Braves First Baseman Matt Olson, Barstool Is Independent Again, Hard Knocks Episode 1, Mt Rushmore Of Rookie Mistakes And Roasts With Uncle Chaps

2h 18m

Packed show today and we talk about the news of Barstool being independent again (00:00:00-00:09:57). Hard Knocks episode 1 and Aaron Rodgers has never looked happier in his life (00:09:57-00:23:28). Hot Seat/Cool Throne including a rant by Jake about the Baltimore Orioles broadcast team (00:23:28-00:55:14). Braves first baseman Matt Olson joins us in studio to talk baseball, hitting dingers, Blooper, dressing as us for Halloween, getting traded to his hometown team and more (00:55:14-01:41:48). Mt Rushmore of rookie mistakes and we finish the show with roasts from Uncle Chaps (01:41:48-02:14:21).


You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/pardon-my-take

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Runtime: 2h 18m

Transcript

Speaker 1 Hey, pardon my take, listeners. You can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube.
Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music.

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Speaker 1 On today's part of my take, we have an awesome, awesome interview with first baseman from the Atlanta Braves, Matt Olson. In-person interview.
He came by the studio Friday night.

Speaker 1 Latest interview we've ever done.

Speaker 1 We have Mr. Positions using every position on John Angelos and going on a rant that is must-listen.

Speaker 1 Mount Rushmore of rookie mistakes. Uncle Chaps doing roasts.
This is a pack show. And then also there was some news today that we'll discuss.

Speaker 1 Barstool is independent again, so we'll get to that as well.

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Speaker 1 Okay, let's go.

Speaker 1 Now in the street, there is violence.

Speaker 1 And then I like the solid work to be done.

Speaker 1 No place to hang out or washing.

Speaker 1 And then I can't blame all of the sun. Oh no, we're gonna ride it down to

Speaker 1 It's part of my take.

Speaker 1 Welcome to part of my take. Today is Wednesday, August 9th, and football is back.

Speaker 7 Hard knocks, baby. Hard knocks.
A tradition like unlike any other. We get super pumped up.
We watch football football is on our screen. We enjoy it.
And then, oh, yeah, not a lot goes on.

Speaker 7 We already saw most everything that happened. But it was cool to see behind the scenes the Nathaniel Hackett stuff, him with Aaron Rodgers and how they reacted to Sean Payton comments and all that.

Speaker 7 That part was kind of cool. I like that.

Speaker 1 Yes, yes. So football is back.
Let's talk hard knocks in a minute. We should probably address the big news today.

Speaker 1 Mincey's back. Yeah.
So if you are living under a rock or if you only listen to the show, first of all, all, thank you. That means you're a wonderful AWL.

Speaker 1 It was announced today that Penn, who owned us, Barstool Sports, has sold Barstool Sports back to us, back to Dave.

Speaker 1 They are creating a new app or yeah, in conjunction with ESPN, ESPN Bets.

Speaker 1 Penn, wonderful people. Jay Snowden will be a friend for life.
They changed my life. They changed all of our lives.
But the big news is that Barstool is back to being independent. So it's pretty cool.

Speaker 1 It's been a crazy 20 years for Barstool. I think the 20th anniversary is coming up in a couple weeks.
It's been, you know, we've been doing this show for seven, eight years.

Speaker 1 We are back to independent, back to the pirate ship. I think it's a deal that works out for everyone very well.

Speaker 1 We, listen, can't lose parlay. People saw what happened with that.
Turns out regulators maybe don't love Barstool, don't love us. And I get that.
It totally makes sense.

Speaker 1 I think Penn had the same thought. Like, hey, we thought this was going to work out maybe a little better with regulators.
It didn't. So we are back to being ourselves independent.

Speaker 1 And Penn is going to be doing something with ESPN and ESPN bets. And I think it's going to be wildly successful because Penn has some really incredible people.

Speaker 1 But yeah, we are back to being independent. The pirate ship goes back out there into the ocean.

Speaker 1 I did see some people being like, oh, can you guys now like do stuff you didn't do? I don't think we changed anything under Penn. I truly don't.

Speaker 1 Like, I know people will, yes, there was different ways that we had to talk about gambling.

Speaker 1 Gambling regulators were stringent, but like in terms of the content of this show, I don't think we changed anything. Did we, PFT?

Speaker 7 We were going to do instead of piss dog shit cats at one point. And that's Jay Snowden said, hey, I don't know if we can go that far with you guys.
Maybe dial it back, just keep it number one only.

Speaker 1 I have one, too. I have one.
Wait, hold on. Before you say yours, PFT, or Hank, PFT, I'm sure you got the same thing of people being like piss dogs dogs back.

Speaker 1 They're just completely not realizing that both you and I have pissed our pants on camera in the last six months. Yeah.
Multiple times. So it's like, I don't really know what I

Speaker 7 pissed my pants within the last three weeks.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I love our fans are the best fans in the world. I know everyone says that, but I truly do believe that.
They ride and die with us through thick and thin. They're always behind us.

Speaker 1 We have a dream job because of the people that listen and support us. And that never is lost on me never ever ever but i will say too

Speaker 1 we have not really changed that much we've been pissing our pants right i i would love to come back and say like oh i'm so glad because we get to really let everything fly that we haven't been but we've i don't think we've dialed anything back at all uh yeah it's just been it's been how we've talked about gambling which i understand that was part of the the rules and it made sense for to to make sure that we talked about gambling the correct way under pen and even when we did that and we were very there was a lot of people who who did a really good job of making sure everything was cleared with the gambling stuff.

Speaker 1 And still, we ran into the issues with the regulators. I think that was kind of the eye-opening moment for all parties.

Speaker 1 And so, yeah, I don't think the content has changed on this show specifically at all. And it won't, and it will keep going forward.
But it is fucking awesome that we're the pirate ship again.

Speaker 1 Hank.

Speaker 4 Yes, there was that, it was 2020, there was the leaf blower video of the person blowing a leaf blower full of weed around a room.

Speaker 4 You guys told me to do it. I got a pound of weed.

Speaker 1 I acquired a pound of weed to do the video in the studio.

Speaker 4 And then you guys were like, well, we're about to sell the pen, so you can't do it. So then I had to hold on to this pound of weed.

Speaker 1 Oh, no. Do you still have the pound?

Speaker 4 No, it was gone

Speaker 1 probably

Speaker 1 like June.

Speaker 1 It was cool. Okay, so we can do that video.
There's nothing else to do.

Speaker 4 Well, yeah, I retired, but that was one thing that, you know, pen stopped from happening.

Speaker 1 could do that video back, Hank.

Speaker 7 Along those same lines, I've been angling to get a brand of pre-rolls put out there called just mids, just call them mids, just average weed.

Speaker 7 And I've been going for it, and they keep saying, No, we can't do that because it's uh sanctioning drug use, which I totally understand. But now, maybe that's something we can get into.

Speaker 7 Yeah, maybe put out our own weed strand.

Speaker 1 Maybe the idea that we had the other day we could do

Speaker 1 of me, PFT, and Hank doing a three-man scramble after eating mushrooms, and we try to beat Jake, who's dressed as Toad.

Speaker 7 Max's Mario, I think we said.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Max has to chase him around. Yeah, but no, so like overall, yeah, it's a great thing.

Speaker 1 Jake is toad is going to be hilarious, but yeah, everything has.

Speaker 1 I know that people will try to think deeper into all this stuff, but I really do think that both parties are going to be very successful. And I think ESPN Beths is going to crush.

Speaker 1 And I know the people at Penn very well, and they're all very, very smart. And this was kind of a thing where it's like, hey, we know that the regulators are going to keep coming for us.

Speaker 1 And it's going to be, we're going to play by different rules. And we thought it was going to work.
And it didn't work exactly how we thought. It still worked.

Speaker 1 It was still successful for a lot of the things. But yeah, that we are the pirate ship again.
So I do. Jake's toad is coming.

Speaker 7 I do think it's the rare win-win-win.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 7 I think, like, I'm happy. I think Penn's happy.
I think ESPN's happy. I think everybody's happy.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 we're all happy.

Speaker 7 It's good stuff.

Speaker 7 Speaking of piss dogs, I just want to share this story real quick because I'm raising a dog, Blake, right?

Speaker 7 And Blake is about three and a half months old, potty training him, doing really well for the most part. I went in to take a piss.
He likes to follow me into the bathroom to watch me pee.

Speaker 7 Today, he just followed me into the bathroom as I'm pissing, and he sees me peeing, and he's standing right behind me, and he starts pissing right onto the bath mat, onto the bathroom floor.

Speaker 7 He's a piss dog, bro. Absolutely rocks.
I loved it.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but not trained.

Speaker 7 Not trained. Not yet.
Not yet.

Speaker 1 We're working on that. It's a process.
It's a process. Trust the process.

Speaker 1 Right, Max? Isn't that what you always say?

Speaker 1 He's just nodding because he knows that if he unmutes his mic, we're going to be like, and how'd the process go? And then he's going to be like,

Speaker 1 we're going to trust it.

Speaker 1 All right. Should we talk? Should we talk some football? Should we talk some hard knocks? I'll just start with the fact that I'm not even doing a bit right now.
I've never seen Aaron Rodgers happier.

Speaker 1 He looks so happy. He looks so relaxed.
I'm so happy for him. It is great.
It's like someone getting away from an evil, evil empire.

Speaker 1 He's essentially been,

Speaker 1 you know, he's gotten his...

Speaker 1 What am I looking for? What's the word? It's late at night.

Speaker 1 Mojo? Swagger. Mojo.

Speaker 1 It's like calisthenics. What are cackles?

Speaker 7 Well, I was going to say it's like

Speaker 7 it's like an orca in captivity with a curved fin.

Speaker 7 Now it's out

Speaker 7 in the ocean, dorsal fin straight up.

Speaker 1 Shackles. Yeah, by the way, side tangent, Lolita being 50 years old, like that is,

Speaker 1 that orca is going to go in the ocean and die right away, right?

Speaker 7 It might be just too much.

Speaker 1 It's never making it to the ocean.

Speaker 1 It's Brooks from Shawshank. Lolita is going to end up in the ocean and be like, what the fuck? I had a pretty good life.

Speaker 7 The ocean wouldn't have got itself in a big damn hurry.

Speaker 1 Yeah, fuck. He's going to be like, I have to find food now or she.
So, yeah, that's a side tangent about Jim Ursa.

Speaker 1 Yeah,

Speaker 1 Aaron Rodgers, the shackles are off. He looks like he'll be himself.
He changed his number. He looks happy.

Speaker 1 And his quarterback coach, this new up-and-coming guy who I've never seen in the NFL before, what's his name? He has a big beard,

Speaker 7 jacket.

Speaker 7 I think his name's Nate Hackett.

Speaker 1 Nate Hackett. Yeah, I'd never seen him before.
That guy looks like a smart guy.

Speaker 7 I, he, I think he's future head coach material. Just the way that you, it's, it tells you a lot the way that you can get along with a star quarterback if you have that trust.

Speaker 7 That guy's a rising star, a guy to keep an eye on in the NFL.

Speaker 7 He's got to learn some stuff probably about like clock management, timeouts, end-of-game stuff, stuff you don't get to experience as a quarterback coach or really an offensive coordinator sometimes.

Speaker 7 But once he gets that under his belt, I think he's going to, he's going to turn some heads.

Speaker 1 He, he was, he also, by the way, has an ass i think yeah he does i think he grew his ass out a little bit this offseason yeah he he was very smart to go with uh the new facial hair he reminded me of like a duke player a plumly going to the nba and getting some tattoos and a new haircut like hey that's that was the old me i'm i'm i'm nate hackett now i look like i have a chop i drive a chopper to work and he looked jacked and he was out there having fun he looks like such a fun guy i kind of want to get him on pmt yeah we should interview him the gold member stuff i bet he's got some great stories about blake bordles He's Coach M.

Speaker 1 Yes, yes.

Speaker 1 What other things?

Speaker 7 My personal big takeaway was that crows are dumb as shit. Yeah.

Speaker 7 Did you hear the opening monologue that Robert Sala gave?

Speaker 7 So he sat the players down, gave them an animal fact at the start, which is that crows are the only animal, the only bird that attacks eagles, and that eagles, to defend themselves from crows, let the crow land on their back, then they fly straight up, and then the crow suffocates to death and falls off and crashes to the earth.

Speaker 7 Crows are so fucking dumb. This is

Speaker 1 an Iron Man.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I think it did too.

Speaker 7 I think it did, too. It's a miracle that crows ever.
I mean, this is one of the things that we probably can't go off on, or we couldn't go off on when Penn own us, but fuck crows.

Speaker 1 Like, crows have ever been claimed.

Speaker 7 I don't know what it is, but I've been told my whole life that crows are the smartest bird in the world.

Speaker 7 And it's a miracle that they ever get out of bed in the morning without stabbing themselves in the butthole with their own beak because they're so stupid that they just hold on to the back of an eagle and die of not being able to breathe.

Speaker 1 And they're bad vibes. You see a crow, it's bad vibes.
That's not a good vibes bird.

Speaker 1 That's a bad, like you see a blue jay, you see an Oriole, you see a cardinal, you're like, ooh, I'm gonna stare at that out of my back porch.

Speaker 1 You see a crow and you're like, wait, death is around the corner. They are bad vibe birds.

Speaker 7 They're called a murder of crows for a reason. But the message behind that was: if you ain't got no haters, you ain't popping.

Speaker 7 So Salah was saying that the crows are the haters, us, us the media and that the eagles are actually the jets which means that they're going to fish in second this year but they're just flying like i don't know they're flying all the crows off their back yeah um it is funny that there will be like a few people who are like man finally they can say crows yeah

Speaker 1 they never were able to say that before uh other things i don't know if you guys saw my tweet So if you did, don't answer this. But how old is Randall Cobb?

Speaker 7 Oh, yeah, you brought this up last year, I think. He's young.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I bring it up every year. He is 32.
He's 32 years old.

Speaker 1 He's going to be 33 in a couple of weeks. You did see it? I did not.
Oh, okay. 32 years old.
Randall Cobb, like when I saw him in this, I was like, holy shit, he's still in the league.

Speaker 1 And then I reminded myself, like, oh, wait, he's 32 years old. And he feels like he's been in the league for 10 million years.

Speaker 7 Yeah, that would mean he's been the league for what, this is his 12th season coming up.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's crazy.

Speaker 7 That is crazy. He's one of those one of those like late babies.
When you're born in late August, early September, you're kind of on that cutoff sometimes on which grade you're going to be in.

Speaker 7 All the kids that were born like September 1st, September 2nd were the best at sports in high school.

Speaker 1 I'm dealing with that right now on the home front because my son was born in June and I'm like, let's hold him back for a year.

Speaker 1 My wife's like, why? I was like, because of sports. She's like, that's not a reason.
No, it is. But it is.

Speaker 7 It is a great reason.

Speaker 1 I don't think you can do June, though. It's way too, it's way like, if I could, I would hold back a a kid who, like, if my kid was born in March, I'd be like, let's hold him back.
Yeah.

Speaker 7 You just purposely don't teach him how to read so he feels kindergarten.

Speaker 7 We got a repeat.

Speaker 1 And then he's the first kid to hit five feet tall when he's like, when he's like, you know, in fifth grade, just dominating basketball. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Probably gets to play quarterback. Listen, that could shape a child.

Speaker 1 Even he's not going to end up being a great athlete, but if he was just a great athlete for a couple of years, that could change everything.

Speaker 7 Yeah. If you are a true sports dad, you should only conceive a child on with a New Year's baby.
New Year's Eve is when football guys.

Speaker 1 No, it's um, no, September, I think you can hold them back for a full year,

Speaker 7 so yeah, so New Year's, yeah, New Year's.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah, you're right, yeah, conceive on New Year's, yeah, you have them in September.

Speaker 4 Um, I've told the story, but I played three years of Little League because of a changeback rule, and it was the peak of my athletic achievement.

Speaker 1 I was 13.

Speaker 1 You was a human.

Speaker 4 I was 13 years old, six feet tall, throwing no hitters every game.

Speaker 1 It was the best. That's awesome.
That rules. Like every parent should aspire to that.
That, like, hey, let's be honest here. Let's just break it down.

Speaker 1 They're not going to be a college athlete, a pro-athlete. Why not just let them dominate when they're fucking in sixth grade?

Speaker 1 Like, they'll just let them go crazy in sixth grade and they'll have that forever.

Speaker 7 Maybe get a college scholarship out of it. Who knows? Chake, can you actually set a reminder on the calendar? Remind me to have sex on New Year's Eve.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 8 Also, with football coming up, I took a little preview look. Week one, I have some crazy reminders.

Speaker 1 Anyway, it's on available.

Speaker 1 Can you give us a couple?

Speaker 1 Just a couple teases. Just a tease.

Speaker 8 Don't let Big Cat believe in Carson Wentz if he starts.

Speaker 1 We'll talk about that. Okay, well, that's that's yeah, we'll talk about that later, and that's solved itself.

Speaker 8 If a bad team is good in the first week of three weeks of the season, just wait.

Speaker 7 I'm not going to do that.

Speaker 1 I'm not going to do that. Nope.

Speaker 1 These are all very smart thoughts.

Speaker 8 The Colts haven't won in nine straight week ones.

Speaker 1 Ooh, but Anthony Richardson's lighting it up.

Speaker 4 And you're season ticket holders now.

Speaker 1 And you're season ticket holders. Fuck.

Speaker 1 That's a we're going week one.

Speaker 4 Like, that's like we're betting on the Colts week one stat.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we have to.

Speaker 4 Water always finds level.

Speaker 1 Reminds me they've gotten DFT to take Patrick Mahomes with the AFC West.

Speaker 1 Okay. Who Patrick Wahomes, yeah.
So one thing I had the first can't lose parlay. Oh, it's going to slap.

Speaker 7 One One thing I'm learning from Jake's notes here, we're smart. We're just dumb.

Speaker 1 Right. No,

Speaker 1 we are emotional men. Yeah.
We are knee-jerk reaction, hard-on-the-sleeve men who, in the moment, can't really get ourselves out of a wet paper bag.

Speaker 1 But with hindsight and a little bit of distance, we have some really good thoughts.

Speaker 7 Yeah, no, we get it. We know ball, but just, yeah, you're right.
In the moment, like football is an emotion. You get caught up in it.

Speaker 1 Like, I can't wait till

Speaker 1 like the, like, the Chiefs are going to go up seven to nothing, and I'm going to live bet the Chiefs at like minus 300, and they're going to lose the game.

Speaker 1 Like, I'm like, the Chiefs will never lose the best team ever. So, yeah, that will happen.
That will absolutely happen.

Speaker 1 Also, can you set a reminder for me, Jake?

Speaker 1 Now, I've talked to Max about this.

Speaker 1 I am stuck in a situation because I don't want to root for the Eagles like I did last year again because I just don't want to do that again that was it that took enough out of me but I do think the Eagles what's the Eagles schedule there's a spot PFT we got to do this together maybe with our Twitter payouts we can do this which shout out Elon those are starting to hit

Speaker 1 PFT or Jake set a reminder for me and PFT to put a future on the Eagles

Speaker 1 on

Speaker 1 December 11th. They have a stretch where they play the Cowboys, Chiefs, Chiefs, Bills, Niners, and Cowboys.
That price is going to go.

Speaker 1 That's going to be when we strike. That's going to be when we strike, PFT.
That's going to be when we strike.

Speaker 7 Also, Jake sent a reminder for week one to disregard all the other memoirs.

Speaker 1 When they lose week one, we'll check the price. I just can't, and this is something that

Speaker 1 it sucks to admit, but I can't. I think I will probably have to bet the Eagles to win the Super Bowl for the rest of my life chasing that 22 to 1.

Speaker 1 Because if they win it this year and I don't have a bet, I will be so, so upset. So, yeah,

Speaker 1 I'm just stuck. And I won't talk about it like I did last year because I'll just put it in and just forget it.

Speaker 1 But I just know that probably until the Eagles win their next Super Bowl, I have a future on them.

Speaker 1 So it could be like 50 years and I'd be like, still 22 to 1 going to make it back.

Speaker 7 I'm a team player. I put eight grand on the Eagles to win the Super Bowl because I couldn't root against Big Cat to lose

Speaker 7 $220,000 or whatever. But

Speaker 7 I don't think I can put a future on the Eagles in good conscience.

Speaker 4 Yeah, I lost too much last year, too.

Speaker 7 It just goes against every fire. It's not like I despise the Eagles.
I mostly despise... I've grown up despising my own team more than anything, but still, every man has a line.

Speaker 7 I can't put a future on Division.

Speaker 1 Wait for December 11th. Wait for December 11th when they're popping it like 12 to 1.
We're like, ooh. Watch out.

Speaker 1 We'll have to just put Max in a fucking Hannibal Lecter suit the day before the Super Bowl. We'll be wheeling him around in Las Vegas, and he'll have a fucking gip mask on and everything.

Speaker 1 Just be like, you can't drink anything. You can't do anything.
Just wheeling him.

Speaker 7 I actually think that for Max's own good, he shouldn't be allowed to go to the Super Bowl if the Eagles are in it.

Speaker 1 Oh, no,

Speaker 1 he's going, and we're doing the same deal, and he's going to sit front row. I want like $20,000 tickets this time.

Speaker 1 I want even way, and I'm going to root against the Eagles.

Speaker 1 Play the hits, run it back.

Speaker 1 Okay, other things. Yeah, hard knocks overall, like nothing really happened, but it's just the best feeling in early August to see that music, Leve Schreiber showing up.

Speaker 1 Like, there's just nothing better. Oh, oh, I had one other thing.
Sauce Gardner and Aaron Rodgers have a very cool handshake.

Speaker 7 Yeah, the smoke.

Speaker 1 It's like a triangle and then the smoke.

Speaker 7 Yeah, it's pretty sick.

Speaker 7 I actually agree with you on Aaron Rodgers. I think he does look happy.

Speaker 7 Like, watching him when Leve Schreiber, well, from the selectively edited 15 minutes of content that was approved by the team, Aaron seems like a great guy and a great football player.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he's a great fucking guy, great football player. I've always loved Aaron Rodgers this year.

Speaker 1 That's a fact.

Speaker 1 You can't dispute that fact.

Speaker 7 This season.

Speaker 1 Yeah,

Speaker 1 this season. Well, no, because he lost to the Lions this year, too.

Speaker 1 2023, I've been a big Aaron Rodgers fan overall.

Speaker 1 Last thing,

Speaker 1 Colin Coward released his list of quarterbacks who can't win a a super bowl and he said dwayne haskins can't

Speaker 1 um fact check

Speaker 7 i guess technically true yeah what a did he ever apologize for that or say anything i don't know i don't know that's uh it's a pretty bad take on his part i don't think he did it on purpose i actually which is maybe more of an indictment on colin coward i i don't think that colin coward realized that dwayne haskins was dead crazy insane like to just

Speaker 1 yeah imagine if you're dwayne Haskins family and you see that, you're like watching the herd, like, yeah, you can't want to see. Oh, cool.
Thanks, Colin. Awesome job.

Speaker 7 Schefters watching this. Like, why, why couldn't you have said that the day it happened to take some of the steam off me?

Speaker 1 Seriously, seriously.

Speaker 1 Okay, we got a great rest of the show. We're going to kick it back to ourselves in studio.
We've got

Speaker 1 hot seat cool thrown, including Jake's rant,

Speaker 1 Matt Olson, Mount Rushmore of Rookie Mistakes, and chaps with Rose. So, unbelievable show.
Let's kick it back to ourselves.

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Speaker 1 Okay, hot seat cool thrown, but we're doing things a little out of order because last night at about, what was it, like 9 o'clock, we got a text on the PMT Group text.

Speaker 1 By the way, someone was pointing out, so I tweeted out Jake's text. Someone pointed out that it's called PMT full group why did that happen

Speaker 1 Billy suspension

Speaker 1 had the circ the avatar was uh Billy's face with a circle and a line through it over so we should just go back to that one yeah because I was I because people kept on saying like oh I wonder what's not the PMT full group you know

Speaker 1 it really there's only one side chat it's me PFT and Hank and that's us talking about memes

Speaker 1 so

Speaker 1 That there everyone all the other conversation goes in the PMT full group. I thought it was Billy.

Speaker 7 Jake was so fired up last night. Yeah, I don't think we've ever gotten a text from Jake being like, no, permission to go in.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so he said, can I rant on the Orioles broadcasting situation on the show tomorrow?

Speaker 7 Permission granted.

Speaker 1 Listen, am I allowed to talk on the podcast?

Speaker 11 It's your guy's show, but I requested a segment.

Speaker 1 Jake, you're part of it.

Speaker 1 I understand. New guys are segregated.
New segment alert.

Speaker 7 What should we call it? When Jake's really fired, like once a year, when Jake's fired up, when broadcasters get suspended for no reason.

Speaker 1 Okay. The Eyes of Marsh.

Speaker 4 Tom Brennan. How about that?

Speaker 1 We should actually give away. away, we should give equity of pardon my take to everyone here.

Speaker 1 And then that way, if like we ever have a controversy, we like draw straws, see who has to take the bullets. Yeah.

Speaker 1 So Jake, you have 98% of the equity on pardon my take.

Speaker 7 Respect to biz, Jake.

Speaker 1 Okay, so, Jake, are you ready?

Speaker 11 I'm ready. Okay, let's give the context first.

Speaker 1 Yes, give all the context. Okay, so.

Speaker 7 Please don't be biased, though.

Speaker 1 Please don't be biased.

Speaker 11 There was no bias in this context.

Speaker 4 Tell it the context.

Speaker 7 It sounds like you're already a little bit biased.

Speaker 1 No. I did an old debate trick.
I told you last night that I'm going to take the side of John Angelos. I'm not, but I wanted you to prepare for that.

Speaker 1 I know you're not, because then you would get roasted by the end of the day. Although,

Speaker 1 he kind of rules. But we'll talk about that later.
Yeah. In a terrible, terrible way.
Okay.

Speaker 11 So, Kevin Brown, play-by-play broadcaster, Baltimore Orioles on Masson.

Speaker 1 The guy who punched the concrete? No. Oh.
Different. Okay.

Speaker 3 Yeah, you got confused by the formula.

Speaker 1 I did. Kevin Brown, whose son's name is Rich.
Yes.

Speaker 11 So a week or two ago, he was doing his broadcast open. Anytime you watch a game, you're on the air, you're on camera for a few minutes, pre-produced segments, graphics, VOs, things like that.

Speaker 11 A pre-produced

Speaker 11 element of this opening between the Orioles and the Rays showed how the Orioles, who have been historically bad the last few years, they have not won 16 series in a row at Tropicana Field.

Speaker 11 But this year, the Orioles, of course, the darlings of the MLB. Big Cat's got a huge future on that.

Speaker 7 The Orioles are the darlings of the MLB.

Speaker 3 This season, yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay, all right. I would actually argue that, yeah, they're liable to be a lot of people.
It's showhead and the Orioles.

Speaker 11 Young stars, like, they've been the last of the ALS.

Speaker 1 They've got expectations. Exactly.
Their first place in the AL right now.

Speaker 7 Or say Trey Turner is the darling of MLB.

Speaker 1 That's true. He just came back from the second.
So

Speaker 11 it's been since 2017, six years since they won a series at Tropicana Field. But this season, Kevin Brown mentioned, they've won three times in five opportunities.

Speaker 3 They're better this year.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 11 They're much better this year compared to years past.

Speaker 1 But he pointed out that they had lost.

Speaker 11 But he pointed out that they had not won 16 straight series. And the guy in charge of the Orioles, John Angelos, says,

Speaker 11 that's too sensitive.

Speaker 1 You're out.

Speaker 11 You're suspended.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 11 Indefinitely. Okay.

Speaker 7 The CEO of the Orioles. Yes.
Yes.

Speaker 1 Now, would you clarify this as an insult fact?

Speaker 10 No.

Speaker 1 Okay. I'm playing.
I keep stating facts.

Speaker 7 I'm going to play Devil's Advocate. Okay.

Speaker 1 And I have more to say. Okay.
That's the basis for those.

Speaker 1 Go off. Go off.
PFT and I will play Devil's Advocate after. Go off.
Okay. So

Speaker 11 you're suspending the broadcaster for stating those facts.

Speaker 3 Where did he get those facts?

Speaker 11 From the truck.

Speaker 7 So it's throwing the truck under the water.

Speaker 11 Where did the truck get those facts? From the team's PR game notes.

Speaker 1 In that case, suspend all of that. Oh!

Speaker 1 You're watching on YouTube. He just tossed them.

Speaker 11 If you're going to just suspend him, you got to suspend everyone else involved with making that decision of making these facts come to light so jake how do you know that they got it in that order that the that the guys in the truck got it from the team i mean they're not making up stats like when you're a producer of a broadcast like you don't you google these you get these from like legitimate sources yeah okay so in reality you get these you get these facts jake it's jake shapiro the facts don't care about the truck doesn't make up these numbers they get it from a source right someone who's in charge of compiling the numbers they were so probably just got it from looking at the actual stats and saying hey here but they were so bad it felt made made up right like how could they be that bad yeah so i don't understand why he has to take the heat for this because it's just insane and every other broadcaster was clowning on the orioles like they had such a good thing going they had the entire baseball world on their side and now people

Speaker 7 not me i want big cat to win 35 to one thank you people are going to root against the orioles just to see their owner i don't think so because jake if this is your first exposure to how bad of a guy john angelos is and peter angelos like what what bad owners they are, then you need to pay more attention to them in the past because nothing's going to change because I'll admit, that's me.

Speaker 1 I'm not familiar with them.

Speaker 7 We're still rooting for the team. The team is fun.
People will, though. The players are fun.
The owner, this is a guy that you'll remember last, I think it was on Martin Luther King Jr. Day.

Speaker 7 He gave his first public address to reporters in years, I think. And they asked him because he had contacted Goldman Sachs to inquire about selling the team and what that would look like.

Speaker 4 They asked him about that.

Speaker 1 Also, because he was getting sued by his brother.

Speaker 7 He was getting sued by his brother, but they wanted to know: like, what's the future of the Orioles? Are they going to move the team? Are you going to sell it?

Speaker 7 Are you coming back to Camden Yards because your lease is expiring?

Speaker 7 And then he said, listen, I think it's disgusting that you would ask me these questions on MLK Day when I'm here to talk about the great work that Martin Luther King Jr. has done in the community.

Speaker 7 And obviously, Martin Luther King Jr. would not care about a billionaire moving jobs away from a predominantly black inner city community.

Speaker 4 That's nothing that he would care about.

Speaker 7 But Peter Angelos and John Angelos are just world-class, they're world-class scumbags. They're villains.
They're villains.

Speaker 14 Both are the DMV owners.

Speaker 1 Pro sports. Well, former.
Former. I'm current.

Speaker 7 Listen, Jake, I'm not going to play Devil's Advocate. I'm just

Speaker 1 going to introduce you to reality. No, the Colts or the Ravens.
No, the Colts moved. Yeah, they did.

Speaker 1 They did.

Speaker 7 That was not Jim Merce that did that. He was powerlifting, smoking sigs.
But

Speaker 7 I'm going to use reality as a counter argument to you, Jake.

Speaker 7 In reality, this is the way that it's set up now, where teams own their own broadcast companies. I think in the case of the Orioles, it's 70%

Speaker 7 that's owned.

Speaker 11 Madison has the Orioles and the Nats.

Speaker 7 Yeah, and that's a whole other thing where the Orioles owe the Nationals like hundreds of millions of dollars and they just won't pay.

Speaker 7 But in reality, teams now own their own in-house broadcasting services. And if you're going to work for those broadcasting services, like journalism is long gone out the window at that point.

Speaker 7 So all these owners are like little warlords in their own towns, and they control the message. They control the propaganda.
And so this is just kind of what's going to happen.

Speaker 1 But that's the point. It's not good.

Speaker 7 I'm not saying it's good.

Speaker 11 Spinning it in a positive way. I've seen local broadcasters get fired for being too negative about their team.
This is the exact opposite.

Speaker 1 You just said facts. So I, it's terrible.
He should, Kevin Brown should be.

Speaker 3 He's a Syracuse guy also.

Speaker 1 Oh, here we go.

Speaker 1 I'm biased taking. Wait, you're supposed to say you're biased to start.
I mean, you're supposed to say you're biased to start.

Speaker 1 That took a long time to get to that.

Speaker 11 If he went to Northwestern, I'd have the same exact response.

Speaker 1 Well, who's to say? If we're a fifth, we'd all be drunk. Yeah.

Speaker 1 All right. So, yeah, it's crazy.
Kevin Brown seems like a really good broadcaster. This is also the same team that got rid of, wasn't it? John Miller, right?

Speaker 11 Who's like the voice of something?

Speaker 1 Who's

Speaker 1 incredible baseball voice? So it's bad.

Speaker 1 He should be reinstated.

Speaker 3 They said he's going to be back.

Speaker 1 It's an insane move, but I still keep going back to the point that if I owned a team, I probably would do the same thing.

Speaker 1 I'd just be like, because there's also, they also found out John Angelos enacted a new policy mandating that their broadcasters wear only team gear when on air.

Speaker 1 He's basically running this like North Korea. It's crazy.

Speaker 11 I have a question.

Speaker 1 But

Speaker 1 I kind of like the idea of being like, insult facts are not allowed.

Speaker 11 Can I wear part of my take gear outside of the show?

Speaker 7 I'm going to say no because you're trying to back us into a corner here. Yeah.

Speaker 11 That's pretty much what he's saying. Like, that's crazy.
God forbid he represents his team on the streets.

Speaker 1 No, no, that's not. No, no, no, no, no.

Speaker 7 You have to only wear team-issued gear while you're on the airport.

Speaker 1 He's saying you can't wear it. No, no, he's saying, no, no, you can't wear anything else while you're on the airport.
Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah.
Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 1 That's okay. Syracuse, not that great.

Speaker 7 Jake,

Speaker 7 you bring up some interesting points, which is this is bad, and it doesn't seem right and seems scuzzy. And from a moral point of view, you're right.
But as Big Cat says, if you own a team.

Speaker 3 Yeah, he can can do what he wants.

Speaker 7 He can do what he wants and he can be a scumbag.

Speaker 1 He'll never be able to get it. He can do what he wants.
But now he has

Speaker 1 no one's going to.

Speaker 7 Spin zone for Kevin Brown. He's coming out of this looking great.

Speaker 7 He's got everybody across the world being like, free Kevin Brown.

Speaker 1 It's ridiculous.

Speaker 7 Now, you know what else happened is because of that mandate that you said, Big Cat, where you have to wear team issue gear, they kicked one of their radio broadcasters off there, Kevin Brown, that had to be filled in on the radio.

Speaker 1 For that guy. Yeah.

Speaker 1 They're also not allowed. They've been reprimanded previously for mentioning past Oreo players who are no longer with the team.

Speaker 1 He basically is like, I want positive vibes only. Don't give me any insults backs.

Speaker 11 These are positive vibes. Your team has stunked the last few years and now they're really good.

Speaker 1 I watched the clip. I was shocked they hadn't won a series since 2017 in the Triumph.
I didn't know that. That's a show.
So now I know that.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but I know that now, and that's, I mean, that's terrible. Jake,

Speaker 7 how would you feel if you do a PLL game, right?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 7 Nail the final call. It's a buzzer-beater goal.

Speaker 1 Water dogs win.

Speaker 7 Unlikely.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's all right. So let's

Speaker 1 go back to reality, but

Speaker 1 I'm calling the water dogs.

Speaker 7 They tie, and then it goes to overtime, then they lose in overtime. But you nail the call at the end of the game, right? And then the first thing we say is, hey, Jake, was that a shot of a lifetime?

Speaker 7 You'd probably be pissed off at us, right? We're bringing up insult facts from the past.

Speaker 1 Insult facts are hurt feelings.

Speaker 7 That's what Kevin Brown did. He brought up insult facts.

Speaker 11 Well, he brought up something that was offered by the truck,

Speaker 11 which was put together by the PR team.

Speaker 7 Sounds like you're throwing the truck under the truck.

Speaker 11 No, I'm just saying, like, if he's going to be held responsible, then the owner should suspend every single person.

Speaker 1 They should all want John Angelos should call the games himself. Yeah, which actually would kind of rule.
That would be awesome.

Speaker 7 He's that episode of The Simpsons where Mr. Burns runs the entire power plant after they go on strike.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I mean, again, this is everyone should stand with Kevin Brown. I don't think, I think it's one of, it's very hard to find a thing online where everyone is in agreement.

Speaker 1 Everyone is in agreement that Kevin Brown got screwed. John Angelos is a bad guy.

Speaker 1 But I just, the idea of insult facts, it makes me laugh. Like if I walked around and I was like, anyone who calls me fat is fired, that would kind of rule.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Like, like, everyone has to call me skinny. But I don't know.

Speaker 7 You're learning Simmons, buddy.

Speaker 1 Yeah. So I,

Speaker 1 it, Kevin Brown deserves to be reinstated. Hopefully.

Speaker 1 This propels him to get an even better job because that would be the best ending is that another broadcast, another team is like, wait, this guy's awesome.

Speaker 1 We have an old broadcaster who's going to retire or something. Let's hire him, pay a shitload of money, get him out of the way.

Speaker 11 He's really good, too. He does ESPN, college football, and basketball.

Speaker 1 I don't think people will stop rooting against the Orioles because I do think people can, at this point in time, most owners are complete assholes, and you still root for your team.

Speaker 7 Governors, yeah.

Speaker 1 Governors, yeah. I mean, Stan Cronkey, like, he's just, he's won every title.

Speaker 1 Nuggets fans aren't like, damn, I wish we didn't win that because of Stan Cronky. They're just like, yeah, look at Stan Cronkey whispering in people's ears on the stage.
He's a weirdo.

Speaker 1 Let's just pretend that that doesn't exist. We won the title.
Yeah.

Speaker 7 Behind every great fortune is a great crime. I think Jiao Rule said that.

Speaker 4 The Red Sox got rid of Don Arsillo for no reason, and still people are still mad. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's crazy, too.

Speaker 11 And he's doing well at the Padres. He's the best.

Speaker 7 I usually don't laugh at Wikipedia edits. I think they're like the lowest form of comedy besides, I don't know.
like misspelling words intentionally badly on Twitter.

Speaker 7 But there was a very funny one earlier today. If you go to John Angelos' Wikipedia page, it says he's listed as giant baby John Angelos.
He is as his official name.

Speaker 1 He is giant angels.

Speaker 7 Which I think we should just always refer to John Angelos as giant baby John Angelos.

Speaker 1 And he's such a giant baby that he will never face the music. No.

Speaker 1 Like you said, the last time he, the first time he had been in public in a long time was Martin Luther King Day giving away a scholarship.

Speaker 1 You even missed a part that was so funny that he called out the reporter who asked him the question and he's like, are you even from from here?

Speaker 1 It was a beat reporter for the Orioles who've been covering them for like years and years. Yeah, so he doesn't even know what he's doing.
He doesn't even know his beat reporters. Yep.

Speaker 1 So, Jake Goodrant, I love the, I need a clip of him kicking them all out. I mean, do you guys agree with that? Like, yeah, no,

Speaker 11 why does he have to take the blood? Why is he the only person getting in trouble for this?

Speaker 1 Like, yeah, no, take up the numbers.

Speaker 7 Yeah, sounds like you're trying to get everybody else in trouble.

Speaker 4 Yeah, but yeah, it sounds like if they got in trouble, you'd be like, all right, that's fine. That's fine.

Speaker 7 It sounds like you're tattling on the class.

Speaker 11 No, I'm not tattling on the class.

Speaker 1 In that case, either suspend everyone or suspend everyone should walk out i did like when i when i when i was like i almost respect john angelos level of like controlling the media one guy replied to me and was like this isn't a joking matter a guy's a guy's job is at stake it's like well what what what other reason we have to be on twitter yeah and also that's like every time we talk about a player performing badly in a game, his job is at stake.

Speaker 1 Well, our jobs are at stake. We're tweeting for our job.
Every day. Yeah, we're podcasting for our job.
This is a business now.

Speaker 11 Where you get one chance. That's why I'm so buttoned up on here.
One bad word, you're done forever. So like this guy trying to just end his career like that.

Speaker 1 Oh man, it really makes me think how awesome it would be if in like 10 years from now Jake gets a play-by-play job somewhere and this happens to him and we take the owner's side.

Speaker 1 I will. That really will.
I absolutely will. Jake, hype out the body.

Speaker 7 John Angelos gives you a call today. Hey, the whole team walked out.
Because

Speaker 7 they're standing in unison with Kevin Brown. Jake, we need you to step up and be play-by-play for the Baltimore Orioles.

Speaker 4 What do you say? No.

Speaker 1 you turn it down. What? Wow.
So we only get one shot. You said it.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 You don't want to be a scab. I respect it.

Speaker 11 It's contradicting what I say.

Speaker 1 I don't believe any young broadcaster reaches out for advice.

Speaker 11 They're like, what's the one thing? I say, never say no to an opportunity. So that's right against that.

Speaker 11 But rules are meant to be broken.

Speaker 1 Oh, okay. Bad boy.
Bad boy, Jake. You're like Steve Jobs over there.
First rule, break all the rules. But

Speaker 11 morally, like, this is his job.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 7 So, Jake, are you going to call the person that takes his

Speaker 1 a scab? Well, he's going to be back.

Speaker 7 Yeah, he's going to be back. So, would you?

Speaker 1 If someone took his job, would you call him a scab?

Speaker 1 Either way, the Orioles are an awesome, awesome story.

Speaker 1 Camden has been packed. It looks sick.
They have like a very fun young team. Right.

Speaker 1 And I think actually even more so that people are going to root for this team because they know the history of the Angelos that their window is so small because as soon as they start having to pay people, they'll just start trading them.

Speaker 1 They'll trade them away. So it's like, this is the time.

Speaker 1 I want the Orioles to fight.

Speaker 11 If they get eliminated, people are going to be like, good thing that guy's not getting a ring.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but

Speaker 7 actually, that would be so funny if they win the World Series and then they hand the trophy right to John Angeles. He's like the big hero of it.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah. Okay, good hot seat.

Speaker 1 That delivered, Jake. What's your cool throne?

Speaker 11 My cool throne is Richard Sherman.

Speaker 1 Oh.

Speaker 11 Okay. He's joining Skip Bayless on Undisputed.

Speaker 1 And Lil Wayne. I think we've predicted that on part of my take, right?

Speaker 7 So they're going with the Stephen A. Smith model, which is just like, let's roll out a bunch of cannon fodder for Skip Bayless to just mow down day in, day out, rotating cast of guests.

Speaker 7 That's what it's going to be. Now, some people say that's because nobody actually wants to work with Skip Bayless, so they have to find like five different people trying to get into the biz.

Speaker 7 I would say that's not the case. I would say that Lil Wayne and Skip Bayless are great friends, and so that's going to be a great show.
Richard Sherman and Skip Bayless have some history, too.

Speaker 7 Do you remember that?

Speaker 1 Yeah, I do not. Skip Bayless

Speaker 1 Sherman has history with everyone.

Speaker 7 He does. He's got beef.

Speaker 7 Skip Bayless called Sherman out on first take, like 10 years ago.

Speaker 7 And then Richard Sherman was like, Skip Bayless, like, you've never played football in your life. I'm more accomplished than you are.
I've done more in my short career than you have.

Speaker 7 They've got, there's some true animosity there, which I love.

Speaker 1 Perfect for it. He's perfect for it.
All right, good hot seat, cool throne. Hank, back to the regular order.

Speaker 4 My hot seat is Shohei Otani.

Speaker 1 Uh-oh.

Speaker 7 Oh, he sucks, right?

Speaker 4 Drake a week ago was spotted out seeing a Shohei Otani jersey.

Speaker 1 Oh, no.

Speaker 4 And since then, he's gone 2 for 12. Oh, no.
So the Drake curse is back. Could have been the cool throne

Speaker 4 putting Shohei in the hot seat.

Speaker 7 Shovared.

Speaker 4 You guys tried to jinx him last week. He then was player of the game twice in one day.

Speaker 1 Well,

Speaker 1 we tried to get a job. You guys don't have the juice that Drake has.
We tried to find a way to be Shohei haters, and we couldn't even come up with it.

Speaker 1 It's similar to when we tried to be Steph Curry haters, and all we could come up with was his mouth guard.

Speaker 7 And his posture.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and his posture. No, Kevin Durant's the posture.
That's true, yeah. Yeah, yeah.
But yeah, there's some guys that are just universally loved, and Shohei stays that.

Speaker 1 Hopefully, Drake doesn't fuck it up too bad.

Speaker 7 I would say Shohei's afraid of playing in a major market.

Speaker 1 That's what I would say.

Speaker 7 No, he's in Anaheim. Yeah.

Speaker 7 He's in Orange County. Learn maps, bro.

Speaker 4 What's their team name?

Speaker 1 Well, they're just trying to get market share.

Speaker 1 We all know where they play.

Speaker 7 He lives in suburbs.

Speaker 4 You can live in the suburbs and play in L.A.

Speaker 1 He plays in the suburbs.

Speaker 7 Let's look up where's the Angels Stadium?

Speaker 1 Look up the team stadium. They're not in L.A.

Speaker 1 What's Anaheim Angels? Oh, Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim or something.

Speaker 14 Which is the Giants and Jets is not New York city markets?

Speaker 4 Great question, Max. I would.

Speaker 7 I would, too. Let's see where this is.
Well, that's their

Speaker 1 fuck. You got me.

Speaker 1 You got me, got me, you got me, got me. All right.
I stand down. I'm standing down.

Speaker 4 Then my cool throne is bowling.

Speaker 1 Yeah. We're bowling today.

Speaker 4 Live stream. Yep.
Plug God. I am the plug god.
That's what they call me.

Speaker 7 They're so far outside of Los Angeles. But I plug.

Speaker 4 See, I'm more of like a plug when I don't have anything else for a cool throne.

Speaker 4 That's like a break in case of emergency. Yeah, yeah.
Jake's just addicted to plugging. Okay, God.

Speaker 1 Our sponsors. In Hank's defense, he had no idea we were going to tape a show for Wednesday.

Speaker 4 Well, you said we were going to do it tonight, and then like two seconds ago, you're like, let's just do Hot Sea Cool Throne.

Speaker 1 Well, no, we, no, no.

Speaker 1 That's what we were going to do this whole time. Yeah, that was the plan the whole time.

Speaker 4 You improvised one second ago.

Speaker 1 No, no. We always said we were going to tape the beginning of the show after hard knocks.

Speaker 4 All right, sorry. My cool throne is shorts.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Good one.
Go off. Wait, no, tell us about bowling.

Speaker 4 Bowling. We're going to be live streaming bowling tournament today in Chicago.
16-person tournament. Jake's on the call.

Speaker 4 I'm competing.

Speaker 1 What? Stop hitting the table.

Speaker 1 Jake is on the call.

Speaker 4 I'm competing. Big Cat's competing.
A bunch of people in Barcelona are competing. It's going to be a great day.
Starts at...

Speaker 1 I believe 3 Eastern.

Speaker 4 3 Eastern, 2 Central. 16-person bracket.
16-person bracket. Single elimination.
It's a lot of pressure.

Speaker 1 I think Big Cat's sneaky a favorite. I think you're a top three.

Speaker 4 I think you're a top three favorite.

Speaker 1 I'm a consistently. You're a good bowler.
I'm a consistently okay bowler. If there's anyone who's in this tournament who can bowl in like the 170s, I'm fucked.

Speaker 11 Three Eastern time.

Speaker 1 I'm a never bowl below like 110, but never bowl above a 170 guy. Wait, Hank, where is it streaming?

Speaker 11 Is it on Barcelon YouTube?

Speaker 4 Barstall YouTube. It's with Bolero.

Speaker 1 Bolero. I love Bolero.
I love Bolero.

Speaker 7 Best food and beverage game in the industry.

Speaker 1 Yes. Okay, PFT, your hot seat cool thrown.

Speaker 7 My hot seat is the Bucs, the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. Yes, they just released their depth chart, and it is fucking hilarious.

Speaker 7 At the quarterback position, they have Baker Mayfield or Kyle Trask listed as QB1. Love it.

Speaker 7 The letters OR

Speaker 7 appear on a depth chart for maybe the first time ever. So it's like you have two quarterbacks, you don't have one.

Speaker 1 This is some college football shit.

Speaker 7 I would like to see them run some formations where it's both Baker and Kyle on the field at the same time. Has any team ever done a two-quarterback system?

Speaker 1 The Dolphins. Yeah, Wildcat.

Speaker 7 Wildcat, no, that's running backs. It's all running backs.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Bonnie Brown.

Speaker 4 But they're playing quarterback. Yeah.

Speaker 7 Kind of. They just always ran the ball.
Yeah. But yeah, the Bucks.

Speaker 1 No, yeah, they always ran the ball.

Speaker 7 I feel like this is bad news for Baker. Because most people assume that Baker was going to be QB1, right? The or? Or Kyle Trey.
Yeah.

Speaker 7 This is telling me that Baker, they want Baker to be the QB1, but he's stunk in training camp, so they're like, well, we can't demote him yet, so we'll just make it an or.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we should release a depth chart before every PMT.

Speaker 1 Okay, Hank or golf?

Speaker 1 We don't know. Why not both? Okay.

Speaker 1 Your cool throne?

Speaker 7 My cool throne is sports documentaries. Yeah.
Because Johnny Menzel Untold is out. This is not a plug.
We got to watch it.

Speaker 7 I'm just saying straight up: the Untold documentary series on Netflix, awesome.

Speaker 1 All of them are. Shorter than the quarterback.

Speaker 7 Oh, yeah, I think it's just

Speaker 1 a movie. So we should, we'll review it, let's say, Monday.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Give everyone a few days. Monday, we'll review the Johnny Menzel Just one episode.

Speaker 7 Just a movie.

Speaker 7 I don't know if you've watched the movie, but they did one about the Trash Pandas, the minor league hockey team. That one kicks ass.
They did one about Mantiteo. Yeah.

Speaker 1 The Trash Pandas.

Speaker 7 Is that not the Trash Pandas? No, the Thrashers. The Thrashers.
That's right.

Speaker 7 That's a baseball.

Speaker 1 You're talking about raccoons. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 The Thrashers. You're talking about the animal.
The Minor League hockey one. The Danbury Trashers.
Dan Burry Thrashers, yeah.

Speaker 4 The and one one was really good.

Speaker 7 And one was great. Mantiteo was good.
And they got me to care about an Australian yachting team. I was like, fuck the New York Yacht Club.
I just looked up. I was like, Team Australia for Life.

Speaker 14 One hour and 12 minutes.

Speaker 1 Okay, so Monday, that's easy. Everyone can do that Monday.
We'll finish the show. Instead of a Monday reading, we'll do the Johnny Menzel document.

Speaker 4 Yep. I've tried to watch the QB show three times and fallen asleep by the end of every episode.

Speaker 7 You know what I don't like about the QB show is just how positive it is. I'm just like, I want to watch something and have a villain.
There's no villain in it.

Speaker 7 It's like Kirk Cousins, nicest human being on the planet.

Speaker 1 They also should release it like late February when you have that like first hit of withdrawal. Because right now I'm so much into like next season that I don't really care about last season.

Speaker 1 So, all right, my hot seat. I can't believe we didn't talk about it on Sunday night,

Speaker 1 but Carson Wentz. Carson Wentz released a picture.
I think it came out Monday. It might have.
He released a picture of him training. He's wearing wearing a what is it, a Colts helmet?

Speaker 1 No, an Eagles helmet, Colts, or Redskins, Commanders jersey, and Colts shorts. Yeah.
And he's basically,

Speaker 1 he's a human parlay.

Speaker 7 He's a Voltron of failure.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he's walking around being like, I'm ready to go. I'm going to be back in it.
I got in a debate about backup quarterbacks.

Speaker 1 I still think Carson Wentz, even though he is better than a lot of backup quarterbacks, probably doesn't fill the backup quarterback role very well.

Speaker 7 No, you want a backup quarterback to be able to just like seamlessly fill into any situation.

Speaker 1 You want a backup quarterback who will tread water.

Speaker 1 If you if basically your backup quarterback is there to make your starter better and not threaten your starter, like be like, ooh, looking over my shoulder.

Speaker 1 And also you want your backup quarterback to be able to fill in for like one game. If it's more than one or two games, your season's fucked regardless.
Yeah, like Colt McCoy.

Speaker 7 Right. Maybe the perfect Chase Daniel.

Speaker 1 People were saying, oh, Carson Wentz is better than Chase Daniel. And my point is Chase Daniel is way better than Carson Wentz at the role of backup.

Speaker 7 Yeah, I'd say that Kyle Trask is the best or quarterback in the NFL, but probably not a backup quarterback.

Speaker 7 Actually, it'd be interesting to look up: has there ever been a quarterback drafted in the top 10 that has gone on to become a great backup?

Speaker 7 Like great long-term backup quarterback. Blake Bortles.

Speaker 1 Blake Bortles. A lot.
Wait, say it again.

Speaker 7 A highly drafted, like top 10 quarterback, maybe top five, we'll say, that's lost a starting job and then gone on to have a long career as a great backup quarterback.

Speaker 1 Because it is a good skill set. Yeah, but you don't really see a lot of high-drafted guys end up being backups.
That's what I'm saying. Yeah, right.
No, I know exactly what you're saying.

Speaker 1 You're right. Wasn't Vic a backup for the Eagles at first? He was a good backup, but then he was a good one.

Speaker 14 Yeah, but then he ended up being a starter.

Speaker 1 I mean, you mean like...

Speaker 7 He was like starter and waiting. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 11 Carson Palmer?

Speaker 1 No. No, he wasn't.
Marcus Mario. Kyle Orton was good, good, but he wasn't highly drained.
He was like fourth rounder.

Speaker 3 And Marcus Mariota backed up,

Speaker 1 right? Yeah, that's a good call. Marcus Mariota might be the

Speaker 1 Falcons. No, he's

Speaker 1 from the Eagles now. Yeah, he's the Eagles backed up.

Speaker 7 No, but Jake said back up Carr last year. It was just

Speaker 1 correcting me. Yeah, that might be...

Speaker 1 That might be a good call.

Speaker 7 Insult fact. I'm sorry, Jake.

Speaker 1 My cool throne, I have two of them. The first is Phil Mickelson.
I don't know if you guys saw this clip. I'll play it real quick.

Speaker 1 But I love Phil Mickelson, even though everything that goes along with Phil Mickelson. But this this is him and Bryson DeShambeau playing a practice round and him going up to Bryson beforehand.

Speaker 1 What are we playing for? What are we playing for? I haven't thought about that.

Speaker 1 You haven't thought about it. Well,

Speaker 1 what were you thinking about? Okay, well, Camel and I will play you guys. You and Honor Bond.

Speaker 9 We'll play nine holes for a G.

Speaker 1 Perfect.

Speaker 1 Straight best ball. Perfect.
And

Speaker 1 when you're closed out, you can press for half. Not the full? Not the full.
Okay. So you gotta win the match to win.
Yeah, and if you want, what we'll do is we'll go 28.

Speaker 1 If you shoot 28 best ball, it's double. Perfect.
I love that. Okay.

Speaker 1 What's better? 28 or better. He's playing a lot more than you.

Speaker 7 Phil just absolutely steamrolled him in that negotiation. He's like, Phil's like, have you given any thought to it?

Speaker 4 Oh, I have.

Speaker 1 Here's exactly what we're going to do today. Well, you could probably rattle off like 10 different formats.

Speaker 1 But his shock at Bright would be like, what are you thinking about if you're not thinking about gambling right now? Like, what is going through your head? That's like breathing.

Speaker 1 And then, yeah, just rattles off. And then

Speaker 4 he also said he said he never plays for more than that, which is just a lie.

Speaker 1 That's That's a lie. And in true gamblers' fashion, Phil just kept on adding like double or nothing, this, and like you can, you can push for half.
If you shoot under 28, it's double G. Like, it's, I

Speaker 1 love Phil for that.

Speaker 7 Yeah, I love Phil. He's got, he's got a bankroll now.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 7 Phil's free. He can gamble as much as he wants.

Speaker 1 And then my other cool throne is names because a Twitter account named Bobby tweeted this the other day about his actual names of kids playing in the Little League World Series game on ESPN right now.

Speaker 1 The names are listed: Fuller Carver, Hudson Harper, Knox Nance, Cabot Clark, Colton Clayton, and Casey Rodin. It's a lot of alliteration.

Speaker 1 Names are getting wild.

Speaker 7 There's a lot of ENs in there.

Speaker 1 Knox Nance is a quarterback.

Speaker 1 He's a quarterback I will bet on

Speaker 1 midweek matching.

Speaker 7 Let's run through all the names again, and then we'll just assign them fictional job titles.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Fuller Carver.

Speaker 7 He is a cokehead lawyer that works for his dad's firm. Hudson Harper, he got arrested for murder in South Carolina.
Yep.

Speaker 1 Knox Nance, I think, is a QB. Yep.

Speaker 1 I think Cabot Clark,

Speaker 1 Cabot Clark, winemaker. Yep.

Speaker 4 Failed doctor. Yeah.

Speaker 7 Failed doctor pursued his passion making wine. Yep.

Speaker 1 Colton Clayton seems like just a sick, and someone replied, and it was spot on, a sick Iowa tight end. Yep.
Colton Clayton. Yep, that's fair.
And then Casey Rodin,

Speaker 1 Finance.

Speaker 7 Last off the bench for the Water Dogs.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah, definitely. Yeah.
A guy that we will eventually want to cut from our team. Kaysen Rodin.
But yeah,

Speaker 1 names are on the cool throne.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Should we get to our interview? We got a great interview with Matt Olson. People have been asking for some more baseball.
Well, guess what? We found a guy who dressed up as us for Halloween, AWL.

Speaker 1 He came in 7.30 on a Friday night. So shout out to Matt Olson.
He also is just, I think he's hit a home run every game since he's come on.

Speaker 11 He is future Hall of Family. He's on Team Evan and Shane and Dingers Only.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's great. He's a great, great dude.
So awesome interview with him.

Speaker 7 Do you think we're ever going to get somebody that dresses up as us for Halloween and the guy dresses up as me and the girl dresses up as you? No, probably not. Probably not.

Speaker 1 This was a guy-guy combo. Oh, it was? Yeah.
It was guy-guy combo. Oh, okay.
Yeah. Good, good.
So Matt Olson was me and then his friend was you. Love it.

Speaker 1 Okay, let's get to our interview.

Speaker 1 So, y'all know that we're we're big fans of Cracker Barrel, and this holiday season, I will be sat at their table with a big plate of country-fried turkey.

Speaker 15 And, Brandon, I'll be right there with you, and I'll check it off my Christmas list in the country store while I'm at it. It'll make a nice holiday tradition.

Speaker 1 Oh, that's so cute of you.

Speaker 15 Enjoy all the more holiday traditions only at Cracker Barrel.

Speaker 7 And now, here's Matt Olson.

Speaker 1 Okay, we now welcome on a very special guest in person. It is Atlanta Braves

Speaker 1 all-star, two-time all-star, Matt Olson.

Speaker 1 I'll say this too: future Hall of Famer, Matt Olson.

Speaker 9 Are we doing that right now?

Speaker 1 I was looking at the numbers,

Speaker 1 and you, if you stay healthy, you're a future Hall of Famer.

Speaker 9 Wow,

Speaker 9 that's throwing a lot on me right out the gate.

Speaker 1 The good news is that Big Hat's never jinxed anything in his family. No, no, no, you're good.

Speaker 1 I'm really aware of that.

Speaker 9 So I'll probably have a great career for me.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so, Matt, it was very funny.

Speaker 1 We were doing, I don't know if you listened to our baseball draft, but we did our Dingers-only League, and our producers Shane and Evan picked you, and someone was like, you know, Matt Olson's in AWL.

Speaker 1 I was like, what? How do you know that? And then we looked, and you had dressed up as us for Halloween a few years ago. Yep.

Speaker 9 I was you. It was like a last-minute.
We've got to throw something together for Halloween.

Speaker 9 Me and my buddies listened to PMT, and I was like, shit, I'll just get a mustache and

Speaker 9 some see-through glasses and throw it together. But uh my buddy did remind me that somebody stopped me that night and asked me if i was jeffrey dahmer

Speaker 9 so so i don't know if that says more about me or you yeah um

Speaker 9 i did also listen i did listen to that dinger's only draft yeah so i do have a slight bone to pick with hank okay all right let's get it out gal

Speaker 1 uh

Speaker 9 i do believe it was never heard of him when when the draft pick happened

Speaker 7 well i mean hank's a pretty big seam head he knows every player

Speaker 9 And then he found out that I listened to the podcast, and he quickly changed his opinion.

Speaker 1 It's funny how that works for us. Where we're like, oh, he likes us? Yeah, we love him.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 We've always been Matt Olsen guy. Yeah, that's not me.
That's just a big baseball player.

Speaker 4 Like,

Speaker 4 I'm not locked in. That's on me.

Speaker 9 Yeah, y'all haven't done a ton of baseball, guys, right? This is going to be

Speaker 1 Yellich. Yeah, Yellich is our guy.
You're now going to be a recurring guest. But yeah, we get a lot of tweets being like, we're the baseball podcast.
So here it is. Here we go.
Yeah.

Speaker 9 I remember the Yellich one from the

Speaker 1 bet that you guys had with maybe some

Speaker 9 ass eating going on.

Speaker 7 Yeah, well, here's the thing. If you ever get in the home run derby against Yellich, we are going to absolutely dose you with steroids.

Speaker 7 We're going to make sure that that happens. Yes.

Speaker 9 I'm going to throw it if it's me versus him in the final. You bet, you son of.

Speaker 1 Well, you are consistent.

Speaker 7 I think you might, though. That's the thing.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 You would. You're sicko.

Speaker 9 I mean, if it if it came down to it, maybe you threw me a little coin underneath the table.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 I would never make that bet with you, though, because you actually are consistently a great home run hitter, unlike Yelich, who just mysteriously had like one awesome year. Hmm, huh.

Speaker 7 Interesting.

Speaker 1 That is crazy.

Speaker 7 I just admit the numbers. We're just looking at numbers here.
There's a big spike in a low valley.

Speaker 1 Yes. Yes.
Yes.

Speaker 9 But you guys drove into that.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's true. We did.
We did. We doubted him to the point where he was like.

Speaker 9 I almost want you guys to make some dumb bet for me.

Speaker 7 He's almost more of a sicko than we are for even offering that. The fact that he wants it to happen.

Speaker 9 Was it his idea?

Speaker 1 No, no, no.

Speaker 7 It's a long story. There was a porn that came out featuring Christian Yelich.

Speaker 7 It was a guy that looked a lot like Christian Yelich. He says that it wasn't him.
And was he eating ass or getting his ass?

Speaker 1 He's actually standing up. Yeah, yeah.
I think he was eating ass. She was standing up.
And it looked,

Speaker 1 he'd get tagged in it constantly to the point where he had to be like, it's not me, guys. Like, please stop saying it's me.
So, yeah,

Speaker 1 that was a dumb move. But we are happy you're here.

Speaker 1 I guess, I mean, since we're talking about dingers only, I'll do just a dumb question. How awesome is it to hit a dinger in Major League Baseball? Because what are you 239, 239?

Speaker 9 Total? Yeah. I don't know.

Speaker 9 I know I hit my 200 this year at some point.

Speaker 1 May 217. But either way, you're hitting a lot.

Speaker 9 Yeah, it's a good feeling. I mean, you know, there's, that's, I would probably say that's the peak in the sport of being able to

Speaker 9 get one off a a guy, especially

Speaker 9 now that the A's have broken up a little bit. I've had a chance to face some old teammates, and

Speaker 9 I've gotten a couple of them. Chris Bassett was a fun one to get because we talk a lot of shit to each other.
So,

Speaker 9 you know,

Speaker 9 it's fun when you can leave the yard. It's even more fun when you got a little story behind it, talk some shit to somebody.

Speaker 7 Do you have a favorite tinger?

Speaker 9 Yeah, I think my favorite is probably last year we played a series against the Mets at the end of the year where

Speaker 9 we had to basically sweep them to win the division. And night one, we faced DeGrom.

Speaker 9 And first inning, I think it was, Riley hit a homer in front of me, and I went back-to-back with him. And I feel like it kind of set the tone for the series.
We ended up sweeping him.

Speaker 7 When you do that, do you imagine Frank the Tank watching and just having an actual aneurysm?

Speaker 7 Like, if you hit a home run against the Mets, are you thinking to yourself, how big is the hole that Frank the Tank just chewed through his shirt?

Speaker 9 I'll say that the videos were checked

Speaker 9 after some games last year.

Speaker 1 The more we learn, Frank the Tank is somehow like the most famous person at Barstool, and every NLE's team uses Frank the Tank as motivation. They're like, how pissed off can we get Frank?

Speaker 9 Yeah,

Speaker 9 especially with... like kind of the way it went for us at the end last year where they had the big lead and then we ended up winning the division.

Speaker 9 There were some dudes in the clubhouse who were pretty tuned in.

Speaker 1 Does that ever look incredible?

Speaker 7 Okay, this is really dumb to even ask this, but I am serious. Was there an element of Frank before the collapse happened when he spelled out how the Mets were going to collapse, right?

Speaker 7 And everybody else was like, you're full of shit, Frank. The Mets are so far ahead right now.

Speaker 7 But he, to the law, to the letter of the law, said exactly what the Mets were going to do before they did it and what the Braves were going to do before they did it.

Speaker 7 Was there any motivation where you guys saw saw that and you're like, you know what? I think we can do it. Frank says that we can do it.

Speaker 9 I don't know if he gave us extra motivation, but

Speaker 9 I remember seeing a clip of a different dude saying that like the division is over or something like that.

Speaker 1 It was in July when they had the big league.

Speaker 9 I mean, it's not like we needed any huge motivation or anything like that, but it's funny to kind of look back on it.

Speaker 1 I mean, the fact, I'm just giggling right now because the idea that you're in a pennant race and, you know,

Speaker 1 you're trying to catch the Mets, you're in New York, you have a huge game, you beat DeGrom, and then the first thing you do when you go to the locker room is pull up Frank the Tank's Twitter and just laugh.

Speaker 1 Yeah, because

Speaker 9 everybody watches the Barcelona and everything.

Speaker 9 And I mean,

Speaker 9 when he gets on his rants, it's pretty musty TV.

Speaker 1 It's incredible.

Speaker 7 You mentioned going back-to-back with Riley.

Speaker 7 Did you know, fun stat I just saw today, that you and Riley have combined for back-to-back home runs in a game in April, May, June, July, and August this season.

Speaker 7 The only teammates in Major League Baseball history to have back-to-back home runs in a game in five straight months in a single season.

Speaker 9 Is that right? Pretty crazy. Crazy.
I didn't know that.

Speaker 7 Back-to-back home runs. That's got to be a pretty cool feeling, too.
Like, is it cooler for the second guy or the first guy?

Speaker 1 I think

Speaker 9 it's probably cooler for the second guy. Yeah.

Speaker 9 But it's probably harder for the first. Like, you can't get the first without, or you can't get the second without getting the first guy.

Speaker 9 somewhere the first guy usually gets pitches a hit because the second guy is also a dinger threat too right i will say hitting after a homer is is a tough gig sometimes because you know fans are still sitting up they're playing the music still nobody's watching in the dugout pitcher's pissed you're getting like his 100 mile an hour fastball you're getting this dirty shit because he doesn't want to give up another so um it's that's a pretty cool stat yeah they what so the braves are incredible this year uh you guys it feels like every night you're just a pitcher's nightmare.

Speaker 1 Do you guys feel that in the lineup where you're like, everyone can hit? And

Speaker 1 does it motivate you to be even better because you know that everyone around you don't want to let them down?

Speaker 9 I don't think, no, I don't think it works that way. I think it's almost the opposite where you don't, like, it's okay to have a shitty night in our lineup.

Speaker 9 You know, there's a lot of lineups in the league that, you know, one or two guys are doing it. most every night.

Speaker 9 If they're scoring a lot, like, you know, the three or four hole hitter is doing the damage and and you know hitting two homers or whatever, but it's like I can go up and punch out four times and and Orlando Arcia and Mike Harris are eight and nine hitters can have six RBIs together.

Speaker 9 So I kind of feel like it takes some of the pressure off. I mean, honestly, we got Ronald Lacuna, the stuff that he's doing at the top of the lineup is stupid.

Speaker 9 I was talking to somebody about it the other day. It's like

Speaker 9 he's almost like when you go golf with a scratch golfer. Like Like you see the big home runs he hits,

Speaker 9 the

Speaker 9 numbers he's putting up. He's hitting, what, 340 now? He went three for five.
He's probably hitting like 340, 50 stolen bases.

Speaker 9 But it's like at the end of the game, you're like, what did Ronald do today? And you check and it's like, oh, shit, he went three for five and had two stolen bases and three RBIs.

Speaker 9 It's like when you go golf with a scratch golfer, you're like, he didn't do anything that cool.

Speaker 1 He just hit every fairway, hit every green.

Speaker 1 He never made a birdie. Yeah, but he makes it all look easy.

Speaker 1 I mean, it sounds like you guys are good teammates to each other because I guess the question is more: like, if I were in the Braves lineup and I was like hitting 50 dingers, I'd be giving everyone shit who didn't hit 50 dingers.

Speaker 1 But it sounds like you guys have each other's back.

Speaker 9 No, no, we're not doing that.

Speaker 9 Somebody might have said something to Mike Harris the other day about him being the only one in single-digit homers, but

Speaker 9 he hit two that night.

Speaker 1 Say that.

Speaker 1 There you go. That works too.

Speaker 7 Yeah, I love that. So

Speaker 7 if you do go over for one night and you go over for the next night how soon do you start to think to yourself i gotta i gotta change something up i got like you start to think maybe it's the batting stance maybe it's just like i don't know having a different pregame meal when do you when do you start to think like okay time for a change yeah i mean actual change like actually diving in and and doing baseball change probably not that quickly but i'm i'm eating something different or you know putting my socks on a different way yeah everybody says they're they're not superstitious i think that's everybody in baseball is you've got so much time where you're just like waiting around.

Speaker 9 Exactly.

Speaker 7 Your mind works too much.

Speaker 9 You have to get superstitious. Everybody takes their bat weight off on deck a certain way.
It's like you're going to tell me you're not superstitious doing stuff differently.

Speaker 9 But yeah, I'll mix that kind of stuff up.

Speaker 9 Actual dive into baseball, mix it up. We're going to give it a little more time than that.

Speaker 1 Do you know your longest slump?

Speaker 9 I do not. Okay.
Do you?

Speaker 1 No, I don't.

Speaker 1 But I was wondering because I've always just, I mean, I'm always amazed by baseball players because the mental toughness it takes to play the game and a 270 hitter is a good hitter right now in today's game where it's like

Speaker 1 if I if I didn't get a hit for a week, I would just be like, I'm going to retire. I'm never going to get a hit again.

Speaker 9 Yeah, I mean, a week, a week, I would probably be there

Speaker 9 a little bit if you're going over.

Speaker 9 My longest of stretch, I don't think is

Speaker 9 that crazy, but I'm going to look it up right now. Yeah, look it up.

Speaker 9 I hope it's like three weeks.

Speaker 9 I'm going to sound like an idiot when you're like, you were O for 75. Yeah.

Speaker 9 But

Speaker 9 no, you know, it's part of it.

Speaker 9 As stupid and cliche as it is, like, it's a long-ass season. And

Speaker 9 all the ups and downs will kind of level out at some point.

Speaker 3 Yeah, do you get bored?

Speaker 9 During a baseball season, for sure.

Speaker 7 Yeah, is that like August? Like, right now, are you bored?

Speaker 9 Well, luckily, we're winning and

Speaker 9 we got a pretty fun team, so

Speaker 9 that helps a little bit of it, but just the monotony of a baseball season is tough.

Speaker 7 Even with the bigger bases, that doesn't help out?

Speaker 9 Yeah, the bigger bases and the pitch clock makes it a lot better.

Speaker 9 Games are so much quicker.

Speaker 9 No, there's a point. Like I said, luckily we're winning.

Speaker 9 I'd feel bad if we were about to lose our 100th game and you get 150 games in. You're just let's get the shit over with.
But

Speaker 9 we got a good squad and we have a lot of fun with it.

Speaker 1 All right, so I'm looking it up. I couldn't find your longest slump, but it says that you can't hit a slider.
Is that true? Is that right? Yeah.

Speaker 9 Well, I did take a slider right down the middle today earlier, so it could be.

Speaker 1 Okay, yeah, so you made that. It was time of this taping.
The Braves did beat the Cubs 8-0 today.

Speaker 1 All right, so was that off Hendrix?

Speaker 9 That was.

Speaker 1 Oh, no, that was after.

Speaker 9 Yeah,

Speaker 9 or Wineski?

Speaker 1 Yeah, came in, yeah. So facing a guy like Hendrix, though, we were talking about it as we walked in.

Speaker 1 Is it weird to face a guy like that who his velocity is so different than everyone else you go up against? Is he like rare enough that that's why it works?

Speaker 9 Yeah, yeah. And I mean, you look at it, he's got like a career 3-5 ERA, so the dude's been doing it.

Speaker 9 But yeah, I mean, I feel like we just faced a week straight of guys throwing 95 to 100, and then you get up and Hendrix is floating 80 mile an hour change-ups, and there's just like shit you don't see anymore.

Speaker 9 Right. And it is, it's almost like it's, it's so crazy that it's effective.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I mean, you guys did hit him well today. Who's the, who's got the nastiest stuff

Speaker 1 for you? Uh,

Speaker 9 I'm O for off Garrett Cole. I haven't, I haven't faced him in a while.

Speaker 9 I was, when I was in Oakland, I was facing a good bit in the Houston days, and I don't, I don't know the exact numbers, but it's around 0 for 20 with about 15 punches. So

Speaker 9 I'm going to need to get back out there and try to fix that.

Speaker 7 We probably won't see me in the postseason this year. That's the good news.

Speaker 7 Is there a picture that you have their number?

Speaker 9 I got to be careful about this. I don't want to jinx it.

Speaker 9 I think I've had pretty good. There's actually a guy

Speaker 9 which is weird.

Speaker 9 Alex Claudio, who's a submarine.

Speaker 1 What team?

Speaker 1 Mariners.

Speaker 9 don't think so

Speaker 9 he he was he was with the Rangers for a while and and the Angels

Speaker 9 but he's he's a he's Brewers

Speaker 1 now okay there you go Hank

Speaker 9 he's a sidearm lefty and I think at one point I was like seven for seven off the guy and and just couldn't stop just crushing him, which is weird because they always they always bring him in.

Speaker 9 I'm like, are y'all fucking checking the numbers?

Speaker 9 I'm crushing this dude.

Speaker 1 Right.

Speaker 7 You don't see too many submarine pitchers anymore. I feel like we used to have them more back in the 90s.
Like every team had one submarine guy. Yeah.

Speaker 7 But is it that much different seeing where the ball comes out of his hand? Does it like fuck up your entire process of identifying what pitch is coming?

Speaker 9 Yeah, it does. And for whatever reason, now, most of the submarine guys that are left are

Speaker 9 throwing like 95-2 now. It's the Schriber dude with Boston and

Speaker 9 Tyler Rogers guy with San Francisco is just crazy weird slot. It's like, yeah, it's kind of like Hendrix.
It's just stuff you don't see all the time. So it's so backwards that it throws you off.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

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Speaker 1 I wanted to talk about your career for a second and the start of it. So you were going to play at Vanderbilt, and then you decided to go straight to the minors.
So

Speaker 1 what was that decision like? Because a lot of guys do end up playing in college baseball if they have that kind of offer, especially the school like Vanderbilt.

Speaker 1 But what made you decide like, hey, I'm just going to go straight to the minors here?

Speaker 9 I don't know.

Speaker 9 I'd be lying if I said that the signing bonus wasn't a part of the decision, but it wasn't.

Speaker 3 I could look it up right now.

Speaker 1 You could just say it or we could look it up.

Speaker 9 All right. It was just over a million.
Oh, nice.

Speaker 1 You got to go. Fuck Vanderbilt.
Yeah, you get a million dollars when you're 19 years old. Yeah, that sounds pretty good.

Speaker 9 But that's no money for life.

Speaker 9 It wasn't and never was the reason why I do it, but it was more so like

Speaker 9 you got an opportunity to go do it, especially as a hitter going to college is way different than going getting like 500 at bats. I actually went to Beloit, Wisconsin my first year, which sucks.

Speaker 1 Yeah,

Speaker 1 Beloit, Wisconsin. Beloit is the sound a fart makes in a toilet.

Speaker 9 Beloit? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Say it out loud. It is.

Speaker 9 It's pretty close to what the city looks like.

Speaker 1 Yeah, the Beloit Snappers you played for. You played for the Stockton.

Speaker 9 That's not far from

Speaker 1 Madison.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Stockton Ports, Midland Rockhounds, and the Nashville Set. Where's the Midland Rockhounds at?

Speaker 9 Midland, Texas. Okay.

Speaker 1 Where are the Stockton ports?

Speaker 9 Stockton, California. Okay.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so that's

Speaker 9 Northern California. Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. Was that fun?

Speaker 9 On the bus? Yeah, was it fun?

Speaker 7 Was there any element of Minor League Baseball that was fun for you?

Speaker 9 I think in the moment it was because we'd get on the bus and at times we'd do a big beer bus.

Speaker 9 Everybody would play cards and we thought it was cool to drive 12 hours through the night and then play the next day. But looking back, it's like that was fucking brutal.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Seriously, I don't know how minor leaguers do it. So you, so when was the moment, um,

Speaker 1 was there like a special moment when you got called up? Did they do like surprise video or anything?

Speaker 9 No, they just, it was actually, it was

Speaker 9 kind of lame. We just finished our AAA season and, you know, they do the September.
The September call up, yeah. And we lost in our playoffs.

Speaker 9 And the, the triple-A managers came up as like, don't pack your shit to go home. You're going to meet the team.
So, I mean, it was a cool moment.

Speaker 9 It wasn't like all these videos you're seeing

Speaker 9 where guys are set up in the manager's office and people are crying.

Speaker 1 Now, were you, did you get called up right when you thought you were about to get called up, or was there a stretch where you're like, why have I not been called up?

Speaker 9 No, no, I thought it was, it was about right.

Speaker 9 I actually got, I started back in AAA after I got called up

Speaker 9 for that September. And I think about halfway through that year, I was a little bit like, you know,

Speaker 9 I think I'm ready. Enough.

Speaker 9 It's time to go. But we had Yonder Alonzo there ahead of me who

Speaker 9 was going off. So I actually came up and I was playing right field,

Speaker 9 which I don't know if you've seen me play, but I'm slow as shit.

Speaker 9 I have no business being in the outfield. I'm sure all the pitchers were pissed.

Speaker 1 It is the position that they just throw guys where they're just like, all right.

Speaker 7 I played a lot of right field growing up.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.
Well,

Speaker 9 yeah, I think the nine-year-old in Right Field is always the worst guy. They're like, hey, just go stand out there and don't fuck it up.
Yeah,

Speaker 7 pretty much.

Speaker 9 But yeah, you know,

Speaker 9 it was a cool story. And,

Speaker 9 you know, you always remember your first call.

Speaker 7 Yeah, and you get to the A's. And, I mean, we have taken the side of A's fans on this podcast.

Speaker 1 We're a fuck John Fisher podcast. I know you probably can't talk about it, but fuck John Fisher.

Speaker 7 But fuck him, right? Yeah.

Speaker 1 You can't talk about it, but fuck him.

Speaker 7 Fuck John Fisher. Yeah.
Right in his face.

Speaker 1 I love Ace fans. Yeah.
I love you.

Speaker 1 The fan bases,

Speaker 1 I love them.

Speaker 7 I want to fuck them in their face. I love them so much, but their owner is a piece of shit.
But playing for that team,

Speaker 7 was there ever a time when the fan support was like, you felt like maybe this might work out. Maybe the athletics are going to stay in Oakland.

Speaker 9 Yeah, I thought... I think a lot of us thought that we were going to be kind of like the dudes to flip the script a little bit because everybody had gotten traded before us and um

Speaker 9 you know i think it was like the donaldson sespidus wave right before us all those guys got traded they hit the reset button uh we came up and it was like me chapman uh simeon who's from the bay area

Speaker 9 yeah um you know starters like Chris Bassett, Shawn Minaya, you know, a bunch of dudes. We won 97 games back-to-back years, you know, with the Astros in our division.

Speaker 9 And I think it became like, all right, we're going to do this, we're going to be the ones to stay. And

Speaker 9 obviously, sitting here now, they just look at it as a little as a money maker.

Speaker 7 Yeah, I think the decision was probably already made. It was just a matter of time at that point.

Speaker 7 Did Billy Bean ever call you into his office and say,

Speaker 7 hey, I really like how tall your knees are, and give a small strike zone.

Speaker 7 That's why I called you. Did he have a weird thing for you that he liked?

Speaker 9 Billy is a weird guy, but he was always good.

Speaker 9 He did always crush candy, like the movie.

Speaker 9 But no,

Speaker 9 he didn't give me anything too weird. He did one time, I was getting a little froggy with trying to steal bases,

Speaker 9 and I got thrown out at third one time trying to time up a dude. And I saw him in the lunch line the next day, and he just looked at me.
He was like, hey, I looked over him.

Speaker 9 He's like, what the fuck was that?

Speaker 9 And I was like, what are you talking about? I had him timed up. And he's like, don't do that shit again.

Speaker 1 Did Did you feel a little special being like, I'm a Billy Bean draft pick? Like,

Speaker 1 knowing his history of draft picks and just how he built that team?

Speaker 9 Yeah, I mean, you buy into it a little bit. You know, you kind of feel like the misfits.
I mean, you go and play at the Coliseum. You feel like...

Speaker 9 you know, one thing's not like the other here when you go play at other stadiums. Yeah.

Speaker 9 It almost becomes something that you rally behind a little bit. But,

Speaker 9 no, Billy was good. GM was always good to us.
David Forrest,

Speaker 9 you know, coach of staff was always good, and we had a good team.

Speaker 1 And when the fans are good there, they're the best. Like those teams, when they get good, the guys playing the saxophone in the outfield and just like,

Speaker 1 it just so it breaks my heart whenever a team leaves a city.

Speaker 9 Yeah, it's like nowhere you've ever seen because nobody, all the fans, they just don't give a shit, really. I mean, they don't give a shit about what they're doing.
They give a shit about the game.

Speaker 1 They're just going crazy.

Speaker 9 It's like a college football game, but you're playing Major League Baseball in a way. So it is cool.
So it's kind of sad to see what's going on there.

Speaker 7 Yeah, you've got beautiful grass in the outfield there, too. They do.

Speaker 1 It's like the best-looking field. They do.

Speaker 9 The Kelly Greens.

Speaker 1 Man, the colors are great. Kind of like

Speaker 9 Kelly Greens that just came out.

Speaker 1 Great. Like the A font is great.
And the elephant. It's just great.
Yeah, it's sad. So when you got traded to the Braves, you're from the Atlanta area, so you probably were really pumped.

Speaker 1 Did you know they were going to give you that fat contract right away? Because it was like 24 hours, right?

Speaker 9 Yeah, it was quick.

Speaker 9 I didn't know. I mean, that's awesome.

Speaker 1 That's even better.

Speaker 9 Well, tying back to the A's,

Speaker 9 I mean, I was pretty open with my agent, and they were pretty open with him that I was open to signing something long-term. I was like, you know, I sure

Speaker 9 you want to get fair market, but I just wanted to have, you know, some,

Speaker 9 you know, a long-term deal deal and and you know go out and play and so my agent knew it was something that I was open to so when the trade happened

Speaker 9 Alex Alex got on it pretty quick he's

Speaker 9 he he when he gets worked up about something he like gets on it and goes

Speaker 9 as you see all the guys we have signed now so

Speaker 9 it wasn't

Speaker 9 it wasn't too hard to convince me to to come to the hometown and and sign for for eight years and

Speaker 9 they just won the World Series So, you know, it's a good team. Yeah.
A bunch of young dudes like Ozzie and Danzie was there at the time and Ronald. And so it was kind of a no-brainer for that.

Speaker 1 It's got to be the best 24 hours. Because you got traded.
And then 24 hours later, you signed an eight-year deal for 188 mil.

Speaker 9 Yeah,

Speaker 9 pretty nice.

Speaker 9 It was pretty sweet.

Speaker 9 It was a little weird walking in the clubhouse because I actually did the like press release before meeting the dudes, really.

Speaker 1 Oh, so so they saw you get paid and then you had to walk in the clubhouse.

Speaker 9 That is awkward, which is not like it mattered. Like, nobody said anything, but it was just like

Speaker 1 that is very awkward to be like, I haven't even played with you guys. Yeah.

Speaker 7 Was there any weirdness about, like, obviously, Ace, uh, Brave Sands love you.

Speaker 7 You're you're a fan favorite now, but like, at the time, they were kind of going through their own emotional drama with the Freddie Freeman stuff, right? And so that's what they were thinking about.

Speaker 7 They're like, oh, I love Freddy. And of course they should love Freddy.
Like, Freddy meant a a lot to the city.

Speaker 7 But when you come in, it's like you're the outside guy, even though you're a hometown guy, right?

Speaker 7 Was that weird at first, like, trying to figure out how you fit in there and figuring out how the fans were going to eventually like, are they ever going to come on and be on my side?

Speaker 7 Are they going to be just like asking about Freddy this whole time?

Speaker 9 Yeah, I think I think there was, you know, a tad of it.

Speaker 9 You know, obviously, when a guy is there that long and he's going to be a Hall of Famer, I mean, dude's career 300 hitter with all the accolades that he's gotten and he came up with the Braves.

Speaker 9 You know, there's going to be that stuff. Frankly, this whole process, you know, I knew I was going to get traded from Oakland, and I thought it was, I think it was

Speaker 9 LA didn't have first baseman, and Rizzo hadn't re-signed with the Yankees. And so, I mean, we were sitting there during the lockout, and I really didn't think Atlanta was really an option.

Speaker 9 I thought they were just going to re-sign Freddy and get along with it.

Speaker 9 Once that process kind of got started dragging out a little bit,

Speaker 9 I guess it became became a little more in our head that it could be possible. And then once it happened, it was the coolest thing ever.
But,

Speaker 9 you know,

Speaker 9 the way I look at it is the dude has done so much for Atlanta and, like I said, Hall of Famer.

Speaker 9 I would be upset as a Braves fan growing up and as a guy who plays for the team who I want want good fans, if they were just like kicked him out the door, you know,

Speaker 9 I'm happy that

Speaker 9 they love Freddie, and he's always been super nice to me. So

Speaker 9 it never affected what I was doing too much.

Speaker 7 That's a good way to look at it. To be like,

Speaker 7 the fan base cares so much about a guy that's given so much to the team that hopefully one day they'll think about me that way.

Speaker 9 Yeah, you know, I just think they respect what he did for the city as they should. I mean, I grew up watching Freddy when he first came up, so

Speaker 9 I respect what he did as a brave. So

Speaker 9 it's not like it's any

Speaker 9 sort of rift there. And he's, like I said, he's always been super good to me, and I hear great things about him from the guys.

Speaker 1 Another bad teammate question: Does anyone ever give you shit for not having a World Series ring?

Speaker 9 No, I, and it kind of

Speaker 1 pisses me off. Yeah, I would.

Speaker 9 It kind of pisses me off that nobody does. Like, they did the ring ceremony last year, and they were giving out fake rings to all the fans.
And I put mine on and was like,

Speaker 9 fuck yeah, this is sick, guys.

Speaker 1 I'm so glad we got it.

Speaker 9 And I was like trying to egg them on to chirp me about it, and nobody did. But

Speaker 9 maybe we just weren't there yet. Okay.

Speaker 9 They'll give it to me pretty good now. But yeah,

Speaker 9 nobody hit me too hard with it.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 7 Are you as amazed as we are when you watch the freeze run?

Speaker 1 Yes. That guy is so fast.
He's insane. He's so fast.
He makes people fall down.

Speaker 7 He's so fast.

Speaker 9 We should get one of the auto-racing.

Speaker 1 Oh, my God. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Hank. Hank, you should do it.

Speaker 1 Actually, Max. Yeah, we'll have Max do it because he'd probably like break his whole face.

Speaker 7 His body would explode. You just

Speaker 9 can't run full speed to start. Yeah.
Every time I've seen him lose, the person that goes is sandbagging a little bit to start. And then they turn their swords.

Speaker 1 Because he doesn't go as fast? Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 9 Because he waits a little bit, but the dudes who just blow their load right out the gate, they're the ones who who are busting their ass.

Speaker 7 That's the best is when somebody thinks that they've got him beat, and then the freeze just runs past them, and they get so surprised that they just trip and fall down. Yeah,

Speaker 9 Tyreek P Simah.

Speaker 7 That should be the penalty for our Dingers-only League. Like maybe next year.
Oh, yeah. Because if you lose, you have to race the Freeze.

Speaker 1 You have to race the Freeze. Oh, man, it would be so embarrassing.
I would just try to trip him. Yeah.
I'll just turn it up and try to trip him.

Speaker 9 While we're on the Braves Park, I don't think I've heard the full blooper story.

Speaker 1 Well, he's fat fuck, and he's a bully.

Speaker 9 He came at you?

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah, he's come at me many times.

Speaker 1 He lives rent-free in Frank's head, which is not fair.

Speaker 1 You've never talked to him. He can't talk, right?

Speaker 9 No, he can talk.

Speaker 1 As a mascot, he's allowed to talk about it. That's against the rules.

Speaker 9 Well, ooh, am I outing him right now?

Speaker 1 Yeah, you are. Does he talk as a mascot or does he talk out when he gets the mascot head off?

Speaker 9 No, I've never seen him. I've never seen him mascot.

Speaker 1 or with the head off no i've never seen him but he talks he's he's he's giving him now

Speaker 1 sorry

Speaker 1 that's the rule one of mascots but yeah no it's very funny what is blooper do you know no i'm not sure i because i've been looking at him is he like a dog is he an alien is he an alien dog he i'll say this bigfoot i don't know and and this is gonna bite me in the ass but He does do a hilarious job on social media.

Speaker 1 Like, he's very, very funny.

Speaker 1 Like, it was one of those things, like, whenever a new mascot comes along and they try to, you know, start beefs and do this stuff, and you're like, all right, this is enough.

Speaker 1 He finds new ways to be funny that I actually appreciate. Like, he's

Speaker 1 pretty good. Yeah, but he talks.
This is good. What does he sound like? I shouldn't have said that.

Speaker 9 I'm guessing he's about

Speaker 9 5'10 white guy with brown hair.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 7 So he listens to part of my take.

Speaker 1 Yeah, definitely. Exactly.
Exactly.

Speaker 9 That's right in y'all's wheelhouse.

Speaker 1 I invited him to Chicago this weekend, and he didn't show.

Speaker 9 He's dodging you?

Speaker 1 Yeah. Well, he said he has to be invited by the team.
Does he ever go on road games?

Speaker 9 Well, I mean, I wouldn't ever know, really.

Speaker 1 Yeah, true.

Speaker 9 He's never in full outfit on road games. Okay.

Speaker 1 Oh, so he's.

Speaker 9 But is he there? I don't know.

Speaker 1 Oh, interesting. So he might be here right now.

Speaker 1 He could be here right now.

Speaker 1 Are there more than one blooper?

Speaker 1 I don't think so. I think it's one of the same.
I think it's one guy. I think it's one guy.
He might travel with the team.

Speaker 9 I don't know what it looks like.

Speaker 7 What if it was just like there's a blooper on the road for road games and they just contract a new guy in each city?

Speaker 1 We'll never know.

Speaker 1 What if it gives us something to think about?

Speaker 1 Coonies just have to be a little bit different. Just Cooney's popping in between.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 1 You've ever seen him in the same place? No. So

Speaker 1 do you guys see, like, because he runs out. He tries to make it all about himself.
He's got a little like Dabo Sweeney in him where he comes out with the flag. Are you guys ever like, come on, dude?

Speaker 1 You didn't do anything. No, we like it.
Oh, good.

Speaker 9 He's pretty good. I think he does a good job.
As far as mascots go, he does a good job.

Speaker 9 I've always liked him and

Speaker 9 the Astros mascot does a good job.

Speaker 1 Yes, the Astros mascots are the underwear.

Speaker 7 Yeah. Yeah, that guy's funny.
I like the Philly Fanatic, too. Yeah, he's good.
San Diego chicken. Is that guy still around?

Speaker 9 Chicken.

Speaker 7 Yeah, there used to be a San Diego chicken.

Speaker 1 You know, Blooby does a good job. It hurts me to say it, but he does a good job.
But now that I know that he talks as the mascot, he now is, I think he's ineligible for mascot Hall of Fame.

Speaker 9 You think he's going to get fired?

Speaker 1 Yeah, I mean, you can't talk in the mascot costume. You can't do that.

Speaker 9 I'd feel like such a piece of shit if he got fired for that.

Speaker 1 If he gets fired for this exact moment, Barstow will hire him. Okay.
That's fair. That is fair.
Which we've hired people for way less. Oh, yeah.
Way, way less.

Speaker 9 Just making up for stuff that he's done.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I mean, we've hired people for nothing.

Speaker 1 Frank got hired. Well, Frank was, I mean, Frank is an all-star, but Frank got hired for just ranting on TV because the New Jersey transit made him delayed for opening day that's true

Speaker 1 he was on this on the news just screaming into the camera being like they make me miss opening day and Dave was like we got to hire this guy but the news just said like crazy Mets fans yeah they're like Mets fans are irate

Speaker 1 as long as the railroad

Speaker 7 Frank was there with his jeans

Speaker 1 he was yelling like incompetent incompetent and Dave was like you're hired you're hired well we found out the best part about Frank is when when we looked into who he was, he had been running a website for 15 years, updating it daily called Sports Ecyclopedia.

Speaker 1 He basically created Wikipedia before Wikipedia.

Speaker 1 And like no one was noticing, but he was just addicted to the grind. So he had just been updating the sports.

Speaker 9 Like all kinds of sports. He's just keeping everything up to date.

Speaker 7 He does this day in sports almost every day. And he had been doing that when nobody was reading his website.
So it's like, yeah, we got to hire this guy. He's already doing the job for free.

Speaker 1 Yeah, right? we go.

Speaker 7 It's nearly impossible to get around. For some, the frustration was overwhelming.

Speaker 7 And then I got track H, and he said,

Speaker 1 I got hired.

Speaker 1 It's the best story ever. Frank is, I mean, Frank is, I love Frank probably more than most people in the world because he is the best.
He's truly authentic.

Speaker 1 And you're just giving him hell all the time.

Speaker 9 We're not going straight for him, but

Speaker 9 like I said, some guys will check in after a good win.

Speaker 7 What about Mrs. Mett? Do you ever catch Mrs.
Mett the side of your eye?

Speaker 9 I can't say I've taken any double looks at Mrs. Mett, but

Speaker 9 they're usually busy with the trumpets and calling in Epidiaz or whatever.

Speaker 9 Are you a Mrs. Met fan?

Speaker 1 I mean, I know the bonk list.

Speaker 1 Are you a Mets guy?

Speaker 7 No, no, I'm a Nationals guy. Put on the Bonk list.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 7 But I can appreciate a good mascot when I see one.

Speaker 7 And Mrs. Mett, she's she's

Speaker 1 in the category. She's got a lot of power.

Speaker 7 You can tell she's got warning track power, is what I'll give her.

Speaker 1 All right, I had a couple last questions. What's my warning statement?

Speaker 7 I just appreciate the work she does as well. You're knocking out of the park.

Speaker 1 Respectfully.

Speaker 1 A couple last questions.

Speaker 1 Since you are an AWL and you listen to pardon my take, how dumb do we sound when we talk baseball?

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 9 No, you are pretty good.

Speaker 1 That was really nice of you because I know that's not. Well, because we don't talk baseball.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Well,

Speaker 9 you just need to expand

Speaker 9 your web a little bit. Get some more guys on.

Speaker 1 This is why we're like, hey, it's a Friday night. Let's do it.

Speaker 9 Yeah. Am I like a pioneer for actually? Yeah,

Speaker 7 I don't think you've ever recorded this late on a Friday before. Yeah.

Speaker 1 So, and you are a recurring guest now. Shout out to me.
Yeah, shout out to you.

Speaker 7 Can you teach us something? Make us smarter about baseball.

Speaker 9 Oh, yeah. Um,

Speaker 1 shit.

Speaker 7 Uh, maybe approach at the plate, let's say, or just like one thing that you guys should have.

Speaker 9 Should I give y'all like a like a trivia question?

Speaker 7 You can do trailblaze or just like if there's one nugget about baseball that we can just regurgitate, yeah, and then we can act like we invented it ourselves.

Speaker 7 That's really what we're looking for here.

Speaker 1 Something that fans watching the game get wrong routinely that they don't fully understand.

Speaker 9 Um, shit,

Speaker 9 you're putting me on the spot.

Speaker 7 Home runs are rally killers.

Speaker 1 Yes. Home runs are rally killers.

Speaker 9 That is confirmed. This is rough because it could have hurt that.

Speaker 1 No. No, I agree.

Speaker 9 Walks or not as good as a hit.

Speaker 7 Teach us how has the shift impacted you as a first baseman?

Speaker 9 Not too much. You just got a little more room to run.
I think I got something good. If anybody ever hits a foul homer during an at-bat,

Speaker 9 they're fucked the rest of that bat.

Speaker 1 They'll never hit a home run after that, right?

Speaker 1 Because

Speaker 9 there's three options from that point on. It's another homer, which is like a small percentage, or a punch out or a walk.
And the punch out is the highest percentage there.

Speaker 1 So when you hit a home run foul, it's in your head right away. You're like, damn it.

Speaker 9 You know, I don't think it's something you immediately get in your head, but like right after, you're like, yeah, I was fucked.

Speaker 9 That was my one chance. I'm fucked.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so do you know it when you go up to a plate appearance, you're like, I'm going to see maybe one pitch that's going to be my pitch?

Speaker 9 Yeah, I mean, it depends who it is.

Speaker 9 Kyle Hendricks today is not going to give you a whole lot to hit. So if he throws one over the middle and you miss it, you could be in a bad spot.
But

Speaker 9 I think... I think sometimes we give pitchers a little too much credit.

Speaker 9 They're going to lose some stuff over the middle. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 7 I know Barry Bonds was like the one example to kind of go against what you were saying earlier.

Speaker 7 I could distinctly remember watching Barry Bond's plate appearances where he hit like five home runs foul, and then the sixth one he hits

Speaker 7 three times as far as the other one, straight out into the water.

Speaker 9 But yeah, but that was one of the three.

Speaker 1 That was, yeah, and it's Barry Bonds, too. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 7 Should he be in the Hall of Fame?

Speaker 1 Yes. Yeah.

Speaker 7 Correct answer.

Speaker 1 Maybe you'll be right next to him.

Speaker 9 I don't think that's any. I don't think that's any question.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 9 I mean, I think there was a lot of

Speaker 9 that stuff going on in that time period.

Speaker 7 You should start kissing journalists' asses now.

Speaker 1 Think so? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Because this is a good way. We're going to probably have Hall of Fame votes.

Speaker 9 You guys know a lot of journalists?

Speaker 7 Yeah, ourselves.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we are. We're as big J as a cash.

Speaker 7 We know Jake Marsh.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 We will push. We'll push for you.
Do you guys?

Speaker 1 Is it still like Little League where, like, if you strike out, but you get a good foul, like, you get a good foul cut, people are like, hey, good cut up there? No. Oh, okay.

Speaker 1 It always made me feel good when I was like, yeah, that was a good cut.

Speaker 9 You'd get a little slap on the ass. Just missed it.
Yeah, good cut.

Speaker 1 Good cut.

Speaker 9 No, I've actually, I've had it. I've been in dugouts where guys get pissed about that.

Speaker 1 I would imagine.

Speaker 9 I won't name a name because he was like a veteran who

Speaker 9 was when I was first coming up. He was with Oakland.
But

Speaker 9 if he would line out, I'm talking, like, hit a bullet at somebody or gets robbed a homer. And you walk in, you slap him on the ass or give him a high five.
He's like, don't fucking touch me.

Speaker 9 And he's like, I'm out. He's like, I don't care.
I'm out. Don't touch me.
I'm like.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we're not doing launch angle. We're not doing an exit velocity.
I'm out.

Speaker 1 What about good eye? Do you guys still say good eye to each other?

Speaker 9 Good eyes, good, good ball talk.

Speaker 1 I like that too, because that always made me feel like doing nothing, just being a coward and not swinging. We're like, good eye, good eye.

Speaker 7 Or what about this one when you take a strike?

Speaker 14 And they say, not your pitch.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 I like that one. Yeah, C1.

Speaker 9 You spin it like that's not the pitch you were looking for.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you got a C1. It comes through the plate.
Now you're ready.

Speaker 9 Or how about if

Speaker 9 you foul it off, if I foul it over the third base dugout, a little see it deep chatter. Yep.

Speaker 1 Oh, I like that.

Speaker 1 I like that. I like that a lot.
Yeah. Yeah.
Those are. All right.
So we got some baseball talk.

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Speaker 1 All right, so I'll say it. It's August 4th.
The Braves are going to be in the postseason. You guys are a wagon right now.

Speaker 1 When it does flip to postseason baseball, how much does it change in the locker room and like the approach day to day?

Speaker 1 Are you guys, is everyone, you know, no more bullshitting, no more talking shit, like having fun? Is it just like all business?

Speaker 9 No, no, I don't think, I don't think you could pay the guys in our clubhouse to be all business actually it's uh

Speaker 9 what you see with like arcia and ozzy and ronald like fucking around on the field is is about as genuine as it gets so if i went up to ozzy tomorrow and was like why don't you just chill out today he would like laugh in my face and and probably tell me to fuck off right

Speaker 9 it's which i think is good around that time because i have been on you know a couple teams where

Speaker 9 tightens up a little bit and everybody starts worrying when the playoffs coming around. And obviously, these dudes won the World Series in 21.
So they've been there, done that. But

Speaker 9 it's a good environment when

Speaker 9 you treat it like it's a normal game in May or whatever.

Speaker 1 And you also know that contractually you're now obligated if the Braves do win the World Series this year, we have to have you on via Zoom within 24 hours, preferably drunk.

Speaker 9 Oh, I will be drunk.

Speaker 1 Okay,

Speaker 1 within 24 hours of the best win in the world series, I will be drunk. You have to do that now.
Okay. Okay.
All right.

Speaker 1 Just so you know, we have a long-standing relationship with golfers, Joe Burrow, some of these guys who've won titles and come on right away.

Speaker 1 It's our favorite interviews because a lot of times those guys go on Sports Center right before they get drunk and they'll give like their 10 minutes and then they'll disappear for like a week.

Speaker 1 Yeah, no,

Speaker 9 I'll give you the good footage.

Speaker 1 Okay, all right, good, good. I love that.

Speaker 1 You're going to be a fan favorite already. Just for that.

Speaker 1 All right. Well, Matt Olson, thank you.
Recurring guest.

Speaker 7 Latest Friday guest ever.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and future Hall of Famer.

Speaker 1 And AWS.

Speaker 9 We're going to push for you. Well, I appreciate that.
We've got to work on that, though.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you just keep hitting dingers. But not too many because Shane and Evan are, I think, running away with dingers only.
Mostly.

Speaker 7 What do you think about that format for the Fantasy Baseball League?

Speaker 9 So it was dingers only?

Speaker 7 And then you also get one guy that gets hit by a pitch.

Speaker 1 Which was a mistake, probably. We probably won't do that next year.

Speaker 9 I think we should do it 10 points for this. Yeah,

Speaker 7 it counts as 10 points. We reduce it to five.
I think we should do it next year and just have it count as like one or two. It's fun to have a guy to root for it to get hit by pitch.

Speaker 9 Yeah, I do like that, but 10 points probably a little bit.

Speaker 9 It's a little weighted too high.

Speaker 1 Did you listen to the Holdingers Only draft? Yeah. Wow.

Speaker 1 That's

Speaker 1 incredible. Well, it was not good.
Well,

Speaker 9 you messaged me and you're like, it's good. You got to check it out.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you couldn't stop listening after the first round because I think you were a first-round pick.

Speaker 9 Yeah, I kept it going. I was just sitting around in my hotel hotel room playing some PS5.
So

Speaker 9 I ran through it.

Speaker 1 Listening to us, butcher names, butcher teams.

Speaker 7 Everybody was injured that I drafted.

Speaker 9 Yeah. Yeah, there was a lot of injured people.
Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 7 Jordan Alvarez is back, though. He's on a little tear.

Speaker 1 Good pick. Yeah.
Thank you. It was a great pick.

Speaker 7 I just didn't happen to know that he got injured literally the night before we did the Dingers-only draft.

Speaker 1 I picked a guy with Vertigo.

Speaker 1 Who's that? Mount Castle.

Speaker 9 on the Oreos. But he's back.
He is pretty silly.

Speaker 1 Yes, he is hitting Dingers now. But it's hard to pick a guy in your fantasy draft and then be like, he's got vertigo? Yeah, that's tough.

Speaker 9 Yeah,

Speaker 9 that's not going to be good for hitting a baseball either.

Speaker 7 My hit-by-pitch guy only drafted because he was an AWL. And then I go and I scroll through his Twitter.
And the last tweet that he put out was like, thank you for all the prayers. I'm doing okay.

Speaker 7 Hope to make it back on the field again soon. Because he got drilled in his head.

Speaker 1 Oh, this is Josh Smith.

Speaker 7 Yeah, and now I feel like an asshole because I'm now rooting for him to get hit by more pitches when he was seriously injured by the last one he got. Yeah, it's a little fucked up.

Speaker 7 It was fucked up, but we made our piece. We're on, I told you.

Speaker 1 Because you guys are good now.

Speaker 7 I told him, like, put your hip into it next time.

Speaker 9 But the problem is, he's going to be getting out of the way a lot quicker.

Speaker 1 Yeah, exactly.

Speaker 9 So that's, if you look at it from a draft standpoint,

Speaker 7 actually, I do have one more question because we were in the batting cages last week on Grit Week, and we stepped into the 80-mile-per-hour cage. And Max was raking, by the way.

Speaker 7 Max is like a pretty good hitter, it turns out.

Speaker 1 Matt Stairs of CAA.

Speaker 7 That's what they called him.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 7 And I stepped in there. I saw the ball coming in 80 miles an hour.
I was like, holy shit. When I watch baseball on TV and I see a guy get hit by an 80-mile per hour pitch, I'm like, oh, that's easy.

Speaker 7 Yeah, lean in that one. Take that one for the team.
That must hurt like shit, doesn't it? Even though it's 80 miles per hour?

Speaker 1 80 is not bad.

Speaker 9 You get up 95 and up is where it really starts getting you. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Does 80 look like softball for you?

Speaker 9 Yeah, I mean, think about it. That's Hendrix change up.
Yeah. And just watching him on TV, it looks like it never gets there Yeah, compared to the other guys.
It's crazy.

Speaker 1 Not trying to shit on Hendrix. No, no.
He's a great pusher, but he's low velocity.

Speaker 9 But I mean, based off what we're seeing, 80 is like a.

Speaker 1 Yeah, because how fast do they throw when they're throwing you BP? Those are still zipping them in, like 60, 65.

Speaker 9 Yeah, but they're closer. So

Speaker 9 it's playing more like 85, 90.

Speaker 7 That's what it was at that batting cage.

Speaker 1 It was way closer. I remember I took BP at a minor league 50.

Speaker 9 If you weren't full and it was going 80, then it's probably

Speaker 9 there pretty good.

Speaker 7 That makes sense.

Speaker 1 I took BP at a minor league field once Hank was there and I'd like, I just kept on missing. I was like, can you guys slow it down? I was like, they're like, this is kind of what we pitch it at.

Speaker 1 I was like, well, I can't hit this.

Speaker 9 Well, I've done it before. Actually, funny story is my first BP of big league spring training, Bob Melvin, was throwing BP to me.
That's a manager with Oakland.

Speaker 9 And I swung and missed at the first pitch.

Speaker 1 And I was like,

Speaker 1 I'm never fucking playing in the big league.

Speaker 9 I'm like, they're going to send me down tomorrow and never call for me back.

Speaker 7 Billy Beans up in the up in the suite, like Joaquin Phoenix and Gladiator, just thumbs down.

Speaker 1 Yeah, like, get him gone.

Speaker 1 Oh, man. Well, Matt, thank you so much, man.
We had a great time having you on. You were a recurring guest.
You'll be back on.

Speaker 9 Appreciate it. Hopefully, 24 hours after the World Series.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we go. Yes.
We're going to hold you to it. The Cubs can't do it.
I don't think they can.

Speaker 16 Man, I'll tell you what. When you're hungry out there, you start acting like a rookie quarterback in his first game, making bad decisions, messing up the basics, being all out of sorts.

Speaker 16 That's where Snickers comes in, man. That thing is packed.
Roasted peanuts, nugget, caramel, milk chocolate. It's like the MVP of candy bars.

Speaker 16 And when you bite into it, boom, it sorts you out, gets your head back in the game of life, satisfying your hunger. Remember this: Snickers handles your hunger so you can handle everything else.

Speaker 16 Snickers satisfies, man. That's a winning play.

Speaker 1 Okay, Mount Rushmore time. We're doing the Mount Rushmore of rookie mistakes.
What is the standings right now? It is as tight as it's ever been.

Speaker 11 Hank and Max on Heater with 21.

Speaker 11 And then we have a tie. Me and Billy, 19.
Big Cat PFT, 19.

Speaker 7 And so

Speaker 4 a lot of games left.

Speaker 7 Billy has been contributing to your part of

Speaker 1 the skash force, right? Yes. So the last Mount Rushmore will be

Speaker 1 the Friday before Labor Day, officially.

Speaker 7 Did Billy submit FBI?

Speaker 11 That was me.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's crazy.

Speaker 9 I thought Billy would do MAGA.

Speaker 1 It's just.

Speaker 1 Yeah, cute.

Speaker 4 A lot of grammar people are saying some of these weren't even acronyms.

Speaker 1 What are those people's problems?

Speaker 4 I don't know.

Speaker 1 Which one isn't an acronym?

Speaker 4 Acronym has to also be like a word or something.

Speaker 1 Oh. Like something that you can pronounce?

Speaker 4 It's like BJ wasn't OTPH. But it's J wasn't.

Speaker 1 What?

Speaker 7 You missed Obgen.

Speaker 4 Missed Obgen.

Speaker 1 Thought it would have done well.

Speaker 1 Scuba was one that we missed. Scuba just rules.

Speaker 1 Okay. Mount Rushmore rookie mistakes.
What is the order?

Speaker 12 The order is Bicat PFT, me and Billy, Hank and Max.

Speaker 11 Okay.

Speaker 1 We have our 1-1. I'll just go with the PFT.
Look, we don't even have to do numbers. You did a little numbers before.
Nope. Mount Rushmore rookie mistakes,

Speaker 1 eating more of an edible because you can't feel it. Mm-hmm.

Speaker 1 Total rookie mistake.

Speaker 7 Your first time having an edible, you eat maybe half the brownie, and you're like, well, it's been 30 minutes. I don't feel anything yet.
I'm not high. I'll just have the other half.

Speaker 7 And then you find yourself in hell for about 10 hours.

Speaker 4 I thought I died in Vegas one time. Yeah.

Speaker 4 We were there doing a podcast. AWL came and gave me a bunch of edibles, and I was editing the podcast.
So I took a little bit as I was editing. I was like, oh, I don't feel it.

Speaker 1 I don't feel it.

Speaker 4 Took a bunch more. And then I was in bed in the fetal position.
And I felt like my life was fading away. Like, I couldn't open my eyes, and I was like, I'm fading to black.
This is it, rest in peace.

Speaker 4 And then I remembered reading all the submissions of people being like, I ate too many edibles, thought I was gonna die. And then I was like, Oh, it's no, this is just me right now.

Speaker 1 It's a very relatable mistake that I think anyone who's had any weed or any edible has made this mistake. It is the ultimate rookie mistake.

Speaker 1 I have, I remember I've done it where, like, I've done it with mushrooms too, where it's like, oh, eat a little bit, and then, oh, I don't feel anything. Oh, let me eat the rest of it.

Speaker 1 And then, holy fuck, I'm on the moon.

Speaker 7 Yeah, it takes way longer to hit. So if you're just smoking, then it, you know, you get high almost immediately.
But if you eat something, your body has to metabolize it.

Speaker 7 I did in college one time, and the first time I ever ate brownies, I woke up very high the next day at about 11 o'clock. I had an oral presentation I had to give in my class at one, still very high.

Speaker 7 I just got up there and coughed, pretended I was sick. Yeah.
And then sped through my presentation about five minutes. And I was like, everybody knows I'm high right now.
Yeah. It's terrible.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 It's, it's a bad, bad scene. I oftentimes will eat just a little bit to try to like ease into it, and then I'll get impatient and eat the whole thing, and then it's a bad, bad move.

Speaker 7 Uh, okay, Hank and Max, Max, were you telling me about a restaurant the other day where

Speaker 7 everything on the menu has weed in it?

Speaker 1 That sounds like an idea. Yeah, that was that was bad, that was a bad idea.

Speaker 7 That's a terrible, that's the worst idea for a restaurant ever. Yeah, you're just you just get higher and higher, and then people just must like not ever leave.

Speaker 14 Yeah, there's a point when you're doing that where munchies go into reverse and

Speaker 1 I like couldn't eat anymore. I was so high that the thought of eating more and getting more high disgusted me.

Speaker 14 And the food tasted really good, which was the problem.

Speaker 1 And that's the worst part about edibles too is like once you hit that point, you can't turn it off. You just have to ride it.

Speaker 1 Shower, nap, nothing. Nothing fixes it.
Okay, Jake and Billy.

Speaker 11 We are going to go with shitting after showering.

Speaker 1 Okay. Okay.
Okay. Yeah.

Speaker 3 Yeah. It's a bad

Speaker 1 mistake. There's a repeat of plan.

Speaker 7 Did you just just say the S-word?

Speaker 1 We did.

Speaker 6 Wow. Kick them off.

Speaker 11 We wanted it on the graphic.

Speaker 1 Out of here. Yeah.
Out of here.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Hank and Max.

Speaker 4 We're going to go with swallowing dip spit.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
Yep. Good one.

Speaker 4 First time I dipped, swallowed it, puked everywhere. I also had braces, so that was just a disaster.

Speaker 11 I accidentally drank your dip spit the other day.

Speaker 1 That was Billy's fault. I had a water bottle.
I just spit it somewhere. Billy just gave him my water bottle.
Gave me a water bottle. And there was like a little sip left.
Oh, no, Jesus. Disgusting.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's the cousin to what Hank. Hank is talking about swallowing your own dip spit, but the cousin to that is drinking out of any bottle near a dipper.

Speaker 4 And then we will go with parlaying a bunch of heavy favorites.

Speaker 1 What do you mean? That seems like an insult fact.

Speaker 7 Yeah, what do you mean, Hank?

Speaker 1 We're going to have to go to John Angelos in the booth.

Speaker 4 It never works.

Speaker 4 It's a rookie mistake.

Speaker 4 I'm going to parlay a bunch of heavy favorites.

Speaker 7 Oh, that's right, because the Celtics beat the Heat in the conference finals this year, right?

Speaker 4 Was that a parlay?

Speaker 1 Yeah, it actually was a parlay.

Speaker 1 He did the Panthers when they were up 3-0 in the 15th century.

Speaker 4 That was a couple of heavy favorites.

Speaker 7 Yeah, you just said parlaying multiple heavy favorites.

Speaker 4 I said a bunch.

Speaker 1 Okay. That's a bunch.
No, but that's a classic.

Speaker 14 Like, someone just starts gambling. They're like, oh, there's no way all of these can lose.
And then

Speaker 1 you don't agree?

Speaker 7 No, I agree. That seems also like a bunch of people.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I have a different gambling one. But yeah,

Speaker 1 that plays. I like it.

Speaker 1 I'm not protesting the pick. I just said all I said was it seemed like an insult.

Speaker 4 It's not an insult pick.

Speaker 3 PFT.

Speaker 1 Well, and

Speaker 1 for the PFT did a couple.

Speaker 7 Artists formerly known as the Can't Lose Parlay.

Speaker 1 Yeah, although that was sometimes that's underdogs as well. Right.
Yeah.

Speaker 7 Well, Hank did a hit.

Speaker 1 What? My parlay. That was a couple.

Speaker 4 I said a bunch, so you're just taking offense to something that was not directed at you. No, that's fine.

Speaker 1 Our next pick is

Speaker 1 thinking that you do a bunch of hungry dogs one year and then the next year you'll be able to hit all of of them.

Speaker 4 It was profitable a couple years ago. I think in the past two years it's been overall profitable.
Yeah, okay.

Speaker 1 Yeah, because of the extra Saturday.

Speaker 4 You do candlestick artworks all the time?

Speaker 1 Okay, Jake and Billy.

Speaker 1 It's a good pick. Yeah, I know.
It was an insult pick, but it's a good pick.

Speaker 4 Yeah, it doesn't matter.

Speaker 11 Our next pick is going to be forgetting to put on sunscreen.

Speaker 1 Oh, okay. Okay.
Tan.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I like getting a little tan little.

Speaker 11 Yeah, but if you're out there too long and it's like all I could have done was just a 30-second spray, that would have changed everything.

Speaker 7 I still think that there should be a booth where you can just walk through it and they spray it like it's a spray tan booth and they have it on the beach on the boardwalk.

Speaker 7 You just walk through it, put your arms at the side, and it just hoses you down sunscreen, then you're good for the day. Yeah.
Five bucks a pop.

Speaker 11 Yeah, it's just, it stings. I mean, I have very sensitive skin, but

Speaker 11 it can change everything.

Speaker 1 It can, everything. It can change everything.

Speaker 7 It is bad to do that on your first day of vacation. You get sunburned right off the bat.

Speaker 11 You had a bad a few weeks ago, right?

Speaker 7 I was fine. I was fine.
It was totally fine.

Speaker 1 I was fine after that.

Speaker 1 Okay, we have two.

Speaker 4 We have two. Yeah, that's how snake works.

Speaker 7 All right, for our second pick, Darren Revelle knows this one very well.

Speaker 1 Oh, I like it.

Speaker 7 I'm going to go with putting the top down on your convertible in a parade in Dallas, Texas. Bad idea.
Rookie mistake. It sounds great.
I mean, the weather's nice. It's beautiful.

Speaker 7 You know, your wife's there with you.

Speaker 1 Her ass is out.

Speaker 7 You want to have a great time.

Speaker 1 Careful.

Speaker 9 Careful. She was.

Speaker 1 Jackie Old got that far. She was there.

Speaker 7 dog but um not a good idea you want to blast your music let everybody hear what you're listening to um no keep keep the top up yes rookie mistake uh

Speaker 1 rookie mistake saying you'll be able to pull out in time don't worry about it babe i got this i got this i got it i got it big time rookie mistake

Speaker 1 i feel like that's the opposite of it

Speaker 1 what

Speaker 14 i feel like it if you

Speaker 1 pulling out in time is a veteran is a veteran move no saying you like being like I can do this. Yeah, believing in yourself, and you don't.
Yeah.

Speaker 14 You understand the pick. Yeah, no, I don't understand the pick.
Go ahead.

Speaker 1 Let's be neither. All right.
Okay.

Speaker 4 Makes no sense. It makes perfect sense.

Speaker 1 Makes zero sense. Yeah.

Speaker 4 Is that why you have three kids?

Speaker 1 No. My God.

Speaker 11 All right. Our next pick.
It's going to be similar to our first one, but different.

Speaker 11 Pooping without checking for toilet paper.

Speaker 1 Good pick. We had it.

Speaker 7 Had it on our list. Yeah.

Speaker 1 It's just

Speaker 1 pooping and sunscreen for you boys. So far, yeah.
Okay.

Speaker 11 But all rookie mistakes.

Speaker 9 Hank, Max?

Speaker 4 We're going to go with

Speaker 4 mixing liquors when you're drinking.

Speaker 4 Have a couple drinks vodka, have a couple drinks tequila, have a couple drinks whiskey. Never ends up good.
Even mixing liquor and beer. I've always liked the

Speaker 4 liquor before beer, you're in the clear, beer before liquor gets you sicker. Yep.
But

Speaker 4 it's something you do when you're younger.

Speaker 4 It never works out you want to just stick stick to one thing or just do a couple you know a little bit of liquor and then drink beer for the rest of the night yep you don't want to switch it up yep good pick uh max i i like i like my

Speaker 4 gym related one more than the travel microwave one oh microwave

Speaker 1 i don't like

Speaker 4 okay no why don't you guys play rock paper suitors not stretching before exercise oh all right okay i never stretch before exercising but yeah but i also don't exercise then you get hurt it's basically like it's a rookie mistake people don't do, and then they get hurt, and then they have to stretch every time.

Speaker 1 We'll talk about mine as honorable men. Okay.
All right. That's an okay pick.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we'll see.

Speaker 4 Should let Nexko.

Speaker 1 All right. In the microwave.

Speaker 7 What's the microwave-related story?

Speaker 1 I can't wait to hear this one, but we'll finish up the draft.

Speaker 11 Jake? All right. Our last pick is going to be leaving too much time on the clock for Patrick Mahomes.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. Good one.
Good pick. That's a rookie mistake.

Speaker 11 Yeah, that's good. You saw it in the Bills playoff game.
You better kneel that ball until the final play happens and do not give him the ball back.

Speaker 7 If you do almost too much time all the time for Patrick Mahomes.

Speaker 3 Yeah, anytime. So that's our final pick.

Speaker 1 Yep. All right.
Okay, PFT.

Speaker 7 Yeah, last one, I think we go the first one.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 7 Drinking on an empty stomach. Yep.
Yep. Forgetting to eat and then having some drinks.

Speaker 4 Gets you drunk faster. No.

Speaker 7 It does, but it also.

Speaker 1 And then you hit that point where you're like, fuck, I really should have put some of that. No, but then you drink it in my body.

Speaker 4 Then you eat, and then you're full, and then it's a complete reset.

Speaker 1 No, I think when you eat when you're drunk, you can't keep drinking.

Speaker 4 Oh, yeah, you get full and then you're like, oh, I'm dead sober.

Speaker 7 I don't think it's almost ever a complete reset.

Speaker 1 I think it actually hurts a lot. Drinking on an empty stomach is a rookie mistake.
Yeah. Just being like, let's go to, let's go.
Party.

Speaker 11 I was like, oh, I was on the wrong side of that.

Speaker 1 Oh, no. What'd you do?

Speaker 1 Fast out. Oh, no.
Did they draw something on you?

Speaker 1 No. Nuts on your face.
You probably had nuts on your face.

Speaker 14 I love how, like, the craziest drinking story is Jake just like falling asleep.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and forgetting to eat a sandwich.

Speaker 1 Did you feel yourself?

Speaker 11 Not that time, but I've done it before.

Speaker 1 Okay, what did we miss? Max, I want to hear this microwave one.

Speaker 14 Putting tinfoil in the microwave.

Speaker 1 Oh, okay.

Speaker 14 Sparks. Like when you're a kid, I feel like every little bit.

Speaker 1 I've never done that. That's what I'm saying.

Speaker 14 Yeah, I've never done that either.

Speaker 14 Well, I did it when I was a little kid, and I was like, oh, I want to heat up this slice of pizza, not knowing that you can't.

Speaker 14 It's a disaster every time. I mean, if you don't, it's the definition of a...

Speaker 3 It's a younger rookie mistake.

Speaker 1 I know your mom listens. That's just bad parenting.
Just being factual.

Speaker 1 I think my kids are not.

Speaker 14 I was the youngest of four. Come on.
Okay.

Speaker 1 And you still don't understand the pullout thing?

Speaker 14 I mean, I understand it.

Speaker 7 So

Speaker 4 stretching or tinfoil.

Speaker 1 I think you went with the right pick. Yeah.

Speaker 7 Putting a spoon in the microwave, too. That does the same thing as tinfoil.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Okay.
Other ones we had

Speaker 1 falling in love on the Jersey Shore. Big-time rookie mistake.
Ronnie taught us that and then fell in love and then had like the most toxic relationship ever uh

Speaker 1 i had so my gambling one was just teasers like thinking like teasers are you know every teaser is gonna win that's a rookie mistake but those make sense yeah i do like teasers i i like them too but i also know i'm at the point now where i know when i tease i'm just teasing myself because you see it and you're like oh this can't lose um flying with a gun Flying with a gun is a rookie mistake.

Speaker 1 Oh, Hank, I had one for you. Max wanted to do flying with a water bottle, which I was like.
You can't do either, though.

Speaker 4 Yeah. I know.

Speaker 1 You can empty it out. Yeah.
I had one for you.

Speaker 11 I get mine taken every time.

Speaker 4 Another one?

Speaker 1 If you're an elementary school teacher signing up and going to space.

Speaker 1 That's a good one. That's a rookie mistake.
I don't get it. You already forgot the challenger.
You literally said you'll never forget.

Speaker 1 You said you'd never forget. Yeah, the O-rings.
Yeah.

Speaker 7 Putting the top down your convertible in Dallas.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's a big rookie mistake. I had another daily one is just asking a woman when she's due without definitively knowing if she's pregnant or not.

Speaker 1 I mean,

Speaker 1 that's a big-time rookie mistake.

Speaker 7 Invading Russia in the wintertime? Yep.

Speaker 1 Taking insurance in blackjack. Yep.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 That's a rookie mistake.

Speaker 11 Showering without getting a towel.

Speaker 1 Yep.

Speaker 17 You're stuck.

Speaker 11 You got to run naked sometimes.

Speaker 1 You ever done that, Jake?

Speaker 3 Of course. We've all done it.

Speaker 1 The nude run? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Oh, we had Darnell Wright, uh the bears first-round pick rookie mistake he trained all offseason for the wide receiver's conditioning test that's a rookie mistake

Speaker 4 yeah i this would come off weird in the graphic but like talking shit to a veteran but like a veteran on your team oh like that's like an actual rookie mistake yeah people do in camp and they'll talk shit and then it comes back to bite them yeah but it would have looked like talking shit to a veteran

Speaker 1 getting mad at a very good player like uh dylan brooks yeah poking the bear Poking the bear is a rookie mistake. Yes.
Yeah. Yes.

Speaker 1 Yeah, like you're just giving bullets important materials. Right.
Rookie mistake.

Speaker 11 Forgetting headphones on a flight.

Speaker 1 Oh, that's a good one.

Speaker 1 That's like the most, you could forget everything, but if you forget headphones, it's the worst flight ever. I lost my headphones on Great Week.

Speaker 4 I'm back to the wireds like an absolute peasant.

Speaker 11 All airlines are pretty much giving free headphones these days.

Speaker 7 They're giving free what?

Speaker 1 Free headphones. Really?

Speaker 7 Just bleep out the word phones.

Speaker 1 Hank, if you're serious about your TikTok game, the wired headphones actually is a way to go. It's better sound quality, just so you know.

Speaker 14 Mean speaker. Talking about your fantasy team while Big Cat's watching a game he gambled on.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
That's a big rookie mistake. We've had that happen a few times.
She's been like, I need a touchdown from this guy. It's like, well, I need this team to win.
Otherwise, I'm done.

Speaker 1 Any other ones we missed? That was a good Mount Rushmore.

Speaker 7 Yeah. Not knocking on your parents' bedroom door.

Speaker 1 Oh, that's bad. That's a yeah.

Speaker 7 Forgetting to knock.

Speaker 1 Forgetting to knock is a very, very bad one. Shit.
That one.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 7 There was somebody that got walked in on twice recently.

Speaker 7 It was some celebrity. Their daughter walked in on them twice on their birthday both times.

Speaker 1 Oh, no. Yeah.

Speaker 7 Oh, it was Kelly Rippa. Oh.
Kelly Rippa's daughter walked in on like her eighth birthday and then her 16th birthday. Oh, jeez.
Mom, I'm getting it in.

Speaker 1 That's scarring. Yeah.
I don't think you can come back from that. You can't.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay. Good Mount Rushmore, everyone? Yeah.
Yeah. No?

Speaker 1 We okay, Hank? Hank? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Let's do roast with Uncle Chaps.

Speaker 1 Okay, let's finish up with some roasts.

Speaker 1 And we have our good friend, Uncle Chaps back.

Speaker 17 I'm so happy.

Speaker 1 It's been a long time, boys. It's been a long time, so long that we forgot to put you in the honorable mentions of the Mount Rushmore.

Speaker 3 Yeah, that was hurtful.

Speaker 17 I thought there was going to be a smaller font, and I was down there.

Speaker 3 I looked and looked and looked.

Speaker 1 Nope.

Speaker 7 No, I mean, I told you, chaps, you're not a guest. You're a part of the show.

Speaker 17 Oh, well, that makes it better.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's what we say to everyone that we forgot.

Speaker 17 Yeah, that's what I'm going to go back. I'm going to find that tweet that I sent and just say that to everybody.

Speaker 1 Yeah, exactly.

Speaker 17 Actually, I'm part of the family.

Speaker 1 What's up in the world of chaps? You've moved?

Speaker 17 Yeah, I moved up here. Super excited to be here.
It's been great so far.

Speaker 1 You're seeing people now. You're like in the office.

Speaker 17 I'm shockingly not as depressed as being in my basement by myself. I wake up every day and I feel like you have a purpose today.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Who here in Chicago?

Speaker 7 Which of the Chicago guys guys have you have you hit it off with?

Speaker 17 Oddly enough, probably White Sox Dave.

Speaker 1 Well, he's I mean White Sox Dave is an ultimate glue guy.

Speaker 17 Yeah, so we I think we're gonna get into some terrariums gonna go find some stuff and make terrariums together.

Speaker 7 Oh Billy's so mad he's not here.

Speaker 1 Terrariums? What is that?

Speaker 17 Yeah, so I fell into big terrarium TikTok and this dude makes like self-contained ecosystems where he'll make it in a little jar and then seal it closed and he's like, you don't have to open it for 60 years.

Speaker 7 Oh, so it's not like a terrarium for a lizard?

Speaker 1 No, for animals.

Speaker 17 It's like a self-contained ecosystem.

Speaker 7 So you just make tiny earth.

Speaker 1 Yeah. So you and White Sox Dave.
I'm the god of it. Yeah.
You and White Sox Dave's big idea is to make a 60-year video. Yeah.
Okay. Got it.
As long as it's long like that. It's long for it.
All right.

Speaker 17 Brought to you by Miracle Grub.

Speaker 1 I did, yeah. I've seen though.
I've seen those videos. There's one guy in like France who did it.

Speaker 3 Yeah, he's got a real sexy voice.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he dropped like one drop of water into his

Speaker 17 big glass thing like 10 years in and then it lived for another 30 years yeah the huge that's the huge one right yeah the huge glass one and the guy looks like a crazy yeah yeah i love that guy okay so you're riding around on a yellow bicycle yeah how's that going fantastic again woke up happy today knowing i was gonna go there and it makes me feel better than drivers because they're sitting at their red lights miserable and i'm cruising fast at 35 that's illegal what do you mean i hate that

Speaker 7 you're the guy that does the we have the same rules except oh no we don't have the same rules there is no rules for the corrections.

Speaker 1 You're just talking through red lights. Tell me the bicyclists.

Speaker 7 What are the rules of the road for bicyclists, then, chaps? What's that? What are the rules of the road for bicyclists?

Speaker 17 There is none. Like,

Speaker 12 I do whatever I want to.

Speaker 3 Like, what are they going to do?

Speaker 17 Is the cop going to be like, oh, you're on your yellow bike? Like, I'm going to give you...

Speaker 3 You don't get a ticket on a yellow bike.

Speaker 4 That's true.

Speaker 7 The cop lights up, pull over.

Speaker 1 It is disarming.

Speaker 17 And then I could be one of those wow, wow, dirt bikes and get out of here. You can't go where I can go.

Speaker 1 True, that's true. Where you go, there are no roads.

Speaker 17 But I have been almost hit a couple times.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I was going to say, it seems very unsafe.

Speaker 17 Yeah, I mean, it is.

Speaker 1 Are you wearing a helmet? Oh, yeah.

Speaker 17 Okay. A helmet.
And every day I reward myself when I arrive safely. I have these little stickers that I put on my yellow helmet, and they are called Safety is Paramount Pancakes.

Speaker 17 And it's kind of like the Ohio Buckeyes.

Speaker 1 I like that. Okay, so when we...

Speaker 7 Just for not dying.

Speaker 3 Every time you don't die on a bike.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 3 Congratulations to me.

Speaker 1 This sounds so tragic because it's going to be like we scraped Chaps' body off the pavement. But he did have 140 stickers on his helmet.

Speaker 17 Yeah, but I need a punishment if I die.

Speaker 3 You guys have to take them all out.

Speaker 1 Oh, taking them all, okay.

Speaker 7 Unceremoniously.

Speaker 12 That'll be like he broke the streak.

Speaker 1 Yes, the streak is over. No more stickers for chaps.

Speaker 1 Okay, so should we do some roasts?

Speaker 17 Yeah, let's do it.

Speaker 7 Have you been reading a lot recently?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 17 No, I haven't been reading aloud. Usually Kate does it on our show.
Yeah. So I haven't been a lot.

Speaker 1 Oh, last question. Do you have, do you want to say anything about your co-host, Khan's,

Speaker 1 basically being like a dementor on Twitter for the last month and a half while he's on paternity leave?

Speaker 17 I'm just glad that everybody else is seeing why I hate Connor.

Speaker 17 It's nice to welcome everybody into that family, too.

Speaker 1 I texted him like maybe week in. I was like, dude.
I know what you're going through. You're going through paternity leave, but you don't have to have a take on everything.

Speaker 17 No, he does. Yeah, he does.

Speaker 3 He really does. He does.

Speaker 1 Which I, I, it was one of those things where at first I was like, what the fuck is going on? And then it got so bad it got good.

Speaker 1 Whereas, like, someone's like, Lasagna, he's like, Lasagna is the worst food ever.

Speaker 17 And he's legit triggered, not like Twitter triggered, because he starts texting me offline. Like, he's like, What do you mean, man? Like, don't you see where I'm coming from?

Speaker 1 Yeah, like, no, I don't. He went after college football fans, he went after Notre Dame, he went after Italians, yeah.

Speaker 17 And he was like, Oh, I don't know why people do this three weeks to football. Can't we just enjoy the summer? Next thing you know, the next week, two weeks till West Point football.

Speaker 7 Yeah, yeah, he's mad about countdowns.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he was mad about countdowns. That was when I was, that's when I got back in on it.
That's when it was so bad it was good when he's like, why are we counting down?

Speaker 3 Which is what we all do.

Speaker 1 We all countdowns.

Speaker 17 We start the day after the Super Bowl.

Speaker 1 What is it starting?

Speaker 7 It's usually like maybe a month or two after. Whenever the days get to a point where it's not depressing to look how far in advance the football season is, that's when I'm back all in at countdowns.

Speaker 7 Yeah.

Speaker 1 That's when

Speaker 1 you're. Oh, yeah.
And it's the random tweet being like seven weeks at this time, you'll be sitting on your couch watching Sunday night football. I'm like, fuck yes.

Speaker 17 And then the Jags have like day 76, and it'll be like Luke Fortner's picture. Like

Speaker 17 some random number 76 you haven't heard of.

Speaker 7 Oh, how are you feeling about all the post-mortems that keep coming out about Urban Meyer? Do you love him as much as we do?

Speaker 7 As a Jags guy?

Speaker 1 I hope.

Speaker 17 I want to give him my yellow bike so he can get in a wreck.

Speaker 1 Take what his podcast

Speaker 12 is fantastic.

Speaker 1 Do you think this is a big year for Trevor Lawrence? This feels like he needs to, because last year we saw it, but it was also not all the way consistent.

Speaker 1 This year it's got to kind of be consistent, right?

Speaker 17 I think he's going to,

Speaker 17 I'm going to put a lot of money on him winning the MVP.

Speaker 1 Wow. Yeah.
Wow.

Speaker 17 Because the odds have got to be insane, right? And he's so good. And now having Calvin Ridley, I don't know if you've seen the clips from their camp.

Speaker 12 Calvin Ridley's a freak.

Speaker 1 He is.

Speaker 17 The Jags might have across the board the best skill positions.

Speaker 7 Listen, I don't know if you could say there's a team, like the Chiefs are pretty good.

Speaker 17 Their skill position players stink. The Eagles are pretty pretty good, but not the skill.

Speaker 1 Yeah, A.J. Brown, Devontae Smith.
Yeah, that's pretty good. Who's their Dallas Goddard? Who's their running back? Okay, let's do AFC.

Speaker 1 AFC.

Speaker 7 Bills are pretty good.

Speaker 1 The Bengals.

Speaker 3 But I don't think it's deep.

Speaker 1 Jamar Chase, Tyler Boyd.

Speaker 17 I'd still go Jax.

Speaker 7 Because the running back. Chargers are pretty good.

Speaker 12 Yeah, but we beat the Chargers.

Speaker 7 Wait, what about the Dolphins?

Speaker 1 Dolphins have like an insane.

Speaker 12 We're in the top five.

Speaker 1 You got to get all the the best skill positions in Florida.

Speaker 7 You know what?

Speaker 1 That's me.

Speaker 1 They don't count.

Speaker 4 I want to let you believe.

Speaker 1 I don't want to bait for MVP.

Speaker 7 I want to let you bait.

Speaker 7 Let chaps believe.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 17 I mean, from years past that go in this high, because even in 2017, after Blake, sorry, when Blake left essentially, I didn't think that they were going to be good again. And now...

Speaker 3 Trevor, baby.

Speaker 17 What a difference a year makes.

Speaker 7 And you guys are monitoring the piss, too.

Speaker 1 Oh, you see those urinals?

Speaker 7 That's huge. The Jacksonville urnals are amazing.

Speaker 17 I want to get get one at my house. I wonder how much they are.

Speaker 7 They're, I think, $2,400.

Speaker 3 I'm not going to get one.

Speaker 7 You pee directly into it and it tells you how hydrated you are.

Speaker 17 But how does it charge? Is it like hydro charged? Or you got to take that bad boy out and plug it into a USB?

Speaker 7 Maybe it's like a turbine, like a dam, so the piss going through the turbine actually powers it.

Speaker 17 I bet that was DARPA, like the military invention people that came up with that.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 1 It's great.

Speaker 1 By the way, I'm sorry that we jumped down your throat there. We have a thing on this show where if someone comes and outtakes us, we get a little upset.
It's territorial. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And you did try to out-take us. I did, yeah.
Because that take is wrong. Yeah, I came in and tried to impress everybody.
Yeah, you said it very confidently. Yeah.
So

Speaker 1 we had to go against it.

Speaker 7 Might sprinkle. I might sprinkle.
Just for chaps.

Speaker 1 Just from chaps saying that? Yeah. He kind of touched me into it.

Speaker 7 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Chaps, let's do some roast. Okay.

Speaker 17 Are we doing it regular? Any voices you want?

Speaker 1 Let's start regular, then maybe we get a voice.

Speaker 17 If I read really poorly, I'm going to switch to a voice like FDR because I'm going to be better.

Speaker 1 You do an FDR? Oh, it's a great FDR. Well, then you you should start with FDR.
Okay.

Speaker 17 The bastard offspring of the Blues Brothers meets the bastard offspring of Wayne and Goth three times weekly to rank the random things in groups of four, talk about living in Chicago, berate junior employees, and insult this supervisor for his poor goth performance and inability to achieve and maintain an erection.

Speaker 1 Oh!

Speaker 18 Five stars.

Speaker 1 That feels like it started as a roast of us and just landed with Hank. Right? Do you see how it goes?

Speaker 17 Not a bad FDR.

Speaker 3 It's not a bad FDR.

Speaker 17 Keep it going or go back to the next one.

Speaker 1 We'll switch back.

Speaker 1 One more? Okay.

Speaker 17 Big Cat looks like a guy that's always accidentally sitting on something nasty that's on his chair. Check under Big Cat's desk.
There is definitely boogers.

Speaker 17 pft's mustache is a mix of hitler and my great aunt still not convinced that pft isn't just a bunch of hamsters sitting on each other's shoulders pretending to be a person

Speaker 12 jake looks like he wears socks to bed not a burn

Speaker 17 more of an observation sometimes yeah hanks upper lip looks like it left to go find his chin oh

Speaker 17 yeah that one was mean yeah

Speaker 1 boogers under the desk is one of the meanest things you could say to someone else.

Speaker 17 No, it's not. That's normal.

Speaker 17 If you have a desk and there's not at least a couple boogers.

Speaker 1 Oh, I don't know. No.

Speaker 1 No? No. No.

Speaker 1 We had a serial. We had a guy that used to.

Speaker 7 Someone used to put their boogers on the wall above the urinal in the old Barcelon Sports office. And it was just, it looked disgusting.

Speaker 1 Didn't Feidelberg say he did that?

Speaker 7 Was that Fights?

Speaker 17 Or maybe he was the one on the investigation.

Speaker 7 Yeah, I think he was in. That's a nasty rumor to start about Fights.

Speaker 1 But I'll go with it. Yeah, me too.

Speaker 7 yeah, it looked like the aggro crag on that wall is gross.

Speaker 6 Yeah, I read so much better in an accent.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you can go slow. Just give us big time Tommy.
Okay.

Speaker 6 The sides of the Great Pyramid are 756 feet long, forming a square that could fit nearly 10 football fields. It's nearly the biggest square in the world.
Second to Jake Mosh.

Speaker 6 Chumley from Past Ponstars recently recently lost an incredible 60 pounds over the first year.

Speaker 6 In an interview, he said his only complaint is that people now mistake him for someone named Max from Party My Table.

Speaker 6 Big Cat looks like Warren Sharp if he ate a donut for every time he promoted his football preview book.

Speaker 1 That's pretty good.

Speaker 7 I recently found out that his name's actually not Warren Sharp. Oh.
And it's Sharp because he's a gambler.

Speaker 1 Oh. I'm for the record, I'm a fucking moron for not realizing that.
No, it's fine.

Speaker 7 I was like, wow, this gambling guy, his last name's Sharp. What an incredible stroke of luck.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Tiger Golf.

Speaker 6 PFT looks like Chris Stapleson's younger sister.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 6 Chaps looks like the love child of Max Crosby and Kramer.

Speaker 1 Ooh. Okay.

Speaker 1 I don't know if I'm going to be able to do that. I've seen Max Crosby.

Speaker 17 Yeah, but what about Kramer?

Speaker 7 The racist part? N-word guy.

Speaker 6 You can tell Hank's breath smells like shit, because that's the old school way.

Speaker 1 Hey, that was a good one. I like that.
All right, I'm going to go back to FDR. All right, okay.

Speaker 17 Max face looks like a turtle shell with a face drawn on it by an overly confident ambidextrous child. PFT looks like Hulk Hogan after being a quarter cremated.

Speaker 1 That was a a good one. That's good.

Speaker 17 Big Cat looks like he makes a fresh pot of sugar for his stellar blue right before he butters his hair every morning.

Speaker 1 Buttering my hair.

Speaker 17 Jake looks like he thanks a person right before being roasted by them. And Hank looks like he sends his families updates about his workouts.

Speaker 3 Yes, facts.

Speaker 17 Facts. I think it's the last one.
Okay.

Speaker 1 3.30.

Speaker 4 Two days in.

Speaker 17 You boys look look like a diagram of evolution of man. Jake in the front course, but ultimately a convincing argument that maybe a species can evolve too far for its own good.

Speaker 17 Obviously, Max is a knuckle-dragging in the back. That motherfucker is an evolution immune.
Seen a Max figurine of him at the Natural Science Museum.

Speaker 17 PFT is a hunter-gatherer, but too slow to hunt and not tall enough to gather any of the good stuff.

Speaker 1 That was good. It feels good to get a roast.
Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it feels like

Speaker 1 therapeutic. Yeah.

Speaker 17 Yeah, I'm surprised there wasn't better ones about me. I look like Kramer.

Speaker 3 There's lots of stuff to roast.

Speaker 1 Well, I think just people watching YouTube.

Speaker 17 Remember when you were depressed for 11 years?

Speaker 1 Remember when you shaved your beard? Yeah, that was rough.

Speaker 7 You got creamed by Boris?

Speaker 17 I think I'm completely cured of banana-induced pink eye, though.

Speaker 1 Oh, that's great. Well, that's a huge step.

Speaker 17 Yeah, I actually believe in antibiotics now, turns out.

Speaker 1 Really? They were. Science.
Trust science.

Speaker 7 Is there a banana here?

Speaker 1 I'm not doing it. No.
I mean, I don't want to reinfect.

Speaker 7 No, no, no. Talk a strong game, Japan.

Speaker 1 No, no, no.

Speaker 12 Oh, I'll do it.

Speaker 17 I need to raise some money for a VFW that I'm helping. Okay.
And I'm willing to sell ad space on my yellow helmet. Okay.
To anybody that wants to do it.

Speaker 7 I like it. It's a good cause.

Speaker 17 So if you go to barstoolsports.com slash wins for warriors, you could do that.

Speaker 7 Love it. Love it.
Chaps, I have one last question for you. The boys recently went out and played some paintball, competitive paintball against each other.

Speaker 7 As a combat veteran, I'm just curious to know what you think our combat styles would be like in paintball.

Speaker 1 Ooh.

Speaker 17 I could see.

Speaker 1 Billy was part of this as well.

Speaker 7 Yes, Billy was definitely a part of this.

Speaker 17 I feel like Billy's just the kind of guy that just runs around.

Speaker 17 We call that praying and spraying in the biz.

Speaker 1 I think that's kind of what he would do.

Speaker 17 I could see you just sitting on the sidelines making observations about how everything reminds you of World War II.

Speaker 17 Different ones. Hank, I think because he's the supervisor now, he's just doing a little supervise and bringing in different people, trying to get the right teams together to make the

Speaker 17 camaraderie as good as it can be. I think you are probably in the rear

Speaker 17 with the gear, Dan, like just eating donuts and shit,

Speaker 17 waiting to get discharged.

Speaker 17 I think we have logistics guy and Jake that he's bringing.

Speaker 1 You can see that?

Speaker 17 Like that he's bringing the bombs, bullets, and band-aids. Yeah.

Speaker 17 And I think Max was too fat to serve.

Speaker 1 Oh,

Speaker 1 there.

Speaker 1 All right, chaps, you want to guess a number?

Speaker 17 Yeah, I'd love to.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Right now? Yeah, go for it.

Speaker 17 76.

Speaker 1 I'll go 69.

Speaker 1 91.

Speaker 1 Max?

Speaker 1 20.

Speaker 1 Here we go.

Speaker 1 Six.

Speaker 4 Six. Great number.

Speaker 1 All right. Thank you, chaps.
As always, everyone go subscribe to ZBT.

Speaker 1 Appreciate you always coming on.

Speaker 3 All right. I love you guys.

Speaker 1 Love you, chaps. Oh, yeah.
And we'll see everyone on Friday.

Speaker 7 Love you guys.

Speaker 1 Our brain is the only organ that knows it exists and named itself. Whoa.

Speaker 1 Think about that.

Speaker 9 Whoa. Also, new fun facts.

Speaker 1 Facts. Well, I found a fact page, so I'm going to just start doing facts instead of Billy.
Think about that, though. Our brain is the only organ that knows it exists and named itself.

Speaker 9 Whoa. Yeah.

Speaker 1 That fucked me up for a while last night.

Speaker 7 I feel like I'm on acid.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Why did the brain decide to stay there?

Speaker 1 Don't give your way.

Speaker 1 I don't know what I'd say, I'd say it anyway.

Speaker 1 Days are not days to buy. Shy away,

Speaker 1 I'll be coming for your love of gay. Shy it away.

Speaker 1 I'll be coming for your love of gay. Take

Speaker 1 on

Speaker 1 way.

Speaker 1 Smelling them in the body is okay.

Speaker 1 Say you're me.

Speaker 1 Are you ready to say you're sorry? Say you're me.

Speaker 1 Are you ready to say you're sorry? Take

Speaker 1 on

Speaker 1 me.

Speaker 1 Take on me. Take

Speaker 1 me.

Speaker 1 Take on me.

Speaker 1 I'll

Speaker 1 be

Speaker 1 something

Speaker 1 to you today.

Speaker 1 Just to play my early

Speaker 1 things I've got to remember. You're shy and away.

Speaker 1 I'll be coming for you to do anyway. You're shy and away.

Speaker 1 I'll be coming for you to do anyway.

Speaker 1 Take

Speaker 1 on

Speaker 1 me.

Speaker 1 Take on me.

Speaker 1 Take

Speaker 1 me.

Speaker 1 Take on me.

Speaker 1 I'll

Speaker 1 be

Speaker 1 your

Speaker 1 faith.

Speaker 1 I'll keep

Speaker 1 going

Speaker 1 through the ocean.