2024 Memorable Moments: Celebrity Interviews

Speaker 1 The best B2B marketing gets wasted on the wrong people. Man, this tears me up.
So, when you want to reach the right professionals, use LinkedIn ads.

Speaker 1 LinkedIn has grown to a network of over 1 billion professionals, including 130 million decision makers. Hmm, I wonder if I'm one of those.

Speaker 1 That's why LinkedIn has the biggest B2B ROAS of all online ad networks. Spend $250 on your first campaign on LinkedIn ads and get a free $250 credit for the next one.
Pretty good deal.

Speaker 1 Just go to linkedin.com slash Conan. That's LinkedIn.com slash Conan.
Terms and conditions apply.

Speaker 1 Having the right people in your corner to support you in life makes all the difference. Trust me, I've been there.

Speaker 1 The person could be the friend who goes with you to test drive a new car, but it could also be the state farm agent who helps you choose coverage for that car.

Speaker 1 Let State Farm handle the coverage parts of life so you can focus on the fun parts of life, like taking your new car out on the open road. You don't have to worry about the coverage parts.

Speaker 1 You betcha. Go online at statefarm.com or use the award-winning app.
That app won an award. No surprise to get help from one of their local agents, like a good neighbor.
State Farm is there.

Speaker 1 Fall is here, hear the yell. Back to school, ring the bell, brand new shoes, walk in blues, climb the fence, books and pens.
I can tell that we are gonna be friends.

Speaker 1 Yes, I can tell that we are gonna be friends.

Speaker 2 Hello, welcome to Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend.

Speaker 2 Sorry,

Speaker 2 we just ate and there was a little gurgle there, and I really apologize. And if you didn't notice it, now everyone's rewinding so that they can hear it.
Why am I talking?

Speaker 2 Can I start over again?

Speaker 1 No, I think we've nailed it.

Speaker 2 Hello, and welcome to Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend. I'm Sonomo Obsessian.

Speaker 1 And I'm Matt Gorley.

Speaker 2 And you're Matt Gorley.

Speaker 1 You pointed at me, but at the same time, you took a breath like you were going to speak. That was very confusing.
Yes.

Speaker 2 And then I don't do this usually,

Speaker 2 but, you know, Conan is not here. In case anyone has noticed, it's me talking.
I'm Sona. I am not Conan.
And the reason that he's not here.

Speaker 1 I've never done this before.

Speaker 1 But shut up.

Speaker 2 The reason Conan is not here is he's back east with with his family. He unfortunately lost both his parents not that long ago.
So he's taking some time away. So Matt and I are holding the fort.

Speaker 1 Holding the fort is strong. Yeah.
I think opening the fort to invaders.

Speaker 2 Yes. I really need him to be here just to make this easier and more smooth.
But I kind of like the vibe.

Speaker 1 I do too. It's easy going.

Speaker 2 There's just the five of us here.

Speaker 1 Adam's with us and Eduardo and Blai, and we're just reading pizza and we're just hanging out so last week we did a collection of notable clips from our segments and intros was just just you me and Conan yeah this week we're doing some notable clips that kind of came to mind from so many wonderful moments this year of the celebrity interviews and

Speaker 2 I mean I mean we're yeah we're starting off with a with a with a big one

Speaker 1 What the listener won't know is that we retook this part. Yeah.
And in the first time we did it, you said banger. And since Conan wasn't here, I felt the need to point out your hard G.

Speaker 2 Yes. And I responded by saying you don't have to.
That you don't,

Speaker 2 you don't have to try to fill those

Speaker 1 gigantic shoes, is what I'm saying. That would be good of me to not do that.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 And then you made a joke

Speaker 2 about later on listening to a clip from Walton Jodgens,

Speaker 2 and that didn't make sense.

Speaker 1 It does make sense.

Speaker 2 How does it make sense?

Speaker 1 I said banger is

Speaker 1 I'm pretending that there's no such thing as a hard G, that everything's a soft G.

Speaker 2 Okay, so I'm going to channel Kona and be like, it's good that you have to explain what your joke is.

Speaker 2 We're starting with a banger.

Speaker 1 So, your friend, did you still got the hard G in there? I did. Benguer.
Banguer.

Speaker 2 We did a banger.

Speaker 2 Bang. Banger.
Banger.

Speaker 1 Banger.

Speaker 1 Banger. Banger.

Speaker 2 Hey, that's pretty good. Okay.

Speaker 2 Here's the clip. Al Pacino.

Speaker 1 Let's listen.

Speaker 1 You know, it's interesting because

Speaker 1 you're grabbed by the theater. You're this kid, as I said, who

Speaker 1 you start reading Chekhov. You start reading the classics, and it grabs you.
And you start seeing some productions. You get into theater.

Speaker 1 You have so many go-nowhere jobs just

Speaker 1 to

Speaker 1 stay alive. I mean, you're delivering papers.

Speaker 1 You're building superintendent for a while, but not a good one. I don't think.
Never, never. The guy came out and started talking about me a few years back.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Saying he was a terrible super or something like that. And I thought,

Speaker 1 well, why? Why would he say that? Yeah. He was a terrible super.
I'm sure there's a lot around. I mean, you know.
No, I saw that. There's a really old man who was like, I remember him.

Speaker 1 He was a terrible super. And I'm like, okay, take his Oscar back.
I will. Take my doctor, terrible super.

Speaker 1 Christopher Walking, bad mechanic.

Speaker 1 Robert De Niro, just an awful substitute teacher.

Speaker 1 You know, it's like, what the fuck? What are you talking about? These are.

Speaker 1 So you come along, you're doing theater, and then this thing that people dream about happens, which is you get noticed. Francis Ford Coppola is going to make the godfather, and he says,

Speaker 1 I want this guy, Al Pacino. And the studio says, fuck you.

Speaker 1 Of course.

Speaker 1 We want

Speaker 1 Robert Redford. We want, you know, we want, we, we, we want, uh, you know, we want someone who's been a success.
We want someone who looks a certain way.

Speaker 1 We want someone probably blonde hair, blue-eyed, whatever.

Speaker 1 Sorry. Yeah, exactly.

Speaker 1 I'm looking at you when I'm saying I'm sorry.

Speaker 1 They wanted me, actually.

Speaker 1 You know, my grandmother. I was eight at the time.
Yeah. My grandmother on my mother's side has blonde hair and blue eyes.

Speaker 1 So just to note that, I mean,

Speaker 1 it's in there. It's in you somewhere.
Yeah, it is. But what I'm saying is

Speaker 1 they don't want you, but and they, I've seen the screen tests where they're saying, okay, well, how about Jimmy Khan is Michael Cole? How about they're trying everybody.

Speaker 1 They're throwing everybody in there.

Speaker 1 But Fritz Fercopla sticks with you. They start shooting and

Speaker 1 you can tell, you read in the book, and it's riveting on the set. People are like, I don't know about this guy.
I don't know about this guy. I don't know what.
And you can feel it.

Speaker 1 Yeah, well, they were giggling.

Speaker 1 You heard giggling. Yes.
So here's what's amazing to me. These scenes that I've watched and that everyone's watched in this room 100,000 times

Speaker 1 that are now iconic. master classes in how you play a character, you're doing it and people are going, oh man, let's hope they get a real actor in here soon,

Speaker 1 which is unbelievable to me. Was it that severe Conan?

Speaker 1 I was an eight-year-old kid, but I was there

Speaker 1 and I had a lot of pull with the studio. I called Paramount and I was like, I don't think he's got it.
Who is this? Eight-year-old Conan O'Brien.

Speaker 1 What do you mean?

Speaker 1 Why aren't you using a real phone? Why are you mining one with your hands?

Speaker 1 Oh my god, that's funny.

Speaker 1 But no,

Speaker 1 and the thing is, which is, to me, I look at that performance and as you say in the book, your concept, which was clearly the right one, which is you got to slowly see

Speaker 1 Michael come to this position. And then there's the iconic scene where they're all trying to figure out.

Speaker 1 after Vito's been shot what to do and you are sitting there with your broken jaw and you say, okay, we arrange a meeting and the camera's pushing in.

Speaker 1 I can't watch that and I can't talk about it without tingling because I think it is a beautiful way to tell a story through acting,

Speaker 1 but it takes patience. And the studio was saying.

Speaker 1 Well, they wanted to see something else, I guess.

Speaker 1 And both Francis and I, I think, felt that way about, but we were unable, or at least I was unable to articulate what I was doing, but I was doing that. I thought about on my long walks in Manhattan.

Speaker 1 You talk about it. You would take long walks.
You get the film, but it hasn't started shooting yet. You took long walks.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I would go all the way from 91st to the village and back, 91st and Broadway, and I just think about the part.

Speaker 1 Think about it. I still do that with Wolves.
I just think about them.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 it's fun.

Speaker 1 It gets me through the walk. Yeah.

Speaker 1 You get your steps.

Speaker 1 I'm glad to know that in coming up with who Michael Corleone was, you got your steps in. Yeah, there it is.

Speaker 1 I managed not to get hit by a car.

Speaker 1 In those days, they should make a Fitbit that tells you, you have achieved the character.

Speaker 1 10,000 steps and you stop walking.

Speaker 1 Stop now.

Speaker 1 You have nails, Michael Corleon. You've got it.

Speaker 1 Oh, my God. Did you hear I said wow along with myself in the exact same time? Yeah, you did.

Speaker 2 yeah, I think I saw that. And also, I love that it just cuts to you just so you could say, wow.

Speaker 1 I know. What a dork.
But I don't mind because we're in the room with fucking Al Pacino. I know.

Speaker 2 Can you believe that we get to do that?

Speaker 1 Conan's used to this. You and I, we don't, I mean, I guess you got to being his assistant all those years.
Not Al Pacino.

Speaker 2 And also not in this kind of like atmosphere. And you could, I mean, I can tell just from looking at that clip how I was feeling and I was like, just don't say anything.

Speaker 1 Don't move.

Speaker 2 don't do anything dumb.

Speaker 1 It was amazing because he's so nice. I know.
And I was obsessed with The Godfather. One of the first movies I saw was The Godfather 2.
I begged my mom to watch it at a very young age. Like three.

Speaker 1 It's one of my earliest memories of movies. Really? Yeah.

Speaker 2 And it's a three-hour movie.

Speaker 1 I know.

Speaker 2 I can't believe that was like, you watched it early on.

Speaker 1 I would never, I don't know.

Speaker 2 I've, I was watching like goonies.

Speaker 1 What a treat to be in the room with that guy.

Speaker 2 I know. That was really cool.

Speaker 1 Sitting across from Michael Corleone. Yeah.
Amazing. I know.
And then this next guy's no slouch either.

Speaker 2 Yes.

Speaker 1 Thanks for going along.

Speaker 2 You know what? Yeah. Tom Hanks is next.
And I was walking by and he was just standing in the hallway. And somebody introduced me.
I think it was Paula who introduced me to him.

Speaker 2 And then he said, What's the first car you ever drove? And what's the car you're driving now? And it was just such a like, I'm sure that's a question he asks a lot of people just to like.

Speaker 1 He just had that ready to go.

Speaker 2 He had that ready to go. And it was so, it was so cool, but also made me reflect that my first car was like a broken down Jeddah, and now I drive a minivan.
So it's like

Speaker 1 my evolution.

Speaker 1 You seem like a Jeddah girl.

Speaker 2 Oh, I was, I had three Jeddahs before. Yeah, I had, I was a Jeddah girl for sure.
Yeah. Is that a compliment? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Let's, let's take.

Speaker 1 Did you just read the description of it?

Speaker 2 Because I did too.

Speaker 1 Yes. And I think I remember what I say in this.
So let's roll it.

Speaker 1 You scared the hell out of me. I was on a bike with a friend of mine.
I won't get into the exact, but

Speaker 1 on a taking a bike ride with a good friend of mine, Brad, and we're going up this,

Speaker 1 yeah,

Speaker 1 maybe.

Speaker 1 And Brad Paisley.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 suddenly this

Speaker 1 car, like a kind of a Jeep SUV thing starts coming. And all of a sudden, the window comes down

Speaker 1 and you lean out the window and start yelling at me.

Speaker 1 And you start doing some bit, which was really funny, doing a bit. And

Speaker 1 then my friend is like, that was Tom.

Speaker 1 Happens all the time. But you know what? It was like laughing.
Like your head just came out of a

Speaker 1 knock, knock. Yeah.
Or it was like Batman when he was climbing up the side of a building and suddenly a window would open and it's

Speaker 1 you know it's Jerry Lewis. It's Jerry Lewis.
It's Tom Hanks.

Speaker 1 I thought, I live the most amazing life where a darkened window can come down and a goofy Tom Hanks can pop out and yell at me when I'm on a bike.

Speaker 3 But think about everybody else because on that, there's a lot of people that come there to walk that, you know, it's a long line, and they're all kind of like bicycle weenie geeks, you know, guys with $6,000 mountain bikes saying, on your left, you know, as they're

Speaker 3 going up and coming down. But they're going to see you.
I mean, you're as tall as Big Bird for crying out loud. And they're going to say, I believe I saw Conan O'Brien struggling up the hill.

Speaker 1 Have you heard that halfway up that ridge, there's this place that apparently in the late 30s, you probably know about

Speaker 1 in the late 30s, some people who were pro

Speaker 1 Hitler and pro what the Nazis were doing. So Nazis.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay, go ahead.

Speaker 1 They...

Speaker 3 As a lay historian, I'll come in and get the record straight from the time.

Speaker 1 There were members of the party.

Speaker 1 There were people who were

Speaker 1 sympathetic sympathetic to that cause in the late 30s before America was in the war, and they purchased a piece of land. Am I correct? You are correct, sir.
That

Speaker 1 they thought would be

Speaker 1 a place that the Fuhrer would like to hang when and if he comes to America, maybe because he conquered it. I don't know the whole story.
Do you know the story?

Speaker 3 It was owned by the German Bund.

Speaker 3 And there was a period of time, a German Bund, the Bund was essentially, hey, we're all Germans, we we all live America, let's form a fraternal organizations like other nationalities do, you know,

Speaker 1 and

Speaker 1 I'm going to hope that

Speaker 3 before they found out just how bad Hitler was, you know, but they're there, I swear I have seen photographs of like a 4th of July in the 1930s up there with a fireworks thing.

Speaker 3 And they would have, no lie, a picture of the founding fathers and a picture of Adolf Hitler, an American flag and a Nazi flag, the German Nazi flag.

Speaker 3 And they were saying, our country is coming back, et cetera, et cetera. And I just hope that maybe you can get away with that in 1930, you know, but it continued along.

Speaker 3 And in fact, it is now a scout camp, or it had been for a while. And

Speaker 3 I have gone there to scout a location. And there is like the main lodge, you know, there's tents and stuff like that.

Speaker 3 But there is a main lodge that honestly looks like, you know, a German alpine chalet.

Speaker 5 Yeah.

Speaker 3 That all you have to do is paint it red, put a couple of Hawking cruisers on there, and you are right back in Naziville, USA.

Speaker 1 So this is a place that in our neighborhood, you go up this, there's this big hill and

Speaker 3 did I say Jerry Lewis also lived in this neighborhood?

Speaker 1 And why did you choose to live here, sir? Listen, we have these meetings that are none of your business. No, but this is my story, which is that they,

Speaker 1 that was something I've always heard. And then occasionally

Speaker 1 you'll find that it mentioned that this piece of land lives and that maybe, and some people get the story,

Speaker 1 they get it wrong and they think that Hitler spent time there, like in his board shorts, looking out at the Pacific.

Speaker 3 He did come out for pilot season one.

Speaker 1 And he, you know, he needed a place of stake.

Speaker 1 Six pilots didn't get one of them. Not a one.

Speaker 1 It was almost a seventh friend. But anyway,

Speaker 1 but

Speaker 1 I'm with my friend once, my same friend Brad, that you saw. I'm riding, grinding up that hill on our bikes to just try and get to this very steep in parts.
We're grinding along.

Speaker 1 And then we're these two women, like blonde, 22-year-old, I swear to God, wearing like bikini tops.

Speaker 1 Very, and they just look like they would just come from a sorority party. They flag us down like they were in trouble.
And I said, What is it? And they went, do you know where the Hitler camp is?

Speaker 1 There you go. Where's the Hitler camp?

Speaker 1 And I went, oh, ladies, Will, all right? Like, God, he's

Speaker 1 still pulling in the trim, that added Hitler. My God.

Speaker 1 Jesus. Still pulling in the trim.
I know what? Jesus. Wow.

Speaker 1 Jesus, man. Wow.
Come on. Now,

Speaker 3 we are making light of a very, very dark period, without a doubt. So, yeah.
I mean, you don't want to say,

Speaker 3 yeah,

Speaker 3 come on up.

Speaker 3 How do you get to Conan's house? Oh, well, if you, you've gone too far if you hit the Hitler camp.

Speaker 1 Make a U-turn at the Hitler camp.

Speaker 1 When you get to the Mussolini cul-de-sac,

Speaker 1 take a left. Yeah, right, Patton.

Speaker 3 But yeah, that's up there.

Speaker 1 And yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 I'm going to switch gears here real quick.

Speaker 1 Let's see how you do this. And I want to talk

Speaker 1 about the Japanese

Speaker 1 and Jerry Lewis and

Speaker 1 1944.

Speaker 1 One other major thing that happened with Tom Hanks that we have to cover is that he was the second but no less significant A-list celebrity to look diagonally across this table from the chair I'm sitting in right now and tell Aaron Blair to shut the fuck up.

Speaker 1 That's right. Blae, what did that feel like? It's well, I always try to

Speaker 1 shout Blay

Speaker 1 and shut the fuck up. Now there's three A-list celebrities.

Speaker 1 Can I just say a thing very quickly? It's kind of tough for Eduardo and I because we're back, we're out of the limelight. I've been there a couple of times.
I know.

Speaker 1 Except I am in direct eye contact with every celebrity. Or they're looking at me.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 2 You just might think they're looking at me.

Speaker 1 Well, you know what? And they do look at you, but then sometimes they look over at me. They're probably looking at me still.

Speaker 1 They look at you happily and they look at me like, what's happening over here? So when I, whenever I say anything, it's always they immediately want me to shut up because they want to hear from you.

Speaker 2 No, I think there's something about you that makes people think that they could just immediately just be not shitty, but like joke around with you. Like,

Speaker 2 I'm saying this compliment.

Speaker 1 Is that kind of like now and I'll take it? I know you're not. No, I am saying it as a compliment.

Speaker 2 I don't think they feel comfortable saying shut the fuck up to just anybody. So there's something about

Speaker 1 I gotta stop. Thank you.
I don't know. I'm trying to get them looking.
But to answer your question, it's incredible that we get to interact with these people at all.

Speaker 1 So the fact that both Harrison Ford and Tom Hanks told me to shut the fuck up. Amazing.
Truly. I mean, life, life moments.
But there has to be a third. Life moments.

Speaker 1 Well, I think there probably will be. And who's it going to be? We should all take it.
Will it happen organically? Will it be someone that is aware of this?

Speaker 1 That was what I was going to say.

Speaker 6 We don't think that Tom Hanks was aware

Speaker 1 of Harrison Ford telling Blake to shut the fuck up.

Speaker 6 It was just, but it was such a, like, what are the odds that they would use the exact same words?

Speaker 1 Yes. and the best part about when tom hanks did it is we all collectively celebrate

Speaker 1 that's why a third one is gonna blow the roof off this place

Speaker 1 i know what you're saying though about being in the eye line i am in Conan's direct eye line throughout the whole entire interview and I find the more esteemed the guest this is a look behind the curtain here

Speaker 1 the less he will look at the guest and the more he will talk to me which makes me so because I have to do that fuel face where I'm fueling him with with energy and admiration and

Speaker 1 laughs. And it's not like it's not legitimate.
It is, but I'm very conscious of, I've got to keep this guy going. Here I go.
And it's just a hell of a thing.

Speaker 1 Now, see, I feel the same way about the celebrity. And I overdid it, I think, with John Mayer because John Mayer at one point stops and he goes, man, you are really vibing with me right now.

Speaker 1 And I was like, oh my God, oh, no. Like, have I screwed up? Like, you know, because I'm trying to, exactly, exactly.
the same thing. It's, it's, it's like being under a microscope.

Speaker 1 And so I find myself after these podcasts sometimes sometimes drained. Exhausted.
Exhausted. Because you're kind of like an emotional cheerleader.
Yes. And not that, again,

Speaker 1 I absolutely enjoy being here, but

Speaker 1 it is kind of like a sending vibes or just like giving somebody back good energy. And

Speaker 1 but yeah, yeah, I totally agree. But life moments.
They were life highlight moments. I'm anxious to see who's going to be number three.
We're going to be too. I am too.

Speaker 1 This message is brought to you by Square. Your favorite neighborhood spot runs on Square.
You've noticed these products, right? You go into a store, it looks like it's a pop-up or something.

Speaker 1 You think, how am I going to pay for this? And then they just whip out the Square. Yeah.
And you touch your card to it, and you're done. So quick.
Neighborhood businesses aren't just storefronts.

Speaker 1 They're part of daily life. It's the first place you stop in the morning, right? It's probably where you get your mocha china

Speaker 1 or your nut-free drink. Thank you.
You're allergic. Thank you for remembering.
They're the places you stop in without thinking, the spots that feel like, well, I'm going to say an extension of home.

Speaker 1 And so money spent locally, you know, is always good. It's nice.
Stays local, supporting the people who pour their energy back into the community.

Speaker 1 And when we show up as neighbors, it means real opportunity for the business owners who power it all.

Speaker 1 That's why Square partners with more than 4 million businesses around the world, from restaurants, salons, to boutiques, bakeries.

Speaker 1 Square gives them the tools to run smoothly, serve their customers, and grow with confidence. I like those little doodads.
Yeah, that's what I call them. Doodads.

Speaker 1 You can go to square.com/slash go/slash Conan to learn more. But before you do, go support your favorite neighborhood spot.
You'll be happy you did. Square, I'll see you in the neighborhood.

Speaker 1 On eBay, every find has a story. Like if you're looking for a vintage band tee, the one you wore everywhere, I'm telling you, lost it.
Womp, womp. Or your brother Neil burned it.

Speaker 1 Now you're on eBay, and there it is. The things you love have a way of finding their way back to you, especially on eBay.
From rare collectibles and vintage cars to designer fashion, it's all there.

Speaker 1 You can find it if it's out there, and it can be back in your loving arms. Shop eBay for millions of finds, each with a story.
eBay, things, people, love.

Speaker 1 You know me, I love to travel. You love to do it.
Travel the world. I do it

Speaker 1 professionally for my travel show, but I also just like to, sometimes with my wife, go and visit a foreign land and try their different cuisines.

Speaker 1 Enjoy the world. Travel is just better with D-Mobile.
You will not believe what members get on their best plans. They get amazing travel benefits, like free in-flight Wi-Fi.

Speaker 1 I use my Wi-Fi a lot when I'm on a plane. Me too.
And that free in-flight Wi-Fi sounds good to me. A free year of AAA,

Speaker 1 data, and texting in over 215 countries and so many more. I don't have time to mention it.
I just don't have the time.

Speaker 2 I didn't even know there were 215 countries.

Speaker 1 Oh, that's just, well,

Speaker 1 it's not sad. It's not even surprising.

Speaker 1 Anyway, all this just means it doesn't cost 50 bucks to tell your producer that you're lost somewhere in, I don't know, Madagascar, the Maldives, Mesopotamia, Miami.

Speaker 1 T-Mobile's benefits and perks take the stress out of travel. Let them save you from the boredom of long flights.
Plus, you can save with all the freebies and discounts.

Speaker 1 Check it out at t-mobile.com slash travel.

Speaker 1 This next one was very special to us because Carol Burnett is an absolute legend.

Speaker 1 And we went to the Four Seasons Hotel and got to talk to her there. This is a very special story about another absolute legend, Lucille Ball.

Speaker 1 Both of these women were formative in my youth for television and everybody else, I'm sure. But this was an incredible day.

Speaker 2 I know. This was one of those like special days where I was like, I'm going to remember this just forever.
Just being here talking to her, it's amazing. I just,

Speaker 1 oh boy, we better roll it. Someone's going to need to take a break.

Speaker 1 I wanted to ask you about Lucille Ball because

Speaker 1 obviously growing up,

Speaker 1 even though the show had long been gone, it was running constantly in reruns. I Love Lucy, and that was the format for the modern sitcom that has endured for 50, 60 years.

Speaker 1 And I know that she was very kind to you. She saw you as,

Speaker 1 hey, this kid has something. I like her.
How did she reach out to you? Well, how'd you meet her?

Speaker 4 I was doing the off-Broadway show called Once Upon a Mattress.

Speaker 4 And we had just opened the night before. And the second night, there was a lot of buzz I could hear in the audience.
And Lucy was in the audience the second night.

Speaker 4 I remember I peeked through the curtain and I saw this big shock of red hair. And there she was.

Speaker 4 I was more nervous that night than I was opening night, the night before, because she was in the audience.

Speaker 4 Anyway, it went okay.

Speaker 4 And I had this funky little dressing room off Broadway. She knocked on the door after the show and came in.
And I had this couch, and it had a spring coming up.

Speaker 4 And she was going to say, I said, look out, she said, I see it.

Speaker 1 Is it my first rodeo?

Speaker 4 Anyways, we visited for about a half hour, and she said, she called me kid because she was 22 years older.

Speaker 4 She said, if you ever need me for anything, give me a call.

Speaker 4 So about four or five years later, I was doing, I was going to, I did a few things and then CBS was going to give me a special, a one-hour variety thing, if I could get a major guest star.

Speaker 4 So the producer said, Call Lucy.

Speaker 1 I said, Oh, I don't want to bother her.

Speaker 4 He said, Well, all she can do is say, I'd love to, but I can't. I'm busy.

Speaker 4 Got her on the phone, called her office. She came up, hey, kids, you're doing great.
What's happened? I was just,

Speaker 4 I said, Oh, Lucy, I'm doing, I'm, I'm,

Speaker 4 I know you're busy. She said, when do you want me?

Speaker 4 And she did, we did the show together so then when i got my variety show and then i did several guest appearances on her later yes shows yes the lucille ball show and when she played lucy carmichael and all of that gail gordon right yeah right and then when i got my show she came on so we kind of traded on and off and so oh wow

Speaker 4 This one time,

Speaker 4 she's on my show, and we have a dinner break before the orchestra rehearsal. So she and I went over to the farmer's market to have a little.
So we were in the Chinese restaurant there,

Speaker 4 and she's knocking back a couple of whiskey sours.

Speaker 1 Please tell me it's the morning.

Speaker 1 It was a nighttime show. Okay, okay.

Speaker 4 So at that time, of course, my husband, Joe Hamilton, was executive, was producing our show.

Speaker 4 And so she now was

Speaker 4 not with Desi. She said, you know, kid,

Speaker 4 it's great that you got Joe, you know, to handle a lot of stuff for you because when I was married to the Cuban,

Speaker 1 like he's a cigar.

Speaker 1 She said.

Speaker 4 He did everything. Dessey did everything.
He took care of the scripts.

Speaker 1 He took care of the lighting, the camera work.

Speaker 4 He's the one who invented the three cameras. Yes,

Speaker 1 genius. Yeah.

Speaker 4 And

Speaker 4 she said, when I came into

Speaker 4 the Monday morning, you know, the table read, everything was perfect because he had seen to it. And all I had to do is be crazy Lucy, you know, fine.
So then we got a divorce.

Speaker 4 Now I'm going to do the Lucy Karma, whatever it was. And I came in,

Speaker 4 no, Desi, and

Speaker 4 we read the script. And she said, it was awful.

Speaker 1 Kid, it stank.

Speaker 4 And she said, I thought, oh, God, what am I going to do? Desi's not here.

Speaker 4 She called for lunch and she said,

Speaker 4 she went back to her office. She said, I've got to be strong.

Speaker 4 I've got to be, I've got to confront this the way Desi would.

Speaker 4 She said, so I knew what I had to do, went back to the table read.

Speaker 4 And I told them in no uncertain terms how I felt about the script, how we had to fix it.

Speaker 4 She said, and kid, and she took an LO,

Speaker 4 and that's when they put the S on the end of my last name.

Speaker 1 Now, she

Speaker 1 sent you, I think, flowers every day on your birthday.

Speaker 4 On my birthday, and this one birthday, I got up in the morning and turned on the Today show, and she had passed away on my birthday.

Speaker 4 And that afternoon,

Speaker 4 I got flowers that said, Happy birthday, Ken.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 2 So we had a great bond.

Speaker 1 Legend.

Speaker 2 That's amazing.

Speaker 1 Do you remember she came into that room and she, there was probably 15 people in that room.

Speaker 1 She shook everyone's hand, asked for their name, and then after the interview was over, said goodbye to everybody pretty much by name.

Speaker 2 Like a total pro. And also, there are moments when everybody's on their best behavior.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 2 You know, like we're all like dressed a little little nicer. We're all not

Speaker 1 a president of some kind. Yes.

Speaker 2 And yeah, yeah, we had the same amount of gravitas towards her as we would

Speaker 1 a president, a first lady. Yeah.

Speaker 1 All right. This next one is Nisi Nash with a very funny story.

Speaker 1 I've always heard it was your idea to put on the prosthetic fake booty. Is that true? That's a fact.

Speaker 7 That's a fact. Because you know why?

Speaker 7 Because

Speaker 7 the women in my family, I did not see them on TV. You know what I mean? Now you could buy a butt on every corner.
You know what I mean?

Speaker 1 You could buy one on every corner.

Speaker 7 But then it wasn't popular

Speaker 7 to have all of the, you know what I mean? And I went to so many booty fittings, like you don't even understand. And they couldn't get it right because they were building it straight back.

Speaker 7 So I went to my girlfriend and I brought her up there who had you know the natural slam a jama and i'm like you see you got to start from the hips and wrap it around

Speaker 1 so i got the booty right it was really i love that you brought your friend in what was your friend's name

Speaker 1 i don't know if i should say it okay

Speaker 1 i mean it's a compliment but i'm saying to your friend hey come on over here

Speaker 1 i need your ass get your ass over here literally

Speaker 1 get your ass over here.

Speaker 7 Literally.

Speaker 7 And you know, let me tell you something. That friend of mine, true story, her butt

Speaker 7 and my up top was how we got to look Prince right in the face. We didn't have tickets to this Grammy party he was at.
And I, so we went around the side and there was a security guard.

Speaker 7 I said, girl, you know what to do. She started walking backwards.
I started walking forwards. I was like, come on.

Speaker 7 And we walked over there. So he let us in the back door.
So we get in the party. And then we lied and said that I'm always lying to get a job, right?

Speaker 7 We lied and said she was Prince's cousin.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 we go. Oh my God.

Speaker 1 The purple one was behind this door.

Speaker 7 So we knocked, we walked up to security, like, yo, we need to get in there.

Speaker 7 She's like, I'm his cousin. I'm like, yep, she's his cousin.

Speaker 7 And he looked at us up and down. He said, one minute.
He closes the door and goes.

Speaker 1 The door opens.

Speaker 7 It is Prince. He looked at us and before we could take a breath, he said, nice try and closed the door in our face.

Speaker 7 I said, but we got to see him.

Speaker 1 He said, nice try to us.

Speaker 1 That is so cool.

Speaker 7 And I don't even know what that had to do with the booty.

Speaker 1 But the point is,

Speaker 1 she walked backwards.

Speaker 1 She got everything in life. But

Speaker 1 backwards, we deny this card. Oh, yeah? Check this out.
Their card works.

Speaker 2 I'm just so jealous right now.

Speaker 1 Okay, let's talk about this. I have famously, I have no ass.
There's just nothing back there. It's a straight drop.
And I'm thinking I should get a prosthetic.

Speaker 1 Is there something they make for me?

Speaker 2 Make sure it's done right. You should bring a friend in who has the right butt and then have them do it.

Speaker 1 I don't know. I don't know what the right button.
You want me to call my friend? Yeah, exactly. You should come.

Speaker 1 And I should say, I want this.

Speaker 7 But the point I was making is that that butt wasn't popular back then. That body type, not even the butt, just the body type, you know?

Speaker 7 And I wanted to be somebody that my aunties could look at and see themselves. And so I was like, I want to look like the women in my family.
And I have to tell you.

Speaker 7 So many men met me in life after and were so disappointed that I didn't have the thing on. They were like, you lost weight?

Speaker 1 I'm like, no.

Speaker 1 I can go get it.

Speaker 1 It's in the back of the car.

Speaker 1 Yeah, basically. Keep it with me at all.
Yeah, you could borrow hers. Well, I don't, don't they make something for men?

Speaker 2 No, I'm just saying, you could borrow the one she uses for Reno 911.

Speaker 1 All right, maybe I can. Do you have a name for it?

Speaker 1 She nicknamed it.

Speaker 7 I did not.

Speaker 7 But, you know, my prosthetic one, like, I have one that I will wear under the uniform, but the prosthetic one that I wore with the thong bathing suit, that one,

Speaker 1 somebody stole it.

Speaker 1 You bet they did. It was in a temperature control locker somewhere.

Speaker 1 If I knew where that was, I'd grab it.

Speaker 1 I'd take it on vacation.

Speaker 1 What are you going to do? I don't want to talk about what I'm going to do to it.

Speaker 1 That's my business.

Speaker 1 So you're invading my privacy right now.

Speaker 1 I buy two airline tickets and the prosthetic ass ass is in the other one and we both have a glass of champagne.

Speaker 1 Oh my god.

Speaker 2 Can I tell you, I love Nisi Nash and I love Reno 911 and I had no idea that was a fake butt until that conversation.

Speaker 1 And between that and Conan's story about Prince, which he's told a few times on the show, right before he went on stage, the more I hear about that little guy,

Speaker 1 that little guy. He's very little.

Speaker 2 He is, I know.

Speaker 1 He's just a mischief maker.

Speaker 1 Someone just told me a story that he was at a huge gala party, just as a guest, stood up on a table and hopped from table to table to table to the exit as if it was just all happening spontaneously.

Speaker 1 But then, if you did any further looking down, you saw all of his people were prepared with their hands clasped together to be his little bridge from table to table to table.

Speaker 2 So he like talked about it before.

Speaker 1 With them. This had been planned, but it was all made to seem spontaneous.

Speaker 1 This is also coming like third, fourth degree. Who knows if it's true, but imprint the legend.
Oh, to me.

Speaker 2 Man, that's awesome. I loved when Nici Nash was here because I've always loved, loved Reno 911.
Me too. And just, she was just like, she had that energy the whole time.
You really missed out.

Speaker 2 It was so much fun. You really, really missed out.

Speaker 2 Do you ever... Yes.
I hate missing recalls.

Speaker 1 I do too.

Speaker 1 I missed Billy Crystal, Jon Stewart, because I had to go back and see my family. And you just, you know, you, you curse your family.

Speaker 2 Do you?

Speaker 2 I really don't have much going on besides this. So I just, I, I really don't miss very many, but I have missed a couple and I always have big time FOMO.

Speaker 1 There was one.

Speaker 2 I remember I was just like, I wish I was here for you.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you're almost always here. I don't have a ton of FOMO in my life.
If anything, I have a fear of not missing out. Of

Speaker 1 being a fear of being included. Oh,

Speaker 1 a fob?

Speaker 1 Yes, that's the one.

Speaker 2 But FOBI, where did the J come from?

Speaker 1 It's a soft G.

Speaker 1 So, well, I did not miss this next one, which I am very glad for because this was a really funny guest and a really funny story.

Speaker 2 I have to say, when we find out who gets booked on this show,

Speaker 2 there's an email sent to all of us just being like, this person got booked on this day. And it's very rare for me to respond and just be like, I'm really excited, even though I am.

Speaker 2 But this one, I replied to everybody on the email, including I think probably SiriusXM employees and like a lot of other executives who don't care about my opinion guessed himself

Speaker 2 and I was just like I cannot wait for this episode I think you said something like little baby billy no that wasn't me I forgot what I said I can't remember but I feel like you said little baby billy I don't know yeah but then everybody else started responding it's like it every single person was excited about this you responded when I saw this booking, I gasped.

Speaker 1 That's right. That's right.
That's what I feel. So this is Walton Goggins.
Anticlimactic.

Speaker 1 You've played so many great characters, but in The Righteous Gemstones, I feel like the minute I started watching that show, and then you showed up, I remember not knowing you were going to be in the show for some reason.

Speaker 1 And the minute you show up, I thought, you can't do The Righteous Gemstones without Walton Goggins. You have to have him.

Speaker 5 Did I tell you this story about the David Gordon Green was directing that episode? And the very first time you meet Baby Billy, he's in a bathtub.

Speaker 1 No, I know this.

Speaker 1 He's in a hot tub.

Speaker 5 Yeah, yeah, hot tub, bathtub outside, looking out over his land, looking out over his empire.

Speaker 5 And at some point in the scene, he stands up and

Speaker 5 he's fully naked.

Speaker 1 The viewer sees.

Speaker 5 The viewer sees everything. And then he turns around, he puts on his bathrobe and then steps out of the bathtub.
Well, they called in a body double to do that

Speaker 5 who was 76, 78 years old, something like that,

Speaker 5 to be in the tub, right? And they flew him in from Chicago. And I'm like, how did you...

Speaker 1 What's the audition process?

Speaker 5 You couldn't find him in South Carolina? Really? You had to go to Chicago?

Speaker 3 So he comes in and I immediately...

Speaker 1 You had to go to Chicago to find a dick? Yeah.

Speaker 1 This guy's top of his game. Yeah.
You have to understand of his game.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 5 I met him on that day and he was dressed like me, kind of looked like me. And I'm thinking like, who, who are you? He said, I'm you.
You know, I'm your body dub. I'm standing in for you.

Speaker 5 And it's like, oh, okay.

Speaker 1 Cut to the show comes out.

Speaker 5 There it is. And I get a phone call from this friend of mine who says, oh my God, baby Billy Freeman, I just,

Speaker 5 I can't stand it. I love it so much.
And can I just say how good your body looks?

Speaker 1 And I said, what the fuck are you talking about? He's 76. 76 years old.
You think that's my fucking body?

Speaker 1 True story. I did wonder.

Speaker 1 Because the penis is right there. Penis is right there.
In high definition. Yeah, that's right.
Beautifully lit. I mean, it is not.
It's not. It's a nice penis.
I mean, it's a nice penis.

Speaker 1 I don't know. It's Chicago penis.
Yeah, Chicago. You can tell.
tell. And you know what? Southside.
Deep dish. That's a south side penis.
Deep dish. Deep dish, southside.
That's a White Sox penis.

Speaker 1 That's not a Cubs penis.

Speaker 5 Does not have a Southern accent.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Oh, very, very Yankee.

Speaker 1 It's going, what's going on here? What are we doing here down south? Penis, shut up. You're ruining it.

Speaker 1 I just got out of a hot tub.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Got to get a sausage.

Speaker 2 Oh, I love him.

Speaker 2 Did you watch Vice Principles?

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 1 Can I just say a thing where I, like you, Sono, I love Walton Goggins. He's one of my favorite people.

Speaker 1 And sometimes when celebrities get here, I get to just say a few words to them as they come up the stairs. And I had to tell Walton Goggins this.
He comes up. He's very nice.

Speaker 1 I shake his hand and we're talking for a second. And I go, you know, I have to say, you have a gin, right? He goes, well, yes, I do.
And I was like,

Speaker 1 my old boss and I, Dan Ferguson, got very drunk one night on your gin and it was delicious. And he put his hand on my chest and goes, Well, then may I just say, You are welcome for your inebriation.

Speaker 1 And I was like, oh my God. It's like a blessing.
You've been baptized into

Speaker 1 the

Speaker 1 most charming man ever. Just

Speaker 1 dripping with charm. Just dripping.

Speaker 2 I love him. Yeah.
I think I love every single role he's in. And if I hear he's in something, I will watch it.

Speaker 1 He's one of those actors. Yeah.

Speaker 2 That's true. Yeah.
That's why I watched Fallout, even though I never knew anything about the video game i watched

Speaker 2 serious in that right he hasn't like barely a face yeah

Speaker 1 right what's wrong he's not he's not he's serious but he's he's the villain yeah he's anti yeah yeah yeah but if you haven't watched you you should it's really good okay yeah

Speaker 1 Hey, Sona, I heard you got a new car. Yeah.
You know, David usually gives me a ride to work, but I'd love it if you.

Speaker 2 No, no, no, you're not. I'm sorry.
You're not allowed in my new car.

Speaker 2 My Palisade is my oasis, it's my happy place, so you're not allowed in the wait a minute.

Speaker 1 What are you talking about? I made you. You, when I found you, you were wandering the streets with a bucket on your head.
What? And now you're Sonoma Obsession and you're driving around the Palisade.

Speaker 1 You won't give me a ride.

Speaker 2 This is why I don't let you in my happy place because you talk about me walking around with a bucket on my head. Why would I let you into my personal oasis if this is the way you're going to talk?

Speaker 1 You have to earn your spot. Well, earn it in my Hyundai Pisis.
The all-new Hyundai Palisade hybrid is more than just another SUV.

Speaker 1 It's still the Palisade, but with so much more, like up to 600 plus miles of range. That's incredible.
Yeah, it is. And class-leading interior space.
So much space.

Speaker 1 Now, have you enjoyed that extra space?

Speaker 2 I'm being very serious right now. If you recline the seat all the way back, a little ottoman pops up so you can sleep comfortably in the front seat.

Speaker 1 That's insane. Yeah.
There are seating configurations for seven to eight passengers with available third-row power seats that recline plus available front and second row relaxation seats.

Speaker 1 Learn more about the Hyundai Palisade at hyundaiusa.com. Call 562-314-4603 for complete details.

Speaker 1 I was up half the night last night watching a World Series game. Yeah.
It was very exciting.

Speaker 1 I have to tell you, I don't care what your sport is, tailgates or watching parties or, you know, whatever, if you're watching High Lie,

Speaker 1 it doesn't matter. It is Miller time.
Miller Light is brewed with simple ingredients like malted barley for rich flavor and golden color.

Speaker 1 It's a taste you can depend on because Miller time is always a good time. I'm out there throwing the pig skin around.
I used to just throw pig skin. Really? Chunks of pig skin.
Wow.

Speaker 1 I never had a football. Where would you find the pig? Oh, I went to a farmer.
Oh, good. Yeah.
And the pig had fallen and it was shredded.

Speaker 1 Anyway, back to Miller Light. I like just hawking pig skin around.
I like to raise a Miller Light in the air and celebrate a great pass,

Speaker 1 throwing chunks of pig skin around.

Speaker 1 One of those nail biters. Last night's game, incredible nail biter with the Dodgers.
Incredible. So, anyway, Miller Light, great taste, 96 calories.

Speaker 1 Go to Merrill Light.com/slash Conan to find delivery options near you, or you can pick up some Merrill Light pretty much anywhere they sell beer.

Speaker 1 And if they don't sell Merrill Light, turn to them and say, Sir, you do not sell beer. It's Miller time.

Speaker 1 Celebrate responsibly, Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin, 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.

Speaker 1 Well, next up are two of the most lovable people that you'll have on this show. I think Ted Danson and Woody Harrelson.
Yeah. In a very special circumstance.

Speaker 1 I think it gets explained in the clip, probably.

Speaker 1 But what a way to kick off this episode.

Speaker 2 I know. We were all waiting for Woody to get here, and he explains it in this clip, right? I mean, that's what the clip is.

Speaker 1 But I think anybody, even Woody, probably would say. It's probably not uncommon to sit and wait around for Woody Harrelson because he lives on a different clock, clock, time zone, planet, or whatever.

Speaker 1 But this was a very special reason. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Let's watch.

Speaker 1 I think we should address the elephant in the room. Woody, we started a little bit later than we thought because you had a bit of a tumble.
Is it fair to call it a tumble?

Speaker 1 I think a tumble is a fair term. Yeah.
Did go over my handlebars. You went over the handlebars?

Speaker 1 I was honestly and embarrassingly. I was passing this Tesla on the left that I felt was moving a little slow but I didn't realize he was moving slow because he's taking a left

Speaker 1 yes and you're on a motorcycle on a motorcycle yes and is that your primary way of getting around a motorcycle well I always feel like the shortest distance between two lines between two points in

Speaker 1 LA is a motorcycle.

Speaker 1 So I do tend to take it. But today it proved not to be so very fast in terms of

Speaker 1 we lost some time while people were figuring out, are you alive?

Speaker 1 Your soul had to re-enter your body. Yeah.
Did you think for a second when you were going over the hood of the Tesla, this is going to be a huge problem?

Speaker 1 Or did you, the whole time, were you thinking, I'm all right?

Speaker 1 No, I always thought I'd be okay. I just felt like there was some pain involved.
I felt the pain,

Speaker 1 but I never thought I'd be, you know, killed or anything. Okay.

Speaker 1 And you're

Speaker 1 your hand is wrapped up like someone in a cartoon. That's because I wrapped it.
You did it.

Speaker 1 Is this true? You wrapped it? You wrapped it in. I thought it looked funnier that way.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 let me get this straight. All of your first aid training is helping people in a way that will look funny.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 It's not going to help him not get infected or anything like that.

Speaker 1 You didn't set the bones in the proper way. You just set them in the funny way.
Funny way.

Speaker 1 And we're in the bathroom, and I'm like,

Speaker 1 you played a a doctor, right? And he says, yeah, I also played a lawyer so we can sue the guy.

Speaker 1 Well, I think it's going to have to be a lawyer for the defense.

Speaker 1 I'm not as good with that. Sorry.
So this is fascinating just to be behind the scenes and know that you guys are both icons. You're on the way to do the podcast with your friend Ted Danson.

Speaker 1 You wipe out on the motorcycle. You hit a Tesla.
You get it together. You come here.
You need medical attention. So Ted Danson is the one that helps clean the wound and wrap you.
Yes.

Speaker 1 Why have we called a real doctor at any point?

Speaker 2 I take Ted Danson over a real doctor.

Speaker 1 Thank you very much. By the way, his confidence, his demeanor, everything about the way he does it is you feel like, yes, I'm in the best hands.

Speaker 1 Never doubted. I did kind of have that.
I was choking back tears, but I was efficient.

Speaker 1 First of all, I'm very happy that you're okay.

Speaker 1 I'm scared when he asked me to disrobe, but I'm going to

Speaker 1 hygienic

Speaker 1 purposes. It's for hygienic and also tax purposes.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 do you wear, what kind of protection do you wear when you wear it? Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Speaker 1 No, no, no.

Speaker 1 We're not doing that protection, the other protection. Are you armored in any way? Are you wearing a helmet?

Speaker 1 I was wearing a helmet. Okay.

Speaker 1 And so

Speaker 1 actually, it did help me because I did hit my head, but the helmet, so no problem. Okay, good.
What are you at?

Speaker 1 This makes me sad, buddy. Really? Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 Don't be sad. I am.
I'm sad. I'm sad.
And why?

Speaker 1 Because you've been hurt badly. Badly.
That makes me sad.

Speaker 1 Does it inform what you might do in the future? Might you. No, that's out of the question, I'm sure.

Speaker 1 It should. It certainly should.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 But this is how you are, right? You live in life on the edge. Yeah, maybe, maybe, yeah, right.

Speaker 1 In other words, maybe I should just slow down in life and just take you to live. Hey, you're doing great.
You skinned your hand. Man up.

Speaker 1 Sorry. I'm switching.
I'm switched. You just switched.
I had my cheering moment. Sorry.
Literally, 15 seconds ago, you said, I'm so sad. I'm so sad.
My boyfriend and I'm so sad.

Speaker 1 And then you're telling him to shut the fuck up. Right.

Speaker 1 My sadness didn't play in the room.

Speaker 1 You thought about me going slower.

Speaker 1 My sadness didn't play in the room. That is such a sick thing to say.

Speaker 1 Such a sick thing to say. Oh, wow.
We're here in the ward with the terminally ill children. Hope you guys feel better soon.

Speaker 1 Tough break. Hey, that didn't play so well.
Let me try something else.

Speaker 1 Hey, Timmy, how long you got?

Speaker 1 Jesus Christ, Ted.

Speaker 1 I know what you mean, though, Woody. There's something about Ted.

Speaker 1 Every time I've talked to him, see him out in the world, I'm immediately, I just get this calm. You have a very calming presence.

Speaker 1 And I don't, yes, is some of it maybe related to the fact that you are so ubiquitous and know well, well known? Yes. But

Speaker 1 do other people say that? You just, you'd be like an amazing therapist. You know, I'm doing these moderate to severe plaques

Speaker 1 commercials, which I think tells you all you need to know that under this,

Speaker 1 I am, by the way.

Speaker 1 Yeah. You can calm other people, but there's no calmness.
There's no calm interior. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Now, do you suffer from this malady or is they just money is too much to trust? I live on the edge of fear, basically. Oh,

Speaker 1 yes. I remember you sitting me down once on during cheers and I think I was about to get divorced or something.
And he said, Teddy, why are you so fearful?

Speaker 1 Stuck in my head all the time. And that's what I find amazing.
You may have fear and all of that, but you take such big chunks out of life. And I love that.
And yourself, apparently.

Speaker 1 I lost a job

Speaker 1 and Larchmont.

Speaker 1 Is this on camera, by the way?

Speaker 1 I think we're going to see this. It's comical.

Speaker 1 That's the thing one of the three stooges would put on their heads if they had a headache.

Speaker 1 Does anyone have an ice bag? I haven't seen an ice pack like that in 50. It's a bad idea, though.

Speaker 1 Does it look cool? Oh, yeah. It looks really cool.

Speaker 1 What you can't see is, didn't he also have his leg propped up?

Speaker 1 And listeners can go to the Team Coco YouTube channel and see these clips because often the clips themselves are longer as well than what you're hearing today.

Speaker 1 But this one, because also they're drinking large glasses of watermelon juice. Yeah.
Or like strawberry agua fresco or something. It's just watermelon juice.

Speaker 6 They get it for every recording they do of their podcast. So that, you know, they do a podcast here where everybody knows your name with Ted Danson and Woody Harrelson sometimes is the title.

Speaker 6 And yeah, they get these watermelon juices.

Speaker 1 They both like watermelon watermelon juice. I think that's a dope.

Speaker 6 One of them turned the other one on to it.

Speaker 1 And then they're like, Woody turned Ted on. I think that's right.

Speaker 6 But I will say that they have this like odd couple dynamic that is really special. And there's just like, they just love each other like brothers.

Speaker 6 And it's a good plug for the other podcast because the other, if you like them together, and I can't imagine anyone doesn't, the other podcast is really, really great.

Speaker 2 Do you ever, after we leave, are you like, I want to be friends with you so bad? Oh, yeah.

Speaker 2 I feel every once in a while, someone will come in and they'll leave and I'll be like, we could be, we could have such a good friendship together. I thought about that with Mila Kunis.

Speaker 2 I thought about that with a few other people,

Speaker 2 but Mila Kunis jumps out because we, I feel like we really bonded when she came on here. But with them, I really just like would love to just go to dinner parties with them and just be friends.

Speaker 6 You know, Woody invited. our team, a handful of us went to his, to his dispensary when the show launched.

Speaker 1 Oh, really? Oh, my God. I let it go.
One of my favorite memories of that night was apparently what he really loves magic. And so he had magician bartenders.
So you'd order a drink and they'd be like,

Speaker 1 and then it would like appear or whatever. And it was really cool, except as the night goes on and an open bar, you kind of just want your drink.

Speaker 1 And so you're like, cool, that's great. And you're like flipping the bottle around like, and then fire.
And oh my God. And you're like, cool.
That's, oh, man. Okay.
Oh, great. Oh, that's so cool.

Speaker 1 Oh, man. Okay, cool.
Thank you for the drink. so we ended up ordering like several at once just so you could kind of.
So he's not doing those now you see me movies for a paycheck.

Speaker 1 It's out of love of the day. I honestly,

Speaker 1 I feel like it's a passion. It was, it was one of the coolest nights.
And that dispensary is, it's got a whole big garden in the back. It's beautiful.

Speaker 6 We should do a field trip there. Really?

Speaker 1 We should move our studio to that dispensary and just start recording there. I would love to.
All right.

Speaker 1 Well, we're going to close this out with the Larry David clip that, man, this whole interview is one of the funniest we've had. Yeah.

Speaker 2 And this moment is a very curb your enthusiasm, Larry David moment.

Speaker 1 Like very much.

Speaker 2 You're just like, this would be a plot point in curb.

Speaker 1 You know,

Speaker 1 people ask me all the time,

Speaker 1 they say to me, Conan, you know everyone in the business. And I say, thank you.
And then they say,

Speaker 1 Larry David, is he exactly like he is on Curb Your Enthusiasm? And I say, yes, he is. You are exactly like that guy.

Speaker 1 You would claim that you're not quite that guy, but the times I've hung out with you at parties, I feel there might as well be a camera recording this for HBO. You are the same guy.

Speaker 1 You know, I take that as a tremendous compliment. Yes.
Because

Speaker 1 I got to tell you something. I love that guy.

Speaker 1 That guy.

Speaker 1 Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 I am so in love with that guy. Yeah.
Really?

Speaker 1 He's my hero. Yeah.
He should be. Yeah.
It must be nice, though, because you've carved that out for yourself.

Speaker 1 And then if people encounter you in real life, you don't have to in any way contort yourself to please them. Yes.
You can tell them, I don't feel like taking a selfie.

Speaker 1 It's not really what I want to do right now. And

Speaker 1 they must love it. And they laugh.
And they laugh. Except a couple of weeks ago, I got invited to a dinner party.

Speaker 1 And,

Speaker 1 you know, 10, 5, 10 years ago, I would have gone, okay, okay, yeah, okay, it sounds good. What's the address?

Speaker 1 And now, this time I said, who's coming? Oh.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 It did not go over well.

Speaker 1 The person was offended? The person seemed to have been a little offended.

Speaker 1 and uh, I wound up not going, yeah.

Speaker 1 So, there you go,

Speaker 1 so there you go. So,

Speaker 1 I did, uh, I tried to be Larry, and it didn't work.

Speaker 1 Uh, well, but by the way, as long as we're on the subject, is it such a terrible question to ask who's going to why? Why is it such a secret? Why is that a secret?

Speaker 1 I don't understand, I don't understand the big secret.

Speaker 1 You can't say who's who's going.

Speaker 1 Why?

Speaker 1 I don't get it. Yes.
I think that's, I think you're right.

Speaker 1 I think you are within your rights to ask who's coming. Thank you.
Thank you. Because you want to find out.
Also, I'm imagining you have enemies.

Speaker 1 And, you know, you want to make sure you're not walking into a party. I just made four more as I walked into the building.

Speaker 1 But, you know, you want to make sure. You want to know.
Yeah. Yeah.
I want to know. It's like a mobster who's going to a restaurant wants to know how many ways are there in,

Speaker 1 you know,

Speaker 1 if there's, if I'm attacked, is there a way out? You got to know. Exactly.
Because a lot of times, honestly, you'll be invited to these dinner parties and you find yourself sitting next to

Speaker 1 some insurance salesman. And, you know, you're there the whole two and a half hours and sitting next to him or her, whatever.
Yeah. It's not comfortable.
Let me ask you a question.

Speaker 1 And I want you to be honest.

Speaker 1 You came to my house not long ago. You didn't know who was going to be there.
Were you pleased? Were you not pleased? And you can tell me. Well,

Speaker 1 were there enough celebrities to make you comfortable? Were there two, were there, you know, did you feel that it was a good environment, a good ecosystem for you?

Speaker 1 I need like three comedians and I'm fine. Right.
Right.

Speaker 1 Do I count as a comedian?

Speaker 1 Oh, Conan.

Speaker 1 Conan. Conan.

Speaker 1 Poor Conan. Oh, Conan.

Speaker 1 It's just sad.

Speaker 1 You're so sad. Don't do this today.

Speaker 1 Come on.

Speaker 1 Yes, Connor. Thank you.

Speaker 1 Well, I wasn't sure. You know, you seemed happy.

Speaker 1 You seemed pleased. But then at one point, comedians, comedy writers,

Speaker 1 either one.

Speaker 1 But at one point, I noticed that you had retreated to a separate area and you were just observing. You were eating your food and you were just observing other people

Speaker 1 as if you were

Speaker 1 looking at birds.

Speaker 1 And you were doing little sketches. And I wondered if that's normal behavior for you.
I'll tell you what. I don't like sitting with a plate on my lap.
Right. Okay.
Right.

Speaker 1 And I saw there was a counter, there were stools in front of the counter. And I thought this would be a good spot to plant myself.

Speaker 1 Yeah. And so I planted.
And

Speaker 1 it turned out to be a great spot because when people come over,

Speaker 1 this is what I do at parties, by the way. I always sit.

Speaker 1 You can't be in the middle of a room making small talk.

Speaker 1 and then you're going, your brain is racing, you know. Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 Oh, my God. I'm out.
I can't. I got nothing.

Speaker 1 I got nothing.

Speaker 1 What? The bathroom? Do I have to go to the bathroom?

Speaker 1 Do I have to get a drink?

Speaker 1 Or I know I'll do TV Larry.

Speaker 1 I'll do TV Larry.

Speaker 1 All right. Well, it's been nice talking to you.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 And And then you move on. Right.
I think people know now that you can't have interminable conversations.

Speaker 1 It can't go on forever.

Speaker 1 There's got to be an out.

Speaker 1 There's got to be an out. You know what? You're on a podcast right now.
How long is it in ago?

Speaker 1 You made me dumb. This is our special five-hour salute.
No, but it's not. It's a special five-hour salute to Larry Davis.
But I think I have an idea for parties. I have an idea for parties.

Speaker 1 You have a party sheriff, okay?

Speaker 1 And he sits,

Speaker 1 he's in a chair above the party. He's overseeing the party.
Yep, like a lifeguard. Like a lifeguard.
Or he's in another room on video. Yeah.
And he's got cameras on everybody. Like a pit boss.

Speaker 1 Yeah, like a pit boss. And he's seeing the conversations.
He's looking at him. He's seeing how it's going.
He's looking at the body language. He's timing conversations.

Speaker 1 And then

Speaker 1 he sees that somebody's in trouble. And he goes, okay, all right, I got to go.
He goes down.

Speaker 1 He takes the person by the arm. He goes, excuse me, this is over.

Speaker 1 This is brilliant. This is brilliant.
I have to have this. I have to have this.
I mean, this is a great idea. It's brilliant.
It's fantastic. Thank you.
Thank you. I love that idea.

Speaker 1 I think we've all been there.

Speaker 2 He doesn't even pretend to take, hey, I need to talk to you about some of the things. No, no, no, no, no.

Speaker 1 No,

Speaker 1 everybody's a woman. Also, does he flash a badge? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Does he put up a badge and say, This is over? This is over. Everybody's aware there's a sheriff.
There's a, you know, there's somebody

Speaker 1 overseeing the party. By the way, I think I'd be a good one.
You'd be great. I'd like to volunteer.
Oh, I could do that job. We need a podcast sheriff.
You could do that.

Speaker 1 I definitely could do that job, a party sheriff, for sure.

Speaker 6 I have to say, I happened to be at a party with Larry David last week.

Speaker 6 Doesn't happen often at all. Maybe never, has never happened really.
And I did talk to him and I basically just went up to him and said, you know, how much fun we all had when he was here.

Speaker 6 And he was very, very kind and said

Speaker 6 that this was his favorite.

Speaker 6 I don't know if he should say favorite podcast or favorite talk show he's ever done, which I believe when he says, because I don't think he would, you know, just say that to me.

Speaker 1 It wasn't going to immense words.

Speaker 1 But the whole time in the back of my mind, I was conscious of making sure I didn't talk too long and this being like i'm just going to say hi and then be done because i don't want the party sheriff to get me yeah i mean what happens when you go too long with the actual party who sheriffs the party sheriff that's a great question i think he would have just said like great talking to you

Speaker 1 and then like yeah time to go well the podcast sheriff has said it's time for us to wrap this up yep yeah yep and um

Speaker 1 we'll be back next time with conan right that's right we'll be back with a regular episode next week and like i said you can go to the Team Coco YouTube channel to see all these clips in their full lengths.

Speaker 1 And this has been a fun diversion. We're sorry for the circumstances and sending love to our boss.

Speaker 2 Yes, we are sending a lot of love to all the O'Briens and the Reardons on the East Coast. It's all of Conan's whole family is out there.
And yeah,

Speaker 2 it's a really hard time, but also they lived very long, very beautiful lives, made a huge impact on everybody and made a huge impact in their fields. And they're going to be missed.

Speaker 2 And I mean, this is the end of the year, too, really, isn't it?

Speaker 1 I know. It's the holidays.
And everybody, take it easy out there and enjoy yourselves. And we'll start fresh next year with good attitudes.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Good attitudes.

Speaker 2 Because we usually have bad attitudes.

Speaker 1 I don't know. Why are you questioning? I'm sorry.

Speaker 2 I was just, it was an odd thing to say. But yeah, 20, 2025, here we come.

Speaker 2 Happy holidays map happy holidays sona you know you're like my sister you know what i you feel i feel like we have a brother sister relationship now yeah we've been doing this for a while and you're you're my favorite part of this podcast oh same here you know what just like sitting across and looking at you whenever conan says something silly

Speaker 1 every three seconds all the time we're just like two kids in church just like making each other giggle i don't know what i would do without you i wouldn't have made it this far without you you would have been fine no way no way you would have been okay you're my rock.

Speaker 1 Oh, well, that's nice. I'm quitting next week.
Okay.

Speaker 1 So am I then.

Speaker 1 All right. And thank you to Adam, Eduardo, and Blay.
I know. You guys make this happen.
Literally, Adam, you make this happen. Yeah.

Speaker 2 We have a good team.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we do.

Speaker 1 Why do we need that other guy? I don't.

Speaker 1 We do.

Speaker 1 I just don't want to.

Speaker 2 I don't want to sit in this chair again.

Speaker 1 No, it's weird.

Speaker 2 There's something about this chair that makes me uneasy. I like being over in the corner, just like not saying anything.

Speaker 1 That's right.

Speaker 1 Okay, happy new year, everybody. Mm-hmm.
New Year.

Speaker 1 Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend with Conan O'Brien, Sonam Ovesian, and Matt Gorley. Produced by me, Matt Gorley.
Executive produced by Adam Sachs, Jeff Frost, and Nick Liao.

Speaker 1 Theme song by The White Stripes. Incidental music by Jimmy Vivino.
Take it away, Jimmy.

Speaker 1 Our supervising producer is Aaron Blair, and our associate talent producer is Jennifer Samples. Engineering and Mixing by Eduardo Perez and Brendan Burns.

Speaker 1 Additional production support by Mars Melnick. Talent Booking by Paula Davis, Gina Batista, and Britt Kahn.

Speaker 1 You can rate and review this show on Apple Podcasts, and you might find your review read on a future episode. Got a question for Conan? Call the Team Cocoa Hotline at 669-587-2847 and leave a message.

Speaker 1 It too could be featured on a future episode. You can also get three free months of SiriusXM when you sign up at seriousxm.com Conan.

Speaker 1 And if you haven't already, please subscribe to Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend wherever fine podcasts are downloaded.

Speaker 2 JBL wireless earbuds are packed with innovation.

Speaker 2 Touchscreen smart charging case for one touch control.

Speaker 2 Instant EQ customization.

Speaker 2 True adaptive noise cancellation. And a one-of-a-kind audio transmitter to plug and play from almost any source.
Plus, spatial 360 sound on anything.

Speaker 2 The new JVL wireless earbuds.

Speaker 2 Adobe Acrobat Studio, so brand new. Show me all the things PDFs can do.
Do your work with ease and speed. PDF spaces is all you need.
Do hours of research in an instant.

Speaker 2 With key insights from an AI assistant. Pick a template with a click.
Now your prezzo looks super slick. Close that deal, yeah, you won.
Do that, doing that, did that, done.

Speaker 1 Now you can do that, do that, with Acrobat.

Speaker 2 Now you can do that, do that, with the all-new Acrobat. It's time to do your best work with the all-new Adobe Acrobat Studio.