Josh Was Almost Harry Potter and Working Out with John Mulaney?!

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I'm Josh Peck.

And I'm Ben Soffer.

And we're the good guys.

There's a lot of guys out there.

And we're the good ones.

Mazel morons, welcome back to the good guys podcast.

I'm sitting here with the head of, I don't know, he looks like he could be my brother,

but we're not related.

It's Ben Soffer, everyone.

Yes, we are brothers, Josh. We're heterolife mates.
We are. We are.
We're actually sisters. We're sisters.
I love that. Have you ever read Sisters of the Traveling Pants? No, I've seen the films with the young Blake Lively and an Amber Tamblyn, but yeah.
I said that as if I've read them. I've never read them and I've never seen the movies.
I was just curious if you had. Do you read? Uh, no.
Yeah. What would you read if you read? I feel like you'd read like a sports autobiography.
That's like what you like try to read when like you don't read. Like the last book I read was that Phil Knight.
The Nike one. The Nike book.
Yeah. Like, I'm like, I want to read.
I absolutely want to read. I read Claudia's book.
The last full book before that that I read was The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night. And I think I was 14.
Yeah, no. But it's funny.
On those rare occasions where you can actually get lost in a book, it's an amazing feeling. Like once you're in, but it's kind of for me, like going to the gym, like I don't want it.
And then once I'm there and once I'm in a groove, it's not that bad. But the physical act of getting there is the absolute hardest part.
You're a big reader though, aren't you? I am a big reader. And that's why I'm jealous of like a place where mass transit actually works because it doesn't work in los angeles because like the idea of being able to crack a book for the 25 minute train ride downtown feels like heaven and do audiobooks not do it for you weirdly no and you know me i'm podcast poly over here i crush hour and a half of podcasts a day but audiobookss just, I don't know what it is.
It's like, as soon as it's like a narrative structure, I'm not interested, but when it feels like it's improvised, I'm in. I would say that the last books that I really enjoyed reading were Harry Potter.
My dad literally read the first two to me, and then I read the rest of them. I loved those books so much.
And they're now coming out with a new series. Did you see that? I did, but they're coming out.
You mean a new book series or TV series? TV series. On Max, right? Yes, on Max.
And who is Voldemort? Oh, your boy from Oppenheimer is playing Voldemort. Yeah, I could see that.
He'll crush it.

Killian Murphy is playing Voldemort, and I think it's an amazing casting.

He'll kill it.

I mean, Ralph Fiennes played Voldemort in the movie, and Ralph is one of our great actors.

How do we get you in that?

Who would you play in that?

Neville Papperman?

Yeah, I definitely...

Did you make Neville a Jew?

Isn't it Neville Longbottom?

Yeah.

Did you call him Neville Papperman? Who's Neville Papperman? Who it Neville Longbottom? Yeah. Did you call him Neville Pfefferman?

Who's Neville Papperman?

Who is that?

It's from my Harley.

Get your mind out of the gutter, Ben.

Oh, man.

Neville Longbottom.

All you can think of me as a Nickelodeon person.

You're for sure Hufflepuff, though, right?

I think we're both Hufflepuff. Hufflepuff were the fat, think we're both for the fat fat so smarties right yeah yeah yes what was raven's claw the dumb pretties i don't know what they were raven's claw ravenclaw slytherin was the evil and gryffindor were the heroes yeah Slytherin was like sketch.
Hufflepuff was like Philip Seymour Hoffman and Paul Giamatti. Hufflepuff was just like, just us, nebbish.
Hufflepuff was like all the reject Jews. They're like, the motto for Hufflepuff was like,

that's so funny.

I told you the story of when I was a kid,

I was 12 years old,

isn't already acting.

And they put out the press release

so that they were going to do

a Harry Potter movie.

And at this time,

the world was on fire over Harry Potter.

I think only like the third book

had come out at this time.

And they're like, we're doing a worldwide search for our Harry. And I was like, I have dark hair.
I'm 12. I'm an actor.
I left out the part of I'm morbidly obese. I'm a bad actor.
I'm not British. I left that part out.
But the first part I was like, and I was like, I had really deluded myself to being like, I'm going to be Harry Potter in the movie. I'm going to be fucking Harry Potter.
If only they had a role for Hagrid's son. Shut up, you piece of shit.
See, you can't be Harry Potter, but we do have a fun role for a 300-pound 12-year-old. You're going to play Snape's metabolically challenged nephew.
Hello, Harry. Oi, oi, Harry, I'm starving.
Hello. Oh, my God.
I've been drinking butterbeer all night and I think I'm in a diabetic coma oh my god so good so good so friggin good Harry Potter was great and then before that might be before your time I used to read Goosebumps when I was a kid. Of course, I did.
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I also read the Hardy Boys. The Hardy Boys were about Animorphs? No.
What is that? That was another series about kids who could turn into animals to fight bad things. That sounds pretty chill.
It was pretty chill. Olivia, what were- Did you watch? Did you watch like a- Oh, go again.
Olivia, what was your book series of choice as a young person? I loved Nancy Drew. Oh, cute.
In like third grade, I read every Nancy Drew book. And then I also really liked The Magic Treehouse, which was like these two kids, brother and sister, they'd go up in this treehouse and they'd travel through time all different places all over the world.
It was incredible. Cute.
Yeah. I feel like The Magic Treehouse, or am I just thinking of the magic school bus right on the magic school bus with that freaky miss frizzle with the fire crotch i know she was one big redhead she was the original reba god bless her in other, I got a call yesterday from a friend who said that he was on a long flight and two hours in, a 95-year-old man died.
Confirmed died. And because he died, they just continued the route.
Right. They put the sheet over him.
Yeah. Isn't that crazy? That's pretty fucking traumatic.
That's to me, that's a pretty big, what are you nuts? Like, you're sitting near, there's a dead guy on your flight. Cause this is like a 12 hour flight.
Two hours in, 10 hours with a dead guy. I don't know if it's, what are you nuts is when you land, do they come take the dead guy first or do they let you deboard? Cause in my opinion, I'd be like, listen, he's not going to become alive.
So come get him last. Let me make my way to the carousel, please.
I completely agree. He's not rushed.
He's got all the time in the world. He's good.
He's fine. But now I'm starting to think about it logistically.
Where was he from? because if he was from where they just took off from, they really should have circled back because they're two hours into a 12 hour trip. Right.
If he was going to where he was from or wherever he wanted to be buried, then continue the trip. I guess there was nobody really to ask.
You don't turn back. You got, you know, a 12 hour trip.
It's a big airplane. There's probably 300 people on it.
You go. You don't turn back for one unalived man.
No. Oh, unalived.
You're so TikTok. That's right.
You think I want to get demonetized? No, thank you. Yeah, no.
Yeah, unalived. True.
But we're not. us saying dead is what's going to get us demonetized not us talking about anything else that we talk about not talking about how fanta is a nazi creation hey by the way facts did you watch the new um ellen degeneracy's comedy special on netflix unfortunately yes say say.
I want to start off by saying that I cannot believe that I actually watched something current and can talk about it. Do you know how good that feels? It's amazing.
I think Ellen is really, really funny. You watch old Ellen stuff.
She's hilarious. There is a reason why she became so famous.
I thought was genius. Like the whole world hates you.
They think that you're mean. And so you say, I'm going to go out with a bang.
I'm going to do a comedy special. And if it was so funny, Josh, all that we'd remember Ellen for is being hilarious.
Like if she did like a kick-ass special where I was crying, laughing for 90 minutes, I would have told everybody Ellen's new special is hilarious. It's amazing.
You got to go watch it. Instead, I only watched the first 35 minutes because that's enough time to give a comedy special if it's bad.
And the first 35 minutes, she made a 15 minute joke about windshield wipers. She made a 10 minute joke about an animal.
I forget what kind of animal. And then she said, oh yeah, like I was canceled.
I was mean. And like, maybe she was getting to it.
Maybe the last half hour was a knee slapper. You can't give, you can't wait 30, 35 minutes.
Like I think she should have just come out and said, yeah, I was canceled. I was mean, but I'm funny.
So suck it. And then been funny.
That just think my take. Yeah, I think you're right.
And I also think that the nature of the job, whether it's late night or a daily talk show, is that I think you start getting to a point and it doesn't excuse any bad behavior. It just is interesting.
This idea of like every single day you're jumping out of an airplane, right? Like every single day, you're the one jumping out. And all you can do to everyone around you is go, did you check the shoot? It's good, right? It's good.
I'm going to be good. I'm jumping out at three.
Like, and so I think people get tense and intense. And you know what I mean? Yeah.
And to that point, like if the shoot doesn't work one day out of 3000, like you're not being complimented for the 2,999 days that the shoot worked. Right.
You're just being scolded for the day it didn't. And so it definitely creates a very, very difficult environment.
She also mentioned something that I thought was a bit of a cop out, but it was interesting nonetheless, that she never signed up to be the boss. She is talent.
And because her talent became so big, she became the CEO of Ellen. But her running the show, she just claimed that she didn't know how to do that.
That wasn't something that... She's not a business person.
So she claimed. I thought it was a bit of a cop out.
Yeah. Like you can't become that successful and not be business minded.
You can give up power as long as you don't take the money. That was the other thing.
She was like, she was like, yeah, I didn't have a boss. I'm like, you probably could have asked for a boss.
Like, like if you really wanted one. Nobody wants a that's not a thing i do and her name is my wife true facts hard facts speaking of netflix there's another thing i watched which was freaking fantastic have you heard of the new doc harper and will no i've just strictly been watching gilmore girls well it's right in line with that and okay Okay, cool.
Harper and what? Harper and Will? No, I've just strictly been watching Gilmore Girls. Well, it's right in line with that.
Okay, cool. Harper and what? Harper and Will, Will and Harper.
It's basically Will Ferrell. This woman, Harper, was born a man who was the head writer of Saturday Night Live during the time when Will Ferrell was just coming on the show and during his ascension to one of the greatest ever.
And, you know, there was Molly Shannon was there and then eventually Tina Fey and Tim Meadows and all these great luminaries of the show. So once that was done over the last 10 years, she had transitioned to a woman and she'd written an email to Will and everyone in her life saying, you know, I'm transitioning to be a woman and here's why and here's the things I've been feeling

and I hope that, you know, you'll accept me.

And so she and Will go on a road trip across America, which is something she had done her

whole life to go to like crappy, you know, greasy spoon diners and to sit in Walmart

parking lots, like all the things that she's always loved. But she's done it.
She had done it previously as a man, right? And like going across this country and she's like, this is something I love. But now as someone who's transitioned, I want to see if this thing that I loved still loves me back.
And it's this beautiful trip and it's an opportunity for will to better understand sort of the origin of these feelings and where it came from and what her life is like now and it's very well done loved it is it is it actually the two of the minute huh oh that's amazing on a road trip wow super cool and good for will what a guy love it one of the the funniest ever. Yeah.
I don't even, he's so talented. I don't ever want to meet him.
No, I totally agree with you. He could only let me down.
He could only let me down. Like I hold him to such a high regard.
I've never ever seen anything. Will Ferrell is one of those where like, I look at his face and I'm laughing before he speaks.
It's wild. It's wild the swings that he takes.
It's wild the way his mind works. Yeah.
Talladega nights, just A plus. One of the jokes is in the doc as well as having breakfast with Harper's kids.
And the kids are kind of talking about how it's important that going to different parts of the country. That they're smart and that they just keep their safety in mind.

Because maybe not everyone would be as welcoming as certain parts of where they were.

And Will's like, well, do you guys know that I practice jujitsu twice a month?

So I think we're fine.

And the kids go, really?

We didn't know that.

Can we see something? And he says, I don't like to do my practice on a full stomach so it's just like dude it's just so good what's your favorite will ferrell movie i don't know i mean i think i like the bloopers from anchorman even more than i like the movie and that's saying I love the movie. But that's that's his magnum opus, right? Anchorman's his greatest.
I think so. I think like his most underrated and my favorite movie is Blades of Glory.
So good. I just I just am obsessed.
Like it is just so like the way that he takes on these roles is just like completely genius, which is why I was actually sad. The only movie I didn't like him in was Eurovision.
I just didn't think that the movie was good. I don't even know what that is.
So Eurovision is, do you know what Eurovision is in general or no? Yeah, it's a concert in Europe, right? So it's basically like American Idol meets the Olympics for everybody but the US. Gotcha.
So it's a singing competition outside the US. And I've actually been to Eurovision with Brian Kelly, with Claudia in Israel during Pride Week.
Nuts. Nuts.
And like, I remember thinking to myself, like, this is like a crazy thing. And when I heard that Will Ferrell was making a Eurovision movie, I was like, oh my God, this is fucking genius.
Because it's such like a nerdy, hilarious concept. And he's going to play a singer in Eurovision.
And I saw it and it just I just it just wasn't it. That's probably why you haven't heard of it.
But it is, in fact, a movie. This episode of the Good Guys podcast is brought to you by Carraway.
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Speaking of genius comedians, I last night was at the Montage Laguna Beach. Maybe I should cut out the name of the hotel because i'm about to say something else but we'll leave it in it was really nice and i want to stay there more i was sitting at the montage in laguna beach i was doing a big press event for roku which uh my new show best bite wins comes out october 18th give it a watch i was sort of hosting their advertiser sort of, what would you call it?

Like expedition?

I don't know.

I'm not a student.

Schmooze Fest.

Yeah.

Big schmooze fest.

Two nights.

Beautifully done.

Wonderful advertisers.

I had to sort of host their day of showing off all of their new shows.

I did fine.

Anyway, I walked into the gym.

And who's there? John Mulaney. Wow.
I know, Olivia. Sick.
I know. And, you know, I tried to do the move.
Celebrity to celebrity. Hello, famous.
You know, hello, fellow famous person. You know, I tried to do that eye contact of like, I know you see me, so I see you.
Didn't happen. It didn't happen.
Damn. I gave him the eyes.
I kind of like gave him like, as I walked in, because I was starstruck, so I'm such a fan. Listen, he was lovely, but he was in his workout, and I can totally respect that, because we kind of like, I tried to give him the eyes, and he was not giving me the eyes back.
And I said, all right, I'm going to hit the elliptical. I'll give you the eyes in 20.
Do you think that he thought that you wanted to fuck him? No, I just think he's not my demo, goddammit. How old is this Mullaney? Maybe you just didn't think that you were his type.
Maybe. I don't know.
I just think it's tough. I'm just saying it kind of sounds like you tried to hit on him at the gym no i gave him the celebrity gaze ask diddy we do it all the time hold on how's how is john mulaney i'm telling you i know that he's not in my demo 42 not my demo i i mean nothing to gen x and i've always said that yeah 40 no you you do that's it's true.
It's true. You're definitely very, very popular with the boomers.
Right? And you're very, very popular with Gen Z, Generation Alpha. Gen X.
Actually, no, you're Gen X. No, because.
What's above Gen X? Boomers. No, I think there's something in between.
Baby boomers. I think.
Yeah, by the way, you're not popular in boomers boomers are dead well no it was the greatest generation what are our parents baby you mine is a boomer mine my mom no no the greatest generation fought world war ii then it was the boomers then the baby boomers and then gen x and then i don't think there's something in between no you're forgetting the silent generation yeah in between the greatest generation and baby boomers, but then it's Gen X and then I don't think there's something in between. No, you're forgetting the silent generation in between the greatest generation and baby boomers.
But then it's Gen X, millennial, Gen Z and Gen Alpha. Millennial, millennial, millennial is the literally the one that we are.
That's what we are. Okay.
Yeah. A hundred percent.
No, I'm like millennial. What? We're missing one.
Okay. Yes.
You're big in baby boomers and millennials. Totally exactly right because like you're right gen x didn't have kids that would have watched drake and josh and they were also too old to watch it when i was on it correct correct if they were watching it we gotta call the cops word up well he seemed lovely he was fit as a fiddle and he was taking his workout very seriously and i just wish we'd had some small talk and i've seen him i've seen him he is so unbelievably funny he's brilliant like he's brilliant like i think i think honestly a very underrated underappreciated comic and he took a phone call during his workout and i wanted to eavesdrop, but I didn't.
You should have just like tried to connect to like his Bluetooth or whatever. I think we've got some stories.
No. Yes, we do.
I know that there was something that was really pressing, which the New York Post recently reported that now you can dress up as a sexy Ozepic shot for Halloween. Is anyone surprised? This might have a shot at the best Halloween costume this year.
Online costume emporium Yandy has cashed in on Ozepic weight loss drug craze with a new Halloween costume inspired by fat fighting injections. Everyone's doing it, wrote the costume bazaar on its site, where the company has infamously hawked sultry, if strange, Halloween get-ups inspired by current events like a COVID-19 pandemic-themed hand sanitizer get-up of 2020.
I love it. Yeah.
I'm in. I'm in.
Do they come in kid sizes? Can we dress Max as an Ozempic needle? Love it. I love it too.
Ooh. Ooh.
And if it comes in baby, Shy can be a Manjaro needle. Love it.
And if it comes big, you could be Zep bound. Paige could be semaglutide.
Or she could go as my other favorite medication, Crestor. She could.
I think you should all go as different pharmaceuticals. Love that.
I love it too. I love it.
Are you going to dress up for Halloween? Probably. Yes.
Yes. I love dressing up for Halloween.
I try and remember what I was last year. I would have to go back and look.
Wow. I feel like last year I might've just been like a pimp or something.
It was a lazy last minute costume. That's appropriate.
Olivia, what are you thinking about? I don't have any ideas for this year quite yet because last year I did the one I've wanted to do for like a decade, which was Lindsay and Tobias with my boyfriend. Hi.
So he, from Arrested Development, so he painted himself blue, like really committed to the bit, did the jean shorts and everything and I had a little bit dazzled stop. So I'm not sure yet for this year, but maybe I'll dabble in that Ozempic needle.
Who knows? All that I have to say is that Apple is so amazing. The fact that I could search in my photos the word Halloween and my Halloween costumes in the last 10 years have popped up.
Let me tell you who I've been. Two years ago, Josh, I was Ina Garten.
That one was a really good one. Three years ago, I was, I guess, Vince Vaughn from Average Joe's Gym from Dodgeball.
One year, I was Dr. Phil.
And that year, Claudia was Danielle Bregoli. And I literally got like, I had a bald head put on me.
Let's see. One year, I was DJ Khaled, and Claudia was Claudia was Assad Khaled, his son.
Yeah, we love. I love Halloween.
I love dressing up like it's fun. Like it's just like, I don't know.
I dress up for a living because I'm a semi working actor. So I can't relate because I just feel like I'm going to work.
It's true. It's true.
You get to play a role. It's true.
true you get makeup all the time like us non-actors like it's fun to be somebody different and hilarious it really is i want to go this year with my children i want to go as ben stiller in the world tenenbaums and then dress up my kids as ari and uzi because you know they were all in the red adidas warm-up suits and yes and with like the cute little froze so we might maybe we'll do that for a pick it'll be a good pick it'll be a good pick it'll be a great pick yeah good pick it's great and pay and page can dress up as coach sue sylvester it's the same costume yeah from glee sure hey i see jane lynch i go i want to marry that person I see Jane Lynch. I go, I want to marry that person.

I see Jane Lynch and I say, I think like if I could pick anybody in the world to sit next

to us on this podcast, Jane Lynch is in my Mount Rushmore.

She is just like to me, Will Ferrell.

I see Jane Lynch's face.

I'm cracking up.

I love her.

I'm obsessed.

You're so pure, Ben.

You're really pure.

And we love that for you.

Should we get to our new segment?

How about now?

Thank you. Jane Lynch.
Should we get to our new segment, How About Now? We should. You want to explain it to people, Josh? Basically, I've got an incredibly viral new video trend that I've created called, Are You Having a Good Day? How About Now? Where I do something that completely disrupts your good day.
So we've researched the internet. We found fun facts, fun things to learn about, things that'll certainly change the trajectory of your day, no? Yes.
And we're going to share them in this segment called, How's Your Day? How about now? Hey, you having a good day? Did you know that the universe... Shit.
Wait, I almost got it. I lost it.
lost it oh okay okay hey you having a good day did you know that wearing a tie can reduce blood flow to the brain by 7.5 percent how about now how about now my god terrible yeah and by the way you can feel it too we're strangling ourselves yeah in a recent episode of the Gilmore Girls that I watched, I'm just saying that Father Gilmore, I forget his name already, was wearing a tie, tried to get it off. His wife said, no, no, no, you're not taking off a tie at the dinner table.
Rushed to the hospital, having a heart attack. Wow.
Huge. Huge.
Huge. I like the Ty's look.
I have always hated the way that they feel. And now that makes sense.
Should we do another? You having a good day? Yeah. Did you know that chainsaws were first invented for childbirth? Developed in Scotland in the 18th century to help aid and speed up the process of widening the cartilage and removal of the baby.
It wasn't until the start of the 20th century that we started using chainsaws for wood chopping. How about now? God, women are so much better than us in every way.
Now that is a day ruiner. That was, I don't even know where to go from here i know that's terrible nuts women are leaps and bound stronger more brave better than us and i'm sure like a man invented that like yeah we're just gonna chainsaw her vagina like what are you nuts like if a woman made it it wouldn't have made a chainsaw, Josh.
No. Fucking guys.
Men. With their dumbass ideas.
Dumb men. Idiot.
Men. Idiots.
Idiots. Sorry, Olivia, for us being men.
And I'm sorry. This new segment made me queasy.
I'm going to pass out. Should we do a SpeakPipe? Yeah.
If you want advice, if you have questions for us, go to

SpeakPipe.com slash goodguys, and

we will put your question on the

show, possibly. If it's brief,

keep it brief. Short, short, short, short, short.

Keep it short. We don't care.

We do care, but only a little.

And we will play

SpeakPipe on the podcast.

This first one's from Rebecca.

Hey, Josh and Ben. Rebecca calling in from Florida to share a brief What Are You Nuts moment I had when I was flying down from Jersey to Fort Lauderdale and I fell asleep on the plane.
I woke on the plane uncrossed my legs and kicked the guy's leg next to me because he was manspreading so much that it was in my leg room space on my seat my what are you nuts is manspreading it's awful it's terrible is there ever a time and a place for it? Let me know. I really think no.

You were asleep.

How do you know you weren't manspreading?

Well, her legs were crossed, which, by the way, blood clot anyone?

Falling asleep with your legs crossed?

Can you imagine?

Was your foot asleep when you woke up?

Your circulatory system?

I just imagine her sleeping like this.

In full ego.

It's terrible.

It's terrible.

Here's the thing about man spreading, okay?

That I need you to think about.

I do my best not to.

But if that man was fat, he's not man spreading.

He simply does not have the capability to have his knees touch

because his thighs are so damn big.

And then you add in the fact that there is a package of spaghetti and meatballs in between those two tree trunks. And sometimes for men, it's just difficult.
It just is. So we call it man spreading.
Josh, I don't know what you think about this, but I really just think it's fat spreading. Thoughts? I think we have a bigger problem on our hands, and that's the lack of flexible hips in our male population.
I think you got these men. They got so much tension in these hips.
They're not good lovers. You know that, right? Tight ass hips.
They're probably missionary for 90 seconds and done. Boring.
Not good. So they literally, they can't do a tight cross like I'm famous for because they're tight, tight, tight out there.
So they're already having to spread. And then to your point, there's some anatomy in the middle, but know, but I think you are allowed to say, Hey, Hey buddy, get out of my real estate here.
I can't even put my knee lower than it is right now. Like, wow.
Like people, I have to, this, this, this is a stretch, Josh. I'm stretching right now.
I feel my hip. It feels great.
But like my natural resting zone when I cross my legs is here. It's up.
Wow. You need physical therapy.
I'm down. I need the gentle hands of a strong man.
We spoke about this on the last podcast. No women masseuse for me.
No, no, no. No strength.
You say so. All right.
Our next speak pipes from Anonymous. Hey, Josh and Ben.
Was just listening to your episode, Are We Getting Divorced? You guys were talking about, like, apartments, if you were to ever get divorced from your wives or whatever. And it made me think of a conversation that my husband and I were having on a car ride recently.
And it really, kind of threw me back. And I'd love to hear you guys' takes on this.
He had said that like in the scenario where we're getting burglarized, that he would not save my life if it meant that I would then go on to get remarried and he would be dead. Is that like, what are you nuts or am I nuts? Because I was like, so wait, you wouldn't save me if a burglar came in the house.
So confused. Would love to hear you guys' takes.
Thank you. Bye.
This folks is a great speak pipe. That man, Josh has a lot to learn.
Yep. You have a lot to learn.
There's no reason for you to say anything other than you would save her life in a completely fictitious event that is never happening. Right? What do you have to lose by saying that you would save her, even if you wouldn't? What do you have to lose? What does not save her mean? Are you just, are you not stopping the guy?

Are you going as far to say, in the closet?

Like, are you giving her away?

Why?

Because she's going to find another, I'm guessing this guy is like a seven.

Like, why? Because she's going to find another seven with tight ass hips who makes 90 grand a year once you're in the ground? Get over

yourself, Rick!

Fucking loser.

You can't

replace me. Trust me.

We can.

We'll go find ourselves another Broncos

fan who day drinks.

Can you imagine, Josh,

giving birth or your wife giving birth

to a child? You're holding him up and you say, I'm giving birth or your wife giving birth to a child?

You're holding him up and you say, I'm going to name him Rick.

It's hard.

That's a hard thing.

We should look up. How?

How?

I'm going to name him Rick Peck.

Rick Peck, man.

Let me, worst baby names.

Let's see. Let's look them up.
I can name them off the top of my head morty well you don't have to go jewish right away okay okay marvin marvin's a sick name you are way off basis marvin's no it's not okay ready i'll give you an alphabetical order and this is a compiled list from emma's diary.co.uk appaloosa biggest loser names these are the uh 100 worst baby names okay appaloosa baby boomqueafa okay okay i mean regular names that are bad. Not like Boom Queefa.

Who named their daughter Boom Queefa? Boom Queefa sounds like the Costco family reacting to the first time. They tried a chicken bake and they boom-queefered.
Boom-queefered. Double chocolate chunk, boom-queefered.
Oh, my God i want to talk about real names that are dumb boom quifa america america okay yes these are names. That's like from a couple episodes ago.
Marilona Pepsi. Yes, those are obviously bad names.
But I'm just talking about like run of the mill. Like Rick is a bad name for a baby.
It is. Right.
Trying to think of more. Marvin, Bertha.
I guess like Karen is a tough one now. You can't really do a Karen.
Also baby Karen. Lydia, Deirdre.
Lydia? Like old school, like even my mom's named Barbara. I guess there's Barbara Palvin, but it's not very modern.
Yeah, but Barb's cute. Barb is cute.
It's like Dolores. Doloresores is hot dolores is a hot name now yeah dolores is sick like i would i would say dolores is a bad baby name i like florence the name florence because you can call her flow like i want that's i want fun like my my wife's best friend's daughter's name is carmella which i love the name but i'm from York City, so I call her Carm, and I like that even more.
She's Carmella? Carmella. That's cool.
It's a really good name. That's nice.
Beautiful. Should we do one more? We should.
From Grace Johnston. Hey, y'all.
Big, big moron here from the East Coast with a simple question for you. I've gone my whole life by grace which is my middle name but i started a few years ago at a small startup company and i met someone on my very first day whose name was grace now keep in mind there were only like 15 people working here at the time so i thought to myself this will be extremely fucking annoying and then i introduced myself as callie which is the nickname for my first name so since then that grace has quit and'm wondering, is it extremely fucking weird if I now ask people to call me by grace because I want my fucking name back.
And listen, I already know that it's extremely weird, but I still value your opinion. All right, thanks, y'all.
Please never stop this podcast. It truly gets me through the week.
And I love y'all. Love you, Grace.
Love you, too. I'm thrown off by the fact that she said that twice that she's from the Northeast, but she says y'all.
You never know. Did you catch that? I did.
I'm just saying. Maybe she's from New Hampshire.
Okay. First and foremost, you can have the same name as a coworker.
You fucked up. There can be two Grace.
There can be two Graces. Now, though, that you've gone non-Grace, today you can tell your coworkers, like, there's respect in the workplace for stuff like that you say call me Grace they're gonna call you Grace I don't think it's a problem I think say I'd like you to call me Grace you know it's actually my first name I think it's actually a very self it's a very explainable situation I think so too I'm good with it let Olivia, who's actually in corporate America.
I think that that's totally fair as well. I think just prefacing with like, it's my middle name.
I gave my first name because there was another grace here. Like, there are a couple of Laurens here.
One of them goes by LT. You know, I think there are some ways around it to differentiate.
So I see how she ended up in that situation. But I think it's totally fine.
Just like give people some grace while they adjust to saying grace. Love that.
Do they like did she I'm curious. Did she tell them that that was her first name? What was the name? Rita? Callie, I think.
Callie. Rita is awesome.
Callie. Call cali like is your email now cali at startup that will go bankrupt in three months.com like is that or because if if you need to now change your email that's a can of worms but if it's grace cali which i don't know like hr has first name.
They know what your name is. It's rare.
Is it really changing your email? Is it a bag of dicks? What is it? Is it a bag of worms? Or is it just a call to the IT guy? Anybody that previously had emailed you now won't be able to search you. Your email just becomes like obsolete.
But imagine that fun forwarding email. It's just an inconvenience.
It's just an inconvenience. That's all.
Should we get to our what are you nuts? We absolutely should. Our what are you nuts moment of the week are our gripes, big or small, with people, places, and things,

things that are currently sticking in our craw.

Ben, take it away.

It's two sides to the same coin.

They're both nuts to me.

The first nuts,

they're both revolving around the crock pot, okay?

I don't know if you've cooked in a crock pot, Josh.

I cooked in a crock pot for the first time.

And at first, I was like,

what are you, nuts?

You've never cooked in a crock pot?

Like, this thing is so easy. You press it, 10 hours.
You come back, your meat is cooked, right? Simple. Sure.
Easy. I check on my meat after 10 hours this morning and it tastes like nothing.
When I tell you I put in an unbelievable amount of salt, pepper, red wine, Worcestershire, vegetables, garlic, onions. It's very flavorful things.
I came back, it tasted like nothing. I Google and apparently crock pots, when you slow cook them, all of the flavor can go away because it simply evaporates with the meat when it cooks.
What are you nuts? So I just, yeah, I don't get it. Like, so, so what is, what is the benefit of the crock pot to slow cook meat? But then afterwards I need to add in the flavor.
I don't even know what this, what do you nuts is. It's just very confusing.
It's nuts. That's wild.
That's wild. Cause I see those videos sometimes on, on Instagram where people are like pulling apart this gorgeous 10 hour cooked meat and it just looks like, and you can Josh, I'll show you, I'll take a video for you when I get home, i get home you can pull it apart yeah but it doesn't taste good but it doesn't taste like anything so i had to re-season my meat this morning after it was cooked that's the that's the name of my only fans re-seasoning my meat meat well my what are you nuts is where we record the podcast in la i don't know what what it is.
And Olivia, maybe you can concur. Maybe Olivia, you're a part of it because there must be an agency for models in this freaking building because dude, and first of all, I park on the street because it's $25 to park here and Dear Media doesn't validate.
No big deal.

It's fine, Ben.

You're still not validating your parking?

All it's validating is that I'm cheap, cheap, cheap, cheap, cheap.

So I park on the street and where I like to park, I have to walk by.

There's this beautiful little coffee shop in front of the building.

And I'm telling you, all of these perfect statuesque models are just there sucking down their lattes. Probably the first meal they've had in days.
I'm just kidding. But, you know, and they just look perfect.
And then here comes me, the mongoloid. You know what I'm saying? Big, fat, fat mongoloid walking up into the door.
So I'm like, I put my shoulders i'm i fix my posture and i'm like i'm gonna really give these models a run for their money boom i trip over my shoes i'm like falling over in this like trip that will never end in front of all these models what are you nuts josh you're 37 you have gray hair and you have two kids you don't need to look good for models. You don't need to look good for models.
What are you nuts? Totally. You are a model.
Thanks, babe. These models are nuts.
These models are nuts. You're not nuts.
The modeling industry, it's nuts. I just like, and I've heard this from other actors.
I really do believe that I'm nice looking in my heart of hearts for a normal looking guy. I'm a nice looking normal guy.
And it's funny because I've had auditions where in the description, they would say like looking for traditionally handsome or like, you know, the love interest. And then you walk into a room of guys who are movie star good looking or print good looking.
And you realize you're not cute. When you see that beautiful bone structure that was just born in a faraway place like Iowa.
You know what I mean? You just go, yeah, you got the goods. It's just different.
It's different. I thought i was good looking until i met craig conover sitting next to him he's the most handsome man i've ever seen in my life beautiful it's unbelievable it's unbelievable and speaking of not validating another very handsome fellow michael bostic gorgeous gorgeous man shout out michael we love you.
Oh, and folks, that is our show.

If you don't rate us five stars, what are you nuts? Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts,

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