Caleb Williams, Hard Knocks Episode 3, Mt Rushmore Of Things That Are Hard To Explain

Speaker 1 Hey, pardon my take, listeners. You can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube.
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Speaker 1 On today's part of my take, we have a very special guest, QB1 of the Chicago Bears, Caleb Williams. We're up at Hallis Hall.
Hard knocks. Yeah, we're going to talk some hard knocks.

Speaker 1 We made our hard knocks debut.

Speaker 1 It was very, very cool. Tell everyone about the experience.

Speaker 1 We have the Mount Rushmore of things that are hard to explain. We also have Hot Seat, Cool Throne, and Guys on Chicks.
Great show for everyone. We're at camp.
We're up in the Northwoods of Wisconsin.

Speaker 1 When Cool, Creamy Ranch meets tangy, bold buffalo, the whole is greater than the sum of its sauce. Say howdy, partner, to new Buffalo Ranch sauce only at McDonald's for a limited time.

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Speaker 1 Okay, let's go.

Speaker 1 No place to hang out or washing.

Speaker 1 And then I can't blame all on the sun. Oh no, we're gonna rock it down to Electric Avenue.

Speaker 1 And then we'll take it higher.

Speaker 1 Oh, we're gonna rock it down to easy. Part of my take

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Speaker 1 Welcome to Part of My Take. Today is Wednesday, August 21st, and it's presented by DraftKings.
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Speaker 1 And boys, that's the best episode of Hard Knocks I've ever seen. Hard knocks.
We made it. That was really fucking cool.
It was. It was pretty awesome.
Almost didn't happen for me.

Speaker 1 I forgot to sign the release until like three hours before the actual airing of the episode. Of course.
I'm bad with paperwork. That's a theme on this podcast.
But yeah, it was cool.

Speaker 1 It was kind of surreal. Myself, Big Cat, Max, and Memes were all on hard knocks.

Speaker 1 Pretty much the whole squad was was on hard knocks. Yeah, had a blast doing it.
And I think that they took

Speaker 1 a fair representation of what the interview is encapsulated into hard knocks. Yeah, so it was very cool.

Speaker 1 We always, we had our interview planned with Caleb Williams last Tuesday,

Speaker 1 and we went up to Hallis Hall and we're like, maybe there's a chance like we get seen in the background at Hard Knocks.

Speaker 1 Turns out the majority of the Hard Knocks film crew is fans of ours and we're fans of them. And they were the coolest dudes ever.
They're like, Hey, do you mind if we like punch into your sound?

Speaker 1 And then, so they listened to the whole interview. Is that right? Well, they listened to that.

Speaker 1 All right, go ahead, Hank. I really didn't get it.
No, that was good.

Speaker 1 What did I say? What did I say wrong? That was a good idea. They patched it up.

Speaker 1 I love hearing you talk shop. Yeah, talk shop.
Hank, how sorry did they get it? What they didn't do, which I was doing. You rang the bell, you rang Missoula's fucking thing.

Speaker 1 And Hank thought that there was a possibility this could happen.

Speaker 1 Before the interview, we were waiting in this room for Caleb to shower or get ready after practice.

Speaker 1 We were waiting in another room. Yeah.
We weren't waiting in the room where Caleb was showering. We were waiting in a different room while Caleb was showering.
Yes. Caleb was showering in a bathroom.

Speaker 1 Yes. We were in the interview room that did not have running water.
Correct. And so we were waiting there and we got into a big, just, I want to say debate, but it was really just

Speaker 1 Hank versus the world. You know, like,

Speaker 1 you know, you know, like in the Roman Empire when they would like tie up a bear to a stake and then have a bunch of wolves just stand around it and try to kill it?

Speaker 1 That's what we were doing to Hank for about 20 minutes. And Hank thought that they might use some of this, this just Hank baiting.
That was when we knew that the guys

Speaker 1 liked us and knew us because they were chuckling in the background. And I was like, you see, we just never turn off the podcast.
We're just doing it right now. Well, Hank was in a mood too.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 So he wasn't in a mood, but it was... It was a great mood.
It was really cool. I said a mood.
I didn't say what kind of mood. So they patched into our sound? Yeah.
They patched it in.

Speaker 1 They punched into our sound. So we were like, this is awesome.
Maybe they'll use a clip. Cool.

Speaker 1 And then, like, maybe a day later, I got a text from someone at Hard Knocks and they're like, hey, can we get all your footage? And I was like, yeah, no problem.

Speaker 1 And at that point, I was like, boys, I think we're going to be in Hard Knox. Yeah.
And then they sent us the edit.

Speaker 1 What is Sunday? And we watched it. And we're like, well, this is the coolest thing ever.
So, yeah, the show that we've been watching for 20 years,

Speaker 1 we all made it.

Speaker 4 Yeah.

Speaker 1 And Caleb was a cool guy, confident guy. I liked talking to him.
I think the way that he came across or the way that he's coming across on hard knocks is also what we saw in person. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Seemed like a good dude.

Speaker 1 He would have pressed the button. He would have killed somebody.
Oh, yeah. He was pressing the button.

Speaker 1 He was smashing that kill Bears fan button on his leg. And I would imagine, just from the replies that I got on Twitter tonight, there are probably thousands of Bears fans.
Everyone was saying

Speaker 1 that would willingly die for 10 Bears Super Bowl. If you got the credit for it, for sure.
Yeah, yeah. Get the statue.

Speaker 1 It was, besides us, we're not such narcissists that that was the only hard knocks recap.

Speaker 1 I mean, I obviously

Speaker 1 loved the episode just because it was, the hype is at an all-time high. I understand that.
It was the Bengals' second defense. I understand that.
But

Speaker 1 I'm going to ride the hype wave. The way they edited it, the way they ended it, what do you do?

Speaker 1 We got a text while you were talking, Big Cat. It was from Max.
Max is now butting into the show via text. He says, Hank, take your hand out of your pocket.

Speaker 1 It looks like you're jerking off.

Speaker 1 It did. I looked over and it did look like you're jerking off.

Speaker 5 On camera, it doesn't look good.

Speaker 1 I did that off air because I thought it would do it.

Speaker 2 I didn't want to blow up a spot on the show.

Speaker 1 Well, we couldn't tell, Max, because you touch your balls all the time. That's true.
That's true. That's true.

Speaker 1 Welcome to any new listeners apart from my tape.

Speaker 1 Actually, Hank does this every episode. He jerks off at some point.
You got to figure out when.

Speaker 1 Usually during the Lighthouse segment. Yeah.
So,

Speaker 1 yeah, no, it was an awesome episode. I mean, they were, I feel like they finally like started hammering in on different players that was really cool, like Tori Taylor.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 He looks like Chef Donnie. He's a weapon.
He uh, he doesn't like the nickname the crocodile hunter, which that was the classic like media thing. Yeah.
Oh, there's an Australian guy.

Speaker 1 Let's ask him if his nickname is the only Australian person that we know. And he was like, no, I don't know.
like call me literally anything but that. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I actually thought he looked like Brogan Roback. And I thought that his nickname should be Bogan Roback.
Ooh, I like that. He looks like Chef Donnie, too.
Yeah. Or Chef Donnie.

Speaker 1 And then we had Tyson Bagent was great. His dad is a world-class arm wrestler.
Well, not world-class, like, he is universe-class. Yeah, the best best in the history of left-handed arm wrestling.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he's the best. Austin Booker, the Ferret King.
No, the different guy. Oh, no.

Speaker 1 Who's the Ferret King? Is it Velis or Velas Jones? I don't think Velas Jones is the Ferret King. I thought he was the Ferret King.
Yeah. Oh, he might have been.

Speaker 1 I think he's the Ferret King, which is, it's a red flag for me that he's a ferret guy. Yeah.
And very, and he may have murdered his ferret. Oh, yeah, it was Velas Jones.
Uh, what was Austin Booker?

Speaker 1 He had a nickname, too. Uh, Austin Booker.
I don't know. Um,

Speaker 1 I, he just had like he was just doing in nicknames for everyone. Is his nickname Austin Reed? Austin Reed, yeah, that's probably it.
They're very similar. They just switched names.

Speaker 1 Yeah, the Austin Reid had a nice moment singing to everyone. Yeah, that was a lot of fun.
Case of Cole. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And then we also had a pretty cool

Speaker 1 situation where we learned about the Judon trade, which we actually are going to talk about in Hot C Cool Throne. I think we pretty much covered it.
I had some nice spin zones,

Speaker 1 but it was good. I'll say this.
I wish I had seen the episode before we talked about Hot C Cool Throne. Hank, did you watch that part?

Speaker 1 Ryan Poles has guardrails.

Speaker 1 And he doesn't want to go too far before.

Speaker 1 I saw the one. I saw Iber Flues talking to the guy on the sidelines.
He was like, you think it's going to happen? They're like, yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's like if you're driving your car and you're like, you think we're going to crash? Oh, no, the guardrail's there. I love it because Big Cat was prepping for Hank to come at him.

Speaker 1 And the line of defense he had set up was just guardrails. Guardrails.
Just

Speaker 1 said that. You're like, should we drive straight? And they say yes.
No.

Speaker 1 No, no, no, no, no. If you're going to crash,

Speaker 1 you're going to crash, which would have been trading for Matthew Judon. It would have been, we would have totaled our car.
Instead, the guardrail saved us. Like, Hank, if there was a guardrail.

Speaker 1 The guardrails being, and the guardrails are just Matthew Judon saying no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
It was the guardrail. Hank doesn't understand.

Speaker 1 If there was a guardrail around that telephone pole in the the parking lot, my car would be fine. Yeah.
I don't think you understand what a guardrail is.

Speaker 1 We're going to do the Mount Rush where things are hard to explain. It's a guardrail.
And so, yeah, so like I just saw the clip where they're like, yeah, we really, we're going for him.

Speaker 1 We're going to get him. Even for him.
Are we going to get him? And they're like, yep. But that right after that moment, which you probably didn't see, you didn't watch the episode,

Speaker 1 he hit into the guardrail. Got it.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah, there was a full room in there. I wasn't really going to say that.
He did have a guardrail. I wasn't going to squeeze in.
He had a binder ready. Polis had a binder.

Speaker 1 He was just reading off fake stats. That was set.
He was.

Speaker 1 No, no, no.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he's 50th and

Speaker 1 wins.

Speaker 1 Does he have that stats for every NFL player? Like, could you tell me via a punter how many wins added you get with a punter?

Speaker 1 That scene was, I think Kevin Warren put it in the Hard Knocks contract that he has to be in at least three scenes an episode.

Speaker 1 Oh, well, let's not downplay the scene where he was talking about the different chairs that you can get.

Speaker 1 That was riveting television. They're designing suites for their stadium that doesn't exist.

Speaker 1 And Kevin Warren's making, he's making executive choices about whether or not you want a high-top chair with a back, if you want people

Speaker 1 sitting up, if you want people standing, if you want an Adirondack chair. That's what you pay a guy.
He's president of the team, right? Yeah. These are the decisions that a president has to make.

Speaker 1 Listen, I'll squash my beef with Kevin Warren for canceling the Big Ten football season when COVID happened if he gets the Bears a new stadium. But that was,

Speaker 1 I assume Ryan Poles when he has to do these scenes where he's just like, I can just say any stat. Yeah.

Speaker 1 It will be good. Yeah, 50th in added wins for a defensive end.
Montez was 19th last season. Oh, I see right here.
He's 32. Looks like we hit a guardrail.

Speaker 1 That's one of the guardrails we talked about earlier. Oh, he's from Louisiana.

Speaker 1 He probably wants to go to Atlanta. Listen, listen.
Don't spoil the hot seat cool drone spin zones that I had. He cooked up some good ones.
I had a question for you.

Speaker 1 After the game, they gave Caleb Williams the ball from his first touchdown pass. Or Or was it from his run, his touchdown run?

Speaker 1 Is that the first time that you think a football has been put into an alligator purse?

Speaker 1 That wasn't his purse. I think that was his carry-all.
His purse was next to the. Oh, the carry-all.
Yeah, yeah. Is that the first time? Please, PFTA.
Is that the first

Speaker 1 football has been put into

Speaker 1 an alligator carry-all? No, definitely. Dude's been rocking.
Absolutely forever. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Are you serious? I don't know.

Speaker 1 We're asking a question.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's a common

Speaker 1 next to the carry-all if you put it in there yeah maybe you'd have an argument the carry-all is guys walk in think about the tunnel walk like esp and countdown how many they're all wearing they all have the carry it's all gator yeah a lot of them i got to get into some gator yeah i mean we're going to get into it killed him i'm probably going to buy whatever that european handbag he has is yeah the gator one no i'm going to get the carry-all that's the carry-all I'm also I thought it was a matching set.

Speaker 1 I'm also going to get the handbag. No, I don't think they're matching sets.

Speaker 1 Good episode, though. Yeah, I liked it.
I liked it a lot. It's so funny that Matthew Judon trade was like a five-minute segment after we had taped.

Speaker 1 The Wi-Fi is not great here, so we're trying to get the upload as fast as possible so people can listen.

Speaker 1 And so we taped a lot of the show earlier today, and we had an extended spin zone from me about where places are in America.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Only other thing I had before we get to Hot Sea Cool Throne is: are you guys sitting down?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 J-Lo and Ben Affleck have broken up. Divorce.
I never could have seen this coming. Do you think he's dead? Do you think maybe the band's getting back together? I don't know.
A-Rod's.

Speaker 1 If I know A-Rod, he's not going to call first. This has A-Rod's soft fingerprints all over it.
Listen, if we see J-Lo at some minutes, she is a Timberwolves fan. Yeah.
Diehard. So, wouldn't shock me.

Speaker 1 But yeah.

Speaker 1 I mean,

Speaker 1 you guys thought they were going to be together forever. I did, but you know what? This is a good opportunity.
I honestly didn't even realize I got married again.

Speaker 1 I thought they were going to be a kid. I just dated her.
They were like divorced? Yeah, they had gotten divorced. I thought they just started dating again.
It's a good opportunity for us because

Speaker 1 we can't date Taylor Swift. She's off the market.
But I think maybe you could slide into J-Lo's deal.

Speaker 1 I've been to multiple of her houses before. Multiple of her houses.
How about that? You've been in her back doors.

Speaker 1 We have been to multiple of her houses. That's weird.
And she smelled nice in all of them. Yes.
And she hate, she only hates them.

Speaker 1 I don't even think they let me walk inside the one of the Hamptons or just like showed me. Oh, we never went inside.
She showed me

Speaker 1 to the backyard. The LA one.
She's got a great backyard.

Speaker 1 The LA one, she,

Speaker 1 I've never seen someone more angry to see two guys in someone's house. Like that weren't

Speaker 1 outside of someone robbing. Actually, I think she would have been less angry if it was robbers.
Because she'd have been like, I'll just call the police. She saw us and her face immediately dropped.

Speaker 1 And she's like, these fucking guys are in my ass. The blog boys are here again.
Yeah, that was bad. Hank, between you and J-Lo, you'd have a perfectly normal size ass yeah yeah

Speaker 1 dude hank you should happen just like just reach out hank send her a dm okay send her dm right now i want to see it she's like heard you got divorced

Speaker 1 hey remember me yeah heard you got i was the guy that was in your backyard

Speaker 1 Oh, wait, no, no, no, just write so divorce question mark.

Speaker 1 No, oh, no, Hank, do uh, do so, dot, dot, dot. Yeah, divorce question question mark?

Speaker 1 Look, here's a picture from her from her backyard. Oh, yeah.
That is. Let me see a picture.
Really nice backyard. Yeah, it's really nice.

Speaker 1 What did you send her? What did you send her? I said so, dot, dot, dot. Divorce question mark?

Speaker 1 No, you follow up with a divorce.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I'll wait till tomorrow. I'll send her the exclamation point on that.
Be like, you must have missed this. I heard you like guys from Boston.

Speaker 1 Well, no, that's a bad time for that. And she's also, yeah, she's going back to E-Rod.
It's true. Yeah.
So we're good. But yeah, shocking news in the love world, which we cover extensively.

Speaker 1 It's tough on this show. Also, there was a fire at the Cowboys hotel today.
Oh, yeah. So everyone's safe.
Who started it?

Speaker 1 If I had to guess, I would probably say Jerry. This might be a Vesuvius thing.

Speaker 1 He needs money. He's got to pay Dak and CD.
He might trade CD. Yeah, you're right.

Speaker 1 I'm surprised they're still at camp. I feel like camp ended.
Camp broke for a lot of people, yeah. Yeah, because they just announced like a lot of of these preseason games, no one starter.

Speaker 1 Honestly, if we're being real, if Michael Irvin was around. Yeah.

Speaker 1 That was his fire. That's my guess.
That was his fire, for sure.

Speaker 1 Okay, we got a great rest of the show, so we'll kick it to ourselves with Hot Sea Cool Throne, Mount Rushmore of Things That Are Hard to Explain, and Caleb Williams.

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Speaker 1 My hot seat is the Chicago Bears. Uh-oh.
Why?

Speaker 1 We talked about the Matthew Judon trade, and basically

Speaker 1 it worked out for the Patriots. The Bears and the Falcons had very similar offers, so the Patriots gave Matthew Judon the option of which team he wanted to go to, and he chose the Falcons.

Speaker 1 I mean, he's from Louisiana, I think, so not too far from Atlanta. Yeah, they love the Falcons in Louisiana.
Yeah, they love them.

Speaker 1 I'm honestly happy that we didn't trade.

Speaker 1 Yeah,

Speaker 1 I think Ryan Poles has got it set up perfectly. But they wanted to.

Speaker 1 Well, they offered. Yeah.
Yeah, made the offer. I sound like Ryan Poles doing that.
It's not intentional. No, but it sounds like the Bears drove up the price for the Falcons.
Yeah, exactly.

Speaker 1 No, it's the same price.

Speaker 1 Drove it up. They had two offers.
Drove it up. No,

Speaker 1 they drove it up. They drove it up.
Because the Falcons had to match. So you're trying to.

Speaker 1 So the guy that you said was definitely going to be still on the Patriots, you're now saying it's a loss for the Bears.

Speaker 1 I think if it gets presented in the way it got presented, where it's like a player had the choice.

Speaker 1 I saw this tweet. It was a Bears, not the Falcon.
I was tackling it. It was a couple of days ago.
Yeah, it was a week old. Let me see.
Albert Breer's tweet was really the mean one. one.

Speaker 1 And I didn't even think it was fair. But wait, Hank, I thought you were saying that it's okay to lose Matthew Judon because he's getting older.
Two days ago. So wouldn't that be a good

Speaker 1 thing?

Speaker 1 Shouldn't I be happy that he's not on the Bears? That was a good question. He doesn't really fit with Eberflues' scheme either.

Speaker 1 Albert Breer said New England, believing the Bears and Falcons were in similar category and with third-round offers from both, gave linebacker Judon his choice of being dealt to Atlanta or Chicago.

Speaker 1 And then Breer said Judon obviously picked Atlanta. Obviously.
Well, obviously that was probably.

Speaker 1 He might not even be a starter from Louisiana.

Speaker 1 I think the obviously part came from the fact that he is indeed a Falcon, so obviously he did pick the Falcons.

Speaker 1 Also, not fitting into Matt Ebruff Luce's scheme,

Speaker 1 that's a very good thing historically. Matt Ebruf was a good defensive coordinator.
I mean, just as a head coach. Yeah, but he's a good defense.

Speaker 1 He turned that defense around when our defensive coordinator left for various reasons.

Speaker 1 Was it various reasons? Various reasons.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Matthew Judon. He's from Louisiana, close to Atlanta, and he went to high school in Michigan.

Speaker 1 Probably hates the Bears because he liked the Lions.

Speaker 1 That makes sense. Yeah, actually, if you do Detroit and Baton Rouge, Atlanta's probably right in the middle.
Also,

Speaker 1 net positive for the Bears because he wears the long-sleeve sweatshirt. Yep.
That's not a tough Chicago bear weather guy. Listen, we're not in full wind now mode.
We're in win-now now.

Speaker 1 We wanted him.

Speaker 1 Find me a tweet where I said I wanted him. No, the Bears.
I'm saying you.

Speaker 1 I think Ryan Paul is just, he's just, you know, he's wheeling and dealing. He's out in the business.
You've got to at least call. I would say the win-now window

Speaker 1 is open, though, for the Bears. Yeah, Win-Now window might be open.
I think it's open. We got Chris Margular season games.
He got a nice little draft coming in.

Speaker 1 Then my cool thrones back. Jesus is trying to yuck my yum.
No, I just, you know,

Speaker 1 it was a topic of conversation on this show.

Speaker 1 Hank is an interesting follow-up. That's a Hank isn't following.

Speaker 1 Hank is in the depths because he actually, I saw him off camera the other day admit that the Patriots are going to be terrible this year. He's trying to drag us downward.

Speaker 1 That's just, I mean, if we're doing admitations off camera, that's a slippery slope.

Speaker 1 Oh, what did I admit? No, I'm not going to stoop to that level.

Speaker 1 What did I admit? What's going on, Hank? What's on your mind? I'm not going to stoop to that level. My cool throw's back here.

Speaker 1 You're obviously thinking about it. Where do I begin? I mean, I got a larger list of things.
There's a code. There's a code.

Speaker 1 I mean, saying that you think the Patriots are bad, that's a bad, that's a code that I broke. I didn't say that I think they're bad.
I just think they're going to be bad in a lot of games. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Statistically. Yeah.
My cool thing was Backyard Baseball. Okay.
Oh, yeah, it's back. It's back.
Yeah. They released a video.

Speaker 1 Someone found that they started an Instagram a couple weeks ago, and someone uncovered the Instagram, which is one of the crazier, like, that's just a weird internet thing where someone's like, I found this backyard baseball Instagram account.

Speaker 1 It has 200 followers, but it follows.

Speaker 1 How do you find that? That seems like it was planted. Maybe, because then it came back this week.
Didn't we talk to them? Yeah, we did.

Speaker 1 What is that supposed to be? No,

Speaker 1 I don't know. I'm pretty sure they came into the office because we were talking about maybe making a level

Speaker 1 that's our office. I got a text about that from somebody, and I passed it along.
Yeah. I don't know if you followed it.
This is a bad admit offline. No, this is your thing now.
Well,

Speaker 1 I'm asking a question.

Speaker 1 We did, yeah, that happened. It didn't happen publicly, but it definitely happened.
I'm going to have

Speaker 1 to strike that admit from the chat for now.

Speaker 1 Strike that admit from the.

Speaker 1 It would have been sick. It would have been sick.
I'm punching it. It still might have happened.
Who knows?

Speaker 1 This actually makes it probably a better chance. I haven't done.
I have an on-camera admission, Hank. Okay.
I've never played backyard baseball. I also have never.
It seems like it's fun.

Speaker 1 Because

Speaker 1 we're a little older.

Speaker 2 This stinks for you guys.

Speaker 1 I want to play it. I'm not knocking it.
I would love to play it. Pablo Sanchez.
When did it come out? Like,

Speaker 1 I don't know. What was it? Kenny Cowley.

Speaker 2 At least like 99.

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 2 Because the players were definitely your era of players.

Speaker 1 Pablo. Yeah.

Speaker 2 1997. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I'm sorry. I missed it.
How old are you?

Speaker 1 Here's the thing. My family, we were always like two generations behind the most current game system.
So it would take me a good like eight years to catch up to whatever was possible. Sunny Day,

Speaker 1 Chuck Downfield.

Speaker 1 I really wanted Matthew Judon on the team.

Speaker 1 Dante Robinson. Kenny Calaguchi, that's what it was.
Sunned us like that. Vicki Calaguchi was trash.
Change the topic.

Speaker 1 I got my feet hurt the other day because there was one of those.

Speaker 1 Yeah, there was a Twitter poll out there that said, which quarterback would you rather have retweet for Jaden Daniels? heart for Drake May.

Speaker 1 And of course, Drake May won. That's dirty trick.
That's what I don't like. I don't like that.
That's election interference when you do that. You could

Speaker 1 put up a poll that said, which cast member of part of my take is taller, retweet for Big Cat, Heart for PFT, and I would win that. Maybe not.
Maybe.

Speaker 1 Maybe we should do a social experiment on that one. Because I feel like those polls, those polls are skewed.

Speaker 1 They're skewed, and I don't like it. They are skewed.
They are skewed.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I'm excited for Backyard Baseball. Backyard football, also elite.

Speaker 1 It was a computer game?

Speaker 1 So maybe I did play it a little bit. No, no, you're not allowed to do it.
No, no, no. You're not allowed to talk about it.
No,

Speaker 1 you would know Weber and Pablo Sanchez if you got to control their power and speed. I'm not saying I ever played it to like, I never played it, but I've like I have played one time, maybe.

Speaker 1 Kenny Kalaguchi. Because I forgot it was computer.
So it was on

Speaker 1 a gaming system. It was a computer game.
MS-DOS. Yes.
Yes. CD-ROM.
I'm starting to come back to me, but I did not play it. I'm not saying I played it.

Speaker 1 I'm saying I was aware of it more than I realized. That would be a good Mount Rushmore, too, is Mount Rushmore of computer games.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Snood, not video games. Snood 1-1.

Speaker 1 I love Snood. Doom.
Power Pete. I heard backyard baseball.
What do you want? Boom.

Speaker 1 Doom and Quake.

Speaker 1 Chunk of Chunk? I used to play Matt. I used to play like MVP baseball on computer.

Speaker 1 That was my... Yeah, no, it was N64.
Ken Griffey baseball was my jam.

Speaker 2 The free pinball on...

Speaker 1 Yeah, I hate free pinball school. I've never been a pinball guy.
Not on the media. No, no.
In general, I hate pinball. But the space pinball on the computer was illegal.

Speaker 2 Hank puts like 18 hours of pinball in a week at our office.

Speaker 1 When Hank complains about coming to work. When he takes a vacation, he's he's actually mostly taking a vacation for pinball.

Speaker 1 It's basically, it just trades off he and Spider, and whoever has the record, you just can just take the other person and scratch off their entire week knowing that that's all they're going to try to do.

Speaker 2 There's times where Hank's like, all right, I'm heading home. See you guys later.
And then, like, three hours later,

Speaker 2 you walk over into the kitchen. It's like, what, dude?

Speaker 1 You're still here? It's the ultimate because it's free. It's like, it's an ultimate, like, one more game.
And then it's like, yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Do you know pinball used to be like a badass thing to do back in the day in like the 60s, 70s? Dads would be like, don't date that boy. He plays pinball.
Pinball is a fun game. It's addicting.

Speaker 1 Probably why. It's like addictive personality syndrome.
Good hot seat, cool throwing hand. Thanks.
Yeah, you and Spider, two real rebels of the office.

Speaker 1 My hot seat is that guy Sinner, the tennis player. Oh, steroids? Steroids.
Oh, so Sinner just won at Indian Wells, I think last week. He beat Tiafo.
And a report just came out today.

Speaker 1 He tested positive, not once, but twice for a banned substance. The tennis community, this was like months ago, they found out about it.

Speaker 1 They gave him a slap on the wrist and they accepted his explanation of how he got the steroids in his system.

Speaker 1 And the explanation is his trainer was performing, like, I don't know, you get calluses on your feet during a tournament or something.

Speaker 1 And his trainer said that he had a scalpel to cut off part of the calluses, accidentally sliced his thumb, and then used like one of those new skin type sprays on his cut to heal it up.

Speaker 1 And then later on in the day, gave Sinner a full body massage. And that's how the chemical got onto Sinner's body.
Okay, so two things. One, his name is Sinner.
Yeah. Okay, so hate the sin.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah. Love the center.
Two, um,

Speaker 1 I think I defend him because if you come up with such a bullshit excuse the first time and they buy it, why wouldn't you keep doing it? Being like, they'll just come up with this.

Speaker 1 They'll accept anything. Well, it was the same excuse.
He tested positive twice for it, but he said that

Speaker 1 that's how he got it. Yeah, again,

Speaker 1 I think I have his back because, like, that's on the tennis community.

Speaker 1 What's the federation? So, I actually saw this. They have a ridiculous name.
I'm trying to look it up right now. It's called like the Federation for Fairness in Tennis.
But do you see what I'm saying?

Speaker 1 Like, if you use such a ridiculous excuse the first time and they buy it,

Speaker 1 what is the disincentive to not keep using that excuse? There's none, right? So, I would just keep doing it. Like,

Speaker 1 it makes no sense. RFK is going to keep collecting bear cubs in his car because he didn't get in trouble the first time.
That's just a fact. Right.
He got away with it.

Speaker 1 He's going to be a serial massager. Right.
So, yeah, he said that it came from a spray used on his trainer's hand, and then his trainer put the chemical on his body via a full body massage.

Speaker 1 And then he tested positive. And then he tested positive.
Got it later. Yeah.
Again, this is. The other tennis players are pissed.

Speaker 1 This is essentially like, no, honey, the glitter on me is not from the strip club. I actually went to a sprinkles party.

Speaker 1 I was going home and there was a huge stop in traffic and there was a three-year-old's birthday party happening and I got sprinkle bombs.

Speaker 1 I actually stopped by Michael's, the craft store, to pick up some things for the house because I know you like decorating. Right.
And if she buys that, then you're going to keep doing that.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so Senner said, I will now put this challenging and deeply unfortunate period behind me.

Speaker 1 I will continue to do everything I can to ensure that I comply comply with the ITIA's anti-doping program. It's called the International Tennis Integrity Agency.

Speaker 1 If an agency is named like that explicitly?

Speaker 1 Cornerly, yeah. It's no, there's no better mark that that agency is completely full of shit.
Yes, agreed.

Speaker 1 If you have to add more, the word salad agencies are always the most full of shit agencies in the world. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay, good hot seat. It's the same drug that Fernando Tatis Tatis got suspended for.
Did he also get a massage? I'm sure he did. Yeah.
I'm sure he's always hurt, so probably.

Speaker 1 So my cool throne is going to be Kirk Cousins. Kirk Cousins on the playlist.
He got the Ox Chord the other day. It was his birthday, so they let him choose the workout playlist at practice.

Speaker 1 I'm just going to run through it because when I saw that it was a Kirk Cousins playlist, I thought that there would be a lot of nickelback.

Speaker 1 I thought there'd be some creed, some cold play, maybe some DC talk or jars of clay if you want to dip into the spiritual side. But his playlist is The Middle by Jimmy Eat World.

Speaker 1 Move Along by The All-American Rejects. There's Green Day, Stacey's Mom, Fountains of Wayne.
Maybe got a little

Speaker 1 New York Jets quarterback in them. Former Jet, current Bronco.

Speaker 1 All the Small Things by Blink182. The Anthem by Good Charlotte, Mr.
Brightside. This sounds like an awesome playlist.
The Best of You by the Foo Fighters. Another Good Charlotte song.

Speaker 1 Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous. Dirty Little Secret, Sugar We're Going Down.
Somebody Told Me by the Killers, Dear Maria, Count Me In by All Time Low.

Speaker 1 This guy has good taste in music now, or maybe, maybe we're just washed. No,

Speaker 1 yes, we are. Yeah, why not both?

Speaker 1 True. Can I?

Speaker 1 I was gonna say, why not both? Because you and I are. Good point.
Yeah, yeah. Listen, this.

Speaker 1 You don't have to see. 31 is not washed.

Speaker 1 It's not washed tank. This is.
31 is a spring chicken. This is a great playlist.
Yeah, it is. Like, Kirk Cousins surprised me.
I saw it and I wanted to roast it. I was like, all these songs rock.

Speaker 1 This is good. It's actually 90% of a pup punk playlist.

Speaker 1 These are actually, this is our set list. Oh, Kirk Cousins singing a pup punk song on stage would be awesome.
You might just have to start doing shows in Atlanta. Yeah.

Speaker 1 If you do it, like if you build it, they will come. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Just a residency in Atlanta. Kirk, listen, anytime you want, you can get on stage, sing a song with us.
You don't have to sing the F-word parts. Yeah.
We'll bleep those out. We will.

Speaker 1 Okay, my hot seat

Speaker 1 is us. This is a theme now.
We're just talking about watching. Actually, Hank, you might be in this.
Max, you might be in this too. I was thinking,

Speaker 1 so we have a great life. We have a great job.
Everything is awesome. But there are definitely certain times when you're like, man, I missed that.

Speaker 1 And every year, no matter what, it's these last two weeks of August. When I see kids going back to college, I'm like, fuck.
that was, that's it.

Speaker 1 So I want to just give a PSA to anyone listening to this right now who went back to college or maybe starting college. It is the fastest four years of your life.

Speaker 1 So just embrace it and like close your eyes and live in the moment.

Speaker 1 But I, I don't know, something about these, like, like college football starting next week, those first few games on campus when it's hot and everyone's partying.

Speaker 1 And everyone, like, the, the first, September is such a joke in college. You don't go to any of your classes.
You don't have to worry about anything. Midterms feel like so long away.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it was constantly welcome week where it was just an entire week where everyone went back just to rage.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I miss it. It is a very, very good week.
And it's funny because when you're in college, you take summers off and then you go home, you party with all your friends from your hometown.

Speaker 1 And then when you go back to school, you don't have that downside of, oh, god damn it, I have to go back to school. You have, oh yeah, I get to go hang out with all my friends from college again.

Speaker 1 And it's a great week. And yeah, I do miss that too.
It is because i there's a lot of things about college i do not miss and like you know living in in squalor and i kind of miss that

Speaker 1 every now and then i i

Speaker 1 i talked to you guys i told you guys my wife was out of town last week i kind of went back to that i was like i don't think this is for me anymore but uh

Speaker 1 yeah there's every now and then i'm just like man i miss that welcome week you know what i'm talking about hank

Speaker 1 I kind of miss the idea of just having an apartment where I would not care if everything in there got lost in fire. I've lived in squalor for for sure, just not at college.
Just breaking shit. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Putting holes in the wall. That's artwork now.
I threw a backwards

Speaker 1 pass. I lived in the same apartment for two years in Madison.
Didn't somehow didn't really break a lot of stuff. Like, you know, wear and tear.

Speaker 1 Last day before we moved out, I threw a behind-the-back pass beer can right through the window. That rocks.
That's awesome. I mean, it's cheap.
And I had no money and it was like 300 bucks to fix.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's too late. This fucking sucks.
Yeah, forget about that glass pane. It was, I think I was living with the beeve at one point, and we had so much trash in the kitchen.

Speaker 1 And our landlord came over. He was like, you guys got to get rid of all this trash.
And I was like, okay, be careful what you wish for, bro.

Speaker 1 And so I took it out on the porch. And we had, it was, you know, like one of those second story apartments.

Speaker 1 So you had like a little deck area that was maybe, you know, the size of, I don't know, just like a large closet. And then you had a deck above you and a deck below you.

Speaker 1 I took all that trash out there. We gathered it.
And then we had a controlled burn.

Speaker 1 We just lit it on fire. And then the landlord came by later and he was like, You can't be lighting fires.

Speaker 1 Told us, I said, Okay, dad, you told me to take the trash out. Not our fault, not our fault.
Um, okay, my cool throne is so, yeah, just embrace college.

Speaker 1 If you're going to college, if you're going back to college, if you're starting college, fucking embrace it because the beginning, the first few weeks when it's just beautiful weather and you don't have to go to class is just

Speaker 1 there's something special. Uh, all right, my cool throne.

Speaker 1 I have two. One is for Aaron Rodgers because when we had Aaron Rodgers on

Speaker 1 for Chill Week, he told us make football hard again. That was one of the things he wanted.

Speaker 1 And he said that the camp, the Jets camp this year is much harder and maybe the hardest in the last seven or eight years of his career.

Speaker 1 And he said that Robert Salah is like really cracking the whip and the boys are hitting hard and it's tough and it's making football hard. So good job, Aaron Rodgers.
Made football hard again.

Speaker 1 Good job, Aaron Rodgers. And it sounds like everybody on the Jets is there?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Right? Hasan Reddick? Update, memes? This is supposed to be a positive story. Memes, is Asan Reddick not hard?

Speaker 1 I

Speaker 1 memes, the season's about to start.

Speaker 1 He'll come.

Speaker 1 He'll come. Well,

Speaker 1 he's got to be hard before he comes. He's going to come.
No, he's going to come. He'll get hard.
He'll come.

Speaker 1 You sure he's going to come? Positive. He's going to come.
Okay. Well, so he has not come yet, right? And he owes, what, like, $3 million?

Speaker 1 That's an expensive come.

Speaker 2 What will you do if he doesn't come?

Speaker 3 We just wait for him, but Matthew Judon is helping him come.

Speaker 1 Why?

Speaker 3 He said today

Speaker 2 that he wants to show off for the Falcons so he could earn his contract.

Speaker 1 So how does that have anything to do with Hassan Reddick? Oh, Hassan Reddick just needs to show up and he'll get that contract.

Speaker 1 So you think Hassan Reddick saw Matthew Judon said that and said, you know what? He's right. Well, it doesn't help his case.
What?

Speaker 1 Hassan Reddick, because he hasn't showed up. Well, Hassan Reddick is watching another man come for the Falcons, and he's not coming yet.
Also, Hassan Reddick is three years younger than Matthew John.

Speaker 1 Matthew John knows that this is his last chance at a contract.

Speaker 1 Could be Hassan's, too. Okay.
I guess, yeah. Yeah, right.
Universal sense. 29 could be his last big one.
Kyle Shanahan taught us we might die tomorrow. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Memes, I don't think you're going to get him to come.

Speaker 1 I think we will. I really don't think you're going to get him to come.
I don't even think he's hard. He hasn't been at camp.
He can't get... Yeah, you have to be at camp to get hard.
Right.

Speaker 1 So he's not, he's

Speaker 1 soft as could be right now, and you're telling me he's going to come. I think he's going to come.
No,

Speaker 1 you got to walk before you nut.

Speaker 1 All right. My other cool throne is Tua.
Tua's on my cool throne. Yeah.
Because he went on Lebatard's show. and basically

Speaker 1 said that Brian Flores was doing mental torture on him. And he said, if you woke up every morning and I told you that you suck at what you did,

Speaker 1 that you don't belong,

Speaker 1 that you don't belong doing what you do, that you shouldn't be here, that this guy should be here, that you haven't earned this right, and then you have somebody else come in and tell you, dude, you're the best fit for this.

Speaker 1 He said, how would it make you feel listening to one or the other? Talking about Brian Flores basically shitting on Tua every single day. And so normally I saw that clip.
I was like, yeah, that sucks.

Speaker 1 But who knows? Like, Tua might be exaggerating. Brian Flores actually came out and said, like, I've evolved.
And yeah, I kind of fucked that up. Yeah.
Also, I think Tua said he was a terrible person.

Speaker 1 Yeah. You don't really hear quarterbacks say it that much.
It sounds like Tua is to Brian Flores as Big Cat is to the chat.

Speaker 1 What do you mean? Like the chat is your Brian Flores. Oh, yes.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Every time I log on for the streams, for the Doug streams, they're like, you're terrible at what you do. You shouldn't be here.
Someone else should be here. You suck.
I hate you.

Speaker 1 Sliders, cheat code, glitch play. You just need more positive positive energy.
Learn more plays. Learn more plays.
Oh, yeah, four-played playbook. You're never going to win the big one.

Speaker 1 You're a piece of shit. No composure.
No composure. You're fat.
We hate you. We hope you die.

Speaker 1 This does give more.

Speaker 1 Pre-recorded. Pre-recorded.
This does give more credence to our theory, though, that former New England Patriots coaches, they go places, they become head coaches.

Speaker 1 And then they absolutely tank those teams so that the Patriots would have an easier walk through their division.

Speaker 1 It sounds like if you were to tell me that Brian Flores was sent on a mission to the Miami Dolphins to destroy the team and destroy their new quarterback, it sounds like that's exactly what he was doing.

Speaker 1 Flores admitted it was true. So Tua is not wrong.
But his last two seasons with the Dolphins, they won 19 games. Mike McDaniel's first two seasons with the Dolphins, they've won 20.
Okay. So

Speaker 1 it's not like he was the worst coach in the world. He was getting semi-results.
No,

Speaker 1 they missed the playoffs with 10 wins. Let's look back at Brian Fleur's tenure as Miami Dolphin.
He destroyed the confidence of their young quarterback. He sued the team, and he narced on the team.

Speaker 1 But he won some games. It's also just as simple as everyone

Speaker 1 would leave Belichick's coaching tree and try to be Bill Belichick. And turns out...

Speaker 1 When you tell someone you suck, you don't know what you're doing, you're a piece of shit, it's something that you can listen to when the person has six rings.

Speaker 1 And when they don't, they're just an asshole. Or it's easier for you to accept that criticism if you're already good.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Like if you're Tom Brady and you have a guy that's telling you like always on your case, I'm sure that sucks a lot. Yeah.

Speaker 1 But it's probably easier to digest that than it would be if you're a first-year quarterback and your coach is just destroying your confidence before you have an opportunity to get any.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's carrot in the stick. If you know there's a carrot at the end and someone says, oh, they're hitting you with the stick, it's like, well, I'm going to get the carrot.

Speaker 1 Actually, that doesn't work. We have to change that.

Speaker 1 We gotta change that entire analogy, too. Because who gives a fuck about a carrot?

Speaker 1 If I'm getting hit by a stick, I'd rather have the carrot. If you were to say, like, cool ranch Doritos, yeah,

Speaker 1 did a rabbit write that? Yeah,

Speaker 1 that makes no sense. It should be a Coors Light and a stick, yeah, Mountain Dew and a stick.
Yeah, that's what I said. That would get me off, that would get me to get off my ass.
Mountain Dew.

Speaker 1 Shout out Mountain Dew. The best.
Uh, okay, Huey, you're up.

Speaker 1 Uh, my

Speaker 1 hot seat. Um, I got a question for you, Huey.
Yeah, when you do who's back, someone mentioned this. Do you say Hughes back?

Speaker 1 No, I think people want me to start saying Hughes back. Okay, guys.
Um, yeah, I got a couple DMs from that, and they're like, You should do Hughes back. Oh, I thought you might have even said it.

Speaker 1 It was kind of like

Speaker 1 dress, you know, is it whatever, green or gold? Yeah,

Speaker 1 black or gold. Uh, my hot seat, Godster

Speaker 1 Childress. Oh, yeah.
Um, So there's a former lion, first-round pick.

Speaker 1 He at one in the morning took a flight,

Speaker 1 apparently, in his apology, took a couple of sleeping medications

Speaker 1 that he's not familiar with. Okay.
And he peed on a woman.

Speaker 1 On a flight. On a plane.
Yes. On a plane.
Godster. Godster Children.
Children. Yeah, he's a big, like, big guy.
Childress. Childress.
Childress. Yeah.

Speaker 3 He's like 6'5 ⁇ , 6'6 ⁇ .

Speaker 1 He was a tackle. I mean, big, big son of a bitch.

Speaker 1 peeing on you peeing on you on a flight 1 a.m flight yeah it was a yeah i mean those if you do take sleeping pills you can have crazy things yeah crazy things can happen to you on flight yes absolutely insane things hank would you like see a picture of godster see if it's your speed

Speaker 1 no okay just seeing i'm not into that stuff i do i do love every time

Speaker 1 you're into planes when somebody goes viral for anything that happens on a plane just the first response is hank are you gonna date him

Speaker 1 just started dating Godster Childress.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 My cool throne,

Speaker 1 a man by the name of Decross. Oh, boy.

Speaker 1 Why do you pick the hardest names? Well, also,

Speaker 1 isn't it chairless? I don't think there's a D in the last name. We're just going with Childress.
Okay, Godster Churdless.

Speaker 1 Duquesse. Dukris Duplas.
Dupless.

Speaker 1 Are you talking about DDP? This guy from the DDP, yeah. The UFC guy.
Or D, no, DS, DSP?

Speaker 1 DDP. Yeah.
I just think of DDP. Dracis Duples.

Speaker 1 Driekas Duplas. Just go with DDP.
Duplessence.

Speaker 1 This is great because we can't get sued for this, even if we get the story wrong. Yeah.
We don't have any idea who he's talking about.

Speaker 1 He beat Israel out of Sonia. Oh, round four.

Speaker 1 Round four of a UFC fight.

Speaker 1 Round five. Sorry, round five championship fight.
But in round four,

Speaker 1 it was a rough, rough round for Decris.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 he was not looking good. He looked like he was clearly going to lose that fight.

Speaker 1 And then fifth round comes in.

Speaker 1 Izzy.

Speaker 1 Didn't happen.

Speaker 1 Is your cool throne the UFC fights from Saturday? My cool throne is Decris Duplas.

Speaker 1 Yeah, coming back out of nowhere.

Speaker 1 Waking up from the dead. This is like a Magic Johnson tweet.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Just like just four days later. Decris, way to go, dude.
So was it a good fight? It was. It was great.
Yeah. It was a great fight.
It was awesome. It was just, you know, we didn't see it coming.

Speaker 1 And now he's got the world in front of him.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Good for him.
Champion. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Cool throw. DDP.
DDP. Cool throw.

Speaker 1 Where did you find that story? Was that just that? No, I was watching it on Saturday, and then I just kind of forgot about it. Yeah, I kind of was like, let's bring it up.

Speaker 1 I wasn't watching that. I was

Speaker 1 going to save this for Friday's show. Would have been nicer if we've got even more time in between.

Speaker 1 I should start doing UFC recaps on Friday. Yeah, just a week later.
Wait, did you say that you weren't really watching the fight? You were watching mostly for Joe Rogan?

Speaker 1 Well, Joe Rogan had a commentator. Oh, you watched the fight commentator.
Yeah,

Speaker 1 companion. I knew what was happening.
Yeah. Yeah, he didn't buy the pay-per-view.
He watched Joe Rogan and Brendan Schaub watch it and commentate on it. I like that.

Speaker 1 That's a hell of a way to watch it.

Speaker 1 Huey's second screen is just his first screen. So they must have said his name a lot.
Yeah. Oh, yeah.
You know,

Speaker 1 they would say his last name a lot. Okay.
Where's he from?

Speaker 1 South Africa. Yeah.
Yeah, it was Battle of Africa. Misa.
Misa. Yeah, it was a Battle of Africa.
I'm from South Africa, so.

Speaker 1 All right. Good hot sequel throwing, everyone.
Let's do the Mount Rush more

Speaker 1 of things that are hard to explain.

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Speaker 1 Mount Rushmore of things that are hard to explain. Right now, we are

Speaker 1 with five Mount Rushmores left. Max is already clinched, whatever.
Congrats for five. Good job, Max.
Thanks, guys. I have 54, so I'm still in danger.
PFT has 47. Hank has 44.
Yes, I am.

Speaker 1 Anybody's game. Technically, it's cute when you throw that in there.
That's nice. Hank, if you rattle off the next five going number one.

Speaker 1 And I pick up a point, I'm screwed. I mean, Hank should have gotten number one last time.
I know, the voting. How do you feel about it?

Speaker 1 You blame the voters. No, I don't.
Stop the steal? Yeah. On your Mount Rushmore picks? Yeah, Hank looked at it.
He was the first vote, and it had 100% for him.

Speaker 1 And then all of a sudden, in the middle of the night, they changed all the votes. It's crazy.
So are you feeling?

Speaker 1 I feel good.

Speaker 1 I mean, I feel like this is a perfect Mount Rushmore for you because a lot of things are hard to explain for you. Well, there's a lot of material for Hank to work with.
Yeah. Yeah, I'm excited.

Speaker 1 I'm blessed to have the opportunity, and I'm looking forward to the end of the season. Okay.
You sound like a Belichick. You sound like you're about to retire.

Speaker 1 No, it's a hard game. You know, sometimes

Speaker 1 you finish a season, you want to get ready in the offseason and go for next year, and I might have to do some thinking. You got to circle the wagons right now.

Speaker 1 This is the time where you've got to circle the wagons

Speaker 4 gear up for the playoff push.

Speaker 1 Hank's thinking is going to be, wow, I don't have to do this anymore. And then next year he's going to be like, wait, this is back.
Yeah. That's going to be the extent.
I think we should do teams.

Speaker 1 Like, I don't, I think we might split up. Like,

Speaker 1 I don't know. It's kind of weird how this would sound next year, Mount Rostwar.
We're just going to have to do, like, we'll have me, Max, and PFT. We'll have all three of my kids.

Speaker 1 We'll just use their picks versus Hank and just see how he does.

Speaker 1 I should get the first four picks, and then you guys go. That's actually not, yeah, that's not a bad idea.
Well, I mean, the truth is, Hank, you could very easily beat me.

Speaker 1 It's not like I've been great this Mount Rostmore. No, you got it.
You're of your song. No, I'm three points ahead of you.
How does the point system work now?

Speaker 1 4-3. 2-1.
4-3-2-1. Okay.
So there's a good chance, Hank, that you could even surpass me this game. That's literally impossible.
No. But you could tie.
Yeah. Yeah, you could tie in this game.

Speaker 1 If you get four points and I get zero points. No, one point.
You get one. You get one for just showing up.
This is like the SAT. Hank said 4-3-2-1-0.
Yeah, he just... But count that.

Speaker 1 Fifth place gets zero. That's a fact.
My first fifth

Speaker 1 rush forward. Fifth place gets zero.
How a snake draft works.

Speaker 1 Okay, what is the order? This is going going to be a trickle. It's going to be getting out of order.
It's going to be Max, me,

Speaker 1 Big Cat, Hank. Okay.
Because Hank went first last time. Now we got to be y'all.
He took boobs. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Feeling boobs.

Speaker 1 We got to be smart here because we're zigzagging across the room.

Speaker 2 We're going to mess up 1,000%.

Speaker 2 Yes.

Speaker 1 Yes. All right.
So, Max, you're up first. I am first.
Max is like, do you feel?

Speaker 1 You feel good about making it not competitive? It's not fun. I mean, it's not.
Where was his last summer?

Speaker 1 You didn't let me pick anything last summer. Yeah, actually, that's a great point.
I didn't even realize that you had the best Mount Rushmore picker on your team last year. You still lost.

Speaker 2 Hank was going for one week. I think I got first every time.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 And since you've already clinched, you can open up the book here. How do you go about making your relatable selections? I don't know.
Meatballs. If you have a chance to take meatballs, take meatballs.

Speaker 1 Yeah, just every other food. A draft is a food draft.
Like, the big boys are going to eat. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Max.

Speaker 1 You're still blaming food drafts. Yeah.
We haven't done a food draft in so long. It's a month and a half.
You took feeling boobs, number one. He said, like, it's a bad thing to do.

Speaker 2 Okay. Things that are difficult to explain.
First pick, the female anatomy.

Speaker 1 Oh, good pick.

Speaker 1 Including boobs. Yeah.
Good pick. Sure.
Sure.

Speaker 1 Female anatomy. That's a good pick.
Would you have done that one, one? No. We're at camp, so you just heard over the loudspeaker.
We'll probably cut that, but we have announcements.

Speaker 1 We actually woke up this morning. Corey was over the loudspeaker waking us up, being like, Food is ready.
He said, breakfast has been canceled due to lack of hustle.

Speaker 1 Okay, we have tea.

Speaker 1 That would have been a good quote, movie quote. All right.
Yep.

Speaker 1 My first overall. Hmm.

Speaker 1 Well,

Speaker 1 this is hard. No, my first overall, Hank.
My personal overall. He said his first overall.
Hank, shut the fuck up.

Speaker 1 This is hard because I've got a lot of different ones on here. I have no idea.
I'd hope you'd have a lot of different ones. I have no idea how to rank them, though.
That's my problem.

Speaker 1 Go goofy style. Okay, I'll go goofy style.
Yeah, you're clinched. Okay,

Speaker 1 first overall, for me, I'm going to go with how money works. Ooh, good one.
How money works slash finance. Yeah.

Speaker 1 No idea. No idea.

Speaker 1 Where does money come from? And why is it valuable?

Speaker 1 I think it's because you say it's valuable. Then I also agree that it's valuable.
So it's valuable. How money works.
Yep.

Speaker 1 Big cat. My pick.
The universe.

Speaker 1 So you're taking everything.

Speaker 1 I guess the technical pick could be

Speaker 1 I

Speaker 1 having a hard time explaining just what my pick is because it's so confusing.

Speaker 1 The Big Bang? Are you talking about the start?

Speaker 1 God, how big the universe is is so hard to explain. I watched a video the other day where they zoomed out.

Speaker 1 That will fuck you up. For a while.
Are you talking about watching the Grateful Dead at the Sphere?

Speaker 1 No, kind of similar, but it was yeah it was like it showed it was uh someone sitting on a beach in california and then zoomed out so that actually does sound like the sphere zoomed out and then just kept on zooming out and it's like here's our milky way or here's our universe here's the milky way then there's millions and i feel like they just make that shit up though i don't know dude it's it's do you a new universe drops like every other week but like and who's deciding that but when you think about it it does not hurt your brain i had outer space so it's like yeah kind of similar yeah it's like yeah i guess the technology the infinite freaks me out.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Thinking about something as infinite makes the infinite space of the universe.
Well, here's the thing is the universe is not infinite. There's like an end to the universe, and it's expanding.

Speaker 1 It's getting bigger. Yeah, but it's behind.
See that there? See that? Yeah.

Speaker 1 You're trying to do things being behind us. Yeah, right? See, I think this is a good pick because we don't know.
The universe

Speaker 1 is finite, but it's getting bigger. Yeah.

Speaker 1 There's like me during football season? Yes. And there might also be multiple other universes.
Got it. And in other universes.

Speaker 1 But we're

Speaker 1 Milky Way is a galaxy, and then that's in a what? Milky Way is a candy bar. In what? What is the Milky Way in? My pantry.

Speaker 1 No, the Milky Way is a galaxy that's in the universe, but I think the Milky Way galaxy is part of a cluster of galaxies.

Speaker 1 Yeah, in the, and then there's another, like, then that's all a cluster, and there's another cluster, and there's like, this is just one of those things that, If you don't think that there's other life somewhere, you're crazy.

Speaker 1 You're crazy. Okay.

Speaker 1 did you have that on there hank nope oh so you got it down pat yeah i mean i don't who knows if it even exists

Speaker 1 this might not exist simulation um

Speaker 1 i will go with sight to a blind person

Speaker 1 okay have you been doing that recently have you ever tried to do that no have you i've been with blind people and tried to explain i've had moments where i've said things out loud and they've been like oh you don't have no idea what i'm talking about.

Speaker 1 That's kind of mean. Yeah.
Well, no, I know. It's like you were like, Yeah, like what were you explaining? You're like, Oh, look at that.
Blind

Speaker 1 those boobs. No, like we, like, we had a kid in our old office in Boston that was like, he could kind of see, but not really.
And then I was explaining blindmike project.net.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and I was telling him a story. Shout out to you.
Oh, you have no idea what I'm saying because you can't really see. You're like,

Speaker 1 Mike, I totally dunked. Yeah.
Missed it.

Speaker 1 And then I will go with

Speaker 1 the taste of water.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 All right. Good pick.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 What does water taste like? You tell me.

Speaker 1 Explain it to me. It tastes like life.
It tastes clean. What's clean?

Speaker 1 I don't know what the taste of water is.

Speaker 1 Honestly, the freakiest thing I ever saw a human do was Jeff D. Lowe taking five different types of water.
from five different bottled water companies.

Speaker 1 And then we wrote the names of them on the bottom of the cups. And he went blindly and took five for five, just on taste alone.
And then he did it again. That's insane.
Yeah, he's a freak. Yeah.

Speaker 1 He is a freak.

Speaker 1 Okay. My pick.

Speaker 1 Is it? Yeah.

Speaker 1 I don't know. It's a good bit.

Speaker 1 I don't, I, I can never explain or I mean, I don't know how it works. Uh,

Speaker 1 big airplanes, how they fly. I don't get it.
I'll never get it. Frost is all people say.
The pilots pilots don't even know dude i saw uh

Speaker 1 there was a picture where like it was all the fuel that's in a 747 it's all in the wings and it's like so much fuel i don't get how they get that in the air yeah it takes like i don't know 45 minutes an hour sometimes just to put all that fuel into the plane crazy the same thing with with like aircraft carriers how they float yeah

Speaker 1 that's a pic you could take i could take that i did read a thread about that the other day and everyone was just like water displacement

Speaker 1 okay, what does that mean?

Speaker 1 If the space of the ship moves out water that is heavier than that space the ship is.

Speaker 1 I don't know. Don't understand.
Don't understand.

Speaker 1 Never will understand that.

Speaker 1 Just say magic. Yeah, planes fly magically.

Speaker 1 Is it my turn?

Speaker 1 Hank?

Speaker 1 Yes, it is. Okay.
My second pick, I'm going to take the rules of craps.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 I've had the rules of craps explained to me probably 10 or 11 times in my life. I've forgotten them 10 or 11 times in my life.
I've played craps. I think that's just because you were drunk.
Yes, yes.

Speaker 1 I was definitely drunk. But that's not the point, Hank.
The point is, it's hard to explain. And it's harder to understand.
Yes. Well, yes.
Well, it's always in the setting of being drunk.

Speaker 1 It was that hard to explain. They wouldn't put it in every casino in the world.

Speaker 1 Fair counterpoint. Fair counterpoint.
A lot of people hate craps. Yeah,

Speaker 1 a lot of people do, but they're all drunk and they all just had the rules explained to them that night. And the next day, you ever go to a craps table in the morning?

Speaker 1 There's nobody there because nobody knows how to play in the morning.

Speaker 1 True. True.
Okay, Max. He's probably going to have some awesome pick right now.
I'm going to go with the NFL cat.

Speaker 1 Yep, that's a good one. Good pick.

Speaker 1 I think Max is key is that he also picks things that are less words. Yeah.
So the graphic always is bigger. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Meatballs, boobs.

Speaker 2 It's simple.

Speaker 2 I have a simple mind, simple brain, simple graphic.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Simple minds.

Speaker 2 Going off of that, one word. We've talked about it on this show.

Speaker 1 Are you going one word? Yep, calculus. Oh,

Speaker 1 yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I had that on my list.

Speaker 1 Hand up. I actually don't know what calculus is.
Nope. No,

Speaker 1 I just know it's the math that comes with the most expensive books.

Speaker 1 We've said it before, I've never even met calculus. No, no one's even shown me a calculus.
Goodwill hunting. That's as close as I gotta cut.
Calculator is about as close as I've gotten to calculate.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 1 You could show me a math formula. I wouldn't be able to tell you if it's calculus or two plus two.

Speaker 1 What?

Speaker 2 A squared plus b squared equals c squared. That's

Speaker 1 y equals mx equals b.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I'm just saying letters.

Speaker 1 Those are equations. Yeah, they are.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 I feel like calculus is one of those things that smart people made up. They just invented a puzzle for themselves to teach other smart people so they could all feel smart.
Yeah. Oh, it's PFT.
Sorry.

Speaker 1 Oh, it's not Hank's turn?

Speaker 1 It's PFT. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Okay, we got lost. I was wrong.
We got lost in the snake. I was wrong.

Speaker 1 I'm going to go with...

Speaker 1 Hmm. Good pick.

Speaker 1 This is very difficult for me.

Speaker 1 What a catch is. Yep.
In football. Yep.
Okay. No one knows.
We still know.

Speaker 1 That is true. They change it all the time.

Speaker 1 That's a good pick. That's a good pick.
I had a football one. I had two football ones.

Speaker 1 Kind of want to do one of them.

Speaker 1 Yeah. You know what? I'll do one of them.

Speaker 1 It's hard to explain why Matt LaFleur kicked a field goal down eight. It is.
It's really hard to explain. No, it's easy to explain.
It's really fucking hard to explain that. It's very easy to explain.

Speaker 1 He just got dumb for a

Speaker 1 He had a brain fart.

Speaker 1 It sucks that I hate, I like Matt LaFleur as a guy because obviously I hate the team he coaches for, but we really have kind of tortured him.

Speaker 1 Yeah, well, it's out of love because he's not going to make that mistake again.

Speaker 1 If he makes that mistake again, then I don't. I would actually respect it.
Yeah, if he was just like,

Speaker 1 if he was just like, you know what, I want to give the PMT guys a little more fodder. Yeah.
Okay, Hank, you have two picks. I do have two picks.
I have three choices.

Speaker 1 You have three choices and two picks. You want to sound him out? You want to you want to you will do a group help? You want to say all three and we'll pick your best two.
I got my fourth. I'm

Speaker 2 he's still competing with

Speaker 1 your fourth.

Speaker 1 It's not over. This is the coddling of Hank that I talk about.
Yeah. Hank gets the code.
Yeah. Yeah, we're coddling Hank.

Speaker 5 I didn't ask you to do this.

Speaker 1 Big cat just said it. I was coddling.
Yeah, he was coddling you. And then he also lost.

Speaker 1 Oh, well, I could still lose.

Speaker 1 You do do that. Like, it's not that.
I could.

Speaker 1 Technically, I could. Mathematically, mathematically, I could.
Do you say you've clinched if you haven't mathematically clinched? But

Speaker 1 if you're competing, then why are you also coddling? But if you do want to cut him down.

Speaker 1 Because

Speaker 1 you're so bad at this.

Speaker 1 But I can still beat you. That's where it's like, which one is it? If I'm so bad at this, I'm going to be a bitch.
I was like, fuck off, Hank.

Speaker 1 You suck at this, and you're a little bitch all the time about Rush War season. All right, I'm going to go with your dreams.
Bad pick. Your dreams.
Bad pick.

Speaker 1 No, I think you're mistaking that with like the lamest things yeah yeah that was a bad pick things legit a bad pick things your dreams are very easy to explain you're either my teeth fell out or i almost had sex yeah there's it no one wants to hear you explain your dreams yeah that's it because if i'm about to have sex in my dream i'm definitely telling myself like wait this is definitely a dream uh and then i'm gonna you're gonna are you gonna back your pickup no because you guys are gonna say that no matter what no no we're being honest the your dreams are no one wants to hear you explain your dreams explain your dreams

Speaker 1 one of the best movies of all time uh you know christopher no and inception and it's basically the whole concept is how like you know maybe you should have taken the plot

Speaker 1 dreams and then you wake up the next day and it's like you you kind of remember some details but you can't and then you wake up

Speaker 1 the plot of inception would have been very that's exactly interstellar yes i said

Speaker 1 i have my pics you're just gonna tear it down i don't give a sh I don't

Speaker 1 I'm gonna go with

Speaker 1 VAR explaining your dreams is easy VAR

Speaker 1 Also easy. It's basically just like challenging in football.
The camera. The camera comes out right.
All right.

Speaker 1 Honorable mentions. The camera you pick is one of like the most popular casino games in the history of the world.
Yeah. We've been playing since like the 1500s.
Hank, Hank, can you explain it to me?

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's a game on a table. There's rules.
I don't play craps, but it's like if it's hard to explain why the rules are crap. Explain to me your dreams.

Speaker 1 Okay, so sometimes my teeth fall out in my dreams, and that's when you turn your brain off. That's why you do VAR.
Okay, that's when the video does the robot thing and gets it right.

Speaker 1 What's the robot thing? How's the robot thing? The eye in the sky. Hawkeye technology.
What is like the rule, though?

Speaker 1 What are they determining? 1984. There's cameras everywhere.
You pick everything up. Good, thanks.
That was really helpful. I get it now.

Speaker 1 You know exactly what VAR is.

Speaker 1 What is it?

Speaker 1 When a camera that tells you if it's a goal or not. How does it determine it? Because it's a camera.
Is a camera camera like AI? Like it's sentient?

Speaker 1 It's a camera that can see on the field and know when the ball crossed the line.

Speaker 1 Interesting. Yeah, I'm confused still, but that's, I guess it's really easy.
Well, you must be pretty dumb. Yeah, I definitely am.

Speaker 1 Piece of shit.

Speaker 1 That was nice.

Speaker 1 I liked it. I liked that.
I enjoyed that.

Speaker 2 I like how Big Hat and I just kind of tapped out and let you guys go.

Speaker 1 I just got it for like a moment. Hank and shoot

Speaker 1 two gladiators in the ring. Hank and I are locked in a battle for last place.

Speaker 1 My gloves are off.

Speaker 1 What are you typing? Who are you typing to? What are you typing?

Speaker 1 He's Googling crap.

Speaker 1 You're looking up crap for us because you don't know.

Speaker 1 No,

Speaker 1 I'm looking up

Speaker 1 Big Hat to ask, talking about VAR. Oh, I mean, VAR is just, yeah.
It's easy. It's very easy.

Speaker 1 What are you looking up, Hank? Nothing. Honorable mentions? Well, I mean, now we still got got picks on this.

Speaker 2 I guess Big Hen, you just don't want us to pick.

Speaker 1 Oh, I forgot. Yeah, yeah.
Okay.

Speaker 1 All right. My last pick.

Speaker 1 I got to get a good one. I screw up my last picks every time.

Speaker 1 Oh.

Speaker 1 Internet jokes slash memes to non-internet people. Yeah, like when we were talking about very

Speaker 1 and big justice the other day. Yes.
And we realized that very quickly, this is a conversation that needs to stay between a man and a screen.

Speaker 1 And the internet, yeah, because if you just go out of, there's a lot of people, a lot of people listening to this right now who don't have Twitter, Instagram. They're not

Speaker 1 just scrolling all day like we are. And then when you have a conversation with them, it's.
I had one where

Speaker 1 I had to explain to people Big Mike. Yeah.
So if you know who Big Mike is, you know who Big Mike is. And people are like, what are you talking about?

Speaker 1 I was like, yeah, no, it's a big thing. Big Mike.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 2 mine's actually kind of similar to that.

Speaker 1 Wait, oh, what you're not up, Matt.

Speaker 1 Oh, damn.

Speaker 1 We get Hank. Hank is tapped out, by the way.

Speaker 1 Anyone who's listening to pardon my take for the first time, this is when Hank taps out. I'm thinking about getting real political in my last pick here.
Thanks, Hank. Real political.

Speaker 1 I liked your dream pick. I just had to shit on it.

Speaker 1 I think dreams are very easy to do. He's not giving me eye contact.

Speaker 1 Okay, so for my last one, I'm going to take take

Speaker 1 wind.

Speaker 1 Good pick. Yeah, that's a good pick.

Speaker 1 Break it down, Hink.

Speaker 1 The Earth. Yeah.
Yeah, tell me about wind. We're spinning really fast.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 So wind only, it always comes in one direction. Yeah.
Fuck, wind was a bad pick, actually. No, I don't.

Speaker 1 I think wind's, it's not going to look good. Wind doesn't pop.

Speaker 1 Wind probably doesn't pop. It doesn't pop.
Max probably has something that's going to pop.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's gonna pop big time i do have one that could pop but i'm gonna i'm gonna go more niche because it's because you're just running up the score on us uh yeah

Speaker 2 basically um so i'm just gonna go with our job to someone who doesn't who doesn't know barstool good one i had good one but it would have popped i mean that's not gonna look good on a on a graphic because it's literally only hard for us to explain

Speaker 1 and it's also people voting know what barstool is correct yeah but you can just say you i just i just say like if someone if i don't want to have the conversation i just say I do like or not anymore But I'll just say I still say it to get out of the conversation like just you know video production video and audio production

Speaker 1 We say when like oh yeah, like there's a little you know like we just do some try to explain what we're doing like right this week To someone who like doesn't understand why would you be explaining that like why would they be like people ask what you do and then I'm like like a podcast and they say like oh as like a hobby.

Speaker 1 Yeah. And I'm like, no, I actually make money.

Speaker 2 They're like, he's just trying to, for other people's pics to be bad.

Speaker 1 Yeah, there's nothing more. Oh, I mean, that's a bad pick on the ground.
Video production is.

Speaker 1 It's pretty easy to be like, oh, yeah, I just do like video and audio production. I'm like, oh, yeah, you know, like, you know, the pizza guy, like, yeah.

Speaker 1 There's nothing more embarrassing. The pizza guy? Yeah, you know.

Speaker 1 I just basically say, you know, Ms. Peaches? I work for her daddy.

Speaker 1 Yeah. I'm Ms.
Peach's assistant. Yeah.
Like, oh, yeah, that makes sense. Writing down podcaster on occupation on like a customs form coming into the United States is tough.
A customs form?

Speaker 1 How about like a fucking elementary school form for your kid? That's the worst. I'm just like smut bloggerslash podcast.
Yeah, you're like, I'm a podcaster like free lunch then? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 What honorable mentions? Hank. A color.
Is that what you were going to decide between? Yeah. Actually,

Speaker 1 that would have been an awesome pick. Then dreams.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 I'm not going to let you switch. That might even

Speaker 1 be the wind. Okay.
I know.

Speaker 2 I was going to say the afterlife. That was going to be my one that would death.

Speaker 1 That would pop on. Yeah, death.
Death to a child, how babies get made to a child.

Speaker 1 I had, this one was a niche one, but trying to explain to someone that you can't dunk from the free throw line while shooting a free throw. Impossible.
It's really hard to do.

Speaker 1 I had that you can't tackle the quarterback playing tackle football. Yep.

Speaker 1 Rules of baseball. Yeah, I had batting average.
Yep. New kickoff rules.
Tax average.

Speaker 1 Batting average is so easy. Batting average is easy.
Explain it to me.

Speaker 1 If you bat 10 times and you get three hits. You understand fractions.
In seven outs, you're batting 300.

Speaker 1 Isn't there more to it than that? No. You're thinking of it.
If you get a walk, it doesn't count as a

Speaker 1 purpose. Or would you get it? Yeah, you have to go out.
No, you're saying, I'm going to pitch 10 balls to you, and if you get three hits, your batting average would be 300. I'm thinking of slugging.

Speaker 1 You have to get on base.

Speaker 2 Slugging is still pretty easy.

Speaker 1 It's more like war. Hits.
Well, yeah, you'd have to get a hit to get on base. Slugging is three bases per at bat.
Well, I'm glad I didn't take batting average.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that would have been a horrible, horrible thing.

Speaker 1 That would have been one of the worst things.

Speaker 1 When Hank says, do you not understand fractions, that's how you know that you fucked up.

Speaker 1 Here's one that I was trying to, I was thinking about, and I was, I think there's something there, but it'd be hard to, but

Speaker 1 it's hard to explain to people that you're not triggered online. Because the minute you say you're not triggered online, you're triggered online.
I'm not owned. Yeah, right.

Speaker 1 So it's by definition, it's hard to explain it. Because people are like, yeah, you are.
You're responding to me right now.

Speaker 1 I had taxes. Explaining emotions via text.
Yeah, emojis. That's what they're.
No, but like, if someone would be like, oh, like, you're mad.

Speaker 1 And it's like, I just sent, like, I sent a text message with no,

Speaker 1 there's no emotions to this text message. Charge deciding that.

Speaker 2 Well, that's specifically you. What do you mean? You give off.

Speaker 2 Multiple people have told you that you give off asshole vibes over text.

Speaker 1 I just give short answers. Yeah, yeah, you do.
I think that's you. So if someone asks a question, like, yes, and they'll be like, why were you mad?

Speaker 1 You say yes, period, though. No, I don't.
Yeah, you do. You think I'm adding extra grammar? No.
That's true. That's a good point.
I did have the plot to interstellar. No, people just decide.

Speaker 1 But Hank is emotional. Yeah,

Speaker 1 you're a big, okay, yes guy.

Speaker 2 Okay, is one that's.

Speaker 1 A big time okay guy. Hey, we're going to do this.
Okay.

Speaker 4 But you could be like, yeah, that's fine. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Like, that's still if you like say a sentence. No, this is getting Hank can't exist.
No, it's not a means to an end. No, no, no, no.

Speaker 1 If I said to you, like, hey, let's, or if you said to me, like, hey, the plan today is we're going to do this, this, and this, I just write back, okay, that does feel a different vibe.

Speaker 1 It does. That sounds good versus okay is different.
Yeah. No, it's not.
That sounds great. That's great.
Yeah. Yeah.
Sounds great. We're right.
Yeah. Okay.

Speaker 2 We could poll every single person at this company and everyone would be like, yeah, I don't know if Hank likes me over text.

Speaker 1 Replying just okay definitely gives a vibe of like,

Speaker 1 okay, fine. You know what, Hank says? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay, fine. Yeah.
That's no, do you hear how I said it? Yeah, but like, that's you're deciding that. That's what I'm saying.
All right, tell me the plan today.

Speaker 1 You're going to do the yak, then we're going to draft teams for Cam Barswell. Then we're going to do the first field day stream activity for Mountain New.
Okay.

Speaker 1 Yeah, if you said it like that. That's how you say it.
Or say it again. Say it again.

Speaker 1 We're going to do the Yak. We're going to draft teams.
We're going to do the... That sounds great, exclamation point.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 That would be that you're sarcastic. Fuck off.

Speaker 1 Hank, you seem like the kind of guy that would put the dot dot like two periods after okay.

Speaker 1 Okay, dot dot. You're basically rolling your eyes at me.
It's it's okay. Texting is a means to an end.
Uh, all right, other honorable messages. I had a lot of

Speaker 1 mentions. I probably should have taken.
I had uh

Speaker 1 trying to explain that you went to the strip club but you didn't get a lap dance

Speaker 1 or go to the back room, you just went there with the guys. Why other people did

Speaker 1 why you liked an Instagram post?

Speaker 1 Well, that one's pretty easy.

Speaker 1 It was just LeBron. It's big tense.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Artificial intelligence? Yep. Black holes.

Speaker 1 That you're not paranoid, they're just out to get you. Very hard thing to explain.
Really, really hard thing to explain to people. Love?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 The number zero. Yep.

Speaker 1 What about that the CIA is behind a lot of shit?

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's you just said it, though. Yeah, but like

Speaker 1 what I just said, I said a lot of shit. It's more than that.
I actually think the CIA is behind so much shit that they're behind the idea that the CIA is behind everything.

Speaker 1 So now you think the CIA is super powerful. Right.

Speaker 1 That the Bears have never had a 4,000-yard passer in over 100 years of playing. You know, Jason Campbell almost had that? Yeah.
Cutler was close and he got hurt.

Speaker 2 I almost said Ben Mintz. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Oh, that's a good one.

Speaker 1 Magnets.

Speaker 1 Yep. How do they work?

Speaker 1 Yeah, Rico Bosco would be another one. I had both of them on.
Yeah, hard to explain.

Speaker 2 Those are the two Barcelona employees I had on my list.

Speaker 1 How Pete Carroll didn't run with Marshawn on the one-yard line. Tough to explain.
That's very hard to explain. Very hard to explain.
Good pick there. The new kickoff rules.
Yep.

Speaker 1 Said that like four times.

Speaker 1 Oh, man.

Speaker 1 You have. Am I wrong? You want to explain them? No, I'm saying I just, you clearly don't understand that.

Speaker 2 What if after you clinch Big Cat, we just let them go?

Speaker 1 Yeah, yes, yes. I think that would be.
If I clinch it, we'll go Monoimano. We'll just do our audible mentions after.
We can do it as. Yeah.
We'll do it post-cat. Hell in the cell.

Speaker 1 We'll put him in an actual scene.

Speaker 1 Put him in the gulag. It's like a post-crown scene.
Yep.

Speaker 1 For every part of the film.

Speaker 1 They should have to pick eight.

Speaker 1 Yes. Oh, that would be fun.
Oh, but I don't know if Hank can stretch. You can't stretch.

Speaker 1 Hank is like a shitty middle reliever. He can maybe give you one and two-thirds innings.
If you make him stretch out to five innings,

Speaker 1 no way. Although, color.

Speaker 1 I can still beat you. Yeah, you can.

Speaker 1 You should have picked color. Color was a great pick color was actually color could have been 1-1

Speaker 1 yeah i'm sure yeah i always

Speaker 1 this is my

Speaker 1 my my my honorable mentions are usually better than my picks yeah

Speaker 1 the way she goes okay any others any other honorable mentions time zones time zones china only having one time zone is crazy that is why it blows my mind every time i see it yep They have one time zone, Max.

Speaker 1 Why doesn't the world just have one time zone? Max? Can you answer me that? They only have one time zone because then people would be like sleeping at

Speaker 1 yeah but that it's just like seasons so you could say like noon here in the united states is midnight in hong kong like that sounds like that sucks they just know that noon is night time

Speaker 1 that sounds terrible it's just one clock for everybody max i'm looking at the like a globe of time zones right yeah china has one time zone because 97 of china is all lives like on the east side

Speaker 1 so got it but there's people people who live all the way out there.

Speaker 1 Yeah, they get screwed. Tibet.
They're just absolutely screwed by the time zones. Free Tibet.
Russia has 11. How does Russia have 11 and China has one?

Speaker 1 Well, China has more, but they just said we only have one. Okay.

Speaker 1 They only acknowledge. They only acknowledge one.
It's like if you built an entire country out of Arizona.

Speaker 2 Yeah. I thought this was one of those, like, Atlanta is closer to what you know.

Speaker 1 The other weird one that I saw the other day is Spain is the same.

Speaker 1 Spain is the same time zone, I think, as like Germany or something. There's something weird with that, where they're like flopped.
There's just weird time zones.

Speaker 1 I think Spain in World War II, the Spanish government wanted to align closer to Germany. They took their time zone.
So Spain is like, you know, you know where Spain is on a map.

Speaker 1 It's right underneath France. Yeah.
And they have different time zones. That's a try-hard move on Spain's part.
Yeah. It's a cuck move.
Yeah. It's like, hey, guys, look at that.

Speaker 1 You're taking another man's time zone. Exactly.
Yeah. That's ridiculous.

Speaker 1 Okay. Good job, guys.
Good Mount Rushmore.

Speaker 1 Good vibes all around. It's one of those things I love whenever we have a big interview because we're about to get to Caleb Williams and maybe some new fans, and they listen to that.
Yep.

Speaker 1 And they're like, I had a friend text me. He was listening to the Mount Rushmore of cheese

Speaker 1 with his wife in the car. Wait, Mount Rushmore of Cheese.
Her son, she yellow, yellow.

Speaker 1 He's making us listen to part of my take where they're arguing over yellow foods and whether certain foods are yellow or gold. Pure gold is a rich orange yellow color.

Speaker 1 It's been going on for 15 minutes.

Speaker 1 The freshest pasta is always yellow. It's still going.

Speaker 1 That's a great one. That is good.

Speaker 1 I just got a text from a random number. Hello, are you Lisa?

Speaker 1 I think I have to be Lisa. No,

Speaker 1 this is a scam.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's Lisa. Yeah, it's Lisa.

Speaker 2 I like how you know it's a scam and you're eating.

Speaker 1 I'm going to scam them right back.

Speaker 1 It's

Speaker 1 all right uh pft let's do

Speaker 1 that and we'll get to kill williams give it up for chicago sebastian maniscalco's new stand-up special it ain't right is coming to hulu on november 21st 30 years ago jeff bezos complete nerd bezos now ripped to shreds on his super yacht and the boxes keep coming

Speaker 8 Sebastian Maniscalco, It Ain't Right, premieres November 21st, streaming on Hulu and Hulu on Disney Plus for bundle subscribers. Terms apply.

Speaker 1 Okay, we now welcome on a very, very, very, very special guest. It is QB1 of the Chicago Bears, Caleb Williams, Heisman Trophy winner.
First of all, Caleb, thank you for joining us.

Speaker 1 I was very close to saying savior of the franchise, but I'm not going to put that on you.

Speaker 1 How's camp going? Let's start with that.

Speaker 3 Camp is good. The defense has been the defense has been challenging me throughout camp, OTAs, all of that.
So it's been great.

Speaker 3 You know, offense, we've been starting to pick it up and it's been fun. Okay.

Speaker 1 I've just been having the Hard Knocks cameras around. Yeah, you don't really notice them.

Speaker 3 They do a pretty good job.

Speaker 3 Other than the times when

Speaker 3 you're having talks and you're like, oh, I got a move mic above my head. But other than that,

Speaker 3 they've been great.

Speaker 1 Did you watch week one of Hard Knocks?

Speaker 3 I I watched the beginning. I haven't gotten back to it.
I watched the, I heard that the Bulls,

Speaker 3 the Bulls introduction was happening, so I went and watched that part. And then one of the nights I had to go to sleep.

Speaker 1 There's some good slow-mo shots of the spirals. Yeah.
That's what we tune in for. We tune in for the sprinklers going on.
We tune in for the spirals.

Speaker 1 They might have gotten mad at me, or not mad at me. They made fun of me because I got triggered because I thought they weren't showing enough touchdown passes.
Okay. So I was defending you.

Speaker 1 I was like,

Speaker 1 let's get some more highlights going.

Speaker 3 Yeah, hopefully this, I think the next episode comes out in a few days. Yeah.
Hopefully in the next episode, we got a few more spirals and touchdowns in there.

Speaker 1 Yeah. So, I mean, you're, you're obviously a very confident guy.
Has the transition, obviously we haven't started the regular season, but the transition to the NFL been what you kind of expected?

Speaker 3 Yeah, I mean, I knew it was going to be challenging. I knew it was a

Speaker 3 offensive-wise, I knew it was a new language for me, a new way of doing things. And so

Speaker 3 just understanding my situation, understanding that the guys are you know they're gonna push me coaches the players

Speaker 3 and then they're also gonna be gracious with me learned that throughout this process and so now just picking up the speed you know getting better with things processing things a lot faster

Speaker 3 checks alerts all of that so it's been great it's been fun it's been challenging but the transition wise you know I've had to move a couple times whether it was transfer from Oklahoma to USC or all of that stuff and so

Speaker 3 yeah it's been it's been it's been a normal transition.

Speaker 1 I feel like people kind of memory hold the whole Oklahoma part of your career because, you know, you were obviously the number one pick for two years, which that's tough because people are going to poke holes in everything.

Speaker 1 But you went to Oklahoma, you weren't the starter, and then you won the starting job halfway through the year.

Speaker 1 And everything I've read, it was like the minute you showed up, there was a story about how at 6 a.m. they wouldn't let freshmen lift, but you basically forced your way in there.

Speaker 1 Has that just been your mindset from the beginning? Like, even if they don't let me come in here, I'm going to go compete. Yeah,

Speaker 3 I would say my mindset has always been, you know, compete ever since I started, you know, ever since I really switched to the position of quarterback around 10 years old.

Speaker 3 I understood that I may have started later than most QBs at that time

Speaker 3 because a lot of QBs in my class have been QBs for their whole life. And so I switched to that and I just was competing versus people.

Speaker 3 I mean, somebody that I was competing versus and training, just working out, working hard, and not actually like QB training was like Blake Corn. And he's unbelievable.

Speaker 3 Like his work ethic and all of that is unbelievable. So,

Speaker 3 you know, just getting in there competing versus people that are older than me, bigger, faster, stronger. And then, you know, when I get to those positions that I've been in with.

Speaker 3 Oklahoma

Speaker 3 and high school, all those other positions that I've been in, just go out there, compete, work my tail off and get after it.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I mean, I want to bring up because winning the job as a freshman with a starter in place, that's a dog mentality. But then you go to USC and everyone's like, oh, LA, soft.

Speaker 1 You know, there's a whole perception there. But I just want to remind people.

Speaker 3 I'm an East Coast kid. You won it.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and you won that starting job as a freshman. Yep.
Yeah. So the story about you deciding I'm going to be a quarterback now.
Yeah. You're playing defense right?

Speaker 1 Yeah, so I was playing back and linebacker.

Speaker 3 A little bit of safety.

Speaker 3 And then we lost a game, lost the FBU game,

Speaker 3 which is, I think, do y'all know what FBU is? No. So it's basically like an all-star team from each region.
Okay. So they have, and state and things like that.

Speaker 3 So they, for us, they had a couple different, because DMV, we kind of bunch everybody together. So

Speaker 3 it was

Speaker 3 an FBU, Maryland national team, team, and we went down. We were whooping up on a bunch of teams.
We lost to actually Harrison Bailey. I think he just left UNLV.
He's a quarterback there.

Speaker 3 But we lost to him, and I didn't like the way we were playing. We were playing kind of daddy ball with

Speaker 3 the coach and the QB on our team. And I switched, and my kind of thing was spread the ball around to everybody, go win games, and

Speaker 3 be a big reason why.

Speaker 1 So you're 10 years old, and you decide, I'm going to be a quarterback now. And was that a complete lifestyle change for you?

Speaker 1 It was more of...

Speaker 3 I was probably.

Speaker 3 I went more into like, all right, like I already decided what I'm going to do. And then I,

Speaker 3 you know, my dad and godfather and all those people kind of put together a plan. And from training to eating to, you know, when I wake up and things like that.

Speaker 1 That's incredible. So you're 10 years old, and you're like, this is my plan to be in the NFL because I did the, I had a plan to be in the NBA when I was 10 years old.
Didn't really work out.

Speaker 1 Like, do you ever think back? Like, we set ourselves to do something at 10 years old and now we're here.

Speaker 3 That's nuts. Yeah, it's nuts.
I do think about it.

Speaker 3 And I don't know if I'm going to classify it as nuts in a way. Like, it's, it's,

Speaker 3 it's a tell, I don't really know the exact word, but, you know, I expected myself to be here, but it is, it is crazy.

Speaker 1 I wake up every day and I'm like, it's, it's got to feel like a superpower that you were able, because like we were joking about it, there was a draft story

Speaker 1 when the draft happened. Like, someone, there was a story about some kid wrote down when he was like eight, I'm going to be in the NFL draft.
And we were joking like every eight-year-old writes down.

Speaker 1 Yeah, there's

Speaker 1 that every day. But there's only a few guys that get drafted.

Speaker 1 So to see that and have that plan, at what point in that plan, like what age were you like, okay, this plan's actually like this is happening?

Speaker 3 It's probably

Speaker 3 after I started training and getting after it. Probably two years after I started training

Speaker 3 is when I was like, okay, this actually, you know, is going to happen, can happen.

Speaker 3 You know, that's when... I started getting to, what was I? I was probably seventh grade, and then I hit eighth grade.
So around ninth grade is when I was like,

Speaker 3 this can really happen because I started getting out there playing with guys that were older than me. All the training was kind of working and things like that.
So I kept all that going and then

Speaker 3 started getting some offers, played well first year of high school. And then the offers and everything started climbing.

Speaker 3 Confidence kept kept rising and growing because of the work that I kept putting in and was putting in before high school and things like that.

Speaker 1 Yeah,

Speaker 1 I read a story about when you were 16, you broke your offensive coordinator's wedding ring. I would imagine that was also a moment that you were like, oh shit, I got a cannon.

Speaker 3 Yeah, so he

Speaker 3 his wife always told him, Don't

Speaker 3 catch footballs with the wedding ring on, wedding band. And he was, he didn't, didn't listen.

Speaker 3 And then one day his hand started bleeding. He looks at it, and he was trying to figure out what happened.
And then I realized that it was cracked a little bit and it was pinching his skin. So

Speaker 1 Homewrecker. Yeah, she's like, what the hell is wrong with this? Homewrecker.

Speaker 1 I read that you had you ate the same meal every day for like four years. Yeah.

Speaker 3 Yeah, yes. Eggs, eggs,

Speaker 3 eggs with ham in it.

Speaker 3 And then I'd have an inshore in my vitamins.

Speaker 1 And how old were you when you started doing this? 10.

Speaker 3 So that's when everything started.

Speaker 1 So not Buffalo Wings and ice cream.

Speaker 3 Not Buffalo Wings and ice cream.

Speaker 1 What about candy? You're a candy guy?

Speaker 3 I love candy, actually.

Speaker 1 Everyone has to have a vice, right?

Speaker 3 Yeah, that's my vice.

Speaker 3 Not big into all the other stuff or do any of that stuff. And so

Speaker 3 candy was my getaway. I'm a bad bad in video games.

Speaker 1 I like that. Yeah, I'm a big food guy myself.
And

Speaker 1 if I had seen Coach Riley's brisket before I went to Oklahoma, I would never have gone. That thing is good.
It was actually pretty good, though.

Speaker 3 It was pretty good. It was pretty good.

Speaker 1 Usually this is your coach. No, no, no, no.
No,

Speaker 3 we give Coach Riley some shit.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but it was actually a good thing. That was a pretty good picture.

Speaker 3 But that wasn't one we ate. We ate one that he, another one that he cooked.
And

Speaker 3 it looked good.

Speaker 1 He violated rule number one of the internet, which is don't post a picture. Don't post a picture.
Yeah, ever. Never put your meat online.
Ever.

Speaker 1 ever people are gonna roast it don't put your meat online it's gonna be a problem yeah number one rule don't put your meat online so you're

Speaker 1 so your transfer from oklahoma to usc i have a a very specific question that is gonna make me feel like a fool uh i went to wisconsin okay uh there was the wisconsin story of yeah rumors and stuff was there any truth to it ever so my best friend and his dad so what dean Ingram was at Wisconsin.

Speaker 3 Right. And his dad was a coach.

Speaker 3 And so we reached out to them. We were trying to just you know get the vibe and and and and see what was going on how it was up there or whatever or over there um and all of that um

Speaker 3 and and you know somehow it caught it caught wind that i was you know in contact with them which i'm i'm i'm consistently in contact with with those two um because i've i've grown up with them so um but somehow it caught wind and and and it blew up on instagram but it wasn't like it wasn't too huge it was never really cool it was never too yeah it wasn't it wasn't too crazy Was there any like Badger fans like DMing you still?

Speaker 3 Yeah, there were a lot of Badger fans.

Speaker 1 Any like 37-year-olds DMing a 20-year-old being like, hey, we could sell a lot of t-shirts? Probably?

Speaker 1 Probably. Yeah, I did that.

Speaker 1 It was pretty embarrassing for me, especially because in my heart of hearts, I was like, he's never going to go to Wisconsin. But I still shot off a couple DMs being like, dude,

Speaker 1 we could sell some t-shirts. Yeah.

Speaker 3 Yeah. No, it.

Speaker 1 I fell a little short on the end.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it fell a little short.

Speaker 3 I don't think it was going to happen in the end, but

Speaker 3 much respect to the Badger fans. Okay.
Okay.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you tried. Yeah, I tried.
I tried my best. And I did feel.
I just wanted to. That was the best thing to do.

Speaker 1 For the record, I felt weird DMing you out of the blue, being like, hey, man, you should come to Wisconsin. We could sell like over 100 t-shirts.

Speaker 1 It was a low point, but I was trying anything. That's all right.
But now you're here.

Speaker 1 We're here. Yeah.

Speaker 1 So I'm excited.

Speaker 1 Do you, I've seen your quotes, but you're basically like, listen, the history, the past is the past. I'm here to be myself.

Speaker 1 Has anyone explained to you the history of Chicago Bears quarterbacks?

Speaker 3 I just know that there have never been

Speaker 3 4,000 and a 30-plus touchdown pass and things like that.

Speaker 1 It's an insult meme that goes around

Speaker 3 all the time. I always see the edits of like all 31.

Speaker 1 Yeah. And then there's 30.

Speaker 1 Yeah. So I think you got to change that.
Yeah, we got to get ready to do it.

Speaker 3 We'll try and change that. We got the guys to do it.

Speaker 1 I saw when you had the quote, like, my job is to rewrite history, and people are like, oh, he's so cocky. I was like, no, it actually shouldn't be that hard.
That's my job. That is my job.

Speaker 1 They brought me here for reasons. Yeah.

Speaker 3 Because if they

Speaker 3 had people like Aaron Rodgers or anything like that, I mean, it wouldn't be the, it wouldn't be.

Speaker 1 Well, not him. He's

Speaker 3 yeah, sorry.

Speaker 1 That's okay.

Speaker 3 So he's with the Jets now, so it doesn't really care.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we don't care anymore. Yeah.

Speaker 3 But we had people like that in a history and a lineage

Speaker 3 of QBs QBs that were ripping it up in this later stage

Speaker 3 of the NFL where they were throwing it 30 times a game, then that would be the case. But it hasn't been the case.

Speaker 3 They obviously bring people in like Keenan and DJ and myself and all the offensive linemen, D-line people to change history.

Speaker 1 Do you ever like, what's the line between cocky and confidence? Because I feel like you get accused of being cocky when it's everything I've read, all the stories.

Speaker 1 It's like, no, he's just supremely confident in himself, which why wouldn't you want a guy who's confident in himself?

Speaker 3 Yeah, I think the difference is knowing yourself. I also think the difference is

Speaker 3 the people around you,

Speaker 3 you know, and how hard you work. I think those are the three biggest things.
And I think the biggest part is the people around you.

Speaker 3 And the second one is probably how hard you work.

Speaker 3 And I say that one first because the people around you, you got to have the right people around you to tell you when it's time to, all right like you know you're pushing a little bit you're doing this and that like you know you have people around you as as no people um as as they say and and and not yes men and yes women um so having people around me like that and then um getting after it um always you know hard work always builds confidence and uh hard work always pays off it always you know at the end of it gives you a yeah a check mark yeah i'm i'm i'm glad that you're post-draft because leading up to the draft it felt like that that took a long time to get there there were all, you know, a lot of bullshit out there.

Speaker 1 Yeah, there was a lot.

Speaker 3 There was a lot of bullshit.

Speaker 1 The anonymous scouts, you had one scout, or I think it was a GM compared to you to Prince, but like that's

Speaker 1 the greatest.

Speaker 1 When we saw it, I was just I don't get that one just because I yeah, he picked the worst, like, was like, wait, he's going to be the Prince of quarterbacks, sign me up. Yeah.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I mean, I actually saw that. Yeah.
I actually think I saw you say it popped up on my Explore page or something.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I didn't, I mean, it was a lot of bullshit out there.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I've been defending I wasn't afraid of Prince, even before. It's the nicest thing that you're doing.

Speaker 3 I didn't mind being compared to Prince because he's.

Speaker 1 It's a great compliment. You're going to change your name to just the Lombardi trophy at some point.
If someone said we were the Prince of Podcasters, I'd be like, awesome. Yeah.
The revolution.

Speaker 1 Incredible. So was there ever a moment, though, where the stories were getting, I mean, at one point, everybody was like, Caleb Williams wants to own the Bears.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I mean, and I trolled a little bit.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 3 I mean, I was bored. I had so much free time.
I was just chilling in my room or working out.

Speaker 3 And so it was just like, I'm going to step in every once in a while and just kind of see if you want to mix it up a little bit.

Speaker 1 You should mix it up. You had one of our coworkers, you made them change their profile picture.

Speaker 3 His name Jack? Yeah, Jack.

Speaker 1 You just replied to him. You're like, your profile picture is crazy.
And then he changed the internet. He was just like, it was a kill shot.
Yeah.

Speaker 3 Well, he always, he always,

Speaker 3 I've actually, since high school,

Speaker 3 he's responded to a couple of my stuff. So I was joking with him.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 The pink cell phone at, you were watching Juju play.

Speaker 3 i actually do not i think my cell phone's over there is it still pink i no i actually broke my pink cell phone oh on accident so so what are we doing so i have a black i have to get a new one actually

Speaker 1 right now it's black okay i'm trying to get a new pink one okay yeah the phone was pink though everything else was not pink wait the case was pink or the phone was the phone is pink oh that's actually cool that seems like a color it's a pink iphone hey listen are you getting another one i'm trying to all right then i will too i had a red one for a while it went hard and so it's so it's yeah they got they got cool colors yeah yeah and this yellow and blue and all this other stuff don't apologize no i didn't apologize yeah you're holding the pink phone and then jack maguire jack max cfb says pink phone is crazy not gonna lie yeah and i said you say your profile or i think your profile pink is uh crazy not gonna lie he changed it and then he changed it

Speaker 1 yeah i didn't see that i just saw that thank you for your service yes yeah the stories before the draft it was just like what every week it was like it was something new how can we poke holes in caleb williams is seemingly what was put out there but there are rumors like you didn't want to go to Chicago at some point.

Speaker 1 But was there a team going into that last season that if they had the number one pick overall, you decided that you didn't want to be in that situation? I don't know.

Speaker 3 I think within the NFL, I think they've done a good job, you know,

Speaker 3 of whether it's the owners and the coaches and the things like that.

Speaker 3 I wasn't against going home, as people said also throughout the process. It was just, it was going to be,

Speaker 3 it would be like KD you know Katie didn't really want to go home and it wasn't because necessarily the the team or anything like that was more of the like everybody in my family is there and you know you buy a lot of tickets to a game family or it's the family that's not family that I've known for so long or been around or haven't known or the new family that everybody talks about so it was more or less having to deal with all of that and make it a huge distraction for me and you know take away from the thing that I enjoy doing I love doing every single day I would have been happy with that I'm a I'm a commander's fan from Northern Virginia myself.

Speaker 1 They've been doing a great job. Yeah, they've been doing a great job recently.
I think it worked out well. I think you've got a great home here.
I think Jaden's going to be a great quarterback, too.

Speaker 1 So I told Big Cat, it's cool with me if you guys win six Super Bowls. I'll take three.
I'm not going to be greedy. It's very nice of you.

Speaker 1 I hope it works out for both of us, and we all get to look back on this.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I think things turned out well for you. So now that you're playing football, you mentioned all the guys that you have to throw the ball to.
Yeah. There's just one ball.
It's just one ball.

Speaker 1 It's just one ball. Always is.
So you've got three excellent receivers. Yep.
Well, and Cole Komet. And Cole Komet.
And DeAndre Swift. Yep.
How are you going to stream? Gerald Everett.

Speaker 1 How are you going to keep them all happy? Gerald Everett's beast. You're going to keep them all happy with just one ball?

Speaker 2 Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 3 I wouldn't say it's easy. It's obviously, you know, it's going to be the fun part about it.
Within the coaches and us scheming it up.

Speaker 3 And with us also understanding early in the games and things like that, get your guys a ball, keep them engaged.

Speaker 3 And then when it's time to go win games, all these guys also understand when it's time to go win games, it's time to go win win games, you know?

Speaker 3 So which that means out of halftime and things like that.

Speaker 3 It's, you know, who gets the ball, go make plays. Let's go win this game.

Speaker 3 But early in the game, it's important to one, scheme up and then two, you know, figure out what the defense is doing, what they're going to be doing for the game.

Speaker 3 And then three, you know, where, at what points can you get your guys the ball in easy touches?

Speaker 1 Yeah. Just blame coach.
Just be like, sorry, DJ. Coach told me.
Yeah. Well, I assume all those guys, too, none of them ever been like, I'm not open right now.
They all.

Speaker 3 No, they're always like they're open, which is, I mean, you want, that's what you want. You want guys that's like, throw me the ball, I'm open.

Speaker 3 But we also have to have an understanding of like,

Speaker 3 you know, I have reads, I have progressions. I have, you know, I saw this.
I didn't like how you ran this.

Speaker 3 We didn't agree on the same page. We weren't, you know, I was hesitant on your route, so I moved on, you know, things like that.
But also

Speaker 3 constant and open communication with the guys is also important so that we can always be on the same page and keep growing.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 So I don't, you, you haven't signed up for this, but but I've signed myself up for it. I'm McCaleb Williams Protector Online.
I appreciate it.

Speaker 1 And I'm just wondering if there's anything that I need to like any, you know, standard lines, like people do the fingernails, like who cares? Like you can't.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I'm going to do it this year.

Speaker 1 So oh, you are?

Speaker 3 Yeah, I just haven't done it for, I try to do it for games

Speaker 3 or like, you know, regular season, things like that, playoffs. Also, because I've been doing it for so long now, I'm trying to like make sure I can do it for games because I've run out of ideas.

Speaker 1 So what should should I say to people? Just being like, mind your own business? I mean, should I do it for games?

Speaker 3 I mean, I think Prince paid his nails, right?

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah, that's facts. Okay.

Speaker 1 I mean, put the F-word on there.

Speaker 3 I will not be doing that.

Speaker 1 Roger Goodell would have

Speaker 1 some things to say.

Speaker 3 Yeah, he'd have some things to say. I'm trying to keep, you know, good-spirited things on my nails.

Speaker 1 But if it fires you up, right? It does fire me up.

Speaker 3 All right, so that's the answer I'm going to say.

Speaker 1 It fires you up.

Speaker 3 I can use other stuff that'll fire me up.

Speaker 1 Okay. All right.

Speaker 3 I can. Yeah.

Speaker 1 There's other things that can be worth it. So what about words? Maybe some acronyms, maybe? Maybe some acronyms.
Maybe S-M-D-G-B. SMDGB.
Yeah, I like that.

Speaker 1 I don't know what that means. I just

Speaker 1 came up with those letters.

Speaker 1 What about the people always like, oh, well, he cried after a loss? Like, dude, guys can't cry. And also, you know,

Speaker 1 like, I want myself to be able to do that.

Speaker 3 I mean, if I want to, if I, if when we win the Super Bowl, you know, at some point, I'm hoping that we have multiple people out there crying tears of joy. So when I lose, I know how.

Speaker 3 important it is at these games that we win and and lose.

Speaker 3 So trying to win every game is what we go go out there to do. It's why we're here now.
It's why we have practice throughout the week.

Speaker 3 So if, you know, teardrop, you know, it's also, you know, there's a time and a place for it. But, you know, if a teardrops, I mean,

Speaker 3 it's how much I care for to win and lose.

Speaker 1 Right. It means that you care.
I would much rather someone have that emotion than laughing at no emotion. Or laughing at it.
Yeah. Or yeah.
Or like just being like, I don't care.

Speaker 1 I'm just getting paid. Yeah.

Speaker 1 With the Super Bowl thing, this is very important. Are you planning on wearing a visor?

Speaker 1 This is very important. Are you going to be wearing a visor in your face? If you take anything away from this interview, this is the most important part.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I don't switch. I wouldn't need to switch unless it was like rainy.

Speaker 1 Okay. All right, good, good.

Speaker 9 It'll be indoors.

Speaker 1 No quarterback with the visor has ever won a Super Bowl. Oh, that's sick.
I didn't know if you knew that.

Speaker 1 Also, long hair. I don't know how long you're going to get your hair.

Speaker 3 Yeah, it's going to be long.

Speaker 1 How long?

Speaker 3 It'd be pretty long. However long it's going to grow.

Speaker 1 Let's cut it right where the Super Bowl winning is. That's the length.

Speaker 1 That's why I've never won a Super Bowl. These are the analytics that we go through, yeah.

Speaker 3 What about the people with short hair, though?

Speaker 1 They win. They've

Speaker 1 won a lot of Super Bowls.

Speaker 3 yeah think about tomorrow what about the ones that lost uh they have they have lost

Speaker 1 his one super bowl when he when he had one of his super bowls when he had long hair when he had long hair and same with big ben yeah big ben when big ben had a visor too in the super bowl that he lost yeah these are these are really important things got it yeah yeah no i want you to think you know football we know football twice about it though yeah okay yeah yeah yeah we're just gonna go out there and and and Run the score up.

Speaker 3 Okay.

Speaker 1 I respect that. I like that.
What about the Notre Dame game? People love to talk about the Notre Dame.

Speaker 3 People love talking about it.

Speaker 1 It's crazy. One game?

Speaker 3 My one tough game in three years.

Speaker 1 It's all right.

Speaker 3 I mean, it happens.

Speaker 3 I'll have a tough game and hopefully my long career in the NFL.

Speaker 3 And it's going to happen. It's how you come back and the confidence and hard work that you put in to come back and recoup and go out there and go win the next game.
I like that.

Speaker 1 I have my marching orders. I'm defending you online.
Now, what about people who get maybe a little too excited?

Speaker 1 Should we just try to take it one game at a time?

Speaker 3 You can take it one game at a time. You can have at it.
You do your thing.

Speaker 3 Whatever floats your boat.

Speaker 3 Just be you.

Speaker 1 Yeah, just be you. Yeah, just be you.
Because, yeah, there was someone said, I saw this one guy say, you know what? I'm done being mature. I tried for an hour and it sucks.
Caleb Williams is a guy.

Speaker 1 I need to get out of my own head. He's going to be so fucking good.
I'm going to be so fucking happy and life is going to be amazing. Suck my dick from the back, haters.

Speaker 1 I might have said that after an hour of your preseason game. All right.

Speaker 1 I won't retweet it. I won't like it or anything.
Oh, you can like it now. That's what's great about you.
You can get Twitter. There's no likes.

Speaker 1 Yeah, hidden likes. How crazy are you going with the likes these days?

Speaker 3 Not crazy.

Speaker 3 No, not crazy.

Speaker 1 I'm so fearful that they're going to change the background. Yeah, I am too.

Speaker 3 I don't really go in the liking stuff.

Speaker 1 I got to flip it on, and we're all just going to be standing there with our clothes off. Like, what the hell do you think? I got some stuff I got to clean up.

Speaker 1 Got to go back into the history here.

Speaker 1 I read that you drink four ginger beers a day.

Speaker 3 I back down from that, diet-wise, and things like that. It's a lot of sugar in them.

Speaker 1 That's a lot of ginger beer. Yeah.

Speaker 3 I'm actually trying to create my own ginger beer with not as much sugar. Oh, because I love it so much and I want to be able to drink it.
It's so good.

Speaker 3 And it's always, and I actually learned this.

Speaker 1 I'm going to start drinking it. Yeah.
I'm going to have to just do everything. It's pretty good.

Speaker 3 Have you tried it?

Speaker 1 No, I've had ginger beer before.

Speaker 3 You got to try.

Speaker 3 You got to try the

Speaker 3 right now.

Speaker 3 I'll get to y'all on what it's going to be.

Speaker 3 But you got to try Fever Tree. That's the best one right now.

Speaker 1 And then when yours comes out, that will be the best one.

Speaker 3 Yeah, we're going to blow that up.

Speaker 1 My grandfather used to drink old-time ginger beer when I was growing up. And so I would have some.
I don't know what that is. I liked it.
It was powerful. It had that

Speaker 1 taste to it.

Speaker 1 And I feel like

Speaker 1 kids don't drink ginger beer anymore. It's so good for you.

Speaker 3 Also, it's good for your stomach and all.

Speaker 3 It has

Speaker 3 a bunch of awesome benefits from it, but it is a little bit of sugar.

Speaker 1 So I back down from it. I back down from it.
We'll bring it back. You're doing work with the foundation that you just started, right? Caleb Cares.
Caleb Cares. What is Caleb Cares?

Speaker 3 Yeah, so Caleb Cares is like

Speaker 3 an anti-bullying

Speaker 3 and mental health

Speaker 3 nonprofit that we try and do our best with anything that we can do.

Speaker 3 And a lot of times it's with boys and girls clubs that we try and help out with and reach out and

Speaker 3 show up in person. We've done it in LA, D.C.,

Speaker 3 now here in Chicago, trying to grow it. I want it to be a huge thing globally and

Speaker 3 be able to use my platform and anything that I can do to help in those ways. And it's just trying to provide

Speaker 3 a good spokesperson, a good person to be able to help and reach out. If people need to reach out to

Speaker 3 Caleb Cares and

Speaker 3 get help or whatever the case may be or just talk to somebody and things like that.

Speaker 3 We're trying our best. That's awesome.

Speaker 1 We'd love to help in any way that you ever need it. Awesome.
Yeah. Remember that show?

Speaker 1 I forget what channel it was on where there would be a bully and then they would invite the bully out to do something. There'd be an MMA fighter that was waiting.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 3 Yeah. Well, we don't do it like that.

Speaker 1 We don't beat up bullies.

Speaker 3 Yeah, we don't beat up bullies. But we, I mean, for people that, you know, grades or they get in trouble or whatever the case may be,

Speaker 3 just trying to shed, you know, some good light on what, you know, things should be and how they should be. And we've had so far pretty.

Speaker 3 Awesome success through that, through the process that we've been through and, you know, showing up, being in person, going to the boys and girls clubs,

Speaker 3 providing gifts and presents for certain things.

Speaker 3 We call it the Caleb Cares Hero Award for people that change their

Speaker 3 attitude, their mindset, all of that. And

Speaker 3 the teachers or the helpers or TAs are showing or they

Speaker 3 tell us about their progress and things like that. And then they get an award and they get some gifts or they get some beats or whatever it's been in the past.

Speaker 1 That's awesome. I mean, we can't beat up you don't beat up bullies you can't beat up bullies but if you ever get to a point where you need us to ratio a bully we could do that online or

Speaker 1 we could drop a quick ratio on somebody we need to make a bully change his profile pick yeah right sounds good yeah we get them that's another yeah that's another win i want to bring up one story that i loved and like says what you are as a teammate and uh you know the media goes with all these different stories like i said i think two years being the number one pick yeah everyone's gonna poke holes yeah but when you won the heisman you brought your entire offensive line and you demanded that they would come.

Speaker 1 Was there any pushback when you're like, I'm not going if I don't bring my guys? Well, there was pushback.

Speaker 3 I said, I want to invite them. And then there was pushback.
And then I said, I'm not going unless...

Speaker 1 That's awesome.

Speaker 3 And then it ended up happening.

Speaker 3 And then we ended up having a great...

Speaker 3 It was like... I'll never forget

Speaker 3 that night

Speaker 3 because we all went and sat around. We ended up getting a suite after you win.
You get a suite after you win, the Heisman.

Speaker 3 And so we ended up going up to the Suite, and we just, I mean, we had chicken fingers, pizza. I mean the the

Speaker 3 big man yeah the big man had beers and and drinks and stuff like that and we were just I mean we were we were having a blast just sitting around a round table and just music laugh and joke and think about you know all the all the good times and having stories and stuff like that and just enjoying enjoying each other I love that because you know there's that I mean that's just that especially in a moment because I was reading the story that like all your offensive linemen being like we don't know when we're going to be all together again and we're just going to enjoy this moment together hanging out, getting room service.

Speaker 1 Like that's old school fun. Yeah.
Like, so I, yeah, I love that story. That's a great teammate.
So I just wanted to highlight that story. Yeah, I appreciate it.

Speaker 1 How do you fly back with the Heisman Trophy? Did you just bring it on? Did you have a picture of the press?

Speaker 3 No, so they, so, so USC provided the private plane

Speaker 1 for that.

Speaker 3 And then, you know, we hopped on the private and

Speaker 3 it was sitting pretty in the private plane.

Speaker 1 I love it. So I know that you've received, I read that you've received a lot of media training.

Speaker 1 So you're ready to deal with the media that tries to get you to say stuff yeah i don't know if they prepared you for this question all right um if there was a button if you had a button and if you pushed it

Speaker 1 one bears fan would die

Speaker 1 but you would win 10 super bowls do you press the button you can kill me

Speaker 1 you don't you don't know you don't know which one's gonna die one just one just 10 super bowls 10 bowls i feel like most bears fans would be like i'll i'll throw i'd press the button for you team-based sacrifice.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Wow. That's love.
It is love. So, do you press the button?

Speaker 1 I think you're going to take it. I'll take it.
I'll take it. I'm saying I'll take it.
I'm reading your button right now. You're pressing the button many times.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you're getting 30 Super Bowls. Yeah.
Smashing it.

Speaker 1 I like that.

Speaker 1 I would press the button.

Speaker 1 Ten Super Bowls.

Speaker 1 That's a lot of Super Bowls. Yeah, that's...
That's great. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 1 All right. Well, I know we got to wrap up, and we appreciate your time.

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Speaker 1 So I'm a big college football fan as well, and I had one very stupid question. Utah, can you tell the difference

Speaker 1 when it goes from day to night there? Because I have a theory that if Utah, like you tell me Utah is playing a game, you just tell me what time they're playing.

Speaker 1 Because if it's nighttime, I'm going to bet on Utah. If it's daytime, take the other team.
And you had that one game where we started. Started in day.

Speaker 3 Started in day, ended in night.

Speaker 1 And you guys were awesome in the farm. There were two of them.
Yeah. And it was just like...
Yeah, two. So can you feel the difference in that crowd? It's only, and there's always a crowd.

Speaker 3 That crowd was actually an awesome crowd. Love the, love the stadium, love all of that, love the crowd.

Speaker 3 But man, I don't even. They're a tough football team.
I mean, I don't know how we didn't win win any of them.

Speaker 1 It was, it got dark. Yeah, I mean, that's literally all it was.
It was

Speaker 3 Pac-12 after

Speaker 1 dark. Yeah, after dark.

Speaker 3 Yeah, it was tough.

Speaker 1 Yeah, is it weird now that you're in Big Ten country and your USC is going to come play? Yeah, it's weird.

Speaker 3 It's going to be cool, though. It's going to be cool.

Speaker 3 Hopefully, I can try and get to

Speaker 3 that first game. If not, they'll be around.
They'll be around here, hopefully.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Well, Caleb, thank you so much.

Speaker 3 No, awesome. Appreciate you.

Speaker 1 I wanted to say I love you, but that would be weird because we just met.

Speaker 3 No, it's all good. All right.
I love you.

Speaker 1 I love you. All right.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. But no, seriously, thanks so much.
And we're excited for this season. Yeah, same here.

Speaker 1 And let us know if we can ever ratio someone for killed. Of course.

Speaker 1 There you go.

Speaker 3 Appreciate it. Appreciate it.
Thanks for having me. Much love.
And

Speaker 1 the Bears. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah.

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Speaker 1 Okay, let's finish up the show. We got guys on chicks.
Hey, boys, longtime AWL here. Congrats to Pug on 98.
That was electric. See how easy that was, Max?

Speaker 1 Anyway. That was electric.
PFT. What?

Speaker 1 See how easy that was? Yeah, I'm beyond impressed with Pug.

Speaker 1 Shout out to one guy who said that he had been picking 98 for an entire year because of Connor Boudard when the Black Cocks got Connor Boudard. And he's like, all it took was Pug to pick it once.

Speaker 1 And we're back. Like,

Speaker 1 the guy's just, he's magic, and Pug is magic. Anyway, any advice on asking a guy out?

Speaker 1 There's this guy in my apartment complex that I'm borderline obsessed with, and I'm curious whether he's interested.

Speaker 1 We've hung out a few times, walking our dogs and getting drinks with mutual friends, but never one-on-one.

Speaker 1 Should I just assume that if he was interested, he would just ask me out and accept that it's never going to happen? No.

Speaker 1 No, that's not how it works. No, we're stupid.
Right now, the guy is probably leaving a voicemail for another podcast asking whether or not he should ask you out. Yeah.
It's on life advice right now.

Speaker 1 Here's the thing.

Speaker 1 Just ask him out.

Speaker 1 I don't know a single guy that's intimidated or has like a turnoff to a woman asking them out.

Speaker 1 If he's interested in you and you ask him out, then it's actually the best thing that could ever happen to him.

Speaker 1 What's going through his brain right now is there's a cute neighbor of mine who I walk dogs with and we've had some beers and I really want to ask her out, but I'm super afraid that if I ask her out and she says no, it's going to be awkward every time I see her.

Speaker 1 That's exactly what's going through his brain every day when he wakes up. So if you just ask him out, you're good.
Yep.

Speaker 1 And then when you guys break up, one of you will have to move because that will be the awkward time. Yeah.

Speaker 1 But

Speaker 1 you'll, you know, have some fun in between.

Speaker 1 Dogs become friends.

Speaker 1 Oh, then you got to explain to me. Don't get a third dog.
No. Because then you'd have to figure out who gets the third dog when you break up.
Yeah. And it will be a messy breakup.

Speaker 1 It also matters if you live on the same floor, I think. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Oh, even messier. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Hey, PMT boys, I went to a college party last weekend of school in May. The last weekend of school in May.
Me and this guy had a lot of fun dancing and hanging out there.

Speaker 1 He bought us an Uber back to his place, but he threw up in the Uber into the trash sack. I wanted to go back to his apartment, but he said he's too fucked up and unable to perform.

Speaker 1 Do you think he was lying to me or is that true? Oh, no, that's definitely true.

Speaker 1 That's definitely also

Speaker 1 credit to this woman. She shared an Uber back with the guy.
He puked in the Uber. Yeah.
And then she was like, you want to go fool around? Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Oh.

Speaker 1 That's a real one right there. Yeah.
I mean, he was just so bombed that. Wow.
And then she's like, do you think he was faking it? Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Imagine if the guy could puke on command just to get out of hookup, bad hookups. Yeah.
I'll take the $500 Uber cleaning charge. Actually, you know what?

Speaker 1 Now that you're saying it, yeah, he was faking it. He faked the whole thing.

Speaker 1 You got to think about something else. Okay.

Speaker 1 Sub Dad Cat, Jinko Man, and Bell Ringer. My husband is not a football guy and loves museums and art fairs with a particular interest in modern art.
He'll watch football with me and scroll his phone.

Speaker 1 Con.

Speaker 1 What's that? I'm getting a call, sorry.

Speaker 1 Doesn't particularly enjoy it, and when we get together with friends to watch a game at a house or bar, it's pretty awkward because he doesn't understand the lingo or rules.

Speaker 1 Is there any hope he will come around? No. Sounds like you just.
You have an art guy. Yeah, this is

Speaker 1 this is like,

Speaker 1 remember when we went to dinner, PFT? We might have told this story, and there was, um, we went to dinner with a friend, and he invited the guy who wrote the music to succession. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And there was a moment during dinner where I actually,

Speaker 1 I felt like an idiot, but I was like, hey, man, can I ask you a question? Like, it's kind of a weird question. He's like, yeah.
I was like, what do you do on Sundays?

Speaker 1 And he was like, what do you mean? And then he explained, like, yeah, I just go to the park or in, like, he lives a regular day. And it just was, it's so foreign to me.

Speaker 1 Like, what do you, imagine having, having your full weekend clear every single weekend. He's productive.
He actually, he, he does things to improve himself. Yeah.

Speaker 1 But even summer, I mean, there's still some sports. But yeah, yeah, I guess it's summer.
Yeah, yeah. But imagine having that all year round.

Speaker 1 It's a very bizarre feeling. Like you'd, you'd have all, you'd get all the stuff done around your house.
You'd go do things.

Speaker 1 Well, listen, listen, admiring art isn't that different from watching football. Yeah.
Hear me out. You spend all day, you pay like $15.

Speaker 1 You go to a big building and then you look at a screen on the wall. And then that screen makes you feel emotions.
Not only that. That's exactly what I do every single Sunday.

Speaker 1 Add to that, a lot of times when you go to the museum, you get the headset and someone's explaining the art to you. Yeah, exactly.
It's a complimentary piece.

Speaker 1 You've got like a play-by-play guy for the art. Right.
And it makes you feel angry sometimes. Other times it makes you feel happy.

Speaker 1 Other times it makes you feel like you want to get into a fight with another guy that's in the art museum. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And then you go to the gift shop, which is similar to when we order like $500 worth of wings and pizza. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Or you buy like, yeah, you're getting like your fifth like on-field replica jersey for your favorite team. Yeah.
That's what you're getting when you get the Rembrandt calendar. Right.

Speaker 1 It's actually the same thing as being a sports fan. Yeah.
Okay, Hank, last one.

Speaker 1 Hey, PMT boys, my boyfriend is a longer-time listener, and I've gradually become a reluctant fan of your show. Whoa, whoa.
There's a lot of qualifiers in that sentence right there. Chill out.

Speaker 1 When my boyfriend gets drunk, he will often eat whatever is available.

Speaker 1 Most recently, he pulled out five tortillas and made a bunch of quesadillas, but he also included mayo and peanut butter along with the cheese.

Speaker 1 I find this disgusting, but wanted to get your thoughts. What has been your trainest drunk food creation? I mean, that's that's not that mayo and peanut butter together is gross.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but I'll stand on that. I would agree, but with cheese.
Putting yourself into a drunk person's mindset where you just take anything that you see and put it together. Like, I've heard worse.

Speaker 1 Yeah. And he probably likes mayo and peanut butter.
Like, he was just like, oh, let's just play the hits. How many times have you, I was very, I never did like the

Speaker 1 a ton of crazy ones. It's just usually just a frozen pizza.
How many frozen pizzas have you guys burned to almost burning your house down? I can think of three times. I was going to say seven.

Speaker 1 I can think of a few. Yeah.
I once

Speaker 1 drunk with a pizza in there and it's just a brick when you wake up. I used to keep my buns and like bread in my stove in my old apartment because I didn't have a lot of space.

Speaker 1 And I accidentally, I thought I took them all out. I left one in there and then I lit an entire?

Speaker 1 Yeah. Oh, no.
That's bad. That's a bad place to keep plastic.
Yeah, that's bad.

Speaker 1 It's so great.

Speaker 1 That's a great Hank story. I wish I had heard that before.
What I used to do is I used to just go into my closet and add chips.

Speaker 1 Like I would always get like the flaming hot chips or the Takis, and I would add those to just anything. If I had like leftover fried rice from a restaurant, guess what makes it better?

Speaker 1 Put some flaming hot Doritos in there. Yeah.

Speaker 2 I would leave the stove on once a week in college.

Speaker 2 It became a thing that my roommates had to be there when I was using the stove because they knew I was going to leave it.

Speaker 1 on every time. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I wasn't even drunk either.

Speaker 2 That was just like I would cook something and then leave the stove on after.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Well, you were just

Speaker 1 I was just dumb. Well, all right.
Hold on. To back you up, it was obviously if it was a college apartment, it was the coils.

Speaker 2 No, it was one of the electric ones, but it wouldn't be red.

Speaker 1 Like, yeah, that's not your fault. That's not your fault.
The coils are like you leave those on.

Speaker 2 You can see the fire. I couldn't see the fire.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah. If it's an open flame one, like if it's a burner, then you're an idiot.
Anything else, I have your back. Yeah.
Yeah. All right.
Good show, boys. Hard knocks.
That was fun. Yeah.
Holy shit.

Speaker 1 Thank you also.

Speaker 1 Any of the AWLs that didn't spoil it after I accidentally said it on Donnie's live stream at like 11 a.m. today.
So, good job.

Speaker 1 It's been cool seeing part of my take make it to the big screen again. Yeah, this podcast might actually work out.
As a TV show? No, as just a podcast.

Speaker 1 All right, let's kick it back to ourselves for lottery balls. Okay, let's wrap up the show.

Speaker 1 We're back in studio for the numbers. Pug, can he do it? Three in a row.
First ever three Pete. Pug, you got to go first.

Speaker 7 I think I'm going to go 97, Pug.

Speaker 1 Wow. You crazy bass.
You are fucking psychic. Maybe work my way down.
Wait, Hank's mic's not on. Hank's Mike's not on.
This is good.

Speaker 1 Yeah, best part of the show.

Speaker 1 You're good. What are you going to say, Hank? I kind of had my first line was...
It was a killer line? Yeah. I just pretend.

Speaker 1 Just pretend. Hey, Pug, you go first.

Speaker 7 I think I'm going to go with 97.

Speaker 1 Oh, you're sick.

Speaker 1 Do you think that just going down in order is going to work?

Speaker 5 I mean, that was a good line, Hank.

Speaker 1 Yeah, the first one was. Wait, was that because that was your strategy at one point?

Speaker 1 But Pug won't miss numbers. True.
He's just going to get them all. Pug's just better.
Yeah. Pug's a better, he's a better human being and dog than all of us.
Yeah. I'll go with 20.
I'll go back to 8.

Speaker 1 Pug might be a better picker of numbers than human.

Speaker 1 I don't know. He's a better dog than picker human.
I mean, he's an elite at picking numbers. He's a very great

Speaker 1 human. We love him, but

Speaker 1 is he elite?

Speaker 1 I think he's probably the best on the show. Yeah, by far.

Speaker 3 Thanks, guys. That means a lot.

Speaker 1 Pug.

Speaker 1 See, what a good guy. All right.

Speaker 1 What's your number? 70s.

Speaker 1 70.

Speaker 1 70s. Yeah, okay.
70s. Did you just try to pick all the the 70s?

Speaker 1 70s. Max, have you ever gotten the lottery ball?

Speaker 2 I've gotten the number 56.

Speaker 1 21.

Speaker 1 You've never gotten the lottery ball. Eight.

Speaker 1 This is 97. I quit.

Speaker 1 Two.

Speaker 1 Two.

Speaker 1 Two is the number.

Speaker 1 Love you guys.

Speaker 1 I don't know what about to say, I'd say it anyway.

Speaker 1 Today's on my day to find you. Shine away.

Speaker 1 I'll be coming for your love of day. Shine away.

Speaker 1 I'll be coming for your love of grace.

Speaker 1 me

Speaker 1 stop me, rest the same.

Speaker 1 I won't say it, spark me somewhere.

Speaker 1 Something learning that life is okay. Say after me.

Speaker 1 They so let it to be safe, that's all it says after me

Speaker 1 I said it to be safe to sell it. Things I can say every little I thought just to play my memories away

Speaker 1 You all things I've come to remember shiny away

Speaker 1 I'll come for you anyway

Speaker 1 I'll come for you anyway

Speaker 1 Take on me.

Speaker 1 Take on me.

Speaker 1 Take on me.

Speaker 1 Take on me.

Speaker 1 Take on me.