Rob Thomas asks about extravagant indulgences

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Speaker 2 Welcome to the handsome pod. I'm Fortune Feemster.

Speaker 1 And I'm Mae Martin.

Speaker 3 And I am Tignotaro.

Speaker 2 And we're together on Zoom.

Speaker 2 Yay. Yeah.

Speaker 3 Follow us on YouTube. Go look.
And we're all in separate places.

Speaker 1 Yeah, sadly, but all connected spiritually, as I always like to remind us all.

Speaker 2 I don't have my fake plant with me right now. Does that feel weird to you guys? A little bit, yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 3 What feels weirder is I feel like May has tidied up a little bit behind me.

Speaker 2 Thank you. Let's see.

Speaker 3 Are those all of your Grammys, Emmys, Oscars?

Speaker 2 What am I saying?

Speaker 1 All my Oscars and Grammys. Yeah, I'm trying to get my place organized.
I'm going to, the next step is, I don't know if you can see that crumpled gray pile.

Speaker 3 I see a lump of something.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's going to be, those are curtains for that window. So soon the the window behind me, which is always a source of anxiety because people walk by and it's.
Yeah.

Speaker 3 And so what will it take for you to lift the curtains up and put them up?

Speaker 2 Well, I have it.

Speaker 2 Lift them up.

Speaker 2 Lift them up and hang them.

Speaker 1 You know what I always say? Like when I have a task to complete, I imagine in a movie, you'd have a montage of me doing that task. But my montage would be like.

Speaker 1 starting the task, then sleeping, then doing a bunch of other things. My montage would be a good thing.

Speaker 1 You'd be caught in the the curtains yes and it would be like a two week a two week montage for one small task yeah i started i drilled into the wall immediately hit metal oh metal i hit metal wouldn't go wouldn't go in and i thought i guess i can't drill there went three inches above it started and then i was like what am i doing hit the metal again so i don't know if you gotta go to the other side don't go up oh you know what i mean there might be some kind of

Speaker 3 there might be something uh long ways yeah something long ways i would love to see you both going in like as a as a company yeah

Speaker 2 may you can't look can't go up we gotta go long ways may we gotta go long ways people would be in trouble if i was in charge of this uh task do you think like so imagine we the three of us are given all of the materials to build a house like how could we could we

Speaker 1 what would we come up with what's that getting done i think you'll get something done but it might be, it might be not good.

Speaker 2 Not good with the, I'm not, you know, not handy. I'm not handy like that.
I can figure out a few things.

Speaker 1 You trim your bushes.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I do.

Speaker 2 Sorry.

Speaker 2 Haven't you talked before about

Speaker 2 trimming your bushes in your yard? I do trim a bush, mate. That's correct?

Speaker 1 And then is that you do that with a big industrial bush trimmer, right?

Speaker 2 Well, it's not that big. Let's calm down over there.
Tig has left her body.

Speaker 2 Tig took off her glasses

Speaker 2 to

Speaker 2 have a moment.

Speaker 2 I didn't, by the way, I didn't start that conversation just so you know.

Speaker 2 But May, you are right. I do sometimes trim the bush outside.

Speaker 2 Outside.

Speaker 2 And I have a.

Speaker 3 You do it outside.

Speaker 3 What are we talking about now?

Speaker 2 We're talking about an actual bush.

Speaker 2 I have an electric trimmer that I can do yard work all day long, but I can't build stuff. Like what kind of yard work?

Speaker 3 You do like

Speaker 3 eat weed zibs.

Speaker 2 I mean, I don't, but I could, you know what I mean?

Speaker 2 Okay, tough guy.

Speaker 2 Because in the, I feel like when you, if you, you know, growing up in the 80s or in the 90s,

Speaker 2 a lot of your

Speaker 2 thing that you were put in charge of as a child was yard work.

Speaker 1 Yeah. To get your allowance.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 3 Yeah. Why the 80s and 90s? Yeah.

Speaker 2 Do you see kids out there doing that now?

Speaker 1 No, you have a point there.

Speaker 3 Well, no, but they did it in the 70s, too.

Speaker 2 Oh, sorry. I didn't mean to stop.

Speaker 2 We did not include the 70s.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I'd be curious to hear from our listeners, are their kids, are they putting their kids to work in the yard still, even though it's not the 70s anymore?

Speaker 2 Yeah, the 80s or the 90s.

Speaker 1 In the old days, you would just send your kids out. Now it feels like if you did that, that you'd be watching from the window or you'd be like stationed.
You'd be disguised as a tree.

Speaker 3 Meanwhile, it's not like, I mean, I'm making up a fact here.

Speaker 2 Do it. I was kidding.

Speaker 3 It's not like you're hearing that there's like some rise in kidnapping, you know?

Speaker 2 Yeah, I wonder actually what the stats are on that yeah thomas can you

Speaker 2 as far as a kid being out in the yard mowing the grass by themselves by themselves not getting snatched probably maybe that's kidnapping up or down thomas but i think that's why we maybe why we stopped because in the 70s there were tons of serial killers snatching yeah so does it sit but do you think it was more prevalent in the 70s or it just started kind of then and that was getting snatched or mowing lawns didn't getting snatched sort of start in the 70s

Speaker 1 I think so that that was like there were so many serial killers in the 70s in California specifically why have they ever gotten to the bottom of that

Speaker 2 I don't know

Speaker 1 okay here we go the number of involuntary missing children cases opened each year due to circumstances like kidnapping and abductions including non-custodial family members fell by 27% from 2015 to 2022 FBI data shows yeah that's good it's reassuring to to note that kidnapping cases have seen a decline in recent years.

Speaker 2 Great. Well, good.

Speaker 3 So the fact I was about to make up, I was just thinking, it's not like you're hearing about, and I'm only, you know, main, of course, people get kidnapped.

Speaker 3 I don't want anyone to think I'm saying that doesn't happen or, you know, violent crime happens. I know that.

Speaker 1 Maybe they don't, though, because they're not out mowing the lawn.

Speaker 2 Everyone's inside gaming now. Yeah.

Speaker 1 So I'm glad we got to the bottom of this.

Speaker 2 I don't know how we could. Yeah, I know.

Speaker 3 All I'm saying is just, you know, keep your eye on your kids.

Speaker 2 Don't get snatched.

Speaker 3 That's right. And let us know if your kids are doing the yard work or if you have a service.
We want to know: is this a California thing?

Speaker 1 Well, you know what? Speaking of yards in California, last night I went,

Speaker 1 and I don't know when this episode comes out, but a lot of the houses in Burbank have these Halloween displays on their lawns. And you can go, and there's one called the Burbank Clown House that is.

Speaker 1 I went,

Speaker 1 there were tons of people looking, and it's just this like horrific, super intricate

Speaker 1 horror clown display, really grotesque. And I was thinking, man, that's so cool that someone just did that for fun and they do it every year.

Speaker 1 And then the more I stared at it, I was like, are human beings okay that this is like for fun?

Speaker 2 We're looking at these like

Speaker 1 like torture clowns. Like, I don't know.

Speaker 3 Well, I had that same feeling on, I was on my morning walk in Los Angeles before I left town and walking past these houses that have, yeah, bloody clowns that are like a story high.

Speaker 3 Like they're enormous in people's front yards. And I just, I realized I was walking through my neighborhood just being like, oh, you know, people have these, their decorations out.

Speaker 3 But then when I personalized it and imagined myself putting up a bloody, like four bloody clowns in my yard.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 1 That's what I was feeling. I was, yeah.

Speaker 2 What is that?

Speaker 3 I can't, I would be like, oh, I don't know. This is a little disturbing.

Speaker 2 I don't know if I can do it.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Who lives in these houses? Yeah.

Speaker 1 But there was a palette cleanser one, which was a Disney house that had that had Mickey. And you could line up and get a picture with Mickey in front of the house.
And it was really cool.

Speaker 1 And then I said to someone,

Speaker 1 who do you think lives here? And then someone said, oh, Mickey Mickey lives here.

Speaker 2 Like the guy in the Mickey suit, that's him. He's his house.
I was like, he dug here.

Speaker 1 Just wondering who these people are.

Speaker 2 So this must be like a tradition that these houses do every year. Yes.
Yeah.

Speaker 3 Can I tell you, we took Max and Finn for their fifth birthday to Disneyland.

Speaker 2 How was it?

Speaker 3 We realized when we got there they had never seen anything Disney.

Speaker 2 Oh, really?

Speaker 3 So they didn't know who Mickey Mouse was.

Speaker 2 Oh my God. Oh, my God.
Like you not knowing who any celebrity is. Oh, my God.

Speaker 3 Totally

Speaker 3 Mormon.

Speaker 3 Well, I don't even know if that's Mormon, but like very.

Speaker 1 Amish almost.

Speaker 2 Oh, that's what I meant to say.

Speaker 3 Amish. Like, we went there and, you know, my aunt was with us, and she's very into Disney and Disney for her grandkids, which most people are.

Speaker 3 But it never dawned on us until we got to the amusement park. And Max and Finn, we were like, oh, there's Nikki Mouse.
And they were like, what?

Speaker 3 They didn't know who these characters were.

Speaker 2 Had they just not been interested in watching Disney movies?

Speaker 3 I guess we just didn't show them Disney movies.

Speaker 3 I don't know. Like, Stephanie and I, we're not big Disney people.

Speaker 2 Nicky Mouse every night.

Speaker 3 Yeah, but yeah, and to this day, like... Max and Finn are aware that they were like, yeah, I remember you brought us to Disneyland.

Speaker 2 We didn't know what the hell we were looking at.

Speaker 2 That's so funny.

Speaker 3 We assumed they knew even though we hadn't shown them. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I want to design like a really niche theme park just based on Max and Finn's interest. So they go and they're like, oh my God, that obscure baseball player is someone dressed like...

Speaker 2 Black holes.

Speaker 1 Yeah, black holes and magic cards and Pokemon trading.

Speaker 3 Yeah, and capitals of the world.

Speaker 1 Oh, that's my, I mean, if it's a small world, if that was actually like testing you on capitals, I'd be in heaven.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 3 Yeah. You should hang out with those guys.
Yeah. Not at Disneyland, though.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 How's

Speaker 1 Toronto?

Speaker 3 Good. I just,

Speaker 3 I think I got in yesterday. Yes, I did.
I got in yesterday, and

Speaker 3 we had a table read, and then I have, you know, my spacesuit fitting coming up.

Speaker 2 Just

Speaker 3 all things Star Trek.

Speaker 1 Did I tell you already? I dressed as a spaceman. I went to

Speaker 1 Ama, Parverty's daughter. I went to her school's Halloween thing.

Speaker 2 Oh, no.

Speaker 1 Because I go every year and I want to keep that relationship alive. And Ama wanted me to go.
So I go and I'm in line for the haunted house that the grade fives put on. And I'm so excited.

Speaker 1 And I'm like holding the place in line while everyone's off doing things. And there's this couple behind me.
So I'm dressed like an astronaut.

Speaker 1 There's this couple behind me. And so I'm like, oh, you're having fun.
And they go, yeah, yeah. And they're kind of sizing me up.
And then the wife goes, Are you a student here?

Speaker 1 It's an elementary school.

Speaker 2 It only goes. Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 It only goes till grade six. And I went, really?

Speaker 2 And she said,

Speaker 1 yeah. And she said, I don't know.
And I said, I'm 38 years old, madam.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 Madam.

Speaker 1 Madam.

Speaker 3 Did you really say madam?

Speaker 2 I hope so. Madam, madam.
I don't think you're a madam. Do you think an 11-year-old would know how to say madam? Madam, yeah.

Speaker 2 Oh, that's a wild leap.

Speaker 1 I know. I was flattered, but also all like not flattered because

Speaker 2 you're also like twice everyone's size height-wise. I know.

Speaker 2 You're a big boy.

Speaker 1 I'm a big, strong boy.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 Didn't they see those guns? Exactly. And you didn't take that opportunity to tell her to watch Wayward on Netflix?

Speaker 1 You know what?

Speaker 1 I did have a handful of people saying they watched it, like the parents and stuff.

Speaker 1 And then I've been tagged in a few people's Halloween costumes where this one queer couple dressed as specifically the sex scene from Wayward.

Speaker 2 So, oh boy, yeah, someone was, she was wearing like a do I need to tell you about that scene again, Tig? No,

Speaker 3 no, madam, no, madam.

Speaker 1 Have you guys had people dress up as you for Halloween? And you're

Speaker 1 have you, I guess, you must get that the zombie one, Tig. That's such an iconic thing.

Speaker 3 Oh, yeah, and people will dress as like me and Stephanie.

Speaker 2 Really? Oh, that's great. Yeah.
I get people in,

Speaker 2 I've gotten people in curly wigs, either in a hooter's costume or in a swimsuit with the bush hanging out.

Speaker 1 We're back to the bush.

Speaker 2 We're back to the bush.

Speaker 3 They should have somebody that accompanies them and trims.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 Well, it's based on the story I told in my special, Sweet and Salty, about having to wear a Speedo for the first time as a child, as a 12-year-old. And what you had a

Speaker 2 bush, I had a bush, and I didn't know it.

Speaker 3 And so, did you know it for the first time that day, or you still didn't know, and you were just freely jumping in the water and just enjoying yourself? I didn't know it.

Speaker 2 I had to, they told me in order to be on the swim team, I had to wear a speedo, and I had never swam in that before.

Speaker 2 I, I, my joke was I swim in uh sweatpants and a triple XL t-shirt with the sleeves cut off.

Speaker 2 And it was Team Picture Day. So I confidently stood in the front.
No, no. Thumbs up.

Speaker 3 That's in the picture.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 Fortune.

Speaker 2 I don't know. I don't have the picture.

Speaker 3 Okay, if somebody's listening and you were on Swim Team with Fortune Feamster.

Speaker 2 I don't know if you could see it from the picture because those are grainy, you know, the

Speaker 2 thing. So I, but I figured it out later.
But the joke is I was walking around high five and everybody, very confident. Because when you're 12, life hadn't gotten you down yet.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 Oh, and I even saddled up to the concession stand. I say, bush out.

Speaker 2 So I have had people wear

Speaker 2 bathing suits with murky bushes. Oh, yeah.
Lord.

Speaker 1 But that is a big deal.

Speaker 1 When you're in middle school and you're changing for gym and stuff like the monitoring of who's got pubes yet, like people at my school anyway, and my friend Joe at his school, which was an all-boys school, this guy got pubes first, like, really early.

Speaker 1 And then this was in Bristol.

Speaker 3 So, they did he want you to share this?

Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 They have weird accents, and so someone goes,

Speaker 1 Oh my god, Chris Lever's got spiders!

Speaker 2 Spiders, is that what that means? They were that's what they were calling his pubes, I guess.

Speaker 1 Spiders, he's got spiders, mess.

Speaker 3 You know what's smart? Checking All State First for a quote that could save you hundreds on car insurance. You know what's not smart? Not checking that you brought a towel to the outdoor hot tub.

Speaker 3 Nothing's better than a warm soak on a cold night, but it's going to be really hard to get out of the water if you don't have a towel on hand to dry off right away.

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Speaker 2 Yeah, those were the days. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Just freeing the bush.

Speaker 1 I had friends over last night, and this is.

Speaker 2 That's great.

Speaker 2 Thank you. So good, man.

Speaker 2 Thank you so much. Thank you.

Speaker 1 I felt really grateful because there are people I'm close enough to that, like, we went and saw the Burbank clown house or whatever. And we came back and we were hanging out.

Speaker 1 And I just suddenly was like, in my head, I thought, I'm done. Like,

Speaker 1 I want everyone to leave.

Speaker 2 I want to hang out. Yeah, I want everyone to leave now.

Speaker 1 And I just went and started running running a bath.

Speaker 2 And then

Speaker 1 one of my friends was like, did you just start running a bath? Like, would you like us to leave? And I was like, yeah, I guess

Speaker 2 I'm so much.

Speaker 2 It was crazy to see.

Speaker 3 I would have thought your friends would have read into that as they should get in the bathroom.

Speaker 2 Everyone's all taking a bath.

Speaker 3 I wouldn't have thought, oh, we need to leave. I'd be like, uh-oh, May's running a bath.

Speaker 2 Where's the hilarious night going? Yeah. May's running a bath.
It's about to get wild. I love that you're just like, I want everyone to leave.
So I'm going to run a bath. I know.

Speaker 1 And I should have probably said, I'm tired before I just started running the bath.

Speaker 2 I think probably the thing is like, oh, guys, I got a big run of the bath.

Speaker 3 Or you could just be like, hey, guys, I just want you to leave.

Speaker 1 Yeah. I mean, I do, I'm grateful to have friends I'm comfortable enough with to be like.

Speaker 1 I'm done talking.

Speaker 1 Or the new thing people are saying is going nonverbal.

Speaker 2 That's like the new phrase.

Speaker 1 The general. Oh, yeah.
They're like, I went nonverbal. I really like that.
Like, I think in a friendship, you should have a license to go nonverbal whenever you want.

Speaker 2 Just like,

Speaker 1 I just need a minute to not talk.

Speaker 2 Now, did you end up taking that bath?

Speaker 3 Of course. Fortune.
Great questions.

Speaker 3 Excellent.

Speaker 2 You're getting better at follow-up questions. I'm trying.
I'm trying. And did you have a bath bomb or bath? Both salts of any kind?

Speaker 2 Fortune settled down.

Speaker 3 We're easing in.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I had eucalyptus rock salts that I put in.

Speaker 2 Girls, I soaked this tired old bod.

Speaker 2 Okay.

Speaker 2 With a nice eucalyptus scent. Yeah, it was good.
Okay, any candles or as we call them, condals?

Speaker 2 Condols? Conjuice? Possibly.

Speaker 2 I had

Speaker 1 a Himalayan salt lamp going.

Speaker 2 Girl, I love it. Is this feeling cozy to you guys? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Wait, how's the new bath in the new place? I know we've talked about it.

Speaker 2 Yeah. Are you? It's great.
You taking some long baths. It's not a deep one, but it's a long one.

Speaker 2 So I like that because I'm a tall gal.

Speaker 2 What I like is that it is in the it is placed where the shower is as well.

Speaker 2 So it doesn't matter if water spills, which I love because, as a big, tall gal, water will spill. And I used to get like, oh no, I'm going to mess up the floors.

Speaker 2 Well, this is spilling right into the shower. Yeah.
So the matter. So that's it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 And do you have a big, a floofy bath mat?

Speaker 2 No.

Speaker 1 I think I

Speaker 1 want to get you a personalized floofy bath mat that says, girl, girl, girl, let's lose it.

Speaker 2 I have tested out the pool. Take a load off.
I finally tested out the pool. Okay.

Speaker 2 And it is perfect for treading. Oh, great.

Speaker 3 You don't like nick your little toes?

Speaker 2 Occasionally I've hit the side, but it's not been anything concerning. It's not a pool that you go swimming in, per se.

Speaker 6 Sure, sure.

Speaker 2 But perfect for treading.

Speaker 2 And it's smaller, so it heats up a lot faster.

Speaker 7 Okay, good.

Speaker 3 That's good.

Speaker 2 We don't want to.

Speaker 3 I'm going to do a little bottom cold.

Speaker 2 I didn't tell you. I don't want to get the hot tub, right? It's too short.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 6 Oh, I didn't. It's too short.
What do you mean, short?

Speaker 2 So I got in the hot tub, and I don't know who measured this thing, but like my tits were out.

Speaker 2 Wait, so are you sitting down? You're just sit, you sit down, and it doesn't even

Speaker 3 probably got it from tits out tubs.

Speaker 2 Tits out tubs designed it, and I'm like, who designed this thing?

Speaker 2 Because I'm a tall person and my legs are just touching, my feet are just touching the ground how tall are you 510 that's a tall drinkable and then the top the top of the pool of the hot tub goes to like just kind of like i don't know what is this part of your body under

Speaker 2 undertit the undertit

Speaker 2 your boobs are like well out of the hot tub what so it's mine are really out there

Speaker 2 and i know i'm tall but i'm like any person that so I'm like I got in and I went what

Speaker 2 so in order to like submerge into this hot tub you either have to like not sit on the bench or you have to like lay down on the bench or curl so are you gonna relist this house

Speaker 2 yep I'm putting it back up on sale I mean it's the only thing about the house that they did wrong

Speaker 2 and I was just like who measured this

Speaker 2 so when you got in did you say out loud what yes I did because I was like, Because you're not supposed to have tits out

Speaker 2 unless you hire tits out tubs, unless you hire tits out tubs, you're supposed it's supposed to go like right like just over them, yeah, totally. You can't be all excited.

Speaker 3 And are you topless when you're in? Paint us a picture, you sexy thing.

Speaker 2 I have been topless before, but not this time because I don't have my backyard quite private yet. And are you talking literal backyard or figurative backyard? Like my butthole,

Speaker 2 Fortune Marie. I don't know.
Fortune

Speaker 3 either.

Speaker 2 I just never know what you two are getting at for their mechanisms. Yeah.
Well, I just tore out all, there was bamboo in my backyard.

Speaker 2 What are we talking about? It's actual bamboo. Okay.
Not other stuff. Okay.
But that it grows insanely wild and gets out of hand. So I had it all removed to avoid that.

Speaker 2 And they just planted ficus, but the ficus are going to take a good month to two months to grow. So there's no privacy at the moment.

Speaker 3 And what was the name of this spa?

Speaker 2 Tits Out Tubs.

Speaker 2 So once the ficus are fully in, tits out.

Speaker 2 Yeah. Except they're going to be cold because

Speaker 2 I also. Freaking hot tubs are too short.

Speaker 3 I need to know on the day that you did Tits Out Tub.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 3 Were you also

Speaker 3 bottoms off bath?

Speaker 2 Yeah, I was fully nude.

Speaker 5 Fortune?

Speaker 2 What?

Speaker 2 It's a hot tub in your own backyard.

Speaker 3 I know, but the ficus hasn't taken root.

Speaker 2 I've never not in the new place.

Speaker 2 There's not enough privacy for naked

Speaker 2 here. Yeah.
I'm with you. Okay.
One day when the ficus are heartily in, it will create a wall.

Speaker 2 And that's when it's tits out buttholes exposed. I can't wait for the ficus to be heartily in tits out tub butthole bath

Speaker 2 boy

Speaker 1 so we went from child kidnapping statistics to tits out tubs and

Speaker 2 butthole bath my pool is like so I'm so excited because like what a perfect treading pool and then oh bummer I love you know how much I love a hot tub we do and I can't believe it's tits out tub in there

Speaker 2 and I really wish it were deeper because I love a hot tub. But I guess if I go in there, I have to know I just need to lay down in it.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you're going to have to like just fetal position in there.

Speaker 2 But

Speaker 2 I didn't like the bathtub at my old house and I love the bathtub at this house. So, you know, it's all

Speaker 2 sells out.

Speaker 2 Okay.

Speaker 3 If we have anyone that works at tits out tubs, please write in. Let us know what you were thinking when you made Fortune's hot tub.

Speaker 2 I just think they didn't go deep enough with the hot tub.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but we think and know with certainty that that was intentional because they're tits out tubs and they want it.

Speaker 2 They like it that way.

Speaker 3 They lead with it.

Speaker 2 And maybe, maybe my neighbors, my new neighbors,

Speaker 2 suggested, like, don't go too deep.

Speaker 2 Yeah. Do you want to see tits out time?

Speaker 3 I can't stand those neighbors of yours.

Speaker 2 Or my refrigerator in my apartment.

Speaker 3 Is it beeping?

Speaker 3 Can you hear the beeping? No.

Speaker 2 Maybe, is it not closed?

Speaker 3 it is it it it's closed and i had somebody come up to look at it and they're like oh yeah just press the alarm when the when this beeps and i'm like but how about we fix it so i don't have to okay hold on sorry okay i'll be right back you guys bad talk me while i'm gone okay that tig that tig what a

Speaker 2 tig

Speaker 2 i would did you see that walk to the fridge a little it was like a little was it a cute little cess in the in tig's butt

Speaker 2 I want to see it. I want to see it.

Speaker 2 Look how dikey Tig looks right now.

Speaker 2 What did you say?

Speaker 1 Well, first of all, we were saying that the way you walked to the fridge, I didn't see it.

Speaker 2 It was cute.

Speaker 2 It was cute. It was adorable.
Oh,

Speaker 2 you did a little tushy shake, and I felt like that was for

Speaker 3 you.

Speaker 2 It was for, I think, our handsome watchers. Well, and then I did say you look dikey, but that was a compliment.

Speaker 3 So, wait, when I walked away i was femme and when i came back i was dikey full femme on the way hardcore dike on the way back was it one of those things of like i hate for you to leave but i love to watch you walk away exactly okay well stephanie makes fun of me because when you did have your hands did i a little bit i think or not okay okay you're kind of down to the side at home Stephanie teases me on a daily basis because when I'm in the kitchen and I'm in my zone and I'm like doing dishes, cleaning things up, loading the dish, whatever I'm doing, I do this around the kitchen.

Speaker 3 Okay,

Speaker 2 little hands. Tiggles her dainty hands with her with her little

Speaker 2 bouncy, dainty hands. Imagine Tig saying, girl, right now, that's what Tig's hands are doing.

Speaker 2 And I don't realize I do it.

Speaker 1 You do it unconsciously. You just bought it.

Speaker 2 Completely.

Speaker 5 I don't know. This is my dainty wrist, too.

Speaker 3 I'm in the kitchen and I'm doing this. And Stephanie will be like,

Speaker 3 wrists and I'm like oh yeah I don't even know I'm doing it but anyway so you probably caught a little bit of pretty little lady in the kitchen

Speaker 3 pretty little lady walking to the fridge and then that's right tig okay dyke walking back yeah yeah yeah we gotta have both what'd you do do you unplug it or you there's a button that says alarm and you press the button it's like clearly there's something with this why would you make a refrigerator that beeps so frequently that you have to have a button to press the

Speaker 3 to turn the alarm off?

Speaker 2 Is this one of those apartments where everything's like included, the furniture and everything?

Speaker 3 Yeah, it's a hotel that also has a residence

Speaker 2 part.

Speaker 3 And so they put me in the residence area, which is great because I have, you know, my kitchen and dish or washer and dryer because, you know, I love it.

Speaker 2 You got to bounce around. You've got to

Speaker 2 bounce around. Yes.

Speaker 3 Pretty little lady heading to the kitchen.

Speaker 3 So, yeah, but

Speaker 3 I'm going to be on the phone with the front desk after this.

Speaker 2 Giving them a piece of your mind. That's right.
That's right.

Speaker 3 Well, speaking about pieces of mind, should we hear

Speaker 3 who our question asker is and what's on their mind?

Speaker 2 Yeah, we should. Absolutely.

Speaker 1 Today's question asker, I'm very excited because I met him in

Speaker 1 the Toronto airport a couple of years ago. And he, I always, I go up to people if I recognize them and I like their work.

Speaker 5 And, and he came up to me.

Speaker 2 And this is Rob Thomas from Matchbox 20, who I grew up.

Speaker 1 And also, oh my God, his solo stuff.

Speaker 1 It's a hot one, like seven inches from the mid date.

Speaker 2 Remember that?

Speaker 2 Anyway, I love Rob Thomas.

Speaker 3 I do too. I loved Matchbox 20.
Yes.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 1 Rob Thomas was the lead vocalist for Matchbox 20. He performed on Santana's single Smooth, which won three Grammy Awards and was a number one hit.

Speaker 1 His five albums with Matchbox 20 have sold millions of copies and received multiple Grammy nominations. Rob Thomas is asking today's question.

Speaker 2 Oh yeah, baby.

Speaker 4 Hello you handsome devils. My name is Rob Thomas.
I am a giant fan of all three of you. I've seen all of your specials.
I love what a joke. I loved Wayward.

Speaker 4 It means a lot to me to be able to ask you guys this very serious question today. What is something that you guys spend money on that your younger selves would have thought was extravagant?

Speaker 2 He has, um, I feel like musicians always have like a cool background. It's like a studio with equipment and guitars and stuff.

Speaker 3 Especially when you're like tripping over Grammys.

Speaker 2 No, I hate tripping over Grammys. It's the worst.
They're just always, all these awards are in the way. I don't have any awards except for our ha ha award that we got for the best podcast of the year.

Speaker 2 Oh, and it's just right there.

Speaker 2 It's just hanging off the show. Look, handsome podcast of the year.

Speaker 2 Yeah, nice.

Speaker 2 Given to us by the Montreal Comedy Festival. It's a fun little, I see Maze got theirs in the background.
Yeah. Yeah.
I should have brought mine

Speaker 2 to Toronto.

Speaker 1 I'm amazed you don't travel with it, Take.

Speaker 3 I'm amazed. So, yeah, that I should.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Rob Thomas, very effortlessly cool and kind person.

Speaker 2 What was Matchbox's

Speaker 2 Matchbox 20's biggest hit?

Speaker 2 Push you away. That's it.
Around where I will, will, where I will.

Speaker 1 And also,

Speaker 2 their stuff was so catchy.

Speaker 1 Oh my god, so good.

Speaker 8 Well, that's how they sold

Speaker 2 20 millions and millions.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 Rob also has great taste in comedians, I will say.

Speaker 1 Have you met him?

Speaker 2 I sure have not, but I love his taste in comedians. I love taste.

Speaker 3 He said he likes us three, right?

Speaker 2 Exactly. Yeah.

Speaker 3 I don't think May caught that.

Speaker 1 You just got so southern, though, Fortune.

Speaker 2 I've never did. I sure have not.
I sure have not.

Speaker 2 i sure have not y'all

Speaker 2 no i sure have not i sure have not y'all i sure have not madam

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Speaker 3 They've already read the best-selling book, they already own the kitchen gadget, and that color of bathrobe is all wrong.

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Speaker 4 Hi, I'm Beck Bennett. I thought I was Beck Bennett.
No, no, no, no. It's always good.
Kyle Mooney. Sorry about that.
Exactly. No, all good.
All good. Thanks, buddy.

Speaker 4 Yeah, And we host the show, What's Our Podcast here on Head Gum. But we want to make sure you heard about a very special episode with a very special guest that we just released in the feed.

Speaker 4 Yeah, it's in the feed. It was sponsored by Squarespace because they were appalled

Speaker 4 that we didn't have a website for our show yet. They were like, You don't have a website? What are you guys like? Kindergarteners? They wanted to do something about that.

Speaker 4 So we built a flawless, beautiful, perfectly designed website live on the pod with our very special guest and very web-savvy guests. Should we tell them who it was?

Speaker 4 Looks good. We could play 20 questions.

Speaker 4 I don't think we have time for that. Is it a person? No, it's not.

Speaker 4 It's Finn Wolfhard. But Finn had a bunch of great ideas for the website.
Beck, you had some amazing ideas for the website. Thanks, when you had some amazing ideas.

Speaker 4 Well, I was sort of driving the thing. I was sort of like clicking and I was like, let's put a little, let's put some widgets in there.
I was talking about widgets.

Speaker 4 You kept on using that phrase widgets. Yeah, there's all sorts of stuff there.
And you might want to check out the hippo. Just go check out the website.

Speaker 4 Know that there's a hippo video and know that you're going to want to watch that. We had a lot of fun making this episode.
We all have fun to make this website.

Speaker 4 I think you're going to have a fun time listening to it and maybe watching it. Think of it as our little Christmas present to you.
Yeah, yeah, this is a gift for you. Okay.

Speaker 4 It's just like, it's a selfless thing we did for you. Thanks to Squarespace for making us build a website, sponsoring the episode, and for supporting creators across the Head Gum Network.

Speaker 4 Go check out the bonus episode, What's Our website? From What's Our Podcast on YouTube or wherever you listen to podcasts? Go to squarespace.com slash beckandkyle for a free trial.

Speaker 4 And when you're ready to launch, use offer code Beck BeckandKyle. Yes, sir.
To save 10% off your first purchase of a website Oda MA. Get it, Kyle.

Speaker 3 Your body is your own. Planned Parenthood believes you should have the freedom to make decisions about your health and future.

Speaker 3 Whether you need STI testing and treatment, birth control, gender-affirming care, abortion, sex education, or another sexual and reproductive health service, Planned Parenthood is there for you and all of us, to be honest.

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Speaker 1 They're blocking access to essential health care, trying to deny people birth control, and promoting backwards abstinence-only until marriage programs.

Speaker 1 The attacks on our health care and our basic rights, they just don't seem to stop.

Speaker 3 But you know what else doesn't stop? Planned Parenthood.

Speaker 3 The amazing staff and volunteers at Planned Parenthood health centers across the country do whatever they can to help more than 2 million annual patients get high quality, affordable care, even as some people in power try to stop them.

Speaker 3 Supporters like you power this work. Donate to support Planned Parenthood Now at plannedparenthood.org slash defend.

Speaker 1 Do you remember like the first

Speaker 1 time that you, like the first purchase you made when when you had money? Like I think all of us went through periods of eating instant noodles and like true scrimping and saving.

Speaker 2 but yeah when when was the first time that you were like oh i can afford to do this god i i was always so used to never having money because i grew up with

Speaker 2 uh you know we i i had a roof over my head and uh and

Speaker 2 opportunities so i know i was lucky in a lot of ways but there was a lot of um

Speaker 2 you know, not knowing how we were going to pay the bills,

Speaker 2 a lot of lights getting shut off, water getting cut off. uh

Speaker 2 i remember my mom and brother came home one day and they're like well we gotta pack up the house because we're about to lose it and i was like what

Speaker 2 and um oh my god that's so stressful how old were you in that i was that would have been like my sophomore year of high school and but then my mom found a way to like hold on and

Speaker 2 um classic ginger classic ginger she she kept she was able to keep the house but so there was always like my senior year of college they're like i don't know if you're going to be able to graduate because y'all can't, you know, you haven't been able to pay this last bill.

Speaker 2 And I'm like, oh, my God. There's so always had like something hanging over my head financially.

Speaker 2 And then when I moved to LA, I got here with like literally it's $25 in my pocket. It sounds like a made-up story, but it like

Speaker 2 that is what I had. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Did you have somewhere to stay lined up?

Speaker 2 I stayed on a friend's couch who I went to college with until I could get on my feet. You still live there, right? That's right.
You're still in my couch. That's right.

Speaker 2 And then, you know, I just

Speaker 2 started working my ass off and,

Speaker 2 but didn't really make money for a long time. I made enough to pay my bills, but I had two roommates out in LA for 10 years.

Speaker 2 So my first

Speaker 2 extravagant purchase was a home. And that was,

Speaker 2 that was

Speaker 2 good with 10 years even to be in LA.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 And so were you just really saving and budgeting?

Speaker 2 And oh, yeah. I, well, I, I remember 2010, right before I got Chelsea lately, I made $18,000 that year.
And my, you know, and that's living in LA. Like, rent is like,

Speaker 2 I mean, the majority of that is what my accountant was like, how did you live? How did you, I was like, I just figure it out. I don't know.

Speaker 2 And then I got Chelsea like like six months later, and that kind of saved everything.

Speaker 2 I owed my roommate like two grand in rent when I got that job, and you don't get paid for like the first month of the.

Speaker 2 And I, everybody was like, one of these fancy dinners, and I was like, I don't have, like, I was like, I'll have french fries

Speaker 2 as long as you pay for them. Once I got that Chelsea job, it was the first time in my life I was able to save.

Speaker 2 And I just started saving. And the house I bought was tiny

Speaker 2 and

Speaker 2 you know, expensive for LA, but not expensive. It was not a fancy house at all.
It was like in the valley, like super small. But I was like, I just want something of my own.

Speaker 2 And it ended up being

Speaker 2 the house I still, I don't live there now, but I will treasure that house forever.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Like, so when he's like, are there things now that your younger self would consider extravagant? It's like,

Speaker 2 everything probably. Like,

Speaker 2 it seemed extravagant. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Yeah. Like, I,

Speaker 1 in my teens, I was just in a cycle of debt and

Speaker 1 mainly for drugs, like by like every check that I got was immediately gone. And then borrowing money and lying and owing money and like never being able to get out of that cycle.

Speaker 1 And then when I was like 20, I started dating Lindsay Barton and she just had her shit together and was like 27 and just and she kind of like just slowly

Speaker 1 sorted me out. And then we moved to England together and I was working,

Speaker 1 yeah, so many day jobs and stuff. And the first time that I was like, oh, I can do something like recreational, it was like my friend was doing volunteer work in Spain or something.

Speaker 1 And we met up in Barcelona for a weekend and we like,

Speaker 1 like to be able to go on vacation for a weekend to Europe with my friend and

Speaker 1 buy like paella and wine.

Speaker 1 But we were buying these boxes of wine called Don Simone. And it was, you'd get a box of rosé that was sweeter than Kool-Aid.

Speaker 1 It was so sweet, and it got, yeah, and we had a really fun weekend, but yeah, yeah, I do credit like Lindsay Barton for because she would, I mean, she was like, I want to live my life.

Speaker 1 I'm a grown person doing a master's degree in London, and I had nothing really to bring to the table, but she didn't, she wasn't lending me tons of money, or if she did, like, we'd keep track of it.

Speaker 1 And I just became responsible and I worked.

Speaker 2 And yeah.

Speaker 2 I would say, I would say, currently, I am not not an extravagant person still. Like I'm lucky enough to be, you know,

Speaker 2 comfortable in my life and I'm making money because I work all the time. All I do is work.
So, and I don't have kids.

Speaker 2 So, by the nature of that, yes, I have some money because I'm not having the overhead that some people have.

Speaker 2 I don't buy, I'm not big into like Porsches.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I mean, I do, I lease a car. That's probably

Speaker 2 considered extravagant. Um, And

Speaker 2 I did get a home.

Speaker 2 But as far as like frivolous stuff, I don't I wear t-shirts all the time. And I'm not, I don't like any designer thing.

Speaker 2 I'm not a jewelry person.

Speaker 1 You don't have a diamond speedo?

Speaker 2 I do not.

Speaker 2 I do not. I am not, I'm not really big into stuff.

Speaker 2 So I like, I probably, probably my biggest expense would be going out to eat. That would be something I really enjoy.
I like going to dinner with friends and

Speaker 2 I like good food.

Speaker 2 But I would say

Speaker 2 as far as something I bought that it was out of character for me as far as extravagant is I had the opportunity to buy a multi-cade

Speaker 2 stand-up video game. Oh, yeah, I know, because I wanted to get it.

Speaker 2 I thought you were going to maybe get rid of it when you moved. I don't know.
This thing sniffing around

Speaker 2 with me everywhere I go.

Speaker 2 I bought it from a friend who I think probably regrets selling it. And I love it so much.
It's vintage. It reminds me of childhood.
It's loud as fuck. Yeah.

Speaker 1 But it's so

Speaker 2 has all the games, Gallagher, Pac-Man, Donkey Kong,

Speaker 2 Space Invaders.

Speaker 2 It's cool.

Speaker 2 What about Pong?

Speaker 2 I don't think it has Pong.

Speaker 3 It would be amazing if it was just one big machine for Pong.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 You can plug it in and play away.

Speaker 2 It has the quarter slots, but you don't need any quarters for it.

Speaker 3 But don't tell people that.

Speaker 2 I know. I should just take the order.
Take the quarters.

Speaker 1 I am not good with...

Speaker 1 I do buy a lot of stuff and it's

Speaker 1 not.

Speaker 2 Oh, I know. Your Amazon order alone was enough.

Speaker 1 That was insanity. And also to be supporting Amazon is so bad.
Like, I'm getting better.

Speaker 1 It's on my list of personal improvement that I want to do. But again, I don't have dependents and I work tons and

Speaker 1 I don't buy like cars and stuff. So I do just buy like nice jackets and

Speaker 2 synthesizers and nice jagged

Speaker 2 synthesizers. Yeah.
But I don't know.

Speaker 3 Thank you for using my God-given name.

Speaker 3 I am not an extravagant person myself,

Speaker 3 but I remember when I first started in comedy, I don't know if you guys know Darlene Hunt.

Speaker 3 No.

Speaker 3 She's a really successful writer, producer, now, showrunner type. Oh, I know.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I know who that is.

Speaker 3 Red, curly hair.

Speaker 3 I met her in stand-up. She's so

Speaker 3 deeply funny. It's weird.

Speaker 3 And I remember her getting on a sitcom and being like, yeah, I went to Upfronts, which is like the whole, how would you describe Upfronts?

Speaker 2 It's where they

Speaker 2 networks reveal their upcoming shows.

Speaker 3 Yeah. And so networks will put money into sending people out to New York and putting you in a nice hotel with like,

Speaker 3 you know.

Speaker 3 money to spend on food. And I remember her saying like, yeah, I was just in this really nice hotel and I could just order room service and eat out of the, you know, get whatever out of the mini bar.

Speaker 3 And I was like, what?

Speaker 3 I could not even comprehend. You know, it was like when we were open micers still when she got that.
And I really, it seemed made up that

Speaker 3 this was Darlene's life. And to this day, I have to say that The frivolous thing that I will sometimes,

Speaker 3 not often, treat myself to is something out of the mini fridge in a hotel room

Speaker 3 because that is something I would never have touched. And even to this day, I don't go nuts on it because I'm like, I'm not going to spend $12 on some cashews.

Speaker 2 You know, that's like $2 in the convenience store.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I don't like,

Speaker 3 I don't like,

Speaker 3 I mean, I like being generous, but I don't like spending money

Speaker 3 that kind of way of like $12 cash shoes.

Speaker 1 Right. Same.

Speaker 3 So, yeah, but I would say that is something where I'm like, if I'm stuck in my hotel room and I'm hungry, I'll be like, all right, $8 bag of tiny chips. I'll eat you.

Speaker 1 Would you have a little drink from the, you're not much of a drinker, but would you have like a solo whiskey in a hotel if you're feeling real, like, real emotion?

Speaker 3 There's no world where I would have a solo whiskey. Like, I don't, there's no, there's no.

Speaker 3 In fact, I really, in the past few years, it's so silly to say I quit drinking.

Speaker 2 Because you never really.

Speaker 3 Yeah, because it paints a picture. Like, I really had to finally get rid of that in my life.
But

Speaker 3 I stopped doing that a few years ago. And so, no, I don't have a solo whiskey.
I usually just will have water.

Speaker 1 Some tap water and a color.

Speaker 2 Wild.

Speaker 3 But

Speaker 3 it feels very extravagant still.

Speaker 3 But to me, it's like, I think that the more I'm talking about it, it feels like that,

Speaker 3 wow, I guess I'm doing okay.

Speaker 2 I'm treating myself

Speaker 3 a hotel mini bar.

Speaker 2 Yeah. I won't ever drink the alcohol out of the mini bar because

Speaker 2 that's even like triple the price.

Speaker 8 But

Speaker 2 I I'm not a big, big drinker, but I like an old-fashioned here and there.

Speaker 2 So I'll just go down to the bar in the lobby, get an old-fashioned and go back up to the room. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 3 Yeah. I don't, it doesn't feel good to me to

Speaker 2 plow through, but go ahead.

Speaker 1 I love like like devices and things that are advertised to me on Instagram and like massagers or like like those like face products and things. And I like being generous.

Speaker 1 And so I, for years, thought I am really going all out for Christmas. And I would get my parents these, like, I don't know, like an infrared, like, you know, just this, like, just junk, really.

Speaker 1 And, oh, there's the depuffer.

Speaker 2 I got the depuffer out.

Speaker 1 Yeah. But my parents finally were like, please don't get us that.

Speaker 2 We don't like it.

Speaker 1 It breaks after one use. Like, we don't need it or want it.
But yeah.

Speaker 2 You know what I did when I got an early paycheck from Chelsea lately? Because I had never

Speaker 2 made much money before. I bought everyone in my family Omaha steaks.
And I thought,

Speaker 2 I have made it.

Speaker 2 Steaks for everybody. Freaking Omaha steaks.

Speaker 2 I just remembered that. I totally forgot that I did that.

Speaker 1 What is an Omaha steak?

Speaker 2 There we go.

Speaker 1 Sorry. Is that a specific specific cup?

Speaker 2 So it's

Speaker 2 a company. It's a Omaha, Nebraska.
It's out of Omaha, Nebraska. They sell steaks, but it's kind of the steaks that are like, you know, they're not fancy.

Speaker 3 They're at Sizzler, maybe?

Speaker 2 Yeah, it's like a low-grade steak, but they sell them in bulk. So you can send somebody like 16 steaks.

Speaker 1 That's what you, and that you were.

Speaker 3 I did that for my whole family.

Speaker 2 I was like, I made it. Steaks for everybody.
16

Speaker 3 low-grade steaks for you.

Speaker 3 16 low-grade steaks for you and 16 low-grade steaks for you i'm sure some of their meat is high quality i probably got the very basic box of basic bitch steaks here's here's my question for you fortune uh-huh yeah you have a dead puffer yeah have i seen a huge difference in your face when i see you i'm not using it every day that's the problem okay right i'm just telling you nothing i've noticed nothing.

Speaker 2 May's extravagant purchase was that sauna.

Speaker 1 Oh, fuck. Yeah.
And that was really worth it. And that

Speaker 2 now I'm like, should I have an extravagant purchase and do that?

Speaker 1 Well, the sauna, and probably some research is going to come out that, like, you know, counters this, but

Speaker 1 they really do say if you sauna like three or four times a week, it's your overall health. It's like, like, if you're 40,

Speaker 2 some

Speaker 2 of them.

Speaker 3 40% of all kidnappings happen in Asana.

Speaker 2 Well, I don't want to go to the gym, so I'd much rather be in a sauna. Really? What you're telling me?

Speaker 1 Get yourself some nice aromatherapy was and get that, get that sauna. It is, it is really worth it.
I went this morning.

Speaker 2 I'm

Speaker 2 going to settle into this home because this was my latest extravagant purchase. But I don't see it as

Speaker 2 it's an investment. Yeah.
So I see it as a responsible purchase. But in time, once I've not spent as much money as I recently have, I might look into that.

Speaker 1 Well, you know how Tig did a little, um, pretty little lady scurry to the fridge, yeah. So, picture me in the morning because I go in in just my underwear, and yeah, you know, but shortly,

Speaker 1 but I scurry because I have roommates, right?

Speaker 1 My friend and his girlfriend live in my back house, so I scurry out in my underwear to the sauna, and then I always, when I'm coming out, it's right at the moment that his girlfriend's walking out, and I'm like, and I'm still red.

Speaker 1 I'm sweaty, I'm lobster red, and I'm just scurrying.

Speaker 2 I'm going to say it. I think it's not an accident.
What you think I want her to see? No, no, no. Oh, I think she wants to see it.
She knows when you're coming out of that.

Speaker 1 She wants to see it.

Speaker 1 She's hilarious. She really cracks me up.
She's really formed a relationship with this stray cat. She made him an Instagram account.

Speaker 1 Dean.

Speaker 1 we've named him and she's feeding him.

Speaker 3 She's hilarious.

Speaker 1 And like, I'm just so in awe of starting fresh in a new country where you don't speak the language. And sometimes, or like, I always forget that her English isn't great because we're chatting away.

Speaker 1 And then last night it was silent for a while. And Matt said, What percentage of what I say do you think you understand? And she was like, 15?

Speaker 2 We were like, what?

Speaker 2 And he was like, you're my, they're married. He was like,

Speaker 2 15 percent.

Speaker 3 Wait, what's her first language?

Speaker 2 Chinese. Oh, gosh.

Speaker 5 We're back to percentages.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we're back to percentages on this.

Speaker 2 Yes, there's a theme here.

Speaker 3 Should we hear what Mr. Handsome Face has to say?

Speaker 2 Yes.

Speaker 2 Is that what he goes by? Yeah. Handsome Face or Rob Thomas, either one.

Speaker 3 He knows who he is.

Speaker 4 Like for me, I like a nice hotel room. I like first-class seats on a plane and I like really good dinners.
I don't need to buy things.

Speaker 4 I don't need to own things, but I don't mind spending money on experiences. How do you guys feel about that?

Speaker 2 I do like that.

Speaker 2 I will spend money on travel

Speaker 2 to have like a to yeah, to enjoy another place.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Also, if you're traveling all the time for work and you're exhausted, like anything you can do to make that process a little less

Speaker 3 exhausting. See, I'm so, if I'm traveling with my family,

Speaker 3 yeah, let's go for it. Have a nice vacation.

Speaker 2 If it's just me.

Speaker 2 You're in a hostel.

Speaker 3 I? No, like, what did you say, Fortune?

Speaker 2 I didn't mean to interrupt, but I just got infiltrated by Omaha Steaks. I'm not lying.
What do you mean? What do you mean, infiltrated?

Speaker 2 I just got ADD. Are you online? Are you checking email and Instagram?

Speaker 2 I got ADD. I looked at my email.
Fortune.

Speaker 8 And it says, Omaha Steaks since 1917.

Speaker 2 You've been selected great steak sampler.

Speaker 1 What? Wait.

Speaker 2 Is it listening to you?

Speaker 2 Of course. Of course.
Everyone listens to our podcast, even Omaha Steaks. No, that's creepy.
That's creepy. Sorry.

Speaker 3 But more importantly, Fortune, you cannot be doing your texts and emails and Omaha steak ordering. When you are on with us, you are focused.

Speaker 2 All I did was just click one thing.

Speaker 3 When you are on with us, you are focused.

Speaker 2 I'm focused. I'm focused.
Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt.

Speaker 2 What was my intro? Introduced my experiences.

Speaker 3 Oh, when I'm on the road,

Speaker 3 I just go.

Speaker 2 Here's the thing. Courtyard Marriott.

Speaker 3 Well, first of all, my favorite thing when I check into a courtyard courtyard Marriott is saying, Oh my gosh, I'm so excited. Which way is the courtyard?

Speaker 2 And then they're like,

Speaker 3 Oh, we don't have a courtyard.

Speaker 2 I'm like, Really?

Speaker 3 This courtyard Marriott, right?

Speaker 2 False advertising.

Speaker 3 But I heard, I don't know if it's true, that Bob Dylan chooses courtyard Marriott as well. Somebody told me that.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 Really?

Speaker 3 I started it for the mattresses. And then when I stayed at places nicer and not as nice

Speaker 2 i

Speaker 2 i like a courtyard marriotte mattress that's what you like i stand by the double tree gives you chocolate chip cookies i do enjoy that that's nice

Speaker 2 they're not vegan i don't think i know i don't think i've gone to a hotel and clocked the mattress oh really does you have a bad back

Speaker 2 No, but I feel like that's probably coming in

Speaker 2 time.

Speaker 2 Well, I have a bad back.

Speaker 3 I had spinal spinal fusion. And boy, do I have to keep an eye on what I'm sleeping on.

Speaker 2 Oh, yeah, for sure. If you've got that going, then you would notice that a lot.

Speaker 1 And are you like a Marriott member or something?

Speaker 3 Oh, my God.

Speaker 2 I can lift points there. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 There you go.

Speaker 2 I like the boutique hotels usually when I'm traveling. I like the little local, whatever cute hotel they've put in that area.

Speaker 3 Yeah, but you know what? Not very reliable mattresses at boutique hotels.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I do like a chain where I know there's going to be just your basic gym, your business center, your

Speaker 3 tits out tubs.

Speaker 2 Your tits out tubs. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 Your, what was it?

Speaker 1 Butts out bath.

Speaker 2 Butts out,

Speaker 2 butthole bath.

Speaker 2 Usually these boutique hotels have one of those coffee shops shops where the people are real turds to you. And I love that.
You like that?

Speaker 2 When you're getting the meaner they are, the better the coffee is.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that checks out.

Speaker 3 Yeah, that didn't happen for me in New York this last time.

Speaker 2 Oh, really?

Speaker 3 Oof, the brain was so mad at me.

Speaker 2 And shitty coffee.

Speaker 3 It was just fine. It was perfectly fine.

Speaker 2 Not worth the tude.

Speaker 3 No, I asked for half decaf.

Speaker 2 As you do. Yeah.
Yeah. Anyway.

Speaker 1 And what she was like.

Speaker 2 He. yeah.

Speaker 3 He goes, so decaf?

Speaker 3 And I said,

Speaker 3 well, no, if I could get two shots regular and then two decaf.

Speaker 3 And he stared at me like I had ordered

Speaker 3 a Frappa, Whippa, cherry on top.

Speaker 3 You know, like, I was just like, man, I just want,

Speaker 3 you know, a quad cap half decaf with almond milk. Fine.
It's not straightforward, but that's what I was in the mood for. It wasn't that insane.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 Anyway, anyway.

Speaker 3 I was a jerk.

Speaker 3 Well, that was lovely hearing from Rob Thomas. I really am a fan.
And

Speaker 3 if anybody cares, I have a tour right now.

Speaker 3 Tickets are on sale for my out of nowhere tour. Go to tignotaro.com for all my tour dates.
I'm hitting mainly minor markets right now.

Speaker 3 And I don't mean that in an offensive way, just smaller cities, smaller towns.

Speaker 2 So,

Speaker 3 you know, hitting all that first.

Speaker 2 Also,

Speaker 3 the documentary I produced, Come See Me in the Good Light, is out on Apple TV. Check that out.
Share it with friends. What's going on, guys?

Speaker 1 I have a tour. I'm going to 35 cities.
I'm really pumped. And tickets are on maymartin.net.
It starts at the end of February.

Speaker 1 Come see if I'm coming to your city and then come say hi. And I'm going to do stand-up and then mix in some music and improv and all kinds of things.
So come.

Speaker 2 Awesome. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Later this month, I'll be in St. Petersburg, Florida, and Orlando, Florida, and then Norfolk, Norfolk, Virginia, Salt Lake City, Vancouver, and Seattle.

Speaker 2 And at the top of the year, New Orleans, Mobile, Atlanta, and Cincinnati. So check those out.
Fortunefeemster.com.

Speaker 3 Also, go to handsomepod.com for merchandise and

Speaker 3 rate,

Speaker 3 review, subscribe to the podcast as well as our YouTube channel, and also share your favorite episode with a friend. This community continues to grow and it's just the coolest.

Speaker 3 So thank you everyone for listening. And until next time, what do you say we

Speaker 2 keep

Speaker 2 handsome?

Speaker 2 Handsome is hosted by me, Fortune Feemster, Tig Nataro, and Mae Martin. The show is produced, recorded, and edited by Thomas Woulette.

Speaker 2 Email us at handsomepod at gmail.com and follow us on social media at handsome pod.

Speaker 2 What a podcast!

Speaker 2 What a podcast!

Speaker 1 That was a head gun podcast.

Speaker 2 You know what's smart? Checking all state first for a quote that could save you hundreds on your car insurance. You know what's not smart?

Speaker 2 Not checking that you get some stamps when you're sending out thank you notes.

Speaker 2 You wrote thoughtful notes to everyone who RSVP'd, and now it's going to take an extra trip to the post office to get everything mailed off.

Speaker 3 Yeah, checking first is smart. So check All State First for a quote that could save you hundreds.
You're in good hands with Allstate.

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Speaker 2 Hi, I'm Nicole Bay.

Speaker 7 Hi, I'm Sashir Zemeda.

Speaker 2 And this is the podcast: Best Friends.

Speaker 2 And we're here at HeadGov.

Speaker 7 So, this is just a podcast where we just talk. Yeah.
We're best friends. Yeah.
We talk, and then we have a segment where we answer questions and queries.

Speaker 7 So, audience members can ask questions about friendships and we can answer them to the best of our abilities. Yes.
We are professional friends. We are professional friends.

Speaker 7 Subscribe to best friends on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. And watch videos on YouTube.
New New episodes drop every Wednesday. That's the middle of a work week.

Speaker 7 I was deeply unhelpful to you during that whole thing.

Speaker 2 You were. I'm really so.

Speaker 7 I was so okay. I was trying to be supportive.
Yeah. But I was like, I don't know, reading seems pretty hard right now.

Speaker 2 It's a lot. I think you did good.
Thank you so much. You're welcome.