FRENEMIES - A surging trend

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Speaker 6 So, guys, before I even start the episode, I want to say that when my team and I were talking about the trending topics and important topics we needed to speak about, I really wish this one was not one of them because I am such a girls' girl.

Speaker 6 I am all about women, empowering women, that it definitely makes me sad to say that frenemies is such a trend right now. So what is a frenemy?

Speaker 6 Well, have you ever had a friend who kind of claps behind your back when you fail

Speaker 6 and goes completely silent when you win? Somebody who says, oh, I'm so happy for you, but you actually know that underneath they're not. Yes, that's not your friend.
That's a frenemy.

Speaker 6 And lately, it feels like they're everywhere.

Speaker 6 We've been getting literally dozens of messages from women all over the world saying that, oh my god, I can't believe this person was a frenemy to you to me. They did this and that and that and that.

Speaker 6 So today on Carondalooz, we're talking about why fake friends are on the rise, how you can spot them, how you can protect your peace for once and for all.

Speaker 6 And of course, I am going to share some very personal stories of frenemies that have happened to me. So if you never heard that that term before, what exactly is a frenemy?

Speaker 6 A frenemy is someone who pretends to be supportive of you but secretly they compete with you, they criticize you or even worse they drain you.

Speaker 6 It's the I'm just being honest type or the type that keeps completely silence when she sees everything on your social media and says absolutely nothing about it.

Speaker 6 The one who remembers every single mistake you make but forgets about all your success. Psychologists call this relational aggression.
It's subtle.

Speaker 6 It's social sabotage, gossip behind your back, exclusion, backhanded compliments. What's a backhanded compliment?

Speaker 6 For example, if a friend sees you after a few weeks, like, oh my god, you look really good in that color, although it's not the best color for your skin tone or wow you look beautiful for your age and research shows women experience this kind of behavior more and more often because we are conditioned to keep the peace even when it hurts us and of course if you consider someone a friend many times In the beginning, you are wondering, is this behavior acceptable?

Speaker 6 Is it okay? Is she really just being honest? Or is she not actually my friend? Why is this a growing trend? We asked several episodes, and this is the summary that we came up with.

Speaker 6 Increased competition, which is really sad, right? I don't think women should look at each other as competition. I think women should look at each other as just other women doing their thing.

Speaker 6 And if you agree, great. If you don't agree, move on.
But I really believe there is room for everyone. And usually, successful people don't consider other women competition.

Speaker 6 They consider other women somebody they might potentially collaborate with.

Speaker 6 But basically, experts say that because of increased competition, contemporary culture often promotes a sense of one-upmanship, whether around social status, finances, or career advancements.

Speaker 6 This creates environments where competitive dynamics, jealousy, and distrust can easily turn a friend into a rival. For example, speaking of social media, right?

Speaker 6 Maybe you have a massive, great, amazing social media presence, and a friend, a K-frenemy, has a tiny social media presence or doesn't post as much or is not as popular as you are.

Speaker 6 So she's looking through your posts and everything, and instead of being honestly, oh my god, I'm so happy for her, this is amazing, she starts wondering, well, why can't I have the same?

Speaker 6 Social comparison culture, as I was just saying, social media exacerbates the human tendency for social comparison.

Speaker 6 Constantly seeing others' seemingly, seemingly perfect lives or successes can fuel insecurities and envy, making people more prone to developing or recognizing friendly dynamics in their own lives.

Speaker 6 Lack of clear friendship norms. While society has established ways to end romantic relationships, there are no widely accepted norms for breaking up with a friend.
That's true, right?

Speaker 6 Many times we wonder, like, well, she's been my friend for so long, she's been my friend for so many years. Do I tell her that this friendship is going south?

Speaker 6 Do I tell her that maybe we're moving in different directions? We don't really know how to, quote-unquote, break up with a friend.

Speaker 6 This lack of a clear exit strategy means a lot of people often let problematic friendships linger in a quote-unquote friend-me state.

Speaker 6 Personal and strategic benefits, despite the emotional toll this causes on us, individuals may maintain frenemy relationships for strategic advantages, which I don't think is nice, such as access to power resources or specific social circles.

Speaker 6 The frenemy might also provide sharp but honest feedback or serve as a motivator to improve oneself.

Speaker 6 For example, like I was saying, if you have access to amazing events or great networking, maybe somebody is around you. Oh my God, that happened to me so, so much while I was married to a wealthy guy.

Speaker 6 Like for 15 years, people were around me because I threw these lavish parties, because I had access to the most exclusive events in the world. I had beautiful homes everywhere.

Speaker 6 And all the time, I actually thought those were my friends. But once my husband died and I lost all my assets, they ran away like rats.

Speaker 6 and that made me realize wow I was surrounded by frenemies I was surrounded by people that were simply trying to take advantage of me as opposed to really cared about how I felt and unfortunately many times something bad needs to happen in your life in order for you to realize is that person really my friend Was that person a champagne friend, meaning they were only around for the good times?

Speaker 6 Or was that person a frenemy, literally just using me me to their advantage and hoping everything would crumble

Speaker 6 around me and of course there are the psychological factors personal attachment styles and fear of abandonment can lead people to stay in inconsistent or emotionally taxing relationships low self-esteem can also make a person less likely to recognize or end an unhealthy connection.

Speaker 6 I had a lot and like I said I I'm s I'm doing this episode and I'm saying that with a heavy heart heart because I wish I could tell you that we are as women we are all empowering each other we are all trying to make the business world the personal world better for all of us because I truly truly believe from the bottom of my heart that we are so much stronger together and unfortunately I had such horrible experiences with women in my life that it's very painful to even talk about it.

Speaker 6 For example, I had a woman friend. She was my best friend in this world.
I actually did a video about it on TikTok that went viral because we were friends for decades, decades.

Speaker 6 I'm not talking about one year, two years, five years. We were friends from since before college.
We went through college together and then we continue to be friends for decades.

Speaker 6 I considered her a sister because she was an only child. We called each other sisters.
We were glued to the hip. We went through everything, you know, all passages of life that you can think of.

Speaker 6 I was a maid of honor in her marriage. She came to my marriage.
Then she had two kids and I was always there for her. Then she lost both her parents and I was always there for her.

Speaker 6 And because I married someone very wealthy and we had multiple homes, She would always come to my mansion in Las Vegas for vacation, first alone and then with her kids.

Speaker 6 Obviously, because I could, I would pay for everything. I would take such good care of her.
I was always a sharer.

Speaker 6 I always had no problem whatsoever sharing whatever I had with my friends because I believe that's how relationships should be.

Speaker 6 If I have more than you and I love you, I am so happy and excited to share everything that I have with you and that's how I was with this person.

Speaker 6 And for decades and decades and decades, we were always there for each other through the good and the bad times. horrible things that happened to me, horrible things that happened to her.

Speaker 6 We were always there for each other. And then once my husband died and I went through the hardest, darkest period of my life, I literally lost all my assets.
The courts did not enforce the will.

Speaker 6 I found myself in a really, really difficult spot. I was mourning the death of my mom and then I was mourning the death of Anthony.
a year apart from each other.

Speaker 6 Then I figured out that I lost everything that took me 15 years to build with him. I was jobless.
I was penniless. I didn't have a support system.
I didn't have any any family anymore.

Speaker 6 She was literally the one person in this world that I thought was family to me.

Speaker 6 And when I was trying to start my life over and in this horrible, horrible, horrible headspace, I put my dogs in my car, I moved from Florida where everything had gone down.

Speaker 6 I said, I'm gonna start my life over and rebuild in in California because this is where this person lives, and Beverly Lewis is my happy place.

Speaker 6 I was literally just trying to function and get my head to work properly and just try to make ends meet. And I remember it was just a few days, Thanksgiving

Speaker 6 2021, right? Now we are almost in Thanksgiving 2025, so it was a few years ago. And I remember I was standing outside this tiny Airbnb that I had rented for me and my dogs, and I was so desperate.

Speaker 6 I honestly wasn't even functioning well enough to remember how talented I was and how I could make money and all those things.

Speaker 6 And I remember calling her and saying, you know, I really desperately need your help.

Speaker 6 I need you to help me get an apartment so I can start my life over because moving from Airbnb to Airbnb has just been so difficult on me. And it's almost Thanksgiving, it's almost the holiday season.

Speaker 6 So please just make sure you co-sign this for me. By the way, I'm a person that I always pay, even my toughest hours, I always pay my bills on time.
I'm very responsible. I'm very respectful.

Speaker 6 And I thought, well, I've been helping this woman for decades i don't even know how many well over a hundred thousand dollars i i threw her away on gifts vacation support things for herself things for her kids so i honestly didn't think was a big deal what i was asking said you know help me get an apartment so i can start rebuilding my life and she basically blocked me she blocked me She blocked me from WhatsApp.

Speaker 6 And I remember standing outside this Airbnb with my dog and I went inside and I cried and cried and cried, and I was like, No, there is no way this is happening.

Speaker 6 The last lifeline I have in this world, the last person I consider way more than a friend, of course, she's gonna come to her senses. It's almost Thanksgiving.

Speaker 6 Of course, she's gonna call me and say, you know, come on over, let's spend Thanksgiving together. Of course, I'm going to help you.
But that day never came. She did not unblock me.

Speaker 6 The days became weeks, weeks became years, and she never spoke to me again.

Speaker 6 Because in my darkest hour, in my hardest time of need, she decided that she did not want to be my friend, quote-unquote, friend in me, right?

Speaker 6 Because now I know all the years that she was around me, it was because I was providing her with certain things that she wanted.

Speaker 6 I was providing her with lavish vacations in Las Vegas, in other places, in Beverly Hills. I was buying her lavish gifts.
I was taking care of her, taking care of her kids, taking care of her needs.

Speaker 6 Now, obviously, it was one of the biggest heartbreaks of my life.

Speaker 6 I tell you guys, it was toughest than any breakup, than almost anything that I've been through in my life because I really thought our friendship was forever.

Speaker 6 And that's when I realized: wow, there are definitely frenemies in this world, and it's very hard to trust someone again after somebody does that to you.

Speaker 6 But the silver lining is that once you lose everything, and the day that you actually need a friend, if they're there for you, you're like, okay, this person is really a friend, because it's very easy to be a friend, a champagne friend, right?

Speaker 6 When you guys are drinking champagne and having fun.

Speaker 6 But if they turn their back on you to that point, like I'm not going to speak to her again because they desperately needed your help, they show you who they truly were.

Speaker 6 So after that, not by choice, my closest friends to this day are men. And I guess I have to say that in many ways, men are easier to deal with.
I don't know, I just get along really well with men.

Speaker 6 And again, not by choice, because I would love to have close girlfriends. But I think when you tell a guy, like, oh, I accomplished this and that and that, they're like, oh, cool, that's amazing.

Speaker 6 I'm really happy for you. Or if you're like, oh, I was able to buy this new pair of shoes or I bought this car, they're like, oh, wow, that's amazing.
Congratulations.

Speaker 6 Or if you tell them, oh, I'm dating this guy and that guy and he's doing this and that and that for me. They're like, oh, wow, you know what? You deserve it.

Speaker 6 And very, very unfortunately, so many times, women are just not capable of being that happy for another woman.

Speaker 6 And please, I know there are exceptions, I know there are some women who have incredible women friends out there, and that makes me super happy.

Speaker 6 And I'm saying, in general, it is very, very unfortunate that this frenny trend is growing.

Speaker 6 And then, unfortunately, it happened to me again, not at the same scale as this girl, because, like I said, this girl, we were more than friends.

Speaker 6 We considered each other sisters and we knew each other for so many decades.

Speaker 6 But when I finally started putting my life back together, piece by piece, step by step, here in California, like a year later, I met a really nice lady, really nice girl, and we hit it off immediately because

Speaker 6 she's a business owner. She has a very successful business in the luxury space.
And because she works as much as I do, I think we connected because we were like major workaholics.

Speaker 6 We work crazy long hours trying to build our business.

Speaker 6 For those of you guys who don't know, other than doing Cat on the Loose, I do own a PR marketing, branding, and social media agency that I started building from scratch, one step at a time.

Speaker 6 And nowadays, I'm very happy to say I have clients worldwide and I love what I do.

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So anyway, I really connected with this girl and we became very good, very close friends. I thought.

Speaker 6 So at one point, don't even ask me why because I don't even know. She ended up staying like two summers ago, she ended up spending six months sleeping at my place on my couch.

Speaker 6 I never asked her questions. She never told me why.
She used to live like in a really shitty, crappy apartment with a roommate and I don't know why she never wanted to go back to her place.

Speaker 6 For six months, I did not ask her any questions. Obviously, she needed me.
She needed my help.

Speaker 6 So regardless of what I was going through in my life two years ago, working like a maniac, doing the podcast, building my business, dealing with my dogs, I just let her stay there.

Speaker 6 I would cook for her. If I order food for me, I order food for her.

Speaker 6 I gave her clothes to wear because again, again she would not go back to her place I don't know if it was a major issue with her roommate if it was a major issue with the place I basically was the best possible friend I could for her and I did everything I could for her with no questions asked not once I said hey by the way since you're staying here for so many months do you want to contribute with the rent, with food, with anything?

Speaker 6 Not once I asked her for a penny. And she was having some issues at work with her clients.
I would sit in my computer and help and guide her to the best of my ability.

Speaker 6 I thought, well, I want to be that friend that I'm always here for you, no matter what it is that you're going through, without any questions asked.

Speaker 6 And at one point, she was like, I have a trip to Europe. I got to go to Europe because my clients are going to be in Europe, blah, blah, blah.
So I was like, okay, I tell you what.

Speaker 6 Let me help you pack a bag. I want you to look amazing.
I want you to look incredible in Europe on the strip. I know you're in the luxury space.
I know how important it is, right? Images, everything.

Speaker 6 So I help her pack.

Speaker 6 I let her take some of my best clothes from back when I was rich. Designer dresses, designer shoes.
I let her take one of my little Christine Lebuton summer sandals.

Speaker 6 And most importantly, this is like another crazy story that I put on social media that went viral. I have still three Birkins.
I had many more, but they're gone.

Speaker 6 Long story with what happened after my husband died, but I still have three Birkins.

Speaker 6 One of these Birkins, a nude Birkin, is very, very special to me because it was a Birkin that I gave my mom while my mom was alive.

Speaker 6 And when my mom died, I'm like, okay, I'm going to take the Birkin back. So this girl said, well, can I borrow the Birkin to go to Europe? And I was like, yes, sure.

Speaker 6 I know it's going to be great for you. I do know people care about status and what how you look like and I know Birkin is a status symbol.
Yeah, go for it.

Speaker 6 So we packed this bag for her, packed with my designer dresses, clothes, coats, shoes, you name it.

Speaker 6 And she takes the Birkin and she goes to Europe and she does her trip and she comes back and she's carrying the Birkin up and down, up and down, up and down.

Speaker 6 So finally, months and months later, she moved back to her place and she still had my Birkin and she still had a bunch of my my stuff that she didn't return.

Speaker 6 So almost like a year later, I let a year go by and I'm watching her with my Birkin all over the place, my Birkin on social media.

Speaker 6 Finally, one day I wanted to use the Birkin to go on a really important meeting. So I sent her a really polite message like, hey, let's call her Maria.

Speaker 6 Hey, Maria, could you possibly give me my bag back? And she was like really annoyed. She's like, instead of saying, oh my god, yes, absolutely.

Speaker 6 absolutely, she sends me this crazy message: you don't really want to use it, you just want to take it from me. I can't believe she got pissed at me because I was asking for my bag back.

Speaker 6 Finally, after asking many, many times, we meet and she gives me the bag back.

Speaker 6 And when I see my bag, and you guys are welcome to go to my TikTok and Instagram to see the videos, the bag was trashed, like the handle was broken.

Speaker 6 I actually did a video comparing my other two Birkins with this Birkin.

Speaker 6 I take really good care of my stuff, my shoes, my bags, because I'm still not in a position to be able to spend 10, 15 grand on a bag again as I am rebuilding my life.

Speaker 6 But when I saw the Birkin, I was like, what the fuck? Is this girl joking? Basically, the bag was trashed. Like, it smelled like perfume, like food, the handle was broken, a complete disaster.

Speaker 6 So I take pictures and videos and I say, hey, Maria, by the way, like, what the fuck? You know, did you see you broke the handle on my bag?

Speaker 6 And I actually show it to her, like, look, and again, instead of being apologetic or saying, Oh my god, I'm so sorry, let me fix it for you, right? That's what any decent human would, I would think.

Speaker 6 She gets pissed at me. She's like, Oh, I didn't do anything wrong, you know, whatever, it's going to be way too expensive to get it fixed at her mess.

Speaker 6 And she totally disappears and never offers to fix the bag or even apologize. Another year goes by, and I continue.
At this point, she starts dating some really rich guy.

Speaker 6 This rich boyfriend, great, fantastic. I'm happy for her.
At this point, I never met her boyfriend because for some reason she did not want me to meet her boyfriend.

Speaker 6 That's when her frenemy clauses start showing more and more and more. So, anyway, this boyfriend moves her into this super fancy apartment and she moves all her stuff.

Speaker 6 And I'm sending her messages like, okay, since you are moving, maybe you can find my Laboutin sandals back and give me my Labutons back. Maybe you can find my other dresses that you took back.

Speaker 6 So I'm sending pictures of my stuff that is missing

Speaker 6 and half of it comes back trashed, half of it never comes back. She's like, oh, I don't know where it is.
I never had it, la la la la, although I have pictures of everything.

Speaker 6 And finally, two years later, this year, literally, after asking 10 million times, sending pictures of the nude Laboutin sandals that she had, I'm like, Do you think maybe, possibly, you found my sandals?

Speaker 6 She returns my sandals in a bag, and same thing: the Laboutin sandals are trashed, rashed. And I'm like, Well, Marie, I can't believe it.

Speaker 6 I mean, look how I, this is the picture of how the sandals, how you took them, and now you return them trash.

Speaker 6 And again, she's pissed at me, like, oh, I didn't do this, I don't care. Never offers, never offers to fix it, to clean it, to apologize.

Speaker 6 So it's honestly, I'm not a person, I'm not very attached to material things. I think this is a lot more, and this is why I'm telling you guys the story.

Speaker 6 I think this is a lot more than the material thing.

Speaker 6 I think this is the gesture of you would never treat a friend like that. If you borrow something like a dress or a purse, hopefully you take the dress to the dry cleaner.

Speaker 6 You thank your friend so much, right? And a bag, I mean, I never even imagined an adult was capable of trashing a bag or shoes.

Speaker 6 But if you did that, I mean, offer to pay for it, offer to fix it, right? It's the least you can do, especially somebody like her that has a lot more money than me. But like, nothing, nothing.

Speaker 6 I never got an apology. She never sent a bill.
She never offered to fix it.

Speaker 6 So after all of these situations, I finally, and I actually tried meeting with her for coffee and I tried talking to her and I realized that this person, for whatever reason, does not like me because she had complete disregard for my things.

Speaker 6 She looks at every single one of my social media accounts. I have several, right? I have my personal one, my business one, my podcast one, one for my dogs.
She looks at every single one of them.

Speaker 6 So she sees whatever it is that I'm posting. Like when I my indie movie was out, I was in a movie, I produced a movie, I went to the Cannes Film Festival to promote my movie.

Speaker 6 First time in my life, so that was a really big deal for me. Pretty much everybody I knew made a comment, sent a message like, oh my God, we're so happy for you.
This is incredible. Congratulations.

Speaker 6 She saw all of it, all of it. And not one little like, not one little comment.
And I mean, she knew it was something that I was working on for so many years.

Speaker 6 So finally, finally, I'm like, you know what? I cannot have this energy in my life. And I blocked her from all my accounts.

Speaker 6 And then one day she sends me a text like, oh, why did you block me from your accounts? And I said, well, this is why, because your energy was getting so heavy in my life. I have no idea why.

Speaker 6 I'm sure you had your reasons, but I realized you're not my friend. I realize you don't like me.
I realize you're not happy for me. And I realize you have no consideration for me or my things.

Speaker 6 And I just needed to block me. And I think that's a big part.

Speaker 6 If you find out somebody is being a friend to you if they did something horrible to you do whatever it is that you have to do like why would you let a friend me keep looking at your social media I know a lot of people continue like let her see my success let her see my success I'm a person nowadays My inner circle is all about quality, not quantity.

Speaker 6 I think we always say we have hundreds and hundreds of acquaintances, but I think the real friends are very, very few.

Speaker 6 So nowadays, after everything that I've been through, I think my inner circle is all about quality, not quantity.

Speaker 6 And if somebody treats me with disrespect, it's like, okay, you're out of my life because I think our energy is a privilege. Our energy and our private space is not a free-for-all.

Speaker 6 So if you're wondering if you have a frenemy in your life, what are the red flags? How can you spot a frenemy?

Speaker 6 Because these women many times are masters in disguise this is how sorry I had a sip of my love drink I'm obsessed with this this new beverage

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Speaker 6 15 grams of magnesium sodium potassium it's really great for you and and uh nothing bad on it because I don't drink sugar check it out drink love but anyways how do you spot if you have a frenemy in your life first of all they usually disappear when you're doing great right like this girl completely disappeared when she saw that i was out and about promoting my movie totally disappear and then all of a sudden if they think you're going through something tough they text you they love to joke at your expense they share your secrets with someone else under the excuse of being concerned they copy your style or ideas and pretend it was theirs they post bestie photos or photos with you while secretly resenting you.

Speaker 6 They treat you or your personal belongings, like in my case, with total disregard. They vanish or block you in your time of need, like my childhood friend did to me.

Speaker 6 So, if you're constantly second-guessing yourself around someone, or if you feel this horrible vibe of disrespect coming from someone, it's your intuition probably talking to you that this is not safe energy, that this person

Speaker 6 is not really your friend. So you may ask why is it that smart, strong women like ourselves keep frenemies around? Many times it's because we're afraid of being alone.

Speaker 6 Author Rachel Simmons, which is someone I really love, said this

Speaker 6 quote that I love. Girls many times try to avoid being alone at all costs, even if it means staying in abusive friendships.
But here is the truth. Peace and solitude are better than fake support.

Speaker 6 The wrong friends cost way more than no friends at all. And obviously, I just shared two powerful stories that happened in my life that taught me this lesson.

Speaker 6 Don't keep a friend in me around because you're afraid of being alone. Because learning how to be alone or learning how to make new better friendships is a very powerful, amazing lesson.

Speaker 6 How do you handle it? The first step is what I just did. Admit to yourself what is really going on.

Speaker 6 So like if you have somebody that you feel you're getting this vibe and this energy in your life, the first step is to admit, okay, I love this woman, but she for some reason doesn't like me or for some reason she cannot be happy for me.

Speaker 6 She's my frenemy. The second step is Set boundaries.

Speaker 6 Try to communicate to them like I try to communicate with Maria like, you know, you disrespected my stuff, you had complete disregard for what I let you borrow, you don't return things properly organized and clean, you don't celebrate my successes.

Speaker 6 And she dismissed all of it. I tried communicating.
So the first step is try to communicate. If they say, oh, I'm sorry, I apologize, I'm going to be better.
Okay, maybe they will.

Speaker 6 Maybe they can change. I'm not saying they can.
But if they completely dismiss their behavior, they're like, oh, what the fuck are you talking about? I didn't do that.

Speaker 6 Or I didn't trust your stuff or I didn't gossip about you if they're continuously denying their behavior or how you feel maybe that's it maybe that should be the end of that that friendship because you need to protect your energy you need to protect your inner peace and you need to protect your space in my case like with Maria I'm like you know what I'm gonna block this woman because Why is she looking through all my social media to find out what's going on in my life?

Speaker 6 If she doesn't want to be a part of my life, she doesn't want to celebrate my achievements she has no respect for everything that i've done for her so in my case i decided i didn't want to have her around so you know reduce your access to that person just stop giving them the front row seat to your life and again end it if you must if this friendship hasn't felt supportive for a while Wish them well, but choose peace.

Speaker 6 Remember, you're not being mean, you're not being cold, you're not not being a bitch you're being clear I think the takeaway is that you don't need more friends you need truer friends protect your energy protect your inner circle and your life will expand in ways you never imagined every time I get rid of somebody toxic in my life all of a sudden I meet someone incredible amazing who is a true friend to me who actually really cares about me in incredible ways.

Speaker 6 And I think we need to make space for that. And before we close, I want to mention one more thing that always really bothers me, especially in this day and age of social media.

Speaker 6 If you see a woman on social media, whether you know that woman or not, like let's say a stranger, if you see someone on social media that posts something you don't like, whether it's a photo, a comment, a video, be the classy woman that just walks away.

Speaker 6 Don't be the nasty bitch that that leaves a horrible comment about another woman. I cannot stand when people do that.
I believe in karma. I believe in energy so much.

Speaker 6 And I think from the get-go as women, we are always having to try to prove ourselves more, right? If we are too sexy, we're called sluts, we're called too sexy, we're called unprofessional.

Speaker 6 If we dress too conservative, we are prudes, we don't like sex, we don't do it. There's like a no-win situation.

Speaker 6 in so many different work areas women get paid less than men we have to prove ourselves more if you are blonde you're a dumb blonde if you are cute you're inexperienced or if you are too experienced you have a male masculine energy there's always something always something that people say towards us It's never a win-win-win situation.

Speaker 6 We are constantly having to prove ourselves. So we definitely don't need more women trashing whatever it is that we do.

Speaker 6 And by the way, the trolls on social media are usually always people dealing with their own personal issues.

Speaker 6 You very, very, very rarely will you see a super successful, happy woman taking any time of her life, even if it's a few seconds of her life, to leave a nasty message on another woman's social media account.

Speaker 6 So, this is my suggestion to all of us as women, everybody here listening to the episode, and please share with other women friends that you know.

Speaker 6 If you see something that you don't like, let's keep scrolling, like move forward. There's like billions of social media accounts in the world.
Follow the people that you do like that align with you.

Speaker 6 And if you do see something you like, leave a heart, leave a comment. Be that woman that uplifts other women because together we are so much more powerful.
And communicate.

Speaker 6 If a woman did something that hurts you that you don't like don't give her the cold shoulder don't go hide behind a man if you have a man you know talk to her sit down and say look you did this to me you did that to me can we try to figure out and save our relationship don't be nasty to another woman if you can communicate explain i love being the woman that uplifts women as busy as my freaking days guys and i'm not joking people that know me know that I work any given day, seven days a week, between 15, 16 hours a day.

Speaker 6 My days start around 5 a.m. and they end usually around 10.30, 11 p.m.

Speaker 6 I juggle multiple things.

Speaker 6 I have dogs, like my life is crazy busy, but I swear to God, every single day, no exception, I spend a few minutes here and there scrolling through my social media feeds just so I can leave a sweet comment to my friends, to new women I see out there, people I admire.

Speaker 6 I always make sure I have something nice to say because I believe this energy and this karma comes back to me.

Speaker 6 So I think we should like send this message worldwide to our growing worldwide community wherever you are listening right now. Let's be a woman that empowers other women.

Speaker 6 And of course, we're not going to agree with everyone. I understand you don't agree with certain things and other people don't agree with other things.
So if you don't agree, just move forward.

Speaker 6 And, same for guys, guys. If you're listening, don't be that douche that criticizes a woman's appearance, or she's too fat, she's too old, she's too thin.

Speaker 6 If you see something online that you don't like about a woman, move on.

Speaker 6 And if you see something that you love about a woman, by all means, leave a sweet compliment because the more you compliment people, the more you say nice things about people, you know, they might do the same and say it back to you.

Speaker 6 I hope, really, really hope that this frenemy surge decreases. I hope it's not something that increases.
I believe there is space for all of us to shine. Yes, there is competition in every area.

Speaker 6 There is competition in everything we do. But I'm still a huge hopeful that we can collaborate.
as opposed to criticize and trash someone else in order for us to be successful.

Speaker 6 That is absolutely not necessary. And to my frenemies out there, I wish you nothing but the best.

Speaker 6 I always send love their way because I think it's their own issues if they are incapable of being supportive of another woman. So let's try to be more supportive of each other out there.

Speaker 6 I love you guys so much. Be safe out there, no matter what.
And I'll see you again very soon.

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