NFL Week 5, Fastest 2 Minutes, The Cowboys Got Whomped, Lions Are For Real And Tons More

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Speaker 1 On today is part of my take week five of the NFL.

Speaker 1 Boys, I think we're starting to find out who the contenders and pretenders are. Great week five.

Speaker 1 A lot to discuss. I just burped.
We are also taping Surviving Barstool. No spoilers.

Speaker 1 So we're in the New York City office, and we had Jake, memes, and Max write boomers for us today because we were doing a shitload of stuff during our football Sunday. But a great show coming.

Speaker 1 Let's see if we can maybe do a show where we don't offend the entire world. I disagree.
Okay, all right. Maybe we'll offend the entire world.

Speaker 3 What are some of the big demographs out there that we can really lay into?

Speaker 1 Yeah, Hank's right. We could just maybe talk about the Middle East.
Okay, yeah, let's do it. What are your thoughts on Israel? The rivalry of Israel.
Oh, wow, Jake, okay, here we go.

Speaker 1 We're already in it. We're in it.
We're in it. All right.
So great week five. NFL.
Who's back of the week? Boomers.

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Speaker 1 Okay, let's go.

Speaker 1 Boy!

Speaker 1 Boy!

Speaker 1 Now in the street, there is violence,

Speaker 1 and then a lot of

Speaker 1 work to be done.

Speaker 1 No place to hang out or washing,

Speaker 1 and then a candy game all on the sun.

Speaker 1 Oh no, we're gonna rock down to Elite Trick I Venue

Speaker 1 And then we take it higher.

Speaker 1 Oh, we're gonna rock down to Elite Trick IV.

Speaker 3 It's part of my my take. Listen about Marshal Sports.

Speaker 1 Welcome to Part of My Take. Today is Monday, October 9th,

Speaker 1 week

Speaker 1 5.

Speaker 1 These boomers are brought to you by the law firm of Memes, Max and Marsh.

Speaker 1 The three M's, the Eminem Boys.

Speaker 1 We start London where Zay Jones got the scoring started as he girl boss Slade his way to a touchdown. But it was Etienne that had the Bills defense frightened all day.

Speaker 1 Etienne, Etienne, I'm frightened, Etienne. DivaWatch was in full effect when Stefan Riggs was crying like a man leaving Pinehurst.
Jaguars 25. Bills 20.
That was a good one, memes.

Speaker 1 We move down to the Steel City where you can throw out the record books when the Ravens and Steelers get together. These two teams don't like each other.
There's no love lost.

Speaker 1 Justice Pill alleviated any symptoms of butterflies from Baltimore fans entering his game when he scored an early touchdown.

Speaker 1 Miles Kiliprouski screamed, The mountains are blue, when he blocked a punt for a safety to give the Steelers some momentum.

Speaker 1 And the game-winning touchdown was scored by George Pardon by Pickens tenders. You're the plug god, boom.
I am, I really am. The Steelers 17, the

Speaker 1 Ravens, 10. Off to Detroit, where Samilton Laporter told the Panthers defense, you play ball like a girl.
Carolina couldn't pickle the beast.

Speaker 1 That was Jared Goff, who is hotter than Wendy Peppercorn today, throwing for three touchdowns.

Speaker 1 In another edition of the run, David, the Jet Montgomery, stole the show by running for 109 yards and a score. And there is no need to squint at the standings, Lions fans.

Speaker 1 Your team safely remains in first place. Lions 42, Panthers 24.
What? What?

Speaker 1 In Miami, Devon Jackie A-Chan karate kicked his way into the end zone for the Dolphins.

Speaker 1 The New York football Giants have their backs against the waller and things look pretty grim early on until Joseph Pinaknock, who's there, scored on a pick six to give the G-men life.

Speaker 1 But in the end, Tua Donny Darko caught the Giants' defense sleepwalking and tossed the ball to Ty Greek Hill, who played Euro ball when he scored a touchdown and enjoyed some cheetah bread in the end zone.

Speaker 1 The Dolphins 31. The New York football giants, 16.

Speaker 1 We head north to Indy, where Zach I'm a boss moss said, fuck it, I'm going to run for 165 and two touchdowns.

Speaker 1 There may be a running back controversy in Tennessee as Derrick Henry Ford is breaking down and Ty J Britney Spears is saying, gimme, gimme more, gimme, gimme more. Josh Clowns, it's Britney bitch.

Speaker 1 Josh Clowns, the Tennessee secondary, as the rookie had his coming-out party that helped bury the Titans for good. The Colts 23, the Titans 12.
Someone wrote this down as Titans 12, Colts 23.

Speaker 1 What is this? Europe? That's backwards. That's backwards.
Sounds like the Colts put Tennessee in a conservatorship. Also,

Speaker 1 I think the Titans didn't have 12. I think they had more than 12.
We head over to LA, where Jalen Hey Mistakata, he is him, was dominating the Ramso line. Jalen flirts.

Speaker 1 On offense, the Eagles continue to push it. Uh, push it.
Uh, push it real good.

Speaker 1 Push it real good.

Speaker 1 Pooper, Pooper Cup,

Speaker 1 Poopa Nakua, and Pooh Atwell were sitting on the Eagles secondary, but it wasn't enough to take down the Dirty Birds. The Eagles 23, the Rams 14.

Speaker 1 In Denver, the Jets joined the Mile High Club as Bryce Hufton Puffed and blew Russell Wilson. Pause.
Down.

Speaker 1 Robert Salah was screaming, Wilson, get on the ball as he let the clock run down to end the half. Adam Mike Troutman scored despite not being familiar with October ball.
Ooh, that one hurt.

Speaker 1 With two minutes left, Sean Payton had a real hacket job as they fumbled the game away.

Speaker 1 Jets 31, Broncos 21. More like Nathaniel can hack it.

Speaker 1 More like Nathaniel will be jacking it to that game team. Masturbating.
Off to Minnesota. Mista.
Mista. Pfizer was saying his ankle hurts.
Well, guess what?

Speaker 1 Now your back's going to hurt because you just put landscaping duty. Anyone else's ankle hurt?

Speaker 1 Hey, Alexander Billy Madison, you blew it when you dropped a ball that couldn't lead to an easy touchdown. Scuba Steve Spagdula dialed up a sack that sealed the game for the Chiefs.

Speaker 1 The Chiefs, 27, the Vikings, 20.

Speaker 3 Max Memes Jake wrote this.

Speaker 1 Standing on a corner, Jameis Winston down in Nola, such a fine sight to see.

Speaker 1 Foster Moreau scored in Foxborough. And yes, he's cancer-free.
The pats haven't won

Speaker 1 yet with the lighthouse at chill

Speaker 1 and this was Belichick's worst loss yet Saints go marching

Speaker 1 Saints go marching 34 Patriots zero

Speaker 1 and that was what's up guys it's big cat here making my Irish entrance with proper number 12 Irish whiskey how do you make an Irish entrance you ask it starts with a shot of proper number 12 Irish whiskey because real friends don't let friends Irish exit a party without a story to tell.

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Speaker 3 Anything else just wouldn't be proper.

Speaker 1 Okay, week five in the books. Thank you to Jake, memes, and Max for writing the boomers this week.
I said at the beginning, but we're doing surviving bar stool this week, so we're in NYC,

Speaker 1 and we're filming a bunch of content, so it was hard to get everything done today, but so they chipped in. Great job, boys.
Thank you. Great job.
We appreciate it. Great job.
Great job.

Speaker 1 Memes, great job.

Speaker 3 I could tell which one was written by which person.

Speaker 1 Yes, it's nice. People should,

Speaker 1 you can submit your answer sheet tomorrow via Twitter, X, or Instagram, or Snapchat, or wherever you want to do it.

Speaker 1 So week five in the books, and because we have been doing all this stuff, we're taping a little bit later. We're taping in the fourth quarter of the 49ers Cowboys game.
And guess what? We know what...

Speaker 1 who the winner is, so we can start with the Sunday night game, and then we'll go back to the London game and go forward from there. But the Cowboys

Speaker 1 got their asses kicked.

Speaker 3 This is a measuring stick game, and the measuring stick is directly up their ass, which is in the process of being kicked. It's a painful game for the Cowboys and for their fans.

Speaker 3 The 49ers, congratulations to the 49ers. They won the week five Super Bowl.
If the Super Bowl were played today, I say that the 49ers would win easily. I'd agree with that.

Speaker 1 Now, we get a lot of things wrong on this podcast, but credit to us because two things that we got right.

Speaker 1 One, the fact that last week the Niners won a game handily against the Cardinals with one combined catch between Debo Samuel and George Kittle.

Speaker 1 And we're like, hey, imagine when they get these guys going, that's how good the Niners are. Well, George Kittle then had three touchdown catches tonight and looked awesome.

Speaker 1 And number two, Brock Purdy is 100% a top 10 quarterback. If you disagree, you aren't watching the games.

Speaker 3 Brock Purdy is just good.

Speaker 1 He's just very good.

Speaker 3 It's time for everybody to accept it. We did our list last week.

Speaker 3 He might even be top seven quarterback now.

Speaker 1 He absolutely could be. Guess what? He's better than Dak Prescott.
Yep. Yeah.
And the Niners are really fucking good, and they just kicked the shit out of the Cowboys.

Speaker 1 But my other question, PFT, are we sure the Cowboys are good?

Speaker 3 No, because again, this was a measuring stick game. Jerry Jones said they lost to the Cardinals.
Yeah. And they just got their ass kicked.

Speaker 3 Like, this is as big an ass whooping as I can remember in a while for the Cowboys in primetime.

Speaker 1 And more than that, their wins, so they're going to be 3-2 after this game. Their wins are the Jets week two.

Speaker 1 That was the first week that Zach Wilson had to come back as a starter because of Aaron Rodgers. They killed him.
And then they won week one against the Giants and last week against the Patriots.

Speaker 1 The Giants and the Patriots might be two of the worst four teams in the NFL.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 who have the Cowboys beaten?

Speaker 1 No one.

Speaker 3 This is where we're going to find out how good the AI Jerry Jones is because the real Jerry Jones would be down on the sideline right now. He loves to do that.

Speaker 3 Pace the sideline a little bit, stand directly behind your head coach and just stare at him. Yes.
Just let him feel you staring at him for a while.

Speaker 3 I can't wait for Jerry Jones interviews that he does where he talks about just whatever random thought pops into his head.

Speaker 3 I think it's like 105, that radio station in Dallas that he always goes on and completely throws the messaging of the team that they've, that like McCarthy is trying to put out there, throws that out the window, and then talks about like circumcising Mosquito.

Speaker 3 Yep. I can't wait to hear what he says about Mike McCarthy this week.

Speaker 1 He just starts ranting. He like calls in and it starts regularly, and then he just starts, he stays on for a little bit too long, and he makes a million headlines and puts everyone on the hot seat.

Speaker 1 And Mike McCarthy, so next week they play Monday night football against the Chargers. That's a game they should win if they're supposed to be one of the best teams in the NFC, which I don't know.

Speaker 1 I think this was, and we'll get to all the other games, but I feel like today was a day that we found out there are three really, really good teams in the NFC, and then there's everyone else.

Speaker 3 Yeah, so I would expect that Jerry Jones would do the vote of confidence this week. It feels like it's vote of confidence time.
Like, Mike's our coach. He's our guy.

Speaker 3 We're confident that he's going to be able to turn everything around. McCarthy's going to have to smash a watermelon before Monday night.

Speaker 3 He's going to have to pull out some stops because whatever they did at halftime tonight did not work at all.

Speaker 1 And by the way, I'm obviously, when I say that there's three really, really good teams in the NFC, I'm referring to the Philadelphia Eagles, the San Francisco 49ers, and the Detroit Lions.

Speaker 1 Those are the three teams right now that I would put above everyone else.

Speaker 3 Don't forget the Bears, big cat. Yes, the Bears.

Speaker 3 In the last two weeks, Justin Fields has thrown eight touchdowns. Eight touchdowns.

Speaker 1 I had a stat.

Speaker 1 I'll save it for later because we don't have to say the Bears didn't play today. It was nice watching football today and not having to stress about that.

Speaker 3 It is actually kind of cool not having your team play on Sunday. It's the best.

Speaker 1 Yeah. It's the best.

Speaker 1 Especially if you win on Thursday.

Speaker 3 Yeah, it's like free play all weekend. Weekends really look a whole lot brighter if your team has already gotten their win out of the way.

Speaker 1 Can I say something, too, about weekends?

Speaker 1 They're not as fun as they used to be, obviously, for me, but I think the best time of the week is like 3 o'clock on Thursday because that's the moment that you have all the football ahead of you.

Speaker 1 Yeah. And that feeling, like 3 o'clock on Thursday is right when I've processed everything.
I have opinions on things. I have some picks in.

Speaker 1 That is the moment that I cherished where I just sit back and I'm like, oh.

Speaker 1 All the football is in front of me.

Speaker 3 I disagree. I think 1.45 p.m.
on Friday is the best time of the week. But I love Thursday night football.
It's almost a weekend. Still a weekday, though, Hank.

Speaker 3 But it's at the point of view.

Speaker 1 Oh, Dak Jones. Oh, Dak's another pick.

Speaker 3 Okay, now I have to get a tweet. I just tweeted.

Speaker 3 I tweeted Dak Wilson. Now I have to tweet Dak Jones.
Yeah. Just really making the rounds on this one here.
There we go. Fired it off.

Speaker 3 Yeah, 1.45 is the best on a Friday because you might be a little still hungover or tired from Thursday night football that you just stayed up watching, and you're done with your lunch.

Speaker 3 You feel a little bit better, and you're not expected to do any work whatsoever. And so that is the start of the weekend, in my opinion.

Speaker 1 What was that shaking of your head? Don't shake your head. Jim Calhoun, don't shake your fucking head.

Speaker 5 I'm just watching this replay.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so, Hank, we're going to get to your other team, but your Cowboys are down bad.

Speaker 5 Yeah, they're horrible. Dak Jones is not good.

Speaker 5 Mandarush just got hurt. That's not good.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 1 It's not good. I'm going to get a loss for words on your Cowboys.

Speaker 1 Did you bet on them tonight?

Speaker 5 I bet on them big. Oh, no.

Speaker 1 Against your boys.

Speaker 3 Against our boys, the Niners? Shut up.

Speaker 5 When you guys do this shit big.

Speaker 1 Oh, Kittle will probably hear this.

Speaker 3 I bet on Kittle to score a touchdown.

Speaker 1 I love Kittle. I feel good about that.
You don't.

Speaker 1 Every chance you have to bet against Kittle, you do. False.

Speaker 3 Two for two in the last two.

Speaker 5 Yeah, no Mo for two.

Speaker 5 So stop doing it. Do you welcome? It's for.

Speaker 1 No, it's not.

Speaker 5 This team might make it to the divisional round of the playoffs, and they're going to get smoked if they make it anywhere past that. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 5 And you can't feel any differently.

Speaker 1 Well, they're going to have to go on the road to start. I mean, obviously, we're still just in week five, but the Eagles look like the Eagles of they've rounded back into the Eagles of last year.

Speaker 1 And the Cowboys, again,

Speaker 1 the Giants and the Patriots and the Jets are their three wins.

Speaker 1 That's.

Speaker 5 Three of the worst teams in the league.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 The Jets might not be in the worst teams of the league category anymore, I don't think. I don't know if they are.

Speaker 3 They're tough. They're tough.

Speaker 1 They're tough. But the Giants and the Patriots are absolutely in the bottom four.

Speaker 3 We were talking about how the Niners haven't played anybody. And now that win against the the Steelers, where they just smoked the Steelers on the road week one, 30 to 7, that's looking a lot better.

Speaker 1 Well, the Niners,

Speaker 1 maybe the Cowboys are so bad, the Niners still haven't played anybody. Yeah, they haven't.

Speaker 3 So let's see. They got next week the Browns, then the Vikings,

Speaker 1 then the Bengals.

Speaker 3 The Niners aren't going to play anybody this year.

Speaker 1 When you're that good,

Speaker 3 they play the Eagles December 3rd. Okay.

Speaker 1 But the Niners are in the category where it's just keep everyone healthy because their team is so fucking good. And Brock Purdy,

Speaker 1 I might even say he's elite. He's got to win a Super Bowl to be elite.
But it's

Speaker 1 anyone who doesn't think Brock Purdy is a top 10 quarterback, top 7 quarterback,

Speaker 1 you're not watching the game, bro.

Speaker 3 Here's what I'll say. Brock Purdy is a franchise quarterback.

Speaker 3 He might not be technically elite just yet. I look forward to having an entire offseason talking about whether or not Brock Purdy is elite if they win the Super Bowl.
That's going to be awesome to do.

Speaker 3 But he's definitely good enough to win. Now, what we have to start doing is next time a quarterback gets a contract extension, we have to be like, Brock Purdy's up next.

Speaker 3 Imagine what Brock Purdy's going to make. You have to start thinking about his money now.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 I guess we can.

Speaker 1 The Cowboys, I don't want to totally overreact, but I feel like the Cowboys are at a weird crossroad in not only their season, but their franchise in terms of Dak and just what, like,

Speaker 1 they have the defense, and they've just got torched tonight by Kyle Shanahan. Torched.

Speaker 1 By the way, did you see last thing on Brock Purdy? So they did a story about Brock Purdy having a roommate. He still has a roommate.
That's cool.

Speaker 1 I know that he doesn't make a lot of money. He makes $870,000 a year.
That's not like nothing. Yeah, but in San Francisco, in San Francisco, it's tough.

Speaker 3 Santa Clara.

Speaker 1 Still, he doesn't need a roommate. Yeah.

Speaker 5 He definitely doesn't need a room. If you're young, it's fun to have a roommate.

Speaker 1 Yeah, true. Maybe someone take care of the house.
But

Speaker 1 he doesn't need, it's not like he needs a roommate because he can't afford an apartment.

Speaker 5 Yeah, but I think if you're under 26, like it's it's fun.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 3 I have a question for you, big cat.

Speaker 5 How would you not want to live with one of the boys?

Speaker 3 That's true. It is fun.
Sure.

Speaker 1 Once you have a girlfriend? Yeah. Once you get a girlfriend, then the boy

Speaker 1 obviously then your girlfriend's your boys. There's usually a little period, too, where it's like you start dating a girl and then like your boy's like, wait, is she's been sleeping over a lot.

Speaker 1 Does that mean we're not going to play Xbox till 3 a.m.?

Speaker 3 That would suck to be one of Brock Purdy's boys right now and then he gets a girlfriend and you've got the sweetest life ever.

Speaker 3 Your roommates with the starting quarterback of the 49ers, but you can read the writing on the wall. It's like, oh, no, he's growing up.
He's going to move out. You have to sabotage that relationship.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 you get the worst of it because he's not super rich yet. Yeah.
You've got to make sure Brock Purdy doesn't get a girlfriend until he gets a contract.

Speaker 1 You got to get at least one year in the mega mansion, driving sick cars. You know,

Speaker 1 you can't let him get a girlfriend in the next year and a half. Oh, they're engaged.
Oh,

Speaker 1 he has a fiancé and a roommate.

Speaker 1 That makes no sense. I think

Speaker 1 that makes no sense.

Speaker 3 It might just be her. She might be the roommate.

Speaker 1 All right, I'm going to find this roommate shit.

Speaker 3 I have a question for you, Big Cat. Yeah.
Is Brock Purdy him?

Speaker 3 Yeah, he might be. I think he's him.

Speaker 1 Yeah. It is Brock Ober.

Speaker 3 You don't think he's him?

Speaker 5 He's a good quarterback, playing a good system. He's him.

Speaker 1 Okay, Brock Purdy. October 5th.
Brock Purdy should be

Speaker 3 in the MVP conversation right now.

Speaker 1 Brock Purdy still.

Speaker 5 Is liberal the correct use of that word, so that's a liberal use of him.

Speaker 1 Of him?

Speaker 3 You can use him on anything. Like Cool Ranch Doritos are him.

Speaker 3 It doesn't have to be an individual. But that's like saying Lays are him.

Speaker 1 You're saying Laser himself. Laser not.
Laser not original?

Speaker 1 Correct. Not him.
Pringles are him. Original Pringles, yes.
Yeah, Pringles are him.

Speaker 1 All right. Fuck out of here.
Mark Purdy still has a roommate that he splits rent with and drives a Toyota Sequoia.

Speaker 1 He and I are still splitting rent. I still drive my Toyota Sequoia.
Other than that, it's pretty simple. So wait,

Speaker 1 so he's got a fiancé, too?

Speaker 3 July 3rd. Here's to forever.
Oh, it might be a situation where he's not allowed to live with her until they get married.

Speaker 1 So this roommate really is missing out on it.

Speaker 3 Yeah, he's getting boned.

Speaker 1 Dude,

Speaker 1 you got to get alimony.

Speaker 1 You got child support. You got to get friend support.

Speaker 3 Which ironic is, I don't think Purdy believes in boning your roommate. I think that's part of the reason why he's getting engaged.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Let's get to the rest of the games. London game.
Jaguars, 25. Bills, 20.
The Jaguars are back.

Speaker 1 I want to give all the credit to the Jaguars for

Speaker 1 playing very well, punching the Bills in the mouth.

Speaker 1 Their defense stood up, and Trevor Lawrence looked good. I love the fact that the Jags are starting to run Trevor Lawrence more.
It's like every time he runs, I'm like, damn, he's fast.

Speaker 3 Yeah, you forget that watching him play because he looks so good from the pocket, but when he starts to move, you can tell he's a young quarterback.

Speaker 1 Right. And Travis Etienne was phenomenal.
188 total yards, two touchdowns. He also played against himself in fantasy football today.
So that sucks. He tweeted that after the game.
That's tough.

Speaker 1 Brutal.

Speaker 3 You think he sent himself a DM afterwards being like, yo, fuck you. What the fuck, man? Yeah.

Speaker 3 He should trade for himself.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he should treat for himself. And Trevor Lawrence was eight for nine for 89 yards and a touchdown on third down.
Very good game from the Jaguars.

Speaker 1 Jaguars feel like they have righted the ship from their loss against the Texans.

Speaker 1 Pete Prisco might be back onto the scheduled Jaguars.

Speaker 1 But.

Speaker 3 This was probably one of the games that he had circled as maybe a loss.

Speaker 1 He might have had it as a loss.

Speaker 3 He got one back.

Speaker 1 They got one back because he had the Texans as a win. With all that said, and again, Jaguars deserve to win this game.

Speaker 1 The Bills' schedule to go to London, which we talked about on Friday, made no sense.

Speaker 3 No sense at all.

Speaker 1 And they showed the part. Like, they actually looked like they were sleepwalking in the first half.

Speaker 1 Josh Allen said on Friday that he felt sleepy. Stephon Diggs called him sleepyhead.

Speaker 3 Of course you feel sleepy. Like, they flew overnight Thursday night.

Speaker 3 They get to London on Friday morning, stay up all day through the day, and then try to get reacclimated at night. There's no chance that worked out for them.

Speaker 1 It was a very dumb decision. They started the game with four straight punts, 11 penalties in the game.

Speaker 1 Again, it's the Jags deserve all the credit for winning the game because they played great and they held off the Bills.

Speaker 1 And they also, like, the Bills made a little rally in the second half when they woke up, and the Jags did a very good job of, like, you know, long drives when they needed it, using Travis Etienne.

Speaker 1 But yeah, the Bills. The Bills basically threw this game away with how they traveled.

Speaker 3 So like we talked about on Friday, what should happen is the the moment you get a chance, like maybe that Monday, maybe that Monday morning, you put your guys in medically induced coma, knock them out, put them on to London time, get their body naturally acclimated, fly them over while they're all knocked out, and then you get there, you practice through the week, you use a copious amount of drugs to put them asleep at night and wake them up in the morning.

Speaker 3 And then you have to do the exact same when you're coming back. So, I think they play Sunday night, right?

Speaker 1 So, they should sell giants.

Speaker 3 Yeah, yes. So,

Speaker 1 they've got a mini-buy.

Speaker 3 They play Sunday night.

Speaker 1 Against a terrible giant.

Speaker 3 Yeah, so that's going to be good for them. But you've got to do the same when you're coming back now.

Speaker 3 Like, do you think that McDermott's going to keep his guys over there until Thursday night and then fly them back?

Speaker 3 No, it makes sense to get them over there as early as possible in the week and not have them be sleepy head.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and then Matt Milano getting hurt is bad.

Speaker 3 That's very bad. They blamed it on the turf.

Speaker 1 Ah, shit.

Speaker 3 They said Tottenham Stadium was like playing on concrete.

Speaker 1 Oh.

Speaker 3 So I don't know where we're at because we're a grass podcast. We believe in grass.

Speaker 1 Yeah, which we were there before the Swifties were there.

Speaker 3 We were there, yeah.

Speaker 1 Swifties.

Speaker 3 I mean, you can join our movement if you can, but you're joining our movement, not us joining yours. Remember that.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 But yeah, the Bills now have Tredavious White out for the year. Matt Milano looks like it might be out for the year.
Von Miller did come back,

Speaker 1 but this feels like it's getting to a point where the Bills are just going to have to score 30 every game because their defense was playing great, but he is very important to everything they do. Yeah.

Speaker 3 Jake, did you see the wild stat that happened today? The wild play?

Speaker 3 No, for real.

Speaker 3 Josh Allen sacked Josh Allen. Didn't it come back?

Speaker 3 Yeah, there was a penalty, but he still sacked him. Still cool.
Sacked Josh Allen, and they were both drafted seventh overall, and their names are both Josh Allen. So I have my...

Speaker 3 Josh Allen has Josh Allen's number.

Speaker 3 My official Josh Allen power rankings are still number one, Josh Allen, and then two is Josh Allen.

Speaker 3 So it's this Josh Allen, Josh Allen, the one that we're friends with, is one, and then Josh Allen, the pass rusher, is second. But head-to-head, Josh Allen has Josh Allen's number.

Speaker 1 All right. That's like that.
Hard to argue that. Yeah.
Hard to argue that. Hank, you got to be pumped.
Bills take a loss for the AFCE standing. Shut up.
What?

Speaker 1 Not mathematically eliminated. I mean, that was huge.
You always want to see... You want to see the teams in front of you lose.

Speaker 5 No, I love Josh. I love our friends.

Speaker 5 Bills Mafia is great. I never root against our friends, so that was disappointing to see.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 1 I was trying to cheer you up. No.
That was big.

Speaker 1 Nope.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 3 We also had an all-time Jaguars fan over in London today. The guy rocking the bow tie with the giant lapels.

Speaker 1 Oh, I thought you were talking about the guy also dressed as an actual cat. No, he was.
Oh, yeah, that was.

Speaker 3 He was dressed as a cat and wearing a huge.

Speaker 1 I wouldn't say the bow ties were the thing I remember.

Speaker 3 Well, he was the Jaguar. He was dressed as a Jaguar, wearing this big-ass suit, and he gave himself a captain's logo on it.
So he voted himself to be team captain. He looked awesome.

Speaker 1 Yes, he did. He did.

Speaker 1 The London game is the best. I think we have another London game coming up.
I think next week.

Speaker 3 Germany. Germany.
No, I think we have London, maybe another one next week. I think we're

Speaker 1 in London, yeah.

Speaker 3 The Ravens play next week, and then we've got the Colts and the Patriots in Germany.

Speaker 1 Oh, that'll be fun.

Speaker 5 And the Chiefs and Dolphins soon.

Speaker 3 Yeah, next week's Tottenham again.

Speaker 1 Okay. Tottenham again.
Bad turf. Lunder.

Speaker 1 Next up. Did the Lender hit? 2-0.

Speaker 1 Steelers 17, Ravens, 10. The most Steelers-Ravens game I think I've ever watched.
The fact that this game was 10-5 at one point was so perfect, then 10-8.

Speaker 1 But it was so perfectly Steelers-Ravens because, as we said on Friday, in this game, you always take the underdog. And for the first half, first three quarters,

Speaker 1 it looked like the Steelers were the worst team offensively ever. And

Speaker 1 they started the game punt, punt, punt, field goal, punt, punt, punt. And then they blocked a punt for a safety, and it woke up.

Speaker 1 the whole team, and they end up winning this game with Jalen Warren making big plays, George Pickens making big plays, but just so perfectly Ravens Steelers that you walked away being like, the Ravens had a million ways to win that game, and they should have put them away, and they didn't, because that's just how this game goes.

Speaker 3 Yeah, it was an awesome game. And even when the Ravens and the Steelers play shitty games, it's actually better.

Speaker 3 It's so cool to watch these two teams just like beat the fuck out of each other for a while. And the Ravens' wide receivers stunk today.
I was going to say, they had six drops today.

Speaker 3 They've got the worst hands. Like, ironically, JPP does not have the worst hands on that team because they had drops all across the board, and it was ugly.
Lamar was throwing some good passes early.

Speaker 1 Yeah, like Lamar, if you look at his stats, you're like, oh, he had a bad game. No, he put them in a position to win.

Speaker 1 If Aguilar makes that catch down the sideline, Bateman makes that catch in the end zone. I think Mark Andrews might have also had a drop.

Speaker 3 Mark Andrews dropped a touchdown.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Lamar Jackson played fine up until he didn't.

Speaker 1 If his wide receivers could catch catch the ball, the Ravens are up three touchdowns going into the fourth quarter.

Speaker 3 Yeah,

Speaker 3 it was a tough loss for the Ravens. But yeah, credit to the Steelers and their defense.
TJ Watt just takes over a game sometimes.

Speaker 1 It's 14 sacks against the Ravens all time.

Speaker 3 He just flips a switch, and he's just always around the ball. Had a fumble recovery, had a big sack.
He was just playing with his hair on fire at the end of the game.

Speaker 3 And yeah, one thing I can say about the Steelers offense, Jalen Warren should get Najee Harris' touches.

Speaker 1 He's so good.

Speaker 3 So much better than Najee Harris's. And Najee still has that shine that goes with him a little bit of being a high draft pick.
And so you want to keep trying to feed him the ball.

Speaker 3 But anybody with eyes can see Jalen Warren carry the ball and be like, this guy has 10 times the burst Najee has.

Speaker 1 That was when the game flipped, when they blocked the punt, and then Jalen Warren had a 23-yard catch and

Speaker 1 it was like a 10-yard run, 15-yard run, back-to-back.

Speaker 3 He jumped over, dude, and then did a spin move right after he landed.

Speaker 1 He completely reinvigorated their offense. I don't know how you can't get George Pickens the ball more.
He got it a good amount amount today. He had a big, big day, but he's elite.
Like,

Speaker 1 he makes incredible catches.

Speaker 1 He is hard to bring down.

Speaker 1 They were saying Fire Canada in the middle of the first half, which I understand because they did look really bad. But the Steelers, all of a sudden, three and two,

Speaker 1 and they've already won.

Speaker 1 They won two.

Speaker 5 They beat the Browns.

Speaker 1 They beat the Browns and the Ravens. So they already have two division wins.
I don't know. Steelers, like, this is just Tomlin.
If they're favored, bet against them. If they're underdogs, bet on them.

Speaker 5 Ravens can't catch either.

Speaker 1 So, yeah, we were saying, like, Lamar Jackson wasn't. If you look at the stat sheet, you're like, ooh, Lamar Jackson kind of struggled because he had a couple interceptions.

Speaker 1 The interception in the end zone was a bad interception. Yes.
That was a bad thrown ball that Joey Porter Jr. picked off.

Speaker 1 And that game

Speaker 1 could have been over right there.

Speaker 5 They also dropped the easiest touchdown in the end. Ever.

Speaker 1 Ever. Yeah.

Speaker 3 Ever. They had two bad.
I think they dropped two touchdowns. Yeah.
And

Speaker 3 we talked about it on Friday, but Roquan Smith, still not a Raven. Still not.
Because he hasn't beaten the Steelers yet, not officially a Raven. But yeah,

Speaker 3 the pick by Joey Porter Jr. in the end zone, after he picks it off, he turns to, I think that was, was that Odell Beckham that he got it from? I think it was.

Speaker 3 He turned to him and said, go be a family man. Kind of punked him.
He did the verbal too small tonight. Go be with your family.

Speaker 1 Yeah. That's tough.

Speaker 1 Okay. Yeah, just a perfect Steelers-Ravens game through and through.
Next up, Colts, 23, Titans, 16.

Speaker 1 And Richardson got hurt again.

Speaker 3 Yeah, it's tough.

Speaker 1 Gardner Minshew is the best backup in the league.

Speaker 3 Okay, so I disagree. Okay.
Because I thought about this too. Is he the best backup? Tyler Huntley made the Pro Bowl last year.

Speaker 1 He did, but that was also, what, three, four people?

Speaker 3 It was like five people that dropped it.

Speaker 1 Five people dropped back.

Speaker 3 Yeah, yeah. Gardner Minshew is actually probably the best backup quarterback in the NFL.
Well, Jameis Winston, too.

Speaker 1 Jameis Winston, too. But Gardner Minshew has now had to come in, what, three times this year?

Speaker 1 And the Colts are three and two.

Speaker 1 I actually think Shane Steichen, coach of the year, early week five,

Speaker 1 probably have to give it to Kyle Shanahan.

Speaker 3 Yeah, Kyle Shanahan. Or, I mean, McDaniel, his offense has more yards than any offense ever in the history of football through five games.
Yes, that's true. That is a fact.

Speaker 3 But Steichen's in the conversation. We're having the conversation right now.

Speaker 1 He is definitely in the conversation because I did not expect anything from the Colts this year. He's got him 3-2.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 the degree of difficulty of having your starting quarterback, who you have a set game plan for, being knocked out of three games, that's pretty crazy.

Speaker 1 So the Colts, and Jonathan Taylor was back, even though Zach Moss was the one who got all the yards.

Speaker 1 But

Speaker 1 yeah, the Colts, like that drive,

Speaker 1 we're watching the game. The Titans have...

Speaker 1 Fourth and one on the five. They handed off to Derrick Henry, which couldn't get the short yards.

Speaker 3 Stopped.

Speaker 1 There's eight minutes left in the game. Bernard Minshew then went on a seven-minute drive, field goal, but it gave the Titans the ball back with a minute left and no timeouts.

Speaker 1 It was like that was the game right there.

Speaker 1 He just methodically worked them down the field, ate all of the fourth quarter clock, and the Colts are now 3-2.

Speaker 3 Crazy. And the Titans, they don't give up big numbers in terms of the rushing game to their opponents, but they got gashed today.
Yeah, they did. They got gash today.

Speaker 1 They sponsored that big one.

Speaker 3 So

Speaker 3 it was 1,051 days since the Colts have beaten the Titans. Reset the clock.

Speaker 1 They're back on.

Speaker 3 They're back on. They're 1-0 in their last one.
The Colts' offensive line looks awesome, and they have Jonathan Taylor back. So they worked out that deal.

Speaker 3 I think both teams won.

Speaker 3 I think the Colts won, and I think Jonathan Taylor's team won.

Speaker 3 The Colts won because they get a great running back to return to the team. And Jonathan Taylor got way more money than he thought he was going to get, and he doesn't have to get traded somewhere else.

Speaker 1 But But the whale died.

Speaker 3 Yeah, the whale is lost.

Speaker 1 You can absolutely point to the moment that Jonathan Taylor, the holdout and everything started. Jim Ursay might have taken his eye off the whale.

Speaker 1 So Jonathan Taylor might have killed a whale in this, but he did get paid and he deserved to get paid.

Speaker 3 I did the math on it, and with his guaranteed money that he's going to be making, Jim Ursay could have saved 11 to 12 orcas and flown them across the country.

Speaker 3 So, Jonathan Taylor, I hope you're happy with yourself.

Speaker 3 I hope you can sleep at night knowing that there are 12 beautiful creatures that are probably going to die in captivity because you had your owner pay you a livable wage.

Speaker 1 Jim Merce definitely feels like one of those guys who kind of like an owner being like, we have to make this right for Jonathan Taylor to show people that we're a good place to play. Yeah.
You know?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 It was pretty quick that he came back and like, yep, here's the new deal. Yeah, I think so.

Speaker 3 There was a lot of rhetoric. Like people were saying he's never going to play in Indy again.
He just wanted a new deal. He wanted a new contract.
And guess what? Holdouts work sometimes. Yeah.

Speaker 3 Like your teammates might be a little bit pissed at you. Your fans are going to be a little bit pissed at you for a little bit.
But if you do what's right for yourself,

Speaker 3 it's probably going to work out in the long term. Yes.
Yes.

Speaker 3 Also, Sabre Metrics, did you know, Big Cat,

Speaker 3 that per Jim Ursa, the Colts are 10-0

Speaker 3 when the roof is open

Speaker 3 and the window is closed. Oh.
So that combination of the roof being open, window being closed, they're undefeated at home when they do that.

Speaker 1 It's elite.

Speaker 3 It's cheating.

Speaker 3 They're going to ban this. It's going to be the brotherly shove and then Jim Ursay's roof hijack.

Speaker 1 I saw the tweet saying the roof was going to be open. Good for Jim Ursa.
He finally got it open. Yeah.
And the Colts, yeah, they might be the surprise team.

Speaker 1 I might put a future on Shane Steichen to win Coach of the Year. I don't know.
He gets my vote, and we do have votes.

Speaker 3 I have a stat here about the Titans' offense. They're averaging 7.2 non-kicker points per game.

Speaker 1 Ooh. Not good.
Not good. Not good.
Although DeAndre Hopkins was making some big catches. He was.
So that was good. And Derrick Henry threw a touchdown again.

Speaker 1 Did that count? Oh, it didn't count?

Speaker 3 I don't think it counted.

Speaker 1 Well, I saw him throw a touchdown, and then we had to do something.

Speaker 3 I think maybe it was just barely out of bounds when he caught it. I saw that, too.
And I thought to myself, yeah, Derrick Henry continues to be an elite quarterback. Yeah, it was.
It did not count.

Speaker 3 So DeAndre Hopkins has...

Speaker 3 He's had a 100-yard receiving game with 11 different quarterbacks in his 11 seasons.

Speaker 1 That's insane.

Speaker 3 Isn't that nuts? That's insane. So Ryan Tannehill, he got him 100 yards today, and they finally realized, like, Hopkins is still pretty fucking good.
Let's get him the ball, and he can still play.

Speaker 3 So, yeah, just the Titans' offense stinks when they're on the road.

Speaker 1 I also like the Titans' jerseys today.

Speaker 1 I might just do this update every single Sunday because they do have maybe the highest variance outside of the Chargers of like jerseys that look cool to me, and then Jersey, like, what the fuck are they wearing?

Speaker 3 Yeah, they've got some that just look like a 2001 Sega Dreamcasket.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and just slow. But today, they look good,

Speaker 1 speedy.

Speaker 1 Okay. Next up, Lions 42, Panthers 24.

Speaker 1 Lions are one of my top three teams in the NFC. I said this before this game.
I judge, I'm like the old BCS computer. I judge, obviously, big wins, road wins, important.
The Lions wanted Arrowhead.

Speaker 1 They wanted Lambo. They've proven that they're good.

Speaker 1 I judge beating the bad teams by a lot just as highly as beating the good teams on the road because I think there is something to be said about the NFL where if you can just not have those sleepwalk moments not have those day those games where you just kind of roll out the helmets and hope you win and have these fluky games that counts for me and they kicked the shit out of the Panthers and it was defense it was Jared it was like Hutchinson making plays David Montgomery just bullyballing everyone.

Speaker 1 The Lions are fucking really good.

Speaker 1 If they didn't have a Monroe or Jameer Gibbs.

Speaker 3 I feel like Hutchinson has a shitload of interceptions for his career.

Speaker 1 Four interceptions. He was two against Justin Fields last year.

Speaker 3 Yeah, four interceptions in his career. He's always making plays in the backfield, just shoving people over.
He's so strong. Yeah.
So strong. I agree with you.

Speaker 3 I think this was a take-care business game.

Speaker 3 I predicted 45 points for the Lions. They got 42.
Pretty close. It was a take-care business moment.
The Lions are actually a contending team.

Speaker 1 Yes. No, they're really good.
I really do mean it.

Speaker 1 When you can just absolutely no doubt pace the bad teams, I pay a lot of attention to those wins as well.

Speaker 1 Because I do think there's something about that that just shows that you are consistently a way better because it's the NFL.

Speaker 1 Like every team, the gap between the worst and best team is smaller than every other league.

Speaker 1 So any given Sunday can happen, but being able to get up there and be like, hey, yeah, we know this Panthers team hasn't won a game. Let's not take them lightly.
Let's beat the fuck out of them.

Speaker 1 And they beat the fuck out of them. Want to play a fun game? Yep.
It's called When Are the Panthers Going to Win Their First Game? Okay, go.

Speaker 3 All right. Give me the schedule.

Speaker 1 At Dolphins. Loss.
At home against the Texans. Ooh.
Loss. At home against the Colts.

Speaker 3 They might win that one. Okay.
They might win that one. I'm going to put them maybe.

Speaker 1 I'm going to say tie. Okay.
At the Bears. Thursday night football.

Speaker 3 You guys are pretty good on Thursday nights. Hot.

Speaker 1 We're hot. The Bears are.

Speaker 3 Wilson Fields is Mr. Thursday night.

Speaker 1 The Bears are going to be at that point somewhere around five and five.

Speaker 1 So they're going to want to beat the Panthers to keep that one number one pick.

Speaker 3 Yeah, because you would rather have them have the number one pick than use your own number one pick. Yeah.

Speaker 1 All right, win. All right.

Speaker 1 Bears.

Speaker 1 Cowboys at home.

Speaker 1 That actually

Speaker 3 could be a win. We've seen how the Cowboys play against bad teams on the road.
Yep.

Speaker 1 At the Titans.

Speaker 3 At the Titans, loss.

Speaker 1 At the Bucs.

Speaker 3 It's a lot of

Speaker 1 Bits are good. Loss.
At the Saints, in the dome. Loss.
At home against the Falcons.

Speaker 3 They might win that one. I think they might win that one, yeah.

Speaker 1 And then they finish off at home against the Packers, at the Jaguars, at home against the Sox.

Speaker 3 Loss. Yeah,

Speaker 3 that's what it's going to be.

Speaker 3 They're going to beat the Falcons at home.

Speaker 1 Cease Smith's going to owe us some hats.

Speaker 3 They're going to beat the Falcons at home. Yeah.

Speaker 1 But the Panthers are.

Speaker 1 They're not good. No,

Speaker 3 this was also a game where expectations were so high for the Lions that Eminem was in the house. And if you you can play it to your maximum at an Eminem game, you're doing something right.

Speaker 3 Like, it could have been a lot closer if, like, Dan Campbell before the game said that he was afraid. He was worried that they weren't going to be focused.
And

Speaker 3 the Lions actually,

Speaker 3 they did take that step into becoming a very, very good team. They're almost a great team.
Lions are almost a great team.

Speaker 1 I think so, too.

Speaker 3 If you look objectively at their roster right now, they're one of the best rosters in the NFL.

Speaker 1 And they were very injured today.

Speaker 3 And they were very injured, and they're well coached. Their offense looks incredible.
They were running that trick play with like the two flea flickers. Find Sam Laporta for a touchdown.

Speaker 1 Sam Lord was the Iowa touchdown play. Sam Laporta.
The 149ers ran as well.

Speaker 3 Yeah, Laporta has as many career touchdowns as Kyle Pitts does. Isn't that fascinating? Ooh.

Speaker 1 Yeah. It is fascinating.
It is. Yeah.

Speaker 3 It's fascinating. It is fascinating.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so

Speaker 3 congrats to the Detroit Lions. Now, if you're a Panthers fan, we talked about it a little bit last week.
Doubt is starting to creep in. And by doubt, I mean in your quarterback Bryce,

Speaker 3 he gets hit in the head a lot. I've noticed that about Bryce.
I think it's because of his height. He's like at elbow level.
So he takes a lot of shots to the head, which isn't good.

Speaker 3 And they don't call it. And I think they're just like, oh, he's short.

Speaker 3 So people naturally, they don't have anything that they can go down low and hit because that's basically his head that you're aiming at. But there's probably some doubt for Panthers fans.

Speaker 3 Like, did you make the right pick?

Speaker 3 Do you know why they picked Bryce Young? Like, what solidified them on Bryce Young being the guy? No. They went out to dinner and always the dinner.
It's the dinner.

Speaker 3 It's always the dinner and Bryce Young ordered scallops and a salad at dinner.

Speaker 3 That's a red flag.

Speaker 3 That should have been a big red flag.

Speaker 3 CJ Stroud gets the 72-ounce bone-in ribeye.

Speaker 1 That's it with his hands.

Speaker 3 He doesn't even eat it.

Speaker 1 I still think Bryce Young is going to be good, but it's not good right now. I don't know.

Speaker 1 Long-term approach.

Speaker 3 I want him to be good, and he seems like a really nice guy and a guy that you want to root for.

Speaker 1 I just watched him so much in college and I'm like, he can't be that bad and he's playing on a bad team. So I'm just going to keep holding out hope.

Speaker 3 Yeah, he doesn't have great pocket awareness. He'll try to run away from guys, but he won't run as fast as he can.
And then he gets caught from behind by him a lot. He threw three touchdowns today.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Two interceptions, but two touchdowns. Yeah,

Speaker 3 he threw like a one-yard interception.

Speaker 1 Listen, if you're not throwing interceptions, then you're not trying.

Speaker 3 That's true.

Speaker 1 You have to be taking risks. But yeah, it's not good for the Panthers right now, which I love, but it's not good.
It's objectively not good.

Speaker 1 Okay, let's take a break. Then we got a game we got to talk about.

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Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Oh, we have breaking moves.

Speaker 1 Tay Smith, his reaction to the Cowboys game.

Speaker 1 I was making this video after it was proven

Speaker 1 that I was right when I said that Prescott was going to throw two interceptions. And guess what? Before I had a chance to finish the video, damn it, before I had a chance to finish the video,

Speaker 1 he was three.

Speaker 1 Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 3 I like his turtleneck.

Speaker 1 Yeah, his turtleneck's great.

Speaker 1 He

Speaker 1 acts sucks so bad that he threw his third interception in the middle making of that video. How about it? How about it? All right.

Speaker 3 Next game. I love how when he does those videos, he's very clearly just begging for Skip Bayless to watch it.
Yes. Like, Skip,

Speaker 3 you know you have to watch it.

Speaker 1 Subtweet. It's a subtweet.

Speaker 1 Saints 34

Speaker 1 Patriots 0.

Speaker 3 Is that right, Big Cat?

Speaker 3 Are you reading last week's score? Because I know that they lost by like mid-30s.

Speaker 1 No, they scored three points last week last week. 38-3.
Okay. This is Saints 34

Speaker 1 Patriots 0.

Speaker 3 In Foxborough.

Speaker 1 In Foxborough. PFT, PFT, I have a stat for you.
Okay.

Speaker 1 Bill Belichick has coached 499 games. He's the greatest coach of all time.
He's going to maybe pass Don Shula.

Speaker 1 The worst two losses he's taken have been the last two weeks. The six worst losses he's taken have all come since 2020.
Wow. That's pretty bad.
Wow. That's really bad.

Speaker 3 I have some stats for you too, big cat.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 3 So career pick sixes at Gillette Stadium. Mac Jones has four.
Okay. Tom Brady has four.

Speaker 1 Oh, no.

Speaker 3 For his entire career.

Speaker 3 Also, the Patriots are 0-3 with the fake Lighthouse.

Speaker 1 Oh, no. Snake brought it up.
I have some more stats.

Speaker 1 Mac Jones in his last two games, both of them being benched.

Speaker 1 He has four interceptions, two pick sixes.

Speaker 1 A fumble return for a touchdown, 260 yards total. Total.
Total. Not just one game.
This is two games and zero touchdowns.

Speaker 1 Henry, is this rock bottom?

Speaker 5 Yeah.

Speaker 1 This is rock bottom.

Speaker 3 Rock bottom was last week.

Speaker 5 No, this is rock bottom.

Speaker 1 I think you said last week, like, you can't get worse than this.

Speaker 5 We didn't lose as bad as we did last week. We did not score.
We haven't scored in 10 quarters.

Speaker 5 It's rock bottom. I now understand what it is.
You had three points. Like you guys,

Speaker 5 the Bears are always really, really bad.

Speaker 1 Oh, the Bears won this week. Right.

Speaker 5 So that means that the team they beat is really, really bad.

Speaker 3 Okay, very good.

Speaker 5 So we're just like the really, really, really, really bad podcast. Thank God for

Speaker 5 Jake and Max because our teams suck. The Patriots suck.
It's depressing.

Speaker 5 I have a depressing stat, too. I thought you guys were going to say it for me.

Speaker 1 Oh, I have one more, too. Mac Jones has played five games this year.
He has five touchdowns. Justin Fields, in the last two games, has eight touchdowns.

Speaker 5 Since 2000, the Patriots have now lost more home games without Tom Brady starting at QB 25 than they did with

Speaker 1 Brady starting at QB 2. That's insane.
That's nuts. That is insane.

Speaker 3 Is that true? Yeah. Here's another fun stat for you, Hank.
This is the first time ever that Belichick has been shut out at home with a starting quarterback.

Speaker 5 Yeah, I mean, ever. It's bad.
They got to move on from Mac.

Speaker 1 I got a good stat for you.

Speaker 5 Because the Mac.

Speaker 5 Because

Speaker 5 the Mac Jones camp is starting to do sources and

Speaker 5 experts, and it's like...

Speaker 1 I saw that.

Speaker 5 Even Patriots, some Patriots fans are getting mad at me saying I'm a fake fan, and they're like, oh, he has no weapons. He has no weapons.
Brady never had weapons.

Speaker 5 He had Randy Moss, and they had Jules and Gronk and stuff. But there was a lot of years.
These were three really good players.

Speaker 1 No, I know.

Speaker 5 I understand. I understand.

Speaker 5 He had weapons. But there was a lot of years that he didn't.
And when he didn't, they still won the division. They still made it work.
That is fair. He was never saying, I have no weapons.

Speaker 5 So,

Speaker 5 and again,

Speaker 5 you might have no weapons, but zero points. Like, you have to be able to score if you're a quarterback.

Speaker 1 Here's some good news, Hank. The last quarterback to throw back-to-back pick sixes

Speaker 1 was Matthew Stafford in 2021 when the Rams won the Super Bowl.

Speaker 3 There you go. Soupy.
You think it's Soupy?

Speaker 1 Soupy?

Speaker 5 Back-to-back pick sixes?

Speaker 1 It might have been back-to-back games. Stad Hole sent me this.
Back-to-back Back-to-back games.

Speaker 5 Figured out Stad Hole.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
I like this. Dumpy Hank.
Listen, Hank.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Mac Jones got to go. He's bad.

Speaker 5 Yeah, he's bad. He's got bad attitude's not great.

Speaker 5 I hate the Mac Jones camp saying this. I hate that.

Speaker 1 It's ridiculous because Mac Jones is bad.

Speaker 1 He's bad. Yeah.

Speaker 5 Their defense is...

Speaker 5 Their defense is so banged up, it's like, what can you be mad about the defense not playing that well?

Speaker 1 Two plays that were really, really bad that suck out was Devontae Parker, like, actually looked like he was trying to get his foot out of bounds on that one catch.

Speaker 1 Do you remember watching that when he was like, he actually stepped, he made a step that looked like he was intentionally trying to get his second foot out of bounds? And then the Mac Jones

Speaker 1 pitch that was a fumble was,

Speaker 3 that was bad.

Speaker 1 You're rock bottom. Do you think that the Lighthouse, do you think if they tear down the Lighthouse?

Speaker 3 So, Bighead, it's funny that you brought up the Lighthouse. Hank, it's funny that you brought up the Lighthouse.
I didn't. You always do.
Well, you said it was Rock Pop. I've got another stat for you.

Speaker 3 So the Patriots today were 0 for 1 on field goals. That's why they were shut out today for the first time.
I don't know if you heard the stat earlier.

Speaker 3 First time they've been shut out with a starting quarterback in Belichick's career. They were 0 for 1 on field goals.

Speaker 3 They said this on the Patriots broadcast that Belichick has told them that they need to adjust to the new win conditions in the stadium that is directly affected by the new lighthouse.

Speaker 1 Wow.

Speaker 3 New Lighthouse took three points off the board for you today. That's just a fact.

Speaker 1 What are you going to do about this?

Speaker 5 The lighthouse is all we got.

Speaker 5 That's really the only, like, I think you rebuild around the lighthouse. Yeah.

Speaker 1 That is the foundation.

Speaker 5 Get rid of Belichick, get rid of Mac Jones, and just build around the Lighthouse.

Speaker 1 Build an entire team around the Lighthouse.

Speaker 5 But it's tough. The 0-3 thing is tough.
I've really been on the front lines.

Speaker 5 I was hoping that we we were going to get some magic and kind of use it as a rallying point and turn the season around, and I could be like, this is all the White House.

Speaker 5 But it's really blowing up my face.

Speaker 5 People are going up there sending videos, and it's tough to see the river.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 3 Yeah, tough is one way to put it.

Speaker 5 You guys got agents going out in the field planting fake reports. Here's good news.

Speaker 1 You play the Raiders next week. There you go.

Speaker 5 Loss.

Speaker 3 No, McDaniel,

Speaker 3 he owes that to Belichick. He owes him a one.
Two and four?

Speaker 1 You think maybe you're back?

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 Oh.

Speaker 3 There is a good website you can check out, fakelighthouse.com, done by A.W.L. Wayne Jr.
Check that out if you're interested in learning more about it.

Speaker 3 Just peruse it, Hank.

Speaker 1 Wayne Jr. Yeah.

Speaker 5 That's your son?

Speaker 3 Tables? No,

Speaker 3 it's not me.

Speaker 3 So, Hank, you're so grumpy, Hank.

Speaker 1 As Rock Bottom. June, Wayne Jr., who the fuck?

Speaker 5 What kind of fucking name is that?

Speaker 1 I don't know. I mean, some people out there probably listen to it.

Speaker 5 Is his last name Jr.?

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 5 No one's last name name is Junior.

Speaker 3 Hank, you misspelled the name of the person that did your entire presentation for you.

Speaker 5 I do. I did the presentation.

Speaker 1 Hank, walk me through rock bottom or you just like.

Speaker 1 That charge has to go.

Speaker 5 I watched the first half, and then I was like, I don't want to watch a fucking second of the rest of this game.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 3 Do you think

Speaker 1 what's the deal with Belichick?

Speaker 5 I think Belichick, whatever he wants to do.

Speaker 1 I mean, I agree with you. I'm just wondering because this is his two words.

Speaker 5 I wouldn't be surprised if he is like, I need to get the fuck out of here. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 3 I've got a couple of theories, Hank. A couple of theories about Bill Belichick.

Speaker 1 Be good fan fiction.

Speaker 3 No, just hear me out. Hear me out here.

Speaker 3 So Belichick, we all know that he sends his assistants around the country to get hired and then destroy the franchises that they go to and make the AFC easier for him.

Speaker 3 There's documented history behind that. I think he's ruining the Patriots because he's going to go somewhere else and then he'll make the Patriots easier to beat when he's at the next location.

Speaker 3 So, where would that be?

Speaker 1 Good question.

Speaker 3 A couple ideas. It's a very good question, big cat.

Speaker 1 Probably not going in the division.

Speaker 3 Probably not in the division, but

Speaker 5 he would want to be in the eastern division.

Speaker 3 Well, since you brought it up, he could go down to the commanders who will be looking for a new head coach at the end of the season. An owner that's looking to spend a lot of money.

Speaker 3 Annapolis, Maryland, is 30 minutes away from Landover, Maryland. He could coach Navy.
He could coach Navy lacrosse and the Washington Commanders at the same time. That's probably unlikely.

Speaker 1 But that wouldn't be playing the Patriots.

Speaker 3 That might, yeah, so that might be fan fiction on my part.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 3 However, what about a coach swap? What about a coach trade?

Speaker 3 Vrabel to the Patriots, Belichick to the Titans. Because I actually looked this up, Hank.

Speaker 3 And first, I was thinking about this, like Hopkins. Hopkins going to Tennessee.
That was kind of a weird decision on his part.

Speaker 1 Okay, this is getting weird.

Speaker 3 Belichick's always wanted to coach Hopkins. He's been very, very open about that.
He's right about that.

Speaker 3 Now, also, I found some quotes from Bill Belichick about the city of nashville in the past this is what he has to say about nashville it's a great town a great atmosphere i have a place in franklin oh we know the area pretty well we're getting to know it even better oh we just love this weir is no longer weird we just love the people and we love the atmosphere down there who's we when they when you keep saying we who's we well it's steve yeah probably his family his family um it's a great area we love

Speaker 3 children these are good these are good people it's a great area we love the people down there. Vanderbilt is where my dad coached.
Nashville is where I was born.

Speaker 1 Whoa.

Speaker 3 Has a bit of, certainly a lot of good vibes and sentiments from Nashville and the Tennessee area. That's what Belichick has to say.
It's coming home. It's coming home.
Just think about it.

Speaker 3 You would like

Speaker 3 to say that.

Speaker 1 I like Graveyard. You would want Grave, right?

Speaker 5 Yeah, Barcelona Nashville bars would be fun. It'd be a good time.
I would want Grave Roll. I thought you were going to go with a

Speaker 5 coach swap for the Raiders. Get Brady and Pilich back together.

Speaker 3 That'd be interesting, too.

Speaker 3 I mean, he clearly has a lot of connections with the city of Nashville.

Speaker 1 For sure.

Speaker 1 We should briefly talk about the Saints. Their defense was phenomenal today.

Speaker 1 The Patriots had eight first downs. They had one first down in the second half.

Speaker 1 I mean, this is how the Saints have to do it. Their defense has to be awesome.
Although Derek Carr looked a little bit better than he did last week. But that was a whooping.

Speaker 3 Yeah, it was just an ass-kicking.

Speaker 1 So, Hank, Hank, are you just

Speaker 1 thinking draft? Are we looking at the draft board? Because

Speaker 5 who are you going to draft? I watched the Celtics preseason game today. Oh, wow.
I don't think I've ever watched a preseason game in my life.

Speaker 1 Congratulations on Peyton Pritchard getting an extension.

Speaker 5 Drew Holiday looked great. Porzingis looked great.

Speaker 1 Jalen Brown had his shorts on backwards.

Speaker 5 Peyton Britchard's back.

Speaker 3 You put him on with his left hand.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Did you see he had him on backwards?

Speaker 5 That's swag.

Speaker 3 Like crisscross.

Speaker 5 Yeah, I see. I don't like seeing this.

Speaker 1 I don't like seeing this down. Season's over.

Speaker 5 It's October again. Like, I am happy I have you guys to kind of like walk me through this.

Speaker 1 I guess that's where you're like, well, we just love football so much, so we just watch football every day. Which is good.

Speaker 3 Me and Big Cat are like in the darkness. We're like, come join us.
Yeah. We're so happy to have you.

Speaker 1 Give you the map.

Speaker 5 I just don't like, again, and I'm going to catch heat from you guys and from the fans of this podcast. I get it.
I understand I'm spoiled, but like,

Speaker 5 I just don't love football like that. I like the Patriots.

Speaker 1 It's not. It's fair.
There's a lot of people like that.

Speaker 5 It's not.

Speaker 5 Juice just doesn't hit the same. And maybe it's because I'm having a really bad gambling season, too, but it's like

Speaker 5 remember the Titans, zero fun, sir. Are you all

Speaker 5 zero fun, sir?

Speaker 1 You ready to press the eject button on this 2023 football season? Yeah. Okay.

Speaker 5 Just put me. Yeah.
Put me in.

Speaker 1 Put me to sleep.

Speaker 3 Wake me up in the summer. I think it's just a fact, and I don't mean this in a negative way, Hank.

Speaker 1 Wake me up for an eighth.

Speaker 3 You are spoiled by the Patriots. That's just a fact.
Like, you grew up in an environment where they were winning Super Bowls.

Speaker 3 Anybody would be spoiled by that, where the expectation is you're going to win the Super Bowl every season. I'm sure that was awesome for you to deal with.

Speaker 3 But now that it's no longer the reality, I think it's totally normal for you to be like, yo, the NFL isn't really that cool anymore. I get it.

Speaker 1 You didn't learn to love all the other games. Yeah.
I love all the games. I cherish every game.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Also, probably has to do with you not gambling well this year.

Speaker 1 I would say if you were gambling well, you would not feel this way.

Speaker 5 No, for sure.

Speaker 1 But I've just been so what about a turnaround? What about next week? Raiders,

Speaker 1 whose line is that anyway?

Speaker 5 Start betting favorites at Raiders.

Speaker 3 At Raiders.

Speaker 1 I guess it might not be out because the Raiders are playing Monday Night Football. Ooh, short week.
Yeah, there you go.

Speaker 5 I don't care. I do not care.

Speaker 5 Even if they win. They were trying to get it out of you, and it's hard because

Speaker 3 Hank, think about this.

Speaker 5 If you go to Vegas and you beat the Raiders, but also like how many fucking times are going to show the stupid. They're playing in Vegas again?

Speaker 1 Yeah. Why?

Speaker 1 Oh. What happened last time?

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 1 How is that legal? What happened? To play in Vegas two years in a row? Yeah.

Speaker 1 It's actually illegal.

Speaker 1 Yeah. It's illegal.

Speaker 5 I don't remember. They're going to show that play a million times.

Speaker 5 I have the line, by the way.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 3 I'm going to say Raiders by two and a half.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 1 Nailed it. Let's go.
You're supposed to let all of us guess.

Speaker 3 Yeah. Well, I nailed it.
Yeah. Raiders by two and a half.

Speaker 1 I was going to say Raiders nailed it by two and a half. Nailed it.
All right.

Speaker 1 Okay, Okay, Hank. Well,

Speaker 1 sorry?

Speaker 1 No, you're not.

Speaker 1 I'm not. Billy Zappy? Why don't you put in Malik Cunningham?

Speaker 5 I'm down.

Speaker 5 Who's that guy we signing? Let go.

Speaker 1 The Louisville kid. That was him, right? No.
Yeah, that's Malik Cunningham. Oh, yeah.
He got hurt.

Speaker 7 Oh, he got hurt?

Speaker 3 He got excited about him, and then 10 minutes later, he got hurt.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Mac Jones just is.

Speaker 1 It's just.

Speaker 1 It's gone bad for him. Really bad.

Speaker 1 He's touched people's penises. He's touching people's penises.
Oh, you admit it now.

Speaker 5 Yeah,

Speaker 1 who cares?

Speaker 1 Build around the lighthouse.

Speaker 3 What was worse, defending the lighthouse for so long or defending?

Speaker 5 I will defend the lighthouse. Like I said,

Speaker 5 let's just forget about what's going on in the field and just focus on the lighthouse.

Speaker 1 Build around the lighthouse.

Speaker 5 Get this thing fucking legalized.

Speaker 1 Enough people in the lighthouse. You get enough money to get the cap.
You start paying people under the table.

Speaker 5 Let's get it illegalized. Get a plaque made.
Stick it to PFT. Throw some Coast Guard members up there.
We can send Sergeant Bobo up there.

Speaker 3 His name's Commander Kroll, and he's

Speaker 3 a decorated,

Speaker 3 illustrious career. What you need to do is you need to expand the DePonset River.

Speaker 1 If you expanded the Deponset waterways, then I would look much differently at this lake. You've got to be like a beaver.

Speaker 5 If I ever had the chance to talk to Mr. Kraft, I would suggest maybe just like doubling the size of the lighthouse.

Speaker 3 The lighthouse might not be big enough. Yeah.

Speaker 5 So you can see it from the ocean.

Speaker 5 Yeah. Fucking end this debate once and for all.
Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 All right. Next up, Falcons 21, Texans 19.
Desmond Ritter,

Speaker 1 300 yards. First time in the NFL.
He's 31-0 at home in college in the NFL.

Speaker 1 Desmond Ritter looked good. He looked competent.
The Falcons defense is also very legit.

Speaker 1 So credit to Desmond Ritter for, like, there was a lot of heat on him. He looked very bad.
He was getting put in the conversation and one of the worst quarterbacks in the NFL.

Speaker 1 And he answered that with playing an exceedingly competent game.

Speaker 3 So it goes back a little further than that. He hasn't lost a home game since his junior year of high school.
Wow. So, yeah, don't bet again.

Speaker 1 And then he didn't bet against a home game in high school. So it's easier to say.
Yeah. 31-0 is crazy.

Speaker 3 Don't bet against Ritter at home is the moral of this story. And everybody that watched this game,

Speaker 3 if you had money on either team, or if you're a Texans fan or a Falcons fan, the NFL owes you money for what happened on the game-winning field goal at the end.

Speaker 3 Young Wakeu steps up, kicks it, the screen cut to black, and then it cut back in and you had to just see what the refs were doing with their hands. That field goal never happened.
Yeah.

Speaker 3 As far as I'm concerned, never happened.

Speaker 1 Oh, it's a false flag. It's bad.

Speaker 3 Also, C.J. Stroud still hasn't thrown an interception.
I have a question about that. Set a record.

Speaker 1 I have a question about that. At what point is that a problem?

Speaker 3 I think it... So

Speaker 3 he has to. It's a problem that he's probably thinking about it all the time.

Speaker 1 Well, not only that, but like, I kind of like my guys throwing interceptions every now and then.

Speaker 3 So what it means is that CJ Stroud is not a gunslinger. Right.
Not a gunslinger.

Speaker 1 Like,

Speaker 1 it's an incredible stat. He's played phenomenal,

Speaker 1 but

Speaker 1 maybe it's the inner cutler in me.

Speaker 1 I'd like him to just throw a ball that, you know, there's no chance it's going to be completed.

Speaker 3 Is CJ Stroud a game manager? Is he a great game manager?

Speaker 1 That conversation will start.

Speaker 1 I think he has to throw one just to get everyone off the scent.

Speaker 3 And a bad one, too.

Speaker 1 Bad one. He has to throw a reckless interception.
Triple coverage.

Speaker 3 Just trying to to do it all in arm strength and it's like woof but he was taking a shot yeah but he did look good today he put together what could have been a game-winning drive

Speaker 3 threw a touchdown with what like a minute left in the game uh to give them the lead so stroud looked good if you're a texans fan you're probably it sucks that you lost this game because you it felt like you had all the momentum in the world and then you lost a winnable game which stinks But I don't think that you're walking away from this game being like, oh, we suck.

Speaker 3 It's just like, okay, you're a young team. You're a growing team.
There's going to be blips. You competed.
You almost won.

Speaker 1 It also was like this game, the Falcons were favored by two. The Falcons won with a walk-off field goal one by two.
These two teams are like mirror image.

Speaker 1 Like, I'm high on both these teams going forward. They have to fix a couple things, but they both play competent football and are well coached and good for the Falcons.
Their defense was good today.

Speaker 3 Competent football. Yeah.
I think that's a good way to describe these.

Speaker 1 These are young teams. Yeah.
Competent football. And also Bijan catching that shovel pass behind his back and then scoring a touchdown was fucking awesome.

Speaker 3 It looked like he almost did like a behind-the-back pass fake while he caught it with one hand and then brought it. Like he traveled.
He traveled on that touchdown.

Speaker 1 It was incredible. And Kyle Pitts, not just doing cardio, seven catches today.
And Kyle Pitts involved.

Speaker 3 Drake London got involved too. Yeah.
So yeah,

Speaker 3 Ritter was spreading it around a little bit.

Speaker 3 And I love how every coach on the Falcons has a mustache. Yeah.
They're mustache football. Yeah.

Speaker 1 They look like they just show up in their choppers. Orange County choppers.
It's great.

Speaker 1 Big Paul yells at Little Paul. Little Paul yells at Big Paul.

Speaker 3 Bike gets made. Yeah, the meme.
That's how it goes. That classic meme where they're throwing shit at each other.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's how every episode goes, and I watched every episode. I love that show.
Give the ball.

Speaker 3 They're just yelling, give the ball to Kyle Pitts. No, give the ball to B.
John Robinson. I said, give the ball to Drake London.

Speaker 1 Okay. I was actually on a flight once with Mike Jr.
Oh, yeah? Very starstruck.

Speaker 3 What was he like?

Speaker 1 He just looked like he wanted to make a chopper. Yeah.
Yeah. I asked for, I said hello to him after, took a picture, got his card.

Speaker 3 That's cool. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Also, really fucked me up when I watched that show for a season and I didn't realize that Orange County was just upstate New York. Yeah.

Speaker 1 That really fucked me up. Wait.

Speaker 1 What? Yeah.

Speaker 3 Shut the fuck up. They're New Yorkers.
Shut up. Is it in Orange County, California?

Speaker 1 No. They're in upstate.

Speaker 3 There's an Orange County, upstate New York? Yeah.

Speaker 5 There's an Orange in New Jersey.

Speaker 1 Syracuse? Orange County, New York.

Speaker 3 There's no way. Orange County Choppers is in Southern California.
Nope.

Speaker 1 It is in, maybe not upstate. I don't know what the upstate is.

Speaker 5 It might be New Jersey.

Speaker 1 No, it's not. It's in New York.

Speaker 1 Actually, Goland is.

Speaker 1 It's like an hour away from.

Speaker 5 Goland is in fucking New York City. It's not even upstate.

Speaker 1 It's not even upstate. It's like an hour away from New York City.

Speaker 3 That is so fucked up. Those guys, they're from Orange County, California.

Speaker 1 They're just north of Yonkers.

Speaker 3 This is stupid.

Speaker 1 I know. They're on the Hudson River.

Speaker 3 That show sucks. Now they're going to be.
Oh,

Speaker 3 that show sucks.

Speaker 1 And you're like, oh, shit, they're Yankee fans. Orange County, Chopper.

Speaker 3 I'm very upset by this.

Speaker 5 Let's see what the actual town is.

Speaker 1 Orange County, New York.

Speaker 1 Newburgh.

Speaker 1 Town of Newburgh.

Speaker 3 Do they purposely give off California vibes?

Speaker 1 No, I don't think they really do give off. Once I figured it out, I think it was I was watching an episode and it looked like cold.
I think it's like, what the fuck?

Speaker 3 I think it's like they don't wear sleeves.

Speaker 1 Yeah, no, they don't wear sleeves.

Speaker 3 So that's why I assume California.

Speaker 1 All right, let's just see. If we wanted to take a trip up there right now,

Speaker 1 it's actually really close. Hour and 16 minutes.

Speaker 3 Yeah, that's not upstate.

Speaker 1 Well, it is for

Speaker 1 New Yorkers always are like

Speaker 1 anything above Yonkers is upstate.

Speaker 3 It's upstate, yeah.

Speaker 1 But yeah, Orange County Choppers.

Speaker 3 Fucked me up. So you shared a flight with him one time.
Yeah, it was cool. It was really cool.
One time I met the guy from Hardcore Pond

Speaker 3 at Guy Fieri's Super Bowl party. I accidentally said I love pawn stars to him.
I also call them Mike.

Speaker 3 It's so embarrassing.

Speaker 1 Why'd I say Mike? It's Paul and Paul Jr.

Speaker 1 The fuck? Damn it.

Speaker 1 What was I thinking, Mike?

Speaker 1 Paul Tuttle.

Speaker 3 Paul and Paul Jr. My mind is just blown from the fact that they're not in California.

Speaker 1 I apologize for calling him Mike. His name is Paul.
I can't believe I fucked that up. I love that show.
I love that show. Orange County Choppers.
We should get a chopper made for us. Yeah.

Speaker 1 If anyone who's listening to the show is Orange County Choppers employee in New York, not California, please hit us up. We'd love to make a pardon my take chopper for the new office.

Speaker 1 How sick would that be? Yeah. We could do a whole episode.

Speaker 3 My life has been shattered.

Speaker 1 Please hit up PMTIntern at barsoolsports.com. Yes, sorry, I had to do that to you.

Speaker 3 That's so weird.

Speaker 1 Also, do you know Repo Wars is not real?

Speaker 3 Shut up. Or Storage Wars.

Speaker 5 Storage Wars?

Speaker 1 Storage Wars is real. I feel like Storage Wars is real.

Speaker 5 No.

Speaker 1 Repo Wars, that one hurt a lot when I found out that one was real.

Speaker 3 Repo Wars is the funniest show on television.

Speaker 1 It is the best.

Speaker 5 I was a Storage Wars fanatic, and that was as betrayed as I've ever felt.

Speaker 1 What?

Speaker 5 When I found out Storage Wars was

Speaker 1 real?

Speaker 5 Repo were like, they go and pre-check all the lockers and shit. Yeah.
Like the people know what's going to happen. Yeah, I didn't want to hear that.

Speaker 1 Yeah, now it's time. So now we've had everyone just break the fourth wall, fifth wall.
Yep.

Speaker 1 Yep.

Speaker 1 And he wears the bone gloves. Yeah.
Love that guy. Yeah.
Fraud. Fucking fraud.

Speaker 1 Okay, next up.

Speaker 1 Dolphins, Giants. Congrats, Jake.

Speaker 1 Paul Tuttle, Senior and Juniors, New York Giants.

Speaker 1 Dolphins 31, Giants, 16.

Speaker 1 The Giants are really bad. The Dolphins actually didn't play their A game.

Speaker 1 20 was not great. But the stat that was ridiculous to me from this game is the Dolphins,

Speaker 1 Devin A.

Speaker 1 Chain, had a 76-yard touchdown run where he had, it was technically the fastest run in the NFL this year, 21.93 miles per hour at his top top speed, only to be broken a quarter later by Tyreek Hill, who had a 69-yard catch for 22.01 miles per hour.

Speaker 1 That's how fucking fast they are. They're just one-upping each other with who can be the fastest guy in the NFL.
So stupid.

Speaker 3 The seven fastest times by a ball carrier in the NFL this year are all Dolphins.

Speaker 1 Yep.

Speaker 3 Tyreek Hill is number one. A-chain is two and three.

Speaker 3 Tyreek Hill is number four. Raheem Mostert is five.
Tyreek again at six. And then A-chain again at seven.
It's crazy. It's crazy.

Speaker 3 And Waddell's not on this list because he hasn't played that much, but he's really fucking fast, too.

Speaker 1 Yeah. It's not fair.
And A-Chain has seven touchdowns in four games.

Speaker 3 It's not fair.

Speaker 1 It's not fair. They are, you said it earlier, but they have the most yards to start a season through five games in NFL history, beating the greatest show on turf with the Rams.

Speaker 3 Mike McDaniels said, mission accomplished, our whole goal this entire offseason was statistical output through five games.

Speaker 1 Here we go.

Speaker 3 So they did. Coach of the year.

Speaker 1 That's funny. That's a funny guy.
He's a funny guy. He's a funny guy.
And the Giants are a train wreck.

Speaker 3 Yeah. So, all right, the Giants' defense today, I know you got beat pretty badly, but you had turnovers.
You picked six.

Speaker 3 You had three turnovers and you had a pick six today, and you still lost 31 to 16. I feel like if you get three turnovers, I don't think, did they turn the ball over?

Speaker 1 I think they might have had a fumble. Maybe not.
I don't know if they did. They might not have.

Speaker 3 Yeah, and you lost 31 to 16. That Dolphins' offense is just crazy.

Speaker 1 And the Giants' offense is just trash. Very bad.
That's really what it comes down to.

Speaker 3 This is actually...

Speaker 1 I think that... Did not have a turnover.

Speaker 3 I think Saquon Barkley has cracked the code for how to make running backs seem more valuable. It's just when you're not playing, your team looks like ass.
Yes.

Speaker 3 And then people are like, oh, yeah, maybe that running back actually is the key to things.

Speaker 1 Another fun fact from this game,

Speaker 1 the Giants had the ball for 11 minutes more, 12 minutes more than the Dolphins. The Dolphins outgained him 524 to 268.

Speaker 3 They scored too quick, big cat.

Speaker 1 The Giants just had the ball doing nothing. Yeah.
They just held the ball doing nothing. I wonder if Dable actually would sit down and be like, hey, one-time possession.
That's the first thing. Yeah.

Speaker 1 We're on the right path.

Speaker 3 Daniel Jones got injured. It doesn't look great for him.

Speaker 1 He got sacked another seven times

Speaker 1 or five times.

Speaker 3 Yeah, so he got hit in the head, and then he said it reminded him a little bit of that injury that he had in 2021 that lingered a little bit.

Speaker 3 The neck injury? He has like neck, head,

Speaker 3 that whole part of your body.

Speaker 1 Good news for them, they're playing the Bills on Sunday night football after the Bills lost. Yeah, it's it's they're in they're in worst team category.

Speaker 1 Like that, this has spiraled because remember, their only win was that insane comeback win against the Cardinals. How much

Speaker 3 to put on Dable? Because you have to have the conversation like as good of a coach Dable was last year, and he was a great coach.

Speaker 3 He might have been the best coach in the NFL last year, considering the roster that he was working with and the turnaround job that he did.

Speaker 3 You had to put some blame on him, right?

Speaker 1 Yeah, I mean, I think it all starts with the party. Yeah.
Reported about.

Speaker 3 Yeah, the six-year-old birthday party. Easy party.

Speaker 1 But yeah, I think their team also, when we do the dude-off, they have no dudes. No dudes.
They have literally no dudes.

Speaker 3 Who would be first?

Speaker 1 It's Saquon. I'm going to Thibodeau.

Speaker 3 Saquon, Thibodeau. Dexter Lawrence.
Yep. He's kind of a dude.

Speaker 1 But that's it. They have no dudes.
They're so lacking in dudes. I guess Waller.

Speaker 3 Yeah, Waller's a dude. Yep.

Speaker 1 They need more dudes. They need to go into the draft being like, we need dudes.

Speaker 3 And then they're going to end up drafting a wide receiver, and their offensive line is still going to suck.

Speaker 1 Do you think that this is like the so last year was obviously fun for Giants fans, but having a year like that where you win a playoff game and you're so excited and then going like all the way back to being bad Giants,

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 1 It feels because you don't get a high draft pick from last year because you made the playoffs.

Speaker 1 That has to hurt just to be like, we're back to square one. You thought you were building something.
Now you're back to square one.

Speaker 3 Yeah, you'd still probably take the season you had last year.

Speaker 3 That was fun. It was.
Getting a playoff win is huge.

Speaker 1 It is.

Speaker 1 You had that whole week. But yeah, the Giants are really fucking bad.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Let's do a worst team's the NFL.

Speaker 3 All right, Panthers.

Speaker 1 Panthers have to be the worst team. Yep.

Speaker 3 The Giants are up there.

Speaker 1 I think the Giants and the Patriots might be the Broncos.

Speaker 3 Yeah, Giants. I would say Giants probably number two.

Speaker 1 I guess the Bears obviously have to be in there. We did win one game.

Speaker 3 We can put the Commanders in there because we just got her ass kicked by the Bears.

Speaker 1 But yeah, this is.

Speaker 1 The Giants are definitely... There's,

Speaker 1 let's see.

Speaker 3 Vikings?

Speaker 1 Vikings might be in there.

Speaker 1 I don't put the Cardinals in there.

Speaker 3 No, the Cardinals fight.

Speaker 1 They're scrappy in every game.

Speaker 3 They fucking fight.

Speaker 1 Yeah. The Giants have, let's see, the worst.

Speaker 3 I would say Raiders are probably in there, too.

Speaker 1 Let's go just off point differential.

Speaker 1 Point differential.

Speaker 1 The Giants are minus 91.

Speaker 1 That is the worst in the NFL.

Speaker 1 Patriots are minus 76.

Speaker 1 Yikes. Ew.

Speaker 1 Yikes. Minus 91 is

Speaker 3 very bad. And it's going to get worse, bro.

Speaker 1 The Bears are minus 42.

Speaker 1 And yeah.

Speaker 1 it's bad. It's bad for the Giants.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Late games. By the way,

Speaker 1 East Coast time sucks. Yeah.
Midnight. Sucks.
And it just,

Speaker 1 it sucks.

Speaker 1 The late games ending at like 7.30 just sucks.

Speaker 1 Eagles, 23. Rams, 14.

Speaker 1 The Eagles are back. Well, they never left.
But I feel like everyone had this game as the, ooh, maybe this will show the Eagles aren't the same Eagles last year. And Jalen Hurts looks phenomenal.

Speaker 1 I feel like he's gotten all the rust off. The tush push is unstoppable.
The brotherly shove, it's so unstoppable.

Speaker 1 With two seconds left in the first half, they did it on the goal line, knowing that it was the last play of the half, knowing that it would work, knowing they would score a touchdown. Max?

Speaker 1 Yeah, it was a good game for the birds. Hurts looked really good.
The pick was bizarre, but

Speaker 1 can't look at one play, played really well. Jalen Carter is so fucking good.

Speaker 3 He's a problem.

Speaker 1 He is so good. Don't look at me with those eyes.
I will say it every week. I know, Wright's really fucking good, too, buddy.

Speaker 3 Okay. You just got buddied, Max.

Speaker 1 No, that's fine. That's fine.
You're going to take that?

Speaker 1 I just want Big Gat to say whatever he says to himself to make him sleep. I told you.
Here's the thing.

Speaker 1 Jalen Carter doesn't bother me because I told you before the pick, before the draft, that if the Bears took Jalen Carter, it would be a disaster.

Speaker 1 The Bears have the worst leadership, locker room, all that shit. It wouldn't have worked.
He's in the perfect spot. Yeah.

Speaker 1 You have to be able to understand that spots matter. I'm happy you passed.

Speaker 3 Could you imagine Jalen Carter during NASCAR weekend in Chicago?

Speaker 1 Crazy. He probably would win.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 3 He is a problem.

Speaker 1 He actually lose.

Speaker 3 He is an issue on that defensive line. He is running through offensive linemen.
They're not even there.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 3 Stirring out of the way at full speed. He's awesome.
And it's not fair that you guys have.

Speaker 1 Try as you might. You can't make me feel bad.
Okay. That's fine.
So Big Cat says it is fine. Fine.

Speaker 1 Stop saying it. I am saying that it's fine.

Speaker 3 So, Big Cat said that you can't stop the brotherly shove, the tush push. The NFL actually might stop it.
Yeah.

Speaker 3 Because Schefter announced this morning that the NFL and the NFL PA were going to look into the injury rate on the brotherly shove, and then they're going to figure out whether or not they should ban the play, which is that's loser shit right there.

Speaker 3 That's loser shit. Listen, I'm saying this as a Commanders fan, as a division rival.

Speaker 3 it's loser shit to ban the brotherly shove because just because you can't stop it doesn't mean that they shouldn't be able to do it because other teams try to do it.

Speaker 3 When the Giants tried to do it on Monday Night Football, it looked like ass and they couldn't do it. Other teams try it and they can't do it.
The Bears actually did a pretty good job with it.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but it also, again,

Speaker 1 if they ban it, the Eagles will still do it and it will still work.

Speaker 1 They will still do Jalen Hurts

Speaker 1 sneaks and they will still work.

Speaker 3 Yeah, they're going to get behind the left side of that line, which weighs way more than the defensive line does, and they're stronger and they're lower, and they know the snap count, and they're going to continue to dominate on it.

Speaker 3 And that's just how it's going to go. But, like, it is bullshit that they're looking into banning it just because defenses haven't figured out a way to stop it yet.
Yes.

Speaker 1 Max,

Speaker 1 I can't remember what I was going to say. It's late.

Speaker 3 The Rams. The Rams didn't play poorly in the second half.

Speaker 1 Yeah, they did. They didn't score.
Yeah, but on defense. Oh, yeah.
But they didn't score on the defense.

Speaker 3 They didn't score. Their defense didn't play that bad, and they were in the game.
Two sides to the game. Yeah, two sides to the game.

Speaker 1 It's complimentary football. Fuck, was I going to ask you, Max? God damn it.
Was it about... Oh,

Speaker 1 what was Jason Kelsey freaking out about? I don't know. I was actually just looking.
I think they're upset about the red zone because our red zone defense is like...

Speaker 1 You mean offense?

Speaker 1 Yeah, red zone offense is like 28th in the league or something. Oh.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 he just said something about it on Twitter, and I was trying to listen to it. That was

Speaker 1 like, there's something about Jason Kelsey because he's is he older than

Speaker 1 Siriani? He might be.

Speaker 3 He looks like he is.

Speaker 1 It felt like a

Speaker 1 dad yelling at a kid even though Nick Siriani is the head coach.

Speaker 3 Because he's got the big beard and the bushy eyebrows. Right.

Speaker 1 Right. It's like it was

Speaker 3 42. Okay.

Speaker 1 He's 35. It looked like a dad yelling at a kid being like, why the fuck did you wake me up? and just screaming at him.
Like, you're supposed to stay in your bed.

Speaker 1 This might not be, this might be a little too uncomfortable. That's personal.
Yeah, it is personal.

Speaker 1 But yeah, you got to figure that out, Max. What's going on?

Speaker 1 Maybe we'll find out. Yeah, that's all right.
Win football games. Okay.
Win football games. The goal is to win football games.
The Eagles are winning football games.

Speaker 1 Do you think the Eagles this year are as good or better than last year?

Speaker 1 Right now, I still think that not as good as last year.

Speaker 1 So they won't get to the Super Bowl? Right now.

Speaker 1 There's 17 games in a season.

Speaker 1 Got to win.

Speaker 1 What's the math?

Speaker 1 Whatever. Math.
You got to win football. You got to win X amount of football games to win a Super Bowl.

Speaker 3 Do you think that? Very true.

Speaker 1 Do you think that the Eagles. That could be any number.

Speaker 3 Yeah, that's what X means, yeah.

Speaker 1 Have they thought about the Eagles?

Speaker 3 Wait, I want to know how many games they have to win, Max.

Speaker 1 Texas. X, X.
The answer is X.

Speaker 3 What does X solve for?

Speaker 1 Do you think

Speaker 1 the Eagles have home field advantage again?

Speaker 1 Do you think they'll consider maybe playing it at the bank?

Speaker 1 That would be electric.

Speaker 1 I think if they played at the bank, that they would win every football game.

Speaker 1 It's the same fans. No, but it's different.

Speaker 1 It's a smaller field. Take pops.

Speaker 1 There's something about that ballpark.

Speaker 3 Would you fuck the bank?

Speaker 1 I also, like, I was looking at it. The Niners schedule is bullshit.
There's no way that we're going to have a better record than that.

Speaker 5 You play nobody.

Speaker 3 I'm looking at your schedule right now.

Speaker 1 You guys play each other. We're going to find out.

Speaker 3 That's it. October 22nd, you play the Dolphins.
That's going to be an awesome game. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Oh, they have the Cowboys, Bills,

Speaker 1 Cowboys, Chiefs, Bills, Niners. Yeah.
That's the stretch. Gauntlet.
Tough stretch. Gauntlet.
Gauntlet.

Speaker 3 Gauntlet. And then the Cowboys again.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.
Although the Cowboys might stink.

Speaker 3 Yeah, they are ass.

Speaker 1 So you think the Niners are cheating because their schedule is so easy? Probably. Dak also fucking sucks.

Speaker 1 That's one thing I wanted to say earlier.

Speaker 3 That's one thing about Max.

Speaker 1 The Niners do have a very easy schedule. Yeah, it's a joke.
But it also is because they're very good.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Like, when you look at one team's schedule, if the Niners don't have to play the Niners, and they also are just better than everyone.

Speaker 3 Yeah, but usually you have to play the first-placed team in every division from last year. They do have to play the Bengals, who are looking better.
They play the Jaguars, who aren't bad.

Speaker 3 They play the first.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah, then they play the Eagles and the Ravens.
It's just the Vikings stink now. Yeah.

Speaker 1 So it changes how you look at it. Okay.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Cooper Cup's back. Yep.
I think they threw to him six times on the first drive. Matthew Stafford was like, I missed you so much.

Speaker 3 They're doing breakfast club again.

Speaker 1 Yeah. And Puka, they can coexist.
Both had big days.

Speaker 1 Okay, next up, Bengals Cardinals. Joe Burrows back.

Speaker 3 Yeah, big time back. Jamar Chase.

Speaker 3 So we all knew going into today that Jamar Chase is always open. He said, I'm always fucking open.
And he is. Turns out he's right.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he tweeted a picture of 7-Eleven after this game. I love that.

Speaker 3 I was thinking Waffle House when he first said it. 7-Eleven is probably better.

Speaker 3 But yeah, Joe was like, I'm going to get the ball to Jamar Chase because he is always fucking open. And Joe was able to move around the pocket.
He looked good. He could run a little bit.
Yeah, he did.

Speaker 1 He looked so much better. He could escape.

Speaker 3 And it's crazy to me to think about this that Joe Burrow has like... played his way through an injury to the point where he's no longer as injured anymore.

Speaker 3 When you think about what you do over the course of an NFL game where you're getting into car accidents every time you get hit, and somehow he's getting healthier as he does that.

Speaker 1 Yeah. And their offensive line played well too.
And yeah, Jamar Chase had a Bengals record, 15 catches, three touchdowns, 192 yards. The Bengals are back.

Speaker 1 This is, maybe this is what the Bengals season is. They're just going to drop a couple and then be like, our season's on the line, must-win.

Speaker 3 Yeah, it was a must-win game. Joe said early in the week, this is must-win, and they won.
And they won. Took care of business.

Speaker 1 Josh Dobbs threw his first pick of the season, and he threw another one.

Speaker 3 Yeah, Josh Dobbs didn't look so great today. Yeah, and

Speaker 1 James Conner got hurt. I think that was also because he just runs angry all the time.

Speaker 3 Yeah, James Conner is, he's the king of having like three touchdowns on 11 carries for 23 yards. Yeah.

Speaker 1 He also, like,

Speaker 1 the Cardinals were weirdly in this game, even though they ended up losing by 14.

Speaker 1 But yeah, I feel like this was the game the Bengals needed because Joe Bro did look night and day better. Night and day better.

Speaker 3 And they fed Joe Mixon, too. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 I think that's kind of, I don't know what else we got from that game.

Speaker 3 I mean, that's

Speaker 1 the 7-Eleven tweet. That was cool.

Speaker 3 Joe Burrow back. A lot.

Speaker 1 Joe Burrow all the way back. All right, let's take a quick break and then we'll get to our last two games.
And then who's back?

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Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 1 Last two games. Jets 31, Broncos 21.
The Nathaniel Hackett revenge game. He was named captain of the game.
He got a game ball after the game.

Speaker 1 CJ Uzama before the game was seen pumping up the team saying their coach made this personal. Well, fuck him and fuck them.
Let's go win this shit for Nathaniel Hackett.

Speaker 1 And I'm happy for Nathaniel Hackett because guess what? Nathaniel Hackett

Speaker 1 coached Zach Wilson and made him look better than Sean Payton coached Russell Wilson and made him look.

Speaker 3 That's just a fact. That's a fact.

Speaker 1 That's just a fact.

Speaker 3 Like, Russell Wilson stunk today.

Speaker 3 Zach Wilson didn't stink as bad as Russell Wilson stunk today. Actually, you know what the big change is? You know, Zach Wilson's not wearing a headband anymore.

Speaker 1 Ooh, that is a big change.

Speaker 3 He says he doesn't wear the headband when it's a little bit cooler because he wears the headband when it's hot because it keeps the sweat out of his eyes. That's what he says.

Speaker 3 So I put together some stats here. He didn't wear the headband last week against Mahomes either.
So

Speaker 3 Zach Wilson with a headband is 389 of 709,

Speaker 3 54.9% completion, 17 touchdowns, 22 interceptions, 69.3 passer rating. Zach Wilson, two games with no headband.
He is 28 of 39. That's a 71.8% completion percentage, 245 yards, or excuse me,

Speaker 3 75% completion percentage, 444 yards, and a 92 passer rating. 92 passer rating compared to 69.2 passer rating.
He's turned the corner. It's the headband, baby.

Speaker 1 The headband. And he did look good.

Speaker 1 He had a Patrick

Speaker 1 Sertan picked him off. He also had a weird end of the first half where he threw the ball

Speaker 1 underneath with like 15 seconds left inbounds, and

Speaker 1 the half just expired. That was pretty bad.
Yeah. But he looked good.

Speaker 1 Zach Wilson is

Speaker 1 not the worst quarterback in the AFC East?

Speaker 3 I don't think he is.

Speaker 1 Who would have thought we'd be here?

Speaker 3 I think, objectively speaking, you can say that Zach Wilson is the third best quarterback in the AFC East.

Speaker 1 Hank?

Speaker 5 It's hard to argue, except for a head-to-head matchup.

Speaker 1 Head-to-head matchup, you are right.

Speaker 3 That was headband Zach, though.

Speaker 1 Big difference.

Speaker 1 Russell Wilson stinks.

Speaker 1 And what we said, he looked okay the first four games, but he had to play a real defense for once. His average depth of target in the first half was 0.6 yards.

Speaker 3 It's pretty bad.

Speaker 1 0.6 yards.

Speaker 3 Kamara. It's like he has Kamara on the backfield with him.

Speaker 1 He had 68 yards on 11 completions with eight minutes left in the fourth quarter. He did put up some yards at the end.
He also had, he fumbles

Speaker 1 maybe the funniest fumbler in the NFL. Yeah.

Speaker 1 His fumbles are like cartoon fumbles.

Speaker 3 Yeah, when he gets caught from behind and he always acts so surprised.

Speaker 1 The ball just goes flying. Yeah.

Speaker 3 And

Speaker 1 they wasted really cool uniforms.

Speaker 3 They did the great helmets. The white helmets looked so good.

Speaker 1 The cap helmets, yeah.

Speaker 3 And then they had the giant D painted on midfield. It looked very, very cool.

Speaker 3 And then after Russ fumbled, the one where he got caught from behind and the ball just like squirts out, goes to the sidelines.

Speaker 3 I think that Sean Payton and Russell Wilson don't have the best relationship. I don't think so either.

Speaker 3 I think that Sean Payton said some bad words to Russ, and Russ is not programmed to receive bad words. Made him short circuit for a second.

Speaker 3 I don't think they're going to get along well for the rest of the year.

Speaker 1 Who has a worse situation right now than the Broncos overall?

Speaker 3 It's pretty bad.

Speaker 1 It's really bad. I don't really know what team is in a worse spot because there was that report, too, that everyone is available for trade.

Speaker 3 Yeah, and then the Jets did the Kevin James meme to Sean Payton after the game. It was Kevin James as Sean Payton coaching for the Broncos.

Speaker 5 I still don't even understand what that means.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I don't really either.

Speaker 3 Just Kevin James. That's the joke.
Get it?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 3 You don't get it? It's Kevin James.

Speaker 1 Don't get it. Get it?

Speaker 1 How do you not get it? It's Kevin James.

Speaker 3 I will never understand the meme.

Speaker 5 I have somewhat understanding, but I feel like a lot of accounts don't. Like, I don't even know if the Jets know what it means.

Speaker 3 Yeah, well, it's like

Speaker 3 Jake's saying, I don't get the Kevin James meme. You can just respond to that with the Kevin James meme.
Right.

Speaker 1 Sure. The Broncos do have their first pick, first-round pick coming up, so I guess they'll just draft a quarterback.
Try to fix everything.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I'm trying to think who in this draft profile matches up with what John Elway likes.

Speaker 1 Drake May.

Speaker 1 Oh,

Speaker 1 Sam Hartman. Sam Hartman, that would be a.

Speaker 3 Sam Hartman would be a John Elway.

Speaker 1 Bad first-round pick with the third pick. That would be a bad pick.
Drake May is 6'4. Okay.
It's taller.

Speaker 3 And he's going to be off the board.

Speaker 1 Well, I mean, this is only.

Speaker 1 I mean, this is only through

Speaker 1 five games. They could lose a lot more games.
It's true. They could really lose a lot more games.

Speaker 3 I could definitely see John Elway reaching like he did with Brock and taking Sam Hartman way too early.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Just being like, well, I watched those Notre Dame games.
Yeah, I don't know. It looks like a quarterback.
I don't know who has it worse right now than the Broncos.

Speaker 3 It's just depressing.

Speaker 1 What team

Speaker 1 is like

Speaker 1 Arizona? You could still sell yourself, okay. Kyler's going to come back eventually.
Carolina has Bryce Young. You hope that works out.
The Bears have two picks.

Speaker 1 Maybe the Vikings, but you have Justin Jefferson. Giants.
Giants. The Giants could be in that conversation.
I mean, the Patriots. I still think the Patriots could be in that conversation.

Speaker 3 The Cardinals might be in that conversation, too, because

Speaker 3 everyone thought they were trying to tank. They're going to play themselves out of having a bad draft pick.
They still are a good draft pick.

Speaker 1 You have Kyler Murray, who, like, yeah.

Speaker 1 Remember, the Cardinals also have Houston's pick, right?

Speaker 3 Oh, that's right. In that trade, yep.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 they have two first-rounders.

Speaker 1 We should do a bleakness draft.

Speaker 1 Who's got the bleakest situation right now? Maybe we'll do it on Wednesday. Bleakest situation.

Speaker 1 Everyone who's a fan of one of these teams,

Speaker 1 you know, make your case of who has the bleakest situation right now. It really has to be with cap space, current roster, and lack of draft picks.

Speaker 3 Bleakest situation. I would say, I mean, the Giants.

Speaker 1 Giants and the Patriots might be answered. The Giants, Patriots, and Broncos might be the answer.

Speaker 3 Giants, Patriots, maybe? Broncos, Raiders. Raiders.

Speaker 1 Raiders are, yeah. Raiders are definitely in there, especially because Josh McDaniel is a dick.

Speaker 5 Rams? They have no picks forever.

Speaker 1 No, they have picks now. The Rams are

Speaker 5 competitive.

Speaker 1 I think they're getting picks back. No, they have their first-round pick this year.
Shit.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Take it back.

Speaker 1 And they have a rookie receiver that's like one of the best in the league. Yeah.
And Matt Staffordshire is really good.

Speaker 5 You took it back, Max. Shut up.

Speaker 3 With the exception of of today, for at least the second half, Matt Stafford is playing really well.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay, we'll do a bleakness draft on Wednesday.

Speaker 1 All right, last game. Chiefs 27, Vikings 20.

Speaker 1 Travis Kelsey got hurt for a second, and the Swifties came to his rescue. They're going to get us grass everywhere.
Well, they have.

Speaker 5 I don't know why it was London, sorry.

Speaker 1 What?

Speaker 1 What?

Speaker 5 I'm not on top of it right now.

Speaker 5 That's okay.

Speaker 1 There was a season. So, you want to eject on the football season?

Speaker 5 London has grass, and they didn't use it.

Speaker 3 Yeah, they did. Tottenham Stadium is grass, right? Oh.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it has to be. Oh, they.

Speaker 1 No, he's right. They have grass.
They didn't use the grass.

Speaker 3 They brought out the field turf.

Speaker 1 They played soccer on grass there.

Speaker 3 So the soccer team.

Speaker 1 They have

Speaker 1 turf that they could put over it.

Speaker 3 The Koys, the Tottenham Coys. Play on grass.
Play on grass, but they brought out field turf and made them play. Because they didn't want the football team to come over and mess up the Koys stadium.

Speaker 3 Okay, got it. There was a Swifty that tweeted.
We're on top of it.

Speaker 1 Fuck it.

Speaker 3 Yeah, there's a Swifty that tweeted, I'm so devastated for Taylor. We know how much Travis makes her happy.
She had to be so.

Speaker 1 Do we know how much?

Speaker 1 We haven't seen it.

Speaker 3 She had to be so worried right now. She finally has a man who shows her love back, and he got hurt on artificial turf.
This is so wrong. We can fix this.

Speaker 1 No more turf. Yes.

Speaker 3 And there's a hashtag Swifty's Against Turf.

Speaker 3 Swifty's no ball.

Speaker 1 Again, Swifties, we have been here.

Speaker 1 You're joining our take now. Happy to align on this particular issue.
So, yeah.

Speaker 1 Let's get grass everywhere. And grass.
Let's figure it out. He could come back in and score a touchdown.

Speaker 3 Let's figure out all the stuff we don't like. Figure out how to make pass interference not reviewable.
Hey. But how to make Sky Judge.
I bet you the Swifties could make Sky Judge happen.

Speaker 1 Swifties, I think you agree with me here. We can find common ground.
Wasn't it bullshit that last week on Sunday there were nine early games and three late games? Yeah.

Speaker 3 Let's fix that. Six, four splits, girl.

Speaker 1 Let's fucking fix that.

Speaker 1 Bullshit. We want to watch all the football evenly spread out.

Speaker 3 The Swifties could actually get the touchback rule changed.

Speaker 1 There also was a rumor that Taylor was going to this game, and then pictures started floating around of random cabinets and stuff in the Vikings stadium. Like, she's in there.
She's in there.

Speaker 1 But yeah, the Chiefs, I don't really know. Like, the Chiefs, I think we're just going to keep doing this with the Chiefs all year.
Like, are they really good? I think they fuck around.

Speaker 1 But yeah, they are really good.

Speaker 3 I think the Chiefs are just awesome.

Speaker 1 Yeah, no, they're really, really good.

Speaker 1 But they also have a way of making teams stick around in games where they leave just enough for people to talk about it on Monday being like, ooh, something wrong with the Chiefs?

Speaker 1 No, they're really good.

Speaker 3 Yeah, they're awesome. They're better than really...
They're definitely a Super Bowl contender for sure.

Speaker 3 Justin Ross had a great catch today. Incredible.

Speaker 3 They're going to unlock him at some point this year. You saw one great catch from him.
He's a massive target. He was great in college until he got injured.

Speaker 3 But Justin Ross could be the next guy up for the Chiefs' wide receiver core. And Travis Kelsey, he's a tough motherfucker.
Yeah. Coming back from that ankle, he's a gamer.

Speaker 3 He got hurt, came back in the second half, and he's a better defensive back than Rob Gronkowski. So

Speaker 3 if you're comparing the two based on, okay, who's a better tight end? They put him back there for the Hail Mary at the end of the game. They didn't score.

Speaker 3 Can't say the same for Gronk when they put him back on the five-yard line against the Dolphins.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 3 Did score.

Speaker 1 It was a covered sack.

Speaker 3 It was a covered sack. Because Kelsey's coverage was so good.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I mean, again, I don't think

Speaker 1 this is Kirk's fault. We've changed our tunes.
The Vikings are just bad.

Speaker 1 And I don't know.

Speaker 1 Could they trade Kirk? No, Zach Wilson's so good now. Yeah.

Speaker 3 They might have missed their window to trade Kirk.

Speaker 1 But

Speaker 3 the clock management was so bad at

Speaker 3 the end of the game for the Vikings. Taking a delay of game, there's no excuse for that.

Speaker 1 We should say, too, the Vikings got screwed. Yes.
The Vikings got absolutely screwed. They called the

Speaker 1 pass interference, then picked up the flag. There was that call.
There was also the cornerback for the Chiefs took off his helmet.

Speaker 3 LeJerry Sneed. Yep.

Speaker 1 And then there was also a hands to the face on that play.

Speaker 1 And they were like, oh, it got tipped. It didn't get tipped.
I don't know what

Speaker 1 the call, why they picked it up, but the Vikings got absolutely screwed on that.

Speaker 3 So La Jerry Sneed, when he was complaining to the ref, and I think it was on the pass interference penalty that they ended up picking up. Yes, it was.
It was the same play.

Speaker 3 Sneed takes his helmet off, and the ref looks at him and goes, put your helmet back on. Yeah.
Tells him to put it back on, otherwise he's going to have to flag him for it. He took his helmet off.

Speaker 3 By the letter of the law, that's a flag, right?

Speaker 1 Absolutely. Am I missing something? No.
It's just probably

Speaker 1 the

Speaker 1 ref was scared of the Swifties. Yeah.

Speaker 3 Listen, I'm not... I'm not blaming the loss on the refs, but you have every right, if you're a Vikings fan, to blame it on the refuge.

Speaker 1 Oh, absolutely.

Speaker 3 This is a perfect situation where you've got three things you can point to and be like, refs fucked us over. Now, if you're a Chiefs fan, you guys played really good today for the most part.

Speaker 3 The Chiefs are good. You'll be fine.
Very good.

Speaker 3 People always say, like, oh, you guys don't respect the Chiefs enough. What else do you want us to say about the Chiefs? You guys have a great team.
Yeah.

Speaker 3 And you have the best quarterback maybe to ever play football.

Speaker 1 The only thing that you don't do is you don't... like totally blow teams out.
So

Speaker 1 like, yeah, but you win games. Yeah.
You're going to probably probably be in the AFC Championship game, if not the Super Bowl, and probably win the Super Bowl.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Patrick Mahomes is that good, he's the best quarterback on the planet Earth.

Speaker 3 And who do the Chiefs play next week?

Speaker 1 I don't know, probably a team they're gonna win.

Speaker 3 I think it's the Broncos. They play the Broncos on Thursday night for the Broncos have never beaten the Kansas City Chiefs ever, basically.

Speaker 1 Well, yeah, Patrick Mahomes has never lost to the Broncos. Yeah, it's actually a fact.
Yeah, that's wait. Where's the game? Arrowhead.
Whose lines it anyway? Chiefs, minus 10?

Speaker 3 Minus 11 and a half.

Speaker 3 Jake? 10 and a half.

Speaker 1 10 and a half. I win that one.
Yep. It's one to one.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Give it up for Chicago.

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Speaker 1 Hank, your overly direct take.

Speaker 5 My overly direct take this week.

Speaker 1 Oh,

Speaker 1 huh.

Speaker 5 Yeah. Travis Kelsey and Taylor Swift.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Go on.
Go on. We're going to break up.
Oh, no.

Speaker 1 Oh, no, Hank. Hank, she just found love, allegedly.

Speaker 5 Allegedly, she's got to go back out on tour. Travis has got some rehabbing to do with the injury, not going to have as much time.

Speaker 5 I think, you know, this is kind of the three-week honeymoon phase is over.

Speaker 5 It always ends up.

Speaker 5 They've kind of realized like, you know, this whole long-distance thing might be an issue.

Speaker 1 He's going to get some good bed rest this week, though. Yeah, Hank, let me make sure I got this right.

Speaker 1 You're wishing for a breakup between Travis Kelsey and

Speaker 3 it's not.

Speaker 5 Your DirecTV wish. That's not what it's called, right? It's just your overly direct TV.

Speaker 1 I don't want it to happen.

Speaker 5 I don't want it to happen.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Sounds like you're rooting for it.

Speaker 5 No, I'm not. It's just a take.

Speaker 3 Do you not want Taylor to be happy?

Speaker 5 I want Travis to be happy. He said, Travis said, which was a little bit conceited, I think, after the Super Bowl, he was like,

Speaker 5 I got a lot of attention after the Super Bowl. It was awesome, but this is even better.

Speaker 3 Why is that killing?

Speaker 5 Talking about the intention.

Speaker 5 Not about how good he was feeling after the Super Bowl and how much better he's feeling now that he's dating Taylor Swift. He was just talking about how happy he is about the attention he's getting.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 5 They probably asked. Podcast is popping off.
He's dating a pop star. But it's about attention.
It's not about love.

Speaker 5 That was how I took that. As a die-hard Swifty,

Speaker 5 I just think, you know.

Speaker 3 Did you get more attention after the Patriots won their most recent Super Bowl or when you started dating Beyonce?

Speaker 3 Beyonce. That's a little conceited of you to say that.

Speaker 1 It's conceited.

Speaker 5 I wouldn't say I love Travis. Oh, nice.

Speaker 1 Whatever. I like Travis.
I don't know. You You don't like Taylor?

Speaker 1 I love Taylor. Oh, okay.

Speaker 3 But you want them to break up. You think they could both do better?

Speaker 5 I don't. I'm not saying I want.

Speaker 5 It's just my take.

Speaker 1 Flip it. I want to tweet this out.
When they Lockwood demands they break up.

Speaker 3 If they do break up, Travis has unlocked an entire new level of person that's going to be seeking him out.

Speaker 5 Correct. Yeah, that's awesome.
Yeah.

Speaker 3 It is pretty cool.

Speaker 1 They're sane.

Speaker 3 But they're never going to break up because they're in love.

Speaker 1 Yeah, PFT, what's your overly direct take?

Speaker 3 My overly direct take, big cat, is I was just looking at a list of quarterbacks this year.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 3 Brock Purdy this year is a top five quarterback in the NFL. I like it.
Top five. I think he's number five in the NFL right now.
Top five.

Speaker 3 That would make him elite adjacent.

Speaker 1 I agree.

Speaker 3 I agree with you. I'd say if he gets to a Super Bowl this year and he continues playing the way that he's playing, which, by the way, he should be in the MVP discussion that we're having right now.

Speaker 3 Yep. So now, boom, he's in the MVP discussion.
So is Christian McCaffrey. If he gets to a Super Bowl, I'm going to say it, Brock Purdy might be elite.

Speaker 1 Wow. Love it.
Love it. All right.
My overly direct take is Monday Night Football. I hate betting on this team, but I think the Packers are going to kick the shit out of the Raiders.
Yeah, Raiders.

Speaker 1 A little mini-bye.

Speaker 1 Lions game. Oh, no.
Yeah, factor that. Coldest, coldest, coldest gambler in the world has spoken.

Speaker 3 What's the spread?

Speaker 1 One and a half, plus one and a half for the Packers.

Speaker 5 I had a huge Vikings, Cowboys, Packers.

Speaker 1 Money line? Parlay. So none of those hit.

Speaker 1 I'm just for the record. Yeah, no, you're right.
That means the Packers will hit. You're due.
Maybe.

Speaker 1 You weren't even close to hitting that. No, shit.
That's what I'm saying.

Speaker 1 Trying to help the people.

Speaker 6 A little bonus nugget.

Speaker 5 I can't help myself.

Speaker 3 A bonus nugget. Packers are 4-0 under Matt LaFleur in the game, heading into the bye, turning the ball over just one time in those four games with a plus-seven turnover differential.

Speaker 5 Did you get that ready for Friday's show, just bonus nugget, or or did you get it ready for today's show?

Speaker 1 No, I do every game, but I only he doesn't talk about

Speaker 3 Sunday games. Come on.

Speaker 5 So you did Friday. So you did it Thursday.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 He's been sitting with that nugget all weekend. Yeah.
Waiting to fucking.

Speaker 3 Sometimes I can slip it in, sometimes I can't. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I like it. So it's on the blog, too, if you guys want to watch.
Read it. Okay, Jake, your overly direct take?

Speaker 3 My overly direct take, brought to you by DirecTV, is that Mac Jones will be benched before Halloween. Oh.
Oh, spooky.

Speaker 1 For Bailey Zappy. Very cool, Jake.

Speaker 3 Just benched.

Speaker 3 For Bailey Zappie.

Speaker 1 Maybe. Yeah.

Speaker 3 But who else would it be? Bring someone in. Aleek.

Speaker 1 Kirk Cousins.

Speaker 3 They should.

Speaker 1 Should get Kirk Cousins. He should.
Should start over with Kirk Cousins.

Speaker 5 Mitch.

Speaker 3 Kirk Cousins in a Giant Lighthouse. Who says no?

Speaker 3 Well, the thing is, they're playing at the Raiders and then the Bills and the Dolphins before Halloween.

Speaker 3 Spoiler season.

Speaker 3 Hank, you actually might play spoiler this year.

Speaker 1 I know. We will.

Speaker 5 At least once. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Hank, I'm trying to find... Oh, look, Hank.
There's some big titties.

Speaker 1 Yeah, there you go.

Speaker 3 Did you look at any today, Hank?

Speaker 5 No, I've been locked into this

Speaker 1 show shit. My for you page is just big titties.

Speaker 3 Mine's just whales. Mine's just dogs.

Speaker 3 Occasionally with like a big titty girl that has a cute dog.

Speaker 5 And back stretching exercises. I did this for four minutes, and now my lower back pain is gone.

Speaker 1 I just get that video. I like that.

Speaker 1 Okay, let's finish up. Who's back of the week?

Speaker 1 Let me ask Hank.

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Speaker 1 Hank,

Speaker 3 who's back of the week?

Speaker 5 Who's back of the week is kissing your bros.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 3 Did Max do something?

Speaker 5 As a matter of fact, PFD, he did.

Speaker 3 Oh, interesting. Are you coughing, big kid?

Speaker 5 I did cough once, though. The Phillies.
You're okay.

Speaker 1 Phillies.

Speaker 3 Are you sick? No. You should get checked out.
Jake is sick.

Speaker 1 I was right. Oh, allergies.

Speaker 3 This thing I need to get tested again.

Speaker 1 You're permanent. You've got perma allergies.
You're a walk allergies. You are just a walking allergy.
You're allergic to life. Yeah.

Speaker 3 Not allergic to you guys, though.

Speaker 1 It's great. I wish.
You wish? I'm just kidding. What? You're allergic to us, Max? Yeah, that's why I'm always sick around you guys.
So you're just always sick. Nah.

Speaker 1 So you were fine this weekend where you were screaming and getting your bros kissing you? Yeah, that rocked.

Speaker 5 Yeah, so the Phillies played the Braves. They won.
Max was going nuts at a bar.

Speaker 5 And then...

Speaker 5 Before his seductive singing of Dancing on My Own,

Speaker 5 he put out a video. Ball game, baby, screaming at the camera, eating the camera.

Speaker 5 I literally thought you were going to take a bite out of the camera, but instead, before that happened, his bro kissed him on the cheek. I love that.

Speaker 1 It was great. I love that for you.

Speaker 1 Max.

Speaker 5 Truly, nothing makes me laugh harder than Max just his face getting sucked. And Max doesn't even blink.

Speaker 1 Max was going. Was that planned?

Speaker 5 That's so hard.

Speaker 1 That's the beauty of it.

Speaker 5 I love Max's bros. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I think... My one buddy told my other buddy to do it, and I had no, but I had no idea that that was going to happen.

Speaker 5 But you didn't even flinch.

Speaker 1 you you in real time do you think like damn I just got well I'm just in the moment like I'm I'm when I'm doing those videos it's like

Speaker 3 I'm feeling everything about that game that nothing else is is affecting what I'm doing in that moment I love it and I love my favorite max emotion is when he's screaming into the camera and he's so excited that he gets angry and so angry that he's gonna cry his like eyes start to like well up a little bit and he gets so mad and unhappy looking but he's the happiest happiest person in the world.

Speaker 3 But you're like, it's like you want to fight your phone because your phone doesn't believe in the fightings enough. I just get so excited.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so excited. It's great.
It's incredible.

Speaker 1 Do you feel bad about bullying Blooper offline? Blooper is a fucking bitch.

Speaker 1 That was truly amazing to see on Saturday. Seeing headlines that read, like,

Speaker 1 Braves mascot gets bullied off of Twitter by Philadelphia fans. Like, he's a mascot.
He's not a person. He, like, takes offense to what people are saying to a mascot.

Speaker 3 Yeah, it's true. I mean, he did, he fired the first shot.
He came out the fanatic.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I mean. Well, so, but a Philly fan said he wishes he died, which is funny.

Speaker 5 But that's Philly. That's, that's, that makes I like.

Speaker 1 Oh, it's hilarious.

Speaker 5 It's, it happens every time with me, too. It's like, I like to come to Philly, but then you know what's coming on the other side.

Speaker 1 Yeah, they don't cry about it. Well, unless, unless.

Speaker 5 Philly fans, can you say one bad thing about Philly? Like, even Tribbing Max a little bit, people just literally go for the juggular.

Speaker 1 Unless you're a dork who wears glasses and you wish Jalen Hurts got hurt, then Max won't do shit. Right.
That's true. I mean, that was.

Speaker 1 It's a bad moment. I mean, he's irrelevant.

Speaker 5 I had millions of views Jalen Hurts talks about in his press conference.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so it seemed somewhat irrelevant.

Speaker 3 It is relevant.

Speaker 5 But how is, yeah, Jalen Hurst talking, like, how many times has he talked about you in his press conference?

Speaker 1 He could have been literally a shame.

Speaker 5 That's the worst part, like thinking about Jalen Hurst watching the video, and like he would have you saw you, and he'd been like, you stood like,

Speaker 5 you went to jail for me. Jalen Hurst could be like, you punched a guy in the face for me.
Yeah.

Speaker 3 Would have been huge. You put it all on the line for Tom.
Yeah. Wish I could say the same about Max.
Nope.

Speaker 1 He didn't even put up a little resistance.

Speaker 1 PFT, who's your who's back?

Speaker 3 My who's back of the week is hockey. Yeah.
The National Hockey League, eh? Starts up this week. On a regard, Tuesday's back, so we should do a season preview for hockey.

Speaker 3 Who do you guys have winning the St. Louis Cup?

Speaker 1 The Ps.

Speaker 3 I've got the A's.

Speaker 1 Was it last year?

Speaker 3 Vegas.

Speaker 1 I've got the back-to-back. I've got the

Speaker 3 Avalanche.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that sounds right. Okay.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I'll go with you on the Avalanche.

Speaker 3 Hank, you got the B's?

Speaker 1 Bees.

Speaker 3 B's, Ps.

Speaker 3 A's, A's. Max, who you got?

Speaker 1 Flyers.

Speaker 5 Max doesn't know what letter that I start with.

Speaker 1 The F's A.

Speaker 1 The P's. And they almost said the F.
Wait, you already said the P's, the Flyers?

Speaker 5 Definitely almost had the P's.

Speaker 3 Max, you should call the Phillies the P's.

Speaker 1 Sure. I mean,

Speaker 1 I'm just so excited for tonight. Yeah.

Speaker 1 My Who's Back of the Week. I know we'll do our college football recap on Wednesday, but we have to at least say my Who's Back is the teams that are always said to be back.

Speaker 1 Texas, Notre Dame, and Miami all lost. And Miami, maybe the worst loss of all time.

Speaker 3 It was so bad.

Speaker 1 The literal worst loss of all time. Mario Cristobal with 35 seconds left, ran the ball instead of kneeing the ball.

Speaker 1 Georgia Tech didn't have any timeouts, fumble, and then Georgia Tech scored a touchdown with two plays down the field. Incomprehensible.

Speaker 3 So I heard a rumor, don't know if this is true, that their running back had 99 yards and Cristobal wanted to get him a 100-yard game. That's why I had him run the ball.
You kneel that fucking.

Speaker 3 I'm not a clock management expert by any means.

Speaker 1 There was literally 35 seconds.

Speaker 3 I do know that when there's 35 seconds left and the other team doesn't have a timeout,

Speaker 3 it's called victory formation for a reason.

Speaker 1 The play clock is 40.

Speaker 3 You take a knee and then you have victory.

Speaker 1 It's pretty easy to figure this one out. The victory formation.

Speaker 3 That's what it does. You win when you do it.
Yeah.

Speaker 3 I feel bad for the players. Yeah, I do too.

Speaker 1 But all the teams that

Speaker 1 the media loves to have back are not back. Not back at all.
They all took a loss.

Speaker 1 Okay, Jake, you're finished us off. Who's back?

Speaker 3 My who's back of the week is playoff Kershaw.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 3 He got rocked in game one of the NLDS against the Diamondbacks. Get shelled?

Speaker 1 He stinks in the playoffs.

Speaker 3 It's crazy. And he's so good, but not October.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 3 Him and Verdlander.

Speaker 3 Is Verlander good this year?

Speaker 1 He's shoving in the 2-1. Okay, all right.

Speaker 3 Yeah, so

Speaker 3 the Orioles are down 2-0. Sorry, big cat.
The Diamondbacks, a lot of road teams winning in the AL and NLDS so far this week.

Speaker 1 I think the Diamondbacks had five runs before Kershaw had an out.

Speaker 1 Jumped all over him.

Speaker 3 It was tough. 11-2 the final.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and it was tough too because it was 9-0, I think. And

Speaker 1 a Dodgers player, it was maybe like the third inning, hit a double, and he did like their celebration to the crowd, like doing his hands. It was like, it's 9-0, dude.

Speaker 3 Oh, the Twins won. Yeah, so they split.
That's pretty cool.

Speaker 3 And then for some reason, the NLDS got... a day off on a non-travel day.
It's usually after two games. It gets weird.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and they also have a day off after the next game.

Speaker 3 Yeah, so I don't know why they did that.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it is weird.

Speaker 1 Max, because Max, you're not... You have Monday and Wednesday, right? Monday, Wednesday.
That's so weird.

Speaker 3 I want to watch today was off twice. Probably TV and NFL.

Speaker 1 The Phills are hot. The bang.
Fired up for tonight. Can't wait for tonight.
The bang. Can't wait for tonight.
Are you a little nervous that I have a future on them?

Speaker 1 It's giving me

Speaker 1 Super Bowl flashbacks for sure. Well,

Speaker 1 the way you're acting after one win is giving me a boom flashback.

Speaker 5 You made a video in the top of the first one was 0-0.

Speaker 1 You are giving me the flashback.

Speaker 1 I thought that ball went over the fence. It actually hit off the fence.

Speaker 1 You partied last night like you won the World Series. It was game one of the NLDS.

Speaker 1 You celebrate victories. We've talked about this on this show.
That is true. You got me there.
And, like, out with your boys. I mean,

Speaker 1 we don't know. I take it back.
I take it back. I take it back.
The only chances you get to get

Speaker 5 inspired bros. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I take it back.

Speaker 1 I rescind it. It's like one in the morning, I rescind.

Speaker 1 You accept the rescind? I accept the rescind. Okay.

Speaker 5 Can you meet up with both your boys tomorrow so we can get a double? Ooh.

Speaker 1 Kiss sandwich. I'd like to see some tongue get involved.
Give me some TNE. No, no, no.

Speaker 1 No, no. Tongue in mouth?

Speaker 3 I'd like to see a light grope

Speaker 1 for your breast. A little TNE.
I'd like to see some TNE.

Speaker 1 Tongue in ear? Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah, sure. Why not? Little TE.
A little Lauren Boebert, maybe? Yeah. O-T-P-H-J.

Speaker 1 Little T.

Speaker 1 Little T on your P?

Speaker 1 I'm done with this. Little tongue on your flyers? I'm done with this.
No? Let's go, Phils. Okay.
What about Eskimo kisses?

Speaker 3 Just rub your noses on each other.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. Butterfly kisses, eyelashes on the cheek.
Let's go, Phil's.

Speaker 1 Said. We should just all go to the game on Thursday.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 I guess. Not like totally opposed.
It would be sick. I mean, we have work.
Right, but

Speaker 1 to see the bank in person? Yeah, I can't.

Speaker 3 Hank, you don't want him to take a vacation?

Speaker 1 No,

Speaker 1 this would be for the show.

Speaker 5 What about the reality show that we're all here for that we have to do on the show? Doesn't that end on Thursday?

Speaker 3 It ends Thursday night. Yeah, Saturday night.

Speaker 5 No.

Speaker 1 Okay. All right, Max, we're not going.

Speaker 1 All right, numbers.

Speaker 1 Three. 18.
Good show. That was diversity.
Memes, you ever gotten this?

Speaker 1 Nope. Is the machine here? 69.
It's gotta be somewhere. 20.

Speaker 3 All right, upstairs.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 3 What did you say, memes?

Speaker 3 Two.

Speaker 1 Hank, check your phone. Billy's favorite number for

Speaker 5 the group. Memes sent me some tips.

Speaker 1 45.

Speaker 3 Love you guys.

Speaker 3 I don't know what I'm about to say. I'd say anyway.

Speaker 3 Today's a mother day to find you shy away.

Speaker 3 I've been coming for your love, okay.

Speaker 3 Your love, okay.

Speaker 3 okay,

Speaker 3 your love, okay.

Speaker 3 Make

Speaker 3 on

Speaker 3 me,

Speaker 3 make

Speaker 3 me

Speaker 3 uncomfortable.

Speaker 3 Needless to say,

Speaker 3 I want to sent it,

Speaker 3 but he stole it way.

Speaker 3 Further than life is okay.

Speaker 3 Stay after me.

Speaker 3 Life's no better to be safe. It's all good.
To be safe, it's all good. To be safe, it's so.

Speaker 3 Take

Speaker 3 on

Speaker 3 me.

Speaker 3 Take

Speaker 3 me

Speaker 3 up.

Speaker 3 I'll be gone

Speaker 3 when I do.

Speaker 3 keep

Speaker 3 cooking

Speaker 3 cookie cookie

Speaker 3 take

Speaker 3 me

Speaker 3 up.

Speaker 3 I'll be

Speaker 3 gone

Speaker 3 when I die, to tell

Speaker 3 Jesus