MFM Minisode 422

Speaker 1 This is exactly right.

Speaker 1 This podcast is sponsored by PayPal. Okay, let's talk holiday shopping.
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NMLS 910457. Goodbye.
Goodbye. No one brings out your inner monster like a bad neighbor.

Speaker 1 Claire Danes and Matthew Reese find that out for themselves in The Beast in Me, a new eight-episode drama from the team that brought you homeland. Danes plays Aggie Wiggs, a grieving writer.

Speaker 1 Reese plays Niall Jarvis, her new neighbor and possible murderer. But who's the monster and who's the bad neighbor? That's another story.

Speaker 1 It's a game of cat and mouse that sets them on a collision course with fatal consequences. The Beast and Me, now playing only on Netflix.
You will not want to miss this. Goodbye.
Goodbye.

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Goodbye.

Speaker 1 Hello

Speaker 1 and welcome to my favorite murder. The mini sod.
That's right. Yes.

Speaker 1 Do you want to go for it? Oh, wait. It's me? It's me.
It's you? Let me go. Watch this.
The subject line of this email is lies from my mom hometown request.

Speaker 1 Helly, my ladies. H-E-L-L-Y.
Helly, my ladies. Okay.
Intentional? Perhaps. I love the request about lies you found out that your parents had told to keep you from getting into trouble.

Speaker 1 And this lie was discovered because of MFM.

Speaker 1 I am an almost Christmas baby, born on the 22nd. And anytime there was an option for a birthday party when I was small, I always wanted to go to Show Biz Pizza.
Yeah. And it says, this was Chuck E.

Speaker 1 Cheese before it was Chuck E. Cheese.
And side note, do yourself a favor and watch the documentary about the Rockefeller explosion. Do you know this? No.

Speaker 1 The band? Yeah, the animatronic band that played in the restaurants. It's worth your time.
I've seen that a million years ago, but yes, it's totally worth your time. The documentary? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Anywho, because of having to compete with Jesus for attention around that time of year, I was typically granted my request to have a party there.

Speaker 1 I was also the first to shove any other birthday party invite into my mom's face when it was going to be held at Showbiz.

Speaker 1 One day, my mom told this story about how they were investigating Showbiz because a little girl was kidnapped there, and the kidnappers took her to the bathroom, chopped off her hair and put boy clothes on her and they still hadn't found her.

Speaker 1 Gasp. Of course, this scared me to death and I loved my long hair and I didn't want to be kidnapped.
The horror. So we never went back again.
Oh my God. Fast forward, I am a day one MFM listener.

Speaker 1 And then it's parentheses, it says, love you guys, seriously. And one day, this story creeps back into my brain.

Speaker 1 I start internet sleuthing about my hometown, time of year, show biz, did they find her? The list goes on, nothing. I'm thinking that it was just solved quickly or something.

Speaker 1 And given the early 90s and lack of online inquiries, it wasn't a big deal. Come to find out,

Speaker 1 my mother, sweet Cynthia, made the entire story up so we wouldn't ever have to go back to showbiz.

Speaker 1 Cynthia,

Speaker 1 are you fucking kidding? You induced childhood trauma. Are you kidding me? Oh, are you kidding me? Oh, because we're all, we all can't.
we're all.

Speaker 1 Yes. What the fuck? Well, it's, you know what I mean? I think Cynthia was like, we need to slice this clean off.
I cannot go and listen to that animatronic band play one more time.

Speaker 1 Totally, like, feel for the mom. I get it.
But there's like. It's pretty extreme.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 I casually asked her one day about the details and she said, oh, yeah, that wasn't true. I just hated going to that loud germ-infested pit, Cynthia.

Speaker 1 Thank you, mom. Thank you.
Not only for the mental scarring of having my hair chopped off, but of also robbing me of shitty pizza and child casino games for penny prizes.

Speaker 1 SSDGM and always question your mother, Taryn, Louisville, Kentucky. It's just so extreme.
Yeah, it is. Because I remember that was like urban legend.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 But it was one where I'm sure it was based in some distant thing. But I remember my aunt Joe telling me that, where it's like, they were in Kmart and she wasn't.
It was always a friend. Right.
Right.

Speaker 1 And then like they had to, all of a sudden, they were locking the doors and everyone had to stay there. And then there was a missing child.

Speaker 1 And when they found the child, they were, it was in a stranger's arms, cut, chopped off, dyed hair. To like look, yeah, to sneak out.
Like the boy. Wow.
So that must have been like an 80s, 90s. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Oh, that's just

Speaker 1 killing. So scary.
Okay, here's another scary one. Classic hometown.

Speaker 1 hitchhiking murders plus some coincidences. Hello, love you guys.
I'm a doctor who did my residency training during the pandemic. And all I can say is please get your vaccines.

Speaker 1 While I was in training, I told my team the story, and the room got very quiet and awkward, and I realized there was no murderino to be found.

Speaker 1 But I thought you guys might appreciate it. That's such a sad feeling.
And you're just like, oh, wait, nobody? Okay. I'll take this somewhere else.
Like, no one knows how to respond to this.

Speaker 1 I just made it awkward. Yeah.
So my mom's brother was a very popular, all-around good guy who spent his summer in Europe in the 70s where hitchhiking was totally normal.

Speaker 1 When he got back to the States, he kept hitchhiking.

Speaker 1 Him and a friend, we'll call them Joe and Jim, were hitchhiking back to their car after an Oakland A's game when the people in the car, who were very high on drugs, stabbed both of them multiple times and left them for dead.

Speaker 1 My uncle Joe didn't make it, but his friend did survive. Oh my God.
Fucking crazy. The killers were caught days later when they were bragging about the murders at a party.

Speaker 1 My mom went to their court things and they went to prison for a very long time. Cut to a couple years ago, my mom was at church and she sees all cap, her brother's killer, signing books at a table.

Speaker 1 He had gotten out of prison, written a book on recidivism, and was signing it at my mom's church.

Speaker 1 Ultimately, my mom wrote to him to say she forgives him and if he ever wants to chat, she's open to it, but he never responded. This murder really took a toll on my family.

Speaker 1 Even though it happened before I was born, it gives me some insight into generational trauma and why my mom is generally pretty anxious, but also a badass bitch.

Speaker 1 Thank you for all you do to promote mental and physical health. Love you guys.
XOXO, Naomi. Just so like unexpected, kind of out of

Speaker 1 to be in church, first of all,

Speaker 1 and then see that person that you think is just like. The grace it took to not just fucking start screaming and hitting that person.
Right. Well, and then to.

Speaker 1 Write a letter and say, like, I forgive you is a huge deal. And then to have that just kind of ignored.
Yeah. Yeah.
Wow. Yeah.

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Speaker 1 Terms and conditions apply. Goodbye.
This podcast is sponsored by PayPal. Okay, let's talk holiday shopping.
From now through December 8th, you can get 20% cash back when you pay in four with PayPal.

Speaker 1 No fees, no interest. This limited time offer is perfect for the Black Friday and Cyber Monday deals you've been eyeing.
Save the offer in the app now.

Speaker 1 So, whether you're buying tickets to an improv show or a whodunit board game, PayPal helps you make the most of your money this holiday. Expires December 8th.

Speaker 1 See paypal.com/slash promo terms subject to approval. Learn more at paypal.com/slash payin4, PayPal Inc., NMLS 910-457.
Goodbye. Goodbye.

Speaker 1 We're gonna take a little left turn, please.

Speaker 1 I'm not gonna read you the subject line. It says, Hey, howdy, hey.
My first year out of college, I was waiting tables because what better way to put that $250,000 degree to good use?

Speaker 1 Needless to say, all my income was in cold, hard cash, and in order to prevent myself from spending, and I was too lazy to take it to the bank every few days, I would hide the money all over the place.

Speaker 1 But I needed one concise place to keep my rent money since I needed to be sure how much I had. And if I needed to wear my rent money shorts to my next shift.

Speaker 1 Whoa,

Speaker 1 so she'd like put it in a pair of shorts, like, don't forget to take the rent money out of those shorts before you wear them. No, no, no.
No, she had to put it in a place that was like safe.

Speaker 1 So it's like you're hiding money everywhere. You'll never spend this money because that's the rent money.
Like, never tap into that. Okay.

Speaker 1 And then if that's too low, she puts on her short shorts and goes to work and gets better tips.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Now I get it. Rent money shorts.
Now I get it. I mean, that's how I'm interpreting it.
Obviously, I couldn't hide it in the sock drawer or envelopes in my desk, so where to put it?

Speaker 1 Enter the tissue box.

Speaker 1 I got one of my square tissue boxes, carefully took out all the tissues out in their perfectly folded stack, and placed my rubber banded stash at the bottom, replaced all the tissues, gave it a little fluff, and no one would know the wiser.

Speaker 1 Oh, no. Fast forward a few months, and my apartment was broken into.

Speaker 1 My bedroom was completely ransacked, dresser drawers tossed on the floor, everything in my closet pulled off the racks, my mattresses pushed off the frame, I broke into a a cold sweat.

Speaker 1 But there on my nightstand, not even moved in the slightest, was my tissue box. And in the bottom, every dollar of my rent.

Speaker 1 The only thing missing was a jar I kept all my coins in, maybe $20 worth. Wow.
Stay sexy and don't touch my tissues, Jess.

Speaker 1 I thought she was going to say someone threw the box away at the end of it. Like me and my dad with his butter box.

Speaker 1 Still so mad about that. Wow.
That's

Speaker 1 smart. Smart and lucky.
Yes. The problem is I was doing, I started hiding cash during quarantine because it was that thing of like, what if,

Speaker 1 whatever. There was all those weird kind of like, the world is going to change overnight.
We're going to run out and we're going to need, yeah, I remember that.

Speaker 1 But of course, I didn't like write down where, like, I was like, here's a really vague manila envelope. I'll put it in here.
You have no idea. No idea.

Speaker 1 But I'll find it one day when I like clean that drawer out. But totally.
It's still there. It's just.
Or like, did I spend it in it? Like a weird,

Speaker 1 I'm not sure. But then it's like, and then I put it other other places where I'm just like, is it over here? Like the worst person to be doing that trick.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I'd lose it.

Speaker 1 Oh, well. Hey, here's a coincidence.
This one's called The World is My Money Boost.

Speaker 1 It just starts, not a murder and not a sinkhole, but a glitch in the matrix that I've been benefiting from. And I want to brag about it in your voices.

Speaker 1 I live in Chicago and I find money on the ground all the time. Yes.
Not just quarters or useless pennies, but 20s, 10s, and even a $50 bill.

Speaker 1 I'll be out walking, on a run, or commuting via my bike, and I'll find money. Here's a list of fines in the past year.
Yes, yes, yes. Sorry for this email.
Yes.

Speaker 1 A crisp $5 bill at the busy six-corner intersection in the Wicker Park neighborhood as I was rushing to cycle to my physical therapy appointment.

Speaker 1 I was five minutes late, but my therapist just laughed when I told her why.

Speaker 1 On a run some beautiful Saturday morning, and I spotted a $20 bill that was missing a large piece after having gone through a lawnmower.

Speaker 1 I paused on my run to take it to the bank to see if I could exchange it. Despite missing most of the middle top half, it still had a serial number, and I was able to leave the bank with a fresh one.

Speaker 1 Amazing. I think it's like if it's more than one corner that's missing or something like that.
That's what I heard, but that could be wrong. I'd love to get a graph about exactly how much you need.

Speaker 1 How fucked up does your bill have to be? What if it's you walk in with the serial number? Yeah. Just a little circle of paper.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Literally four days before the damaged 20, I found a different $20 bill in the middle of an intersection as I was biking home.

Speaker 1 I had worried my new sunglasses tint would obscure my talent, but they didn't. I think it might be Chicago.
People just fucking losing money. Drunk? Is it like, do you find this on Sundays or Mondays?

Speaker 1 Right? Yeah. Last winter, while walking into the entrance of zoo lights with my husband and stepson, there was a gust of wind and a pile of leaves went by.
I shouted, there's money.

Speaker 1 I snatched up a $50 bill. We had a fun night from that.
It paid for our admission. We rode the Ferris wheel and my stepson got a toy.
Hell yes.

Speaker 1 At this point, it's been happening to me for about 15 years. It either irritates my family and friends or they just shake their heads at me.

Speaker 1 So last year I decided to pay it forward and I ran the Chicago Marathon on a charity team. From my skill set, I raised $47 from ground scores alone.
Ground scores? I don't know what that means.

Speaker 1 Scoring money on the ground. That's amazing.

Speaker 1 It's not my money, and I figured it should go to a no-kill animal shelter instead. Nice.
That's amazing. We all have our superpowers, and mine is finding money or useful things.

Speaker 1 I found a North Face Fleece, a Bluetooth speaker as well.

Speaker 1 So take that mental health walk, put your phones on, do not disturb, look around, and you never know what treasures might be waiting for you. My hopeful next find is a kitten.
Oh. Aaliyah.

Speaker 1 Oh, Aaliyah, you're lucky, lucky person.

Speaker 1 Wishing you the cat distribution system works in your favor. I mean,

Speaker 1 it got to. Yeah, Chicago littered with kittens.
I'm just trying to think of like that.

Speaker 1 I feel like I have been a lucky person, not in the times of like, I've never like won contests or anything like that. But I do feel like I've, it's the thing.
I think we've talked about it.

Speaker 1 I used to go when I was really broke, I would just get up and go through my coat pockets and my, all the pockets of my clothes in my closet. And I would always end up finding 25

Speaker 1 20 10 yeah so i i wonder if there is a something about the looking yeah brings it to me just like yeah manifesting it makes you notice it it's still going to be there for anyone but you're the one who'd been thinking about it unless we live in the matrix and they're like sure you can have ten dollars if you tap in fucking do it come on then

Speaker 1 This podcast is sponsored by PayPal. Okay, let's talk holiday shopping.
From now through December 8th, you can get 20% cash back when you pay in four with PayPal. No fees, no interest.

Speaker 1 This limited time offer is perfect for the Black Friday and Cyber Monday deals you've been eyeing. Save the offer in the app now.

Speaker 1 So, whether you're buying tickets to an improv show or a whodunit board game, PayPal helps you make the most of your money this holiday. Expires December 8th.

Speaker 1 See paypal.com/slash promo terms subject to approval. Learn more at paypal.com/slash payin4, PayPal Inc., NMLS 910-457.
Goodbye. Goodbye.

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Goodbye.

Speaker 1 Okay, lastie for me. Okay.

Speaker 1 The subject line of this email is, Aretha Franklin elbowed me at the buffet line.

Speaker 1 Hello, Karen Georgia, and everyone at Exactly Right. I just listened to episode 460 about Mary Jones, and it brought me so much joy.
That was the, Mary Jones was the Aretha Franklin personation.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. So good.

Speaker 1 And it brought me so much joy because it reminded me of the time Aretha Franklin elbowed me at a buffet line. It sounds like someone explaining their dream.
Yes.

Speaker 1 Completely. Yes.

Speaker 1 It is a dream. It was 2010, and I was living in New York City, having recently earned my master's in publishing from Columbia.

Speaker 1 Well, well, well, well, well. We got smarty pants listening.
Well, well, well.

Speaker 1 Okay. The publishing world was collapsing.
Magazines were folding. Suddenly, no one was hiring.

Speaker 1 And I was scraping by with any job I could get, living on food stamps and feeling increasingly panicked that I'd have to abandon my dreams, go back to my hometown of Albuquerque, and probably switch careers.

Speaker 1 Okay, sorry, we said, well, well, well, it's you. Never mind.

Speaker 1 I'm saying we, but it was me. In the midst of all the turmoil, I managed to land a gig as a freelance red carpet reporter.

Speaker 1 Wow.

Speaker 1 And because I got paid per quote, you'd better believe I shoved my way past every camera person and had no time for feeling starstruck because every celebrity I talked to meant I could survive in the city a little longer.

Speaker 1 Wow, what a hustle. Yeah, badass.
It was a crazy job and I constantly got hit in the head by camera equipment, but it was amazing because

Speaker 1 you don't think about that

Speaker 1 danger on the red carpet. But it was amazing because I met so many incredible people and had access to some seriously exclusive events.

Speaker 1 The most memorable experience had to be when I was tasked with covering the Spring Benefit Concert and Awards Ceremony at the Apollo Theater on June 14th, 2010, honoring none other than the Queen of Soul herself, who performed that night and was inducted into the Apollo Legends Hall of Fame.

Speaker 1 I mean, God,

Speaker 1 what? Yeah, just the

Speaker 1 the electricity of being at a place like that. Historic times.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 I grew up listening to her music, and I was beyond excited to go, which every, I'm sure, person in that building was like going insane.

Speaker 1 After a star-studded red carpet where I got enough quotes to tie me over for another month, I love that. I know.
It's very satisfying.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it just sounds, it sounds like a book, like a novel, a character would have. I was allowed to go inside the theater and watch the show for free as a member of the press.

Speaker 1 That alone would have made all my struggles in New York worth it, but then I was invited to a private catered party right there at the theater with a glorious buffet.

Speaker 1 I was standing in line, oggling food I could never have afforded when someone elbowed me in my right side.

Speaker 1 Aretha Franklin Live and in the Flesh stood next to me, grinned, and said, looks pretty good, doesn't it?

Speaker 1 Before I had a chance to do or say anything, she walked ahead, nudging and hugging people here and there, stopping to make brief conversation. Oh,

Speaker 1 she disappeared after that, but I know it happened for sure because the people in front of me turned around and we all squealed in pure joy. Oh my God.

Speaker 1 I loaded my plate, went back for seconds, and at some point floated back to my tiny apartment to send in my work, feeling more love toward New York than ever.

Speaker 1 I ended up getting a job at Instyle soon after that. And though I'm back in Albuquerque these days, I'm here willingly and happily and still work in publishing.

Speaker 1 I'd like to think that on that day, a little bit of Aretha's magic rubbed off on me, giving me a very needed boost to keep going.

Speaker 1 I listened to you since the early days, and my sister and nieces and I love you. Thank you so much for all you do, and please stay safe during those crazy fires in LA, SSDGM, and R-E-S-P-E-C-T.

Speaker 1 Monica. That's good.
Monica. Wow.

Speaker 1 Oh, what a moment. What a moment in life.
Yeah, just like, just hustling. You got yourself there.

Speaker 1 You did, you're asking good enough questions that you keep getting rehired Yeah, and it's like a month-to-month thing like you don't know what the fuck's gonna happen next month Anything can happen just got to keep on trying and then suddenly I honestly thought it was gonna be like I just figured because you know you I've seen a lot of clips of Aretha Franklin where she's kind of like she's very like blase blase and like it has to go out on the step and repeat to take pictures and throws her purse and her fur down in a corner.

Speaker 1 Like she's just so like eye roll. Yeah.
So I could totally see it be just like out of my way. This is my show.
Right.

Speaker 1 But instead she's like, let me give this chick a moment that she's going to remember. She knows.
She knows. She knows.
She knows. That's true.
So classic. True queen behavior.

Speaker 1 She's like, aren't we all having fun with my

Speaker 1 party? Here's something to tell people when you get home tonight. Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 So jealous. I want to end on that one.
It was so good, but I have a quick, my quick last one. Yeah.
Okay. They're all good.
It's sweet. You're like it.
Yeah. Okay.

Speaker 1 It's called You're in Our Love Story. Oh.
Hi, Karen in Georgia. What am I even doing right now? Feeding my baby while listening to my favorite podcast.

Speaker 1 And then it says, wouldn't it be funny if I said it wasn't yours? Yes, it would be. It's called Smartless.

Speaker 1 I thought I might share why you're partially to thank for my daughter being here at all. I met my partner while working in the same building and we bonded over many things, including being murderinos.

Speaker 1 On our first date, I opened the door and instead of flowers, he was holding your book. He remembered I had wanted to read it and I was immediately smitten.

Speaker 1 After falling in love, buying a home, blending our family, and being told I couldn't have more kids, here I sit feeding our nine-month-old baby Cheerios while we listen to Rewind episodes.

Speaker 1 If you read that right, it looks like the baby's name is Cheerios, which I think is fucking

Speaker 1 hilarious. Feeding our nine-month-old baby Cheerios,

Speaker 1 but it's feeding our nine-month-old baby Cheerios.

Speaker 1 Oh, this is new to Rewind episodes. Thank you for forever being a part of our love story and giving my guy the little boost of confidence it took to land a hottie like me.
Yes, girl.

Speaker 1 Stay sexy and hope that babies can understand what you're listening to. Love Alyssa.
Oh, Alyssa. That was the perfect last email.
I know. And doesn't this come out around Valentine's Day? Sweet.

Speaker 1 Perfect runner-up for Valentine's Day.

Speaker 1 Hey, send us your love stories, whatever they may be. That's so sweet.
I know. That's so weird.
Shout out to Alyssa's husband. Yeah, good job, dude.
Yeah. Hey, thanks for listening.

Speaker 1 Alyssa's husband. Alyssa's husband, especially.

Speaker 1 And Cheerio, especially. Oh, my God.
Cheerio. We're so proud of you, Cheerio.

Speaker 1 Send us your emails at myfavorate murder at gmail. Thanks for all your stories.
We appreciate you. Stay sexy.
And don't get murdered.

Speaker 1 Goodbye. Elvis, do you want a cookie?

Speaker 1 This has been an exactly right production. Our senior producer is Alejandra Keck.
Our editor is Aristotle Acevedo. This episode was mixed by Liana Squalachi.

Speaker 1 Email your hometowns to myfavorite murder at gmail.com and follow the show on Instagram and Facebook at myfavorite murder. Goodbye.

Speaker 1 Your pet is your best friend, your therapist, and your unpaid intern. So don't just feed them, fuel them with Hill's Pet Nutrition.

Speaker 1 Hills is backed by science to support whole body health in dogs and cats.

Speaker 1 As a leader in science-led nutrition, Hills supports lean muscles, which are essential for everything your pet does, whether whether that's the zoomies, squirrel patrol, or occasionally knocking something over.

Speaker 1 Hills science-led nutrition helps you give more love than humanly possible. Because you're only human, there's Hills.
Science does more. Find the right food at hillspet.com slash iHeart.
Goodbye.

Speaker 1 This week on Dear Chelsea with me, Chelsea Handler, Nicholas Sparks is here.

Speaker 2 I would imagine that you've gotten a lot of feedback about setting a standard of romance that a lot of men can't measure up to.

Speaker 1 I have heard stories. At the same time, I've had seven marriage proposals in lines to sign my book.
Really? Get up to the table. Doodle drop to his knees.

Speaker 1 I'm like, dude, you're in a Walmart in Birmingham, Alabama, you know.

Speaker 1 Listen to Dear Chelsea on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Speaker 1 I'm Bridget Armstrong, host of the new podcast, The Curse of America's Next Top Model. I've been investigating the real story behind that iconic show.

Speaker 1 I ended up having anorexia issues, bulimia issues, by talking to the models, the producers, and the people who profited from it all. We basically sold our souls and they got rich.

Speaker 1 If you were so rooting for her and saw her drowning, why don't you help her? Listen to the curse of America's Next Top Model on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts.