
Rewind with Karen & Georgia - Episode 42: Abject Failure
It's time to Rewind with Karen & Georgia!
This week, K & G recap Episode 42: Abject Failure. In this episode, which aired days after the 2016 election, they read hilarious reviews of products on Amazon and shared six listener hometown stories. Tune in for all-new commentary, updates and much more!
Whether you've listened a thousand times or you're new to the show, join the conversation as we look back on our old episodes and discuss the life lessons we’ve learned along the way. Head to social media to share your favorite moments from this episode!
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My Favorite Murder is a true crime comedy podcast hosted by Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark. Each week, Karen and Georgia share compelling true crimes and hometown stories from friends and listeners. Since MFM launched in January 2016, Karen and Georgia have shared their lifelong interest in true crime and have covered stories of infamous serial killers like the Night Stalker, mysterious cold cases, captivating cults, incredible survivor stories, and important events from history like the Tulsa race massacre of 1921.
The Exactly Right podcast network provides a platform for bold, creative voices to bring to life provocative, entertaining and relatable stories for audiences everywhere. The Exactly Right roster of podcasts covers a variety of topics, including true crime, comedy, science, pop culture and more. Podcasts on the network include Buried Bones with Kate Winkler Dawson and Paul Holes, That's Messed Up: An SVU Podcast, This Podcast Will Kill You, Bananas and more.
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Full Transcript
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It is Wednesday, as I like to call it, Rewind's Day. I love that.
And this is a show where we recap our old episodes with all new commentary, updates, and insights. Today, we're recapping episode 42.
It's a tough one. We named it Abject Failure.
You'll see. You'll understand why once you start listening.
It's very accurate for the time. This episode came out on November 10th.
So like five days after the worst thing of all time in 2016, the vibes are bad. We are just trying to hold on,
trying to help other people hold on.
We do our best.
Let's take a moment and emotionally prepare
to listen to the intro of episode 42.
Are you going to belch?
This belch is brought to you by Chipotle. Chipotle.
When life is empty and you need beans. When your heart is empty and you need to fill your gut.
Go to Chipotle. This isn't an ad.
And fart it out. I know.
They're like, these ads are getting so casual. Oh, no.
I just feel a little broken today. Uh-huh.
Why? Oh, didn't I tell you? No, no. I've been away.
I was in New Zealand. The world's crashing down around our heads.
Oh, I didn't realize. Oh, yeah.
It's true. Well.
This is the day after, you guys. Which is one of the great nuclear war scare films
from the 80s. Oh, really? If you haven't seen it
and you want a different kind of scare
entertainment, The Day After
is one of the most upsetting things I was
left alone to watch when I was
11 years old. I feel like that is the
exact opposite
of what I need to be watching right now
considering the circumstances. Do not watch
it. Which is that,
not only did Hillary lose,
Trump won the presidency.
I'm scared of her.
Jill Stein didn't come in
as that third party candidate
to tear it away.
Not only.
I would have been fine.
It would have been fine.
Yeah.
You know, what's funny is
there is a...
Nothing at all. So let's get this done We just start fighting What's funny? That it seems like, first of all It's 100 degrees in Los Angeles today So there's a hellscape feel To all of life right now That's very surreal And it's really quiet It doesn't, I mean like because this is California, it's very quiet.
People are like... I feel like people are looking inside themselves right now.
People are devastated and I just want to hold everyone's hand that I see. Not that I left the house much today, but when I did, it was like...
I wanted to apologize to everyone who is going to be fucked, you know? Yeah. Including us.
I mean, in all different ways. But here's what I was trying to do.
This is what I did, which I never do. I was just letting everybody merge in front of me today.
Anybody that came anywhere near me with a blanker on, I was like, go ahead. I had my arm out the window.
Go ahead, everybody. Maybe we'll all be friends now.
I mean, I don't know. I was so cocky yesterday.
You know what I mean? The conversation I had with the dude I ordered lunch from was so like, he was like, I'm scared. I'm like, we're going to be fine.
We got this. Jokey joke.
And I want to go back there and be like, I'm I took your fucking worry not seriously it wasn't that you weren't taking it seriously that's what everybody was doing I feel like that's what everyone down to political polar pundits were doing the faces on Anne Maddox Maddox when she kind of realized what was going on was when I was like, goodbye, go into the wine bar. What bothers me, like, okay, so, and sorry this is becoming a political podcast, like this is just so new and we need to, I'm just like, I don't know how we're going to do this, but like it's, when Bush won, I was like, oh, well, everyone's going to see what a mistake that was because it's going to affect them.
But the people that this is going to affect aren't the people who voted for him. It's the people who aren't our minorities.
It's not going to affect anyone who voted for him. And also what's weird is there were some minorities that voted for him.
That's true. I mean, there is a...
It was a con. It's a long con.
And, you know, who knows? Who knows? Hillary said we have to give him a chance and see what happens. Who knows? But if you're stoked, if you're stoked today, you know, we envy that position that you think that you have solved a problem by putting Donald Trump into the presidency.
It must feel great. I personally was so thrilled at the idea of a woman becoming president.
Me too. It was so exciting.
Enjoy your naivety. And what's been great though is that for all the posts I've put up and on the My Favorite Murder boards and stuff, not a single person has responded and been like, fuck you.
You know,
like I think everyone who follows us for my favorite murder reasons.
Nope.
No,
no,
you saw this shit.
Yeah.
Come to Twitter.
Really?
Come to the bus stop.
That is Twitter.
See what people are really saying.
I mean, it's a nice idea,
but no.
Okay.
Which is why I don't think we should talk about politics because it's basically just telling people don't be interested in this. Okay, let's start then.
Unless you don't want to start. No, let's start the podcast.
Anything? Any housekeeping? Do you have no housekeeping? I thought I probably did yesterday. I guess that I can talk about the thing I loved, which I saw on the Facebook page, which was there was a Murderino meetup in Colorado that was so awesome.
Like I kept looking at the picture this morning. It really gave me a lot of good feeling this morning.
I went straight to that Facebook page like the second I woke up and just looked at all these people communicating with each other. And the thing that they wrote about, about this meetup of all these people talking about this thing that they're interested in, but then also talking about getting a self-defense class started.
And they all look like they're just kind of hanging with friends. They all looked looked they look like people who all went to high school together like they already looked like a group of people yeah and that's i find that incredibly touching that people to me at the end of the day that's what it's all about is like people are actually connecting with the other human beings totally i'm so happy for them yeah did i tell you speaking of, oh, I have to tell you about my acupuncturist
and how I went,
I've been seeing her for like a few,
a couple of months now for my,
the sciatica issue.
And she's been really fucking helping me.
And she's this wonderful,
like soft spoken,
sweet person.
She reminds me of like a kindergarten teacher.
Wait,
is it,
where is it?
It's in Silver Lake.
Oh,
at the Dow. It's not at the Dow of...
No. Okay.
Shout out to Holly. I came in to get my acupuncture this week, last week.
And she was like, so one of my clients knows I'm into true crime and said to me, you need to listen to this podcast. And she's like, I listened to three episodes of it before.
I was like, I wonder who these girls are. And then she's like, and then I looked at it and it was you.
She didn't even know it was me while she was listening. But she's like, I like it a lot.
And then, of course, told me her hometown murder. Where'd she from? Which was fucking awesome.
San Diego. And about like a girl who got killed from high school and her mom got killed.
And it turned out that they were into dealing drugs and shit. And the cops initially thought that it was like the serial killer that was going around at the time.
And they're like, it doesn't fit the MO, but maybe it is. And then they found out that they were dealing drugs.
Wow. I know.
Wait, that just reminded me. I had a similar experience at the rap party for my job.
Oh. I'm not going to be able to remember her name now.
It might be Cassie.
It might be something with an O.
But anyway, it was kind of...
Cassio.
It's Cassio.
I met a Cassio keyboard from the 80s.
And I put it on Bossa Nova and danced by myself at a wrap party.
Just yelling murderino.
And it was basically, oh, I get to get the murderino. Karen, stop it.
You're sober. Karen, this is why this is a wrap party.
Just yelling murderino. And it was basically, oh, I...
You're going to get to get the murderino. Karen, stop it.
You're sober. Karen, this is why this is a rap party.
It's because we all wanted... It's actually still going on.
We were just trying to convince you that it's over. We were trying to rap you personally out of this job.
We're trying to be nice, so we're making it hard. I wouldn't be surprised.
But anyway, she worked... She works...
I can't remember where. She works somehow on the show.
Sorry. Her name is something and she works.
Her name is something. She means the world to me.
She works somewhere. And she's blonde.
She was so sweet. She works for the show somehow, but like for the network or for publicity or something where it's not in our office or whatever.
Yeah. So it's okay that you didn't work with her for four months and then not know her.
Never seen her, never met her. Also, there's a chance she doesn't work on the show.
It was her roommate that works on the show now that I'm thinking about it. But end of the day, the fun part is she listened to the podcast and wanted to know what show I was working on when I would talk about it.
And then she goes, and then I saw you here. Now I know what show you've been working on.
It was very fun and exciting. I just remembered now that this fog of depression is lifting over me a little bit because I'm laughing for the first time since yesterday.
It's key. It's crucial.
It really is. So one, the Americana in Glendale, I go into Madewell who makes great jeans, great expensive jeans.
This is like my first time in my life not buying $10 jeans. And I go to put one on, I go to grab a pair and then of course the ones that are on top fall to the ground as they do.
Right as this sweet girl comes up to me to like, can I help? And I thought, I was like, I'm so sorry. I was like, I'm sorry I'm making a mess.
And she's like. I'm scared because these jeans are expensive.
Right. And I just toppled a bunch of them.
She's like, are you Georgia? And I was like, yes. And she's like, we listened to, we heard that the J.Crew shout
out that you had done. And like, we do that too.
Yes. They were so sweet.
We've spread to the
Americana. So the Americana made well, ladies, what's up? Shout out.
Hi girls and guys. And
then yesterday, I think I just met girls. So it's okay.
Yesterday I went to the French restaurant
in Echo Park to try to watch the end of the world. And it was too crowded for me, but I was
Thank you. Okay.
Yesterday, I went to this French restaurant in Echo Park to try to watch the end of the world.
And it was too crowded for me.
But as I walk in, this table, like, hi at me.
And I just hide back because I don't ever recognize anyone, you know, and they're like, murdery.
And I was like, oh, good.
I don't know.
And they were just random fucking.
Wow.
Jesus.
So that's three.
Yeah.
And then as I left immediately, because it was too crowded, I made the m mime of I'm going to go slit my wrist somewhere else at them. Bye.
And then I did. A real fun face.
I'm going to go that, I'm going to go commit suicide. I'm going to go ahead and go down the street where it's quiet.
Well, I like that. I feel like this part of the podcast might, to an outsider, seem self-indulgent.
But as we have had to answer in even that, what I'm trying to say is that this is very new to us. And so when these things happen, it's still hilarious and fun for us.
It's exciting and exciting. And, um, it's its own, you know, it's like greetings corner or whatever.
It's like meeting friends you didn't know you had. And it's so exciting just to be like, to meet these like cool people who are, no one's been crazy to me yet.
They're all there. There are very few crazy ones.
And then when it stretches out to like my fucking acupuncturist who by all accounts is like a nice, normal human being. And she's like, I like it.
What are the chances? She's supposed to be like mind-body. And then she's like mind-body murder.
Totally is. Yeah.
I mean, what we're saying is there's fucking nice people everywhere. And it's nice to know.
And it's nice to remind each other. And keep saying hi.
And we'll try to do the same. And maybe remember your name or where you worked.
She was the nicest person. She seems nice.
The one I can't remember. Cassie.
Callie. Someone, she looked like she was from the Midwest.
She was so happy. Cassio.
I feel like, you know, let's talk about something else. Let's call it awful.
Let's talk about another, like let's get our minds off an awful life. Here's a transitional awful topic.
Okay. The woman who was found chained like a dog inside the metal container.
Right. In North Carolina.
They have found four bodies on the property. Four bodies buried.
And. So far.
That fucking Amazon shit. Oh yes.
That's so many people sent me that. you look at it yes i didn't look at it so this guy who's like by all accounts a serial killer yeah who already had a record for a child molestation rape at gunpoint rape at gunpoint somehow that's just again let's just make everything awful yeah he has been commenting on the tools he's used to kill people and chain them up on Amazon, reviewing them and saying shit like, I haven't killed anyone with this yet, but when I do, this will be a great tool.
Like straight up admitting like this chain, this padlock is great for chaining people. Like, dude.
I think it's still up there too. I think the cops are looking into it.
So they haven't taken them down yet maybe. That's, I feel like that's second only to my favorite internet comments, which are on those sugar-free gummy bears.
Oh my God. Which is, now let just turn this around here.
Here's we're going to,
we're going to just, we're mining for positivity today. Should I find a couple? Um, yeah.
Yes. If you want to.
So, and I'll just, I'm sure everybody knows this because it's kind of legendary, but if you don't, I don't think a lot of people know this. So they, these, this gummy bear company made their own version of sugar-free gummy bears and they were for sale on Amazon and the reviews for the sugar-free
gummy bears and they were for sale on Amazon. And the reviews for these sugar-free gummy bears that contain some chemical...
It's called sugar alcohol. Okay.
So sugar alcohol apparently makes you shit your pants. It does.
So there are reviews where people were like, oh my God, I was shitting all day. Like people just talking about these gummy bears just wreaking havoc on their intestinal system and they just get more ridiculous and poetic as they go.
People are really like being, there's a lot, there's a few different places of like products that people will pick up on and cover. Like there's like a single Bic pen and it's just like people are talking about time travel and what the Bic pen has done for them.
This makes me happy. It's kind of gross.
Do it. Well, here's one.
Be sure to also buy a tub of OxyClean with this to get the blood and diarrhea stains out of your underwear, clothes, furniture, pets, loved ones, ceiling fans. Let's see.
Oh my God, everything previously written is true. It's all true.
Don't eat more than 15 in a sitting unless you were trying to power wash your intestines. The cramping started about an hour later and soon enough I was as bloated as a balloon in Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade.
When the rumbling started, I sprinted down the hallway and made it to the bathroom just in time for the four horsemen of the apocalypse to stampede from my backside, laying waste to my home septic system and my will to live. After three hours of a pelvis-shaking gummy bear assault, I was spongy and weak, surprised that I had any bones left.
I cursed Haribo, Haribo. Haribo, that's a good thing.
Yes, with the little strength I could muster. But here's the cool thing about them, is that people, and it's in the reviews, people with really bad illnesses who get constipated, I think chemo makes you unable to shit.
You are now like recommending them.
Take two, like post.
Yes.
Yes.
Like it's relieving constipation.
I sat in, my friend Stephanie and I sat in her car one day
and I just read them and we were both crying.
We were just crying laughing.
There's a banana slicer.
That's a good one too.
If you ever get sad and bored tonight. Banana slicer reviews? There's banana slicer reviews that are just hilarious.
Nice. What was I going to say? Yeah.
Don't eat sugar alcohol. Be careful.
It's in a lot of stuff and I've eaten it before and it makes you so bloated. You're in so much pain.
Wow. I've never even heard of that.
Yeah. It's in a lot of stuff and you think, oh, it's just sugar because it says sugar alcohol.
It's fucking terrible. Wow.
It's like a sugar substitute? Yeah.
It's like a... I think it's an
extraction of
sugar that they take and they're like,
it's sugar free. Oh, right.
Yeah. Don't eat that.
Just eat sugar. Guys,
just use sugar ultimately
at the end of the day except for those of you who have quit sugar. Karen.
Name Karen. I'm proud.
I'm so impressed with you. Thank you.
As a sugar addict. Well, once it's out of your system, you don't crave it anymore.
That's the shocking part. But what if I still crave cake? Like I don't want sugar, but I want cake.
You know what I mean? It's like a different... You're making up what's going to happen to you?
Yeah. Is that what you're saying?
Well, like,
I know you don't crave sugar.
Like, you're not like,
I want something sweet,
but I want cake.
It's a different thing.
No, but it's like,
I want a piece of cake.
Yeah.
Well, that's just an idea.
That's true.
That may need to go
psychological for,
not just...
Yeah.
I mean, I think all of it's
kind of psychological.
Yeah.
Should we just not talk about murder? I don't't know I feel like it's like yeah that sucks we've touched upon it I mean we really have we've danced around it a lot let's have this one be all about let's just read funny reviews this whole episode I mean I wouldn't mind it we kind of could um do you want to look at the banana slicer yes let me see if i can find any do you want me to read you another yes okay i have a good one but it's also like is it better than what's happening right now i want to read a good one um okay after a few hours i had an extreme buildup of gas with no relief. All I could was lay down and pray for a fart.
That might sound funny, but when you've eaten something that has basically turned you into the blueberry girl from Willy Wonka, you're pleading with your life. Violet Beauregard is her name.
Oh. There's like, okay, I want to find the Bic Pen one.
Let's see. I just found Banana Slicer.
Okay is a BuzzFeed article so you can actually find it it's the article called Amazon reviews of this plastic banana slicer are just the best so here's the first one for decades I've been trying to come up with an ideal way to slice a banana use a knife they say they say. Well, my parole officer won't allow me to be around knives.
Shoot it with a gun.
Background check, hello.
I had to resort to carefully attempt
to slice those bananas with my bare hands.
99.9% of the time,
I would just get so frustrated
that I just ended up squishing the fruit in my hands
and throwing it against the wall in anger.
Then after a fit of banana-induced rage,
my parole officer introduced me to this kitchen Marvel and my life was changed. What can I say about this five, seven, one B banana slicer that hasn't already been said about the wheel penicillin or the iPhone.
This is one of the greatest inventions of all time. My husband and I would argue constantly over, over who had to cut the day's banana slices.
No one. It's one of those chores no one wants to do.
You know, the old, I spend the entire day rearing our children. Maybe you can pitch in and cut these bananas.
And of course, you think I have the energy to slave over your damn bananas. I worked a 12-hour shift just to come on to this.
I mean, this fucking thing goes on for like seven more paragraphs. I love it.
All right, let me find one. Banana Slicer.
It's like a play. It's like people getting their creativity out on Amazon.
Okay, the 10 best... Here's the Thought Catalog has the 10 best reviews for a big pens for her.
Someone has answered my gentle prayers and finally designed a pen that I can use all month long. I use it when I'm swimming, riding a horse, walking on the beach and doing yoga.
It's comfortable, leak-proof, non-slip, and it makes me feel so feminine and pretty. Since I've been using these pens, men have found me more attractive and approachable.
It's given me soft skin and manageable hair, and it has really given me the self-esteem I needed to start a book club and flirt with the bag boy at my local market. My drawings of kittens and ponies have improved and now that I'm writing my last name hyphenated with Robert Patterson's last name, I really believe he may someday marry me.
I'm positively giddy. Those smart men in marketing have come up with a pen that my lady parts can really identify with.
Where has this pen been all my life? That's the big pen for her. For her.
And it's like pink and purple. Probably a piece of shit pink pen with.
Oh my God. So stupid.
I do think we should do murders. Okay.
I mean, just because there's some Trump lovers who are like, hey, can I have my favorite show? Hey, why can't I have what I want? Oh, right. In 2016 America.
Wait a second. I want something.
Give it to me now. Cut that part out, Steven.
No, don't. I want something.
Give it to me now. And we're back.
Why didn't we just turn this podcast into a reading reviews podcast? You know how much easier lives would have been? I mean, the work is done for you.
You're just printing stuff up.
I mean, that is still a great idea.
Yeah, come on.
Let's podcast seven days a week.
Well, the Haribo people stopped offering reduced sugar products.
That whole thing was a bit of a mini scandal.
And then I think they were like, oh, we can't use that chemical anymore.
Oh, too bad for them. Man, that bottom line is disappointed in that.
Right. You know, and that's really all that matters.
This is so weird. It's like, it just feels like deja vu.
And like, we are so hopeful that like, we're trying to look at the positive. We're trying not to be too, too political, which is hilarious because we are now.
I mean, there's no way around it. Yeah.
We have learned our lesson about scandal and online meltdown cancellation. So no one's trying to be the subject of that ever again.
No, we're trying to be even, but I feel like that went away pretty quick after this. So yeah, which I'm happy about.
It's a weird thing. Yeah.
Fascism. It's
super weird. It's just weird.
Yeah. And it's like a double.
It's been doubled down now. So yeah.
Yeah. You know, here we are.
Now we're just all kind of like I look at my phone while I watch TV while I'm chewing on something that's usually getting me through. It helps.
Dogs and cats help, I think animals for sure.
Friends.
Speaking of friends,
this episode is all hometowns that you. getting me through.
It helps. Dogs and cats help, I think.
Animals. For sure.
Friends. Speaking of
friends, this episode is all hometowns that you guys wrote in. This is the first time that we had the idea just to do hometowns.
And because I think we were kind of busy that week and devastated, we let you guys do the homework. So let's get into the series of hometowns.
Hey, Karen, I want you to picture yourself going for a drive. What comes to mind? Not ever being able to merge on any freeway in Los Angeles and potholes and crying.
Oh, yeah. Well, the truth is the road can feel like it's out to get you at every turn.
But Karen, it doesn't have to be this way. Because Hyundai's available advanced safety technology is designed to help keep you protected from all of life's twists and turns.
Their vehicles offer available features designed to help safeguard you and your loved ones. You can change lanes with confidence thanks to the available Blind Spot View Monitor, which actually shows you a live video feed of your blind spots.
The standard forward collision avoidance assist can help prevent or mitigate accidents by alerting you of imminent collision. Oh my God, this happens to me all the time.
And automatically applying the brakes if you don't. This is needed.
Hyundai vehicles are equipped with a standard driver attention warning system, which constantly monitors your attention levels. Oh my God.
Once detected, it sounds alerts and visual cues to help bring your focus back to
the road. Oh my God.
I mean, get this for me right now. With available class-exclusive safety features, Hyundai helps to keep you safe so you can enjoy the drive.
Learn more about Hyundai at HyundaiUSA.com or call 562-314-4603 for complete details.
That's hyundaiusa.com or call 562-314-4603 for complete details. That's H-Y-U-N-D-A-I-U-S-A dot com or call 562-314-4603.
Goodbye. There are probably a billion furniture options out there.
We didn't count, but that number feels right. So how do you find the perfect piece? Easy.
You go to Article. Article believes in delightful design for every home.
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Check out their near-addresser. It's beautiful and practical, which is a deadly combination.
You know we're hard stans of Article on this podcast. Everyone knows that.
We're like BFFs. I mean, we couldn't rave more.
And it's because everything is so classy, so beautifully made, affordable, and so user-friendly. You don't have to have style to get stylish stuff from Article.
They do it for you. So there's no worry there.
Look at that Neera dresser on their website. Just go and take a look at that one piece piece and you will see what we are talking about.
It is as mid-century as you could get. Seriously.
Article is offering our listeners $50 off your first purchase of $100 or more. To claim, visit article.com slash murder and the discount will be automatically applied at checkout.
That's A-R-T-I-C-L-E dot com slash murder to get $50 off your first purchase of $100 or more. Goodbye.
As the weather starts to get warmer and we can finally go places again, it's time to face a hard truth. Your travel wardrobe is not ready.
You can't bring bad fashion on your vacation. They won't let you out of the airport.
Fortunately, we all have Quince. They have high quality travel essentials at fair prices.
With Quince, you can get quality luxury essentials without a hefty price tag, like lightweight European linen styles from $30, washable silk tops, and comfy lounge sets. And Quince also has premium luggage options and stylish tote bags to carry it all.
Everything is priced 50% to 80% less than similar brands because Quince works directly with top factories. They cut out the middleman and pass the savings on to you.
Georgia, I don't want to brag or anything, but I just got a box of three brand new Quince sweaters because I wear my $50 Mongolian cashmere sweaters that I got years ago so much that I was finally like, I need to freshen this up a little bit. For your next trip, treat yourself to the luxe upgrades you deserve from Quince.
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I'll go first this week. Please.
Instead of asking, I'll volunteer. Please.
I'll throw myself in front of the train. Please.
All right. So then this week, we're just going to read your hometown murders.
Yeah. As our main thing.
Yeah. Oh, this starts off with a very professional note.
And it says, in the note, colon, in the unlikely event you refer to this story on air or publicly, please do not share my name or email address. Anonymous is good enough.
I love your podcast and look forward to each one every week. Thanks for being awesome.
Let's give out that email address. I love that it's so reasonable.
It's exactly what I needed that first time. I gave that woman's full information.
There's a second piece of information
there that I'll tell you after the podcast that's really good, but I don't think I should read it since I think it would indicate who this person is. Is it a famous person? They have a connection to a famous serial killing team.
And their email address is justin at timberlake.com. His publicist is a real B.
So we give out his... All right.
So here's what Anonymous has to say. My parents moved us to the Santa Clarita Valley near Magic Mountain and the site of the San Francisco Dam disaster in 1988.
Santa Clarita was an underdeveloped and had a lot of wooded hills and was more of a small town. People noticed new people moving in and local shops would call you by your first name.
We didn't even have to lock our car doors. That's what my time was like.
In 1989, a little girl named Sarah Hodges disappeared in Newhall. She was only seven years old and her parents assumed that she had maybe wandered off and gotten hurt or was at a friend's house and hadn't told them.
A citywide search was immediately put into place, including house to house searches, dogs, mounted police helicopters, neighborhood volunteers searching the brush and woods. One of the volunteers was her 14 year old neighbor named Curtis Cooper.
Curtis had been living with his father in Florida until a few months before and now lived with his mom, Crystal, in a room she rented from Mrs. Kazmar.
It was rumored that Curtis and Crystal both slept in the same large waterbed in a single room. Mrs.
Kazmar's house was five doors away from Sarah's house. Curtis used to play with Sarah and sometimes went horseback riding with her and was one
of the first to volunteer for her when she disappeared.
Red flag.
This sounds familiar.
It does.
I think you've done this one.
Did I do the one where he-
Because it's waterbed.
Oh, no, because he lived in a house with them.
No, yeah.
But it's very familiar, very similar to the murder I did once.
Yeah.
It's slightly older boy and little girl. And waterbed.
And waterbed. Holy shit.
Totally same thing. Okay.
The dogs, the mounted police, the neighbors, and the house-to-house search, including Mrs. Casimar's house, turned up nothing.
Sarah's face was everywhere, and she was the talk of the schools. She was the lead news story every night, and in all the papers, how could a seven-year-old just disappear in this small sleepy shit kickery
town? Shortly after Sarah
disappeared, the Coopers had a fan blowing
out their window running day and night.
Mrs. Kazmar thought it was odd
that the fan was blowing out instead
of in and that it was
going all the time. She also began to smell
something foul from the Coopers' room
and finally went to investigate
while they were both out. Hell yeah, Mrs.
Kazmar. Rock the
Kazmar.
See you later. smell something foul from the Cooper's room, and finally went to investigate while they were both out.
Hell yeah, Mrs. Kazmar.
Rock the Kazmar.
See, you still got it.
You still got it.
Just always.
Rock the Kazmar.
Four days after she had disappeared, Mrs. Kazmar,
some reports say it was Crystal,
found the fully clothed decomposing body of Sarah Hodges.
She was wedged between the wall and the headboard of the waterbed. She was in there with both of them? Yeah, Curtis and Crystal had slept with Sarah beneath their heads with the fan blowing for three days.
What the fuck? At first, the news reported that maybe Sarah had been playing hide-and-go-seek and had wedged herself into tightly and snapped her neck. That was a story the Coopers were selling anyway.
However, an examination revealed Sarah had been strangled and sexually assaulted.
It was thought that she was murdered in Curtis's room
and hidden there only a few hours before the deputies searched the house.
Oh my God.
It turns out that Curtis had been in trouble in Florida
and had been arrested for committing several petty thefts and burglaries
and basically had to leave.
Curtis claimed he had been looking for help for years
Thank you. Turns out that Curtis had been in trouble in Florida and had been arrested for committing several petty thefts and burglaries and basically had to leave.
Curtis claimed he had been looking for help for years for his, quote, severe emotional problems. But in Florida, he was, quote, shifted from agency to agency without ever receiving proper treatment.
Apparently, whatever Curtis had done, it was bad enough for Florida not to want him. That's what he wrote.
The person wrote that. and i guess it was according to the deputy district attorney who prosecuted him curtis had planned the murder about a week before it occurred planned it planned it and also planned but never carried out carried out a similar murder two years earlier while in florida when he would have been around 12 or 13 holy shit rosenberg uh but, uh, oh, that deputy district attorney had claimed that Curtis had a belief that he had to kill to have sexual relations.
Although he was found by the court experts to have some brain damage, it was not enough for an insanity defense. Curtis was convicted of a murder with a special allegation of sexual assault and received 25 years to life, although California Youth Authority could only actually hold him
until he's 25, which would
have been in the year 2000.
Oh my God. Four months after
Sarah was found, her father went
to her gravesite, sat vigil all night,
then shot and killed himself over her
grave. He was only 36 years old.
Oh, honey. All of them.
Oh, Anonymous. That was a really good good email who was molesting that kid then you know like you don't just become a sexual predator at 12 i mean he lived in florida any fucking thing that it could have been like a clown in his closet the worst things happen there this will just go to show you how important it is to fund mental health facilities
and get people that
mental health for the government to
not defund and all
the... Goodbye.
It's already been defunded. We haven't had that
in so long. That's fair, but it's
going to get worse. But I think under this new Trump presidency,
it's going to come back. Yeah.
No, for sure.
I feel like
that empathetic, you know, hold up your brother, care for others. Positive works.
It's going to be happening. Yeah.
It's going to be beautiful. It's a brand new day.
All right. This is from Jacqueline.
And of course I read this because all cap subject line is Adirondack nightmare, full on fucked up. Ladies, hello.
Love the podcast, obviously, but I'll get right to the point here. My brother told me the story yesterday about his fiance's cousin.
Fasten your seatbelts, motherfuckers. She wrote motherfuckers.
My soon-to-be sister-in-law's cousin was going through some shit, so her dad suggested she go up to their house in the Adirondacks for a few days to clear her head. God, that sounds nice, doesn't it? I would love to be there right this second.
Let's go. Because also, it wouldn't be 105.
It also wouldn't be 105. And then also, that would mean someone had money in your family, because having a house in the Adirondacks, that's got to be fancy.
I mean, don't they have their own chair? The Adirondacks even have their own chair. It's an area of the country that has its own chair.
And it's a comfy chair. How rich do you have to be? Like it's a chair that's supposed to, you're supposed to have a mojito in one hand.
Yes. You know what I mean? It's a relaxing in the summertime chair.
Absolutely. She went out for a long weekend, had been hearing some noises in the vents and just around the house, but she knew her dad had been having issues with squirrels in the house recently.
I bet it's not squirrels.
It's not squirrels.
So she didn't think anything of it and just wrote it off for a few days.
Bad idea.
Bad idea.
Yeah.
Finally, after a few days, she calls her dad and tells him about the noises she's been hearing.
And he tells her just to call the police to sort it out, as you do.
She's reluctant at first because she doesn't want to bother the police if it's nothing and then she wrote, fuck politeness. But her dad...
I don't want to bother the police. I don't want to bother the police's job it is to check things out.
Yeah. So I'm just going to get murdered.
I don't know if that's true. But her dad convinces her to call so she does.
Listen to a man when he tells you what to do. Oh man.
She tells the police... We deal and they say, sure, we'll come check it out.
Are you alone in the house? To which she replies, yes. And they say, okay, no problem.
We'll come check it out. Just give us a few hours.
Nowhere than five minutes later, a squad of police cars roll up to her house, lights and sirens ablaze, and then tell her to get out of the house now. Come outside.
Turns out there was a fucking man in her basement the entire time building a fucking cage to fucking keep her in. What? He was building the cage in her house? She had gone on a date with this man a few weeks prior and he had been stalking her ever since.
He followed her upstate and casually fucking began building a goddamn cage to keep her in. This is her writing? This is all her.
In the basement of her own house. I wish I'd say this for last because how are we going to beat this? No, I know.
This is the one to beat. The cops were able to figure it out because when she told them she was alone in the house, they saw or heard, I'm not sure, that someone else was on the phone line in the house.
When I'm yelling, it's all her all caps, but also me freaking the fuck out. They saw that someone else was on the phone line in the house.
That's some straight out of a scary story you tell at a slumber party shit, she says. That is, it's like, that's an urban legend.
For sure. Yeah.
She probably made it up. Easy, easy.
Sorry. I don't mean Jackie.
I mean, this is, no, I'm sure she's fine. The creepiest thing to me is that this dickweed had plenty of time to do whatever he wanted with this girl, but he was keeping her like a pet until the very right moment to do God knows what.
Thank God nothing happened to her and she was able to stay sexy and not get cage murdered.
Keep up the good work, ladies.
Bye.
Oh, my God.
Thank you, Jackie.
Jackie, that was nuts.
Epic.
Do you want to know what that reminded me of? Yes. I just had a recovered memory.
Something happened to you? Yes. But it doesn't...
Clearly, it's not going to end as good. I would hope it's not.
It's not. Similar.
But this was... I came home from being...
So after I lived in Sacramento, I moved back home to live with my parents for a year because I had failed college. I had failed life.
And so I had to go back home and live with my parents to just be a failure. That's always fun.
I did that too. But I would drive up to Sacramento to hang out with my friends because my whole social circle was like an hour and a half away.
Really sucked a lot. So this one time I came home and I was going to go downtown to meet somebody.
I can't remember. It was like a bar or whatever.
And I was blow drying my hair. And also we had this cat that was acting crazy, just being super weird and flinching and doing weird shit.
And I kept going like, what is, why are you doing that? And so I heard a loud noise while I was blow drying my hair. So I turned the blow door off and I just stand there and then I'm hearing like very faint noises.
So like a tick here, almost like house settling. Yeah, like someone moving slowly through the house.
Yeah, or just the house settling. Like I can't tell.
So I go into my parents' room and they had a their closet had its own door on it. And I go to open the door.
No, don't open it. And it won't open.
It's like someone's pushing back on the door. Karen! And so I run out of the house, get into my car.
Oh my God, I'm going to cry. And drive to my old house because this was the house we moved into when I was a teen.
In the city. Exactly.
I drive out to... And this is also...
You know what? Maybe I wasn't going out because it was like late at night. It was like 11 o'clock at night.
I go out to my old neighbor, Andy Withington's and I wake him up. Him and his roommate, Craig, were like sleeping in this weird part of their house.
And I'm like, there's someone in my house. You have to come with me.
I get them to come back to the house with me. They're all like buoyed up.
Yeah. Yeah, let's check this shit out.
We go in. We're looking around everywhere.
And then Andy goes to open that door, the closet door. And he opens it.
And it like kind of stuck. So I was like, oh, that's probably what it was.
And then as we're both standing, he's like, it was stuck. You're so stupid.
And I'm like, oh yeah. And then I look up and there's one of those attic holes.
And the attic hole thing is turned to the side. And I was just like, look, I just pointed up at him and he's like, holy fuck.
And we ran out and called 911. Oh my God.
And the Petaluma police because it's a tiny town were there like literally like in two minutes there was a cop walking in my backyard. Holy shit.
Like sneaking around. It was crazy.
And then I had to give this whole thing and there was no one there and it was no one and it was nothing. And I don't know why.
They looked up in the attic, like they looked everywhere and it was nothing. It was something.
It was so crazy and scary. Also because in between the time where I thought someone was pushing back on my parents' closet door, jumping into the car and driving out to the country to get Andy Withington was like one of the scariest things I've ever done.
Oh, because you're like, someone's following me or in my backseat. Or just what is happening.
But that doesn't make it... Okay.
That doesn't make any sense that both those things happened together, especially the second part. The only thing is the second part, it could have already been like that.
And I just never knew. It was like one of those things you don't notice.
So what did your parents say? My dad's like, you need to take it easy. Of course.
Thanks, dad. My dad's like, drama.
Oh, yeah. Men fucking belittling women.
This was the one that Georgia just got. Militant.
Are you ready for everything you could ever want in a murder story? Yeah. Because that's what I got right here from Lauren.
Cool. She said, okay, this may end up a little long, but it's totally worth it.
I grew up in a small Northwest suburb of Chicago. My whole life, I've been hearing about the Columbo murders.
It happened around the corner from the house I grew up in, but I wasn't born until 10 years later. Here goes.
In 1976, Patti Columbo and her loser boyfriend, DeLuca, broke into the home she grew up in and murdered her mother, father, and 13-year-old brother. The father, Frank, was shot by DeLuca and then bludgeoned with a bowling trophy by Patti.
Ooh, that's symbolic. That's not good.
Patti's mom, Mary, was found cowering in the bathroom.
She was shot between the eyes,
which medical examiners said killed her
before she even hit the floor,
and then her throat was slit.
Oh, honey.
You know, just to be sure.
Here's the most fucked up part,
and this is bad because it's her 13-year-old brother.
Yeah.
Her brother, Michael, 13,
had slept through the initial attack,
so Patty and her boyfriend, DeLuca,
woke him up by shooting at him. Then Patty stabbed her brother, Michael, 13, had slept through the initial attack, so Patty and her boyfriend, DeLuca, woke him up by shooting at him.
Then Patty stabbed her brother 87 times with sewing scissors. Oh, my God.
When he was found, officers thought he had a case of the measles, but then they realized his measles were little gashes all over his body. Holy shit.
Patty and DeLuca then set the thermostat to 97 and left the house. The bodies weren't found until three days later.
When Patty was informed of the murders, instead of rushing to their side, she started pointing fingers to potential leads and even tried to tie the mob, Chicago, what up, tie in the mob, sorry. At the funeral, she was openly flirting with detectives who with a detective who was playing the role to make Patty crack after more digging they found a bunch of fucked up shit like a film of Patty having sex with DeLuca's German shepherd oh no oh no and then in she wrote, like, how does that even work? Oh, no.
Oh, no, Lauren. This is terrible.
This is terrible. Keep going.
Well, oh, so her boyfriend, Patty's boyfriend, was 36 and she was 16. Shut up.
Yep. Ew.
And he was married with five kids. What the fuck? Can you imagine? So I'm 36, married with five kids, dating a 16-year-old.
16-year-old. All of that, including the kids, sounds impossible.
It sounds so boring to me. Yep.
A 16-year-old, you'd be like, aside from Pokemon Go, what do you like? Or like aside from the shooting video game or virtual reality? I don't know. Killing your family.
Wearing neon pink sunglasses all the time. Oh, you were naming the other thing they like.
Oh, yeah. Killing your whole family.
I was just naming that um what more is there than me on pink sunglasses now she's a model prisoner who can't read patty is she's still in jail hmm what year oh man fuck everything uh oh they got indeterminate life sentences which really means 200 to 300 years holy shit so good a little justice got served there. Oh, she also ran a prostitution ring in jail.
What? This woman sounds diabolical. She's like trying to take the devil's place.
Yeah. She's trying to out evil.
Good God. Everyone.
I mean, Lauren, when you said this, it had everything you could ever want in a murder story. It had a lot of things I did not want.
Yeah. Did not want.
That's true. Have never wanted.
Totally. Okay.
This one is from Mary and it's called my husband's murder house. Hey, George and Karen, I've been binging on your podcast over the past two months on my drive to and from work.
Since I tote my puppy with me so that I can drop him off at doggy daycare, he's been binge listening too. And his cute puppy face makes it easier to get through the more depressing parts of your podcast.
Picture, please. You two are hilarious though, and I feel much better trained to avoid ever getting murdered.
Thanks. Okay.
So she has two murders. Let's just try this one and see if it's good enough to get to the second one.
Yeah. The first took place in my husband's previous house and he, my husband, met the murderer.
My husband sold his home near Columbus, South Carolina to Shedrick and Kia Miller, that sound made up, in 2012, about a year before we met. The couple appeared to be very happy and moved into the house with their two small children.
Skip ahead a year or so. In January 2014, Shutterick's mother hadn't heard from him in several days and went to his house to check on him.
She found the two children, age three and one, so sad, dead in their beds, and the couple dead in their bed just down the hall. According to the police investigation, the mother and two children had been shot in the head by the father husband and then Shutterick turned the gun on himself and committed suicide.
A little crazy to believe, especially since no one suspected anything was wrong with the family. They held Bible studies in their home and church members said they didn't show any signs of having problems.
Same from the neighbors. What about holding Bible studies in your home? What about inviting people into your home? Like fucking psychopaths.
Get out of my home. I mean, I'm getting my carpet clean and I want to charge tomorrow.
And I want to charge everyone who's ever been in my apartment to get my carpet clean. Oh, that's a good idea.
Isn't it? Yeah. I'll give you like $7.
Perfect. Thank you.
Steven, you in for a couple bucks? I'll give you five. Thank you.
Oh yeah. Okay.
Let's see. Kia's sister came forward shortly after though and stated that Kia had talked to her about Shudderick's overbearing control of her but that since he wasn't violent towards her, Kia thought she'd be okay.
One positive of the story is that Kia's sister is now sharing her sister's abuse story and her own experiences in an abusive relationship with others in an effort to help women in the same situation. The other story is a little more unnerving for me and a warning to
single ladies to be very careful about who you get involved with. I'm sorry, I have to read it.
The other story is more unnerving than the story you just read?
I think, should I? You might as well. I mean, this is a fucking, yeah.
This is a fucking shit show. This is an everything is going wrong.
Episode 42 is an abject failure. Yep.
This episode is going to be called Abject Failure. Right? Yes.
The victim, Jennifer Wilson, was my professor for a graduate course course and i want to express that she was an intelligent compassionate caring and beautiful woman who i had the greatest respect for i'm gonna guess she's dead now probably i mean uh anyways and she just talks about something totally different yeah uh and the loss of her life impacted a lot of people she was brutally killed by hank hayes on in 2011. She had met Hank Hayes through a dating site and they dated on and off for a little while.
Hayes, H-A-W-E-S is Hayes or is that Hayes, right? How? Hayes? H-A-W-E-S? Uh-huh. Haas? Haas.
Was a little obsessed with Jennifer though and not in a good way. I mean, one's a good way.
I mean... She picked up on this and made an effort to end the relationship, but he refused to let her move on.
He would constantly text her and wouldn't leave her alone. He showed up to her home in the middle of the night, one evening, and attacked her.
One of her neighbors heard her pleading for her life and called the police. When they arrived, Jennifer had been stabbed 12 times in her neck and upper body and had defensive wounds on her arms.
Her body and hair had been clean. She was unclothed, wrapped in a duvet cover and placed on her couch.
Haas was still in the home, his clothes soaked in blood and he had slit his wrist in an attempt to commit suicide. He was tried for Jennifer's murder and it only took the jury 30 minutes to determine he was guilty.
He is currently serving a life sentence without parole. Ugh, what a wrenched man.
Ladies, watch out for yourselves. Hug your puppies and cats and don't get murdered.
Thanks again for the awesome podcast, Mary. I feel like I saw that story where the guy is like on an ID channel,
like some kind of stalking show.
Yeah.
Because...
Oh, yeah.
There's those stalked,
awful stalked shows.
I mean, they have every version
of every horrible thing
that's happened to people
as a series.
This is a bleep,
Did I Marry?
I mean...
That's a show.
What about Swampkin
or something like that?
Or Swamp...
Swamp Killers or something.
Swamp Killers.
Just only murders in swamps. They have just ones of siblings only.
What else is there? People who have used mason jars only to kill people. Oh, you mean the Martha Stewart murders? It's called the shabby chic murders.
She thought she was classy, but she was just cheap. Turns out she wanted a light stain on her old bookcase.
And that would be the end of her. But instead, this stain was of blood on her carpet.
It would be fun to be one of those voiceover people for the ID channel. Because you kind of talk like this, and then you talk like this.
And the reality is. And then it's scary down here.
Everything's fine, and you're wonderful. But then.
But then you go into the basement. And something happens.
Okay, we're back from a really solid set of hometowns in which one of them, yes, is definitely a creepypasta fake fucking story that I've had. Yeah, that happens.
The thing is, we're not 14. No.
So we won't have our eye out for things like that. As soon as I was re-listening to it, I was like, how did I not know? He was not building a cage in the basement and called the cops and the cops and like, what the fuck? But it's not unreasonable because then I go on to tell the Todd Kolup murder story, who is a person who kept women in, basically in containers.
What are those things called? Shipping containers. It's not out of the question.
That's a really good point. I think what we learned is that at all if anyone's sister-in-law said this is true it's not true we need it from like the first the source or like the next door neighbor not the like yeah when it's too perfect a like plot with the details too perfectly creepy yeah and it's not first person yeah or like Or like some sort of, you can pin it here.
Once removed.
That's all we can do.
Right.
We need to verify and we're supposed to trust,
but we don't.
That's how we do it over here. But there are some updates.
My second story was about the Columbo murders.
The update is just that Frank DeLuca died in prison in 2023
and Patty Columbo is still in prison.
She was just denied parole in 2024. So yeah, horrifying.
Yeah. All right, let's get into more hometowns.
Hey, Karen, I want you to picture yourself going for a drive. What comes to mind? Not ever being able to merge on any freeway in Los Angeles and potholes and crying.
Oh, yeah. Well, the truth is the road can feel like it's out to get you at every turn, but Karen, it doesn't have to be this way.
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You can change lanes with confidence thanks to the available Blind Spot View Monitor, which actually shows you a live video feed of your blind spots. The standard forward collision avoidance assist can help prevent or mitigate accidents by alerting you of imminent collision.
Oh my God, this happens to me all the time. And automatically applying the brakes if you don't.
This is needed. Hyundai vehicles are equipped with a standard driver attention warning system, which constantly monitors your attention levels.
Oh my God. Once detected, it sounds alerts and visual cues to help bring your focus back to the road.
Oh my God. I mean, get this for me right now.
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That's H-Y-U-N-D-A-I-U-S-A.com or call 562-314-4603. Goodbye.
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Goodbye.
Do you want to do one more or are you done-y done-y done?
I mean, let's see.
I think I marked one more.
Okay.
Why don't you, let's see.
Why don't you.
Why don't. Oh, wait why don't you why don't
oh wait I just found another one
okay you go
ready oh this is
this is one that I got excited
when I saw because
it we already talked
about this but it's firsthand
so it's from Stephanie and the
subject line is the story is everything my favorite
murder dreams slash nightmares are made
of hello ladies first and
foremost I love your podcast and I can't get enough
Thank you. It says from Stephanie.
And the subject line is, the story is everything my favorite murder dreams slash nightmares are made of. Hello, ladies.
First and foremost, I love your podcast and I can't get enough. I recently started listening and got my mom hooked too.
Yay. I'm pretty sure.
Hi. I'm pretty sure my husband is deeply unsettled by this and doesn't understand my true crime fascination.
I feel like that's a trifecta. Someone finds it, they tell their mom their husband is freaked out by them them.
That keeps happening. I love it.
I think that's how great marriages are built. So my hometown murder is probably something you've seen in the news recently.
And it takes place mainly in Spartanburg, South Carolina. I said North, but it's South.
Yes. Todd Kohlhepp has been charged with kidnapping Kala Brown or Kayla Brown, Kala, and keeping her chained by the neck and ankles for two months inside a metal storage container on his property.
Did I mention Kayla lived down the street from me in Anderson, South Carolina? As if it wasn't horrifying enough. Turns out he's a full-fledged serial killer and a bunch of bodies and they found a bunch of bodies buried on his property.
In 1987, Todd Kohlhepp was convicted in Arizona for kidnapping and sexually assaulting a 14-year-old girl. He was only 15 at the time of the crime.
What? Oh, I didn't see that. It's really nice when we talk vaguely about something and then someone comes in with the facts and fills them in for us.
It's great. And we don't even have to do any research.
I love this. Me too.
Colop served 14 years in prison for this crime and registered as a sex offender when he got out. He decided to resettle in South Carolina where he purchased 100 secluded acres of land.
That's always a good sign. Red flag.
Red flag. Add that to the red flag list.
It's long. Secluded acres of land.
Over 10 secluded acres.
You don't need it. You don't need that many.
I don't even know what that looks like.
It's really big.
And it's only for cows.
And storage containers.
She said, can he be any more murdery?
How was he allowed to do this?
I mean, I guess it wasn't near a school or park,
but just furthers the case for staying out of the damn woods.
He became a real estate agent. Oh, why does that? For some reason, that really bothers me.
Because he's around people all the time, families and houses. And houses.
She was working for him. Oh.
Eventually starting his own company and employing as many as 10 other agents. Do you have to disclose your sex offender status to your employees? If you're the boss, you probably don't, right? I don't know.
So how do you feel about working for... She's like writing a play.
So how do you feel about working for a violent sex offender? Yeah, that's crazy. Yeah.
You should... You can just go on and live your normal life.
I would think that you do have to notify. He just didn't.
I bet he... I bet it was on the record somewhere.
So if you searched sex offenders in your area, he would come up. But I bet he doesn't have to tell them if he's the boss.
Right. Maybe kids...
But then if kids... Like your kid comes to the office...
Fuck, man. I mean, clearly this guy wasn't fucking following the rules to begin with.
And here's the thing.
If you just got a new job, you want to check LinkedIn.
You want to check...
Sex offenders.
The sex offenders registry.
Yeah.
Just do it.
Just do it.
Anyways, on August 31st,
Calla Brown and Charlie Carver, who live right up the street from me, went missing when they answered an ad for Cole to do some work, help cleaning up the property. When they arrived, he pulled a gun and took them hostage.
He immediately shot and killed Charlie and buried him in a shallow grave next to where the shipping container... So she knew.
Yeah, she did. Where Calla was chained up for over two months.
Two days after the couple went missing, Anderson County police started pinging Kala's cell phone, which eventually led police to Kala's property. It took them two weeks to get a search warrant.
They started with flyovers of the property before taking their search to the ground. Police eventually heard Kala pounding on the storage container and they found her unharmed.
Shortly after Kala was rescued, police realized they were dealing with a serial killer. They have since found three other bodies on the property.
He also confessed to a 13-year-old case where four employees at a Spartansburg motorcycle shop were shot in the back in broad daylight with no witnesses. I mean, what in the actual fuck? Google it.
There is a weird... There is weird shit coming out daily on this Dude.
I am a transplant from Chicago and am seen often as the Northern aggressor who won't say hi to anyone. But this further proves your argument of fuck politeness.
Apologize later. I do not need help with my groceries.
I don't want to start small talk over my accent. And thank you, Todd Kolup, for ruining nature.
Thanks for taking the time to read my story. Stay out of the woods.
Stay sexy. Don't get murdered, Stephanie.
What the fuck? That was crazy crazy. I wonder who the other bodies are.
And I want to look up that fucking shooting. I love when like, okay, like the murder I know I'm going to do in Chicago.
Like there's one or two, but these like huge crimes that people don't, like a mass shooting and people are like, how, like the yogurt shop murder. Yeah.
It's like, how the fuck do we still not know who did these? And then just some guy confesses and it's like, okay. Yeah.
We would have never found this person. Yeah.
He has no links, no ties. It's just some random person that's living to escape these evil things they've done.
Totally. And moving away, like moving to South Carolina, moving to the countryside so that...
I mean, at first when this story broke and they were like, we found this kidnapped girl. Then it was like, I was so happy for her.
Her life's going to suck and be awful and hard to get through, but she can get through it. When there's a survivor story, I'm so fucking relieved and happy.
but it's just not it's not
I mean her boyfriend was killed
next to her, you know, probably. And as an intimidation thing for her and Barry, what a fucking.
I mean, who knows? Who knows? No, it's hugely, huge trauma and insane, but she did live. And that's, that's, that is amazing because those are the stories...
I mean, there's four other bodies on his property or three other bodies on his property and four people he killed in a motorcycle shop. She's so lucky.
I know. So lucky to be alive.
God bless her. As Karen would say.
Amen. God bless her.
God bless her. How long...
Should we do one short one more and then have charity corner? Sure. Okay.
All right. This is called my hometown horror.
Hey, I'm new to your podcast. Nice work, by the way.
And I don't know if you're still wanting stories about hometown murders. Oh, we are.
But here's mine if you want it or not. Casey, I want you to be more confident.
Casey, I feel like you feel very vulnerable sending in this murder. Yeah.
And we got you, baby. You don't need to make yourself small.
No. We're here with you.
Celebrate good times. Come on.
Come on. Come on.
So Casey says, back when I was about six or seven, something happened that shook our town to this day. A 17-year-old girl went out for a run on endless country roads in this area.
Dumbass. Never run alone.
Like, how do you not know that? It was the 90s. Well, not surprisingly, she went missing.
Years and years went by. Flash forward to 2010, another jogger finds his trash bag on the side of the road.
For whatever reason, this weirdo decides to look into the bag. Inside we're...
It's like there's all victims. Everyone's a fucking idiot.
Casey hates everybody. She sounds like me.
Inside we're some of the remains of the woman dismembered and shoved into the bag. Upon further investigation, four more bags were found scattered around the country.
County, not country. County, all containing the same woman's pieces.
Fucking hell. It was that girl that had gone missing in the 90s, grown up and fucking dismembered.
Grown up. Wait.
The girl who was a teenager and went missing in the fucking 90s. Oh, this wasn't her teenage body.
This was her grown up. This is what it looks like.
Some fucked up fuck kidnapped that girl, held her for almost 20 years, murdered her. This is a sad ending to your last story.
Then fucking dismembered her and threw her in the side ditch. Yep, that's what happened here.
Nothing had happened before that and nothing has happened since. The fucker was never caught and the poor family never got any answers.
He lives in town, clearly, right? You wouldn't bring her all the way back to town. You look so sad.
Well, I just don't. I mean, I don't have a theory except for it's so dark.
It's just like... So dark.
The 20 years are horrible. But what really screws up my mind is that this rando kept this innocent girl alive somewhere close to this town for almost 20 years.
Horrible. But what really screws up my mind is that this rando kept this innocent girl alive somewhere close to this town for almost 20 years and no one was able to find and save her.
How terrible it must have felt to be her and not be able to get help for that long. Also, how sad for her family to realize that.
No, it's so awful. And then said, also, what possesses someone to hold someone hostage for that long and then all of a sudden kill them? What could have happened to make him snap and murder her after so long?
Okay, I'll stop thinking about it and let you guys mull this over.
Thanks.
Thanks.
Thanks.
Well, I mean, aren't these always the questions that come up that cannot be answered?
It's the reason that everybody's interested in this stuff.
And yeah, I mean, what kind of monster?
What does he look like? Does he look like... Have you seen pictures of Todd Kolup, the other guy? Yeah.
He's really big. Yeah.
Like he's a very, very large man. Yeah.
I just wonder like after 20 years, like don't you get attached to your victim at some point? Not if you're a psychopath or a sociopath. No way.
Which you would have to be
to do that.
They found her
adult body. I was not
expecting that. I thought maybe they would find
her, you know, like she had been kept
somewhere as a dead teen
body.
It's just a new low.
Poor sweet angel.
Poor sweet little... Oh, man.
Well, we went up for a little while and then we just went right back down. What do we expect? I don't know.
Well, I feel just as awful. How about you? Yeah, I feel pretty bad.
Well, at the end of the show now, we're doing one good thing, saying one good thing that happened to us this week. Oh, yeah.
What good thing happened to you this week? Nothing. But I want to say that I Karen, we donated some money as my favorite murder today.
So Brian Safi and Aaron Gibson from the Throwing a Shade podcast started posting on Instagram just screen grabs of the charities
they were just donating to.
And it was just like,
just do this.
Just do it.
Like they kept posting places
that they were donating to.
And I was like,
all right, you know what?
I feel like shit.
I'm going to try that.
So I did a couple
and I did one as my favorite murder
to the National Coalition
Against Domestic Violence.
Great.
So we did that. That's one good thing.
That's perfect. Right? That Against Domestic Violence.
Great. So we did that.
That's one good thing.
That's perfect.
Right?
That's a great thing.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Money counts.
Spend your money wisely.
Yeah.
And if you don't have money to give, just give blood or become a doned marrow transplant.
I'm on the doned marrow transplant.
Are you a doned marrow?
I'm a doner.
What did I say? Wow. I didn't even.
Are you a bone marrow? I'm a donor. What did I say?
Wow.
I didn't even catch that.
Don't marrow?
Shit, man.
And can I point out I've been drinking water this whole time?
Yeah, it's so cold.
I mean, I'm shit-faced, but I just haven't been drinking.
But you're just drinking water.
Bone marrow transplant donor list and blood. Try to give money money you're just like give every possible thing give it all away you know what it is just try to do things for other people that's actually it really is something that makes people feel better is when you make human connection and you help out be a helper it's also something that I to say, I'm not that good at because I'm always like time and pain or my comfort or whatever.
I feel like that's something I would like to do better at, which is like, that's the whole idea of volunteering is sacrifice and you're supposed to be kind of giving of yourself. It's supposed to be time off of your couch where you're not comfortable.
That's the whole idea. You guys go do something good for someone and it'll make you feel better about how fucked up everything is.
Right? Is that how it happens? Right. Let us know if it works.
Hey, Elvis, come in here. Thanks for listening you guys we hope uh we hope you know we have hope uh stay sexy and don't get murdered elvis do you want a cookie come on man oh man oh mimi you want a cookie mimi no mom mimi wanna be my friend? Elvis, cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie I mean Elvis, you want a cookie? you want a cookie? you want a cookie? take.
Well, now you're going to have to wait for a cookie.
Yeah.
Cookie.
Cookie.
He's like, yeah.
All right.
Bye.
Bye.
Okay, we're back.
So, Karen, any updates?
The update is just that the story was still unfolding when I was talking about it in this 2016 episode. 400 episodes later, I do the deep dive, which is the super bike murders case in episode 458.
It's called The Demands Are Incredible, that episode. And you get the entirety of the story, which is actually kind of cool.
The story had just broken of finding Kayla Brown on his property, and then this is basically like, now here's everything they know.
Yeah, that was wow including a cold case yeah totally that was a great story and you did a great job in that one thank you that is episode 458 so i mean abject failure is a pretty great name for this episode so perfect but a couple other options in case, because we always need options. Like you said, you called it Greetings Corner, meeting people at the acupuncturist or Madewell or whatever.
Yeah. And then we could also call it Bloated as a Balloon about sugar-free gummy bears, those dreaded things.
Forever. I mean, that should be the title just because that was the episode.
Bloated as a balloon. It was a diarrhea episode.
There's also justinattimberlake.com, which was your joke about it's a famous person's email that is so funny. Oh my gosh.
And also, what about the lesson of we've been through this before people stick together and keep their heads on straight. Like people are coming out and showing up and rising up and it's really amazing to see.
So all is not lost. Yep.
Love it. Thanks for listening and we will talk at you soon.
Stay sexy. And don't get murdered.
Goodbye. Elvis, do you want a cookie? Bruce Russell.
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