Cam Newton & Brandon Marshall In Studio, Week 13 Picks & Preview + Fyre Fest

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On today's part of my take, we have an awesome, awesome in-studio interview with brandon marshall and cam newton uh had a great time with both the guys talked about everything their careers their media ventures cam's run at auburn awesome awesome interview then we're going to talk week 13 picks and preview and the crown jewel of sunday the Niners versus Eagles. We also have Firefest, Fantasy Fuckboys, Great Friday Show, sending you into a great football week.
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Okay, let's go.

It's Pardon Mike T, the number one spot podcast on the charts and in your heart. Yeah, pardon my take Yeah, pardon my take Yeah, pardon my take Yeah, pardon my take Welcome to Pardon My Take.
Today is Friday, December 1st. And is Dak Prescott the NFL MVP? I was about to say congratulations to the Dallas Cowboys for winning the Super Bowl.
The Super Bowl? The Super Bowl. You just won the Super Bowl? I think the Cowboys.
I don't know if I'm going to go that far. This is perfect because Dallas fans are so confident right now, as they should be.
You're a good team, but you're basically the same team that you've been or that you were last year, at least. Mike McCarthy is the same guy that he was last year.
He almost blew that into the game thing. Yes.
He almost did with that pass to the end zone, stopped the clock, gave him a lot more time. That would have been something we would be discussing right now if it didn't work out.
But the Cowboys are good enough. Cd lamb is a fucking beast and they're good enough offensively their defense came up big when it mattered even though there were no punts tonight they didn't force a single punt and they didn't have to punt the cowboys played a good game but i do love it feels i'm getting excited since i can't root for the commanders do anything special this year i am finding myself just rooting more and more more for the expectation for Dallas Cowboys fans to get higher and higher and higher and then end in ultimate heartbreak.
But hold on a second. You just said they're the same team as last year.
Dak Prescott's playing way better than last year. He is better than last year.
He is playing out of his mind. And I know he probably won't win the MVP because the MVP is going to go to the one seed.
They'd have to jump the Eagles. Jalen Hurts is also playing very good football.
I'm just saying, Dak Prescott, I mean, he's playing phenomenal, phenomenal football. Hank, you're a Cowboys fan.
I saw your friend is a Cowboys fan. Yep.
Tiff. Tiff.
Shout out Tiff. Dak is awesome right now.
Like, there's just no way to, like, that's just what he's taking care of the football. Last year he finished the season – I know he was injured for a few games, but he finished the season 23 touchdowns, 15 interceptions.
This season through week 13, he's 23 touchdowns, six interceptions. He's having an awesome, awesome year, and he's up there for MVP if they could figure out a way.
I mean, it all sets up now because if the Niners could somehow beat the Eagles on Sunday, next week becomes a colossal game between the Eagles and Cowboys. We're going to find out how many points the bank is worth.
That's what we're going to find out. But yeah, the Cowboys, like, offense is humming.
They have so many weapons. It feels like they finally like last year, a couple years ago, it felt like they didn't have the complementary weapons.

Now Brandon Cooks, he's back.

I also think a couple years ago they were in this pattern

where they had to run Ezekiel Elliott more than they should have.

Yeah.

Because Jerry was paying him so much money, and Jerry's like,

hey, this is my star running back, let's give him the ball.

And it became pretty clear, at least last year,

that Pollard was a better option for him at running back when he was in the game.

Yeah.

And so they were like forcing the ball to Ezekiel.

Now they don't have to worry about that anymore.

Their wide receivers are dynamic.

They've got a good tight end.

Yeah, Jake Ferguson is awesome.

He was a beast tonight.

The Seahawks' middle of their defense was just getting gashed.

And so I do want to talk about the Seahawks in a second. The one thing that would make me nervous, and maybe you can just say, hey, that was a little off night, weird setup.
Their defense, the Cowboys' defense, which they have been, you know, that has been the thing that they've been resting on for a couple years now, did not look great tonight. And it was against, you know, if you want to look through the Cowboys' season, you could make the fraud case and the fact that they have really kicked the shit out of some bad teams and some bad quarterbacks and when they face good quarterbacks their defense does not look the same oh i'm not was that that that did happen tonight i mean gino had a good night i'm not making the fraud case against the cowboys i think the cowboys are good i think the cowboys are a great team they're they're one of the teams that could win the Super Bowl right now.
I'm just saying I'm putting a lot of my sweat equity and my mental well-being in the fact that I'm just imagining a world where they have a very heartbreaking end of their season. Oh, that will most likely happen.
The Cowboys feel different this year just in the fact that Dak Prescott is playing a lot better. And he has to prove it still.
But he is playing better than he was last year. And it doesn't, it feels like, you know, if he can keep elevating his game, who knows? Max, you're shaking your head.
This is, you blame this loss on me. Yeah, I mean, you changed the whole vibes of the game.
Because I told him he had to come in the gambling cave

because we were watching the game in the gambling cave,

and we would just hear Max.

For people who think that Max is doing a shtick, it's not,

because he was sitting in the editor's bay where guys were working,

and we would hear him from around the corner just screaming,

like, that's a flag, and shit like that.

So I was like, hey, you've got to come sit in the gambling cave,

and then I don't think the Seahawks scored again. Were the Seahawks winning when you did that? Yeah.
Yeah. And I don't think there was a positive play for the Seahawks since I sat in there.
I don't think so either. Damn.
That's so messed up you did that. Well, and then Big Cat tried to give me the whole, he was like, oh, so you think that that really affected the game by you sitting in here rather than sitting out there and then i actually defended you hank and i was like yeah no it didn't you freak out and hank for pulling no i said last week obviously it affected the game i agree with you no that's not yes i do but no but i would i know that it did and then i asked taylor luon who's sitting there was like did you ever when you were playing in the nfl were you ever like man it feels like feels like someone switched their position on the couch right now.
Max go bad. That rep was bad.
Max go bad. Yeah, did someone just put on their lucky underwear? What the fuck just happened? It affected the game.
Yeah, whatever. It absolutely affected the game.
Fuck the Cowboys. The Seahawks are in trouble.
They played well tonight. And that was like, it felt like this was their kind of, like, hey, this is our last stand.
This is our best effort. I don't know that they're in trouble.
This might be a moral loss for the Seahawks. Well, no, they're in trouble.
Moral victory. They're in trouble in the fact that...
A statement loss for them. They have to play their next two games are against the Niners and the Eagles, and they can't keep losing and make the playoffs.
I think what tonight's game... You have to win games to make the playoffs.
What tonight's game proved more than anything is that Thursday night football whoops ass as long as the teams that are playing also played on a Thursday the week beforehand. And if the refs decide to throw a thousand flags to make sure every offensive possession gets all the way to a touchdown.
There were a ton of flags today, but there was some good offensive football that was played. There was.
DK had a hell of a game. Incredible.
When he caught that first pass and took off, and they said that he reached a speed of like 22.6 something miles per hour. Yeah.
Maybe it's no 22.2 miles per hour, which is 0.2 miles per hour faster than Tyreek Hill has been with the ball this year. And for DK to be faster than Tyreek Hill, despite the fact that he outweighs him by what? Do you think 50 pounds? Yeah.
Is insane. It's insane that that's the fastest dude in the NFL.
He was little boying Deron Bland. He was.
Yeah. Deron Bland got in sign language.
In sign language as well. Gang signs? I don't know.
No, I mean. Roger Good Dell will probably be like, that's a gang sign.
I'm going to find it.

We learn sign language.

Yeah, which is pretty cool.

If you're going to learn sign language to talk shit on your opponent, I respect that.

The Seahawks are in trouble, though.

You got to learn it.

They're six and six and they have to play the Eagles and the Niners.

Yeah, not not a great couple games.

Anything could happen, though.

Anything could happen.

They could.

It did feel like this was like, hey, we're going to put everything into this game. We got to win this game uh we can't keep losing these games they're on a three-game losing streak so yeah it feels like it could it could spiral a little more having to go to at 49ers next week yeah i i could see that but also like the seahawks they find a way to win weird games they do if they can drag you into the mud and make you play a really strange game they can beat you yeah i don't know i was not impressed bad teams i was not impressed with that play call at the end uh where they tried to run the screen on fourth down well they just didn't block the one guy you have to block yeah like michael parsons let's see you you have to i don't could actually run a play where it's like hey we going to block anyone else except Micah Parsons, and it might work.
Yeah. I think in theory a screen could work if you're just banking on them sending everybody at you, and then you could get a big chunk of yardage off that screenplay.
The problem with running a screen there is that Micah Parsons is faster than almost every single other edge defender in the NFL. So if you don't even chip him or get in his way,

make him take a half step to the outside,

he's going to get in Gino's face.

Yes.

Yeah.

That was a sad way to end the game.

Anything else before we get to week 13?

Oh, thank you to everyone.

Spotify wrapped.

That's always cool.

I mean, it's always crazy to see how much time people spend with us

because we're fucking idiots.

There were some insane numbers this year.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Everyone.

Appreciate everyone.

Even if you're not listening on Spotify,

If you're listening on apple if you listen on amazon if you listen on uh google if you listen on youtube we love you all it was uh it was very humbling to see all that it always is these this many people spend this much time listening to my thoughts and and really really that many people are like super well-versed in all the weird shit that's going on with this podcast yeah um it is it's it blows my mind to think about it thank you to everybody every year we know spotify wraps is coming and every year i'm like oh my god like this is crazy that's a lot of this i think the maybe the one of the good things about this show uh is that at the end of the day it does kind of still feel like our lives haven't changed that much. It feels like we're just sitting with our friends and talking.
So when we have these moments where it's like, oh, shit, the numbers are that big, it's always like, damn. 100 countries.
Like you could tell me no one's listening to this show. I'd be like, I'll keep doing it.
100 countries? Yeah. 100 countries? What was the craziest country? Did I not send you guys this? No.
Was it an email? Because if it was, I did not read it. Hank's been sending off a lot of emails recently.
You're the email king of this office. Someone stole some golf clubs? No.
Hank sent an email being like, we're about to go through the tapes. That was just a smoke out.
That was a smoke out. It ended up being, in an ironic twist of fate, the control room person who needed to go through the tapes.
Interesting. Had taken them? It was one club.
There was a couple clubs that were missing. One of the clubs he accidentally had in his bag.
Accidentally? That's the perfect crime. The guy that would be in charge of reviewing it.
He's like, hey, wait, I know this guy. It was Pete? What the fuck? It was Pete.
Okay, so I understand that there's a lot of people in 100 countries listening to this. Top episode, Stephen A.
Smith. If you are in Eastern Europe, please tweet at All Business Pete to stop stealing golf clubs.
25% of new fans discovered you in 2023. Okay, love it.
Let me see this country. I'm getting to it.
I'm getting to it. I'm getting to it.
How does it feel to have gone global? Great.

You were streaming 102 countries.

102?

How many countries are there?

Bulgaria was your top country.

Bulgaria?

I'm just kidding.

The United States is your top country.

There are 195 countries.

More than half of the world listens to this.

Canada, Austria, Ireland, Japan, Colombia.

Colombia, what's up?

That was probably Jackie Tables on vacation. Max.
Guess what the... I like this one.
This one actually surprised me. Fuck.
Go back, go back, go back. Come on, come on, come on, come on.
Your listeners taught music genre. Ooh.

Hmm.

Taylor Swift?

Drill.

Drill music.

Taylor Swift isn't a genre?

No.

Rap.

Oh, really?

Yeah.

Okay.

We should be in the culture department. What's up?

What's up?

All right.

Well, yeah, seriously, though.

Thank you to everyone.

We don't take it for granted.

We never do.

It's pretty crazy. Yeah.
I love you guys. One shared episode was life oh love that it's good of that i'm all out of kids so we'll have to we'll have to think of maybe we'll do it again though because we have titus here well there's also other people on this podcast that could have kids true hank hank i could you could you could good all right well uh let's kick it to ourselves picks and preview and then Cam Newton and Brandon Marshall incredible show incredible interview with both those guys uh here's ourselves okay weekend preview brought to you by our friends at Uber Eats get everything delivered with Uber Eats it season.
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Got myself some snacks. I got some chips.
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Okay. Week 13.
Week 13. I don't like the sound of week 13.
I know. I just don't because now we're putting the word teen in there, and that sounds a whole lot like week 18 to the end.
Yeah, we're in our teens now. Okay, so Sunday feels like we have a little bit, not the best slate, but the Eagles 49ers game, which we'll get to, is definitely the crown jewel of this weekend.
I like that. The crown jewel.
The crown jewel. You like that? That's going to be the game that everyone's going to be focused on in the afternoons.
Yeah, the crown jewel of the weekend. We will live stream it.
Max, you got any flights or anything? He's not on. How's the foot, Max? Foot's good.
I will be here. Okay, great.
Yep. Great.
Ready to roll. All right, so let's get into the Sunday slate.
Let's start.

I ordered them in how I thought.

What are you going to say, Hank?

You say anything?

I ordered them in the games that I thought were the most appealing.

And, again, it's not like the most appealing slate to start, but that's okay because that's usually chaos.

Lions at Saints.

Lions at Saints.

Dan Campbell said he's not going to just yell louder.

They're going to have a plan. I think he should have a new plan and also yell louder at his team.
Okay. Best of both worlds.
Yeah, this is going to be a true test to the Lions. I feel like they're at a crossroads because they've had two bad games.
The Bears was a bad game even though they won, and the Packers was a bad game on Thanksgiving. Are they a real team in the NFC? Can they go down and beat the Saints who are very injured? I think it's Michael Thomas is out.
Alave's in the concussion protocol. Sheed Shahid.
Sheed Shahid's got a thigh injury. Cam Jordan is banged up.
Marshawn Lattimore's out. Wait, you say Michael Thomas is out? Michael Thomas is out.
Shut the fuck up. Never believe it.
We also have a little Discord.

Discord? We have Discord?

No, Discord. Acrimonious Discourse? Is it

Discord? There can be Discord. Discourse

is like a conversation.

But Discord is bad? Discord

is an app. We've got some chaos.

It's actually not a website, Hank. It's an application.

Discord. Boomer.

I mean, you could type in discord.com.

Is that not a website? Well, you shouldn't be typing in any websites right now, Mr. Hacked.
Discourse. Written or spoken communication or debate.
Yeah, but what about discord? Yeah, there can be discord. Yes.
Does that mean it's bad, right? Discord. Disagreement between people.
Correct. Yes.
Okay. So the Saints have some discord.
Happy we got that cleared up. Alvin Kamara, after Sunday's game, said the offense for the Saints doesn't have an identity.
And then Dennis Allen said on Monday, I think we have explosive players on offense. I think we prove we can be explosive on offense.
Essentially saying the offense is explosive. They're 19th in scoring.
So they do have explosive players, but that seems to also imply that they don't have an identity if you answer do you have an identity by saying well parts of our team have an identity yeah that means you don't have an identity right it's like we've got good we've got good parts but the whole thing right if you look at it you just don't know what we do you have a car well i have a tire yeah i've got a lot of i've got a i got a seat and a seat belt i've got a lot of gas yeah do you have a car though no you do not have a car they don't well they do have a car actually yeah they do yep that's but um when you look at the saints and this division as a whole the nfc south i have a prediction about this division okay we're gonna see whoever wins the nfc south will not fire their coach going into next season agreed every other team will okay so we already Okay, so we already have the Panthers. We got the Panthers.
They're out. Saints, they're going to fire.
Yeah, no, you're right. The Bucs should fire Todd Bowles if they don't make it.
Top 10 coach on the hunt out there. And then the Falcons probably, I think that they might fire Arthur Spence.
I'm not saying that they should. Well, they're going to win the NFC.
They are going to win. But if they don't, actually, I'm entertain hypotheticals i like that uh thought though because i think you're right but it also makes for i think hopefully better football from every team in that very sad division going down the stretch because every coach we can say the entire nfc south is coaching for their job i would it actually be fun if like if divisions did like league meetings like all the all the the nfc south got together and like hey guys we to be better.
Yeah. This is a joke.
Annie Agar does that. Yeah, that's right.
She does. Yeah.
She does. Okay.
Yeah, I like the Lions this game mostly because the Saints' rush defense has kind of fallen off a cliff. They've been getting gashed 228 yards last week against the Falcons.
I feel like the Lions might, with Jared's mini slump, they might be like, hey, let's just run the ball down their throat and then we'll just do play action and then we'll win the game. I would like to see the Lions win this by double digits.
Yeah, because the Saints, with all the injuries that we've listed and Alvin Kamara saying we don't have an identity, I just don't know. The Lions' defense is bad, but the Saints' offense is worse.
So it's like you should be able to stop them. They don't have a ton of guys that can beat you.
I actually agree 100% that they don't have an identity. Right.
When everyone on the team seems to like the backup quarterback more than the starting quarterback, that is an issue. And that's what it feels like.
So I went back. There was an alternate angle of Ludacris rappelling from the ceiling, landing at the 50-yard line, which, again, Ludacris, it feels weird to say that he's underrated, but I angle of ludicrous repelling from the ceiling yeah with james landing at the 50 yard line which again ludicrous i it feels weird to say that he's underrated but i feel like ludicrous has gotten more underrated in the last like five years i agree but he was yeah he's the best so he's he's repelling down sing and move bitch and then james winston is getting all up in derrick carr's face like sing and move bitch to him i think he was doing to hype up derrick carr but also at the same time when your backup quarterback is telling your starting quarterback move bitch repeatedly yeah the starting quarterback starts to interpret that in a different way jamis has never been a read the room guy no that's not his strength really read anything yeah read a linebacker it's not like get getting the temperature of a room and being like, hey, I shouldn't do this.

Shouldn't eat a W.

Shouldn't stand up on a table, say, fuck him right in the pussy.

That kind of stuff.

Yeah.

Fuck her.

Fuck her right in the pussy.

Yeah.

So, okay.

Maybe, yeah.

Read the room.

Like, he's never even read a stadium before.

Yeah.

He went out dressed in his pads before a game.

Exactly. Which is like, hey, Jamie, you're suspended.

That's why we love him.

Yeah.

That's why we love Jamie.

That's exactly why we love him.

It was a great clip, though.

It was a great clip.

It, to me, surpassed Drew Locke rapping to Yeezy. Yes.
Or it waseezy. It was Jeezy on the sidelines.
Jeezy. Okay, Nerd Nugget.
The Lions have produced at least 325 net yards in all 11 games this season for the first time in team history. No other team has an active streak of more than five games with 325 total net yards.
Hang the banner. Okay.
Good job, Lions. Yards.
Yards. Yard leaders.
Yards. Yard kings.
But we got a lot of yards. Sounds like a great name for a mower.
The yard king. Or like a good giveaway at a minor league park.
Yeah. Be the yard king.
Yeah. You get to sit.
Come down. We're going to do the yard king giveaway.
Like right behind home plate and you wear a crown and there's a throne. Sit in a lawn chair.
A lawn chair that's got jewels and shit on it the yard king i'm the yard king yeah the savannah bananas are definitely gonna steal that from us uh okay broncos at texans good game i say orton game i say great game yeah i say this might be the crown jewel of the morning oh so it's an important game the broncos uh if they win on sunday 64% chance of making the playoffs, which is wild to say given where they were at the end of September. If they lose, they go down to 21%.
And the Texans, similar, 54% if they win, 18% if they lose. It's a loser leaves town game.
The loser of this game will be under 25% chance to make the playoffs. I'd say loser moves to the suburbs.
They can still get back in if they want because I looked at the Broncos' schedule. It's not the easiest thing in the world, but if they lost this game, I could still see them win.
I think they're probably going to lose one more at least. And things can shake out differently, obviously, over the course of the last few weeks.
But, yeah, I don't think that the Broncos are totally out of it. They've won, what, five in a row right now? Five in a row.
Five in a row since October 22nd. They've beaten the Packers, Chiefs, Bills, Vikings, and Browns.
I'm going to put an asterisk on the Browns' win, too, because that wasn't a real football team that we saw last week after DTR got hurt. Yeah, so you brought up those teams, and that was what I'm thinking about this game.
So the Broncos have righted the ship. They've looked a lot better.
They've also been getting a shitload of turnovers, 16 turnovers in the last five games in that stretch. And I was thinking about it.
I was like, huh, I wonder how turnover-prone those teams that they beat. So the Browns, Vikings, Bills, Chiefs are all at the bottom of the league in terms of giving up the football.
They have the most turnovers. And the Browns and Vikings are actually the worst and second to worst.
Okay. So they had a string of games where they played teams that are careless with the football.
They were able to greatly benefit from that. The Texans, on the other hand, are pretty good with the football.
C.J. Stroud obviously started his season without any turnovers for the first whatever it was, six was six seven games that's kind of why i like the texas i feel like the broncos have it's been very nice but when the fumbles and the picks stop is like okay do they have the offense to like get these sustained drives do they can they do it when it's not a you know start the drive at the 50 start the drive at the opponent's 40 let me ask you though, Big Cat.
Let's take it one layer deeper on that analysis. Are those teams ranked as being so careless with the football because they've played the Browns and the Browns took away the football from them? No, no, the Broncos.
The Broncos. The Broncos took away the football.
Well, that's part of them, but they also have a lot of turnovers. Yeah, Mahomes had a bunch of turnovers.
And the Vikings have had a lot of turnovers. The Browns have had a lot of turnovers like in other games.
So, I mean, the Browns, their quarterback situation has led to a lot of turnovers. Right.
So the Broncos defense in addition to the turnovers are also averaging giving up just 16 points a game in the last five weeks. Yeah.
They went from 36 to 16. They're legitimately good.
There's no tank Dell for Houston this weekend. Oh, that sucks.
Yeah. So I kind of like the Broncos.
I know I like CJ Stroud. We are Stroud boys.
But I feel like, I don't know, the Broncos, if the Broncos win this game, I'm going to get reckless with my Broncos takes. And I've been already, like, I've been hitting the median a little bit.
I'm going to go fully off the road with my Bronco. The nice thing about this game is I don't really have, like rooting interest in either.
I like both teams kind of. You know what I mean? Like if either of these teams made it to playoffs, I'd be like that's fun.
Like the Broncos would be a fun story. Russell Wilson you know, putting it all back together.
CJ Stroud's obviously been one of the best stories of this year. So I think I'm okay with either team winning.
There's not one team that I'm like, I don't want to see this team in the playoff i think that what we might have here is a coach of the year bowl maybe the winner of this game shane steichen though still shane steichen is one of my votes you can always say i don't like sean mayden can win for coach of the year you don't think so he he should win comeback coach of the year comeback coach from the beginning of how he started yeah yeah and started. Yeah.
And also coming back. Yes, that too.

So the Texans have never beaten Russell Wilson.

I've got one thing that I'm going to say about each game

where I'm trying to steal Jake's nerd nugget.

I love it.

I've been doing that too, but it's great.

Was that it, Jake?

No, I mean, you guys were close about the turnovers,

but I have a little extra sprinkle on top of it.

All right, go ahead.

Give us a sprinkle.

So the Broncos are now number one in the NFL in takeaways, and their best turnover differential is right now plus eight since 2005. They're plus 20.
See, I'm saying fumble luck, ball luck. If it runs out, you got to try to time it.
We talked about that. Hank, remember the season that Hank did not like that? Hank doesn't believe in luck.
Turnover luck is a real thing you don't believe in weather no the ball bounces like there's times when the ball will bounce it's like oh it went right into someone else's hands or it didn't like there is a there is an element of luck that comes into turnovers tip balls yeah if there's like a cornerback that tries to make an interception and he should and it bounces off his off his hands, and we're like, that's where he plays defense. Most cornerbacks would make that pick.
You know, like there's elements of— There's small, but it's not like a data point. I think it is a data point.
It's the very definition of a data point. Yeah.
I think it's a small sample size. Everyone kind of regresses to the mean where it's like there's certain turnover plays that, okay, that was expected to be a turnover, but like you could have a team that just recovers all their fumbles.
I can understand why Hank doesn't believe in turnover luck because when Mac Jones throws an interception, he throws a fucking interception. That's true.
There's no luck involved. No luck at all.
It's actually turnover skill, and Mac Jones is very good at it. He is.
Okay, next game, Colts of Titans. Jonathan Taylor's out.

That sucks.

Thumb injury.

It feels like a Mike Vrabel game to me.

I know.

Will Levis at home has been good.

It does feel like a Mike Vrabel game.

It feels like a Vrabel special right now.

What uniforms are they wearing?

They're not doing their throwback skin, are they?

The Titans?

No, I don't think so.

Okay.

I'm going to guess that they're going to wear some combination of blue, gray, and like

slightly a color that's in between gray and blue.

I like the Titans uniforms in general.

You do?

Yeah.

No, I disagree.

Yeah.

I kind of like them.

All right.

I'm trying to find.

I don't think there's anything Sunday, Titans uniforms Sunday.

They're like the uniform equivalent of ambient music where you're just trying to study.

It's just kind of like create a player on 2K.

It's just kind of like create a player on 2K. It's like rain, listening to raindrops in your headphones.
Yeah. All right.
Well, I guess I can't find. I was going to just basically base this all off of the uniforms.
But yeah, I like the Titans in this game. I do too.
Sure. I mean, if the Colts can win, they are right now the seventh seed.
Minshew on the road is an issue that is i always remind myself of that minshu on the road yeah all i'm seeing is can the titans please wear the throwbacks again fair fair it's a fair request yeah it's a fair request and listen our our gripe is not with the titans wearing those uniforms because the uniforms are bad and we understand how how teams work when they move. But you can't.
I don't like the idea of going back and wearing a Houston Oilers jersey, especially when you're playing against the Houston Texans. Right, right.
All right, nerd nugget for this game. Titans running back Derrick Henry has great success against the Colts in his 14 games against the division rivals.
He has seven 100-yard rushing performances. Yep.
Mike Vrabel, Derrick Henry game. That's what I'm predicting that.
Okay. All right.
Next game up. Cardinals and Steelers.
Kenny Pickett unlocked. Here we go.
I didn't realize how funny the Matt Canada stats were. The fact that the last game that Matt Canada was not the offensive coordinator for for the steelers was when they lost the browns in the playoffs and the steelers had 523 yards of offense and then they went two and a half years without getting over 400 yards and then the very first game that matt canada was not the oc they went over 400 yards yeah it's insane like how is Was that? I just don't even understand it.
I don't get it either. That's how bad he was.
It's actually, you can statistically look at it, really good offensive output, two and a half years where they couldn't get over 400 yards, he leaves 400 yards. Yeah, it's just funny to me that Mike Tomlin kind of took on the Rooney's mentality with his own coordinator yeah where he was like yeah we like we like continuity here continuity sucks when the person that you're keeping continuity with is garbage yeah that's actually a downside to continuity like yes it but then again maybe tomlin thought to himself like if i start firing people maybe the roonies don't even think that you can fire coaches yeah and so if i start firing them they'll be like wait we can like, wait, we can do this.
Yeah. We didn't know this button was here.
I'm going to press the button. Yeah.
But yeah, it is very funny to see the offense. Look, they looked like a real NFL offense last week.
They threw in the middle of the field. Pat Friermuth season.
Friermuth. I wonder what Deontay Johnson's going to be.
Is this going to be a Deontay Johnson works his ass off this week to try to get rid of the film from last week? Our Steelers insider jersey Jerry said that TJ Watt had a uh players only meeting that he called to to hold people accountable well I heard that there was a fight that was going on actually no that was from Adam Schefter there was a fight that was going on uh Minka Fitzpatrick and somebody else in the locker room were upset and then TJ Watt stepped and he goes hey guys we all need to be a team let's cut this It was an exclusive report from Adam Schefter. I don't know if you saw that.
Then he marched straight into the workout room and started doing squats. And gave him some, what do they do, the taco seasoning? What's the? El Paso.
El Paso. Here, take some El Paso.
You remember that report from Schefter a couple years ago when he was talking about his contract? And he marched straight into Mr. Rooney's office.
Yeah. Said, let's get this done.
And then went right to the weight room. Right to the weight the weight room.
It's the best when Schefter tweets just strictly from the agent. I love TJ Watt in Schefter's brain is like an 80s movie character.
He's Howie Long. We all need to listen to Coach.
Okay, let's get on the same page. Coach is right, guys.
Who's the cheesiest? Is that the commercial that's always stuck in our heads? Yeah. What the cheesiest yeah the Cardinals are bad who do you think JJ's rooting for in this matchup Steelers he's gotta root for the Steelers gotta root for the Steelers is there a chance that he comes back yeah he was talking about it I think on McAfee that he was working out with the guys he did the eyeball emoji maybe before last week's game or the week before game and um i think it was last week's game actually in houston that would rock he like quote tweeted something and did the eyeball emoji and then people were like oh shit is jj watt coming back to the texans i think he was just like the captain the honorary captain got it that would be cool though it would be cool he came back for just the playoffs i would love to see jj watt play for the steelers in the playoffs no i'm saying for the texans i think he's saying he said on mcafee that he was working out with the texans either one for the steelers that would make sense yeah the steelers would be awesome i i like the steelers in this game even though i it's stupid to take mike tomlin as a favorite uh of five and a half points or whatever it is i just don't the cardinals defense is bad they're very bad james connor revenge game yeah they're gonna run the ball down their throat um one note about this one zach ertz got released today as reported by insider jj watt yeah so zach ertz released from the cardinals max congratulations dream team dallas got it out with a broken forearm everyone's saying that he wants to sign with a contender.
Congrats on getting Zach Ertz back. Let me be the first to report exclusively on part of my take that the Philadelphia Eagles have signed Zach Ertz.
Dallas Goddard is going to be coming back soon, so that might not be the case. He said he was trying to play this week, but I don't think he will.
Okay, but you don't want Zach Ertz then. I do want Zach urts julie urts his husband i do want julie urts his husband um but this whole thing that goddard goddard might be out one maybe two more weeks you can bring urts in but i don't think he's going to be like a difference maker you don't think urts is going to be a difference maker trey mcbride is really good that's why that's why this is happening trey mc good.
Yeah. For the Cardinals.
Yeah, no. I mean, Zach Ertz is a Philly legend, but we don't need Zach Ertz right now.
Wow. Not a difference maker.
Turn your back on the family. I'm not turning my back on no family.
It sounds like you kind of are. I'm not turning my back on the family.
I want Frank Reich. I was just telling you that.
Give me Frank Reich. You want Frank Reich over Zach Ertz.
Bad family to bring back. Yeah.
That's not bad family. It's bad family.
Bad head coach. He's got that Panther stink on him.
That's family. You let the text just sit there and you don't respond to it.
Because you're like, I don't want to fucking. Max is just arguing like a six-year-old right now.
That's not true. I'm not arguing.
No. This doesn't need to be an argument.
You just asked me my opinion and I gave you my opinion. It's a bad opinion.
To each their own. To each their own.
Okay. Nerd nugget for Cardinal Steelers.
The Steelers have 124 regular season victories against the NFC since the 1970 merger, which is the most among AFC teams. Wow.
Almost as much as Lamar Jackson. That's wild.
That is wild. Super Bowl rematch, too.
Yes. These two teams don't like each other very much.
Throughout the record. John Madden's last game.
Was it really? Yeah. Oh, I didn't know that.
Yeah, I'm pretty sure that was John Madden's last game. The San Antonio Holmes game? I'm pretty sure that was.
You can fact check me. I'll look.
Pretty sure that was John Madden's last game. Yeah, I've told this story a million times.
One of my buddies decided to drink an entire bottle of Malort and I missed the run back. Oh, no.
Yeah, he's just puking in my house. Were you holding his hair back? No, he disappeared.
He started, he's like, I'm going to try to drink this whole bottle of Malort and then he disappeared and then I found him in my room. He had puked in my room and it was just the worst thing ever.
That's bad. That was great.
It smelled a it was a basement apartment too it was just oh so bad it's a great run back i just i missed the run back larry fitzgerald never gets the credit for it but one of the all-time hustle plays on his part oh is this the year where they did the split madden cover right after the super bowl paul amalo and fitzgerald oh they might have i'm not sure what year that was i think it was madden 10 so it would make sense yeah that does make sense uh okay next up we had wait did you do nerd nugget yeah most wins against the afc yes for afc teams we had considered putting entire bottle of malort in the room with with max and hank oh yeah they're live stream live stream next wednesday we're gonna do it so everyone this is the mount rushmore uh punishment max and hank will be live for 24 hours starting Wednesday night at 9 p.m. Central.
Pardon my take YouTube. Pardon my take YouTube.
We have some things planned for them. They can sleep a little bit overnight if they want to.
We will stay live. So tune in.
It's going to be. We're also looking for someone who could maybe perm.
Not maybe. who could perm PFT's hair.
Yes. And give him a tattoo.
And give him a tattoo. So anyone in the Chicago area who knows someone that would like to come into the office, please reach out to...
That can do perms and tattoos. And tattoos.
Preferably the same person. Preferably both.
Yeah, that would be great. But no, ideally different people for both those tasks.
Loki, I'm going to get kind of a glow up on this one. This is like an extreme makeover.
PFT. It's going to be great, though.
I don't plan on sleeping. It's going to be brought to you by Cell Blue because we're going to have a gold mug that day, too.
So get excited. Get excited.
Oh, yeah. What's the email again, Jake? PMTintern at BarstoolSports.com.
Okay. Dolphins and Commanders.
PFT, I'm sorry. Yeah, I'm very sorry.
This is going to be shit pumping, shit kicking. No two ways about it.
I think that the Dolphins are going to hang a million points on us. So I just don't want to give up as many points as the Broncos.
As long as we don't set any NFL records. But they're going to put up a bunch.
Did you see what the Dolphins do on defense? They don't have a turnover chain. They don't have like a turnover plank or anything.
but they're going to put up a bunch did you see what the Dolphins do on defense they don't have a turnover chain they don't have like a turnover plank or anything but they have a turnover cake what so every player on the Dolphins defense that gets a turnover they get a cake later on in the week oh that's awesome it's awesome yeah so the guy was at Holland that ran back yeah yeah he got a turnover cake this week love it it's a great great like means to uh to motivate your players on defense it's like okay either you can wear a chain around your neck for 30 seconds on the sideline or you get a full dessert yeah during that's awesome also mike dales had has had quite a week he uh did you see the clip he got hit in the nuts on on the sideline. He was hanging on for dear life.

My heart goes out to him for that moment. But he also had to correct Al Michaels' report that he stole his player's girlfriend and made it his wife.

Yeah.

So Al Michaels told the story on Black Friday that they were Mike McDaniels.

They were at some team function.

And then this girl was with one of the players. And he told the like, I'll take it from here.
Otherwise, you're cut. Wasn't exactly like that, but he had to come out and correct Al Michaels for that.
But yeah, that's a very funny story to get wrong. Yeah.
He said that they had just met like 45 seconds before. So it wasn't like he stole someone else's girlfriend.
Gotcha. But still very funny to have to come out and say, hey, I want to just correct one thing.
The mother of my children, my wife of many years. I didn't steal her.
Yeah. Good for Mike McDaniel for having people believe that for a week.
Yeah. It's kind of a baller move.
Yeah. I'm not optimistic, as you can tell about the Commanders this weekend.
It feels like a game that the Dolphins use as just like target practice. Like, let's go out there and let's open up the playbook, try a bunch of weird shit, see if we can get our defense right.
I'm personally hoping for good things from the commander's offense. I would like to see us put up some points.
I'd like to see Sam Howell continue not taking sacks, continue being a good quarterback. And he's thrown for a million yards this year.
I think he has the most yards of any quarterback in the NFL. These are asking him to drop back a lot.
And he's shown a lot of promise. I'm still committed to Sam Howe, but I don't have good thoughts or feelings or vibes at all about the defense.
This could be one of those games that usually when you go in expecting the worst, maybe something good happens. Yeah, it could be.
That's a good way to put it um and i am very dumb with my football analysis so there's a chance i'm wrong about this too i would love to be wrong about this but we don't even really get an interim bump from our defense coordinator jack del rio being fired which kind of sucks because now it's just like okay ron rivera is going to be right defensive coordinator so you don't have like it's not that much of a change of scenery on the defense i would like would have loved to have rivera get fired but rivera kind of did del rio a solid though yeah like hey i'll just do all the work that you're doing you're gonna get paid yeah just get out of here just leave scram you don't have to drive to land over maryland yeah every weekend good for you you don't have to worry about not showering after game because we don't have any water in the locker room yeah it actually was probably like, he probably was like, thanks, man. Yeah, good for you.
You don't have to worry about not showering after a game because we don't have any water in the locker room.

Yeah, it actually was probably like,

he probably was like, thanks, man.

Yeah.

I can go home for Christmas.

So all I want for the rest of the season

is for Sam Howell to continue to be good enough

to make the commanders an attractive head coaching destination.

Yeah, and not get sacked.

That's all I want.

And stay healthy.

Stay healthy and be good enough to the point

where Belichick's like, okay, I can win with this game. I think that's a reasonable goal.
That's all I want. And stay healthy.
Stay healthy and be good enough to the point where Belichick's like,

okay, I can win with this game.

I think that's a reasonable goal.

Yeah.

I like that.

All right, Jake, your nerd nugget.

A win on Sunday would improve Miami's record to 9-3 this season,

something the Dolphins haven't accomplished since 2001.

Head coach Mike McDang would also lock up another winning season.

He'd be the third head coach in Dolphins history

to have a winning record in each of his first two seasons, joining Don Shula andave wanstad wow okay one more one that must be nice all right um i saw a very depressing stat the other day about the commanders and how how historically bad they've been through november over the last 23 years i think their best record was one year when they had i think seven wins going into November. And we missed the playoffs that year.
Every other season has been like three wins, four wins, five wins, three wins, three wins, four wins, three wins. November, this time of year, is just generally not a good time.
It's when teams start playing real football. Yeah.
We bow out. Belichick said that.
He said the season doesn't start until Thanksgiving, right? Well, Chargers are Patriots. Yes.
The season finally starts. Season has begun.
I hope we lose. Okay.
A couple fun fact for you, Hank. So the last time the Patriots were underdogs against an under 500 team at home was the game that Drew Bledsoe got knocked out.
Wow. Started as an underdog, finished as a minus one and a half favorite against the Jets, but that's how long it's been.
They are five and a half point underdogs, I believe, to the Chargers, which the Patriots are really bad. Really bad.
They're really bad. Horrible.
Mack Jones is really bad. I think Zappi's starting.
Zappi is. Zappi is also really bad.
Mack Jones is running scout team this week. Okay.
With all that said, and they're really, really bad. Maybe worse team.
I don't know how you could bet the Chargers minus five and a half on the road. Because the Chargers love to not win games that they should win convincingly.
Yeah, Brandon Staley might be motivated to beat the guy who could potentially take his job, though. I guess, but would you ever? I don't know if I'd take the Chargers minus five and a half against a college team on the road.
Just out of principle. Just the logo, the colors, the history.
You'd be like, oh, they'll probably win by three. But you know how bad the Patriots are right now? I know.
The Patriots are so bad that they got flexed out of Monday Night Football. It was going to be the Patriots.
First ever. First time ever.
Where were you? The Patriots, the Flexigami. It was going to be the Patriots and the Chargers.
Or excuse me, the Patriots and the Chiefs. And ESPN said, you know what? The Patriots are so bad that we don't want Taylor Swift's boyfriend to be playing in this game.
That's how bad we think the ratings are going to be for the Patriots. That's an all-time loss.
They're not wrong, and honestly, I'm happy. Yeah, no, you should be happy.
Fun charger stat, 61 career starts for Justin Herbert, 1,526 points scored, 1,542 points allowed. Pretty damn close.
Yeah. Well, just a couple weeks ago, it was dead even.
It was dead even, yeah. We're updating it.
I want it to stay dead even. They have, what, one more loss than a win with him as a starting quarterback? So by the system, they win this game.
And I think it's like something crazy. Like 20 of the last 29 Chargers games have been decided by a touchdown or less which leads me to my point of like how could you bet the chargers i know that you the patriots are so so bad this is a game you should not bet i'm probably still gonna bet it but you should not bet to hank's point bailey zappy hasn't really started though this could be a coming all right so hank's gonna take or or history repeats itself and last time this happened where there were this much of a home dog, Drew Bledsoe got hurt.
Tom Brady steps in, right? So your starting quarterback, Bailey Zappi, gets hurt. Your backup, Mac Jones, steps in.
And then he becomes the guy. Yes.
This is the start of the DVD. I love it, Hank.
Yeah, this is a bad time to be a fan of either team. But to Hank's point earlier about fumble luck, turnover luck being bullshit, the Chargers kind of back them up on that because they have been exactly as we said, even with point differential, wins, losses, all that stuff, and they have the worst turnover luck of all time.
But it's consistent. Yeah, no, they're just a bad...
With the Chargersgers you can be consistently bad at having turnover luck and it actually just means that you're bad bad that you're bad at football yeah uh okay thank you you don't want to win no okay i think we might though that's what i'm saying it's just that but i don't want to it's like the patriots are so bad it has nothing to do with the Patriots Just the Chargers Five and a half on the road The Lighthouse Stop bringing up the Lighthouse That's crazy It shouldn't be five and a half point favorites They're the Chargers They're a disaster right now They're on quit watch Quentin Johnson got benched last week I think the Patriots are on quit watch, too. Oh, I think the Patriots already quit.

I don't think quit watch.

I think quit watch already ended.

They lost to Tommy DeVito.

Yeah, quit watch happened.

That's true.

Because going into work every day and have Belichick just reading you the riot act,

that's a really good thing if you're a great team,

and he's motivating you to play even better to the best of your ability.

But if you're a really bad team, that just makes you bummed out all the time.

Yeah, yeah.

You saw the Jabril Peppers clip? No. Yeah.
He hugged Saquon Barkley and was like, you're a really bad team that just makes you bummed out all the time yeah yeah you see the jabril peppers clip no yeah he hugs saquon barkley and was like you're lucky we ass oh yeah love it you're lucky we're not better because we would have beaten you if we were better at football we lucky we ass uh okay jake your nerd nugget patriots head coach bill belichick will coach in his 424th overall game this week that'll move past don shula for third most games coached with one team behind George Hallis' 506 and 454 by Tom Landry. Crafts coach Belichick, win or lose, you are third place now.
Most games ever with one team. Unless they fire him before Sunday.
Okay. That'd be funny.
You might take the GMU job, I heard. There was a Photoshop going around.
He loves DC. He does love DC.
That's great. I saw Photoshop.
That's basically close to Annapolis. Very close.
Basically real. And to Landover, where he'll also be coaching the commanders.
Yeah. He's going to be a busy man.
Double dipping. Okay.
Jets. Falcons and Jets.
Tim Boyle's worse than Zach Wilson. Do you think so? I do think so

But he's not Zach Wilson is a thing

I think yeah I know

I don't think he's as

He's not as bad in hilarious ways as Zach Wilson is

He's bad in unique ways

Yeah

He's like traditionally bad at football

Yeah

I don't know

This Jets team is such a bummer

I think their defense is quit watch

Obviously Aaron Rodgers back at practice Okay Is he really going to play for a team that's like, because they lose this week. They're almost mathematically eliminated, but they are eliminated.
Memes, do you want him to play? Why would you want him to play behind this offensive line? I slightly got my hopes up after seeing all those videos. But why? I know why the videos would make you amped up because you're like, oh, that's cool.
Maybe we won't suck ass next year. But do you really want him back this year? Why would you be amped up for that? If they win, he's mastered this offense.
How has he mastered this offense? This is the offense he's always run. Okay's all i got okay that was not convincing yeah um you understand you tried you tried you tried you understand what we're saying like he's mastered maybe like the diagrams of the plays and where to throw the ball but the offensive line is really the point yeah that like he's going to be on a recently repaired very recently repaired achilles and it's not like they have the easiest schedule like they have to win out memes yeah which isn't happening but what if he got hurt again why would you want to risk that yeah i saw a tweet that said his other achilles has the possibility to do the funniest thing ever yeah it's true that is very true it would be very funny i don't know this game i feel like the falcons you have to it's it's the falcons here but then the falcons also like desmond ritter could so easily throw three interceptions in this game yeah the thing is the big question is how many points is the jets offense going to give up right like right the jets offense is one of the worst defenses in the league yeah Yeah.
Yeah. If they don't, if the Falcons score a touchdown.
Or even like a short field field goal. I'm going to say if they score a touchdown, if there's any six involved, if they score a touchdown, the Falcons are going to win.
If the defense doesn't score a touchdown against the Jets offense, I still think the Falcons are going to win. So, Memes, are you in you want to win this game? I'm saying if we win,

I'm all the way back in. Got it.

I guess 5-7 is, I mean,

5-7 does look not that bad.

Because you play the Texans, you play the Browns.

The Browns, both of those teams

are in playoffs, right? I'm just

saying, like, you have a chance.

But Aaron Rodgers

on, like, a recently repaired Achilles

behind that offensive line

against Miles Garrett in the Browns defense, what?

Shotgun.

Yeah, actually, I didn't think of shotgun.

Fuck, I didn't think of shotgun.

Shotgun, get rid of the ball in two seconds, and it's off.

I didn't think of shotgun.

Aaron Rodgers running shotgun only is better than Tim Boyle.

I actually agree with that.

Aaron Rodgers with one foot in the shotgun formation is better than Tim Boyle. Yes.
He can just play and line up like a punter so that no one can touch him. Have him throw from that far off? Yeah.
Double shotgun? Just make the field longer, but it's Aaron Rodgers. Have him be in 50 cal formation? Sure.
Memes, when he tore his Achilles, was he in shotgun? Yeah. Oh, fuck.
He was? Yeah, he was. Dwayne Brown was playing, though.
Wait but he won't be it but so your day one offensive start you're that's better your offensive line's got better has it gotten better it's got worse okay i'm trying to has the field gotten better has the metlife turf been improved we're trying to find a place where we can maybe agree with something you're saying and i'm we're digging deep we just need them to lose to agree okay all right all right so they're all right so then yeah so like lose and then it's over yeah losing but winning it's rogers win and it's rogers this could be this might be the worst win in new york jets if they win win this game, and then Rodgers gets in. I love this analysis.
But I feel like we've had this exact same conversation. Oh, it'll be next week.
We'll do the same thing. About Aaron Rodgers.
It'll be four and eight. And then memes goes and he watches his Jets score three points on offense.
Yeah. He's like, well, maybe next week.
Yeah. Maybe next week.
They win next week. Rodgers time.
Young Wei Ku, the kicker for the Falcons, is now the all-time most accurate kicker in the history of the NFL because Justin Tucker's washed now. Yeah.
So shout out Youngway Koo. Jake, did I get it? No.
I know you're trying. All right, what is it? Falcons running back B.
John Robinson needs 62 scrimmage yards on Sunday to secure the title for having the most yards in his first 12 games of any Falcons rookie in franchise history? I think it might be Bijan season.

I do too.

I think Arthur Smith might be, he finally might listen to all the fancy football nerds

out there and say, okay, you want Bijan?

We're going to build the entire planet of Bijan.

Go straight ahead.

Yes.

That word scrimmage, that's a weird word.

Why do we call it the line of scrimmage?

That's a good question.

I've never thought about that. I've been watching football all my life.
Are you high right now? No, I wish I was high. A confused struggle or fight.
I guess that makes sense. Oh, I didn't know that that was a...
A scrimmage is a confused struggle or fight. That's the first definition.
Oh, didn't know it. Because we always talk about scrimmage being like a practice game.
Yeah, but that is where... To explain what happens in American football on the line of scrimmage, it is a confused struggle or fight.
It is. Like, if you watch it, you'd be confused what's going on.
Yes. And they're struggling and fighting.
Hank has been in a scrimmage against words and reading his entire life. Facts.
Yeah. Okay, before we do the late games, Chevy.
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Okay. Panthers at Bucks.
Frank Wright gone. Frank Wright gone.
Chris Tabor. Did you do some research on Chris Tabor? He coached one game for the Bears when Matt Nagy had COVID.
He's a fiery guy. So the fun fact that I found about Chris Tabor is that he coached one game for the Bears.
Yeah. That's it.
That's all we know about him. I'm of the mindset.
We lost that game. That any interim coach is better than Frank Reich right now.
Like just something different is good for the Panthers?

He is a fiery guy.

I kind of like a special teams coach being named interim head coach because he usually has like a pulse on like the dogs of the locker room,

you know, the grinders.

So I'm good with that.

Also, Thomas Brown, who we talked about earlier in the season,

because remember Frank Reich gave him offensive play calling duties. They won a game.
Then he took it away three weeks later. He's back calling plays.
It seems like the players want him to call plays, so that might be good. And Baker Mayfield's a little banged up.
I'm talking myself into the Panthers. I don't know if you should do that.
I know. I don't know if you should do that at all but but the interim head coach bump is a real thing and and the panthers we talked about earlier with the raiders and their interim situation the panthers are actually the perfect candidate to do our theory of just putting a different interim coach in every single week just somebody that has like a a tenuous connection at best to the charlotte area bringing them in and being like okay's your week.
Because I think in this circumstance, like players will respond to just a change. Yeah.
No matter what the change is. Anything different.
Anything different. Anything different.
I was also thinking about David Tepper more this week. He is a classic example of a billionaire who is used to just having things done.
Almost like the wave of a magic wand wand if you're a billionaire your life is so easy that you just say you want something and then it happens you having a billion dollars is a magic wand yes for anything like oh i want a new plane okay here's a new plane i have and it's not even you have to do it you just have to tell someone plain yeah just be like hey spend my money on this so that i can yeah and then it just happens everything happens for you once you get to a competitive sports league you no longer have the magic wand correct you can't just be like wild card plain yeah i want boat playoff appearance it's not like that anymore clean house and and tepper is very very confused with not having his magic wand ability work right now yeah no i agree with you it's it's very fun to watch because he doesn't seem like the best guy nope not a guy i want to work for you know he he bought when he was at goldman sachs he didn't get a promotion and uh eventually he goes off starts his own hedge fund his former boss didn't promote him yeah he was so pissed off at his former boss he bought his former boss's house yes i remember this in tour town right destroyed yes raised it to the ground and then built a bigger house where his former boss's house used to be i'm a david temper fan now yeah i mean i don't i would not i would not want him running my football team no however i appreciate it when like a billionaire does cartoon billionaire shit he definitely has had that conversation in a meeting where it's like,

what if we just tear down another team's stadium?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Would we win the game?

Yeah.

What if we bribe?

I'll bribe them.

He's probably tried to bribe his opponents.

If we blow up someone's stadium, would they forfeit?

Would we win?

Have I found a way to a perfect season?

Yeah.

It blows up every stadium.

It's like Bane. I got to have hard knocks David Tepper.
Oh, yeah. That'd be sick, wouldn't it? It's going to be the Bears, though, because it's going to be Harbaugh.
What do you mean? Like, Harbaugh's going to come to the Bears. They're going to – Do you do Hard Knocks? Oh, Hard Knocks, yeah.
I mean, like, just following David Tepper. Oh, I would want to, yeah.
His entire life. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I want to see – Oh, you're saying that, yeah. I was saying, like, who's going to be – Hard Knocks next year, if David Tepper was featured, His entire life.
Yeah. Yeah.
I want to see. Oh, you're saying that.
Yeah. I was saying like who's going to be hard knocks next year.
If David was featured would be great. Yeah.
Yeah. But wait, if you have a new head coach.
Oh, yeah. That's right.
That's right. So David temper.
Oh, no. They're going to have a new head coach too.
Shit. Who do we want? We need to start thinking about that for next year.
Run it back with the Jets. Could be the Patriot.
New head coach. Yeah.
New head coach. Yeah.
Okay. Well.
Yeah, okay. We'll start making our predictions.
Okay, nerd nugget for this game. I am going to take the Panthers, and I'm going to regret it.
I just want that on the record. A duo of Bucs defensive players lead the league in rookie tackle for lost leaders.
Kalijah Kansi tied for first among rookies with eight, while Yaya Diaby is right behind with seven TFL this season. Yaya.
So the future of the Bucs defense is bright. Nice.
I guess so. Yeah.
Sure. Yeah.
One anonymous Bucs fan, I won't say their name, but they work at this office and they're annoying as fuck, gave me a tip to bet on Elijah Canty to win defensive player of the year. He's like, at the very worst, you'll have a lucrative cash-out option later on.
So that was a fucking lie. Yeah.
And that's my nerd nugget. He's the top rookie tackle for loss leader.
We could get the spin zone going. He is the top rookie tackle for loss leader.
He's got eight of them. Eight? That's what I just said.
That's a lot. Yeah.
Yeah. Wow.
And Yaya Diaby right behind him. Stop shaking your head, Max.
Don't shake your Stop shaking your head Okay I'm going to say something nice about Jalen Carter Yeah That play they had where he chased down Josh Allen last week That was Jordan Davis Oh that's Jordan Davis and that wasn't Jalen Carter Which is more impressive because he's like 50 pounds I'll say something nice about Jalen Carter It's still unclear whether he was Reprimanded by a police officer or not. Okay, that's nice.
How is that nice? Actually, that's still unclear. That's just like stating a fact.
That it's still unclear? Yeah. Right, so he might not have done it.
That's nice. But you're not even saying that he didn't do it.
Oh, he didn't do it. There you go.
Oh, wait, when he was at Center City and they were going through a self-checkout line. Target.
Oh, you know a lot about this case, huh? Yeah. What's going on there, Max? A lady that he was with stole something? Nothing.
Did they ever find the bike that hit Kelly Oubre? That is weird. I still don't know anything about that.
Or the car? Yeah. That would actually be funny if it was a bike.
Yeah. He was holding a bike but there wasn't talk to the bike.
And But there wasn't talks This was the part of my take segment Where we just read Jeff Nadu's Jalen Carter defensive rookie Did they ever find the guy in Mexico That killed all those people in the cartel Listen I like Jalen Carter But how many tackles for loss does he have Kalajah Canty was just named NFL defensive rookie of the month for November four hours ago and November's over that's incredible he did it so Jalen Carter you didn't get back to me how many tackles for loss does he have more or less than eight how many defensive rookie of the month does he have won let don't memorize his stats. More or less than eight.
How many defensive rookie of the month has he won?

Let's see.

Okay, go check that.

Zero?

Kalaja Kants, he's built

different. He is.
He really is. One of one.

Was it with a C or

K? Kalaja, I believe.

No, C.

His last name is K.

I thought you were asking about his last name. You had a 50-50 shot? I thought you were asking about his last name.
It's a K. I don't know if he has any.
Let's see what the lucrative cash option is like right now. I think it's like $3.
All right. He doesn't have any.
I don't think he has any. So, Kalijah Kansi.
Is it zero? Kalijah Kansi with a K. Your boy has zero tackles for loss, and you think.

No, I was talking about rookie of the month.

Rookie of the month.

He has four sacks.

Collision Cancy.

No, a sack.

Well, it's at least four then.

That's a tackle for loss.

Yeah.

So he's got no rookie of the months, and Collision Cancy with a K has.

At least one.

One.

Yeah, that's correct.

Okay.

Six for Jalen Carter. Okay.
Not eight. It's not eight.
It's not eight. I'm looking at my cash out.
Oh, cash out unavailable. Oh, that's because they know it's about to pop.
About to pop. All right.
Browns at Rams. Joe Flacco? Joe Flacco, baby.
Is it? Is it Joe Flacco? I don't know. It is.
It is. From what I'm hearing, it is.
Hell yes. DTR is still in the protocol.
Usually you don't recover. You don't get out of the protocol in a week.
It's happened like one time. So he's still dealing with that.
And I don't think that they have any designs on going back to PJ Walker. No, I think this is very funny that the Browns fans have to root for Joe Flacco.
It is very funny. Per the offense coordinator of the Browns, Alex Van Pelt, he said Flacco still has an elite arm.
So listen, I've staked my entire reputation on Joe Flacco possibly being elite. This is going to be a great test too.
Joe Flacco's well, well past being old. He's very old.
And when we last saw him he looked terrible but like could a terror once good quarterback who's now old be better than a 22 year old that doesn't know how to play football it's a possibility yeah we're gonna find out here's the thing with Flacco is when we last saw Joe he looked like he couldn't move at all yeah I don't know if he's gotten better at moving around I think basically Joe Flacco was like I've got seven kids or six kids it kind of sucks being in the house all the time yeah it would be nice to just get out of there for Sundays at least yeah so uh I think that was his big motivation on getting back to the NFL but the arm looks good elite in fact yeah I'm I'm I'm in on the Rams though this week the browns defense is very good but they also have had a few games where they've really feasted on some unfortunate situations kenny pickett matt canada clayton tune remember clay yeah i remember him that was wild uh so there's three four games that they've held their opponents to 10 points or less joe Burrow week one when you still hurt. Ryan Tannehill, bad.

Clayton Toon, bad.

Matt Canada, Kenny Pickett.

Browns' defense is still very, very good.

I'm just saying more.

The point is Matt Stafford is better than the four I just listed.

He's much better.

Hurt Joe Burrow, Clayton Toon, Ryan Tannehill, Matt Canada, Kenny Pickett.

I just hope that Joe Flacco and Aaron Donald don't get to meet each other at all.

Yeah.

Because that would be bad.

Yeah.

I can tell you who's going to win that. I want the Browns to hold on and get to the playoffs so bad.
I just don't know. You never know, though.
Flacco, he's still got that arm. Flacco could.
I do think Flacco will have at least a game that surprises us. Yeah.
You remember that comeback that he had? Yeah. On the Jets? It was against the Browns.
Jets-Browns, right? Dude, Flacco still might have it. They played at Rams, Jaguars at home, Bears at home, at Texans.
That's okay. All right, come on.
Come on, Browns. Hold on.
Just hold on. Real bad with Flacco was when he was on the Jets, he was struggling to backpedal and turn around and hand the ball off.

That movement was tough for him.

Yeah.

He's got to stay loose.

He's got fresh legs, though.

He's got fresh legs.

Okay, Nerd Nugget.

Before the Nerd Nugget, I think it's worth telling you guys that the Browns stayed out

west.

Yeah, they did.

Yep.

Good point.

From Denver, and they practiced at UCLA this week, and it was supposed to be a homecoming

for DTR, but he might not play. play yeah yeah so Miles Garrett banged up he is playing though he's playing but I don't know how yeah I don't know if he's 100% if Joe Flacco is going to play for the Browns this weekend keep in mind he is 2-0 against the Rams they were the St.
Louis Rams for both games in 2011 and 2015 in the pair pair of wins. That's terrible.
The average. Terrible nerd.
344 passing yards per game. Yep.
Yeah, he's a Rams killer. Yes.
Two games, average 344. They call him Silverado because he destroys the Rams.
He's way better than the Rams. 2011-15.
I mean, I like it because it's funny because it means nothing. You think it means something.
So it's like, it's a stat that I like because, ironically. If he goes off this week, you were warned.
Yeah, then I'll say, if he goes off this week and the Browns win this game, on Sunday night, I'll say, Jake, you were right. He is the Rams killer.
I'm just reporting facts. What is going off for Joe Flacco this weekend? We should define that because it needs to be on a scale of-

200 yards.

Yeah, over 200 yards.

Multiple passing touchdowns.

Two passing touchdowns.

Two passing touchdowns, one interception, and one 40-yard pass that's 10 yards underthrown

for a pass interference.

Yeah.

I'd at least see two of those.

I mean, I would love to see the entire offense built out of them.

Okay.

Game.

The crown jewel of Sunday.

Niners and Eagles. Niners and Eagles.
Do you feel disrespected, Max? Because I feel disrespected for you. No, I mean, yes, it's disrespectful, but I'm happy to see that line.
Yes, Stefanski is so excited. The boys are going to be fired up.
I think this is going to be the first game in a while that right out of the gate we're humming. I think they could be humming too.

The Niners

have talked a lot of shit.

They have to back it up.

Debo just keeps talking shit. He just keeps

going on different shows and continuing to talk shit.

I don't...

The Eagles didn't do anything

wrong. The fact that...

No, I don't think they're talking shit. No, they are.
I'm not saying they did anything wrong. Are you saying that the Niners are bullies? No.
Did Debo say the Eagles have done wrong things? I'm not saying that. What did Debo say? What do you expect the Eagles to do is all I'm saying.
No, but what did Debo say? He just keeps talking shit. What is he saying? Well, he keeps talking shit on James Bradbury.

He says that James Bradbury is trash,

and then people keep asking me about it,

and he's like, I said what I said, and I'll say it again.

Do you think James Bradbury is trash?

He's not having a great year, but last year he wasn't trash.

So you're talking shit. I didn't say he's trash.

I said he's not having a great year.

Who was the guy who had the penalty at the end of the game in the Super Bowl?

That was a fake-ass penalty.

Who was it, though? That was a fake-ass penalty. Who was it? It was James Bradbury.
Oh, shit. But he had a good year last year.
But if you're a Stefanski, this is the best news you could hope for, is to be underdogs at home. Wait, Sirianni.
Sirianni. I always mix those two up.
Sirianni is absolutely jacked up. He gets to put on Rocky in the locker room.
Here's what it's like to be an underdog in this city he gets to lean into it big time um i i just max is gonna like what i say he's gonna jump down my throat if i say anything no say i the the eagles have the defense especially they played 92 snaps on sunday okay that's a lot of snaps i had a big win against the chiefs on mond. I just feel like this is I feel like the Niners have this game circled more than the Eagles can and I think that like this will be the NFC Championship game and the Eagles will probably beat them in the NFC Championship game but I feel like this Sunday it's Niners.
Sure. Is that fair? I mean I disagree.
Okay. I also think that the Eagles are probably.
If you say the Eagles might lose, I didn't say it. You asked me if that's fair.
And I said, I disagree. Okay.
I also think that the Eagles are probably... Max didn't peak.
If you say the Eagles might lose, fuck you. I didn't say it.
You asked me if that's fair, and I said I disagree. Okay.
Max, are you pissed off at the 49ers that they've been doing a lot of... Every media opportunity they get, they talk about how they would have beaten the Eagles in that game if they had a quarterback.
I get it, but we still kicked their ass. I get that they didn't have a quarterback.
We still put up points. Like they still couldn't stop the offense.
So like where. What's that? Like where's the explanation there? Yeah.
Well their explanation is we didn't have a functional quarterback. But how does that affect the defense? It doesn't.
They're just saying like the entire game thrown off and field position and all that shit. But that just means that I'm agreeing with you on this.
I'm saying if I was an Eagles fan I would be upset by that. You're in your red zone.
Maybe it's the green zone where you become the Hulk. Whatever we say you're just going to to be like, ah.
I think if we were on the road, we would lose this game. But being at home helps.
It's also supposed to be another rainy game, like shitty rainy game. I mean, that helps both teams.
I don't think that helps. The Niners can run the ball.
Yeah, I know. Obviously.
But I'm not saying that helps or hurts anything. That's just an observation.
Have you heard the Kelsey Christmas album? No, I did hear the song. I mean, I did hear the song between the brothers.
Yeah, RIP Shane McGowan. They did the Pogues Fairytale of New York, but they did about Philly.
Yeah. It was pretty good.
It was actually pretty good. It was also interesting, Travis Kelsey singing about Philly.
Yeah. You know what I mean? Interesting.
Well, his girlfriend's from there. Kind of.
Kind of. Jason Kelsey has a beautiful voice.
He's a beautiful man. Surprisingly good voice.
False starts, though. False starts were bad.
False starts were really bad. I think he had to shit.
I think he had to shit. We've all been there.
Jordan Mailata has a great voice, too. Jordan Mailata actually has an incredible voice.
It's not fair. Jason Kelsey has a nice man's voice.
Yeah. That's like the neighborhood bar guy who can get up on the karaoke and be like, oh, yeah, that guy's got a good voice.
Jordan Mailata has real, real voice. He sang a Mariah Carey song, didn't he? Yeah.
Unreal. He's got talent.
My man's got pipes. PFT, are you going to bet the Eagles in this game? I'm game? Actually, no.
I'm going to be unretired by Sunday.

Okay.

No, I'm going to bet the...

Oh, you dick. I thought you were going to be on my side.

You didn't even let me finish.

You didn't let him finish.

I'm going to bet props.

Oh, there you go.

That means nothing to me.

Okay.

A lot of stuff doesn't make sense.

Yeah, that's also true. Nerd nugget time.
Got tagged in this one a lot. This is game two in the 49ers.
Bird gauntlet of a schedule. Last week, Seahawks.
This week, Eagles. This is one you should have gotten, PFT.
Then Cardinals. Then Ravens.
PFT washed. I am washed.
You're the bird gauntlet. I'm the bird gauntlet.

But, Jake, I think you're misusing the term bird gauntlet

because the true bird gauntlet is playing against every single bird team in the NFL.

You didn't mention the Falcons.

Yeah.

Well, it's still a gauntlet.

It is.

It's not the complete bird gauntlet.

No, it's not a gauntlet.

The bird gauntlet is playing against all of the bird teams,

and no NFL team has ever beaten the bird gauntlet.

It's never happened.

Never happened.

I don't think it probably hasn't been scheduled.

Yes, it is. Bird gauntlet is playing against all of the bird teams, and no NFL team has ever beaten the bird gauntlet.

It's never happened.

Never happened.

I don't think it probably hasn't been scheduled.

Yes, it has.

Wrong.

Wrong.

Nerd nugget. Correct.

Nerd nugget of the week.

No team has ever beaten every bird team in a single season

in the history of the NFL,

and it has been scheduled multiple times.

Well, check your little spreadsheet. The Seahawks are twice here, so it could be six games.
Yeah, it could be. Never happened.
Okay. Check your bird fact.
That's a bird brain on your part, Jake. Yeah.
Okay. Last game.
Sunday Night Football. Chiefs-Packers.
I think the Packers might be pretty good. No, the Packers are good.
The Packers are fine. That's what I'll say about them.
They're fine. Yeah, I don't know.
I mean, I'm excited to watch this game. I just hope Mahomes plays well.
I think he will. Beats him.
I think he will. I think the offense, they might have something going with Rasheed Rice.
Yeah. We did lose because the flex, Hank's team was the first team to ever get flexed out of Monday Night Football.
Yeah. They should actually have to announce it that way, too.
Like, we're flexing out because of this team. Yeah.
Because it wasn't the Chiefs. So, we do lose the moment that we talked about, the Michelle Beisner-Buck moment where she's talking to Patrick Mahomes being like, these guys are really coming along.
So let's find it somewhere else. It'll happen.
Yeah. I'm very confident in that.
Did you see what Tyreek Hill said about leaving the Chiefs? Yeah, he didn't get invited over, right? He felt like he was their side piece, and he's never been a side piece before. And Patrick Mahomes has Travis Kelsey over to his house all the time and never had tyreek hill over damn which sucks brutal like i wonder what might have been they just well they probably they probably played a lot of like call of duty with each other right they were yeah they were in land party it also matters like how much like was patrick mahomes inviting travis kelsey over every week because then that is kind of fucked up and that is you I mean? Like, if it was like, oh, Travis Kelsey got invited over once that Tyree Kill didn't.
Yeah. Whatever.
Grow up, dude. But like, yeah, if they had like a standing date.
Yeah. And he wasn't invited.
That's messed up. I think all of you guys have been to my house, right? Yeah.
Not Max. Yeah, not Max.
Don't let him in. Well, that's because I have a dog.
Yeah, don't let him in. So he didn't want to come over.
Don't let him in. Fact or fiction, Max, I asked you to dog sit.
You said no. It was over Labor Day weekend.
All right. Nerd Nugget for the last game.
Do-do-do-do. Okay.
Nerd Nugget of the week. That was a worse one than the first time you did it.
You guys liked it. Part of my soul dies every time.
This one also went viral this weekend. Or this week.
Aaron Rodgers in his first 11 games as a starter. 2,599 passing yards and 21 total touchdowns.
Jordan Love in his first 11 games as a starter. 2,599 passing yards and 21 total touchdowns.
It felt personal to Big Cat that you made that the Nerd Nugget of the Week. Yeah.
That doesn't say they won games. It just felt personal.
It did. I took it personally.
That could have been just any other Nerd Nugget. I took it very personally.
You did the trumpets and everything. Well, I was extra proud this time because you were mocking it.
Because it was personal. Well, it deserves to be mocked.
Get your bird facts. We need to keep the world in order.
That was my bird nugget of the week. Bird nugget.

Have it.

Oh, you should come up with bird nugget.

Yeah, now I'm doing bird nugget of the week.

For every bird team.

Because, listen, I've been on the bird beat for a long time.

That's what I'm saying.

That was yours.

Well, it wasn't even a good one because it didn't involve...

He misused bird gauntlet.

I didn't make the name up.

Yeah, the bird gauntlet is a different thing.

The bird gauntlet is all...

Blame the internet for making it up. That's the crown jewel.
I'm not creating any of this information. Get a crown jewel counter up here.
It's crown jewel. Okay, Jake, for the record, I like the nerd nuggets.
Thank you. I like the nerd nuggets.
I didn't like that one. I didn't like that one.
Fine. And I didn't like the sound.
Well, I had an extra one for this game just in case you stole this one. All right, do it.
Announcer Jinx, kicker Harrison Bucker is a perfect 20 for 20 on field goals and 28 of 28 on extra points this season. Another kicking performance this week.
He'll be the first Chiefs kicker to ever be perfect through his first 12 games of a season and the seventh kicker in NFL history to do it. Okay, so he'll miss.
Pretty impressive. Yeah.
Bet him to miss.

Or not.

You know what?

I might flip it and reverse it.

Get back in on the doinks.

It hasn't been done since 2016.

Justin Tucker.

I might bet a doink. 12 games without a miss.

I might bet a doink.

Can you do that for a regular season?

I think for a standalone primetime game.

Yeah, we'll find it.

You might be able to.

Find it.

Might snow.

Might snow.

Doink in the snow.

Doink in the snow would look great. Get a little flurry of snow falling off the top of the goalpost.
Yeah. That'd be nice.
Okay, so let's do our picks. Give us the standings.
We killed it last week. Yes, we went 14-4 as a group.
Look at that. We know ball.
We know ball. It also was one of those weeks where all the favorites covered.
Yes. All the squares won.
And I hate when I find that out on Monday where where it's like i had a great week they're like vegas got killed and then whatever happens the next week is going to be yeah the complete opposite bloodbath so for the 15 minute opening act in las vegas between the booth i have 14 and a half points max is 14 memes is 13 oh oh tight race very tight and the main event, one hour in Las Vegas. Big Cat, 15 and a half.
PFT, 15. Hank, 11 and a half.
Hank did win the head-to-head against Big Cat for the Packers. That was huge.
That's a two-game swing. Good job, Hank.
So we have 12 picks left, and Hank is down by three and a half points. Far from over.
Yeah, far from over. I had the over in the Monday night game, right? Yes.
That was an all-time bad. That was bad.
That was bad. Okay, who's going first? I believe it's Big Cat.
Oh, okay. Also, we have a pancake update.
It's been a while. Yeah.
Pancakes. Hank continues to dominate with 40.
Max is 31. I have 29.
PFT, 24. Big Cotton Memes, 23.
Okay. Yay.
What a comeback from your boy. All right.
I'm going first. I'll take the Falcons minus two.
They can't lose the Jets. Against the Jets.
That's a good pick. So bad.
That's a good pick.

Am I second or last?

You're last.

I think I'm second, right?

Yeah.

Okay, I'm going to go with Road Dogs, the Denver Broncos,

plus three and a half at the Houston Texans.

I'm going to go with the Lions, minus four and a half against the Saints.

They've been waiting on this since Thanksgiving.

They're going to crush them.

Oh, crush them.

I am going to take the commies.

Too many points at home.

Wow.

Nine and a half.

Oh, he doesn't believe in his team.

It's a shame.

What?

He doesn't believe in his team.

You don't believe in the birds.

Plus three.

He was sitting right there.

I never take the Eagles.

Oh, okay.

I think Max is feeling added pressure this week about this game because he's going to have to watch it. Yeah.
And his foot stinks. My foot is pretty much better.
Pretty much better. Pretty much better foot.
Okay, memes. I'm going to go with Chargers minus five and a half.
Okay. Hank, double dip.
Yeah, I'm going to go Chiefs minus six. Okay.
And Browns, Rams under 40 and a half. Ooh, I like it.
Spicy. New quarterback.
Joe Flacco, he's not new. He's old.
He's new for them. Yeah.
New system. Not going to score.
New system. Browns defense is good.
Yeah. Joe Flacco is a system.
Okay, memes. Game goes through Joe.
Whipping at a background. I'll go Colts, Titans over 42 and a half.
Okay. All right.
Maxie. I like taking the Colts over, so it's been good.
I will go Cardinals, Steelers over 41 and a half. Fuck, that's what I wanted.
Over? Yeah. 41 and a half.
That's what I wanted. Over? Yeah.

41 and a half.

I will go Chargers Patriots under 40 and a half.

I mean, not a bad bet, but.

You think it's going to go over?

No, no, I'm saying it's not a bad game.

I don't want to watch.

Just the game.

Yeah. 40 and a half.

All right.

50.

I'm going to take the Dolphins commies over. 49 and a half.
I like it. 49 and a half.
All right. I guess I'll just do it because I'm going to watch the game.
It's system play. Game's going to be on TV.
I'm going to watch it. Niners, Eagles over 47 and a half.
System play. Although it's going to rain.
Yeah, that's what it's going to be. Damn.
That's definitely not going to hit. I'm 0-1-1.
I mean, that's not going to hit. I just know that's not going to hit.
Fuck. Okay.
All right. Fantasy Fuck Boys.
Then we get a long interview with Cam Newton and Brandon Marshall. Hank? Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo.
What up? My name's Elonian Misconian. Hey, Elonian.
Elonian Misconian. Is that Italian? Misconian.
You a fellow? My stardom? Yeah. Ryan Shazier.
Yeah. Yeah.
He's a literary expert. Guy knows his books.
Guy knows his reading. Volume two.
Well-educated man. Volume one.
How to suck a dick. Volume two.
How to suck another dick. In a butt..
Dick and butts. You suck a dick in a butt? Dick butt kiss.
My sit-em is advertisers. Oh.
Go fuck yourself. Go fuck yourself.
No, I love them. Disagree.
Love them. It was light.
Ice cold. What are you talking about? I'm Elon Muskonian.
Oh, you're Elon Muskonian. Now I got it.
Go fuck yourself. Ah, I didn't understand it.

Earth will judge you.

And my sleeper is Body Armor.

I've been drinking this stuff all week.

It's God's nectar.

I just want to give you guys a cheers.

Cheers.

Cheers, boys.

Cheers.

Body Armor, big cat.

You want to get involved?

Cheers, cheers, cheers, cheers.

Love this stuff.

Love you guys.

Love you guys.

You want to drink some PFT?

Yeah, I certainly do.

Hey, I'm not PFT. What's your name? Hey, what's up, dickheads? Hey, what's up, dickheads? It's me, Tommy DeVito again.
Very excited about not having to work this weekend. It's the Italian way.
Taking a labor break. My stardom, I'm starting Christmas trees.
It's that time of year again.

Christmas trees.

Go get your Christmas trees.

Get your Fraser furs again.

Get your Fraser furs.

Get the pure white.

No, don't get the pure white.

We're doing trees, not pure white.

Pure white.

Santa might be dumping some sack down my chimney, but I want to see you guys dumping those sack up your nose, okay?

Uh, my sit-um is Henry Kissinger.

Henry.

R.I.P.

R.I.P. Rest in piss, bozo.
won't be missed Off a cliff Guy knows a guy Guy Ravel had a beautiful obituary for him He did, he did Do you want to discuss Ravel's obituary? He deleted it, though Very good, very good Yeah, he said incredible life by this guy Nobel Peace Prize, Secretary of State, Nixon board Hired a advisor under JFK. That was the first half of his life.
Incredible. And he deleted it.
And we're not going to say what he did as security advisor on the side. He yada yada yada a lot of shit.
He was kind of the Joe Flacco of international politics. Just throwing bombs.
Yeah. Some of them landed where they should.
Some didn't. Most of them didn't.
Rest in piss, Bozo. You won't be missed.

And then my sleeper this week.

For my sleeper, I'm taking Kenny Pickett.

Yeah. Kenny Pickett.

He's going to unlock.

Yeah.

Like fresh out of jail.

Excited to get back in the real world.

Civilian life.

He was in the middle of the field.

Kenny Pickett.

Big time sleeper.

Okay, what's up, fuckheads?

It's Silvio Berlusconi.

My stardom this week is my guy,by petrino getting rehired in arkansas he's a real pervert like me i love that i fucking love a pervert like that who good who will break his face for his guma he needs a he looks like he needs a book on how to suck a dick with all that neck braces my sit-em is shannon sharp he's brushing his teeth five times a day. Well, yeah, what do you got? The fuck? You got chompers like a horse.
The fuck? Five times a day? The fuck? There'd be blood everywhere if my gums bleeding. And my sleeper, I had Elon Musk as well because he's been sleeping around.
Well, no, he hasn't been sleeping around. He probably sleeps around.
He probably sleeps around. But that fucking coat that he was wearing at whatever the thing was that he was at, I don't even fucking know.
I was at a conference. Show the fuck out.
You're not a fucking Top Gun pilot. You looked like a Tuskegee Airman.
Yeah, what the fuck? He's African-American. Okay, that was a hell.
That really was that Elon Musk press conference. Someone, I can't remember.
Maybe it was Rich Eisen. He's like, I love the new season of Succession.
And it really was like a scene from Succession. His face looks like it's running away from his mouth.
Yeah. Like he looks like he's melting.
Yeah. It's crazy.
Credit to PFT for not drinking the piss there. I went for it.
What do you mean? That's your piss bottle your piss bottle oh fuck i did take a sip out of it oh you did oh fuck that's still your piss bottle oh i forgot to throw away the piss bottle you drank piss just now i just from the last show i just put a little bit on my lips and i was like this doesn't taste good and i didn't want to say anything oh my god he did oh i wanted you to take a bigger sip sip. You took like a little half sip.
Oh, that's gross. You got to throw out your piss bottles, dude.
You want a piss bottle? I know it's day one stuff. Yeah.
Let's go. Hank, you're so good.
Oh, Hank, you're good. You're good, you.
You're good. What a moment.
Listen, I will admit when Hank gets me, it's not often he does. He does.
I thought you knew because you kind of did like a little like. touch your lip.
Here's what went through my mind. You were just talking shit about advertisers.
I took a sip. I took a whiff of it with my nose, and I thought maybe there was some dip spit or something weird in there.
I didn't want to say anything about it because it's body armor. So I put it down, and then I take a little sip.
I'll take a little sip of it. So I just wet my whiffet with my own piss.
Good job, Hank. Take his own piss.
Good job, Hank. Way to go, Hank.
Thank you. Still got it.
I'm proud of you. Still got it.
Okay. Let's get to our interview.
Great interview. We got Cam Newton and Brandon Marshall in studio, brought to you by our friends at Body Armor.
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Here, here they are. Brandon Marshall and Cam Newton.
Okay. We now welcome on a very special guest.
Not too special. Yeah, I mean, NFL MVP, national champion, Heisman Trophy winner, cool hat guy.
Cool hat guy. Appreciate it.
It is Cam Newton. Appreciate it.
He's in the studio. It's an honor.
Yeah, this is an honor to have you here. It's a deal, bro.
I told you before, I fuck with the campaign that you guys are doing. I appreciate that oh and here's brandon marshall so brandon marshall's here as well we just started so these two guys are doing a tour it's called the i am iconic tour yeah uh they're doing a show in chicago where else we got on the tour well before we even get into that what have you guys taken y'all showing a tour no we Why? We're lazy.
Yeah. Oh, my goodness.
Yo, you guys are going to love it. So we travel a lot for work.
Our thing with the tour is that we've always thought that if we were going to go on tour, we'd have to make a show that's different. We didn't want to just sit on couches and do our regular podcast.
So then to come up with a unique show takes a lot of effort. We should do it.
We should do it. It doesn't.
I know you were asking us about to get into what we're doing here and everything, and that's exactly what we were able to do is come together and just like, we're both creative but in different ways, like super creative, and it's like, all right, we have 90 minutes. What does this look like? Right.
Right. Because you can go and it's just like sitting on couches and you think that you're going to see just funky Friday or four to one or, you know, I am Matthew.
And it's not that it's like you get that, but then there's so many different elements. So that's cool.
The live, the live aspect to filling the audience. Yeah.
You know, incorporating them to, yeah. Do you have like any added visual aspects to it because that's something i thought about too if we do a live show it's like we i would want to have something going on above us a little bit make it look different in addition to being a different show i think that's essential uh we have a cigar roller nice you dig in wait so how many how many tours dates are you doing because that's the other part of it is that we wouldn't want to do a tour if we Like we're We try to talk in a national way In terms of sports like obviously we have our Teams but we would feel like If we did like a two or three stop Tour a lot of our fans would be like What the fuck why don't you come to ours The other dates are undisclosed at this particular Moment but we can't we can tell you that this is one of three shows that's leading to the fourth show in Vegas.
Oh, we're actually going to do a live show in Vegas. Yeah.
There you go. Our buddy Hank is going to do an hour of stand-up.
Yeah. He's done stand-up before.
Yeah. Wow.
We're excited about it. It's going to be pretty cool, and it's like how you guys are thinking.
And I hate saying this, like we're here in Chicago. So tomorrow, Wednesday at City Winery for people want to get their tickets and come out and experience it.
It's going to be an experience for sure. but what I hate saying is it's like you know it's going to be phenomenal tomorrow

but as you grow and go like so much more you saying is it's going to be phenomenal tomorrow.

But as you grow and go, so much more you learn.

And it's just going to get bigger and bigger.

When you talk about the elements, video boards and things like that,

we're going to start adding some cool things because we're going to learn as we go.

Yeah.

I like that.

I like that.

Cam, are you retired?

No. No.
No. Officially not retired.
No. Have you been getting phone calls? No.
What's up with that? I don't know. I don't think I will ever retire.
Oh, I like that. Yeah, that's good.
I'm one of those guys. I could see Cam just coming back when you're 45 years old.
Not 45. By that time, I would probably pull the bar stool move

and made some real big strides in the media space.

Okay.

Yeah.

If I were to come back at that particular point in time,

it would be just for the fans.

It would be like Draymond Green.

You could do a podcast and also play.

No, or like that.

No, you did it.

You did it.

That's where Funky Friday was created.

Yeah.

When you was playing with the pets. I did, but I think, no, it's not my stays.
If you had to play a game on Sunday, Brandon, how many catches would you get? I mean, at tight end, I'd get 10 catches. Receiver, three.
Okay, yeah. Slant back shoulder type.
Yeah, it's different out there. Yeah.
It's definitely different. But tight end, you know, you've seen Gonzalez catch 110 balls when he was 40, right? Yeah.
And it's just being savvy and understanding how to get in certain positions. So that position wasn't abreast to his skill set either.
I don't think he does that

in this day and age.

You don't think so?

I don't think that

while Tony Gonzalez

was playing,

I don't think the

outside linebacker

position slash

cover safety

was up to par

what his skill set

was offering.

Guys like,

you know,

Tony Gonzalez-esque, Shannon Sharp-esque. Antonio Gates.
Antonio Gates. Yeah.
Made ways for Greg Olson, Travis Kelsey, George Kittle. Mm-hmm.
But teams were forced, Rob Gronkowski, how can we forget? Yeah. Yeah.
He was a monster. That forced teams to get prepared for this movement of tight ends.
Now we have National Tight End Day and things like that because these guys are really X factors in the space. So you're saying I won't get 10 catches, based on what you're saying.
I'm saying you will not. That's basically what he said.
He said all that to say that I won't get 10 catches. You may get three.
Is Kim always a hater like this? No, he's a realist. I'm a realist.
But I disagree with him because, you know, it's like, all right, stick. We call stick.
Yeah, sticky. Right? Any of those routes.
Like, come on. In coverage, that's an easy game.
And then I also like my matchup versus a safety. There's only probably.
With sticky, you're usually, it's the linebacker. What I'm saying.
Or zone. For For sure.
But that's like zone. Like I can sit at any zone.
I'll say it'd be able to get right there. But I'm talking about even if I have like – you put me outside, you put me outside and I'm match up one-on-one versus a safety, you don't like me on a go-ball back shoulder? I don't think that even happens with that.

Why?

Now, third and two to short,

you could get that matchup.

Oh, there we go.

There's one.

There's a catch.

There you go.

Yeah, there's one.

But now my question is,

my question is,

to him,

it's not how many catches

you would have,

it's how many yards

would you have?

Because that catches is like, Sticky is going to average out by six to ten yards with a broken tackle oh i'm still right now to this day like i'll go run i can run 20 miles per hour i can my speed is still there the problem is when you get older can you stop right yeah that's the problem and then actually that that quick twitch muscle at the line of

scrimmage that's what i'm talking about on the matchup at wide receiver get yeah but if i get the ball in my hand well no the other problem is can you take a hit yeah that's the other thing you're gonna be like oh you hit me like yo your yak would probably be like negative yeah right like i don't want to get hit yeah for sure but even really for you like you play that sport where you could get down.

You know what I'm saying? It's like catch, get down.

Tyler Lockett. Yeah, Tyler Lockett does it.
You hit you down well. Tony did that a lot.
He was not a bruiser. Greg was like that, too.
He was not like one of those guys that's going to deliver the blow. Gronk was a guy that was like, ouch, that hurts.
I'm going to keep battering and boom, boom, boom. Yeah, yeah.

Hold on a time.

Let's get back to Ken real quick.

Because I've been asking him this question every time I get an opportunity.

So you know what I feel?

My gut says that because he's built in his empire, media, da, da, da, da.

I feel like this offseason you're going to put pressure on.

You ain't putting pressure on nobody right now.

Oh, you're going to maybe work out? Yeah, I feel like it's like, yes. I feel like next year is the year you're going to put pressure on.
You ain't putting pressure on nobody right now. Oh, you're going to maybe work out? Yeah, I feel like next year is the year you're going to put pressure on people.
And you're going to be back in the NFL next year. That's not too far off.
See what I'm saying? He has a plan. That's not too far off.
I'm just waiting on somebody to tick me off. Oh, you want us to do it? I don't think you got anymore.
Kim Noon sucks. I think he cares too much about off the field stuff.
He was so bad on the Patriots. Yeah, I really wasn't though.
Look at him now. See? Here we go.
Here comes the comeback. Look at him now.
Kim Noon just doesn't love football enough. I think really me, it's one of those situations where if I'm moved by, I'm going to get moved by.
Right. You know what I'm saying? Right spot, right place, right time.
You can fire up like an Instagram video of you working out with that unusual font underneath. The font.
Can we talk about the font? Yeah. I post my way.
Go download the app right now. It's 99 cents.
You have an app for it? And you can write like you can? It's an app. It's a keyboard.
People always ask, how do you type so fast? If you were to look at my phone right now and pull up how I type, it's a keyboard. So it gives me bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop.
How did you start doing that? This is your app? It's my app, bro. What was the start of this? At one point, did you sit down and you're like, hey, regular text just doesn't have enough flavor to me like i want to make my own fucked up alphabet no it's not fucked up it's more or less if i were to give everybody a sheet of paper right now and i and i were to say we love jake uh blake brodels yeah and you know barstool sports media and everybody has to write that we all wouldn't type it the same.
We wouldn't write the same. Why should we type the same? Like handwriting.
Yeah, but you're putting the onus on, does he text you in the weird font? Bro, yes. Yeah, you put the onus on everyone else.
Yeah. We all have to, when we read it, it's like, what is this? It's one of those things that, yo, we're not used to seeing media like this until Barstool

was created.

Okay.

Now it's like, get in line.

You're changing minds, yeah.

You see what I'm saying?

Do you ever text real?

No.

Never?

No.

Like, what if it's an emergency?

Like, call the ambulance.

You gonna do that weird text and people are like, what is this?

I text my mom.

Look, let me see.

Fill out your taxes online on TurboTax.

You use the fucked up phone? I pay people to do that. Yeah, I forgot.
Yeah, you're rich. That's incredible.
But this was the time. I created it around 2016 when everybody was creating apps.
Remember Kimmoji? Remember Stephmoji? Yes. Like all these different things.
And I was like, yo, I don't want to just create a bunch of uh avatars i was like yo i want to do something that i'm going to to use right and was going strong at the time was like yo like i type and and i didn't know how many different versions of a it was yeah and i was like yo how many is a then you got e then you got i'm yo, I've never seen a Y like that. I was like, yo, I want to create my own app where I could type like this and then boom.
I kind of respect that. So did you ever text Belichick with that? Of course.
Did he ask you any follow-up questions? Or he was like, I guess maybe my phone's broken. Well, no, no, I recant that.
Not Belichick or Kraft, but initially, but over time it was once. Once you got to know them.
Once they got to know me. Right.
Hold on, so you text them in regular font initially? Until the fooling out process? Yes. Okay.
Yes, because I didn't. Look, everything about Cam Newton, in some ways, Brandon Marshall is like, okay, is he who we – here he is.

And I didn't want to kind of spook him a little bit.

You know what I'm saying?

That would have been dope if you, like, were off the top.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Here you go.

Boom.

Like, ready to go, coach.

What's up, coach?

Let's get this.

Yeah, let's get it.

What's the – what is it?

Dos Equis' most interesting man? Man in the world, yeah. Do you think that, I feel like you might be top five in the world.
And he should probably do the spot now. Yeah.
Interesting man in the world. You never see the Dos Equis commercial? Yeah.
People bow down in his. Yes.
People pray. Yes.
But no, I think really, I don't drink, by the way. Well, the reason why i said that is because like the hats and you know the tour you know now we're spending a lot of time together you know what i mean we we talk down there every day it feels like or at least texting with the font the crazy font and so like all right he might hit me at 8 30 in the morning he has the hat on yeah he has a bow.
Like, he's always dressed up. He's Texan in his font.
You know, people always ask that question, like, really? Because sometimes I'll post, like, a little screen grab or whatnot. That's why I say it.
Like, you might be the most interesting dude. Definitely in sports.
Wait, so the hat, I have a question about it. We have a theory, and this is from a fan's perspective.
Did you ever bring a losing outfit too? Because when you lose a game and then you're wearing a yellow suit and a weird feather hat, fans are like, what the fuck? Did you ever think about bringing a losing suit? Never. Never? Never.
One of the things that when people who knew me knew, that whole Super Bowl post-game interview, they knew something was wrong because I'd never enter a post-game without being dressed. Right.
I was still in my field attire. Yeah.
I was just – but to that point, I never wanted to distract myself from the only focus being winning. So bringing a backup outfit would have distracted me to say, well, what if we do lose? I may don't want to look...
Like, fuck that. Maybe get like a trainer, like one of the trainers to have just like a sweatsuit.
You don't have to pack it. Like here, Cam, I got it just in case.
Borrow something from there. You throw three picks, maybe we'll go a sweatsuit.
If anything, I would do the interview in my outfit and then on our way back home I would then change. I ain't changing for shit.
Wait, you put on a bow tie at like 8am? Yes, 7am when I'm taking the kids to school. Do you get dressed up to go to sleep? I get dressed up.
That's a great question. Do you wear pajamas to sleep? Are you fast when I'm going to sleep? That's a great question.
I like you. I like you too, Brandon.
You what? I sleep naked. Okay, cool.
Oh, nice. Me too.
Yeah. We're going to get back to Cam and Brandon in a second.
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You get 24-7 medical support, support a prescription if approved and discreet delivery straight to your door every single month chew it and do it use code pmt get your first month free how about that promo code pmt get your first month for free now back to cam newton and brandon marshall you you had a clip the other day where you were talking about your penis. Say it was small.

No, it's average. Okay.
I don't like that you – yeah, because I know that it's probably not small, and I don't like you – you're encroaching on small guy dick territory. I do have a small penis.
We're encroaching on suspect conversation. Well, I'm just saying you're the one who started it.
No, he started it. No, but you started it with the clip.
Wait, I'm just going to look up and see who started it. Cam Newton penis.
Is this one of those commercials? Is this the commercial where it's like, who said it first? Like, I challenged that? BFT, it's bullshit because he's like, oh, I'm average. It's like, no, that's not fair because I have a small penis and that's not...
This is our block. Get off our block.
Every man hero Cam Newton proudly states he has a very average we're talking six inches we're talking his average is it average for your body size because that's different let's move forward if you got a six inch dick and you're six foot six and that looks tiny listen if you really want to find out make sure you come to City Winery on Wednesday at 730. I'll be happy to give more insight to this question.
And somebody will be finding out later that night. So, Brandon, your IM athlete, what you built has been awesome.
Yes. What's the status of the beef right now that went viral a couple weeks ago? I forgave them.
Okay, so what was the genesis of the beef? Cam Newton, he's really encouraged me to forgive, and the Bible says, you know, 77 times. Okay.
77 times. No, it's not that.
I'm just messing around. Look, we did something special.
And what was it to give the backstory?

Business.

It's just business, right?

Like, you know, when you start out, hey, let's go sell a show, right?

And, you know, there's no deals on the table.

There's no contract signed.

And then, boom, it turns into this cultural,

social phenomenon,

things change, right?

Can I say something?

Yep.

Brandon Marshall

has not and did not do bad business.

Right.

Brandon Marshall is a person

who mismanaged business. That's a good, I don't like how you did that.
So not signing contracts. That's not bad business.
That's just mismanaged. It's like it's also if you have friends involved.
It's always a little bit. It could be conflict of interest.
Right. Right.
Conflict of interest. But yeah.
As you know, you guys built this empire of Barstool that we see Barstool Auburn. We see Barstool fucking nanny.
nanny like it's so many different prefixes of barstool that we see Barstool Auburn we see Barstool fucking nanny like it's so many different prefixes of Barstool that we see now trying to buy shares or trying to buy a piece of the company today is different than trying to buy a piece of the company at 2012 that's facts and I think when you see his situation it's kind of tangled when it shouldn't be that hard to just say, like, yo, bro, I wish we would have had more of understanding of what the real is. Foresight of, yeah.
Rather than just pushing it back, like, yo, we're doing a tour. You know, hold on.
We'll handle this after. And then after that, it's something else that takes on.
And that's where I think. When you're doing it for the first time, too.
Say it again? When you're're doing it for the first time you don't know what you don't know right into it yeah i mean the vision was just to sell the show that was it i wasn't thinking about building a platform and you know even morphing into where you guys are at today that wasn't even it it was like when i went out there and we started having conversations started learning and people were were like, well, we want to own 60% of the IP.

Yeah.

This is during a time in a pandemic where a lot of artists were talking about

ownership and owning your IP.

And so you start learning and then you just, you grow, you get stronger,

you get smarter.

But I would say after the first, you know, once we got into it,

we definitely invested maybe we invest a lot of money into, you know, offers and contracts. You.
Me. Yeah.
And no one else put in money. So, like, that's – yeah, that makes sense.
Like, when I was listening to you explaining, I was like – and so you've forgiven the guys. Here's the reality.
I'll say this and then we could – like, I'm like kind of moving on okay this is what i would say it's like you know what i've learned right in this process it's not bad business like what cam said what you know i've done things that uh were bad for business right and what that means is you know sometimes just taking things too personal right sitting down with some of the guys and you know after six seven months having certain conversations then it's like you know it's back in the locker room or we're on the field in that conversation like no like this is business boardroom talk you got to be able to separate the two you can't take this personal so there's times I may have said things my tone have changed and that's that's that's what's been bad for business right yeah um but no we've invested hundreds of thousands dollars just in attorneys coming in and building out platform and infrastructure and all of those things so they're in a great place like they're crushing it you know and for me my journey is a little different like I didn't now I'm I'm building platform. And so it's going to look a little different, but for sure we'll get there.
And it's a, it's a different type of sacrifices, a different type of risk. You know, I'm a real entrepreneur and I've always been that way.
And there's a lot of opportunities for us. So, um, you know, definitely a journey, a lot, a lot of key learnings.
And I think that it's going to help me as I move forward. Let's let's let me say this, too, because.
The the honesty in me cannot say this enough, but let's be real real and about this, even though we didn't come on here to talk about this, this is part of his story yeah right and it's and what i will hate for this to kind of spin off and you guys take a sound by that it's like oh brandon says he forgives but he doesn't like man look bro i would love oh here he go no other than everybody who has some type of emotion in regards to feeling a certain type of way, good, bad or indifferent. Let's talk.
Yeah. Yeah.
And respectfully, I hate that it's just being extremely honest. Yeah.
Black man making a mockery of business because we're coming together to do good business. And I love what Fred has has become.
Channing has become. Ryan has become this.
This whole space of media is so much out there for everybody to eat. Yeah.
And there's no need for us to say, man, fuck barstool. Barstool ain't shit.
Part of my take shit. They're fraternizing with part of my interruption.
Like, bro, everybody has their own different. That's facts, yeah.
Of their different point of view for certain different things. And just me being around Brandon has just been a breath of fresh air because he's helped me so much.
I can't say that enough. Yeah.
And I told him the only reason why I'm inspired to go on tour was going on the I Am Athlete tour. Yeah.
I seen I was a guest. Speaking of guests, we have Vic Mensa as our guest, you know, for the show.
But I saw that and I was like, yo, I need that. Right.
And I'm looking at my producer right now, Christian Myers, and she came by way of Brandon. Yeah.
You know what I'm saying? And it's so much about life. Fuck business.
It's about harmony. It's about how you two able to put differences aside to say like listen bro we have a due diligence to put a great product in screen that's what we say at the start of every show you know what i'm saying it's incredible what you built brandon like you should be very proud of it for sure it's been awesome to see because you can tell the people that have been guests on your show are immediate they're comfortable that's right they're speaking in a way to you that they don't speak anywhere else in the media.
And you see, like, when you guys were in the league, you talk to a reporter, you do an interview, you do a press conference. It's almost like you got the second thought going through your head the whole time of, okay, what am I not supposed to be saying right now? What are those guardrails that I can't be touching? But when they're talking to you on your podcast, they seem to just open up right out of the gate.
Is there any guess that after you were done with the interview and the cameras are off, just like you all exhale and you're like, that was some deep shit. Yeah.
Yeah. Shit.
Right. I mean, I would say, like, I'm sorry, you asked his ass that question, but I've gotten to know Brandon so well along this three to four-month process that there was clips that we left out, and it wasn't to protect him or to not expose certain things.
It was just like, yo, bro, like, damn, we only got two hours, you know, to put a product together. Like, we should have had a part two, part three.
But I think really for him, and I've called him out on so many different times, where it's like, bro, you change it, man. Fuck that.
We need that dog. I don't need yoga.
You getting soft? I don't need yoga, Brandon. I need fucking, ah, Brandon.
Want me to kick the ball over the fence? Yeah. Kick the mic over the fence.
That was a great punt, by the way.

People don't talk about how great of a punt that was.

That was.

I don't know if you were trying to get off the Broncos.

I don't know what the situation was.

In your pajamas, right?

Behind the scenes.

But you punted that ball.

Crescendo.

Crescendo.

You hit that thing like 60 yards.

That was a nice boot.

Dang.

That was a great punt.

We got to get that dog back in you.

Maybe Cam just should hold a picture of Robbie Gold and just show it to you.

And then you get that dog back in you. Listen.
It picture of robbie gold and just show it to you and then you know i mean back in you listen it's a tough it's a tough it's tough it's tough right because like it's tough it's tough like what works here's my goal my goal is over the next two years i want to morph into more with cam's at right meaning uh over the next two years, I want to just do what I want to do. Right.
I want to morph into more what Cam's at right meaning over the next two years I want to just do what I want to do right I want to do like 20-30 episodes a year people I really want to learn from putting out a show every Monday just because it's the business I'm not into that right like I want to build platform I come in here I'm inspired you know you see the multiple sets I can envision this athlete's podcast this athlete's show you know we have three four five uh five day a week shows live like we're going to do that right and i'm more interested in that than being in front of the camera and so you got to move a little differently but you always got to show up as yourself so you know um it's it's it's a it's a it's a learning, it's a learning process. That's what I would say.
But throughout this process, and we can move on after this, but along this process, I think he's been the punching bag when he should have been getting his flowers. Yeah.
Like real shit. I think there's respect there, though.
I think across the media landscape, people respect. Yeah, and that's also just a part of the internet is when you put yourself out there, people will take you down.
It's forever going to be a point of topic in regards to Brandon, Bartholomew, Tyrone, Beckton, Marshall. I like it.
And while we got y'all attention, before he gets to talking about the – make sure y'all come out to City Winery. Yeah.
Yeah. Check it out.
You mentioned Greg Olson a couple times. His name is in the news today.
I don't know if you saw this yet. I saw it.
You see that? There's a report that he wants to be the coach of the Carolina Panthers. Yeah.
What do you know about – like we know Greg. We like Greg.
He's a good guy. Do you think he's got the right personality to be a head coach or do you think he's just – he wants to stay in the booth, but if your name's connected to a head coaching I think it's a little premature honestly speaking do I think he could be a head coach one day uh yes I think he's extremely thorough I think he's an ultimate professional I think he prepares in ways that he doesn't get or people don't even care to think of a tight end to be prepared that way.
There's times where he finished the play before the play's prefix was even given. It was like, what does this sound like? Hold on.
Hey, guys, guys, hold on. No, we got empty gun trips left like 6.95.
Like, let's go. Let's go.
Snap them. Like, that was who Greg is.
That was pretty compression. But I was with him.
Like, he made me. You know what I'm saying? I made him.
You know that that was that was who greg that's pretty compression you know but i i was with him like he made me you know i'm saying i made him you know that was a guy who you know those relationships in sports in life you know uh you know from his wife to his to his beautiful kids his twins like you just see the man kind of grow. So do

I think he gets the

head coaching

job for the Carolina Panthers?

Who knows? If he gets it,

I'll probably be at more Panthers games

for sure. Would you be

the offensive coordinator? No chance.

And what offense would you

run? I don't think

a lot of offenses really lean

on

the impact of

Thank you. and what offense would you run? I don't think a lot of offenses really lean on the impact of up-tempo offense.
Yes. Yes.
I would have that fucker in high gear. Yes.
High gear. Now, the problem is complementary football because I love whenever a team goes up-tempo and, you know, don't let them sub and, like, just keep keep the pedal of the metal but then if you go three and out and up tempo offense like multiple times and your defense just on the field forever that's why you know a little bit of why Chip Kelly in the NFL maybe it didn't work out because once that once a defense starts stopping the up tempo offense it's like wait time of possession here like our defense is on the field for 70 snaps this is crazy it's a different way of of of ball control yeah and whether it's up-tempo or just ground and pound it's still controlling the clock yeah um but i'm a product of the the fruits of up-tempo offense uh it forces teams to get prepared another thing to work on uh endurance in a in a given week um but also and to the point that you was going to get to we can get to it right now i think a beneficiary who would benefit off of an up-tempo offense is Justin Fields.
Yes. Because a tired lineman does not want to run around trying to chase a quarterback.
He does look good when they go up-tempo. He sounds like a great offensive coordinator.
Yeah. Are you guys think that Justin Fields, like the Bears should keep him? I mean, you know, Brandon, how this city works with quarterbacks it's not maybe the best relationship uh when it comes to like back oh we need to back up we need to move on listen listen I get so much love in Chicago it's unbelievable I left for a couple of years and coming back you know maybe it was a year or so ago I forget how much love was in chicago okay and that last year we imploded and it was a year or so ago, I forgot how much love was in Chicago.
And that last year, we imploded, and it was tough. But damn, I came in September, watched Justin against the Packers opening day, and there was like 100 players there.
And they recognized us at halftime, and they're behind Buckus. I got the second loudest ovation.
And so, like, thanks for the love. But I got to say this.
And they know, the city knows, I'm always going to be real. I wear my emotions on my sleeve.
Leave fucking Justin alone. Yeah.
Yeah. Leave Justin alone.
Get the coaching system right. Because I don't know if they need to.
I'm not in the room. So I don't know if they need a new coach or the coach needs to adjust.
Or an offensive coordinator. But what I'm saying is Justin can be special.
Justin is special. Now I'm putting him in the right situation.
Leave him alone. Leave him alone.
Let him play ball. Let him go out there and play.
What you always say. Keep simple yeah yeah no it's true when when they do up tempo and they let him like be himself he looks great

when you can see that they're trying to make him a just a pocket passer it starts to break down a

little bit see see this is this is the narrative of and i i was kind of judged on this principle people who think they know

people

people

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people people people people people people people See, this is the narrative of, and I was kind of judged on this principle. Yeah.
People who think they know football or sports, Peyton Manning did this league a disservice, right? Okay. By having like, you know, 350 yards passing, you know, four touchdowns, the Brett Favre's of the world, da-da-da-da-da.
All right, here comes Michael Vick. Here comes a Cam Newton.
Here comes Steve Young, right? Here comes these athletic quarterbacks that we're going to get the yards elsewhere, all right? So a typical winning stat line for cam newton is this 208 215 yards passing another 80 yards rushing one touchdown you know either passing or running and three touchdowns in total all together that's upwards of 300 yards in total offense not only that it's it's controlling the clock and you know that gives you know there's chunk plays in there but it's not the prototypical way we're used to seeing yards being made right now when you see Justin last night right he went 10 for 10 but he probably had like 42 yards in those 10 passes yeah it's the it's confidence builders now you're throwing the ball out on smoke screens you're throwing the ball out on bubble screens you're throwing the screens you're throwing this you're throwing that but at the same time when it's time for him to say this is a justin fields moment get the fuck out of his way yeah he's now fresh to do that. Rather than, I would hate systems like this.
Hand the ball off, one yard. Hand the ball off again, a negative two yards.
Now it's third and 12. Yeah, always behind.
And I'm like, yo, bro, I'm not that guy. Right.
You know what I'm saying? Now you got these exotic blitz packages where it's like, hold on. Hey, hold on, hold on.
Hey, 52's the mic here. Why easy, easy, easy.
No, no, no, no, no, no. Hey, 38's the mic.
Hey, let's rover to 52. It's too much.
Right. It's too much.
Just let them go. Let them rock.
So if it's not offensive coordinator, can it be offensive consultant? Teams just hire you to bring you in and just – that's a good one. You make a lot of money.
And if the quarterback gets injured, you can be like, hey, I'm right here. Coaches and organizations, they need to listen to players more.
That is not happening. It's a lot of – If I owned a team and I had a Josh Allen, I had a Justin Fields, I'm calling you.
What do we do? We got to learn from Cam Newton. In 2015 MVP.
What are you talking about here? But we got to turn the page too. We got to turn the page.
But you're not retired yet. Yeah, but you're not retired.
You can't even turn the page. Do you know how to turn the page? Yeah, I'm already on the other page.
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I saw the look that I'm not going to ask you the bad stuff about Florida. But I do want to know just like how crazy was it being on campus with all those guys that we know now were playing there under Urban Meyer.
I mean, you had like Tim Tebow. The Pounceys were down there, right? Of course.
We were in the same draft class. I mean, recruiting class.
It seems like it was the biggest collection of the biggest group of personalities you could ever imagine on campus at one place. Yeah.
My second day on campus, they won a national championship, and it forever changed my mentality of college. Yeah.
At 17 years old, I i graduated early and i was on campus and classes

were canceled because florida was in the national championship i think for the first time in like i think a decade i think it was a spur year this is the last time so i'm like i'm going to class i'm supposed to go to class and i'm looking oh i think i'm in the right place oh class is canceled Wow

Got Pouncey Twins

Got Joe Hayden

Carlos Dunlap

Myself

Aaron Hernandez, rest in peace. Steve Wilkes was a receiver from Lakeland, Ahmad Black.
It was seven of us. Brian Wagner, which was the number one quarterback from junior college, he wasn't kind of in our thing because he was older.
But we were all in the same dorms together.

And I just remember that second day when they won at Chris Leak at the helm.

Obviously, Tim Tebow had a major impact with that.

And seeing that college experience went from University of Florida to Project X.

I was like, wow. My time at Florida was, everything was impeccable.
If it was up to me, I would have never left Florida. But the main reason why I went to Florida was not, it's not happening.
It wasn't manifesting for me. I went there to play football.
I was never going to play football there in ways that I wanted to without hoping somebody got hurt. And I never wanted that to be, you know, like my M.O.
I didn't never want to be like a hater. I was a celebrated person.
Like people saw it later on in my career when somebody scored. I didn't give a damn who scored.
I just was so excited about it. When Tebow went on that run to win a a Heisman in the first he was the youngest person to win a Heisman at that time which was unbelievable I wanted him to succeed I just wanted to play too right and it wasn't enough footballs on the football field right to do that ball exactly so now I was like yo I just to leave because even though even putting more microscope to the situation, they didn't even identify who the backup was.
And I was having a conversation with my dad. I was like, pop, they can't even name the official backup.
Why would I stay here? The point is not to be the backup. The point is to be the guy.

And I don't want to find myself in a situation as a junior or senior

and we're still platooning as, you know, teammates,

which, you know, it is what it is.

But if I could have it my way, this would have happened

had they beat LSU that year when I was at Auburn.

I would have loved to play Florida in the SEC Championship. Yeah.
Oh, my God. I was praying for that.
Yeah. It would have been so many emotions.
What was your relationship like with Urban Meyer? It was stagnant for so many years. I mean, it's not like I got his number now, But the first time I seen Urban was at a Tim Tebow's event.
I think it was like my third or fourth year in the NFL. And they weren't used to people leaving and having success.
That was kind of their thing it was like well what's better than florida

right in 2008 it was title town usa you had joe kim noah in basketball tim tebow chris league and football dan bilzerian you know uh yeah um shit a lot and um you know during that time i didn't think that they knew a rose, you know, could be created from concrete. You know what I'm saying? It was just so hard to believe.
So when I thrust it back on the scene at Auburn, it was like, how could you let this guy leave? Yeah. And everybody was scrambling like, no, he left because it was so many different reports about this, a stolen laptop of this and that and that.
I don't know what he still was doing. I was like, listen, bro.
So what happened when he seen you at Tim Tebow's event? I approached him. Okay, and what happened? I approached him.
And I was like, man, listen, all bygones be bygones, bro. Coach, appreciate you.
You raised me. And a lot of who I am, I owe it urban meyer and especially tim tebow the mentality the grit the preparation the attitude the persona all that i learned it initially from university of florida and then when i went to dream college i would have been a fool not to take on those different uh attributes attributes and ingredients so to speak because we had per had Percy Harvin, Brandon Spikes, Cornelia Singram, Lewis Murphy, Major Wright.
Brandon Siler. Brandon Siler was gone.
He was gone. But these guys were very big personality, hardworking guys that they made working hard cool.

And I wasn't used to that.

You know what I'm saying?

Motherfucker, we're going to get up.

We're going to work.

We're going to whoop some ass.

We're going to party.

We're going to whoop some ass again.

And I was like, oh, that's what we're doing?

And boom, like they was doing it.

I seen Joe Hayden literally, you know, lift two times his body weight

as beer was seeping through his pores that's how much that's what the deal was yeah like yo he parties hard but he gets it though and shit i i i fell in love with that type of mentality so when i went to dream college and i went to auburn i carried those same traits barring i never drank still drank still to this day. You never drank a beer? Never drank a beer.
Not one? Not in my life. Or any hard alcohol.
I'll drink wine. I mean, that's alcohol.
That's basically a beer. Hard liquor, though.
We got a guy here who talks about his sobriety and he still smokes weed and eats mushrooms.

But that's not.

That's not me.

I've never smoked weed. Well, before we switch topics real quick.

Not Jersey Jerry, by the way.

That's Ben Mintz talking about it.

One more question here and then you guys can take it wherever you want.

Oh, shit.

See?

Bortles.

Yeah, that's our guy.

Yeah.

I had that conversation.

Which path was sweeter, the journey to the national championship or the journey to the super bowl good question because you gotta think because as he's talking about like leaving florida being there then going to auburn auburn they were nothing and that iron bowl was right it's going there it's almost like kobe winning in it without Shaq, right? Can I flex? Yeah. All right.
Please. There was two times in my life where I could not do no wrong.
And there was two times in my life that I was 14-0. Auburn, 2015.
That's crazy.

We're undefeated in the NFL.

I'm talking like,

and had I,

and this is a backstory,

we lost a game that I did not practice that week.

At that time,

Carolina didn't have an indoor facility,

so we were practicing.

We were doing a lot of walkthroughs.

The weather was bad, and then the day that it cleared up, my son chosen was born. So I skipped practice and we were having these kind of FaceTime calls.
Like we're putting this in. I was already in Atlanta.
Thank God we played in Atlanta. And my girlfriend at the time had, had chosen and I was like, yo, it was Christmas Eve.

It was just so many different distractions.

So had I had a great week of practice or a week of practice,

it would probably have been undefeated.

Yeah, but I think it had to be Auburn.

Yeah, I thought you would say that.

That's sweet.

With the title, yeah.

Yeah, we won, but everybody knows Auburn is like the little brother to Alabama. And since day one, being on campus, it was like, but we almost beat Alabama.
Right. You know, but I'm like, man, motherfucker, this shit is always to beat the motherfucker.
It ain't to compete. the beat yeah and you know leading is something that i knew it wasn't gonna be a verbal kind of leadership tactic it was gonna be a i'm gonna show you motherfuckers this is how i do it you know i'm saying and as that season kept going, my life completely changed after that Saturday night game versus South Carolina.
And I no longer could go to class. I had it was just a zoo.
And I just remember people were so blown away by the fact that Auburn's winning. They've always had a good defense, but it's the offense.
You know what I'm saying? And people also forget that I was only at Auburn for 12 months. Yeah.
Dang, in and out. Left quite an impression.
I mean, listen, what God has for you, bro, is for you, and there's no denying that. So, man, I made an impact.

I just threw a quick jab and got the hell out of there.

So that altered my approach to the NFL, too, because leaving Florida,

I was at Florida longer than I was at any other school.

I was at Florida for two years, JUCO for one year.

We won a national championship in junior college as well.

Then I won a national championship at Auburn. But I'm not – I don't have off seasons with people.
You know what I'm saying? And like you guys know, like after this show, whatever, like you guys, families may connect or you may say like, bro, it's Thursday, bro. Like it's half off wings.
Like this is our deal. I never had that in college.
Everybody was getting to know. It's like, Hey yo, I think that's Ken.
That's the the new quarterback, five-star guy. Yeah.
Damn, he big as hell. Like a ghost.
Yeah. In and out.
Yeah. So when I got to Carolina, that was something that my teammates was like, bro, you're going to be here for a long time, more than just a year.
You got to lean into, you know, people and relationships. Yeah.
Interesting. And it fucked with me because, know i came on i came my fault but i came on a team where steve smith was trying to leave and he would he would tell me all the time he's like bro like i want to win yesterday right like i don't want to rebuild i was part of rebuilding phases, you know, the majority of the times that I was here.
And, you know, Jordan Gross, Ryan Khalil, these guys are really just saying like, bro, that's not it. No, you don't do that.
You can't just go a week without talking to nobody. Like, people, they saw Cam is sulking from, you know, losing and things like that.
But the truth of the matter was that I didn't know how to lose because I didn't lose for two years. Yeah.
Right. Think about that.
That's a good point. It makes sense.
Yeah. I never lost.
It's like a prize fighter. You know what I'm saying? It's like I went to JUCO.
And really for three years, because when I first got to Florida, we won a national championship. Then we had an off year, still won.

And then that following year, Tebow wins the Heisman, and we win the national championship again.

That year I left.

Now I'm taking those attributes and saying, all right, in junior college, what am I going to do?

Win.

Okay, boom, we win a national championship there.

Then when I got to Auburn, what are we going to do?

Win.

We won that.

And I was already a professional prior to, to like i wasn't in the moment like after the national championship everybody went back to auburn and they celebrated they rolled too much corn and they had a good time what i do i go to fly to la and like the team's going to auburn or alabama i'm flying to la to do David Letterman. Yeah.
Right. Yeah.
That's why you should never draft a quarterback who wins a lot in college. Yeah.
Draft a bunch, draft a loser. Interesting.
No. And they'll be ready to lose in the NFL.
But it's just still a process. It's still a process.
And man, that was some of the things that I had to do a lot of soul searching and realized like a lot of what I thought was was winning energy is not and it's a different monster in the NFL and guys like Bryce Young have to know and and like Justin Fields it's a process from the from the fans from ownership to the management it's a process and the the the best that we can get them comfortable the better off they're they're going to be i'm curious to know because you talked about forgiveness a couple times um have you ever made forgiveness with rosemary plorin do you know who that is does that name ring a bell to you she wrote a uh a letter to the charlotte observer back in like 2015 because she took her daughter to a game. Do you remember this letter? Hold on.
Were y'all just talking about this? We're talking about celebrations. This was after the game of the Nashville Tennessee Titans.
Just talking about it. She said what? This is Rosemary's letter.
An all-time letter to the editor. I actually think they sold hundreds of thousands of papers because the letters to the editor regarding cam newton yeah you got a lot of people mad they were fire um here's what rosemary said because of where we sat we had a close-up view of your conduct in the fourth quarter the chest puffs the pelvic thrusts the arrogant struts and the in-your-face taunting of both the titans players and the fans we saw it all because your role model your behavior brought out the like behavior in the stands some of panthers fans in our section began to taunt the hometown fans many titans fans booed you a few offering instructive but necessarily family friendly suggestions on how you might change your behavior my daughter sensed the change immediately and started asking questions won't he get in trouble for doing that is he trying to make people mad do you think he knows he looks like a spoiled brat i didn't have great answers for it honestly in an effort to minimize your negative impact and what was otherwise a really fun day i redirected her attention to the cheerleaders and the mascot so uh because you i think you dabbed i think you dabbed in rosemary's face.
Dabbed, yeah. And she was like, that's disgusting.

How do I explain that to my daughter?

Well, the hip thrust, that's not a part of my celebration.

She's talking about like your Elvis.

Yeah.

No, that, so that comment led to what we saw on the Thanksgiving game with the Cowboys, because I think we played them next that following week. So I did the twist.
Oh, yeah. That was like my kind of, hey, I heard you talking.
Maybe I'm going to do a dance that you can relate to and then do the little thing and then add my thing at the end. Yeah.
So it never I was so comfortable in my skin. I've always been the outcast, even in my family and being misunderstood, being stereotyped.
So when I see different, it doesn't it doesn't make me go away like most people is if anything it makes me interested interested into that person that thing that whatever it is and hell different yeah i'm like yo hold on let me get my own perspective about what this is right and that article is just a perfect example of what my career was because i

i me get my own perspective about what this is right and that article is just a perfect example of what my career was because i a lot of people took chances on me um brad franchione uh my um head coach at and junior college uh gene chizik gus malzahn uh curtis looper uh trooper taylor like these guys in ed albert chiswick was the reason i landed at ucf believe it yeah gene chiswick and and even with marty herney and and ron rivera drafting me or or big cat um um mr richardson drafting me number one overall like these things are a reason why it's like bro it's okay to be different but I think I always say this that's the number one reason why we have racism prejudicedness sexism any type of grouping in this country because people aren't curious to find out for themselves. They make their preconceived notion like, why does he wear his hair like that? Instead of saying, hey, Cam, are those dreadlocks? Rather than just saying, no, I don't like it.
It looks nappy. You can ask the same question, though.
So what you're saying, you can be like, why are you wear your hair like that? Or you can be like, why do you wear your hair like that? Yeah. Like, there's curiosity.
Yeah, intellectual curiosity is something that's lost. I've had it so many different times where, no, they will never say, like, why do you wear your hair like that? They just won't say anything.
No, that's what I'm saying, though, but to your point. Tell me why you wear your hair like that.
Yeah, like, there's a curiosity to it. Then there's, like, a judgment to it.
You can ask the same question. I do want to say this real quick.
This dude, I want to give you your flowers. You're really good at what you do.
We know you, Big Cat. We obviously know you guys have been doing this a long time.
But one, you're a really good reader. Okay, so Rosemary, you know.
Good reader. And like you do your fucking, your research.
I appreciate that. You are super talented and I want to give you your flowers.
Thank you. Thank you, Brad.
You guys are really good too. I appreciate that.
I appreciate that. You are super talented, and I want to give you your flowers.
Thank you. Thank you, bro.
You guys are both really good, too. I appreciate that.
I appreciate that. Flowers for both of you.
We were having this conversation, right? So he was like, yo, bro, you're an athlete, and you're doing all this media stuff. I'm like, no, bro.
Don't consider me an athlete. I'm a YouTuber.
I like that. Hey, so Big Cat just fucked with me.
Yeah. I just did my show and then uh one of my producers was like yo can we just take a couple pictures for you and then he don't even know what he did but he just shit it on my whole parade he was like oh youtube yeah no yeah youtube i remember those days no no what it is it's so funny because our guys do do the same thing where they have a camera and they come up to you and they're like, all right, I need to take a couple pictures.
And they're like, act mad. Act happy.
Be surprised. And I'm like, there's a YouTube thumbnail.
Like, what the fuck? It was joking, but the way you said it was just so. Yeah, yeah.
YouTube. YouTube.
Yeah, I remember those days. I had one last question.
This has been awesome. Everyone do listen to I Am Athlete, fourth and one.
Go out to the I Am Iconic tour when they're in your city. My last question was a rowback question, R-H-O-B-A-C-K.com, promo code TAKE.
20% off first purchase Q-Zips, polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts. So this is a theory that I stumbled upon a couple weeks ago with the Broncoscos right now it applies to the broncos and i was like as soon as we get another uh you know couple guys on who played in the league i'd love to get their take the broncos season has turned around because the theory is that trade deadline happens they're supposedly.
They're going to sell everyone off.

And then nothing really happens.

And then they have everyone in that room and they're like, this is what we got.

And we no longer have to think about who's leaving, who's coming, what are we doing.

Now we just got to figure it out ourselves. Did that happen in locker rooms where you had a moment in the season where it's like, okay, this is us.

We're not getting outside help.

No one's leaving.

This is us.

We got to go figure it out ourselves. Yeah, so I'm going to be very direct here as to why this season turned around.
Okay. Starts with leadership, and it starts with one guy, Russell Wilson.
This is a guy that walks into the locker room, into the facility every day, and he change he doesn't fold even when it fucking hurts yeah it's we've said he feels it hurt yeah he feels it and that's leadership i show up at this at the the same time every day win or win or lose we're gonna have this tuesday meeting win or lose i'm just pepping my step on the practice field win or lose. You know how many people fold in those moments, change up? Player coaches try to act tough.
Tough coaches try to be player coaches. No.
That's it. Now, obviously, defensively, they go from last year top five, then they turn into the worst defense in the league, okay? And then all of a sudden, they switch.
Van Joseph, he turns it around. So that's a big deal.
Yeah. 16 turnovers through this five-game win streak, only giving up 20 points.
Huge deal. But you got to understand, like, when a Cam Newton walks in a room, a Russell Wilson walk in a room, like, they're the – what is it? The thermostat.
Like, they're the one that's going to set the tempo so if you got your head down everybody else gonna get there put their head down pack it up russell wilson for two years a year and a half came in and just stayed the same but he definitely felt it for sure and so my theory is that the turnaround happened because russell wilson and his unwavering faith he never, even when it hurt. I like that.
Cause it's true. There were some tough times.
He was, he was getting shit on a lot. Ourselves included.
I think people don't give the respect to the process enough credit. And of course leadership right but nobody believes or gives moral victories for losing there's so many different times where a game was to be won if this would not have happen some are not, you can't come back from certain mistakes happening.
A blown coverage, a holding penalty, a bad play, a la this past weekend, Auburn and Alabama. Those games are decided.
Some mistakes are forgiven. Some mistakes aren't't certain processes with a team to say like

yo we're three and five right now that doesn't make us a bad team we just had some bad breaks that three and five those five games that we lost may have been a great play by the opposing team a missed holding call call in coverage. Nobody cares about us not losing, you know, a one score game.
But the reality of it is we're not too far away, right? Sometimes you get rewarded for insufficiencies and calls, and sometimes you get punished for insufficiencies and calls. with that being said it's just like it's not

necessarily luck it's just the process when teams are bumping they have a good locker room leadership is their skill is there uh that cohesion is there and you see it so yeah with the denver broncos is it is it something to to put your finger on one thing it's like no it's like they never was off outside of the game with the Dolphins.

They got the shit.

Yeah, and to your point, to Cam's point, to piggyback off of that, opening day they played the Raiders 17-16. You know, how do we correct that? Yeah, they were right there, yeah.
And you played the Commanders 35-33, and then you had a Dolphins game 70-20. Big but then you come back and you play the Bears you win 31-28 and then you lose to the Jets 31-21 these are all winnable games and even if you watch you know the Broncos lose to the Chiefs I think that was Thursday night football or Sunday night football it was 18-19 but they weren't in that game until the fourth quarter.
It's an afterthought.

Yeah.

People forget that.

I'm sorry, go.

No, no, that's it.

But it's like bringing the two together.

It's like when you are in the valley, when you're in the trenches, when you're faced with adversity, how do you show up?

Right?

I mean, some of the great ones that I've seen, like even Eli Man like the end of my career did the same thing every single day he sat in the same seat every single day he ate the same food every single day no matter what I can't you he just always say I can't break routine hey bro we just landed in Detroit let's go to dinner I gotta go get a massage I can't break routine it's like you know, so the leadership there has, I'd say, I said go to dinner. I got to go get a massage.
I can't break routine. It's like, you know, so the leadership there has.
I said this at dinner last night. And Mike Shula told me this.
It's never as good as you make it seem, and it's never as bad as you make it seem. It's about your perspective, though, right? And offensive football is the ultimate team sport not defensive football not special teams it's offensive football and when you sit back and you just think about so many different determining factors with football as a whole the greats the br the Bradys, the Mannings, the you name it, right? Bortles.
Bortles, right? I'm pretty sure he's had, Blake Bortles we're talking about, he could have been a Super Bowl winning quarterback. He should have been.
He got hosed in that AFC championship. Come on now.
yeah but nobody talks about that that's the afterthought for so many different people you just yeah those things was it an onside kicker it was miles jack miles jack was ruled down he wasn't down yes those things people don't remember but when you go back and you watch these games and for thanksgiving we saw um they had the the cam bow of the cam back the bowl the iron bowl

and I was remember looking at this game and I was saying I said what if he would have dropped that ball what if Antoine Carter punched the ball out from Mark Ingram while he was running and the ball just rolled miraculously 20 yards to get a touchback.

I'm like, yo yo these things don't like what if what if uh the charles woodson sack was called a fumble yeah but yeah you know what if adam venantieri would have just said you know fuck you i'm gonna miss this you know like it's what if it's so many what ifs in sports that after you lose, no one cares. Yeah.
And, but the reality of it is, it's not as good as you make it seem. It's not as bad as you make it seem.
We're not too far off, fellas. Yeah.
We're three and five as a record, but we're not a three and five football team. The great coaches will their guys to believe in that.
The great players lead their team to saying, let's put this into perspective. We still have a chance.
If you catch it sooner enough, those are unforgivable mistakes. Leaning on rookies.
You get an asshole guy that comes in, first round draft pick, he's new to money, he buy the bentley's and the roses and all things that it's like motherfucker hey we need you to make sure that you know what you're supposed to do on these checks right right when i get corner cap motherfucker look you running your regular route i don't got time for you to run a 15 yard dig bro you got to do an auto fade bro coach went over that all week matter of fact i'm gonna tell tell you when I tap my helmet bro even though it's going to be subtle I see a three tech in the shade right here that's equivalent to third and six to eight this coordinator loves this blitz he's blitzing off your like those things when they get it you've been watching tape huh yeah I'm like oh shit tape. Yeah.
Watch this. I'm like, oh, shit.
Okay. He coming.
You got it. It's a great answer, though.
Yeah. But when you get guys like that and you're saying like, yo, bro, hey, you do it.
And then he sees it. But boom, he said, why didn't he say that? You're expecting him to run a back shoulder fade or to auto fade.
You throw it in anticipation. It's a pick six.
You come to the sideline like, yo, bro, what's going on? You like man fuck that get out my face it's like no bro that cost us the game right we was trying to tell you this shit in wednesday meeting but you motherfucking looking at your phone dm and shit like it's you worried about your food man fuck your food like those type of things the ones who get it get it. Did you ever go too far with that? Like getting on somebody? I had to get some straightening.
But a lot of people just think shit's sweet, though, because of the hats and the outfits and things like that. Well, you guys have been crushing it.
We appreciate you guys coming by. Anytime you're in Chicago, we'd love to have you come by.
Don't tell this guy that. Yeah.
I am athlete, fourth and one. I'm iconic.
Tori. No, you guys can come tomorrow if you want.
If you want to come by. Can I bring us cigars too? Yeah.
I need to shoot my show tomorrow. Oh, all right.
Then you're in. All right, thank you.
Yeah, we got a studio for you. No problem.
No problem. But yeah, Cam Newton, Brandon Marshall, thank you guys.
We really appreciate it. This was a low lift, bro.
Yeah, appreciate you guys. Fire Fest of the Week is brought to you by Coors Light.
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Okay, Firefest of the week.

Wrapping up the week.

Great week.

Great football weekend coming up. One of the best of the best hank henry i'm sick what is your what are you sick with i have been sneezing a lot i have a stuffy nose uh mucusy mucusy what penis voice stool throat uh and i just took a shower i just took like one of those like one hour showers the other day where i was just like i don't even want to get out of the shower oh you get trapped in the shower do you have body aches you have covid i don't think so i don't know i might just get tested no don't but yeah nothing nothing nothing too crazy this week.
I don't want you to give me... Wait, I don't want Hank to give me COVID.
Well, I just want to get better for this 24-hour stream. Jake is taking out his mask right now.
No, I was looking... I was looking at my backpack of medicines to see if I had anything that could help you, but I don't.
That would be funny if you had COVID and you gave it to Max during the live stream but the 24 hour stream is is is yeah it's gonna be fun whatever you have now you're going to improve just enough to still be contagious and feel better and then give it to max i'm excited about that yeah i'm not excited it'll be i'll you know try to make as fun as possible you guys said no phones which is you is absolute bullshit because if it was one of you two, you would never allow that.

What do you mean?

You guys would never go 24 hours without your phones.

Yeah, I would.

Oh, you wouldn't?

No, and Hank brought this up to me when we were talking,

and he goes, that's bullshit because you would never do that,

and I said, you're right.

I would personally do it, yeah.

And that's a great response.

He's right.

I'm with Hank here. That's true.
Right, so I admit that he's right. What do we do now? I don't know.
Be fair. Be honest.
Be good. Maybe be better with your Mount Rushmore guesses.
So to me, I lobbied to give you phone check-ins. Well, you guys fucking rigged the votes.
Shut up, Hank. Rigged the votes.
Shut the fuck up, Hank. You gave up.
You fucking said no one knew that. What's his name? Jerome Bettis was on the Rams.
That's a fact. It was like a question of the year.
He was. He was also all pro as a rookie on the Rams.
We're not doing this. No, Hank, I wanted to give you access to your phone once every like two hours.
Check your texts only to see if there was an emergency. I would be down for that.
We should be able to earn some phone time. Okay, yeah.
We'll do that. We'll do that.
We'll earn some. We'll earn some.
We'll earn some. You're going to love how you earn it.
One kiss, five minutes. A little Shazier.
Whoa. Are you talking about blowjobs or anal sex? He sent two books Sending volume two Of the ultimate guide Gotta know what changed There must have been like a FaceTime or a follow up Like there was the text conversation Yeah it felt like we were missing holes A little bit like kind of flirtatious kind of not And then just then just like, hey, what's up? Bam.
How to give a blowjob. How to do anal.
Volume two just being like, I regret the chapter in volume one that said use a lot of teeth. Update.
Do not use a lot of teeth. All right.
Good fire fest. Thanks.
Sick boy. Sick boy.
Okay. My fire fest of the week is that there's something that I've got set up on my phone.

Straight piss. Shut the fuck up.
Yep. No, and that's actually not the worst thing that's happened to me this week, believe it or not.
I've got something set up on my phone where when it connects to my car speaker automatically, it starts blasting a song, right? And on full volume on my phone. I don't know how I set this up on my phone.
Now, for a lot of people, it's like, oh, the U2 album starts playing

or something that you have in your iTunes library.

I've downloaded very few songs onto my iTunes library.

I usually use Spotify.

But one song that I have downloaded is the one that starts playing,

and it's absolutely going to fuck me over at some point.

As a joke, I downloaded Eminem's song, Fack, F--a-c-k and it is maybe the worst song of all time right it's i'm gonna fight game calm yeah that song it's banger it's so bad it i actually do think it's the worst song of all time and every time i sit down in my car at max volume on my speaker it's m&m being like i'm gonna eat that pussy and it's it's bad it's really it's bad fortunately enough for me i've been driving i haven't had any passengers in my car since it started which is like three four days ago but there's going to be a time when somebody who should not listen to that song hops into my passenger seat and it starts talking about Eminem getting his dick sucked.

Yeah, that's tough. That's really tough.
When I had the Mazda, it used to do that. I listened to music on Spotify.
I also shout out to everyone. Spotify raps.
Very nice. Always fun to see.
Yeah, that was great. So I don't listen to Apple Music and all my iTunes would just be me downloading the podcast recordings onto my computer so I could edit.
and so when i would get in my car it would just randomly start playing a recording session of the podcast where we usually record for like 30 seconds or a minute before we start yeah so it would just be like a random conversation of whatever we were talking about from like two years ago which is always just like a fun let's see what we were talking about this day yeah sometimes i'd be like oh shit yeah. I'm just going to read verse two because this is the verse that it's stuck on from Eminem.
Okay. Parental advisory.
If you've got kids in the car, turn it up. Oh, yeah.
God. Oh, wow.
Boom that pow. Oh, wow.
I need a cigarette now. Ow.
I'm so fucking hot and you're so fucking hot. Oh, my God.
I want a fucking fact. No, not fuck.
I said fact. F-Ak f-a-c-k fuck fuck fuck fucking freak me oh yeah girl see baby they call me mr freaky let's call your sister three-way have some threesome me so horny and you're such a fucking babe i want to go down on you fuck you shaved oh goddamn here i go again i'm going to come i am so that's what plays in my car jesus every time i sit down and start it up and it's at when i say max volume i mean maximum volume yeah in my car damn so i gotta straighten that out that's a lot otherwise i'm gonna have some spleen to do yeah um all right my fire fest is i also was sick i had a stomach thing that was a battle i battled i lost like probably 10 pounds though so that's pretty cool you look great yeah thank you uh i do need a haircut um and then i also i have a game of the year on saturday uh the sec championship over so the fire fest uh because it takes a lot out of me and i'm already weakened by the diarrhea so i'm i'm already in a fragile state now i have to get my strength up I hope you win thank you Jake what Max that's loser talk no that's not loser talk I'm saying I battle hard it's a fire fest it's a pre I don't know if my body is ready.
I need to get rest.

I need to sleep.

Last time I lost a game of the year, I got sick for a month.

How many games of the year do you have in one year?

Usually like three or four.

I feel like your game of the year, the SEC title game every year. I love it.

I love it.

It's going to be so much fun to watch that game.

I'm so excited to watch that game.

I love that game so much.

It is going to be great.

I think this is the best weekend of football that we've had in quite some time. Yeah.
And we have the crown jewel on Sesame Street. And the crown jewel capping it off.
Did you see Triggs, the guy that does the cover art for Part My Take? Tremendous artist. Awesome.
Very talented guy. He made a flow chart of which teams are going to get into the playoffs.
I love that. Depending on who won.
Yeah, it's psycho-behaved. Max didn't understand.
It's very complicated. No, it's very simple.
I was sitting at my desk. Memes can attest.
I was looking at this thing for five minutes, like five minutes, just going through everything. I'm like, still don't get it.
Very simple to follow. No, I did end up getting it.
I did end up getting it. There's just a lot of arrows.
Here's the thing, Max. We have not been exposed to that.
If we had seen that every year during this weekend, where it's like, here's the college football playoff flow chart. Then we grew up seeing it, and it's normal to us.
But this is the first time I've ever seen four teams with the arrows. Here's what happens.
Here's what happens. It took me a good like 10 seconds of staring at it.
It's okay. Now I get it.
He correctly, like an hour. He correctly to like the Ohio state fans, they have a path, but they don't realize, because I was talking to big ever earlier.
They need Washington to sneaky win because if Oregon beats Washington close, why would Washington not be the one, the one lost team? Yeah. And Triggs actually called that out perfectly.
That happened last year, right? The Buckeyes snuck in after losing to Michigan. Yeah, there was not as many undefeated teams.
Okay, Jake. I can't parallel park.
I was home in Florida. No, duh.
I want to say something so bad, but I can't. I can't.
You can say it. No, I can't.
I honestly can't. I have zero room to talk to you about maneuvering a car in a parking lot.
But you can say it. No, I'm not going to say it.
But if you were to say it, what were you going to say it? I'm not going to say it because then obviously I had an unfortunate moment where I was a bad driver, so I can't talk about it. Yeah, but it's really hard to do.
No, it it's not. It's really not.
In Florida they don't make you do that. They just make you do a regular park.
But with, is it a newish car you were driving? Yeah. They put it on easy mode.
Yeah it is. Like it used to be old man yelling a cloud like when we were growing up you have to like the first car you drove like you had to like really parallel park yeah last like five years they've made it so easy all the cameras all the sensors it's a fucking job i actually miss it a little bit i've never had a camera you've never had a camera no so yeah so you know old school yeah parking i need to get a car i just got my so you don't even well of course you don't have a car you don't have a car no well i just got rid of my car before i moved to chicago got it i um i never had a camera until this car and it's easy mode it's easy mode but also i've done it for what like a month two months and immediately i'm finding myself being like how did i ever do this before yeah no it's bad it's like when when they first invented gps yeah you're like wait you had to look map ahead of time.
Yeah. And then you had to know what the different roads were and memorize all that shit.
You used to print out MapQuest. You could even before MapQuest.
Yeah. Where it was like, here's a giant road atlas.
My dad used to like, we'd pull over and you'd just look at a fucking map. Yeah.
Like, we're going to get off at this place. What? That shit happened all the time.
What the fuck are you talking about? And you had to like follow along on the road. You had to, it was like, it was some advanced shit, but immediately now that I've got a backup camera and the sensors and all that, I don't think I could go back.
Yeah. Wait, so Jake, were the backup cameras like you weren't looking at them? Because that, I'll back you up in the fact that like sometimes I don't trust.
No, I was looking, I just didn't. You just didn't know how the car moved? Yeah.
It was my first time driving the car. I don't really drive frequently anymore.
Oh, it's the first time. That doesn't mean you don't know how to parallel park.
I mean, I don't. Okay, yeah, that also probably.
When I had a car in high school, I couldn't do it. Okay.
You know what the most exhilarating thing is? When you have an audience that's watching you parallel park. Oh, it's so easy.
Hold on, Jake. I got a question.
I got a question. I really hope the answer to this is not going to be what it is.
Have you ever gotten out of your car and had someone else park it for you? No. Oh, thank God.
No. That would have been bad.
That is the ultimate cuck move. Yeah.
Mount Rushmore cuck moves. We'll do that next summer.
That like to be like, hey, can you please help park my own car for me? No, I'll just leave and find a different spot.

That would be, yeah.

If I can't get in there.

All right, Jake, you're okay.

Or sometimes the person leaving in front of you leaves, and then it's much easier.

Yeah.

You know what one of my favorite moves to do is?

Is when you see somebody about to parallel park, you just walk out there and you start helping them.

Yeah, direct them.

Yeah.

Without being asked.

Yeah.

And it's like, I got you, buddy.

Yeah.

Kind of a first responder.

Yep.

Okay.

Let's finish up the show.

Numbers?

18.

that's a good idea. him yeah without being asked yeah and it's like i got you buddy yeah kind of kind of a first responder yep uh okay let's finish up the show numbers 18 17 71 20 8 8 evident memes evident memes what'd you say three 11 for pug 11 Pug I I am pug 3 for memes 97 has that hit here before I don't know I feel like 97 has good thing I can check pardonmyballs.com 97 has not hit yet that seems like a website 4 in the 90s have hit that That's a website that's like selling some kind of weird thing.

You got to put on a wall. Shout out to David who made it,

and he gave me the access to start editing the data.

Love you guys.

We've had 95 and 96 hit.

Yeah. I'm a tick, tick, tick.
Tick, tick, tick. Hold my love.
Tick, tick, tick. Tick, tick, tick.
Hold my love. Thought I could read the signs.
I couldn't see it. But now I realize.
You're making me believe it that every space to drain. Show me what you need to make you believe that all of these remains.
A frozen memory. It's a good one, you and me.
I didn't want it to be over Thank you. All of this remains A frozen memory A girlfriend you and me When I want it to be over You've got my wife and finally see You're my energy You're my energy Tick, tick Tick, tick, tick Roll my wheel on a tick-tock Thank you.
We'll be right back. Now I know we can't escape it Maybe you could be the one

All of these remains

A frozen memory

The good from you and me

We don't want it to be over

You can pass my wife and finally see

You're my energy