"Elevated Messy" (w/ Rachel Sennott)

Transcript

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Look, man.

Oh, I see. My eye.
Oh, my. Mo and look over there.
Wow, is that culture? Yes, goodness.

Las cultoristas.

Ding da. Las cultoristas calling.
We have reconnected

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of impact

this pitch this

this right here we're proud of this girl and we've known her when so basically we were discussing before the episode began a moment kind of in history yes if you would go back with us so i guess like 2018 2019 i think 2018 2019 around there it was the bell house i don't think so honey and this was a time when we would like corral like 50 people together bow and i would sit on stage we would do i Don't Think So Honey live.

Five people would come up. They would do I Don't Think So Honey after I don't think so honey, they'd filter it out.
We'd call it like gay Bonnaroo. Gay Bonnaroo.
Now we would call it

Gay Kiltoni or something.

Yeah, now there's like the references would change, but like we would like be before the show, like saying hello to every single person that we had booked.

And we were so excited because Rachel Sennett was coming on the show, who may be the guest on this episode. You'll have to find out in like a minute and a half.

But I remember going over, and you only have so much time to say hello to everyone because it's 50 people. And I'm just like saying, hi, hi, hi.
And then I see Rachel and I go, hi, oh no,

oh no, oh no, because she's sobbing. She says, This is one of the worst days of my life.

And we'll get into why. She's like, I'm so excited to be here.
This is one of the worst days of my life. And we'll get into why on this episode, starring I Love LA Creator,

DP, star, et cetera. All the sort of titles this one holds.
This is one of, I would imagine, I'm not going to speak on your behalf, but one of the best weeks of your life.

And it's only getting better from here.

We'll bring her in.

She didn't confirm her just now.

This is

a former guest of the show, but we've had, this is her first time in person with her, which feels so insane, wild, and more.

Everyone, please. Let's go.
Let's go. Welcome.
Rachel Sennett!

High and a half.

God, thank God.

Clink, clank, Diet Coke. Clink, fucking clink.
And it's all the kinds of Diet Coke. We have the ones in the can, we have the ones in the bottle.

In the bottle, I wish I had can, but of course I went bottle because that was what was available

at the bodega. But I was like,

I'm straw. I'm strawing it, and it's totally fine.
Straw it. Now, tell us what was so fucked about that day.
Oh, my God.

So the other thing that's crazy is it's like, at that time, I was such a disaster. I was going through, it it was a tumultuous time.
Yeah. You know, 23.
Yeah.

And in my head, I was like, no one else knows that this is tumultuous for me.

I thought what I was presenting on the outside was like normal, grounded, had it together. And now it's like, I see people who have known me.
Yes. And they're like, you've really matured.

You, wow, you've really like, you know, you feel you've, you're a lot more grounded. And is that offensive? no yes yeah

i think it's like it's good because now looking back i'm like that was really scary not only was i crying i was like ripping poppers yeah

i was addicted to poppers and i was just sitting in the back room open sobbing it's like people were coming in and out i remember like sydney washington coming over and being like it's okay love all right get it together get it together get it together before this you gotta go on stage and rip a minute

so rip a minute just just wait rip a minute then rip a popper and then we'll put you in the Uber home. Let's go.
Wow.

See, that's community care because Matt was saying it was like, it was 50 people in the community just descending on you to show support, but also they were like, but we also have to get ready for a breakup.

But you do what we do have to do our best. We do have to do our best.
So please get it together, do your bit, and then either go home or just, you know, keep the crying to a minimum.

But it was like three

days

after,

and I was, I was raw.

I was really, really raw. And my, I don't think so, honey was, I don't think so, honey, breakups.
Yeah.

And say that. And I did it with tears in my eyes and poppers in my throat.
I was like, I was, yeah, that's how deep they were going. Oh, yeah, no, they were.

It was crazy. Yeah.

How did the pot, what was the first hit?

Who was your fucking Sherpa? So this is what happened is basically I did, it was around my birthday. Yeah.
And this is also around the time,

no, one year before was when I accosted you guys. Yeah.
We'll get to that in a second.

And because we all had raw vulnerable moments, we all, and that's again, what the community is for.

That's why we have each other's backs because we saw each other at the highest and the lowest.

100% tears everywhere. I walk in and I got family because you've seen it all.
Thank God.

But basically, it was like I had a small birthday party or whatever a couple days before the breakup and Moss, Periconi,

who we know and we love,

genius writer,

writing at SNL a couple of buildings away. Let's go.
I'm going to go say hi later today.

Moss was like, I just heard about paupers.

To get, by the way, to get introduced to pauper's by a straight man, come on. It's

one of our best straight man. Very of that time.

Very of that time. Very of that time.
Because things were mixing. It was like everyone was a little bit

dabbling into each other. We were like, what have you got going on over there?

So Moss was like, I just did poppers one time. We should buy them and like do them once tonight on your birthday for fun.
Okay. Oh, no.
Huge mistake. Oh, God.
He brings the poppers to the party.

We all do poppers, whatever. I'm like, that's kind of fun.
Yeah.

Then

the next day, do the breakup. Yep.
Oh, do the breakup. Do the breakup.
And

I immediately fall apart and I start looking for something. Something.
I go, what's here? At this point, I'm living with my dad in Hell's Kitchen. Me and my dad are roommates in Hell's Kitchen.

And Hell's Kitchen is what? The capital of Popper. The capital of Popper.
Potentially Real Coacher number 26. Hell's Kitchen is what? The capital of Poppers.
You can get them anywhere.

You can get them

anywhere for $4.

Yep, not bad. For $4.

dollars and by the way impossible to get in la something new york has over la poppers is really true and i know a spot i know a place muna where you can get them and i'll tell you after although i don't think it will be there for you i moved on i moved on you're recovery

i've i've matured but i will say when i first moved to la i went to get poppers somewhere and i did i had to drive to like four places and i was like i ended up in like a sex shop at like two in the morning and they were like we have one bottle it left it was like it was crazy it was crazy so i so okay i'm searching i'm searching through my dad's apartment it's like there's nothing there except for the poppers boom i just start

i just start taking them and i'm taking them like in the morning i'm taking them like 10 times a day. I do think there's a piece of my brain missing from that time.
It's like I'm taking them raw.

I remember Catherine Cohen. Yes.
We went to like breakfast breakfast the next day because she was being an amazing friend. She was being there for me.
And I was like ripping poppers at Cafe Clooney.

And she was like,

my love, you got to stop. My love.
You got to put those down. Save it for right after.
She also poured me a glass of vodka and watered it down at like 10 in the morning. I love Catherine.

I literally can picture this. I can see the coat she's wearing.
Yes. Yeah.
You know, we got the coat. We know the flow.
We know the coat. It's fabulous.

And so then it was just from there, I just had them on me. And that was like my thing.
I was just like, I can always do a popper in five minutes. Sure.
And can I ask, what was the feeling?

Were you chasing a feeling or was it just like the pacifier? Like, let me just do my thing. It was a little pacifier.
I'm a total pacifier girl.

I always, it's like, I need a pacifier at any moment right now. How many vapes on set

on any given day on the set of I Love LA? You know what was crazy is they gave us fake vapes,

non-nicotine vapes.

And then we all started doing it. And I was like, it's really just about having a butt-pop.
Yeah, it's the places. It's like a toy.
It's a toy. It's like a, yep.

I just want something to hold and suck on and play. Okay.
Yeah. Yeah.

And, but, so then I just had them. I think what it was is that when I would take the poppers, I would start laughing so hard and then I would start crying.
And it was sort of my entryway into crying.

Wow. Okay.
So you were able to access. I was able to access how I was feeling.

Did you lose that access once you got off the poppers? You know what's crazy is,

no, I didn't, but I entered a period of my life. I would say the mid-20s, I was like,

I'm healed. Yeah.
Yes. I'm so healed.
I, because it was COVID. Right.
I moved to L.A. and I was like, I became like a hermit, honestly.
Yeah.

I went. all the other way.
I was just like, I'm like barely drinking. I'm not doing anything else.
Poppers Copper's on the east side, west side highway. No, no, none of that.

I'm like, I'm very, I'm very locked in.

Locked in.

And I think it was almost like I overcorrected. Do you know what I mean?

And then

came the Saturn Return. Of course.
Damn it. Which is when you ran into us on the street, by the way.
Which is, oh my God. Wait, no.
You guys on the street. Yep.
This, I'm backpedaling.

We need to back up. Okay.
This is, this is still a messy era. This is probably like the year before my full crash out.
This is like 2017. Yes, yes.
And I'm having a birthday. It's my birthday.
And I

was on Kat's show. Yes.
I'm like, yes, birthday. I come out of there wasted.
Yeah. I see Matt and Bowen outside on the street.
I don't realize they're having a deep discussion that involves

a tearful discussion. Was this at Union Hall?

I think it was at Club Coming. I think it was the Club Coming show.
Okay. Okay.
So if it was 2017 Club Coming, it was one thing. If it was 2018 Club Coming, it was Union Hall.
It was another thing.

Cause I can remember two times. But 2018 Club Coming also sounds vibrant.
It sounds all real, all like with

it. I'm willing to bet it was about both of us going through the SNL audition process and only one of us getting hired.

That's my suspicion. It might not be correct.
Saying it's about that, I feel like makes it seem like I was heartbroken about not getting the job. There's so many emotional things

in that, like in the friendship that it could have been about. But so I'll just say that.
It wasn't like me sobbing, like, you got SNL. No, no, no, and I don't mean to misrepresent that.

The vibe was literally like sweet, beautiful moment between friends talking through something. We have the,

it was, I need those. Do you know what I mean? And you came over like,

let's go.

Yeah, I literally was like, it's my birthday. How awesome was the show? Who wants to do shots?

You guys both turned to me, tears in your eyes. And you're like, could we just have a minute?

Just one minute. Because the fact is, we do want to do shots with

this.

But it was just, it was just like my vibe was so insane. And you guys were like, it was like, I was interrupting like a beautiful moment.
That was the vibe. It was.

It was like a beautiful moment of you guys connecting, talking through something, and me being like, shots, bitches.

One or two. Let's go.
Get inside. I love this girl.

I love this girl, though.

I think she's obviously still there. She's in the show.
She's Maya.

And there's a throwaway reference to like, remember when Maya was a dictator?

I caught that Jordan saying that to you in the show, like, Maya, this is like when you were doing this to Bombers. I was like, I was there for that.
And you were like, yep. Well, I remember.

Well, so basically, okay. So because

what I tried to do with the characters is, because like I was saying, I moved to LA and then I sort of like locked down and was sort of like Herman.

And I think that's when when I started to feel really isolated. I felt like I, yeah, I had trouble like driving and like seeing friends in LA.

And I felt really alone and I was like really gripping to control. It's so different from New York too, where it's like you can go to a fucking bellhouse show with 50 people and they can get

you and they can all gonna be there for you and they get it. Whereas then you go to LA and it's like, that's not how it is.
No, and then it's at 3 p.m.

and you're alone in your apartment and you're like, who am I?

What's going on? So then basically my Saturn return came, and I felt like my Saturn Return was basically like all the lessons from my early 20s coming back, punching me in the face.

And I got like messy again in a more elevated way, in a more fun adult, more mature way. Elevated Messi, front runner for the title of that.

But elevated Messi. But I think, so what I kind of tried to do with Maya and Tallulah is Tallulah is sort of a representation of like me in my early 20s 20s in New York.

Maya is kind of that like control freak tendency, me like mid,

like 26, 27 in LA. And then together they are better because I, what I'm hoping,

what I'm hoping is that now I'm a more evolved person where I have a little bit more balance,

a little bit more freedom, intuition, and I can have fun, but I'm, but I'm not completely out of control disaster mess yeah you are you are representing in these two characters apollo dionysus yeah that's it oh apollo wants order dionysus wants hedonism and fun yeah

he wants poppers dionysus wants poppers desperately it's actually real coacher number two dionysus wants poppers desperately i have to connect with you about the poppers thing because i too was addicted to them right because i'm i'm thinking of like imagine a world yeah where not only was all those things true but also it was tied to sex i couldn't even that would be crazy.

I don't think you'd be here. I don't think

I'm almost not here. It's crazy.
When you are like a bottom and you need them to take dick, like it becomes a thing where I was in a relationship one time where we're having sex all the time.

It was short-lived, but I was using poppers all the time. Yes.
And so when we broke up, it was not only a thing of like, I enjoy them and they get me off, but also it's sort of like

me back a little bit.

And I didn't realize that I had grown dependent. Oh, yeah.
And when I tell you, like, never been, it was a thing I talked to my therapist about for like almost a year.

And she would actually ask at the top of sessions, like, how are you doing with this? And I was like, oh, my God.

And it was the only thing I would have like the urge to, Sabrina Carpenter, lie to my therapist about. Yeah.
Because I was like, this is humiliating. Yeah.

Because what it literally is, is you're huffing. You're huffing.
You're huffing.

It's like, it's literally, it's like when you're like a kid and you're in dare and they're teaching you about the things you can get addicted to, you're like, well, that's the lamest one.

Yeah, you're like, that?

That's not going to be me. Huffing,

huffing glue. And then there you are with avalonitrate trying to get dilated.
Yep. Or go to a Robin concert and enjoy dancing on my own more.
Oh my God. Which we also

did.

But there was a time when it got dangerously in the fabric of like social stuff. Yes.

Once you connect it, that's the, with any addiction as soon as you've connected it, you form the little wire in your brain.

It's like, well, we're not coming back from this.

It's like, now I'm remembering my ex. Now it's, I'm, it's connected to that.
It's like, what? It's very, very, very connected to sex in the gay community. And also like, it is just a little social.

Yes. Like, I remember one time we had Trixie Mattel on the show, and she was like, do you guys use poppers recreationally? And we were like, yeah.
And she was like, what?

And now I'm kind of like seeing that perspective because it is a little bit like,

get off, do your thing, or go off, get off and go off and get off.

But like, it is a little bit like to have it around all the time. It's like, there are holes in your brain.

There's holes in my brain for sure. But

it hasn't held you back. Hasn't held me back.

I can feel the wind going through the holes. They're like,

it's like Swiss cheese.

That's how I get all my ideas.

Yeah. You have the holes in my brain.

Wait, was this the frequency? Yeah. The frequencies are

throwing.

Was you moving to LA permanently? Was that the same time as Come On its LA? Or was that before? That was before. Come on, it's LA was just a trip that you took.

Come on, it's LA was a trip that I took. And I, I, I did a little water bottle tour.
This is pre-COVID. Yeah.

And I felt

completely lost there. I was sort of like, what are these meetings? What's going on?

And everyone was like, you're not supposed to like pitch anything hard you just are supposed to like give people a sense of who you are yeah so then I would show up to these meetings and you would see the like person that I was meeting with like read the email about who I was and they would go like yes Rachel so you're a slut on Twitter

who what's going on

and then I would just go into all these meetings and like talk about how like a mess my life was and everyone's like oh my god girl that is so funny okay call us when you want to do

a show about a sentence or something. No, this is what they would do.

I would talk for like 45 minutes, and then they would be like, Okay, so on our slate, what we have is we are doing a remake of brats

and we uh whatever. And they're like, and just come to us with one sentence, and that's how we like to develop.
Then I leave, I never hear from any of them again. No, never, never again.

So, I was just coming back from like a week of that being like, I feel crazy and stupid and everyone there like hates me, whatever.

And I feel

like

I

just, I was just joking around with my boyfriend at the time and being silly. And then we made that video.
But like, I mean, I'm sure you've been asked this.

And I want to ask what you're sick of being asked on this fucking press run. So far, nothing.
Really? That's great. I can't think of,

let me think a little, but nothing.

I came in today being like, I'm going to ask her about Kamana Telley just like briefly, but I feel like, I mean, gaggy that that's like prophetic, that like that, that that ended up being like, yeah.

No, it was kind of crazy. I was like, I didn't really, but you know how they say time is always happening at the same time.
Yeah, like right now we're at the bell house. Flat circle vibes.

We're at the bell house. We're at the bell house.
And I feel like we're also 90 in the nursing home. Yeah.

Oh my God. That's going to be a good conversation, too.
I can't wait.

Potting for no one. Wait, we have to be at the same house.

They need to put us in the same nursing home. That's why I said past, present, and future.
That is exactly what I meant. Us in the nursing hall.
Us in the nursing home.

But MPTF, like this fundraiser thing that like they throw every year around the Emmys, that is literally a nursing home for actors. I can't wait for us to

go there. We have to go.
Lena Dunham told us about it. And it's like they do like pottery hours.
They literally do like for old actors. Oh, wow.
People on TV and film.

Like that's actually our poetry hour. That's so beautiful.
I can't wait till it's our whole friend group there.

Catherine and the same code. We're all looking at the pottery wheel.
You reaching for the poppers, Catherine? Like, no, put those away. Slapping my kid away.

I'm like, it's almost over. Just let me have one.

It's almost over. Oh, no.
When we're 90, forget. Forget about it.
I'm weeping again. Yeah, we're done.
We're done. We're done.
Wait. So, so, okay, time is a flat circle.
No, no, no. You were going.

Oh, no, no. It was, but yes, it felt almost prophetic.
Yes.

Yes. But that was before I moved to LA.
And then I moved during COVID. Yeah.
But bitch, now look at you. This is a show that is like on HBO and it's not a fucking sentence premise.

You know what I mean? It's like, that's gaggy. It's at least three sentences.

It is at least three sentences. And

if they kept saying, give me one log line, that's one sentence. I was like, I can't.

It's minimum four. Also, they wouldn't want that anyway.
Yeah,

you got to have a lot of sentence. That's an exact being told that's what you ask.
What you ask. They say, give me one sentence.
I go, I can't. I talk.
I ramble. Yeah.
I can't talk that short.

I can't talk that short. I can't talk that short.
No. Like a sentence can be like infinitely long.
Yes, comma, comma, comma, comma, comma.

People figure out about how many commas actually are permissible in a sentence. The answer would shock you.
12, 13. 12, 15.
Yes, even if you're not. I can comma.

If you're doing a list in the sentence,

fine. Get away with it.
M-dash, what is AI? Parentheses. Yeah.

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Are you a moon person? Um, I dabble. I'm like sort of dabbling.
I'm definitely astrology. I'm definitely

psychic. Yes.
Yes.

I want to ask you guys, do you like, what was your Saturn Return? Oh, well, that was part of what you were coming up on. Okay.
So our Saturn Return was

I would call mine brutal. Okay.
I would call mine brutal. And it also made me me go to LA.
But because I think

when you're like a New York fixture, it's kind of like, oh, when I'm running up against something at this age where it feels like my whole world is crashing and your whole world is New York, makes sense to leave New York.

And so then I went to LA and it was making me feel better about everything. And so.

Like when I was watching the first episode of I Love LA and it was like flashing around, like I saw like, you know, the little flash at AC Bar, the little, like, is it leaves of grass that you shot in in that one bar?

Tenants of the trees, tenants of the trees, yeah. Why did I say leaves of grass? That's so different.

Tenant, I saw tenants of the trees, I was like, oh my god, this is one of the bars that I went to when I first got there. Like, it reminded me of like, not to be like this, but like LA pre-COVID.

Yeah. And because now there's a lot about LA that's like kind of lost that thing that I felt like were so fun for me when I first got there.

But I am happy to say there have been permits filed to save the Arclight. Did you see this? Like the Arc Light might come back.
I love that.

And even just that is like, like, I remember they closed like an oil can Harry's. Yeah.

And I was just like, ugh, like these little things that I, you know, not in totality, it's like, it feels like maybe, oh yeah, that place left.

Like, but when you lose a bunch of those things, it hurts. And so it feels like watching your show, I was like, oh my God, yeah, there's like so much to love about LA.

There's like, there's that spot, that spot, like this energy. Yeah.

And so that's what I like really liked about it is it was like taking me back to like a time that I was like, oh, even though it's like when you're making a show about it in LA, you're inherently dragging LA a little bit because that's what you do when you love something.

Yes.

It was like, it felt like

the really positive, like beautiful parts of it were so present in that first. Yeah.

And I think like it's,

I also feel like, cause I moved to LA during COVID. So I was never there for that pre-part.
And I feel like I, when I first moved there, I had such a hard time.

And it was like everything was closed and whatever.

But I feel like it's felt, it's been so special to like put down roots and feel more and more at home there as like, I think new things pop up and like things like reopen or things like the Arclight or whatever or the Vista.

Like I love going to the Vista. And it's like, that's such an a little community spot now.
It's like people are waiting outside to go see movies there.

Like it's it's really, really cool. In the show, Jordan lives in Weho, right?

In the show, he lives. He goes out in Weho a lot.
He lives in Silverlake, but he used, you'll see later. Okay, he used to live in Weho.
Okay, so that comes up.

So the Weho of it all is like, whenever friends come and they're like, decide to move to Weho, I'm like, okay. Okay.
Because I'm just thinking, like, what do you think it is? What do you think it is?

Because it's kind of like a gay theme park there for a second. Yeah.
But then like housing options, though. There's a lot of like units.
Yes.

And I'm not going to talk shit about Weho because it's so boring, but I will say that like what was

great about it. Yeah, it's boring to talk shit about it.
What was great about it when I got there, I was like going out to like high tops and like on Santa Monica Boulevard.

And this was back when we had pump. Not that I was going to pump, but it was fun to see people.
You just wanted the option to go to pump. You could say it even as a joke.

I want the option to go to pump. It's really culture number 10.
I want the option to go to pump. And it was just like, I don't know, there was something really fun about it.
And then COVID happened.

And that also kind of like changed it. And now it's like a lot of short girls stealing phones.
We've never caught them. Never.

I'm a short girl. And you know, I'm going to steal a phone.

I'll take it. It's a legend that it's like some short girls stealing phones because the phone theft there is like really crazy.
Oh my God.

But yeah, even like the Weehoe of it all, like that was what I did when I first got there. Yeah.
I was like interested to see what you guys explore in terms of Weeho in the show. We get there.

We get to Weeho. Yeah.
There's a Weeho moment. I feel like this is the first LA show in a while, or maybe ever, that's like actually honest about.

I mean, like, it's even a throwaway line in the pilot where you're just like, it's really isolating here. Yeah.
And like, I think that's just, that's the sentence.

That's not for there to be a sentence for the show, but that is the sentence. It is, it is, I think, like, you can feel, it's very easy.

And this is something that I actually have come to love about LA. In New York, like, you go outside, stuff like it's happening, it's happening, stuff comes to you.

And I think I'm someone who in my life, like

not to say I was ever like a passive person, but I sort of sometimes felt like life was like taking me and making things happen and I was out of control of it. Yeah.

And I think in LA, it forces you to be a little bit more of an active member in your own life and like not make yourself like the victim of like, for a while, I was like, no one wants to hang out with with me.

No one's my friend. Like everybody hates me.
It's like,

bitch, text and make a plan. Make a fucking plan.
Get in your car, even though you hate driving, get in the RAV4 and go and make a plan and find your friends and build your community here. Yeah.

And like, I think that changed me in like a really positive way. Yeah.

Because I was so committed to like, I think I was just so stubborn and like, well, like, I had, I had all these rules of like, I can't go out at night because I have a dinner three days from now.

And I, if I eat, if I drink, like so controlling of myself, and I was like, never having any fun. And I think I also was like, if I want to be successful, I can't enjoy life.

Like, enjoyment is what happens after I achieve something.

And then I get to enjoy life for two days. And then I have to achieve something else.
And that was sort of like my mindset.

And then I think, like, honestly, making the show changed my mindset a lot too, because I was like, wait a second, I'm going to be working hard

on this for a long time. And I remember their sweat tour was happening in LA and it was like one of my first couple of weeks.

like in the room and I was on a walk with Molly and she was like, we have to go to sweat tour. And I was like, I know, but I just, I have to be taken seriously.

And I, I can't like, I just can't go out until like, she was like, till when? I was like, until the show comes out. And she was like,

she was literally, she literally goes, my love, you need to experience life if you're going to be able to write stuff.

You're coming to sweat tour. Best night of my life.
Yeah. A hundred times.
Best night of my life. See, and you know, you were working and didn't come to sweat tour.
And you should have gone on.

I had the mirror version in New York. Yeah.
Because it was like the first day of work last season. And I was like, I can't.
He texted and he was like, I don't think I can come. I was like, no, do you.

Your energy is important. And literally that night, I remember it was like one of those things.

It was like something about like Charlie and Troya and that show in particular, which was one of the best concerts I've been to, unlocked. And I did, it was like a weekday.

And I did stay out till three, slept with somebody, woke up at his home. And in the morning, I woke up and I went to him.

And I was like, you were wrong not to come, but you were also right not to come. I was ultimately wrong.
Because guess what? Guess what I was doing?

Literally writing an impression of Charlie XTX that was totally mid. And you're in a way.
It was great that you did that. But it was like, that was the irony of it.

But I was going to say when we were announcing Oscar Noms together, oh my God,

that was so funny. I love putting the music two together.
That was such like a love letter to like all of our

sleep over vibes.

Me and Bowen call time. 3 a.m.
3 a.m. call time.

It was like midnight call time.

Bowen had just flown in and were like there with the teleprompter trying to say, what was the name that I couldn't say?

Oh, wait, maybe we know. It was a French one.
No, we can say it. What was it? It was the name.
It was, it was the film. It was that film.
Un profete. No.
It was,

I always said un profette, and I was like, she rocks. What was the movie? It was like something.
It was like a Portuguese movie. No, it was Amelia Perez.
Yes. Amelia Perez.
Perez.

Because they were telling Rachel, it has to be Perez. Perez.
Perez. And then as soon as they said it, do you know as soon as someone like

corrects you, then every single time I was like, Amelia Perez.

Emilia Perez.

Amelia Perez.

And so then now when I'm at the teleprompter, I'm going, it's like you'll see it in the video. I'm like, Amelia Perez.

I remember we were watching it at home. Like me and the group chat, we're watching the gay group chat watching the Oscars.
We're like, wow, they're slaying the pronunciation.

And I remember, because we were all like, how many times are we going to hear Amelia Perez?

And we heard it a lot. And I said it every time.

I was like, can we give one to Bowen, please? Bowen is saying it seamlessly. Please, Let Bug, can we trade

can we please trade please i'm begging you and they wouldn't like change it on the prompter

no and every time it was like i would look to you before i said it i would be like and and you'd be like

time is over because i feel like we're there right now we're there right now what's this what it's gonna say is you were in the room you were in the room for i love la at like smacked out of the middle and i was gonna say i was like you were so relaxed and like it felt like i made a blocker i just assumed oh is it that no i actually didn't didn't that night that night i was just tired but i felt i actually genuine i felt calm being with you because i do think sometimes like things get crazy and then you see people that you knew when you were like 20 and you're like exactly i'm okay i'm okay i'm okay yeah but i was gonna say that like

i was gonna assume and this is just my bad it's like post bottoms it's like

you would never need to prove yourself again because that is something that you fucking did.

But of course, it's this thing where we have where it's like, well, like, we got to do it. Like, here we go.

We've proved ourselves quote unquote in ways before, but now we're like, oh, but gotta do it again to the next level. There, it never feels like enough.
We need to find,

we need to find self-worth and God.

And, and also, I think, like, this year, I was also like, you need to find

value in the making of the thing. Yes,

and your friends, and your family, and your relationships, because I worked on this for so long and I felt like a lot of pressure because this is the first thing that I made where it was like every step of the way

is announced. And that's the way that TV works.
You know, you get a pilot order, just the fact that you're writing something is announced. That's announced.

Then that gets picked up. announced again yep then you make go make that you edit that then if that doesn't get picked up people know right

it does get picked up casting people know the casting gets announced then you go make the show and at the by the time like you're actually getting to make the show it's like i'm posting a tick tock of me like drinking a coffee and everyone's like go work on your show mama you and i'm like no they were right

they're 12 and they're right what i also love was like they kept announcing like untitled rachel center project untitled rachel center

where i was like is it called that because for a second i was like i think it's called untitled rachel center project And I think it kind of rocks.

Call it whatever you want to call it. Because honestly, it's like, at this point, I'm like, it is.
We still in the office will be like, yeah, for the untitled Rachel Senator Joe.

Untitled Rachel Santa Joe. But it was just, I felt really vulnerable.
And so I think I had to change my mindset a little of, I can't punish myself

the entire time. that I'm doing this and not live life and whatever and see my friends.

And I also need to like enjoy the process of making this because it was one of the most like rewarding, creatively fulfilling things to get to do.

And I was like, and I can't freak out about the pressure. I'm freaking out about the pressure now or like at least one week ago.

But then I was like, it's okay to freak out now because it's too late. I already made it.
So it's, I can't change it, unfortunately. Picture's locked.
Picture's locked.

It's too late. Yeah.

But it's like, I think it helped, hopefully shift my mindset a little where I was like, I have to be able to, you have to find balance while you're working. Because guess what? Now,

I'm going to make the argument that time is linear because now going forward, you will always have had the experience of writing and starring and making your own movie and also writing and starring and making your own TV show.

Like that is something that no one can take away from you. And like, just, just go, go forth with that.
You know what I mean? Yeah. I'm going to, I'll text you being like can you see can you say

I think it's so it's good though to like I think admit that

you like are caring that much about every detail and that you are like low-key punishing yourself because sometimes it can feel like whenever we're on the internet or whatever like Perception is not always reality.

Like, you know, who fucking is like one of the hardest working people ever is Charlie. Yes.
But her image is, I'm partying. Like Dua Lipa, always on vacation.
You go to her show.

She's working so hard.

So it's not like, I think people can get caught up in the image of things and not understand like how much is going into it. And like there is,

you can clearly find a balance because there are people that are doing it. Those people are exhausted.
Yeah. But, but it can be done.
Yeah. Yeah.

The sweat tour was literally created by someone who's like, yeah,

like Sauvignon Blue in the air, fucking cigarette, sunglasses at night. Let's fucking go.
But the thing is, like, so, so, so, so, so, so, so many hours of work. Yes.
Day in and day out.

Yeah, it's, it's both things. Yeah.
It's holding both things. It's holding both things.
You know what stuck with me? I was on shrooms when I was watching Gaga do mayhem tour. Oh, yeah.
Mayhem ball.

She goes, incredible. Incredible.

Just the best. I wish I could go.
I missed it. Come to Tokyo.
Come to Tokyo with us. Come to Tokyo with us.
Tokyo. She goes,

I just want to say, I care so much that you guys have a good time tonight. Love that.
That is like entertainership. Yes.
That's it. Yes.
Exactly. And that's what it's about.

It's like, I want you to, depending on who, what, who the performer is, but it's like, I want you to laugh. I want you to get horny.
I want you to cry a little bit. I want you to feel shit.

And I want you to have fun. Like, I want you to have a good fucking time.
Yeah.

It's, it's kind of fascinating too, because, like, tell me how you feel about this, but coming from like where we came from like very much like I don't I don't know if you would identify with this like but I'll just say the three words Brooklyn alt comedy.

You know what I mean? Like identify. Yeah.
I think that's identifying.

Oh, yeah, we did. Yeah.
We've gone Google for that. Yeah, call it out.

So, but I feel like the thing that is encouraged when we were all developing was like, be yourself, be authentic, share the story, go out there and say and do whatever the fuck, say that like dangerous thing, et cetera.

Yeah, and then you do get to a certain point where it becomes oh, are you gonna say that? Are you sure? Yeah, and you're like, but that's the basis of why

we did. Yeah,

and so it becomes this rub between authenticity and like going for it. Yes, and also it's it's this thing of like, I know what makes me is the messiness.
And then suddenly there I am on a red carpet.

Yeah. And you're like, huh.
And I think we all have like varying degrees of that. Yes.
But that is like an interesting place to find yourself. Yeah.

Because then you walk into the room where you once had a general and they're like, yeah, one sentence or else we're forgetting about you now. You go to that same place.

Here's the keys to your own fucking nice car. And we're not giving out a lot of cars.

In fact, we're giving out one car. One car.
And you can drive it. Yeah.
And

drive it however you want. Yeah.
Crash it. Crash it.
Crash it. But like, that's.
a crazy change in expectation and responsibility. Yeah, totally.
Totally. It's like, it's a wild thing.

But I had an inadvertent like Shiva baby night reunion on Sunday watching I Love LA. And then I was just stoned out of my mind.
I was like, I didn't get to watch OHI. And so I put on Ohio.

I fucking loved it. Yeah.
Well, she's like, Molly is amazing. Yeah.
Everyone. And the range that she has, like, yeah.
But that is, that is a tough movie for both her and Logan to watch.

Where they both have to see

Logan's amazing I never met him but he's he's he's such a star a darling darling as fuck yeah oh what a what a what a nice young man I know I love when people are nice too me too wait I

also feel

our group our like whole group whatever like I feel like we all

graduated. I feel like there was like maybe a mental illness period of speaking on behalf of myself where it felt like, oh my God, what are we doing?

And now, but I do do feel there's like i don't know i feel like everyone's a lot more grounded and like we have balance and everyone's like doing their thing and it's really cool well you were right though about the crying because i remember like like how it's like you see like people that it's just easier to cry with them because you're just you just are reminded of a more emotionally rounded thing i remember i went to um george severus's wedding and i hadn't seen io in a long time

and io and i ended up crying together on the street and i was just like about for different things george is like for me

no and then we are like no are you crying because you're happy i was like i think earlier yes i did shed some tears because i was happy for george but like now it's about something else now something else but it's like when you reconnect with people that like you know you saw in a different way it's like a lot of it is pride a lot of it is like wow you know it's crazy to think of how much has passed.

A lot of it is filling people in on what's gone on.

But like, there is a safety and comfort there in doing it with people that like you know are good people because you've seen them and they've had a lot of the same friends for a long time which is a huge indicator of someone being like really genuine and not having actually changed yes generally

you keep your you keep your core crew you keep your core you keep your core crew must on and seeing like jordan at the premiere and benny yeah

just every mom like it was just it was a perfect like sunday was so amazing because it was like charlie posting about like the show i was just yeah i I felt so, I felt so much support from friends in the community where I was like, I don't know, I think, I think like, I know other generations have done this, but I do feel like what I really feel like our generation, our grade,

our grade has done really well.

We were all in high school together is like, is like actually genuinely supporting each other and like having each other's backs, which I think is like not rare, but I think it's it's really nice.

It's not a given.

It's not a given. No, it's not.
And like I was just telling before we started that I was back in one of the theaters that we used to hang out in a lot. And you can tell it's different.

Things are more expensive.

Like certain venues are owned by like corporations. It's harder to just book things.

Tickets to shows are way more expensive. It's not as easy to community.

And I was actually like sort of mourning that the other night after the show, having a drink with our friend Amanda, who just moved back to New York and is like, you know, it's interesting because I moved back here.

Part of me was like, oh, I want to like connect to that community again and it's harder. And we were sort of like mourning that.
And then we were like, I guess it's up to us to

reignite.

Cause we could all just sit back and say, like, oh, isn't it a shame? Yeah. But meanwhile, that had been the one show I was at all month.
Like,

and it does take a certain amount of energy that you, you know, of course, have less of as you get older and like can stay in and like are told by the phone to stay in or, you know, things just get easier.

Yeah. But if you want to change something, you do have to be the one that changes it.
Yes, totally. Like it's not, it's, you can be like, oh, I wish there was more stuff or blah, blah, blah.

Or you could be like, let's do it and make it happen. Like, I also feel like whenever I like push myself to go out or do something or try something like that, I never regret it.
No.

Except for sometimes, but

when you're like, I should have said what I'm saying. But for the most part, you're like, okay, I need to like, especially to when you haven't seen people in a second or whatever.

Were you doing the show that you went to or you're just I hosted it. I hosted it.
And so it was game show. It was like a show that I used to do all the time.
And now we do it like twice a year. Yeah.

But it's like, it, it, it's, and it is like a community driven show. And like, it's like people were there and like, it felt great.
Yeah.

But I was just saying like, it just doesn't happen that much and then not that you feel old but you sort of feel like oh did I like did I just grow out of what that was or did I in some way I don't know why the guilt creeps in but like abandon that or like did I not do a good enough job of staying connected but then it's like what you're saying we were just in high school yeah and graduated yes we're at that age now where we're like oh yeah back in my day back in my day but the other thing too is I'm like we show up to the open mics and we scare the kids I know right?

It's like,

can I do three minutes?

Like, it's like, because I also feel like there must, there is definitely like a like Union Hall is still happening. Yeah.
I feel like I see cool shows and stuff going on there.

Yeah. Which is cool.
Probably the, like. The 20-year-olds right now are listening to this.
They're like, uh-huh. And they don't know about like

Beebo B-B's.

Beebleby Bees. Underground Swat.
It's so good. And

they're so old and they don't know.

We were at over the eight. We're at fucking Muchmore is like giving out

a lot of stuff. I think Muchmore is just like a nice restaurant now.

I walked by and there were candles on the table. And I was like, this doesn't feel right at all.
I'm missing a new dirty couch. It needs five dirty couches.
Where is the well liquor?

We need the bad shit in my car. Yes.

It's not a flat Brooklyn lager. Yes.
It's not a Brooklyn comedy.

Like literally, oh, God. The Brooklyn,

if I could describe the taste of my 20s, it is a flat

Brooklyn lager. 100%.
Mine's a Vodka Crane. Vodka Crown.
Mine's.

You're going to kill me. Whiskey sour? Whiskey sour? Who the fuck was I? I love that.

We were just coming off as Mad Men.

Yeah. Like, I was a bourbon guy, and it made me sad.
Hey, hey, hey, 20s. 20s.

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I'm wondering, what are you gonna wait? Go, go. No, no, I was gonna take this in a one place.
I was gonna say, we still didn't do you did your Saturn return of moving to

what was your Saturn return? I think this is my Saturn return. Imagine like large, big, huge

pizza. Let's say

my standard return was like big dollop and it's it's still being spread out like i feel like my standard return started at 28 and it's kind of still going okay it lasts longer than people realize yeah i think it also varies person to person do you know what i mean i've had like beats of it okay like i think shooting wicked going back and forth like having a full mental breakdown was like that was one during during the filming during the filming because you were filming and doing snl at the same time because i was filming and doing snl at the same time and like psychotic well but worth it worth it but also one in the movie great on the show oh you should see the little girls the little girl

but even like

even that was just like oh my god like i'm basically like flying back because i'm like furniture in this movie you know what i mean it's like they need me in the shop because like you know what we shot with you know oh we just we saw your elbow like yeah last month so you need to come back you know like it's it's that was the locus of it i think starting SNL was like truly like dissociative.

Yeah. And now, as it's like slowly petering now, settling.
Yes. Oh, now I'm like reflecting all of it and it's all coming back to me now.
You're processing. I'm processing.
I think like,

no, like, I'll tell you, like, I'm like, it's still happening. It's still crazy.
No. No.
35. Not at all.
Still happening. Not at all.

I think also, like, I think that like it could, the main events could have happened,

but the waves of things the ramifications my new favorite word ramifications i love ramifications the ramifications i want to release an album called the ramifications of you just the letter you and it's me like it's like late 90s r b and it's me just like this and it's called the ramifications of you oh my god wow i love the word ramifications i'm buying it i'm buying i'm buying but continue but i do one i have to say it is crazy hearing you say that about wicked because it's like I feel like you're such an important character.

But when a movie is that cinematic and big and there's so many characters, I've been in stuff, anything with like an ensemble cast. Yeah, it is so crazy because it's like

you do your scenes, but so much of it is like, it's like, you walked backwards and through this. You're in the back of the frame and you're texting.

And so then you're there for like a 15-hour day in the background like this. Yeah.
And it doesn't matter who you you are. Wait, you're so good.
It's like, it happens where you're in.

It's part of the job. It's totally part of the job.
And by the way, it's like, it's not, it's, it's like, there are way harder things to do. Of course.

But I think it's like when you get into the world of making something and then, especially when you're flying back and forth, it just messes with your head a little where you're like, wait, but what should I be doing?

And then there's days where you think they need you and then they don't. And then you just start to feel a little kooky.
Kooky kooky. Yes.
Yeah. I am also wondering, like,

what excuse are we going to have as we go into like our late 30s when bad shit happens to us and we're going through it? Like, uh-huh. Well, this isn't my son in returns.
You know what I mean?

Yeah, you know. So this is just life.
This is just going through my, like, when we all go through our first divorces, we're going to be like, well, this is just our first divorce. No.

You know, I'm saying, just in theory. I really don't want to.

I've never even, I've never even interacted with the idea an equivalent of my first divorce and now that it's in my head I'm like oh my first divorce

I do know what you mean is that it's like life I think when when

you're younger it's sort of like glamorous when things are like a kind of a disaster and then as you get older you're like

okay time it's like there's a disaster and now I have to go to my job you know what I mean

I think we might be less

as we get older we may be less invested in the things that would have devastated us earlier

so for example like i was saying before we started like oh like there was this event and i don't think i was invited to it and i think maybe three years ago i would have been like why didn't i get invited to this thing or i like does it does it mean something about like where i'm at or whatever and then i'm kind of was just saying to myself you know matt you're invited to a lot of things you you probably didn't even did you actually want to go to this thing

the answer was no And then I was like, also,

it is a choice to spin out about something like that,

which actually does not matter. It does not matter.

Like, and then I do think that the sad and return of it all is just really what it is, is it's like the settling into of adulthood, the realizing that you are an adult and there is no going back into

And there's that like few year period where you're filtering through what actually matters. And then you land on the other side of that.
And that's actually the end of the Saturn Return.

So we can talk about it being like planetary and whatever and astrological, but really what it is, is it's sort of like your first midlife crisis. Yeah.
It's like an adulthood crisis.

Adulthood crisis. Which I think the millennial generation and the Gen Z generation like all interacts with in a similar way because we're given similar responsibilities.

and we're given similar deterrence in terms of success. Yeah.
And we've all got like the internet in this way. Like they weren't, we, we started calling it the Saturn Return.

What it really is, is like, it's a way to say like, hey, we're all like engaging with becoming adults in a way that's been different from everyone else. Yes, totally.

And, you know, suddenly we're 28 and you realize you're not 25. Yeah.
And then you're 33 and you're realizing you're not 30.

And so that's, I think, you know what I mean? Like, it's just like, it's like a quarter life crisis. Yes, totally.
You totally.

Did I tear? Yeah. Well,

occasionally. Often.
You did. You did.

Because also, switching to water for the first time, by the way, I realized I chugged this whole Diet Coke and then I was like, I did see you sort of like start sipping the water about 10 minutes ago, and I saw in your eyes how thirsty you had been.

I know. I was like, so

I've been drinking, what is this called? Aspartine. Yes.
I've been, which I love aspartine.

Thank you for inventing it. Are you good at drinking water?

Yeah. Yeah.

Because I did Accutane. So when I did Accutene,

I was drinking, I was like hooked up to an IV. Basically, I was so dry, I would have to drink water every second.
I was reapplying Aquaphore. I was bleeding from my face.

And since I did Accutane, I actually like can't really drink that much.

You're still on it? No. But it changed.
Like, I used to drink so much more before Accutane. And I don't know what it did.
Damaged my liver.

But I can't really drink the same. Or what happens? You just get drunk pretty quickly or you feel sick? I get drunk pretty quickly.

Like, I get like buzzed off of like a one drink and I also like get hungover almost like immediately. Do you know what I mean?

Like it's like if I have one cocktail, it's like drunk in 15 minutes, hungover in 30. Yeah.
So I'm like, is this worth it? Yeah. But I think it just, I was, it did something to me.

It really dried me out. And now I drink, I have to drink a lot of water too.

And I love peeing. Like, if I can pee, I'll pee whenever.
It feels incredible. It feels good.
It's like a free.

I like any of those like, like free little things that your body does.

Sneezing isn't. There's nothing like it.
It's free. It's a free break.
Yeah. Do you, can I ask? Yeah.

Sometimes are you like, I wish I could just do this standing up.

Peeing standing up? Yeah.

Because I got to tell you, it's really nice that we have the people with

me. I sit all the time.
I love to sit down.

I sit down every night.

At home, I sit when I pee. I guess I wish I could pee standing when I'm wearing like certain outfits.
Yeah.

Certain outfits I have. Like it's like, it's so funny when you go to like.
a glam event or whatever, but ultimately the bathrooms are like porter potties. Yeah.

And then you're in the tiner porter potty, like banging on the walls and like the dress. There's like three layers and you're like standing over it, trying to pee.

And it's that I'm like, it's like you're slip and sliding on the floor. Like, I'm like, standing could be fabulous right now.
Yeah. It's sometimes those fancy events that are the most bootleg

truly being held up by sticks. Yes.
But the picture is like fabulous.

You would never imagine what's happening just 10 feet away. Porter bodies.
We're going to try to write a sketch this week called The Bathroom Awards.

The bathroom awards. The bathroom awards.

The bathroom awards. Like best,

best think.

I love the one thing about LA is there'll be certain restaurants where they're like, and there's no rules here. I have amazing time, but you can't take a photo in the bathroom.
You know what I mean?

Like, have you ever interacted with this? Where it's just like, just no photos in the bathroom? What is that?

I don't know, but I'm like, if there's one place we should be able to take a photo, it's the bathroom away. It's the bathroom.
Clearly. And then I'm like,

touch-up time. Yes.

It's a holy space. And a good interior decorative will say the most important room to decorate in your house is the bathroom because it's where your guests will be alone.

It's the only place where your guests will be alone. Boom.
They'll snoop around. I wasn't gonna do, so I have an apartment in New York now and I wasn't gonna do my bathroom.

But then I was like, you know what? We have to do the bathroom because of that reason. And also it's just like, okay, also I have a bathroom with a bathtub.
Yep. I don't need it.

I'm ripping it out and I'm doing a walk-in shower. And I don't care if that decreases the value of it later.

My thing is just like, I don't want a bathtub I hate stepping over something because let me tell you what can what can and has happened yep to people in my life sometimes the bathroom gets hot and sometimes you get a little bit like overheated and then like you don't want to have to step over the bath no like you gotta like you need to be able to come right out I'm gonna tell you a story after this bathrooms are hazardous they're dangerous

to be easy

and they need to be aesthetically appealing because people need to have their eyes open. Yes, yes.
Bathrooms are dangerous.

I totally can have a hard time in a bathroom, like shower, like, especially like coming home from an event or something. You're like falling in the shower.
No. You've hit the J.
You've hit the J. Yes.

It's really,

basically, I agree. I will say there's something so fun about like the, I'm sorry.
Like when I used to pass out at chorus concerts on purpose for attention. At what concerts?

Chorus concerts in high school and

my god, you're

icing. Oh, every single one.
We're back in on this. Back in on that.
And they're picking you up. You go, I'm so embarrassed.

You're not. I'm so embarrassed.

Like, I love doing that. I love when I'm like, I'm trying to think of the last time I was like at a concert, probably like you were crying and you're like, you're going down on the plane.

Yes, and you're, and you're freaking out, and you're like, I just wish this wasn't happening right now. I'm so embarrassed.
Everyone goes, no, no, no, no, no, no, keep passing out. Pass out more.

Like, that's the best thing to do. I feel like

the.

I love that you passed out, of course.

I love it, always.

I'm seeing the rafters just like, ah,

I do pass out. I did once pass out on a family vacation and it was like so embarrassing.

And it was like, the other thing I did once on a family vacation was throw up three times in the van on the way to the airport because I was hungover.

And I threw up out the window, but then it blew back

and blew back into my sister's window.

And my whole family was like, my parents were like, everyone, everyone wanted to make fun of me.

And my parents were like, everyone needs to be nice to Rachel for the next like hour until she feels better. And then we can all shit on her.

That's really good. But we need to just take a second before we dunk on her because she's like,

she's shit. She can feel feeble and weak.
She's infirm. That's family management.
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Okay, speaking of dunking, we've arrived, and I don't think so, honey. Oh my god.
It is the moment. Back in the day, we used to do 50 of these a night.
Today we're going to do three.

Three. It's our minute to rant and rail against something in culture.
And I'm turning to Bahid and I'm asking him to do the thing we said we were going to do because mine is a little bit different.

Here we go. This is Matt Rogers.
I don't think so anyway.

I don't think so, any ASMR. It's not that I don't like it, it's just that I don't get it.
Is this sexual for you, or is it like soothing? And I wonder, am I even allowed to?

I don't think so, any of this, or are people that love ASMR like a protected class? No, yeah.

Okay, so then if this is true, then I'm excited to do this.

Ooh, tingles. I saw Lady Gaga and Catherine Zeta-Jones do this, and I was like, for something that seems kind of niche, these are two huge stars.

And they were promoting Wednesday, which feels very commercial. So I guess ASMR is commercial.

Are you obsessed? Like, I don't think Sawani, that I necessarily get it. I'm willing to learn.
But

is this something that I could have a career in? Because it feels like people do this like exclusively for money.

And I'm just really excited to explore and hear what you guys think i just don't think so honey that i get it is this horny is it soothing what is it what is a s m r i d t s h and that's one minute boom um and we're back to normal volume thank god i what how did you feel about it

i I feel like you, once you learn the conventions, once you learn the things to do, there's so you just did ASMR in a whisper. There's soft spoken.
Oh, so that's the thing.

What's soft soft spoken like this?

Soft spoken. It's just your phone aiding and you're not fully down here in the whisper.

Kaka was doing it like this. A lot of people defaulted the whisper, but Cardi B, she kind of had a viral W magazine

ASMR moment. She clearly knows her stuff.
Okay. So she was kind of going from the whisper into the soft spoken, I feel.
Autonomous sensory meriting response. Tingles.

You're into it.

I love. Oh, so you loved that what I just did.
So

I wouldn't say I loved it.

I just want to inform you that there is a really beautiful community out there. Okay.

Queen of Serene. I'm going to shout out Queen of Serene.
The mother of all ASMR, Gentle Whispering, Maria.

She, she basically invented the form. There's the woman who does the Alexander technique, who inadvertently does ASMR.
And that's an iconic. So you're pro-ASMR.
I'm not pro. I'm an enthusiast.
Okay.

Okay.

My gateway into this was Queen of Serene and Maria Gentle Whispering doing

towel folds. Okay.
Because she used to work as a housekeeper at a hotel. And also she does celebrity face tracing where she talks about,

she traces like Natalie Portman's face and talks about what movie she likes. Oh, it's like, it's a very cute.

It's not super, it is a little sexual because it has to be. Some people like do like,

you know,

gussy up a bit. I guess my thing is like when I'm hearing someone whisper to me, I can't help but make think it's a little sexual.
Yeah, you know what I mean? Are you with me on that? Yeah, I agree.

I see what you're saying. Yeah, it feels like it's like they're like, they keep being like, it's not sexual.

And I'm like,

don't make me feel like a pervert.

Is it or not? Because my thing is, like, if, if they're a protected class, people who like ASMR, I will respect it. Yeah.
They're not. My thing is just

they're not. But my thing is like, I just want to understand.

They're not. They're not.
I'm here as like as an enthusiast.

So you are, you're one of the people. You're part of the community and he's saying,

drag me. It's fine.
It's totally fine. Yeah.
Okay. Drag, drag me.
Well, I'm excited about getting into it. I don't think I could possibly get what you're getting out of it because I'm always

relax.

It makes me go like this.

When someone whispers in my ear, I'm like,

she does color analysis. That's the tingles.
Okay. Okay.
She does color analysis on celebrity. She has like, you know, like

the thing. She's really good.
I mean, that's my first foray into it. That's my.

That was a very good thing. I hope that people like it.
I hope people understand. Are you ready? I'm ready.
Okay.

This is Boen Yang's I don't think so, honey. His time starts now.
I don't think so, honey. We need to go back to buttons.
This, oh, this is so nice. Touch screens are

a toast. They're chopped.
Touch Touch screens suck. I don't ever want to see an iPad ever again.

I wanted to be a cash register on God as a child because they were pressing buttons, having a blast, beeping with the scanners. And now I'm buying four keyboards, thocking, thawking, creamy, creamy.

That's ASMR for you. My girl Maria also does keyboard ASMR.
30 seconds. There's no slime on the keyboards.
And then Thalk, Thalk, Thok does that.

That's called a Thalky button. I'm talking to everybody behind the camera here.
We all get it. We all, my gamer guys in the room,

up in this piece. Queens, we're going.
15 seconds. iPhone, iPad gaming, chopped.
It's all about the button press on the controller because guess what?

Connect, whatever PS, whatever, all the other camera stuff, it's not the same thing. I need to press the button to feel something.
That's what I'm going to attach. It's certainly not.

I'm going to get a plot for myself. I'm sorry.
To press the button than it is to do a that's you know what I mean I'm like wipe. I'm over it.
Can I tell? Yes. yeah it does feel really

so nice right i was saying sometimes like sometimes you're like you're so that is sexual freedom that is sexual freedom hitting your mind yeah this is the sound touch and sounds episode yeah you know that yeah yeah it reminds you of some reminds of something yeah of force which we don't do anymore i i feel like we've gotten worse at fucking because we don't do we don't do that we don't have buttons we don't have buttons literally you think you're worse at fucking because you're not

crazy tonight

light up the j and and push and push have you been lighting up the j i actually have i stopped lighting up the j for a couple years because i was getting paranoid but then i started bringing it back you're so back you got it you got it i'm so back as long as i do it with one person that i trust i'm okay just one person that you trust yes because actually if i do it alone scary two people scary one person that i trust safe

See, one person that I trust, sometimes like

halfway through, you start to worry you don't trust them. totally.
You're like, who are you?

Who are you? Or like one time I didn't know the person that well and he was like, come over, we'll smoke a J. And we smoked a J and I was like, oh, we're going to fuck.

I'm nervous about that. And I can't get out of my head about if we're going to fuck.

No, it has to be someone that you either know you're going to fuck and you fucked them before and you're in safe space or or like best friend, family. We know it's like not that.

Because here's the thing. Once I smoke a J, I start talking.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

King. And I don't hold back from the truth.
No. And I don't hold back any sort of, I am not someone who like tells gossip.
I'm like a lockbox. Until, but if I'm off the J, off the J, on the J.

On the Jay. If I'm on the Jay, I'm just

so it's like, I need to be with someone. So there's like three people maybe that I can smoke weed around.
That's, that's, that's self-aware. Yeah.
And if I'm alone,

it's bad because I just start like,

I just start like, I think maybe it's because I still live in the place that I live with my ex-boyfriend but I start like picking up a fork and being like who ate off this yeah like what happened I get freaked out by my you want you the history of

so do we count as one person that you could smoke weed with I could smoke weed with you guys I bet you but maybe I could only do you guys one-on-one

I think it's just because then I start to be like am I talking over everyone versus am I talking like I would be like I think I would I think it needs to be a a.

No, Rachel, what I want when I get stoned,

I go full non-verbal. You want someone else to talk? I want someone else to talk, which is where I come in.
But we would crush together. You would crush together.
You guys would crush together.

You guys would just probably sit and watch something. Oh, I would love that.
I was in the chat.

Yeah, you would talk third. Do you remember where the opening of Shrek? Oh, my God.
It's happening right now. Wow, I love it.

It's so good. I can't wait for the Dulak scene.

I love the Dulak. The Dulak scene is one of the great moments in culture.
She is wiping therapy. It's literally, it's actually what made Shrek a global phenomenon.

Dulak is, Dulak is,

Dulak is a perfect.

Wow, I really did like their keys. Do you know what's crazy is that movies for children? I continually watch them back and I'm like,

this is reflecting in our culture right now.

Dulak is, is the government right now? And I'm like, it's haunting.

Fairy godmother.

What Dulak is, is the government. Is the government? Is the government? What's that tolerant number 50? What duelock is, is the government.
It is. Rachel, it's time for your, I don't think so, honey.

Oh, it feels like old times. Oh, we're back.
This is, Rachel said it's, I don't think so, honey. Her time starts now.
I don't think so, honey, driving. Okay,

I should not be behind the wheel sober or anytime, ever. And you know what? I'm taking everybody off the road.
Yep. Here's what I'm cool with.
Walking. Yeah.
Bikes. Let's go.
Train. Totally fine.

Here's something else. Waymos, okay?

They just, nope. Oh.
They just found out a way for cars to drive themselves. And I think that's safer because I am in Los Angeles and nobody knows how to drive.
And if you want to drive in LA,

the only way to drive in LA is to break the rules. If you want to drive, you have to be turning on reds.
You got to be doing a left on a red if you want to drive.

You got to be speeding if you don't want to get hit from behind.

You got to be texting if you want to know where to go. So I just, you can't, you can't drive safely to drive at all.
To drive safely, you have to drive dangerously in LA. I get in car accidents

once a quarter and I'm sick of no more driving.

I did want to ask you about that because this is like, it is like, I think you're, you were on the carpet being like, yeah, I get into an accident a few months on my rachel. And not bad ones, though.

But they always happen to me because I follow the rules. Yeah.
I follow the rules and because of that, I'm always getting infender.

I put on my blinker. I look.
I turn, I go, I'm entering that lane. Can I get over there? By the way, I get stuck because people are breaking the rules.

Like I said, it says, don't take the left from 11 a.m. to 4 p.m.
People don't care. They're taking the left on the right.
So now I'm stuck behind you for 45 minutes.

I need to get over to that lane because I'm late for work. I have my job.
So then I'm putting on the blinker. And then I go, okay, I'm going over there.
And then someone speeds. Bam.
They hit me.

No, the aggressive people get their way on the road. I'm one of the things that I'm going to do.
And now it's technically my fault. No, you just.
That happened to me on Valentine's Day. Oh, God.
Yeah.

But you saying to drive safely is to drive dangerously. Wow.

Wow. And to drive dangerously is to drive safely.
Well, people have different schools of thought about this. There's like the defensive drivers who are like, I'm super careful.

I'll sometimes stop at like a green. Like, you know what I mean?

But then I'm like, yeah, but like, that's that, those are not the rules of the road. Those are not the rules of the road.

Defensive driving is not, and maybe I'm like, not necessarily getting the definition of defensive driving right, which is ultra careful. Yeah.

But which, which, in theory, sure, but those are not the rules of the road because green means go, babe. Green does not mean slow down.
Yes. Yellow means slow down.

There's sort of this like in-between way to drive that it's like we have the people over here and over there. It's like, look,

at this point, if it's like a yellow,

you need to like let

the people, you need to stop. If you're going straight,

if it's a yellow, you need to stop so that the people who are doing the left turn can do their left turn, but they're doing it a little bit on red.

But are you guys going to speed through and take the yellow light? Well, do you know about this? If you're making, so it depends. So I'm a little bit speed up on yellow.

Well, I'm speed up on yellow too, but at a certain point, you have to stop so that the people can do a left on red.

I think we can all make a gauge. They're going to take my license away.
No. By the way, I've done a full press tour where every day I go, I can't drive.
I close my eyes.

They're taking it away and they're revoking my license. Because guess what? You just like excavated the truth, but I have to ask you, if a Waymo is driving, isn't a Waymo driving safely? It is.

But then that's dangerous. No, but this is the thing.
If it's all

Waymo's, then there's no problems. Then there's no problem.
Unless the grid goes down.

You thought about that? We should just walk more. Yeah, I agree.
I, well, you know, when I first moved to LA, I was walking like from like Larchmont to Weho. I was like, I was everywhere.
Everywhere.

But you really, you quickly run out of gas on that. And my friends that move to LA now, and they're like, I'm going out every night.
I'm walking everywhere. I'm like, you've got three weeks on this.

Yeah.

Three weeks on this. But I mean, you're certainly going to get your steps because it's not a walking city.
Yeah. Like, you're not.

And something that looks like a normal distance that you would have done in New York

two hours and you're going over an underpass and you're like, this is interesting. This is are you driving a lot in the show? I am.
That's a lot. That's, that's got to be tough.
It's a drink. Yeah.

To drive, to drive. To drive.
But we do sometimes have that thing where they put the car on the other thing and they're dragging you. Yeah.
So you're just pretending to drive. That's my favorite.

Yeah. And I'm like,

how do you far away? Do you feel good? Do you feel good at that? Like, are you just like, oh, I can totally give it a little bit of a drink? Do you give like spontaneously like this? I give.

I almost give not looking at the road at all.

I'm so focused on checking the blinkers as an actor that it looks like I'm not looking at the road. I'm doing like way too much action.
It's like, just sit there. Yeah.
Just sit and deliver. I can't.

I'm like this.

No, you're being, no, you're being really professional about that.

Take through the box, the little whatever that thing is, the hole in the between. The hole.
Yeah. The hole in between the two car seats that you put your stuff in.

The cooking cup holder, the cup holder, but you, but you're doing the equivalent of like an actress going on set being like, it'd be funny if I was like opening in like a bottle or something, you know what I mean?

Yes, I'm guilty of that sometimes. Remember, it's so helpful.
I think a prop could be making a plate of spaghetti. What's my baby?

You're like, say the lines, say the fucking lines. Because now you're making a tuna sandwich for six more hours and we're all smelling it.
And Props has to reset the tuna.

You're thinking like a producer. Damn.
now i'm going in on multiple levels yeah like you have to

being a hollywood hot shop yeah you got to think of everything um okay well i love la is sundays at 10 30. by the way we love

a sunday show come on like chair company i love la

love

i was saying like this is the perfect great evening it's actually hilarious me and tim robins sit next to each other when they do the photos of me getting laser hair removal next to tim robinson i'm like my sister

It's like me like on the thing like this and Tim Robinson, like in a suit like,

and I'm like, yes, my girlfriend. HBO! HBO!

No other nigga.

Oh my gosh. To say we're proud of you is patronizing, but like.
It's not at all. It's exactly what I want to hear.
We're so proud of you. You've been fucking killing us.
I love you guys so much.

I literally, we need to, first of all, host the Oscars again. You need to join.

Guys, bring us back and we'll pronounce the names perfect. And

just literally, a joy to see you guys. I know.
This is so great. I'm so happy.
It's three safe people. We can all get stoned with each other.
Yes. And y'all, and y'all behind the scenes.

And y'all behind the scenes. And everyone

else, who I met this morning, but I trust.

They're trustworthy. It'd be a vibe.
All right. Well, we end every episode with a song.

Allelay.

I wish. And here's the thing.
Like,

it was called that, and it is in the first episode. And I was like, I realized I don't know any of the other words to this.
I just sniffed. But I do love I Love.
I love

Chris Jenner's version of it? Yes. Yes, of course.
That's how I first knew about it. To listen to that, stream the Chris Jenner version of I Love I love.
Please stream. Please stream Chris Jenner.

Bye. Bye.

Yay!

So good.

Lost Culture Reaches is the production by Will Farrell's Big Money Players and iHeartRadio Podcasts. Created and hosted by Matt Rogers and Bo and Yang.

Executive produced by Anna Hosnier and produced by Becca Ramos. Edited and mixed by Doug Bain.
And our music is by Henrik Smirsky.

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And what if your Wi-Fi had parental instincts built right in so your kids are always protected online? It's Wi-Fi that's not just smart, it's brilliant.

And during the holidays, that's a gift we all could use. Xfinity, imagine that.
Ever ask yourself, what am I capable of? Ford believes only you can answer that, even if others try to do it for you.

You're the one who defines your legacy, chases the horizon, engineers your dreams, conquers the curves. That capability, it's in you.

Just like it's built into every F-150, Bronco, Mustang, and every other Ford vehicle. Because whether you think you can or think you can't, you're right.
Ready? Set.

Ford. Visit Ford.com to learn more.
Okay, so you want your master's degree. You know you can earn it.
But life gets busy. The packed schedule, the late nights, and then there's the unexpected.

Well, American Public University was built for all of it. With monthly starts and no set login times, APU's 40-plus flexible online master's programs are designed to move move at the speed of life.

Start your master's journey today at apu.apus.edu. You want it? Come get it at APU.
Guess what?

It's the holiday season, and you know what that means. Holiday parties, well, holiday parties, they're the best, but there's always the stress of what to wear, what to bring.
Easy solution, okay?

Bring a bottle of Casamigos. Casamigos? Wow, that is the move.
You can make Casamigos mules. Or Casamigos espresso martinis.
Or Casamigos cram. And don't forget about Casamigos margaritas.

A Casamigos margarita is the perfect cocktail all year round. Casamigos is just the perfect gift that keeps on giving.
And as the saying goes, anything goes with my Casamigos.

On second thought, a holiday party might be in order. That's a great idea.
Please drink responsibly.

Imported by Casamigo Spirits Company, White Plains, New York, Casamigos tequila, 40% alcohol by volume. This is an iHeart podcast.

Guaranteed human.

"Elevated Messy" (w/ Rachel Sennott)

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Transcript

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