402: The Snuff That Screams Are Made Of [ft. David Bluvband]

It is a time of chaos.

Without a ruler, the galaxy is paralyzed by lawlessness, unrest, and of course the colossal all wheat, which looks like some sort of black hole sun.

Now, Captain Dar and their intrepid crew must survive the looming threats, reunite a fractured galaxy, and meet weird bug creatures and stuff.

stuff.

This

is Mission to Zinx.

Yeah, what is it?

How are you doing?

Me?

I'm doing great.

Yeah?

Yeah.

I really took your advice to heart the other day, C-53.

You said I shouldn't be wearing these shorts.

Lost them.

Got rid of them.

You gotta put something on.

Well, the robe doesn't really tie anymore.

Yeah.

I would say from 80% of the angles, I'm good, right?

Yes, the 20% that I'm concerned about.

Okay, right.

It's okay to live by my own rules for a while.

A black?

Yeah, yeah, what is it?

Put on the pants.

Yeah, Papa.

You look like you've given up in a big way.

AJ, you are constantly taking off your armor, and you're completely.

But I look like this.

Oh, that's a good point.

You have the body of a chiseled marble rod.

Also, importantly, he puts the armor back up.

Okay.

Just get some pants.

Isn't it crazy for me to ask you to do that?

You know what?

I'm going to defer it to the captain, who famously likes nakedness.

So.

Captain.

One second.

I've now moved.

Okay, Horse Hat is down for a nap.

Hey, Pleck.

Yep.

Darling?

Yep.

Your pants?

Where are they?

The thing is.

Make them put on pants, Captain Dar.

Make them put on pants.

I have pants.

I have pants for some of the old stars used to hang out.

Alright, drop in the box of pants.

Whoa, that's a lot.

Whoa.

Bargie, these don't even have the same number of legs as a Tellurian.

What?

Papa, don't make me do this.

AJ, what are you doing?

AJ, put them on.

Okay, fine, I'm putting them on.

Oh,

not those?

Yeah.

What?

These are cool.

Sort of look like athletic leggings.

Those do nothing for your figure.

Oh, Papa, they don't cut a line at all.

This is starting to freak me out because Papa's giving up, Dar's up tight, Bargie's not an actress.

Don't freaking out, man.

AJ, AJ.

AJ, you know, it's important to kind of mix it up every once in a while.

That way, you know, nobody gets bored of what we're doing.

What, are we just going to add another crew member or something like that?

I mean, we may, maybe, at some point.

You know, every once in a while, you can.

Oh, no, Bargie.

Oh, boy.

Things are different, and I don't like it.

Okay.

AJ, you might just have to get used to it.

Yeah, AJ, things change, you know?

Oh, Captain Darr, I have an incoming transmission from temporary emergency and and serial negotiations mission operations manager and everything.

Sorry, guys, I meant to call earlier.

I just was running late.

I had to, um, I was at uh Dale's memorial.

So, uh, yeah,

right, Dale.

Everyone seems pretty drunken after that.

When they asked me to speak at it, it was awkward.

Hey, you remember when you cheered when I shot him?

AG.

And you're like, you got him right between the eyes.

I know, but at that point, we thought it was like a murderous beast, not a beloved denizen of the planet.

Right.

With a family.

Come on.

Yeah.

Oh, well.

How's the office life, Nermit?

Oh, it's.

I mean, it's really solid.

Look at these ceilings, like this perfect, shiny, curved ice.

Everything's so smooth and reflective, I can check my look.

And you're sort of like back in your element.

Right?

This is like familiar to you.

Yeah, yeah.

Why?

Nothing.

Just feels good.

AJ's right, AJ.

AJ's.

Oh, geez.

Wow.

It's a big transition time for him.

Yeah.

His gun has been in and out of his butt several times already today, so.

Okay.

I think his butt is just a little tired, so.

Well, you know what I got for you guys?

What's up?

A mission.

Alright.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Here's the deal.

Thank Rod we were able to send that message out from the tower on that planet full of mutants because we got a response.

And I guess we got a response to Sisu's announcement that she's going to unify the galaxy within the void of power left after the Emperor became the Allweed.

And here's the thing: the first message back came from the Zixdishnian quartile.

The Zixdishnian quartile?

The Zixdishian quartile.

How old is this person?

Yes, exactly.

That is what the Sixth Squadron used to be called during the monarchy.

The address came from Castle Vornakian.

Castle.

These are rich, rich, rich.

Former monarchy who want to support Sisu's mission.

We're going to go here and get critical support.

Great.

Speaking of critical, from a development standpoint, I just want to say that this is real hot right now.

Oh, really?

Monarchy scripts are getting greenlit?

Yep.

You're talking about the show, The Kroon.

The Kroon.

Oh, so good.

But it's about how the the monarchy formed the Kroon currency system.

Yeah.

Wow.

Captain Darr, permission to be excited about this mission?

Yeah, AJ.

Everyone, cover your ears.

Feel it at full force.

Woo!

Okay.

Let's do this!

Mission time!

We just got permission to get excited!

Captain Darr, do you want me to come along on the mission, or should I stay on the old ship?

Just a quick aside, Plaque.

Don't worry.

We're not talking about you.

Okay,

I really think I need plaque on this mission.

Really?

For reasons that are specific to me.

Okay.

One small request.

If he comes, he has to wear the pants.

I don't know how to reinforce the pants.

What if we do something like reverse psychology where we like reverse our gun and point it at him and be like, do it!

Why not?

If we're still doing the aside, I just want to say, please, please take him.

Gather, devout Alweetians.

It is our cleric Tufa Pupu.

The days grow ever near when we will be gloriously consumed by the cleansing power of the All Wheat.

Yes!

Yes!

The Orweat shall open its fiery gates, unlocking our perfect oblivion.

But until then, life is kinda boring and we still have to do our lame jobs and stuff as we await our horrific salvation.

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Short of being atomized into sublimity by the magnificent All Wheat.

That's shutter.com protocol the zix.

Now quickly the all wheat rises in the east.

Strip your mortal bodies bare and join me in our daily shrieking.

Shutter.com!

Reload

all wheat!

Yeah, mission to

gonna be fine.

Great, great, great, great, all good.

Worried.

You're not gonna have like a meltdown like last time, right?

When we had all those mutants come at us and you freaked out.

Nope, can't say that I'm planning on another meltdown.

No.

Oh, that's

holy corp.

This castle is no joke.

C53, is this the only structure on the planet?

No, but it is 40% of the planet's surface.

Wow.

Yeah, the monarchy was.

Oh, boy.

Oh, get out of here.

AJ, don't kick me.

AJ, you can't kick someone just because they're a peasant.

Up Cleck, respectfully.

As captain, captain, I'll be the one to tell AJ what he can and cannot do.

Yeah, you're right.

Captain Dart, permission to kick these rabbit peasants.

These rabbit peasants.

AJ, don't kick the peasants.

Oh.

Yeah, good job, Dar.

Good greetings.

I see the peasant folk have bothered you most hastily.

Separate.

Separate.

There, there.

Captain Dar.

Yeah?

Do you think those boys boys are twins or clones?

Honestly, at this point, I couldn't say.

It's hard to tell.

When you go to a new planet, you can't tell what the deal is.

Hey, does anyone notice that their mouths aren't moving and I can hear them in my head?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So we're just agree- they're like weird, right?

Is that what we're trying to say?

Guys, I think we established these asides they can hear.

Oh, right.

Right.

Yeah.

Hi.

Hi.

Sorry.

So you're Dean and Petey, huh?

Yeah.

Petey and I come from a long line of Vernakian telepaths.

Dean and Petey.

Yes.

How old are you?

Okay, that's fine.

I think I see what's happening.

The planet Vernakian actually orbits its star once every twelve years.

So,

yeah, yeah.

Please follow us inside Castle Vernakian.

Yes, yes.

Wow, this place is incredible.

Indeed, you've got a lot of portraits done of your family.

Yeah, look at all these.

Oh, yes, it's every Vernakian in history.

Ever since Saint Vernakian the first.

Saint Vernakian the first honey.

First advisors to the monarch.

That's right.

That's right.

The only person who knew the monarch's true identity was Saint Vernakian.

Oh, wow, wow.

You know, everyone tried to assassinate him all the time, so they kept it a secret.

Wait, wait, hold on.

There was a monarchy?

AJ.

What?

There was the Federated Alliance.

Ah, yes, huh?

There was a rebellion.

There was the Empire.

There's a monarchy?

Before the Federated Alliance?

When you became a clint, that was during the monarchy.

Huh, I think I must have gotten mind wiped.

I just don't think you were paying attention.

Yeah, I think it's more likely you didn't know who you were working with.

Oh, well, I'm bowing, so

there you go.

Oh, that's easy.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

Wow, down on the ground in under three seconds.

Oh, yeah, well, whenever I see that seal, I automatically think it down on the ground.

Oh,

is that where that comes from?

What?

Look at the seal.

Get down on the ground.

Oh, wow.

Okay, there it is.

Okay.

Yeah.

What are you guys trying to connect?

I don't know.

Don't worry, you're pretty.

Yeah, don't worry too much.

That is...

Who taught AJ what diplomacy was?

I heard it.

Yes, Petey and I rich as juck.

Yeah.

Cool.

Yeah, yeah, no, we can tell that just from this entry hall.

Yeah, we got this crazy hot chandelier.

Oh, wow.

It's an entire crystalline replica of the castle in the chandelier.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

Wow.

I'd say it's beautiful, but it hurts to look at.

And we added a strobe before.

Oh, man, wait till I tell Bargie about this.

She's going to be so pissed because the croon is not like us at all.

Pete Dina.

You ever heard of the show The Kroon?

We love the Croon.

Really?

We love the croon so much.

We've seen every episode of the world.

Is it accurate to what the monarchy was like?

Oh, we don't know.

It looks cool.

It's about you guys, though, right?

On some level.

Yeah.

Hmm.

Okay.

All right.

Your Royal Highnesses, your Royal Highnesses, time for you to go diamond kisses.

Oh, okay.

Open your mouth, Petey.

Now open your mouth, Dean.

Wow.

I don't get it.

Now open your mouth, Petey.

Pretty gross.

I wish I had a brother.

Now open your mouth, Dean.

A thousand guys

like him.

Well, you should really relate to work, friends.

It's exactly the same situation you were doing in the middle.

I don't think so.

I don't know.

Look at them kissing diamonds back at one another.

Everything here is very fancy.

Yes.

Congratulations.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Bark, a bark.

Ah.

Bark, a bark.

Ah, woof creature, blessed be.

And may we lick the face?

Captain Darr, it's really funny they call dogs woof creatures here.

Also, hilarious that it's a wolf creature, but it makes a bark noise.

Yeah, also, I don't know if you can call it a dog.

It seems awful.

That's true.

Ah, yes.

Yes, woof creature, it is time for your samba classes.

Yes.

Woof Creature must go to their dancing classes so they can say fit fit.

As the owner of a pair of athletic leggings, I would just like to say that I appreciate fitness as well.

Wow, okay, boomer.

That's wow.

Wow.

Wow.

That's red plus.

What does that mean?

Notoriously optimistic.

Get out of there.

We don't want to talk to you right now.

Hey, can we talk to the coolest people on the ship, please?

Oh, yeah, you're definitely not talking to me if that's what you're looking for.

Can you go to the corner or something?

I mean, sure, yeah, okay, all right.

We're so sorry about that like that.

Yeah.

You guys need to know.

We will be embarrassed if you guys keep acting like him, okay?

Oh, no, we don't.

Oh, we don't act like Plex.

In fact, we really brought him down here as a favor.

Okay.

He was just sort of very depressed, eh?

We thought it might help if he got out of the ship.

You you know.

Yeah.

Oh, alright.

That's fine.

That's fine.

Hey, Papa.

Hey, Papa.

Yeah.

How does it feel to be back in the field?

I mean, it's good.

I've sort of been asked to hang back, so it feels a little worse, I would say.

We're all a crew.

I'm the captain.

I'm Captain Dar.

Oh, I mean, I wasn't going to ask names because I already knew them.

What?

You're Captain Dar.

Uh-huh.

And you're Pleck Deck Setter.

Oh, yeah.

No, No, no, no, don't, don't talk.

Okay.

And you, your AJ.

That's right, yeah.

Yeah.

And the computer who's.

Ow, well, you caught me.

I can't read computers, but you amazing you can transmit to a cube.

We have great surround, sound, telepathy on this planet.

Hey, Miss Robot Man, they're calling you a computer.

That's uh,

drawing

a computer.

It's all bleep bloops to me.

We believe in the finer things in life, not tech.

We believe in the opera and

snuff?

I'm sorry.

I'm taking myself out of exile here for a second.

Did you say you used snuff?

Yeah.

Yes.

Why are you out of the corner?

I was just admonished for being old, but snuff, I mean, that's like a 500-year-old.

Oh, wait, you guys don't do snuff?

I mean, no, everyone does it here on this planet.

May I offer the coolest people in the room water that hurts the roof of your mouth when you drink it?

I'm okay.

No, no, all the cool people will have it.

Captain's decision.

Captain's decision.

I don't want to lose their trust.

Alright, everyone but Pleck, get your snuff ready.

And

everyone, there's a line in front of you.

Yeah, we're all gonna do a line.

You have to be cool.

Water is really gonna chuck me up.

That's a lot of fun.

I really shouldn't do this.

Well, listen, this is a captain's decision that we want PDD to trust us.

So we are going to do drugs and drink water that has too much carbonation in it.

Can I get an aye aye?

Aye, aye.

Okay.

Everyone roll up your croons and let's do this.

Oh, ow, ow.

Oh, wow.

They party hard.

They are the coolest.

Okay.

Are you supposed to smoke it?

Oh, no.

Oh, no, somebody put that out.

Somebody put that out.

253, are you you okay?

Oh,

no.

The midnight shadow frame does not like snuff, and it really does not like water.

Put more water out.

Put more water.

No, no, don't go.

Oh, no.

Oh, dear.

Oh, dear.

Yes, please.

Hot it.

Please don't.

Oh, no.

Oh, no.

Oh, no.

Okay, I'm just going to remove C's cube.

Oh, no.

Your technology-enhanced friend has been decommissioned.

I can give him another frame to encapsulate if you'd prefer.

That would be hella chill.

That would be sis-a-sis-a-so-cool.

So cool.

So very cool.

Hell yeah, night.

Hell yeah, rook.

Yeah, yeah.

Hell yeah, night.

Hell yeah, rook.

Let's get that frame for my friend here.

Oh, yeah, sure.

We have this old silver chassis from a vampire.

Wow, it's very intricate.

Are you sure this is gonna work as a droid frame?

I mean, it sort of looks like a coffin.

Yes, it's more of an Iron Maiden.

My great-grandfather, Saint Vernakian, developed this chassis as a bloodletting device when he was bit by a vampiric queen

and needed to bloodlet constantly.

So

it is a so let me let me further describe it.

It is a former Iron Maiden that your cube-shaped friend can fit inside.

But they'll be pierced constantly.

Well, I guess the option right now is no frame or frame.

And Captain's decision, it goes to the frame.

But I'll fly.

Now crank the spikes

to his tribe.

Wait, the cube is being hit by the spikes?

Oh, yes.

What is this?

C-53, are you okay?

Every movement is

gut screeping against the exterior of my cube.

Yes, how great-grandfather wanted it.

This is a living hell.

Why would a cube slot be in a torture device?

You know, it was just a standard unit I've been here for a while.

It's very easy to retrofit them.

Oh, wow.

Okay.

There's three men weights.

I'm sorry, C53.

Your Majesty's, what about this frame here?

It's all like spooky and hit.

Oh, yes, this is Saint Vernakian.

Exactly.

Oh, can we just put the cube in that?

No, no.

If anyone from Not This Planet touches this, they will be doxxed beyond belief.

They will be cancelled.

Ah, hell yeah, Rush.

Hell yeah, night.

What does dox mean?

Oh, that makes sense.

That means it's a capital offense.

Oh.

And they'll be cancelled to death.

Your life is cancelled.

Yes, okay.

Hey, AJ, quick aside.

Yeah, you got it.

I feel like I'm really feeling the snuff, and you feel so normal.

Your face feels so normal still.

Why?

Are you still so okay?

Because my body metabolizes things quicker, not actually altered by many chemicals.

Wow, same man.

Oh, so I'm the only one

feeling it right now?

What's up?

Um, so see he's kinda getting tortured right now, and Dara's like on snuff.

I think we just gotta take C2 cube out of that torture device and just figure it out when you're gonna make this

the other thing I'm I'm having trouble with is determining what is weird and what is fancy.

Oh, hey, Dean.

Yeah, Petey.

Hoist me up to the chandelier.

Whoa, he's just.

There's just swinging on it.

One's got the other's feet and they're swinging on it.

Oh, boy.

What do you think, Andrew?

Things are weird.

I mean

both, I think, right?

Yeah, we're in the overlap of the Venn diamond.

Please take me out of this freaking.

We were so busy having a chill time we forgot to ask why are you guys here?

This celebrity might not be quite as strong as we originally anticipated.

Ah, hell yeah, Rook.

Hell yeah.

Uh hell yeah, Kwan.

So

my super chill, super cool friends and I are here.

And we've been like, we've all been getting along, right?

God, don't slap my back, please.

Yeah, see?

Uh, hell yeah, bishop.

So, like, we were just like, all here hanging all here like so cool so cool so cool and we want your money we want crew darn

captain

could you help me here?

Yes, absolutely

pet the fleck petting cleck Dean Petey listen what what our captain is trying to say

Listen I'm sorry

you keep swinging in circles on the chandelier and it's hard for me to

I'm just an old dumb piece of shit.

Okay.

Agreed.

Okay.

Petting pluck.

I'm just an old dumb piece of shit here to tell you, Dean.

What did I just say?

I thought you were...

You just said...

When you don't move your mouth, it's hard for me to tell which of you is talking at any given time.

What?

Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful to Luriam.

Okay.

Alright, Dar.

My head is petted out, I think, at this point.

Alright, I think it's time for you to pet my head.

Okay, okay, sure.

Listen, Dean and Petey, we came here because we were summoned because you saw a transmission we made from Sisugundu.

That's right.

So you guys are the envoy from Sisugundu.

Hell yeah, bishop.

Yeah, give me an L-shape, night.

Yeah.

Gotcha.

Yep, yep.

King me.

What are you doing, man?

You're really blowing it.

You are not cool at all.

You're no chess piece.

You're none of the pieces.

No deal.

Please leave.

Okay, Piano.

Alright.

Whoa.

Oh, my rod.

Papa's depressed.

Dar's on drugs.

C's in a torture chamber.

I'm the only one left.

Give us your money.

Oh my god, we've never seen one of those.

Put him in the bags.

Put on the bag.

Hey, Jay.

Oh, you guys are doing better?

You guys are chucking it all up.

Oh, my, my freaking rod!

Yeah, no, I'm gotta blaster on you.

This is my kind of diplomacy.

Hey Jay, this is not necessary.

Listen, everybody's falling apart.

Hey, Jay, this is what I do.

Alright, I'll give you 500,000.

500,000 crude.

Okay.

Okay, thank you.

It's good.

500,000 crude.

Okay, well, I'll give you 5 billion.

Yeah, okay.

That was one billion.

That was like one number, and that was a much bigger number.

Great negotiating, pop-up.

I'm so scared.

Good, thank you.

Alright.

Petey, Petey, Dean, you don't have to do this.

We accept.

Captain, just accepted.

Get the crew, get it now.

Dean, Petey,

we're not trying to rob you.

You literally pulled guns out of your butt.

Okay, one of us did that.

We're so privileged.

We've never faced anything this difficult or hard before.

Oh no, I'm so scared.

I've never been this scared.

Please.

Please take whatever you want.

Back.

Oh, take, take wolf creature.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, we can't do that.

We do not want the wolf creature.

We're taking this.

We're taking Saint Venornaki.

We can't take Saint Vernak.

We can't take Saint Vernaki, and he was petrified by the vampiric queen that seduced him.

There's no way I'm putting you in that state.

It's fine, beef, it's cool.

AJ, Petey and Dean told us that's literally their great-grandfather's corpse.

It's the husk of my great-grandfather.

Hold up.

It's the husk.

It just happens to be cube-shaped.

Wow.

It's the one that if you touch it, you get dust and cancel.

Okay, okay, so we're not taking that, but we're taking the money.

Well, thank you for diplomacying with us.

That's not a word.

Please don't kill us.

Alright, we won't.

And that is how you do

Brodoff.

Okay, let's get going.

Please don't tell my parents.

Do you have parents?

Yeah, we have parents, but they're away.

They left us the place for the weekend.

They're on the Cape.

Oh, no.

The Cape of St.

Vernacion.

Oh, yeah.

Okay, that checks out.

Yes, it's the other side of the planet.

Do you want to get out of the torture box?

Okay.

Wait, before you guys go, just could you like

refill some of the liquor bottles with like just make it look like you didn't take all of it?

Like, do have water on it.

Nope.

Nope.

You gotta learn some cops points.

No.

They trusted us.

They trusted us.

Listen, Nermit, I don't feel good about how we came by this money.

What do you mean?

This is, I've never seen this many zeros.

They're on the right side of the decimal point or left side, the good side.

Yeah, zero.

The right side has no value.

Great job.

This is an unadulterated win.

Yeah, I mean, listen, it was a win, but I just can't shake the feeling we took advantage of a couple of children.

Pleck, it's worth remembering those were 24-year-old adults.

That's true.

Also, Pleck, if it makes you feel any better during the monarchy era, the Vernakians obtained almost their entire fortune through sticking up with their families.

Are you serious?

Man, yeah, very, very weird.

I think it's fancy.

Wolf creature kind of time.

Hey, hey, I know I don't do the missions, okay?

But I just gotta say, I agree with Cleck.

Oh, thank you, Bargie.

I agree with Cleck that much money, and you don't give me any of it?

Bargie!

Listen to how my wing is sounding these days, by the way.

That's not a good thing.

Hey, Barge.

Yeah.

Development, you like get stories, right?

And you make them things?

Yep.

What would you say about a story about two telepathic little boys whose grandfather was a vampire and like was bit by a vampire queen and they're like super rich and they're like sexy and have parties and stuff?

Yeah, that's on the new season of the croon.

Oh,

I mean, I wish I could write that.

Wow.

That's a great story.

Already done.

Oh.

Barge, thanks for

Sorry about the midnight shadow.

No, no, Pleck.

You should be apologizing.

You're not the captain.

See, I'm sorry about the midnight shadow, and that I wanted you to be cool.

Peer pressure is a powerful force.

I'll miss the midnight shadow, but not as much as I won't miss the torture chamber I was in.

Michelle, for sure.

I just wanted to apologize for doing diplomacy back there because.

I think we oh diplomacy actually.

I'm just saying.

Oh, it doesn't do that.

Oh, you brought one of those seals with you.

Oh, hello, Sisu.

Ooh, we're getting the seal clap.

Everyone, Sisu Gundu is here.

Nermit.

Yes.

Are you all with the team?

Yes, I was just congratulating them on

the congratulate them in person.

Yes.

We were in mourning after the loss of Dale.

I even thought about stopping my my noble mission of reunification.

Because if there are people so bad out there to kill dearest Dale, why would I want to bring them together?

But this gives me hope, you know?

You are a team that did a great job.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Okay, everybody!

I have an announcement to make.

We have gathered every team's crew donations and we have made over five billion crews.

Well, we have a great captain.

Huh, thanks, Flex.

Now, because we're a team, I won't be naming names of who deserves the most credit.

You did good!

You did good!

You did good!

Not even anyone up there!

I wish we'd gotten a little credit, but

that's okay.

You did good!

Oh, that's a table!

The table did good!

Oh, the table did good.

There's no way that table did as well as we did.

This year at IT5, credits attributions droid commencing outro protocol.

Plex Dexter was played by Alden Ford.

C-53 was played by Jeremy Bent.

Captain Darr was played by Allie Pokesh.

Bargie the Ship was played by Rujan Dolphagari.

Teen Mom Nermit Bundaloy was played by Seth Lynn.

PD and Dean Steve Vernakim were played by special guest David Bluffband.

David is best known for playing the human fish on the Chris Gethard Show and Virgil, the record store guy, on the marvelous Mrs.

Maisel.

You can see him perform in New York every Saturday night with the UCB improv team, GOAT.

This episode was edited by Seth Lind with sound design and mix by Shane O'Connell.

Music composed by Brendan Ryan and performed by famous Macedonian Symphonic Orchestra.

Opening crawl narration by Jeremy Crutchley.

Ship design for the Bargerian Jade by Eric Goitz.

Audio hosting by Simplecast.

Mission to Zix is a proud member of the Maximum Fun Network.

Hi, I'm Allie Gertz, and I'm Julia Prescott, and we host Round Springfield.

Round Springfield is a new Simpsons podcast that is Simpsons adjacent.

In its topic, we talk to Simpsons writers, directors, voice-over actors, you name it, about non-Simpsons things that they've done because surprise, they're all extremely talented.

Absolutely.

For example, David X.

Cohen worked on The Simpsons, but then created a little show called Futurama.

That's our very first episode.

So tune in for stuff like that with Yardley Smith, with Tim Long, with different writers and voice actors.

It's going to be so much fun.

And we are every other week on maximumfund.org or wherever you get your podcasts.

If you like maximumfund.org podcasts, chances are you are an enthusiastic consumer of good media.

Which is why we're here to tell you about the outlier show on maximumfund.org.

The one that just doesn't fit.

The greatest generation is a Star Trek podcast by a couple of guys who are a little bit embarrassed to have a Star Trek podcast, and that maximumfun.org is probably a little bit embarrassed to call one of its shows.

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What is this thing?

Why is it here?

Who listens?

All of these answers can be found if you subscribe to The Greatest Generation using your podcatcher or by going to maximumfun.org.

MaximumFun.org, Comedy and Culture.

Artist-owned, audience supported.

Hell yeah.

Hell yeah, pimp.

Hell yeah.

Hell yeah, player.

Yeah, yeah, hell yeah.

I love this.

I love this cap.

What is player and pimp?

What are these words?

These are old monarchy words.

Wait, no, you're not, you're dead.

Part of their chess.

You're right.

Chess pieces.

Chess pieces.

Hell yeah, night.

Hell yeah, rook.

Yeah, yeah, hell yeah, knight.

Hell yeah, rook.

Let's get that frame,

my friend here.

Oh, we have this old silver chassis from a vampire we killed.

Wow, it's very intricate.

Wait, how would a cube fit in that frame?

I don't know.

It looks like a suit of armor.

It's more of an Iron Maiden, but we've

it was outfitted.

It was outfitted as a suit of armor when a Saint Vernakian was infected with the vampiric disease

and needed to bloodlet constantly.

So

should we

narrow down what it is.

So let me further describe it.

It is a former Iron Maiden that

is a cube-shaped suit of armor that your friend can fit inside.

But they'll be pierced constantly.