Raiders QB Brian Hoyer, CFB, MNF Doubleheader, 1 Question With Sam Howell And Jimbo’s

2h 4m

Monday Night Football doubleheader and it’s gotten bad in Cleveland for Deshaun plus the horrible injury to Nick Chubb. Steelers offense stinks and the Panthers/Saints played a boring ass game (00:00:00-00:22:34). College Football talk and is Bama cooked (00:22:34-00:40:21)? Hot Seat/Cool Throne including the new Rays stadium and Lauren Boebert follow up (00:40:21-00:57:34). Brian Hoyer joins the show to talk about his career, what makes a great backup, his chances at starting, winning a SB, Ernie Adams, and tons more (00:57:34-01:42:44). 1 question with a QB Sam Howell (01:42:44-01:51:54) and then we finish with Jimbo’s (01:51:54-02:01:14).


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Runtime: 2h 4m

Transcript

Speaker 1 Hey, pardon my take, listeners. You can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube.
Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music.

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Speaker 1 On today's part in my take, we have a very special guest, Raiders quarterback Brian Hoyer. We're also going to bring back one question with the quarterback.

Speaker 1 Maybe not every week, but when we see fit, we have Sam Howell on for that. We're going to talk some college football.
We're going to talk the doubleheader Monday night football.

Speaker 1 We got Hot Sea Cool Throne, Jimbo's packed show for you on a Wednesday.

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Speaker 1 Okay,

Speaker 1 let's go.

Speaker 1 Now in the street, there is violence.

Speaker 1 And then a lot of work to be done.

Speaker 1 No place to hang out or washing.

Speaker 1 And then I can't blame all of the songs. Oh, no, we're gonna rock it down to Elaine Trick I venue.

Speaker 1 And then we'll take it higher.

Speaker 1 Oh, we're gonna rock it down to Elaine.

Speaker 1 It's part of my take. It isn't about Marshall Sports.

Speaker 1 Welcome to Part of My Take. Today is Wednesday, September 20th.

Speaker 1 And boys,

Speaker 1 there's a chance that Aaron Rodgers is having a better year than Deshaun Watson. I don't think so, Big Cat.
He got his Achilles torn. Yeah, but Deshaun Watson is very bad.
He was so bad.

Speaker 1 Baker Mayfield is smiling.

Speaker 1 He was bad. The first interception wasn't his fault.

Speaker 1 That's probably fair. That's fair.
But he was so bad, Hank. And Baker Mayfield is smiling.
Baker Mayfield is so happy to see this. They ran him out of town in Cleveland.

Speaker 1 I've been saying ever since Baker got that raw deal that they didn't know what they had when they had Baker.

Speaker 1 When you're the Browns, you've got to be happy sometimes with having a serviceable quarterback.

Speaker 1 And they thought that they could go ahead and break the structure of the NFL salary cap and give a sex predator $240 million guaranteed. Not working out so well for the Browns.

Speaker 1 So I have some stats for you. Deshaun Watson, out of the 35 quarterbacks with 200 passing attempts since the start of 2022.
So he played half of the year last year,

Speaker 1 played two games this year so far. He's 33rd in yards

Speaker 1 per attempt, just below Carson Wentz. He's 33rd in passer rating,

Speaker 1 just below Davis Mills.

Speaker 1 34th in sack rate, 34th in completion percentage, 30th in success rate. By any measure, he is one of the worst quarterbacks right now.

Speaker 1 Obviously,

Speaker 1 he's shown that he can play quarterback in the NFL, so he has a resume that if he can get back to that, it's worth the investment. But as we're sitting here, Deshaun Watson, it is ugly.

Speaker 1 He also might have created a burner account after the game.

Speaker 1 Did you see the screenshots of that? Yeah, that rule. So, allegedly from Deshaun, I think it was called the Twitter account, it was like Gainesville Raised or something like that.

Speaker 1 All the tweets that he had were about Deshaun Watson replying to people who were replying to tweets about the Browns game, saying, Not his fault, he doesn't call the plays, not his fault.

Speaker 1 Give Deshaun time, still one of the best quarterbacks in the NFL. So, he might be out there still standing up for himself.
He's the last person that believes in Deshaun Watson. Yes,

Speaker 1 now I do feel for Browns fans. I feel like I like Browns fans, I really do.

Speaker 1 It was a disastrous night.

Speaker 1 I want them to be happy. They've been just a dismal franchise for a long time.
But Deshaun Watson,

Speaker 1 it's ridiculous how poorly he's played since he's come back.

Speaker 1 And then you had, obviously, the Nick Chubb injury, which was, I don't know, Nick Chubb is probably like one of the most liked guys, I feel like.

Speaker 1 Even if you're not a Browns fan, you love watching Nick Chubb play football.

Speaker 1 And that sucked so bad because his knee, well, Schefter tried to dupe us.

Speaker 1 Schefter reported about his knee injury from 2015 and phrased it in a way where you read the first part of the tweet and you're like, oh, they already diagnosed that he tore everything in his knee.

Speaker 1 He probably did tear everything in his knee, but Schefter was doing that for clicks.

Speaker 1 He got some good engagement on that. Like a real NFL fan, I keep Shefty notifications on during the season.
Correct. So it popped up on my phone.
I had the dot, dot, dots afterwards.

Speaker 1 So it said Nick Chubb tore his LCL, PCL, ACL, MCL,

Speaker 1 cartilage damage. Yeah.
And then dot, dot, dot. And then I opened it up, and it was in 2015.
In a game against Tennessee. In a game against Tennessee.
We'll see if he can recover from this one.

Speaker 1 It's never a good sign when your running back hurts himself and Willis McGahy starts trending on Twitter. Yes.

Speaker 1 That's a big sign that something's wrong. It's also crazy they didn't show the replay.

Speaker 1 That's insane. They showed us DeMar Hamlin dying on a field.
So when it happened, Joe Buck was like, and I'm being told that we're not going to show the replay. It's that bad.

Speaker 1 As Joe Buck's saying that, you hear the crowd reaction in Pittsburgh to them seeing the replay live.

Speaker 1 and to me that was almost worse than watching the replay because you hear that and it's a bunch of Pittsburgh fans who want Nick Chubb out of the game they don't want him injured but they obviously don't want to see him scoring touchdowns against them and the entire crowd in Pittsburgh is just like oh dear god what did I just see so what what do we have to do we're basically entrapped into going online and looking for the replay and it was gnarly it was gnarly but I don't understand what when did they start doing that when did they do it sometimes that's ridiculous your your job is to telecast the game you can maybe put a warning before it but like

Speaker 1 it's not like I was like, oh, I want to see how bad is, but, like, you watched the game. Well, I kind of did because it was crazy to see.

Speaker 1 Well, when Joe Buck says, it's so bad, we're not going to show it to you. That's like your parents being like, no, you're not allowed to watch this movie.
It's got tits in it.

Speaker 1 And then I'm like, wow, Braveheart's awesome. Yeah, we can't wait till I go to my friend's house.
I'm going to watch Braveheart. Yeah, it was show the show the injury.
Show it once.

Speaker 1 Your job is to telecast the game. It's a pretty important thing that happened in the game because the Browns were moving the ball.
Nick Chubb had like 60 yards in a quarter and a half.

Speaker 1 So, but yeah, that was about as bad as you could get for a Monday night football game for the Browns.

Speaker 1 If you're a Steelers fan, you're happy that you got the win. Congrats on that.
You're happy for TJ for breaking the sack record, getting that touchdown. That was awesome.

Speaker 1 Hank, that probably brought up some bad memories for you. Seeing a TJ Watt touched him.

Speaker 1 A lot of tweets. It was so funny when Hank did that the first time.
The best. And Nick was like, wait, it says here, Derek Watt.
Derek Watt. And then all the blood drains out of our poor Hank's face.

Speaker 1 But you're probably happy if you're a Steelers fan.

Speaker 1 TJ broke the record. You got a win.
You beat a division rival. The streak stays intact.
21 straight. They haven't lost in Monday night football since 1991.
At home. At home.
At home. That's wild.

Speaker 1 21 straight home Monday night football win. Crazy streak, but you're also like, I fucking hate our offensive coordinator, and I hope that he falls into a river on the way home.
Because they were.

Speaker 1 So the Pittsburgh Steelers, at the start of the fourth quarter, they were losing 22 to 19. They gained negative seven total yards in the fourth quarter, and they won the game 26 to 22.

Speaker 1 It was basically like you were watching the game being like, the Steelers should punt on first down because the best chance they have of scoring is to get Deshaun Watson to fumble again.

Speaker 1 That was how it felt. Their defensive line was absolutely eating.

Speaker 1 They were everywhere, but their offense and that third and one call, I don't know what, maybe it was, you know, a broken play, but Kenny on a keeper on third and one, I think, out of the shotgun.

Speaker 1 And there were maybe the worst play call ever. There was misdirection, and then it ended up having like three defensive linemen in the backfield at the same time.
Smashing him. Made no sense.

Speaker 1 They didn't run a play inside the Browns' 30-yard line. Yeah.
That's pretty bad. So, Browns fans, at least you have week one.
Week one.

Speaker 1 Week one was a great win to beat the Bengals. You killed them.
You smashed them. All the hopes.
And then it just week two, it feels like their season obviously isn't over, but that losing Nick Chubb,

Speaker 1 it's devastating. It's as bad as it gets.
And yes, you did get hosed on a pass interference on the final play of the game, but the ball was a shitty pass from Deshaun. Yeah, he did.

Speaker 1 He wasn't going to catch it. If it was close, they would have called it.
Yeah, we also had the Saints and the Panthers playing Monday Night Football.

Speaker 1 It actually was, so two Monday Night Football games. Wait, I got one more thing about the Steelers game.

Speaker 1 Did you notice they did double renegade?

Speaker 1 I did not. They did double renegade, which they rarely do at Steelers games.
It's like once a season, they'll break out of Double Renegade. They brought it out, and I think it was the next play.

Speaker 1 It might have been the second play after Double Renegade was played. TJ Watt got the scoop and score for the touchdown.
Yeah, Double Renegade works. It's legit.
Renegade works.

Speaker 1 They did that when I went to the Monday Night Football game last year, two years ago, Steelers, Bears, and they did Renegade, and it was an immediate fumble for the Bears. Yeah, it's magic.

Speaker 1 It's how they keep their streak intact.

Speaker 1 But yeah, it does feel like the Steelers are going to just be a perfect Mike Tomlin team that they won't go under 500, but probably also won't make the playoffs. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And if I'm a Steelers fan, I just,

Speaker 1 I wake up wondering, what has Matt Canada done to stick around? Matt Canada sucked when he was at Wisconsin. He's sucked forever.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 He's been bad everywhere he's gone, and for some reason, he keeps getting jobs. He's probably super nice.
Yeah. Yeah, he probably is super nice.
Sorry. Sorry.
Sorry about that third downplay.

Speaker 1 So, yeah, the other game. Is he from Canada? No.
Probably.

Speaker 1 In this example, he is.

Speaker 1 They probably gave him the nickname Matt Canada because he was weak and inefficient, but super nice.

Speaker 1 The other game, so it was the doubleheader. It was kind of crazy because it was like two games.
Oh, this is going to be awesome.

Speaker 1 Two Monday Night Football games when both games just kind of sucked in their own special ways.

Speaker 1 I do actually think that on a doubleheader, Kenny Pickett, Deshaun Watson, Bryce Young, Derek Carr. I think Taysom Hill was the best quarterback.
Taysom Hill looked pretty good. He looked really good.

Speaker 1 And yeah, the Panthers,

Speaker 1 we said it with Steve Smith.

Speaker 1 It's not a Bryce Young thing. It's like there's no one who's getting separation.
Adam Thielen is trying to make moves, and he has no time. And I can't really judge what I'm seeing because

Speaker 1 it's not easy for him. The one thing I didn't like about Bryce is he doesn't realize yet that defensive players are fast.

Speaker 1 So he tries to scramble out of pockets a lot and use his legs to just buy some time, keep looking downfield, and he was just getting hit left and right. Sean does that too.

Speaker 1 He thinks he can just run away and just gets killed. You get hit from behind.
You're You're like, how'd that guy catch up to me? That didn't happen in Alabama. Yeah.

Speaker 1 But the Saints, the Saints and Panthers, I mean, that was a very boring game.

Speaker 1 Derek Carr had a terrible interception in the first half. He did.
It was actually electric. I bet every quarterback to throw an interception.
Bryce Young was the only one who didn't. Oh, really? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Everyone else threw an interception. Yeah, there was one point where it was like four turnovers.
Both games had double turnovers going on within probably like a five-minute span. Yeah.

Speaker 1 It was like, why am I watching this? Oh, yeah, because it's football. It's football and we watch it.
Yeah. And Andy Dalton got to come in for a sneak.
That was kind of exciting.

Speaker 1 Andy Dalton and Josh McCown standing next to each other, all hair team. Yeah.

Speaker 1 That was a big moment. But yeah,

Speaker 1 that game, I guess it's better that there was a double header. Although I still,

Speaker 1 and this is for people who have more than one TV,

Speaker 1 the ESPN, or sorry, one game was on ESPN, one game was on ABC, or ESPN 2.

Speaker 5 ABC and ESPN.

Speaker 1 Okay, so the George Pickens touchdown, we found out about about it before it happened because they changed the score bug on the ESPN Panther Saints game. Was that an app thing? Were you watching?

Speaker 1 No, no, no.

Speaker 1 I was watching the game on the app, too. So it might be like live TV duking you out.
It was crazy.

Speaker 1 It was not like significant timing, but it was the score changed. I looked down.
George Pickens caught the ball. I was like, well, this is going to the house.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 And George Pickens is such a psycho. I love him.
I do think he's the perfect amount of insane. When he tried to jump, when he tried to hurdle someone for no, like, the guy was standing upright.

Speaker 1 He was like, I'm just going to jump into you. It actually kind of worked for an extra yard.
Yeah, because the guy was like, what was that move?

Speaker 1 The guy tried to catch him because it was like a dance move. It was like flash dance.
Yeah. It's like, yeah, I'll catch you and I'll spin you around, George.
He didn't try and jump.

Speaker 1 He didn't try and hurdle. Right.
Like, he didn't, he didn't lose his balance. He just jumped up in the air.
You know what? He gets the zoomies.

Speaker 1 He gets the zoomies. You need to get him the ball because

Speaker 1 he's going to freak if he doesn't get the ball. Yeah.
And the Steelers also, their offense just looks so slow. Najee Harris, I don't know why he got so slow.
I don't know.

Speaker 1 It's painful because you watch how slow he is. Was he always this slow? No, he was not that slow at Alabama.
He wasn't like a burner. Yeah, but he wasn't that slow.

Speaker 1 I feel like in the NFL, even his rookie year, his great plays were jumping over people, which he loves to do,

Speaker 1 and then running into somebody and bowling them over for like three yards, but he puts the guy on a poster. Right.

Speaker 1 But I don't think he was ever super fast in the NFL, but he looks slower somehow, and he's getting caught. He's not able to break it to the edge.
If he bounces to the outside, he's getting tackled.

Speaker 1 Right. And he had one play, though.
There was one play where he got stopped in the backfield and then ran around the edge. Kenny Pickett threw an awesome block.

Speaker 1 Just really laid his shoulder into the guy.

Speaker 1 But besides that,

Speaker 1 it's painful to watch the Steelers offense. And another thing, if I'm a Steelers fan, we got to do something about Mike Tomlins' challenge situation.
Oh, he's so bad.

Speaker 1 But I think it's so funny how bad he is. It is.
It's very, very funny. It feels like a bit at this point because they'll show the replay.
Wait, he did win one, though.

Speaker 1 No, I don't think that was an actual challenge. They didn't count that as a challenge.
I think he tried to challenge it, but it was already overturned. Got it.
So he should get credit for that.

Speaker 1 He would have gotten that one out. Yeah, he should get credit for that.
But the play, was it the Amari Cooper catch? Yes.

Speaker 1 And he threw the flag after they just showed the replay and Troy Aikman was like, that's just a great catch by Amari Cooper. And you saw the two feet down.
Mike Tomlin is not watching the same game.

Speaker 1 Whoever, does he have a challenge guy? Or I think his challenge guy is his players. And his players, a defensive back, will always run up to you like, that guy didn't catch it.

Speaker 1 There's no way that guy got a a catch on me. I like how he challenges, though, because he challenges how any of us would challenge.
It's just pure frustration. So it's not like it's a 50-50 call.

Speaker 1 We got to go look at it. It's, fuck, how'd we give up that long third down? This is a legal challenge.
Yeah, I wish. That's exactly how I would challenge the NFL.
He does.

Speaker 1 I wish that play didn't happen. Right.

Speaker 1 Can we just redo? There's a mechanism in the NFL where you can eliminate a play. I don't care about what the rules are behind it.
I'm just going to throw the flag that makes the play go back.

Speaker 1 He's constantly doing like basketball, just checkball. Checkball up top.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Let's reset reset this it's it's it's it's not fair it's not fair what happens we've talked about it on the show but there should be like nfl coaches aren't great at watching football they don't watch enough they watch film but they don't watch football on tv from the angles that we watch it right we're better at knowing when you should throw the challenge flag than nfl coaches are right if there's somebody out there that just spends all day sunday uh all night monday all night thursday all day saturday watching football You are better at knowing when to challenge a call is than an actual NFL head coach.

Speaker 1 It's Malcolm Gladwell 10,000 Hours. I've watched more football than an NFL hood coach.
We're excellent. It's not like a brag.

Speaker 1 You don't think so, Hank? No, but we're talking about football. The actual game.
Yeah, we've watched so much more football.

Speaker 1 And that's when you're making the decision. It's not, again, like PFT said, it's not film like, how do I beat this defense?

Speaker 1 Obviously, coaches are way better than that at us, but we're talking about actual game footage

Speaker 1 and the challenge, yes. Like the NBC at angle where they zoom in real tight.
Coaches don't know what that is. They have no idea.
They don't even know the yellow line. They don't know the green zone.

Speaker 1 Yeah. They don't know the pylon cam.
They don't know the sky cam. I had to correct Jerry last night.
The yellow line's not official because he was like, look. I was like, dude.

Speaker 1 To be line, not official. To be fair to Jerry, they never say that on podcasts.
They used to when they first unveiled. Well, they don't say it as much anymore.
They first unveiled it.

Speaker 1 They said it all the time. Yeah, yeah.
It was like, man. They need to send a reminder.
to everyone. Yellow line, not official.

Speaker 1 I think anybody that watches football knows that the yellow line's not official. Yeah, but it gets confusing sometimes.
You watch too much football.

Speaker 5 Rich Eisen's Twitter bio.

Speaker 1 What? The yellow line's unofficial. He is.
That's a good one, Rich. That's a fucking good one.

Speaker 1 He got us there. All right, let's talk.
Never mind. What? No, I was going to make a joke, but I'm not going to say the joke.
You might as well say it now. No, you guys.

Speaker 1 Somebody will know what the joke was.

Speaker 1 Okay. It was going to be a cheap shot at Hank and his quarterback.
Oh.

Speaker 1 Go ahead and just do it. When Mac Jones is driving on the roads, the yellow line's not official there either.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Had a couple guys.

Speaker 1 He needs a lighthouse to find a way to get home.

Speaker 1 Speaking of the lighthouse,

Speaker 1 lighthouse talk.

Speaker 1 Hank,

Speaker 1 I reached out.

Speaker 1 Someone invited us to the lighthouse. Yeah, we should go.

Speaker 1 I'll burn it down. I got multiple invites.

Speaker 1 Can we podcast? Be like the Ramsey Usap. Stop talking about that fucking lighthouse.
Listen, we'll stop talking about the lighthouse when Hank stops bringing it up every show. Yeah, he'll bring it up.

Speaker 1 Shout out to Alexandra for inviting us. Hank, since you brought it up, I do have a lighthouse update for you.

Speaker 1 I did bring it up. And I did.
You did bring it up. I reached out to the United States Coast Guard, Commander.
You already did this.

Speaker 1 Well, I heard back from the Coast Guard. Active? Yes.
Is he active? What do you mean, active?

Speaker 1 Are you looking at this guy's credentials? Well, some of these retired guys just start spouting off conspiracies just to get in the media. Hank, he is a commander.
Current? Current commander.

Speaker 1 Okay, salute. All right, Hank.
Yeah, no, commander

Speaker 1 Matt Kroll, director, U.S. Coast Guard,

Speaker 1 motion picture and television liaison office. Okay, so this is fake.
Yep, love this. He's a commander.

Speaker 1 Commander. Respect the commanders.
They're two and a half.

Speaker 1 Commander of television? Can I finish? Sounds like you don't want to hear the facts. Sounds like all you want to do is talk about the lighthouse.

Speaker 1 My name is PFT Compter, and I do the part of my Take Sports podcast for Barcelon Sports.

Speaker 1 I'm writing to you concerning a matter of public debate surrounding lighthouses, which I understand fall under the purview of the United States Coast Guard.

Speaker 1 Recently, a dispute has emerged regarding the legitimacy of the new 208-foot-tall, quote, lighthouse that was constructed at Gillette Stadium.

Speaker 1 It was built to replace the old lighthouse, which was rendered obsolete due to being completely blocked out by the stadium's new Jumbotron.

Speaker 1 On one side of the debate are Patriots fans who claim that this is the tallest lighthouse in the United States.

Speaker 1 The team has made numerous public statements to that regard, and many supporters of the organization believe it to be true.

Speaker 1 On the other side of the debate are those who recognize the Cape Hatteras Lighthouse as being the tallest U.S. lighthouse.

Speaker 1 And if the Gillette Stadium lighthouse qualifies as being the tallest, we must then acknowledge that Lady Liberty herself, which actually functioned at one time as a lighthouse, would be the rightful holder of the title, as she stands nearly 100 feet taller than the Gillette Stadium structure.

Speaker 1 And is on water. I wanted to ask for the Coast Guard's official opinion on the matter, given the public discourse surrounding the claims.

Speaker 1 Publications of note, such as the Sports Business Journal, have taken to regurgitating the Gillette Stadium press releases and backing their claims.

Speaker 1 As you can imagine, this has led to a lot of confusion.

Speaker 1 Commander Crohl writes back, Good morning. Thank you for reaching out.
I attached our lighthouse fact sheet that should help answer some of your questions.

Speaker 1 It clearly lists Cape Hatteras as the tallest, which refers to the total length of the structure itself.

Speaker 1 This is why the Statue of Liberty at 151 feet without her pedestal would not be considered the tallest. Cape Mendocino is actually the highest above sea level at 515.

Speaker 1 I hope your listeners enjoy these lighthouse facts, and please let me know if you have any additional questions.

Speaker 1 Per the United States Coast Guard, the Cape Hatteras Lighthouse is the official tallest lighthouse in in the United States, not your fucked-up Fugesi piece of bullshit.

Speaker 1 Well, I don't know when do they update those records? Maybe it's like today, because the guy wrote me back. No, but like, maybe it's like that's you know, like old Madden.

Speaker 1 You'll have to like old Madden games, like old Madden games. You have to reply and say, are these updated as of today? I asked him the question on Saturday.
He wrote me back yesterday.

Speaker 1 But it is a very new lighthouse. Yeah, but those are just general guidelines.

Speaker 1 No, he says.

Speaker 1 Did you open the attachment? I did open the attachment. That seems like a sheet that maybe needs to be updated.
Yeah, it's like a Madden game. You don't have to wait

Speaker 1 until the next year for an updated roster. TFT, you got to reply, and we got to update the people on Friday.
Tallest Lighthouse, Cape Hatteras, North Carolina. That's a fact.

Speaker 1 Just reply and be like, is this current as of today, September 20th?

Speaker 1 And then we'll on Friday, we'll let everyone know when we do our lighthouse segment.

Speaker 1 I just thought that was interesting that the Coast Guard itself says that you're one guy from the director of television.

Speaker 1 He's a commander. Commander.
Commander has. Show some fucking fucking respect, Hank.
So your lighthouse is Stolen Valor. No, it's not.
It is. No, it's not.

Speaker 1 You're claiming that it's a lighthouse when, in fact. And you're also claiming it's the tallest lighthouse in the house.
It is the tallest lighthouse. All right, well, we'll find out.

Speaker 1 We'll find out when we do the follow-up.

Speaker 1 I'm happy we had this. I'm going to make some calls.
No, now that I know.

Speaker 1 Who are you going to call?

Speaker 1 You got a lighthouse guy. Okay.
Are they commanders? Yeah, probably. All right, you bring your facts, and Piety will bring his.

Speaker 1 Is there anything higher than Commander? General? I know. Chief of Staff?

Speaker 1 I don't know. Commander,

Speaker 1 General? Yeah. I don't think the Coast Guard has generals, do they? I don't know.
Okay, well, either way,

Speaker 1 let's talk some college football.

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Speaker 1 College football. Let's start

Speaker 1 with the only way you can start. Alabama's washed.
Alabama is so washed. Don, Nick Saban is so bad at coaching football, big cat.
He is one of the worst football coaches in college.

Speaker 1 Did you see the video of Nick Saban coming? Because they had, so they played USF.

Speaker 1 There was a weather delay. And they were coming into the locker room.
It was just pouring on them. And they were coming in the locker room.

Speaker 1 And there was like a maybe a three-second video of Nick Saban walking the locker room, wet, tired, sad. And that was the first time where I was like, oh, Nick Saban, like the thoughts might creep in.

Speaker 1 Like, why the fuck am I doing this right now? Yeah, it doesn't make a lot of sense.

Speaker 1 Unless Nick Saban is the type of hyper-competitive coach where he wants to put together a solid season without having a good quarterback at all. Yeah.
So Jalen Milro's back to being the starter.

Speaker 1 It does feel different than the past times that that Alabama has, quote unquote, been down because even like when you look at, I think the last time they were outside of the top 10 was maybe 2015, and I believe they won a national title that year.

Speaker 1 So, like, every time you look for Alabama stat, that's like, ooh, Alabama trending down. It's like, well, then they won a national title within a year of that.
Yeah, it doesn't look good, though.

Speaker 1 Like, I don't see a way that they climb out into contention in the SEC with the current roster that they have, with this current program that they have in place right now.

Speaker 1 He'll probably get like a beast of a quarterback next year. They'll be fine because it's not like Nick Saban stopped recruiting elite defensive players and elite skill position players

Speaker 1 and elite offensive linemen. They're probably actually one piece away.
And they also, the craziest part is,

Speaker 1 I think that we're so used to Alabama obviously being so dominant. It's not that they

Speaker 1 have quarterbacks that are, if you look at them, they're all top recruits and they're guys that were heralded coming out of high school.

Speaker 1 it just hasn't translated so jalen milro is back to being the starter i actually think that's the right move because at least with jalen milro even though the throwing is not really there you can at least make explosive plays running the question just occurred to me big cat um did we texases back ourselves the same way that we texases backed ourselves back in like 2017 when they beat

Speaker 1 down yeah they beat it down well texas struggled with wyoming yeah i know they were in the i mean they ended up winning by like 28 but the fourth quarter i think we might have backed ourselves into a corner on that because

Speaker 1 everyone thought that this was like a huge win against an elite program that's going to dominate this year, maybe not win a national championship, but at least be, you know, relatively Alabama-like.

Speaker 1 And they win a big game primetime. Everybody's watching it.
And then they struggle the next week. Now I'm starting to doubt my entire Texas is going to make the college football playoff take.

Speaker 1 Well, it feels like this college football season, I hope I'm right, because these are the best college football seasons.

Speaker 1 No one's really that good because you had also Georgia struggling with South Carolina in the first half. I think Georgia is still very, very good.
Don't get me wrong.

Speaker 1 But because their schedule is so weak, we're going to be able to say who have they played all year long.

Speaker 1 You know, Michigan has not played a team yet.

Speaker 1 They've just been rolling through people.

Speaker 1 You saw Oregon struggle at Texas Tech. Washington actually has been dominant.
But like, maybe everyone is, there's a lot of really good teams, but no superpower team, which I love.

Speaker 1 That's the best college football. I love it.
It's going to be chaos down the stretch. I can't wait for it.

Speaker 1 I think that I think Alabama is going to be good, but I am concerned about the fact that Texas may have beaten a fraudulent Alabama team. We'll find out this week.
Now we're going to find out.

Speaker 1 This weekend schedule is so awesome. But before we get to this weekend, there is a very important update that we have to give on Iowa's quest

Speaker 1 for 25 points per game. I bet the team total over on Iowa, thinking in the back of my head, he's got a chance to rack up some points this week after starting 20 points, 24 points.

Speaker 1 They were only averaging 22 going into this weekend.

Speaker 1 And then Brian Ference keeps his offense on the field. They go for it on fourth down to try to.
It also covered the spread, but also just gave them meaningless points.

Speaker 1 It was 41 to 10 as opposed to being 34 to 10. So they cover the spread and they hit the team total over, bringing their average up to a whopping 28.3 points per game.
He's sitting good right now.

Speaker 1 He's got to go to Happy Valley this weekend, but he's sitting good as it stands right now.

Speaker 1 Yeah, there, I mean, it is so funny that, and I've seen some Iowa fans being like, let's stop talking about it. It's like, you put it in his contract.
Yeah, it's a wild

Speaker 1 when the Cardinals put in Kyler Murray's contract. Hey, you have to watch actual film and you play video games all the time.
We're going to talk about it because it's there.

Speaker 1 It's also a fun storyline to keep track of. Yes, it is.
All right. So the other big story, obviously, is

Speaker 1 Colorado. And

Speaker 1 we saw an electric atmosphere. 9.3 million people watched on Saturday night, late kickoff.
Colorado, Colorado State was such a fun game to watch.

Speaker 1 It was like a game, and then also a sideshow of who can we interview on the sidelines and just, you know, the late hits, the Travis Hunter, who hurt or injured, Morgan Morgan, hurt or injured, lacerated liver.

Speaker 1 Yeah. I think that's, I think that's

Speaker 1 injured. No, I'm going to say it's hurt.
I basically played from 26 until I was 35 with a lot with the equivalent of a lacerated liver, I showed up to work every day, did this podcast.

Speaker 1 It's not that big. The liver reheals itself.
It's amazing. Basically, Travis Hunter's hungover.
Yeah, and so thank you to Morgan and Morgan, our wonderful sponsor, Herder Injured.

Speaker 1 He did a Twitch stream where he was dressed up as

Speaker 1 kangaroo cheetah. I don't know what he was dressed up.
He's wearing pajamas, giraffe pajamas. Giraffe pajamas.
He had some, looked like some anime pillows in the background.

Speaker 1 He had a PlayStation controller pillow.

Speaker 1 And he was like, I would have kept it. it's so funny because he's like one of the best athletes, and he's it's it's kind of cool.

Speaker 1 He's, I feel like he's gonna get big-time sponsorships just by being whenever an athlete is also a nerd, yeah. And it was like, What's this? He's got a race car bed, yeah.

Speaker 1 But uh, he said he would have kept playing if it weren't for the doctors, so thankfully, the doctors are like, Hey, dude, you have an internal injury that is very bad.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that was a dirty-ass hit that he took, too, on the sidelines. He had like three or four steps to prepare himself.

Speaker 1 Uh, the safety did that was coming in, three or four steps to pull up, and then just laid into him.

Speaker 1 It was bad, and I feel bad for Travis Hunter, obviously.

Speaker 1 That's a tough injury, especially when your coach, after you lacerate your liver, your coach is like, Yeah, he should be back in three to four weeks. Three weeks, yeah.

Speaker 1 I'd be like, Let's just give it, let's give it a couple days to see how it's doing before we say that.

Speaker 1 I feel bad for him that he's going to have to sit out, that he's dealing with that injury, but I also feel bad for us as college football fans that we don't get to watch.

Speaker 1 Yes, and I also feel bad for the kid who obviously was a late hit, dirty hit, but it was kind of ridiculous.

Speaker 1 Like, I guess by the time the game ended, his phone number, his address, his parents' phone number, his parents' address had been leaked on the internet. People were going pretty crazy at him.

Speaker 1 Deion did a good job today of like... you know, dampering that down by just being like, what is everyone doing? Like,

Speaker 1 we've made our peace. It was a dirty hit, but we can't, like, this is crazy.
I also, there were some people who were saying that he should be kicked out of the NCAA.

Speaker 1 I actually thought Sir Jerma Jerma J.

Speaker 1 Jackson had the best take on it. He said,

Speaker 1 y'all doing too much now, bruh. Terrible play.
He should have been ejaculated. As soon as I seen that hit, I would have ejaculated him.

Speaker 1 But to say he needs to be banned from competing in college football ever again is crazy, dog. You're all acting soft as fuck.
I like that take a lot because it takes

Speaker 1 all the aggression out of him. He's probably not going to do a dirty late hit.
Like, if somebody was on the sidelines assigned to jack off

Speaker 1 Vanta's Berfict

Speaker 1 in the middle of a game, Antonio Brown would probably still be on the Steelers. It also would have been embarrassing for him.
You'd have to come in front of everyone. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 It's a classic mix-up.

Speaker 5 Yeah. Words sound similar.

Speaker 1 Ejaculation. Ejaculation.
Ejaculate. Yeah.
But yeah, the Colorado. So I have a question for you guys.

Speaker 1 Obviously, we are in a different position because we know Deion personally.

Speaker 1 Why is Deion getting so much hate? I don't get it.

Speaker 1 Is he getting hate? I think people are rooting for Colorado to lose very badly, and I think they will lose against Oregon.

Speaker 1 I feel like people are rooting for them to win. Yeah, they're rooting.
Like the most bet team.

Speaker 1 No, I know the bets. I'm saying, though, people, it feels like a lot of people want Colorado.

Speaker 1 Like, you had like Danny Connell, which was very funny because Danny Connell went after Deion, and then someone pointed out that the last pass Danny Connell threw as a starter was a pick six to Deion.

Speaker 1 Yeah. And they're like, maybe this is why.
There's just, maybe I'm way off, but it is a very fun story.

Speaker 1 You love in sports when someone talks the talk and then backs it up. I do think they'll probably lose to Oregon, but it's fucking, it's, it's the college football story in the first month of the year.

Speaker 1 I think maybe people are just fatigued with talking about Colorado. I don't know.
I don't, I don't think they're weighing, they had the rock. I know, no, I know that.
So sick.

Speaker 1 But whenever someone gets big, the haters come out.

Speaker 1 I don't think they're a downfall. I don't think they're out yet.
I think it's still a fun story that most people are ruining. I think if they lose

Speaker 1 Oregon, when the hater pays. When the visor and

Speaker 1 the guy that wears the visor, Norvell, when he was like, yeah, I take off my glasses and my hat when I talk to adults. That's what my mom taught me.
Everybody was like, this guy fucked up. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I think people are rooting for Colorado to win because it's a fun story. And especially, like, you can't, you can talk about Deion, but also his players are pretty good.

Speaker 1 Like, his son is legitimately one of the best quarterbacks in Division I football. And he's had, what, is this?

Speaker 1 That was his second, his second come from behind win in the fourth quarter? Yeah, 98-yard drive. 98-yard drive.
He's legitimately awesome. He's fun to watch.
He seems like a nice guy.

Speaker 1 Deion, I think for the most part, has been likable Deion. He hasn't crossed that line where it's like, okay, Deion is now like being over cocky, making it too much about himself.

Speaker 1 That will probably happen at some point if they beat Oregon, if they continue to win. Then you'll get people rooting against him.
But I feel like for the most part, it's 90%

Speaker 1 for Colorado. Yeah, I think there's a lot of love.
I guess I'm more just expecting. what's going to happen than like, ha, they're frauds.

Speaker 1 Like, no, they're playing a really good Oregon team in Austin Stadium. It's going to be a very difficult game.

Speaker 1 If Deion was the coach of Florida State and he was having a lot of success right off the bat, I think people would be like, I'm sick of Deion. I hope somebody beats him.

Speaker 1 But the fact that it's Colorado that has been so bad for so long, and they just, I just saw it today, they sold out the rest of their season in Boulder.

Speaker 1 And it's the first time that it's ever happened. And they probably did that before they realized that the USC game is going to be 10 a.m.
local time. Oh, that stinks.
That's tough for college kids.

Speaker 1 Yeah, they want to get the big noon kickoff. So 10 a.m., USC will be playing game clock 9 a.m.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 We got to think. Okay, Danny was, that's a given.
That's like the free space in the center when you're playing. Oh, it's so funny.

Speaker 1 If you're playing bingo, like, who, what other college football pundit or media member will be the first to turn on Dion? Oh, I think it might be Urban. Ooh, interesting.
I feel like Urban.

Speaker 1 So that's a coach-to-coach thing. That's never stopped Urban before.
He did the commercials.

Speaker 1 He did

Speaker 1 Sabin. It was Sabin.
Half-line. Yeah.
Same thing.

Speaker 1 Not the same guy. Not the same guy.

Speaker 1 But yeah, Colorado is an awesome, awesome story to watch.

Speaker 1 It's really all like sometimes it's fun. I think

Speaker 1 what I'm thinking about it is it's similar to like Conor McGregor when Conor McGregor would talk his shit and then backed it up over and over. People loved it.

Speaker 1 And then when he loses, it's like the avalanche comes. So it's maybe like I'm anticipating the avalanche.
But no matter what, already Colorado season is a success. They won one game last year.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I think it's going to be Stanford Steve. I think Stanford Steve will be the first to turn on Deion.
Yeah. That piece of shit.
We need to get him back on the show.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we do got to get him back on the show. All right, other college football stories.
Penn State looks good, Max. You ready for Iowa?

Speaker 1 Yeah, I think we're going to smoke Iowa. Ooh, and Ohio State Notre Dame is going to be awesome on Saturday.
So many good games. So many good games.

Speaker 1 I have to fly on Saturday at some point, and there's no good time to fly. Yeah.
We also had my favorite quote of the week was from UTSA head coach Jeff Trailer.

Speaker 1 After they lost, I believe it was Friday night, he said, frustrating, man. There's got to be an easier way to make a living somewhere else.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 That's a good sign of confidence. I like that.

Speaker 1 You know the season's going well, and you're like, what if I just...

Speaker 1 What if I just did like mall security? Didn't that guy also say, like, I missed the days when kickers and punters could smoke cigarettes and drink beer? Yeah, he's funny.

Speaker 1 Back when you could could have fun in America. He's fun.
He's fun. You can't spell nutsack without UTSA.
That's what chaps taught me. That's a fact.
But yeah, this weekend is going to be awesome.

Speaker 1 I'm very, very excited.

Speaker 1 And Colorado, Oregon, like, I do think Oregon, I think Oregon's going to win by a lot. Oh, I know what I want to say.
Hank, you went to the Michigan State bar. Yeah.
Washington might be.

Speaker 1 I might have to put a future on Washington. They're so electric.
Washington looked really good. They put like 700-plus yards.
Peenix is good. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Michigan State has a quarterback that can't throw and they can't tackle on defense. Those seem important.
One of the worst combinations you can have. It was tough.
So, what's next? How are the fans?

Speaker 1 Real quick, give us a lowdown on what's the vibe like with Michigan State fans. Oh, yeah.
Did you get our Mel Tucker report?

Speaker 1 Mel Tucker report is that they are number two preseason ranked college basketball. Oh, everyone just kept being like, yeah, they just kept being like.
Good report.

Speaker 1 Our basketball team is going to be sick. That's a good report.
Don't worry about it. Like, we're

Speaker 1 preseason ranked number two. Yeah.
There was, I mean, there was a lot lot of people there. That's the crazy thing.
Even though Nebraska was terrible, Michigan State was terrible. The people show up.

Speaker 1 They were expecting a win. I thought it might happen.
And then they got 35 pieced in the first half. Yeah, so who, what's this weekend? Iowa? You're going to foreshadow? Six.

Speaker 1 I was thinking maybe Purdue. On Friday night against Wisconsin, you motherfucker.
Well, I got to.

Speaker 1 He knows what he's doing.

Speaker 1 No, that's good for you. No.
Hank's two teams have been outscored

Speaker 5 77-201.

Speaker 1 Oh, but Hank will find a way.

Speaker 1 Is Hank the kiss of death? If I do Iowa, they're going to lose. If I do Penn State,

Speaker 1 we do Penn State with Max. Yeah.

Speaker 7 I got some Penn State buddies coming to town this weekend.

Speaker 7 The kisser cannot come. The kisser cannot come.

Speaker 1 That's lie. The kisser's death.

Speaker 1 You should do it. It's Friday night, though.
Do it. Who cares? Yeah, but that's good for you, big time.
Dude, stop, Jake. He's going to fucking, they're going to win and he's going to rub in my face.

Speaker 1 Don't do it, Jake. Just do it.
Whatever. I don't care.
Hank, question. You piece of shit.
Factor fiction. It would be good for the show if your Boilermakers beat Big Cat's badgers.

Speaker 1 I don't want to be a Boilermaker, though, but I also don't know. No, and you don't.
I don't know when else to... I got to, you know, I don't play.
They're playing.

Speaker 1 Purdue might be playing in Evanston. Neil Armstrong.

Speaker 1 Dude, do

Speaker 1 you just beat Purdue on the road? Why don't you just do Ohio State? This is the game to get up for.

Speaker 1 True. Yeah.
True. That would be the most electric atmosphere.
True. Go with Mark Marks.
And it's, yeah, and it's a three-point spread, so you're not going to get blown out. I think it's a good call.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Because then you could get such a commission if you became a Buckeye fan.
Yeah. I would hate that.
That would actually be very funny. Just rolling around.
Duke, Patriots, Cowboys.

Speaker 1 You could use the same gene shorts you have for the Cowboys.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Okay.
Yeah. You should do that.
That's going to be an I'm so excited for that game.

Speaker 1 Let me see what produced schedule.

Speaker 1 i think they do play in evanston i think they might even play it at i think there's a game at wrigley this year oh yeah which would be fun all right well you your teams yeah so far what's the combined score i think 77 21.

Speaker 5 oh yikes

Speaker 1 double check that but we lost it i mean i left the bar at half

Speaker 1 you just like fuck this what's your statement on mil tucker hank Good riddance. No, you number two in basketball.
Number two in basketball? Yeah, what are you talking about?

Speaker 1 Number two in in basketball, dude.

Speaker 1 It's pretty easy. Number two in basketball.
Iowa's playing at Northwestern at Wrigley. That'd be fun.
Maybe that's your Northwestern. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 That'd be fun. I'll go with you.
Root on my Wildcats.

Speaker 1 My Dukes won. You see that? Yeah.
This should have been the Sun Belt Championship from last year that JMU was not allowed to play in because of antiquated NCAA rules. But we went to Troy.

Speaker 1 We won 16-14. Utah State.
We take care of business. Then maybe some people are saying game day.
Game day in Harrisonburg. We'll see.
Game Day. Okay, let's do Hot Seat Chiltz Rome.

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Speaker 1 Love it. All right.
Hank, what's your hot seat in Chiltz Roam? My hot seat is the U.S. military.
Uh-oh.

Speaker 1 You hate them. Do you need the Coast Guard? This story?

Speaker 1 Well,

Speaker 1 PFT, you can tell me, you know, F-35, are those? How expensive is an F-35? Off the top of my head,

Speaker 1 if they're on sale, you can get one for $60 mil, but they're probably like closer to $70, $80 mil. Are they important? They're very important, yeah, to the future of electronic warfare.

Speaker 1 Hey, did you guys hear this one? Did you see this one?

Speaker 1 The U.S. has lost over $100 million of jets the last week.
Oh,

Speaker 1 Aaron Rodgers and the Jets. And the new Jets.
Is that one? Yeah, that's pretty good. That's pretty good.
So for a while,

Speaker 1 the F-35 Lightning. The F-35 Lightning, they just lost it.
They said, we don't know where it is.

Speaker 1 And then it turns out that it crashed, and they're worried that it got hacked. Oh,

Speaker 1 how? I mean. I don't think it got hacked.
I mean, have you seen the inside of one of these things? Just poor piloting? It could have been. Sounds like you don't respect the troops.

Speaker 1 It could have been poor piloting. It could have been, I saw one report that he might have flown it directly into a storm or she, probably she.

Speaker 1 uh, but and then they had to bail out and eject, and the plane kept flying and it went like I don't know, 70 miles and crashed.

Speaker 1 That's insane.

Speaker 1 It is insane. It is crazy that we weren't able to find this plane for like 24 hours.
The craziest part is that the military asked Americans for help. They're like, hey, my bad.

Speaker 1 It used to be back in the day, back when the military, before it went woke, when we just crash a bomber that had a nuclear-armed bomb on it into a swamp in North Carolina, and then we just pretend it didn't happen for 40 years.

Speaker 1 That's how we used to do things back when men were men. Now we crash one F-35 and the government hops on Twitter.
It's like, hey, can you help us track this thing down? Anyone hear a plane crash?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 They crowdsourced looking for an $80 million for the future of American warfare. Yeah.
You hear a big boom on Saturday? Yeah. Let us know.
We found it.

Speaker 1 I don't know if it got hacked, Hank. There was one report that came out yesterday that the Marine Corps issued guidance saying like, hey, we're grounding grounding all these flights to do,

Speaker 1 I guess, just like safety prep and stuff. And everyone was like, Oh, they must be hacked.
I don't think they got hacked. I don't think they got hacked.
China's sending weather balloons over here.

Speaker 1 China. China.
China. Bring other weather balloons.

Speaker 1 I'll shoot down a weather balloon with my eyes closed. Sounds like you're like in the Chinese pockets.
Why? Sounds like this thing got hacked. Yeah.

Speaker 1 How could you be a pilot and not look at the fucking weather? I don't know.

Speaker 1 I'm going to take out the F-35 for a quick spin. Hope it's not raining.

Speaker 1 Maybe trying to hack the weather. Yeah.
And they made the storm. You ever think of that, Hank? That's true, too.

Speaker 1 You're just trying to, you know, rub wool over

Speaker 1 to help this plane find its way home.

Speaker 1 A pilot? No. Yeah, a pilot could call.
A lighthouse. A lighthouse would have.
A lighthouse. Yeah.
If they had a real lighthouse, that plane would

Speaker 1 never get lost.

Speaker 1 Get some tall beacons. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I'm never going to stop at the lighthouse. It makes me laugh every time.
All right, Hank, what's your chill? We should go. No, I think it's funnier if we never go.

Speaker 1 Well, that's what I realized. So I was thinking about it.
Why PFT keeps talking about this Lighthouse? You bring it up. You just brought it up.
And it's like we get invited. We can go.

Speaker 1 And then I remembered PFT is too scared of heist to actually go up. Oh, here we go.
So that's why he hates it. He's like, oh, my God, tall, tall, scary, tall.
Yeah, you're lashing out, Hank.

Speaker 1 That's fine. That's fine.
Well, I was just trying to tell us why does PFT hate this fucking lighthouse so much? I was like, oh, yeah, it's tall. He hates it.

Speaker 1 But the better question is, why do you keep bringing it up?

Speaker 1 I'm done. Okay, I'm done.
But we should go.

Speaker 1 I'm sure you're done. But we should go.

Speaker 1 We should go. Well, me and Bitcatcher go.
Would you fuck the lighthouse?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 You sprung it up, but it's like it's too big. It's probably too big for me.
It wouldn't fit inside. It's a chill throne.
My chill throne is Sean McVay. Okay.

Speaker 1 He said the reason that he kicked the field goal with two seconds left or three seconds left in the game, down 10, was

Speaker 1 to avoid getting Matthew Stafford hurt. Oh.
Oh, yeah, it's tough. You get a lot of quarterbacks hurt on kneel downs.
Did you see

Speaker 1 also?

Speaker 1 He was like, we were thinking we were going to get a downfield play and have enough time to kick a field goal, get an on-site kick.

Speaker 1 And then once we got down there, we just said, let's kick the field goal.

Speaker 1 Did you see also Ravel was like, I tried to join the Zoom for

Speaker 1 his press conference, they didn't let me in. Very suspicious for not letting a gambling reporter in.
It's like, hey, dude, Ravel, maybe you're just annoying. Yeah.
Like, that probably was it.

Speaker 1 Yeah, sometimes the simplest explanation is the right one. Right.
I think with Ravel, it's like,

Speaker 1 why does everyone keep blocking me from all these things? They must be afraid of my reporting. Yeah, they don't want to hear the truth.
No, we just don't want to hang out with you.

Speaker 1 Pretty simple, even if it's on a Zoom. All right, you're a hot seat, chill throw, and PFT.

Speaker 1 I was actually going to do the lighthouse on the hot seat because, you know, we reached out to the Coast Guard for comment, but we've already gone through that.

Speaker 1 I don't want to re-litigate it. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Hank?

Speaker 1 I got work to do. Oh, here he goes.
He's doing it again. I got work to do.
Stop bringing it up. Stop bringing it up.

Speaker 1 So, my hot seat is going to be.

Speaker 1 I got one for you. Yeah, I got another one.

Speaker 1 The seat that's right next to Lauren Bobert. Oh.
Because

Speaker 1 a report came out that she's single again, number one. It was a first date.

Speaker 1 And that it was her first date with this guy that she was jacking off at being introduced to the musical, which is fucking hot.

Speaker 1 You know me, big cat. I like grandmothers right we got sister jean virginia mccasky lauren bobert

Speaker 1 all the grandmothers

Speaker 1 dude first date is there still a bonk list this year that's not i'm not being horny i'm being normal yeah you're being if you're not horny with the lauren bobert thing you're telling on yourself for being super horny so horny that you're afraid to admit it and also the bonk list should not have us trying to book guests like Tiffany Gomez, which we're trying to book.

Speaker 1 Correct. So if we, if you see us.
That's just a regular booking of a guest. If you see us interacting with Tiffany, please be cool about it.
We're not being horny.

Speaker 1 We just, we'd like to interview her and get her story, her side of things. PFT's trying to get her on the show, and I DM'd her.
I said, hey, what's up, Tiffany? Thanks for the follow.

Speaker 1 My co-host and good friend, PFT, is a pretty awesome dude. I think you guys connected, but wanted to give you the heads up that he rocks, LOL.
Yeah,

Speaker 1 I do rock. There are a couple of true things in that statement.
Number one, I rock.

Speaker 1 I'm a pretty awesome dude, and I have made contact with Tiffany Gomez, and I think she's interested in coming on the show. So

Speaker 1 everybody, be chill, be very cool. Don't fuck this up.
Memes did call Dibs.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so after I said, okay, I'm going to try to get her on the show,

Speaker 1 memes just goes, oh, she followed part of my take, too. I'm going to DM her.
Yeah. And then he said again, he was like, Do you guys want me to DM her? Yeah.
No, memes, we're good. We got it.

Speaker 1 We got it. We got it, bro.
Daddy's got it, memes. No problem.
Daddy, why don't you stand over there? Daddy's bringing it home.

Speaker 1 Okay. He's going to land this plane.
But I will respect Dibs. Let's get a storm.

Speaker 1 Shut the fuck up. up, Bill.

Speaker 1 My cool throne is Bills Mafia. Yeah? Bill's Mafia's back.
Big time.

Speaker 1 I saw this. Big time.
So there was a Bills fan on Sunday's game with the Raiders in town that got naked, I believe. He might have been naked.
No, he's covered in shit.

Speaker 1 He was on LSD, Coke, drunk, and he was covered in human shit, and he jumped into a pit at the Bills' new stadium site. And he got charged with trespassing, which I'm sorry, I thought this was America.

Speaker 1 Guys can't have fun in America. Kickers can't smoke cigarettes, drink beer, and a Bills fan can't take LSD and climb into the future home of the Buffalo Bills.
Crazy.

Speaker 1 I love this from Bills Mafia. I feel like it's been a while since we've seen a crazy Bills fan story, so it's good to have this back in the system.

Speaker 1 But yeah, taking LSD, he probably saw the future. He probably took LSD, saw the site that they were going to construct the stadium at.

Speaker 1 He was like, I'm going to go watch a Bills game in the future at their future home. Yes.
And he happened to be covered in shit.

Speaker 1 That could happen to anyone. I don't know how that happened.

Speaker 1 But whatever. He was 29 years old.
We all make mistakes when we're younger, but I feel like Bills Mafia is officially back. He's barely an adult.
Yeah. He's just a kid, 29 years old.

Speaker 1 I don't like the fact that I have to deal with this going into the Bills playing the Commanders this weekend. It feels like things are breaking the right way for the Bills.

Speaker 1 They're 1-0 since this guy climbed into the future stadium on LSD naked, covered in shit. And then maybe it's a win-win for the poop acid guy.
It might be, yeah, this could be an acid bet.

Speaker 1 So I feel a little nervous about that, but I am happy for Bills fans that they're back to their old selves. Yes.
All right. My hot seat, I got two.
The first is Russ, Russell Wilson.

Speaker 1 He might have to go back to a wristband. So Sean Payton was like, we're not getting the plays in in time.
It was very funny because Sean Payton was like, I'm frustrated.

Speaker 1 We're not getting the calls out. We might have to go to a wristband.
And then Russell Wilson got interviewed right after, and he was like, I thought we were doing a great job. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Like we, like, maybe one or two times we didn't, but yeah, we rock that. Can somebody explain to me what the issue is with wearing a wristband? I know a lot of quarterbacks don't want to wear one.

Speaker 1 They might steal it. They might go, what do you mean? The other team might steal it.
Oh, they might take the wristband. Yeah, they might take it.
So Russ is just being a good guardian.

Speaker 1 Very cautious, yes. Okay.

Speaker 1 And then my other hot seat is the Tampa Rays. So they got a new stadium coming.
Oh. Put out some pretty cool

Speaker 1 future graphics of the stadium and didn't really look closely when they were doing that because it's a bunch of fans walking this beautiful concourse.

Speaker 1 And one of them was wearing a Wander Franco jersey. Oh, no.

Speaker 1 Jake's favorite player. Whoops.

Speaker 5 They're also staying in St. Pete, which I guess people wanted them closer to Tampa.

Speaker 1 Oh.

Speaker 1 Is that a rivalry? No. St.
Pete and Tampa?

Speaker 5 I mean, Tampa's just more centrally located for

Speaker 1 St. Pete, St.
Pete. People forget there's no actual city called Tampa Bay.
Yeah. It's Tampa and St.
Tampa. It's just the water.
It's in a bay.

Speaker 5 It's true. Yeah.

Speaker 1 But that's tough. Yeah.
Wanda Franco jersey. You got to do one last look to make sure.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 You got to, yeah, every single piece of promotion material that comes out, have a guy with a magnifying glass. Yeah.
It's like, where's Waldo? Yeah. And then my other, or my chill throne

Speaker 1 is running backs. So obviously the Nick Chubb injury was terrible, but thankfully Robert Griffin III is back on it.

Speaker 1 So he said after the game, NFL running backs need to have another Zoom meeting and figure out a way to make sure what has happened to Saquon Barkley and Nick Chubb doesn't happen again.

Speaker 1 Underpaying top-level running backs because they have a higher injury chance and then overusing them is bonkers. Bonkers.

Speaker 1 So RG3 is the one person in the world who thought that Zoom meeting did anything? Yeah, I think so.

Speaker 1 This reads like a tweet that we would send is a joke, but he's being serious.

Speaker 1 So I think, well, I saw the news that came out right before the Nick Chubb injury that the NFL is now filing a grievance against the NFL PA because apparently, and allegedly, I don't know if this is true, but allegedly during that Zoom meeting, the running backs discussed ways that they can maintain a little bit of leverage or gain leverage, and they threw out their feigning or exaggerating injuries.

Speaker 1 That's what Nick Chubb did? And so apparently, Nick Chubb just faked his knee falling apart last night, which is wild. But no, apparently on the Zoom call, this is what they appear.

Speaker 1 Somebody discussed, like, maybe we could just play up injuries a little bit more, and then that would give us the opportunity to not have a real injury happen, and then we get to the contract sooner with our bodies intact.

Speaker 1 So so i don't know if the nfl well the nfl heard about that and now they're saying we need to attack the players association i don't know if rg3 knew that going into that the players had this master stroke this 14-dimensional chest move of like faking a hamstring yeah

Speaker 1 but just rg3's being like here's the solution another zoom yeah we'll figure this out we can't have these injuries happen let's get a zoom to talk about how we can't have injuries happen anymore could have been an email rg3 yeah yeah so good good job Maybe the running backs will get on to their Zoom.

Speaker 1 Okay, Jake.

Speaker 5 My hot seat's Disney World. A bear was on the loose in the park, and they had to close 10 rides.

Speaker 1 Oh, wow. Bears are back.

Speaker 5 Yeah, bears are back. Pretty crazy.

Speaker 1 Which rides?

Speaker 1 How are bears in Florida?

Speaker 1 That's a good question, eh?

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 I thought that was about to be done. Someone gave me a quick, dumb question look.

Speaker 1 No, I mean, I don't know anything about bear populations in Florida, but when I hear bears, I think, definitely not Disney World. No.
Was that the country country bear jamboree?

Speaker 1 The racist behavior was it the racist bear? No,

Speaker 1 it was a real bear.

Speaker 10 A Berenstein?

Speaker 1 No, huh.

Speaker 5 Pretty crazy.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I don't know what the bear is doing in Florida. Yeah.

Speaker 5 My cool throne is Stella Blue Coffee.

Speaker 1 Oh, and pickleball. Plug God.

Speaker 1 Plug God. Let's go.

Speaker 5 I'm heading down to Atlanta.

Speaker 1 I will be. Wow.
Oh, hey.

Speaker 5 Stella Blue Coffee.

Speaker 1 He has his head back so violently at the Plug God that he injured him.

Speaker 5 I will be representing the D.C. pickleball team, represented, sponsored by Stella Bukhara.

Speaker 1 That's true.

Speaker 5 At the MLP event.

Speaker 1 We also named that team, Jake.

Speaker 5 The D.C. Pickleball Team.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 5 And, yeah, come by. You can come watch.
Get tickets.

Speaker 1 Great. Are you going to play?

Speaker 5 I might play matches.

Speaker 1 I'm not going to play in the tournament. Why not?

Speaker 5 I mean, it's MLP. Okay.

Speaker 1 It's MLP, big game. So let's fucking get you in the tournament.
Awesome respect for the MLP. I have respect for the MLP.

Speaker 1 This is like when we say we could step onto the field in the NFL and rush for five yards. No, we would die in in the back.

Speaker 1 You step on a pickleball player who's in the MLP, he's going to put one through your eye hole. Jake, you're ready for the MLP.
I can do it. Yeah.

Speaker 5 I'll play with them.

Speaker 5 If you're an MLP player listening, I'll play with you this weekend. I did.

Speaker 1 Thursday, Friday. Just game week.

Speaker 1 I loved Hank's reaction because I think it was to Jake turning on the plug god voice. Yeah.
Once he started jumping into

Speaker 1 Atlanta.

Speaker 5 Chill throne.

Speaker 5 Chill throne.

Speaker 1 Childrone. M.I.
Chillthrone. Yeah.
Isn't the chilltron? Stella Blue Call me. Yeah.
Pia MLP.

Speaker 5 I'm excited to represent Stella Blue and D.C. Pickleball Thursday and Friday.
Come by. Love it.

Speaker 1 Yeah, in Atlanta.

Speaker 1 Okay. Good hot seat.
Chill thrones, everyone. Let's get to our interviews.
We have two. We have Sam Howell, one question with the quarterback.
But before we do that, we have Brian Hoyer.

Speaker 1 So a lot of questions with the quarterback. Multiple questions.
Before we do that, PFT, you got a couple ads.

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Speaker 1 And now, here's Brian Hoyer.

Speaker 1 Okay, we now welcome on a very special guest. It is Las Vegas Raiders quarterback Brian Hoyer,

Speaker 1 who has been on many teams. Super Bowl champion as well, I should say.
Do you get introduced as a Super Bowl champion?

Speaker 13 the way, when you don't play in the game, you don't get usually introduced that way, but I was on the team.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's bullshit. You should, you are a Super Bowl champion.
You are on the roster, you're in the team picture. That's yeah.

Speaker 13 You know, I was thinking about this. Um, I don't know if you remember this.
You remember when we met? We were down there in Atlanta at that restaurant. It was me and Toonie and Ted Karis.

Speaker 13 And we were at that, I think it's called Umini, that sushi place. And we, we, that was the first time I ever met you.
So, yes, I was thinking about that driving in.

Speaker 1 And I was like, Yeah, that was the week for the Super Bowl. Yeah, I was like, good luck in the game.
And I think think you were like, I hope I don't play in this game.

Speaker 1 It's like, that could be a problem. That could be a problem.
But yeah, it's hard to be an attacker quarterback.

Speaker 13 You never know.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so let's start there because I mean, you obviously started as well. I actually should say,

Speaker 1 and this might be bringing up bad things, but the Browns year that you got the starting job and that Thursday night game, I think it was, when you got hurt,

Speaker 1 I believed, I was like, this is it.

Speaker 13 Brian Hoyer, you know local kid this he's going to be the guy for the browns so i don't know if you had those same thoughts going through your head but i really i really did feel it and i was like for many years i was like a big what if like brian hoyer was the guy trust me i i saw north turner out here he was our offensive coordinator and his son scott coaches on our staff out here he's like man if you ever would have freaking learned how to slide we'd all maybe all still be there um you know it just it was bad timing it was like obviously like childhood dream you know i grew up in cleveland grew up cheering for the Browns before they left.

Speaker 13 And then all of a sudden I'm playing for them and we're winning. And, you know, if my cleat just hadn't got stuck in that grass or if Kiko Alonso hadn't hit me at the same time, like, you never know.

Speaker 13 But there's a lot of those what-ifs and a long career. And, you know, I got a chance to start again the next year.
And unfortunately, it just didn't work out.

Speaker 13 But, you know, I'm happy to still be playing. And I've learned a lot over 15 years.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I remember that year. I actually went to a Browns game and I was driving through Ohio and it was Brian Hoyer's face on Mr.
Hero billboards on the side of hero.

Speaker 1 Yeah, they loved you. They loved you in Ohio.
And then draft day came out while you were in, while you were in Cleveland, right? And I, yeah, you're right.

Speaker 13 Yeah, I remember we went to like a little premiere from that. That was pretty cool.

Speaker 1 I thought that the quarterback that they had for the Browns was like loosely based around you. Did you ever feel that?

Speaker 13 Well, it's funny because I had just kind of like. That movie was already in production before I even kind of got there.

Speaker 13 Because I remember I got there in 2013 and they had already wrapped up all all the shooting, but it was it was funny because then I go see this premiere and it's like it kind of was like the same thing.

Speaker 13 Like, are they going to draft this

Speaker 13 high-profile quarterback early? And the, you know, the GM was like, no, we're sticking with you. We're going to draft this running back and this linebacker.

Speaker 13 And, you know, it was kind of a cool, cool story, but it didn't work out that way in real life.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I never even put that together, but you're right. It was like, it was the same thing.
It was like an injured quarterback that was coming back from something, but he was good. He was solid.

Speaker 1 He's a better quarterback than the team's seen in a long time. I was like, this is, how did they write this? How did they write this before it happened? Brian Horror story.
Crazy.

Speaker 1 So, and this is always a tough question to ask because you have been a backup the majority of your career.

Speaker 1 What makes a good backup? Because we have this debate all the time on Twitter where it's like

Speaker 1 some star quarterback decides to retire. It's like, well, he would be better than all these backups, but they don't understand that being a backup quarterback, I think, is more than just

Speaker 1 talent. It's there's you got to be a guy in the locker room.
You got to be able to help the starter, all these things. So, what in your minds, you are a phenomenal backup quarterback.

Speaker 1 What in your minds, like, is that recipe for being a good backup quarterback?

Speaker 13 Yeah, well, I look at it, like, I was kind of a backup in two separate parts of my career. Like, obviously, the beginning, I'm a young guy learning from Tom Brady day in and day out.

Speaker 13 Like, was I prepared to like go in and do well if something had happened to him? Probably not as prepared as I, as I am now with all the experience that I've had.

Speaker 13 But, you know, those years when you're a backup, it's all about soaking it in and learning and

Speaker 13 obviously being ready to play. And you don't get a ton of reps, but it's a great, it was a great learning experience for me.

Speaker 13 And then I had a chance to play for a bunch of, you know, different teams, Cleveland, your team, Chicago, Houston. And then you kind of gain this,

Speaker 13 you know, obviously the playing experience and you learn from those

Speaker 13 instances. And then, you know, I went back to New England and I'm back in Tom up.
And it was a different scenario because I had actually played.

Speaker 13 And I think he valued my opinion a little bit more than when I was just this rookie guy who had never done anything and we you know had a great relationship and I'd be there on the sideline to see things and and you know when he'd come into the sideline like hey what you know what'd they play on third down and you know I'm trying to watch and be eyes from him from the sideline while also you know being ready to play and a big thing about you know backing Tom up was you know as he got older he couldn't practice every day so you know it'd be it'd be my responsibility to go in there and you know keep the team going and have a good practice and which was great because it prepared me for the game that week.

Speaker 13 And then

Speaker 13 you become a backup to a young guy like Mac Jones. And it's more about, you don't take any reps because he needs every rep and just try to impart the wisdom that you've learned over the years.

Speaker 13 And now here backing up Jimmy and

Speaker 13 kind of the same thing, having been in our offense of system for a long time, it's

Speaker 13 try to help him where he needs help. And if he asks for it, and at the same time, you know, be ready to play.
Like, you know, the first drive of the season, he ran the ball, scrambled, got hit.

Speaker 13 They had to take him out to make sure he was okay. And it's like, boom, you're thrust in there.
You just never know when it's going to be. And,

Speaker 13 you know, that's, that's probably the most difficult part is you go to the game day and you have to be mentally prepared to play, but you may not play at all. Right.

Speaker 13 And so I always found it easier as a starter because at least you have. the week going in, you know, when the offense takes the field, you're going out there and you're prepared to play 60 minutes.

Speaker 1 Did you, just a quick follow-up on that?

Speaker 1 Have you ever had a moment in your career where like the defense is just teeing off on the starting offense and and the quarterback gets hurt and you're like oh i don't want to do this

Speaker 13 i mean not that i don't want to do it it's it's the role but i oddly enough of all the years that i've been a backup quarterback it's only been one or two times where i've had to been thrust into action which is kind of crazy when you think about it right um the the for the most um notable was when i played in the colts with uh and i was backing up jacoby brissette and a lot of times like when the plays called I'm like, all right, there's a chance that he's going to get hit here.

Speaker 13 And I remember it was a play. It was like a quick pass.
And I didn't even think. And then all of a sudden, the play's over.
And I'm looking to where the ball was completed. And you hear the whistles.

Speaker 13 And I'm like, you know, what happened? And I look and Jacoby's down. I'm like, how did you get hurt on this play? You know what I mean? But one of one of the linemen had fallen into his knee.
And

Speaker 13 I'd only been there for like four or five weeks. I came at the end of training camp and I get in the game and I'm like, God, please just call some plays that I know.

Speaker 13 I remember one time there was at one point we called a run play and I'm looking at the defense.

Speaker 13 We're playing the Steelers and it's like a run to the left and they have like seven guys over there and our center was Ryan Kelly and I go, Ryan, we can't we can't run this play.

Speaker 13 Like how do I get a play to the right?

Speaker 1 And he like said the name. I'm like, all right, that's the one we're doing.
Let's go and go to the right and you know, get it first down.

Speaker 13 But,

Speaker 13 you know, sometimes you just got to go on the fly. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Did you always know where your helmet was just in case? Even though you've only been like jumped into action.

Speaker 13 I'm a couple of the guys that, you know, Belichick is like, when you're the backup quarterback, you don't get an earpiece. You're like, your helmet's on.
Yeah.

Speaker 13 Because there were games you know early in my career where it'd be like second and eight and all of a sudden i hear my helmet like hoyer get in there and he just it'd be like you know sometimes it was a preseason game but it happened in a regular season game too and so you know that was part of bill's thing was always keeping on her toes and so for me when i'm on the backup my helmet's on first i got to hear the play and second like you got to be ready to go yeah that that would be my nightmare is being a backup quarterback you get a shot and then you're just running all over the side like somebody took my helmet someone took my helmet yeah get that thing back on i I always have my, when offense is on the field, my helmet's always on.

Speaker 1 When did you just, when did you learn that Belichick liked you?

Speaker 1 Good question.

Speaker 13 I don't know if I ever did, to be honest with you.

Speaker 1 I mean, he kept

Speaker 1 it. He brought you back, right?

Speaker 13 Yeah, no, I mean, I think for me, it was, you know, my rookie year, you know, I didn't get drafted. And I thought I was going to.

Speaker 13 And then, you know, of course, when you don't get drafted, you get all these teams calling you after the draft. And

Speaker 13 I remember my agent was like, hey, I think, you know, New England really likes you. And I think that's where you should go.
I have a good relationship with these guys.

Speaker 13 And I was like, Joe, you know, Tom Brady, it's like this is his ninth year.

Speaker 13 They had just drafted Kevin O'Connell, who's now the head coach in Kansas City the year before, like in the second or third round.

Speaker 13 And they had another guy who had been there for a long time, Matt Gutierrez.

Speaker 13 And he goes, just trust me, I think, you know, I've talked to Nick Casario, who was like their pro personnel guy at the time. And he's like, I think that it'll be a good fit.

Speaker 13 And worst case scenario, you get to learn from, you know, the greatest coach and the greatest quarterback of all time. And I said, all right.

Speaker 13 And I went there and I just tried to learn and soak it all in. And week after week, got better, got better.

Speaker 13 And then all of a sudden, the next thing I know, I'm Tom's backup on opening day and he's coming off of major knee reconstruction.

Speaker 13 And so I think then I kind of knew like, you know, they believed in me and that's what they wanted me to do was to be there and obviously be Tom's backup and learn from him. And then

Speaker 13 I ended up leaving and playing for a few other teams. And part of the Jimmy.
Jimmy G trade when he went to San Francisco was, you know, for me to go back to New England.

Speaker 13 And obviously, he wanted me back then, too. So, you know, it's, it's funny, like, you never know how things are going to play out.

Speaker 13 And, you know, to be able to go back there several times, I think, you know, that always showed, showed a vote of confidence.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.
So you, you won a Super Bowl and then you also lost a Super Bowl in the Patriots. What, as a backup, do you say anything after like the 2011 loss of the Giants?

Speaker 1 Do you, yeah, do you say anything or do you just like, I'm not saying shit in this locker room?

Speaker 13 Yeah. I mean, that was my first experience losing.
And, and, um, you know, for me, that, like, I don't know, this is, this is like the, the top that it could ever get to for me in my career.

Speaker 13 And to lose, it was, it was heartbreaking. And, um, you know, you go in and I remember just, I remember Tom just sitting there in his locker in his uniform for like 45 minutes, an hour.

Speaker 13 And I was like, God, like, and I was going to be a free agent the next year. So I'm like, God, is this, this could be it.
And then, you know, I was there again when we lost to the Eagles.

Speaker 13 And, you know, that game was incredible. I mean, I remember sitting on the sideline and Tom was just in the zone.
It was like he came over. He didn't say anything.
He looked at the pictures.

Speaker 13 That was it. He went back out.
And I mean, he threw for 500 and some yards in the Super Bowl. It was crazy.
And

Speaker 13 after losing it for the second time, you walk back in the locker room and you're like, geez, like maybe I'm the one that's cursed this team. I've been here for two of the losses.

Speaker 13 That made it that much sweeter when I was part of the winning team the next year when we beat the Rams.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I feel like I would try to crack a joke and everyone would be really pissed at me. That's probably exactly what I'm doing.

Speaker 1 Just be like, yeah, just get, you know, in the locker room after Super Bowl loss. Be like,

Speaker 1 we'll get them next week, guys. Something like that.

Speaker 1 The balls were too hard today. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah.
We'll get them next hour.

Speaker 1 Do you blame yourself as not being good enough on scout team to give the guys a good look at the Philly special?

Speaker 13 Oh, man. You know what? I didn't run that one.
So, you know what? I can't say I gave him a bad look because we never ran it.

Speaker 13 But, you know, that's a ballsy call in the Super Bowl, and, you know, it worked out for him. So,

Speaker 13 you know, that's like, like, you talk about backup quarterback, like a huge part of it is, you know, I took a lot of pride in prepping our defense each and every week.

Speaker 13 And to be honest with you, it's a lot of fun because you get to imitate some other guys. So, you know, you're playing against the Packers and you get to imitate Aaron Rodgers.

Speaker 13 Like you're trying to make No Look throws or Mahomes or, you know, a Josh Allen.

Speaker 13 Like there's some things that you learn, you know, skill-wise that you could try to do or attempt that maybe you wouldn't do in the confines of your own offense.

Speaker 13 And so I remember, you know, the Super Bowl against the Rams. We were, we were playing those guys.

Speaker 13 And I remember, you know, having played in the West Coast system, you know, I'm seeing a lot of these cards. I'm like, I know this play.
I've run this play.

Speaker 13 And, you know, talking it through with, you know, the McCordy's, the Hightowers, you know, those guys and saying, hey, look, like, you know, I think, you know, they're probably going to try to do this on this play.

Speaker 13 And it was pretty cool because after that Super Bowl, Devin and Jason McCordy both, you know, did an interview and talked about, you know, how I helped contribute to them and their preparation.

Speaker 13 That meant a lot for me for not having to be able to you know, take the field and take a snap, knowing that I contributed. And those guys felt like I really prepped them for the game.

Speaker 1 You are a Super Bowl champion. That's right there.
You got to just tell that story every single time. So,

Speaker 1 yeah, I mean, that's a great story. And it's got to be like a very pressure-packed situation.

Speaker 1 Be like, I don't actually get to affect how this game's going to go, but I'm part of this and I'm part of the bigger thing here.

Speaker 1 For sure. Which every single week has to be like, it kind of probably weighs on you a little bit knowing that like, I can't go out there and help them.
We got to be Jared Goff one week.

Speaker 1 You got to be Deshaun Watson the next week. It's, yeah, there's a lot that goes into being a packup quarterback.
Did Ernie Adams ever give you a little tip? Did he ever tell you something to do

Speaker 1 as the scout team?

Speaker 13 Well, funny fact about Ernie is sometimes like on Fridays, they'd let Ernie draw the cards for the scout team, and he'd come down and be like, look, I got the Transcontinental Special set up for these guys today.

Speaker 13 We're going to get him on it. It's like a double reverse pass back to the quarterback.
And like, I'm like, there's no way. He's like, oh, I saw this coordinator.

Speaker 13 He ran it back, you know, when he was the offensive coordinator in Eastern Michigan, you know, 30 years ago.

Speaker 13 So Ernie was always trying to keep those guys on the toes.

Speaker 13 And I was like, you know, it'd be funny because you could tell when a card was drawn by Ernie, it'd have all these scribbles on it, and it'd be like a crazy play. Oh, that's,

Speaker 1 he's one of the, one of our favorite, like, unsung, like, secret characters in the NFL. That I guess more.

Speaker 1 Wizard of Oz. Yeah.
Yeah. So, so Ernie was actually like involved.
Friday was Ernie Day.

Speaker 13 Yeah. There was, I mean, sometimes Thursdays.
And look, trust me, I was a a part of those offensive practices where he drew the cards for the defense. And you'd have this whole scouting report.

Speaker 13 Josh, you know, McDaniels is notorious for prepping us. Like, look, on this down and distance, we got to narrow down to this.

Speaker 13 And, you know, Ernie would have the cards and it'd be some like exotic blitz that they haven't shown in four years. And it'd catch you off guard and Bill would be like, look, there's no rule.

Speaker 13 They can't do that. Yeah.
And it would just drive me insane. So it was always fun when I got to run them, you know, against the defense because they would get pissed off.

Speaker 13 They're like, there's no way they're going to run that.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's funny that you did that too, because you did the exact same impression that Jules does when he comes on the show. So you guys both nailed Ernie Adams.

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Speaker 1 I have an insult stat for myself that's actually a positive stat for you. I don't know if you know this one.
So, Bears' insult stats always go viral. People love to do it.

Speaker 1 The Justin Jefferson won the other day. Do you know that you are tied

Speaker 1 for most 300-yard passing games in a Bears season? You're tied for the most all time with four

Speaker 1 in a season. Yeah, with Cutler, Mitch, and Billy Wade.

Speaker 1 The four of you both had four in one season. It insults that, that the most is four.

Speaker 13 I only played five games.

Speaker 1 I know. It's insane.
We should have let you keep going. It's crazy.

Speaker 13 If it wasn't for Clay Matthews destroying my formal Thursday, I have bad luck on Thursday night games, man. I actually, that was, you know, it's funny you say that.

Speaker 13 I know you're a Bears fan, but like, that was one of the most enjoyable seasons of my career. I love, I'm a Midwest kid.
I grew up in Cleveland, Chicago, you know, Lake Forest was beautiful.

Speaker 13 We loved it there. And I was playing.
I was playing well. I'm like, man, like, kind of like what you talked about in Cleveland, like, this may, I may have a chance here.

Speaker 13 And then Thursday night game, second quarter, boom.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 13 First time I ever broke a bone in my life. It was crazy.
And, and, um, but I was on a roll. We, you know, we didn't win all those games.
We were close, but um, I love playing for the Bears.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so you are one of the best Bears quarterbacks of all time, just based on that stuff. Yeah, for sure.

Speaker 1 Do you think that maybe you would have gotten more chances to start if you had gone by your name, which is Axel? Yeah. Axel? Axel Hoyer.
Axel Hoyer is,

Speaker 1 that's lightning in a bottle right there. That's a starting quarterback or a great skateboarder.

Speaker 13 Yeah. It really wasn't.
It really wasn't up to me. So my dad's name is Axel.
Hence, that's why I'm named after him. But my mom like refused.

Speaker 13 She's like, there's no way I'm calling my firstborn son Axel.

Speaker 13 So she named me brian and that's what i was always called and i always joke about it like you know second third grade you go for the first day of school like roll call and they'd be like axel hair and all the kids would laugh yeah and i'd get up and so finally i'm like mom you need to send a note and tell them i it's brian and i actually thought about switching to it when i went to college and my dad's like don't do it because like the moment you throw an interception they're going to start cheering asshole asshole instead of axle and i was like all right fair enough but you know it's it is it's cool name it's unique And especially now in this day and age of like these crazy names, everyone who meets me is like, man, why don't you go buy Axel?

Speaker 13 I'm like, you didn't grow up with it as a kid.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but you did go. I mean, going from Axel to Brian, like, no offense, dude, you lost a lot of masculinity.
It was the 80s, dude. Like, everybody was

Speaker 1 a bad one. You lost a lot of masculinity in that train.
Axel Rose. Axel Rose was a cool name in the 80s, right? That's true.
Yeah, for sure. Mine was my dad's name.

Speaker 13 It's not like it's just they meet me randomly.

Speaker 1 That is, I mean, being like, my dad's name is Axel is just as cool, actually. Now that I'm thinking about it,

Speaker 1 That's pretty badass. Yeah.

Speaker 1 That's crazy.

Speaker 13 I can still switch. I mean, Gian Carlos Stanton used to be Mike Stanton.

Speaker 1 That's true. Yeah.
That's a fact. You switch it up.
So I don't know if you watched the documentary about Johnny Manzel. We've had him on the show a couple of times.

Speaker 1 He actually worked at Parkstool for a while. From your perspective, did you...
Because you were there the first year he was at the Browns. Were you like sitting there like, this is not going well?

Speaker 1 Like, I can tell he's probably not putting in the prep work. Did you like have conversations with him about that?

Speaker 13 Yeah, you know, it's funny. Everyone always brings that up.
And, and obviously, once the Netflix thing came out, everyone here watched it. They're like, dude, I saw you all over that.

Speaker 13 I'm like, yeah, I mean, I lived through it. And, and I always felt kind of bad for Johnny.
There was so much pressure. You know, there was so much hype.

Speaker 13 And obviously, he was going through a lot of things. He and I had never had any problem.
I mean, in the building, we were great. I thought he was great in the building.

Speaker 13 I think if anything, you know, the Browns kind of knew what was going on and they still thrust this all on him. You know what I mean? And, and clearly he wasn't prepared.

Speaker 13 You know, he, he kind of jokes about it. Like, yeah, I had to watch zero hours of film.
I remember like when they called me in to say, hey, we're playing Johnny. I remember Mike Petton told me that.

Speaker 13 And I was like, okay, clearly, like, you know, this decision is being made for you guys and, you know, for the program. And that's what they chose to do.

Speaker 13 But he and I always, you know, we were, we were fine.

Speaker 13 Obviously, I was always focused on, you know, trying to prepare the best I could, but I tried to, you know, whatever knowledge I could share with him, I did. And he was always, you know, respectable.

Speaker 13 And, you know, I think, you know, there's this

Speaker 13 persona that maybe he felt like he had to live up to. I don't know.
But I felt like it was kind of an unfair situation for him, to be honest with you. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Did you ever hear the story about how the owner of the Browns was told by a homeless person to draft Johnny Manzel on draft night? And that's why they took him?

Speaker 1 When you heard that, were you like,

Speaker 1 what the hell, man? I grew up around here. Come on.
It's bullshit.

Speaker 13 I know. I mean, growing up in Cleveland and knowing, you know, that fan base is so loyal.
And they're just, they get so excited about everything. And I think that was, it was kind of weird.

Speaker 13 Like part of like the fan base was, like you said, lean towards me. And then part of it was like, ah, you know, Heisman winner.
He's going to bring us back to the promised land.

Speaker 13 And I think that was an unfair. you know, hype that was put on him, to be honest with you.
And I think the team fed into that.

Speaker 13 You know, it was, they wanted to sell the jerseys they wanted to sell the tickets and it was crazy i mean we were i remember beating the bengals i think it was the first week of november and we were in first place

Speaker 13 and you know two weeks later i was getting benched yeah and right i mean look i didn't play great but there's a lot of starters who don't play great for a week or two and the team sticks by but i think they were looking for any opportunity to thrust him in there and that's where i said like i don't know how fair that was to him either yeah yeah so now you're out in vegas and i i love allegiance stadium it's one of the best looking stadiums in the NFL.

Speaker 1 It's awesome.

Speaker 13 Yeah,

Speaker 1 have you got to check out the orb that they have there?

Speaker 13 You know what? The best view I've had is flying in, and you see it at night. I mean, it's incredible.

Speaker 13 So we actually, my family's out here, and we had like that little bye-week for the season, and we went down and saw a comedy show. We were right by it.
I mean,

Speaker 13 that thing's like out of this world. Yeah, it's crazy.

Speaker 1 It's awesome. It's nuts.

Speaker 1 Not Josh McDaniel, not Bill Belichick, because Josh McDaniel is your coach right now, and Bill Belichick is probably the greatest coach of all time. Who is your favorite coach to play for?

Speaker 1 So I'll take those two out so you can't answer those. Who's your favorite coach to play for?

Speaker 13 You know, I had two great coaches in Chicago, and since I'm talking to you, I'll definitely throw them up. They're Dahl Loggins and Dave Ragome.

Speaker 13 Funny enough, Dave Regome, my quarterback coach there, he went to my high school. He was a quarterback like six, seven years ahead of me.

Speaker 13 And considering I played like the best stretch I've ever played, Dahl was great because

Speaker 13 he was very like, oh, he'd be like, hey, what do you want to run this week?

Speaker 13 And so I had a lot of say and and we had been together in cleveland and he knew what my strengths were and and i felt very free you know playing for him um obviously i played for kyle shannon kyle's an incredible coach i learned so much from him about um you know zone coverage and how to attack zone coverage he was obsessed with that and so i i learned a lot about that i he was also you know crazy about footwork and like the way you throw and and when i first was with him in cleveland i i noticed a difference in the way i was able to throw when i worked a lot of the footwork drills that he put me through.

Speaker 13 So those three guys,

Speaker 13 you know, would definitely be at the top of the list.

Speaker 1 Good answers. When you were with Kyle Shanahan, were you like, I feel like the best quarterback ever? Because we obviously have a theory.
Brock, nothing against Brock Purdy, but we've seen it.

Speaker 1 Every time he has a quarterback, he brings the best out of the guys.

Speaker 13 Yeah, Kyle does a great job of scheming and game planning. And his offense, you know, makes it simple for the quarterback.
And I think, you know, for me,

Speaker 13 when we could run and play action, it was super, like, like you said, I felt great. I was a starter at Cleveland.

Speaker 13 You know, even though San Francisco didn't work out, I had a lot of, you know, good games out there, too. And he, he definitely puts the quarterback in a great position to succeed.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah. So out in Vegas, after week one, Max Crosby was being interviewed, and he said that Jimmy Garoppolo is a dog.
He said, Jimmy G is a dog. Would you agree? Is Jimmy G a dog?

Speaker 13 Jimmy's awesome.

Speaker 13 Oddly enough, you know, the first time I ever met him was at the Derby after we we won the Super Bowl because Tom kind of has this crew that goes to the Derby.

Speaker 13 And that was, even though we had traded places, he went to San Francisco. I went back to New England.
That was the first time I ever met him.

Speaker 13 And so getting to work with him, like you just see why this guy's a winner. He brings the same mentality every day.

Speaker 13 And he guys gravitate to him. He's got that winning personality.

Speaker 13 I think you saw it in week one when we played, you know, some tough situations and he ends up, you know, closing out the game, scrambling on a play.

Speaker 13 He's not known for being a scrambler, you know, gets the first down slides, and you could just see, you know, why this guy is a winner in the NFL.

Speaker 1 Yeah, do you ever catch yourself just staring at him, being like, damn, he's so hot? Because he is so hot.

Speaker 13 He's he is a handsome guy. Yeah, handsome guy.

Speaker 1 I know Chicago native. Yeah, I met him once, and he took my breath away.
I was like, holy fuck! Like, it's true, you are the hottest guy ever. Good looking, dude.

Speaker 1 Yeah, if I were you, I would not introduce my wife to him.

Speaker 1 Say far away.

Speaker 13 I don't think he's looking for wives. I think he's, you know,

Speaker 1 who's your favorite guy to back up, not Tom Brady. We'll take Tom Brady out of this.

Speaker 13 Uh, Jacoby Brissette.

Speaker 1 Okay. We're big, we're a big Jacoby Brissette podcast.
Yeah.

Speaker 13 Yeah. I was talking about Josh.
Like, this guy's hilarious. You talk about a dog, people who love him.
I mean, you see the respect like the Browns showed him.

Speaker 13 Like, a guy came back for a preseason game and they had like a the billboard for him. Like, welcome back, Jacoby.
We miss you. Like, this guy is one of the best guys that I've ever been around.

Speaker 13 He's hilarious. My kids love him.

Speaker 13 You know, he

Speaker 13 people gravitate towards him the same way that, you know, they gravitate towards Jimmy. I love, I love being with Jimmy too, but Jacoby and I just had a bond and, you know, we've kept that friendship.

Speaker 13 And, you know, he's always sending me texts and making me laugh. I mean, he's just, he's a great guy.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Backing up Tom Brady, I would imagine would be, it would, it would be easy kind of because you know that he's probably going to play and you're not going to have to get in too much for him.

Speaker 1 But at the same time, like trying to absorb anything that he's trying to teach since he's on such a different level than everybody else in terms of experience, what he's accomplished, the way he sees the game, all that stuff.

Speaker 1 Is there something about his game that you were actually able to emulate that made you a better quarterback?

Speaker 13 I mean, there's so many, just being around him day in, day out for so many years, you kind of pick up certain things that he does and try to incorporate them in your game.

Speaker 13 I think the thing about Tom is, you know, First and foremost, he's a great person. He's a great leader.

Speaker 13 And he knows which guy, like, he knows that he could be hard on Julian, but he's got to take it a different route with someone else. You know, he was, no one was harder on Julian than Tom.

Speaker 13 I remember because we, Julian and I came in together as rookies, and I'll never forget, like, Wes would run a route and Tom would throw it. He'd be like, good job, babe.

Speaker 13 And then Julian would do like the exact same steps. And Julian, what the fuck?

Speaker 1 Like, you know, I told you to do this.

Speaker 13 And Julian would walk back and be like, I did it the same.

Speaker 1 I did it the same. And

Speaker 1 it paid off.

Speaker 13 You know what I mean? Like, he earned, it earned Tom's trust.

Speaker 13 And, and, um, you know, and then like, I remember with Bronk, Bronk's rookie year, like, he'd keep Bronk out there and for like 40 minutes throwing extra routes.

Speaker 13 And I think what I learned the most from Tom is you always have to put in the most work so that other guys see you do, like they can't question what you're doing.

Speaker 13 And if they see you doing it, everybody kind of rises to that level.

Speaker 13 And I think that's what built such a great culture there was it not was not just guys like Tom, but like the Brewskies, the Vrabels, you know, the guys that we learned about. And then.

Speaker 13 the kind of the crew that I came in with was like Julian and Devin and Hightower.

Speaker 13 And it was always kind of cool for me because I kind of left when it was still like those older guys. And then I came back.

Speaker 13 And now, you know, Matt Slater and McCordy and Julian and Hightower were like the older guys. And they had kind of continued on that, that tradition of like, look, no one's going to outwork us.

Speaker 13 It's hard as shit here. You know, you come in every day.
Bill makes it as hard as possible, but it's the grind that kind of brings us all together. And, you know, I always loved.

Speaker 13 the locker room there.

Speaker 13 It was always the tightest knit locker rooms I've ever been in because I think we all suffered together through the meetings, through like, you know, you go into the meeting with Bill and it's like a 40-minute low lights.

Speaker 13 You'd like when those lights go off, you're like, fuck, like, what play did I mess up yesterday that's going to be on this low light? And I think it created this bond between us.

Speaker 13 Like, I mean, I was as close with the defensive backs, the defensive line as I was the receivers, the offensive line. And, you know, I think that showed in the way that, you know, we played.

Speaker 1 So, so this is going to be a hard question. You've backed up both of them.
Who's hotter? Jimmy G or Tom Brady? Who?

Speaker 13 You got to go with the OG.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Tommy. I think it's Jimmy G.
I mean,

Speaker 1 I think he's more handsome. Jimmy G.
I don't know if I'd say hotter. Jimmy G is hot.
Hotter. Jimmy G is sexy.
Tom Brady is like

Speaker 1 handsome. He's a strapping man.
Yeah. A strapping fellow.

Speaker 13 I mean, they're both good looking guys. I got nothing.
I don't hold a candle to either of them.

Speaker 1 You got nice hair.

Speaker 13 I'm bald.

Speaker 13 I just try to have a nice beard, you know?

Speaker 1 All right. So this is a dumb question, but I would love to get some insight.
We obviously watched a ton of football.

Speaker 1 You see different quarterbacks struggling younger quarterbacks struggling what do we as fans not understand about the position that is difficult to like convey to people like this is what we're seeing it one way this is how they're seeing it and that's where the disconnect is I mean, it's hard.

Speaker 13 Look,

Speaker 13 that's the reason why they say it's the hardest position in sports. There's so much variables that are going on.

Speaker 13 Every year, you're on a new team, essentially, because no team ever stays the same. So you got to learn new guys.
Every year, you're going against a new team. So they got new guys, different scheme.

Speaker 13 And, you know, I saw something, I think Albert Breer wrote about it today and it said, you know, offenses are struggling early in this year.

Speaker 13 And he, he goes, is it, is it the lack of time in the offseason and the lack of pads starting to catch up? And I, look, I'm, I'm old. I remember two a days

Speaker 13 offseasons that lasted four or five months. And, you know, now there's, there's less time.
And so is it, you know, is it going to take offenses longer to get going?

Speaker 13 Does it take younger guys to get more reps in games to get going? I don't know if that's the case. I know that we used to do a lot more work.
That's for sure.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.
So, and then what about in terms of the argument always comes up, like play calling versus quarterback play?

Speaker 1 How much do you think it is when you're criticizing a quarterback or like this guy's, you know, not playing well right now?

Speaker 1 How much do you think is play calling and how much do you think it is the quarterback play?

Speaker 13 I mean, hard to tell.

Speaker 13 I mean, it could be the thing that I've realized because I've played in a lot of different offenses is, you know, sometimes like I'll watch someone play and I'm like, what is is that guy doing?

Speaker 13 But then I realize, like, you don't know how they're being coached because I've been coached so many different ways. There's some systems where the quarterback's responsible for a lot.

Speaker 13 There's some systems where he's not. So, like, the play comes in and he's just told to run the play.
And I've been on offenses like that.

Speaker 13 And you look and you're like, man, in our scheme, we would never want to do that. But maybe that's how they're being coached.

Speaker 13 So I always kind of look at it like you, you don't fully understand the full picture. And then there's also like, man, did the guy run the right route? Was he at the right depth?

Speaker 13 Like, there's the one thing about football is there's so many variables on every given play. And there's 11 people working together.

Speaker 13 And I've always said this, like offensively, if one guy messes up, it can ruin the whole play.

Speaker 13 Defensively, if one guy falls down, does the wrong thing, if he's away from the play, you'll never know it.

Speaker 1 Right.

Speaker 13 And so I think, you know, as fans, when you're watching, there's, there's a lot of things that go into football that maybe you miss and you don't see.

Speaker 13 Like there's plays where the left, you know, I'm just referencing over the years, like there's plays where the left tackle does the wrong thing, but the quarterback throws the ball quick enough, it's in a touchdown.

Speaker 13 But there's times where the left tackle does the wrong thing and the quarterback gets blown up and it's a strip sack and it's seven points the other way.

Speaker 13 And it's that little variable right there that, you know, it just shifts the game. And I think, like you said, like, you know, what's going on? I think there's less work.

Speaker 13 There's, there's new teams and defenses are good, man. Like there's no ease, there's no slouches in the NFL.
You have to bring your A game every week or you can get beat by any team in the NFL.

Speaker 13 It's just the way it is. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Do you think that quarterback play has gotten significantly better since you've gotten into the league?

Speaker 13 I mean, there's a lot of young, talented guys. Like we just, you know, we played Josh Allen this week.
I watched that guy. I'm like, God, I wish I could play football like him.
Yeah.

Speaker 13 You know, he's 6'5.

Speaker 13 He's got a rocket arm.

Speaker 13 He's running over people. He's juking guys.
You know, you look at guys like Pat Mahomes. I mean, these young guys.

Speaker 13 They have so much talent and then there's talent around them. And then it's like basketball.
So

Speaker 13 I don't know.

Speaker 13 I mean, you look at like the generation obviously tom just retired but tom brady peyton manning drew brees aaron rodgers phillip rivers um big ben roffes yeah that was an era of great quarterback play for a long time and now you look at it's kind of shifting to these other guys and and um you know i think the one thing when you look at the college game you know they throw the ball so when i was in college we ran like the eye formation and ran the ball and now you look at quarterbacks come in the league they've thrown so much in college that you know throwing the ball is like you know i had to learn how to the pass game in the NFL.

Speaker 13 And a lot of these guys are already running, you know, pro concept, pass concepts in college.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah, you mentioned the bills game. You guys stayed at the Greenbrier leading up to the Bills game.
Usually teams do that.

Speaker 13 I thought we just you guys had a golf outing there.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's like it's usually back-to-back, right? On the East Coast, if you're playing, if you're a West Coast team, you stay at the Greenbrier. You guys actually went out there ahead of time.

Speaker 1 Why did you decide to do that?

Speaker 13 I think we were playing 1 p.m. Eastern, which is 10 a.m.
for us out here on the west coast. So, I think, you know, that ability to kind of

Speaker 13 acclimate to the Eastern time zone. So, you're not going to, you know, if you think about a 10 a.m.
game, you usually get to the stadium three hours before the game. That's at 7 a.m.

Speaker 13 Like, usually, you know, I'm just getting up at six out here. So, yeah, I think it was an idea of going out there, acclimate to the time zone.

Speaker 13 And that way, when you woke up on Sunday morning, it didn't feel like you were going to play a game at 10 a.m.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we try to figure out what goes on at the Green Briar because it's like a secret government facility. Yeah.
Teams are, what happens at the Greenbrier? Spill the beans.

Speaker 13 I mean, we practiced all week and obviously it's a historic place. I know a few of the guys went and did like there's a bunker tour.

Speaker 13 I guess they built this bunker during the Cold War in case something happened. They'd have a place for everybody in D.C.
to go to. I didn't end up going there

Speaker 13 and checking it out. But, you know, like you said, it seems like there's a storied history there.

Speaker 1 Yeah. I have to ask you one Big Ten question.
Hank actually was a Michigan State fan on Saturday. He's doing a different school every week.

Speaker 1 Not the best day to do that.

Speaker 1 Toughest place to play in the Big Ten.

Speaker 13 I'm going to go with Penn State.

Speaker 1 That's a good idea.

Speaker 13 That place, look, Ohio State is ridiculous, but it's kind of surrounded by the city. When you are driving to the stadium at Penn State, you're kind of like out in this middle of nowhere.

Speaker 13 There's like this huge erector set, and you get in there. And I think two out of the three times I played there was like a whiteout.
And one was the last game of the season.

Speaker 13 And whoever won was going to the Rose Bowl, and we got smacked, man. I mean, that's a tough, hostile environment to play.
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 All right, that's a good answer. White House looks or the whiteout looks so good at night, too.

Speaker 1 That's what it was.

Speaker 13 My senior year, my last Big Ten game was their senior day, white out, winner goes to the Rose Bowl. And it did not go well for the Spartans that day.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but you beat Michigan your last year.

Speaker 13 I did. I did.
Yep. That's, I mean, I look, the big house is a historic place, but it's not a very hostile environment.

Speaker 13 Those fans kind of sit on their hands, and especially if it's not a close game, like we played my senior year, it doesn't get very loud yeah compared to ohio state or penn state i like to talk that shit channel it is a fact it's a hundred thousand people at the opera that's what they say it's all the noise goes out

Speaker 1 right it is kind of it's kind of shaped like this yeah i mean those other places are vertical even i think even spartan stadium you know can get louder than than michigan stadium at times yeah yeah uh i want to talk about maybe the greatest play that never was when you were on the browns uh you threw an absolute dime to johnny manzel it was a trick play it was at the time when when there was a lot of chatter in the media about how Johnny was fitting in, whether or not he was rubbing the coaches the wrong way.

Speaker 1 He gets into a fake fight with Kyle Shanahan on the sidelines, who then sends him up the field. You throw a missile to him, takes it like 40 yards.

Speaker 1 I think there was like an illegal procedure or something on the offense. But at the time,

Speaker 1 what was it like when you decided to install that play? Was Kyle like, listen, everyone thinks that I hate you right now, so it would be a good idea if we pretended to get into a fight?

Speaker 13 I don't know if it was so much like, I hate you. I think it's like, like, you're going to come over and I'm going to act like I'm yelling at you to cause this distraction.

Speaker 13 And I remember that play, you know, we even practiced like the whole rotation in practice, like, okay, Johnny's going to go in. And if it's this scenario, then we're going to send it back in.

Speaker 13 And it's going to be, and the running back was supposed to stay on the field, but he didn't get like the call.

Speaker 13 I forget what happened, but basically I was in the pistol, so I couldn't see him behind me. And I thought he was set.

Speaker 13 And he thought he had to be on the right side of me.

Speaker 13 It just, it was a legal procedure, but I thought it was one one of the greatest, you know, schemed up plays that there ever were. Yeah.
Yeah, it really was.

Speaker 1 What's the best throw you've ever made? We'll put it on a clip and we'll be like, Brian Hoyer was different. We'll do, we'll do one of those like Twitter videos.

Speaker 1 Be like, fucking Brian Hoyer highlights.

Speaker 1 Let me think.

Speaker 13 There was a few throws when I played in Chicago that were good. There was one I threw to Cam Meredith.
I mean, I don't know if you remember him. Yeah.

Speaker 13 And it was against Dallas, and he ran like the shake route, and it was like a high nap. We call it nap, like like a back shoulder throw in the middle of the field.

Speaker 13 And it was more like, I thought like, wow, what a route by this guy. I'm going to start throwing him the ball a lot more.

Speaker 13 There were some ones in Cleveland where I rolled out left and had a, you know, Kyle has that rollout program where you throw it back to the right.

Speaker 13 There was one I threw there to Jim Dre that was pretty good.

Speaker 13 You know, I don't know. I mean, it's, it's a weird thing.
Like when you're so like in the moment, I don't remember, I'd have to think back and like, man, each year, what did I do?

Speaker 13 I threw a Hail Mary for a touchdown in Houston. That was pretty cool.

Speaker 13 A few balls to DeAndre Hopkins there. I mean, sometimes the receiver makes the throw, you know? Yeah.

Speaker 1 So,

Speaker 13 you know, I've had a few.

Speaker 1 Was that against the Jaguars, the Hail Mary?

Speaker 13 It was against the Colts.

Speaker 1 Okay. Yeah, they've had a couple good Hail Marys down there.
Is there an art to throwing pass interference?

Speaker 1 Like, do quarterbacks think to themselves, I'll put a little extra air under it, the cornerbacks coming down out of position, and then boom, that's an easy 30 yards downfield.

Speaker 13 Definitely, I mean, there's definitely times where you go in and say, like, like here we have Devontae Adams.

Speaker 13 So kind of similar, like when I was in Houston with DeAndre Hopkins, like you just want to give him a chance to go up and touch the ball because you know if he can touch it, he's probably going to catch it.

Speaker 13 And if he can't, if he, they're not letting him touch it, then you're getting that 30 yards right there. Yeah.
No doubt. I mean, there was definitely, I don't know if it's a, it's an art.

Speaker 13 It's more like when you have a receiver that's that good, we always just say, just let him touch the ball somehow, some way. Don't overthrow him.
Don't underthrow him.

Speaker 13 Throw it to the point where he's going to go up and either he's going to catch it because they're that good or the DB is going to run through him and it's going to be 30 yards anyways.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we always say on this podcast,

Speaker 1 if you touch it, you can catch it. It's a fact.
It's a fact.

Speaker 1 All right. So I have one last question.
This has been awesome. We appreciate you joining us, Brian.

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Speaker 1 Bad memory, but it's not about that.

Speaker 1 Your Texans year where you went to the playoffs, when you clinched to go to the playoffs, did you even have like a second where you thought you weren't going to be playing at the first Saturday game that they just made the Texans game every year?

Speaker 1 Or were you like, all right, let's go.

Speaker 1 We know when this game's going to be played?

Speaker 13 Yeah, no, I mean, that was more like, man, like, this is exciting. I'm a starter.
I'm in the playoffs. Obviously, like you said, bad memory.

Speaker 13 It was probably the worst game I've ever played in my entire sporting career going back to like Little League.

Speaker 1 Oh, geez.

Speaker 13 And I was just thrilled to be playing

Speaker 13 in the playoffs.

Speaker 1 Were you awesome in Little League?

Speaker 13 I was pretty good. Yeah.
I mean, I think anybody who's made it to the NFL is probably like the best

Speaker 13 in every league that they've been in.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 13 That's probably just the way it goes yeah what was your best how many how many touchdowns is your best high school game uh definitely four i mean i remember i threw like a 90 98 yard touchdown pass in high school i mean i went to a pretty historic high school in cleveland so there's there's a lot of you know great players that have come out here i mentioned dave regone and and um you know i was up there with a lot of the records and stuff like that but you know for me it was always about winning a state championship which i never did as a starter and and my school's won 12 of them so i always feel like i left that place with a little bit of unfun unfinished business Yeah, but you're a Super Bowl champ.

Speaker 1 I would also like to find some old school Brian Hoare highlights from when you were like, I don't know, 12, 10 years old, maybe, like in Pop Warner football. I can find them.

Speaker 13 I'll hit my dad up, see if I can send them to you.

Speaker 1 Yeah, hit up packs?

Speaker 1 Brian Hoyer, Adrian Peterson, two best

Speaker 1 early high school highlights that we've ever seen we've ever seen. Yeah, one of which.

Speaker 13 You want to know, like, you talk about like, were you good in little league? Like, I used to be able to run past people, and I'm like one of the slowest guys on the team now.

Speaker 13 Like, that just shows you, like, when in little league, like, I was, like, running quarterback sweeps for 50-yard touchdowns.

Speaker 1 Now

Speaker 13 running like a five-flat.

Speaker 1 Yeah. And even the offensive linemen in the NFL, they're running like five, 5.040s, which is terrifying.
Yes. Yeah.
It's crazy.

Speaker 1 So my last question. You've had a great career.
Hopefully it extends as long as you want it to, but then you probably are at that stage where you're thinking about what you want to do next.

Speaker 1 It sounds like you'd probably be a good coach. Have you thought about getting into coaching?

Speaker 13 No.

Speaker 13 I just look at like the hours these guys put in and actually like while you're sitting here, like my two kids are sitting in here with me. Like I want want to be able to spend time with them.

Speaker 13 And so I'd rather do something like what you guys are doing than, than coach and just kind of use that knowledge and, and, um, you know, educate people. And it's funny.

Speaker 13 I, you know, I talked to Josh Drew and we talked, mentioned Jacoby Brissette. Like he and I kind of have this podcast idea that, you know, we've been kind of cooking up.

Speaker 13 And I think it'd be fun, you know, like I mentioned, how funny he is. And through all of our experiences, I mean, look, he's been a starter.
He's been a backup.

Speaker 13 And, and, you know, so I think we have something, you know, something there that we could work out too. But I, I, I think I could be a good coach.
I just don't really have the desire to do it.

Speaker 1 Well, a little tip for you if you get into podcasting. You probably don't realize this because you're an NFL quarterback, but a lot of sitting, a lot of sitting.
Yeah. Yeah.
We sit a lot.

Speaker 13 So you maybe get those like those treadmill desks or something. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I'm just saying, no, no, no, no, no.

Speaker 1 You got to sit and do nothing. So it's not for like.
Guys can't handle this type of rigorous lack of activity.

Speaker 13 It's definitely a change in

Speaker 13 direction.

Speaker 13 So it have to be a little bit of preparation.

Speaker 1 Our bodies have gotten so hard from not doing shit for the last seven years.

Speaker 1 It's a one-year game.

Speaker 13 It looks really comfortable, though.

Speaker 1 Yeah. It actually is very small.
And

Speaker 1 I bet you when you sit down and

Speaker 1 try to watch eight NFL games at the same time, it's not going to be easy. It's not easy.

Speaker 13 It's true. Trying to watch it all at the same time.
But you know, it's funny is like my wife, the drives are nuts, but like I actually love football.

Speaker 13 So like when I get home from our game, sometimes like I throw the Sunday night game on and I want to see who's playing because I actually enjoy watching it.

Speaker 13 And I feel like it's something that you can always learn from.

Speaker 13 Like, there's times where I'll see like a play that's being run and be like, okay, tomorrow I got to go check the coach's tape and see like how they did that. So, you know, I do love the sport.

Speaker 13 It's treated me really well. And I'm sure that whatever I do will have something to do with football.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I mean, we gave JJ Watt a warning when he retired. We said, you're not ready to watch all the football that we watch.
He was so excited to do it.

Speaker 1 It took two weeks of him watching football to be like, two big games. It's impossible to do.
This is very hard to do. It's like, thank you, JJ.
Yeah, it's not easy.

Speaker 13 I saw him tweeted that out. He said, you know, it's hard to watch eight games at once.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we're, and listen, we're around the same, I think you're 37. We're PFT and our book 38.

Speaker 1 Bounce back is not the same. Monday mornings are tough for me.
It's hard to get out of bed. I know what it's like to play in the league.

Speaker 1 My body feels like it's been a car crash every Sunday. It's like

Speaker 1 five slices of pizza and a Sunday and drink three root pieces. Yeah, every Monday morning, I'm like, how am I going to do this again? Then by Sunday, I'm like, all right, let's go.

Speaker 1 You take some shots on Sunday.

Speaker 13 By the time Thursday, Friday, Saturday rolls around, you're ready to go again.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we're man in the arena right now. Yeah, yeah.
All right. Well, Brian, thank you so much, man.
This has been really, really fun. So, yeah, we'd love to have you back on anytime.
So appreciate it.

Speaker 13 Sounds good. Thanks, guys.

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Speaker 1 Okay, we now welcome on Sam Howell from the Washington Commanders, very special guest. It is one question with the quarterback.

Speaker 1 We're not going going to do this every week, but we will do it when it pops up. We appreciate Sam joining us.
Sam, I think you know how this works. We all get one question.

Speaker 1 I actually have a second one from Hank, who's not here. He's golfing right now.
So one question with the quarterback with Sam Howell, Washington Commanders, starting quarterback 2-0.

Speaker 1 I'll start.

Speaker 1 My question is, when it comes to listening to what the media says, do you ever take into account people who are saying like, you suck, but they're doing it because they're talking from a place of hurt and lashing out about their own team sucking?

Speaker 1 Does that, does that, do you give that a pass if someone's like, oh, Sam Howell sucks, but really they're just in pain because their own team and own quarterback sucks? Hypothetically speaking.

Speaker 13 I mean, obviously, I don't pay too much attention to it.

Speaker 13 But I mean, everyone has an opinion. Everyone's entitled to their own opinion.

Speaker 13 There is a lot of people out there that are frustrated with their own teams and like to take it out on other teams. But I'm a fan too, so I understand it.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 But I don't pay much attention to it.

Speaker 13 Okay, all right, good.

Speaker 1 Yeah, because like it'd be crazy if people did that and just tried to lash out

Speaker 1 and said you suck, even though you don't suck. Hypothetically,

Speaker 1 if they were hurt just because they expected great things from their own quarterback, right? Hurt people hurt people. That's that's the saying, right?

Speaker 13 Yeah, no, I hear you.

Speaker 1 Who's your favorite team?

Speaker 1 The Bears are doing really well this year.

Speaker 13 Oh, they'll figure it out, man. Justin's a good player, man.
He'll figure it out.

Speaker 1 Okay, yeah. that's nice of you to say.
I've never said a bad word about you.

Speaker 1 Sam, my first question, it's not really, well, I'll just start with a statement. I love you.
Thank you. And then my actual question is:

Speaker 1 have you gotten to shake Josh Harris's hand yet?

Speaker 1 Because I saw the bad tape that went out on Monday Night Football earlier this season, and Joe Buck kind of entrapped him into a weird handshake where he just kind of like put his hand in Josh's chest.

Speaker 1 And of course, Josh is a nice guy, so he's going to shake his hand.

Speaker 13 But from a guy that I assume you've shaken his hand can you tell us what his actual handshake is like oh it's great it's exactly what you'd expect he's he's a great dude man yeah i've been around a few times um no that clip was funny man they they did him dirty with that one yeah but he's a good man um he comes around a lot um which uh is cool for us to see we see the owner all the time and he's in the locker room after games at every single game he's at every game um so it's just it's a fun time to be a part of his organization but josh man mr harris has been awesome um so it's just it's an exciting time to be a part of this franchise.

Speaker 1 I agree, I agree. Yes, all right, Jake.

Speaker 5 Hey, Sam, Jake Marsh, part of my Take Podcast. Thank you for joining us today.
Uh, so your documented diet has gone viral.

Speaker 5 You've never had a burger or steak, so I'm not going to ask you again about that.

Speaker 5 I am going to ask you, what will it take in terms of football success this season for us to get you to have a burger or steak?

Speaker 1 Oh, good question, Jake.

Speaker 13 That's a great question. Great question.

Speaker 13 If we win the Super Bowl, I'll have a steak.

Speaker 1 Yeah, with us. With us.

Speaker 1 We'll dine on

Speaker 1 steak together. Medium rare plus.

Speaker 13 Y'all have to take me to the best steak in the world, wherever y'all think the best, whoever has the best steak in the world. That's where we'll go.
Okay.

Speaker 1 South America. Yeah, we'll go to Argentina together.

Speaker 1 That's a long trip for a Super Bowl.

Speaker 13 Then when I take one bite for y'all and I don't like it, y'all can't be mad.

Speaker 1 Okay, that's fine. That's fine.
You will like it.

Speaker 1 You'll love it. You'll love it.

Speaker 1 Max.

Speaker 7 Hey, Sam. Max here, producer of part of my take podcast.

Speaker 7 I know you're not playing the Eagles this week, but I just want to know if you've seen any tape on Jalen Carter and if you're scared.

Speaker 13 Yeah, the tape hasn't come up on the Eagles yet.

Speaker 13 It's coming up. I'm not even sure when we play the Eagles.

Speaker 13 Yeah, man, I'm sure he's doing a good job. He's a heck of a player.

Speaker 13 So I'm excited for the matchup.

Speaker 1 Okay, great. That's a great answer.

Speaker 1 That was a dirty question by Max. That was a dirty question.
Max is supposed to be a question about Sam or the Commanders, not about yours. That's inner division.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you got to be right. Right on top of it.
All right. Last question is from Hank.
This is Hank's question, not me. This is Hank.

Speaker 1 In 2021, Big Cat tweeted, I'm a Sam Howell guy. I love him with that said weight question mark because you had a picture that your face looked really fat.

Speaker 1 And then you replied, I'm a Big Cat guy. I love him with that said weight.

Speaker 1 Do you think that Big Cat actually is fat? That was kind of mean of you.

Speaker 13 Well, does Big Cat think that I'm fat?

Speaker 1 That picture, yes, you looked fat.

Speaker 1 It was just a bad angle. Like, bad angles happen.

Speaker 13 Yeah. Well, there have been some bad angles of you, or you do look kind of fat as well.

Speaker 1 Okay. All right, fair.
This is Hank's question, by the way. That's look at that was a bad picture.
That's a good-looking guy. Hey, no, you are a very good-looking guy.

Speaker 13 What's funny is like, I was literally just telling Sean, our media guy here, just I was telling him about that interaction on Twitter.

Speaker 1 I was like, Yeah, they're definitely going to bring that up. It was

Speaker 1 rarely am I surprised with

Speaker 1 something coming back at me and like, you know backfiring because i usually can sense like i'll i'll lob it up so that i it can backfire on purpose that one i was like fuck he's right that's that's shocking for you to be for you to be like wow his face looks kind of fat in this picture and not expect yeah that's like wow this guy looks kind of short in this picture yeah i was i'm a big sam howell guy i loved watching you at unc that's a face

Speaker 1 it's a face designed to absorb contact yeah yeah that was a bad picture though you have to admit like i think it was maybe the

Speaker 13 i don't remember the picture but it might have been bad yeah yeah i've worked on my i've worked on on my figure since then.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you got a nice jawline right now. All right, do you have one question for us?

Speaker 1 I do. Okay.
Yeah, I do.

Speaker 13 If y'all could play any position on any team in sports, what position and what team would it be?

Speaker 1 Well, that's a good question. I would like to be, I've said this before, but I would like to be the Kentucky Derby winning horse.

Speaker 1 Wow. Yeah, it would be awesome because you just, you run one race and then you don't have to work ever again.
And then the rest of your life, you're just having sex.

Speaker 13 I will say when I thought of this question, question, I was not expecting that response. Yeah.

Speaker 1 It'd be good.

Speaker 1 I shouldn't expect it. I would like to be maybe a middle reliever for like the San Diego Padres.
That seems like a pretty good life. Like no media scrutiny.

Speaker 13 A great life. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Just hang out, pitch every few days, play a lot of golf. Like your team probably is going to suck.
Who cares? You're doing your job. That feels like a good spot to be in.
Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Certainly not bad.

Speaker 13 Certainly not a bad place to be.

Speaker 1 Guaranteed contract. Not bad.
Right. Right.
Jake?

Speaker 5 Yeah, in my childhood, it was a shortstop for the New York Yankees.

Speaker 1 Ooh, a lot of pressure. Yeah, too much pressure.
You can handle it. That's too much pressure.
Yeah, but I can feel Jeter's shoes. Oh, okay.
Yeah. I don't think so.
Max?

Speaker 7 Pinch hitter that comes in and tries to hit bombs.

Speaker 1 That was always my life goal. Nice.
Wait, what about you, Sam?

Speaker 1 Me? Yeah.

Speaker 13 Yeah, I had to say the starting quarterback for the Washington.

Speaker 1 Okay, okay, so I saw you guys.

Speaker 1 I was afraid. I was very afraid.

Speaker 13 Or a professional, or a professional golfer.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that was Hank's answer, actually. So you covered that one.
Yeah. He absolutely.

Speaker 1 All right. Well, Sam, thank you so much.
Best of luck rest of the season. Hopefully, we see you.
We'll get you back on for a longer interview. But thanks for doing one question with the quarterback.

Speaker 1 It's pretty fun, right?

Speaker 13 Yeah, for sure. No, I appreciate you guys having me out.
Let's do it again.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we'll see you after we win the Super Bowl. Left hand up, Sam? Yeah, we're going to get a left hand up.
We're going to go to South America. There we go.
I didn't know. Yeah, left hand up.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 1 What's up, guys? It's Big Cat here, making my Irish entrance with proper number 12 Irish whiskey. How do you make an Irish entrance? You ask?

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Speaker 1 So get out there and make your Irish entrance. Anything else just wouldn't be proper.
Also, I will give you my credit card. We need to go get more Snickers ice cream.
I know.

Speaker 1 I noticed we were out during NFL Sunday. I like it.
Did you take like three boxes home? I did take two boxes home. Yes.
They're so good. And I ate them at home.

Speaker 1 And my kids had some too, but I ate most of it. Yeah, I've been eating a lot of Uncrustables, too.
Oh, the Uncrustables. So good.

Speaker 1 It's really the perfect meal. An Uncrustables.
It's too small. No, you have one as a smaller bit.
No, Jake, here's what you do. You get two Uncrustables.
You have both of them.

Speaker 1 Put some peanut butter and jelly in between the two. Yeah, you can make an Uncrustables Uncrustable.

Speaker 7 Maybe put a Snickers bar in the Uncrustable.

Speaker 1 No, that's dessert. Yeah, that's good.
Yeah, we need more Snickers bars either way. But yeah, today I did.
Good point. Good point, Max.
I did get. I did.
You know what else is good?

Speaker 1 Yeah, Snickers. Thank you to Snickers.
We need more Snickers. Ice cream.
I love it.

Speaker 1 Okay. This took this new girl out on a date and got all-inclusive at the Cardinals game.
Clearly, flexing.

Speaker 1 Is that a flexing? It really depends on what you're talking about.

Speaker 1 St. Louis.
I think both aren't a flex. Yeah, neither one.
I think that's the opposite of a flex, right? Yeah. All-inclusive.
Like,

Speaker 1 that's a lot of farts. Yeah.
You're going to fart a lot. No, babe, these hot dogs are free.
No, yeah, yeah, no, no. The best part is you can just keep going back for the chicken fingers.

Speaker 1 No, you don't have to tip. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Well, it's good illusion. She was right behind me in the buffet line, and after two full plates of nachos, I couldn't control my fart.

Speaker 1 So it took out half the line, including the girl behind me, who was 5-1.

Speaker 1 It's the truth, dude. If you go to all-inclusive for the baseball game, it's fart city.
That's all you're going to do for the rest of the day.

Speaker 1 You just eat so many things. Wait, what is it? What do they mean? It took out a girl who was 5'1?

Speaker 1 He's probably a tall guy, so he's probably

Speaker 1 right at ass level. Yeah, ass to face.

Speaker 1 He said he blamed it on the kid that was standing in front of him. Oh, okay.
Smart. But we know it was you.
Also, just blame it on the buffet. The guy in front of him was definitely fat, too.

Speaker 1 Yeah, dude. You always blame it on the fat guy.
Yeah, he always just points to the fat guy. But yeah, these,

Speaker 1 when you do the all-you-can-eat at a baseball game, oh, my God. By the third inning, I'm a toxic wasteland.

Speaker 1 It rules, though. And then the dessert cart comes.

Speaker 1 Maron.

Speaker 1 Jake from Blacksburg. Oh, hey, Jake.
I was serving food to an old family friend who was eating with his elderly blind dad.

Speaker 1 This already sounds like a movie.

Speaker 1 As I was saying bye, B-U-Y, to them, I attempted to shake the father's hand. Did you just spelling shame him?

Speaker 1 Well, he's trying to trip me up.

Speaker 1 By and by? Yeah. All right.
How would you have pronounced it if it was B-Y-E?

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 1 I tended to shake the father's hand just out of habit. And as I was holding my hand in front of him while he was just staring into blank

Speaker 10 space, whoa,

Speaker 1 as I pulled my hand back up, he sensed it and raised his hand up. And I left him hanging.
Oh, completely embarrassed and continued to avoid them to this day.

Speaker 1 That's like the old story of Shaq and Stevie Wonder. When they met each other, I think Shaq waved at him.
Yeah. Stevie Wonder, I think, sensed it and waved back.
I think that's these things happen.

Speaker 1 You just got to rectify it as fast as possible. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 I've had those moments before where it's like, yeah, you just, you, you make a mistake. You say something to a blind person.
You're like, wait, shit, that was stupid.

Speaker 1 It's not the first time they've heard that. No, definitely not.

Speaker 1 Oh.

Speaker 1 This is tough. Okay.

Speaker 1 Been dating my girlfriend for a few months now, and Saturday went to our first wedding together. She was the maid of honor, and I was the plus one.

Speaker 1 After slugging multiple cocktails when I'm more of a beer guy, I ran into the bride's grandmother and told her how great the wedding was and how much they looked alike.

Speaker 1 I could tell right away you were her grandmother. Her response, I'm not her grandmother.
It was actually her mom. Oh,

Speaker 1 no.

Speaker 1 Oh, no.

Speaker 1 That is so bad. You should just leave.
You need to leave. Yeah, you got to break up.
It's not going to work. You got to change your phone.
She's going to change your address.

Speaker 1 She's going to trench your social security. She's going to sabotage you.
She's going to be the mother-in-law from hell. Yeah, you need a new life.
You need everything. No, well,

Speaker 1 it's not his girlfriend's mother.

Speaker 1 Oh, that's right. It's a girlfriend's best friend's mother.
Yeah, that's right. But still, that is, because that is, that woman is definitely in your girlfriend's life in some capacity.

Speaker 1 You just ruined her wedding. Ruined her wedding.
Daughter's wedding. Ruined her life.
You should have tried to hit on her afterwards. That was your only hope.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you should have been like, I'm actually, I said grandmother because I'm into grandmother. I'm like PFT.
I'm into grandmother. You just nagged the shit out of her.
Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 That is, that's one of those ones, too.

Speaker 1 30 years from now, it will randomly just pop in your head. Like, remember, I said that.
Yeah, and you're going to cringe. You're going to turn red.
Oh,

Speaker 1 man.

Speaker 1 So she wasn't that hot.

Speaker 1 Or very hot. Sounds like she was hot.
Well, no, I mean, she was hot. Maybe hot, but old.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.
That's okay.

Speaker 1 Maybe, you know what, get her a gift card to like a plastic surgeon. That'll be nice.
Yeah, get those crows' feet out. Last one.

Speaker 1 I was on a work call with my camera off and thought my mic was muted until I realized it wasn't. I was farting the whole time.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 I got a couple in, and then as I was scrolling on my phone, I noticed a pause, and my boss asked, who was making the fart noises?

Speaker 1 I didn't say a word and muted my mic right away. Do you think people know it was me? So the camera to me isn't the worst part.
It's the microphone that you're worried about, right?

Speaker 1 Yeah, but the camera could be bad because you're just lifting your leg and you maybe even sniffing it. You should have just gone like started making fart and like, yeah.
Me, sorry.

Speaker 1 I think that, I think that's hilarious, so I'm sorry. I realize now I can't do that.
I'm so afraid of this that I like, I triple check every time. Yeah.

Speaker 1 When you're on a Zoom call, you don't want to get tubined. No.
It's the worst thing to happen. Just put a piece of duct tape over your video camera on your phone.
Yeah, that's a tough one.

Speaker 1 Although everyone farts. Come on.
It's just guys. Guys being dudes.

Speaker 1 That was you, Hank, that happened to?

Speaker 1 No? Oh, I thought it was your jumbo.

Speaker 1 Because you take so many work calls. So I thought maybe.

Speaker 1 Something you want to tell us? You ever farted on a work call before, Hank?

Speaker 1 Yeah, obviously. Hmm.
You ever farted on a work call and then submit the time you farted on a work call to a podcast? No,

Speaker 1 what's going on?

Speaker 1 I noticed that you read that one the cleanest of all. Yeah.
It almost looks like it was from memory, yeah.

Speaker 1 You think Dave's doing work halls? Like, I don't know what that is. Yeah, I think it's maybe E-Dog.
You don't have a boss? Big E? I mean,

Speaker 1 Dave is my boss, but he's not doing work calls.

Speaker 1 Well, not when you're farting in him. He doesn't want to show up to that.

Speaker 1 I fart all the time.

Speaker 1 I know.

Speaker 1 No, I should have more shame

Speaker 1 about farting than I do. I agree.
Like, when I'm around you guys, I just don't care. Oh, that's just us.

Speaker 1 That's just love.

Speaker 1 It's usually just an improvement in the smell in the room if somebody farts yeah true how bad the room usually smells yeah whenever someone's like oh i wonder what that room smells like worse it's always bad it's worse than you it's bad uh okay

Speaker 1 friday what memes

Speaker 1 memes laughing in your face friday we will do uh

Speaker 1 the nfl preview week three and we also have our good friend brooks on because the boys are playing a little golf on thursday playing in the pro-am playing in the little pro-am I am nervous.

Speaker 1 I don't know what the spectator situation is going to be like

Speaker 1 at all? Yeah. Good, because we would probably send people to the hospital.
Yeah, for sure. With our bad shots.
For sure, for sure. Do we have to walk? Yeah.

Speaker 1 It'd be good exercise.

Speaker 1 Who's going to caddy for us? Good question. Who's caddy? Do we have caddies? We should get caddies.
If we don't have caddies, I'm just only going to bring it. Well, actually, no.

Speaker 1 I'm all already driving. I mean, you guys must have seen when you filled out the thing, right? Stop it with a paperwork.

Speaker 1 Corporate Hank and his farts. When I filled that out, it asked, Are you bringing your own caddy, which would you would assume means they're providing them? Oh, okay.
Okay, good.

Speaker 1 Very good. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah. Hopefully.

Speaker 1 You're going to have to caddy for us, Hank,

Speaker 1 if there's no caddy. All three bags?

Speaker 1 No, we'll consolidate. Me and PFT will consolidate.
We'll be good guys. Bring Jerry.
Yeah, well, no, we'll put it all in. We're all in the rolling mode.

Speaker 1 We should actually have Jerry be our caddy. He's the worst caddy.
Yeah, no, he couldn't make it. Yeah, that would be awesome.
Go watch the Ryder Cup. Yeah, go watch the Ryder Cup.
Plug God.

Speaker 1 Okay, numbers. Three.

Speaker 5 18.

Speaker 1 You go

Speaker 1 20. 99.
I'll go 69.

Speaker 1 One.

Speaker 1 Why are you saying yes? You guys get it, baby. I never get one.
I didn't. 68.
Oh,

Speaker 1 damn it. All right.
See everyone on Friday.

Speaker 1 Love you guys.

Speaker 1 Today is a moment

Speaker 1 to find you shy away.

Speaker 1 Though I'll be coming for your love again.

Speaker 1 Take on me.

Speaker 1 Take

Speaker 1 me.

Speaker 1 Take on me.

Speaker 1 I'll be ego

Speaker 1 that I take on

Speaker 1 Saddam needless to say

Speaker 1 I hold it

Speaker 1 for me still a little way

Speaker 1 Slowly learning that life is okay

Speaker 1 Say after me

Speaker 1 It's no better to be safe than sorry

Speaker 1 All the things that you say,

Speaker 1 though, were just to pay my worries away.

Speaker 1 You're all things I've got to remember. You're shy and I wait.

Speaker 1 I'll be coming for you anyway.

Speaker 1 Take

Speaker 1 on

Speaker 1 me.

Speaker 1 Take on me. Take

Speaker 1 me

Speaker 1 up.

Speaker 1 Take on me. I

Speaker 1 take

Speaker 1 on

Speaker 1 to take

Speaker 1 on

Speaker 1 me.

Speaker 1 Take on me. Take

Speaker 1 me

Speaker 1 Take only

Speaker 1 me

Speaker 1 Take on me

Speaker 1 on

Speaker 1 me

Speaker 1 Take only

Speaker 1 take

Speaker 1 me

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Speaker 1 Take on me

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