Elmo Said WHAT?

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good guys.

Whoa.

Mazamarans, welcome back to the Good Guys Podcast.

I'm sitting here with the head of Elmo's crisis team.

It's Ben Coffin.

Oh, my God.

God, what the hell was that?

Oh, man.

What was the password?

Elmo loves Hitler?

Tell people what happened.

Elmo went on an anti-Semitic tirade.

He wrote Kill the Jews.

He wrote a bunch of weird crap that he clearly doesn't think.

Sesame Street loves all people.

They then wrote a weird apology.

Elmo was hacked.

Elmo wouldn't do this.

I love that they counted in Elmo's voice.

Like, just write like this account was hacked.

It doesn't need to be, Elmo said it's hacked.

Elmo would never.

By the way, am I Yodo?

Well, let's.

So Elmo's Twitter.

You do a good Elmo.

We should do Elmo.

Let's do an episode where, you know, sometimes Elmo needs to learn a lesson on Sesame Street.

So let's do an episode.

You're on Sesame Street.

Elmo messed up.

And Elmo needs to learn a lesson about these anti-Semitic tweets.

Elmo, why was your password 123?

Why was your password one two three?

I told you, Elmo, that you needed to make your password stronger.

Elmo made a mistake.

He was hanging out with his friend, Mr.

Kanye, and Mr.

Kanye asked to borrow his phone while he was logged in.

And so you think that Mr.

Kanye, you're saying you had a stronger password.

Mr.

Kanye changed it to 123, logged logged in.

And then all of a sudden, Mr.

Kanye is the one who wrote, fuck the Jews.

Is that right, Mr.

Elmo?

Allegedly, Mr.

Kanye was paying me a cut from Donda 3, to which I said, Mr.

Kanye, I will go back to watch the throne.

That seems to be when things were working better.

But Mr.

Kanye said, no, my audience loves gospel.

And I said, agree to disagree.

You sound like Elmo from the streets.

Anyway,

I don't know why people got so upset.

I love Jewish people.

My friend Oscar the Grouch, I think, is Jewish because

he's very frugal and very mean.

Shit.

Oscar's very cheap, like a lot of Jews I know.

Shit, damn it.

No, Elmo.

No.

I mean,

I got sold to fake chain on 47th Street by Moses and Julian.

And I'm feeling a little angry.

He's too good.

Oh my God, that is too good.

That is too good.

So yeah, Elmo.

I hope you learned your lesson, even though it sounds like you didn't learn your lesson.

You were really the one that was tweeting the the whole time.

I just really wanted to know what happened to my friend Jeffrey Epstein.

Because three minutes were removed from that videotape and I want to know where they were.

You got me, Elmo.

I don't know.

We don't know.

Let's transition off this touchy subject to the Epstein tape because.

Everyone's like, three minutes were removed from the video.

And I want to be like, yeah, ever heard of a trailer?

Like, yeah, okay.

There were previews before it.

Yeah.

I, I, all I know is I don't know enough.

I just love it.

It seems weird.

This all seems sketchy.

And there are just too many powerful people involved for it to just be a big nothing.

That's all.

That's what I think.

I just love the one thing that unites both parties is covering up the Jeffrey Epstein tapes, which is so, which, which goes to show you that like the 1% of the 1% of the 1% of the 1% are the root of all evil.

And everybody else is just like pretending to push allegiances towards one evil versus another evil.

And it's like, if you can be a part of a pedophilia ring, you're evil.

Sorry, that's not like a, it's not a Democrat, Republican, if you're, you're, it's not even a U.S.

thing.

If you were a part of a pedophilia ring, you're

you're a bad guy.

You're a bad guy.

So I don't know why we're,

I really hope that they really don't exist.

I, I, I'm sure that they do, but like, I don't know why you would cover these people up.

Like, it just, it just doesn't, just doesn't, I, it's just not right.

I get why people are angry.

I'm angry.

I want to know.

It's wild.

It just, yeah, we're living in a constructed matrix reality and there are just like people pulling the levers.

And unfortunately, I think people are just like.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

But like, I really got to worry about paying for my kids' after school program next month.

And they're just banking on the idea that people will forget because life will get busy.

People will forget because life gets busy.

That's just the way that this works.

Like the only reason that this is back is because they are talking about it.

The second that they stop talking about it again, it will eventually disappear into nothing.

We will never end up learning anything.

The exact same thing will happen.

with didn't didn't they say that they were like releasing like stuff on jfk like they were saying that they were going to release like a bunch of stuff and all of a sudden unless all these conspiracy theories are just nothing, but I'm a big conspiracy theorist and I think that conspiracy theories are real.

I don't think that they're conspiracy theories.

So it can't, not everything could just be nothing.

I don't know.

I tend to not believe in conspiracy theories just because most of the people believe in them aren't you, Ben, like respectable, good people with good lives and good jobs.

And they live in a basement.

But there's like a difference between a conspiracy theory and like thinking that there was some foul play with JFK.

I don't think that's like a conspiracy theory i think that's i think that's i think that's i think it's pretty cut and dry but people would call that a conspiracy theory right so i don't know i don't know josh it's wild

it's wild so i want no part of it i want to go to home goods i want no part of it either by the way speaking of home goods you know where i went recently josh that is almost as good as home goods where marshalls oh please

I used to go to Marshalls.

There was Marshalls on Long Island.

My mom would take me to.

She's from Jericho.

We would go to the Marshalls in Jericho.

And I would just rummage through.

They would have like, they were probably fake, like swing man basketball jerseys.

I remember finding like a Walt Ferris.

Nothing fake at Marshalls, babe.

I remember finding a Walt Frazier jersey for like 11 bucks, begging my mom to buy it for me.

And she did.

And I would buy like a bunch of jerseys there.

But in my head, it was just like discounted clothes.

Yes.

I went back.

This is TJ Maxx.

This is home goods.

Their home section, beautiful pots, pans.

I'm always looking for plates for Fork of July.

I'm looking for Pargi plates.

They got Pargi plates.

What is Pargy?

Pargy is gorgeous.

It's a Gargy Pargy, gorgeous.

It just went from gorgeous to Gargy.

Gargy runs Pargy.

So it's really just gorgeous.

Oh, I hate that.

Oh, my God.

Oh, I was hoping for so much more.

No, no,

that's it.

That's it.

Listen, we're no better.

Definitely not.

I, yeah, man, Marshalls growing up, before I would go back to school, it'd be like, come on, let's go get a piece of a few pieces of clothing for your school year.

And it would be, you know, FUBU.

Yeah.

The acronym stands for For Us, Buy Us.

And people assume that that's just black people, but it's not.

It's also heavyset Jewish teens because I was zooted head to toe in Fubu and it just it it it hugged my my rolls and my curves so good and to the great Damon John who is a friend who will come on the pod one day I hope thank you sir because maybe you didn't intend or maybe you did intend but I felt completely seen in my Ruben-esque 13 year old body is he a Chrissy DiStefano friend or is he a friend friend?

Is he a Pete Davidson?

I just want to know.

Are you are you guys like because Damon John, that's a powerful friend, my man.

That's a powerful friend.

I've been in his book.

He wrote about me in his book.

We've been to dinner.

I'd say that you're friends.

I don't think we are, but

I think.

I appreciate you.

I think if I reach out to his people who I talk to here and there, we have a lovely working kind of relationship.

I've mentioned him doing the podcast before.

We got to start a plus-size clothing line with him.

He knows it.

Let's make something for the youth are there still plus size youth with ozempic or it's not a thing anymore

olivia

i don't think so i i mean i i don't think kids are allowed to take ozempic like can you take it before 16?

you can i'm pretty sure i'm pretty sure the kids are getting jabbed if you're like an overweight young teen i think you're getting jabbed these days wow what a game i just wonder i just wonder well like will childhood it's it's a crazy thought.

And not everybody has access to these drugs.

So, of course, you still have some level of childhood obesity, but it's just like, how much will that change?

I still think we started.

It's not like DXL is going out of business tomorrow because of Ozempic.

Sure.

Okay.

Also, people wear with a badge of honor.

There are plenty of people that are super fat that wear it proudly.

I wear it proudly.

I wear it proudly.

So I don't know.

I think we started to do with Damon John.

We should do every month, we should do a themed month devoted to people who are big and proud.

Like,

this, you know, February is Jewish teen month.

And then, you know, March is American Samoa month.

Yeah.

I love it.

Big and proud from all over.

April is Alabama month.

What was that video?

There was like a kid.

I think he might have been from the Philippines.

He was probably eight.

Sumo Saturdays.

Overweight and smoking a cigarette.

Do you know the video that I'm talking about?

That like a year old that would rip SIGs?

Yes.

Oh,

maybe I do.

Yeah.

I'm proud of him.

We get the Rizzler.

It's Rizzler Appreciation.

Yes.

Right.

We get there's the new Rizzler.

You know, Tony Cash.

He's not fat, but he's smooth as silk.

Okay.

So

our ambassadors are the Rizzler.

Jack Black.

The Rizzler.

Jack Black.

Tim Dillon.

John Goodman lost too much weight.

You saw?

He doesn't qualify anymore.

He's a stick.

And maybe a hologram of me in 2002.

And I'm like, I'm the store greeter, but it's a hologram.

It's like a hologram of you in 25.

A hologram of you in 2002.

Yeah.

And a hologram of me in 2026.

And I inevitably shoot back up.

Do you think that's ever possible?

No.

No.

And also i want to keep going through our ambassadors for our xl line with damon john but then i want to go into josh i'm on i'm on day five of creating and i'm cruising and you're working it finally clicked yes it never clicked for me i'm cruising let's just finish up this conversation we got we got the riz we got a hologram at you we got to get a hologram at john candy we just have to lena dunham for our ladies department yeah we're getting lena dunham oh my god

you're gonna have to listen hard to this app we're getting this dangerous no but like she looks amazing and like shout out to her like i just fine okay you threw her out there fine no lena dunham she's not an ambassador she's not welcome she's too fit who is a lot lizzo lizzo lizzo's fit too yeah she's she's like fit for she's big fit she still could rep our line proudly okay okay you could still rep our line proudly shout out yeah because we're for we're for all bodies thick and thick and small

but just not we're we're for thick and small but just not tall

no tall

short fat kings and queens thick and all but not tall

yeah that's true big and tall how about just big

all right so bring damon john on the pod i think that there's something here this is direct to consumer business we're going to power it with shopify 44 inch waste or more.

And I think that, I think that this is it, Josh.

This episode of the Good Guys Podcast is brought to you by our friends at Shopify.

Folks, do you have a movement that you're trying to start?

And I'm not talking about a foul movement.

I'm talking about a community-driven, cause-driven project.

You want to rally the troops?

Maybe it's like Feed the Streets that Josh is always doing because he's a better person than me.

Are you looking to start a charity?

Are you looking to accept donations?

Josh, let's think about this okay because we can do this all on more on shopify but let's think about this we're starting a charity what are we starting okay we are starting the joshi and benny big boys foundation okay yeah these are this is for thick boys of any class uh economic class but who need better access to bigger pants bigger clothes i'm talking and we we go from like big boys to tarps okay i'm saying we have categories right we have like chubby kids all the way to you getting your own tlc show.

There was the Boys and Girls Club.

Now there's the Big Boys Club.

It's the Benny and Joshi Big Boys Club.

Here's what you can expect.

Okay.

You're going to go to Benny and Joshie BigBoys Club.com, which is, of course, powered by Sean.

501,

is that right?

I think so.

First, we're going to ask for your waist size.

Okay.

So you're going to take it.

You're going to take out the measuring tape.

You're going to tell us.

And I'm letting you know if you wear a size 42 pants and under, not accepted.

We're looking at 42 and above.

Okay.

And there is no max.

We're fully inclusive.

You have a size 80 and you're one step closer to God.

This is the place for you.

We want an A1C in the double digits.

You're going to go.

You're going to give us your waist size and then you're going to pick for materials, cotton, jeans.

And then we even have a service where we'll put the clothes on you if you upload a photo.

Fine magic allows you to see yourself in these clothes.

It is fantastic.

So if you want to start a cause-driven movement us, you're going to go to shopify.com slash good guys today because I'm telling you, it's never been easier.

You can collect donations.

You can collect pant sizes, whatever you want.

Do it today.

Yeah, top to bottom.

It's got you covered, Shopify.

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What are you nuts?

Into what are you nuts for not trying Chili Pad?

Let me talk to you about my health journey.

Okay, because not that you asked, but I've made tremendous strides.

Okay, tremendous.

First of all, I found out, folks, if I told you to take turmeric, this is like a class action waiting to happen.

If I told you to take turmeric, but I never told you that you needed activated, I think it's like pepper or something, it doesn't work.

It doesn't work.

Curcumin and

spioprin.

Correct.

So I've now switched to one tab that has both at the minute: the turmeric and the curcumin.

That's what you need to buy because otherwise you're buying turmeric and you're peeing it right out.

It doesn't work.

It does, it's going to give you hives.

Okay.

So that's on the supplement journey.

Besides that, I'm taking our beautiful sponsor, Momentasis Creatine.

And let me tell you, Josh, I'm on day five.

I'm taking the recommended dose for you and Terry Dubrow.

Okay.

The five milligrams.

Josh, I take it with my EG1.

I shake it.

I drink it.

All of a sudden, my muscles are like, hey, Ben, you want to go fucking do something?

And I'm like, yeah, muscles, I do.

I've gone to the gym four days in a row.

Wow.

Good for you.

Good.

Four days in a row.

Four days in a row.

We're lifting lightly.

We're doing cardio.

We're doing the bike.

We're here, Josh.

We're cold plunging and I'm back in a great groove.

And really, I swear, if you're having trouble getting back in a groove, take creatine.

Your muscles, my muscles, they screamed at me.

Is that what happens to you?

I take it and they're like, hey, dude, work us.

Work us.

We want to work.

It's a great thing.

I do like Momentous.

I use it too.

I think the creatine is great.

Sometimes I do a little scoop and a half.

I'm nuts.

like looking a little bloated in the face but it's solid stuff and i don't know i work out i try to work out i honestly i would work out six days a week without fail if i didn't sometimes have kids in life come up.

And it's my great pleasure.

It is the game changer of all things.

It makes me feel better, but it also makes this kepi feel better.

This is a bad neighborhood when I'm not working out.

But when I am working out, it's like I'm power washing.

I'm getting the gum off the streets, the tar, the disgusting rubbish.

So, you know, Terry Dubro said, if I could choose you to stop smoking or to work out, I would say smoke while you work out.

He did say that.

and I loved him for that because I'm thinking of picking back up cigarettes.

And by picking back up, I mean I never smoked, but like, I just haven't had a cigarette in far too long.

It's been at least a year.

I just need one.

Oh, that's unacceptable.

I need one.

Like, they're just, they're so gorgeous.

Let's make that with Damon John, too, the gym cigarette.

What do you think?

Yeah, Jim Cig.

It's a pre-workout cigarette.

Oh, I love it.

I love it.

There's creatine in it.

You're smoking your creatine.

You're smoking pre-workout.

You're blowing it on your Nautilus machine, and then you're getting a personal record.

Do you think that you can make either a creatine-based Zin product where you just throw it in and it starts doing all the things that creatine does, or a creatine-based fake pen?

I think they're both terrible ideas.

What about you?

You're on the elliptical, all of a sudden,

boom,

yeah,

you're you're doing the skis, you're doing the skis.

You're doing the skis.

Yes.

He doesn't see it.

Okay.

He doesn't see it.

Look, the truth is, is that I follow a lot of TikTok steroid accounts because I like to.

It's like when

that's not a walking red flag, if I've ever heard one,

I follow a lot of TikTok steroid accounts.

Oh my God.

I'm like, what's your stack, bro?

It's like when people go to Yelp before to see what they serve at the restaurant, I'm like, I know I'm going to land there in the next two to five years.

So, yeah, I want to know exactly where the hair is going to grow.

It's going to be that, but yeah, creatine, Josh, is it?

What else should I take?

What are you taking?

I don't take much.

I think like, and I don't even take creatine that much.

My whole goal in life.

Oh, you don't take, you don't take it every day?

I thought you took it every day.

No, I'd cycle on and off.

Sometimes I'll take it five days straight, then I'll take the weekend off.

I don't want to be on anything.

I'm on my cholesterol medicine medicine for life.

That I have no problem.

I don't believe it has deleterious effects.

So I'm on that.

I stopped taking my antidepressant after three years.

I feel okay.

When did you stop?

You haven't noticed.

Like two months ago.

No, I haven't.

What she is, you didn't eat it.

Mozatov.

Congrats.

You don't know that either.

Stop.

You and your blank can stay.

I see it.

I would see it, Josh.

I would see it if you were in a dark place.

I would see it.

You're good.

I hide it.

I hide it deep.

Man.

You're good.

No, I like that.

Yeah, you're good.

Don't.

You're going to do this to Ruby.

He's going to be like, Dad, I'm having a rough time.

Ruby, you're good.

You're gorgeous.

You're good.

Just brush yourself off.

You're fine.

You're like a father from the 50s.

You're good.

Dad, I'm crying out for help.

You're good.

Dad, I'm having an affair with my teacher.

You're good.

Is she hot?

He's lovely.

All right, fine.

Now Now it's time.

It's time.

We had a talk.

Get out of my house.

Piece of shit.

You're a piece of shit.

It's funny.

Yeah.

You know, I think it's interesting because people.

Why did you go off it?

Well, maybe the better question is, why did I go on it?

Well, I think that you...

Okay, let's.

Yeah.

Why did you go on it?

So when did you go on it?

It's very interesting.

I went on it three months before Shai was born.

So that would be like June 2022.

And I'll never forget I had been traveling a lot.

I was doing Oppenheimer and then I was doing a lot of college gigs.

And I was just like traveling, working.

It was a lot.

I knew Shai was coming.

And this is, this is a weird story.

I woke up one morning and it was like 5 a.m.

because I had to get on a flight back home.

And I remember.

It was when Dave Chappelle had been attacked on stage by that guy who ran on stage at the Hollywood Bowl.

Yes.

And he was like a young guy in his early 20s.

And luckily, security intercepted and beat the crap out of him.

And, you know, he was taken away.

And I remember I just opened my phone to try to like wake up because I had this early flight.

And I saw what had happened.

And then I saw a picture of this kid.

And his arm was twisted in this horrible way.

And

I started to cry.

And I, I just started welling up because it was, and all I could think was, where was was this kid's parents?

Like I had this wave of fatherly, like, oh, if only I could have like helped this kid to not make this horrible decision.

And I was like, something's off with Joshi.

And then

I was driving a couple of days later.

And it was one of those moments where you hear it on the radio.

Like a commercial came on the radio saying, are you burned out?

Do you have?

feelings of sadness.

Do you feel completely overwhelmed?

And I was like, yes.

And

I had always flirted with taking something.

Had you ever been on them before or never?

Never.

First time.

First time.

Okay.

I didn't know.

You didn't tell me this.

Well, I had always flirted with the idea because I had a very typical,

you know,

just, you know, you hear a lot about it in 12 steps.

You hear about it from a lot of artists of just like that hole in the soul.

I always joke around.

when I qualify at a 12-step meeting, I'll be like, at eight, nine years old, I was walking around thinking differently, feeling too deeply, contemplating life in the abyss.

And if you had seen me at eight or nine years old, you would have said, get that kid a drink.

Cause he needs to chill the fuck out.

Yeah.

So fast forward,

I

luckily get sober.

I have all these tools that I can use.

therapy and working out and working on myself and all these like really pragmatic things that I can do.

And I did, and I, and I had great results, but I just always had this thing and it seemed to be coming to a head.

So I started taking the medicine and I felt good.

And I remember like, it was like one or two weeks after Shai was born.

And I said to Paige, I'm like, should I not take this anymore?

Like, I can't really tell.

And she was like, take it.

She's like, it's helping.

Yeah.

Okay.

All right.

If you see it.

So.

I did it for three years.

And then I just kind of felt like it was,

I wasn't getting the same effect.

And, you know, it's not uncommon where sometimes in that three to five year window, something you've taken that's been successful, sometimes you have to up a dose, sometimes you have to change the medicine.

So I said, let me just try without.

And I did.

And I was on a super low dose.

So it was safe to get off of it.

And I feel okay.

I mean, I miss it a little.

It was fun.

He's a fun little friend.

Okay.

All right.

Well, one, with the way that you joke about these meds and have forever, I honestly always thought that you were on it.

I had no idea.

So, okay.

so went on it in 2022, just went off it.

Withdrawal of anything is very hard.

So the fact that you're doing it is amazing.

It was a very, it's a very light one, and I was on the lowest dose.

So it wasn't

bad.

It was just like a little pick-me-up.

Like, like, okay, look, I,

not that you needed this for me, but like, I support anybody wanting to take anything.

I think that it is

sometimes

you need help getting over the hump for things.

And nobody can know what's going on inside of somebody else's head.

Everybody's head is different.

So I hate people that are like judgmental over meds.

So I'm happy that you were on it.

I'm happy that you're off it.

I hope that you can stay off it if that's what's right.

And I hope you go back on it if that's what's right.

Like, you know, just give me all the answers.

Yeah, that's it.

And then if you wait for a while, that's okay.

If you take it tomorrow, call me and I say, do it.

I hope you do what's right for you.

I really do.

If you want to be Pickett Pfizer, I'm with you.

I'll go buy some plywood.

I'm a chameleon.

I'm ready.

Whatever you need me to do.

This episode of the Good Guys Podcast is brought to you by our friends at Home Chef.

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But if Paige said that she like noticed something, I mean, that's something.

I don't know.

Okay.

I'll tell you what's really interesting.

And I don't think you suffer from this.

And I think that's a good thing.

I hurt my back bad a couple years ago and I had to go to like physical therapy.

And the doctor prescribed me some pain medicine because it was like keeping me up at night.

It really stunk.

And so I went to this physical therapist, this doctor, and he's amazing, right?

And I had seen him before for other stuff.

And I'm just like, you know, when you're just so like, you know, when you get back pain, it takes your breath away.

Yes, of course.

So he's like trying to work me out and do this.

And by the way, Icy Hot doesn't do it.

It does nothing.

Continue.

It doesn't.

It doesn't.

And he's trying to work me out.

And I'm just like.

I can't breathe.

It's so painful.

And he goes, the doctor give you pain medicine.

And I said, yeah, but I don't want to take it.

And he was like, can I make a suggestion?

He was like, take it for three days.

He's like, because you are so tight and tense that until your body relaxes for a second, you're not going to start healing.

He's like, that's my suggestion.

And I did.

And he was right.

And that was kind of my experiment over the last couple of years is because you live in your own brain.

You live in your mind and you think, well, this is just the way it is.

And sometimes having a new view of what it it can actually be something else uh is very interesting

and again not to pretend to know what you were going through but and i think i've told the story i had surgery in 2011 chi area malformation big stargarlier spine surgery i had i had spine surgery essentially they didn't touch my brain it was that the top of my spinal cord was protruding on the base of my skull and it was creating spinal fluid.

I was fainting for like four months.

I had to like withdraw from school for a semester.

And it left me, the worst thing that it left me with was a horrific anxiety disorder to the point that if I left bed, I thought I was going to faint.

And this happened for like a year.

That if I stood up, I would be in the shower, like I'd tilt my head back.

And you know, like when you tilt your head back, sometimes like it's like a little, you get like a little starry or like a little faint, but it's nothing, sure.

Right.

That's just like normal life.

I would like to tilt my head back.

I'd feel it and I would have a complete panic attack attack and shut down.

And somehow, some way I told myself, I'm like, look, you've been cleared.

You are healthy.

You are not going to die.

The worst thing that's going to happen to you is that you're going to wake up on the floor.

And somehow, I'm not saying that everybody can do this.

Somehow, I tricked my brain into not being anxious anymore.

And I've used that for the last 13 years.

Whenever I get anxious about anything, because life is anxiety ridden.

If you want to go there, even the smallest thing, like being on TikTok and doom scrolling, you can become unbelievably nervous and depressed and scared.

And the second that you just say to your brain, I say to my brain, Ben, shut the fuck up.

This isn't real.

Go outside, put down your phone, think about something else, distract yourself.

distract yourself from whatever's going on.

I'm at least able to distract myself.

And the second that I distract myself for long enough, I've forgotten about it.

I'm not saying that it's the same thing with meds, but I do think that the meds sort of take you, it's it takes you out of that place to your point so that you can see what it's like being out of that place.

And then hopefully, you've just forgotten all about that place and it's gone, right?

But

it's,

I don't know.

But could you imagine if you had to wear a cutesy little helmet because of your fainting spells?

So you just had to wear like one of those soft helmets everywhere you went.

Yeah, that would be Balenciaga.

Could you imagine if Balenciaga?

I can't beat the way you're saying that.

Balenci.

That's Balenciaga.

Oh, and it's Munjaro, not Munjaro.

No, but I'm positive.

It's not Balencia.

Balenciaga.

Balenciaga?

What the fuck?

I'm sorry I didn't grow up on the Upper East Side, man.

Balenciaga.

All right, Rutho, drive out languid, man.

Let's an out.

Balenciaga.

Balenciaga.

Man,

never been smacked so hard by all this high-priced items.

I'm going to Second Avenue Dolly for a Matzo Ballin Siaga soup.

A Matzo Balin.

That's hot.

Can you imagine, though, a Balenciaga disability helmet?

Imagine a Balenciaga.

Right?

A Gucci, like a Gucci helmet.

Not a Gucci.

I almost say, like, am I living in an alternative universe where he doesn't know how to say anything?

Oh my God.

I'm sorry.

I love my Gucci hat.

Should we get to some stories?

Gookie.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Story it up.

I think that would be hot.

I do think that would be hot.

We need like something to announce stories.

Like, sisters, it's a story time.

Benny and Joshi going over stories.

It's Benny and Joshi going over stories.

And then it's like a ticket.

You were in my friend.

You were in in my friend.

You were in my friend.

That was it.

Yeah.

Benny and Joshi reading the stories.

Yeah.

Or we could just steal it.

We could tell them NBC.

Benny and Joshi reading stories.

Reading stories.

Stories.

Reading stories.

Today on the news, we have Epstein found dead again.

We have Epstein.

Man, do we wish his last name was Smith?

That would be so much better.

Well, did you hear about this Coplay kiss cam?

Zeroes in on mortified tech CEO and alleged HR chief?

So, for anyone who doesn't know, at this massive Coplay concert, they did like an audience cam, and there was this, you know, couple in their 40s or 50s hugging, cuddling, and they zoom in on them.

And the moment they go on the big screen, they immediately freak out and they like hide their faces.

And Chris Martin said something to the effect of like, wow, hope you're not having an affair.

But are they?

Allegedly, maybe they are.

No, they are.

Apparently, it's the CEO and the head of the HR, as he said, and they're having an affair.

And all that I have to say is, if he like, obviously, if you immediately duck out of camera, Josh, people are going to post that, right?

But if they had just like played it cool, nobody would ever be like videoing a kiss scam at a Cold Play concert and putting it online.

They played themselves, no?

You're so right, but also hilarious that Coldplay has a kiss cam.

Totally.

What is this?

A Mets game?

Yeah, it's so dumb.

That's so weird.

Even though when I see Coldplay concerts on TikTok, I'm like, damn, I've been there.

They're amazing.

Wow.

I was in like an EDM just like phase last night, like an EDM doom scroll.

And I sent you a bunch of a couple of its.

I just, I need to feel that.

That energy in my veins.

That's my drug of choice, Josh.

EDM.

Yeah, I know.

A little Alesso.

And what made me think of that is the sky full of stars remix with Coldplay.

Yeah.

Chef's Kiss.

Chef's Kiss.

But those Cold Play concerts, they look unbelievable.

Has Coldplay done the Sphere?

I don't know.

I'm too busy watching clips of the Backstreet Boys at the Sphere.

Are you watching this?

I haven't seen, no.

What?

Amazing.

Are they amazing?

You're too young, Olivia.

Have you?

I mean, you're even younger.

I haven't seen the Backstreet Boys playing at the Sphere, but I'm familiar with them, of course.

Oh my God.

It looks unbelievable.

Yeah, no, they're not in my, they're not in my algorithm right now.

They're not.

They're not.

Oh, I'm dying to go.

I'm so jealous.

I want to go so bad, James.

By the way, go.

Go.

Why?

It's a 45-minute flight.

Go.

I'll get you tickets.

I have three children.

You'll be back.

You'll literally be back that afternoon.

Can you imagine me explaining to people, like, oh, Josh, you finally got away a little.

Yeah, well, the boys were at the sphere.

They'd be like, marry a man, Josh.

Just stop stringing brains along.

Bring Max.

Bring Max.

Put on the cans.

Bring Max.

We love it.

We do listen.

We do.

We listen.

Love that.

This episode of the Good Guys Podcast is brought to you by our friends at Applebee's.

Folks, Applebee's was it when I was growing up.

I am telling you, we would head to our local mall, find that gorgeous Applebee's, and just get such a beautiful feast.

We're talking talking the spinach artichoke dip.

I love their boneless wings.

I would go, picture this.

It's the perfect, perfect suburban evening.

You hop into your, I don't know, you hop into your pickup truck.

You pick up a couple of friends.

You head to the local mall.

You're seeing a gorgeous movie.

Okay, but before you stop at the bees, because the bees is it.

The bees is a scene.

You're getting a beautiful appetizer.

You're getting two entrees.

And what?

They're only charging you 25 bucks because right now, applebee's iconic two for 25 deal is back featuring their new chicken parmesan fettuccine and new big banging burger god what a deal that is two entrees one app $25 you absolutely can't beat that and you also can't beat the fact that Applebee's is just a family-friendly all-american establishment i love it me and claudia will go i'm so excited to bring ruby you go there and it's just it's nostalgic it's the bees you want to take you want to make memories at the bees i have such fond memories of the bees when I was growing up.

For whatever reason, I loved a New Jersey bees.

They just hit better.

That East Coast Jersey bees hit good.

And I'm telling you, I can't wait to do it with my kids.

Me and Claudia love the bees.

We go all the time.

We're absolute at beeshead.

Is that a thing?

Beeswax?

I wonder what the bees people call each other, but we absolutely love the bees.

And Applebees is also the perfect one-stop shop to catch a game.

I don't know, you want to watch a baseball game.

You want to watch a football game.

You're going there.

You want some brew skis, but you also want some delicious food at a great price.

You can enjoy a great meal, a great meal at Applebee's.

And today you can take advantage of their iconic 2 for 25 deal because it is back.

That is two entrees, one appetizer featuring their new chicken parm fettuccine and new Big Bang and burger.

Two entrees and one appetizer for $25.

In this economy, in this economy, you're wetting you nuts for not going and getting that.

Also, I'm telling you, I didn't know this, so I'm sure that you didn't know this either.

If you don't have time to make it to the bees, you can order the bees in.

I ordered in the bees.

Oh my God, it was just as delicious.

And I got to take advantage of the deal when I ordered in.

It was absolutely fantastic.

But if you have the time, you go to the bees, you go to the mall, you go to the freestanding one, you get that big, gorgeous soda, gorgeous.

Free refills, unbelievable.

You then go into, I would personally go into a spinach artichoke dip.

That's just an iconic, iconic, iconic appetizer.

And then maybe you get a side of mac and cheese.

You're getting the chicken parm fettuccine.

You're getting a gorgeous Big Bang and burger.

And you're saying, how easy is that?

I can't believe I haven't been to Applebee's sooner.

It is absolutely amazing.

You gotta go.

Two for 25 deal is back, baby, featuring their new chicken parm fettuccine and the new Big Bang and burger while supplies last.

Two entrees, one appetizer, $25.

In this economy, what are you nuts?

You gotta go.

Well, did you know Brianna Chicken Fry has surprising reaction to Zach Bryan revealing her techs?

The BFF's co-host laughed and called her ex-boyfriend Effing Effing Stupid on the latest podcast episode for sharing screenshots of her past texts earlier this week.

He honestly verified everything that I've said.

The Barcelon sports personality, who worried Brian had posted her nude photos, said on Wednesday, I don't know what he was trying to do by that.

I guess, yeah, the message Brian uploaded and deleted via Instagram stories on Monday notably included a post-breakup text from Brianna after he allegedly fled the state instead of going to rehab.

The 26-year-old claimed that the country singer berated her and sent awful stuff ahead of her lengthy response.

I've only met one of them and Brianna chicken fry is lovely and it seems like she was in a terribly toxic relationship.

I don't know Zach Bryant, but it has been mentioned by many a woman that he was an incredibly toxic partner.

So I have to side with the chicken.

Big chick.

We love that chicken fry.

She is really fab, isn't she?

She's cool.

She's nice.

She's funny.

She's great.

She's great.

And that Zach Bryan, he hasn't invited me to a concert.

I have no allegiance.

Bianna, he was too busy.

Oh, you have Jake Shane on?

Why?

What do I mean?

I mean, we love Jake Shane, but this is Benny and Joshi.

Do you understand the pipes that we have?

I don't know any of your songs, but if I did, I could sing along.

Josh has an amazing voice.

I know your songs, and I'm not even a fan.

I went, I drove home for a funeral.

I did something like that shit.

I hit a chicken crossing the road.

I told him, go to the other side before you get bored.

Yeah, it's something like that, right?

Everything changed and it feels kind of weird.

Like, you know?

I went off my antidepressant.

I'm not taking home bution anymore.

And I broke up with Brianna chicken and fucking fried.

But yeah, that's basically it.

Right?

I know.

I love music.

I think so.

And somehow he feels Matt MetLife.

It's crazy.

You know who else feels Matt Life?

Josh.

I don't know if I can really like Claudia.

Said that she'd go with me.

She said that she'd go.

August 10th at MetLife.

Better than Meatloaf.

August 10th at MetLife.

The headliner is the Jonas Brothers.

I could really care less.

Okay.

You know who's opening for the Jonas Brothers?

August 10th at MetLife.

I know.

You know, Olivia.

Boys like Girls and All-American Rejects.

What songs do they have?

Gives You Hell.

Josh.

Josh.

It gives you hell.

It gives you hell.

Is that one?

Yeah.

Out there when it's wrong.

We move along.

I don't know.

Move along.

You know, move along.

You know, okay.

Is this when you don't,

when you grow up above 65th Street in New York City, is this how you become a punk rock lover?

I actually think that this is what happens when you go to summer camp.

I think this is Jewish summer camp.

What music were you

listening to in the city

when you were 17?

That I think that, that, I loved it.

And like, but, but also then it was like, that was like the like RB was amazing.

And like pop was amazing.

Like I listened to a ton of Tyo Cruise.

Like, ooh, and like,

that was like, smack that was like my shit.

Okay, you said Gives me Hill.

I'll keep you my dirty little secret.

You know that song.

You know, move along.

Swing, swing, swing, and a table turn.

I don't know that one.

I don't.

I'll be honest.

Your subtleties, they strangle me.

I can't explain myself at all.

No, it ends tonight.

Okay.

All right.

So you're not a fan.

But boys like girls.

Josh, I think you're going to be.

I'm guessing you were in the Sum 41 Good Charlotte.

I'm a Mosher.

I'm a Mosher.

I would go to Sum 41 concerts and I'd run in a circle.

Okay, are these, you just got yourself a masher as though you're listening to like...

I'm a masher.

But okay, but like Pantera's mosh music.

Like that

you were moshing 110 pound kids.

I was I was moshing.

I was definitely afraid.

Like once I went with my friend, he got his nose broken.

So like I would keep my distance from the mosh.

Okay.

But we're like a nice mosh potato.

But yeah, no, some 41.

That was really, that was it.

Let's just see.

Yeah.

In too deep.

Oh, my God.

In too deep.

Still, so am I.

Still waiting for this world to stop hating.

Can't find a so good.

And you love Blink 182?

Love, love.

Peace is the best song.

What is that?

One second.

Are we going to get it?

Pieces, pieces, me.

Don't play it.

We're gonna get a copyright strike.

Sorry.

I just needed to hear this.

I tried to be perfect, but nothing was worth it.

And then I get a razor and I just like pretend to cut myself, but I never would.

You know, it's just like a vibe.

Oh my God.

It's a vibe.

Wow.

Self-mutilation.

Sick.

Ben at 17 sounds like me at 13.

Pop punk.

Wow.

Skateboarding.

Thank you.

Yeah.

Sick.

And like, but you're too young.

Like, because it's, I'm young for it, but like tribe called Quest, Farside, like De La Sol, Biggie, Pac, that just missed you.

Like, it was like cool to say that you listened to Biggie.

It was cool to say that you listen to Nas.

It was cool to say that Wu-Tang clan ain't nothing to fuck with.

It was more like a...

It was more of like a culture stamp.

No, I didn't listen to Nisik, but like, Wu-Tang clan was like, yeah,

we all wore the t-shirts.

Like, I had a Wu-Tang Wu-Tang clan t-shirt because it was cool.

Like, sure.

There was no 13-year-old Jew in summer camp that didn't have Wu-Tang clan t-shirt.

Not one.

We loved it.

It was just cool.

Yeah, it's telling, right?

Because, like, there, there's no,

it's why we're not a monolith, right?

Because, like, I think there are.

certain Jewish kids that grew up my age, your age in the city, where hip-hop culture defined their personality.

They were like, it's like Andrew Schultz, if he was Jewish, but like, it's just, you know what I mean?

It's, yeah.

And then, and then there's not.

And then there's people who listen to Psalm 41 and they're proud of that.

But no,

one, no, seriously, Jews.

I guess that this isn't like a crazy thing.

We love music.

And I, it, I don't know many Jews that don't love a wide variety of genres.

We're a musical people.

Very musical.

I go, I go far and wide with genres.

I like all genres.

I just, I'm, I think music is impressive and it makes you feel something.

And I love a concert.

Nothing better.

Yeah, I love it too.

Should we get to Speakpipe?

We should.

We should listen to Othello Moron.

If you want to ask us a question, get some advice, go to speakpipe.com/slash good guys.

Keep it brief.

Brevity is also key.

Okay, this message is from

Anonymous.

I'm thinking about divorcing my wife.

Hear me out.

First, it's her boss.

Then it's her personal trainer.

Then it's my best friend.

And

yeah, it's just, it keeps on happening.

And I don't know what to do.

I just love sucking cock.

What the hell?

What's that?

It's got a good joke.

That was good.

That was good.

I got to give it to him.

I had to play it.

Okay, this one's from Confused Chicago Girl.

I was ready to give advice too.

I'm like, what are you doing?

Hey, Benny.

And Joshi, I'm a big fan of y'all.

And Jackson Claude.

I have a what are you nuts moment I need your advice on.

My boyfriend of three years and I have been living together in Chicago.

His sister, who's a bit older, is getting married in San Francisco coming up.

She says it's a small wedding, only 99 people, so she doesn't have much space for plus ones and is leaving it to only couples who are married.

So this means that I won't be attending my boyfriend's sister's wedding.

Is this a whaty and nuts moment?

Should I talk to my boyfriend?

Should I talk to the sister?

I don't really know what to do.

I feel uncomfortable.

Thanks.

Appreciate any advice you have.

How long did she say they were together?

Three years.

That's married.

That's married.

I think

I understand

not wanting to

include somebody that will then be in pictures that

will then become obsolete.

I get that.

But three years,

boyfriend, sister, like they're, it's so close.

Like,

I think it's nuts to not include her.

You?

I think you're 100%

right, but I think the only way to win in this situation is to be so aggressively deferential to your sister-in-law.

You only win because you will be proven 100% to be the winner and the right person in this over time.

If it doesn't work out with you and your boyfriend, she will be proven to be the right person.

Yeah.

By the way, if you want to be right, you've got to marry him.

Yeah.

Otherwise, you're wrong.

And maybe you guys should elope a week after the wedding and be like, that would have been so nice.

Honestly,

if you really want to go that badly, get pregnant.

They're not going to turn you away if you're pregnant.

That's amazing.

Yeah.

I mean, but wouldn't you guys agree, like, by her being ultra-deferential to what is clearly not a correct move by her sister-in-law, I think is the way that she wins.

Cause it only looks bad for the sister-in-law, even though her gripe is right.

Agreed.

Right?

Yeah, agreed too.

And you can't mess with a lady in her wedding.

Like, it is what it is.

Okay, next one from Emily.

Hey, Josh and Ben.

Been a moron since day one.

I'll get straight to the point.

I have a mother-in-law.

Love her very much.

She's super awesome.

She's just a little bit overbearing.

we had our daughter about two years ago found out we were pregnant with her a couple weeks after we got engaged so we've been holding off the wedding

but now it's here in about a month or so and she just asked me the other day well she didn't ask me she just told me she was going to give a speech at our wedding

and My brother is giving a speech, his brother's giving a speech, and then I have a maid of honor and a matron of honor, so they're both giving a speech.

And then my dad is giving a speech because that's traditional whatever but um she's saying she has to and I just want to know your opinion like

what would you just let her do it would you not let her do it she's gonna go on and on and on forever I'm a little bit worried that it's gonna be like a three-minute speech

and we already have five people giving a speech so what's the sixth

five's a lot like and you mentioned a lot of family members before you got to the end i was gonna say that it's and I'm always of this opinion, it is your husband's job to manage this mom.

Like, that's just the way that it works.

Whenever I hear that wife is an overbearing mother-in-law, I just know that there is, like, sorry, like a really, really weak husband, because the husband, it's the husband's mother.

he they have a a special bond enough that he could easily take this off your plate sit her down talk to her if it was really important that she didn't speak.

Like,

but

you just mentioned a lot of people that are speaking, and it's not like she's a stranger.

She's your husband's mom.

And if your dad is speaking, I think your husband's mom should be entitled to speak.

Do I like that she like demanded it?

No, but you probably should have asked.

I think it's,

I think that considering you already have five, It's already going to be too long-winded and everybody's going to hate you and it's going to ruin the party.

Two speeches max, okay but you're at five so what's a sixth what do you think yeah i agree with you and i think you've actually you will

a opportunity has revealed itself because clearly with these five you don't have a time limit yet set but now that you have six and you say listen We wanted to honor all of you.

You put it on them.

We would never think to not allow you to have a speech.

Mashiach, mother, we love you.

Brother, schmuck, asshole, matron, maid of honor, usher, best man, fuck you.

This is what you do.

You go, listen, because we have now six people, you each have 60 seconds, 60 to 90 seconds, right?

So you do 60,

you're out at six minutes, maybe like seven and a half minutes with a little clapping break toast in between.

90 seconds, it's going to be a little bit over 10 minutes.

Beautiful.

Like now, if you give everyone hard limits and say, listen, guys, this isn't a suggestion.

Respectfully, you have 90 seconds.

So around 75, start wrapping it up.

Beautiful.

Because they can't get mad at you.

That I completely agree.

And make sure you group them.

Do not do two in the beginning, two in the middle, two in the end.

Don't do it.

Speeches can ruin a party.

They can also make a party.

They can make a party.

They can be great and they can be funny.

Only, you know, you mentioned that your mother-in-law goes on and on.

She'll ruin it.

So put it all at once so that people can,

only the music is taught once.

If the music keeps getting cut, party's over.

My friend at their wedding, the groom's brother wasn't able to be there because his wife had just given birth like the day before and they couldn't fly.

So he recorded this beautiful toast, just a audiophile to be played during the toast for his brother.

And he gives this lovely little toast, really sweet and simple.

And he goes, And you know, bro, I love you.

And I just, I didn't know how to show it.

So I actually wrote you a little song.

I wanted to write you something.

And so, and you hear his guitar tuning up, and everyone's like, because I guess he does play music and he's a good singer.

And so everyone goes, oh my God, he wrote a song.

Oh my God.

And about two seconds goes by, and he goes, nah, that'd be crazy.

That's that's so good.

I've actually been to a wedding where the father wrote a song for his son and he fully sang it.

And this was woof.

Oh my god.

Yacho Zitzler, you're my.

You're my Tatala.

I watched you once or two.

Be it a four,

my little Tatala,

my mantala,

the one that I adore.

You have a little bit of an in sync twang.

It's like, because I'm going for Melania, Melania, where you were one, then you were two.

So good.

My tattoo.

My tater Tatala.

How are we doing on time, Olivia?

We're at 52 minutes.

Oh, perfect.

Let's wrap this thing up.

Do you have a what are you nuts?

Yes.

Our what are you nuts moment of the week are our gripes with people, places, and things, both big and tall, whatever, stick it in your craw.

I went to my cardiologist the other day.

Great time.

Love him.

I read my clinical notes after because I get it on my phone and it said a well-nourished 38-year-old.

The fuck?

What are you nuts?

Couldn't you just write nourished?

Why well-nourished?

Woody nuts.

Leave our boy alone.

He's looking great.

Okay.

Leave our boy alone.

My what are you nuts is I get a carvel, Josh.

There are a lot of carvels in the Hamptons.

I think they're the last Carvels in the world, and they are absolutely delicious.

You get a big, beautiful cake.

You get a soft serve, whatever.

I'm waiting in the line.

I get to the front of the line.

I order a couple of things.

There's a house full of people, right, Josh?

I'm not just getting for myself.

Of course.

And yeah, the line's slow.

It is what it is.

This, this Roy raged, like this guy just left the gym.

He's in like a tank top.

He's like, suit, like, he clearly just did drugs.

Like, he's, I'm ordering.

I, I ordered an ice cream.

Then she comes back.

I order something else.

And he looks at me and he says, you know, it'll all be melted by the time you get home.

What are you, nuts?

Can you shut the fuck up?

Okay.

Can you just shut the fuck up?

It's not going to be melted by the time you get home.

You have no idea how far I live from the Carvell.

Can you mind your own fucking business and wait in line?

You fucking Roy head loser jerk.

Okay.

I don't stand and watch you order your ice cream.

You know,

you know, you know, you're a fucking cops fucking loser.

Shut the fuck up, Reidhead.

Put some sleeves on your shirt, you fuck.

Yeah.

And share the Reids.

Because Lord knows I need some.

And you know what else I need, folks?

I need five stars on this episode.

Otherwise, what are you, nuts?

Listen to us wherever we get your podcast.

Watch us on YouTube.

Share our clips, Instagram, and TikTok, folks.

Don't forget about the talk.

Mondays and Thursdays, we will see you.

Exile.

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Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.