Ep 144: Josh Thomas

James, huge news from the world of off-menu and indeed the world of the world.

Yes.

Ever heard of the Royal Albert Hall?

I have.

We've done live shows there.

And guess what?

We're doing more live shows there next year.

Sure, a lot of them are sold out already.

But we thought, hey, throw these guys a bone.

Let's put on one final Royal Albert Hall show in that run.

The show will be on Monday, the 16th of March.

It's going to be a tasting menu, a returning guest coming back, receiving the menu of another previous guest.

Those shows have been a lot of fun.

We cannot wait to do them live.

Who will we pull out of our little magic bag?

You'll have to come along on the 16th of March to find out.

If I'm correct in thinking, presale tickets go on pre-sale on the 10th of September.

Pre-sale tickets are 10th of September at 10 a.m.

And then the general sale is 12th of September at 10 a.m.

So if you miss out on the pre-sale, don't forget general sale is only two days later.

The day in between is for reflecting.

Get your tickets from royalalberthall.com Hall.com or offmenupodcast.co.uk.

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Careful when you open up this episode.

I've shaken it a lot and it's gonna spray in your face, James.

Wow, was that someone opening a fizzed up bottle or was that the genie coming out but he's all wet?

I was coming out of the lab and as I was coming out someone shook up a bottle and opened it in my face.

Oh man, what a sound effect.

Who knew?

You're like Bobcat Goldthwaite.

Yeah, it really, it really surprised me.

I caught myself off guard when I did that, Eduard.

Yeah, pretty cool.

I don't know if Bobcat Goldthwaite can do sound effects, actually.

He does like silly noises.

It's more the other guy in Police Academy.

Yeah, we don't want Bobcat coming after us.

But yeah, that other guy who was once at Edinburgh Festival.

Do you remember that?

Yeah, I remember he was at the Chautle Awards once.

I was quite starstruck.

Yeah, it's great.

We were all excited that the man who does the sound effects in Police Academy was suddenly at Edinburgh and everywhere.

And we all got to see him at least once.

Forgotten his name?

No.

There were people absolutely screaming his name at the top of their voices.

Michael.

Fair enough.

Michael.

Winslow.

Winslow.

Michael Winslow.

Thank you the great Penito.

Anyway, welcome to the Off-Menu podcast, where, as well as just trying to remember the names of people, we also ask a special guest, their favourite starter main course dessert, side dish, and drink.

And this week's guest is Michael.

Josh Thomas.

Josh Thomas is Josh Thomas, a brilliant Australian comedian and writer and actor.

He is in a show in Australia called Please Like Me.

That's his show.

And his show in the States is called Everything is Gonna Be Okay.

That's what it's called.

called.

Everything is gonna be okay, Josh.

So go and check that out.

Track that down if you can.

Here's brilliant.

This is an episode that we recorded when we were in LA, James, in our LA trip.

But we're recording the intro much later because it was our last day in LA.

I think we recorded three or four episodes on the bounce.

And after that, we didn't want to record the intros and outros.

We wanted to go out and we wanted to a traditional final evening in LA of drinking slightly too much, eating a lot of food, and then going to see a sting musical about the Newcastle docks.

It was one of the best days of my life.

And looking back at it now, that we're currently recording this intro during quarantine, we're locked down, and I would give anything to be going to see that Sting musical again.

Yeah, oh man.

And the amount of Americans we told what we were doing that night, I've never been looked at like an alien so much.

Yep.

It's our last night in LA.

We're going to see the Sting musical.

That Sting musical.

There's a Sting musical.

Don't you know what's going on in your own town?

yeah

well evidently not a lot of people did because the tickets were freely available until very available we thought it was going to be sold out we were like oh i can't believe all the tickets to was it the last ship is that what it was called the last ship the last ship are going to be sold out

we thought they're all going to be sold out there's no way and bedito was like oh no We can sit anywhere.

Sit anywhere we like.

We can sit on the ship if we want.

We turned up like the worst audience members at our own gig because we just turned up drunk and sat there laughing our heads off for the whole time.

James leaning over to people we didn't know and going, why have you come here?

We're here as a joke.

Yep, chatting to people.

They liked chatting to me, I think.

Yeah, they love to chat.

And then Ed bought the soundtrack at the end of the night and was listening to it in his room when he was packing up the next morning.

Happier times.

James had a whiskey in a little plastic cup.

I did.

I went to get some more whiskey during the show and there was a lad who worked there sitting outside and I said, have you seen this show?

And he went, not yet.

And I went, it's shit.

But I looked so happy.

I looked delighted.

And he was like, cool.

Well, I will tell you who is not shit and is absolutely worth a ticket price is the wonderful Josh Thomas.

So we're going to speak to Josh Thomas now, but we will kick Josh Thomas out if he says a secret ingredient, which we have decided now.

And that secret ingredient is beansprouts.

Bean sprouts.

They are never welcome, I find.

You told me, Ed, that they cause food poisoning sometimes.

I believe they can.

I believe that's often the culprit in a Chinese takeaway because they get left

stored in water, I think, and they can go a bit stagnant.

And I don't like them.

I don't like them.

Get rid of them.

I don't like them anyway.

So, if Josh Thomas has bean sprouts, he's out on his ear.

Sorry, Josh.

We're going to kick him sprout the restaurant.

But hopefully, he won't say that.

Well, here is the off-menu menu of Josh Thomas.

Welcome, Josh, to the Dream Restaurant.

Hello, how are you doing?

Very well, sir.

Oh, here he is.

Welcome, Josh Thomas, to the dream restaurant.

I've spat all over myself.

The genie's dreaming.

I've never been able to figure out, because when I listen to this, I can't tell your voice is apart to me.

You just sound like one person.

Yes, yes.

So I never knew you were the genie.

Oh, really?

Yeah, it was me.

You're the one who's a genie.

Huge reveal.

Yeah, yeah.

Were you surprised when you showed up and there were two hosts?

No, I knew there were two of you, but I didn't know who you were.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, I know one of you is diabetic, but I don't know which one.

I'm diabetic.

He's a genie.

Okay.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Very similar.

Both afflictions, in a way.

Yeah, yeah.

In a way.

I have to inject before I eat.

He lives in a lamp.

Yeah.

Yeah, we're both waiting to be freed.

Me from a lamp, you from

diabetes.

Diabetes, yeah.

Diabetes.

Life of a chronic condition.

Yeah, yeah.

We haven't talked about it.

That's not come up on an episode for a while, actually.

Diabetes?

Yeah, I miss it.

Do you miss it?

I like like it when it comes up, yeah.

Yeah, well, you like telling people that I fell in the Thames.

Yeah, raising awareness.

And that's how I got it.

That's what's important, isn't it?

That's what I felt about.

Wait, is that true?

No, it's not.

A lot of illnesses is important to you.

Raise awareness.

You've got diabetes probably from what?

Fell in the Thames.

It's well, it's, you know, it's.

What did you do to get your disease?

It must have been in a previous life.

Yeah, okay.

And I couldn't tell you what it was, but it was bad.

It was very naughty.

It was very naughty, whatever it was.

Very naughty.

Have you done naughty things that you deserve diseases for?

Yeah, Yeah, man.

I've been under some mischief.

Don't worry about that.

But I don't have any diseases.

I have no diabetes.

I'm not a genie.

No.

Just a guy.

Oh, just all your life.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Oh, congrats, man.

That's really cool.

How are you finding the food in Los Angeles?

Yeah, we're having a good time of it.

Yeah.

So we were in New York for a week, and then we're here for a week.

And I'll be honest, I think I've burnt myself out on food now.

Really?

I think I should.

What are you eating in LA?

LA doesn't have interesting food, which I don't want to say too much because they don't think, they don't agree with me and they get really hurt feelings.

Because how long have you been here for now?

Two years.

Two years.

Yeah, before that, you lived in Australia.

In Melbourne.

Melbourne, which is

a very good food place.

Yeah.

I've never been there.

You looked at me looking for some sort of that I should say.

I was just trying to involve you.

I was losing my eye contacts.

You're good at that so far?

So well, yeah.

I think James is still trying to displace the fact that when he did the genie sound effect, he spat all over himself.

And I do just want to go back to that.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I'll happily talk about it

I always do the GD sound effect and this time I just went really big on the sound effect I was really I was so while I was doing the sound effect I thought to myself in my head oh this really sounds legit this week

I wasn't really focusing on anything else and then I spat down my chin a sheet of spit and I was like ah that's that's uh that's happened I didn't know that wasn't just how it went yeah I mean I just thought that's how it went yeah yeah you think so I just put a lot more effort for your episode than I have for any other one Yeah, you like that big.

Yeah, but hopefully I can sustain that energy for the whole.

I think you will.

I'm worried now.

I think you're doing well.

You spat all your energy out.

Yeah.

It'll spit all my energy all over myself immediately.

So.

So LA's not a good food town, you think?

Well, it's not, it's fine.

Yeah.

But it's not like as a tourist, I don't know, like, when it maybe are like, what should I eat?

I'm like, I don't know what to tell you.

Right, okay.

Like, I mean, there's like mozzarella soup, but if you've just been in New York, you've probably had better Jewish deli than here.

Sure.

There's like Mexican food.

But then like, I mean, it's not as good as Mexico, and that's right there.

Yeah.

It is right.

Just to let you know,

we're recording at the border.

Yeah, we're just on the border.

So I got no recommendations.

I was just wondering if you did.

We had a fantastic best at Bestia the other night.

Which is an Italian restaurant.

Yeah.

It felt like a thing.

Every dish there was fantastic.

Yeah.

So yeah, that

great

steak, great fish.

There's tacos.

Guisados last night.

Yes, that's the best tacos.

That's really good.

Yeah.

Did you get the sample paint?

Seven different tiny little tacos.

That's a nice way to live, isn't it?

Yeah, yeah.

Popping them all in.

I I could do each one in one bite.

I had to like have a technique where I kind of like put it in and then like post the rest of it in with my thumb.

But I was still able to do it and get it all in in in one go.

Because you want it all in one bite?

Yeah, I I don't like biting a taco, especially when it's like more kind of stewed meats in the middle and then having it like drip onto your hand and and having a palm full of meat juice.

That's interesting because to me, you're the drip boy that likes to drip.

You're the dripper.

Yeah, yeah,

yeah.

I've made up for it later on in life.

People are full of contradiction.

Yeah, yeah.

I am pretty drippy, so yeah.

Yeah, it makes sense.

The lady refused to serve me the spicy one.

The really spicy one.

I said, can I have that one?

She went, no.

Oh, but it's more of a.

She said it's more of a challenge taco.

I was like, I'm not up for a challenge.

I sort of just want dinner.

I often find find Americans telling me that something's spicy.

They're like, oh, you know, you can't have this.

It's spicy.

And I'm like, oh, honey.

I can eat it.

If you've got it on your menu in this country, I can eat it.

Like, give it to me.

It's fine.

Yeah, that's fair enough.

Are you a bit of a foodie?

Yeah, I'm very food-focused.

Right.

So all I did in my 20s really was like travel and eat usually quite expensive food.

That's what I spent all my money on.

Yeah.

So I've been very stressed about this podcast.

Yes, which I like.

When I listen to the podcast and somebody's not really into food, I move on.

So, Rose McGowan, she was like, you know,

if I had to have a pill, if I couldn't eat food, I was like, fuck off, Rose McAllen.

We've got nothing for me today.

So, I've been very serious about it.

That's good.

That's good.

That's what we like to hear.

Do you name like every episode of your sitcom after food?

Food, yeah, there's a lot of food.

Yeah, but I don't really like, I kind of burnt myself out on it at like 29.

So, I haven't really the last few years now.

I just eat.

Mostly, I'm in LA.

So, the truth is, if I was gonna have my dream meal it would be things I haven't eaten right because I like to try new things that's like how I feel but then I don't know that's not like um it's not a good podcast it's difficult to discuss things if you've never had them yeah it's just I'd like to try this yeah and also they're also things that I don't know that I want yet yeah

do you know what I mean what I would want is for somebody to be like well this is like a cake from like Egypt that's like really good and this is the best version of it and you've never heard of it and here it is and you get to eat it now yeah so the podcast is gonna be us saying, What do you want for your stars?

And you're going, Well, I don't know yet.

What would the chef recommend?

That's what I would want, right?

And, um, but there's two things that in the dream podcast I would eat that I wouldn't eat in real life, uh-huh.

And one of them is whale.

I would like to taste it, but I because I, but I don't, I won't taste it, yeah.

But I mean, he's a genie, so he can get angry.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely.

Sometimes I just see them fighting with greenpeace on the boat, and it looks so crazy, and I think that must be a nice bit of fish.

Don't you think?

Sure, sure, yeah.

I guess that's not the message they're trying to get across to you at the time of those videos, but uh yeah, you can I do the same when I watch like movies with like drug addicts.

I think like well it must have been fun.

Yeah,

it must have been great.

If they're like that about drugs, they must be

yeah, I think meth must be.

Yeah.

It must have something to it.

Yeah.

Touching like me take all these.

Would you like us to give you some meth with them?

I'm not gonna love singing drugs.

Yeah.

If you can guarantee guarantee that I won't get addicted or die or that I'll go public.

And we can ethically source some

whale.

I mean, whales are pretty big, right?

I don't think they'll notice if you just take a little like slither off the side.

And let it carry on.

Yeah, just a bit of Carpaccio.

That'll scab over.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Pose some.

Scab over.

That'll scab over.

Yeah.

Okay, well.

Someone else will point it out to the whale later on.

Do I regret saying that I just want to know what it tastes like, but I don't want to eat it.

Yeah.

What?

I want to know what it tastes like, but I don't want to eat it.

So you want the taste implanted in your head.

Yeah.

But without having to eat the thing.

Yeah.

Once I had a horse by accident.

Have you ever had horse by?

Were you riding a horse and you sort of fell into it?

Like broke quite,

halted quite fast.

No, I didn't.

No?

No.

No, that's silly.

I had it

at a market and we were trying the sausages and

she put it in my mouth.

I didn't like it.

And I said, what is that?

And she said, horse.

So So that's good to know you don't like it.

No, but in the moment, like, I'd rather eat something and be like, oh, that's really nice.

What is it?

It's horse.

And be like, oh, I didn't want to eat horse.

But in the moment, being like, I don't like that.

What is it?

Horse, that's worse.

Because you're like, oh, God, I'll have pork in my mouth.

I liked getting a clean taste that wasn't without me knowing what it was.

So I know that my reaction to it was honest.

Because I just thought it was like pork or something.

So I like that I got to taste it without the stigma

of like, oh no, I'm about to eat a horse because then sometimes that can ruin something.

And then if you don't enjoy it, then you're like, maybe it's the mental factor was getting in the way.

Exactly.

But now I know decisively that I don't like horse.

I know also decisively that I don't like sheep's brain because once on an Australian television show, I was blindfolded it and I was fed up by Nikki Webster, who was the girl that was in the Australian 2000 Olympic opening ceremony, if you remember, she flew in.

She's famous in my country.

And she fed it to me and I was blindfolded and I didn't like it.

So I know I don't like that without the stigma as well.

But maybe it's just the way she fed it to you.

Maybe someone else fed you sheep's brain, someone else from the opening ceremony.

I'm not going to sit here and blame National Church and Nikki Webster for me not liking sheep's brain.

It doesn't have to be someone else in the opening ceremony.

No.

Do you think Josh only gets fed by people who are in the opening ceremony?

It's very specific.

Yeah, yeah.

I've been fed blindfolded by like a lot of C-grade Australian celebrities.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, like a big feet.

About this bird that I want to try, but also you're not allowed to eat it.

And it keeps being in Autolan is the word I'm looking for.

Autolan.

Do you know it?

No.

So it's in succession.

It's in billions, which are two shows that I haven't heard.

But everyone keeps telling me about this scene because they're like, you would love this.

And it's like, it's illegal in France because unethical.

And that's when the French take a traditional French food and make it illegal because of ethics.

Yeah.

Well,

they're still into it.

Yeah.

It used to be illegal here and they brought it back.

In California, they were like, yeah, actually,

we've thought about that, and it's fine.

Yeah.

It's like a little bird.

I don't really know why it's so controversial.

I think maybe it's like quite rare.

And also, they take the bird and they only feed it in the dark.

And they like force feed it the way you would a foie gras.

And then I read that sometimes to kill them, they drown them in Armagnac, but I'm not sure if that's true.

I can't help the flavor of drowning it in art.

It's like, yeah, you can really taste the fear.

All of this is smoke.

Well, and then they eat it.

It's a saw movie.

And then it's a tiny.

These birds have done it's a tiny bird and they eat it with a with a napkin over their head and in succession they say that it's partly to like hide them hide like their shame and partly because it like heightens the senses so it's like so no one can see this like evil thing you're doing when you eat this bird and then you put the bird in whole whole body but you hold it by its beak and then you pull it out and then like you eat the whole bird and all the little shells and all the little bones and stuff

it's like it's like some sort of satanic ritual yeah it sounds crazy doesn't it yeah would you do it if it was not if it wasn't but if if it wasn't mean.

Well, I can't imagine it not being mean.

Yeah, what are you doing

to make that not mean?

Also,

I mean, just in general, I wouldn't want to eat like a bird, a whole bird, holding it by the beak and then scraping it through my mouth and having all the little bones.

I would like to do it.

The bones you chew.

I don't want to imagine even worse.

But do you like if you get like a tempura prawn and you eat the shell on the outside of the prawn, you know?

Or like, do you like that?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I imagine it's like that.

I think the napkin over the head is the step too far for me.

Yeah, not into that.

Well, that's where I think this must be tasty.

Right.

Right, if you're going through all of this, yeah.

I mean,

have you ever tried eating any other foods with a napkin over your head?

No.

No, I don't.

Have a nice chocolate pudding with your napkin over your head.

No, it's got to be evil.

I don't know.

I'm otherwise not a bad guy.

Sure.

Just those are the two things that I'm like, if it was a dream restaurant and it could experience it without it being terrible, that I would be interested in the narrative.

Yeah, yeah.

I mean, I guess you'd in the dream restaurant, it'd be a bird who has voluntarily just hung out in the dark, fed itself all that stuff.

Just

really went on a big bin.

That was just his lifestyle, anyway.

A bit of a goth, kind of just doing that.

And then, like, you know, happily just died naturally

while swimming in a bowl.

And then it was like, okay, now we can drag it through your mouth and have a napkin over your head.

But that would be the dream.

That would be the dream.

You're the genie.

I don't need to see the work.

You know what I mean?

Just make it happen.

So still all sparked in water, Josh.

So I don't like bottled water.

I find it kind of disgusting and creepy.

Because, well, it's banned from the environment, which is a hard sell for me at the moment.

And it's the stage that I care about that.

But I don't like thinking of it having been on the boats and

in the storage, all hot and in the plastic or the glass.

To me, that's more disgusting than the tap.

Also, when you see something, do you think about the whole history of it?

I just find bottled water kind of unsettling.

I just don't know why people think that's more glamorous than tap water.

Because

tap water's all moving and it's just, I just like it better.

But I know that most people don't want to say

when you're like a fancy restaurant, they say about the water.

I always say tap water's fine, yeah, yeah, tap water's fine, and I say it before, like very quickly, so no one else has to feel the shame of it.

You say it before you've even said hello,

you're walking in, and they say, Can we take your coat?

Tap water's fine, tap water's fine,

but if it's one of the places where they have on tap, still unsparkling, like it's filtered out of the tap, you know, they do that and it's free, yeah, sparkling all the time.

No, no, so what was the point?

You still have tap water, still, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I don't make the bubbles with my meal to me, it's like like a treat by itself.

Sure.

Yeah.

Oh, so you drink sparkling water on its own?

Yeah, but not like with a meal.

But you don't, okay.

I can understand that.

Yeah, it's all a bit busy.

I don't want to have a mouthful of food and then a mouthful of sparkling water.

That would feel...

It does weird things to the food, right?

Yeah.

I think my mouth would just be confused.

You know, you've had it before.

Yeah.

But you're acting like you've never done this.

Well, Joe what?

I'm not sure if I have or not.

I've got sparkling water and food.

Yeah.

Of course you have.

I don't know.

This is insane.

I can't pinpoint a certain time.

I gotta go.

I couldn't tell you a specific time I've done that.

Maybe I've never done that.

Are you talking as if you take a mouthful of food and then leave the food in your mouth and take a swig of water and mix it all up?

Oh, no, no, no, no.

No, he hasn't done that.

No, no, no.

I haven't done that.

I would have the food and eat it and swallow it.

And then I'd have the sparkling water, but there's always going to be the flavour of the food still in there.

And then the bubbles come over it.

Are you kidding me?

I wouldn't want to do that.

I don't think I've ever done that.

You have?

No.

Come on.

This is the craziest thing.

Name one time.

Name one time I've done it.

But also, it's like

any fizzy drink is the same effect on your mouth.

You can't name a time.

Yeah, but I can't name it.

It'd be weird if I could name a time you've had sparkling water with a meal, right?

Well, it'd stand out.

Because I've never done it.

I don't know.

I think he's done it.

Yeah, he must have done it.

He's done it, mate.

They're fall for this shit.

It's a weird thing to lie about.

Yeah, it would be.

Exactly.

That's why we're so uncomfortable.

Do you want a napkin over your head when you're having your water?

No, I don't want a napkin over my head unless I'm eating the evil bird.

You don't want it for the whole meal.

We can do it for the whole meal.

We could do like a

veil over you for the whole thing.

No, no, no.

I couldn't be more clear about that.

I only want the napkin over my head if I'm doing something evil.

I'll do it for the whale, but they're not in the meal.

Okay, they're not in the meal.

Neither of them are in the meal.

No.

Why are you pushing the napkin so?

I think it'd be fun.

We haven't had a guest have a napkin over their head for the whole meal yet.

I think it'd be fun to put a napkin.

You can put a napkin over my head if you want.

Maybe the whole tablecloth?

You sit there like a ghost?

Yeah.

Yeah, I'm happy with that.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Papa dums or bread.

So the papadum or bread question always confuses me.

It feels like a very British thing, that question.

Yes.

To be fair, it is.

But like, if there's anything you would normally have at the bread course that maybe that's not bread that you've had before, that you've gone, this is great.

Yeah, okay.

I know the answer.

I just was curious about why papa dumbs were getting such a high.

Yeah, because like if if you're having an Indian meal, that's when instead of the bit where they bring you the bread at another restaurant, they would bring you the poppa dums at this point.

Yeah, and in the UK, I guess we really love going to Indian restaurants and having

that kind of food, being bought some poppadums beforehand.

Sometimes I think to myself, I think I like these better than bread, actually.

And then one day I was like, come on, me and my buddy, yeah, I'm going to do this food podcast.

So you'd pick papadams.

We just feel like those papadums are getting very high billing to put them vows as bread in this question every week.

Obviously, I'm not choosing papa dumbs.

Sometimes I like to do when I well, I don't anymore, but when I made my 20s, I used to always do those very long meals where there's like many, many courses and they try and be interesting.

Yeah.

And there were two bread courses in that, which I really liked.

One was

a croissant made with smoked butter.

Oh.

That's good.

Yeah, very good.

And both of these places were like, the chef, and they say the chef's name, thinks that bread is so important, it should have its own course, right?

Like, it's like they're so esoteric that they brought out the bread halfway through as its own course, right?

And one other guy did like crumpets, which I liked.

But definitely the best bread I've had was, you know, if you go out in Paris and you have like a really, you get, you, it's debaucherous and you stay up all night.

And then once I was like having like a multi-day kind of love affair with this boy, and then we like had a big fun night out long, and then like the bakeries just open and you get like the baguette and like just as they open and it's like warm.

And he got me that.

So if you could arrange

does he have to get it for you?

And then exactly.

it's got to be like with someone who I'm sort of like having a multi-day love affair with that I won't ever really see again.

We've had a really big night and he knows where to go to get the bread and he gets it and gives it to me and we eat it and kiss a bit.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Is it a baguette?

Yeah, it's just a French baguette.

Properly, like, that's nice.

Also, I like the way you said, you know, when you go to Paris and you stay up all night and it's really debauched.

And me and James both are.

Yes.

Yes, we know what that's like.

I know the bread bit.

I've definitely had bread.

I feel like they do it in movies a lot.

Yeah, I know what you mean.

It's just like a whirlwind night where suddenly you find yourself in a bakery.

I've also lived in Paris for a while, used to go and visit.

Yeah, but we didn't stay up all night.

No.

Why not?

The spark has long died out.

It's been discussed on the podcast many times.

This marriage is a last-ditch attempt to get the spark back.

Let me tell you that.

That's what I've always said.

Even when they were in Paris together, Josh, there was no spark.

Yeah, but we weren't we weren't.

And you lived above a bakery.

Yeah, she lived above a bakery.

Can you believe this?

They lived above a bakery in Paris, and you've had a more romantic time in Paris.

No, but you would have got up and got the bread.

Yeah, I got the green on the bread, and then not after

the flat.

Not after night, staying up.

We're not going out all night, are we?

To what end?

Yeah.

Fud each other.

How are you happy?

Stay at home.

Are you single?

Lovely.

No, I'm not.

How's that going?

Lovely.

Okay, he's having a lovely time.

I'm singing.

Never been happier.

Absolutely loving it.

Sparks flying everywhere.

Just you wait.

So, French bread.

Yeah, I mean, so, but also, they just generally love

a French baguette is the best bread to me.

I would take that with that.

Fantastic.

And do you want most of your courses after a multi-day liver fair?

Some of them do that are like pretty specific, yeah.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, but they're not like, but also the food is the food I want.

Yes.

So if you can't be bothered with all the other stuff, if you're tired or whatever, I don't know how many podcasts you're doing today.

If you can't, you know, get all this stuff done.

I get it.

But mostly I want the French baguette.

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So your starter, is that from a specific place as well?

Yeah, I really, I really, really like caviar.

And actually, um, it's expensive, so I just, and I like value, so I feel like I'm not paying for this dinner, right?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, so I'll have caviar.

Um, it's like I've only ever had it maybe twice, uh-huh.

And one time I was in Paris again, which actually makes a lot of sense.

I was with a boy, I was like, my, my, my, I guess my boyfriend, and we were having a fight, which I, which, and, um, we were at a Russian caviar restaurant, which is just such a good place to have a fight.

And

they're like, uh, it's like a, they've got their own, like, it's like posh Russian.

So they've got their own kind of, you know, there's like French service and there's like different countries have their own different kind of service.

They've got their own sort of kind of service, all different like accoutrements that I haven't seen.

Right.

Like you can't eat caviar with a metal.

You have to eat it.

You eat it with like the shell of a, like the

like mother of pearl shell spoons.

Right.

And then there's all this, and they have like a vodka cart as opposed to like a champagne cart.

So it's like, that's all fun.

That's pretty cool.

It is cool.

Yeah.

And we're really mad at each other, but we've been wanting to try this thing at this place.

And it's like a roast potato.

And they cut the top off and then they take all the potato out the middle and they make a mash out of the roast potato.

And then on that, they just put like a bundle of caviar and a creme frage.

It's like a potato skin with caviar on it, right?

Well, no, you don't eat the skin, you eat like the mashed potato out of the sena.

But the mashed potatoes have been made of like roast potato, and it's like it's not this like frou-frouy, you know, like 50% potato, 50% butter thing, which I don't, I don't like much.

You know, people do that.

Do you know what I'm talking about?

Yeah, like

too much butter.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, sometimes 50% these days.

And they put it through the rice, so they're not mashing it, they put it through the rice, and it becomes very like creamy and like soft.

I don't like that.

More like a really.

It's like a puree, right?

I don't like that.

It's like it's like Russian and it's made from like roast potatoes.

It's got like strong potato flavor.

Yeah, and then as you just eat, you just scoop in this like thing of the caveat.

Are you scooping it out of the potato?

Yeah, they still have it in the potato.

Well, and then you don't eat the skin?

I don't think you've eaten the skin.

I'd be so tempted to eat the skin.

I mean, yeah, he'd be beyond tempted if he'd do it.

I'd do it.

I wouldn't

spoon.

I'd just pick up the whole thing and I'd eat like a big potato.

It's not like the skin is like not that clean, I guess.

Yeah.

No, I'm still doing it.

to put him off.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I would still do that.

Feels like the kind of way I would probably end if I was scripting this fight over the thing, I would probably end the scene with the boyfriend

showing me what what by eating the skin of the potato to humiliate me in the Russian Russian caviar restaurant.

Just looking me in the eyes like, I never really looked you anyway.

I just want this.

I want this to be over so much.

I'm going to eat the whole thing.

Yeah.

I'm going to eat this dirty potato.

And then I'd break up with him for humiliating me.

Did the argument add to the flavor of the dish?

I liked the drama of the tension intercut with just the delightfulness of really one of the nicest things I've ever eaten.

Sounds so good.

Yeah.

Were you getting an even amount of like,

did you say like creme fresh?

Was it sour cream?

I think it was creme fresh.

Creme fresh.

I've got a bad memory.

Yeah, potatoes.

Like what ratios were you getting on each scoop or were you just like just going.

I don't think I was putting too much potato on.

I really want the caveat.

Yeah.

Caveat, I mean, again, I rarely, rarely have it.

Yeah.

But it is it is nice.

It's nice.

It tastes a bit like veggie mate.

Okay.

Not something I've ever noticed before.

I think the trick with caviar, I think the way they get you is it's very salty, you know, and like salty snacks are very moorish.

Yeah.

But you can't have any more.

Yeah.

So you like, it's very salty.

You have like a teaspoon of it and you're like, well, that was yum.

I'd like to have that again.

They're like, well, there's a hundred dollars.

Like, oh, yeah.

You need to worry about it.

I think, I mean, has anyone ever had any more?

It like sticks with you, you know?

Yeah.

Like, because you can't, like, it's designed.

It's like if they gave you one, like, cheese-flavored cracker.

Yeah.

You know, those things, they're like really moorish.

I don't know what you call them in your country or whatever those things call themselves.

It's like a Ritz cracker or a mini cheddar.

If you had one of those and then they were like, never again.

Yeah.

You'd be like, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

Take all my money.

I like...

My favourite thing about caviar is when you're supposed to push it to the roof of your mouth, right, and then you can feel it pop.

Yeah.

So I like the ones that you get in Japanese restaurants, which I think are way cheaper.

The salmon row.

Yeah, the salmon row.

But it's eggs, fish eggs.

But because they're much bigger and they pop.

I feel like you got quite tense there on Isaiah.

It's not caveat.

It says fish eggs.

Yeah, it's fish eggs.

But that's that's how I got

this bit of the cross.

But you were like, you were really in the for a second there, you were in the crosshairs.

I just didn't want you to.

As soon as you corrected him, I was like, oh, God,

really?

Oh, yeah.

He really got in there quick.

He's like, yeah, I know what they are.

They buy fish eggs.

They buy fish eggs.

I know.

I felt like I was in the Russian restaurant watching YouTube about to order a meal.

Yeah.

I nearly just grabbed a bottle of vodka from the cart as it came past.

Yeah.

Was that what your argument was about?

Was that you were sitting down with your boyfriend and he was like, I'd love this place.

You go, I've had

you been to the Japanese restaurants.

They get caviar there.

Well, that's not the same as actually salmon rose.

Salmon Rose.

I think you find it's caviar.

And then it like escalated.

Also, that's exactly the sort of thing I would say to someone.

I'd go, it's not a caviar.

I would say that.

So I think that's why when you said it to me, I was like, oh, damn.

Yeah, because he knew it going in.

He got it.

Did you know it, though?

Yeah, I wouldn't describe that as caviar at all.

But you did.

No, I didn't.

It was the link to fish eggs, Josh.

He did say it was caviar.

I was moving the conversation.

I was moving the conversation on.

I'd like to play the tape back.

I think you said, you know, that caviar you get in Japanese ring.

No!

I didn't say that!

I've seen Ed go out for breakfast and have scrambled eggs on toast.

I mean, this caveat is delicious.

Motherfucker.

He thinks it's caviar.

Remember, every Easter you get excited to have your big chocolate caviar, don't you?

You can't wait to eat it.

Big chocolate caviar giving you to you by the Easter bunny.

Well, that sounds amazing.

I mean, that's one of the.

Every now and again, there's a dish that I've never heard of, never tasted on this podcast that I really immediately want to eat.

And that's definitely one of them.

I really want to try that.

And I can imagine the setting.

And, yeah, right.

Have you been to Bob Bob Ricard in London before?

No.

It's great.

It's really fun.

What about Bob Bob Ricard?

All the decors are all done up like the Orient Express.

That sounds really good.

But they've got like their big thing that does very well for them is in every booth they've got a button that just says press for champagne.

And then when you press there, they bring over champagne.

Oh, I have been there.

Yeah.

Oh, you have been there.

Yeah, no, I haven't.

You can't remember the name of it, the decor, what it was.

You just remember the button.

I remember the button.

Yeah, you remember this face with the press for champagne button.

Yeah.

So your main course?

Okay, so

I was in Tokyo.

My friend had an exchange student that used to live with her there.

So they took us like around.

And so there's like, it was very hard for this whole thing to not be about that weekend.

One of the things we tried, which is not what I'm putting on there, was blowfish.

which, as you can imagine, was very thrilling for me because I like food to be weird and dangerous.

And blowfish can kill you.

And it's not something you can just go out and eat, right?

You need like the chefs have to train for like ages and ages.

I don't need to explain how blowfish is.

We've all seen The Simpsons.

Yeah, I've all seen The Simpsons, right?

Yeah.

And at this restaurant, because a lot of restaurants in Japan, you know, they just do one thing, which is really fun.

So if you go to a place called,

yeah, well, someone do caviar, those are the things that they probably wouldn't caviar.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, no, they that's not, um, yeah.

Um,

and then uh, they uh,

you know, the place just says mackerel, this place just says blowfish, and it's like multi-course, and they you get blowfish every way.

So, like, you walk in, and all the tanks are like filled with blowfish around you, and then you sit down, and then you have blowfish every way imaginable.

You get, um, like blowfish sashimi, like fried blowfish.

They make like a soup at the table where they put the blowfish in, and they do, like, I think pansiered blowfish.

I'm just making up different ways of cooking.

Then they brought out blowfish testicles.

What?

Whoa!

And we ate uh blowfish testicles, which are like this big white, puffy ball.

So you can like Google them.

So the testicles puff up with the fish?

I don't know whether the pepper

they're like big and kind of foamy and white and they've got like a kind of like the top has been kind of like I guess they put it under a grill or something.

So it's like a little like caramelise on top.

And then

testicle brulee sort of thing.

I said caramelise, I mean more like just browned a little bit.

And

there's no sugar in there, you know.

So how big in comparison to the blowfish itself?

So I think I think it must, when it cooks, blow up.

Yeah.

So

it's like half a fist.

I can't remember.

I don't know how to,

there's not a good seismic.

Yeah.

Bigger than you would think.

Okay.

That's all I need to know.

Yeah.

Bigger than I would think.

Bigger than you.

I'm thinking about it, and I've made it bigger.

Yeah, there was like four of us, and we all had a bit of it.

They gave you one.

I think the whole time we're just eating one blowfish.

Oh, wow.

And they cross it out and you eat the whole blowfish.

I don't know.

It's hard to really know.

So they must give you two testicles, right?

Yeah, I think there's two in the bowl.

Actually, maybe we had three.

So that doesn't make sense.

I don't know anything about a blowfish.

No.

Join me in a Google and I'll show you a picture.

It doesn't seem that interesting for people at home at all.

I think I can safely say it's not the last thing I want to see.

So that was interesting.

Oh, and then at the end, just when you think they've done it all, they had a dried blowfish fin and they dip it in sake and lit it on fire and then put it back in the sake and then you drink the sake.

That's crazy.

I mean, that guy was making it up as well

guys we've got we've promised them 15 blowfish courses and we've really run out of stuff yeah dry the fin set it on fire put it inside yeah did it change the flavor of the sake because you

did it i didn't like sake back then yeah so i don't think i really i've only had it once or twice so it was you know now i love it but back then i didn't really like it so i don't know what it was meant to taste like or what it did i burnt myself out on it i did i'd never had it before then i did like a tasting course thing uh at uh at like this convention You just go around and try all the different sake.

And then halfway through, I was like, I think I like sake.

And then by the end, I was like, I'm never drinking this again.

Did you ever have like the brown sake?

Like the kind of more like...

No, I had that once and never again.

I had jellied sake.

Have you had that before?

You get it in little cans.

I'm in little cans, and it's like lemon-flavoured, jellied sake.

I love that.

That's a real treat.

Yeah, sometimes they take that to like a picnic with my friends.

Like a little treat, you know.

That does sound nice, but I love that one.

Yeah, you know, I would love that one.

I love the jelly one, yeah.

You wouldn't otherwise have sake?

No, I've had it, but I wasn't mad into it.

But, like, I feel like you get a lot of, like, a lot of the sake here is shit.

Uh-huh.

You know, and that's like a problem.

And then, like, I've no one knows how to navigate their menu.

So, it's like, how do you know what you're ordering?

You know,

it's like for the jelly.

Like, sometimes people are like, I had sake with shit.

It was like, but yeah, but if you have, like, two wines in your life, you're not going to like it.

Yeah.

For your main course, you want the testicles.

No.

I want.

Another thing we did that weekend.

Well, another, like, really special special meal that weekend was we went to his grandma's house and his grandma made us like full Japanese breakfast with like all the little like containers of like miso salmon and rice and like pickles and all this stuff.

Amazing.

That's really good.

And like an old like Japanese town.

That's like a real dream.

But my favorite thing I ate there, because one of my favorite Japanese foods is eel on rice.

You know, with like the barbecue sauce.

Yeah.

And

they took us to this place and it's like a little, it's like in the country.

It's like a little like Japanese kind of style like kind of like building like you'd imagine.

And then because we're tourists they take us out the back and they had like hundreds of um eels in these tanks like slithering around and there was blood everywhere and then um you order the eel and they like kill it and cook it there in the little hut

and then um

that and that's what i'm having

bring out the napkin

yeah you don't want to get under a napkin for this no

it's fine to eat it

there was a lot of blood yeah it was like we ordered it and then they took us us out.

Yeah, that was more blunt than we probably wanted.

But it's the best eel you've ever had.

Oh, yeah, I'm sure.

And it's one of my favorite dishes.

So it's like the best version of

my best dish.

Yeah, yeah, that's fresh.

Is it freshwater eel?

Is it unagi, is that right?

Is that the word?

I guess so.

Yeah, it's really delicious.

I know with the barbecue on top and it's really delicious stuff.

It's really nice.

And I feel like it's never like,

I know it was one of these things I feel like you're never getting that good quality because there's like so much sauce in it.

Why would they bother?

know, okay, yeah, yeah, sure.

It's like you're gonna like

food courts and stuff, and it's like it's delicious anyway.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you know, but

you need it in the blood hut, right?

You do it in the blood hut, yeah, yeah, that adds something.

It's like you really have to go to a special place to get them to kill the eel fresh.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

You just don't see that much, you don't see that much, you know?

Yeah, the fresher the better.

You wanna see the look in its eyes

as it dies as it realizes, and then you get to eat it.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Okay.

Fair enough.

Eel from the blood hut in.

What's your side dish with that?

Well, that's okay, but it comes with rice, right?

So it could, you know, if you.

You're picking fucking rice.

Fuck you.

Say fuck you directly into the microphone, please, Josh.

Fuck you.

Why isn't there not an amuse bouche?

Oh, sometimes there is.

Sometimes there is.

Sometimes I do amuse bouches, but today I like it.

Today, the amuse bouche was spit.

And I was also as surprised as you.

Well,

I like just like a little palate cleanser.

I don't really care what it is.

You don't care what the palate cleanser is.

You know, like a little, like a little, just a little something.

Yeah, okay.

We'll get you a little something.

Yeah, a little something.

Yeah, I don't want to skip it.

That's a nice cause.

There you go.

Have I have some buttered peas?

Peas are my least favourite thing.

Maybe I'm a bit sick.

I hit upon the least favourite thing.

Also, he went buttered peas, and I could see our producer just literally lean around to me with frowning, just going, what the fuck is he talking about?

Buttered peas.

They said anything.

That's not an amusement.

But it's got to be a palette cloud.

You want an amusement.

Amoozbouche is at the beginning.

Yeah, that's the beginning.

And we missed that, which is annoying.

I like, that's my favorite thing.

So you want a palette clowns a sort of dish as your side dish to take you into the dessert?

I just need some clear thinking time on the side dish.

A little sorbet, perhaps?

A little sorbet.

Let's see the main meal, so we'll give it a savoury sorbet.

A cucumber sorbet.

Cucumber sorbet.

Yeah, I'll top you with the side dish if I get like at the beginning in a mousse bouche and I want.

I had it like last week, it was like a pork crackling with like salt and vinegar stuff on it.

The restaurant pour out.

That was nice.

We can have that at the beginning.

I can have that at the beginning, and I'll have as a palate cleanser.

You know, I like it when they like once I like something, like when they put like campari in it,

like a campari sorbet or like a little

some some like compressed watermelon.

I don't know why they do that, but I mean, for someone who was struggling to come up with something and then land on campari sorbet and compressed watermelon.

That's

just uh

campari sorbet, compressed watermelon.

Fine, thank you very much.

Is that my side dish?

Yeah,

that's going to be your little palate cleanser leading you through to the next course.

Not a lot of vegetables on this meal.

Green potato.

Yeah, vegetables aren't any fun.

You can't watch them get bled to death.

you can eat the watermelon in a hut where there's loads of seeds everywhere if you want yeah yeah that'll make you feel better but then who gets hurt yeah come on what's the point you can draw a face on the watermelon yeah yeah really screaming like Wilson yeah

your drink um

usually I would get like whatever I get a cocktail because I like to see what they've got going on yeah but I reflected on that today and I realized um that they're never good yes correct i'm exactly i feel exactly the same i always fall for it yeah i always go oh that's interesting and then i taste it like i don't like that it's not good and i always want to see like what the restaurant's doing and the wine i kind of feel like i can buy this from the shop yeah

you know so the ones i had to buy expensive wine i was really mad about it uh we went to this restaurant and the cheapest wine they had was just so expensive you know usually there's like one you can get away with right yeah and i was like 25

and we had to buy it it was 180 euro which is a lot.

Yeah.

It was like way more than I would ever.

And I was upset, really upset.

We're like at a really beautiful restaurant that's like carved into the side of a cliff or something under this like old town right in Europe.

And I'm just so upset that I've just spent this money on this wine.

And then it came out and it was, it was delicious enough.

Right, great.

It was delicious enough to pay for that.

Like it was like, I was like, I was like so worried that this wine was going to come out that I just spent 180 euro and I was like so upset about it.

And I was worried it was going to come out and not be good.

And then it it came out with uh I don't know how to say things it's chazan montrachet do you know how to say it better no that sounds good what was it just chazan montrache okay yeah great chazan montrace montrache yeah yeah yeah you guys can do french better than me though i mean no you're talking to james a castle this guy can't say anything yeah that's true

yeah yeahzan montracher montrache yeah chazan montrache shazam sozam wine chazam what you say

Yeah, it's Shazam What You Say.

And that was my favourite wine.

What?

Is it red?

Is it white?

It's white.

It's like,

I'd say it's like similar to like Chardonnay.

It's like from a region.

It's from a region.

From a region.

I know the kind of wine you're talking about here.

And it's not.

I don't know.

It's just wine I had once that just...

It's just, I've never, I've never, like, really, because I was so upset.

I've never had something cheer me up as good.

Yes, okay.

The base point was very low.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So I just was like, it was just such a relief that actually it was like precious wine that I liked.

Yeah, so what it's wine so good that it can win you around.

Yeah, it won me around even though.

And like my boyfriend at the time was with me and he was like just so annoyed that I wouldn't cheer up because we're like at this very beautiful restaurant.

Was this the guy from the Russian restaurant as well?

No, it's different.

It's been a long time.

So it's a different argument.

No, this is not an argument.

Um, this is not an argument.

This is like him giggling and trying to cheer me up, but I just won't come around.

I just won't come around.

And then the yeah, I did because the whole night was fine.

Fantastic.

A bottle of that.

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Your dessert.

So this I struggle with, I really love desserts, okay?

But it's hard to find a dessert that's that special because like they put sugar in all of them and that's really nice.

So like sometimes you'll go to like a restaurant or you'll go somewhere special and they'll put all this effort in and it's good, but it's not that much better than a Twix, you know?

Just isn't.

And

so I found it hard to pick like a special one.

I was in Thailand on Christmas and we're on the beach and we're on this like weird island and my dad's girlfriend is Thai and she like found these little sticky date,

sticky rice like parcels that have like banana in them.

Yeah.

And I'd always seen them at the markets.

I didn't know what was in them, you know.

And I really loved them.

And I was just really glad that she opened me up to this world of the little sticky date banana things.

But that's not what I'm picking.

Okay.

I think the key to heightening a dessert to a point that it's special is freshly baked.

I think it's like the key.

In LA, actually, one of the good things they do in America is chocolate chip cookies.

Like they're actually amazing.

Yeah.

And they do them a lot.

But in LA, so I won't pick that.

I'll pick something from Australia because I mean, I can just go get it, you know?

Just like a waste of a genie.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Sure.

In Australia, they do, I don't think, do they, I think this is an Australian thing, like hot jam donuts.

Oh, hot, they're not that special.

They're just like a hot donut.

Yeah, they serve it hot with like jam and like put the cinnamon sugar on it, but they serve it hot, often out of like trucks or like at music

or something.

Oh, yeah.

And it's like, uh, like they've just made them.

So they just fried them.

Yeah.

And then they inject the jam in.

And then they inject the jam and they give it to you like really quickly.

Yeah.

And you walk around like a market or a festival eating like the hot jam donut.

Yeah, sounds very good.

Because I think I'm not really a donut guy unless they're hot.

So, I didn't know that other countries were just serving them cold.

So, we serve them cold as well, but I would never.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And then, uh, yeah, have you had donuts here, though?

No, oh man, they're really good.

Did we have a donut?

No, we had a donut thing the other night at bestia, didn't we?

Oh, by that point, I was jokingly.

But that's not, that's not like if you're at bestia, I don't think the donut thing is really it's like the doughnuts they bring to set are like

their everyday doughnuts are like

those like pink ones and then they've got like the bear claws because they because I filmed a show here and they don't they they won't work unless they're like within 25 feet of like donuts.

Yeah, it's like the law here.

It's like the unions and I learn all about them like the maple bars and the bear claws.

Bear claws because you know they have apple in them like an apple turnover but like

in a doughnut.

Right.

I didn't know that because I've seen them.

Yeah.

I remember that one of the cops on Dexter would always have a bear claw.

Yeah exactly.

So I've heard of of them so much.

They've got apple in them.

Right, okay.

They only had that on Dexter because they were just on set.

Yeah, he was just constantly being like, oh, I'll make this part of my character.

So I'll always have a bear claw.

Yeah.

And then I would always, so I would try new ones every day.

Great.

The maple bars, maple syrup on top, which is like...

really good.

Yeah.

You don't get that.

Do you get that in Britain?

No, no.

You don't get this kind of, and I'll ask them questions about them and they look at me like I'm so stupid.

About the doughnuts.

And there's different types of batter.

Did you know this?

No.

So there's yeast risen, and then there's like cake batter ones.

And people have like strong preferences.

And on set, like, you have both.

Yeah.

Right.

You have to have both.

Yeah, there's like different textures of doughnuts.

In fact, on my show, they get the donuts from three different locations.

Wow.

I don't know why.

Wow.

But the best ones, if you're going to get them.

The budget on your show must be fucking insane.

There's like a whole column for donuts.

Americans are crazy with donuts.

Very important.

I put on a lot of weight.

But if you're going to get a donut here to try the best one, you've got to get the ones they're made with potato flour.

So they make it with potato flour, which I don't know what that does is, you know, like the outside of a chip or something, it gets like a nice

crisp texture.

That texture,

you kind of get like a bit of that on the outside of the donut.

And then the inside is like very light and it's yeast risen.

I would always get yeast risen, not the cake ones.

That's what we have in Australia.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That sounds great.

So you want a hot yeast risen donut with potato flour with jam in the middle for your dessert?

I don't know if I want that with potato flour.

I want the Australian one.

You can have the Australian one.

Yeah, and I will.

Okay, well, I'll read your order back to you now.

First of all, before any of it started, you're having an amuse bouche, which is the pork scratches with the salt and the vinegar.

Yeah.

You're having tap water.

You're having a fresh French baguette in debauched Paris.

That's what I've got written down here.

Starter, mashed roast potato with caviar and creme frache after an argument.

During the argument.

It's gotta be during the argument.

Main course:

eel killed in the bloodshed or whatever it was.

Blood hut.

The blood hut.

Yeah.

On rice with barbecue sauce.

Side dish, it's like a campari sorbet.

It was really just a palate cleanser that you want.

Kampari sorbet and compressed watermelon.

You needed an apple, that's right.

And your drink, the

shazan mantra she.

Shashan mantra She

wine

in a in a restaurant that's carpeted on the side of a cliff

while you're still having an argument.

No, that wasn't an argument.

No, well you're sulking.

You're sulking and somebody's trying to cheer you up.

And there's a hot jam doughnuts from Australia.

I'm guessing you're about to argue with someone.

No, that's not a nice date.

Yeah, that's a nice end.

That's a lovely end to the day.

You know what?

I like it when the poshness of the situation contrasts with the mood.

Yeah, that i really like yeah but that's walking around a market or like hopefully like we're at like a music festival and it's been raining for a few days and we're like cold and everything and then we get the market and then we get the hot donuts and we like yeah we like hide under an umbrella it's lovely you're sort of your um menu sort of really tracks a whole relationship because quite a few actually

like romantic time debauch night in paris uh argument sulk and then everything sort of comes together at the end because the food sometimes you can eat like really tasty food but it's just you forget or it's boring.

Or sometimes you have like, you know, sometimes you'll go out and like someone will, like an agent or someone will take you to like a fancy dinner, but it doesn't taste good because you're like with your agent or whatever.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Or like, I don't know, whoever the business person is,

ad sales team or something.

And they're like, this is the best, whatever, beef.

Yeah.

But it doesn't taste good because I'm with them.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, they should say, like, this is the best restaurant in Hollywood.

Warning beforehand, I am going to ruin the flavor of it with my presence.

but like you should come back here with someone that you want to have a fight with at some point because it is oh it's so good if you're mid argument or soul kid.

This is a really good place.

Josh, thank you so much for coming to the dream restaurant.

Thanks guys.

Thank you Josh.

Well there we are.

What a nice menu.

I I really like the s the selection of a little song.

Yes.

Ah, fantastic.

Also, you know, we don't normally record the uh intros and outros a whole year after interviewing the guest.

And it's really nice just to

reflect on it now and how our lives were so different

a year ago.

Oh, man.

It's really cheap.

He did say Bean Sprouts.

Really appreciate that.

No.

When the last

gym sales.

And who knew that was the last live theatrical event that I was going to go to?

I think that might be the last video I ever saw live.

And you know what?

If I'd known that, I wouldn't have gone.

Thank you, Zejosh.

Do go check out his shows.

Please like me, and everything is going to be okay.

And thanks for listening, guys.

We're going to be back again next week, I don't imagine.

Please, I will love to be back next week.

Thank you very much.

See you in the evening.

Hello, I'm Carrie Add.

I'm Sarah.

And we are the Weirdos Book Club Podcast.

We are doing a very special live show as part of the London Podcast Festival.

The date is Thursday, 11th of September.

The time is 7pm, and our special guest is the brilliant Alan Davies.

Tickets from kingsplace.co.uk.

Single ladies is coming to London.

True on Saturday, the 13th of September.

At the London Podcast Festival.

The rumours are true Saturday, the 13th of September at King's Place.

Oh, that sounds like a date to me, Harriet.