Manchester City go long and Bournemouth are brilliant – Football Weekly

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Robyn Cowen is joined by Barry Glendenning, Will Unwin and John Brewin as Manchester City move back into the top four with a convincing route one display over Chelsea. Help support our independent journalism at theguardian.com/footballweeklypod

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This is The Guardian.

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Hello, and welcome to the Guardian Football Weekly.

Another weekend completely free of incident as far as Arsenal Football Club are concerned.

A routine 1-0 win away at Wolves with absolutely zero controversy and talking points.

Before that, we start at the Etihad, where Pep gets it launched to the big man, and Robert Sanchez tries to hit his step count with a poorly timed stroll to the edge of his area.

Then onto the vitality, John Bruin was there in the flesh to witness the world's greatest team hit Forest for five.

Elsewhere, the voice note of Damocles hangs over Ange Postacoglu as Dr.

Totler moves on from routine procedures to performing medical miracles by reviving the corpse of Leicester City.

Plus, some good fortune from Manchester United in West London.

David Moyes' 700th game in charge.

Penalty shenanigans from Brentford.

Your questions.

And that's today's Guardian Football Weekly.

Hello, everyone.

Robin Cowan here, filling in for Max, who has been handed a six-match ban following his Ange article, soaring towards the top of the ice cold take charts.

Still going.

On the panel today, good morning, Barry Glendening.

Hi, Robin.

You're on top forum already.

Little sleep, it seems.

It helps in a way.

Just tipped over the edge.

John Bruin, good morning.

Hi, Robin.

Good intro.

Good intro.

I can't take too much credit for that.

I need to say, Joel, the huge assists, producer Joel.

We've got to credit him.

We've got to credit.

He is the bastard.

He is, indeed.

Very good.

And Will Unwin, good morning.

Good morning, Robin, and well done to Joel as well.

Yeah, absolutely.

Needs his flowers.

How was nursery drop-off, Will?

She's far too heavy to be taken on my shoulders, shoulders, and I resent my daughter a lot at the moment.

Those backpacks are an absolute killer, aren't they?

Yeah.

Let's move on from that and start with the Premier League.

Manchester City 3, Chelsea 1.

Will, you were there at the Etihad.

Yeah, because of the context of what happened in midweek, this was very much a result that was needed.

What happened in terms of the first three minutes and that...

mistake from one of the new signings.

Did you see the final result coming?

I was mainly focused on hoping that Kusinov didn't cry in the first few minutes.

The next 87 minutes were pretty irrelevant at that stage.

Did you just want to go and give him a hug?

Yeah, I mean, something like that.

I mean, I've got blocked tear ducks, I can't cry, but that's a different story.

Prince Andrew over here.

Yeah, I know.

I can sweat.

Don't you worry about that.

But it was,

you know, obviously turn up in midweek.

He'd had a few training sessions, very much sort of mid-90s signing of don't know much about him, you know, having come from the Belarusian league and then launch and to, in the first few minutes, miss a pretty simple defensive header and then not really

knowing what to do afterwards and sort of flinging his head at it in a pitiful way, knowing that his goalkeeper was never going to get it, and then watching the ball go in after Jackson knocked it to Madowecki.

He looked crestfallen.

You know, I think I described it in my piece as, you know, a child trying to come up with a reason why he's broken the family heirlooms, wondering as his lip quivered waiting for his parents to come and shout at him and he didn't get much better than that actually uh for the next few minutes he got booked for taking down coal palmer he gave away the ball quite a bit it was really

really sad to see uh you know i remember mangala's debut for city also against chelsea 11 years ago and he was absolutely incredible a superb debut one of the best you'll ever see turned out he was absolutely rubbish which was unfortunate so i'm hoping that kusoff is the anti-mangala here and that you know, he starts off as bad as it gets, and he builds from it, and it gets a lot better.

And yeah, I think it puts City off their step early on.

Um, Bernardo Silva had to sort of drop back between the centre-box to get on the ball because every time it went to Kusanoff, it ended up with a Chelsea shirt.

But City rallied, you know, Chelsea missed another couple of good opportunities to make it two and three,

which helped City a lot.

And they managed to really get on the ball.

You know, maybe saying they controlled it would be generous, generous but they were the best I've seen for a while Gunduin had his best game since he's been back from Barcelona this moving this summer Gvardio was superb at left back Harlan physically dominated the centre backs and I'm not you know he's done well but I've not seen him do that do it to that level this season you know you see from his goal you know holding off Chalibur easily and he had similar with Colville it was a really good performance from him and Phil Foden was was fantastic too and I think it was just the performance that City needed that they've not not had fight a lot more energy and even in the final 10 minutes didn't actually look like conceding which

we've seen him collapse in so many games this season in Paris and here Feynman are too many to count to be honest but yeah hopefully Kusinov recovers and if you know if he wants a hug I'm available a match of the day two last night they ended with great Premier League nightmare debuts and uh Kushinov can take heart from the fact that several of the players who featured in that went on to have very, very illustrious Premier League careers.

So I think he was just first aid nerves.

There was such sadness in his eyes, Barry.

It was awful, wasn't it?

Like that dog, Kay Burley.

Exactly.

Highlighting.

You should put them together.

Have you ever seen those two in the same room?

I feel like it could have been a bit different, though, couldn't it, Barry?

I mean, we mentioned in the intro, Robert Sanchez had a hand in maybe one or two of the city

Yeah, but he's been a liability all season and he's probably not been helped by the fact that he's been sarcastically jeered or applauded by his own fans, that his manager has said he expects an awful lot more from see he's playing under you know even if you're playing well you're under pressure but when you're playing badly and you've been very publicly criticised by fans and manager it's not going to make your job any easier.

You know, we've been highlighting his mistakes since the start of the season I think so that was no big surprise i i thought city won fairly comfortably and it you know player city players who have not been playing well played well and that makes a huge difference uh

goondigan folden nunes played well he's that was probably his best game in a city shirt although it's a low bar uh ederson has some of his performances have been a bit iffy recently he played well uh his distribution was excellent and pep you know he's been trying to figure out how to solve this problem for weeks now, and he's hit upon the plan of getting it launched.

A route one.

Who knew the idea would be that simple?

And I think Chelsea made it a bit easy for City by leaving them vast meadows of grass to run into behind their defence.

You know, City really exploited that, Foden in particular, with the third goal.

And Maramouche had a good debut, I thought, and

him and Haaland look like they have the makings of a decent partnership.

John, were you sagely nodding your head at the nature of the get-it-launched goals?

You must have really enjoyed that.

Yeah, absolutely.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I mean, it's not the first time Pep's done that.

I mean, you go back to his time at Bayern Munich where they played against a Jürgen Klock managed Dortmund and decided to beat the press by just smashing it over the top.

Pep is someone that can vary his tactics.

That's one of the things about him.

And he's changed his tactics quite a lot since he's been in English football.

Now, the tactic he has at the moment, by just chucking in new signings, suggests it's a bit sort of Harry Redknapp.

Where's Cranchar?

Yeah, exactly.

Yeah, well, yeah.

Kevin Bond's,

you know,

it could be in Kevin Bond's window, the amount of deals they're doing at the moment.

Conspiracy theories suggest that

City fear a transfer ban for any possible legal difficulties that may come their way.

But, I mean, Will here is abreast of these things more than I am.

I've got to say this: Will, a lot of these players, I mean,

aside, I don't really know who these people are.

And Kusinov did look like someone just drafted in from the very fringes of European football to play in this game.

And it didn't really happen for him.

There's other players coming in, I believe.

Is it Cambiasso is one?

There's a Norwegian kid that everybody wants.

City with a club of careful planning, of building a team slowly, of

this old adage where, and Liverpool did this in the 80s, United, whatever, where you just add a couple of players

every summer, and then you just rebuild the team.

Suddenly, it's into the panics.

The thing is, not every player

is going to be good from the start.

And

if we're going back for terrible debuts, Will again will remember this one.

Pratrice Everer

was given his Manchester United Day at Manchester Derby, and Ferguson said to him, right, you're marking Sean Wright Phillips.

And this is Sean Wright Phillips, his very best, and we play, you know, man-to-man marking here.

And Evre had a nightmare and went on to be one of the best fullbacks we've ever seen in the Premier League.

And so it can happen.

Let's wish the young man the best, but I think his manager rather overexposed him.

City are desperate at the moment, aren't they?

They're desperate to have something to change.

And maybe it did change in that game.

But I do think Chelsea are one of those teams that can be relied upon to flop when it's their moment.

They're a bit flaky, and they're getting flakier.

Obviously, no one really wants to do business in January.

City never want to do business in January, but I mean, they have been absolutely awful for a lot of the season by their standards.

I can see why they've done it.

And then obviously the pool of players that you can sign is pretty limited.

So they've gotten young.

Vita Keish,

who's turned up from Palmaris at 18, he was on the bench as well, never centre-back, who can play right back.

So, they go young because they think there's more value in it long term because they're probably paying over the odds to get them in January.

Wouldn't have played Kusanov, but there was no other centre-backs really available.

I know Stones came on, but it's clearly not fit and was held off for as long as possible.

I was expecting John Stones to wander down the touchline after three minutes and one second on Saturday to start warming up, but was that wasn't done.

Uh, and Marmouche, yeah, paid every otter him.

I mean, I think he was available for about half the price in the summer.

Really looked really good,

and then that's it.

I think they've had to do it out of the sake of it because things couldn't get any worse.

You know, Marmouche was key to victory at the weekend.

He was really good, looked lively.

You know, if you could learn how to stay on side, that'd be great.

But yeah, I think it's just the case of needs must, and that you know, that's the free plays that were available that they could sign without being too silly about it.

I don't think they're worried about transfer embargoes at the moment.

I think they're pretty positive on

the case against them.

Harlan signed his nine and a half year deal.

I think they're feeling pretty positive.

Yeah, and yeah, Patrice Effer was absolutely bloody awful that day.

That was a good day, though.

That was in the montage, actually, on our match today.

Yeah, things couldn't get any worse, but they're now back up to fourth, Manchester City.

So, yeah, very odd, very odd season.

It's been Bournemouth five, Nottingham Forest nil.

John, you're at this game.

Yes.

I don't think you surely weren't expecting this result.

And on Nuno's birthday as well.

He's quite a likable chap, isn't he, Nuno?

He has real charisma, I think, in a very quiet way, that sort of Zen, almost Buddha style that he holds himself.

And

his team were bloody awful against Bournemouth, it's fair to say.

Though that actually, most of the credit for that goes to Bournemouth, aside perhaps for that that opening goal where you see Justin Clivert pick up the ball in his own half.

Now clearly Nuno has told the team the speed of Bournemouth attacking means it's best if we get back in numbers.

So you have Ola

Aina, is that how he pronounced his name?

He's running back.

He's running back and he's rubbernecking watching Clivert run.

And they're all running back.

And Clivert's thinking, is anybody going to take?

And at a certain point point, you actually see Clivet sort of say, nobody.

They just shoot.

And of course, the ball goes through a forest of legs and beyond a hapless goalkeeper.

And, you know, you have the first goal.

And Forrest did what they often do in a game is that they put a bit of muscle into it, got a bit of...

you got got back into the game and Langer versus Lewis Cook was a key battle that Lewis Cook, one of those players playing out of position, because he only had 12 fit players, actually won, even though he got an early yellow card.

And then in the second half, Bournemouth just put them to the sword.

And the thing is, the third goal that they scored that was ruled out by VAR, that followed a sequence of attacking of this sort of wave and wave of Bournemouth attacking where the book

Forrest just could not get the ball out.

And then it slotted home by Clyvert.

And, you know, the gods of VAR denied what

could have been one of those goals of the season.

It It was just brilliant to watch because you could just feel it building up, up, up, up, and then they score.

And you think, oh, well, Forrest have been lucky there.

But then Bournemouth just score anyway because they can.

And Uatara, who,

as

Iraola said afterwards, has played left back, he's played left wing, he's played right wing, now he's playing centre-forward.

And the thing is with Bournemouth, they're doing this thing where they have 12 players and they're showing how teams used to do it, which was they had 12 players, and then one of them gets injured, another one moves around, you've got one sub that can come on and run around, and he has to play various different positions.

They were absolutely fantastic, but it's no surprise to see them do that to a good team because they've beaten Manchester City, and they beat them deservedly, they beat Liverpool, they've beat Arsenal, they play Liverpool next week.

That's just a delight to watch at the moment.

And Irayola's star rises and rises, and he's such a

you know, him and Nuno share a few qualities, don't they?

Quite shy, quite friendly,

don't really pull any punches.

I mean, Nuno, after the game, would just say, you know, why did you lose the game?

Oh, they were much better than us.

You know, there was no, or I thought we were a bit unlucky.

What about this decision in the 10th minute, or whatever?

It was just we got done there, and everything went wrong for us.

We didn't do what we were supposed to.

But Irayola has that quiet charm.

He is an ideologue, he follows in the BLS

line of thinking.

But I also think there's a humanity to him as well.

He's not completely, you know, he's not a mad professor.

He sees it for what it is.

He sees there is a levity there.

There is a life beyond.

But, you know, I don't think he's sat up all night reading Jonathan Wilson books.

He's just.

He'll have been up all night if he wrote Wilson or read Wilson's column, yes.

Yeah, we'll get to that surely.

I mean, it's

rocking in a corner

what the hell was that

what's he done now but no um

but um i i think

okay let the if not to go and see all the book the thing is uh i i i know a few bournemouth fans over the years and the eddie how years were seen as that you know that club's apex weren't they they'd gone all that way But the thing is, the fans got a bit annoyed by the fact that they were fighting relegation and the best they could hope for was mid-table.

And that some of them would say, it was better in the championship when we were beating everybody.

They cannot have expected their club to be, you know, the most talked about club in the Anglophone world because of the football that they're playing.

And that choice of, I mean, Gary O'Neill did a fine job for them.

The decision to go for Irayola and remove Gary O'Neill.

was

a masterstroke, whoever made it.

And you've got that group of players that manchester city wants to buy everybody and they must look at bournemouth and say can we just have them please because that that they would do the job wouldn't they for pepperardiola this is the problem isn't it they're probably going to be picked apart um depending on where they finish i suppose uh will you've covered forest quite closely it's going to be interesting to see if this is a sort of

I wouldn't say spiral, but if they kind of revert to maybe the mean and where people expected them to be, or whether this was just a really, really bad day at the office where, as Jonathan, said, they kind of forego defending.

Yeah, I'm at the Brighton game next week, so it'll be fascinating to see how they recover from this, you know, a proper trouncing and a terrible performance and defensively being so good, which makes it even more surprising, especially against a team that have got no centre forward.

Although, it seems to have improved them.

So, yeah, I mean, the bigger question is when things go badly at Forest in the past, they panic.

And with a week left of the transfer window, I sort of wonder what they might do, what WhatsApps were going around from Mr Maranakis suggesting they sign Rashford and the ghost of Pele or something.

So

that's the question.

They've got so much right this season, they've been very steady, you know, I'm sure they've wanted to add a striker this window, which obviously wouldn't have helped them much on Saturday, I appreciate.

But I think they just need to recover,

get back, play Brighton, good chance of beating Brighton who obviously lost to Everton this week, and not worry too much about it, get out of existence.

These things happen, Look,

they shouldn't be in the top four, let's be honest.

They

should be battling for seven, eighth, ninth.

So they're doing incredibly well.

So don't panic.

Stay calm.

You know, get a teacup with some message on of a

similar note.

And yeah, don't worry about it.

Football is what it is.

You know, bad results come along.

They're never going to define your season one defeat against a really good Bournemouth team.

And yeah, don't do anything stupid is my advice.

I think cutaway of the weekend was the the box of Bournemouth

Bournemouth injured players wasn't it it looked at Fraser says that box all of the injured Bournemouth players fit inside looked like tremendous fun didn't it Barry

and uh yeah but producer Joel pointing out it was like a David Blaine exhibit which is a very good observation

yeah I certainly can't top that and I mean And Postakoglu must be looking at Bournemouth going, oh, lads, you're not doing me any favours here.

But

absolutely.

I wonder, is that do they just keep all their injured players in a big aquarium

until they're ready to come out again?

But yeah, I mean, nothing revenue stream, isn't it?

You know, you can pay to observe it.

It was a brilliant performance.

I think there is an aquarium in Bournemouth, isn't there?

We've been singing the praises of Milenkovich and Murillo all season.

I think it's time to go, lads, that was a shocker.

They really had a shocker.

They were awful.

They really were.

I mean, they are big lads as well, and they just were made to look like, you know, sort of lumbering by.

And actually, I'd say Taylor Blair made them look lumbering.

He's the center half for,

is it Hoyson?

Wow.

I mean, like, again, there is a player.

I mean,

Ben Fisher did a very good interview with him last week and, you know,

wrote a lot that I didn't know about him, but this guy was at Juventus.

He was at Roma, and they let him go.

And you're thinking, What are you doing?

I mean, he, like, if Liverpool want a replacement for Virgil Van Dijk, there's your guy.

There's your guy that is bringing the ball out of defence, that strolling player, that Alan Hanson player that Liverpool always have,

there's your guy.

And I'm sorry, Bournemouth fans, I don't want to sell you star player, but that's how that's how these things work.

But what a player.

And

you just think,

you know, and actually, you know, Liverpool did poach Bourne was the director of football, Richard Hughes, of course.

So, you know, they're obviously thinking along those lines, but yeah, I mean,

it bums show that it can be done.

They have had money.

Let's not, it's not, it's not, it's not done on a shoestring.

You can't do things on a shoestring, but it's been done well, and it shows other teams who will get to, I'm sure, that you can build a team.

Well, in part one, there, in part two, it's what we've all been waiting for.

It's more and chat.

Coach, the energy out there felt different.

What changed for the team today?

It was the new game day scratchers from the California Lottery.

Play is everything.

Those games sent the team's energy through the roof.

Are you saying it was the off-field play that made the difference on the field?

Hey, a little play makes your day, and today it made the game.

That's all for now.

Coach, one more question.

Play the new Los Angeles Chargers, San Francisco 49ers, and Los Angeles Rams Scratchers from the California Lottery.

A little play can make your day.

Please play responsibly, must be 18 years or older to purchase, play, or claim.

Welcome to part two of the Guardian Football Weekly.

Spurs 1, Leicester 2.

Isaac says, currently trying to pass a kidney stone while watching Tottenham, Leicester, it's a full body pain experience.

All the best, thanks for a great podcast, Isaac, and thank you for that.

Ian, are there going to be two St.

Tottering's Days this season?

One for Arsenal in February and one for West Ham in April.

Barry, one of your brilliant predictions as ever.

You could see Leicester winning this one.

Ah, come on.

I think everyone could see Leicester winning this one.

Oh, I'm not sure.

I'm not sure.

I'll try and get through this without using the medical reference or the adjective

that are commonly associated with Tottenham Hotspur.

I didn't think they were terrible in this game.

I've seen them play a lot worse.

I'll start by saying that.

I don't think it was a huge surprise.

We have to factor in all the injuries, but then add the Bournemouth caveat.

They're missing Madison, Spence, Vicario, Romero, Solanke, Dogie, Johnson, Werner, Van der Venn, Papisar, Basuma, Odebert.

That's a lot of players out injured.

Although there seems to be some suggestion that James Madison wasn't injured, but just sore.

So I don't know what the difference is, particularly.

Could he have come on for 20 minutes or so?

I don't know.

But it's another bad, bad result for Ange.

Tottenham have now taken one point from 21.

They've lost 13 games this season.

The fans are unhappy.

They seem to be more unhappy with Daniel Levy than they are with Ange Postacoglou, which seems fair enough because he isn't supporting Ange Postacoglo and he hasn't really supported quite a number of the is it 16 managers that have he's seen off or

not well 15 and Ange who might be seen off fairly soon but

yeah a really really good result for Leicester

who come from behind Jamie Vardy trolling the the Spurs fans was quite fun 38 years old never changed Jamie yeah

well you see I mean, just in reference, we spoke about it being Nuno's birthday on Saturday.

I was shocked to learn he's younger than me because he seems much more of a grown-up than I am.

So maybe I'm more in the Varity school of immaturity and it's to be applauded, I think.

I agree.

I'm really struggling on the Ange question.

I would quite like to see him left there, but if he is left there, he will have got a lot more rope than many of his predecessors.

I think a lot of people want to see him succeed, but he, the fact of the matter is, he isn't succeeding, he's failing dismally as things stand.

But if he's let go now, he can say, Look, look at all the players I'd injured.

It's kind of a justifiable excuse or a valid excuse.

So I would like to see him left there until he gets some of his good players back.

You're also worried about if he isn't Max's mental state.

Well, I'm not worried about Max's mentality.

I just want Max to be here when it happens.

Don't worry, we'll make sure we get comment from Max Rushton

if the voice note does have to happen.

Yet, 15th in the table, one point ahead of Everton, having played a game more.

He was, of course, asked about his future, and he said, Who knows?

I think he did say, Who knows, mate?

When you're the manager of a football club, you can be very vulnerable, isolated.

I don't feel that.

I feel like this group of players are giving everything for the club.

I have a group of staff that is really committed.

I focus on that.

My role within that is to support and try with these players.

Well, it's an interesting one, isn't it?

Do we think that if they had perhaps lost and lost maybe more handsomely to Liverpool in that first leg of the Carabao Cup semi-final, maybe he might be

the trigger might be pulled more readily and then the Ryan Mason glass would be would be pulled again maybe if they reach the final.

Yeah, I think he'll survive sort of the second leg.

I think that's pretty safe at this point.

It'd be a tricky one to

do at this stage.

He's got a good chance of making a final.

I suspect he'll probably get beat about 4-0 in that second leg, and that might tip everyone over the edge.

The thing is, he's got a lot of excuses about injuries and whatnot, but

so the squad has changed, basically.

What is available to him has changed, but he's decided to stick to his guns for his own style.

Yeah, that's his philosophy, etc.

and it's not working and he's not adjusting to the fact that he's not got his first 11 available that midfield was you know poor yesterday very poor you know saar wasn't fit etc and so forth and it's you know philosophy managers at the moment you know real sort of bugbear of mine that you know john mentioned before that quadiola keeps changing he evolves these people have to evolve russell martin got sacked because he couldn't change he's not going to walk into a job in the championship having a squad available to play the football he wants.

You have to adapt as a manager.

I've come up with a Guardian metaphor for this.

It's like people who are sort of bastions of natural wine and think it's good.

It's not.

It's awful.

You can make better wine.

You don't have to have this.

You can adapt and make good stuff.

Stop telling us that this is the only way of doing it.

It's nonsense.

Natural wine?

Yeah, it's horrible.

New one on me.

Yeah,

me and Barry don't get to do these

tipples.

It tastes like orange squash that's been fermented next to a radiator then used as an ashtray, but you'll get really sort of fancy sommeliers going, oh, this has got a lovely bouquet, etc.

Or you can really taste the tobacco.

I don't want to taste the tobacco, mate.

I want to taste wine.

You've really come up in the world since I first met you.

You've been like knocking around with sommeliers.

Yeah, you know.

This is what you get when you're from Gorton.

I'm basically the

other brother from Shameless.

Yeah, this is social climber.

Yeah.

Before we move on, Wilson's column.

Ah, go, everyone.

Well,

I wish I could explain it, but um

Jonathan took an offbeat look, let's put it that way, uh, and delved into the theories of Timothy Leary, uh, uh a man best known, of course, for his uh

championing of LSD.

Uh though this wasn't uh a lysergic theory that Jonathan was following, but it appeared to

some sort of psychological profiling of Ange Postacoglou

involving T-Rexes, monkeys

mice mice I think the point is that

it was probably not that dissimilar from Will's which was that And probably needs to adapt mate because it's not really going to happen for him and you know

the thing is about Ange, his football philosophy is one that he,

when he was the other side of the world, clearly watched a lot of Pep Guardiola football, decided that was for him.

But football has moved on now, as we've seen.

Pep Guardiola's had to adapt.

Pep Guardiola is struggling with modern football.

The other day, he was talking about how quick players are the way forward.

Now, talking about the teams that he thought were good, and they were Liverpool, they were Bournemouth, and the rest of it, and Newcastle,

the strong teams.

and it appears to me that Ange is struggling to adapt.

But I'm not sure that's what Jonathan was saying because all I know is that I spent a lot of the weekend with being sent excerpts from Jonathan's column,

which was

absolutely fantastic.

I would just like to stress the point: I am a huge Wilson fan, he's a great man, I love him to bits,

but that was just peak Wilson.

me too, me too.

He's a good friend, yes.

And

my heart goes out to whoever it is is curating Sued's corner in private eye for the next issue because

that one isn't going to fit.

It's not going to fit in.

I mean,

they're going to have to

do a double page.

I actually can safely predict it starts with that, continues, brackets, continues, and then, yeah.

I mean,

he must have smashed the all-time entries for one entry

for Suzy Corner.

It was absolutely unbelievable.

Well done, Jonathan.

We salute you, Jonathan Wilson.

Wolves nil, Arsenal 1, a California with a lovely finish.

And I think that's really the headline here, isn't it?

Oh, but now are you gaslighting Arsenal fans here?

This is it.

Oh, yeah, you see, already, already.

Locations turned off no speaking conspiracy theories begin you gaslight them by laughing at them that they've they've had this great injustice done against them and

you're trying to skip it you're trying to skip away from it

what you're doing to me John Bray you're allowing the PGO ML this this but this body that are acting unilaterally sorry Robin I've just got across your book but there's a weird thing about Arsenal fans and a lot of other people think the PGOML PGO

M-O-L M-O-L.

They are,

you know, you watch these American procedurals and like one government department's gone rogue, like the Justice Department or a grand jury or, you know, or some sort of attorney or

in a more sort of more parochial English thing where you've got

a local council, a parish council, and

one of the committees is going a bit rogue, and the other ones can't control them.

That appears to be the way that the referees' body, as led by Hard Webb, are depicted by those.

They feel they get justice, but they're mavericks.

Yeah, they're taking the law into their own hands.

They're in too deep, Pachansky.

You know, it's, it, it's, and it's just refereeing.

It's just refereeing.

It's just decisions.

Well, let's let's have a debate because, I mean, who do we, do we think that?

Because I obviously you don't, I didn't see it, and then you get all the colour going this is the worst decision ever seen in the history of the and i just wonder barry am i being contrary when i kind of when when someone tells you this is the best film or the best tv program they've ever seen and you watch and you think it's okay you know but i don't get the hype do you can you see why the red card was given or is it the most outrageous decision you've ever seen i think three things can be true i think you can think it was a terrible decision

and i i do think it was a terrible decision i've seen worse but that was a terrible decision.

I can totally understand the anger of Arsenal fans and I also have no sympathy for them whatsoever because quite a few of them, an increasing number, are behaving like big babies.

So yeah, I think it was a bad decision and then the PGMOL doubling down on it yesterday was worse because they're behaving in a Trumpian, almost Orwellian manner.

You know, the PGMOL told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears.

It was that.

It was their final, most essential command.

And that seems to be what's happened.

They've told us to ignore what we all saw and telling us that we saw something else.

It's like the Elon Musk fallout after he did that double fascist salute.

With regard to Arsenal fans being outraged about it, This has led apparently to Michael Oliver getting threats, which is not acceptable.

And Arsenal fans have been posting these numbers.

Oh, he's given us more red cards than anyone else.

Well, that's fine, but they're just numbers, unless I see every single red card he's given.

You judge each one on its merits.

So maybe quite a few of them were deserved.

Maybe he's given other teams red cards they didn't deserve.

I haven't seen all those red cards, or I can't remember them, so I'm not in a position to comment.

And then, you know, there were other egregious decisions over the weekend, quite a few of them.

Is that that evidence of a conspiracy illman in jai was booked for impersonating a bird that's ridiculous outrageous that should have been a red

alvarez uh for west ham avoided a third he should have got three yellow cards he only got one uh and ciso should have been red carded for a challenge on endo watoru uh he only got a yellow and i you could argue that

martinez should have been sent off against fulham so you know are these all different conspiracies or is it just Arsenal who are the victims of a conspiracy?

So there's an awful lot to win pick here, but at the end of the day, it didn't really matter because they won.

It was a very good defensive performance for them.

So, you know,

fair play, I suppose.

But yeah,

it was a terrible decision, in my opinion, but I have no sympathy for them.

Yeah, Wolves also had a player sent off, Xiao Gomez.

I do like the way Vito Pereira, the Wolves manager, really keeps his cards close to his chest, doesn't he?

Jao Gomez got his first show of cards for kicking the ball away.

I was under the impression that only happens to Arsenal players.

Did any of them complain about that?

No.

Listen, it's not every Arsenal fan.

Let's not start

the lunatic fringe with...

But quite a few of them are Arsenal fans with a big influence.

Yeah, that's true.

That's true.

And Declan Rice won against Brighton back in

what feels like several years ago is still regarded as like

changing moment in in football.

Listen, my view of the Lewis Skelly thing is, listen, we all know the tactical foul.

Yeah, it's certain teams have built empires around it.

But

it

was a pretty poor attempt at it and it was just a trip.

And I think in rugby union, if you did that, you'd be sent off.

Which obviously is a different sport.

I'm not saying we have the same rules as that.

Their view is that it was high it was deeply cynical no attempt to play the ball you could see why it was given as a red i don't think it was one of the worst seasons of all time

and

they won you won the game louis kelly might learn a lesson which is if you're going to be cynical mate whoever's telling you to do this trying to tell him if you're going to be cynical

you know get your body across him just nudge into him or whatever don't just trip him up like that.

Like, it was like a schoolboy's, you know, like, say you're running across the schoolyard and your mate just trips you over.

It was like that type of thing.

It wasn't a football move.

That's probably why he got sent off for it.

Yeah, not playing the ball.

So Arsenal do win, but it seems to be just a real slog for them.

Yeah.

Unlike Liverpool, who beat Ipswich 4-1.

I mean, Will, it just seems quite effortless at the moment for Liverpool, doesn't it?

They've got the most balanced squad in the league by distance.

They've got six forwards that they can rotate as they like and they all seem in form maybe apart from Nunes and Kiesa's sort of getting up to speed but yeah lots of options and at the heart of it they've got Van Dijk and Canate looking like the the best defensive partnership now that Milenkovich and Maria you know need to retire with Gravan Birch you know synced in with them superbly it's yeah it's a complete team everyone high as a kite happy as Larry with the form playing teams off the park I know it's switchesn't the most difficult at the moment, so you showed what you can do to them.

But yeah, it's a very cohesive unit, everything's working,

you know, morale's really high, and they're not fearful of anyone.

Even when it was difficult at Foresty Week, when I was there, you know, kept going, kept

battering down the door, and eventually got a goal.

So, yeah, they're going to win the league.

I think we can all accept that.

We can probably gloss over them most weeks from now on and just talk about it when they've lifted the trophy.

Because it's going to take a bit of a slump from now to give it up, I'd say.

Yeah, we're in January, and they still haven't played anyone any good, have they?

Um, yeah, Bournemouth next week.

And the question I had was: did Arna Slot's dad think they played well against Ipswich?

Because, of course, he is now the major critic, saying they were boring against Lille.

But

it does show you how easy it's been for Liverpool.

I love that, however old you are, your parents are still going to slap you down.

It's great, isn't it?

I absolutely love that.

Fulham Nil, Manchester United, won.

Lautara Martinez with a deflected strike.

Talking of deflecting tactics, I loved Ruben Amering's comment about Marcus Rashford.

Do we think that their

68-year-old goalkeeping coach is a better trainer than Marcus Rashford?

I think this is the big question, isn't it?

I mean, again, do we think this, because Rashford makes good copy, doesn't he?

And is this a kind of big deflection as to another pretty unconvincing Manchester United display, Barry?

I don't know enough about Amarim's previous musings in his old job or previous jobs to know how he operates, but he strikes me as someone who just speaks his mind, has decided Marcus Rashford is not for him and wants to get rid of him.

I can't see Rashford coming back from this.

Stranger things have happened, I suppose, but I don't think Rashford wants wants to be at the club.

I don't think American wants him at the club.

I'm clearly, obviously, not in a position to judge Rashford's training performances.

Is he turning up late?

Is he not putting in the effort?

I don't know, but I don't really know the answer to your question.

It might be a deflection tactic because, I mean, this was a dog of a game.

It was played at a horrible time.

So slow hand clap, whoever was responsible for that.

It was played in horrible weather.

And I think Manchester United just drew out, got away with it, but it's a very, very valuable win for them.

Fulham's record at home against United is absolutely atrocious.

But again, you feel like Fulham could possibly have won every single game this season.

They seem to be very unfortunate, and you get that hang dog expression from Marco Silver so often.

It just looks so sad.

Janny Infantino was at this game.

He was also at Manchester City versus Chelsea, having been at the inauguration of Donald Trump, the holy triumvirate of events,

you might say.

That'll do for part two.

In part three, we'll round up the rest of the Premier League action.

Coach, the energy out there felt different.

What changed for the team today?

It was the new game day scratchers from the California Lottery.

Play is everything.

Those games sent the team's energy through the roof.

Are you saying it was the off-field play that made the difference on the field?

Hey, a little play makes your day, and today, it made the game.

That's all for now.

Coach, one more question.

Play the new Los Angeles Chargers, San Francisco 49ers, and Los Angeles Rams Scratchers from the California Lottery.

A little play can make your day.

Please play responsibly.

Must be 18 years or older to purchase play or claim.

Welcome to part three of the Guardian Football Weekly, Brighton 0, Everton 1, an Everton penalty from Illiman and Die.

Interestingly, there was a bit of debate about this one as well, Will, whether this was a penalty or not in the Match of the Day studio on Saturday.

I mean it looked like he'd kind of punched the ball out of play to me, so fairly clear cuts.

I'm in Camp Lineker on this.

I don't think it was a penalty.

I think his, I mean, no one in their right mind is punching the ball like that, facing their own goal, when really there probably wasn't as much danger as you might think.

So I can't see that his thought process was that he should punch the ball away to stop everton from having a shot because everton don't score anyway so it doesn't really matter that much if what's happening in the area and so i think he got pressure in behind and his arm moved and he was sort of pretty helpless but yeah shearer and murphy were sort of in disgusted to think that it was it might have been an accident it was like it's nailed on it's a stone waller so you know and i am a professional footballer now i've trained with harrogate once so i you know i know what i'm talking about but yeah i did think it was a penalty

but weren't you in goal?

You were actively.

Yeah, because I know who can and can't use hands.

You can't pull the ball away or palm it away.

Exactly.

I know how hands should be used.

Look at them, Barry.

Look at them.

Admittedly, I didn't really punch much that day.

But yeah, I don't think it was a penalty.

I thought it was really harsh.

Maybe I'm too nice.

I'm just known for being such a nice guy.

Generous.

John, 700th game for David Moyes.

A 1-0 win.

I mean, could it be any better for him?

Well, he did say, didn't he, that he thought his heart might give out in the second half.

Brighton put the pressure on.

David Moyes,

it appears Everton aren't going to go down, and that there is another way than just settling for the Sean Deich experience of just hanging on grimly.

And that,

listen, David Moyes is not going to play Andone Ireola football, but he's going to at least try and win games and not just settle for a draw and not just stop games happening at all, which appeared to be the dice planned by the end of it.

And,

you know, the guy that popularised the

phrase the People's Club for Everton looks like the guy that's going to lead them into the new stadium, which I think is nice.

It's nice, and I think Everton have suffered enough.

And I think it's nice that we've got

Moisie back and

it's going to be a safe route to Bramley Moore Dock.

Yeah, and Die,

actually, we talked about the Sean Dyson thing.

There's a really good player.

Really, really good player.

Use him a bit more and you might get something out of him.

Don't, you know, it's the thing is with that Everton squad, sure, it's got holes in it, but it's always had talent in it, and there is something to be released from that.

As regards Brighton, very hit and miss this season, aren't they?

Yeah.

Sometimes you just think, wow, this guy, this kid, this kid as he is to some of us here,

has really nailed it.

All of us.

Yeah, all of us, yeah.

Okay.

Yeah,

you just think this kid's really nailed it, and then other times not.

But again, that's to do with the fact that he will learn.

And also, there's a lot of players coming in out, and he's got quite a big squad to balance and a lot to move around.

Yet it doesn't quite work.

Like the strikers aren't quite there and

they don't score enough goals that would you know brightener just brought bright and i just i think that's that's probably gonna be their role in life over the next few years of just

good season bad season never really in trouble they're too well run aren't they oh yes the well won claxon and also yeah it seems like i think jamie vardi did a seagull celebration as well when he scored against them um so they've got to put up with that um it seems like every time.

But yeah, booking for that seems a

little bit much, isn't it?

Is that exciting the crowd?

I don't know.

They must take, I mean, they're probably very proud of their seagulls, and maybe it was just a bit much from NDI.

Well, I was told yesterday by Charlie Baker that there's no such thing as a seagull, it's just a gull.

Yeah, if he'd swooped into the crowd and stolen someone's chips, then yeah, maybe give him a yellow card for that.

You know, because that's typical gull behaviour down Brighton Brighton Way, but otherwise, I thought it was quite harsh.

You know, it's at Bournemouth, just as an aside, I thought there must be some gulls around here, you know, using the correct term.

I didn't see any.

What happened to gulls in Bournemouth, though?

There you go.

Maybe Bournemouth's just where elderly gulls go to retire.

They're next door to Sunas and Harry Redknapp in sandbarracks.

Yeah, they were holding their wings on a bench down by the beach.

Southampton won, Newcastle United United three.

I mean, Newcastle were absolutely battered last weekend.

Can't read too much into this.

I mean,

Will, what do you think it's like being a Southampton player at the moment?

I mean, because it's just like you go out there every week, you get beat, you know, you're going to be in the championship next season.

It must be absolutely miserable.

That's despite taking the lead, by the way, as well.

Yeah, I mean, they took the lead at United as well.

I mean, they took the lead at United, and

no one inside the ground really with with five, ten minutes ago, was expecting anything other than United to come back and get something, even with United being so dreadful.

Yeah, they make a lot of mistakes, which doesn't help.

I mean, you big sign in the summer, Ramsdale's out injured, so you end up with Alex McCarthy.

No offense to the poor lad, but probably not a Premier League goalkeeper now.

Yeah, if you're Southampton players, probably waiting for the end and expecting your wages to be cut, or you get sold on to someone slightly better, or you end up in League Un because that's, you know, that's probably what these players should settle for yeah they had a bad summer I think in terms of recruitment spent a lot of money on players that weren't up to it you know Ben Burris and D has already wandered off back to Sheffield United Cameron Archer's not seemed particularly great yeah it's a pretty underwhelming squad to be honest and they've made so many mistakes it must ruin morale change of manager has sort of made them a little bit more stable but even then you know it's just staring down the barrel continuously Newcastle and you know when you go against Newcastle at the moment incredible midfield Tenale's been excellent recently since he's dropped a bit deeper.

And you're playing against arguably the best striker in the Premier League at the moment in Isaac.

So, yeah, you must just live in fear and just

wait to go home, have a nice cup of tea, and not worry about it until City turn up next week or something like that.

I was going to say about Southampton.

I was joking with a colleague, actually, one of your colleagues, Robin.

We may never have to get to know Ivrika Yurich's name.

It's sort of, you know, like, it's it's

because

it does seem like a.

It's going to be a very deep-cut pub quiz, isn't it?

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, yeah, it's like, it's like...

Managed Southampton, what?

Oh, right, yeah.

I mean, it's, there's a couple of managers like that, aren't they?

You sort of come in and you think, I mean, Rude Vanissoro is one that, you know, you know, managed Leicester for 15 games in the 2025, but now turned that around.

But yeah, taking on that job, wow.

You know, they were down way before they sacked Russell Martin.

So it's sad because

there is a club there and there are ambitions there, but they have made some bad choices of recruitment across all departments.

It is a worry for me that their former head of football is now at Manchester United, but there you go.

Yeah.

Well, Dan Ashworth didn't last long, so we'll have to see if he goes the same way.

Villa won, West Ham United won.

Six games without a win post-Champions League for Villa.

I suppose that was fairly predictable given, you know, they've not been in the Champions League for quite a while.

Barry, it seems like they're generally signs of life a little bit for West Ham.

I mean, they're not going to go down.

They weren't really going to, I don't think they're going to go down under Lopotegie, but it seems like slowly seeing a little bit more from them.

I didn't think they were going to go down under Lopotegie only because there was almost certainly going to be three teams way worse than them.

Whereas now, as you say, they're showing signs of life that there's a potentially a good team there and I'm not surprised because Graeme Potter is a good manager despite what happened to him at Chelsea I thought they were maybe a little bit lucky in this game because I've already mentioned Alvarez should have been sent off he provided the assist for the goal with a nice cross for Emerson decent result for them Una Emery was not in his technical area because he was banished to the stands for previous offences.

Villa fans, I'd say, were quite concerned to see Tyron Mings go down with what looked like a worrying injury, but he was all smiles by the end of the game on the bench and posted it

on social media that it's not a serious injury, so good for him.

There was a lot of very childish play acting in this game as well.

Lucas Paquetta at the heart of quite a lot of it.

He's had quite an up-and-down season, and I worry, well, I presume the consequences of this investigation into

his pals' betting activities is hanging over him because that could have very, very serious repercussions for him.

He protests his absolute innocence and says he'll do everything he can to prove his innocence.

So hopefully he can.

Because if he can't, that could be the end of him.

Seemed a fair result.

It was very much a game of two halves.

Aston Villa bossed the first half, West Ham boss the second.

And maybe if Uni Emery had been on the touchline, he might have been in a position to do something about that.

Crystal Palace 1, Brentford 2, a couple of things to really enjoy in this one.

In particular,

Johan Wisser's marvellous flex, especially after Brian and Boomo had missed the first penalty.

He was ordered to be retaken.

And he celebrated even before I think he started the run-up.

Absolutely magnificent stuff from Joan Wisser.

And then also SA.

Barney, as a Millwall fan was saying, is going to be going to be excellent.

Scored, I think, with his first touch.

Did a knee slide.

No one was joining him because it was still 2-1.

It was five minutes to go on the clock.

A good away win this, John, for Brentford.

I know you've seen them quite a lot because they've not been great away from home, have they?

Do you know what?

I don't think I've actually seen Brentford away from home.

I always see them at Brentford.

So I see the good Brentford most of the time.

And yeah,

it feels strange to see them have to grind out.

results in the way that they did there.

I mean, Thomas Frank continues to do such a great job there.

And again, I don't want to, you know, take anyone away from the club where they've done such a great job, but why he isn't considered for

actually, I think

I actually credit Thomas Frank with enough sense not to take the Tottenham job.

But, you know, he but

he would be a great manager for them, I believe, because he he's so adaptable, sensible, rational.

Hey, listen, that could all go out the window when you're at Tottenham.

But I just think, yeah, Brentford again, we're back to the well-run cliché, aren't we?

And it serves him so well.

And, but, you know, Buemo, Wissa, Damsguards, you know, passing is fantastic, isn't it?

You know, what a fine he is.

I mean, I think there's a player.

I think he's got rheumatoid arthritis, hasn't he?

And he's playing through, which is a very painful condition.

I know from family issues with it.

And yeah, you know, he is an excellent, excellent player, and they continue to unearth jewels.

And yeah,

good stuff, but yeah, I the the the um the celebration when no one else is celebrating is is one if you ever watch the the big match from the 80s or whatever you you see it a bit more often or the 70s when players were probably a bit more self-regarding you know they'll celebrate a goal when a 3-1 down or something but now it is very much frowned upon isn't it i think it's okay for him isn't it his first premier league goal is debut.

But yeah,

he'll probably be accused by people of not being a team player, won't he?

People.

We've established we don't really like people.

I'm sick of it.

And I include myself among this large group of people.

Leo says a word for Tony Mowbray getting his first win back after beating Cancer and it was a 5-1 demolition back at the Hawthorns.

Yes, wonderful to see him and a great result.

There was a brilliant interview with Tony Mowbray in the Athletic a couple of weeks ago, which I think was conducted by Michael Walker, formerly this parish, who, yeah, I couldn't be happier for him.

He just seems like an absolute top man.

He's a great guy.

He's a great guy.

And I was at a Westbrom Birmingham game last year, before, not long before probably he got in the news, and there was a racist incident in the crowd.

And Tony Mowbray, you know, who's an old school guy, spoke with the most sentence I've ever seen about that type of incident.

You know, just totally on the level, a really inspiring man.

You know, speak to fans of Middlesbrough.

You were an absolute hero, and it is great to see him back in the game.

And all the best, Tony Mowbray.

Absolutely.

And Luke says, can we have a Ryan Loft minute from Max?

You can't, I'm afraid, because Max isn't here, but a brilliant 3-2 win over Mansfield for Cambridge United.

And EFL pod is coming tomorrow for you.

And that is about it for today.

Thank you so much, Barry.

Thank you, Robin.

And your little assistant there, who you've been jigging on your lap for parts two and three.

Thank you.

Apologies if, yep,

little Solly has interrupted the podcast.

Will, thank you very much.

Thank you.

I always thought Barry would be the first guest to vomit live on in a live show.

Fair place of Solomon.

Oh, goodness me.

Wonderful.

Wonderful.

Yeah.

He's had the other end, hasn't he?

But not alive on the podcast.

Maybe, maybe, maybe a live show.

Anyway,

that's a meeting for another time.

John, many, many thanks to you.

Well, I can't follow that, can I?

So thanks very much for up.

Thank you all.

All things EFL tomorrow.

You can send us questions over on Instagram.

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Football Weekly is produced by Joel Grove and our executive producer is Danielle Stevens.

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