Andrew Santino: Pete Davidson Edged Him Out But Peyton Manning Put Him On

Speaker 1 All right, cold mornings,

Speaker 1 holiday plans, endless to-do lists.

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Speaker 2 Quince.com/slash fly.

Speaker 2 You know, when it gets colder, I always fall in the same trap heavy meals too much takeout and suddenly i'm like why do my jeans hate me i know yeah me too i mean i'll open the fridge in december and it's like half a pizza and an orange from 1997 not a lot of healthy options david but here's the thing staying on track doesn't have to be impossible our new friends at forkful meals.com totally flips that script honestly i didn't think i'd stick with it but these meals show up fresh every week chef prepared real food not frozen mystery mush just heat it eat it and boom you're not calling door dash for the fifth time that week yeah it's not just about eating better it's about time i'd rather spend 30 minutes working on a bit for my hilarious act than 30 minutes staring into my oven going

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Your future self will thank you.

Speaker 2 Yes. Thank you for not feeding me the leftover lasagna for the 12th time.

Speaker 2 He's like, I have to go to school. I want my suitcase.
So he's Swedish for a second. He is, though.
He has the weirdest accent, right?

Speaker 2 I'm the number one. There is no more minority than me.
I missed the minority. That's what they call me.
I know two adult gingers.

Speaker 2 Me and who? Holy See, who is this guy, Heavenway? What is this guy fucking Heavenway? Who's this guy? Tell some fucking story. Who's this guy? Edgar Allan Poe?

Speaker 2 No, honestly, he wrote an actual book of fiction. And he's coming here to publicize it.

Speaker 1 Andrew Santino is a buddy of mine. He's got a podcast called Whiskey Ginger.

Speaker 2 Oh, yep. I've been on it, and there was whiskey, and he is a ginger.

Speaker 1 That's right. And he's got the one with Bobby.

Speaker 2 Bobby Lee.

Speaker 2 Bad friends. It's a hit.

Speaker 1 We had Bobby Lee on. We're having Santino on.
He's a very edgy comedian, very funny. I see him a lot.
I saw him last night again. He's got a special out right now called White Noise, comedy special.

Speaker 1 But in general, always funny. He's in a lot of movies.
He was in Ricky Stanicky,

Speaker 1 where he played Kinicky. Kinnicky.

Speaker 2 Don't be persnickety. I mean, that's tricky to say Nicky and Flicky.

Speaker 1 You were in Ricketty's Persnickity.

Speaker 2 I was in Persnickity and in

Speaker 2 Shaddickity. That's where I grew up.

Speaker 2 In state of New York and Shiddickity. Oh,

Speaker 1 in Connectity?

Speaker 2 I don't know. I think we've strangled this.

Speaker 1 I hope he's funnier than this.

Speaker 2 All right.

Speaker 1 Here he is, Andrew Santino. Have a good one.

Speaker 2 Andrew Santino.

Speaker 2 I am excited to ask you, David.

Speaker 2 Not you, Dana, because I know who you are. Oh, who you're on, right? David, I'm at.
Has he been on your show? Or just the... I'm in the Bobby Lee.
He's done me and Bat. He's on Bat Friends.

Speaker 2 Yeah, he hasn't done mine because he's...

Speaker 1 No, I'm doing your golf show.

Speaker 2 Yeah, you are. Eventually, you'll get a golf show.
But he says that kind of stuff, but I don't know if he means it. I'm excited to talk to David today about his Diddy party experience.
David?

Speaker 2 Because now that he's cleared, I feel like you can say whatever you want.

Speaker 2 We don't run away from that, but you guys go ahead. I don't run away from the free cards.

Speaker 2 Dave and Diddy, the D D parties.

Speaker 1 I was passed around like a rag dog.

Speaker 2 I remember those details. What about next team? Did you?

Speaker 1 I just said, what if I just jump in baby oil just to cut, just to speed things up, and then we start.

Speaker 2 Just slide them around

Speaker 2 the room. Okay, I don't want to guys start the show.
Sorry. We started our show.
No, it's already started. Oh, my God.
Yeah, it's already started. Do you guys have a big introduction?

Speaker 2 No, we kind of have some sort of. Yeah.

Speaker 1 No, first seven minutes are plugging your gigs.

Speaker 2 Yeah, we plug gigs. Do you want to plug a gig right now?

Speaker 2 Yeah. What about when does this come out, by the way?

Speaker 1 I can't keep track.

Speaker 2 What? End of the month. So my special's been out.
The reviews are in. It's great.
It's a hit.

Speaker 1 Everyone's freaking out.

Speaker 2 Yeah, everyone's panicking right off the street. And you can find it on Hulu, which is on Disney, which is on Disney Plus, which is in the app, which is the...
It's a nightmare.

Speaker 1 Right. You have to get on.
It's the steel. You have to get on the Delta app.

Speaker 2 Yeah. You have to get on a plane and sit in cloach, and then you'll be able to I'll just sit across the country to see it.

Speaker 2 But

Speaker 2 it's been a smash.

Speaker 2 It's a huge hit.

Speaker 1 I didn't know everyone would talk about it so fast.

Speaker 2 Moving the needle. It's moving the needle.
Yeah, it's moving the needle closer into my veins because

Speaker 2 I hate taping.

Speaker 2 I hate all of it. It's the worst.
I just want to get rid of it and go and go on to the next one.

Speaker 1 Walk me through watching your special over and over to edit it and how sickening it is.

Speaker 2 I don't do that.

Speaker 1 I'm not that guy. Oh, you let someone do it.

Speaker 2 I let this brilliant editor, she was so good, I let her do it. and then I just say, tell me what you do.

Speaker 1 But you still have to watch it again.

Speaker 2 Honestly,

Speaker 2 I didn't sit and watch it through. Okay.
But I just said, she goes, these are chunks that I think I need your opinion on. And then we just like, I go, that I like this one, please change.

Speaker 2 But I never sat and watched it front to back, truly.

Speaker 1 And they were just chunks in your poop.

Speaker 2 She said it. Is that going to be the whole show?

Speaker 2 Are you going to riff some good stuff or is that going to be that whole thing? Well, is this wiener? It's that. Chunks in the poo.
I mean, he's got his rhythms, his hits.

Speaker 2 He's going to come back with with Bobby. They're delighted to bang.

Speaker 1 Dana doesn't know that our audience is seven and nine-year-olds. We just got all the stats.
Oh, it is.

Speaker 2 Miss Rachel. They go from Miss Rachel to this.

Speaker 2 Yes. I've been here since Eisenhower's first administration, and I'm playing to third graders.
Something's wrong with that. Miss Rachel.

Speaker 2 Those are fans. Thank you, Andrew.
Listen. You're drinking Bald Eagle Blood.
Okay, where's that one? Is that James Austin Johnson kind of?

Speaker 2 It's kind of like stealing from what he does mixed with what Gillis does. I just like take the sounds of what they do.
Bald Eagle Blood. Yeah.
Bald Eagle Blood.

Speaker 2 Yeah, he does do the musing Trump kind of thing. Yeah,

Speaker 2 thinking about it. Think of it, think of it.
Think of it. Think of it.

Speaker 2 Shane's Trump is like.

Speaker 2 He gets very low and he knows how to do the low Trump. He does.
He knows how to do that Trump.

Speaker 2 His best one.

Speaker 2 I love that. I did laugh really hard, and that was when the guy ran in the cave.
Abduadad, he died like a booga big.

Speaker 2 He died like a dog in a cave, like a little crying baby, like a dog, and Shane did a good baby.

Speaker 2 sometimes you just quote Trump you do not need jokes it's never that's never happened in history you just say what he said now I find that people say stuff and it sounds like his rhythm I was talking to a friend yesterday and they they were like it's good it's real good it's great it's probably the best and I was like that is his rhythm

Speaker 2 he's like infiltrated the way we think

Speaker 2 you'll start going like it's probably the best maybe the best I don't know probably definitely the best I lean on the most because I think that's the funniest thing how much he can repeat yeah we're gonna going to do a podcast, a podcast, a beautiful podcast.

Speaker 2 We know how to do podcasts, and here we go with the podcast. I like podcasts.
Everybody loves it, and we're going to do it. I mean, he will go forever.

Speaker 2 How do you exaggerate Trump with that kind of stuff?

Speaker 2 He exaggerates himself. But also, he's so good at convincing you that it might be good.
It's probably the best. It might be the best.
It is the best according to most of the people.

Speaker 2 A lot of people are saying. A lot of people are saying that.
If you look at it, if you look at it. You can talk to a lot of people.
No, there's no one talking to him. No, but he does, though.

Speaker 2 Up Up here, he does. He's speaking to.

Speaker 2 I do a bit where he is alone doing that. Gonna have a peach, a peach.
It's a peach right here. Gonna cut the peach, eat the peach.
You know, many people are talking about it. And then Milani comes in.

Speaker 2 What are you talking to, Bilani? What are you saying? What are you? Do you do it, Milani? No. What are you saying? Blow it up.

Speaker 2 The funniest clip was when they had his kid in his office, and he's like, I want to go to school with my suitcase. Have you seen that guy? Baron? Yeah, Baron, when he was a little kid in his office.

Speaker 2 He's like, you got to go to school now. He's like, I have to go to school.
I want my suitcase. So he's Swedish for a second.
He is, though. It's the weirdest accent, right? Am I wrong?

Speaker 2 It's like he doesn't know. Because he's born in America, but he has that as his dad and her as his dad.
So he had to come up with an interesting voice. He has no idea what to sound like.

Speaker 2 My suitcase.

Speaker 2 I need the number two pants, so daddy.

Speaker 2 Can I have a weapon for school? A weapon.

Speaker 2 Let me bring one to school of mass destruction. Okay.

Speaker 2 Could we get him somewhere? Get him somewhere. He's got a lot of people.

Speaker 1 Aaron is 6'11 now.

Speaker 2 He is a big boy. Good lord.

Speaker 2 He's going to run for something.

Speaker 1 12 years old?

Speaker 2 No, no. What do you mean? I think he's got to be 18 by now.
He's like a. But

Speaker 2 why does he have to go to college? He's bigger than you, David. I've seen him.

Speaker 1 Sorry, I'm not on Instagram.

Speaker 2 He's 19.

Speaker 2 He's bigger than Dana and David combined, but his men have no match for my son. That is funny.
That's very much that rhythm. Looking up.

Speaker 2 But he already knows what he's going to say, which is very interesting. He already knows what he's going to say.

Speaker 1 He does a tilted head.

Speaker 2 He just looks away to tell you that, like, I'm organizing this in a way that you could understand. I looked at the chart.
If there's no chart, it's lights out. But there was a chart.

Speaker 1 So, yeah, the chart saved him.

Speaker 2 The chart saved him.

Speaker 2 More charts. We need more charts.
Come on.

Speaker 2 What is this? I'm not getting around here. I don't know why it's there.
I'm just jokes.

Speaker 2 It's a round of people.

Speaker 1 Oh, now I'm Biden.

Speaker 2 I just do it as a hook now. We miss you, Joe.
We miss you, Joe.

Speaker 1 No, I'm being serious.

Speaker 2 Come on, folks. I'm not kidding around here.
I just like that.

Speaker 2 That's the only thing left. I'm not kidding around.

Speaker 2 You did on my show. You did.
No, you did him telling jokes. Biden doing stand-up.
Did I? Yeah. What were the jokes? I forgot.
I don't remember. You did bits.
It was just on SNL where I did that.

Speaker 2 I'm not kidding around. I'm being serious.
And that just got a laugh laugh every time. But it's true, though.
I know. That is like the exact phrase he's saying.
I'm not getting around.

Speaker 1 Do you think he's better now?

Speaker 2 Joe Biden? He's been dead for like a decade.

Speaker 2 They've somehow managed to hologram him into reaction.

Speaker 2 He's dead. That guy's dead.

Speaker 2 That guy's 100% not alive. You know that, right? That's insane.
I don't know. Was he ever alive?

Speaker 2 They've strung him up. Hey, man, you're talking to the guy who's crushed as Hunter Biden on Saturday night.
Oh, yeah. Yeah, you did.
Yeah, really, you did. You did a great job.

Speaker 2 Didn't I I text you and say you did a good job?

Speaker 1 I don't think so, but you don't respond to that.

Speaker 2 Well, we didn't want to do Church Lady Biden. We wanted to do Dad Biden, young man.
But Church Lady Biden would have been pretty good. Well,

Speaker 2 just he's, I'm just Biden and he's Biden. We wanted to do father-son, that where he's the only one who can understand, Joe.
Hey, we're going to say Materials of Fame. Right.

Speaker 1 What he's saying is.

Speaker 2 No, you go like, you nearly want to go to the restaurant tomorrow at eight. Right, no.

Speaker 1 You want to go to the antennas?

Speaker 2 So

Speaker 2 people say they're going to find.

Speaker 1 They don't have lasagna.

Speaker 2 See, that was the bit. That's the only one who can understand it.
That's a great bit. I know.
Well, we're doing it here for the people. Hey, let's start recording now.
Yeah, let's go. I don't want to.

Speaker 2 Let's start the show.

Speaker 2 This guy's looking at porn, by the way. No, he's looking at.
That's not really not cool. It would be weird if

Speaker 2 he wasn't. Could you get him a regular chair?

Speaker 2 He looks like a child sitting at the dinner table. I know.

Speaker 2 That's their inside joke that it's like five to thirty four feet tall so no missing your chair is tiny compared to you know what i know though i know david took that from his dining room and then was like we don't need to buy a new chair and so it's a dining room we don't have a desk

Speaker 2 we don't have the big it's funny to be stingy

Speaker 2 with all this very rude do you know what i mean not stingy we like you open his fridge i know it's just like a few waters or and a and a baking soda box in there oh he's got a lot in his mouth and he eats out every day no you're not supposed to be in the kitchen sorry I bought the red book camera.

Speaker 2 He's got snacks. Little tuna and little chips.

Speaker 1 Trying to get it back on track.

Speaker 2 What book is this?

Speaker 1 I don't know. I can't see it from here.
It's live from York.

Speaker 2 Oh, it's in the middle. Why wasn't your special name, the Great Santino? Great Santino? Yeah.
I named the special White Noise. Why? Pretty layered.
I'm not mad. I just want to.
I bet you couldn't.

Speaker 2 I'm not mad.

Speaker 2 I do a big joke. There is a joke a bit of.

Speaker 1 Because you're white.

Speaker 2 Because I'm white and I'm making a lot of noise.

Speaker 2 Is that the reason?

Speaker 1 Can you be white in today's society?

Speaker 2 What do you think? Can I be? Well, I have red hair, so I can be.

Speaker 2 We're kind of allowed to move now. You guys are still

Speaker 2 one or 2% of the people have ginger hair in America or something like that, or 3%?

Speaker 2 I don't know. I haven't checked our stats in a while, but I do get it every Tuesday, and I should look at it again.

Speaker 1 Green eyes is too much.

Speaker 2 I just need an answer, Andrew. I don't need a story.
All right, dude.

Speaker 2 It's a dying breed. I think we're up to,

Speaker 2 I think they did joke and say that 2035 we might go it extend but i'm saying you're the ultimate minority no i'm the i'm the number one there is no more minority than me i'm mr minority that's what they call me i know two uh adult gingers yeah me and who

Speaker 2 uh francis cronin from ireland from dublin my wife's nephew he's pulling out names who's francis cronin doesn't matter he's a guy with hair just like

Speaker 2 francis cronin francis cronin everyone's mr cronin no he's gonna love this.

Speaker 2 He's in Hollywood. Francis Cronin.

Speaker 1 I heard a mean

Speaker 1 redhead joke.

Speaker 2 Okay, give me a mean redhead of joke.

Speaker 2 Can I have a mean joke about you?

Speaker 2 That I'll make up while I'm listening to you doing.

Speaker 1 This has nothing to do with you.

Speaker 2 All right, what is the mean redhead? I think I know where you're going. Okay.

Speaker 1 The doctor comes in

Speaker 1 to the family and says,

Speaker 1 You just had your baby, and we got good news and bad news.

Speaker 1 The bad news,

Speaker 2 redhead.

Speaker 1 Good news, he died.

Speaker 2 Oh, my God. Well, that doesn't even make sense.
No, no, it actually looks like it's been at Cedars.

Speaker 2 I was just at that. It was a couple weeks ago.

Speaker 2 That disappointed by

Speaker 2 rusty hair. If you had a kid with red hair, you'd go, bummer.
Yeah, but yours is not. No, you look

Speaker 2 orange.

Speaker 1 You're not. You do fine.

Speaker 2 It's orange. No, but it's soft orange.
You're not Bozo the Klein or something. Yes, I am.
I'm going to tell you. Well, the beard has a hoze under the hair.
The beard is more dark ginger.

Speaker 2 Yeah, my beard and my eyebrows. Yeah.

Speaker 2 The accusations that I dye my hair is maybe the funniest thing the internet could do. I don't even know where I look at it.

Speaker 1 Let's look at a clip of your pubes.

Speaker 2 You want to see it?

Speaker 2 No, who's got better pubes? You want to see?

Speaker 1 Bobby had a lot of pubes. This is what a lot of people are.
Yeah, he's bushy.

Speaker 2 He's a bushy boy. But when he came here, he.

Speaker 2 You guys

Speaker 2 here and he put his legs back and

Speaker 2 he got shaving everything at that place he goes to.

Speaker 2 Anybody who goes to a place where naked men walk around. Oh, you voted.
No, no, he goes to the Korean spa.

Speaker 1 Is he Korean or Chinese? Don't look it up.

Speaker 2 Is he Japanese?

Speaker 1 Viet Cong. Which one?

Speaker 2 Oh, oh, oh, oh, he's.

Speaker 1 God damn, it took two years.

Speaker 2 Malaysian. Malaysian.
Malaysian. Sorry.
Is he really? Yeah, he's Malaysian.

Speaker 1 I did not know that.

Speaker 2 I did not know that. A Malaysian, you know, the Malaysians, they like their cocktails, Ed.

Speaker 2 And they like to be naked in a spa and they shave their privates. We'll be right back.
The nose flick is perfect. That's great.
That was a mannerism.

Speaker 2 No, no, but that was something I never caught. Yeah, that's like mouth-nose out of it.
That's SNL, Dana, right? I know. That was.

Speaker 2 That hadn't been done as far as I know. I did not know that.
You know, that was one. I did not know that.
I like that. I did that for years as a kid because of you.
You know how weird.

Speaker 2 That's so strange to me to remember repeating stuff that you did. I do it now.
I love it. I do that in conversation.
I'll go. I did not know that.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 You ever say, is that weird?

Speaker 2 Is that weird? Is that weird? That sounds like Casey Kasim. Yeah.
Do you remember Casey Kashmir? That sounds a little bit like Casey Kashum. Like Casey Kamisham.
Andrew Santino.

Speaker 2 Number one with a bullet. That's it.
Checking him out. He joined us today on the podcast.
No, we all did him. You did him your standard.
Casey Cashum. Casey Casey.
I did a bunch of shit.

Speaker 2 America's top 10.

Speaker 2 Top 10. But they never had a

Speaker 2 Q Rumble. And you do Scooby-Doo.
And you knew who I met was Rick Rick Dees. Remember Rick Dees? Disco Duck.
Can you do Rick Dees? No.

Speaker 2 I wasn't exposed to.

Speaker 2 He's very like that. It's like old car salesman-y.
He goes, Andrew Santino, Arizona State.

Speaker 2 He does it whenever

Speaker 2 he's talking commercials. No, he does when he sees me.
You see it, Ralph. Surprising guests.
It worked out the same gym. Shut up.
I swear to God, he donated the gym

Speaker 2 alleys. And his son, it's curves for boys.
It's a kind of dark story curve. And we'll do it as in Scooby-Doo form.
Wait, give you a dark story? Yeah, something out there, bombing or war or tragedy.

Speaker 2 Okay.

Speaker 2 Because then we'll do it as Shaggy and Scooby-Doo. As something fun? Yeah.
Donald Trump dropped a mega-bomb on Iran.

Speaker 2 It was three in a row that took care of the cave, right, Scoob?

Speaker 2 So it's the innocence of Scooby-Doo with modern things. But it should be crazy.
I think Shaggy would kill Harder.

Speaker 2 Shaggy Shaggy. Shaggy.
Yeah. Shaggy.
That would kill Harder about giving the sad story.

Speaker 1 He's doing Shaggy. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Shaggy was done by Casey Casem.

Speaker 2 That was the real voice. And who is Scooby?

Speaker 1 He was a guy that.

Speaker 2 Did you not know him? He was a convicted convict that worked there that just goes,

Speaker 2 and

Speaker 2 it was up. Rock Roll.
Rock Roll Roll. Yeah.
Rock Roll.

Speaker 1 He goes, Scooby had a bad date last night.

Speaker 2 He goes, Right?

Speaker 2 Scooby, Scoob, I'm telling you that the tariffs that Trump's putting in are crashing the economy. I don't know what's going to happen.

Speaker 2 Look at the data.

Speaker 2 I thought you would just say rot roll. I know, but Scooby shows up.
By the way, that we're doing. Has this show been good so far

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Speaker 2 I want to know what David thought about this morning. I want to to know what kind of panic you had this morning, knowing that someone over here.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Just that someone's coming to my house.

Speaker 2 You freaked out a little bit. Did he get schooled a little bit?

Speaker 1 I'm not as worried with Dana coming over. He's been here.

Speaker 2 But if it was just you and me alone, you'd be scared.

Speaker 1 No, I would have fun with you because I know at least I know you and we talk. And so,

Speaker 1 and you were there for the

Speaker 1 disaster when I did your podcast.

Speaker 1 I have to say, Santino,

Speaker 1 very professional. I went there.
I went a little early because I had a flight.

Speaker 2 Always early.

Speaker 1 Bobby asked me to come early.

Speaker 2 He asked me to move it a day. He did move it.

Speaker 1 And then he said, can you come like at one tomorrow? Didn't know it was around his sleep schedule. I said, sure.
I'll wait till one.

Speaker 2 So you can have my notes. Pick a topic.
Anyway. We're on the park hotel.

Speaker 2 I spent 20 minutes on this, Andrew.

Speaker 2 This says

Speaker 2 stand-up versus acting. Yeah, because you do a lot of acting.
A lot of stand-ups do no acting. I don't really act anymore.
Not Not anymore. That's my question.

Speaker 2 You like being out there by yourself doing stand-up?

Speaker 2 I like stand-up way more than I like acting. I like acting just fine.
The jobs aren't coming.

Speaker 2 Why was that? And then another question. They're few and far between.
It's tough out there. For acting.

Speaker 2 Yeah, just acting is a weird. Hollywood's so weird right now.
I don't know. It's in a horrible recession.
Yeah, but it's also like

Speaker 2 when's the last, when did you see a comedy movie other than the movie that Spade made with Theo that's going to come out? When's the last time somebody made a movie?

Speaker 2 The last one that was kind of big, funny was his with the you know the world oh wrong missy wrong missy that was six years ago

Speaker 2 that was 11 years ago and that was on Netflix yeah when's the last time you saw a comedy in the theater for

Speaker 2 you don't haven't

Speaker 1 a comedy or an R-rated comedy either one is hard to find no but in the theater I mean it is kind of weird

Speaker 2 hangover Naked gun Naked Gun was actually I'm proud that like I was happy to go see it and I was like please go see it like

Speaker 2 you hated it.

Speaker 2 Well, I love Liam Neeson. I'm happy for, but

Speaker 2 they pushed too hard. The timing of Leslie Nielsen, and it was just, it was hard to duplicate.
And also, Liam Neeson, who, again, is a great actor, but

Speaker 2 I'm not sure if I'm on the trophy like this. And we tried to go down to the pier to find the public.
And it was just too much of that rough voice. There's something about Leslie Neil.

Speaker 2 I couldn't get him out of the old Naked Gun. Of course, the Naked Originals was better.
My point is, like, I'm glad someone's making something. Yes.

Speaker 2 For Christ's sake, it's like we can't even get nothing is getting made or shot here, anything.

Speaker 1 Nothing.

Speaker 2 No, or shot here. But I did like, and I think Pam Anderson killed it.
I think she was really good. They were all great.
It's just the writing. No, but he's not the writer.

Speaker 2 Yeah, he's not.

Speaker 1 He's a very interesting choice, though.

Speaker 2 Well, when he put his dress up, when he came in as a little girl, that was like something out of Masters Guys. It was not a good movie.
I was in it.

Speaker 2 I made it.

Speaker 2 And then he put his crotch out like that. And he's 73.

Speaker 2 No, don't do that. And then when they did the OJ joke, it's a bit womp, womp.
I mean, that's a lot of time. I didn't like that time ago.
So that was.

Speaker 1 Leave OJ alone. He's gone through enough.

Speaker 2 Welcome back to Movies Today with Andrew and David. Okay.
Okay, let me see what else is on here.

Speaker 1 No, I have stuff too.

Speaker 2 January 6th. Why is that written on here? I don't know.
It's written on every single one of these.

Speaker 2 That's where it is. Yes,

Speaker 2 that was just me going, don't

Speaker 2 talk about January 6th. What was your alibi? That was a note to myself.

Speaker 2 were you there were you there look I will say you were just part of the crowd I want to keep this because your handwriting needs to be studied yeah and by

Speaker 2 the first wait it's like it's half of the letters are in all caps and then half are in

Speaker 2 just my haiku kind of weird stuff you know he's very worried he's very controlling see how he word processor no but he's but see david is very is very organized yeah yes that's why i have a war going on in here right now what's going on up there a lot of a girl said that's what a girl said to me.

Speaker 2 I was working on this thing, and this girl, I was eating lunch by myself. Yeah.
And she came over to me very politely and was like, I see that you're eating alone. Do you want to join us?

Speaker 2 And I was like, no, I'm good. Thank you so much.
But I wanted to say, you think I'm alone? You have no idea what's going on.

Speaker 2 Like, I am never alone. Fights are happening.

Speaker 2 Like that. Like, okay, so you're six feet tall.
Six, one. Cool beard.
Six feet.

Speaker 2 Handsome. Most comedians are a little funny looking.
Yeah. Some funny looking women and restaurants.
I don't trust you enough to go, do you want to join us?

Speaker 2 Or was that sort of like, can I be your girlfriend? No, she was working with us. She was like part of the thing I was working on.
But she noticed I was eating alone and she was like, eat with us.

Speaker 2 Like, what are you eating alone? But I like eating alone. What if she said, eat my ass? I like doing a lot of stuff alone.
I just ate alone before I came here. It was great.

Speaker 2 Well, sorry, say the joke again, David. We stepped on my ass.

Speaker 1 What if she actually said, eat my ass?

Speaker 2 And that's why we stepped on it.

Speaker 1 You want to eat my ass?

Speaker 2 Hey, Scoob, what if she actually said, eat my ass?

Speaker 2 Did she say that? Because you should have taken her up on it if she. She like asses.
We don't care. Ooh.

Speaker 2 Don't worry about it. Oh, this has

Speaker 2 Happy Gilmore 2. Because you're in it and you're in it.
Well, he's actually in it. I'm not in it.

Speaker 2 You're in it? No, I'm not in it. We did like a four-second cameo.
You did. Me and Bobby sat on it.

Speaker 2 We shot it from our studio. They came to us.
I remember. Yeah, we're in there for three seconds.
You're in it twice. God, I got it.
Yeah, they show our image twice.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I got to get a three-second cameo. You could get one, dude.
I don't know.

Speaker 1 Schneider had a shorter one. I'm fine.

Speaker 2 Schneider was shorter than us?

Speaker 1 His cameo, yeah.

Speaker 2 Really? He was on Schneider Show. Is that a short joke?

Speaker 2 No, it's Schneider. Look how naughty he is.

Speaker 2 Someone texts me. It's like poison or water.

Speaker 1 Someone texted me. They go, I'm at Sandler's on the road with Sandler and Schneider's fucking making fun of you right now.

Speaker 2 I'm like, on stage?

Speaker 2 Making fun of you?

Speaker 1 No, just he makes fun of you.

Speaker 2 Why does he tease you so much? Why does Rob Schneider tease you?

Speaker 1 Because we're old buddies, yeah.

Speaker 2 Yeah, but he's mean about it because I've seen some of the stuff he's written online about you. His blog is insane.

Speaker 1 Are you in the chat rooms?

Speaker 2 Yeah, dude. And this also says Peyton Manning.

Speaker 2 I thought it was interesting that he produces white noise. Yeah, he produced my special.
They're producing. Omaha Productions is producing a lot of.

Speaker 2 Peyton loves comedy.

Speaker 2 Okay. You've seen he does.
He did great on SNL.

Speaker 2 I thought he...

Speaker 2 I met him at one of the 40th, and I said I thought he was the funniest. He was probably the funniest athlete they've had on that show.
I think so.

Speaker 2 Next to Joe Montana. And me, actually.
He was on that roast with Rob Lowe. And he

Speaker 2 wanted, I think he wanted to get more into comedy, so his production studio was like, what if we start producing comedy? And they reached out, and I was like,

Speaker 2 yeah. And I think two of the executives were big fans, so it just kind of was a natural.
Of you?

Speaker 2 No, of you. And they were like, you're going to meet David Spade? They'd seen your stand-up special and then wanted to do it.
They've seen me do stand-up.

Speaker 2 I just want to get clarity. There's no editorial.

Speaker 1 You haven't seen you stay.

Speaker 2 They actually saw you do stand-up and then pursued you to do stand-up. Tuscany Wine Festival, February 4th through the 19th.
Please come come see me.

Speaker 2 I'll be sick of it. Cheeseburger is off Netflix.
Cheeseburger, Netflix took it out. We're about to put it back up.
In fact, when this is out, it was my Netflix special.

Speaker 2 I'm going to put it. I tried to watch it.
No, no, I don't know yours either. Don't be offended.

Speaker 2 I did actually start to watch your Amazon special. That's nice.
Dandelion. What happened? Is that what it was called? Yeah.
Yeah. Oh, fuck.
Whoops. No wonder why I turned it off.

Speaker 2 Sorry, I can't get them all. She actually called it special dandelion.

Speaker 1 Blow me.

Speaker 2 That's what it should have been called.

Speaker 2 No, that's what the dandelion says. You don't get to talk to me that way.
You don't say those words.

Speaker 1 No, I'm saying a dandelion one.

Speaker 2 It looked aggressive, but that was his pun. I know that's not a problem.
No, listen. It's number one with part of a bullet.
Did you?

Speaker 1 No, tell us more about. We're on a commercial with your plugs.

Speaker 2 No, no, no. We don't need to.
No. I like this.
It sounds funny. Well, I want to talk about the special because

Speaker 2 it was funny. It's your second one.
I shot it in Minneapolis. It's my third one, but it's, yeah, Netflix and then this one.
No, I did one for Showtime years ago,

Speaker 2 which I hated.

Speaker 2 I've done Showtime, Netflix, and Hulu. I'm trying to touch all the bases.
HBO. I'm just saying, you're next.

Speaker 2 Here's the thing that happens. Usually you've had sets coming up to the special that it happens.
Sometimes in the room, it just happens.

Speaker 2 So you're getting so much back that you're just getting funnier and tighter, and you're chasing things, you're extending things. And then you go to the taping and all the lights.

Speaker 2 And it's really hard to capture that. And that's what's frustrating unless you do 10 tapings.
No, then you get lucky. I think there's only been about

Speaker 2 four or five specials that comics have done that transcend time.

Speaker 2 Almost every special is it's you can't. It's tilted and tight eyes.
I just think you can't. Specials are good.
Like David's special was funny. I hate to say that into the mic.
I can't not be funny.

Speaker 2 But it doesn't matter. But you're funnier than your special.
Every comic is funnier than their special. Every comic live is better than their special.
I don't care who it is.

Speaker 2 The only people in recent years who have a special special that will live on, that I mean, Louis,

Speaker 2 Chappelle, Rock's earlier stuff.

Speaker 2 But, like, no one that was putting out anything that's not going to be. Louie early on was doing five nights.

Speaker 2 And I've talked to people with the crew, and they go, after four nights, it wasn't happening. And then the fifth one, he landed.
Yeah, but Louis is Louis, Louis is a, you know, he's a Mount Rushmore.

Speaker 2 I think he's one of the greatest that ever touched on. He's red-headed.
He might. He's a red-headed man.
He may be the best stand-up ever. It's possible.
He's probably. He's in the conversation.

Speaker 2 only because anybody who can take a 27-year-old movie, Goodwill Hunting, and write a new joke about it. It's great,

Speaker 2 brilliantly written, so clean and clear, and just such this

Speaker 2 about them apples. You know, it's like we know how hard that is to make that hilarious.
And he did.

Speaker 2 I think he's the best. But there's only a few that transcend time like that.
But live. We're going to play this

Speaker 2 clip for Louie. He's coming on our podcast.
He'll be sitting where you can. He would never come.
And we're going to play. He would never come.
He unfortunately is coming. Is he coming? Yeah.

Speaker 2 He's coming. He's going to sit us with you guys.
I'm going to text him. He's got a book.
He's a good idea.

Speaker 2 He's writing fictional novels.

Speaker 2 He's trying to turn in, what do you call fucking Hemingway for him? Lizzie, who's this guy, Hemingway? What is this guy, fucking Hemingway? Who's this guy? Tell some fucking story. Who's this guy?

Speaker 2 Edgar Allen Pohl? No, honestly. He wrote an actual book of fiction, and he's coming here to publicize it.

Speaker 1 Daniel, we need a camera there.

Speaker 2 On you guys? Yes. No, no.
Right.

Speaker 2 I'm just

Speaker 2 really good to get a 70-year-old in profile. So that's making it for me.
You're not 70? Yes, I am. Are you really? Get out of here.
You know. You're so good.

Speaker 2 You look so good, man. It's unbelievable.
Thank you. You on the other side.
You also look good. See that? So comedy is misdirect.
You thought I was going to say you on the other. What I did was.

Speaker 1 People think I'm dating.

Speaker 2 That was smart.

Speaker 2 I thought you were going to go, and then you went complimenting me. I can do this all day with the Misdirect.
So watch this. Okay.
I'm really enjoying being here. Thank you.

Speaker 2 Am I?

Speaker 2 Am I what? Well, the foot, you're the same. The foot is a dead giveaway.
I'm just giving everybody. This is a giveaway.
This means I got to go outside and pee. You've got two guys between.

Speaker 2 He makes me pee outside when I come over here. I can't use the bathroom.

Speaker 1 Just not now.

Speaker 2 Okay.

Speaker 2 They're all broken? Yeah. My IQ

Speaker 2 with his IQ equals 170. I won't tell you the ratio of where the IQ comes from.

Speaker 1 I could guess. Where the split is.

Speaker 2 You're 100. He's 70.
That's not hard. You are sub.

Speaker 2 Neither of you are over 100.

Speaker 2 I'm 120 and he's 50, but it doesn't matter i auditioned for men david and i both went to arizona state so i was about to bring that up that's not a school that's a that's a keger

Speaker 2 class attached it's a keger with a where did you go to college

Speaker 2 i went to san francisco state fucking university not a real place

Speaker 2 not a real school no it's a joke there's no effing in school it was a joke arizona state was a great school great

Speaker 2 and you graduated party school come on i did uh-uh do you know how to find the base of an isosceles triangle yeah do you? Yeah, I do, actually. Do you know what a dangling participle is? No.

Speaker 2 I'll show it if I put my pants. Put my pants in, and I'll show you what it looks like.

Speaker 2 Dangling participle.

Speaker 1 Do you believe that under the pyramids in Giza, there's

Speaker 1 things that go straight down?

Speaker 2 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 2 Oh, yeah, the tunnels?

Speaker 1 Tunnels, and also it goes down another mile.

Speaker 2 100%.

Speaker 2 How can you not believe that? I agree too. You don't think under the pyramids that it's an interconnected system of

Speaker 2 tunnels and light refractors. It's all calculations.
I don't believe that. Perfect calculations.

Speaker 1 It's all perfect calculations. For like antennas.

Speaker 2 It's antennas.

Speaker 2 The only thing about that is, can't we get in there?

Speaker 2 Here's my question. We don't want to ruin it.
Here's my question for you guys. We don't want to ruin the ruins? Do you believe it? You ever redone your bathroom?

Speaker 2 You know how they just screw up everything while they're doing it?

Speaker 2 We don't. We don't want that.

Speaker 2 We could get

Speaker 2 a guy down there with a boring drill and take video. But do you believe we landed on the moon in 1969? No, not in 69.
Okay, not.

Speaker 2 Here's what what i do believe we subsequently landed on the moon of course yeah we have yeah so the first one was fake then they we went back to like prove that our lie wasn't that correct i think we went we circled they had filmed it in case you could see

Speaker 1 ships or aliens or anything on the dark sky

Speaker 2 and so they said we see them run the clip from now on and we don't land and we don't ever land you think we never landed so we did get there didn't land randomly even the subsequent flights i mean the amount of proof that we have that that footage is not real is kind of chaotic at this point.

Speaker 2 Well, I mean, the amount of proof that we have now to go. Here's a possible theory.
That was fake footage. Here's a possible theory.
200 people had to know the conspiracy.

Speaker 2 I was on a three-hour flight with Buzz Aldrin, so he was an award-winning actor talking about going to the moon like a brilliant liar.

Speaker 2 So I say if they didn't land on the moon, faking it was a greater achievement than actually landing on the moon. Yeah, I agree.
That's it. Yeah, he was a great adventure.
Should we take a pause?

Speaker 2 Throw it an ad. No, no, don't throw it in.
Take up the ads. Don't put in an ad.

Speaker 2 Do you have ED? Then you need.

Speaker 2 Oh, no. Do you do a lot of boner pills?

Speaker 2 We do so many boner pill ads. That's all we do now.
Yeah, we're not doing it.

Speaker 1 Is it because you guys are too rough around the edges? Yeah, too rough.

Speaker 2 No, we do boner pill ads because men need it. You know, a high percentage of men have erectile dysfunction, David, and there's nothing wrong with that.
That's why there's hymns. Use code BadFriends10.

Speaker 2 I have 10.10. That's all boner pill ads the whole time.
Don't you say bad any other advertisements? It's all boner pills. You get any regular advertisements? It's just boner pills.

Speaker 2 Oh, we do boner pills and boner supplements. You know?

Speaker 2 It's all boner stuff, dude. It's blue chew.
Have you seen our show? It's all kids. What do you guys read ads for on this show? Oh, sophisticated company.

Speaker 2 Toyota and giant

Speaker 2 multinational. Oh, you get big ads.
Yeah, we get Bet MGM. Oh, you guys are corporate sellouts.
You're shills. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Does that hurt? Did that hurt to hear it from the man? No, it's happening. But look what we've been doing so far.
Look what we're getting away with. You guys are too obvious.

Speaker 1 I have a studio built for three shows a year.

Speaker 2 We can't afford a camera. We have to be in profile.
I know.

Speaker 2 Because next week, though, maybe we'll have one there and we can just look at our guests and get stories.

Speaker 2 This was like a geek squad deal, whatever these cameras were doing. They're doing the best they can with limited budgeting.
Put it that way.

Speaker 2 I bought the lights. You did? Yeah.
And what about who paid for that? I bought that.

Speaker 2 David bought that.

Speaker 2 I bought your chair and I bought your mic. Right? You did? You bought that chair.
And I bought your mic.

Speaker 2 It's your rag tag for you. I couldn't even get an SB7 like one of those.
You had to give me like an old handheld. No, I have one of those shitpock ones.

Speaker 2 And how come you guys get the nice ones in the middle? I've only got it one. It's not bad.
No, it's not bad. That's not high quality for what we're doing.
It's not going to have a basy, sexy thing.

Speaker 2 You're not going to get laid off that. Right.
This one you can't. Let's ask him about the firings at SNL.

Speaker 1 What do you know about them?

Speaker 2 What do you think about?

Speaker 2 Because, well, you know, this is kind of our theme, but it's very loose.

Speaker 2 You probably did try it for SNL because you can do do

Speaker 2 but I tested for SNL. Yes.

Speaker 2 And then I went back to New York and had lunch with Lorne.

Speaker 2 And

Speaker 2 you didn't say it on this podcast. No, you're right.
I'm sorry. It was on your tested for Saturday Night Live

Speaker 2 maybe 11 years ago. I don't remember what it was.

Speaker 2 Something like that. Because you do impressions and characters.
I did a bunch of characters. Yeah.
I would do characters and voices. And

Speaker 2 it was the final three were me.

Speaker 2 This is funny. Me, Dan Soder, one of my closest buddies in stand-up.
You had him on there, funny. And

Speaker 2 Pete Davidson. And I think you know how that went.

Speaker 1 Was that that long ago Pete got on?

Speaker 2 Yeah, it was almost 10 years ago. Yeah, Dan Soder said that.
It was Pete.

Speaker 2 Me, Pete, and Sodi. And I tested, and then they called

Speaker 2 and Schookas called me and said, Lauren wants you to come back and say, you got to go say hi to Lauren. And, you know, that's a good thing.
He wants to go back to that. Fly back? So I flew back.

Speaker 2 Just to say hello?

Speaker 2 This was crazy. I flew to New York, and I was like, is this it? Am I like going to move to New York? Like, this is wild.

Speaker 2 And then I got in the office and then we talked for like an hour about

Speaker 1 Chicago.

Speaker 2 No, he loved talking about Chicago because he knew I was from Chicago.

Speaker 1 Yeah, about other than SNLU. And he ate poppies.

Speaker 2 That means he likes you. And then he said, salt, but he was like, oh, you want to meet everybody? And so I walked around and met all the writers and everybody.

Speaker 1 Like meeting the family of a girl that I remember this, but then the

Speaker 2 can't use you now. I think you're going to be, I think you're going to have a great career.
I don't think you're the puzzle piece I'm looking for, was I think the phrasing. And I actually loved it.

Speaker 2 And then people were like, mad for me, but I wasn't upset. I was like, I think.

Speaker 2 Well, and then when I realized it was Pete, I talked to Soder and I was like, yeah, he's a decade younger than us.

Speaker 2 We had all been on TV before or whatever.

Speaker 2 He was

Speaker 2 like 9-17 or whatever. He was like Eddie Murphy.
He was a kid. So I was like, yeah, they're going to pick this malleable, cute kid whose dad died in 9-11 versus a vulnerable, red-headed.

Speaker 2 What did your dad die in yeah my dads are still alive i got two of them i got a real dad and a stepdad how about that that's your problem how about them okay everything everything's making sense right now i know like i'm connecting that's hurting you in the business just i'm connecting i know i thought about getting rid of one of them but what do you think of saturnight live in the last you know people say oh they're too woke or whatever what do you think of snow uh

Speaker 2 i like you know it's so funny i don't even know how to phrase this but i mean the beavers and butthead sketches i think i think snl is always i've always i've always been a fan of snow i'm not part of the bullshit narrative.

Speaker 2 It's such a bullshit narrative of like, they're too this, too that, too that, too.

Speaker 2 Dude,

Speaker 2 they only say that because

Speaker 2 SNL is built, you know when SNL is at its best? When it's built for its audience, and its audience is usually younger than you.

Speaker 2 So when you're like, I don't like these sketches, it's like, because it's not for you. What is true?

Speaker 2 If you're in junior high or high school and you're just coming on, then SNL, that's your sketch. That's your best.
That's your hero's best. That's who you, yeah.

Speaker 2 Like for, I was, I just said it started, like my entire youth build around watching SNL like incessantly was watching you guys, which I hate to say.

Speaker 2 And when I say you guys, you know, it's just you, Dana. It's not David.
Wayne's World came out one in 91, I think. How old were you? About.
You were like 10 or something, right? I was born in 83.

Speaker 2 So you were like nine. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Eight. But the zeitgeist of that was Wayne's World was one of the like, that's, you know, I could quote every line from that movie.
I couldn't quote one line from Joe Dirt.

Speaker 2 Go to commercial. Go to

Speaker 2 the podcast. David, it's a joke.
I can't believe it, Dave.

Speaker 2 We won't have any commercials when you're in the movie. David needs to make a whole lot of commercial.

Speaker 1 I'll give you a line to test you. Go ahead.
What is this movie? Is this from?

Speaker 2 Oh, this is good. Here we go.
Swing.

Speaker 2 Come on, dude. It's not even funny.
What does this bar say?

Speaker 2 Party on, Wayne, or did he say, have a nice party, wayne which one does he say party on wayne he said where's the party wayne

Speaker 2 you know what my mom says to me on the phone all the time by the way this is great my mom no pinky down my mom says my mom says um

Speaker 2 all the time like if to end a call she'll go she's okay she says that all the time do you know what that's from joder how do you not know see he doesn't know I met a woman and her sister, they're in their 40s, and they go, when we talk, when we, I call her, we never say hello.

Speaker 2 We We say, chombrugali.

Speaker 2 So I think you must have that. People go, who's Anthony? Who's Anthony? Who's Anthony? I say that all the time.
Do you know what that is too? You don't know these.

Speaker 1 That's from Apocalypse Now.

Speaker 2 Uh-huh. Who's Anthony? Who's Anthony? My drummer.

Speaker 1 You're not even mixing it up.

Speaker 2 Trump's Robert Duvall memes. I'm going to say all his movies.
That's the bit, David. That's the bit.
I'll do your movies. You ready? You want me to do Timby Rolling Roberts?

Speaker 1 You don't know any.

Speaker 2 Timbi Roberts. Really? I don't know any? Yeah.
He's a story. Really? Look at how vulnerable he's being right now.
No, I like it. It's so cute when you get nervous.

Speaker 1 No, I'm trying to find the lens.

Speaker 2 David, this is wild with me on the podcast.

Speaker 1 I'll keep burning my neck trying to find the camera.

Speaker 2 No, we're going to move that. You know what I think? We have an extra camera.
You know what I think your best line is in any of your movies? Oh, that's a good question. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Your best line, or your best, maybe delivery of a line. Okay.

Speaker 2 I like it.

Speaker 2 No, I'm trying to think of my favorite because I do. Can you think of any?

Speaker 1 Top one? You can't think of one. You fucking.

Speaker 1 Yes, I can.

Speaker 2 You have just too many common scenes. You know.

Speaker 2 Like, you have scenes

Speaker 2 that are,

Speaker 2 you know, like you and the, who's your favorite little rascal? That whole fucking thing with you and Farley, like, that whole back and forth. How about this one?

Speaker 1 They're called doctors.

Speaker 2 They're called that. A lot of people go to school.
A lot of people go to school. What's the contact

Speaker 2 for that? I don't know. That was when Farley goes.

Speaker 1 You went to his... He goes, I graduate in just under seven years, right?

Speaker 1 Just a shade under seven years. He was a lot of people people who were

Speaker 2 seven years. Yeah, that's it.
They're called doctors. They're called doctors.
Improv?

Speaker 1 That was by the plane.

Speaker 2 I don't know. That's got to be you.
Do you find your

Speaker 2 throwaways last longer?

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 For sure. Or jokes that.
A written joke in any way. Well, a joke that you really like or a bit you really like.
It never gets quite the response you want.

Speaker 2 But then people meet you 10 years later and go, oh, love that bit. Yeah, a stupid line, a throwaway line that you didn't like.
It's esoteric. Or something you didn't even like that much.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 The biggest biggest quote, I get yelled, I'm Bobby Mom, and that's a thing we did on the show.

Speaker 2 People yell that at me in the airport, in the airport. People will be like, I'm Bobby Mom, but it was like a throwaway joke.

Speaker 2 People are obsessed. I can't even find the humor in it because I'm like, so fucking funny.

Speaker 1 And is it Bobby Mother or Bobby Mom?

Speaker 2 I'm Bobby Mada, I'm Bobby Mom. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Because

Speaker 2 I was making fun. I've just seen it.
He was making fun of my mom, and

Speaker 1 his mom. He was going soft at you, and then you really fucked up.

Speaker 2 That's how we operate.

Speaker 2 And his his mom has a lazy eye, and we don't talk about it.

Speaker 2 And then I did an impression of a woman with a lazy eye.

Speaker 2 I did this with a lazy eye. I'm Bobby Mom.
And it just kind of the internet loved it, but it was just him and I being mean to each other because that's like our entire relationship.

Speaker 2 Are you going to say that in Rajita dot in Chop Square? In Chop Square, Job Square. Please.
The Scottish so clean and tight. I'm Bobby Mom, boom.
It's just like, it's a good thing.

Speaker 2 I think people took to it because it's... There's no setup.
Yeah, well, no one's doing doing that sort of stuff.

Speaker 2 It's the context of you talking to Bobby and saying that. They like that we feel.
There's a lot of energy around that.

Speaker 1 You get away with stuff about him being Asian, and most people can't touch that. So you get a lot of great jokes that are somehow baked in.

Speaker 2 Because they know your friends.

Speaker 2 Yeah,

Speaker 2 I've always said this in comedy, and you guys know this. This is, I'm speaking, boring talk, but.
No, the audience will love it. No, no, it's boring.

Speaker 2 No, but the thing about comedy that everyone, the truth about comedy is you can say, I don't like this, like, what can you say? You can say anything as long as there's no vitriol below it.

Speaker 2 Like, if there's no like hatred or putrid, people can feel when something, but they know when I make fun of him or I say something that's like racial,

Speaker 2 it's because it's my best friend. But they can feel that it's the thing.

Speaker 2 They just know, America's smart enough to know the difference between when they're like, well, I didn't put this well enough to Bobby, but

Speaker 2 his reaction, his still face, which is a big part of it. It's a big dead pan.
Big part of comedy with Stan Laurel, Jack Benny, you go forward.

Speaker 2 Johnny Carson had his one to the camera, and Bobby Lee is in that Hall of Fame of the Black. I'm Janny, he's Ed McMahon.
Is that what you're saying?

Speaker 2 Basically, but the way he'll react to you with such, you know, there's intelligence behind it. It's just, he goes very still.
Yeah. And

Speaker 2 there's this comic tension.

Speaker 2 And so every time I see you guys clipping that, I don't... I enjoy it every time because of the boom, boom, boom.
And then he's just totally still. Yeah, he's a genius.
He's a deliberate genius.

Speaker 2 I think people think it's like this big dumb clown. It's all even.
And then sometimes off camera, we'll do bits. I know he knows better.

Speaker 2 A clip just went out the other day about we had this guy who's trying to be on the show who's from a Dominican Republic. And I was, he's got this high voice.
He's like, I'm from the Dominican.

Speaker 2 And we're already in on this guy. Like, I love this guy.
And I said, where are you from, buddy? And he said, the Dominican Republic. And then Bobby goes, Have you ever been?

Speaker 2 Have you ever been anywhere tropical?

Speaker 2 It's like, he's born on a fucking island, dude. And it just like, it was us dying at each other.
Then afterwards, I was like, that was really good. And he knew,

Speaker 2 but he knows how to play meme making fun of him.

Speaker 2 We give each other layups, and then the audience can't feel it half the time, which is great.

Speaker 2 But it's funny how good he is sometimes at sneaking in. The master of it in our generation was Don Rickles.
Yeah, well, he was.

Speaker 2 He could go so cutting, but it never, and he went with every racial group. Yeah, right.
He shot at everybody. Everybody.

Speaker 2 But it was also because Don did it with, and I've said this before, comedy matters how it looks coming out of your face. So if Don didn't look like he looked, it would have been, like if

Speaker 2 John Ham says a bitey racial joke, I bet you people go, hmm. That's true.
Yeah. Don was

Speaker 2 Don is like a shorter, fat, bald, like a wide-faced eyed, like, eo, and this guy. And look at the Japanese guy.

Speaker 2 He had that kind of turtle. He had a little bit of it.
He had a turtly body. Yeah.
But if you're like a handsome, strapping,

Speaker 2 no one wants to see. Yeah, imagine Brad Pitt doing crowd work and just shitting on some guy who can't get a date.
Yeah. Brad Pitt.
We don't want to see that.

Speaker 2 But Don Michaels is the funniest comedian of all time on some level when he wasn't doing that because he would just do rhythm jokes that made no sense. The show started.

Speaker 2 Put him in the corner. Give him a cookie.
Right. You know, put him in the corner, give him a cookie.
What the fuck is that?

Speaker 2 But it's a great, it's that the rhythm and the rhythm and the rhythm.

Speaker 2 Yeah. The show started 20 minutes ago.
Pack him in ice, you know. So I don't know.
I'm such a fan. Pack him in ice.

Speaker 1 But anyway,

Speaker 2 I loved him. I didn't like that people in the new generation think of him as an insult comedian.
That bothers me. That people are like, he's the original insult.
You're like, that's not what he was.

Speaker 2 Insult comedy.

Speaker 2 But they do that because of what happens now. Because of crowd work.
People are like.

Speaker 1 I will say Rose have gotten pretty fucking rough.

Speaker 1 If you look at the old Dean Martin Rose, they're all good friends, like John Wayne, Clark Gable, you know, Gary Grant, Jimmy Stewart, and they're all like, this guy, you know, and it was kind of like ribbing, but now it's like hired assassins that don't know the person.

Speaker 1 Yeah, they're just being mean. They come in and fucking take your legs out to get their own career going.

Speaker 2 But it's also because the internet is... Everyone is...
There is no whimsy of Hollywood stardom anymore. There's no like, these famous people know each other.
Now it's, everyone is.

Speaker 1 Everyone's scattered.

Speaker 2 Yeah, it's scattered. It doesn't mean anything anymore.
I do. Hollywood's dead, baby.

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Speaker 2 Do you do any old-timey impressions?

Speaker 2 Old timey.

Speaker 2 I do. New timey? Old timeies.
I do people more. I can really just do peep friends.

Speaker 2 That was something they asked in the SNL thing, too. They were like, you can't do famous people.

Speaker 2 I was like, I can do more people that I know or peep character based based on people than I can do famous people. You have an ear.
Like, my dad's,

Speaker 2 I did a character of this

Speaker 2 Southern Insecure High School football coach with it, which they loved. They told me to bring it back the second time I taped.
That sounds funny. And

Speaker 2 because he's so his voice, and this is one of my dad's real friends, but he'd be like, Andrew, Andrew, I bet you can't do 100 push-ups. I give you $100, boy.
And that was like this booming voice.

Speaker 2 And so

Speaker 2 I can push that into something, but I can't. What state is that? That's a good voice.
North Carolina. North Carolina.
Yeah, North Carolina. Here you go, Andrew.
Come on, boy.

Speaker 2 You're going to run like that. I'm going to tell your daddy you run like that.
And he had this like guttural.

Speaker 2 He wasn't like a daunting figure. So I was like, it's funny if he was really insecure about sports.
But he has this booming man voice.

Speaker 2 So that, like, I can do those things with people. Yeah.
Can I say

Speaker 2 my best

Speaker 2 test

Speaker 2 that I love? I'm going to save it for this

Speaker 2 podcast. No, but it's funny.
My favorite thing I did when I tested for SNL, and I was afraid they were going to hit it. Did you have anything else? Well, I was afraid they were going to hate it,

Speaker 2 but it was

Speaker 2 the world's most claustrophobic elevator attendant. Anything the world's most

Speaker 2 is a nice funny thing. The world's most claustrophobic elevator attendant.
And I thought, oh, it's going to tank, but it was fun to do.

Speaker 2 Well, it's really physical. It's like a stand-up act out.
But it's me and just in the elevator going, hi, how are you? Yeah. Oh, good.
And 24? Oh,

Speaker 2 24. Just breaking down.
And then getting prepared for it, yeah. And when I would hit 24, I'd go, it's a good day.
Weather is good. 12.
Here we are, almost up there.

Speaker 2 And I would get more like breathy and nervous. And I would start screaming as it went up.
But when it hit 24, I'd go, ah, 24. Here's your floor.
Thank you. And it was so dumb.

Speaker 2 But they liked it.

Speaker 2 It's original. Yeah, I like that stuff.
I like little kind of nuggety, weird.

Speaker 2 More than me doing impressions. I really wasn't good at impressions.

Speaker 1 How many people are there? Huh? How many people are in the room when you audition? Is it at 8H?

Speaker 2 Yeah, it was was at 8H on the floor. And the desk was, I think,

Speaker 2 Colin.

Speaker 2 Oh, wow. Well, because he was just about to get the...
Dad writing?

Speaker 2 Well, he was like... He was writing.
Yeah, he was writing, but he was.

Speaker 1 About to do update.

Speaker 2 About to update. Exactly.
I think he was... I don't know.
They wanted his opinion about stand-ups because I think he knew a lot of stand-ups. Okay.

Speaker 2 Who else was there? I don't know. Whatever.
There was like four or five people at the table. But it was at 8H in the dark, and I forgot to slate.
That was like a...

Speaker 2 Why did you forget to say your name? I have a trivia for you. What?

Speaker 1 I was at Louie's audition.

Speaker 2 Were you really? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Your precious Louie.

Speaker 2 Did he bomb? Because he did stand-up, right? What year was that?

Speaker 1 That was

Speaker 2 mid-90s? I asked Bomb only because he's not right for SNL. Let's wait and talk to Louisiana.
I gave Louis his first real job.

Speaker 2 Oh, yeah, this is true. What, once you're a head writer on the Dana Carvey show.
Ill-faded Dana Carvey Show. It's a great show.
Great writer.

Speaker 2 Really?

Speaker 1 It got canceled.

Speaker 2 He was the head writer. Everything good gets bitter about it.

Speaker 2 It was meant for HPO. I got talked out of it.
But it was meant for,

Speaker 2 because we didn't have Netflix, it couldn't be, you know, following a home improvement. And now the Dana Carvey Root Beer Show or Mug Root Beer Show.
And it's like, oh, that's right, Mug Root.

Speaker 2 But mostly we just started with Clinton Teeth, and that took us down. But the show was not really blue.
It was esoteric, abstract, Monty Python-y, whatever.

Speaker 1 Just wasn't a

Speaker 2 show. But have you had any big disappointments so far?

Speaker 2 Like, fuck, and take a knee, like, besides being on this podcast what if everything was wrong and you're on here again i think you're doing really well it's a strong it's funny that you say it's funny that you say disappointment i haven't had a lot i mean i haven't been on the i i did that show dave was kind of a hit but outside of that i haven't done anything big

Speaker 2 what do you think about shane and and brigatzi and this this evolution of a lot of comedians doing kind of like arenas and maybe stadiums and then how do we get andrew Santino, this young man with a too cute face?

Speaker 2 What's the biggest rooms that you play currently? Or

Speaker 2 the city that you do well in? Well, I mean, I do pretty well on the road. I mean, I play when I do theaters, when I do a theater tour after I've like warmed up, it's like $1,500 to $2,500.

Speaker 2 If Chicago theater is like $4,000, that's home for me. So I can do those.
All right. The Metro Philly is $4,000.
You can go to $10,000 or $1,200. The next jump to field houses?

Speaker 2 10, that's Burt Kreisner. Yeah, just a level of awareness of fanship.
I don't know. I don't really pine for.
I'm being genuine.

Speaker 1 Those are tougher.

Speaker 2 I don't really care for that. I don't know.

Speaker 2 It's more lucrative. It's great money.
Small rooms are more tough. Yeah, but I mean, like, even a theater of 1,500 to 2,500, that realm that I'm in, that's great.
I don't really care.

Speaker 2 Once you start getting into the five, six, seven thousand seats. It's a different sport.
Well, it just feels different, too.

Speaker 2 Like, Bobby and I just did London and Dublin, and it was 10,000 in London and like six in Dublin. And 10,000 is just kind of like I've did, I just did San Jose with Shane.

Speaker 2 I popped in on his arena show, and I've done arenas. I did arenas with Rogan for years, and

Speaker 2 I don't, I like them because it's with your friends, right? But as a performance, it's not the fucking. What the fuck is the guy in 48F

Speaker 2 by the ceiling

Speaker 2 in the hallway?

Speaker 2 What does he see? Yeah, this. Well, big screen.
This is what they're doing the whole show.

Speaker 2 I mean, they're up against the ceiling and they're looking at you on a mega. That's a guy talking.
Yeah,

Speaker 2 there's no ending back. But I would rather like tight, intimate venues where almost every seat is a good seat.

Speaker 1 It might go back to that. It's just not that.

Speaker 2 I never, if I was a fan in the early days and I went and saw Steve Martin in Berkeley, I wasn't thinking, I hope it's a great show. I wasn't even thinking like that.

Speaker 2 I wasn't thinking, I hope I'm going to laugh my ass off. I was just like, it's Steve Martin.
Well, that's, I think, a big piece of seeing someone face.

Speaker 2 Like Shane, you know, because he's all over YouTube. I'm seeing Shane, you know.

Speaker 1 That they're in your city. They're right there.

Speaker 2 Well, yeah, I mean, Shane's the most famous comic of our generation. He is a once-in-a-lifetime talent.
So I get why people just go to see him just to see him.

Speaker 2 But as a fan of comedy, I would hate to not be able to see the comedy. Right.
It would bug me. I'd be like, what? I can't even see the guy.

Speaker 1 You have to have screens at a certain level of room over like 2,500, 3,000. You have to have a screen because you have to see what the fuck's going on.
Plus, you're doing smaller.

Speaker 1 I work smaller and it'll throw away.

Speaker 2 You work very small. Very small.

Speaker 2 You're not even jokes. No, you're very good at working tiny little, like, your eye moves.
You do a lot of throw away. I'm being genuine.

Speaker 2 You're very good at like just very small, contained comedy moments. That's why you make me laugh so hard when I see you live.
But yes, you in a big room is, unless you've got a camera like that,

Speaker 1 that's tough. I'm going to jump on with Adam for a few of his, but his are always big rooms.
It's fun, again, fun people come on. Yeah, it's your picture.
Neil will be there, Schwartz and Man.

Speaker 2 How come Adam doesn't invite you? He does. He does.
But you don't go? I might. I might jump on a couple.

Speaker 1 To get Dana to get off his duck.

Speaker 2 I don't really like big, big shows. Like, here's it.
And then here's Nick Schwartz and here's David C. You know, and then here's, I don't really like.
Yeah. I'd rather

Speaker 2 just use it. To me, forgetting money would be like

Speaker 2 500-seat theater, 800-seat theater. 1,000 is kind of the magic.
Or 1,000 right on top of you. Like, what's the big, the rooms in Minneapolis, the one that has on raking on three sides?

Speaker 2 I used to play that a lot. I don't know.
I just did Pantages. That's why I filmed my special at the moment.

Speaker 1 I did did my special in Minnesota, too.

Speaker 2 You did Pantagious?

Speaker 1 Yeah, I think so. But even I both did.

Speaker 2 You play off the crowd, right? I mean, my act is not set, set. If they like something I'm doing, I'll just keep doing it.

Speaker 2 More and more, I've gotten more just jokes because of what's happened to people thinking that they're a part of the show. Yeah, and I don't like that.
Oh, I don't get that. Once it starts.

Speaker 2 Well, just kind of like that. I think because the internet is like...
Crowd work clips and clips and crowdwork stuff and talking back and like

Speaker 2 I'm not interested in that.

Speaker 2 at the club at the store at a club when we're working out yeah I can have some fun but when I'm doing the theater it's like dude I built you an hour that was the whole point of doing a theater tour otherwise you see me in the club you know it's funny it's more like if they love Biden I'll keep doing Biden but that's that's different that's you egging into what you do well doing what I would do with friends but now there's people out in the crowds that are like

Speaker 1 yeah because they want to be on a clip of you going what does this fucking idiot do oh they might be in a clip you know kirk fox i saw him this morning and he goes uh do you ever avoid people in the crowd i go avoid yeah first i don't like to do eye contact because if you're looking take shot of your head and someone's playing wordle in the front they're not even watching no so i don't like that and then if someone walks by and i say something like to your point earlier i don't want to start that up so when they come back kind of peacocking in i kind of quietly go to this side of the room so i don't see so you don't see them anymore and then they can't get my attention and then people go here he comes like he's gonna go into him i'm not a go-in to him guy so you don't i do a little bit if something's very obvious, but when you open that up, you just start hearing, Joe, they're yelling stuff.

Speaker 1 I don't even know what to answer.

Speaker 2 Well, because they're fans. I think the guy that yells the loudest likes you the most.
Yes.

Speaker 1 Ironically, they want to be known. They're the biggest fans.

Speaker 2 Sure. The people that don't like you are going to sit there and go, hmm.
The worst is when you're just looking at your acts going well and you see someone who's standing up all of a sudden.

Speaker 2 Hey, sorry, it's tell you. You know, once they stand up, you're like, or they're at the side of the stage in the old days in the clubs.
The guy's at the side of the stage.

Speaker 2 Do you defend the stage? I leave. Some guys go, let's fight.
No, I'm not going to fight some guys. Why don't you fight the guy? I'm going back to the holiday in.
You want it? You got it.

Speaker 2 Yeah, you have it. Take it.
Take it over.

Speaker 1 I'm going back to the Super 8. I'm going to relax.

Speaker 2 I'm going back to that Motel 6 against the Highway. I'm going to the best western

Speaker 2 Bozeman, Montana. Been there.
Have you? I've been there. With the walls thin.
Yeah. And the towels.
And the soap's mall. What? Yeah.
I'm from Montana, so. Bozeman.
Bozeman. Bozeman's a nice town.

Speaker 2 Montana. Bozeman.
I'm from Bozeman, Montana. They don't have a cell phone.
And there was a Pepsi machine outside of the window, and the hum was so loud I couldn't go to bed. It was like, woo.

Speaker 2 I know. We've had rapids.
We've got Pepsi. It's rough sewage in the room.
I mean, yeah, just like that. Always Pepsi.
Pepsi's always in the middle of the day. Montana's beautiful.
Trigger. Stunning.

Speaker 2 Trigger. Go there

Speaker 2 in the summertime and go around Flathead and Whitefish and

Speaker 2 Missoula where I was born and Bozeman. Do you still have a property there? No.
Why not?

Speaker 2 We were just driving toward Whitefish to buy a lake house in like 95 would have been maybe 600,000. Now it'd be 60 million.

Speaker 2 And somehow we go, let's have lunch. We didn't go buy it.
Shoulda, woulda, coulda. How good was the lunch? Shoulda, woulda, coulda.
You got 60 million? Go do it.

Speaker 2 Fried catfish and whitefish?

Speaker 2 No, they're not.

Speaker 2 That's not how he's fishing. That's how Mississippi used to fish.
What do they sound like in Montana? Montana? Hello, I'm from Montana. I don't really discern an accent.
I have a Montana accent.

Speaker 2 Don't let them throw you. I am from Montana.
I sound good on

Speaker 2 Montana.

Speaker 2 This is how we talk in Montana.

Speaker 2 Yeah. I got to get him to that guy.
All right. I have to go check out of the hotel.
I don't want to end this because it's a blast.

Speaker 1 No, but Andrew, I do want to end it. Let me see.

Speaker 2 A couple quick things before you go. You guys want to say? Let him have the floor.
I don't even think we got to say anything. We didn't do it too.
Well,

Speaker 2 white noise on Hulu. It's already.

Speaker 2 You got to keep promoting. So this would be a good question.
Please watch it. If you don't watch it, literally nothing changes, but I'd like you to.

Speaker 1 One last question. When you were on

Speaker 1 what singular thing or on the podcast moved the needle the most where you got where you felt a bump?

Speaker 2 In my career?

Speaker 1 Yeah, is it on shows? Is it Dave?

Speaker 2 Is it Dave felt a bump? I'm dying if it was a little bump.

Speaker 2 But Bad Friends is a bump.

Speaker 1 But Bad Friends was a slow bump or just one time something clicked?

Speaker 2 I think when we started the show, we started the show after Bobby got out of rehab when his dad died. And then funny, funny, funny, funny.
That's funny. I'm liking it so far.
His dad died.

Speaker 2 He went to rehab. Great premise.

Speaker 2 I put him in rehab because I was concerned about him. We were kind of like, you know, we were going through it a little bit.

Speaker 2 It was a big point of contention of our relationship being genuine because I was like, you got to get clean, dude. This is fucked up.

Speaker 2 And he was kind of holding it against me because he was like, you can't tell my girlfriend that I was using again.

Speaker 2 And I was like, well, this is going to ruin our entire friendship. And like, you're going to go.
This is bad.

Speaker 2 So we had this conversation.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I know. And then when he finally got clean, which was great, he got out and he was like, I think I'm ready to start that show.

Speaker 2 We had been talking about it because I had filled in for him on his show at Tiger Belly. The fans liked him.
We were together. And then we started the show.
I found the studio. We started the show.

Speaker 2 And

Speaker 2 no joke, but like COVID, thankfully, hit and people were at home. And you were already doing it.

Speaker 2 Within the first three months of us doing that show, COVID hit and the show exploded because people were at home, sad, weird, and bored. And they were like, well, this is an escapism.

Speaker 1 But you could still go in and do it.

Speaker 2 We did it from our studio.

Speaker 2 So we had, and the biggest joke is, or the the biggest inside thing is that little girl, Rudy, who is his ex-girlfriend's niece, this little girl that's on the show often, she was sent by his ex-girlfriend to make sure Bobby wouldn't go anywhere during COVID.

Speaker 2 So after we filmed, it was like, don't let him go eat somewhere or go somewhere or go track off into anywhere. Also, because he was fresh out of rehab.

Speaker 2 So she was like, make sure he's going to the meetings and to record the show. And that was it.

Speaker 2 And she became a fixture of the show and then became like a beloved figure of the, it was just kind of everything organically slotted into because we were we were just that show was just the most fun I've ever had fun to watch

Speaker 2 so sloppy chemistry it's stupid it's dumb it's I know I love it it's stupid it's all fun I did it we had a blast you guys need to be a lot dumber yeah I see you on the charts we're too up there you're around Conan numbers yeah no we're bigger than Conan for sure you're bigger I think most weeks I most weeks were number four or four to six which chart do you check uh Apple Podcasts were number four to six every week Spotify charts were sometimes higher But the only reason we're not any.

Speaker 2 Are you threatening Rogan or call me daddy? Oh, no, call me daddy.

Speaker 2 Call me daddy. Call me daddy.

Speaker 2 We're not going to threaten Rogan. I think the only reason we can't get any bigger is because we're

Speaker 2 immature. Yeah.
There's an audience of people that are not going to listen to how immature the show is. So we're never going to transcend this.
But if you guys are having fun, that's pretty

Speaker 2 less.

Speaker 2 It's the most fun. It's fucking killing it.

Speaker 1 It's money. It's fun.
It's so much better than out there.

Speaker 2 It's better than anything I've ever done. It's the only thing I've ever done that I like.
And if I get to keep doing it, great. Yeah.
And if not,

Speaker 2 this guy's replaceable.

Speaker 2 Why would he go? Phil's not replaceable.

Speaker 2 The cherry

Speaker 2 hates that I made that joke about him right at Philip.

Speaker 1 No, he's saying

Speaker 2 Chin will be on that table. Phil's mad.
He's fucking mad. Phil, I'm just saying.
Because his name is Bill.

Speaker 2 Bill? No, his name is Phil.

Speaker 2 Phil. And Ethan.

Speaker 2 Or Evan. He has no idea.

Speaker 1 Hey guys, if you're loving this podcast, which you are, be sure to click follow on your favorite podcast app.

Speaker 1 Give us a review, five-star rating, and maybe even share an episode that you've loved with a friend.

Speaker 2 If you're watching this episode on YouTube, please subscribe. We're on video now.

Speaker 1 Fly on the Wall is presented by Odyssey, an executive produced by Danny Carvey and David Spade, Heather Santoro and Greg Holtzman, Maddie Sprung-Kaiser, and Leah Reese Dennis of Odyssey.

Speaker 2 Our senior producer is Greg Holtzman, and the show is produced and edited by Phil Sweet Tech.

Speaker 1 Booking by Cultivated Entertainment.

Speaker 2 Special thanks to Patrick Fogarty, Evan Cox, Maura Curran, Melissa Wester, Hilary Schuff, Eric Donnelly, Colin Gaynor, Sean Cherry, Kurt Courtney, and Lauren Vieira.

Speaker 1 Reach out with us. Any questions to be asked and answered on the show? You can email us at flyonthewall at odyssey.com.
That's A-U-D-A-C-Yi.com.