...

Kind of like a Christmas thing?

Christmas, certainly, and probably through to spring, at least through March and April.

So if you're coming to see a half-term show with us,

you can be pretty much guaranteed that your little rats or children

will probably contract cholera.

Non-lethal, it's important to say.

Non-lethal.

But you know, give you

a good run around.

I'll say that much.

Yes, it'll probably extend your half-term by a week or two.

A month, probably.

Yes.

Yeah,

but you won't die.

It's likely that you won't die.

Okay.

More than likely.

It's not just bricks made of shite and cholera that the real globe will be bringing back.

Sepul and Cam seem to have thought of everything.

We intend it to be a full sensory sort of a sensory experience.

You'll be offered things, coerced into situations that you

know have just simply not been part of the experience of late.

For example,

in Shakespeare's Shakespeare's time, you would go in to watch a play, but you would leave having been press ganged into the navy.

And

that's something that we want to

bring back.

We want to bring back that kind of, you know,

a truly immersive theatre going experience.

Okay, so if you're a man of fighting age and you go and watch a play in the Real Globe, what are your chances that you'll end up waking up on the...

the prow of a ship making your way across the Atlantic?

I would say 95 to 100%.

Right.

Right.

Yes.

And what navy are they being put to work in?

Well, that actually is something of a sticking point at the moment.

We don't yet have an agreement from His Majesty's Navy, so we are in the process of setting up our own Navy, but we want to ensure that that Navy also sort of

is an authentic experience and authentic to Shakespeare's time.

So that Navy will be fighting wars against the French, I imagine,

or Spanish.

I'll have to check my history on that.

Thankfully, it's been one of the niche benefits of Brexit is that it's actually

because of various diplomatic loopholes,

we've been able to have various conversations with countries that

would have just been absolutely shut down when they were.

So now

you can speak to the Spanish diplomat and say, hey, do you fancy a sea battle?

You would be gobsmapped by the people we speak to about this.

And a level of interest is off the charts from countries that...

Well, I can't name the countries.

But,

yeah.

Crazy levels of enthusiasm.

Portugal.

Hefty.

Oh, sorry.

No, no, sorry, Cam's right.

We can't name the countries.

Portugal is what.

But we can't name, we shouldn't name anymore.

Let's talk about bears.

Well, we must.

We must, because otherwise, what are we doing here?

Sure.

If the rumours are to be believed, you've put in a big order for bears from Romania.

The biggest order that we could place, yes.

Yeah, where do you get bears from?

Well, Romania for.

Although, ironically, the bears themselves aren't Romanian.

It's just that the Romanians are the only ones who will sell us the bears.

They're the only ones who can be.

So where are they sourcing the bears?

Legally.

The bears are from all over.

Right.

Again, you wouldn't believe the places that they source them.

Portugal.

Sorry, I shouldn't keep saying Portugal here, but some of them do come from Portugal.

It's worth giving them a shout out.

Have they arrived yet?

We've had one or two practice bears.

We've had one or two practice bears in the space.

I mean, and they're really really young.

They're really young.

They have sort of corks on their teeth, corks

on their claws.

They're practice bears.

Cam, have you had the opportunity to act?

Yeah, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I've spent a bit of time with Paddington 1 and Paddington 2, which is what we've been calling them.

And yeah, they're great.

They're great.

They're, you know, to work with because honestly, they're better than a lot of people I've worked with.

A lot of people have worked with.

Roylands.

Well,

that's that's the thing.

You can't.

You can't ask Rylance to put corks on his teeth.

So when he bites you...

Cork in his mouth.

Yeah.

Yes.

Got like a hit of nerve here with Rylance, but no, no, he's got his own.

He's got his own thing.

But no, the bears are great.

So, bear-wise, are we talking...

Are they on stage?

Is it a bit of bear baiting, a bit of wrestling?

Oh, no,

I should be very clear.

I should be very clear.

We do absolutely do not condone the practice of bearbaiting.

That is absolutely not what this is.

But no, quite the opposite, in fact.

A lot of our research has shown that in Shakespeare's time, again, just coming back to that magic word, authenticity.

Just as in Shakespeare's time,

and sadly,

women were not really allowed

to play characters in the play.

So,

when men were forced, coerced into playing the female characters, that often left a deficit.

And to make up for that deficit, often bears were drafted into play the male characters.

I see.

So, not always, but quite a large proportion of the male roles in Shakespeare's plays were filled by bears when men were playing the women.

More after this.

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now before we find out why the bovine farmers union are sinking so much money into the theatre it's time to go back to my interview with dr katie beam from the future foundation after she stormed out of the studio i managed to convince her to come back

dr katie um thanks for coming back it's okay um what happened before is a misunderstanding.

Is that how you'd characterise it?

Not really, no, but here I am.

I misunderstood what you were talking about, I think.

I see.

Well, yeah, massively so, and yes.

Okay, so I apologise for that.

I really value your time and the fact you've come here, and I'm interested in your work, and I think I just went down a cul-de-sac.

You know, it happens.

Okay, well, thank you.

That's, you know, I appreciate that.

Thank you.

Okay.

So thanks for coming back in.

There are questions about AI that I wanted to ask that I haven't yet asked,

you know, because you

had to leave.

And returned so graciously.

So

are you happy for me to...

Yeah, I mean, as you know, I'm extremely keen to talk about AI and providing we can approach this in an adult intelligent way, then yeah, of course.

Okay.

Let's just start then with what is AI?

Oh, wow.

Okay.

Well, that's a very big question.

I mean, put simply, it's artificial intelligence.

But

as you know,

what we're excited about is how we can apply that artificial intelligence to

sentient beings, to cows.

And the way that farms and dairies are run, basically.

Is that the case?

Yeah, yeah, exactly that.

Exactly.

We're all about trying to find more sort of...

more efficient ways to run the farming industry, particularly as people's lives are getting busier and busier.

There is a huge demand for this.

Aaron Powell, and obviously people are going to start worrying about, you know,

are they going to replace people working in farms?

Today's farmhand,

will they have a job in ten years' time or will it be replaced by AI?

Can you speak to that?

Can you speak to that concern?

Aaron Powell, yeah, absolutely.

I do understand that concern, and that's very much a hot button topic at the moment across all industries, as you're probably aware.

Personally, what I'm interested in is how we can integrate AI to make human jobs easier and more efficient, not to eliminate humans from the process.

I mean, that that might be a natural result of how things go in decades to come, but for now we're just thinking about it more in terms of efficiency.

And do you think

we'll get to a stage, maybe not this decade, maybe not

next decade, but maybe some time in the future, where we're forced essentially t

to have sex with robots?

I'm d Sorry,

did you mean to say that?

Do you.

Yeah, I guess my question is like, you know, if people want to do that, I think no.

I wouldn't have a problem with that, you know, if

people wanted to do it.

But it's up to them, isn't it?

Hang on.

Sorry, sorry, I'm just a bit unclear as to how this relates to what we've been talking about.

So.

Well, you're talking about the future.

Yeah.

Everything went by AI.

Well.

And then, you know, a few more steps down the road, you know, human sexual

congress is threatened then

by the robots that we're being forced, in some cases I think, to have to co-opulate with.

I don't understand how you have suddenly made this about sex when nothing I was saying was at all relating to I wasn't even talking about relationships between AIs and humans.

Do you think that relationships will be affected by the situation?

I don't know.

I don't care, to be honest.

I mean, I do care.

I didn't mean to say that, but this is not not relevant.

I can't believe you've coaxed me back in here and to talk about fucking sex with robots.

This is absolutely the most immature thing I've ever heard, especially from someone in your position.

Good fucking pie!

I've learned over the years in journalism that if the person you're interviewing storms out twice, it's very unlikely they'll come back back for a third time.

However, in this case, Dr.

Katie's taxi wasn't booked for another 45 minutes.

And so, after some persistent badgering and me giving her £80,

she decided to come back in.

So, Dr.

Katie,

my apologies again.

Yep.

I'm so pleased that you came back to finish the interview.

I guess again, I just,

you know, a little cul-de-sac,

you know, question-wise.

And I feel like, you know, I'm a journalist.

I have a responsibility to ask the questions that my listeners will be, you know, will be popping up in their brains.

And I think, you know, maybe I got that wrong.

So thank you so much for coming back.

Yes, here I am.

There are questions that I wanted to ask you that I haven't

got to yet.

And I'm really pleased that.

Right.

So,

given that you've spent so many years working on this, how long have you been working in this field?

I've been working in this field for at least 15 years.

Yeah.

So, it's fair to say you've got your head around this stuff.

You know, you know what you're talking about.

Yes, yes.

So, given the fact that, you know,

you've thought about this.

Yes, very much so.

Would you

have sex with the woman?

Oh, my God!

This is absolutely a I can't even.

You are a joke.

A big thanks to Dr.

Katie Beam for that interview.

We wish her all the best with her plans to implement artificial intelligence in the beef and dairy industries, whatever they may be.

Right, now I think I'll let the AI voice take over and introduce this next part while I go and inject a saline solution into my spine.

Okay, back to our interview with Sir Paul St.

Albans, Montefiore, and Cam Tandy.

When he left the Globe Theatre to set up the real globe, Cam, guided by his quest for authenticity, went back to the original Shakespeare texts and was surprised by what he found.

End my suffering.

I was really spurred on to dig into the most authentic versions of all of the plays that we could find, as well as the authenticity of the theatre itself.

And

obviously, we draw our copies of Shakespeare now from the existing

first folio generally, but there are other folios, bad folios, good folios, bad quartos.

And I started to notice that the further I went back, sort of collating several different folios from around the same sort of period that were then thrown out, is that so many of them have references to uh in particular beef like meat generally because he doesn't always specify beef but um it's it's safe to say that's usually what he's talking about when he mentions any kind of meat and i believe you you took these plays uh to support um how did you react when when you started putting together that there was this kind of theme coming through the work well that's been erased for some reason well when I first saw them, I was gobsmacked and then hungry because there were so many mentions of beef and I hadn't eaten.

But I was primarily gobsmacked and I couldn't believe what I was seeing.

But it's very hard to deny the veracity of these texts.

There are lots of theories about the authorship of Shakespeare's plays, aren't there?

So people say

they're written by Francis Bacon, they're written by Christopher Marlowe.

There's the one theory that says that they were actually written, some of them in 1970, by Pele.

Yes.

You know, why should we think that your theory about the place, which is that they were written by William Shakespeare, but they were more beef-focused than what the ones we have now, why should this one take precedent over the Pele theory, for example?

Well, listen, the Pele one is persuasive, and we would very much like to perform Pele's Hamlet because we think it's very brave and we think it's authentic.

And it's sensational as well.

And it's like it's sensational.

There's like a football match in every act.

Like 90-minute football match.

Hamlet was already the longest play.

But with this, it is

four hours plus

five times

injury time.

It's like a day out, basically.

It's a full day out.

It's worth seeing.

It's almost identical to the one that's...

that you should use now.

It's just the football matches is the main difference.

Every match is Brazil versus Denmark.

Yeah.

Brazil played by the Bears,

and they tend to win.

They do tend to win because there's...

There's a lot of injury time, like we say.

Yes.

Yes.

But let's go back to the beef theory.

The theory being, Cam, that really,

and correct me if I'm wrong, that the Globe, although a theatre, really, was more of a...

a kind of butcher or rather like a meat shop.

Yeah, basically, there was like within the, if you go into the current globe,

the globe in inverted commas,

the floor is on a slight slope of the yard and there are drains at the bottom.

And we mistakenly think that's for the runoff of things like rain or spilt drinks.

But that's for blood.

That's for blood.

There was a slaughterhouse on site.

For the average punter, the average sort of groundling or stinkard, as they were sometimes known, the

the sort sort of sounds and smells of the slaughterhouse would have been as much a part of whatever play was playing as

any speech the actor was speaking or any other special effects like cannon fire or screams.

And indeed, there's a sense that maybe the plays were written just to amuse people while they waited in line for their meat.

I think that's more than likely exactly why the theatre was put there in the first place.

There's plenty of standing standing space for cattle, plenty of blood runoff.

So, what are you going to do with the people who are coming from all over the South Bank so that while they're picking up sort of a brace of hooves,

do a play about a man who lives on an island with a magical goblin servant?

It is this connection with beef that has led the Bovine Farmers Union to invest a million pounds in the project.

And with this knowledge that Shakespeare's plays were written entirely to attract potential meat buyers to a large outdoor slaughterhouse and butcher's shop, it begins to put the plays in context, adding credence to the idea that Cam has that many of the plays have actually been changed.

In fact, according to Cam, many of the most famous lines from the plays have been doctored.

For example, A Horse, A Horse, My Kingdom for a Horse, was originally beeves, beeves.

My kingdom for some beeves.

There are hundreds of them.

Hundreds of the most, tens at least, of the most famous ones that have been completely replaced by the rest of the world.

Absolutely.

And even aside from those lines that have been replaced, I mean, there are still several others

that have survived.

That, you know, as we all know,

as we all know, when we sat through, you know, GCSE Macbeth,

what schoolchild up and down the country doesn't think, well, none of this Shakespeare stuff really makes sense?

Well, when you start to peel back the mystery, some of these things do, the truth of them starts to reveal themselves.

Lines like, oh, for a muse of fire.

Well, what could that possibly be referencing if not a barbecue?

You know,

and there are so many lines like that

that

once you know the truth,

they're just so hard to ignore.

And

some massive ones that become obvious when you realize that to be or not to be was indeed to beef.

Or not to beef or not to be.

Should I eat some beef?

Is what you're saying.

Should I?

The full line is, to beef or not to beef,

to which the answer is, of course, to beef.

And the title itself wasn't even Hamlet.

The original, of course, was beeflet.

I guess the most famous example would be

in Macbeth, sorry, the Scottish play, Is this a dagger which I see before me?

Now that is a bad transcription.

What that actually is, is,

is this a dagger which I see

beef

or

me?

Because he's looking in a mirror, you see, right?

And he's looking at himself holding obviously a plate of beef and a knife, and he's thinking about cutting the beef.

And then he's seeing a mirror.

Mirror is obviously quite rare technology at the time, so kind of showing off his kingly status and this sort of thing.

And

then, obviously, the rest of the monologue is him

finishing the beef.

Of course, a famous one that everyone will have seen, Romeo and Juliet.

What beef through yonder window breaks?

It is some beef, and Juliet has just thrown it through my window.

It's just incredible, isn't it?

Even just to hear it out loud, you know, the number of times I've kind of poured over that particular page,

you know, hearing it out loud, as it would have been said in his day, is

really moving.

And it was common, I believe, at the time for young lovers to hurl a big haunch of beef

through someone's window.

Silver-side joint, yeah.

Yeah.

Yes, you know, that's why they used to say, like, the bigger the beef, the longer the marriage.

And that's sort of what that sort of what that referred to that practice.

What about people listening to this interview who might be thinking, listen,

I've enjoyed Shakespeare my whole life.

I just want it the way that I know it.

You know, Romeo and Juliet, for example, is just a timeless and romantic tale of two 14-year-olds poisoning themselves.

And it should remain that way.

Listen, you know, don't knock it till you've tried it.

No, no, like strap in, that's what I'd say to him.

Strap in and prepare to just enhance.

Just prepare to enhance.

Yes.

So your feeling is that you're actually, you're just adding to the experience, you're not taking anything away.

Absolutely.

Absolutely.

Yes.

We are re-weaving in fresh

flavours that have been lost in the recipe for such a long time.

And people need to be tasting those flavours.

They need to be literally tasting those flavours.

They need, frankly, frankly, to have those flavours rammed down their gullets.

And they need to feel those flavours intermingling

in their gut and wreaking havoc on their immune system and

coming out after their

cholera fugues

in a better place.

Yeah.

By the time we're done with them, they're going to be basically

choking on

marrow, parsley,

disease

and

enlightenment.

Thank you so much for taking the time to talk to me.

Thank you.

If people listening want to help out and maybe donate some manure bricks or

money if you'd prefer, I'm not sure what you'd like.

Again,

it's all available.

It's all on the Kickstarter page and the subreddit.

So

involved.

And we are taking all sorts of donations, manure bricks, certainly.

And as I know, I keep saying on Twitter, and if you follow me on Twitter you'll know we are still looking for a blunderbuss.

So if anybody out there has the blunderbus do get in touch because we are really motivated to get that blunderbus.

Yes and in addition to those donations if

anyone has any experience training or pacifying bears or if anyone

can translate for a Portuguese bear then we would love to hear from you.

We really would love to hear from you.

As soon as possible.

Yes.

A big thanks to Sir Paul St.

Albans, Montefiore, and Cam Tandy for that interview.

However, as a result of Cam's research, it will be staged with its original name.

You probably didn't notice, but that last link was also an AI version of my voice.

Absolutely extraordinary.

After my interview with Sir Paul and Cam, because I was talking with them anyway, I thought I'd ask them about what they think about AI.

I just wanted to ask you about AI.

It's a big new thing.

It's having a huge impact to this artificial intelligence.

Of course, in the world of acting and writing, people are beginning to worry that

jobs could one day be taken over by AI.

So I'm interested to know

what you make of it.

Look, Look, look, I get as lonely as the next man, but I still don't think I would could bring myself to have sex with a robot.

I don't know.

I think to me it's the blinking thing, because they don't blink, do they?

And I think if they maybe if they could blink, then I would.

Cam, what's your what's your your insight as a as a oh as an actor and as a yeah I I you know I know uh about uh about as much about it as support, but I think I'd I'd give it a go.

Like I wouldn't mind.

I You know, I think I'd probably ask my wife

before I had sex with the robot.

Yeah.

I'd probably ask her.

Thank you for your valued contribution, both of you.

I'd love to hear more.

Yes, definitely.

Is there a website we can find out more?

So there we have it.

Could AI better the beef-themed plays of William Shakespeare?

Was Shakespeare more intelligent than a DVD player?

All questions that went unasked in this episode.

But sadly, that's all we've got time for this month.

If you're after more beef and dairy news, get over to our website now, where you'll find all the usual stuff, as well as our off-topic section, where this month we run down our top five books where leaves are a key theme.

Or at least, if not a theme, a recurring image.

Maybe used it as a kind of metaphor.

But not necessarily that.

So, until next time, beef out.

Thanks to Susan Harrison, Graham Dixon, and George Fouracres.

And sorry about my bloody voice.

Since the dawn of time, man has dreamed of bringing life back from the dead.

From Orpheus and Eurydice to Frankenstein's monster, resurrection has long been merely the stuff of myth, fiction, and fairy tale.

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That would be crazy, but the Dead Pilot Society podcast has found a way to resurrect great dead comedy pilots from Hollywood's finest writers.

Every month, Dead Pilot Society brings you a reading of a comedy pilot that was sold and developed, but never produced, performed by the funniest actors from film and television.

How does Dead Pilot Society achieve this miracle?

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This is Evelyn Denton, CEO of the only world-class, fully immersive theme resort, Steeplechase.

You know, I've been seeing more and more reports on the blogs that our beloved park simply isn't safe anymore.

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I'm gonna wreck it.

They say they got mugged by brigands in the fantasy kingdom of ephemera or hijacked by space pirates in Infinitum.

I mean, I could have a knife.

My papa said that I needed to do a crime.

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