Sexual Communication: The Future of Good Sex I Dr. Tara DSH #462

I ask that question all the time in my class and I teach sexual communication 16 weeks of like sexuality starting from history of sexuality to the future of sex with technology.

I always ask my students like okay let's rate your sexual wellness now.

How good is your sex life from your own opinion from one to ten?

People are always like well

like five.

Wow there's a lot of people that are not having good sex at all.

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All right, we got a sex expert here that I'm excited to learn from you.

Dr.

Tara, thanks for coming on.

Hi, are you having an orgasmic day?

No

today, but looking to have some more.

So

I'm about to get enlightened, I think.

How did you get into this kind of work?

Well, I'm a sex professor.

How I got into this kind of work is I got my master's, got my PhD, and then, you know, I landed my dream job as a tenured track professor at Cal State Fullerton and then earned tenure as one of the youngest professors on campus.

Wow.

And now as a tenured professor, I started my private practice for sex and relationship coaching and started doing content and the TV show last year.

That's cool to see the university let you do this content because I feel like back then that was kind kind of looked down on.

Yeah, well, I'm tenured.

So

what does tenure mean?

You're there for a certain amount of years, no matter what?

That they can't fire me.

Yeah, so yeah, the tenure system is around the world, but it's enacted much more often in the United States where you have professors that are doing research, publishing, and teaching and doing service, like advising students and graduate students.

And those are typically tenure-track professors.

And then there are like lecturers and adjunct professors that kind of just come in and teach.

Got it.

So, in a university system, like the bureaucracy, or I guess the ladder that you go on, that you climb is the tenure track.

And then getting tenure and promotion would be what professors

want to achieve.

I love that.

So, becoming a professor was always a goal of yours when you were growing up?

You know, no.

I was always into business.

I was going to go home and back to Thailand and help my family with like business.

But

I came to the, well, let's like, I'll start from, I grew up in Thailand.

Yeah.

And I grew up, you know, very religious as a Buddhist.

And I was going to an all-girls private Catholic school.

And there,

I've, I was experiencing like a lot of shame towards like being a girl and like covering my body.

Cause in our schools, you have to cover your knees, you have to cover your wrists

in order to not like provoke, you know, men or be sexual.

So like I grew up in that kind of environment.

But then after I finished middle school, my parents

sent me to Finland.

So I went to high school in Finland.

And that was when I was exposed to a much more

sex positive and body neutrality.

in Finland because people just get naked and go into saunas.

Like you can see your grandpa's balls and it's fine.

Wow.

Yeah, it's completely normal because they practice like body neutrality.

It's not like celebrate all bodies.

Like, we're all beautiful.

It's not like that.

It's very stoic.

It's very like bodies are just bodies.

We don't care.

And they all go into saunas naked together.

Men and female?

Yeah, yeah.

And family.

So like you can see your grandpa's balls.

That is normal.

So that was when I was exposed to a more like sex positive, like body neutral environment.

And I loved it.

I loved the freedom.

I love the exploration.

Then I came to the U.S.

and I did my higher education in the U.S.

and I first lived in LA.

I love it because LA is one of the most sexually liberated places in the world.

You know, minus like Amsterdam.

But LA, New York, amazing.

Like people are open to exploration, open to talking about sex.

So I was inspired.

But really, what

truly changed my life

was

basically

my rock bottom of getting a divorce and going through a sexless marriage.

That it was then I realized, like,

damn, like, this is not the life I wanted.

And

I wanted to change.

I want my life to be fulfilling.

I want it to be fun.

I wanted it to be explorative.

So, I was like, you know, I have to get a divorce.

And that was everything changed after that.

I decided to experiment with like everything and studied everything and really just like dive into the ocean of sexuality.

And here I am, you know.

Yeah, here you are.

We'll dive into some of those stories, but I want to talk about how you got to a sexless point in that marriage.

Was it the day you got married, or was it kind of a gradual buildup?

Yeah, so this is what I always want to tell people that are currently dating.

Like, lists don't matter.

I had a list, I found a man that matched everything on that list, but we never had chemistry.

We never had sexual tension.

And I was blinded by my cultural expectations of marrying a quote-unquote good man.

And I didn't think about like having that passion was going to be so important for me.

I just thought, I just need a good man and I need to get married because I was in my late 20s and my parents are like, you should get married.

Right?

Being Asian and my friends from back home, they're all married at like 25.

So, you know, by like 27, I was like, oh, I'm late.

I got to get married.

And being someone who loves like achieving, I'm like, okay, this is the part of my life that's not going the way that is expected.

So I must get married.

I met this guy, my ex-husband, on Tinder and like six months later, we're married.

Damn, that was fast.

Because he checked every box.

But I, again, I was blinded to the fact that like you do need chemistry and that kind of like unexplainable attraction,

which we never had.

Yeah, because you can make as much money as you can make, but if you're not physically attracted to them, you won't have sex.

So, exactly.

And that's like sex is such a huge part of like human experience.

Amazing sex changes everything.

Um, and when I say amazing sex, it's not just like bam, bam, bam, orgasm.

Like, it's not like that.

It's very like soul-based experience.

And I think that that changes everything.

And with my current partner, with my husband,

the kind of sex we have and the kind of exploration we get get to do is,

it's unlike anything I've had.

And I was a serial monogamous my whole 20s.

Like I've dated so many people to know that like I have falsified all the things already.

So now I know that through falsification, this is my choice.

Like, yeah.

So you were monogamous.

Are you still monogamous?

No, we're monogamish.

What's up?

95% monogamous, 5% non-monogamous.

It's the easiest way to say it.

Like we're emotionally, socially, romantically committed to just each other, so we're like socially monogamous.

Yeah, but sexually, we are allowed to play with other people.

So, that's so that's kind of my setup, and it's always been my dream setup.

I just was never able to find a partner who was like on the same page as me until now.

Wow, so you can let him sleep with other women and he won't care if I'm there, yeah.

If oh, if you're there, yeah, okay, so same way with you, he has to be there for

another guy, yeah, yeah,

and I'm like, I'm super turned on on by him like you know getting pleasure so it's not necessarily people always ask me like how do you deal with jealousy and i honestly think like

I have like a gene and I talked about this with other sex therapists and experts too.

Like, I think I have a gene that's like, I just have low jealousy.

And I think that there are people, there should be like a more scientific study on this, but I think there are a lot of people who have that gene.

Or, yeah.

You were born with it.

It wasn't like a childhood thing that triggered i feel like i just was not like super jealous ever okay yeah wow i wish i could say the same i think i used to be very jealous but as i've matured it's it's gone away

so like right now let's do you have a partner yeah fiancé yeah oh a fiancé congrats um how's how's your sex life been from one to ten i'd say like eight

Eight?

Okay, that's amazing.

I love when people that have a good sex life say eight because they know that there's always like improvements and exploration.

If you say, if you say 10, it's probably fake.

It's cap.

There's no one out of 10.

I'm the same way when I eat at a restaurant.

Like, I'm not just giving out tens, you know.

Really?

There's always room for improvement.

Okay, what's a restaurant that's 10?

I mean, none.

You know,

David Porter out here at a restaurant.

It's like, I don't give out 10s.

Interesting.

So, yeah, when I asked that question all the time in my class, like, I teach at Cal State and I teach sexual communication, 16 weeks of like sexuality, starting from history of sexuality to the future of sex with technology.

So I always ask my students, like, okay, let's rate your sexual wellness now.

Like, how, how good is your sex life from your own opinion from one to 10?

And

people are always like, well,

like, five.

And I realized, like, wow, there's a lot of people that are not having good sex.

And I think that's why I really wanted to start my social media to like spread more sex positivity and reduce more shame and help people have better sex in general because

it permeates into like every aspect of your life.

Absolutely.

So, a lot of people answering low numbers, what are the reasons you're seeing why their sex lives aren't good?

Well, I teach Gen Zs.

So, with Gen Z's, I do think there are a couple of reasons why that I can theorize.

And there's also research on some of them already.

I think the first reason is being

addicted to social media and not necessarily spending a lot of time and effort into like developing sexual connection with other people.

That would be the first one.

The second one is a lot of anxiety.

Like, when you have general anxiety, you will have like tenfold sexual anxiety because you know, like, sex is vulnerable.

Like, you're naked, your f is out, your f is out.

Like, how can you feel even more confident in a sexual setting?

No, you won't.

So, the general anxiety that Gen Z is feeling is affecting

the ability to establish sexual connection.

and then i think the third reason is possibly you know technology like consumption like over consumption of

um and

the inability to just develop like social relationships i could see that yeah i mean people are glued to their phones and anxiety is at an all-time high so people get performance anxiety maybe they can't even get it up a lot of people can't get it up yeah yeah like one in three men will experience

Yeah.

One in three men will experience ED at some point in their lives.

So it's, it's very, very, it's a normal occurrence at this point.

Yeah.

And that's just people that admit it.

So it's probably even higher to be honest.

Exactly.

And I mean, once you pass like a certain age, like let's say 45,

there's, you know, testosterone issue and all of those things to lead to ED, but not only ED, like also low sex drive and.

sexual desire.

You know, you see a lot of older men that perhaps just don't want sex that much.

But what I'm seeing, though, is young people experiencing ED, like people in their early 20s.

It's really the time where your should be hard all the time.

You know, you're in your early 20s.

Like

from the age of 15 to like 25, like I think with young men, like, you know, all you want to do is

be making babies.

But there's a lot of young men that are experiencing ED due to anxiety.

But not to say all Gen Z's are addicted to their phones.

You know, I teach amazing, amazing group of people.

So I'm always interacting with like brilliant Gen Z, and I do love them.

That's so cool.

Um, one of your most viewed videos on Instagram was about friends with benefits, yeah.

And I feel like those rarely work out.

You're like the only person I know that's pulling it off, to be honest.

So, congrats!

But thanks, what's your advice?

Probably because of that low jealousy gene, yeah.

So, your advice would basically be to monitor that jealousy aspect of it because that's why they always end the jealousy part, right?

Yeah, um, if you're highly jealous, don't get into one, Right.

Like a friends with benefits relationship is a very,

it's a very stoic and pleasure-based relationship.

It's not like a relationally connecting relationship.

You know, you're not going to be establishing like deep emotional bond.

It's a friend.

Like it's a friend that you really like, that you enjoy hanging out with and sometimes.

So it's not necessarily a good type of relationship to pursue for anyone that experiences a lot of jealousy and anxiety.

Yeah, you got to be built different for those.

It creates even more anxiety, I would assume.

Oh, for sure.

And low self-esteem.

Yeah.

Because when your friends with benefits leave you for like a different person, then that, you know, your self-esteem could be like crushed.

Absolutely.

Your most viewed video on YouTube is about sexual meditation.

So what exactly is that?

Sexual meditation is like a regular meditation practice, but it focuses on sexual thoughts, feelings, and sensations in your body.

And in my guided sexual meditation on YouTube, I guide people people through different types of journey.

One of them is physical sensation.

So it could be, you know, taking deep breaths and then like massaging your nipples, massaging your pubic area.

Another one is more sexual empowerment.

So it's more like

sexual affirmations.

Like, I am an amazing lover.

I love my talk.

I love, you know, I love my body.

So it's just for,

they're all for sexual wellness, but hitting at different points because something that experiences

something like body sensations versus

feeling good about your own sexuality is different, right?

One is more cerebral.

You think about it as thoughts, and another one is visceral, like body.

Yeah.

It's super cool to see you bringing this mainstream because sex was such like a taboo topic, especially for Asians and like just growing up, barely anyone talked about it.

Yeah, I mean, I get messages on TikTok all the time because that's my biggest platform.

And I get messages all the time, like, thank you so much.

I've never seen an Asian sex-positive person.

And I'm like, Yeah, that's true, though.

Yeah.

Kazumi, probably the only two Asians I know talking about it.

Yeah, well, you know, there are other of us, but like, it's hard to become mainstream either as a sex educator or a star

from our background.

It's a shock sometimes because, like, I'll have, you know,

Chinese fans that are in China that DM us.

Um, and it's like, oh, you know, I've like, I cannot believe there is a Chinese Asian woman talking about these things.

And it helps them.

It helps them feel less ashamed of their desires.

It helps them feel less ashamed of wanting to pursue like, you know,

sexual wellness.

Yeah.

And speaking of Asian men, you made a video about Asian guys and their dick sizes.

Oh.

Oh, where did you think I was going with that?

That's funny.

But is it a myth or is it true from what you've personally seen?

About what?

Asian sizes.

Asian sizes?

Yeah.

Statistically speaking, if you're comparing like

sizes in Asia and like, let's say, the men of like Congo, there is going to be statistical difference of the length of sizes because that's just data that's out there.

Like you can Google this.

It's just National Institute of Health data.

but my personal experience is I have had I have had sex with a lot of Asian men with like very nice

and very you know

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it's big

so personally i think it's it's um

definitely how you use it rather than having the size because i have had sex with people that have huge that just didn't know how to move their hips and like moving your hips means everything so wow so that that saying is true it's about the motion yes it is the motion well you know but like i'm gonna be real here like if you have a micro it's gonna be hard for me to feel anything inside.

That's like the one exception.

But yeah, if you have like four inches.

Four inch.

Yeah.

Know how to get it really hard, you know, like I can heal you get it really hard.

Like, then, hell yeah, we can, we can rock and roll.

But, like, if you have a micro,

there are, there are things that you can do.

Giving help to guys out here watching.

Love it.

Did you have that sex ed class in high school?

I did.

That was a joke, right?

Well, mine's probably worse than you.

Really?

Yeah, mine was just like reproductive system oh like how women have babies you didn't have the banana demonstration with the no did you with the condom yeah where you're like oh that banana is uh

i mean

all the kids were laughing no one took it serious do you always use condoms i do

nice even with your fiancé yeah really yeah wow you're such a good boy i know right

wait you don't though uh no i i mean i have sex with my husband okay yeah if we have sex with other people yes yeah that's why i asked because when we explore other people yes but it with my husband no okay well speaking of condoms stds are at an all-time high what should people do to stay protected 100 stay protected you have to if you are having casual sex there is no reason why you're like not protecting yourself like wearing a condom is super simple it takes you five seconds to pop one in like why not why not use it and protect yourself from forever something that you could have absolutely we got these ps condoms right here.

Yeah.

They're 30% thinner than a condom.

I saw one here.

Okay, so no robbery smell.

I like that because I hate rubbery smell.

That was like the one thing that turned me off in my early 20s.

I used condoms back then, but still I didn't like it.

The smell is pretty strong for some reason.

Yeah, yeah.

Non-toxic ingredients, 100% vegan love.

Exceptionally thin.

Don't we love that?

Because like we gotta feel the cough.

Yeah.

When it's too thick.

If it just feels like rubber.

I'm not

a sex robot.

Yeah.

Have you seen those male sex robots?

No, my dad had a.

Your dad has this male sex robot?

That was a weird way to word it.

No, my dad had a female sex.

It wasn't a robot.

It was like a toy, I guess.

Don't, don't, don't.

Yeah.

Ooh.

I like this packaging.

Yeah, it's pretty sleek.

Let me see.

I'll link in the description.

Oh, wow.

It's like an Apple like iPhone box.

Makes you feel like a baller.

Yeah.

Slip into something more comfortable.

That's so pretty.

Yeah, I also like that it's not too

masculine.

Like

it's cool.

Like women can buy it and feel good having it in their shelves, you know?

Are you big on toys and stuff?

I love toys.

Yeah, I love sex toys.

I love exploring.

I love just trying different things and being, you know, a sex educator.

Every brand sends you like a PR box.

So I have like 200 vibrators.

It's a good life, right?

It's fun.

And my partner loves seeing me like come.

So sometimes he will just watch me use one of these tools and just like watch me come and moan.

And he loves it.

There's a word for that, isn't there?

If you're thinking a cock, that's not.

Okay.

That's watching your partner have sex with someone else.

Okay, but he does.

Edging.

Oh, edging.

Yeah.

My husband edges often.

He's a huge fan of like breath work and meditation.

Same.

Yeah, so he will do breath work and hold his breath for a long time.

And sometimes he feels like he's about to come through breath work, but then he will like edge, like not come.

What?

You can come from breath work?

Oh, yeah.

Lots of men can come from breath work.

I've seen it many, many times.

And my husband is one of them.

What's the technique?

Because I do wim hoffs.

Yeah.

And you hold your breath.

Yeah, but I don't ever get like hard from it.

Oh, maybe you have to focus on your pelvic area.

You you have to like send you know energy there and interesting so you're big on like sexual energy transfers like oh 100 yeah i'm like a you know because i'm western trained for my phd but i'm like i'm an eastern girl so all the things that i grew up with like all the energy stuff superstition like all the things you know from my culture and religion is definitely infused with all the stuff that i learned from the west so i'm like a a Western girl on the outside eastern girl on the inside so i love both i love that because yeah, I truly believe when you have sex with someone, there's some energy transference.

Oh, yeah.

And you can like inherit some of their traumas and some of their energy.

So, yeah, that's why, like, if I'm gonna have sex, if I'm gonna play with other people, like, I need to kind of know who they are.

Okay, so you want you randoms?

Um,

at

some point, after like talking to someone, I wouldn't consider them random, right?

Right.

Like, you know, like talking to you, knowing you, and like researching you.

Like, I know you a little bit, you know, so you wouldn't be a random.

Okay.

Yeah.

Do you go to uh no, I feel that.

I feel that.

Yeah.

I meant like a one-night stand, I guess.

I've had, I've had some of those in my 20s.

I had fun, but I wouldn't say it was like an amazing or gasp experience where I like come multiple times and squirt.

Yeah.

Cause I love squirting.

But yeah, I wouldn't, I would say it was like the best one-night stand I had was like seven out of ten.

Damn.

You know.

Do most women squirt?

I believe every woman can squirt.

Okay.

But whether or not they want to.

Interesting.

Because some people are still like

afraid that it's pee, which I'm like, who cares?

Wasn't that busted, though?

It's like 90% something else or something.

Yeah, fluids from like Skeen's gland.

Yeah.

Yeah.

But still, even if you, you know, when you push it out, even if there's a little bit of pee in it, like you're so into it, you don't care.

Yeah, there's some pre pee in pre-com too, right?

Yeah, and it's hot.

Like, you know, pee, pre-com in my mouth, go for it.

Damn.

Yeah.

My partner, like loves loves receiving I give him BJs weekly wow yeah I give for for Valentine's last year I give him like BJ coupons and he can just like use the coupon damn yeah he's just stacking those dude happy happy husband happy life nice what about golden showers and stuff like that um I'm I'm down if it's like in the bathroom like if we're taking a shower together he wants to like pee on me sure that's kind of hot it's warm it's like you know liquids from him I'm down I'm I'm a freaky girl.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Damn.

My students are always like, oh my God, Dr.

Tara, I can't believe you said that.

I'm like, why not?

Why not say these things?

It's so cool.

I like them.

Yeah, it's cool to see the college not give you any slack and being able to teach this folks.

My dean, the dean of my college follows me on Instagram.

No way.

Yeah.

Where do you teach?

Full in Caleb?

Cal State Fullerton in Orange County.

I didn't know they even had a class like this in college.

Yeah, sexual communication.

I wrote a textbook on it.

Damn.

Yeah.

You're like the pioneer of this space.

Kind of.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It's fun.

It's really nice to be the person that like Gen Zs look up to as like a role model for sex positivity because I think that it's hard to fix older people, but it's easy to influence people that are younger to live the sexually fulfilling life that they deserve.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

That's so cool.

People open up and like I think a lot of girls get shamed in social media today's world at least just like high body counts.

What do you see?

You know, like, there's so much shame, just anything women-related.

Cause, like, even me, my CV is like 30 pages long.

There's still comments on my videos, like, shut your mouth.

Yeah, I'm like, you know, excuse me, like, who are you even?

Get out of here.

Yeah.

Like, there's just shame for anybody and everybody that are female and are talking about sex in a positive way, which sucks because I don't necessarily want to leave these haters behind because they need help the most.

You know, whenever I see people like canceling men, right?

Like, like these fucking men, they don't know whether they're not there.

All they do is attacking women, like cancel them, cancel them.

Like, get the f out of here.

I'm almost like on the opposite side.

I want to show empathy and show you there is a sexually fulfilling life where you don't have to hate women, where women can, where women and you can be in love and have a good relationship.

And I don't want to leave these people behind.

Like my, some of my students are like, do you have incels on your page?

And I'm like, probably.

And

I welcome them.

Like, come on, come to the, come to the bright side, come to the, you know, the sunny side.

Life's great.

Yeah.

I think a lot of the hate's projection from personal experience and they just want to hate from like an anonymous account.

If everyone's coming, then the world is better.

Yeah.

No, it's a serious issue right now.

Reproduction, actually.

Testosterone is at all-time lows.

Yeah.

Even women, I'm seeing a lot of studies with birth control now.

Have you been following that?

Yes, actually.

You know, it's interesting because there's hormone issues, but there's for, but for men, I saw a recent statistic that show one-third of infertility cases is due to no sperm or like sperm health issue.

Wow.

Yeah.

So 30%-ish is due to like either lack of sperm or like sperm that can't swim.

Yeah.

And it's all like you're drinking your water from glass bottles.

So like microplastics and all these really unhealthy habits that we have through like 20 years, like from

you know when you were a child until now.

So now there's a lot of men that are in their 30s trying to get pregnant, didn't realize like, what is wrong with us?

What is wrong with us?

Like, you know, the woman gets tested.

Okay, maybe she does have like low AMH level, but like a lot of times it's men and they didn't realize it.

Yeah.

Yeah, no, for real.

I know so many people that had issues.

I measured my testosterone kind of low, to be honest.

So I had to raise that.

And it's like, wow, the average 25-year-old man has the testosterone level of our grandparents.

Which is tough, man.

Really scary.

It's tough.

So, what are you doing as remedies?

I'm all natural.

So I know there's people that inject it at TRT, but I'm not a fan of anything unnatural.

I try to be as holistic as possible.

That's why I'm kind of against birth control too, to be honest, just because there's a lot of studies now on how it's affecting their mood and all their

health.

So it's

interesting.

If you're tracking your period, you can use that method of birth control.

Like just natural birth control.

Yeah, I think the problem is a lot of girls don't take it at the same time or whatever.

So it just, they cycle it and then it's.

And like, I don't know about you growing up.

Were you exposed to like plan B?

Actually, no, I got no pussy in high school or college, so not really.

But my friends were.

Yeah, my friends had some scares.

So you didn't have to like do like 2 a.m.

Plan B?

Okay.

So I know that they're claiming that, you know, it doesn't, it doesn't affect like female fertility in the future.

But I also like,

I don't know if that's true.

You know, like they have the money to bury any any study against it.

So who knows?

Yeah, because that was a really harsh medicine.

Yeah.

To kill it, like right then and there, one pill, like that's pretty harsh for your body.

Yeah, I know girls that have taken it like five times.

And like many, many times throughout their life until they were ready to have a baby.

And then they're like, oh, what's wrong with my body?

Like,

but maybe it's all that, you know, medication.

Could be.

Yeah.

I saw one of your videos.

Use coconut oil.

Yes.

In the bathroom.

I am a big fan of coconut oils so you use it as a lubricant

yeah I use it for I use it for like my

I use it for the I use it for when I give my husband a

because coconut oil is antibacterial and it also like tastes a little better for me

I use it for rim jobs like eat

damn yeah wow do you eat

no not yet you recommend it

what's good about it it's pleasurable there's a lot of nerve endings around the butthole So it's like, it's a pleasurable body.

Oh, in the guy, right?

Yeah.

Well, both men and women.

Oh, really?

Yeah.

Okay.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I love when my partner goes down on me and then go a little further, like, you know, do a little

around the butthole.

Yeah, I like eating his.

Like, it's, it's, it's a pleasurable sexual act that's very, honestly, like, very bonding because it feels taboo.

And there's nothing wrong with it when you clean it really well.

It's just a skin.

It's just skin.

Yeah, I guess if you're showering before and cleaning it, I can see it.

But I are you going like right after a night out or you know what I mean?

I think there's levels to it.

I mean, I would I would be down.

I'm one of the I'm really into like smell.

And I'm so into his scent, like his natural scent.

And he does for me too, because we don't really shower that often.

What?

Both of us.

I shower like once every five days.

Whoa.

Yeah.

That's the least I've heard for a girl.

Yeah.

I've heard of guys doing that, but.

Well, my husband sometimes doesn't shower for two weeks.

Damn.

You don't smell it?

No, it smells great.

He doesn't have like BO.

It just smells great.

He also doesn't use like shampoo or body wash.

Okay, that I agree with.

Do you use shampoo?

Yeah, but it's mostly natural.

Yeah.

So I try not to use the fake stuff.

But why do you only shower once every five days?

Because I really don't think we need to.

I don't think we need to.

I think that my skin, my skin is amazing

for someone that doesn't shower.

I don't like scrub it.

Like, I don't use all those products that are advertised for women to use.

Right.

You know, all the scrubs.

Like, my face, I don't use facial wash.

Like, I just use water.

Your skin does look good, I will say.

Thank you.

It's all natural because I just don't shower.

Wow.

Yeah.

I try to use very minimal everything.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I rent my clothes, like, so we don't have a lot of clothes.

Wow.

Yeah.

Deodorant?

Nope.

So your armpits don't smell right now?

Um, I don't think so.

I don't know.

Wow, you are lucky.

You must have some good genetics.

I have to shower daily and use deodorant twice a day.

But you use the natural ones, right?

Natural deodorants.

Yeah, yeah.

The other ones do.

That was a huge study, like finding, remember?

Like, yeah, I was five years ago.

Seriously, why'd you wait 20 years of my life to tell me that?

I know.

When I was young, I was using those like degrees.

Yeah, degree, old spice.

We're probably going to get sued or something.

But yeah,

even toothpaste now it's crazy well they now have all natural products obviously yeah yeah do you do you use one of those tablet toothpaste no what is that

have you seen them oh is that the cheap it's a tablet yeah and then you like put it in water i've seen that yeah but even the water like the tap water you got to dodge so many things so many things yeah i i think that's why i love coconut oil because i know if people put it in food in their coffee in their drinks like then i can use it in sex like then it can be in my pussy then it can be in my mouth Like, yeah, that's interesting.

I actually love coconut oil.

I do oil pools, so I can.

What does that mean?

You just swish it in your mouth for 20 minutes, it makes your teeth super white.

Just coconut oil, or like with

like charcoal.

There's one I buy on Amazon, there's something in it, but coconut oil is the main ingredient.

Really?

It's really good for your teeth.

Your teeth are pretty white, though, so I don't know.

Thank you.

It's from all the with coconut oil.

Oh, so yeah, you're already getting that.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

That makes sense.

Well, Dr.

Tara, it's been fun.

Anything you want to promote or close off with?

Um,

Just, you know, make sure that you take care of your sexual health because sexual health is a part of your overall wellness and well-being.

And you go to my website if you ever are curious about sexual exploration, learning more about your sexual profile.

I have a quiz on there that you can take.

If you take this quiz, then it's a good start on where to go and what kind of conversations you can have with your partners when you date about your sexual well-being.

Nice.

Comment below what you get on the quiz, guys.

Until then, see you tomorrow.