How I met my husband AZ - Don't judge a book by the cover

Hi guys, happy Friday.

And when it's Friday, it's a new episode of Cat on the Loose season two.

I'm incredibly excited because we started this season with two very, very, very knowledgeable guests.

One was Nora Wendell, she's a relationship expert.

And then we had April Davis, who is a matchmaker.

She's the owner and founder of Luma Matchmaking, which is one of the top luxury matchmaking companies in the entire United States.

And April agreed to be a recurring guest here in our show.

And that's fantastic because it means every month we're going to have her here once a month to answer questions from an expert point of view about dating, about relationships.

And if you ever wanted to know anything about how it is to work with a matchmaker, what we noticed is that a lot of people feel intimidated.

They're not sure how it works.

They're not sure if it's for everyone.

And April is here to pretty much dismystify the subject.

So, if you guys have any questions whatsoever about dating, about relationships, about breakups, about how do you date after a divorce?

How do you start over?

How do you get over heartbreak?

All of these things that we've been talking about, keep sending them to me because April is going to be back with us really, really, really soon next month.

So, what?

In a couple weeks.

Now, today,

I've been getting a ton of messages, even since season one when I started.

People asking me,

because I said I was married, and you guys have been asking, who are you married to?

What happened to your marriage?

Where is your husband?

Who is your husband?

How come you talk about all these dates, but you never talk about your marriage?

And it's a super long story.

It's a crazy story.

It's so crazy that I'm actually writing a book about it and I'm finally almost done.

Thank goodness.

But you know what they say?

Reality is many, many more times more interesting and crazier than fiction and in my case i totally believe that it is so today i'm gonna start telling you guys about my marriage and i'll start from the very very very beginning the first thing that happened my husband was from an italian family so my name zamuto was is from him it's not my maiden name

And his family came from Sicily.

He was born in Boston, but from a Sicilian family.

I met him a very long time ago.

I was super, super young, fresh out of college.

And I met him at a bar with a friend.

At the time, he lived in Boca Raton.

For you guys that are not from Florida, it's a fabulous, very nice city north of Miami.

And he lived in a fantastic house in Boca

on a canal with a boat dock, really, really beautiful house.

And when I met him, he already had a ton of money.

He was a very, very successful executive.

And he was going through a super nasty divorce.

So in the beginning, we were pretty much more like just friends.

We met at a bar and we started talking.

And he was so sad about his divorce.

So he invited me and my friend that I was with to go to his house the next day and he would do a barbecue for us.

So we get to his house.

And I'm just going to call him AZ because he was the most private guy in the entire planet Earth.

He was the kind of guy that didn't even use Google.

He didn't like cell phones.

He didn't like social media.

He used to say that he liked money because money was freedom to him, but he didn't want any part in anything public.

So, anyways,

I get to his house and I'm there hanging out.

And he was a gentleman for sure.

He would serve like champagne and water and cook.

And he would totally make me and everybody else that was was there feel like a complete, complete guest.

But, anyways, the very first day that I'm there, me and my friend, and we brought another friend, so it was the three of us.

And he's sitting there and we're drinking and laughing, and he's cooking all this fabulous food because he loved to cook.

And then, at some point, after a few drinks, he looks at me, he's like, Oh, you know,

I would never date a Latin girl.

You Latins are really bad.

And I said, What?

Excuse me?

Yeah, I would never date a Brazilian girl, by the way because i know how you guys are you're all pirates you come to the united states and all you really want is a green card and i know your game you're just gonna try to get pregnant because you don't have any papers and that's the image i have of all you latin girls but especially brazilians i've heard horrible stories about these brazilian girls

That took me by surprise.

First of all, because as much as I am Brazilian, I was born in Brazil.

I never really lived in Brazil.

I lived in California 99.9% of my life.

I'll tell you guys that story one day.

And

because I was never really around anybody that felt that way.

So I looked at him and I was like, excuse me?

Are you serious?

He was like, yeah, I'm serious.

I think you guys just want to pull some kind of

a stunt, some kind of a game with Americans because you want something.

And most of the time, it's a green card because you guys, you people don't even have papers.

So I

got my passport, my American passport out of my purse, which I had for a very long time.

And I threw it at him.

And I said, well,

I don't need a green card and I don't need anything because by the way, I got my own green card when I was very, very young, with my own merit, working many, many many jobs and finally opened my business and I got a first I got a work with then I got a green card and and I'm an American citizen and at that time I was like 23 years old

and

by the way mr.

AZ you see that brand new BMW parked outside your mansion that's mine I just got it with my own work and if that's how you feel goodbye I felt super offended so I grabbed my passport and I just left.

And why am I telling you guys this story?

Because after that day,

he started calling me and calling me and calling me and invited me over and sent me flowers and took me out to dinner to apologize.

And he respected.

I understand where he was coming from because I am sure a lot of wealthy guys have bad people around them, like we all do.

Beautiful girls have bad people around them for different different reasons.

I've had a gazillion men approach me for the wrong reasons because they think they're going to have sex right away, because they think I'm easy, because they think they can pay me for sex.

And I'm sure men have these problems with girls.

A lot of girls approach men for the wrong reasons.

But once I said that, I said, look, I am proud.

I've been working since I was four years old.

The first TV commercial my dad put me on, literally I was four.

It was for a shop, the opening of a shopping mall.

And after that, I worked over and over and over and over again in a gazillion TV commercials.

I did music videos.

I did so many fashion catalogs, I don't even remember.

And then I started working on different things because

I wanted to put myself through college.

And my dad wasn't supportive of me going to college and stopping my modeling career.

And he thought I should be an actress because I lived in LA.

And I said, no, I love to study.

I'm going to go to college.

And he said, okay, then you have to pay for it.

So I had every job that you guys can think of on the planet.

My mom owned the restaurant.

I used to go to Brazil on my vacations and help my mom at the restaurant.

I've done everything in my life.

So at this point, when I met this guy, yeah, his house was nice and everything.

But honestly, I didn't really care.

because I was proud of myself that I had a job.

I had a company.

I was making decent money for a 23-year-old and I wanted him to know that.

And I think it's important that I'm telling the story because if it's a girl out there

and some guy makes you feel any like smaller or less than what you are, don't let them.

I think it's really important that we stand up for ourselves.

I tell you guys, I've been judged.

by the way I look.

I think maybe it's the blonde stereotype.

And I know I'm not saying all blondes have gone through this, but I know a lot of them have because I talked to my blonde friends.

People have this stereotype.

So they see this blonde girl and cute and everything.

And back then, we didn't even have social media.

It was really just photographing for fashion, for catalogs, for photographers.

for different things.

But people still have this perception.

Oh my God, she does photo shoots.

She's a dumb bimbo.

He used to joke about that.

Oh, you're just a dumb bimbo.

but i'm not dumb and i was never a bimbo i just work really really hard and i think modeling can be just a as a respectable job as any job that anybody can have so anyways after that day um he took me out and yeah we continued to date and he apologized and before that

he was a guy very wealthy

going through a very nasty divorce.

So of course he was dating all kinds of girls.

He would just invite girls to go to his house, to pretty much party, drink, and swim in his pool, and whatever.

Once he met me, he said, Oh my God, you may not be the prettiest, you may not be the skinniest, you may not be the tallest, maybe you are not like a Playboy bunny, but you are so intelligent and you are so real.

And that's what made me stand out in you.

And I really know for a fact,

I ended up spending 15 years with him, and that's the next story I will tell you guys.

But I know for a fact that what made him fall in love with me and, in the beginning, decide he was gonna date me and all the other girls that were around him was the fact that A, I was very authentic, I was very upfront about everything, I was very real about everything, and B, he appreciated the fact that I was working, that I wasn't there to just get his money and say, pay me, pay me, pay me.

No, I I was proud that I had a job, I had a career, I had interests,

I had hobbies.

And the reason why I decided to tell this story first and foremost is because I know a lot of girls out there suffer from low self-esteem.

Sorry, guys, I had to have some water.

You've been through

bad relationships.

People make you feel worse than what you are.

People make you feel bad about what you do.

and i think it's very important when we meet somebody that we should tell them who we are and what we do and where we come from and believe me um

after

my marriage with him he passed away in 2018 by the way you you guys can hear all my horrific dating stories from season one for some reason i got tangled up with wrong man after wrong man after wrong man and this is something i'm still trying to learn why i keep repeating the pattern.

But I really, really believe maybe at some point I forgot about who I was and my worth and where I come from.

And after talking to all these experts, I realized, and even doing this podcast and telling all the stories out loud, I realized that we always need to remember our worth, who we are deep down inside.

And the people that really like us, that really care about us, that really love us they're not just gonna look at us on the outside and judge us i think that's a horrible mistake i have been a victim of that my entire life and as much as i have like super thick alligator skin because i grew up in la which is a place that you know everybody judges you especially in the entertainment industry in the beauty industry so i'm used to it

But I don't appreciate being judged from the outside.

And I really try very hard not to do that to anyone i think the message i guess i want to send with this episode is get to know the person listen to what they have to say listen to their stories because only the people that have lived through something know what they have been through only we know the weight on our shoulders only we know the roads we walk by only we know our experiences.

So I think it's extremely unfair to look at someone like like KZ did to me the first time, like a lot of people have done to me.

Even last year, I lost somebody that was insanely dear to me.

That's another story.

Because somebody went and said something horrible on me and gossipy and lies.

But I think ultimately, if you really care about someone, if you love them, or even if you just like them, give them a chance to tell you their story.

Listen to them.

Give them a chance to tell about their experiences and why they act the way they do and what happened to them in the past and and anyways about their lives

don't judge we are not I at least that's my opinion I'm not here to judge anyone and I don't think it's very nice to be judged but anyways luckily Once I did that, I told all those things to AZ.

I have my own passport.

I have a company.

I have a car.

He appreciated me even more.

So anyways, I hope you guys have a wonderful weekend.

And remember, when you meet somebody, whether they're beautiful or not, or the way they act, or the way they dress, that doesn't mean anything about how they are inside.

I think the most important thing about ourselves for sure is our core, our ethics, our values, our heart.

And nobody can take that away from us.

It doesn't matter if you take a sexy picture, it doesn't matter if you make a mistake, it doesn't matter if you say a bad word, it doesn't matter anything because we all make mistakes obviously.

What matters is what we have inside.

This was one Marquette on the Luz.

I'll see you guys next week.

I have a fabulous guest coming up next Tuesday.

He's a super brave guy, Giuseppe Annunziata, entrepreneur, Italian who lives here in Miami, and he's kind enough to agree to let me interview him.

So if you guys want to pick a man's brain about the world of of dating and relationships, shoot the questions.

He's going to be here live next Tuesday.

And I wish everyone a wonderful weekend.

The weather is so great here in Miami, and I hope the weather is nice wherever you guys are.

And even if it isn't, you know, I hope you relax, watch movies, take care of yourselves first, exercise, eat healthy.

Love, love, love.

Much love.

Always to me, love is the answer.

I love you guys.