AJ Brown, NFL Preview With Kevin Clark, Hard Knocks Episode 1 + Mt Rushmore Of Skills We Wish We Learned When We Were Younger

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On today's part of my take, we have a twofer for the people.

We got AJ Brown, Super Bowl champion.

Awesome interview with him from Eagles Camp.

And then we have Kevin Clark from ESPN, formerly the ringer.

Come stop in the studio.

Little NFL preview was so awesome just just talking about the entire league, teams that we think are on the rise, teams that are going to suck.

It just feels good talking football with the boys.

We're going to do the Mount Rushmore of skills we wish we learned when we were younger.

We have Hot C Cool Throne of Muscless in Hot C Cool Throne.

Hank is back and he brought it.

And then we're going to finish with guys on chicks.

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Today is Wednesday, August 6th, and we had hard knocks.

Football is back.

That's my review.

Yeah, hard knocks happen.

This is you can set you can set your watch to this exact week every single year.

Our excitement for hard knocks and then our disappointment once we remember that, oh, yeah, hard knocks is just going to be like a 45-minute commercial for whatever team they happen to be profiling because otherwise no teams would ever do it and the NFL wouldn't allow it.

So

it was, we saw football.

We saw some nice slow-motion throws.

We saw Deion Dawkins driving like a maniac, putting his kid in a drift seat.

I didn't know that they made drift seats and child seat versions.

That was awesome.

And they like ice cream.

Yeah.

That's my hard knocks.

It was

every time we get to this point in the calendar, I do get excited because hard knocks does hold a special place in my heart because it usually is, we always do the football is back, football is back.

I know the Hall of Fame game, but this is really like, oh, hard knocks.

Like, you're watching them in camp.

They're talking about the season.

It feels like it's all coming around.

But yeah, it's really just, and especially because the bills are good.

That's the, that's the difference.

Like, usually they would not let playoff teams in.

I did like the, it was probably about 15 of the 45 minutes.

It was just like Josh Allen is the greatest human ever.

That was cool.

And then, yeah, the ice, the ice cream was probably the big takeaway.

Tradavious White, very bad cone management, but otherwise, that ice cream looked incredible.

And then the only other note I had was Dawson Knox,

salute to you.

Very relatable moment where in front of his wife, he packed his bag and just jammed everything in.

And then his wife's like, well, you can't do that.

Let me do it.

And then she perfectly packed the bag for him.

Like, that was just a genius move by him because everyone does that.

Where we just throw everything in there and it's all wrinkle.

Like, it almost, the way I pack, as I'm putting my clothes in there, they get wrinkled.

Like they get wrinkled on touch of the suitcase.

And then the wife comes and just like, here, Dawson, let me just do this for you and make it so it's perfect.

So great job.

I know what you're doing, dude.

Yeah, it's a classic trick.

Oh, I don't have any idea how to pack this suitcase.

What do you mean my t-shirts are going to get wrinkly?

I don't understand.

Oh, you want to do it?

Oh, that's awesome.

You're so sweet.

I bet they've been married for less than two years.

That seems like a relatively newlywed thing.

I will always love hard knocks.

I usually like it when the coach gets up and you get to see a little bit of personality from the coach giving the welcome to Training Camp speech and they just like rip into something because they've had all summer to prepare.

We saw that with Rex Ryan.

We saw that with everybody, for the most part, every team.

I mean, even last year, Eberflues, I was like, maybe Eberflues has the pulse of this team.

Leader of men question mark.

But this, it's bullshit that they didn't show the Sean McDermott training camp pop-up speech, especially if he had like the redacted 28 pages that he was going to talk about.

But like, you know what I'm talking about.

Like, when he's talking to the team and he's like screaming at them and getting them fired up, that's what I love to see out of hard knocks and training campaign.

We didn't get that, so I'm a little upset.

Yeah, yeah, I wish you hadn't just said Eberflues's name because I actually was thinking about that while watching this.

I was texting my friend John Greenberg, who does great work on the athletic, and saying, like, remember when basically Harden HBO tried to pitch to everyone that Iber Flues was a cool guy who totally was competent.

That was last year's hard knocks for how the Bears season went was basically triumph of the will.

That was just straight propaganda.

It was as propaganda as it gets.

So, but at least the bills are good.

I will say also the new stadium looks awesome.

The wind shit,

Hank, that had to fuck you up a little.

Although, maybe, would you say that confirms wind isn't real?

Or they had to do the science.

Weather isn't real, but wind is

wind is real, but weather isn't real real

for over-unders.

Weather isn't real.

Okay.

Okay, so.

I mean, they designed the stadium.

When they showed the stadium, I was like, I hope they talk about how it gets the wind out.

And then they spent the next six minutes talking about the science behind it and how it's engineered to absolutely make it still to play playoff games, which I think is probably good for the sport, but also the wind didn't really seem to affect Josh at home.

No.

No, but you also have to think this is a stadium that they're building for the next hundred years.

Josh Allen's probably not going to play for another 100 years.

Yeah.

But

classy move by Josh Allen.

Call him Mr.

Pagula the whole time, too.

I love that.

When a grown man calls himself a grown man Mr., you have to when it's the owner,

especially when he signed that big check.

Yeah.

Yeah.

All right.

What are the other two things you had?

All right.

Two other things.

A.J.

Epeneza, absolute psychopath.

Crazy.

Caught a snake with his bare hands.

Wait.

AJ Epenezza, psychopath.

That dog is the craziest dog of all time.

He has a dog that barks when he sees a snake.

Like the whole time he's watching.

Yeah.

Get that dog away from the snake.

No, but the dog is trained to hunt snakes.

Well, not even to hunt snakes.

The dog is trained to locate snakes and be like, hey, hey, hey, dad, there's a snake over here.

Come get it.

I know what you're saying, but I'm saying, like, I watched that clip.

I was like, please get that dog away from the snake.

That snake's going to kill the dog.

I think the dog knew what it was doing, and I think it has trust, implicit trust in its owner.

Like, if I was that dog's owner and it saw a snake, that dog would get the fuck out of there and be like, hey, let's bounce.

Yeah.

But

I'm not like a six-foot-three linebacker that's jacked up.

And then he goes over there, just grabs the snake.

An 11-foot-long snake.

How is how is that even possible?

Ask Hank, the AI videos.

Hey, Hank, did you see that river with the Anacondas breeding?

Scary.

There was scary.

There's about

60,000 anacondas that this drone shot got.

Looks so real.

And the giant Anaconda.

Oh, yeah.

And the big one.

That one was real.

That one was so real.

Okay, what was your other note?

My other note, Bills fans, turn off the podcast or just fast forward like 30 seconds right now if you're a Buffalo Bills fan.

I'm pretty sad for Bills Bills fans.

I'm pretty sad because it is just

it's kind of great to watch Bills fans.

I love Bills fans, they're great people, they love their football team.

Like, this is you don't have to go out of your way to make propaganda showing that Bills fans are awesome people.

Yes.

But the belief and the hope that they have, like, this is our year.

We're finally going to get done.

We're doing it for all the old guys that made four Super Bowls in a row, didn't win a single one.

I'm, I'm pretty sad for them.

And I hope that I'm wrong.

I hope that I'm wrong, but I am pretty sad.

Bills fans are the best.

It was also actually cool being, because we were there two years ago, three years ago.

I like that the Bills do do it old school at a small college dormitory.

There's what they say,

five teams in the entire NFL do that.

I like that.

And we got to see that.

We were there.

We were in the dorm room.

So I know this is dumb brain shit, but I was like, oh, shit.

I know what that looks like.

I was also there.

Yeah.

I know.

That's all I got.

That place exists.

That's a real spot.

I know it because I put it there.

Yeah, I know that's really stupid, but it really, like, if you've been somewhere that's not, that is then on TV, you're the whole time you're like, oh, shit, I know that place.

I also, yeah, I saw that once.

Hank, your review.

Okay, good job, Hank.

Football's back.

Football's back.

And yeah, I love hard knocks and football is back.

Okay.

Every year, I love this first episode.

It reminds me so much that football is back.

Zach, your review.

And it will be the last episode I watch.

You're muted, Zach.

But it looks like you're making a great point.

I think that hard knocks is about to get so hard knocked.

Okay.

And that uh

i i uh i hope the best for the bills as well so what was your favorite scene

i i have been hearing a lot about this uh ice cream sunda that was being made

possibly that could be constructed at a later date okay

did you did you have like a favorite spot big cat where like like maybe popped off the page a little bit No, I think my favorite spot is PFT and I are going to are going to gift you an HBO subscription.

So we're going to get that for you because we know you're going to get two of them.

Yeah.

I appreciate that, guys.

I can try to lock in with.

I know my brother might have one, so maybe I'll hop in there.

Like I should have done that earlier, but that's on me.

Okay, can we get a quick?

I was going to say, can we just get a quick visual of your apartment?

It looks nice.

This is...

This is me at the desk.

We've got TV

or bed.

Wait, sorry.

That's a sick kitchen V setup.

And then...

That's a nice place.

Desk.

Yeah.

Oh, the double monitors.

Look at that.

Whoa, Zach.

Oh, my God.

I like that look, I know, but so functional.

Okay.

Where would you eat the McDonald's?

Right here.

Okay, nice.

This is where all meals are consumed.

Yeah, this is it.

This is the chair.

How many hours a night are you sitting at that desk?

Most of the hours until I'll all the hours until I go to bed if we're going to be.

On like a Saturday, like a full Saturday.

Nice Saturday this past weekend.

It was beautiful out.

Majority of my hours, which should is going to, I'm going to do less hours, a lot of hours right now.

No, there's nothing.

Fuck it.

It's so many hours.

It is.

It is.

Be yourself.

All right, what are you going to say, PFT?

Well, the one thing that we learned when we were at Bill's camp was they spend most of their time when they're not practicing, just straight up playing video games against each other.

That's like the only thing.

It's basically like college.

I think that hard knocks after week one should just be them streaming, playing each other in video games.

I would love it.

I would love it.

That would be more interesting.

That would be a better show.

Yeah, I'd agree.

Okay, what else?

So we taped the rest of the show in studio.

Do we have anything else besides the fact that the NFL is banning smelling salts and we got to stand on the soapbox for our guy, George Kittle, because it's bullshit.

And let me just say this.

First they come for the NFL, then they're going to come for podcasters.

And some of the best episodes of this show have been after we've done smelling salts.

Yeah.

They're trying to outlaw dudes rocking.

It's crazy.

It's crazy.

Is the NHL going to have to now, too?

Like, are they forcing other leagues?

I don't know.

I read a little bit about it.

Smelling salts give you a sales?

Yeah, smelling salts give you concussions.

That's what I gathered.

Some of the symptoms or after effects of taking smelling salts, inhaling ammonia salts, are similar to the after effects of concussions.

Yeah, like if you just rip a smelling salt, you're not going to do great on an IQ test because you're just feeling it like how jacked you are.

So I don't know if they did the test like 30 seconds after, 10 seconds after, five minutes after,

but I don't know.

All I can say for sure is I've ripped probably 400 smelling salts in my life, and I turned out fine.

Yeah,

it might be

the

the Bills game against the Texans last year.

Do you remember when Josh got hit and then he did the smelling salts and he was very concussed and he came back in?

Could have been that.

But I do stand with George Kittle.

I think you got to listen to the players on the, you can't, if, you know what, you know what Godell is probably doing?

This is probably one of those things where he's getting ready for the next CBA already.

He knows they don't have a union, like a union head.

They've got an interim guy.

He's taking away smelling salts and then he's going to say, I'll give you back smelling salts if you play an 18th game.

Yeah, yeah.

Something's coming out of the players' paychecks or livelihoods, and then you're going to get smelling salts back, and they'll be like, this rocks.

I will say, shout out Red Bird Rizzy.

He had a good idea.

He said, let's hypothetically say I get a sideline pass for every game and keep a pocket full of salts.

Pocket smelling technically isn't illegal.

So if George Kittle just goes and smells this guy's pocket every single before every single drive, that's not illegal.

Or fingers.

Do you just have a guy

soaking his hands in the ammonia and then going up, be like, smell my finger?

Face masks made out of smelling salts.

Yeah.

We can get around this, right?

We've got to figure out a way around it.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I think we're just, I mean, you just go into the blue tent.

I guess that.

See, NFL, you've now made it even more confusing.

Because now guys have to go in the blue tent, do the smelling salts, and then you don't know if they're concussed or not.

That's your fault, Roger.

And wouldn't you rather have them doing it in a safe location, not behind closed doors?

Yeah,

I would agree.

Let's just be honest.

Give every team an X allotted amount of salts, and they can divvy them up how they want.

I like that.

Yeah, I agree.

Starters only.

Well, I like that because then you could basically be like at the end of the season, you're like, oh, shit, the Ravens got a big game in Kansas City, but they've used all their smelling salts.

How do we handicap that?

You have to think about it.

Yeah.

And then you have like some no salts games against some cupcake opponents, and then you, then you, that's when you bet on the underdog.

Yeah.

That's how you imagine not taking it seriously.

Yeah, the trash talk in college football being like, we're not even going to use our smelling salts on you.

We know that we'll beat you no matter what.

Yep.

This is open some doors.

All right.

Do we have anything else?

Yeah, there's a couple things.

Okay.

It's death chart season.

So the first death charts have come out.

There's really nothing to take from any of them except for the Saints.

And for the Saints' death chart, they listed all three of their quarterbacks as first teamers.

They've got three starters.

I know if you have two quarterbacks, you don't have one, but what if you have three?

That's tough.

That's tough.

I don't really know.

Memes isn't on this call, is he?

No, he's not.

I was going to ask for a custom meme where it's the dragon, the dragon meme, where two are great and then one is like goofy, but all three are goofy.

Felt like that would be a good one for them.

And then the other news that I had was that ESPN acquired NFL Network.

Obviously, we talked about the red zone a little bit already.

So they have NFL Network.

They have that entire thing under their wing.

Now they're going to let the NFL Network keep producing some of their shows, but also now the NFL,

as part of this deal, has a 10% equity stake in ESPN.

So the NFL

now officially owns ESPN, as opposed in the past, where all they could do was, let's just go ahead and give them all their shittiest games for Monday Night Football and make them do whatever we want them to do.

Then we'll start trickling out good games to them.

Now they officially have a 10% ownership stake in ESPN.

Yeah, Florio's all over this.

All over this.

So just remember it.

Remember it.

Just think about it.

I'm glad that Florio is all over this, but I don't know what differences we're going to see, but I do think that the NFL is going to make it way less likely for

other media companies to conduct interviews with NFL players.

That's what I think.

Yeah.

I mean, it's like what we said on Monday.

I think that ESPN will not rock the boat to start.

And then when they have to make more money, they'll start shoving ads.

And then we'll just be screwed.

And we'll be like, well, we have problem is they have us.

That's really what the issue is with all of these

big

conglomerates and big companies joining forces.

They got us.

They got us.

We're going to watch no matter what.

They got us.

We cannot do anything except complain on Twitter.

And we will, but they got us.

The smelling salts might be a bridge too far for some people.

There's definitely one guy out there that saw the smelling salts news.

He's like, fuck it, I'm out.

They can only push a man so far.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Oh, the NFL's gone woke.

No smelling salts.

But then maybe there's one person who comes back because they're like, smelling salts killed my father.

And now I can

watch the NFL again.

The only other thing I had was I'm turning into Frank Fleming because the Cubs season is spiraling right now and the Brewers never lose.

And I literally have been saying, I've been repeating to myself over and over, the brewers never lose and like i i wish i had something to chew on because i'm getting that frustrated they have they're on a 119 game win streak clip like the like from may 25th on i think they won they're like 44 and 16 so it would be a 119 uh winning season they just never fucking lose they never lose all they do is win they never lose

buster's head smiling yeah yeah it's all happening um

okay oh yeah and And Schwarber should be MVP because he hit, but we talk about that a little bit later.

He did hit two home runs on Monday night.

They were fucking mammoths.

All right.

We got Hot Cool Trone.

A must-less in Hot C Cool Throne because Hank's back.

Mount Rushmore of skills we wish to learn when we were younger.

Kevin Clark in studio NFL preview.

Great interview with AJ Brown and Guys on Chicks loaded show.

Let's go.

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Tell them old Decenter.

Yeah.

Hank, hot seat, cool throne.

My hot seat is the Speedway Classic.

Yeah?

Okay.

Wait, we got more news about this?

This might be a...

No, this is a good question.

No, we talked about it.

All right, whatever.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

You know what this is?

I think this could be a new segment.

Hank's recap of the last part of my ticket.

Yeah.

What was the Spirit Classic?

Whatever.

We talked about it Sunday.

My hot seat is.

Yeah.

No, no, we didn't.

No, we did.

We did.

No, no, I want to hear what the Spirit Classic went on.

It was a disaster.

Listen, you were here in body.

I know.

Your body was.

Mind, spirit.

Body was physical.

I was reading more about it yesterday, and I really wanted to emphasize

how bad of an event it was.

Yeah.

I do like this Wednesday show.

Hank recaps the weekend.

My other hot seat.

I don't know if it's Shams or Giannis.

They're in a back and forth.

Shams keep saying that it's not set in stone that Giannis is coming back, even though Giannis has made it very clear that he's coming back time and time again that they would have to kick him out.

He's not going to leave.

He's sub-tweeting Shams, being like, anyone miss Woge?

I like that.

I like that a lot.

That's good.

But Shams reported again that it's not set in stone, and he could be leaving.

At this point, if Giannis

just stays in Milwaukee for his entire career, he retires a buck.

He is a one jersey guy.

Will he be the most hypothetically traded player of all time?

Absolutely.

Already he might be.

It's crazy.

I can't think of anybody that would even rival him.

I feel bad for Bucks fan just having to deal with this all the time.

It doesn't feel like it's gotten ever really close.

This would be the closest we've ever been, but Giannis is out there saying,

I'm not leaving.

Yeah, it was Dame Lilig.

I think he was the number one hypothetically traded guy until he did go to Milwaukee.

But yes, it's definitely Giannis.

Let Milwaukee enjoy Giannis.

Yeah, it's crazy.

So he's sub-tweeting Shams.

I like that.

Sub-tweeting Shams.

I feel like Shams is not someone who would appreciate that.

He's probably silently kind of.

That's why he's tripling down.

Yeah.

He refuses to give it up.

Yeah.

Giannis, okay.

It's not sub-tweeting, it's gyro tweeting when it's Giannis.

A cool throne is dildo throwing in the WNBA.

Oh, yeah.

No, I'm just kidding.

I mean,

could have.

I actually had that on my hot team because there's an update about

dildo game.

Yeah, well, there's an update about the Speedway Classic.

What was an update?

It was a disaster.

It was, yeah.

Even more of a disaster.

The more things come out, the more you think what a terrible event it was.

Oh, you're a funny guy, Hank.

They should have had an actual NASCAR race going on during the baseball game.

That would have been awesome.

I was talking to Quiggs about this.

He said that NASCAR is trying to implement an electric race so it wouldn't be so loud so that they could do that while they were doing the baseball.

I don't know how it's

the electric race.

Next thing you know, we've got electric

electric power washers.

It would be impossible to do like the normal race.

It's so fucking loud.

This is one of my ideas for Arlington Heights and the Bears because it used to be a horse track.

They should build the stadium and then a horse track around the stadium and all the seats, it's glass, and all the seats are swivel, so you can just watch the game, commercial, turn around, watch the race.

Yeah, I like that.

I like the idea of

a dual-use stadium being used for two sports at the same time.

Like, a football game's not enough for you.

Well, we got a horse race going on every time there's a break in the action.

Because literally, just the ADD stadium.

Whatever the next generation is, what is it, Generation Beta?

Yeah, the betas are here.

Yeah, the betas are here.

Their

must missed beta.

Their attention span is going to be so low that they're going to need probably three sports going on at once.

Yeah.

So let's get some dual sport sports going on.

That'd be sick.

It'd be so sick if they were just, yeah, they're like, hey, here's a commercial break and here's a race and you just turn around, boom.

You can bet on it.

Just everything.

Figure it out.

It'd be awesome.

Good hot seat, Hank.

Thanks.

Yeah.

A couple hot seats.

Extra work.

My cool throne is: I have a couple of these two.

Marsh Madness.

Okay, yeah.

NCAA voted not to expand the tournament.

Thank you.

Safe for now.

Yep.

It's coming.

Don't expand it.

Yeah.

This is the truth.

It is.

I agree with him.

They put this out there being like, hey, we're not going to do it.

Knowing that now it's they moved the Overton window.

Yeah.

Now we're talking about the expansion, and next year they're probably going to let it in.

It's not a ridiculous idea anymore because they've gone all the way to a vote.

Yeah, like the tush push.

They'll probably ban that next year.

Right, exactly.

That's how they work these things.

Or like the commercials they're going to put on Red Zone on ESPN.

Yeah.

That's going to happen.

Okay.

Then Then my other cool throne is

Mike Francesa slash the Giants, Giants and Giants.

Although, kind of, I don't know.

The original clip, it's a Mike Francesa old radio clip, but he was on WFAN.

Can we play it?

Yeah.

Find it.

It's so funny.

It's so funny.

The guy calls in.

He's like, hey, you ever think the, you know, since the San Francisco Giants used to be the New York Giants, when they're ever in town, they do like a lunch or something?

And Francesa hated the call, was disgusted by the call.

Dan and Woolwick, what's up, Dan?

Hey, Mike.

I just got

a question about the Giants.

In your years of experience, have you ever seen

how the San Francisco Giants were once the New York Giants, has there ever been either a franchise-to-franchise or maybe even player-to-player get-together when San Francisco comes to New York?

Like, do they ever say hi, maybe

I don't know, go out to dinner or something?

I don't know what you're talking about.

Is there ever any interaction when the San Francisco Giants come to New York or vice versa?

The San Francisco Giants come to New York and do what?

Have a game.

They play against the Mets.

And what do you want to happen now?

Did the New York Giants ever reach out to them, either the players or the franchises?

The Football Giants?

Yeah, the Football Giants.

Well, what is the connection between the San Francisco Giants and the Football Giants?

Well, they used to be in New York and they got the same name.

But they have n the

they have nothing to do with each other, though.

There There's no connection.

They have different ownership.

There's no connection between the two teams.

I mean, there's no connection in any way between the two teams.

They have no relationship.

Do you think because they're giants, they're like brothers or something?

That might be the weirdest question I got in a long time.

I mean, that might

and I think that's an honest question.

That might be the strangest question I got in a really long time.

Yeah, as a matter of fact, they have the giant picnic.

They hold it over in Totowa, I think it is.

And then they have the

giant relay race and the giant raffle.

And then they all get together for the giant breakfast the next morning, and then they go their separate ways.

It is true.

It's a July weekend every year when it happens.

Yeah, and then the Rangers in Texas and the New York Rangers have the same thing.

They meet usually in Abilene and have that in August every year.

Lundquist is particularly close to Eudarvish.

As a matter of fact, there's a kinship there between the two of them.

And they did an actual Giants San Francisco Eli Manning players from the San Francisco Giants meetup.

What was the caller's name?

Do you remember?

Someone in Warwick.

Because I saw he came back on.

The WFN had him on yesterday, and I guess he was not funny and not with it, which is crazy.

So, all right.

This is one of those videos.

It's one of those things that's funnier when Francesco is not.

Now that he's in on the joke, it's a lot less funny.

I agree.

and I like

Francesco but I think he's uh he's obviously a titan of sports talk and he seems like a good dude never met him but I know he's been in the Barcelona New York office a bunch seems like great guy but it is funnier when he's like oblivious to the callers trolling yeah that was the beauty of his show I liked it I thought it was hilarious uh the only critique I had is it's it was a promo for Eli's show I wish it was just like, they're just like, hey, let's make,

long are the days that they just make funny videos just to make funny videos.

Yeah.

So, but I thought it was hilarious.

And it's also a very funny, like, full circle.

10 years.

Francesa was the best.

They got to do something with Spider-Man.

I was listening back to, yeah, I was listening back to the call of the guy who just kept on calling him Michael.

He got so upset.

I like the

Michael.

Stop saying Michael.

The Rombe one is the funniest one of them.

A gorilla?

Okay.

Gorilla.

Let's play that one.

Yeah.

A gorilla within the cave cave with a gorilla

and then uh or the guy who's it was it was deiz's tweet right that was like this guy this guy dropped a hard r on gorilla yeah i think this was like

mickey mano when he's talking about mickey mano winning the triple crown and the caller's just like how could he win the triple crown he's not a horse and he's like you waited four hours to say that

can you find the harambe is that not it

there was a gorilla

A Jason Giambi Mike Francesa meetup would go crazy.

Oh, yeah, that'd be good.

Do you have the gorilla?

I don't think this is it.

I also like the one where he just lists

Jacob DeGrom's run support.

Yeah.

And he just says numbers for

five minutes.

Zero, one,

two.

There it is.

Your child in there?

You're going to have people who are going to say, wait a second, I'm worried about the gorilla?

And your kid's in there basically maybe

seconds from having his head crushed.

We live in a world now where you are going to be more more concerned with the gorilla than you are the little boy.

What's wrong with you, people?

You think about me, he fell into an area where he's in there with a gorilla who is dragging him around that habitat.

And you're telling me you're worried about the gorilla's welfare?

It's great radio.

Shout out, Funhouse.

He was on.

What's wrong with you, people?

You could find the funniest fucking things.

Oh, man.

Good job, Hank.

Nice job.

Great riffin.

Great.

Awesome.

Awesome cool thrones.

It's great to have you back.

Practical.

Yeah.

Great work.

You back from Sunday.

Hardest working man in showbase.

That's what we do here.

All, you know, bits and shticks and jokes.

Do you know when

you're putting up like a Tony Snell?

Yes.

Okay.

I didn't know.

I didn't know if you walked away on Sunday's episode being like, nailed it.

I'm like,

I'm awake.

The moment I had it was when I said

someone needs to throw a pocket pussy on NBA, and I go, hey, Cossack, here.

You go, no, that was a pocket pussy.

I was like, we don't got him.

Yeah.

There's nothing going on here.

Physically.

Mentally, where were you?

Rufus to soul still.

Yeah.

You essentially were like in a coma, and we went to see you last right.

That wasn't my worst.

That was like,

but it was, it was definitely snell.

It was, it was snail stabs.

Snell stabs.

There's really no difference between

Monday after a big show.

No, it's Sunday.

It's, it's, and this is a problem, and this is, you know,

summer's coming to an end

because I don't really do it in the regular season.

I'm old now.

And Saturday is like Saturday.

The regular season.

I double dose of Rufus to Soul.

I like that.

Like Saturday, going out on a Saturday.

This is awesome.

I can no longer do it.

I'll be hungover Monday.

I've been having two-day hangovers this summer.

Yeah.

But it is summer.

And it was the perfect.

Last weekend was the perfect Chicago

events going on, weather,

just everything.

You went to a Rufus to Soul concert, and then you went to another Rufus to Soul concert.

You chased it with a Rufus to Soul concert?

I was soling it up.

That's a tough Saturday for any you.

Yeah, was that at Lala?

It was at Lala and then at a club at Rainbow.

He did the after show.

You just followed Rufus to Soul?

Yeah, I met him.

I met Dew of Rufus to Soul.

I might do that during Riot Fest this year.

Riot Fest looks awesome.

Shout out to John.

They want to come on.

Great guys.

All right.

Love it.

Okay, PFT, your hot seat.

I can't follow.

I can't follow.

It's tough to follow.

Speaking of zoos and deaths and zoos, my first hot seat is a zoo in Denmark.

There's a zoo in Denmark that's running low on food for some of their animals.

So they're asking people at home, if you have any pets that you're looking to get rid of, bring them in.

And we can euthanize them and feed them to our animals.

So

it says, fuck.

If you have a healthy animal that has to leave here for various reasons, that you have to leave here.

Healthy?

Yeah.

Because you can't feed like a disease.

Yeah, but like, oh, let me sacrifice my healthy animal.

Yeah.

Feel free to donate it to us.

The animals are gently euthanized by training staff and are afterwards used as fodder.

That way, nothing goes to waste, and we ensure natural behavior, nutrition, and well-being for predators.

The zoo says it accepts donated rabbits, guinea pigs, and chickens.

That's what I was going to say.

Yeah, on weekdays between 10 a.m.

and there's a death drop-off zone that you have to hit between 10 a.m.

and 1 p.m., but no more than four at a time.

Our brains immediately went to dogs and cats.

Dogs and cats, yeah.

And that's not what the case is.

That's obviously, but yeah, that's still fucked up.

But if you have a rabbit, do they accept turtles' memes?

How is Mr.

Perry?

Give us an update on Mr.

Perry.

Haven't heard from Mr.

Perry in a while.

I got a turtle that hibernates.

So he doesn't pick games?

He's going to.

We're going to make him pick games.

Should we.

I don't want to put more work on your schedule, but should we get a rabbit?

Also pick games?

If you don't like it, we can take it to the turtle.

We can threw a tortoise and a hare on every game would be interesting.

He can handle a rabbit?

I think rabbits are much, much more difficult to keep alive.

Maybe another turtle so that Mr.

Pear can chill.

That turtle can pick games.

Yeah.

And a rabbit.

We need something out of our animals.

So I don't know if it's getting a rabbit, waking Mr.

Pear up, maybe getting Mr.

Pear on some TRT.

I don't know.

We got to do it.

Mr.

Pear is going to pick every single football game this fall.

Mr.

Perry is a chick, too.

I just remembered that fact.

So does Mr.

Pear have a better record on certain games, like Thursday night, Sunday night, Monday night?

I think Thursday night.

He went 500 for March Madness.

Can we sort the data, though, on

the cool?

Flipping a coin.

Can you do that?

Can we sort the data on what night of the week he was best on?

Yeah.

Because he's telling us.

He's telling us where his sweet spot is.

We need some picks.

Okay.

And you might have to get a rabbit.

The rabbit, there's no, we can't get a rabbit.

Why?

Keeping a rabbit alive and healthy requires significant time, effort, commitment, similar to owning a dog or a cat.

Reading or it's not easy.

Okay.

We can't do that to this rabbit.

Why does it just go with Billy?

What if we get a turtle and call it rabbit?

Another turtle and call it rabbit.

Okay.

That's...

Get a lobster.

Does Mr.

Pear need a friend?

Mr.

Pear could use probably.

I feel like another tortoise.

What if we just got a rabbit

and let the rabbit live inside Vanny Woodhead?

That's the rabbit house.

That rabbit would die so quickly.

Probably get out.

Oh, my God.

Memes, you definitely get.

You can send that.

Memes just sent a face swap.

Nope.

Nope.

Nope.

Nope.

Nope.

You can't do that, memes.

Nope.

Across the line.

Memes, that's like day.

That's day one, memes stuff right there.

All right, sweet.

Denmark's fucked up.

We need a rabbit.

Yep.

Okay.

That's what we got.

A turtle named rabbit.

A turtle named rabbit.

Any animal named rabbit.

Does anybody that work here that works here have a rabbit already?

Somebody's got to have a rabbit.

Like for the kids.

Cindy Wells probably has a couple rabbits.

Cindy Wells probably does have a rabbit.

Oh, Brandon brought a rabbit on his face.

Oh, yeah, like a month and a half ago.

He has a rabbit.

Brandon does?

Yeah.

We should just use his rabbit.

But he lives in Wisconsin.

Yeah, but he could film it at his house.

He could, but I want to see the turtle.

I want to see the rabbit at Brandon's house, film the videos.

Yes.

And then, all right.

Or what if, yeah, memes could do that.

What if that was our college football?

Oh.

For Brandon.

But Brandon does have a sneaky zoo going on.

Yeah.

He's got a rabbit.

He's got two birds.

He's got some gerbils.

Just basically anything that we that is in a video for like a second here just goes to Brandon's house.

He's got that one that one fish in his lake?

Yep.

Yep.

Yep.

Well, actually, he doesn't even catch it.

It's just on a leash.

Yeah.

I feel like when you're country, you won't even consider that having animals.

You're like, yeah, I only have a rabbit, two gerbils, and you know, a dog.

Like, I don't really have animals.

I do have a ton of rabbits that live right outside my house.

Yeah, no, the street rabbits are real.

I'm always scared that a street rabbit's going to run into my garage late at night because when you get into the alley, like they see the lights and they'll just run in front of your car, zigzagging.

Yeah.

And I'll open my garage door.

What do I do then?

I don't know.

Like, I then's your rabbit now.

I've come close a couple times.

That's you.

You have to keep that rabbit.

I think those rabbits are not.

I mean, they're babies.

Well, no, they just live in the alley.

They can't be like super clean.

They're fucking badass rabbits.

Like, the rabbits that I have outside my house will stare down Blake and not move.

Yeah.

Just be like, come, come get some, bro.

Well, and they survive like,

you know, Agent Orange

chemical warfare once a month when they nuke the alleys for the rats.

So those rabbits are legit.

Okay.

My other hot seat is the dildo thrower, the first dildo thrower who has been apprehended.

His name is Delbert, which is an A-plus name for a dildo thrower.

Awesome name.

So he got arrested on Saturday.

He was the one that threw the dildo during the Valkyries Atlanta Dream Game.

And he's 23 years old.

This guy, he faces charges of disorderly conduct, public indecency/slash indecent exposure, and criminal trespass.

So, they're throwing the book at him.

They're trying to make an example out of Delbert.

So, actually, Arian brought up a pretty good point yesterday.

We were saying that, like, it might be the WNBA that's engineered this.

Yeah.

He's like, this is actually a sign.

It's a bellwether that the WNBA is doing well, that you have fans that are throwing dildas.

That's like the more toxic your fan bases get, the healthier your sport as a whole becomes.

All this stuff.

Well, all the discourse, everything.

Yeah.

The hate.

That was my whole point with the Angel Reese

Caitlin Clark.

When people get upset about it and make it this crazy thing, it's like, this is good.

This is rivalry.

You wouldn't go out there and spend $39 or $40 on a neon green dildo and throw it onto a court if nobody was going to see it.

Correct.

It's a tree falling on the Ford situation.

My cool throne is death.

Cool throne, death.

Because Mike McDaniels in a press conference yesterday said that today's a great day because we're one day closer to death.

I saw that.

Do you you think things are going well with the Miami Dolphins right now?

Bad vibes.

Yeah, I don't.

Bad vibes.

What was his message behind it?

What was his reasoning?

Can we play the clip?

Yeah, bad vibes.

Bad, bad vibes.

We're going to do a preview with Kevin Clark in a minute, and I think we talked about that bad vibes.

I guess

if you're a Christian man, being one day closer to heaven is not a bad thing, right?

Yeah.

He's accepted it.

That's a bizarre way to phrase that, though.

Yeah, that doesn't say like confidence in your quarterback.

No,

like you're looking forward to, you'd rather be dead.

It's basically like, I'm looking forward to death.

Right.

Like, I have to go through practice today, but

you know, on the flip side, I might die sooner.

Zach Taylor, like Sean McDermott,

Andy Reid, they wake up and they're like, thank God I'm alive so I get to coach this guy again.

Yeah.

Okay, we'll play the clip.

You should stand corrected.

Good morning.

False.

Great morning.

Let's go.

Oh.

What makes this one break?

Because we're another day closer to death.

Oh.

So he actually is taking the

approach of he's ready to die.

Ready to die.

Not afraid to die.

Yeah.

That sounds like something.

Death would be better than

Miami Dolphins.

He didn't think about what he was going to say until one second before he said it.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And then he probably finished and was like, shh, I think maybe the last conversation he had was with Tyreek before he went out there.

And then that was the first question got from the reporters.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Okay.

My hot seat, and we are going to talk a little bit about this in a different way with Kevin Clark, but my hot seat is Brian Schottenheimer for the Dallas Cowboys because he has shown up to a press conference with a backwards visor.

Colin Coward is not happy.

He said he didn't get the memo on how head coaches are supposed to dress.

He bumped them down four wins.

They're a two-win team now in Cowards Analytics.

They're going to win more than two games.

But the backwards visor is concerning.

It's a bad look.

Yeah.

It's.

That's like I'm, I just got off the golf course and I'm hammered.

He, that's, yeah, that's also like he doesn't fully understand that he's the head coach yet.

He thinks it's maybe just like he's getting pranked.

Maybe, maybe he's trying to do like a distraction thing.

Maybe he's doing a little Phil Jackson, make the conversation about the coach instead of about the player.

Smart, I know what I'm going to do.

I'm going to wear a visor backwards.

I know that people are going to talk about it.

Yeah, the visor backwards doesn't like the backwards hat does play in certain circumstances.

I don't know if the backward visor has ever played.

It's a coordinator move.

Yeah.

Yeah, he's still stuck in coordinator.

My other hot seat is

myself and everyone in this room.

And maybe, maybe, maybe someone can explain it to me.

But did you guys see the

woman who was hired by ESPN, Katie Feeney?

Who did that?

So she used to work for the football team

for a while.

She was in charge of doing their choice.

Do you know her?

She's a lifestyle creator.

Yep.

But I saw this hire and I was like, I'm sure, you know, hopefully she has all the success in the world, but didn't know who she was at all.

I still

seen her videos with she did stuff for the commanders.

People are mad online.

I don't know.

In Penn State, I mean, getting mad about this is weird.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It's like she's going to probably do content that you, if you're mad about this, you probably will never see her content.

I think they're.

She has a work for football teams.

Right.

Like, she's been doing sports.

I was more like, shit, should I know who this is?

I don't know.

No.

No, she's been like kind of behind the scenes, but she, yeah, I guess she gets results.

Listen, if you can do social media and get numbers for Sam Howell's Washington Commanders, well, that's actually, yeah, yeah, that's true.

Then you're probably doing something right.

I saw a lot of people getting mad because they're upset that ESPN is going towards this type of content instead of their traditional intelligent content, such as having Shannon Sharp and Steve Day Smith scream at each other for four hours.

I don't think it's going to take away from that.

You're still going to get that at ESPN.

I do like the people who are like, bring back

traditional Sports Center.

Obviously, I love Traditional Sports Center.

It just, how would it work when you can get every single highlight instantly?

Bring back the world that that was in shit and watch the top 10 by scrolling Instagram.

You're right.

Like, when someone hits a home run, you see it within four seconds.

Kyle Schwarber at NLMBP, maybe.

Good point.

So many.

That's a good point, and it's directly related to this conversation.

Exactly.

It is crazy.

I wasn't surprised by it.

Like, she's been, you know, it's not that crazy of a hire.

It's more crazy to me that, you know, talking 10 years ago, 15 years ago, that ESPN has shifted towards us.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah.

And not the opposite.

Like, that is just crazy when you think about, you know, 10 years ago.

Where we are, yeah.

Look at Barstool.

Look at ESPN.

In 10 years, ESPN is going to be doing moves that Barstool would do in hiring people in that world and not traditional sports.

Yeah.

Yeah.

No, it's a good point.

Because I, like I said, I was like, I don't, I don't care.

I'm happy for anyone to get a job in a very tough business, but I just didn't know who it was.

I was like, should I?

Did I miss this?

I did not.

I was not like super familiar, but I knew that she, I'd seen some of her stuff before.

Got it.

So, but I don't know what she's going to be doing.

Like, when ESPN puts out a press release saying, we're hiring somebody to do lifestyle content.

Yeah, they had to have known that press release was going to, like, having

Shetra tweet that out was crazy.

Lifestyle.

That's also why.

People are waiting for like trade deadline and like NFL news, and it's like, what?

That's also the funny part of it to me because my reaction reaction was, I don't know who this is.

I'm not going to get upset about someone I don't know who it is.

Whereas a lot of people are like, I don't know who this is and now I'm upset.

Like, what?

You have no idea.

She could have great content.

You have no fucking idea.

We'll see.

And the internet's free.

And the internet's free.

Don't follow.

Don't like it.

Don't watch it.

Don't go on TikTok.

My cool throne is college football fans because we have our first coaches poll out now.

Yep.

And that's great because people can talk about how they've been left out, where they might be.

We have Texas one, Ohio State two.

That will be week one in Columbus.

Penn State three, Georgia, four, Notre Dame, five, stack top 25.

Illinois, 12, by the way.

Arizona State, 11.

Those are some notable ones.

A lot of great logos on that top 25 right there.

Yeah, SMU, Kansas State, Indiana, 19.

LSU, make or break year for Kelly.

I'm excited.

I'm very excited for college football.

People are saying JMU might be in the college football playoff this year.

There There you go.

All right, and then also my cool throne is our former colleague Mantis because he finally completed his 100 free throws in a row, which was an insane.

So Mantis did this stream.

He's done it before a couple of years ago.

He didn't finish it.

He didn't complete it.

This was the first time he actually did it.

That he actually completed it.

So

the rule was he has to hit the 100th free throw blindfolded.

The 100 free throws aside, he shot 6,000 free throws.

He was shooting 95% from the line.

Yeah, it's crazy.

It's insane.

One of the best moments was when we brought him in as a ringer for our free throw stream, and Pat Bev was there and just like, what's going on right now?

Yeah, and he's just wet.

What up, Twin?

Zach, you got some hot seat cool thrones?

I do, yes, sir.

My hot seat today is the River City Mall in San Antonio, Texas.

There was an injustice served.

Duke Guinness was arrested unrightfully.

Who's that?

A gentleman on the internet.

AMP.

AMP, any means possible.

You guys familiar?

No.

uh, yeah, internet collective.

I am, but Hank, Hank's not, so you should explain who he is.

I can do that.

Uh, Duke Dennis would be what I would say, one of uh professional cool guy, if we're gonna go in layman's terms, also fantastic streamer.

Okay, there it is.

I was trying, but there was an injustice service.

He was trying to play hide-and-seek with the boys out at the mall, and he was arrested for playing hide-and-seek with the boy.

For playing hide-and-seek?

Yes, he may have like there's conflicting reports that maybe he tried to flee arrest, but I chopped that up to him being like in hide and seek mode still.

Like, I don't think he was trying to evade police.

He thought it might be like some stream snipers dressed up as the cops.

He was just in that mode.

Yeah.

And I just think it was an injustice.

Can we?

I'm going to throw out an idea.

I would love to do it.

Maybe next year, Grit Week.

I would love to do the

ever see those trainings where you have to hide from like SWAT team or the police and they like use real humans for trainings.

No.

Imagine us doing that.

It'd be so sad.

Like practicing hiding from a SWAT team?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Like a certain amount of time to hide.

We're going to do for the office.

What we're going to do.

We had one of our security guards was like a copper or

a higher cop.

We were going to get SWAT to come in for and they were going to do a training.

No, they were going to do a training.

And we were like, we should, like, you know, they were asking us if we were cool with it.

I mean, McCarthy, yeah.

And they were like, can we just not tell people in our office?

He's like, no.

And they're like, yeah, you can't do that.

We were like, it would be so funny to actually.

We said, can you not tell?

Yeah, we want that idea of the footage.

Yeah, yeah, people freaking out just to just to see what the simulation happens, but yeah, they were like, absolutely not.

But it would have been, it would have been very funny, very funny.

All right, so yeah, I want to play hide and seek professionally as a show.

Was he just

being really good at hide and seek?

Is he like an excellent hide and seek player?

A big guy, got some height on him.

I don't know if he's picking the best spots, but you got to be at least putting it all on the line to get arrested playing hide and seek.

Yeah, so he was

just going all out there.

I like to play hide and seek.

Was he hiding too good and they thought it was a missing person, and then they found him?

I would have loved that.

I don't think that is the case.

I think they tried to spin it into a disturbance situation, but

you can't get too rowdy playing hide-and-seek.

You're trying to be quiet.

You're trying to be coy.

Do you guys?

How do you guys think you would fare in like a bounty hunter hide-and-seek situation?

I think I'd be pretty good at it.

I want to say I'd be good.

I feel like I would go in with a great plan, being like, holy shit, they'll never get me.

I think I would get caught.

Yeah, I think it

depends on the setting.

It's like tennis.

Like, if it's in a mall or if it's like outside outside in the woods,

it would depend on the setting, I think.

Like tennis.

Yeah.

Are you right?

Well, yeah, like clay, grass.

Yeah, no, you're not.

You can play good on clay.

You can't, you know, some people can't play good on grass.

Zach, are you saying like in an actual

bounty hunters trying to find you somewhere in the country situation or just in hide and seek in general?

No, yeah, just a bounty hunter leading the hide and seek, not in like a Euro-wanted man situation, but I kind of like that too.

Yeah.

Should we just like, so you're saying commit crimes and then see who can go on the run the longest?

You don't have to commit the crime.

You can do like simulate committing a crime and then simulate the bounty hunt.

We're recognizable.

Yeah, but the beauty of having long hair is

in other countries.

You can transform.

How are you going to get to the other country?

I don't know.

I just watched Batman Begins last night and he just

honestly,

when he just decides to leave, he just starts running.

It's very funny.

Yeah.

What if I just, you know, just start running and never turn back?

What do you say, Max?

How do you transform?

Cut the hair.

Maybe, maybe cut it real short.

I think people should know it's you.

If you're going to cut it, you've got a fake beard, you'd be unrecognizable.

Unrecognizable.

Jacked up.

I get strong.

I would wear shoes with like six-inch lifts.

And I could shave my beard.

If you shaved your face, no one would know who you are.

Yeah, I shaved my face and grew out my hair.

These are things that take a long time.

That's actually true, though.

If I were to shave my face and cut my hair, you guys would have no idea.

Yeah, but you'd be arrested just based on your look.

People would be like, I don't know what that guy's up to.

Why is he talking with his hands?

He must be Italian.

Put him in prison.

Yeah, we should try to figure out a way to do it.

I'd like to do it be a fun video yes sir i'll try to find some bounty hunters all right and then your cool turn uh my cool turn today uh voted on by roughly 1100 of his peers baker mayfield has made it to the number 50 spot on the nfl top 100 list let's go after not being on the list so math tells me next year he's number one yeah that's true yeah

if he keeps improving I believe so.

Are we worried about his hand?

Hand contusion, but he's back at practice today.

Okay.

He's a dog.

Who'd you sign?

I know that we

took Teddy Bridgewater out for a workout.

Oh, Taylor Bridgewater.

Tyrod Bridgewater.

And then also, honorable mention there, top 10 quarterback in Madden as well for Baker.

So a little bit of a great list week for him.

Okay, that is good.

Who are the top 10 quarterbacks in Madden?

So the top 10 quarterbacks in Madden are number one spot, Josh Allen, number two, Lamar Jackson, Joe Burrow, Patrick Mahomes, Matthew Stafford, Jared Goff, Jalen Hurts, Justin Herbert, Baker Mayfield, and then Jaden Daniels rounds it off at 10.

Okay.

Okay.

A little different than Max.

Noted.

Noted.

Do I owe myself?

No, this one is according to coaches, executives, and stuff.

No, he's got to get traded.

Did that what?

Oh, you're talking about Jaden?

Yeah.

I think you just gave it to him, didn't you?

Did I actually give him my car?

Yeah.

How did that clip turn out?

Because I thought when I walked away from it, I thought maybe I don't owe him my car.

No, I think you do.

Well, but you also

could owe Max your car.

Are we doing that?

We may need to buy another LGBTQ.

Do you want to talk about it or do we not not want to jinx it?

What?

PFT said something very scary to me this morning.

What did he say?

It's his preemptive hot seat, yes.

We should talk about it.

All right, so Hank is doing a great job being CEO of golf operations for PFT Enterprises.

He's been all on me, begging me to stop working and to start playing more golf, which is his friend.

It's a week away, yeah.

Week away.

So we're going to go out.

We're grinding today.

I'm going to grind all week on the course.

We're going to make a trip to Harborside Golf Course this afternoon.

Yep, shout out to Harborside.

It's about 30 minutes away, would you say?

Maybe an hour and 30 minutes.

30 minutes, no traffic.

Highway driving.

I forgot that I was going to have to go on the highway when I left to come into work this morning.

So I brought the El Camino in.

It's going to be a test.

It's going to be, I put it 65% chance I get there.

65% goes with me.

Why don't you go with Hank?

I kind of want to embrace the

Shane's going to have to go.

It's a quest.

Shane's going to have to go.

I'll drive behind you.

It's a quest.

I'll drive behind you.

I might have to stop for gas twice on the way to get there.

Yeah.

Listen, if it breaks down on the way, I will call a tow truck and I will have them just pick it up and drive it to Ashburn, Virginia.

And leave it with a note on it being like, here's your car, Jaden.

Have fun.

Oh, man.

That's nerve-wracking.

Yeah, we'll see.

That's exciting.

I know.

I'm actually pumped about it.

That was your cool throne, right?

Yes, sir.

Okay.

All right.

Good hot seat cool throne, boys.

That was great.

Great hot hires.

Hank's so back.

We're firing.

So back.

All right.

We're going to do our Mount Rushmore before we do that.

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Okay.

Mount Rushmore time.

Mount Rushmore of skills we wish we learned

when we were younger.

Skills we wish we learned when we were younger.

Do we need to talk at all about Queen Latifah?

Queen Latifah is a great pick.

I don't know if that was a great pick.

Racism is alive and well.

Okay, you're going to go that card.

Wow.

Okay.

No, Queen Latifah is a great pick.

Great.

It's a funny pick.

A great pick?

I felt like.

Because you loved her work in

barbershop.

Okay.

Nailed it.

Okay.

It was a very...

The closest Mount Rushmore of the season

is what, like 0.3%

separated first from second?

Yes.

Quad box was the right pick.

Quest

was the fun pick.

And Big Cat got in my head.

He was like, just be fun.

And Quests are fun.

But if I was thinking in a bubble vacuum, Quad Box was the smarter pick.

That's right.

If we switched Quavo with Quad Box, we would have won easily.

Yeah.

Yeah.

But you also didn't have Quad Box on your list.

You absolutely had.

Oh, you did?

I thought you had to.

I didn't pick it up first, potentially.

That was between Quad Box and Quests at the end.

Yeah.

That's what PFD was like, yeah, I like the two choices.

But you got to go with what you like.

Yeah, no, I know.

I know.

Camp pan.

Quests are fun.

Quests are fun.

But, yeah, whatever.

10 years from now, people are going to look back at that pick, underappreciated at the moment.

It's going to be like Tom Brady.

Yep.

Six-round pick.

Hell yeah.

Greatest of all time.

All right.

So,

who's up first?

We are up first.

Okay.

And I believe Big Cat and Zach took the lead in Rushmore.

Okay, but it's all within like one point.

Yep, one, one, one.

Okay.

We're down two, down one.

Down two from first, one from second.

Skills you wish you learned when you were younger.

Correct.

Yes.

Okay.

We have the 1-1.

Yes.

We are going to go with money management.

Okay.

Good pick.

Still don't know how to do it.

Put in your mattress.

I assume this is...

Okay, yeah.

Yeah.

I yield EPTAs.

It's hard.

You don't know what that means.

Nope.

Wouldn't it be nice

if you knew that at a young age?

If you start a Ponzi scheme, that's great money management.

Not if you join one, but if you start one.

Yeah, yeah.

And this is definitely me, just bad learner.

But, like, I don't think learning money management when I was young and had no money, I don't know how much that would have helped me.

It would have helped.

If that makes sense.

Yeah, it would have probably helped.

Just get a bunch of mayonnaise jars.

Because it's everything.

It's like budgeting your money.

It's like, it's not just financing your money.

But then I kind of take the Mike McDaniels method of thinking.

We're one day closer to death.

So whoops.

Just let it rip.

Yeah, let it rip.

But you also still don't know.

So, like, now that Bitcoin.

Max, can you break down what you said by it's not budgeting, it's financing?

I said it, I said it is budgeting.

Like, money management.

I looked up what money management.

I had to look up what money management means.

And it's, and it's, oh, we're that far away.

We're that far away.

It's all of the encompassing.

Which gives me a lot of money.

Which one budgeting is?

It's really unclear what it means.

Which part is it?

Was it the money or the man?

I think it's probably the management part.

I think you know what money means.

I know what money means.

It's a management management part.

Do you know what a baseball manager does?

What's confusing about it?

It's the process of planning, direct...

Wait,

planning, directing, and controlling financial activities such as budgeting, saving, investing, and spending.

I wish I knew

it.

Yeah.

Do you know what?

Do you know what I mean?

I wish I knew it better.

I know what it is.

I wish I was...

I had a better skill of it.

When you break down your budget, what do you spend too much money on?

Food.

Yeah, Yeah,

food and drink.

Budgeting off vibes is always a bad thing, you get in a bad spot.

Yeah.

There are like things out there where you can go back and see

your budget, and that's bad.

Yeah.

That's bad when you see that.

Yeah.

Do we think if you learn to budget too early, you're like boxing yourself out on, like, if you're learning to save money too early, you're missing life experiences on the stupid things you would have done with your money.

You are.

Yeah.

It can be the smart thing to do, but it's not always the funnest thing to do.

Sometimes not having money makes you want money that much more.

Oh,

you're on your Gary Vee shit right now.

Go off, King.

I mean, it's...

I don't know how much.

Wait,

start the TikTok clip right now.

Go.

Well said.

Everyone.

Oh, no.

This is going to get cut.

It's probably going to have to get cut.

Oh, no.

When you're gambling and you get down

and you lose a lot of money, it makes you want to get money back that much more.

Whereas if you save it, if you save it and you're responsible, then maybe you're not as hungry.

Yeah.

Every morning I wake up, I light $1,000 on fire just to make myself go out and earn it.

That's what you have to do to be successful.

Yeah.

You got to feel the pain.

Yeah.

And then it just feels that much better when you rise up.

Every morning I wake up and I suffocate a small animal watching their last dying breath.

That makes me say, hey, you know what?

You do have to post more on Instagram today.

I walk my dog to the zoo and say goodbye.

All right.

Good pick.

But it's very funny that you don't know what you have to Google money management.

That's exactly right.

That's exactly where I'm at.

Yeah.

Okay.

That's basically for you.

Okay.

That's us?

Yeah.

All right, Hank.

I'm going to take.

All you.

You got it.

All right.

I got this.

Big time.

1-1 for us.

I'm going to go with fixing cars.

We had it.

Knowing what to do, how to fix a car, not just for my personal...

This could also be foreshadowing for my my drive later on today, but it's something that like some people that grow up in families that fix cars, your dad teaches you how to fix a car, it becomes second nature to you.

You can figure out what's going wrong, the five things that you can like try to manage on it.

I never learned any of that stuff.

I learned how to fix a like flat tire, and that's pretty much it.

Yeah.

And jumpstart a car.

Yeah.

Okay, that's a good pick.

Ours is similar, but a little just not car specific.

I think we should go with our first pick's going to be basic handyman work.

Yep, we have that on the list.

I really wish I was

good with my hands and just being able to do shit.

Man's man.

Man's man.

Never learned it.

Now what do we do?

One?

I like one.

Yeah, one is a great pick.

I feel strongly about one.

One or 13, I'm in for both.

And I actually think Hanks can agree with this.

Fuck.

I wish I learned how to golf when I was a kid.

Yeah, when I was on the list.

I see someone with the golf swing from when they were a kid, and it's like they have the basic tools that they never, they're just always consistent.

I did not play golf as a child, I did not play golf until I was in my like 20s.

God damn it, do I wish I'd had a golf swing since I was like five years old?

It would be nice.

I did a golf camp one summer when I was, you know, kid,

and I like played well and left the camp and was like, Mom, golf is so boring.

I want to play baseball.

Like, I never, I'm good with golf.

And then now it's all I I do, and it's like I that's all you think about, yeah, yeah.

And imagine it because you know what I'm saying.

When you see someone who's like, I've been playing since I was a kid, they have they just have a flow to them where it's like they trust their swing because they learned it at such a young age.

And people that if they were, if you were ever able to score, like, let's say you were ever able to shoot in the 70s or ever shoot in the 80s, even if you don't play a lot, like I'll play with the guys like, yeah, I've only played a couple times this year, but they played when they were younger.

They can go out and shoot in the 80s, they can go out and shoot in the 70s.

Like, if you've ever been able to shoot a low score,

even if you're not, like, in form, you can

kind of get back there.

Whereas, like, if you're trying to get down,

it's just a war.

And here's a message for everyone out there.

Guess what?

Riding a bike overrated when you become adult.

Whoa.

Golf is way more useful.

Facts.

Like,

I would trade being able to ride a bike for being able to golf well instantly.

Obviously, riding a bike as a kid is very fun, but from age,

what, 16 for the rest of your life, being able to golf better than riding a bike would be awesome.

Did you know there's a coworker that we have here that has never ridden a bike?

Oh, man.

I do.

Who is it?

Do you know who it is?

I don't off the top of my head.

Someone people would know.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah, I do.

I do.

I do.

Quigs.

Quigs.

Oh,

never rode a bike.

He probably doesn't think bikes are real.

Like, he's got some.

He said he just never learned as a kid, and he was like, he got to, he got to an age where it's like, you can't learn to ride a bike as.

No, he needs to just go.

He needs needs to like have someone close to him go teach him in a parking lot.

Like we were, we were going somewhere this weekend and I was like, oh yeah, it's a quick bike ride.

And then like as I was saying it, I was like, you don't know how to ride a bike, so we'll take it to Uber.

Zach, how do you feel on a bike?

I feel good on a regular bicycle.

Okay, all right.

Because I was going to say the motorcycle.

You're on a motorcycle.

Yeah.

Okay.

You guys had that as one of your picks?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yep, we did.

All right, so it's us again.

Yeah.

I'm going to go with the top of the list, Hank.

Love it.

Cooking.

Cooking.

Being able to cook really nice meals for yourself.

Max just said it.

I mean, it goes with his money management.

My budget, if I looked at it, which I don't, because I don't want to be depressed, is the amount of money I spend on food.

And when you buy groceries, you buy like $60 worth of groceries that last you a week.

Yeah.

Get one or two meals on Uber Eats or Postmeats, $60.

I've gotten cooking, being able to cook well.

Like, I can cook sometimes if I have to.

You think if you could cook well, you would actually cook?

Yes.

I don't.

The time thing is an issue.

Yeah.

I I have waves where

I get really into cooking, and then I run out of cookies.

I would meal prep.

If you could cook well, you wouldn't be sitting down and being like, I'm going to cook tonight.

Absolutely.

It becomes passionate.

It does, like after a long day, it's nice.

It can be relaxing.

It can put you in a better mood when you go home.

I agree with everything you're saying.

But it's tough to find the time for it.

No, you think Hank would go down and be like, hey, hey, guys, can we wrap up the show early?

I got a souffle I'm working on tonight.

I think

if he had a lady over, I think he might.

If I was good at cooking, I would want to cook more.

Obviously, it's like golf.

It's like anything.

If you're good at it, you're like, yeah, I want to do that.

I still think cooking, like, kind of like the dishes and all that stuff,

like, there's a part of cooking that just kind of sucks.

I like the cooking part.

Cooking saves so much money.

The cooking part of cooking is great.

Sometimes it's not even.

I feel like I look at it, sometimes you got to buy so much shit.

I like grilling.

Grilling is different.

I love grilling.

Grilling is different.

It's a different sport.

Yeah.

Totally different.

That's pen shit.

Good pick.

Thanks, Anne.

Pen shit.

All right.

You guys got two.

No, it is a good pick.

I just was more pushing back on you saying you would cook all the time if you knew how to cook well.

I don't think that's true.

In the summer.

That's grilling.

The offseason.

I do grill a lot.

Grilling is different.

Okay.

We are going to go with playing an instrument.

Good one.

Just, you know, I see PFT in here playing the guitar all the time.

Yeah.

And I just think about how cool it would be if I learned learned how to play the guitar.

And it's one of those things that everyone, like, as an adult, tries to do.

They're like, oh, I'm going to pick this up.

Can't do it.

You got to do it when you're a kid or else you're never going to do it.

Yeah, PFT gave me lessons for like three weeks, and I think I learned like four notes.

You need that age when you're like 12 to 15, where you don't really have that much else going on at your house, where you can just chill in your room and play guitar.

That's where you really learn.

What would you do?

Guitar or would you go?

Piano would be sick.

Yeah.

Those are the two things that you can, it's very cool to be at a house or party or show up somewhere and it's there.

And if you can sit down and play it, like, it's cool.

Like, when I was very young, I like, I did, like, the snare drum in my elementary school band.

And then I quickly realized when I got home, it's like, you can't play any.

There's no songs that you can play on a drum.

Right.

You just make noise.

So I was, I remember I would like go up to my mom and like be like, do you know this song?

And it was just like nothing.

It was just like sounds.

But yeah, no, guitar, piano, any instrument.

Good pick.

We had it.

Third pick?

We're going to go social skills.

Oh, okay, just in general.

I thought we agreed on something.

What social skills?

I thought we were going to go.

You said that one.

I know that was the funny pick, but.

Memes, similar to Max having to Google money management, have you at any time googled social skills?

I think it's just small talking shit.

Yeah,

right?

You're not much of a small talker.

Yeah, you're not a small talker.

You pointed that one and said, Picket.

I pointed at the first one.

Wait, what was the first one?

We're not going to say that.

You literally pointed that one and said, Pickett.

We agree that we could get that one in the last round.

But you could have gotten that one in the 20th round.

No, I think.

I'm talking to guys on a podcast.

Yeah.

I think that's a good pick.

Okay.

Hank?

PFT?

Zach, get ready.

There's a couple C's.

Zach, before they go, think 14, think

Hank, I'm going to go with one of the C's, and then I'm going to go with...

Well, we have only one, but I like whatever C you like.

10, 14, and 35.

Go ahead.

Okay.

I'm going to go coding.

Coding AI.

Coding AI.

Wait.

Is it coding or coding AI?

But how would you learn that younger?

The AI?

I guess coding.

Coding.

Coding.

Coding.

Like the Zuckerberg AI

thing is crazy.

Yeah.

Coding, though, in itself, I think, is going out.

Like, I think there was a story I read that computer coding is like...

Done.

Well, no, people are using AI to help them write code.

But still, if you know how to write code, you're pretty much going to have a job for the rest of your life.

I had a bunch of people that I was friends with that were in the computer sciences departments at some schools, and I was like, this sounds like the most boring shit ever.

And they hated every minute of learning how to do it, but they will never be unemployed.

Yeah.

Okay.

Zach, what are we thinking?

How do you feel about 14?

14, I like.

I think we get freaky with it.

I think we have 10.

I have fun with it.

I go

10 and 35.

Hold on, social skills.

Social skills is a funny one.

Well, I like 14, but hold on.

Like, the question is, so it would be appropriate for you to pick it.

I don't know if I could claim that I could have learned it when I was younger.

I also know that's something you learn social skills.

You do.

You can learn them.

Yeah.

You think you just have them?

I don't know.

Everyone's taught

memes talking shit in a muted mic back here to you, Hank.

I said 100%.

You definitely learn.

I was a quiet kid.

Meme, should we hire a social skills coach for you?

Good.

It would like hitch.

What if if we go 10 and 14?

Is would you 10 and 14?

Do you think 10 is the most extreme form of that?

Yeah, I think it's.

Listen, I wish I knew it.

I wish I learned it.

Yeah.

All right.

Go 14 first and then and then 10.

Okay, so we would like to take with our third pick how to buy Bitcoin.

It would have been really nice to learn that.

Oh, but we can't pick coding AI.

I mean, Bitcoin's been around for like 15 years.

How to buy Bitcoin?

When he was like eight years old.

This is

nine.

Yeah.

What?

This is investing.

All right, fine.

No, no, no, no.

How to buy Bitcoin.

Well, you picked money management, not investing.

Good point.

Investing is just a small part of money management, Matt.

If it's not fair because of the AI thing, that's fine.

We'll take it off.

No, you know what?

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

I can retract.

Yeah, you can retract.

Let's start from the top of this room.

You're telling us to.

That's on me.

How to buy Bitcoin.

All right, we have two funny ones that are probably not going to do well in the graphic if you want us to retract.

We'll go crazy ones.

No, I think you guys picked how to buy Bitcoin.

I think that's a fine pick.

I don't think that there's anything really terrible about that at all.

I think you're not being honest.

Yeah.

It's going to suck on the graphic.

No, I thought Max objected unfairly to it by saying that

that's not money management.

I would have been nice if someone taught you how to buy Bitcoin 15 years ago.

That is true.

That's really nice.

That's investing.

You didn't pick investing.

You picked money management management.

That is part of money management.

No, it's not.

Investing is having a lot of money.

That's like I just said how to manage.

Money invested.

Money management is having money and how to manage it.

That's the exact same thing of me just saying how to play an instrument and you saying how to play guitar.

No, that's not.

Yes.

No, that's different.

That's the same thing.

No.

No.

How is that different?

It is.

Also, buying Bitcoin is

you took...

learning how to play Freebird.

That means you imply you already know how to play guitar.

No.

Good point.

Good point.

You want to learn how to play Freebird.

You know how to play multiple examples.

You know how to play guitar

and you want to learn so much.

You're someone who wants to learn how to play guitar.

As the only member of Part of My Take who's kind of played the Freebird solo, Hank is 100% right.

There's a huge difference between wanting to learn how to play guitar and then wanting to learn how to play a song on guitar because you already know how to play guitar.

Also, Max, if I took coding,

you're like, oh, well, that makes you money.

So you're just taking money management too.

How to get a job.

Way.

How to get a job is the exact money management method.

And you're already managing it.

Also, buying Bitcoin is difficult.

I'm talking about.

Yes, it is.

go on Cash Addison.

I've already tried it.

You're going to go on Cash Addiction.

I've already got ETH's accounts just blowing you up, being like,

All right, our last pick is karate.

Okay, fighting.

Yeah.

I wish I fucking knew karate.

Dude, imagine if someone like came at you and you're just like, bro, you don't want this.

I'm a black belt since I was seven.

Yeah.

Karate.

Jiu-Jitsu would be cool, too.

Just fucking people up with your hands.

I wish I knew karate.

I really do.

You really like that?

Yeah, we can get a teacher.

No, because I wish I that's a that's kind of like the golf where it's like if you knew karate when you were young and like you like it's also like a guitar.

Everyone did karate at some point.

Yeah, it's like

no one did.

No one.

It's like I wish someone had said, hey, yellow belt.

Stick with.

Imagine if I was just walking around today and I was like a fucking plus two handicap and a black belt.

My life would be way better.

Yeah.

Way better.

Yeah, the idea of someone, it's the idea of like, you know, when you're in your 20s and like maybe someone stepping to you and you're just being like, buddy.

I know karate.

You don't want to do this.

I will, I will fucking kill you with three moves.

Don't step the big guy.

He knows karate.

He knows karate.

He's a black belt.

I like CC PFT.

Nope, we're not going to do that.

Okay.

Oh, come on.

We did karate.

No, no, this is more of a karate one.

Hank wants me to take a.

Oh, okay.

A boring one.

Yeah.

Let's get what?

Yeah, it's a boring one.

What?

Shut the fuck up, Hank.

Our final pick is going to be

What?

No.

What?

Say it.

No, it's not boring, but I'm excited for what you're going to pick.

Have fun.

Go for it, partner.

Throwing a knuckleball.

Ooh, I like that.

Throwing a knuckleball would be if you worked really fucking hard on it

and you just got to the bigs and you were able to pitch for like 25 years.

I like that.

And nobody could figure out how to hit it.

Yeah.

I like that.

Anybody, because it's one of those things where I, I know this is probably 100% wrong, but I think anybody that really dedicates themselves to throwing a knuckleball will make it to Major League Baseball.

Yeah, agreed.

That was one of my original, original, like, I don't even think.

Get rich quick schemes?

Yeah, I said this to Dave at one point when I was when I was like 20, and I was like, I feel like if you just lock, send me to a cabin with a coach for a year.

I could do it.

So it would be a knuckleball.

I could make it to the leagues.

And then by the time I was like 27, it was probably, I think I've talked about it on the show.

Yeah.

It reached an age, but there was like three or four years where I was like, if you guys want a content idea, I think it was before this show.

I was like, if you want a content idea, like just send me to the woods with a knuckleball coach, and I'll come back.

It was the idea before mini golf

long

before mini golf.

That was before, yeah, mini golf was after I got into golf.

Yeah, even if you didn't make it to the pros, just being able to toss a sick knuckleball when you're like hanging out with your friends would be awesome.

Make them look idiot, like idiots.

All right, last pick.

We're gonna go with,

yeah, we're gonna go with carpentry for our last pick.

I watch a lot of DIY stuff on TikTok.

Have you ever been to a basement where

there's a wood?

We just did the same thing.

I'm not going to argue.

Yeah, I mean,

fixing around the world.

Yes, I saw some carpentry is like, that's a

full-blown profession that you have to learn to pick a tree.

No, that's not.

Not at all.

Not at all.

I picked minor home repairs.

This is

the major of the repairs.

We could fix anything.

No, just wood.

No, actually, you can't fix it.

We can fix anything.

No, actually, you couldn't fix anything because it's just wood.

No, we could fix anything.

Carpentry is just wood.

If the water heater blows out, I can fix it.

You can't.

No, that's major repair.

You're minor.

No, no.

I said handyman work.

That's exactly what you call a handyman repair.

No, I said handyman work.

A water heater fix is the same.

Oh, yeah, my picture is handyman work.

Handyman work.

You didn't say.

No, we said minor home repairs in our list.

Oh, fuck.

That's where you got mixed up.

I was thinking, all right, cool, guys.

You guys can build us some stairs.

Awesome.

I'm not even saying that.

I'm saying like

building tables and shit.

They just took Jesus.

Yeah, they did.

Yeah, no.

Yeah.

All right.

Let's do honorable mentions.

I got some ones that were throwing.

Is counting cards boring?

No, we had it on the list.

I love that one.

We had it on our list.

PFT saying it was boring was crazy.

It's more boring than knuckleball.

That was, Zach had that one.

No, it's not.

It's illegal.

It's like you can get, like, you can get, you're not going to get thrown in jail or like thrown into the basement of a casino for throwing a knuckleball.

If you're really good at it, maybe.

What about

what?

Yeah, it's like fixing a a game.

How do you guys think magic would have played?

Bad.

Bad gives a fuck.

Yeah,

don't really care.

I wish someone had.

No, if you have like two or three magic tricks that you can always go to, that's kind of cool.

I would rather be a mentalist, learn mentalist.

Mentalists like that.

Yeah, that's cool.

What about how do you think the pick

the rules to intentional grounding?

I know those.

I wish I had learned it when I was younger, though, because there still are times where you're like, is it?

Is it not?

Even the refs don't know.

Also, infield fly.

Yep.

I love it when a softball ump calls infield fly.

He's like, I've trained my entire life for this moment.

Yeah.

What about just talking to chicks?

Social skills.

Yeah, it's one of the social skills, but like really being really good at picking up chicks.

Yeah.

Social skills.

Negging.

Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

We had public speaking, so I guess similar social skills.

Cook the perfect steak.

But Hank, you do

cooking.

No.

You would never do it.

What?

I would.

We all established that we grill all the time.

We do grill.

You said cook.

Yeah,

cook the perfect steak.

Big cat made a great steak when we had our steak off.

On the grill?

But I would on the pan.

Okay, sorry.

Make the perfect steak.

Okay.

We're an honorable mentions, dude.

Microsoft Excel?

Yeah.

That would be a good one to know.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I've said that I'm proficient on every resume that I've sent.

Never once have I approached proficiency.

I am so far from proficiency.

Yeah.

It's like the old like when Brian Scalabrini would be like, I'm closer to LeBron than you are to me.

Yeah.

Like I'm closer to

like a rabbit than I am to a proficient at Excel.

Yeah.

That's how far away we are.

One time I was working at a job and somebody sent me a Microsoft Excel spreadsheet and all I could think about was like, you are actually putting the entire business in jeopardy by even emailing me.

Yeah, because I'm going to fuck up a cell.

Yes.

What about dressing nice?

I kind of like that one.

I mean, I'm like an adult.

I pretty much got that already.

Just knowing.

No, you learned how to dress when you were seven and then you kept it.

Yeah.

It's a good listen.

Yeah,

once your parents stopped dressing you, it was, that was it.

Zach had spearfish.

Would be cool.

Yeah.

If we're ever on survivor or we're on an island, we're just dialed.

Hunting.

I think hunting and fishing in general.

Shooting a gun.

I thought

in practice, like

being a boat guy in in theory

would be great, but in practice, then you have to be the boat guy.

So that's why I kind of.

That's just a general, yeah, also like guy who knows everything.

Kind of like boat guys are boat guys, car guys.

Yeah, they kind of all are the

fishing, hunting.

It's all

tie a bow tie.

Probably only has happened like three times in my life.

Awesome.

But we had to do the YouTube video every time.

Did you figure it out with a YouTube video?

I think one of my friends figured it out and then tied all of our bow ties.

You got to have one guy on the crew that knows that.

I remember I literally tried for like two hours at a recent at a recent

wedding and then somebody had to like drive to the house that I was at to do it for me because I just couldn't figure it out.

What about being able to sing?

Learning how to sing.

I thought about that, but like what does that really help

at this point of your life?

It's like tone-deaf people will never learn that.

No, but it's like Junior Soprano.

When he just starts singing out of nowhere and people start crying, you're like, I had no idea this guy could sing.

That guy's also a little bit of a tryhard.

That's true.

It probably says something about us as a podcast that we didn't pick learning a new language.

Yep.

We had it on our list.

We were very incurious.

Who cares?

Who cares?

We had it on our list, and we're like,

what did we do?

I'd much rather be able to fucking do karate

than know Spanish.

Building a table would be fun.

Like, it's fun.

You guys are second-guessing your crypto.

I had to build a table as an omnibus.

As a Quaker guy, as part of my rite of passage into adulthood.

Yeah.

I bought a table at IKEA.

I assume.

go.

Built that shit.

Drive a stick shift.

Is that real?

Yeah.

That's like...

You have to build a table?

You have to build a sturdy table.

And you did it with Ikea?

I just got it.

I just bought a table.

That's smart.

Yeah.

I put it together.

Who is judging?

IKEA is tough.

Who are you building the table?

It's for yourself.

It's about yourself.

Do you guys see those DIY guys on TikTok who like build

overhangs over their patio and shit?

It's the coolest thing ever that a man could do.

Yeah.

That's when you're actually a real adult man.

Yeah.

Like, that shit is so sick.

Mm-hmm.

In a workshop.

Yeah.

Like,

going into, like,

a

dad basement and you just see a wood shop in there is so sick.

So sick.

We had calories.

Oh.

Okay.

Learned calories.

Yeah.

How credit cards work, kind of like your pick, Max.

Credit cards work would have been a good one.

I went on Weight Watchers in the sixth grade.

I didn't know if that was.

And credit cards all out.

Wait, what?

I went on Weight Watchers in the sixth grade, lost 30 pounds, but so I learned calories early.

Then you ignored them.

Correct.

Yeah, I mean, exercise.

In general, still, you know, I play, that doesn't help either.

What about whistling with your fingers?

Oh, yeah, yeah.

I wish I knew how to do that.

Put them in your mouth and then that's just a real like man thing to be able to do.

Give one of those.

Yeah, whatever.

Like the dogs running away?

Along the same lines as throwing a knuckleball, i had uh long snapping

just practicing long snapping yep i feel like you'd have a job for life yep zach what else did you have i think being able to dunk would be i would use that for the rest of my life yeah that's also you can learn that after yeah after you're young

no i got no shot yeah i know no you know we should try we should do a video series what about dancing dancing we had on our list Would be cool if you were like at least a decent dancer.

Especially with TikTok nowadays, it's true.

If you committed to dancing every day, you'd be

a lot better off.

I feel like an obscure Olympic sport would have been illusion.

Like something that

if you dedicated your life to as a child, you could be an Olympian.

Curling?

Yeah, like something like something like that.

I got one that, oh, do we say jumper cables?

I think I know how to do it.

That's an easy you.

That's an easy YouTube look.

Okay.

I think even with no phone, I would be able to jump a car.

Here's one that's going to maybe get some side looks, looks, but

just like

floss, the importance of floss.

Okay.

Still don't really

should probably floss more.

I know how to do it.

It doesn't mean I do it more.

Speaking of which, I got to fucking call the dentist.

Yeah, it's like the calories thing where it's like, I kind of wish they had really hammered that into my head that you got a floss.

Throw you in on me calling the dentist.

Yeah, just add my name.

My name to it.

Actually, add me too.

All right.

The dentist is bullshit.

I went last week.

I had no problems with my teeth.

Teeth.

They said I had a cavity.

They filled the cavity.

And now, two weeks later, my tooth hurts like shit.

Okay, so

the one that they filled.

I got to call a cat.

I got to call mom.

Have you ever been like that?

Have you been to the dentist since you've been in Chicago?

I was like,

I'm going Monday.

I have scheduled two dentist appointments, but I canceled both of them.

So that counts for something.

TMTV?

Let's go to the dentist.

No.

No, we need a Stoolee dentist.

I thought you were going to say the Dave Dentist guy.

Come in.

No, we need a Stoole dentist.

Let's get a Stoolee dentist.

Hit Hit us up.

You got to be in the city of Chicago.

I do need a dentist.

And you guys are going to be like, you don't want a Stoole dentist.

I had one in Brooklyn, and he was the man.

Because they don't just...

You still have to pass dental school.

So it's not like they're,

you know, idiots.

I'm cool with a Stoole dentist if he tells me my other dentist was a piece of shit for telling me I had a cavity.

Let's get a dentist.

Giving me a cavity.

Someone hit us up.

All the PMT boys will show up.

We're all going to get our teeth cleaned.

And like, like, it's probably 10 campies.

And learn floss.

Can I still get mine cleaned Monday?

Nope.

No, you got to go with us, bro.

Okay.

All right.

Goodmount Rushmore.

Any others?

Anyone have any others?

Yeah, was it for Split Wood we had there?

Chess.

Chess is a good one.

Chess would be cool if you.

Although I feel like I did learn chess when I was young, I just forgot it.

But that's also like something, too.

Like if you're really good at chess, like...

How much you're going to use it later in life because people won't want to play with you.

Right.

You know?

I learned how to do the four-move checkmate, and then I was like, that's all I need to know in chess.

I'm just going to run this play, and then if they stop me, I'm fucked.

Zach had driving through a roundabout, so that just tells me he does not know how to do that.

Yeah.

They're just not, they're regional.

You know, you run into them in different states, so you haven't encountered them before.

But they're all the same rules.

They're regional.

No, some places don't have, yeah.

They're big in Europe.

But they're the same rules.

So that would be like a left-sided roundabout, so then it would be opposite, too.

Yeah.

It depends on what country.

But yeah.

Who drives like us in Europe?

I think France.

Oh, fuck.

I think the only countries that drive on

the wrong side are England and Ireland

and maybe Australia.

Weirdos.

Yeah, Australia does.

You know that?

We drive on the lift.

You've been there?

I was a youth.

Oh, nice.

Hank asked me if you drive on the right side of the road in Australia.

I'll do an accent.

Drive on the right side of Australia in Australia.

love the narr

okay, let's get to our interviews.

We have Kevin Clark in studio, and then we have a great interview with A.J.

Brown from Eagles Camp.

Before we get to Kevin Clark, he's brought to you by our great friends over at Truly.

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And now here's Kevin Clark.

Okay, we now welcome on a very special guest, friend of ours, never been on.

Never.

First time, it is Kevin Clark.

You can watch This Is Football on ESPN2.

He's everywhere.

He's plugged into the league.

He's been traveling around all summer.

So we're going to get some intel, maybe a little preview.

Football's almost back.

He also moonlights as a Geek Squad member at Best Buy.

So let's start there.

Stephen A.

Smith said that you're a member of Geek Squad from Best Buy.

You got to fight him, dude.

So the content, he was being complimentary of me.

He said, you're doing a great job.

He had to do a little dig.

My dad, so an alpha announcing aggregates it and says everything now they said

Stephen a gives Kevin Clark his full endorsement dot dot dot even though he looks like a member of geek squad okay so my dad forwards it to our entire family and just lops off the second half of the headline which was amazing

but no I I I Do like I can lean into that.

That's fine.

Like I can I can do the geek stuff.

I'm I got I'm into the numbers stuff.

So I'm good with it.

I don't have to fight him.

All right.

Stephen A's tall.

Yeah, you should have just challenged him because I don't know if he's about that.

I don't know if he would have stood on that business.

I don't don't think Stephen A.

Smith fights anymore.

I think he's got people that would do that for him.

Imagine if you beat him up, though, because then his whole fight with LeBron looks really foolish.

You kick the shit out of Stephen A.

Smith, and then he's, and next time he tries to be like, yeah, LeBron, if you come at me like a man, it's like, dude, Kevin Clark beat your ass.

I'd probably get beat up.

That'd be my guess.

Come on.

That'd be my guess.

Who is a more demanding person to work with?

Stephen A.

Smith or Peyton Manning?

Well, so

I've only done two episodes of Stephen A.

It's been amazing.

We haven't even been in the the same room yet.

Peyton is a sounds like he's really close.

No, no,

they're both forces of nature.

Like, they're both.

So, like, Peyton, the reason I have Peyton Manning's phone number is because he was on my show talking about Kevin O'Connell.

And this is just like exactly what you think Peyton would be.

And

we wrap up.

I go like make a lunch or whatever.

And I got this number that I've never seen before.

And just a wall of text.

And he's like, hey, just one more thing on Kevin O'Connell's offense.

And he just sends me like paragraphs about how much he loves the vikings offense so it's like it's that kind of thing where like i don't hear from him all the time but like i hear from him enough where it's like he just wants to talk ball that's all he wants to do that's all he wants to do similar to gruden yes

all they want to do is just like hey i you know i i have so many thoughts on the vikings that i'm just going to send a wall of text or voice memo do do his eyes like similar to gruden do his eyes kind of glaze over when you just do any topic besides football because grudin it's very funny like he he will not he's not rude about it but it's like he's just like hey can we get back to football?

Jack travels with Peyton.

What's your take on what happens when we're talking here, I'm talking the mic.

Talking the mic.

No, Kevin's mic.

Share Mike.

Mike to Mike.

What's the question exactly?

When you're not talking football with Peyton Manning, does he get a little, not bored, but like, hey, can we get back to football?

Yeah, I mean, I try to keep it very surface-level questions about football because I know the second I start asking about like cover two or cover three, then he takes it to a next level.

Yeah, yeah.

You got to pretend to understand what he's saying.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

He's dialed on football all the time.

I love that.

Yeah.

He's a football guy through and through.

Big time.

That's what it's all truly.

Like, that's all he cares about.

Yeah.

I think one time we're trying to explain Chapel Roan to John Gruden, and I think to murder everybody.

Yeah.

He's like, get me the fuck out of here.

So can we talk about quarterbacks again?

Let's get back to.

Didn't he say on your show a couple months ago that he was getting dialed in on music?

A little bit.

Yeah, he is listening to new music.

I forget what new artist he's really into these days.

There was somebody that he was all about for like a couple weeks.

But that's like a true football guy.

In the offseason, you start to get a little antsy.

You start to get new habits in like May, June, and then July hits, and you're like, oh, yeah, I'm back to football.

Forget about music.

I don't care about music.

Football.

It's football season.

So you are also dialed into football.

Like I said at the start, you've been traveling around.

We got some questions.

Like, we'll use this as a little bit of NFL preview, which I feel like you can't do enough NFL previews.

This time of year, it's just like, what do we want to talk about?

Oh, let's talk about football, even though they're not playing yet.

But let's start with the big news, Micah Parsons.

So first question is, Micah Parsons will play week one for?

Probably the Dallas Cowboys.

Okay.

So there's a couple things about it.

First of all, we're just now finding out after 40 years that Jerry Jones doesn't negotiate with agents.

Yeah.

Which is like one of those things that we probably should have found out a long time ago.

I'm just glad.

So I think it's coming out now because Jerry, there's an element of professional wrestling in everything that Jerry Jones does.

And there's one guy who in the last 40 years was like, I don't want to do the professional wrestling thing.

And because of that, everything, the entire franchise has collapsed.

Like, they're like,

he demanded a trade, which CeeDee Lamb didn't do.

Ezekiel Elliott just went to Cabo instead of demanding a trade.

Dak Prescott didn't demand a trade.

And so I think it's going to get done, but it just shows you how fragile the whole thing was because Jerry thought he was doing a bit, and Micah was like, I don't want to do a bit.

I want

$45 million a year.

That was a good bit.

That's my bit.

That's my bit.

And so now we're, I don't know.

Like, I think this is one,

this is the situation that Jerry can't win in, which is that this guy does not want to play Jerry's stupid game.

Right.

And then I saw Jerry.

He said, like, this is all part of the negotiation process.

It's mom and a dad.

I don't think that Micah knew that this was part of the process.

Right.

It should have been.

He should have been like professional wrestling, and he should have, like, taken him into a back room and be like, these are the moves I'm going to do with you.

Like, you have to have buy-in if you're going to do a professional wrestling bit.

And that also is where I feel like it's headed.

If the answer is Dallas Cowboys, it's headed towards Micah Parsons' new contract getting announced right before Thursday Night Football.

Yes, maybe that's what he likes to do.

He wants to steal Banner Knight from the Eagles, being like Micah Parsons.

That's it.

He's just obsessed with himself.

The guidepost for Jerry is like, he wants to win, sure, like in some vague way, but he really wants to get credit for winning.

And he wants the headlines.

He wants the headlines, but he wants people to be talking about Jerry Jones being a smart football guy.

Like, we already have proof of concept.

Like, I said on TV a couple weeks ago, where I was like, if you, if you, if the football gods were like, hey, you can win three Super Bowls, but you you can't give a press conference about it, he'd be like, no deal.

Like he wants to talk about it.

That's the point.

And people were like, oh, well, I don't know about that.

He fired Jimmy Johnson because he was like, I don't know if I'm getting enough credit for this one.

I'm not like, I'm not

in the inner circle of the coaching staff.

I want more power.

I want more

just shine in this.

Like, Jimmy's getting so much shine from these Super Bowls.

Like, I don't like this.

He'd rather have Dave Campo and,

you know, Harry Switzer won a Super Bowl.

Harry Switzer.

He did.

Jason Garrett, like all those guys.

He'd rather have that than win.

And the reason we know this is because if he wanted to change, he would.

He's done nothing to change the franchise.

And he's not going to at this point.

All right.

So just let's do a hypothetical.

He's not on the Dallas Cowboys.

What is the cost?

And is there even one team that

shouldn't be in the running for this?

Because to me, it's such a no-brainer that every team should be calling the Cowboys.

All 31.

Yeah, like it's not even...

People are like, oh, two first-round picks.

Who the fuck cares?

If you have Micah Parsons, you're not going to get a guy in the next two drafts that's better than Micah Parsons.

No, and what's funny is to see the trade proposals, fan bases cook up.

Oh, yeah.

It's like one first-round pick and then like our bust defense.

Yeah, our worst player.

Yeah, like, well, maybe.

We'll part with that.

It'd probably be three first-round picks.

Really?

Yeah, yes.

Because the Cowboys want to keep them.

The franchise tag existing.

Yeah.

When you think about it, it's the craziest thing in sports.

They're allowed to keep guys for three extra years because they're good at their job.

Right.

And it's cost-controlled.

And that's what the Cowboys will just do.

Like, they will control.

Mike is playing on his fifth-year option right now, which, by the way,

there's some dishonest ways to look at this, but they're paying

Micah and Dak as much as the Eagles are paying their top four guys, which is hurts my lot of Lane Johnson and A.J.

Brown.

So, like, that's Howie versus how Jerry Jones operates.

Right.

And that's a huge quarterback contract and then a guy playing on his fifth-year option.

But I think the Cowboys don't want to trade him.

And the franchise tag is the most,

it is the best leverage in sports that teams have.

Like, no one else has anything approaching that.

So, I I don't, my, my feeling on it, and I've said this before, and I can't think of a counterfactual.

I don't think a team, an NFL team, has ever traded a guy they wanted to keep.

Right.

Because you think about Rodgers, and he was like, I want out.

And they were like, thanks for the suggestion.

We're going to keep you two more years until Jordan Love is ready.

Russell Wilson, same thing in Seattle.

Like, there's never really an element of teams being like, oh, this guy.

Like, the NBA now, like, you demand a trade, and they're like, okay, yeah.

Well, here's your plane ticket.

And in the NFL,

I do not think there's ever been a negotiation where John Gruden traded traded Khalil Mack.

Like his whole thing was we stunk on defense with you.

Like we'll just take the picks and figure it out later.

Like that's the kind of stuff that happens in the NFL.

It's not, oh, this guy really wants out and we're just going to do it as a favor to the agent or whatever is going on in the NBA.

Right.

No, Micah Parsons is going to go anywhere.

Okay.

Unless Jerry decides.

I mean, I think what might get it done is if they just carbon copy the Herschel Walker deal.

Because then Jerry would be like, that was a great trade for me.

Those are great trade.

We're back.

We ended up winning Super Bowls based off that.

We got Immitted Smith.

It would have to be massive and the team team they were trading with would have to stink.

It would probably have to be the Vikings.

It would have to be the exact same trade.

And then Jerry would be like, okay, I'll do it.

Is there a possibility that Micah just sits out?

I don't think so.

What does that help with?

Like,

you don't get a year closer to free agency.

You don't get money.

You don't get money.

You get a year older.

And I also think there's an element, the league just doesn't like that.

Like, the league is just going to be like, this sucks.

And not, if you can't get two or three, whatever it would cost first-round picks now, you're not going to get it after waiting out a a year.

That's just not how it works.

What do you think Brian Schottenheimer thinks about this whole thing?

He probably was thinking

he'll get like a couple weeks or a couple months of a grace period before this.

By the way, we should remind everyone that Brian Schottheimer is the coach of the Cowboys.

Jerry Jones just looked down the hallway and was like, You, you coach now.

That's what I was going to say.

Is like, he's probably like, oh my God, this is so cool.

I got to be the head coach of the Cowboys.

Like, he's probably

whatever happens to him.

We're doing Micah.

Okay, yeah.

Let's do the Micah storyline.

Cool.

Cool.

He's just so into it.

Like, there's no way.

Yeah.

It's like, it's like, did you guys ever see the movie King Ralph?

No.

It's with John Goodman.

It's from like 40 years ago.

And

I don't want to get the plot wrong.

Obviously, a lot of King Ralph guys out there, but you're going to basically

all the members of the royal family die.

And this guy in Wisconsin,

Packers,

John Goodman, becomes the king of England.

And just because he just got elevated.

Henry plot line.

And it's such an amazing.

Can we reboot that?

Yeah.

Who would play that now?

Probably John Goodman.

Probably still.

Yeah, probably still John Goodman.

Probably John Goodman.

But like, that's, sometimes you get these head coaches who are in total King Ralph mode, and they're just like, I didn't expect to be the King of England.

Right.

This is amazing.

So I don't know how much he's complaining, but he's probably,

listen, he's like a good guy.

I've interviewed him before.

Players obviously like him.

I'm not being like flippant about it.

He probably, you know, not probably, he obviously wants to win.

And I think he knows that this is going to get figured out like everything else does.

Yeah.

yeah.

What about the other hold-ins across the league?

James Cook was yesterday.

I was in Buffalo for that.

Business.

Business.

That'll probably get done.

Like, I don't, I'm not.

All of these.

So, James Cook is a hold-in.

Who are the other hold-ins?

There's Terry and Terry Hendrix.

Oh, that's the one you're asking about.

Yeah, I was dancing around Terry.

Yeah.

You would see that we don't care about James.

Don't get it.

I don't know.

This thing about the commanders not wanting to sign a guy over 30 years old for that kind of money.

Yeah.

People were embarrassed to be commanders fans until like two years ago.

And the entire,

except for you.

Yeah.

But were you?

I mean, I hated Dan Snyder.

Okay.

I still do.

Yeah.

I hope he's listening right now, and I hope he's crying.

I'd be surprised if he was listening.

I would be surprised if he's crying.

He's probably just happy.

I'm being honest.

He's probably on a yacht.

He's cackling an island somewhere.

I think he might be better chance he's listening than crying.

Did he ever come back?

Remember when he was avoiding like testifying?

Oh, he's never come back.

Yeah, no, he's on his yacht.

He's still there.

Foreign territory.

He's left international waters.

No, he's just been floating around on his own private yacht for the last like four years.

Still downloading, pardon my taste.

Still downloading the podcast.

Shout out to him.

I don't know why.

I think they should, I think both sides should cave because this is just too important.

And like Jaden Daniels, the deep ball needs to get better.

I talked to him a couple days ago, as you did.

And

he said to me, I was like, how can the deep ball get better?

Because Because he was so good at LSU.

He was like better than Joe Burrow as far as 40-yard chunk plays.

And that means he's the best in history.

And he said, they got to a point at LSU when it was Malik Neighbors and Brian Thomas where they repped it so much that they knew if they had man coverage they were going to win like exactly how to how to get the ball down the field exactly where to place it all that stuff the only way to get that at the NFL level is for him and Ty McLaren to just work on that every day for the next 40 days and then and then you get there that's the one place where they left me on the bone is the deep passing and so I don't I think that they need to give him the DK Metcalf contract and call it a day.

Like, I don't understand this, like, oh, we can't pay him for 30.

Like, you have a chance legitimately to win a Super Bowl this year.

Like, you can't screw that up.

The fan base has PTSD.

And, like, I know it's like, oh,

analytics, you can't do this.

You can't, like, you can't use that as a guidebook.

Yes, you can.

Like, the fan base attitude matters.

Like, they deserve good things.

Right.

I think Terry deserves good things too.

Yes.

Like, he's been the ideal football player that you want on just objectively shitty teams.

Yes.

And the guy that always showed up, worked hard.

And it's also like the timeline.

Jaden Daniel's on a rookie contract.

This is when you can

pay guys.

You can go out and get another guy through it.

Like, trade for Trey Henderson.

I don't know.

I think you just go out and do it.

Like, Vaughan Miller was playing like 17 snaps a game last year.

He's going to be like a fourth quarter guy.

You can still use another password.

Go out and take a swing.

You don't have to be a process guy just because the ownership is from the 76ers, which, by the way, the process didn't even work.

Well, no, disagree.

The process of the process worked.

They got the first picks, right?

Yeah.

The results of the process didn't work.

And it's process guys.

We still don't have the results.

Yeah, we don't know what happens.

As long as the Joe Mbiat is there.

It's not even Joe Mbi, it's just like forever.

As long as the process, as long as one link back to the process exists, they could win a championship in 20 years and be like, kind of worked.

That's a good point.

It's still open.

Like, if Joe Mbi gets traded, those guys then become part of the process.

Yeah, it's an open door.

It's like the Thunder,

Thunder made a trade with the Magic 2016 for Ola Depot and Serge Abaca.

And like the After Effects got them like all of their players that have now.

That's right.

You're a Magic fan.

You are the Magic fan.

I'm the Magic fan.

What other Magic fans are there?

You're the only one that are.

Yeah, Steve Serudi.

Tiger Woods was one.

This is a little bit controversial.

So Tiger Woods was a Magic fan.

He was sitting courtside for like a decade.

And then they played the Lakers in the finals.

And he released a statement.

basically saying he hopes both teams have fun.

Both teams win.

And I think that you've been kicked out of eternity fraternity at that point.

You just got to pick a side there.

In the finals, you just got to pick a side.

He was basically like, you know, I grew up there.

And first of all, just also don't release a statement.

Just don't say that.

No, yeah, just pick a side.

Just don't say it.

Or just don't even go to the game.

Black shirt.

Yeah, just don't go to the game.

The Rob Low hat.

Yeah.

Just keep it to yourself, dude.

A couple golfers are Magic fans.

That makes sense.

Because the whole golfer community there.

But no, same thing.

Like, it's the same thing as the Terry McClure thing.

Like, they went out and got Desmond Bain, and they're going to win now because they're going out and taking the swing.

And I've been horrified sometimes to be a Magic fan over the past 14 years.

And they haven't had like a top half offense, top half of the league offense since Dwight Howard left.

And that's a little embarrassing.

But the Terry McCarthy thing, like, you know, he's the best go ball receiver in football or second or something like that, best tight window receiver in football.

Like, go out and just fix it.

I agree.

Pay Terry.

It's pretty.

Pay Terry.

So, what about the Bengals?

Because I feel like they've gotten off to that terrible slow start for the last, what, three seasons.

One was because of appendicitis.

I get that.

He had surgery.

Yeah.

But they just tend to start slow.

I do feel like Zach Taylor might be.

There's some hot seat talk about Zach Taylor if it doesn't.

I guess, but the Brown fans, this is the whole thing with Marvin Lewis.

If he has a year left on his contract, he's not going to get fired.

They don't do it, they're not making moves when they don't need to.

That's true.

Yeah, they're a weird organization.

They're the Cowboys' weirder older cousin.

Yeah, so how would you describe the Bengals to somebody that might not be familiar with how Mr.

Brown does business?

They had to

sell naming rights to the stadium to sign Joe Burrow.

That's a little different.

Yeah.

My theory on that was that they should have just had whoever was going to buy the rights to the stadium should have just bought the naming rights to Joe Burrow's contract.

Or just to Joe Burrow.

To Joe Burrow.

So that way they're saying, like, it's the paycor, I think it's the paycorp stadium.

So you have to say the paycorp, Joe Burrow.

Joe Paycor.

Yeah.

Yeah, Joe Paycor.

Yeah.

Yes, yes.

And just do it that way.

And then all of a sudden, you know, there's probably some salary cap relief, and Paycor gets its

funny situation.

Might be a dumb question.

Is an organization like Paycorp, would they be allowed to pay Joe Burrow like, here's $50 million?

I think there's some salary cap circumvention as far as that goes.

You got to get creative with the cap.

You got to be creative with the cap.

There was some of that.

Weren't there stories about some teams questioning whether or not

the TB12 stuff was cap circumvention?

Right.

Draft was helping out TB12.

And then it's like, is that...

There were some rumblings 10 years ago from teams just complaining.

But back then, there was a lot of Patriots derangement syndrome a decade ago where people were just complaining about everything that they did.

So that could have been part of it.

But

I assume there'd be an investigation.

First of all, if Joe Burrow showed up with a different.

Yeah, they probably would.

What about Jaden Raytheon?

Let's do it.

Yeah.

Just find out.

The only way to find out is to do it.

Yeah.

That's true.

We're in the arena.

We're making things happen.

Yeah, listen.

Jaden Raytheon.

Move fast, breakstar, right?

Let them punish us after the fact.

Who would be a coach that might be a surprise hot seat guy this year?

Mike McDaniel's not that surprised, right?

No.

No, I don't think so.

I mean, he's just, he feels sad.

I think he's sad.

What should have worked?

It should have worked.

Like, they had a really good team two years ago.

Tyreek and Waddle.

He made Tua a lot better.

But like, the one thing that's funny about McDaniel is how much ex-players on TV hate Mike McDaniel.

They really hate him.

Like, every time I'm like, oh, I'm going to go hard on the dolphins, some guy next to me is like, this is the worst team.

This is the worst coach in the world.

I'm like, oh, okay.

I'm trying to think who else could be.

With Mike McDaniel, though, what happened this offseason with Tyreek Hill?

Because Tyreek seems like he's openly being antagonistic to his head coach right now.

I don't think he wants to be there.

He said he didn't want to be there anymore.

And then Tua was like,

he's got to fix that relationship.

It doesn't sound like he's doing it.

No.

And he also, he got worse last year.

He had

first two years he was in Miami, he led the NFL in deep receptions.

It was 20 each season.

Last year he had five.

And it's not like he was playing with Tyler Huntley the entire season.

Like it was just the number, and he was hurt, and he had the thing week one that was obviously the craziest thing.

So there's context there.

Like he wasn't amazing to where a team's going to be like, hey, let's give you the Michael.

Let's give you the Herschel Walker trade for the kill.

So he's kind of there.

So it's kind of a make work there.

Right.

And so I don't,

it has the possibility to be.

Such a sad place this year.

Yeah.

Yeah.

They could lose a lot and then everybody's getting injured.

Yeah.

And then they start losing and everybody knows they're getting fired and it should have worked and they have a lot of guys under big contracts and just going to be really sad.

He seems like someone that would be a really good second job candidate too, where it's like everything you described, like he's a good coach.

He's a really good coach.

And then he makes quarterbacks better.

Yeah.

And then this happens.

All right.

So I love this time of year trying to figure out, we know how the NFL works.

When you look at like who made the playoffs last year, you can just essentially say three of those teams are not going to make the playoffs.

And so I try to figure out what's a team that maybe everyone's low on that you could buy low.

I got two teams I want to throw out.

Okay.

And I think they might be a little crazy, but I want to hear what you have to say.

The first is the New York Giants.

Yeah, I think that's a little crazy.

Okay.

I think that's a little crazy.

I think their defense would be really good.

And their defense is going to be good.

What's the offense there?

Is it Jackson?

Jameis.

Jameis.

It's got to be Jameis.

It's Russ for the first four weeks, and then they go to Jameis.

Yeah.

Crinkle in a little Tommy DeVito, but then Jameis.

You don't think it's surprising people?

I mean, their pass rush should be one of the best units in all of the NFL.

Yeah, I agree.

I think that

the way they've handled it, and you look at Abdul Carter, the practice clips are unbelievable.

And I think there's going to be a step forward there.

I just think on offense,

there's nothing doing.

Yeah, it can be a little sad.

And I don't think Russell Wilson can give you much.

I think they're going to go to Jackson Dart just because of job preservation.

The only way they save their job is either they win a bunch of games with Russell Wilson, which seems, or Jameis, which seems to be cool.

I don't think it's not, this is not, my thought is not predicated on Russell Wilson.

Just want that clear.

I do not think he's cooked anymore.

But I think they have to start Jackson Dark to save their job.

Yeah.

Like, oh, look at that.

We can't start over.

We've got a guy.

We've got a guy here, so we've got to save our jobs.

Win some ugly games.

Sure.

I just don't.

When have they won ugly games?

Like, I just don't.

I don't know.

Again, I'd say this is crazy.

And then the other one might be even crazier.

I actually feel stronger about the Giants than the other one, the Raiders.

That's not crazy, but the division is too hard.

The Broncos are really good.

I think the Chargers are pretty good.

I know.

And then you have the Kansas City Chiefs.

But one of those teams is not going to make the playoffs.

Just by, if you just go historically, like I said, the 17.

Someone gets injured.

Yeah.

Like, something happens that we don't see coming.

I think Geno Smith's really good.

And Pete Carroll gives consistency to that

that they haven't had in a while.

Brock Bowers is good.

They probably need another receiver.

Defense can be okay.

Yeah.

Pete Carroll is really good.

He's a really good coach.

And I think that the vibes can be high there, but I think it's like a nine-win team.

Okay, so maybe I'm downgrading them from playoffs, but it's more

the Raiders can both be teams.

If you look at the schedule and you're like, that's a win, maybe.

I think the Raiders would be much better than me.

I don't think that's that crazy.

Okay.

All right.

I don't think that's that crazy.

What about the Chargers in that division?

I love the Chargers.

I love the Chargers.

I don't want to delve too deep into this.

The Najee Harris thing is weird.

Yeah.

It's weird.

Wait, which one?

Are you talking about the guy from Fresno that was on TV?

That Najee Harris?

There was a different Najee Harris that got injured in a fireworks accident.

Yeah, yeah.

But then the other one also had a fireworks.

Yeah.

It was crazy.

It was a wild couple days.

Yeah.

So I just want to clarify which one you're talking about.

There was a tweet yesterday that was like, it was from a beat writer that was like, hey, Najee Harris is working off to the side.

And remember, a month ago, he was deemed totally fine.

Right.

Everything was good.

So yesterday it was like he's working off to the side.

And then there was a follow-up tweet that was like, never mind.

He's just standing there.

And so

that doesn't sound great.

No.

He's been, you know, it doesn't seem good.

But Hampton, bigger back, they want to run the ball.

Again, probably need another receiver.

I think Jim Harbaugh is amazing.

So they'll probably win a bunch.

I think they're probably going to make the playoffs.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I think

they are going to be third place in the division and like beat teams they shouldn't or should, whatever.

And then

still, like, the Broncos and the Chiefs team are too good.

The Broncos are awesome.

The Broncos are a wagon, dude.

So, all right, so then you give us a couple teams that you could see making it into the playoffs that weren't in the playoffs last year.

So, I don't really, I don't want to give you hope.

I think the Bears might be okay.

Okay is where I'm fine with.

Okay,

okay is okay.

How are you processing?

How are you processing Caleb Williams missing a net?

AI?

I think it's AI.

Yeah.

No,

I'm trying to get more mature where it's like, look,

what I liken it to is our social team.

Yeah, I assume all across the internet, they're basically like police officers at the end of the month.

They got to get their quota up.

What do you do?

You hit the Caleb Williams' bad button.

Instant reach.

What if he's bad?

He could be bad.

My take on the Bears this year is: I am excited for the fact that we have eliminated everything around Caleb Williams, and we will find out if Caleb Williams is good, which is a good thing to do.

You got to find out.

You got to find out.

The coaches should be great.

The offensive line is fixed.

He's got weapons.

Like, if Caleb Williams has a bad year, I'm not going to sit here and be like, oh, he might, you know, he needs this.

He needs that.

No, no.

He's got it.

This has got to be.

Joe Tooney, Drew Dahlman.

There's got to be a Dunes.

A progression, like Colson Loveland, you know.

Colson Loveland, Cole Komet.

Yeah.

So.

No Keenan Allen out there.

Yeah.

That Keenan Allen

interception at the end of the year was so funny, though.

When he's just like, fuck it, it's week 18.

Speaking of aggregators, people are still like, Keenan Allen's still available.

I think he's going to go to the Chargers.

Okay.

Yeah.

What's that going to do?

Yeah.

He's big.

He's a big hero.

Thursday.

so my friends and I have something we call the Carmelo zone.

Remember when Carmelo was like on his eighth team?

Yeah.

And it was like every show was like, or is Carmelo gonna sign?

So the league doesn't care about Carmelo Anthony.

So like, why are you talking about this all the time?

All respect to Carmelo had an amazing career.

But obviously, it's like Blazers Carmelo wasn't a huge bidding war for him.

Yes.

And so I think in the NFL, we get that even quicker, like Titans Julio Jones, right?

Where it's like, oh my God, someone's getting a stud.

And it's like, well, not really.

Yeah.

He moves on from these guys pretty quickly.

And Keenan Allen is firmly in that zone right now, but we're getting like daily updates on him.

Judevian Clown has played his entire career in that zone.

Yeah, he has.

He's really figured it out.

That man loves to travel.

Where is he right now?

I thought

he was on Carolina.

I think he's afraid right now, right?

I think he's just waiting.

He's just skipping.

He's in Carolina, then he went to Baltimore.

Wait, so you don't think the Bears are a playoff team?

No, I think they might be.

Oh, okay.

Domini Foxbury thinks they're going to win the division.

Okay.

I'm not, I think the Packers are very good.

I'm picking the Packers.

Yeah.

But I think the Bears can make the playoffs.

I I think Ben Johnson's really good.

I think we already discussed all the upgrades.

Like, Roma Dunze is really good.

Yeah, it's just Caleb.

He's got to be good.

Plus Caleb.

Yeah.

And I think that he was so bad last year when he held on to the ball.

That's the big thing.

He's got to know when to quit play.

I have a theory.

I don't want to

go into generational warfare here about it.

No, I like this.

I like where we're going.

Yeah.

I think young quarterbacks hold on to the ball too long because they were never punished when they were in high school.

Like when you, if you were like born in 1985, you were playing on like concrete and then a little turf over it.

And if you held onto the ball too long, you were legally allowed to be like get a tombstone into the concrete.

That was what happened when you held onto the ball too long in the 90s.

And now the way the quarterbacks develop, like they're playing seven and seven all the time and they're playing high school where you can't hit the quarterback and then college where it's all the spread stuff, get rid of the ball quickly.

And so they get to the NFL and they just hold on the ball forever because they've never been punished.

Where it's like, if you were 10 years ago, you just had to get rid of the ball or else you would die.

Yeah.

Existential thing.

And now you've got this whole generation of quarterbacks who are like, I'm just going to pat the ball and just see what happens.

I also think you could throw in like, you know, Madden playing Madden, where you can just drift backwards.

You know what I mean?

Yes.

And it's like, that's not how real world works in the NFL.

But like, if you play Madden, you can just be like, I'm not even going to care about a pocket.

I'm just going to drift back.

In NCAA, all I do is just roll to the right, wait for a crosser to open up

a 25-yard chunk play.

Right.

When I get a ribbon that's had like five broken ribs by the time he gets out of high school.

And his dad didn't let him play video game.

Yeah, maybe there's like a European thing.

Like, you know how Euroball, they say the fundamentals are better?

Like, is there like an Austrian league where they're just punishing people?

Just killing the quarterbacks.

I feel like that does still happen down south a little bit.

A little bit, yeah, probably.

Yeah, but we should just maybe.

Don't get a California quarterback.

Don't get a California quarterback.

Do not look up where Jaden Daniels is from.

Or

Caleb's from D.C.

D.C., but then, yeah, California.

He's like an honorary California.

Where should they be from?

Arkansas?

I think

Louisiana.

I would say Western PA, too.

Alabama and Ohio.

Ohio.

Ohio quarterbacks.

I feel like Ohio quarterbacks took a lot of points.

Burrow looks like he's taken hits in high school.

Yeah.

All right, so what other teams?

What teams are going to surprise us not in the playoffs last year?

Like you're high up.

I mentioned the Broncos earlier.

I think they're a Super Bowl contender.

Yep.

I think they're a division contender.

Super Bowl contender.

I think they're amazing.

I love it.

I think they're amazing.

I'm a believer in Bro Knicks.

I'm a believer.

I was a big defensive player of the year year candidates last year.

The Bo Nicks thing to me, it makes total sense.

Last year in college football, there were six pretty good quarterbacks because the COVID year let everybody find their quarterback destiny.

That's the Cam Ward story, too.

He kept transferring until he was the number one overall pick.

Same thing happened.

There's a reason there were six really good quarterbacks in the draft last year is because these guys had five years to figure it out.

So Bo Nicks, to me, the fact that he found a home in Oregon and then he played a million snaps.

He played like a thousand more snaps than J.J.

McCarthy did.

It's funny that the worst quarterback in the draft class two years ago was the guy who went three and out.

It was just your quarterback.

Yeah.

So maybe playing a lot of football matters.

Maybe that's a thing.

It does.

But no, I think the Broncos are amazing.

They have one of the five best rosters in football.

Yeah.

Okay.

What about the Lions?

We were just in that division.

Yeah.

Is there a reason to panic based off the Hall of Fame game?

We take a lot.

I did see the aggregators be like major aggression years.

Yeah.

No, there's no, there's no, the roster is so good.

It's just so stacked.

That's the best way to, like, there's a anecdote in Seth Wickersham's book about the Patriots where after the Patriots lost Romeo Cornell and Charlie Weiss, that somebody was on the field and they were talking to another coach and they were like, man, this is going to be a weird year.

And the guy was like, it's all Bill.

Like, it's all Bill.

Don't sweat it.

And I think that some of these teams, like Dan Campbell, I have another theory.

This is that Dan Campbell is so jacked that people think he's not an offensive coach.

Yeah.

Like he doesn't look like Mike McDaniels.

Yeah, you assume

he's like a defensive guru.

Yeah.

Yeah.

But he played tight end.

Like, he's the one that nurtured Ben Johnson from an assistant tight end coach in Miami to an offensive coordinator in Detroit.

So

the other thing about Dan, he told me once, like, he's the perfect mix of

gut feel and analytics and how they dovetail sometimes.

So he told me that the reason he goes for an fourth down so much is that when he was with Sean Payton, who's analytically minded, that he would see how freaking scared the defense was.

Yeah.

When he would go for it, and And he was like, I want to do that.

Like, that's what I want.

I want to see defensive coordinators pissing themselves, basically, because we're going forward on fourth and four and taking a shot.

Like, not, they're not running the tushbush.

They're like trying to go 30 yards down the field.

No shots at the tushbush.

But

I just think that Dan Campbell is just so unique.

And he's really become, because of Ben Johnson, really become underrated.

Like, he had the, he authored the best culture change I've ever seen in football.

Yeah.

Ever.

Like, the Lions were a joke for 40 years.

And he understood exactly what that franchise needed.

He wanted the job.

Like, he was tearing up in our interview his first year because he was talking about he was a player there during the financial crisis in 08 and how hard Detroit got hit.

And he was like, I wanted all of Detroit to know I feel their pain.

And I don't think there's ever been a better story than that in coaching.

And yet, four years later, we're like, can Dan Campbell really do this?

It's a joke.

It's a joke.

Like, Dan Campbell's going to do it.

The only thing I'll say about the Lions is, doesn't it feel like last year was such a everything was set up perfectly?

And they got hurt.

And then the kind of air comes out of the balloon a little bit.

Like, they're still very good, but that's just kind of how the league works where it's, you know,

last year was the year.

Like, that was the year.

They had the home field advantage.

They, you know, won 15 games, all these things.

And then to get back up off the mat, you get the brain drain.

I think a lot of it goes to Aiden Hutchinson's health.

Yeah.

If he comes back.

Yeah, he was going to be the defensive player of the year.

Bro, he he was like top 10 in pressures in like December.

Oh, yeah.

We always would just update it.

Like it'd be like in the like week 15, we'd be like, oh, Aiden Hutchinson's still number four.

He had an MVP case that he was making.

He really did.

He really did.

And like, it's part of it.

I always think that they should give retroactive Coach of the Year and Defensive Player of the Year awards.

I remember there was a year where Earl Thomas went out and the Seahawks just forgot to play football.

And it's like, we should just go ahead and start giving DPOIs to Earl Thomas because you see it right there.

Like Mike Tomlin should get like four coach of the years for the Antonio Brown L'Veon Bell years.

Like, just more.

Just give him more.

Like, he should be awarded five years after the fact, or there should be two awards.

Yeah.

Like, the retroactive coach of the year.

But, like, Hutchinson, same deal.

Like, you should have given him DPOI because you saw what happened when he went out.

Yeah, it's totally different.

I think the Jets fans are very excited because they've got a new coach from that system.

Bears fans, obviously, excited because they got that.

But we've always said about Dan Gamble that the smartest thing that he's done is make people think that he's stupid.

Yes.

Like throwing out all the meathead stuff that's, and I do think he's like a significant part meathead.

I think he's probably like 50% meathead.

But he's also very smart and he loves to be underestimated by people.

So when he goes on podcasts and he's like, yeah, I'm thinking about getting a lion on the sidelines, then that's good because now people are like, look at this clown.

And he's like behind the scenes.

Actually, if you look at the numbers of when he goes for it, that dude absolutely knows the analytics through and through because he follows it to a T.

Yes.

I think he's a very smart guy.

And he's going to get the reverse of what I just said, you know, the year, last year was their year and all that.

He just gets to play chip on the shoulder.

He's probably.

People are doubting him.

You know, like it, that is a big thing.

I'm going there in two days.

So it'd be great if by the time I'm there, he's already clipped this and has it.

And so then the players can't.

Chip on the shoulder.

Yeah, chip on the shoulder.

Yeah, yeah.

Last year was the year.

Well, we're massive, Dan Campbell.

Well, do you want to trip it right now?

So last year, let's just say you last year was the year.

Last year was the year.

It's staying.

So 2025,

you think they have no chance.

Yeah, I mean, they missed their window.

It's staying.

Here goes this.

He was such a good story, and it all fell apart.

And

he lost his boy geniuses.

Yeah.

Aaron Glenn, boy geniuses.

It's sad.

It's actually shocking that Dan Campbell can even

find the facility every day.

Without his boy geniuses.

Yeah.

Yeah.

They were putting the address in the GPS every single day.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Ben Johnson was sitting shotgun.

I'm like, gonna take a left here, Dan.

You see the Hall of Fame game?

It was terrible.

Bad offensive line play, right?

I will say this.

He did a linebacker returning kicks, which I don't know about that one.

He was freaky with it.

Yeah, that was his.

I was like, what the fuck is that?

That was the one thing.

You can clip that down.

I don't know about that one.

All right.

Other teams that you're high on that we're not looking at?

Because, you know, like, I think the AFC, you obviously could say Chiefs, the Ravens, the Bills.

You like the Broncos a lot.

I love the Broncos.

But, like, who's another one?

You know who I think is going to be pretty good?

Is the Tennessee Titans.

Oh.

I think Cam Ward.

Now, that has no.

Completely unbiased.

We want this on the record, completely unbiased.

I think Evan Clark is not one of those psycho Miami fans that says they're back every single year.

They won 10 games this year.

They won 10 games.

Okay.

In the ACC.

Yeah.

Okay.

Syracuse.

Yeah, I know.

We play in a lot.

We play in a big boy league.

And we also

currently suit you.

And we got your fucking quarterback who's stunk.

Wait, wait, you're not my fault.

You're suing Miami.

Wisconsin is super.

Miami was tampered.

Yeah, we were the first.

We invented the market.

I was tampering six months ago.

They were tampered.

Miami's never tampered.

Hey, I have a question.

Why, when Tanner Mordecai wasn't in the portal, was it reported he was going to Wisconsin a couple years ago?

I don't understand.

I don't know the portal, dude.

You fucking figure it out.

You're a geek squad guy.

Go back to the Titans.

So

I will say this.

The Syracuse game was the worst thing that's ever happened to me, like in life.

I've thought about it.

It was the worst things that ever happened to me.

Okay, that's a pretty good life.

Yeah, no, I thought about that, too.

How lucky am I?

There's a thing I talk about.

Pretty good life.

What I think about every day in the shower is like we blew a 21.

Yeah, you just delayed when you're going to get your ass kicked.

Yeah, but it would have nice.

It would have been.

No, I agree.

It's about the ride in college football, especially.

It's the journey.

Taking it to the playoff is cool.

All that stuff.

I have a thing real quick about, so I had my son there, and like, there were two things about it.

Number one is, I knew we were going to lose when my son, who loves sports, put his hands over his ears during a big third down.

And I was like, the kids fucking rattled.

Yeah, we're done.

He's like so happy and he's like, he's choking.

He's choking.

Stadium pulse.

He's choking.

He was

my son literally was choking because of the stadium pulse at the carrier dome.

But then the other thing is, when the game ended, my wife was like looking at me like, if he expires right now, like if he hits the eject button, like you're, he'd been for a four-hour game.

So as soon as Miami loses, I pick him up and I

run out and we get him in the car and he falls asleep.

I'm feeling amazing.

And we start driving back.

And then it doesn't hit me how awful the loss was for like a week.

Like literally, because I'm just, my win was me getting him in the car seat, right?

So my new theory on this is that you should just be able to rent kids for high-leverage games.

Okay.

And then that's, you just take care of them.

And that way, you're not that focused on potential catastrophic life.

Like if the Bills make the Super Bowl, we need a station of kids.

Yeah, yeah.

Where it's like, hey, you actually have to watch this kid the entire game.

Yeah.

You feel fulfilled in some way.

I like that.

And then you don't, you know, if the Bills lose, we can, we can go from there.

It's not a bad idea.

Yeah, no, it's good.

But Cam Ward.

Oh, yeah, Cam Ward.

He said, but he said the offense was mid.

Yeah, but that's his thing.

That's his thing.

He's like.

Well, no, so Brandon was just talking about.

It's a pretty cool thing, I'll be honest.

Being a mid-quarterback is a great life.

It is.

So

there's two types of we suck.

There's like the Joe Burrow, like Joe Burrow a couple years ago was like, this is terrible.

And Jamar Chase, like, I can't catch the ball.

And then they made the Super Bowl that year.

And then there's like the we actually suck thing.

And you have to be able to tell the difference between the two.

Like

there's some places where, you know, like if Kellen Moore was like, this Saints team sucks, you'd be like, okay.

Oh, no.

But if like, if, if, if Baker Mayfield says it, it's like, no,

they're just in the process, right?

That Buck seems really good.

So, with Cam Moore, I think that's an expectation thing.

He knows how to run.

Like, the stories that came out of Miami last year were unbelievable.

Like, just from August.

He's a culture changer.

He makes everybody better.

He is so calm.

He's almost too calm in the pocket.

Yeah, he's standing flat-footed half the time.

Yeah, and just like throwing those little picks.

Like, I have a story.

I have a friend who was on the sideline for the Gator game.

And

the first drive of that game, they were, it was a touchdown to Cameron Cormick, the 27-year-old.

And he scored, and it was 7-0.

It was like 12 minutes to go in the game.

And one of the offensive coaches walked up to my buddy and was like, this game's over.

And he's like, what do you mean?

He's like, there's 90,000 people here.

The calmest guy in the stadium is the Miami quarterback.

Like, he's the only one whose hands aren't shaking.

He's the only one who's not doing stadium pull shit.

Like, he was just, it was the swamp.

It was August 31st.

And it was like he was in his living room just pouring coffee.

And I think that that translates to the NFL level.

He's not going to be rattled.

I think hopefully Calvin Ridley is healthy enough.

I don't know if his restraint board is going to make the team.

We'll see how that goes.

But I just think that, like Steve Young said this one time about Mahomes, I think about it all the time, where everybody gives him the credit.

for the Superman stuff, but nobody gives Mahomes the credit for the Clark Kent stuff.

And Cam Ward can do both those things.

He can just fire it into a tight end, or he can just run back and forth for five seconds until, as the aforementioned video game thing, someone comes open on.

Right, right.

So, like, I think he's going to be immediately good.

Okay.

What do you think about the Panthers this year?

Are we crazy?

Talk about the Panthers.

Decent.

We think they might go to the Super Bowl.

That might be crazy.

If you look at the stats, they play.

The stats do say they're going to go to Super Bowl.

They play every time they've played Jacksonville in opening week, I think.

Yeah, something like that.

They've gone to the Super Bowl.

And also, every year that Jennifer Lopez gets a divorce, they go to the Super Bowl.

That's

never lie.

That's rock solid.

But I do think Bernan Alex podcast.

I do think that

Bryce Young, he's gotten better.

He was great last year for the second half.

Or better.

Yeah, he was.

He was.

No, he was.

He wasn't.

Is that like the Caleb Williams cope?

Is that

he'll get better in his second year?

Yeah.

I mean, Bryce Young looks good.

Yeah, Dave Canalis is really good.

They need easy answers.

And I think that there's...

like the defense can be okay.

Like Dan Morgan, I think Dan Morgan's got a little Dan Campbell in him.

And they like he gets up there and he's like, we just want dogs, man.

We just want dogs.

But then you talk to him and it's like, oh, he actually, he gets it.

Like, there's a public persona and a private persona.

Like, he understands it.

And they have an analytics department that's really robust.

So I'm like long on them.

It seems like David Tepper

has kind of figured out how to trust his people now.

So I don't think it's crazy that they're going to be good.

I do think it's a little crazy.

Understanding the Jennifer Lopez thing.

I also left out that a point.

It's also the year after the Ohio State Buckeyes win the championship and they play Jacksonville week one and Jennifer Lopez gets a divorce.

That's all happening this year.

So the stars are truly lying for Carolina.

It's a good thought.

And with David Tepper, he is in the phase of new ownership.

I love watching owners like figure out how leagues work.

This is the phase where he's like, I have to be able to trust my football guys and not meddle.

And then once things start to go bad, then he's going to start meddling again.

And then two years from then, he'll be like, I've learned that I need to trust my guys and let them do their jobs.

So I think there's three types of owners.

There's owners that know how to win and want to win.

There's owners that don't know how to win and want to win.

And then there's owners that don't care either way.

And I think that the don't care either way

is not don't care either way, but like if they win, it's incidental.

They're never like, I'm going to die if we don't win 10 games.

It's a lot of the inheritance owners.

A lot of it, well, they're not cash.

Right, exactly.

They're like, hey, we got a good thing going.

If we get lightning in a bottle and go to the playoffs, right?

But

they're not going to move heaven and earth to win 14 games, which I think some of the the new owners are.

But also the thing they don't know how to win.

Like, I think there are some owners, like, Tepper is one of them.

If he didn't want to win, he wouldn't fire people all the time.

He would just be like, ah, Matt Rule, that's fine.

We'll just let you do your contract and figure it out later.

Like, he wants to win.

Yeah.

He doesn't know how to.

So then it's like, all right, hire Dan Morgan and Brantillas and Dave Canalis, and then just you guys do this, which is the best way to do it.

Yeah.

What about the New England Patriots?

Are you high on them?

I mean, I'm high on Vrabel as

an entity.

Yeah.

I think they still have a ways to go.

Like, I I think that the funny thing, like, I thought Drake May was really good, and I was really impressed with him

coming in, and I thought that what he showed last year, like with his legs, with just like being under assault, like he, he had the worst offensive line of football, and he still showed something, which you can't say about Caleb Williams.

And so

I was hugely impressed.

And I think that, like, have you guys met him before?

Drabel?

Drake May?

No.

Okay.

I don't think so.

He's like, he's got the right, he's got a guy franchise quarterback attitude.

He also told me, it's important.

Phillip Rivers trains him.

And he said that Phillip Rivers beats him in throwing contests all the time.

So Phillip still got it.

So I think that I'm mad at Kyle Shanahan.

I'm mad at Kyle Shanahan for leaking the story that if they had made the Super Bowl and they had no quarterback, that he would have called Phillip Rivers out of retirement to play in the Super Bowl.

I'm mad at him for saying that out loud because that's all I think about is how awesome that would have been

to put Phillip Rivers in there last minute.

How long

do you think we have where that would be a viable option for Phil Rivers?

For Philip Rivers?

Like, would you do it this year?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

If you make the Super Bowl and you're missing a quarterback, I still think you need to follow up Brett Favre.

Just get him out there.

Just one more time.

I think Favre might be tough.

Might be.

All right.

Since we talked about some of the teams that will surprise us, who is going to have the number one pick next year?

Who's the worst team in the NFL?

The Saints.

Saints?

Probably.

I just don't see a path to them winning.

The only thing about the Saints is that

they really like winning games.

Right.

They really like winning games.

And so if they get the first overall pick, it's going to be accidental.

Okay.

It's going to be accidental.

They're going to try to win games into December.

Like, the heartbeat of

the franchise, like the heartbeat of the city is through the franchise.

So I don't think they can be like, hey, let's be one in 16 this year.

Yeah.

I think the Giants are going to win enough games.

I mean, the Saints are by far the worst games.

What about,

I think Rodgers is going to be better than people think.

And I think the Steelers are going to be slightly better than people think.

Exactly.

I think they're going to win like nine to ten games.

Well, that's about that.

That's exactly what people think.

That's exactly what people think.

Winning record by Tom Warren.

Yeah.

So you think it's like 12, 13?

Maybe 11, 12.

I just think Rodgers, I think he has, he's got the sufficient chip on his shoulder again where it's like everyone was like, this guy should retire.

He stinks.

The Jets, the Jets saying to him, like, we do not want you, will make Aaron Rodgers good again.

But why wasn't he good?

Green Bay said, we don't want you.

Well, no, but he also didn't want Green Bay a little bit.

He was, though.

They drafted Jordan Love.

He wanted an MVP.

Right.

So they basically were like, hey,

they waited until they were done with him.

Yeah, no, but he was bad.

They drafted Jordan Love.

He got good again.

So he needs that little, hey, you stink enough of the doubters.

And then obviously.

This is like a renewable resource.

He can keep doing this forever.

Correct.

And obviously,

I do think the Achilles, like, you know, obviously it was such bullshit when he was like, I'm going to be back this year.

I think Achilles at that, we saw it with Kirk Cousins.

Like, it's probably more of like a 18-month, 24-month injury for a guy on the wrong side of 30.

Right.

So, I don't know.

I just, I feel like he's got one more year in him

because he's just the boogeyman that never dies.

And then the Steelers do have a good defense, and they just haven't had competent quarterback play in the last five years.

He changed the way he played last year.

He was, I think it was one of the shortest depth of targets he's ever had.

He's had a quick release.

He was getting rid of the

the ball really quickly.

And so I think he's a different guy than he was during his MVP years, obviously, but I don't think he's going to sit stand back there and just wait for magic to happen.

So I think that the ceiling is a little lower, but the floor is high.

He knows where to put the ball.

Like we've seen that before with older quarterbacks.

They know how to put where to put the ball.

And his arm is still good.

Like I do think his arm is still good.

I think it's the mobility that's.

Right, but what is it without mobility?

Yeah, of course.

You go from MVP to just pretty good.

So I think he's going to be like the 15th best quarterback in their win 10 games.

15th best would be good for the Steelers.

Yeah.

They haven't had the 15th best quarterback in a long time.

Better question is, are they going to win a playoff game?

No.

Okay.

So make the playoffs, rinse and repeat.

Same shit.

Same deal, but with Aaron Rodgers.

Okay.

All right.

What about week one?

Is Kirk Cousins an Atlanta Falcon?

Yeah, I think so.

I don't know what they're doing.

So like

the Falcons to me

seem to be their entire the premise of their entire organization is that Michael Pennix is the best quarterback of all time Like he's the guy that's like well We got to draft a quarterback even though we signed a guy with like 60 million dollars guarantees We got trade up a first round pick next year for my for for James Pierce

The whole thing is like is the whole boat or the whole the whole plane is made out of Michael Pennix, right?

And so

I don't understand a lot of what they've done over the past 18 months

but

they said my the Kirk Cousins is going to be a backup and I kind of believe them.

Like they gave him the roster bonus.

Like they're really committed to the bit.

They're really committed.

They gave him like a huge roster bonus, paying him all this money.

Nobody believed them that he was going to be the backup, but then they keep putting their money where their mouth is and he's the backup.

Yeah.

No, you're right.

It's the entire premise.

It's a house of cards and it's built on the only way you operate in that scenario where you draft Michael Pinnix in the top 10 is if you truly believe he's the best quarterback that's in like the next three or four drafts.

Yes.

And they did it.

They did it.

And I don't know if he is.

That's the thing.

I don't know.

I don't, but he might be.

That's the thing.

I just don't know.

He played like three games.

What would you want to see from Michael Pennix this year to be like the Falcons did the right thing?

I'm an idiot.

So a couple people have said he's like an elite deep passer.

I mean, we saw that at Washington, right?

But like, I would like to see just like huge chunk plays this year, just a proof of concept.

I saw that their offensive coordinator studying 2023 Washington liked to see the offense a little bit more because it was really, really fun.

I'll just throw it up to Roma Dunze and good things were happening.

And Jalen Polk and Jalen McMillan and all those guys, like, that was really fun.

So, I could do, like, spread it out, just throw the ball down the field, Bijan, Kyle Pitts.

I said, unlock Kyle Pitts.

Yeah, if you can't get it,

Kyle Pitts gets unlocked.

12 touchdowns this year.

I'd say good choice with Michael Pennix.

That's what it finally took.

I'm taking the under.

I'd agree with that.

All right.

I got one last question.

It's been awesome, Kevin.

We'll definitely have you back on during the season.

Everyone, check.

You're all over the place.

Do you have any big, big things coming up?

So, you obviously, if you're showing up.

The Omaha thing

that'll be on ESPN too and ESPN News all

season.

We don't have any big things coming up.

Not really.

It's going to be on Get Up.

Get Up, first take, NFL Live probably

going forward.

And that's basically it.

I don't have much to plug.

This is football rigging for your pods and it's on TV and all that stuff.

Omaha production.

I love it.

All right.

So my last question, Roback Question, RHO, B-A-C-K.com, promo code take.

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Give us your championship game game and Super Bowl and winner.

All right, so

I've been saying all offseason it's going to be Ravens, Rams.

Okay.

Ravens beat the Rams.

Ravens beat the Rams.

My concern is Matthew Stafford's back.

Week to week is not what I want to hear.

No.

That's not what I want to hear.

No.

So

with the caveat that if Stafford's back isn't healthy, I would go with the Eagles.

Okay.

I'm sure that's a cop out, but like, we can't be doing week to week.

He's only, you know, he's 37 or whatever.

Right.

So there's that.

Championship game, go Rams, Eagles.

Commanders are really good.

I want to pick them.

I just can't.

Sorry, buddy.

No, I hear you.

And then Bears, I'm not.

I'm not going to be able to do that.

Well, I didn't expect you.

AFC,

I'm going to go Ravens-Bills.

Okay.

Just a classic.

I was going to say Bronx.

Just a classic.

That's another.

The Ravens-Bills would be a rent-a-kid situation.

Oh, man.

Seriously.

Seriously.

Well, I'm excited because football is about to be back.

So I love love it.

There's nothing better.

Oh, give us a win total for the Miami Hurricanes.

Two losses.

So they open with Notre Dame.

Then they have Florida on the third or fourth week of the season, fourth week of the season.

They'll split those.

And then they got the ACC.

They got the ACC.

Two November games on the road at Pitt and at Virginia Tech.

Pat Narduzzi would love nothing more than just an annoying

four-turnover, a couple fumbles, probably a night game in Pitt.

I'll probably be there.

My son's probably rattled as hell.

Like,

I could see that being the second loss.

Okay.

Yeah.

Stephen A.

Smith is going to be shocked week one when you're like, I'm actually on the convicts.

All right.

Well, Kevin, awesome time having you here.

Thanks for coming in.

Good luck on the rest of the trip.

And let Dan Campbell know, like, give him, give him the chip.

I will.

Here you go.

I said you can't even drive a car without Ben Johnson and Aaron Glenn.

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Oh, no.

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And now, here is AJ Brown.

Okay, we now welcome on a very, very, very special guest, Super Bowl champion,

two-time all-pro.

It is AJ Brown from the three-time all-pro?

My bad.

Already bad.

I thought it was three Pro Bowls, two-time all-pro, three-time all-pro, Super Bowl champion, AJ Brown from the Philadelphia Eagles.

It is our grit week presented by, hey, dudes, we start every interview the same.

What does the word grit mean to you?

It's pushing past

a point where

you, your brain, or anyone else thinks you can go.

I like that.

I like that.

Have you had that?

How often does that come up in an NFL season where you're like, I'm at the limit right now, but I got to dig deep and go past that?

A few times, late in the season, especially when your body

doesn't want to respond the way you want it to.

And you just

keep going.

You just, you know, just find a way to

get through it.

Yeah.

And believe it or not, those are some of my best days.

Really?

Yeah.

Okay.

What's an example of that?

Playing hurt the back half of the season.

Get my knee drained

twice a week.

Get my knee drained right before the game, watching the game, go out there and have a good performance.

Then the following week, the following week, the following week, and

even the Super Bowl, right before the Super Bowl.

How you feel now?

Ready to go.

Pretty good?

Is camp hard?

Absolutely.

Does it get any easier?

I don't know, man.

I don't know.

You know,

we had some tough, like, the past two days were very tough.

You know, you know, Nick always say it takes what it takes.

You know, us joking with him is like saying.

It's going to take all of us out.

You keep on going at this rate.

But

it's been tough, though.

It's cool, though.

Yeah.

Yeah.

By the way,

I don't know if this is a good thing or a bad thing, but it's a good thing for you.

Have you seen the completion of the trade from Tennessee to Philadelphia?

Might be the best trade the Eagles have ever made.

And because they got you and everything you've done, does that feel at least good to be in like I they took a chance on me, they got me, and I basically overperformed to like an insane level in terms of the return?

Yeah,

you know, I'm grateful that happened.

And

I like to say like, you know, I grew that situation in Tennessee.

You know, I'm glad this happened because I feel like I was meant to shine.

And this, we needed a big team with a big market, you know, and I and I think this is the right place and the best fit for me.

You know, I am a little sad, you know, for Traylon Burks.

You know, I wish he could, you know, get healthy because he's a good kid and I and I talked to him numerous of times.

I got his number.

And it just sucks to see it go down like that.

Yeah.

Yeah, but

so.

Yeah.

Was there an adjustment period just living in Philadelphia?

Living in the Northeast for the first time?

The weather.

Yeah.

Honestly, the weather.

You know, it gets really cold here.

And

I wish it was kind of cold now.

It's so hot outside.

It is.

Yeah.

It's so hot outside.

You're from Starkville, right?

Yeah, from Starkville.

But he went to Ole Miss.

Yeah.

What was that like?

Were people in Starkville mad?

Oh, absolutely.

I was getting death threats.

Really?

Really?

It was serious.

And I didn't really take it seriously.

My dad, you know,

took it very seriously.

But, you know, I was just a kid, just getting ready to play football and just kind of breast it off.

Was it between the two?

It was between Alabama and Ole Miss.

Oh, so Mississippi State was never even in the rock.

So they can't even be mad.

Yeah, but they just expected me to go there.

Right.

So when I closed out the recruiting, I remember telling Dan Mullen, saying, I don't want to,

you no longer can recruit me.

I don't want to, I'm not coming here.

And that's when it just kind of started to like, oh, shoot, like, look what we done.

We done messed up.

And,

shoot, long story short, you know, I had this, I had this challenger, white and white challenger with a red stripe.

Everybody knew it was me.

I had the license plate 1K.

And, shoot, I was getting followed.

People taking pictures of my car, posting it online.

And I didn't even know it.

I'm aware.

And my dad was like, oh, this is serious.

Yeah.

So you're 17 years old, and you're having people follow you around.

Yeah, in Starkville.

Damn, that's messed up.

Was it Brandon Walker?

Brandon Walker did.

We might know who did that.

Yeah.

We probably do.

We could probably get him around.

I'll beat the shit out out of him for that.

What?

We know exactly who did it.

I got a dumb question for you, but I feel like this

had to have something to do with it.

How much was it the Jersey colors to be like Ole Miss over Mississippi State or Alabama even?

Mississippi State doesn't have the best jerseys.

No, they don't.

And they are Adidas, too.

Yeah.

I'm not an Adidas fan.

Okay.

I'm not throwing a shot at Adidas, but I'm not an Adidas fan.

The Cleates.

That's a shot at Adidas.

Yeah, that's fine.

That's fine.

But let's be honest, I decided not to go to the scoop because of their shoes.

But the color just stinks.

I mean,

I would just prefer, you know, Nikes, you know, and, but I will tell you this, though.

I didn't choose Georgia because I got recruited from Georgia.

I didn't choose Georgia because I don't like wearing black socks.

Oh.

Yeah,

that may be crazy, but I hate wearing black socks.

No, I think people don't ever put in like a 17-year-old.

Obviously, there's, you know, whether you're being close to home or like the coaching staff, but I feel like, I mean, you played the game online, you played the video game, like like jersey combinations do matter a little bit it absolutely does because putting on black socks with black cleats is just so it's slow it's so hideous it's slow because when i put on white i feel so fast it's so smooth like it's just something about it what are your fastest cleats because it non-white cleats your fastest cleats because i have an answer i don't know if you have the same answer

the fastest cleats uh I don't know, something white.

It doesn't matter.

No, you had these like neon green ones that looked so fast.

I literally remember against Tampa.

It might have been.

I was just like, this is the fastest anyone's ever looked.

The NFL said, take those off.

Okay.

Yeah, because you were too fast.

That's exactly why.

They were like, those cleats can't be legal.

Did you used to play like NBA Jam when you go turbo mode, your shoes glow?

That's what they were.

They're like, that's not allowed.

So are you faster in Eagles' colors than you were in Titans' colors?

Oh, I mean, I am faster now, so you can say that.

The colors have anything to do with it?

No, because I did like the proud blue uniforms.

I loved it.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Those are nice.

Those are nice.

Big story.

Obviously, you guys win the Super Bowl, but one of the big stories for you this year was reading a book on the sideline, Inter Excellence.

When that happened, were you like, this is insane that it's blown up like this and everyone's going crazy?

Yeah.

They came and talked to me in the locker room and said, hey, they got you on the sideline reading a book.

And I'm like, okay, but I do it every week.

It's like, nah,

this is big time, it's time.

And

it just blew up.

And obviously you know I had great intentions behind it I wasn't seeking attention or anything but you know I'm glad it changed his life you know because you know I from from what we discussed you know from just the hearing just how the book just the sales started to go crazy you know I'm happy that it changed someone's life in the future and you also have a literacy foundation which is doing great work

so what tell me about that because I got I got a pitch for you after that

I have so many ideas I don't want to really get onto it we can talk about it after okay off cameras but you're helping you know kids learn how to read and absolutely you know my my foundation and uh is based on mentorship and giving back and doing stuff like that and then and that's something i'm proud of too because it's i i when i grew up i didn't used to like to read i didn't like to read and so as i got older i started to learn more and and to stop being on my phone so much because social media, I feel like my brain fries.

You know, I have to look at it for so long and it's like I'm looking at stupid stuff, you know, and I just wanted to push myself and educate myself in different areas and different ways.

Okay.

All right.

So here's my pitch.

We're writing a book right now.

Okay.

10-year anniversary of this podcast coming out next year.

What if you write a chapter in the book?

So there's less work for us.

And then

everyone in your literacy foundation has to read our books.

You got to buy a lot of them too.

But you get to write a chapter.

Thoughts?

It's pretty good, pretty good deal.

Think about all the kids that are going to be dealing with.

We might be a New York Times bestseller.

You can then say you're a New York Times bestseller.

Or, okay.

I could just wait until my book comes out.

That's what it is.

I do know.

We'll write a chapter in your book.

Yeah, we'll put a chapter in your book.

Okay.

We'll do a home and home.

All right.

All right.

It's like a home and home in college football.

We want, you're going to come and you're going to do our book in 2026, and we'll do your book in like 2035.

We'll go visit your place.

My book is going to come out sooner.

Okay, all right.

When's your book coming out?

I don't know yet, but it's way sooner than 2035.

What's your book about?

Myself.

Okay.

Okay.

You can plagiarize half our book if you need contributions.

Once it's written, it's...

I like the idea, though.

Okay.

All right.

We can work out.

Do the kids want a chapter about Coach K in your book?

Coach K?

Yeah.

They can take that chapter for them.

Yeah.

He's a scumbag.

That's what I'm going to write.

All right.

Yeah.

I don't know what's going on.

All right.

Are you reading anything right now?

Am I reading it?

Nothing other than the Bible right now.

Okay.

You look like you're actually going through the Bible.

Are you going in order?

No.

So I read the Gospels already, and I got this study Bible that I use.

So I just read 1 Corinthians, 2 Corinthians, and I'm in Galatians right now.

So sometimes I reread books of the Bible, but, you know, so.

Are you a highlighter guy?

Do you like see things?

I do.

And then you try to

take whatever you've highlighted, whether it's the Bible or, you know, what you read on the sideline, inner excellence, and then try to apply that in your day-to-day.

Absolutely.

That's something that like highlighting always helped me, especially with the Bible.

But whenever I'm reading a book, it's just something that I always want to go back to.

Like inner excellence, I had highlighted stuff that I just could flip to, and then it just sparked my interest.

But reading the Bible is kind of a little different.

So, with Inner Excellence, in particular, was there something that you took from that book that you just straight up applied to how you go about your day-to-day?

I applied it to my process on the field.

So

yeah.

Yeah.

I don't think people talk enough about the fact that you got drafted in MLB as well.

So were you ever thinking about like being a baseball player and do you miss it?

I miss it at times.

I watched a couple videos of me hitting the other day on my phone.

Okay.

And just the sound of the bat, it's a different type of feeling.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And

I do miss it.

Did I consider it

when I was like

17 or 18 years old?

Not so much because I started to fall in love with football.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And it's just football just took over.

Yeah.

Yeah.

What position did you play?

Center field.

Okay.

No, you must have had insane range.

Yeah.

And then how were you hitting your senior year high school?

I did really well.

I bet it like above like 300.

Okay.

But it's high school, though.

But it's still like impressive to be drafted into sports.

That's not, you know, to be that good to be drafted out of high school in the MLB and obviously be a high draft pick in the NFL.

Yeah, and then I went to Ole Miss and I signed the contract, obviously, just for money reasons.

With the MLB team.

With the MLB team.

Who was it?

The Padre.

Okay.

Yeah.

And

got the signer bonus because it's there for me.

Right.

Why win?

Right.

And so I did that.

And I went to Arizona for like rookie ball.

And I'm out there practicing with the team and everything.

And and I felt like I was the

left one out, you know, and everybody speaks Spanish.

I didn't speak Spanish, I didn't know any Spanish.

And

the whole team, it was just, you know, more Dominicans and everything.

So it was just, it was tough.

Yeah.

It was tough.

And I was, I was ready to go.

You're a young kid.

Yeah, I was ready to go.

And you falling in love with football.

I fall in love with football.

Yeah.

I just wanted to get back to old mist as soon as I could.

It was cool that you actually tried it.

Yeah.

You know, because you got paid.

Yeah.

And I got paid.

Right.

If you never tried it you'd probably there'd be a small part of you being like man what if what if i had tried that do you remember when you fell in love with football

yes actually was there a moment yep what was that um i was playing against west point

uh my junior year i had four catches for four touchdowns to 205 yards every time i touched the ball score

and uh

that moment

joking joking about it with my father because he would say if Nick Sabin ever comes like you're going to alabama right and we would always joke about it and i was like no i'm not going to alabama and he was like well i'm going to knock you out and you're going to wake up in alabama

and funny long story short nick saben came like after that game and that's when it was real for me and i was like oh i really can play this game and uh my dad was like you're going to alabama yeah

i said i'm still not going to alabama but i'm going to pursue this football thing yeah and it just took off yeah what was the final score of that game?

I don't remember.

You beat him.

Yeah, we beat him.

Beat West Point.

Pretty bad.

Yeah.

Yeah.

That's pretty good.

That's for Brendan Walker, that guy that tried to follow you.

That's also why people.

Who is this guy?

Yeah, no, he probably falls.

You have to beat West Point.

He was double mad at you for that.

I'm actually a booster at West Point.

I helped fund their state championship ranks.

Is this a made-up character?

No,

he's too real.

Trust me.

I wish he was made-up sometimes.

Yeah.

Okay.

But now it all makes sense.

Dots are coming to you.

You said four touchdowns?

Four touchdowns.

Four touchdowns.

West Point's eye.

Woo.

And they call themselves Point City?

Yeah.

You were Point City enough.

Okay.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Damn.

I'm going to look up this Brandon Walker.

Don't, don't.

Don't.

You'll get put on the list.

We did ask Lane and Cam, and I'll ask you the same question.

What week this year do you think Nick Siriani would be on the hot seat from the fan base?

Obviously, I'm going to say we're going to win.

Yeah.

But you know, like one loss and guys like that right there, are going to say somehow,

somehow lose the first game of the season.

It is up for Nick Seri Young.

You're not wrong.

It is up.

It is up.

Cowboys.

There will be a fan who will be like, I don't care that he just won a Super Bowl.

They're going to call in to Wilp.

Yeah.

And it's going to spark like a wildfire.

He's a palm.

This guy's a fraud.

We're Super Bowl champion head coach.

Like,

this place is so unique, and it can be positive.

And most, most importantly, it can be very negative so quickly.

Like, someone can call into a radio show and say the most bizarre thing, and now all the pages on each platform who have very big platforms, and they're just going to run with it.

And now it's a whole nother story, and then it gets to the national media, and then it's up.

Yeah.

Do they react when you go on Twitter and you put out

some theories about how many days are in a year.

Do you remember that?

Because when you said this, I think I believe you.

Okay.

I think I believe you.

You said the full year consists of 365.25 days.

These are then designated 12 calendar months.

However, there are 13 lunar months of 28-day cycles, which are not titled.

Each year, the 0.25 of a day is accumulated, making one full day every four years.

This is designated as a leap year, and the extra day is tacked on to the end of February, which normally has only 28 days.

Remaining months, I mean, this is all real, all true.

The remaining months are allocated either 30 or 31 days.

I understand that if you were old enough to originate the question and are literate, you'll already know this and just like wasting time.

So, how many days are in your year?

In my year?

Yeah.

First of all, I did not tweet that.

That was not you?

Oh, no.

Who tweeted that?

I would never tweet that long.

All right, but I do believe some of that stuff.

Okay, yeah, yeah.

I do believe some of that stuff.

You know, I think time is relative, honestly.

Yeah.

Einstein said that.

I don't know.

I don't.

It's a safe space.

It's not.

I would pay a million dollars.

Whatever you say next is going to get clipped.

Man.

I'm the kid, honestly, because I know this by the clip.

I'm the kid

as I as I grown up,

I'm 28 years old now, I'll say like three or four years ago, maybe even before then, I started to question what's being taught to us,

right?

And if you question what's being taught to us in today's world, you are crazy, something's wrong with you, whatever, right?

But my question is, who put who in charge to teach us these things such as that's a black table?

Right.

And to me, that could be a white table.

You'd be wrong.

Well, how would I be wrong?

That's your definition of black and white.

Okay, yeah, yeah.

That's what you need to do with your cleats.

Hold on.

Hold on.

Dude, you got to tell Goodell these aren't these aren't beyond green.

They're white.

Listen, though.

Listen, though.

We've been taught, we go to school, they teach us, they put us in place, and they teach us all this, all these things, right?

They teach us about history they teach about everything right

who put them in charge to say this is correct and we have to learn this right

like

that

may be red to me i think you're colorblind i'm not colorblind okay i'm not i'm not colorblind but i'm i'm just using this as yeah no healthy skeptic skepticism is a good thing you know yeah and so like

all right the moon landing yeah let's talk about stuff like that right yeah yeah

i mean we were in the middle of the Cold War.

We had to beat Russia, right?

Like USSR, the evil empire.

We had to flex our muscles.

They put that sputnik up in the sky.

We're like, fuck, we got to do something to just get in their heads.

Okay, Stanley Kubrick, I'm going to fly you out to Las Vegas.

Let's film this shit.

Think about this.

Think about this.

Well,

we should have you back on because we could talk about all this stuff.

I got one last question.

It's a roback question, R-H-O-B-A-C.com, promo code take.

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This has been awesome, AJ.

We really appreciate it.

A lot of fun.

Zach, we've been telling him he's going to get a question all day.

Zach, you got a question for AJ.

I got a quick question if that's cool to you, man.

After six seasons in the NFL,

if you could, you know, working on yourself, growing as a player, not only as a player, but as a man, kind of gaining experience, if you could go back to draft night and give yourself one piece of advice, would you do that?

And if so, like, what would it be?

Oh, good question.

I would tell

myself

to not be hard on myself.

You know,

looking back,

because I actually did this yesterday.

Looking back, I was watching some videos of myself and watching some highlights.

And everything I wanted when I was young, I have now.

And the 28-year-old me wants more, right?

Because I'm always searching for the next thing.

But

I would tell the younger me just to be present and enjoy each and every day.

Each and every day.

Because it's different seasons that I go through, that you're going to go through in this league.

And you have to learn to navigate through them.

And

I just wanted so much, so much, so much so soon.

And sometimes I sped up that process by overthinking too much and put more pressure on myself.

Me now,

I just want to have fun.

I just want to enjoy the moment, enjoy enjoy my teammates, enjoy the process,

and just have fun and make the most of every single opportunity.

And I haven't got relaxed, but I'm just finding ways to be present in this moment, even like this interview.

Just enjoying myself, being present.

And so.

Great question.

That's great advice.

I just think that the whole concept of like making it or

finally getting there is it teaches us some of the wrong stuff sometimes.

Yeah.

Like you always think, I'll be fine I'm gonna once once I make it

yeah once once I get this then it's the finished line and then that's that's it and then once you accomplish those goals you have for yourself you realize well I still feel the same as I did before I got there and that's when I think a lot of people start to realize take joy in the process of getting there and just in everything that you do yeah right yeah well AJ yeah this has been awesome man really appreciate it We'd love to have you back on anytime, maybe getting some conspiracy theories.

Yeah.

It'd be fun.

Let's talk about about it.

Until we get a restraining order on Brandon Walker.

We can do it all.

Let's talk about it.

Best of luck this year, man.

Thank you.

Thank y'all.

A.J.

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Okay, let's finish up guys on chicks.

Henry.

Yes.

Hey, I have a question.

PFT.

In the graphic that memes tweeted out for this guys on chicks, who is that guy?

Should I know that guy?

Chole.

That guy?

Yeah.

He was in a video at DJ's.

Yeah.

Okay.

He's in a due variant.

Okay, got it.

I was not familiar with his game.

Yeah.

It's the Rizzler's uncle.

Or the Spider- Where Rizzler would have been been so?

Washington.

Oh, yeah.

That was awesome.

Hey, guys.

I've listened to a lot of your podcasts in the car against my will.

Parentheses, unnecessary parentheses.

My boyfriend keeps peeing in the sink, not just after a few beers, every single day.

His excuse, it's elite clock management.

Yep.

Because the sink is closer than the toilet.

He says all great QBs make quick reads and that you have to take the easy

Mountain Duberb.

Take the easy completion.

Last night, he legit called it a two-minute drill and fist pumped when he finished putting ramen in the microwave, then ran upstairs to pee.

Then backed

upstairs.

There's got to be a bathroom downstairs.

There's a sink downstairs.

Wait, did he run upstairs to the bathroom and then pee in the bathroom sink?

That's what it sounds like.

That's okay, then back down before the microwave hit zero.

He even brags about his accuracy under pressure when I'm brushing my teeth right next to him.

Yeah.

I feel like the sink is kitchen kitchen sink.

Yeah.

Like, why would you pee in a bathroom sink?

I do pee in the bathroom sink every now and then.

That's

hold on, hear me out.

It's when I'm on the road and I don't want to turn on the lights and I don't know where everything is.

Like I'm in a hotel room.

And the sink's easier to find than the toilet?

Yeah.

Or sometimes I'll do it in the shower.

So I'll do that sometimes.

I'll just open up a shower curtain and just pee right down.

Because I just don't want, I don't want to wake up.

Yeah.

Peeing in the bathtub is way easier.

You're a huge target.

So you're saying you're in the bathroom, which is very small.

Well, sometimes you're in a bigger bathroom.

There's usually a sink.

But sometimes there's like

sometimes another door for the toilet, you know, when it's a glass door for the toilet.

Yeah.

And it gets even darker in there.

And sometimes

you don't judge.

You have the sink

in a completely separate room that's not even the bathroom.

Right.

It's kind of in the living room.

Yeah.

And it's not in that one.

That one we last one

had that.

Yep.

No, that's actually not.

That's the opposite of rich.

When the sink is in another hotel.

Yeah, that's a low-class hotel.

Yeah, that's literally a low-class hotel.

In the living room, pretty much.

It's like there's a sink, like a microwave, and then there's just like a toilet with a shower.

That one I can, yeah.

That's

the sink is right next to your bed.

Yeah, that's as low-class as a hotel room can get.

Yeah, I'd pee in that one.

Yeah.

I think peeing in a sink in a bathroom is crazy.

I usually do my peeing in the

kitchen sink after doing the dishes is a reward for myself.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah, after you do the dishes.

Right.

Yeah.

I do the dishes, then I pee, then I just do a little more soap.

Done.

When I let Blake out at night into the backyard to go pee, I usually just go out with him.

Oh, definitely.

And we pee outside, anywhere outside.

We pee at the same time.

And it's the greatest bonding experience you can have with this guy.

No, anywhere outside.

That's, you know,

perks of being a guy.

Facts.

Sup, boys, and our sweet Prince Zach.

Later this month, my husband will travel to an Airbnb in the mountains for three nights of our four-fantasy draft.

They draft on Saturday morning.

Whoa.

But go up to essentially play golf, drink heavily, and fuck around all weekend.

Yeah.

This has been going on for 15 years since they were 16.

Don't tell the cops.

He is more excited for this weekend and has helped plan way more of it than our daughter's first birthday, which is upcoming this weekend.

Should I be mad or is it just normal behavior?

Fantasy drafts, they kind of replace bachelor parties.

Once you stop going on them, a lot of guys are just like, they need an excuse to just get out there with boys.

Also,

fuck off with first birthday parties.

That's for you.

For my kids,

my oldest,

we did them all.

And then as my second and third, we started being like, we're not doing a real birthday party until

four,

three or four.

Like, yeah, okay.

But they can pick what they want where they're going.

Yeah, right.

And when they have friends,

they don't have friends when they're one.

They don't.

So

a one-year-old's birthday party is pizza and cupcakes.

That's it.

That's all you need to do.

You take a picture, light a candle.

They're going to probably burn themselves.

That's it.

In and out.

So, no, he's correct.

If it was your kid's 10th birthday party, I'd be like, yeah, that's kind of fucked up.

Like, get in the mix.

And it's going to be some planning.

It's going to be this time of year in the future.

But the first birthday party.

First and second.

Yeah.

First and second, they won't remember.

No one remembers their second birthday party.

It was my nephew's first birthday party about a month ago.

I go down there and I'm like, I'm going to be a cool uncle.

I know he likes like banging on the piano that he's got.

So I got him like a plastic plastic ukulele and I was like, this will be fine.

He can drop it, throw it around.

He'll just like mess with the strings.

I bring it into the house and I'm like, here's your first birthday present.

And then I see he has three other ukulele already.

Now he has four ukulele.

Oh, dude, we double up on trucks.

Four ukulele.

That's so many ukulele to have.

And Max couldn't even get me one from Hawaii.

Yeah.

That's fucked up.

Yeah, no, that was fucked up.

He's got four.

That's fucked up.

Just get a truck next time.

Yeah.

Any truck.

Does he want El Camino?

Yeah.

If now giving to three people.

Yeah.

Well, Well, no, I gave it to Jaden so that Max wouldn't get his paws on it.

Yeah.

No, you have to get.

That means you just have to buy another El Camino.

No, it doesn't.

No, it doesn't.

No, it doesn't.

It does.

You're a liar.

First birthday party, though, is whack.

So you have no right to be upset.

As long as he attends.

Take the picture.

You could even do it on the wrong day.

Like, that's the kind of stuff I forgot.

Like, I think when my son started, like, preschool, we forgot to take a picture the first day.

We just did it the second day.

Yeah.

We'll never know.

Who cares?

This one is in the same vein, but I feel like there is a huge

fantasy draft is easier to sell.

Uh, every year, my boyfriend takes a trip with his friends to a casino to watch the first four days of March Madness.

Yep, this March, they want to go to Scottsdale and we live in Texas.

He wants to fly out on a one-day trip there to scope out the venue to make sure the setup is to their liking.

Yep, why does he think this gigantic waste of money is okay?

Uh, he has to scope it out.

That where your seating arrangement for March Madness is very important,

very important.

Oh, did I tell you guys my idea?

So

Saturday night, Eddie had his black block party, and

we hired the Billy Joel impersonator.

It was great vibes.

I think for March Madness, I'm going to hire him and put him in a room.

And when you have a bad beat, you can just be like piano man.

He just sits in there for like four days.

We just pay him a retainer.

Zero content can be made.

Yeah, I mean, we could have a video on it.

We can't obviously do audio.

But you can like I owe a silent video of you sitting there just like doing a one-man concert.

Like, think about the vibes.

Be like, oh, man, I just got my heart ripped out.

I need some scenes from an Italian restaurant.

Max would love that.

It would be great.

You're in, right?

No, you're in.

It's going to cost a lot of money, but I think it's a good, yeah, like, just an on-demand Billy Joel for all of March Madness.

Yeah, just think of the visuals of us just like, we could probably do it in this studio, and then it is cut to you just sitting there one-on-one concert with the dude.

I think the audio would be a big part of that.

I think it's even funnier with no audio.

Yeah.

Just like a security cam feed.

Yeah, right.

Of you just

an interrogation room, except it's you sitting in front of Billy Jordan.

Yeah.

And you're singing piano man with him.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Good vibes.

Just an idea.

Okay.

I like it.

Yeah, just like a white room.

Yeah.

Like a, well, that'd be bad for him, I guess.

All right.

Yeah, we got it.

Yeah,

he's got to be comfortable.

Hey, fellas, hope all is well.

My boyfriend is a huge sports fan,

especially college basketball.

I'm not that big of a a sports fan, but went to a large university and he went to a smaller mid-major.

He grew up hating the school that I went to and still claims to this day that he would rather die a gruesome death

than cheer for my school.

It's so bad, he won't even wear the same color blue as my school.

Yep, and our talks about the future.

Duke is not a Duke's school, though.

No, he didn't go to Duke.

He went to a mid-major.

She went to a major.

She said she went to a big school.

So probably UNCG.

I think she went to UNC.

Okay.

This kid is a fan of Duke.

Duke.

Got it.

But went to a men-major because he couldn't get into Duke.

Got it.

Okay.

I mean, same color blue has got to be.

Yeah, yeah.

It's got to be.

And it's college basketball.

Yeah.

Maybe Kansas.

In our talks about the future and children, this is something that I brought up.

He said that our future children cannot be fans of both because he can't stand the thought of producing fans of my school.

Is he being ridiculous?

Thanks.

Not ridiculous, but UNC's colors are a lot better.

So you're kind of fucked.

If it is UNC, you got to let it happen.

Yeah.

Yeah.

If it's Kentucky.

Also, all Duke fans that didn't go to Duke are.

Yeah.

Well, it depends if they're rivals, too.

Like, if this is Duke UNC,

I'm including you.

If Duke UNC, that's tricky.

If it's like a Kansas or a Kentucky and.

I could have went to Duke.

How?

Go and take a visit?

You can go visit.

Worked there?

Yeah.

I have one friend that is going to be listening to this.

I'm very mad that I just said that.

Good.

Fuck him.

Maybe, maybe this person went to Kentucky, the major school, and then the other person went to Creighton, the mid-major school.

I just love saying that.

Here's a little tip:

it's not that serious.

Your kids are just going to do whatever.

They might not even like sports.

I don't think it's that.

I think this kid's being a little bit of a hardo.

You do have to, if you've got rivals that are baked in, you have to establish which teams the kid roots for.

You have to bargain that.

I'll give you football.

Yeah, Kate and Beave.

Kate got.

I think Kate got Phillies.

Yeah, Kate got Phillies.

The Beeve got the commanders.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Tough.

It's a good trade.

Well, I guess the Eagles would have been.

Yeah.

Actually, yeah.

Listen.

Okay.

You never know.

Great show, boys.

Great show.

Let's finish with number three.

I got it.

Oh, I think I got it.

I think memes had it.

Go check it.

I think it was memes by

22.

I'm here.

I'm going to go with 40.

I'm going to go with 60 if I don't have three.

45.

I got you.

Bye.

Definitely make it.

All right, 60.

Great.

Definitely me.

60.

That was what you guessed last time, right?

Yep.

All right.

Perfect.

44.

Shout out, Bill.

85.

99 Pug.

What?

I like 85.

Why me?

I'd like 50.

I got 85.

13.

I get so mad every time.

44.

44?

Were you PFT?

45.

You can't take 99.

You got Hank?

2-2.

Well, you take

84.

34.

34.

34.

It's going to be pissed.

Oh.

Oh, thank God it wasn't.

Yeah, sorry for anyone who thought it was 84.

My bad.

My dad wanted me to take 84, too.

That might be that.

Oh, that would suck.

Great.

So your dad got it.

No, it was 34.

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