CFB Preview With Andy Staples, Mt Rushmore Of Ass Kickings, Shohei Hurt And Barstool 20th Anniversary Awards

Speaker 1 Hey, pardon my take, listeners. You can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube.
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Speaker 1 On today's part of my take, we have our good friend Andy Staples on the show because college football is back.

Speaker 1 Week zero coming up. on Saturday.
We're going to talk about the entire college football landscape with him. Some dark horse picks to win the national title.
Some picks for Saturday. Great interview.

Speaker 1 Always great to have college football back. We have the Mount Rushmore of ass kickings.
This is a good one. This is a good Mount Rushmore to clean up the trilogies.

Speaker 1 We're going to be, this is a good Mount Rushmore. So get excited for that.
We have, we're going to talk some sports.

Speaker 1 We have, we're going to maybe recap a little of the barstool 20th anniversary awards. We were still in Boston after the awards last night.

Speaker 1 And then we have Fire Fest of the Week sending you into the weekend. And we're so goddamn close to the NFL being back as well.

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Speaker 1 Okay,

Speaker 1 let's go.

Speaker 1 Now in the street, there is violence.

Speaker 1 And I know

Speaker 1 the weapon. to be done.

Speaker 1 No place behind a lot of washing.

Speaker 1 And then I can't blame all of the sounds. Oh, no, we're gonna rock it down to Elite Trick Avenue.

Speaker 1 And then we'll take it higher.

Speaker 1 Oh, we're gonna rock it down to Elite Trick IV. It's part of my take.
Isn't it by Marshal Sports?

Speaker 1 Welcome to part of my take. Today is Friday, August 25th, and Shohei Otani is hurt again.

Speaker 8 Yeah, it's a tough day.

Speaker 1 Sucks.

Speaker 8 You know what? I was about to say tough day for Angels fans. Tough day for baseball.
Yeah. For the sport, for the game.
I feel bad for the game.

Speaker 1 I actually feel worse for Shohei Otani.

Speaker 8 Yeah, he's probably missing out on a few million dollars.

Speaker 1 And there's word, there's the idea that maybe he will stop pitching because this is his second injury. He had Tommy John in 2018.
Now he's

Speaker 1 UCL.

Speaker 1 That would suck. That would suck a lot.
And that would cost him a lot of money.

Speaker 8 It would cost him a ton. He was set to make a shit fuckload of money in free agency.
Now he's just going to make a fuckload of money probably.

Speaker 8 It would be very funny, though, if the Mets signed him and then he just pulled a degrom and just like every year in June had to get shut down. Yes.
But as a batter, he can still go out there and play.

Speaker 8 In fact, he asked to play in today's game. Like the second they told him he had an elbow injury.
He's like, I can still bat, though.

Speaker 8 Yeah, they're like, no, just please take it easy on yourself. Chill out for a little bit.
I have an idea. This guy can do everything.
Why doesn't he just try to pitch left-handed?

Speaker 8 I bet you Shohei could pitch left-handed.

Speaker 1 I don't disagree. I also have another idea.
Why doesn't Shohei Otani become the best closer in the game?

Speaker 8 So, yes, Smoltz. I was thinking about that.
I went up, looked up Smoltz's history.

Speaker 8 He was a great pitcher for the Braves, moved into the closing role, and then dominated for a few years, then came back and started. he would be a lights-out closer.

Speaker 1 A lot of closers and relief pitchers are guys who just couldn't start. Yeah.
So, and I'm not, obviously, Shoy Otani can start, but he can strike guys out.

Speaker 1 Imagine if he was just like DHing every day and then closing games. Yeah.
That would rule.

Speaker 1 Did you guys, did you guys hear about Ben Verlander? No.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he heard about Shoy Otani, thought he would puke. So

Speaker 8 that makes me want to puke.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he said, oh my God, Shoe Otani has has a torn UCL. I'm going to throw up.

Speaker 1 And then he said,

Speaker 1 let's see. He also followed up with, no, for those asking, I am not okay.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 So he's really going through it. He's the one who really I feel worse for.
He also posted a picture of Shohei standing on second base in the ninth inning last night.

Speaker 1 This picture is so much sadder now that we know that Shohei Otani knew he tore his UCL at this point.

Speaker 8 Yeah, apparently the Angels might share some of the blame in this because he's been dealing with some

Speaker 8 right-hand issues.

Speaker 1 Oh, you're saying the Angels aren't a well-run organization?

Speaker 8 Well, at least they still have Mike Trout and he's healthy. But Otani has apparently, I did a deep dive on this.

Speaker 8 There are some Redditors out there that have posted that Otani for the last month or so has been reaching across his body to give high fives with his left hand

Speaker 8 as opposed to his right hand. And people are like, I hope he's okay.
Turns out he's not okay.

Speaker 8 The UCL, it

Speaker 8 sounds like another Tommy John in the future. And sometimes guys come back throwing harder from Tommy John, but then I don't know what happens if you have two Tommy Johns.
Yeah. There's a Tommy's John

Speaker 1 Attorney's John John. I think it gets you even stronger.
Henry Rohngartner.

Speaker 8 I might just get preemptive Tommy John.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's smart. Also, we heard from our good friend Karabas, who was at the Barstool Awards last night.
He said, genuinely nauseous over the show, Heyo, Tommy injury news.

Speaker 8 But he's not, he didn't puke. He just felt like he wasn't.

Speaker 1 He just was genuinely nauseous. Is he okay? Now,

Speaker 1 we are all, we've definitely tweeted like this after an injury, but when it's

Speaker 1 something that we're all bummed about, we love watching Shohei Otani play. He's having one of the best seasons ever.

Speaker 1 But yeah, I didn't get nauseous or want to puke after this one, personally.

Speaker 8 I did, but that was just because I ate like 20 chicken wings last night. Yeah.
I think it was unrelated. Yeah.
But

Speaker 1 we could assign that to Shohei.

Speaker 8 Yeah, I wanted to puke when I found out. That's actually not a lie to say I felt like puking when I heard the Shohei Otani news had nothing to do with the nine Coors Lights and 20 Buffalo Wings.

Speaker 1 I actually want to puke right now, and that has nothing to do with other than the fact that we're in a room that's like 300 degrees. So maybe that's also Shohei.

Speaker 1 Maybe we all just haven't found our inner Ben Verlander or Jared Karabis and really felt where we want, like where this puke is coming from. It's Shohei.

Speaker 8 I wanted to puke earlier when I heard Hank yawn. Yeah.
And also Shohei.

Speaker 1 Oh, man. We were driving up to Boston from New York on Tuesday, and Brandon Walker heard his first Hank yawn.
He whipped his head around so hard from the front seat. It was like he had seen a UFO.

Speaker 1 They didn't say anything. I saw his head.
He just goes, yeah.

Speaker 1 I was like,

Speaker 8 I do that every time I hear it. It never loses its luster for me.
It's still genuinely shocking that that noise comes out of that man's mouth. Yes.

Speaker 3 All right, so where does Shohei go?

Speaker 8 Mets. Goes to the Mets and then does not live up to the contract.
Okay.

Speaker 1 I feel like he might just stay at the Angels. Lost.
Although if they fucked him up, if they fucked his injury up, maybe it's just Dodgers so he doesn't have to move. Vegas.
Vegas.

Speaker 1 Oh, you're a John Fisher guy? Fuck you. You're a scumbag, too.

Speaker 1 What?

Speaker 8 What? I said it. I don't think John Fisher would pay Shohei Otani.

Speaker 1 No, he did say that once they get a new stadium. He's going to start spending.

Speaker 1 We'll see.

Speaker 8 That's going to be sticker shock. That's something really, that's such a future you problem.
It's like, man,

Speaker 8 once March Madness is over, I'm going on such a diet. I'm going to have a great body for the summertime.
No, he's not going to be able to write those big checks. It's not in his DNA.

Speaker 1 This football season, I'm going to be diligent about my gambling, and

Speaker 1 I'm going to win. Yeah.
Less games. I'm going to do it.

Speaker 8 I'm going to sprinkle in some unders this year.

Speaker 1 And then I look on week zero. I have every single game, and half of them aren't even real games.

Speaker 8 It is week zero. It is week zero.
We made it. We made it.
I'm excited to hopefully see how green the grass is in Ireland for the Notre Dame game. That's all I'm looking forward to in that game.

Speaker 1 Yes. Yes.

Speaker 1 I'm very excited for week zero, just live football. So, yeah, shout out to Shohei.
You're going to still make a lot of money but not as much and shout out anyone who's dealing with uh nausea diarrhea

Speaker 1 uh

Speaker 1 upset stomach premature ejaculation premature ejaculation all these things that might be related to shohei otani's injury in some form hank was that look for i mean me it was just what he said

Speaker 1 a non-breaking moves breaking moves okay breaking moves non-breaking moves breaking moves

Speaker 1 uh isaiah simmons is being traded from the cardinals to the Giants for a seventh-round pick. Huge, massive, and that shifts.

Speaker 8 That shifts the entire balance of power in the NFC.

Speaker 1 Damn. Giants loading up.

Speaker 8 Giants super team?

Speaker 1 Super team.

Speaker 1 Isaiah Simmons? Watch this. Holy shit.

Speaker 8 Aaron Rodgers made one of his wide receivers retire. Yeah.
So that's interesting.

Speaker 1 That was Corey Davis, Western Michigan great, Mac great.

Speaker 8 Yeah, we saw him in the Mac championship game that one time. Yep.

Speaker 1 He's just stepping away from football or officially retiring?

Speaker 8 He said stepping away from the game. So who knows what that means?

Speaker 1 Well, it probably means you can't fire me. I quit because he might not have made the roster.
I feel like you don't step away if you're going to make the roster, right? You don't go through camp. Yeah.

Speaker 1 You're not trying to play. Right.
But then the minute you see, like, oh, I might not, I might get cut here. Right.

Speaker 8 So he told Robert Salah that he was going to step away and leave camp for a couple days.

Speaker 8 Salah said he's dealing with personal issues, and then he dropped out on Instagram that he was walking away from the game. So he's saying that he could still come back.

Speaker 8 He's not closing the door, I don't think. But he didn't get cut.
He did not get cut. He did not get cut.

Speaker 1 Print it, write it. He did not get cut.

Speaker 5 Did not get cut.

Speaker 1 If he did get cut, the Jets would save $10 million.

Speaker 1 Oh, that's interesting. So he was definitely going to get cut.

Speaker 1 It was a possibility. He's been trying for that.

Speaker 8 They were going to have to restructure his contract for sure.

Speaker 1 I mean, he's very good. But that, I mean, that's a great move by him.

Speaker 1 Was he very good? I liked him.

Speaker 1 Zach Wilson threw it in injuries so very seems like the wrong he was he was not very good for the jets he was he was a decent threat yeah i would call him a decent threat he was a beast in the mac so do you hate him he was a first-round play yeah i think he went like fifth overall

Speaker 1 you guys

Speaker 1 but knowing that it seems like he might have been on the bubble and again i i that's a great move by him even like i never got cut

Speaker 1 you do you think he was going to get cut uh i don't think so oh even the 10 million even with the 10 million What was the wide receiver what on the depth chart?

Speaker 1 I believe three.

Speaker 1 Oh, so maybe not. Yeah.
Okay.

Speaker 1 It's just, yeah.

Speaker 1 It's all right. Now they got Randall Cobb.
32-year-old Randall Cobb. 32-year-old Randall Cobb just getting into his prime.
Speaking of roster moves,

Speaker 1 maybe the saddest tweet ever was the 49ers alerting everyone that Sam Darnold named QB2. Yep.
I don't remember the last time that's happened. Well, where they just, they're like

Speaker 1 big announcement, QB2, Sam Darnold.

Speaker 8 It's more about what they didn't say with that. Right.
And that's who the QB3 is going to be. Trey Lance.
Trey Lance. So Trey Lance, Trey Lance should step away.

Speaker 1 Trey Lance.

Speaker 1 Trey Lance should step away and then try to find a way to wind up in Kansas City and play for Andy Reid and then become great.

Speaker 8 It's funny because if he was on any other team, we'd be like, man, imagine Trey Lance and Kyle Shanahan's system. Yeah.
It'd be pretty sweet. Yeah.

Speaker 8 We saw it, and he had like a couple moments where he looked competent. But yeah,

Speaker 8 it is really good for John Lynch that he ended up striking gold with Brock Purdy because giving up three first-round picks to trade up to get Trey Lance would not look good for him.

Speaker 1 Trey Lance, yeah,

Speaker 1 I mean, we'll see what the rest of his career looks like. But right now, he's in pretty good conversation for bus situation because that was a big trade.
And who else went in that draft?

Speaker 8 That was Justin Fields. Justin Fields, Mac Jones.

Speaker 1 Mac Jones, Justin Fields.

Speaker 1 Trevor Lawrence went first.

Speaker 1 Zach Wilson already was taken.

Speaker 1 Wow. This is like the draft with Marino and Elway and all those guys.

Speaker 8 Yeah, I mean, the Jets can always say, at least we didn't take Trey Lance.

Speaker 1 Yeah, at least we didn't take Trey Lance. Yeah,

Speaker 1 that's a tough one to trade up and

Speaker 1 take Trey Lance at three.

Speaker 8 So Trey Lance,

Speaker 8 he played, what, 16 games in college? He had that one season where he was just lights out, didn't throw an interception, I don't think.

Speaker 1 And then COVID year, he played one game.

Speaker 8 Yeah, so

Speaker 8 ever since he got beaten up by JMU in in the national championship game, Trey Lance has not been the same quarterback. Yeah.
He might have won that game, but we also knocked the shit out of him.

Speaker 1 He started 17 games total in college, 16 and then the one COVID year game.

Speaker 8 Not a big sample size.

Speaker 1 No, not a huge sample size. But a reclamation.

Speaker 1 Everyone knows this.

Speaker 1 If you were drafted high, I just assume that you're still good. The draft guys couldn't be that wrong.
Yeah. Different system.
He'll be great.

Speaker 8 We just haven't seen enough yet. Right, exactly.
So give him some time.

Speaker 1 I will never give up on a top 10 draft pick.

Speaker 8 Nor should you.

Speaker 3 Unless it was Corey Davis.

Speaker 8 Was he top 10? I think so. I think he was number five overall.
Yeah. We got Jonathan Taylor, the Jonathan Taylor sweepstakes.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 8 Rumored that the Birds are interested in him. And I mean, if the Eagles get Jonathan Taylor on top of everything that they have already, easy Super Bowl.

Speaker 1 Easy.

Speaker 8 Not a doubt in my mind.

Speaker 1 Proud running game. Who's your running backs right now?

Speaker 1 DeAndre Swift. So it'd be

Speaker 8 It would be Taylor Swift Penny in their backfield.

Speaker 1 That would be the best thing. And Kenneth Gainwell.
Wait, say it all again? Rashad Penny. Rashad Penny.
Kenny Gainwell. Kenny Gainwell.
I like Kenny Gainwell. Yeah, I like Gainwell.
He's good.

Speaker 1 I like our running back room.

Speaker 1 I think this is all rumors. I don't think we're going to.
Would you say that if they get Jonathan Taylor dream team?

Speaker 8 No. Super team.
Super team. Super dream team.
No.

Speaker 1 No, that's Jets. That's Jets vibes this year for sure.

Speaker 1 Wow.

Speaker 8 I did watch Hard Knocks, and goddammit,

Speaker 8 I'm so in on the Jets. Dude, I'm so in on them.
Go watch the ghost video.

Speaker 1 It's out now on PM TV. Me ghost hunting at Jerry's house.

Speaker 1 I placed $10,000 on the Jets to win the Super Bowl because the ghost told me to.

Speaker 1 Hard Knocks shouldn't, they shouldn't have Final Cut. The team shouldn't have Final Cut.
It's bullshit. It's too, it's too.
It's just a suck fest.

Speaker 3 It is a suck fest.

Speaker 8 That's what I'm saying. Like, they've fully suckered me in now.
I'm fully believing in the Jets because of Hard Knocks.

Speaker 1 And they're showing you exactly what you want to see. Yeah.
Oh, I know that.

Speaker 8 I'm fully aware when I'm watching it. Like, this is a press release for the New York Jets.
Bullshit. I'm like, these receivers are going to have monster years.

Speaker 1 Minus Corey Davis.

Speaker 8 Minus Corey Davis. Well, more to go around for everybody else.

Speaker 1 That's true. That's true.

Speaker 1 All right. What else we got going on?

Speaker 8 Garrett Wilson, 2,000 yards this year.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Easy.
2,000. Speed.
The Chiclets guys interviewed Tuca. Oh, yeah.
Let's hear his stories.

Speaker 1 They're going to talk about. Well, actually, why don't you interview us

Speaker 8 as we're Tuca?

Speaker 1 I'll be Tuca. So there's Tuca Raska on the show.
We'll both be Tuca. Any pasta stories?

Speaker 1 I like Capatelli. Yeah, I was going to say I like the vodka, a la vodka.
Tell me about the 2011 cup parties.

Speaker 8 Oh, it was a movie. Dude, Marshi was crazy.
It was a fucking movie. Cue the duck boats, baby.

Speaker 1 Did you see that tab we had? Snuts. Early days of Sagan.

Speaker 1 Beast. Yeah, I mean, monster.

Speaker 8 I've never seen a guy like that.

Speaker 1 I've seen a lot of guys. I'll tell you what.
One word, beauty.

Speaker 1 Shitting himself in playoffs.

Speaker 1 Well, that happens.

Speaker 8 Yeah, listen, if you're a goalie, sometimes the best defense you can have is just shit yourself and no one wants to go near you.

Speaker 1 I ate too much pasta that day. Just Olympics.
Olympics are cool.

Speaker 8 You get to represent your country.

Speaker 1 Yeah, kind of a waste of money.

Speaker 8 Although, if you smoke weed, you should not be throwing the javelin. It could be very dangerous.
Yep.

Speaker 1 All right, sorry, Chickles fans, but

Speaker 1 I guess tune in no way. So

Speaker 8 we found this index card that has their questions that they ask them. Whose questions do you think these are?

Speaker 3 It's got to be Biz.

Speaker 8 You think think that's Biz? It looks like Biz's handwriting. Yeah, it's got to be Biz.
And then there's a bunch of stuff.

Speaker 1 Because I don't think, and I say that because I don't think Wit does questions.

Speaker 8 Yeah, he just talks.

Speaker 1 I think because he can just go off the dome.

Speaker 8 It might be R.A.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 Okay. I don't think he would have like specific.
Yeah, he would be. R.A.
would not be like early days of Sagan. He would be like, tell me about the fucking series against the May police.

Speaker 8 You remember when the stones played at the garden?

Speaker 1 Oh, we love the fucking chicklets, guys. Did this one just say a lot? I have a great Biz story coming later.
Oh, fuck yes.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so it was great.

Speaker 1 The 20th anniversary show was Wednesday night.

Speaker 1 It was wild to see everyone in the room.

Speaker 1 Basically, all of Barstool was there.

Speaker 1 It was crazy to see everyone there. Crazy to see people get presented awards for funny moments.
Basically, an entire trip down memory lane.

Speaker 1 I cried a couple times, which some people are saying is pussy. I say that's a football guy.
I just love my guys. I love my guys in the locker room.
Yeah, I've been too much.

Speaker 8 I've been watching the Frank the Tank video where he tells people not to give up on their dreams. Yeah.

Speaker 8 Which

Speaker 8 it makes me

Speaker 8 almost cry every time I watch it. It is legitimately an inspirational moment.

Speaker 1 Yes, it was. Put it in right here.

Speaker 8 Yeah, put that in.

Speaker 1 That was. Yeah, put that in.

Speaker 8 Yeah, put that in.

Speaker 1 Put that in right there.

Speaker 1 Put it in.

Speaker 8 Come on, Max. Is it in yet, Max?

Speaker 1 Put it right in between these tits. Come on, Max.
Slide it right in.

Speaker 1 I'll keep my bra on.

Speaker 1 Put in these tits.

Speaker 9 I work as a court clerk. clerk.
I settled as a court clerk. I studied broadcasting in college.
And it took,

Speaker 5 I never gave up, though.

Speaker 9 And that's the lesson here.

Speaker 1 Never give up your dream.

Speaker 1 And now I am working on a dream job here at Boston.

Speaker 1 Never give up your dream.

Speaker 1 Thank you, everyone. Thank all the fans.
Thank everyone

Speaker 1 who follows me every night. And thanks, Hanks Army.

Speaker 1 It was our award that we gave him. So we won the award for biggest controversy, Barstool Van Talk.

Speaker 1 I think we won that by default because the other controversies might have been weird to give an award for. Yeah.

Speaker 1 But we were honored to have it, but then we gave it to Frank, which I didn't discuss with you guys, but I figured you guys would be cool with it.

Speaker 8 I'm totally fine with that. Yeah.
I mean, Frank deserved to go home with some hardware. I think he was the

Speaker 8 leading trophy.

Speaker 1 He won two trophies because I gave him another trophy.

Speaker 1 Two awards later, I gave him a second trophy.

Speaker 8 Yeah, and he just came up on stage, took the mic, crowd control on point, was gesturing violently, telling people, I almost gave up on my dream, but I didn't. Never give up your dream.

Speaker 8 And I'm honestly about to cry just thinking about it. It was so good.

Speaker 1 I'd follow him to the depths of hell. Yeah.
I also, I got to see if there was an all-22 angle because White Sox Dave almost died walking upstairs, and it was

Speaker 1 the best seconds I've ever seen.

Speaker 8 He told me that going around last night.

Speaker 1 Yeah, White Sox Dave won the award for

Speaker 1 best TV performance, was it? Yeah,

Speaker 1 for the time that he battled gum on Chicago television, and

Speaker 1 he said to me after he knew he was going to win the award, and he started telling himself before the winner was announced, don't trip on the stairs, don't trip on the stairs, don't trip on the stairs.

Speaker 1 And then he immediately tripped on the stairs. Hard.

Speaker 8 Yeah. I don't know, Hank, we should see if there's like a wide view of Frank giving that speech because after it was over,

Speaker 8 there's really two ways that you can go on that stage. One is back down the stairs that you took to get up.

Speaker 8 The other is the side stage, which people were coming in to present awards, like that, that area. And so Frank just started like doing a circle.
And I was like, here, Frank, let's go this way.

Speaker 8 And I started pointing him to the side of the stage. And then he kept like going in a circle.
I was like, no, Frank, this way.

Speaker 8 And then he just walked away onto the other side of the stage and walked off that way. Frank makes his own rules.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he does. I tried to give Frank a hug.
He was not having it. No.

Speaker 1 He did the half-shoulder thing where it's like, this is all you're getting, buddy.

Speaker 8 And for people that say that Frank is just all doom and gloom and he doesn't really love the Mets, he was decked head to toe in Mets shit last night as his formal wear. Yes, yes.

Speaker 1 What other, I mean, there was a lot of great moments. You can still.
The guy didn't die. Yeah, there was a guy who we almost had DeMar Hamlin situation where we had to stop the show.

Speaker 8 Well, I saw him later. He looked at him.

Speaker 1 What happened? It was like he was just drunk and fell down. Yeah, me and Hank were warming up with a football while he was getting attended to by the medical staff.
Yeah. Jeff, Jeff D.

Speaker 1 Lowe and Rico ran up there. Like, did you what? I don't know that.

Speaker 8 Well, I guess Rico has training, right? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Jeff D. Lowe, what is he going to do? Ask him a question.
Yeah. Like, are you with us? Are you with us? Who wrote this hit song in 2002? Yeah, he's like, Black Eye Peace.
Oh, wait.

Speaker 8 No, it's Black Eye Peace. Sir, what day is it today? A Friday.

Speaker 1 Who was the leading passer in the Mountain West in 2003? How many fingers am I holding up?

Speaker 8 Gooch, can you check that for me?

Speaker 1 Yeah. All right, you actually still have your double dip, sir.

Speaker 1 Oh, I'd love to see Jeff D. Lowe giving medical, like, just doing the concussion protocol just based off the dust.

Speaker 1 Like, bro, I don't fucking know.

Speaker 1 This well-known snack.

Speaker 1 Ding-dongs.

Speaker 3 Ding-dongs.

Speaker 8 We're looking for ding-dongs.

Speaker 1 It was a great, great night. It was cool to see everyone.
It was cool to go down memory lane. Hopefully 20 more years.
I got a little sentimental.

Speaker 1 I was doing some, you know, like I said, crying, a little sentimental posting. Made sure I said, I hope

Speaker 1 we get takes off. It was a picture of me and Panty looking good, by the way.
We cleaned up nice. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I said, I can't wait to get takes off with this guy until we're old and grayer, just so that people couldn't get me on that.

Speaker 8 Yeah, that was smart. It was smart to add the ER on to that.
Mincy's done that once or twice.

Speaker 8 It was kind of an emotional time for sure because we do say it it a lot, but

Speaker 8 I want people to know that we understand that we do have the best job in the world. And don't take it for granted for a second.

Speaker 8 It's a surreal life, and we're very thankful to be here.

Speaker 1 It's also like

Speaker 1 we work so hard, and there's a lot right in front of us, you know, six inches in front of our face in terms of day-to-day, that it's cool to have those moments to be like, oh, shit, this is everything.

Speaker 1 This is the totality of everything that's been built.

Speaker 1 And shout out, Dave. Shout out, Dave.
10 years from me. Crazy.
I feel old, but young at the same time. I thought we took a great picture of the three of us.

Speaker 1 And then I, you know, click open the Instagram comment section and say, I was just roasting me for my stance. Yeah, roasting me for my chins.

Speaker 8 The stance, and

Speaker 8 people were making fun of the cuffs on your pants. People were making fun of my suit saying it didn't fit.

Speaker 1 You can't win. Also,

Speaker 8 that's as close as I'll ever get to wearing a suit that fits in my life.

Speaker 1 Newsflash, people.

Speaker 1 We podcast for a living. We're not good-looking guys, and we don't clean up well.
They're like, oh, where'd you get that suit? No shit, dude. We sit in sweatpants every day and watch football.

Speaker 1 It shouldn't be a shock that

Speaker 1 we don't look great in formal wear. Yeah.
I got my suit off the rack at DXL last week.

Speaker 8 Yeah.

Speaker 1 You look like

Speaker 1 you were going to eat all the apps at a big Greek wedding.

Speaker 1 Memes, the best compliment he's ever given me said, I looked like a bond villain.

Speaker 1 I'll take that home.

Speaker 8 I think you looked like a Bond villain's

Speaker 8 security guard at a Bond villain's lair.

Speaker 1 You know what that was?

Speaker 1 I'll take that too. You know what that was? Yeah, the first guy to die in the movie.
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 Literally number one.

Speaker 8 The guy in the

Speaker 8 guy in the GoldenEye video games that's just like pacing back and forth mindlessly. That's clueless when James Bond comes behind them.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah, and also,

Speaker 1 listen, I don't want to tell you what was happening there, but Memes was hatless. He's never hatless.

Speaker 1 He was given compliments to get him back. No, well, he said it as an insult.
Oh,

Speaker 1 but you took it as a compliment. Correct.
Got it.

Speaker 3 But memes look good without a hat.

Speaker 1 He's a different person. Corporate memes.

Speaker 1 We should make him not wear a hat. Just go corporate memes all the time.

Speaker 1 You do have great hair. Memes.

Speaker 1 Memes. If the Jets lose Monday Night Football against the Bills week one, you have to wear a suit the rest of the week.
No hat.

Speaker 1 PFD and I also want to do a perm bet at some point. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 8 Just curly ass hair. Max almost, we were probably 30 seconds away from an all-time max moment, an all-time max visual.
And he rescued it at the very last second.

Speaker 8 We're going out to the red carpet together, and Max is like, no, I don't want to go.

Speaker 1 I don't want to go.

Speaker 8 I was like, no, you're going to go out there. You're going to be my date.
Come on, let's do it. And we're about to step out onto the red carpet.

Speaker 8 And at the last second, Max realizes that his fly is completely down.

Speaker 1 Oh, he came up to me with it down. And

Speaker 8 there was about to be high-resolution pictures everywhere on the internet of Max really really feeling himself because he's got all these compliments about how good he looks with his

Speaker 8 boxers pulled through his fly.

Speaker 1 Max, answer this question. This is Circle of Trust, me and you.
That wasn't a, you forgot to zip it back up after the bathroom fly. That was a fat guy fly, right? I don't know.

Speaker 1 I don't even know what a fat guy fly is. Where your fly just goes down because you're just fat and it's just too much stress on the pants.

Speaker 8 Your zipper just gives up? Yeah, it just goes.

Speaker 1 They basically, it's like taking a flag half mast.

Speaker 1 They're like, yeah, we can't do this anymore.

Speaker 1 I think it was a bathroom fly.

Speaker 1 But I also saw you without the.

Speaker 1 I'm really bad at remembering to put my fly up after I go to the bathroom. That's good.
I'm really bad at it.

Speaker 3 It is so funny.

Speaker 8 I get yellow. We should start finding you.
Uniform violation.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Flies up right now. Flies up right now.
Fly up right now.

Speaker 1 Last thing I had was Skip is back. He is.
Or sorry, not Skip.

Speaker 1 Shannon Sharp is going. with Stephen A.
Smith to ESPN. This just proves what we all knew, that he hated Skip Bayless.

Speaker 8 Yeah, this is a move that's not just for Shannon Sharp. It's to get back at Skip.
Right. It's like getting with your buddy's ex-girlfriend.
You know exactly what you're doing.

Speaker 1 And if you take the exact same job, there's a common denominator. You just didn't like the other guy.
Yes. Like if Shannon Sharp had gone into coaching, he'd be like, oh, he just was done with TV.

Speaker 1 No, no, no. He's not done with TV.
He just didn't like Skip Bayless.

Speaker 8 Two very horny guys debating. Yeah.
That's what we know. Stephen A.

Speaker 1 Smith's got to chill out, too.

Speaker 1 He's on my guy, Lonzo Ball, a little too hard.

Speaker 1 He was saying he can't stand up or sit down. Then Lonzo Ball posted an Instagram video of him standing up and sitting down.

Speaker 8 He looks like he's great at standing up. Yeah.
He really does.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and so

Speaker 1 why don't you keep Lonzo Ball, my point guard, who probably won't ever get to see play again,

Speaker 1 out of your mouth.

Speaker 8 Yeah, there was also a great Jerry Jones moment the other day. I think it was this morning or last night.
Sam Williams on the Cowboys got arrested for a second time for speeding.

Speaker 8 He got arrested last year. And so Jerry goes, this sounds a little hollow, but he is maturing.
What was he going? 66 miles per hour? That's 32 miles per hour less this year.

Speaker 8 Oh, 98 last year to 66 miles per hour today.

Speaker 8 Progress. 66, not that bad.
What was it in, though?

Speaker 1 A 25 mile an hour school zone? I didn't look it up.

Speaker 8 I didn't look it up. It can't be.

Speaker 1 I'm guessing that he was going 66 and 66 in like a 40. Yeah.
He wasn't going 60. 135, maybe? Yeah.

Speaker 8 Because in Texas, there's a bunch of highways that are like 70, 75. So it definitely wasn't on a highway.

Speaker 1 What if he got pulled over for going too slow? They can do that. Yeah.

Speaker 8 Well, you remember Ezekiel Elliott? Wasn't he going like 110 miles per hour a couple years ago?

Speaker 1 Got a speeding problem? Make sports. You got a speeding problem, Mank? Comeback Player of the Year.

Speaker 1 Oh, comeback player of the year. Okay.
MVP. MVP.
Maybe.

Speaker 1 I guess you could say maybe in front of anything. Yeah.
You never know. You never know.
I got Baker. As of right now, he's on the same production as everyone else.
Which is what?

Speaker 1 Do you think he'll split votes though? Mac Jones winning comeback player of the year?

Speaker 8 Good question.

Speaker 1 Jones was good last year.

Speaker 8 What's he coming back from?

Speaker 1 Exactly. He had a great season.

Speaker 3 He had a great season last year.

Speaker 1 That actually should he should be eligible for comeback player of the year just because of Matt Jones.

Speaker 8 Surviving Matt Patricia?

Speaker 1 That's worse than any injury.

Speaker 8 If you look at the odds, they're so stacked to DeMar Hamlin winning, though.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 8 It's going to be tough for a football writer to vote against DeMar Hamlin.

Speaker 1 Yes, I'd agree.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 let's talk some more football. We got Andy Staples.
We're talking college ball. Give it up for Chicago.

Speaker 10 Sebastian Maniscalco's new stand-up special, It Ain't Right, is coming to Hulu on November 21st.

Speaker 1 30 years ago, Jeff Bezos, complete nerd. Bezos now ripped to shreds on his super yacht, and the boxes keep

Speaker 1 coming.

Speaker 10 Sebastian Maniscalco, It Ain't Right, premieres November 21st, streaming on Hulu and Hulu on Disney Plus for bundle subscribers. Terms apply.

Speaker 1 Okay, we now welcome on a very special guest, one of our good friends. It is time to talk some college football.
He is Andy Staples, and you can find him at Andy underscore Staples on Twitter.

Speaker 1 He has a new podcast on Three Sports, is the host of it. So it's

Speaker 1 go find it. New feed.

Speaker 5 Everyone go subscribe.

Speaker 1 Andy is a great, great college football reporter. So let's get into it.

Speaker 8 If you don't subscribe, you're a scumbag and you're dead to us.

Speaker 1 Yeah. I hope you get hit by a bad one.

Speaker 5 That's what I'm talking about.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Please.

Speaker 1 Let's get into it.

Speaker 8 Let's start big picture.

Speaker 1 I have a thought, and I want to hear your thoughts on it. I think this is going to be the funnest college football season we've ever had because

Speaker 1 we have all this change, all this realignment,

Speaker 1 and it's going to be bad blood, and it's going to be weird stuff happening, and it's like one last chance at this, at this last thing that we've had for a while now,

Speaker 1 and it's going to be awesome.

Speaker 5 Yes, this is the end of one particular era of college football. So you've got the expanded playoff coming.
You have new conference alignments coming next year.

Speaker 5 And you have basically teams that have left other teams to die. And

Speaker 1 yeah, I think, think about this.

Speaker 5 If you are Washington State and Oregon State, you want to kick the living shit out of the six teams from the Pac-12 that are going somewhere else.

Speaker 5 If you are anybody in the Big 12, because when Texas and Oklahoma left for the SEC, you could have had the same fate as Washington State and Oregon State.

Speaker 5 So if you're Kansas State, if you're Iowa State, you get a crack at those guys before they leave.

Speaker 5 You want to leave them with a lasting memory. So we're going to see lots of saltiness.

Speaker 5 And then, yeah, the last 14 playoff, the last time some of these games at the end of the season are as big as they are because it knocks somebody out. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 It's basically,

Speaker 1 we're living in a house where mom and dad broke up, but no one's moved out yet.

Speaker 5 Exactly. And it is,

Speaker 5 yeah, dad is, I don't know if dad's on the couch or in the spare room. Like, I feel like in the Pac-12, dad's still sleeping in the same bed, and it's just all kinds of stuff.

Speaker 1 They have an open relationship in the Pac-12.

Speaker 8 He's very clearly more in love with his secretary.

Speaker 1 Yeah, dad's sleeping in a bed and he's on Zillow every night before he goes to bed looking at homes in Piscataway.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's what he's doing.

Speaker 3 It's always Piscataway.

Speaker 1 It's always every time.

Speaker 8 I respect Rutgers. I respect Cheano Man.
I respect the program in Piscataway. I don't like that they've become a punchline.

Speaker 8 But I do think that if you, a lot of people are saying, like, okay, if you look at the SEC, Georgia is going to be the prohibitive favorite.

Speaker 8 They're probably going to be the favorite to win the national championship. College football is kind of a foregone conclusion.

Speaker 8 People are saying that they're missing the beauty, which is that this is going to be utter chaos. If you don't like chaos, then you probably just don't like college football in general.

Speaker 5 Well, exactly, because there will be versions of chaos in probably every conference except maybe the SEC. Because I look at the Big Ten this year, you know,

Speaker 5 I don't even think it's just an Ohio State, Michigan thing. You know, everybody's kind of come to terms with, oh, wait.
Michigan's actually good.

Speaker 5 It wasn't a fluke that they beat Ohio State two years in a row. But the thing is, like, Penn State is loaded with freaky talent this year.
Like, they could really be a Big Ten title contender.

Speaker 5 And if you're a Big Ten title contender, it means you could actually be a national title contender. So, you know,

Speaker 5 it's going to be very strange. Like, that one's going to be wild.
Like, the ACC, you got Florida State saying, we got to get the hell out of this conference. Like, their president said it out loud.

Speaker 8 You've got George W. Bush and Condoleezza Rice lobbying to try to get Stanford and SMU in.
Is that true? Did W pick pick up the phone for SMU and called the ACC and he's like, hey, take my boys.

Speaker 5 I wouldn't,

Speaker 5 nothing would shock me at this point.

Speaker 5 And I tell you what, the SMU group, they are so great at rallying people. Like, every time they want something to happen,

Speaker 5 they will get politicians on the phone. They will get,

Speaker 5 in Texas, they'll get legislative hearings called. Like, they'll have some committee.

Speaker 5 I remember when Texas and AM and Texas Tech were looking at joining the PAC 10 years ago, like this whole SMU group got everybody riled up and

Speaker 5 got a hearing called in the Texas legislature. And they're always looking for a way into that next conference because they still, like, the death penalty is still affecting them

Speaker 5 almost 40 years later. And they feel like they got completely screwed in that.
And let's be perfectly honest. The NIL era was built for SMU.

Speaker 5 They're ready to party. They got the money.

Speaker 8 Like 30 years ahead of their time. Kind of ironic that W would be against the death penalty in this situation, given his track record.
Yes.

Speaker 1 He killed a lot of people.

Speaker 8 You want to start with Big Ten?

Speaker 1 Yeah, I was going to say Caleb Williams. Big Ten.

Speaker 5 Let's start with the Black Technology. Big Ten quarterback, Caleb.

Speaker 1 You're never going to play anything. I know, I know.

Speaker 1 Yeah. But I was going to say, I wanted to start with Caleb Williams.
Heisman, prohibitive favorite, special, special player. Last we saw him losing to Utah with the injury and everything.

Speaker 1 Does USC have a defense? Because I feel like this is going to be just Lincoln Riley every year. The offensive is explosive, dynamic.

Speaker 1 They're going to win these big games where everyone's wowed by them. And then they go up against a team like a Utah who wants to just punch you in the mouth.

Speaker 1 And it all falls like a house of cards for them.

Speaker 5 So they have tried to improve their body types on defense. And they went in the transfer portal and they got Anthony Lucas from Texas A ⁇ M, who was a freshman last year.

Speaker 5 Actually played very well there, but family wanted him in a

Speaker 5 different circumstance and wanted him somewhere else. So he goes to USC.
They pick up Bear Alexander, who was playing at Georgia as a true freshman on that defensive line.

Speaker 5 And so they actually have guys that look the part now on the D line, which is not something that USC or any of the defenses on previous Lincoln Riley, Oklahoma teams had before.

Speaker 5 And so that I'm curious if that changes things a little bit because while they're not as deep as a Georgia or an Alabama on that front, they got some stuff that a lot of the other teams don't have.

Speaker 5 Now, Oregon has a little bit of that too because Mario Cristobal was recruiting for them because Dan Lanning is their head coach now and he was the DC at Georgia. So Oregon has some of that.

Speaker 5 Washington has some of that, but there's not a ton of that in the Pac-12. So it should help them theoretically, but the question is, are they going to be deep enough?

Speaker 5 Are they going to be physical enough in practice so that in November or in a Pac-12 championship game situation that they can tackle?

Speaker 5 Like the tackling in the Pac-12 championship game against Utah last year was embarrassing. So bad.
And it looked like a team that doesn't hit very much at the end of the season.

Speaker 5 And then you see, you know, you see what Georgia does and what Alabama does and what Michigan does.

Speaker 1 They look completely different.

Speaker 8 Yeah. Yeah.
You didn't even start out with the Big Ten quarterback with the most preseason Heisman hype. That's Bo Nix.
Yeah. From Oregon.

Speaker 1 Bo Nix and Cam Rise. They pack.

Speaker 8 Bo Nicks with a giant billboard in Times Square. Is it in Times Square?

Speaker 5 No, it's in like Gramercy. This is the year.
It's like 23rd and Park.

Speaker 8 Yeah, so Bo Nix being talked about for the Israel. Is this the year that Bonix finally puts it all together, Andy? I feel like we've had this exact conversation.

Speaker 8 So he was putting it together last year.

Speaker 5 Like,

Speaker 5 this was amazing to me because I saw this stat in... you know, late in the season, and I started comparing, and I thought, this can't be real.

Speaker 5 His stats going into the Washington game last year, that's the the one where he got dinged up and they ended up losing.

Speaker 5 But his stats going into that game, almost identical to Marcus Mariota in his Heisman season. Yeah.
And that was a dominant Heisman performance by Marcus Mariota.

Speaker 5 So, I mean, Bo is a touchdown machine. And yeah, I mean,

Speaker 5 he's definitely matured. The good bow, bad bow that you saw at Auburn, there's a lot less of bad bow.
And

Speaker 5 I like Oregon a lot.

Speaker 5 You look at also what they've gotten through the transfer portal, like Jordan Birch came from South Carolina, former five-star defensive line guy.

Speaker 5 Like, they have some guys that look like they could compete against anybody. And I know Georgia kicked the crap out of them last year.
I remember it. I watched.

Speaker 5 But I'm telling you right now, they've improved that roster to the point where they could be competitive against playoff-type teams.

Speaker 5 So they have to be more consistent because what happened last year against Washington shouldn't have happened. And maybe you chalked that up to Dan Lanning being a first-year head coach.

Speaker 5 What happened to them against Oregon State was just embarrassing. Yeah.
Oregon State ran the ball 17 times in a row while coming back from a deficit in the second half.

Speaker 5 This is just emasculating.

Speaker 1 It is funny because the Pac-12 is the conference of quarterbacks you know because you got Cam Rising, Bo Nicks, Caleb Williams, Cam Ward, like Michael Peenix, all these guys.

Speaker 1 This is, they have steady, sturdy quarterbacks, so it should be some really good football.

Speaker 5 Yeah, it is. And like, you didn't mention Jaden DeLore in Arizona, who started before before Camward at Washington State, but he's pretty good.

Speaker 1 And then DJ Uyungalai. Oh, yes.

Speaker 1 Is that Oregon State? Yeah. I wish DTR was still there.
DTR is a guy that I wish played college football forever.

Speaker 5 I saw DTR playing in the preseason and was just like, God bless this. This is only going to work in the preseason.
Yeah. But I'm glad he's getting his moment.

Speaker 1 Yes. So I have a question about a team that somehow feels like it's getting forgotten.

Speaker 1 And maybe for good reason, because for the first time in what feels like, I don't know, a a decade, Alabama doesn't have a surefire bona fide, like this guy is a great quarterback.

Speaker 1 Are we sleeping, though, on Bama? Because

Speaker 1 doesn't it feel like Nick Sabin has the defense is going to be very good? The offensive line is going to be very good. They're going to run the ball down your throat.

Speaker 1 It might be a throwback Alabama type of year.

Speaker 1 Is there a little bit of like, oh yeah, we've anointed Georgia for good reason. LSU is obviously on the come up with the year they had last year.
We beat him last year.

Speaker 1 but is this is this going to be like a throwback Nick Sabin? Like you're seeing it even with his buddy Bill Belichick in the NFL.

Speaker 1 Like they're going to, they're going to zag now when everyone zigs with the spread it out. Oh yeah.

Speaker 5 Yeah. There's there's a very big run the damn ball vibe coming out of Alabama right now because the front seven is very, very good.
If you don't know the name Jaheem Otis yet, you're going to.

Speaker 5 This is a dude grew up in Mississippi. Alabama offered him an eighth grade.
He showed up on campus weighing like 400 pounds. They got him down to like 330.
He's a monster on the defensive line.

Speaker 5 But they've also got Dallas Turner and Chris Braswell, who can get after the quarterback. So the assumption that because Will Anderson's gone, their pass rush is not as effective.

Speaker 5 No, it will be very effective. Where Alabama got in trouble last year was their

Speaker 5 DBs were not as good as they usually are. They were not as fast as they usually are.

Speaker 5 And you saw that hurt them in games like Tennessee, where you guys had Jalen Hyatt, you know, the fat, maybe the fastest guy in the SEC, running straight at DeMarco Helms, who's a safety, and getting a 20-yard head start.

Speaker 5 And what's DeMarco Helms supposed to do in that situation? So, Alabama, I think, a little bit faster in the secondary across the board,

Speaker 5 very good in the front seven. Their big questions at quarterback.
You know, they went and got Tyler Buckner as a transfer from Notre Dame, but he wasn't leaving a starting job there.

Speaker 5 Sam Hartman was going to be a starter at Notre Dame. So, Tommy Rees, who was Notre Dame's OC last year, is Alabama's OC this year.
And he's got to pick a quarterback.

Speaker 5 So you got, you got Tyler Buckner, who came from Notre Dame. You got Jalen Milro, who's the guy who started in place of Bryce Young against AM last year.
Who's a treat. And you got Ty Simpson.
Milro,

Speaker 1 that Texas AM game, like if you're picking best athletes on a field, he would win every single time, but he can't throw the ball.

Speaker 5 No, well, and that's the problem.

Speaker 1 He's a quarterback.

Speaker 5 I caught a pass in that game. I know you're going to ask me the Rowback question later.
I was wearing my Rowback performance performance hoodie, and I believe it had something to do with it.

Speaker 5 But Haynes King was playing quarterback at Texas A ⁇ M in that game, and he's at Georgia Tech now. And

Speaker 5 they let you down on the field for the last five minutes if you're in the press box.

Speaker 5 And so in one hand, I had my phone, and I'm filming the play because it's a tight game, coming down to the last drive. And Haynes King gets chased.
I want to say by Will Anderson.

Speaker 5 I think Will Anderson was in his lap. Throws the ball over the sideline.
And all of a sudden, I see it coming. And Texas AM's athletic director, Ross Bjork, is standing in front of me.

Speaker 5 He tries to catch it.

Speaker 5 He's a former fullback, so his hands are.

Speaker 1 But I got it while filming,

Speaker 5 got it with my left hand. So

Speaker 5 I think that's when you asked the rowback question. Yeah, there's my Rowback endorsement for you.

Speaker 8 You Odell Beckham did. That's awesome.
You got it on film.

Speaker 1 Yes. Yes.

Speaker 5 But no, Milro in that game, I'm surprised he didn't throw many passes either.

Speaker 1 Because

Speaker 5 he was spraying it all all over.

Speaker 1 But he can swear.

Speaker 5 Now that I work for On3, we have all these team sites. I cruise the message boards quite a bit.
The Bama folks are convinced Milro's the guy.

Speaker 1 Really?

Speaker 5 I don't know that. I have no idea.
That's one of those, like, Georgia, Carson Beck's going to be the guy. But Alabama, I have no idea who the guy's going to be.

Speaker 8 Carson Beck is just, that just sounds like a good quarterback.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Georgia quarterbacks. This is why Alabama should run the triple option.
I I've always wanted to.

Speaker 8 I was about to say, like, you want to do the ultimate sign while everybody else eggs. Obviously, with Tommy Reese, I guess he's no longer Tom Reese.
He was Tom Reese for like no, he's back to Tommy.

Speaker 5 Switched to him.

Speaker 1 He must be young again.

Speaker 8 So since they have him, they're probably not going to do it. But it would be sick if Nick Sabin brought in like an Army offensive coordinator and just fucked with everybody for a year.

Speaker 5 Well, Army's not running the triple anymore, so they should steal it from them. And now, there's a name

Speaker 5 that you need to remember: Justice Haynes. He's a freshman running back at Alabama.

Speaker 5 Steelers fans will remember Veron Haynes. Georgia fans obviously remember Veron Haynes.

Speaker 5 He played fullback there and caught the game-winning pass against Tennessee when Larry Munson said, We stepped on their face with a hobnail boot and broke their nose. Well, this is his kid.
Okay.

Speaker 5 And he is

Speaker 1 unbelievable.

Speaker 5 So just skip Justice Haynes, crank up the Heisman campaign for a couple of years from now.

Speaker 8 So there's another quarterback in the SEC that I want to talk about because he's probably my favorite quarterback to watch in theory. And that's Bazooka Joe Milton, right?

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 8 Andy, did you know that he threw an orange 120 yards?

Speaker 5 Nothing would shock me. Yeah, but there's no Joe Milton throwing something.
There is no Joe Milton projectile stat that will surprise me.

Speaker 8 Yeah, before the Orange Bowl last year was the orangest Orange Bull of all time, Clemson against Tennessee. They gave him an orange.
They said, how far can you throw it?

Speaker 8 He threw it 120 yards, which is just, he's a freak. He's an absolute freak.
He says that he can throw a football 90 yards. I don't know if that's true, but

Speaker 8 I guess I could believe it. The problem is going to be like, can he direct where the ball is going at all? But I'm still excited to see what he does in that offense.

Speaker 8 Should Tennessee fans be excited about Bazooka Joe like I am?

Speaker 1 Yes, absolutely.

Speaker 5 So I told Big Cat this when he came on my show earlier this week. I went to Tennessee a couple springs ago, and this is when Hidden Hooker was still the starter.

Speaker 5 And one of their coaches goes, okay, you're going to practice tomorrow, right? And I said, yeah.

Speaker 5 He said, you're going to stand behind Joe Milton, and you're going to watch him throw a football, and you're going to say, This is the greatest quarterback I've ever seen in my life.

Speaker 5 And the next day, I was behind Joe Milton. They were doing one of those coming out of your own end zone kind of situations.

Speaker 5 So he takes a snap, drops back into the end zone, unleashes it like 60 yards down the field, dime.

Speaker 1 I'm like, Yep, nope, best quarterback I've ever seen in my entire life.

Speaker 5 But even though I've seen him at Michigan, I've seen him when he got the job at Tennessee and then gave it away to Hennon Hooker because he was airmailing balls in games.

Speaker 5 But that Orange Bowl, which was against a good Clemson defense, which was, you know, they didn't have a lot of opt-outs. They were very well manned.

Speaker 1 He carved him up.

Speaker 5 And so I'm fully in, fully believing.

Speaker 5 But I also know that Tennessee fans, if he does come out and you see the old Joe Milton appear, even in the Virginia game, he sees an opener, which they should win pretty easily against Virginia quarterback Tony Musket, which is a great quarterback name.

Speaker 1 For Virginia, too.

Speaker 5 Exactly.

Speaker 5 The only one better would be Tony Blunderbuss. But

Speaker 5 the Joe Milton Heisman campaign, if he airmails like two balls in a row, is going to hit a brick wall.

Speaker 5 And then the Tennessee fans will immediately chanting for Nico Iyama Mayalaba. And y'all remember the NIL stories, the big NIL deal.

Speaker 5 There's a dude who signed this huge NIL. He's the guy.
And I, you know, personality-wise, if there's anybody who can handle that sort of thing, Nico seems to have the personality for it.

Speaker 5 But they really do love this guy at Tennessee. They think he can be a star.
I think they would love for Joe Milton to have a good year so that Nico is not thrust into that and can develop.

Speaker 5 But he's an interesting one, too, because he's got a big arm. He's 6'5 and fairly thin.
But dad's like 320 pounds.

Speaker 5 Dad's a monster. So at some point, Nico may be 6'5, 230 230

Speaker 5 and just running dudes over with this arm. Yes.
But Joe is already that. That's what Joe is.
Joe is Anthony Richardson, maybe not quite as fast without the backflips.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 8 I could just watch him throw things. Yeah.
If he ends up not starting, they should just do like a Friday live stream. We're just going to give him various things and see how far he can throw him.

Speaker 8 Here's a cat. Let's see if he can get it 30 yards in the air.

Speaker 1 Here's a wrench. I want to trust Joe Milton.

Speaker 1 It's the Michigan and it's the time that he went out of of bounds on fourth down to end the game.

Speaker 1 Those two things are in the back of my head where I'm like, I want to give it, because he is so much fun to watch. But those two things just stick in my head.

Speaker 9 Big Cat, I'm a Florida grad.

Speaker 5 I have to ask you a Wisconsin question. Yes.

Speaker 5 Should Florida be trusting Graham Mertz?

Speaker 1 Oh, Mertz for Heisman.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 I like Graham. He's a good guy.

Speaker 5 History has told you that.

Speaker 1 He's a great kid, and I feel bad for him because

Speaker 1 it was tough for him because he had the start he had. That Illinois game was basically a quarterback can't play more perfect football than what he did.

Speaker 5 The COVID year, we're all watching.

Speaker 1 It was incredible. And he obviously has the tools, but just the decision-making is not always there.

Speaker 1 And that's, and if you have that a couple times, it's the difference between winning seven, eight games, winning 10 games. So

Speaker 1 I'm rooting for him. Let's say that.
I'm rooting for him. I do not want him to be important.

Speaker 5 What I've gathered from talking to people around Florida's program, they love him. Right.
And everybody's excited.

Speaker 8 He looks

Speaker 8 understand. Yeah.

Speaker 5 But

Speaker 5 it'll be a lot of, you know, Montreal Johnson and Trevor Etienne, who are very good running backs. If they can run the ball a little bit, maybe it takes some pressure off him.

Speaker 5 But that seems to be the book on Graham.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 11 Aldi is now on Uber Eats.

Speaker 11 So whether your fridge is empty and you're too tired to shop or you just ran out of essential ingredients don't worry we got you get 40 off your first ulti order on uber eats with code new uldi25 orders 30 or more save up to 25 and it's 1231 see out for details um all right so give us a team that you think is going to disappoint and a team that you think is going to surprise

Speaker 5 so

Speaker 5 the one i I need to see them do this because the expectations are sky high again.

Speaker 5 And it's like we talk ourselves into this every single year without them ever showing us they can do this on the field is Texas. Texas is going to be favored to win the Big 12.

Speaker 5 They're probably going to be favored in 11 of 12 games, probably every game but Alabama.

Speaker 5 They actually have quite a bit of NFL talent this year, which I know everybody's like, oh, Texas has five-star recruits every year. They've not put out a ton of NFL talent in the last 10 years.

Speaker 5 This time they haven't. They've got a bunch of guys the NFL people like.
So there's really no excuse for them not to close out their time in the Big 12 with a title.

Speaker 5 But I've seen too many times, and it's not just Steve Sarkeesian, you know, it's when Tom Herman was coaching them, when Charlie Strong was coaching him, where they roll in to, you know, to play somebody who they're clearly more talented than.

Speaker 5 Last year it was Texas Tech and Oklahoma State, and they just find a way to lose. And I need to see them win these games before I can believe.
And so like their

Speaker 5 total is nine and a half. I picked the under, and everybody went nuts.
And

Speaker 5 look, feel free to clown me if Texas rolls to a Big 12 title.

Speaker 1 Great.

Speaker 5 That's what Texas should be doing. And as they go into the SEC,

Speaker 5 they'll be in good shape. But until we see them do that

Speaker 5 with the games that they should win, where they are more talented than the opponent,

Speaker 5 I can't believe yet because I've been fooled so many times. So, like, beat Kansas State, beat TCU, beat Iowa State, beat Texas Tech.
Then we can talk.

Speaker 8 Yeah, going back to even like Mac Brown when he was at Texas in his last couple of years, he would just get five stars on five stars on five stars and then not develop them to the level that like I remember they had Malcolm Brown and Jonathan Gray at running back and everybody in the country was saying these are the best two running back prospects that we've seen in the last you know 10, 15 years.

Speaker 8 Ricky Williams, we got two Ricky Williamses on our roster right now. They don't turn him out.

Speaker 8 I will give you you a counterpoint, though, why, or I guess maybe in your favor, why maybe you would look to fade Texas, and that is Quinn Ewers cut his mullet, which is disturbing.

Speaker 5 I was very disappointed on many levels. You said it was about leadership.
Listen, the mullet exudes leadership. It is business up front still.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's true. Like,

Speaker 5 why would you cut it off?

Speaker 5 You're not losing the business if you have the party.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Right.

Speaker 8 And a lot of people are talking about Arch Manning as a highly tatted recruit coming in. Obviously, he's got everything in the world going for him.

Speaker 8 But if you're plugged in on the 40 Acres like we are, Andy, you know that Malik Murphy is a dog.

Speaker 8 And a lot of people in Austin are saying...

Speaker 5 He's good.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 5 Before we go too far with the Malik Murphy, if Quinn were to go down or Quinn were to

Speaker 5 have problems,

Speaker 5 you might see Arch.

Speaker 8 Yeah. You think so? You think he's going to beat out Malik?

Speaker 5 I think there's a good chance.

Speaker 8 Interesting.

Speaker 1 I also think it's just going to to be everyone just clamoring for him, too.

Speaker 5 I don't even think it's that. I think they'll play whoever they think is better.
And, you know, the one thing with Arch is they're not going to pressure the family in that.

Speaker 5 They're not going to pressure anybody to play him. They seem to go in with a pretty mature plan for him and are, you know, perfectly accepting of if he needs a year or so to win that job.

Speaker 5 But it may be that he develops faster and they feel like he's ready. So that one, I'll be curious to see if Sark announces who the backup is and who the third guy is.

Speaker 5 But you saw Quinn get hurt in the Alabama game. So in game two last year, they would have won that game.
They would have forced Hudson card to play. Yeah, so

Speaker 5 I will be very curious to see who goes in second if something happens with Quinn Ewery.

Speaker 1 All right. So, and then the flip side, a team that you think is going to surprise people that no one's talking about.

Speaker 5 I think people in the SEC are talking about this. I don't know about nationally, but Kentucky seems to have fixed a lot of the things that caused problems last year.

Speaker 5 Where they just, the offense didn't quite work. They had lost Liam Cohen to the Rams.
He comes back as the OC. This is the same guy that had Will Levis the first year Levis was at Kentucky.

Speaker 5 So they've got Devin Leary now, who was the NC State quarterback for a long time and actually went into last season as their, you know, NC State was a Mountain Heisman campaign for him.

Speaker 5 He was coming off a really good 2021, but he had a shoulder injury and had to have surgery. So

Speaker 5 they could be quite a bit better.

Speaker 5 They will, they have some very good young receivers in Dane Key and Barion Brown, hopefully better on the offensive line.

Speaker 5 That will be a big one for them is they just have gone kind of downhill in that department, but they've recruited well over the years. So you think it'll come back around.

Speaker 5 And so that's one that if you're Tennessee, if you're Florida, if you're South Carolina, you're worried about them being considerably better than they were last year. Right.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Should we talk a a little, Big Ten? It's going to be fun. Michigan, this is the best chance Michigan has to win a national championship.

Speaker 1 It feels like this is the culmination of everything Harbaugh's built the last two years going to the college football playoff, beating Ohio State.

Speaker 1 But in the back of my head, I'm like,

Speaker 1 and this is going against what we historically know, because what we historically know is Penn State plays Ohio State well and then gets killed by Michigan.

Speaker 1 But Penn State feels like they also, like, it's going to be a very fun East with those three teams and how it all shakes out. And

Speaker 1 so what are your thoughts on that?

Speaker 5 So

Speaker 5 Penn State gets killed by Michigan in Ann Arbor, but that game's in State College. Yeah.
And then that's honestly, as simplistic as that is,

Speaker 5 I can't explain why they can't play in Ann Arbor, but they can't. And so when Michigan comes to state college, Penn State has a chance.

Speaker 5 And for whatever reason, Penn State always plays Ohio State tough no matter where they're playing. Right.
So So that game's in Columbus, but I expect that to be a close game.

Speaker 5 I'd probably still say Ohio State's the winner if you asked me to pick a winner right now, but I would expect it to be competitive.

Speaker 5 But Penn State, yeah, they're a different, different animal this year. Now, Michigan is loaded with NFL talent.

Speaker 5 Jim Harbaugh told my friend Bruce Feldman he thinks 20 guys are going to get drafted off this roster, which seems slightly aggressive.

Speaker 5 But like Jim Nagy from the Senior Bowl said he thinks there's seven offensive linemen who are draft eligibles.

Speaker 5 That's not including including freshmen and sophomores, some of which are good too, who he thinks will be in NFL camps next year.

Speaker 1 Wow.

Speaker 5 Dudes that aren't even going to start. Wow.
And that is a lot of talent and a lot of really good development that Michigan staff has done. So

Speaker 1 I

Speaker 5 don't think Michigan beating Ohio State the last two years is a fluke.

Speaker 8 No.

Speaker 5 I need to see Ohio State beat them. to prove that they can.
I do feel like Ohio State is built a little more to play

Speaker 5 on carpet in a dome.

Speaker 5 And like if you play that game again on carpet in a dome, which you might be doing once the divisions go away in the Big Ten championship game, maybe Ohio State is better suited for that.

Speaker 5 But in November, in the cold, Michigan's built for this now.

Speaker 1 It was either you or your former co-host, Ari Wasserman, said it perfectly that Ohio State has spent all these years building a program to beat SEC while Michigan built a program to beat Ohio State.

Speaker 5 To beat Ohio State. And that's where we we had a commenter who was even better.

Speaker 5 He said, Ohio State, this is 00224 on YouTube. Ohio State is built to hang 50 on Michigan State, and Michigan's built to beat Ohio State.

Speaker 1 Right. And it happened last year where you saw Ohio State put the national,

Speaker 1 they easily could have won that game against the national champion Georgia, and it wasn't a fluke that Michigan bullied them around again.

Speaker 5 Well, and Ohio State, if they get a little bit better defensively, they can win the national championship. Yeah.
I mean, that's the thing.

Speaker 5 And they'll have a new quarterback this year, but with that receiving cork,

Speaker 5 like we would throw for 3,500 yards in that offense. So it's the defense and

Speaker 5 stop giving up such big plays. Like that Michigan game, the two Cornelius Johnson touchdowns.
Like, how in the world did you let that happen? Yeah. They need another Bosa brother.
That makes no sense.

Speaker 1 They need another Bosa brother. They got to find another Bosa brother.

Speaker 8 Somewhere. It's simple sometimes.

Speaker 5 They are not.

Speaker 5 It's interesting because that factory

Speaker 5 does, it feels like the Bosa brothers, Chase Young, but JT Tui Malao is a pretty damn good pass rusher. You saw him in the Penn State game last year.

Speaker 5 If he can have more games like that, they're okay. So what's going to happen with Harbaugh?

Speaker 8 I've heard, we've all heard the four-game story. Now it seems like the NCAA,

Speaker 8 the negotiations have broken down, which that's still puzzling to me that you negotiate the suspension with a team, but that's like the 200th most weird out-of-control thing that the NCAA does.

Speaker 8 So is Harbaugh, how many games is he actually going to be able to coach this year, in your opinion?

Speaker 5 He'll coach all the games this year because basically, so the Committee on Infractions, so this would be the equivalent, and

Speaker 5 don't do too much real world justice NCAA equivalency, but it would basically be the equivalent of the defense and the prosecutor agreed on a plea deal, and the judge rejected it.

Speaker 5 That's what happened.

Speaker 5 They were going to do a four-game suspension, and the Committee on Infractions, which is the one that hears the case, it's like, nah, which means they've already decided they want to punish him more than that.

Speaker 5 So, but now the timing always drags out in NCAA land. So they wouldn't even have the hearing probably till after the season.
You wouldn't find out the results of that till months after that.

Speaker 5 So Jim Harbaugh, you know, he may be the NFL by that point. He's flirted with it two years in a row.

Speaker 5 Or I can see him just double middle fingering them and they say, okay, we're going to suspend you for six games.

Speaker 5 And he's like, fine, I'll sit out and then I'll kick you out, you know, kick everybody's ass when I get back.

Speaker 8 Yeah, it is funny how the NCAA and the NFL does this too.

Speaker 8 They think that they're a branch of law enforcement, they think that they're actually like the justice system, and they have all these hearings.

Speaker 8 The ATF, and at the end of the day, they're just all making up the rules as they go along.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 5 The hardbot thing, though, I do wonder because he has, you know, he talked to the Vikings two years ago. He talked to the Broncos this past year.

Speaker 5 It's not like he's a guy who has been a great college coach, and we kind of wonder if he could do it in the NFL. He took a team to the freaking Super Bowl.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah, he's a great coach.
He took the to multiple nfc championship games yes he he is a great coach period

Speaker 5 yeah so i it's the michigan fans get mad when you bring this up like oh this might push him to the nfl they're like how can you say that i'm like well he keeps trying to go there anyway so

Speaker 5 what what why is this surprising to you right but if if i'm him i'm like to hell with this

Speaker 5 because the situation is

Speaker 5 He now, there's multiple facets to this case, but the hardball part is is this is during COVID. You weren't supposed to have any visitors on campus.

Speaker 5 Some folks were coming onto campus to just visit, see the campus. These were committed players that already planned to sign with Michigan, and they driven a long way.

Speaker 5 And basically, he's like, well, I'm going to go see him. And you were not supposed to do that.
And so

Speaker 5 they went to a burger place.

Speaker 5 He actually, from what the guys at our Michigan site, the Wolverine, have told me, he didn't pay for the burgers because he's Jim Harbaugh and it's free, but he put a tip down and that's where the receipt came from that they hit him with when they're saying did you do this because he's he's doing the you know what every defense lawyer will tell you i don't recall right yeah and they hit him with the receipt and he still said i don't recall and so now they say that that he's giving false or misleading information and that's what they're actually going to try him for as opposed to

Speaker 8 it's not the burgers yeah it's saying i don't recall about the burgers which is it's yeah this is just such a stupid conversation to be having he went out to lunch with players that are going to play for him.

Speaker 8 There should be somebody in the room with common sense, and the NCAA doesn't have any of that.

Speaker 5 I've always said the NCAA should have a VP of common sense.

Speaker 5 They don't, clearly.

Speaker 1 But yeah,

Speaker 5 this is weird because Jim Tressel at Ohio State essentially got fired over the same thing. He lied to the investigators about knowing that some of his players were trading.

Speaker 5 their stuff for tattoos and cash and stuff.

Speaker 5 And I wonder if the NCAA people, like the enforcement staff, who honestly, they're probably having an existential crisis because what do they do anymore?

Speaker 5 Like their job for years and years was to keep players from getting paid. They can't stop that now.
So now

Speaker 5 they're going to try to hammer every coach they can. But maybe they just don't need to exist.

Speaker 5 Maybe the enforcement department of the NCAA needs to worry about other things.

Speaker 1 They got to save their job.

Speaker 8 Defund. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I have a couple more questions.

Speaker 1 Clemson, Dabo, hot seat.

Speaker 1 No, definitely not. Come on.

Speaker 5 But I'm intrigued because he's brought in Garrett Riley as offensive coordinator. So Garrett Riley was the OC for TCU.
He's the younger brother of Lincoln Riley, the USC coach.

Speaker 5 Every time Dabo's brought new ideas into Clemson, Clemson has gotten better. I was a little worried last year when both coordinators left.
Clemson promoted from within. And it's like, okay.

Speaker 5 Are you sure what you're doing is going to keep you on pace to compete for national titles? And

Speaker 5 they look stale offensively last year. They looked fine defensively, but they look stale offensively.
So now they're bringing in new ideas.

Speaker 5 But I do wonder, you know, from a talent standpoint on offense, I don't worry about their defense. I think they're going to be fine there.
Do they have the playmakers beyond Will Shipley? And,

Speaker 5 you know, are they going to have the receiving core? Because remember, think about who they used to have at receiver when they had, you know, pre-injury Justin Ross and T.

Speaker 5 Higgins and Mike Williams and Sammy Watkins. And do they have any special receivers like that? Because

Speaker 5 they're going to need that to get back to where they were.

Speaker 8 Yeah, I would say yes, hot seat for Dabo, by the way. Yeah.
Because in his own words, he said he would quit coaching college football if the players got paid.

Speaker 1 It's true. He put himself on the hot seat.

Speaker 5 Well, the former Big Ten commissioner said they were going to go D3. And shockingly, they haven't.
They've just signed a larger TV deal.

Speaker 8 Yeah, it's easy to say stuff. Yeah.
A lot of people say a lot of things sometimes.

Speaker 1 We don't. It's very true.

Speaker 8 Just back to the Big Ten real quick. There's one more name name I want to talk about.
You know, I'm a big fullback guy. We're a big fullback podcast.

Speaker 8 We do the low man trophy for the nation's top college fullback. You are a voter.
You're on the committee for the low-man trophy. Oh, yeah.
There's one person and one person only on

Speaker 8 my personal preseason watch list, and that's Hayden Large from Iowa. So

Speaker 1 you could call Iowa fullback you.

Speaker 8 Wisconsin might have a claim to that too.

Speaker 1 Army probably has a claim to that.

Speaker 8 Hayden Large is 6'5 ⁇ , a massive fucking fullback. That's insane.
It's insane that this guy's playing fullback. Is he going to be able to get low enough to be a proper fullback?

Speaker 8 Because we all know low man wins.

Speaker 5 Transfer from Dort College. I'm sure you followed them closely over the years.

Speaker 1 Now,

Speaker 5 but this is what I've been wondering why we don't see this more.

Speaker 5 Because this is a tight end playing fullback, essentially. And, you know, you have people who have H-backs who are essentially tight ends that will come into the backfield and do some things.

Speaker 1 But why not,

Speaker 5 because the fullback position has sort of been schemed out of existence in most places, why not just have your tight end body types doing that stuff?

Speaker 5 Why can't the tight end every once in a while just line up in front of the tailback with the quarterback under center? And now you're in the eye formation. Why can't you just do that?

Speaker 5 And so I like I'm rooting for Hayden Large because I think it will open up a new world of offensive football because these guys don't want to go recruit fullbacks.

Speaker 5 They don't want to have to find them. They don't really exist anymore in high school football.
You got to find a linebacker and then move him. So everybody wants to play tight end now.

Speaker 5 Everybody's watching George Kittle and Kelsey and they want to do that. So

Speaker 5 just make them do it.

Speaker 1 They like to block for the most part.

Speaker 5 10 or three-point stance and let them lead on somebody.

Speaker 8 So are you telling me that having like a giant person that weighs a lot of weight

Speaker 8 blocking you is more effective sometimes than having a shorter person that's very heavy.

Speaker 1 Well, you know, it's just sad.

Speaker 8 But the leverage, though. Yeah, the leverage, exactly.
It's sad because, like, there's, it's almost like there's no room in college football for like a 510 guy that weighs 270.

Speaker 5 I do worry about the short kings, but I think I still feel like there is room because like there's always going to be a Mac team that has a 510, 315 pound nose guard. Yeah.

Speaker 5 And he's going to, and he can bench press 550 pounds. And like, it's, though, there will always be somewhere for that person to play because,

Speaker 5 yes, the Georgias, the Ohio States, the world, they need those perfect NFL ready bodies. But everybody else, like, you need somebody who either can block or can't be blocked.

Speaker 5 And so even if you're not the prettiest package,

Speaker 5 you're still useful to those guys. So, PFT, I think the Short Kings still have a place in the game.

Speaker 8 I'm glad to hear that. We saw it a year ago.
We're talking about big guys playing fullback. Hunter Lepke, obviously, great fullback, won the award.

Speaker 8 But there was one play where Jalen Carter stepped in at fullback for Georgia and just took out three guys. And you're like, oh, yeah, maybe just having the biggest person you can find laying blocks.

Speaker 8 That could work somewhere.

Speaker 5 The fastest, strongest, most explosive player on your team, if you're on the goal line and you would like them to knock some people over,

Speaker 5 not a bad idea.

Speaker 1 I love the phrase, you just got to find someone who can block or can't be blocked.

Speaker 1 Put that on a board and put it behind your offset.

Speaker 5 Oh, I don't want to see that in in a barstool store.

Speaker 1 We're going to put that in the on-three store.

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Speaker 1 Two-part question. Give me the final four.

Speaker 1 And then also, if you have a week zero bet that we can bet.

Speaker 1 Oh, okay. So, final four.

Speaker 1 I'm going to go.

Speaker 5 I'm going to go Georgia,

Speaker 5 Michigan. Mm-hmm.

Speaker 1 Where am I going?

Speaker 5 See, I owe

Speaker 5 my former co-host Ari Washington a thousand bucks if USC makes the playoff.

Speaker 5 But I do think they might be able to do it. Okay.

Speaker 1 But no, I'm going to go Oregon.

Speaker 5 I'm going to say Oregon wins the Pac-12. okay.
First Pac-12 playoff participant since 2016, and then the league goes

Speaker 5 and then Alabama. Okay, so two big 1 teams in the Georgia and Alabama play for the SEC championship, and Alabama doesn't win it, but makes the playoff anyway.

Speaker 1 So, two big 10 teams, two SEC teams. I like that, essentially, yeah.
Oh, yeah, and then week zero pick, anything you like?

Speaker 5 I kind of like Notre Dame to cover really against Navy, and I realize it's 20 and a half, but

Speaker 5 I'm excited to see Sam Hartman in that Notre Dame offense.

Speaker 1 In defense of that pick, because Navy does feel like they always play Notre Dame close, but when you have an entire offseason to get ready for the triple option, it's different than when you schedule Navy like week six.

Speaker 5 Yeah.

Speaker 5 And you have the buffer.

Speaker 5 You're going to Ireland, so everybody's going to be all up, you know, Guinness everywhere. Hopefully they don't run out of beer like they did last time.

Speaker 5 Remember the, I guess the credit card machine stopped working, so they just started giving beer away. Yes.
And the Nebraska fans are like, all right.

Speaker 1 Yes. Yes.

Speaker 8 Yes. I was just in Ireland.
They're very excited about college football over there.

Speaker 1 You can feel

Speaker 5 I saw Blue Mountains at the wedding reception in Ireland. That's impressive.

Speaker 8 So it was weird because in Ireland, obviously the Guinness is fantastic over there. Drank a lot of that.
But on every tap, they have like Guinness. They'll have a cider.

Speaker 8 And then they'll have Coors Light. Coors Light is like the most prevalent American beer in Ireland.
It's taken over the world?

Speaker 1 That's awesome.

Speaker 5 It's because of you guys. It's the billion downloads.

Speaker 1 The mountains are green. Yes.
Well, Andy, thank you as always. We'll have you back on later on in the season.
You are the best.

Speaker 1 I just, there was a moment there where you were talking about Ohio State, Penn State, and Michigan that I just got like a little like smile creeping over my face. I'm like, oh yeah, we're here.

Speaker 5 We're so close now. We are

Speaker 8 just days away. It's the best.

Speaker 5 It's going to be here.

Speaker 1 It's the best. And we have the whole thing in front of us.

Speaker 8 Nothing better.

Speaker 1 So thank you, Andy. Everyone go subscribe to this podcast on the On3 Network and we'll talk to you soon.

Speaker 5 Thanks guys. See you Andy.

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Speaker 8 And now here's Mount Rushmore of ass kickings.

Speaker 1 Okay, Mount Rushmore time.

Speaker 1 Let's have a good Mount Rushmore. Trilogies was...

Speaker 1 It was.

Speaker 1 We're going to do the Mount Rushmore of ass kickings. Very open-ended.
Who do you think won trilogies?

Speaker 1 I don't know. I have no idea.
I think

Speaker 1 the losers were the AWLs. Oh, come on.

Speaker 1 Ass kickings. Mount Rushmore of ass kickings.
I have high hopes for this one. I think there's some great things that we can throw out there.
Who goes first?

Speaker 5 It's going to be me and Billy. In this case, me and Memes.
Hank and Max, BigCam PFT.

Speaker 1 Okay, I love being last. Let's go.
Okay. Ass kickings.
Anything is on the table.

Speaker 5 Yes. With the first overall kick.

Speaker 1 Pick. Kick.

Speaker 8 Oh, it's a kick. It's an ass kick.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. True.

Speaker 5 With the first overall pick, we're going to go with USA over England in 1776.

Speaker 1 All right. Okay.

Speaker 8 There's some back and forth there. The French helped, too.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but everyone on the non-American side, like, yeah, we crushed them. We lost a lot of lives.
Yeah, we did.

Speaker 1 A lot of good muscle balls. They were kicked their ass.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I don't. Yeah, okay.
I don't.

Speaker 5 From the American perspective.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 I feel like it was a struggle, but yeah.

Speaker 1 We had to fucking sneak attack them across the river. Wins a win.
Win is a win. Was it...

Speaker 1 Didn't they? Didn't they then win the rematch, 1812?

Speaker 8 That was more of a stalemate. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 1 Seems like a pander pick. Pander to who?

Speaker 5 Americans?

Speaker 5 Yes.

Speaker 1 Yeah. They're people who vote.

Speaker 5 Every pick is a pander pick to Americans.

Speaker 1 Well, not really.

Speaker 1 Speaking of that,

Speaker 1 we have

Speaker 1 Nazi Germany versus France. I'm about to go with an anti-American pick.
Okay.

Speaker 1 Even drawing

Speaker 1 versus Apollo Creed. Oh, that was an ass pick.
Yeah. He literally killed him.
He killed him. He killed him.
Yeah. The biggest ass pick of all time.
Yeah, spoiler.

Speaker 1 Kills Apollo Creed.

Speaker 1 And then Adonis Creed becomes a beast. Okay.
Watch that movie on the plane.

Speaker 8 All right, PFT.

Speaker 1 We have our whole board.

Speaker 8 We do. It's a good-looking, juicy board.

Speaker 1 It's a good-looking, juicy board. I kind of want to go 9-12, but I'll hear...
Or 9-11.

Speaker 1 You're a big 9-11 guy?

Speaker 7 If it's your first picks, it should just be 1-2, right?

Speaker 1 No, because we don't have to.

Speaker 1 You'll never get one.

Speaker 8 But you should just come and like, okay.

Speaker 1 Okay, go this way.

Speaker 8 You go 9. Okay.

Speaker 1 The 2000 U.S. Open Tiger Woods winning by 15 strokes.

Speaker 1 That's an ass kicking. That's an insane number.

Speaker 8 What's great about this is it wasn't like one person kicking another guy's ass. It was one person kicking everybody's ass.
15

Speaker 1 strokes is such a fucking out, like that's silly.

Speaker 8 He kicked the course's ass, yeah.

Speaker 1 So that's our first pick. What do you think about that, Max?

Speaker 1 It's a good pick.

Speaker 8 You should have been prepared for it right off the get.

Speaker 1 I was.

Speaker 8 So now we go

Speaker 8 you want to go 12 or 15, big cat.

Speaker 1 Well,

Speaker 1 if we want to

Speaker 1 12, I guess.

Speaker 8 Okay. Secretariat winning by 31 links at the Belmont.

Speaker 1 31 lengths. 31 lengths.

Speaker 8 That's 31 horses.

Speaker 8 There was 31 horses in between him and the second horse.

Speaker 1 Insane. To win the triple crown.

Speaker 8 Best athlete of all time.

Speaker 1 All time.

Speaker 1 What? You don't like that pick? That's a good pick.

Speaker 1 Why'd you give the face? Explain the face. This is a podcast.
This is a podcast. Me and Max met, and we got a lot of lists for the other two, and this one we don't have much.

Speaker 1 Oh, that was a year-own, so that wasn't a face-to-face pick. It was a face to the pick.
No, yeah.

Speaker 1 But trilogies, you only had three picks. No, no, we had it.
Oh, sounds like you just did the... It's okay.
You could show me. I won't take it.

Speaker 1 We have 15 selections. Yeah, we have three.
Okay. And the second one's not as good as those two, but it's great, actually.

Speaker 8 Hank versus the written word.

Speaker 1 And spoken.

Speaker 1 Jason Veritek versus A-Rod.

Speaker 1 Oh. Okay.

Speaker 8 Oh, is that really an asking?

Speaker 5 It was... Was that the same fight where they beat up Don Zimmer?

Speaker 1 Oh, Jake was so upset about the colours. That was so uncomfortable.
He should have come out of the dugout.

Speaker 1 He should have come out of the dugout or not.

Speaker 1 Pedro could stand his ground.

Speaker 8 That was well within his rights.

Speaker 1 There was a record it was not. It was actually different years.

Speaker 8 He beat the shit out of Don Zimmer.

Speaker 1 The old man should not have come out of the dugout.

Speaker 1 That's a fact we can all agree upon.

Speaker 1 That was a tough sight. For anyone.
It was just very tough. For Yankees fans, yeah, you got bodied.

Speaker 3 Yeah, but your old man just got fucking smoked.

Speaker 8 Watching your grandfather get beaten with a stick.

Speaker 1 Yeah, like he's wearing a uniform. How is Pedro supposed to know he wasn't a player?

Speaker 3 Yeah, good point.

Speaker 1 He looked like a player.

Speaker 1 That one, yeah. That one was

Speaker 1 uncouth. Yeah.

Speaker 5 Next, we're going to go with

Speaker 5 Seahawks over Broncos in the Super Bowl.

Speaker 1 Skip pick.

Speaker 5 Skip pick. The only Super Bowl that I can recall from my time of

Speaker 1 Seth and Hank Scott.

Speaker 5 And it was a score of me.

Speaker 1 It was a score of me. 43 to 8.

Speaker 8 Destruction.

Speaker 1 I had a Super Bowl party, and I bet a lot on the Broncos, and I ended that Super Bowl party early.

Speaker 1 Everyone, get out of my house.

Speaker 8 I also had the Broncos in that game. It was like, this is Peyton Manning.
This is Peyton Manning's here.

Speaker 1 His offense is so good. That's when he set the record, right?

Speaker 8 Yeah, and then the first snap of the game was a safety. Yeah.
And it was like, well, this game's over. Yep.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 5 Good pick.

Speaker 5 This next pick, it's fictional.

Speaker 1 Oh.

Speaker 1 What?

Speaker 1 He's already saying it's a bad pick.

Speaker 5 Bob Barker versus Happy Gilmore.

Speaker 1 Oh, okay. That's a good one.
Yeah. Got his ass kicked.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Both people got some fighters.

Speaker 1 Got some licks in there. What did you say?

Speaker 8 Both fighters got some licks in there.

Speaker 1 Did Happy Gilmore die?

Speaker 1 Okay. All right.
Hank, Max, you have nothing left?

Speaker 1 No, let's go with it.

Speaker 1 Let's go. I like it.
Go full send. What's a year? What's a year?

Speaker 1 Georgia Tech. Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 222-0. 222-0.

Speaker 1 The coach said he was trying to get revenge because they lost like 19-0 in a baseball game, which apparently he coached the baseball team on. Oh, nice.

Speaker 1 So it was a football revenge for a baseball game the previous spring. What's your favorite memory from that game? Probably like the 17th or 18th touchdown.

Speaker 7 Cumberland College had negative 96 rushing yards. Oh, that's dispatched.
And negative 82 total yards.

Speaker 8 Do they count sacks and negative rushing yards? Is that why?

Speaker 1 Because

Speaker 1 if not, they didn't count sacks back then.

Speaker 8 Yeah, but that's what I'm saying.

Speaker 5 Like, a sack would count then as an Georgia Tech also had zero passing yards.

Speaker 1 They didn't throw the ball one time. Okay, that is an ass kicking.
Yeah, that is an ass kicking. Okay.

Speaker 1 We have our last two picks. Should we go 14-15?

Speaker 1 What's the one you said we're never going to pick?

Speaker 1 Do you still have it? No, no, no, no.

Speaker 8 Big cat, we should go 15-1.

Speaker 1 Okay, all right, great. Yeah.
All right.

Speaker 8 So I'll do 15? Yeah.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 8 Nolan Ryan versus Robin Ventura. Ass kicking.
Nolan Ryan, the old man. He was, what, like 40, something like that.
Robin Ventura was a spry, like young 20s,

Speaker 8 much bigger than Nolan Ryan. And

Speaker 8 Nolan Ryan just grabbed him in a headlock and beat the shit out of him.

Speaker 1 It was great. Yeah.

Speaker 1 All right. And the one that no one's going to pick, but I do actually think it is a 1-1 ass-kicking.
It is Trump and the Republican debates. Trump versus all the other Republican debates.

Speaker 1 I thought we were pick. No, no, that's not a pander pick at all.
He just fucking smoked.

Speaker 8 Low-type Jeb. He was like, Jeb, Jeb, you're gay.
Chris Christie, you're gay.

Speaker 1 Brand, you're gay and small. And there's a woman here who cares.

Speaker 5 Disgusting.

Speaker 7 You guys would use Trump to try and get votes.

Speaker 1 No, I mean, that was an ass kicking.

Speaker 1 Was it or was it not an ass kicking?

Speaker 8 It was an ass kicking.

Speaker 1 It was the definition of an ass kicking. Take everything out.

Speaker 1 What he did to the other Republicans. He ended all their careers.

Speaker 8 Yeah, Ted Cruz, your wife's ugly.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you're short. Yeah, Ted Cruz, your dad killed James.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Marco Rubio's got a small penis. I don't know.

Speaker 1 Marco Rubio with his tiny, tiny. He just grade school bullied them all.
It was a total ass kicking. Do you not agree, Hank? No, it was.
It's a good fact. It's annihilation.
It's a pretty ass kicking.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 It's us? Yeah, I think so.

Speaker 1 I mean,

Speaker 1 are you stalling, or you don't know if it's you?

Speaker 1 This is big time getting called in class energy. Like, what? No.
I didn't have my hand raised.

Speaker 8 I would say this Mount Rushmore versus Hank and Max.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Come on.

Speaker 1 There's so many other ones. Yeah.
I mean, this one, I'm surprised no one else took this.

Speaker 1 What are we going with? Villanova versus Oklahoma in the Final Four. Oh, yeah.
Who could forget? I was there. We were there too.

Speaker 1 Oh, you guys were there? Yeah, were we?

Speaker 8 Yeah, we shut that up. Was in ass kicking?

Speaker 5 We were. It was the biggest blowout in Final Four history.

Speaker 1 No, we were in the hotel room. Okay, yeah.

Speaker 1 We went to the final in San Antonio because we were in the first place.

Speaker 5 Syracuse played UNC after.

Speaker 5 And that was also a blowout. And then I left early.

Speaker 1 No, Syracuse did not play UNC. They played Michigan.
They played Michigan, I thought.

Speaker 5 If you're thinking of 2013, this is 2016.

Speaker 1 So we weren't there. Nope.

Speaker 1 Wait,

Speaker 1 I was in 20s. I was there.
2016 was Houston. Villanova.
That was Oklahoma.

Speaker 1 What was the one?

Speaker 5 I was there with Kane. Sergeants, Michigan was 2013.

Speaker 1 I was at that game. I don't remember.
Did you think of San Antonio when we were at that game?

Speaker 1 Villanova beat Oklahoma by 44 points. In what year?

Speaker 7 2016.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Right.

Speaker 5 And what? Which was. I think you're thinking of Villanova also won it on 10.
In 2018, they covered every spread by over 10 points.

Speaker 1 You're thinking of 2018.

Speaker 5 But that was Loyola, and Michigan was there, too.

Speaker 1 Everyone remembers 2016.

Speaker 1 Okay. Yeah.

Speaker 8 2018, that was where DiVincenzo went. Such a good pick.

Speaker 1 I can't figure out the year. Okay.
I knew that.

Speaker 1 I knew that. You're a Villanova fan.

Speaker 8 Villanova's kicked a lot of ass.

Speaker 1 All right, so you

Speaker 1 A semifinal game.

Speaker 8 Final four.

Speaker 1 What was the stat you said? Is that not the same?

Speaker 5 I'm going to finish a big blow in a Final Four.

Speaker 1 Got it. Final Four is a pretty big sporting event.
Then

Speaker 1 a lot of teams.

Speaker 1 We had another college basketball game that will say in honorable mentions. Okay.
I'll tell you what it is. Okay.
Also not a final.

Speaker 1 Oh, it was

Speaker 1 something that people would remember more.

Speaker 5 I know what you're thinking.

Speaker 1 Let's finish the picks.

Speaker 5 We're going to go with Joey Chestnut in every Nathan's hot hot dog eating contest.

Speaker 1 Except for the one he lost. So you're picking the one he lost as well.
No.

Speaker 1 He lost multiple ones. Yeah, you can't say every.
You can't say every one that if he lost a couple.

Speaker 5 Okay, 2021 world record, 76. Okay.
Joey Chestnut in the 2021 hot dog eating contest.

Speaker 1 Because he did lose a couple. Okay.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 8 What else we got? Honorable mention time.

Speaker 1 Honorable mention time. We don't have any.
Other college.

Speaker 1 The other college basketball one, which is people forget that as well.

Speaker 1 No. Oh, I thought you were going to say that.
UNBC beat Virginia by 2020.

Speaker 8 Like 20.

Speaker 5 74-54.

Speaker 2 20.

Speaker 1 A 16-over-one wasn't just a flooky upset. I thought they were going to say UNLV versus Duke.
Yeah, that one, too.

Speaker 8 We had Wisconsin versus Will Compton. Yep.
That was an ass kicking. They had like three running backs that had over 150 yards, yes?

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 1 And in unbiased,

Speaker 1 I'm showing them unbiased, Ohio State versus Wisconsin in the Big Ten championship game, 59-0.

Speaker 1 Which we did on purpose because we needed to get a Big Ten team into the title, into the Final Four, and then Ohio State won us. Was that Cardell? Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah.
That was bad.

Speaker 1 I was on a bachelor party with all my college buddies, and we rented a room at the Sports Book, and that sucked. That's tough.

Speaker 8 Yeah. That's tough.

Speaker 8 We had

Speaker 8 SEAL Team 6 versus Osama Bin Laden. Yep.
That was an ass whooping. Yep.

Speaker 1 85 Bears versus Patriots in the Super Bowl. Also, Cowboys versus the Bills in the Super Bowl, the last one.

Speaker 8 Georgia TCU.

Speaker 1 Yep, Georgia TCU this year. 96 bowls just the entire year.

Speaker 1 Mike Tyson, 32nd knockout.

Speaker 1 Yeah, there's a lot of assets. McGregor Aldo.

Speaker 1 What? McGregor Aldo. Yep, that's a good one.

Speaker 5 Anyone beating Cancer.

Speaker 1 Kick Cancer's ass. Neme Sam.
Oklahoma State wrestlers in that bathroom.

Speaker 8 Yeah, that was an ass kicking. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that was an ass kicking.

Speaker 8 Hitler versus the Soviet Union in wintertime. Mm-hmm.

Speaker 1 Wintertime being the ass-kicking.

Speaker 1 What else? Was there any others? Oh, did we say SEALs team six versus some of them? Yeah.

Speaker 8 Yeah. That was an ass-kicking.
Mike Tyson.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 8 Just take your pick.

Speaker 1 There's some good ones.

Speaker 1 Jake versus Hank and Ping Pong.

Speaker 8 Yeah, that was an ass kicking.

Speaker 1 That was close. That was like not even 18.
I kicked his ass.

Speaker 1 He kicked your ass.

Speaker 1 Jake versus my back. Jake versus your back.

Speaker 1 Max versus happiness.

Speaker 8 Max versus first play.

Speaker 1 That sounded personal.

Speaker 5 Max wasn't very happy the night before the Super Bowl.

Speaker 2 That's true.

Speaker 1 He was. Jake.
Good point.

Speaker 1 Good point. All of us versus happiness, really.

Speaker 1 Except Hank. Pretty much everyone versus happiness.
Sports happiness. It's an ass kicking every single year.
That's okay.

Speaker 1 Okay. Oh, also,

Speaker 1 what was the year? Was it the Lakers one year only lost once in

Speaker 1 one of the Shaq Kobe years?

Speaker 8 Oh, I was good.

Speaker 8 The Pistons versus the Lakers. The Pistons kicked their ass in the finals.
That was the gentleman's sweep, right?

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah. The Lakers versus the Nuggets this year, but the Lakers kicked the Nuggets ass if you didn't count the games.

Speaker 8 Yep.

Speaker 1 All right, good Mount Rushmore. Feel good about that one.

Speaker 1 Any other last ones? No? All right.

Speaker 13 Hey, this is Rhea from Chicks in the Office, and this season, we're heading home for the holidays with Abercrombie and Fitch. We all know our calendars are about to get chaotic.

Speaker 13 For non-stop plans, Abercrombie has the pieces to curate your perfect seasonal wardrobe, sweaters and denim for casual plans, party dresses for nights out, and comfy matching sets for everything in between.

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Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Let's wrap up the show with a little fire fest. Big week of guests coming to next week.
We've got some work we've got to do tomorrow.

Speaker 1 And I think we're going to have our good friend Tom Fernelli stop in the studio at some point next week.

Speaker 8 Very excited about this.

Speaker 1 College football.

Speaker 1 What? That's awesome. Yeah, you need to be Tom in the same room.

Speaker 8 Why do we need Tom if we got Hank?

Speaker 1 Yeah, I might not be there that day. Okay.
Okay. Interesting.

Speaker 1 Okay. Hank.

Speaker 3 Fire Fest.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I alluded to this earlier.

Speaker 1 But this is really just a testament to our friend Paul Bissonette just being a great guy because it could have been a much bigger Fire Fest.

Speaker 1 Was out after the awards at a bar, was in a lift, came back to the hotel. Biz and Grinnell were hanging out, steaming some lettuce, yapping it up.

Speaker 1 Vitamins? Got out of the lift. Got out of the lift and

Speaker 1 was chatting it up with them. And they're like, oh, Biz was like, there's a bar down the street.
So we were about to go. And then I realized I left my phone in the lift.

Speaker 1 And I was like, fuck, I think I can go get my laptop and log in there to try and get it back. It's young hate me.
And Grinnell and Biz

Speaker 1 were like, no, we'll call it. We'll call it.
We'll get it back. Like, we'll wait for it.
And they called a few times, didn't answer. And Biz was like, I'm going to go to bed.
And he went upstairs.

Speaker 1 Finally, Grinnell last call.

Speaker 1 The guy answers, comes back, gave him some cash, got my phone back. So it wasn't too bad of a situation.
Could have been a lot worse. But an hour later in my hotel, Biz kept calling

Speaker 1 just as a guy to try and help me get my phone back. So he called and I was like, hello? He's like, oh, you got it back.
I was like, yeah. I was like, thanks, Biz.

Speaker 1 It was just a very, very, very nice thing to do. Ride or die.

Speaker 8 You think Biz forgot that you got your phone back? And that's what I'm saying. No, he didn't.

Speaker 1 No, he went upstairs. So he was like, all right, good night.
Good luck. Went upstairs.
And then Grinnell, literally, as we're walking into the hotel, we were going to the elevators.

Speaker 1 He called one last time and he answered and we went and got it. Biz wasn't there for that.
Got it.

Speaker 1 So Biz just kept, was just sitting in his hotel room at 1 a.m., just like trying to help me get my phone back. Just class act, class guy.

Speaker 3 Yeah,

Speaker 8 he didn't have to do that.

Speaker 1 He didn't. Like, when I got the call, I was like, it was, it was like an hour and a half later.
And I was like, hello? He's like, oh, you got it back.

Speaker 1 I was just trying to, you know, just trying to reach the guy. What a move.
I was like, thanks, thanks, Biz. You're the man.
Yeah. Yeah.
Good guy. That is a great guy.
Great guy. Ride or die.

Speaker 1 Locker room guy. Can't wait for the Tuqua interview.
Yeah, very excited about that.

Speaker 1 We just did it.

Speaker 1 Let's put out that whole clip.

Speaker 1 R.A. P.F.T.

Speaker 8 My Fire Fest of the Week, it goes back to last Saturday. So last Saturday,

Speaker 8 went over to Hank's,

Speaker 8 went over to Hank's apartment, which is wonderful. Condo, excuse me.

Speaker 8 It overlooks Lake Michigan, and they had the Air and Water Show in Chicago, which was a blast. It was fucking awesome.
The planes were incredible. Oh, yeah.

Speaker 8 It was bad. It's bad.
And I'm just out there on the balcony like a two-year-old watching these planes, like a two-year-old that sees a fire truck going down the street.

Speaker 8 That was me for like two hours, just like cheering for the planes. I was like, let's fucking go, planes.
Yes.

Speaker 8 Take a video, and I wanted to share the video on social media. And the video was one of the coolest parts of the show where the planes like flew past Hank's condo, converged, flew away.

Speaker 8 I put out the video and I was maybe flexing a little bit bit of my play knowledge at the time.

Speaker 8 Trying to flex. Trying to flex.
Trying to flex. And I said, look at these sweet third-generation air-to-air and air-to-ground dual-use combat third-generation F-18 Hornets.

Speaker 1 How awesome is that?

Speaker 8 About 30 seconds later, I realized that those were not F-18 Hornets at all. And they were the F-16 Eagles.
They don't even look alike at all. One is dual-engine, one is single-engine.

Speaker 8 The wings look completely different. It was a rookie mistake, and

Speaker 8 I've just been exposed for being a plane fraud. And I feel,

Speaker 8 I mean, what else can I say? I'm a fucking fraud. If I can't tell the difference between F-16 and F-18, plane Twitter was very, very upset with me saying I don't know ball.

Speaker 1 It was like day one stuff.

Speaker 8 It was day one. It is.

Speaker 1 You learn that flight school.

Speaker 8 It's day zero stuff if you're going to get into a plane.

Speaker 8 And so I just, I got to start training for next year's Aaron Waters show so I don't make the same rookie mistake again because it's it's fucking embarrassing. That is.
It really is.

Speaker 8 That's super embarrassing. It'd be like if I had a picture of a football and it had the white stripes on it, and I was like, Look at this, look at this authentic game-used NFL football.

Speaker 8 You know, like people be like, Yo, bro, that's college football. You should think of a mistake.

Speaker 1 You should just not admit defeat and just argue with everyone. Like, what's that guy's name, Stephen Ruiz, who got in a fight with Mitchell Schwartz about coverage, about protection?

Speaker 1 Yeah, he's like, You're literally arguing with a guy who played for the Kansas City Chiefs and won a Super Bowl. Like, just keep going.

Speaker 8 Yeah, just double down.

Speaker 1 You don't know what you're talking about.

Speaker 8 Actually, that's the brand new F-18Z Hornet

Speaker 8 that you probably haven't even seen yet, but only I've seen it.

Speaker 1 Some like 20-year military vets, like, you're wrong, PFD. Like, no, you're wrong.
What would you know?

Speaker 1 I watched the tape.

Speaker 8 Yeah, it was just a real, it was a humbling moment, especially for me. Like, I profess to be a plane guy, and I've just been exposed as being a complete and utter fraud when it comes to it.

Speaker 8 I own both of those planes, by the way.

Speaker 1 It was a day ruiner.

Speaker 8 It was a day ruiner. I sat down and I was like, oh, no, what have I done?

Speaker 8 So, yeah, I'm a fraud. I'm a plane fraud.

Speaker 1 Yeah. All right.
Mine goes back to what we were talking about with us dressing up.

Speaker 1 We were here for the award show. I ordered a suit, MB, who does a great job for us.
She's the best.

Speaker 1 Asked for my suit measurements. I'm a 38-year-old man who doesn't know his suit measurements.
So I guessed on everything, and it was so off.

Speaker 1 It was all.

Speaker 1 I guess it's good that I guessed like bigger because I've never put on a suit that didn't fit the other way, but it didn't fit the other way. And then I had like Tracy McGrady.
Yeah, it was crazy.

Speaker 1 The coat was like, you could have fit me and Max in the coat. It was insane.
And then... Would you say like 50? I think I said 50.

Speaker 1 I think I said 52, maybe. It's crazy.
It was an insane, insane misjudgment by me. And then I had to buy a new suit and I have...
Daniela, who is great, also works at Barstool, help me with that.

Speaker 1 And I showed up to the suit store and the guys asked me all these questions like, what style do you like and I was like dude I just need a fucking suit I don't really understand this it cost me a thousand bucks I probably will never wear it again I'm just not a suit guy and I feel like

Speaker 1 we we don't have to wear suits we get to wear we get to dress like slobs and that's one of the perks of this job but it is a little embarrassing to be 38 years old and not know any of this stuff.

Speaker 8 No, I don't know any of that. Absolutely not.
You know how many different numbers you have to know for your suit size? There's like five different things. You have to know inseam.

Speaker 8 You have to know like shoulder.

Speaker 1 you have to know chest you have to know arm length who can keep track of all that stuff the the i actually would have if if mb didn't correct me at the first time like it was the suit coat was too big uh like it basically i could wrap it all the way around me but i also sent in my sleeves and i was like i think i'm a 26 and she was like well just a heads up everyone else is ordered in the 30s and i was like oh okay so i don't think i'm a 26.

Speaker 1 i could have i could have had the funniest suit ever if i had just gone with 26 52. Yeah.
It would have just been insane proportions. So, yeah, I don't know.
I feel like

Speaker 1 I'm a semi-responsible adult, but this is one of those things that

Speaker 1 I can't tie a bow tie.

Speaker 8 I can tie a regular tie. Nobody knows how to tie it.

Speaker 1 I don't know any kind of fashion. I don't know what looks or what, what cuts or what, any of that.
And I don't...

Speaker 1 I'm okay with it, but when those little, like probably once every couple of years, it pops up and I just feel like such an idiot.

Speaker 1 And I'm like, man, I could probably take like two seconds go to a tailor get myself measured learn like three facts and be good and I just don't do it it's like ring size when they ask us ring size we're like just normal I guess I have normal fingers XL yeah I've got all XL I mean who knows like are we expected do most guys is that something most people in their 30s know walking around with all their suit measurements I think they do I think just I don't think so I think the average guy wears a suit more than we do that has to be the case that's probably true that's not the case

Speaker 8 well no but no no no because you have here's, I think the sweet spot for knowing what size suit you wear is probably in your late 20s, early 30s when it's weddings on weddings and weddings every single summer.

Speaker 8 Now we're old enough where it's like there might be one wedding or two weddings each year we go to, but it's not like every free weekend that we have is spent watching a friend get married.

Speaker 8 So you kind of lose track. You just use suits that you used to wear in the past.

Speaker 1 And then it gets depressing because then your suits turn into funeral suits. And now I have

Speaker 1 funeral suits that's a light blue summer suit for the track.

Speaker 8 And also they they just don't fit anymore. It's like I'll wear that suit that I wore three years ago for a wedding when I was in much better shape.

Speaker 1 Yeah. I also, yeah, I tried to justify the $1,000 purchase.
I was like, well, I'll wear this when I go to the track and lose even more money.

Speaker 8 You knew I had a great suit last night. Henry Lockwood.
Yeah, I did. That was good.

Speaker 1 I like it.

Speaker 1 It was also good to kind of weed out the non-OGs who are like, oh, Hank looks like shit. Why does he have duct tape? Like, dude, read a book, dude.
Watch an internet video.

Speaker 1 video biggest contribution by this company duct tape to the wall we did that they did that so wrong the duct tape challenge yeah the video i was someone was asking me about it and i was like the original video that the challenge was supposed to be can you get someone to hang on the wall with one roll of duct tape they even feats uh

Speaker 1 just did it with infinity rolls of duct tape so they used like five rolls of duct tape and then obviously i was able to stand and then by the time they realized it like they put out a picture of me fully duct tape to the wall losing circulation of my arm.

Speaker 1 And people were like, you guys know it's a one-duct tape roll challenge. That's the whole thing.

Speaker 8 Is it possible?

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 1 I broke out after that, and we never tried again.

Speaker 3 Hey, almost died.

Speaker 8 Is that like when you cover your body in paint? Like when fans get dressed up and it suffocates their skin?

Speaker 1 It was just, there was just, there was no circulation. You couldn't move my hand.

Speaker 8 You were like, Jesus up on that wall.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I was getting purple. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay. Good show, boys.
Everyone have a great weekend. College football is back.

Speaker 1 Numbers.

Speaker 1 Memes, have you ever gotten it?

Speaker 1 Eight. Non-Earth trilogies.
20.

Speaker 1 Oops. Ogle 69.

Speaker 1 One for memes.

Speaker 1 28.

Speaker 1 28.

Speaker 8 28. So close, Max.
28.

Speaker 1 Love you guys. Corey Davis was the fifth pick in the NFL draft.

Speaker 1 And he's not very good. No, he's definitely not very good.
The very waste. Very good is Pro Bowl.

Speaker 8 I feel like he had a couple good seasons for the Titans, but very good. Not very good anyway.

Speaker 1 Memes is drinking the Kool-Aid so much that he's got every guy on the roster being very good. I mean, Hard Knocks is a joke.

Speaker 1 Memes is a joke. Memes is a joke.

Speaker 1 I'll be coming for your love of kids. I'll become your lover, K.

Speaker 1 I'm I'll become for your lover king. Take on

Speaker 1 me.

Speaker 1 Take

Speaker 1 me on.

Speaker 1 I'll be gone.

Speaker 1 And I'll try.

Speaker 1 Need what you say.

Speaker 1 I've all said it about being stolen.

Speaker 1 Telling them the body is up here. Say unto me.

Speaker 1 It's my better to be safe than sorry. It's for better to be safe than sorry.
It's my better to be safe than sorry.

Speaker 1 Take on me.

Speaker 1 Take

Speaker 1 me up.

Speaker 1 I'll be gone

Speaker 1 in a day.

Speaker 1 Hey, the stars it's Friday. I'm burning like a fire gone wild on Saturday.

Speaker 1 Guess I won't be coming to church on Sunday.

Speaker 1 I'll be waiting for love,

Speaker 1 waiting for love to come around.

Speaker 1 How things that you say

Speaker 1 I've bought just to play my worries away.

Speaker 1 You're all the things I've got to remember. You shine all up.
I'll be coming for you anyway.

Speaker 1 Day

Speaker 1 on me.

Speaker 1 I

Speaker 1 am