Side Stories: The Confession

October 01, 2025 1h 6m

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Henry & Eddie bring you this week's most brutal cases and wildest stories - but first, the boys head deep down the D4vd rabbit hole courtesy of The D4vd Files, THEN a fresh little Ep-date, this year's 31 for 31 list is revealed, 53 year old Albany man confesses in CBS station interview to killing & burying his parents in backyard as "act of mercy", California vigilante stalks and murders sex offender found online, Austin Yogurt Shop Murders solved, a very mean California squirrel charged in series of attacks, CTE plagued shooter attacks NFL midtown office, Listener E-Mails, and MORE!

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The thought of getting a degree can be straight up terrifying, we get it.

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There's no place to escape to.

This is the last podcast.

On the left.

Side stories?

That's when the cannibalism started.

Side stories.

Yes.

Oh, Eddie, I've been thinking recently.

Thank God.

Right?

Yeah, I'm real proud of you, buddy.

Yeah.

And I think about how

sad Dean Coral must be in hell that he never got to experience Roblox.

No, yeah.

Because think about it.

You know, like, Natalie and I had a bit of a conversation about this.

Love game.

Love gig.

I was talking about this with Natalie about how, like, obviously the times have changed, but largely some things are the same, right?

Like, kids are still getting to weird stuff their parents don't particularly understand.

It's just kind of the nature of it has changed, where it's like, it used to be, we had our generation, we had to be really, really careful about getting snatched up physically, right?

Like, we had to worry about a guy in a van.

Yeah, well, you had to worry about that.

I'm just saying, like, they let us loose in the world.

That's where you ran into pedophiles.

You ran into them just sort of like randomly on the street

at the the White House, like places that you go visit, right?

Like Boy Scouts of America, all these other places.

Football practice.

But you had to like...

Pretty much everywhere but theater.

Right?

And then you had to go to where the pedophiles were to be caught by them in a way.

Yeah.

You had to go to their webs.

Now they just get to just go on Discord and they got the pick of the litter of every child.

Damn.

Yeah, Discord is too confusing.

I have no idea how to use it.

Every time I do the seance for our Patreon, I like, for the first five minutes of me trying to figure out how to do it.

Michelle has to walk me through it each time.

Every single time.

And you know what that means?

We're safe.

Yes.

Welcome to Side Stories.

My name is Henry Sabrowski.

I'm sitting here with Ed Larson, and we have let the tech actually

get past us to keep us from being perverts.

We are actually incapable of seducing a child.

I couldn't groom a child if I wanted to because I don't know how to turn on the apps.

I don't know what Roblox is.

I've just seen the name.

I know that all this comes for, because obviously all this is coming up because Rob decided, because Rob's life.

I thought it was a Minecraft thing.

No, Minecraft is actually.

Minercraft.

See, that's what you do when you're fucking to make a baby you're going to molest.

Disgusting is a bad bad friend.

That is really bad, especially like in the first couple minutes.

No, we're past the point.

We're past the monetization point.

We're past.

I'm free.

But we, Rob, whose life is probably as desperate as mine,

sent me, like right before this, he got into a full DeForvid hole.

For those of you that don't know, we've been covering DeForvid,

I guess his real name.

It's David.

I forget what's his last name.

I couldn't possibly give a shit.

His performing name.

His name is DeForvid.

He goes by David, which is the worst performing name I've ever heard.

He is a quote-unquote musician that was found a dead body of his

right now alleged girlfriend, literally childfriend, Celeste Grievous, who seemed lovely, but she was anywhere between 13 and 15 years old.

And it seems that DeForvid, whose real name is David Anthony Burke, who actually was raised in a very, you know, lovely home.

Seemed like he was, all the pictures I've seen of him, he was in a closet.

But

that was his choice.

That was his choice.

That was the studio.

That was his studio.

That was the studio.

But he came from like a lot of money.

Yeah.

DeForvid was just some dude that started making songs when he was 15 about shit that didn't mean anything.

It wasn't real.

real but I do notice it's like that's why this is coming up in my head it was I was asking Natalie like DeForvid every one of his songs incredibly popular I don't know how I never heard of him before they found the body in the car and I

hundreds of millions of listens yeah I couldn't I can't explain it yeah he's so bad he's like a younger blood he's we're oh

he wishes he wishes but this guy like so now we know we did I watched two deep dives who did you send me?

One was...

Oh, there's like a guy named Turkey Tom or something.

Yeah, some other guy.

These like YouTube guys.

But they break down how DeForved

met his child bride through Roblox.

Bride is giving a lot of money.

Well, I guess they were going to get married after she turned 18.

So go ahead.

Yes, you're right.

Thank you.

And so they, they, that was like, you see these messages between him.

He starts to realize like, it's a bit of a long grooming process for DeForved.

He has many other, like, it seems as there are many other kids he was talking to at the same time.

And it was all through these anonymous video game chat boards.

Yeah.

He was talking to her apparently when she was 12 and he was 17 is when the conversation started.

That's when it started.

Again, I can't even imagine.

Like, what do you talk about?

I have no idea.

No idea.

And, but all of his songs shows you.

He's in a closet, I guess.

I guess.

But DeForved, everybody.

It's not a gay thing.

He was just like, every picture is him in a closet.

That was his childhood recording studio.

Yeah.

But DeForvid, we now know that her body was found in an abandoned Tesla not too far from his original home in Hollywood.

His Tesla.

His Tesla, DeForvid.

It was actually under his name.

It was at an impound center.

It was reeking.

They opened up the front trunk of the Tesla inside with Celeste Rivas that was dismembered.

There's a chunk of her definitely missing, we know.

We know that a chunk of her was missing.

She was very badly deformed.

And now we are seeing that DeForvid finally got his concerts canceled.

But you should watch this deep dive to really like, wow, he's so not talented that he literally couldn't even allegorically hint about killing his girlfriend.

Every one of his songs is about killing a lady and dismembering her and putting her somewhere.

But he does it sexy so the girls like it.

He has a song called Celeste.

Yeah, that he it went unreleased, quote unquote, but it definitely puts them together.

We also now know.

Romantic homicide.

But also, guess what?

We also now know that there was a misinformation put out.

Remember, we talked about how they had matching shush tattoos.

Well,

it's conflicting on either thing that I saw.

One of them said they both had shush.

The other one said that she had DeForvid.

She had DeForvid on her finger.

On her forefinger.

On her forefinger, and he had shush.

So his is multi-use

and hers is just for DeForvid.

And then every also what this deep dive showed me was that every single girl in his music videos was styled to look just like Celeste and then cut to the live stream that DeForvid did with Celeste when she made a funny quote-unquote funny joke about him quote unquote raping her and then he had to make a funny thing how oh we're gonna get canceled we got to shut off our stream like it was this big funny joke because he had already brought his crew into this world.

Like DeForvid was already telling everybody and every, it was already well, well known that he was dating a 15-year-old.

He said that he had media trained her.

Yes.

Like he, by the way, he is only going to get locked up for all of her, everything he said publicly.

Yes.

You know, and the police honestly really don't have to do much because the internet is like, here's everything he said.

Here's all the Discords.

Here's everything.

The problem, though, is that does that not also one of the worst parts about that is getting the internet involved in these cases because they also fuck everything up.

Oh, okay.

And they bring a bunch.

And then like half the stuff gets thrown out because idiots on the internet think they know everything.

And they think that it's like, no, you're just seeing what they put on the fucking internet.

You have to remember that, too.

You're just getting what they are allowing you to see.

So this, but we all know that DeForvid isn't J.

Edgar Hoover, right?

DeForvid's quite bad at covering up his crimes.

And I think that DeForvid is soon going to be singing for a supper in jail.

Proud to see, though.

It's all legit, right?

It's all all legend still.

They're saying that there are a lot of people in DeForvid's circle that also could have committed this crime and hid the body in his car.

Very much.

Who had access to his car and knew her.

So it could have also people are, you know, they want to do a toxicology test to see if maybe she OD'd and then they tried to hide the body after she OD'd.

We know that she's now, she went missing several times.

She went running away with DeForvid a couple of times and then returned.

And so there's actually also some talk that the family knew.

that this was happening.

And it seems that he was paying her off that, and that money seemed to trickle down from Celeste to the family.

So it seems to be a lot of stuff, a lot of crooked ass stuff.

All I know is DeForvid's not a really good guy, an even worse musician.

Yes.

honestly, his biggest crime is his music.

Well, I mean.

Besides murder.

Who knows?

We haven't gotten to know.

We don't know.

So right now, his biggest crime is what he's doing artistically.

Yes.

Which is quite bad.

The Reddit thing is crazy, too.

Oh, it's a whole lot.

He runs his own subreddit.

He's the only moderator in the DeForvid Reddit.

Oh, really?

And so he's been deleting anytime anybody talks about Celeste.

Of course.

Yeah.

Well, he's the only one in there.

Oh, well, you know.

Hey, DeForvid's got a lot of time in his hands now that his concerts have been killed.

And you know, he's just pacing his fucking house.

As he should be.

He should be pacing a jail cell, but we'll find out.

Oh, yeah.

He's not currently still.

Officially not a suspect.

I mean, I'm sure he'll be arrested by the time this comes out, knowing us.

Who knows?

Or there's something we don't know yet.

Yeah.

There's like that.

That's like the one thing that I'm still, whether they're just waiting till it's rock solid before they arrest him, or there's some piece of information that we don't know yet.

Isn't the FBI looking for his bodyguard or something, too?

Everybody's, yeah, it's his whole crew.

One of his gag.

So DeForvid is...

God, I wonder what his jail albums will be like.

He might actually get better in jail.

You know, Manson did.

He did.

What is with all of these things?

Like, I guess I don't understand.

It's like one of those things I was like, this is where I brought up to Natalie being like, when I I was, when we were young, I remember a feeling of wanting to be more adult.

Yeah.

But I feel like it's even more so now, right?

Like, I feel like it's kind of amplified more.

Like, these are all 13-year-olds acting as if they're all hardcore, hanging out with DeForvid.

All he does is talk about killing girls.

They all think it's fucking like romantic and dark.

Yeah, he was obsessed with gore.

Yes, he loved gore.

But then I think about like Marilyn Manson.

Yeah.

But then I was like really trying to think, what were his songs about though?

Like, it kind of feels like it was smelling children.

And like dark poetry, but like were they about killing women and doing bad things like this music?

Like I think about like a Chris Brown, where Chris Brown's whole thing is like sad songs, dance songs, but he's probably one of arguably one of the most dangerous musicians to live.

Right.

Like he's had several, several arrests for beating the shit out of women.

He's done that many, many times.

And Frank Ocean.

Yes.

He's gotten into a big fight with Frank Ocean.

But his music is like more like softboy music and then his personality is really intense, right?

Like kind of like Drake.

Yes.

Right.

Where he likes to have sex with children as well, sort of, or at least to hang out with them.

He likes partying with kids.

Yeah.

And then he, which is, again, I love a bounce house.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

But I, you know, I like to be, I like being a bounce house bouncer.

Well, I like a bounce.

Stop bouncing.

Stand.

Hey, Jeffrey.

Troy.

Stop bouncing.

Troy standing like a goddamn man.

Yeah, so I don't know.

I guess, like, but I feel like you, how do you you feel, Eddie?

Do you think that it's like that the youngers, like the alphas and late Zoomers are being forced to even grow up even faster than we were?

Of course.

I mean, remember, like we had to, like, you know, getting porn for us was very difficult.

Oh, sure.

You know, we had to like share each other's porn and stuff.

Well, we got to be like, hey, I got this tape.

You're like, oh, man, can I borrow it on Tuesday?

You're like, yeah, sure.

Frank's got it on Thursday, though.

Just so you know.

Yeah.

And then we'd all be like watching the same porno together.

But again, yeah, the predators were also like outside.

Yes.

And they were like, obviously, in our institution, teachers and our priests and stuff like that.

But largely, they were still in meat space.

We didn't have to deal with it in the box that we bring home and carry in our pockets all the time.

I know.

Well, we, you know, very lucky.

You know, it was, it was just starting in the box when we were like

17.

It was.

And then, and it quickly caught up, didn't it?

Oh, yeah.

Well, we had dial-up.

It took longer.

It's so hard.

God, it's so, it's so hard to groom over dial-up.

It really is.

So, so long.

We have a bit of an Epstein update.

Oh, we have an Epstein update.

Do we have a new singer?

We do.

Yay!

Thank you for sending the Epstein singer, everybody.

Who sent this one?

So this one is from

a guy named The Slime Wave.

Okay, cool.

Sleep in Lance.

Let's hear it.

Oh, sweet.

Henry

is disputing

in a plane up in the sky.

Did he say you were on the island and enjoying your time?

I don't know.

I think some of I was dissing Epstein and I'm enjoying myself.

But I mean, that was more of a song than a stinger, but I liked that.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Right, like a singer.

I just need a Epstein, Epstein update.

Yeah, yeah, the update.

Yeah, second release.

Let's see what you think about that.

That's great.

Honestly, that's awesome.

Yeah, I think sometimes people work too hard.

It was a jangly.

I like the jangly.

I think Primus-like.

I think you might like this one a little bit better.

This one is from ChrisLaw at lawstorytime.com.

It's an island adventure.

Heck yeah, it's Jeffrey time.

I mean, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry, Slime.

That one was way better.

That's acceptable.

That one was way better.

That one was like, I don't know.

We're going to use that.

That one's a little too.

I think, yeah, actually, you know what?

I think we're good.

We got a winner?

Yeah,

I don't think we need to send it anymore.

No, I really like that one.

I really like him.

Yeah, I really like that one.

If you want to, who was that guy again?

Law?

Chris Law.

Chris Law, if you want to do that one more time, but just add updates to the end of it.

Updates.

Yeah, that would really help.

Or I guess we could do it.

We can.

Yeah, I mean, we'll see.

Rounds up fucking engineer.

Yeah, yeah.

Let us know if you want us to handle it.

But yeah, thank you, Chris Law.

Very small update today.

It is

basically as more and more documents are spilling out because our government is super bad at cover-ups.

They're so bad at it.

It's amazing.

It's great for the rest of us in many ways.

But it seems that our old buddy, Mr.

Funny Little Wannabe Nazi himself, Elon Musk, he was also very much on the flight list.

Of course, we have a new, but he tried very well.

He actually did a good job of covering that up.

He was really trying to bury that.

That was a part of the whole release the Epstein files thing that he was trying to say.

He said Trump was on the files.

Well, if you know you're on the files, why would you say release the files?

This is okay.

Him and Trump's breakup was fake.

Fake.

That's all.

It happened on the 180th day.

It was fucking fake.

Scripted.

Yeah.

He tried to do his best to

cynically win win people back by doing this strike against Trump.

Then it didn't work.

Then he's saying release the Epstein files because in Trump land, that's him playing the part of somebody who's anti-Trump.

Yeah.

So Trump knows that.

I mean, Trump is very much so obviously in the files.

We now know that he, we have the email that it specifically said to the FBI, get his name out of here.

We also have Epstein specifically saying to Ghislaine, get his fucking name out of here, which is the only one, the only two, the only name that has been asked to be redacted, by the way.

No one ever asked taking about Prince Andrew out of there.

No.

Because guess who also had flight logs

put in place?

That was a part of these documents put out.

Again,

after Prince Andrew's supposed breakup with Jeffrey Epstein, that went very public.

I don't know if you remember that, where

Prince Andrew quote-unquote broke up after their

charges went down and Epstein was finally released and they had this famous like photo shoot that Prince Andrew said was set up by Jeff Epstein that was it was at

it was in I believe in London and you could see the two of them walking together and Epstein did that on purpose like they had that orchestrated to be like Prince Andrew's here or was that yes or is this at Central Park?

It might have been in Central Park.

It's probably in Central Park close to his home.

Well, it looks like Central Park, but it also looks like that main gigantic park in right outside of buckingham palace in london uh and they uh

they were took public pictures together and and prince andrew from then on was like i have not had a bit of relations with epstein ever since and now we know for a fact that they absolutely did and that that's where these new light flight logs came out that showed in 2014 everybody must flight logs i just think i've taken a crap on a on an airplane that's what these guys did yeah except it was a little grosser yeah maybe yeah honestly it sounds like the bathrooms might have been nice.

But this is the, so it's just showing that Prince Andrew's absolutely utterly filled with shit.

Yes.

As we know, as we all know, everybody knew.

And Elon Musk was doing

childlike reverse psychology.

Yes.

I could see that.

And so he was, they were all, again, the games are really shallow right now.

These guys are all extremely bad at this.

And nothing fucking shows me more after reading about Heinrich Himmler for the last like fucking month when you're just like, God, these guys are so bad at being Nazis.

God, Himmler would be so disappointed.

You have a Jew?

You have a Jew-senting policy?

Can you imagine that?

Himmler would be so upset with this crew.

But they, yeah, they're really.

Do you remember Epstein was, of course, arrested during Trump's first presidency.

And murdered during his presidency.

Or whatever happened to him during his first presidency as well.

Yes.

So they're all quite bad.

Yeah, so when they keep saying it's a Democratic hose.

It can't be.

It can't be because he was arrested during a Republican.

Please arrest Bill Clinton.

Yeah, do it.

That would be hilarious, to be honest.

I wouldn't give a fucking thing.

Is anyone checking the McDonald's?

Oh, my God.

Does anybody check the fat pussy store?

Oh, my God.

I didn't realize that Clinton and Trump at the same time.

And you know what, guys?

Listen, we really don't want to talk about politics on this show, but if you keep putting murderers and child molesters into the office,

all I want to do is not talk about the government.

Okay, I'd love to just be back in the, but it's just important to understand that what we're dealing with here is some of the worst group of villains that we have ever seen.

And it's only like when ESPN had to cover fucking Sandusky.

Yes, exactly.

It's like, we don't want to be doing this, but technically he's a coach.

It's like right here.

You know, like, look at us.

Eddie and I have been gallivanting across Hollywood.

I, of course, got to be, and I will talk about how wonderful it was to, like the privilege I felt walking over to Beyond Fest.

And my, the director of the film, Fuck My Son by Todd Rohall, he directed an episode of Pretty Face Going to Hell.

He gave me VIP treatment.

So I got to walk past that crowd waiting to see fuck my son.

And I got to sit in VIP sitting sitting like a true vip watching another man dressed as a woman fuck somebody dressed as his son hell yeah and it was this was the premiere that was the premiere

that's two two nights ago

that's the one i went to and he got to go with the philippo brothers to the smashing machine well danny philippo took me he got to go to a cool ass one i met the rock i met the rock it was great man he was oh god he's so hot yeah he's handsome he's very good very i mean listen to this dude all right.

It's his movie premiere.

The biggest movie.

He's like shooting for an Oscar.

Then once he gets this Oscar, he's going to run for president.

Sure.

You know, it's like, this is the plan.

I don't want him to be president.

I don't want him to be president because he's a Republican.

We know that he's a Republican.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

No, I'm not voting for him, but this is the plan, it seems like.

The man is so hot.

He's at his movie prereer.

He's wearing a suit.

No shirt.

I mean, that's, yeah, he only he can do it.

I mean, I mean, woo!

Yeah, only he can do it.

Woo!

What does he smell like?

I mean, everything and nothing.

Does he smell like, is he stinky?

No, not at all.

No one was stinky.

It was a beautiful, it was a beautiful evening.

See, but that's just the differences between here.

It's just so funny because we kept saying, we were both joking around when I was there with Grant at Fuck My Son.

Yeah.

Oh my God, that's that picture of your face.

It's so funny.

I'm just thrilled.

I've never done shit.

Danny's like, we're getting a picture with the rock.

You're going to fight the rock.

No, you know what I'm saying?

I was like, I don't know, Danny.

I don't know if I got to do this.

No, you'll go fight him.

I was like, all right, well, maybe he's like, he's like, well, maybe we drug him.

I was like, all right, sorry, Danny.

Relax.

No funny.

I don't want our show to turn into one of these other comedy podcasts where we just talk about our green room experiences.

But this really was like...

A true, it was a special experience.

You got to do something really funny, and it was really funny to be a fuck my son VIP.

Yeah, you were a fuck my son VIP, and then I'm hanging out with A24 trying to sell your movie for you.

Yes, go to ufo.movie.

Please help us.

I would have never said anything about my fucking movie there.

I would not have said any of that.

All right, let's get to some more stories.

Let's get to some more stories.

All right.

So the first one we should do is this really, this do first this intense one.

Oh, should we start for 31 for 31?

Should we just do that if we're going to go?

Yeah, we're doing, we're doing 31 for 31.

The list is out.

Go to LP on the left and Instagram to check it out.

We know there are some spelling errors.

We rushed it.

And we're going to fix it.

We just wanted to get the list out.

We are going to fix.

There are some problems with the graphic.

We're going to fix the graphic.

We know Dead Snow is not Korean or Japanese.

No, there was a note in the script.

To put a Korean or Japanese movie in the foreign section, but then Dead Snow stayed.

We were like, oh, we're talking about Nazis.

We got to do a Nazi horror movie.

And then for those of you that are like, oh, these movies should be more intense, it's Halloween.

I'm helping Eddie.

At least half of them.

He did.

We did back and forth.

We went back and forth and we chose.

And so the goal here, honestly, for our 31 for 31 this year, it's spooky.

Yeah.

And we are hopefully going to make side stories more spooky over the next couple of weeks.

The most spooky thing we're talking about today, obviously, is Epstein and DeForvett, but we will be getting into more spooky material as the month goes.

Please send us your letters.

I want to hear your ghost stories.

I want to hear some really scary stuff that's happened to you.

I already got some listener pastas, but I don't want fictional.

I would love some real life ghost stories or real life stories that we could tell here because it's just, it's fun to do.

So just email us inside stories.

Anyone's bang the werewolf, even if it's a cop, you know, let us know.

What movie are are you most excited for on the list?

So far, there's movies that I have never seen before.

One is The House of Dracula, which I've never seen.

That is the O.G.

Christopher Lee Dracula.

That one I've never seen.

And honestly, I'm really excited for our schlock,

the schlock section.

I'm excited for Blood Diner.

I'm excited for,

because we're going to set up in my backyard a screen to watch the thing that came from outer space and Bloodfeast.

Nice.

I have Blood Diner on DVD.

And so that was given to me like a decade ago, and I'm finally going to watch it.

No, I'm glad.

I'm excited.

The one I'm really excited for is the Hitcher.

I've never seen the Hitcher.

It's good.

Yeah, yeah.

You seem like.

Yeah, it's gay.

You know what?

Slashers.

I go in and out on Slashers.

I like Slashers.

I think they're my favorite type of horror.

I feel like that is very common.

And I'm just not, I can give or take slashers, but Hitcher is good.

Okay.

And so, yeah, it's going to be great.

But join us.

Under 31 for 31

Adventure.

All right.

This is R.I.P.

Rucker Hauer.

Is he dead?

No.

Rucker Hauer came.

No, he's not dead.

Not today.

Oh, dead.

2019.

Been dead for six years.

Rest in peace.

Clown.

He died the same day as my Uncle Eddie.

Breaking news.

All right, here we go.

Let's get some stories.

Live from North Lake.

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So this guy,

I love, there's been a rash of it.

I think it's coming a lot because of COVID.

And it's a thing that people do.

Like the idea of a semi,

it's always like a semi-outcast son

that has lived with his parents until he's in his 50s.

This happens a lot.

Yes.

And then this guy, right,

this one specific guy recovering, Lorenz Krauss, he like had this idea in his head that my parents are too old to live.

He said that his mother fell down, smashed her face up, and his father got a terrible case of double vision that actually allowed him to not drive anymore.

And so he said Lawrence Krause took it upon himself to alleviate the pain of his parents' existence by murdering them.

This guy's done nothing his entire life and starts with killing his parents.

Yes.

And he said that it's really fucked up.

But then that's not just where, that's not where this goes, right?

The way it happens is that he decides, they start looking into the social security checks.

He's cashing them.

Of course.

He's been doing it since 2017.

So they started looking into it.

Lawrence Krause, like a true, proud American, decides to get in front of this news story by marching down to the CBS station, his local CBS station.

This is completely real, where he, in an unasked-for interview with the head anchor of, I guess this is what is the WRGB, right?

He, with the guy, who's it, Floyd?

What's his name of the, is the anchor?

This is.

Greg Floyd.

Yes.

Right.

He walks in and says, I want to confess to killing my parents.

Tiny shorts.

Yo, very tiny shorts.

Loves those Under Armor shoes.

And he says to him, oh my God, will you do this on camera?

And for some reason, this man says yes.

So next thing you know, they're in a boot newsroom with cameras on him.

And he is live recording a full confession to him murdering his parents to this interviewer.

Now, it's so funny.

But he's officially pleaded not guilty.

Oh my God.

You guys got to watch this.

It's 32 minutes long.

It's so good.

And the guy comes in, first of all, Lawrence Krauss,

he's Geppetto.

Yeah.

Right.

I mean, that's kind of nice.

He looks like Geppetto.

He has the little glasses.

This is Paul Giamani.

Big, long skullet.

I love.

I'm going to get.

I'm looking forward to having this skullet.

Yeah, you're going to look good in this.

Yes.

obviously he's a weird worm man.

Greg Floyd turns to him and he's just like, so what brings you here today?

And at first, he's all like, I just want to talk about how hard it is to have old parents.

And he's like, yeah?

Yeah.

And he's just like, you know, they just get so old so fast.

And the government really needs to help us.

The government needs us to help.

So basically, he does this whole beginning spiel about how the government needs to kill our parents for us.

Oh.

Keep up Social Security.

No.

Because he's for him.

Social Security is cooking.

Yeah, it certainly was.

He's doing great.

He's saying that you should be able to legally kill your parents.

And then this guy, Greg Floyd, rips him.

He just keeps like being like, so how'd you do it?

He's like, well, we're not going to go into all the details, all that.

How'd you do it?

You know, I don't feel like it's appropriate for me to, did you beat him to death?

Did you shoot her in the head?

Did you stab her in the chest?

He's like, oh, no, no, oh, I wouldn't do it.

Did you suffocate him?

Yes.

I thought he strangled him.

That's, yeah.

It was just like, literally, it was just like, yeah, yes, I did.

Because he basically realized this guy.

And so he gives him the whole thing.

They buried him in the backyard.

And then he lived with her corpses for so long.

But the worst was his describing him suffocating his father to death.

And then the father dead.

And then he was like, but my mom was like, obviously, real kind of sad about that.

So I gave her some time alone with him.

So she laid with his corpse for several hours.

And then I went in and did my mother.

Jesus.

They told him we're going on vacation.

Yeah.

And they did.

And then he did that to his parents.

They They went down south.

I can't believe they believed him.

Yeah, Neil.

How is he going to afford vacation?

He can't even get his own place.

I think there's one way you could put.

Yeah, that's how you put him on vacation, Netty.

Oh, yeah.

And then, of course, all the YouTube comments are about how neither of them are wearing socks.

It is really gross, actually.

It is.

It's gross, but at the same time, he's talking about killing his parents.

And then everyone is obsessed with no socks.

It's the fact that Greg Floyd is in a full suit and no socks on, and it's disgusting.

He's not used to people seeing his feet.

He's ready to go from the the waist up.

Dude, he's not Giorgio Valentino.

He can't be walking around with suit and no socks on unless you are a literal Italian supermodel.

But he doesn't, no one's supposed to see this man's feet.

It does seem to be like they like they, this was hastily put together.

They really have another cups of coffee and he's just sitting there.

No, this is the holding room.

This is like the green room for the next guy about to go on.

They're like, dude, grab a camera, Greg.

Do it right now, guys.

Idiot's about to do some great shit.

Let's go.

Yeah.

How does that work that day?

Like, they're all just sitting in the studios, and a man shows up and like, I'd like to talk about how I killed my parents.

They're all like, copters up.

Yeah.

And they went, and so they called the police.

They did this interview with him.

They shook his hands.

He leaves and he gets arrested right offside.

Good God.

He's such a fucking weirdo, man.

But he's, you know, he's pleading not guilty.

You know, and he's talking a lot.

He's talking to another reporter.

Oh, is that Greg Floyd again?

This man hasn't had.

Well, Greg Floyd went back in after he's jailed.

Oh, I wonder if they have socks in jail.

Oh, wow.

No, no, they don't have socks.

Because it's suicide-wise.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But I wonder if Greg wore socks.

I mean, if he wants to fucking not get

jobs.

Yeah, take notes, Greg.

We all have to talk about this shit.

You know, like, it's like, dude, I don't want to talk about your fucking feet.

Get somebody else there.

They got somebody in there.

They're one thing the government's good at, it's killing old people.

Well, right?

Yeah, I don't want to jump subjects too fast, but there's another guy who took murder into his own hands this week.

Whom?

This fella over here, he's a vigilante.

He has the his name is,

hold on one second.

I'm sorry.

I just want to make sure I say it correct.

Varun Shuresh.

All right.

29-year-old Varun Shuresh went on to

the sex offenders website.

Yes.

And local websites with you.

They do that sometimes, right?

They put these registries together.

Yeah.

And, you know, we talked about it it here on Citizen App wants you to pay for it, but, you know, you can just find it otherwise.

And he found another man named David Bremer.

David Bremer was convicted in 1995 of lewd and lascivious acts with a child.

He was released from prison in 2004.

And then Varun Shuresh

stabbed the fucking shit out of him and murdered him.

Oh, yeah.

Yes.

Oh, yeah.

He went to his house because his address was on the sex offender list.

And he went to his house.

He rang the door.

He's like,

are you David Bremer he's like yeah I'm David Bremer pretended to be an accountant yes so he did this thing where he was doing he wanted to pretend I guess to be a door-to-door CPA offering tax help to old people that's like how he got in the door and David Brimmer opened it and then this guy very Kruger's Dorp very Kruger's Dorp but then this guy went fuck wild stabbed in the fucking neck so he kept going for the neck he stabbed him in the neck and then Bremer ran away and then he chased after Brimer Bremer went to his neighbor's house knocked on the door.

They let him in.

He jumps on Bremer in the neighbor's house, starts stabbing him in the next step.

Bremer gets up again, runs out into the front yard.

Suresh tackles him again, slits his throat.

Yep.

And then after all of it was said and done, he said he deserved to die.

He hurt children and honestly, it was kind of fun.

That's what he does.

Says he says the ordeal was honestly really fun.

He thought it should be cool because everybody hates pedophiles.

Yes.

Which is, I mean, he's not wrong, but it's not cool.

It's never cool to kill anyone.

We know this.

We know that no one likes, no one wants to be murdered.

No one, well, no one needs to be murdered for any cause unless they're actively pedophiling.

Now, I hate every pedophile.

I do not.

I hate David Brimer.

I do not like David Brumer.

No, I have been out of prison for 21 years, arguably rehabilitated.

Arguably.

So, whoo!

If you're going to do this, actually, you know what?

Don't do it.

Yeah.

The

The way I would put this is that we said this right before the show, and I think this could fly, is that there's a lot of violence flying around right now.

Yes.

There's a lot of violence flying around.

There's a lot, it's kind of getting the temperature is really high in the country.

And it's, you know, if pedophiles are going to catch some of it, then that's how that's going to go.

You know?

I mean, that's like one of those things.

All of our pedophiles

are very available on the internet.

Well, this idea, and then, well, because then you have somebody like, oh, fuck your, what's what's his name?

Ted Cruz.

That's when this idea of like, stop attacking pedophiles, and this idea of like, oh, well, then maybe we need to stop having a registry.

This is this new fun thing that they're also trying to do.

And it's just like, no, I think that we can just prosecute this man and stab the pedophile to death to the full extent of the law.

Yeah.

And we can keep doing that every single time pedophile gets stabbed to death.

We'll just tell whoever stabbed him to death that you go to jail.

You know that that's what the result is.

Yes.

Am I shedding a tear?

No.

Yes.

Honestly, no.

But

that's that's how the system works.

Yeah, he was on the Megan's Law website, which is California's version of sex offender registry.

I want them to have a flag in front of their fucking house.

To be honest, I couldn't give a fuck about a pedophile's rights, unfortunately.

So that's one of those things where I couldn't care less, but no one should be murdered for no reason.

Yes, man, it is a sticky situation.

Oh, it's very sticky.

But it's also, yeah, because I'm not,

again, not pro the murder, but.

Again, I'm not super sad about it.

No, I mean, I mean, you know, when was the last time I actually really got sad about a murder?

Yeah, you know.

In general.

Do you know what's interesting?

Because of my, my brain, because obviously I was talking about this at the top of our Himmler episode one about how, like, in therapy, I was like trying to explain this like melancholy I was experiencing this week and blah, blah, blah.

And he's like, you've been reading about Nazis and you're sad.

And I was like, fuck you.

But there was like DeForvid hit me.

The DeForvid stuff is actually making me really, really, like, it's making me really sad.

I mean, obviously, I'm upset about all the stuff, whatever.

But the DeForvid stuff makes me sad just because it just feels like one of those things that it's like

childhood isn't euphoria.

It's not the television show and that everyone needs to

pull their heads out of their asses.

I'm like, kids be kids, but it's like a whole thing.

I mean, I don't know.

Again, I'm just a, I am a fatherless.

I'm a, I am a fatherless, childless, 41-year-old man who stays in his lane.

I'll tell you what, euphoria definitely convinced, put the nail in the coffin on me wanting to have kids.

Oh, yeah.

I was just like, oh, it's fine with me.

I don't need kids to be cooler than me.

Yes.

I don't need kids to be hanging out with a weekend.

Here's an update.

This story, I actually just saw this.

All right.

This documentary series that was about the Austin yogurt murders.

Yes.

Which was a...

How was the doc?

Do you know what?

Surprisingly, it is not as filling as normal documentary.

You know what I mean?

There was something about the yogurt part of it.

I'm sorry.

It was good.

It was a good documentary.

It was a bit long.

But they basically were talking about this.

This was in 1991.

Four teenage girls at an Austin yogurt shop were tied up.

They weren't, I guess, they weren't robbed, but they were shot.

It was a brutal murder, and it has been unsolved ever since.

And it just got, it seems to have just been solved.

They were at an I can't believe it's yogurt store.

And then the guy,

I love those.

Oh, yes.

And then the the guy who did it set fire to the building to get rid of the bodies.

But now it looks like it's this guy.

They tried to prosecute guys, they didn't work out.

But then it seems that DNA.

They gave some dude the fucking death penalty.

Yes.

And he managed to squeak his way out of that thing because of the DNA.

It didn't match his.

Didn't match.

So now it looks like it has finally found its match, which is this guy.

It's Bashers.

What's his first two names?

It's fucking horrible.

Robert Eugene Brashers is looking like he is a serial killer that was,

he died in 1999.

We shot himself during an hours-long standoff with police at a motel in Kennett, Missouri.

Yes.

And he, it seems that they have figured out he was the one who did it.

And there's a bunch of other cold cases that he's being attached to as well.

Carolina in 1990, strangled a woman, and then a mother and daughter in Missouri in 1998.

He was also connected to a 1997 rape of a 14-year-old 14-year-old girl in Tennessee.

Sadly, though, I just wish his mustache wasn't so great.

It's just...

Do you like that stash?

The other one, the previous one, not that picture.

The other one, the older one.

Is this the same guy?

Yeah, I think it is.

I think he's just fatter.

I think he's, yeah, he probably lost weight at some point.

He's done, been dead.

Yeah, he's a fucking scalp.

He's been dead for 26 years.

So it looks like that story has finally come to a close.

He's been dead longer than DeForvid's been alive.

Wow.

God, DeForvid did so much damage.

It's such a small period of time.

Yeah.

No, yeah.

So they, I mean, they know.

I mean, thank God they finally were able to close this case and give these families some kind of closure.

But man, what a brutal fucking murder.

I imagine some more stuff is going to come out about this guy who we didn't know anything about until he fucking killed himself.

Well, no, no, we know that he was a, he had a bunch of.

They're just now.

What I always get worried about with shit like this.

Oh, is that they're going to just like start attaching everything.

Just closing cases.

But they did it through DNA.

It has to be through DNA.

Yes.

If his DNA is there, he did it.

He did it.

Because he's fucking killing people all the time.

Yes.

He does sort of looks like, what's his name?

Ike Baron Holtz.

Oh, okay.

Yeah, I guess a little bit.

You know, cast him in the movie.

Oh, please.

Yeah.

Please, I love him.

I can see him as a scary actor.

He's a great actor.

This is a fun story.

Let's see.

We've been brutal today.

Can we just do something fun real quick?

Well, it's been brutal.

You're right.

Everything's been brutal.

Everything's been great.

There's a very mean squirrel.

Oh, dude.

This shit's fucked up.

There's a very mean squirrel.

This squirrel has sent people to the emergency room.

Guys, this is like not fucking around, man.

Yeah, man.

There is a squirrel, and you know where the squirrel lives?

Diablo Circle.

Oh, fuck.

The squirrel knows the pains of hell.

But this squirrel has been randomly attacking people, sending people to the hospital.

It's attacked five different people.

Two of them have gone to the hospital.

Wow.

And

the woman said it clamped onto my leg.

The tail was flying up here.

I was like, get off of me.

Get off of me.

Like, the squirrel has any fucking idea what you're saying.

But it's kind of crazy the fact that this thing's going out of its way and you're jumping on people and fucking attacking people.

Yeah.

And you know what I like?

My favorite is the very end of the article that I read.

It's

from the Associated Press.

It says that

from the Humane Society said, there have never been reports of squirrel attacks.

coming up with rabies.

Well, that's the thing.

They're worried about the rabies part of it, but it's also.

But they killed the other squirrel because of the rabies.

I remember that.

You remember that?

The guy with the big dick guy?

Yeah.

And they killed, what was that squirrel's name, Mr.

Peanut?

Like Stinkers.

Stinkers, Peanuts.

Peanuts with the squirrel.

Peanut with the squirrel.

Yeah, they were mad.

Oh, they did fucking swim.

They just offed him.

But then in this story, they're like, listen, this squirrel definitely doesn't have rabies.

What has he got?

I don't know.

On the police.

Oh, he's probably a CTE.

Whoa, fuck.

They don't want to check his little squirrel brain.

He's been playing squirrel football too.

Whoa, that's what it is.

Yeah, he's been boxing a little while.

Wow, five months after this, they're still trying to sue for the murder of this squirrel.

Yeah, no, they're not, it's not going to happen.

No, yeah, but how do you quantify how much a squirrel is worth, how much a squirrel's life is worth?

With this squirrel, I think it's just going to be killed

for murder, for being a mean squirrel.

But how do they find it?

No, it's assault.

It's assault.

Yeah.

No, until it has a victim.

It's just assault.

You're right.

It's not good.

But I actually don't really understand how difficult it is to sort of like just fucking

kick this thing to death.

I mean

telling it to the streets.

It's a San Francisco area like

suburb.

So it's a lot of soft people.

It's Lucas Valley.

Lucas Valley.

Is that Forder?

That's footage of it?

Yeah, this is footage.

This footage of the squirrel?

This is footage of the squirrel, yeah.

Where is it?

I don't know.

I don't see it.

Yeah, I don't fucking see it.

Yeah, over there, somewhere.

They're afraid of them.

Wow.

This woman is desperately afraid of the squirrel.

Squirrels over there.

Hitch over there.

I can hear it.

I know it wants to.

Man, the squirrels in my backyard were fucking the other day.

It was pretty great.

Squirrels in my backyard are fucking living a life.

Yeah.

Just sitting out there just loving life while my dog just stares at them.

That's a picture of it right there.

That's it.

Yeah, that's the picture.

Yeah, I can see it.

Yeah, he looks like Gary Busey if Gary Busey was a squirrel.

Yeah, poor guy.

He's just upset.

You know, leave a break.

The squirrel.

Yeah, the squirrel's.

Not Gary Busey.

No, no, Gary Busey, I don't know.

He just grabs his butts.

You see, that got two years' probation.

Oh, is that what happened though?

Yeah, grabbing butts.

really?

Yeah, Halloween and a horror movie festival or con.

Grabbing butts.

I mean, at some point, when are we going to remove him from the public?

The key is, again, to all people, and y'all know, y'all know what to do here.

That hand, no matter where it is, you can touch another human at a con.

It's got to be shoulder blades up.

Shoulder blades up.

Key is shoulder blades up.

Look at it.

If you're even close to a pants.

My hand in their mouth.

Yes.

Hand in mouth is definitely better than hand on butt.

You think so?

Oh, yeah.

Sure.

A lot of people will even be, will take a suck on a thumb.

People like to suck on fingers, apparently, this whole thing.

But that's the key.

But I'm just saying to my artist friends, hands between the shoulder blades.

Never touch anything else.

Don't let the front.

Also, you know what I do?

It's an angle check.

This is how sexless things have gotten, guys.

I do an angle check.

You can't be too close.

Right?

You have to angle your body away.

If your penis can even remotely point towards her clitoris at all,

you're in a danger zone.

That's a good point.

You don't want to be here with the penis facing towards the clitoris.

Yeah.

All right.

So you want to move it away.

The key always move it away.

Cut the angle off no matter what.

Hand above waist.

Yeah.

That's it.

That's all you got to do.

These are all these small rules.

You know, when it comes to the Gary Busey thing,

we all know he's crazy.

We all know he's dangerous.

You know, we all know he's a loose cannon.

Is it at what point are the people who put him on in these cons like slightly responsible?

No, I actually, you can't be in control of anybody's specific behavior.

You really can't.

And Gary Busey, you know, he goes in and out.

It seems like he's one of those guys that sometimes he's fine.

And also, you got to remember, these old school guys, these old, old men, they come from a different time.

Oh, yeah.

And they're really used to.

And this is not an excuse.

This is the kind of shit that needs to educate these morons.

But it's one of those where, like, it's not 1978 anymore.

You just can't touch a woman like that no more.

People get really upset.

You never could.

You never, you know.

You never should have.

No.

But it used to be a little bit

looser out there.

Yeah, but now,

I mean, don't do it.

Don't do it.

Stay away from anyone that you are worried about as well, please.

Oh, look, he's doing fine.

Happy Sunday.

Ice cream Sunday for him.

Oh, wow.

He is frightening looking.

He's just

scary Busie.

Historically scary.

He is.

He's great.

He used to be a really great actor.

Oh, yeah.

He started fired in my grandmother's panties.

I know.

He's amazing in the first lethal weapon.

Lots of people are amazing.

The Buddy Holly movie.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

He's Buddy Holly.

Oh, dude, he's great in that.

Mel Gibson, also great performer.

Great performer.

Great director.

Bad human.

Bad person.

Bad human.

No, you're going to do.

Oh, man.

Sean Penn, so good in one battle after another.

That's what they're saying.

Yeah.

Bad dude.

Bad guy.

Great in the movie.

Sometimes

the best actor is a bad human.

Sometimes you meet these guys.

And I'll go out there and just say, try not to ever meet a comedian you're a huge fan of.

No, especially nowadays.

If you could, try not to meet one because they're all fucking monsters.

They're all so mean.

Our co-workers are all so mean, guys.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Everybody's so mean.

And except some people, well, except for the lovely people enjoying themselves at October 7th.

at the Riyadh Comedy Festival.

I just think that some of our very, favorite Jewish friends are really enjoying themselves playing on that wonderful anniversary down in down over in the Riyadh Comedy Festival, where guys can really be guys.

Shout out to all the comics.

Chris DeSteffano, our old buddy, that did a fun little plug for Riyadh and how great Saudi Arabia is.

How about like all the rest of it?

God, I just, I'm so, I can't believe that.

Shout out to Nimesh Patel for dropping out of the street.

Yes.

Good work.

Good on you, buddy.

Good on you, Nimesh.

I'm proud of you, man.

Live from North Way.

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Carmi actually said, Suvu play, Mamie, please have some chicken the other day.

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Alright, they confront the intruder saying, hey, Buster Brown.

They'll all be like, hey, Buster Brown, you leave that grass alone.

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That's what those guys are going to say.

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Speaking of some other people that have CTE, Eddie.

Oh, yeah.

Shane Tamura.

You remember him?

He was the guy who drove from Los Angeles to New York City to shoot up the offices of the NFL.

He played high school football and he claimed he had CTE.

And so he went to the offices of the NFL in New York City, drove all the way from Las Vegas.

He had a big old gun with him.

And he went in and he shot up the lobby and then he went upstairs upstairs and he went to the wrong floor because he got on the wrong elevator, shot someone from Black Rock or Blackstone.

Blackstone.

Shot one of the CEOs there and then ended his own life.

And he had a note in his pocket said he was doing it because he had CTE and to please study his brain.

I am sorry.

And

turns out he had it.

He has CTE.

Wow.

Now, I'm not saying that he should have done this, but it's just, it falls under the same thing we were talking about earlier.

But it's finding it very interesting that

it seems that the CTE

kind of also fucked up what he was doing too, in a way.

Like it seemed like he was confused.

He didn't know what, what, quite what he was doing.

He knew he was angry and he wanted to do something about it.

But it seems that he had all of the CTE symptoms too, right?

Where it's like...

If he didn't have GPS, he probably wouldn't even have gotten there.

Oh, my God.

If we were still doing map quests, you know,

everyone would still be alive.

You know how it is to find.

He would have shot at a tree somewhere in Arkansas.

You know what I mean?

Like if this was a real,

back in the day, if he had to follow those little squiggly lines with CTE, he couldn't be able to get anywhere, man.

People like, goddammit, this map spaghetti.

But yeah, no, he

unfortunately, he's very much suffered from it.

He only played high school football.

Well, didn't they, is there a lot of people that say that there was a, that that's the conspiracy theories that he was never there to shoot the NFL people?

But it just seems like it's so deeply on the nose that, yeah, and it does seem like weirdly, in other cases.

But that would mean the cops made it up.

Eddie.

Yeah.

Well, I mean.

Cops never.

What?

Cops don't make stuff up like that.

But what's the end game?

What's the end game of them making this up?

What do you mean?

Cops aren't going to fucking make up.

Cops love football.

Cops watch, as someone who worked at a sports bar in New York City, cops love football.

They're there every week watching the fucking games.

They're not going to sit there and put negative press about the NFL out there.

I'm telling you, they're just not.

So you think that that was the idea that that's a good thing.

I think this guy really did want to, this guy knew he had CTE and he went there to shoot everybody.

And he just was looking for it.

And then when he couldn't get, when he'd already shown up the lobby and he couldn't figure out how to get into the NFL part,

he just delayed a plate at weird.

He might have thought that he did.

That's the worst part.

God, yeah, if it's just him just going back into the lab, like in his head, just being like, Lace is out.

Lace is out.

Yeah, I mean, it's, you know, he killed civilians.

He killed a cop.

He killed the security guard.

You know, it was a fucking big mess, man.

And they also got some very interesting emails like talking about the Guardian helmet and about how it doesn't really do that much.

And we're still sort of in this kind of cloud.

This is,

your series on Aaron Hernandez could not have been at a weirder.

It really was.

Because not only the goal was like for the start of football season, I didn't realize that Rudy Johnson was going to fucking kill himself.

I didn't realize this guy was going to shoot up.

I was already working on it when this crime happened.

It's just interesting.

And now that we know the DSCT, it makes a lot of sense.

And I'm just, God, it's hard because then you and I then redefended NFL last week.

And you come back and you're like, sorta, you know, it's like, really?

I mean, I still, you know, I mentioned the things that were positive about it, but then in the very next breath, I mentioned that Rudy Johnson took his own life.

Yeah.

You know, and Rudy Johnson

was notoriously a nice guy until the end, you know, and so it's like he's, you know, this is what happens.

Yeah, it is just, it's a shame, man.

But also, I'm done, dude.

I know, you're out.

It's fucking, I hate it.

I guess it's been driving me crazy all week.

You know, the, dude, I said it multiple times.

The amount of messages I've gotten from people that are like just thanking me for fucking talking about it in real, like with all earnest and reality of what the fuck's happening here.

Like, ex-football players are messaging me.

You know, it's just fucking crazy, absolutely.

I get it.

It's so hard.

It's a whole I can see being conflicted too, though.

I can see it all.

I understand why people are conflicted because I do understand there's a search, our country right now, and I think a lot of people right now are have this idea which is coming up in our series that we're currently doing.

They want a fantasy, they miss being alone in a fantasy, they miss they miss a world that never existed, They miss a pure, quote-unquote world that was never there.

And football and sports like key into what we were talking about before last time, that nostalgia button.

That's bigger.

The nostalgia button is not just about IP and about stuff like that.

It's about this idea of wanting to go back to something that was simpler.

And it, you got to understand as a person, it never was.

Yeah, well, nostalgia is all like you trying to relive the only decent times of your childhood.

I get it.

That's what nostalgia really is.

You're keying into that.

But then the thing is in my mind is like, don't you want new moments now, though?

I'm creating them personally.

But same thing.

I felt like, I'll say it, it's weird as a 41-year-old man.

It felt like I became 13 again.

You know what I mean?

They say, I've heard people talk about this, but it's true.

It's like I started to realize like.

It's not a midlife crisis for us.

It's just fun.

Yes.

I just get to have, I'm having more fun than I've had in a long time.

But

there's just something about this idea of that, of like, that's why they don't want to fuck with it.

It's because if you start fucking with football and you really, do you remember all the kind of drama went on when the stupid home run scandals and baseball and all the deflate gate stuff with and all that kind of stuff?

It just like, it bums people out.

Well,

it's their release.

It's, it's, for a lot of people, it's their entire personality.

And I know, you know, and it's, you know, it's hard, you know and what i miss about football one of the things i do miss about football is because obviously even though like i you know i haven't watched in two years now and you know the the one thing i miss is like being able to talk to like people i don't know well yeah bros you know like people like you know it's like oh we're talking about you know what i do is i just revert back to 90s you know start talking about the 90s because that's all burnt in my head yeah you know like i have no idea who the fuck's playing now you know it's well if you want to worry about never having conversations ever again, just start talking about Epstein.

Every single time they talk about football, you could just talk about all the stuff you know about Jeffrey Epstein, or you could do stuff like that.

Yeah.

Just squash all that.

Oh, yeah, just be like, oh, you know, my favorite player is Colin Kaepernick.

Yep, done.

Yeah.

Watch it.

All right.

So we have some listener emails.

Which is going to stay kind of in the same little area here.

It's just a, all, you know, also shout out to Teddy from Lambert's Cafe for sending us molasses.

Honestly, I don't know what the fuck we're going to do with it.

I don't know what I'm going to do with it.

Kill someone with a can?

Fuck.

You're going to fuck with molasses?

I'm going to fuck with it.

Oh, God.

This is my new lube.

You wanted it for the jar?

Because we got a jar.

Someone sent us the jar.

You could ask for molasses for the jar.

Oh, is that what happened?

I think

I forget the tea.

It's going to be a mess.

Don't open that.

Do you think me opening up this jar of molasses is going to cause a problem?

Yeah, don't open the molasses in here.

I don't like how you get it.

Rob's in charge of the molasses.

I don't want you touching that.

We got a lot of thought.

We We got stuff going on.

Stiff.

You're stiff.

Yeah.

Damn.

I got a couple stingers if you guys want them.

Of course.

Listen to mail.

Listen to emails, please.

Listener, email.

The listener, email.

Listener.

Oh, this is like new.

Yeah, she's very moddy.

She's very deformative.

Very deformative.

Yeah.

Can you hear me beep?

Damn, dog.

Oh, yeah.

It's a long-ass stinger.

I was going to say, it's a little too long.

It's a stinger.

It's a whole song.

Five seconds.

That was great, though.

I appreciate it.

I like that a lot.

Who did that one?

That one is from Tyler Templeton.

Oh, Tyler Templeton.

Love that guy.

And we've we've been getting so many stingers lately.

Like, we've been getting flooded with stingers.

I love the stingers.

This last one is absolutely insane.

We have another one?

You got to hear this one.

This one is insane.

Yeah.

Top stories that's in the email for every

stories that's in the email for every

day.

Side Stories: The Confession

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Transcript

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