The REAL Founding Fathers

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Bugged?

Wait, Jamie, what's going on?

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That's all I paid for it.

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The following podcast is a DR Media production.

Two Jews, both big and tall, no subject too small for the good guys.

A mother's dream, premium podcast team.

Make it your weekly routine.

It's a good guys.

And if you don't give us five stars, what are you nuts?

What are you nuts?

There were the good guys, they're not the great guys.

Whoa.

Happy birthday, America.

It's July 3rd, almost 4th.

Ben's got a baby.

Josh has got a baby.

Everybody got a baby.

We got babies, baby.

I love babies.

And America, this is our baby, Josh.

USA.

USA.

USA.

What are we eating?

Maybe it's, do the Canadians go USA?

They do.

They do.

They also burn our flags.

They hate us.

The Canadians don't hate us.

Stop it.

I would hate us.

They didn't always hate us.

I think they hate us now.

You don't think they hate us right now?

No, I think there's a contingent.

I remember working up there and like seeing that it was the exact same as here.

Half the people were like, we're this way.

Half the people were like, we're that way.

And mostly everyone was like, who cares?

Fantastic.

I'm in the boat of who cares?

So yeah, USA.

I wonder, what are they eating?

Are they celebrating with us?

No, they have their own Independence Day.

What are you eating?

That's all I want to know.

What are you eating?

What am I eating for the 4th of July?

So the O'Brien family has a delicious pasta salad recipe.

Are you ready for this?

Is it mayo-based?

That's first of all, what I need to know.

Of course.

Thank God.

Anybody who does this pasta salad, okay, with maybe olive oil, a little bit of mustard, this like acidic, wet yuck.

Pasta salad is mayo-based.

And if you're not using macaroni, I'm sorry, you're fucking up.

Continue.

I completely agree.

By the way, good name choice for my third child that's coming that's already here, but we're pre-taping.

But by this time next week, my child will be here.

You'll see it on Instagram.

It already got a million likes.

I can see it now.

Pull it the jackpot.

We're not pre-taping.

Do you understand the dedication?

Josh is literally in the delivery room.

He's there.

And we're talking about pasta salad.

Dude, I posted a brand deal on my wedding day.

You think I'd give a fuck?

For who?

For who?

Who is it for?

It was for like some Twitter thing when there used to be Twitter brand deals.

By the way, amazing.

Great.

Good.

It was the best.

Oh, oh, can I get a tweet?

You need a tweet for a couple G's?

I think we can manage.

A tweet to pay for a quarter of my wedding down.

Yeah, I sent it in the middle of my vows.

As you should, I want to, I want to thank Twitter, Paige.

Oh my gosh, when I was doing YouTube, both of my child's deliveries, I was like, we're going to have to be doing some filming before and after.

My wife is down.

She knows what's up.

She knows what butters her bread.

Do you think one day somebody will get a brand deal from like a chat GPT?

Thank you so much for chat GPT and helping me write these vows.

Yeah, I guess people are probably chat GPTing their vows, huh?

Or at least using it to clean.

I told you this.

I will write something totally myself and then I'll throw it in ChatGPT and I'll just say, make this sound better.

And they do.

At a minimum, you get to read them making it better and then decide if you preferred your tone or their tone.

But if you're writing things and not at least just running it through ChatGPT, you're making a big mistake, folks.

I'm telling you, they're thinking of things that you haven't thought of.

100%.

They just know how to, what's it called?

Olivia, you're more educated than us.

Or by us, I mean just me, because Ben's educated.

Like a style guide.

Do you know what that is?

Oh, a style guide.

Like for a, like for a brand?

Like, like a lookbook or a mood board?

For when, like, when I wrote my book, what they do is when they're doing the copy edit, they basically run it through what's considered a style guide.

And it's like, there's one in particular that was written, I think, in the 60s or 70s.

But you ever notice how when things are professionally written, they just look good?

Like commas be comma-ing.

Like there be dashes and shit.

The thing is, ChatGPT, you got to be careful because I know if you wrote it on ChatGPT based on how many dashes they use, they love that big long dash.

Nobody even knows how to do the big long dash.

I don't know how to do that on my keyboard.

So if I see a big long dash, I know that you did it.

Also, they use, they love bold.

They're big fans of bold.

So if you don't unbold, I know that you use Chat GPT.

I'm just saying.

Yeah.

Check.

You gotta also got to edit the chat GPT.

But you were making macaroni salad.

Okay, so the O'Brien famous macaroni salad includes black olives, salt and pep,

mayo, pimento, pimento, my boy.

I'm telling you, it sounds a little crazy.

And fresh red onions and just a heaping.

I mean, my wife makes it with vegan eggs, which to me is as good as any mayo.

They've really figured out how to make it just right.

And they thicken it up in the fridge, and it is just thebomb.com.

So, yeah, I'll do a couple dogs, couple bergs, slam some max salad, and yeah, and then have a stroke by the time the fireworks happen.

I'm just trying to think about that veganaise.

It's really, you really think it tastes the same.

I do.

Have you dabbled in veganaise?

Have you really spent some time with it?

The thing is, Josh, I have problem with, I have problems with non-full fat mayonnaise like i went over i went to the low fat hellman's josh i went i've jumped right back to the regular hellman's there's just something about hellman's full fat mayonnaise that when i'm going mayo in and for a mac salad i'm going mayo in i like the real thing that said maybe a veganaise i feel like i've tried what's that brand the one that also makes the avocado spray Chosen Foods.

I think they make a good vegan mayonnaise that I've tried that I think it's decent.

I think you are wrongly attributing veganaise with healthier.

It really isn't.

It's as interesting.

It's as fattening.

Let's look.

I think this will be fun.

Let's look up the calories.

It's as fattening and as, yeah, as bad for you as regular mayo.

So what do they use instead?

Like, what's the thickener?

Oil.

Oil.

Oil.

Okay.

Oil, sea salt.

Brown rice syrup, apple cider vinegar, pea protein.

Pea, pea protein.

What would you guess is the fat, the total fat in a tablespoon of vegan aids?

Olivia, feel free to jump in.

The water's fine.

I mean, if it's, if it's 100% oil, a lot, a lot.

I don't know the exact, I don't know, 10 grams?

Nine.

Nine.

Wow, that was pretty good, right?

Really good.

And sodium?

What do you think in sodium?

220?

75.

Okay.

Damn.

Okay, not too salty.

All right, so let's look at Mayo Nutrition Facts.

I just have to say, I know that there's like an age-old debate, Josh.

People love ditch, dix, dukes, hellman's.

And if you live in a different coast, maybe it's best foods.

Hellmans.

It is superior.

It is gorgeous.

It is velvety.

Now, if you eat vegan, then you can't have it.

But for those of us that don't, Hellmans.

Delicious.

Oh, yeah.

So fucking good.

So good.

What is Hellman's named after the family?

And

are they a part of my congregation?

I don't know.

I don't know.

I feel like they could easily be German.

Hellman.

I know.

It's always a toss-up.

I've done some research.

Okay.

Hellman's Mayonnaise is named after its creator, Richard Hellman, a German immigrant who opened a delicatessen in New York City in 1905.

He sounds like a German Jewie gets a pass.

Oh, a pass.

Unta,

I like it nice and creamy when I'm watching the Jews running away.

I spread some Hellmans on the floor so they slip.

Man, those Germans were crazy.

Oh my God.

I love that I started by plugging helmets because I work with them and now they won't work with me.

Yeah, dude.

Oh, it's so good.

Their Mayo, though, really is a plus.

Fantastic.

That was also an interesting one.

Did you always assume that Jason Biggs is Jewish?

Sure.

Yeah, definitely.

American Pie, for sure.

I just think that, yeah, yeah, 100%.

Is he not?

Not even close.

Really?

Is he Greek?

Just like a Catholic kid from Jersey.

Interesting.

Okay, it's the East Coast in him.

Sometimes we conflate East Coast Jewish, you know?

Sometimes it's that energy.

I could see it, though.

Okay, Jersey.

Jersey.

Is his real last name Biggs?

I don't know, but that's not Jewish either, really.

No, no, it's not.

It's not.

Definitely not.

But it's interesting, like, the thing with germans and like a delicatessen is a purely german invention and then jews just saw it as good business i mean it's a shared eastern european food so i think we're all with smoked meat smoked fish blah blah blah but maybe we brought the bagels to it but i'm trying to think of what's like uniquely jewish at a deli a kanish i think we brought them here for the most part right like i think that we we probably i would agree we took some inspiration from our our german brothers or german jews made some delis in Germany.

And then when we came over here, because we had to come over here, we started businesses here and they didn't have delis.

So I think it's more just like we made them here for some of them.

Some of them obviously are non-Jewish owned.

But yeah, I think we also just love these kinds of foods.

We love a good smoked meat.

We absolutely love a delicious soup.

Like these are just foods that are ingrained in Jewish culture.

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Tell me this, because the great David Mannheim from the Dopey podcast, who's also a big mocker at Katz's Deli, sent me a Katz's care package, a KCP.

And it had a really cool, like, Katz's Deli shirt, had some black and white cookies, corned beef, pastrami, pickles, bread.

Good Russian bread.

Delish.

I would say my son eats toast every morning with butter and jam, but it's like this beautiful seedless rye, which he's not used to.

So I would say every morning, I was like, Max, do you want good Russian bread?

I just want to know what he says to his teachers.

They come up to him at lunch, Max, what are you eating?

That's good Russian bread.

And finally one day, Max goes, Dad, can I pass him the good Russian bread?

He's like, can I just have some sourdough?

Can I have Wonder Bread?

Yeah, he's like, I just want sourdough, Dad.

Please.

It's like, fine.

It's funny.

He's like, you have no palate.

But it was funny because he sent me the pickles, which I love, you know, the half sours and the sours.

But my wife, who loves a pickle, I think she's just so used to like the store-bought pickle brands that she was like, oh, this, she's like, I don't know if I love a New York deli pickle as much as, is it something in the brine?

It's It's definitely brinier than like the store-bought pickles.

I love it, but she kind of brushed against it.

What do you think?

You're the food man.

They don't make sour pickles the way that they do at delis

in grocery stores.

One brand does.

Bubbies makes a good sour pickle.

Everybody else, I'm sure she's eating like dill pickles.

She's eating butter.

Exactly.

These aren't, these aren't overly acidic sour pickles.

Now, I grew up on hard fucking sour pickles.

So when I eat a half sour, I'm like, what are you nuts?

Get this floppy piece of cucumber out of here.

I don't want that.

I want it to literally give me heartburn when there's that much vinegar in it and it's been sitting steeped for millennia.

That's the way that I like my pickles.

But I understand why maybe she, she doesn't like that.

She should make her own pickles.

I feel like she'd love that journey.

Get a couple of English cucumbers and go on, add some dill, a little bit of, I don't know, red onion.

You could do pickled onions at the same time.

Steve, when we were talking about macaroni salad, what am I having for July 4th?

Yeah, what are you having?

I'm making three kinds of dogs tomorrow, Josh.

Okay.

I'm just going to, I'm going to, I don't know what they're going to be yet, but I'm going to make three different dogs.

I'm going to go in there, some Hebrew nationals, throw them on the grill.

I'll probably also get some sausages.

Maybe I'll make a sausage, onion, peppers.

I love that.

Maybe I'll do a chili dog, throw some chili on top, ensure that I have diarrhea later in the middle.

Where's the chili going to come from?

I'm going to make the chili.

You're going to make chili?

I think so.

Willy-nilly chili?

You just willy-nilly decide you're making chili?

Why not?

Yeah, get some beef, get some beans.

This hot dog's all of a sudden taking me eight hours.

Maybe you should have a Jew off.

Hebrew Nash versus Sabret versus Nathans.

Fantastic.

I'm in.

Yeah.

Let's do it.

May the best reign supreme.

Definitely.

Should we make our own hot dogs?

That process is gross with the casing.

Have you ever seen how they make deli meat?

Good dogs.

i like it yeah

i love it

i do have some fourth of july facts that i looked up because who doesn't love a fact or or 10 i love a fact the first public fourth of july event at the white house took place in 1801 a little later

francis hopkins designed the first american flag let's i want to do something Oh, did you know Dwight D.

Eisenhower added Under God to the Pledge of Allegiance?

Interesting.

So it was originally just I Pledge Allegiance to the Flag.

And ASAP Rocky added On God to the Pledge of Allegiance.

Okay.

Oh, man.

The Pledge of Allegiance is a nice, you know, it's a nice song.

I don't associate it with July 4th.

I associate it with just like every day at school.

Does Max, do they still do that?

Does Max pledge allegiance every day?

Every day.

I love that.

Yeah, I love that.

And like, you know, I'm in, you know, me, I'm a liberal beach kid and he goes to a beach school and they're doing the Pledge of Allegiance.

It's like gorgeous.

A plus.

I love it.

A plus.

It's great.

Love thy country.

Why not?

Fireworks are a huge business to the tune of $600 million in fireworks imports in the U.S.

each year.

Wow.

And they're probably coming from China.

Just saying.

Just saying.

The cost of your fireworks this year, folks, through the roof.

Might want to save a finger.

I want to know, Josh, how many fingers are lost on July 4th every year?

Let's see.

Oh, Americans spend almost $10 billion on food for every 4th of July.

Jeez.

Wow.

I mean, that makes sense.

What a gorgeous holiday.

Burgers, dogs, maybe some chili on your dog.

Some chips, some pickles.

Trying to think what else.

In 2023, 9,700 people in the U.S.

were treated in hospital emergency rooms for fireworks injuries.

Wow.

And eight reported deaths.

I mean, it is, before I say this, have either of you ever lit your own fireworks?

Yes.

She's from Ohio.

Are you kidding?

They do it at birth.

Yes, they do.

Okay, I'm sorry.

What are you, nuts?

Like, this is, you should have a license.

You should need to have a license to light fireworks.

Like, it's just crazy.

No?

how scary is that the big ones are wild like i not like that but there's like medium-sized ones you might be able to pull off yeah maybe but why would i want to

like i don't want to lose my hand for what the thrill it's not fun i'll go on a roller coaster But that's the thing is it should never be in your hand.

Like if it's on the ground and you have one of those long like barbecue lighters and you can just light the fuse and run away, like in most cases, even like the little giant sparklers or like a Roman candle.

But the problem is people hold them.

Well, they're, yeah, they're morons.

Morons.

But like, what if it just like explodes left?

Like you're running left and it just shoots left.

It could, but I think the most injurious moment is when people are holding something that explodes because you're just, it becomes a grenade at that point.

Do you remember Jason Pierre Paul from the Giants?

Just like one year coming back from training camp with one hand?

Like

he just, like you're, you're a football player and you're lighting.

I don't remember that story.

I just remember he lost, I guess, his finger, a couple of fingers with fireworks.

I wonder if he was holding them like a big dummy.

When the Dodgers won the World Series, there were kids in downtown.

It's a video that haunts me and a kid is just, it blows up in his hand and he's in a Dodgers like jersey and it's just nubs.

Nubs.

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Josh, having nubs, you never have to worry about getting carpal tunnel in your pinky, right?

If I had nubs, I wouldn't have carpal tunnel because I wouldn't have overuse.

Sheesh, so what are you going to, you have an injury to your ulna or you have a carpal tunnel?

What's going on?

I thought that it was carpal tunnel from balancing my phone on, you know, I use my pinky sort of as a base, right?

When I text, I use the pinky as a base.

And I googled and i thought it was carpal tunnel it then came up that it's probably ulnar nerve and if you remember i used to have ulnar nerve entrapment we think it possibly came from golf maybe from chopping right here it runs your hand goes numb in the middle of the night terrible pain i haven't had it in a while but i think it came back it reared its ugly head i went to go into dwayne reed which is like a cvs you guys all have them they don't sell a splint what are you nuts so i got tape i taped my two fingers and i think i taped it too hard because Josh, my left pinky is turning blue.

Yeah, clearly.

So

your body does have a couple mechanisms to tell you when things are foobar.

And one of them is turning blue.

It's blue.

It's blue.

I should probably deal with it.

But yeah, the ulnar nerve is back.

I just wanted to update everybody on that.

The ulnar nerve.

The ulnar nerve is back.

Give us an update on Ruby.

He's gorgeous.

Yes.

He's beautiful.

He's growing.

He's BH, a beautiful plump boy because my wife is just killing it with the feedings.

It's fantastic.

And yeah, just trying to keep him out of the sun.

It's very scary.

Kids can't like zero sun exposure.

Zero.

Why?

Because I don't want them to get burned.

Can't you have no sun exposure when they're like one month?

Is that not a thing?

Did I make that up?

I think so.

No, they can't be in direct sunlight.

That I'm positive of.

Because their skin is too fresh.

They'll get burned.

I'm right.

Well, I think that's true of all kids all the time.

Like, yeah, you don't want them to get blasted by sunlight, but I think like, yeah,

a little sunlight on your kids, probably good.

I don't think so.

I think maybe on the kids.

I don't think on the newborn.

I don't think they can.

What if they're in the car?

We have a shade.

Okay.

I think.

I think I made this up.

I think it's reasonable and probably good, but I don't think it's like, I wouldn't.

Yeah, it's like you have to.

I've put them in a, I've walked my kiddo at a month, six weeks, two months, and, you know, like part of their body like had a little bit of sun hitting it.

They have the awning up, but I'm not like,

of course, sorry.

Yes, like if a hand accidentally catches a ray, it's not going to light on fire, but they're not, I'm teeing you up, they're not RFKing in the tanning booth, okay?

They're not doing that.

All right, you're teed up.

Now go to town.

So there was recently a video of Robert Kennedy Jr.,

Captain Health, leaving a tanning salon.

And what I will tell you is this, Respect.

He probably looks bad like a marshmallow.

I look terrible without a tan.

Dude, we all do.

Tans are the shit.

I have

done tanning beds in the past.

I had to go do one when I was doing a movie when I was 21 years old.

And I was going to have a naked scene in the movie The Whackness, which Ben has all the time in the world and still hasn't watched.

No kidding.

Shit.

I was supposed to watch that last summer.

I mean all the time in the world because you're watching, you know, old girls and sopranos.

You have one hour's time.

And now, and now I'm on to Entourage for the third time.

So good.

Watch the whackness.

Yeah, I know.

I will.

I will.

I only say it because it is such a uniquely New York movie of people after watching.

I'm a terrible friend.

I'm such a good friend, and I'm a terrible friend.

This literally takes me from like great friend to terrible friend.

No, no, you can't be that great if you keep saying that you're going to do something and you don't.

What am I non-committal?

What do I lie?

What am I, a liar?

Just saying, it's on Apple if you need to.

I'm sorry, I will.

RFK.

Go back to RFK.

So, RFK, so I've used tanning beds in the past.

I love it.

I love having a tan.

John Stamos and I would joke with each other because for a while we had the same tanning salon place and we would just text each other when we were there going, I'm in our secret place.

Because everyone looks better with a tan.

But unequivocally, for sure, science says science backed.

Proof is in the pudding.

Real science, not good.

NG, not the best for you.

He was leaving a tanning salon.

Now, I will give him the benefit of the doubt in that I also saw red light therapy being advertised, which is like alternative holistic, supposed to be great for you and does not have any deleterious effects the way UV beds do.

Maybe he was doing that.

I doubt it.

The guy is brown, brown, brown.

So I doubt it.

And it's fucking, that's my woody nuts.

I'm doing it early.

It's just like for a guy who espouses everything about how like health, health, health, health, health.

There's no, you cannot, I can understand someone being like, go out in the sun for 30 minutes a day for an hour.

Don't lather yourself in sunblock every minute.

Get a little bit of vitamin D, a little sun exposure, good.

Tanning beds, nah.

No, miss.

Tanning battle.

No, tanning beds are no good.

They're too extreme.

Way too extreme.

It's like being anti-smoking, but being caught with a cigarette.

You can't do it.

You can't do it.

Absolutely not.

Absolutely not.

Claudia uses these like tanning creams and she's on an all-natural journey.

There's one with beets, Josh.

It makes you look pretty tan.

It does come off after you shower, so it's a very labor-intensive process.

But just in case you ever, in a pinch, you need to make your face look nice and tan, it's a beet serum that tans you.

I would like to try it.

Pretty healthy.

Pretty healthy and probably delicious.

Has Claudia had an alcoholic BEV since she gave birth?

Not yet.

She's waiting for her birthday.

Next week, July 10th, she is going to be having a gorgeous Spritz Society first if my life depends on it.

Okay.

And probably also a margarita.

Both of them.

She loves a margarita, even though acid reflux came to her in pregnancy.

It has left her in her postpartum journey, but I have to think a margarita would bring it right back.

Right.

The shadows, the remnants of acid reflux.

Margaritas are holy smokes, at least for me.

They crush me like acid reflux-wise, destroy.

It's just concentrated lime juice it's too much my mother-in-law makes a her famous margaritas and they do look good i will say are you having a margarita tomorrow of course no alcohol but are people gonna have margaritas a mark like a mocktail margarita why not

sounds like none of the fun and all the acid yeah no thanks maybe add a trilosec chaser absolutely you need it you need it the only thing that i could like the only thing that would even like remotely get me close to feeling like a freebie would be like a cigarette and a happy ending massage.

You know what I mean?

Sure.

Works for me.

That would be the only thing even on the periphery where I'd be like, yeah, I could see that really making a nice afternoon.

I'm down to jigsaw on everything else.

Olivia thought.

Exercise your freedom.

1776.

We haven't smoked cigarettes in way too long.

I'm just saying, like, it's been since we shared a cigarette.

It's been probably two years.

I know.

No good.

No good.

No good.

In that random park on Houston Street.

I'm going to have a cigarette tomorrow in your honor.

I'm going to make sure that Ruby is far away from me and I'm going to have a nice cigarette.

And in honor of our July 4th, I'm going to have an American Spirit.

Yeah, I want you to be ripping a dart outside and then through the window, Ruby can see you.

Just so you like planting seeds about how rad of a dad you are.

Yeah.

Early.

Absolutely.

Is there any better phrase than ripping a dart?

Ripping a dart.

Wow.

Got him.

Yeah.

It's great.

It's great.

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Should we get to some stories?

Yeah, sure.

I agree.

Okay, this is interesting.

Cruz Beckham mocks brother Brooklyn for his many short-lived careers as family feud rages on.

Those are some fighting words.

Cruz Beckham publicly mocked his eldest brother, Brooklyn Beckham, for his many short-lived careers, further fueling rumors of a family feud.

The singer, who is the son of David and Victoria Beckham, took to TikTok over the weekend to share a video from a recent performance of his new single, For Ya Love.

Yeah, I guess they're fighting.

One commenter asked Cruz if he was going to stick with this job or going to become a race car driver next or something.

He responded, wrong brother, mate.

Oh, no.

Yeah.

Oh, no.

All right.

Well, I guess that's what happens when you grow up with a ton of cash.

My friend recently told me that David Beckham has a real watch habit.

Loves a watch.

By the way, one of the better habits to have because they increase in value.

as long as he doesn't lose them he's in business especially rolex man they can really uh yeah really anything i mean he's probably buying knowing knowing his status probably automars probably patex probably what's that that one i forget the name of it athletes love it richard melee richard melee that's like i think those start at like a quarter of a million but they only go up in value watches are the are in a fantastic investment i'd love to see his watch collection though well i've learned have you heard about like kind of the process with something like a Rolex?

Tell me.

Basically, Rolex has entry-level Rolexes that you go to into a Rolex store, those are going to be available.

A Date Just, an Air King, an Explorer, GMT, maybe.

These are going to range anywhere from like a thousand or 4,000 to maybe 15,000.

By the way, they used to be available.

COVID made it so that you can't even go into it.

Maybe now, finally, you can.

For a while, you couldn't even get a basic watch at Rolex.

Well, I think they create the scarcity.

Like, I've heard that about Cartier, that they actually destroy watches every year.

That's true.

I don't know why I'm acting like they couldn't just make more.

They totally could.

They could.

Yeah, they could, but they control the value of it.

That's like saying, why doesn't the U.S.

just print more money to eliminate its debt?

Because then all of a sudden the dollar is worth nothing versus if they hold, they hold value because there's a limited number.

But continue, four to fifteen grand for the for the starter watches.

So these are like entry-level watches.

So if you want like Daytonas are kind of the most coveted, but you want watches that start to enter the 20 to 60 thousand dollar range, like

you need to

establish a relationship, right?

Yes.

So if you've got some scratch, then you go, okay, I got a gift, five people, I got five Olivias in my life.

Don't get any ideas for Christmas.

I'm going to buy like five, $5,000 date just, right?

Yep.

So you start the relationship and then you say to them, I really have my eye on a white gold Daytona, which runs about $60,000 retail.

And so what happens is, is that they'll start to call you when

they get an allotment.

And they'll be like, so now two to three to four to five times a year, you got to be able to say, I'll take it.

And you have to be spending anywhere between $100,000 to $500,000 probably with a high-end watch person to be able to get them for retail because Rolex knows you could resell it for double or triple.

Immediately.

Immediately.

Yeah.

So they're not going to, you're going to be able to get it for the retail price.

But I also heard this.

They tell you, we don't want to see this out on the market for three years.

And if we do, you're out.

You're cut.

Yep.

You're off the list.

So I had this experience.

I haven't told you this story yet, Josh.

I I don't think I've told anybody this story, but I got Claudia a push present.

I got Claudia a Birkin.

And I got, and I got Claudia, and I got Claudia a Birkin from the Hermes store.

So I worked the same way, the same system that you just said, I had to work.

For those of you that don't know, the same exact way that Josh mentioned that you can't just buy a special Rolex.

The Birkin is like the bag.

You can't go into Hermes and buy it ever.

It is impossible.

You have to find a person.

You have have to establish a history.

I had to buy like literally a million of these like tchotchkis.

Thank God at Hermes.

You can buy like a $500 bowl that you'll never use.

Ashtray.

I want the Hermes ashtray.

Exactly.

I'm bougie bat.

It's so nice.

I want to throw my keys in it.

I want to throw my fucking keys in it.

I have an extra ashtray from Hermes.

I'll give it to you.

Great.

It's yours.

Birthday present.

November.

Next gift, just pretend that I bought it new.

What color?

What color?

It's yours.

I think it has an elephant on it.

It's pretty sweet.

Right.

I'll send you blue.

Right?

Green blue.

I'll take gold trim.

i'll send you i'll send i'll send you a picture of it whatever over like eight months i had to establish a history and then one day lovely robert gave me a call he said ben we're in business i go i do it it was a lot of money but when i tell you it was half the price of if you google this specific bag it was half the price because i went through that process and i was able to buy it at the store okay can we play a game can olivia and i play a game and we'll cut this out if it's no i don't have to fine.

It's fine.

Just nobody judge me.

This is a huge moment, okay?

This is a huge moment.

I should get my wife a beautiful gift, okay?

Huge moment.

You and your wife both do well.

God bless you.

God bless you.

Absolutely.

I'm going to say, Olivia, let's you and I, let's play prices right.

Okay, beautiful.

Want any specifics on the bag?

Sure.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Of course we do, right?

This is a non-crazy bag, right?

Like they have like ostrich skin and all that crap.

And those are insane, right?

Those are insane.

This is a 25, if you know what that is, Olivia, Hermes Kelly, gold hardware.

Go.

Kelly Rippa, Kelly Roland.

Got it.

Kelly Catrone.

Brian Kelly.

The list goes on.

You want to go first?

I'm going to say $29,000.

I'm going to say $24,000, $500.

If you go over, you're wrong, right?

Yes.

So you're both out.

Now let me tell you, I paid $14,000 for the bag.

And if you Google that bag right now, it's going for $32,000.

Okay.

The day after you pick it up.

So

we're resellers.

That's our brand bag.

You're resellers.

You're resellers.

Yeah.

So.

Unreal, dude.

I know.

Beautiful.

Yes.

And so now I'm on a list.

So the next time they call, Josh, if you want one, I'm telling you, you could resell it.

It's an amazing business.

You do have to wait, but you get them, you buy them, you flip them.

Same thing with Rolex.

Olivia, just cut this entire section out so my wife doesn't hear.

Thank you.

No, I'm going to get her a push present this week.

Number three.

What, you need a push present?

No, number three can be small.

It's fine.

It's wonderful.

Okay, let's see if there's any other quick stories.

Oh, here's a good one.

Here's a good one.

Billy Ray Cyrus and girlfriend Elizabeth Hurley have a romantic date night in London to support Miley's new film.

Billy Ray Cyrus and his girlfriend Elizabeth Hurley stepped out for a romantic date night to support the country singer's daughter Miley Cyrus's new film, Something Beautiful.

The achy breaky heart crooners and the strictly confidential star walked hand in hand into the Odeon Theater in London.

Billy Ray Cyrus looks like a character from WWE.

Shout out.

He looks like like the Undertaker's thing.

The Undertaker.

Yes.

Yes, he does.

Elizabeth Hurley is stunning and it like, she kind of makes my heart flutter.

Billy Ray Cyrus is a woody nuts.

I'm sorry.

He just like, I remember I, I saw him.

He performed it.

It was like something for like, maybe it was a Trump inauguration.

He performed for something.

It was like Lee Greenwald.

Is that his name?

I don't know.

You were the one at the inauguration.

I'm kidding.

I'm spreading that rumor.

How is the Rotunda, you fuck Duncan?

That's where you and I belong to Rotunda.

I mean, I'm

Is it, I'm Proud to Be an American.

Is it Lee Greenwald or Lee Greenfield?

I don't know.

You know his, this song, whatever.

He sang, and then Billy Ray sang.

And just so everybody knows, I was not there.

I watched him.

And he, my God, I think he was like so blackout drunk they had to ask him to leave the stage.

It was too long.

It was, he went, they were, they kept trying to get Lee on to sing.

And he's like, no, I'm going to sing more.

He could break it hard.

And it's like, get out of here, Billy Ray.

What are you a nuts?

He starts doing a mashup unintentionally.

Proud to be American.

My ain't breaking American.

For anyone who hasn't seen it, please Google Billy Ray Trump.

It was one of the most disastrous performances I've ever seen.

And it was a it was a treat to watch.

Should I feel bad that every time there's an article about Bianca Sinsori leaves nothing to the imagination and fully edible candy bra and underwear set that while I think her and her husband are despicable, I am so attracted.

Yes, you're nuts.

She's an absolute like knockout, right?

I guess.

Like,

I don't know.

She's just like so, at least for me, like so fake and so, she's just always so naked.

I like, I've seen it.

I've seen it.

I guess maybe at first I was like, oh, she's, she's

a nice, voluptuous woman, but she just shows too much.

I don't know.

I like when there's a little bit of mystery involved.

Totally.

I like my ladies.

Like, I like my Chris Angel show.

Mystery.

Should we do one speak pipe before Niamh comes?

One speak pipe.

I'll throw you my what are you nuts.

You did yours earlier, and then we go to

hot.

This first one's from Anonymous.

I am calling in to get your take on something that I have been observing a lot as of late.

I walk my dog in a pretty residential area, and I have been noticing an increasing amount of little yard signs that say something along the lines of, no dog pee in this lawn.

Is that nuts?

And some of the more extreme ones will say something like, I don't pee in your lawn.

Don't let your dog pee in mine, which, if you ask me, are not the same thing.

I am not peeing in their lawn.

And my dog can't read.

My dog doesn't walk up to a yard and say like, oh, can't pee in this one.

Got to move on to the next one.

My dog just has to pee, sees grass, and pees.

So what is wrong with a dog peeing in their lawn?

And am I supposed to just like yank him if he starts peeing?

I don't know.

Is that nuts or am I nuts for thinking it's nuts?

Thanks guys.

This is tough.

If your dog, if a dog is peeing in an actual lawn, it's no problem at all.

It probably like it's it's fertilizer.

I don't know.

It's fine.

It's nothing.

But maybe the lawn is actually astroturf, Josh.

Like sometimes you don't know.

Like sometimes these people's lawns, like they look like perfectly like shaved grass, but it's fake grass and they don't have a pet.

So then like you're peeing on something that they need to clean.

If it's regular grass, I think it's totally nuts.

That said, sometimes when dogs pee, they also then take a dump.

And maybe he had a bad experience, or she had a bad experience where nobody wants to see somebody else's poop in their yard.

That's not fun.

Regular pee, I think it's a little harsh.

First of all, the big witty and nuts here is her, I hope, joking that her dog can't read.

Yes, for sure.

For sure.

I would assume a joke.

The sign is for you, dear, to curb that that mud of yours.

I will say that if you have a lawn or a grass area that is yours in a high dog trafficked area, it's a pish here and there is fine.

But if it's getting pissed on left and right, it'll kill everything because there's urea.

Yeah, there's there's nitrogen.

It fucks up the whole soil concentration.

Okay.

So if your neighborhood has a lot of dogs and they love your lawn, you're screwed.

This is interesting.

So maybe, Josh, I think we just need a slightly more informative sign.

It doesn't need to say, don't pee on my lawn.

It should said, your dog's pee has a byproduct in there that is turning my green lawn brown.

If you don't mind, please don't let him.

Like, if I knew that, I wouldn't let it happen.

I always thought for whatever reason that you pee on a lawn, no big deal.

It's also just not public property.

It is private.

Fair.

I think it's hard when you live though, like, it sounds like she lives in like a cul-de-sac and she's like walking him around or her around and like, I don't know, it's like concrete and then house, house, house.

Maybe I'm thinking that that's the only thing that I can think of.

Yeah, I just think you kind of got to be.

You're right.

It's private property, though.

In charge of your dog.

Like, if people don't want it, like, if the sign is up, they don't want it.

And you just have to honor that.

And I don't think you have any grounds.

I agree.

I agree.

Look at us.

I, I agree.

Do you want to give your what are you nuts moment of the week?

What was yours again?

It was our Secretary of Health, Robert Kennedy.

Yes, absolutely.

Totally nuts.

What else is a what are you nuts, Josh?

Stevia in the raw.

Okay.

What are you nuts?

Yeah, like how aggressive of a name for a sugar substitute.

Stevia in the raw?

I'm just saying this is you need a rebrand.

It's too much.

I think of raw dogging.

Okay.

I'm thinking of hearty sexual intercourse.

yep,

and

yeah, so that's it.

Stevia in the raw raw dogging, nuts without a bad, you know what else, you know what else is nuts, Josh?

What?

Not giving five stars to our beautiful Fourth of July episode where we only spoke about Fourth of July for three minutes, okay?

We talk,

listen to us wherever you get your podcasts, okay?

Watch us on YouTube, YouTube is great, you should watch and listen and listen and watch.

Benny and Joshi watching and listening all at the same time.

It is the circus and Mondays and Thursdays.

We will see ya next time.

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Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.