Kenny "The Jet" Smith, Sixers/Celtics Game 7 Has Arrived, NFL Schedule Release And Fyre Fest Of The Week

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Exclude to white. On today's part of my take, we have Kenny the Jet Smith in studio.
Great interview with Kenny Smith. We've had him on the show before, never in studio.
He's got a new book out, tells us some great stories. We have Celtics Sixers game seven.
We're going to talk some Warriors Lakers, hockey playoffs, NFL schedule getting released, and Firefest of the Week. The Barstool Golf Time app makes it easy for golfers to find the best tee times at the best prices.
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Okay, let's go. There is violence and then a lot of work to be done.

No place to hang out or wash in.

And then I can't blame all on the sun.

Oh, no.

We're gonna rock down to Electric Avenue.

And then we'll take it higher.

Oh, we're gonna rock down to Electric Avenue. It's part of my take.

It's ended by Barstool Sports Welcome to Pardon My Take Today is Friday, May, what is the date? 12th, May 12th And we have Sixers-Celtics Game 7 What we wanted all along,. PFT has transpired maximum pain for one of these two gentlemen.
I like what you did there. Hank is on another on another level, but we should.
Oh, you know what? Fuck it, Hank. Go ahead.
Say whatever you want to say. Jason Tatum was insane at the end.
Terrible game for three quarters. Looked so lost.
And his dog came out, and he started whapping threes, and the Celtics take the game in Philadelphia, and now we get game seven, soul patch on the line. It's going to be incredible.
Kind of ironic. I guess it fits that right when his dog came out, that's when it hurts Max the most.
saw it we saw it happen i mean marcus smart all-time dog guy for sure you knew that this was going to be marcus smart game from the start but tatum stunk out loud for three quarters he was one for 13 in the first three quarters hank don't do the uh not really stunk out loud body language at me jason tatum sucked for three quarters offensive He was 0 for 6. He was 0 for 6 and 3.
PFT, you got to understand, and we'll let Hank talk in a second here. He is the true definition of frontrunner Hank.
He was a baby on Tuesday night. Didn't speak for the entire stream tonight.
He's floating and rubbing it in everyone's face, so we will let him speak. But yeah, Tatum was bad for the first three quarters.
He couldn't hit anything. He was missing layups.
He was missing everything. But what I've said all playoffs about Tatum, if you're a top five guy, and actually he said it after the game, humbly I'm one of the best players in the world.
If you're that guy, you have to be able to take your team out of the depths of hell in those moments. that's exactly what he did and I actually like as bad as the first three quarters were what he did in the fourth quarter that's what counts that's what it is sure no I agree with you I'm saying he's stunk in the first three quarters but obviously his fourth quarter and the big threes that he hit it was like one after another after another buried the Sixers every time it felt like the Sixers might be able to bring it close, bring within five or six points, make it a game.
I just don't like what Hank's doing right now. Let's not whitewash what Hank did on last part of my take.
It wasn't just the fact that he was silent. It was also the fact that you also, you wanted to make everybody else silent.
You took your headphones off and then you had diarrhea four times during the show. Yeah, faked it.
Faked a stomach ailment. Yeah.
Regardless if it was fake or if it was real, your butt caused a scene. It caused a scene for the listeners.
So before you comment on this, I'd like you to apologize for your butt last show. I apologize.
I had some stomach issues. Hand up.
That's on me. As far as the other comments, I would just say shock like, you know, shocker that I was upset after we lost and I'm happy after we win.
I guess that's, you know, I guess that's called front running. I don't really understand.
No, no. The issue is we do do a show.
We do streams and we do a podcast where you have to vocalize your pain. You have to vocalize what's going on.
So to go silent, it's not the best for the audience.

But listen, you won the game.

You get to gloat.

You get to rub it in.

Max is as miserable as I've seen him since the Eagles lost the Super Bowl.

He's slamming doors.

He's screaming.

He is as sad as sad could be.

So this is your moment, Hank, because this is what we wanted all along, PFT.

We wanted it to flip-flop back and forth between maximum happiness, which you're seeing on Hank's face right now, and pain, which you're seeing on Max's face. And it's gone back and forth all series long.
We get game seven. One of these guys is going to be beyond devastated.
So, Hank, it's your moment. Yeah, listen, that felt like a game we were going to lose.
I was nervous. I guess, again, I don't watch games.
I guess I'm a little bit pessimistic. I get nervous when, you know, I get nervous.
I wouldn't know if you're pessimistic because you didn't speak. That's just not true.
We can check the tapes. Big Cat's being a sourpuss.
No, I'm not. I'm just saying.
No, it's fine. But it felt like a game that with Tatum, the way Tatum was playing, they had the most turnovers they've had in the playoffs.
It felt like, you know, the game was series was slipping away, potentially the team was slipping away, and to pull that game out when everyone was talking shit about Tatum for him to have that third quarter. You were talking shit about Tatum.
You were the one who was talking about Tatum. Stone cold at Trink.
Oh no, like, woe is me, woe is me. No one believed in Tatum except for me.
You were like the number one guy up there. Am I one? I'm one of everyone, right? That was not the tone that you were giving.
I said the word everyone, which I would qualify in that category, correct? Usually you would say everyone, including myself. Correct.
Thank you. Thank you, Mr.
Combinator. No, I mean, again, this is where you guys are trying to put words in my mouth.
I tweeted in the third quarter. No, when you say everyone, it does sound like it's like everyone but me.
I tweeted, Tatum has to do something, all caps, anything. He did.
He came out. He did what he had to do.
And stealing that game in Philly, all the momentum's going our way, and I just feel like I feel lucky. I feel good.
Momentum doesn't matter. That's one thing that I've learned is momentum means nothing.
Because going into this game, all the momentum was going towards the Sixers. After the Celtics won two, it looked like the Sixers were dead.
Momentum means nothing. Game seven is one game.
Throw out everything else. Game seven is everything.
Nothing matters what happened in the past. Nothing.
So, Max, question for you, Max. Do you think you should have won Game 3 like PFT and I told you? I don't give a fuck about Game 3.
All I care about is Game 7. I wish they won tonight.
That's what I wish would happen. We told you to win Game 3.
We did say that. We told you had to win Game 3.
Max, do you regret not making tonight a must win? No It felt like a must win You know what's a must win? Game seven, must fucking win Are you sure? Yes Because every time I've said it, you've been like, I don't know Yeah, and every time I say it's a must win They win the fucking game Alright, so you're declaring it officially a must win Yes, game four was a must win, game seven's a must win Max, what did you see? You were up two with four minutes left. It felt like this was going to be it because Tatum was bad.
You say up two with four minutes left. At home.
Like this is some epic collapse. No, no, no.
I'm not saying it like that. I'm saying you're up two, four minutes left.
Tatum has not been able to hit a single shot. It did feel like this was the game,ers like james harden was atrocious i'm not pft i don't want to say this because i think max might hit someone in this room but we did say that james james harden towards the end of series sometimes you know his his abilities start to decrease that happens just sort of it's a fact based on reality based on what's happening what happened in game seven now i i'm going to stand up for james harden a little bit because there were a lot of instances in the fourth quarter and the third quarter where james harden was doing exactly what he should have been doing which was driving directly at the basket making the defense commit and then making the right pass out to the wing and they missed a lot of open three pointers that should have been easy assist for James Harden he was making the right calls in those situations well he did some he did some other bad stuff I agree but the rest of his team let him down too I'm going to stand up for James Harden now that's not saying that I'm anticipating like if you have James Harden and Doc Rivers with their powers combined in a game seven that doesn't look very good for the 76ers on, but he did some good things in the second half tonight that probably we'd be singing a different tune.
If his teammates had made a couple more shots. Yes.
His teammates missed shots. I also do.
I'll go the other way with James Harden. He, what happens sometimes when his game isn't looking great is he just runs into the middle of the lane and looks for contact instead of trying to score the basketball that happened a few different times also at the end of the game just give the ball to him beat like he he is your mvp he was incredible defensively tonight he had flashes where he was scoring at will like don't trust like like a lot of the sixers guys they didn't want the ball and i i don't know i mean maybe that maybe that's like a team thing, but like, a lot of the Sixers guys, they didn't want the ball.

And I don't know.

I mean, maybe that's, like, a team thing, but, like, they're not – you know what I mean?

They didn't really want the ball.

You don't think they wanted the ball?

No.

No.

The way they shot, like, how tense they looked, I think that's a part of the game

where it's like you got to get Embiid the touches every single time down the court.

They tried to force it to Embiid a few times,

and the defense was definitely doing things.

Credit to Missoulo for making some adjustments because they were trying to deny him the ball a lot down the stretch you got to hit open shots i would also say shout out you know in games like this when your stars aren't playing as good as they can be in the first three quarters the bench stepped up brogdon had a huge game smart had a huge game white played well those are. Those are the contributions.
Stop hitting the table. It's making noise.
He's going to say it. It is.
It's making noise. People are going to be mad on the podcast.
He yelled at someone else yesterday for doing that. It was also him.
Oh, it was also him. I'm looking out for the listeners.
No, bench played well. I'm looking out for the listeners.
They're going to be pissed When it's just constant bang on the table Go Hank Don't get mad because I'm trying You're the executive producer You know that listeners are going to be upset If there's constant bang on the table We got a lot of tension in this room You hate me for some reason I're a viewer that you hate me for some reason. I don't hate you.

I just said don't bang the table.

But you said don't bang the table.

I love that Big Cat is doing everything in his power just to get under both Hank and Max's skin at the time.

And then acting surprised when they both get to the top.

No, no, but that one, I am doing that.

But you don't even know Big Cat.

I am doing that.

But that one moment, I was not trying to get under his skin whatsoever. He was banging the table.
He did it twice. And I told him to stop.
He was hurting my ears, yeah. And I was like, stop doing it again.
Yeah, I wasn't trying to get under his skin. No, listen, you should talk about the banging of the table.
Yeah, don't bring it up at all. Don't bring it up.
Don't tweet at us. Yeah, because if you think I'm going to be worried about that, you're crazy.
Hank, go ahead. Talk about the bench without being on the table.
The bench stepped up. They picked up Jason Tatum and Jalen Brown.
They didn't get off to the hottest start. Brogdon picked it up.
Yeah, Brogdon was very good. He was hitting some early threes.
And they kept them in the game so that in the fourth quarter the stars could shine. And it was crazy.
And Robert Williams, go. The coaching decision to start him, I don't know what they were thinking, why they waited so late to do that.
I think he was plus 18. Unbelievable performance.
They showed that stat too where the Celtics with Robert Williams in the starting lineup, like that specific five was like, it was something ridiculous. Like 35 and 12.
Yeah. So why did it take so long? I i don't know i think it was i i don't know because he was hurt uh at the end of the year so maybe they're i don't know i really don't know but he's so much fun to watch yeah i can see why his teammates play like things might break a little bit differently when he's on the court just because he sets a tone and if i like get amped up watching a guy play from my couch his teammates are probably like fuck yeah he's in the game let's go and it's like imagine if he you know if you're looking at his stats like he was on nba live or something his offense is like 20 imagine if he if he could have any semblance of an offensive game besides dunks he would be mvp yeah it is it is pretty much just dunks but the dunks were there like they were they were lobbing it to him they were he was he was all over the place the marcus smart play towards the end i like to think that was intentional i say that was intentional oh yeah when he when he hit a bank shot that was looked like a lob or are you talking about you know no i'm talking about a different one where he drove to the basket and then he threw up an awkward shot that went right into Marcus Williams hands.
Oh, yes for an awesome

dunk. I think that was actually

now loop. I think he was trying to do that.

Hank confidence

going into game seven.

Hi couldn't be higher could

not be higher. I like I said, I just

feel lucky. I feel like

things are turning

my way. I just feel like

it's you know, it's been a good night. It's going to be a good weekend.
Sunday is going to be great. I just feel like it's been a good night.

It's going to be a good weekend.

Sunday's going to be great.

I just feel like good things are coming for me. Look at the way Hank's fucking sitting right now.

He has his feet up at the table.

It's disrespectful.

PFT, have you ever seen your knee while you're sitting at that chair?

Absolutely not.

I have a hard and fast rule.

I observe like Victorian England rules, which is you're not allowed to see anything below.

Shut the fuck up, Hank. See, he's annoying, annoying pft yeah no and you know what you know what when big cat just asked you there after all these years doing this show and big cat asked you the question where's your confidence meter at you have not learned a damn thing from doing part of my take because you're like all time high we got this this is celtics is gonna be great weekend celtics easy and seven you're confident you're the you're so high right now you're so basically i'm paraphrasing classic but your confidence is at an all-time high right now which just means that the loss that might be impending on you will just crush you like an ant no that's that's the loser mentality of a Commanders fan or a Bears fan.

That's not how I think.

An actual city of champions, Game 7, best two words in sports.

Oh, wait, I thought it was hard being a Boston sports fan.

Do you know what I've had to go through this week?

Do you know what it's like watching a game?

He's had to not talk on two different streams this week.

This week, yeah, this week.

All right, so, Max, your confidence going into game seven anyone's game oh no anyone's game what do you want me to say oh there's your scouting report right there scouting report anyone's game and also weird game from the nba tonight weird game expound on that giving maxi and mb like seven free throws for one play oh Oh, yeah. They made four free throws and made two of them.
Yes, weird. Have you ever seen that before? They made four.
They made all four. In your life of watching basketball, have you ever seen two free throws made by one player and then taken off the board a minute later and be like, eh, you know what? I want you to make those two again.
You know what?

What the fuck was that?

He just had to move. What was that?

The goaltending call in the first half was one of the most egregious things I've ever seen.

What was that?

What is that phantom goaltend?

And the overturned foul is obvious.

Every 50-50 call they were getting.

It was a weird, weird, weird officiated game. Let the record show.
95-88, not 95-86. I'll give you those two points.
Adam Silver post. Oh, fuck.
What's the stat? Big guy, help me out. The stat hole sent us a stat, and I gave it to Max knowing that he's just like, it's a ticking time bomb for numbers in his head.
So I gave him the stat. I'm not going to help you.
You got to figure out this stat on your own. It's a lot of numbers.
Basically, since Adam Silver's taken over the lead. See, Hank, I'm being just as mean to Max.
I gave him a stat. I didn't give him any guidance.
I just said, here's a chart. You figure it out.
And this is where we're at. Since Adam Silver has taken over the league, the team— Can't you read it? The better-seeded teams going on the road in game six are twice as likely to win.
So the better team is more likely to win? I don't know, dude. I'm not helping you.
No, did I say that right? Read it yourself. The wording is weird.
It's weird. Hold on.
I'll cut this. No, don't cut any of this.
Hank is on to something here. The better teams are favored.
No. Because they're better teams.
Because before silver, they were half as likely to win. And then after silver, they were twice as likely to win.
If that makes sense. Does that make sense? Is it because they changed it from 2-3-2? Was that a thing? No.
Okay. So when you have this specific situation.
Wait, no, I got the exact thing. Okay, go ahead.
Since Adam Silver took over, teams in the Celtics position have won twice as much as before Silver took over. So the higher seed on the road in Game 6 are twice as likely to win.
Basically trying to force Game 7. Since Silver has taken over, there's been twice as many Game 7s in that situation.
Happened last year against the Bucs. Tatum dominated that game.
He didn't dominate this game, but he took over when he had to. And then Game 7 was...
Harden sucked. He did.
He did. And Max, you know what I'm saying? When he gets to that level where he just starts driving and looking for fouls instead of looking for shots.
It's infuriating. I mean, he was just tripping over his feet and then just crying.
I do a lot of crying as well, but I'm man enough to admit it. You want me to just take my headphones off? You want me to take my headphones off?

Is this a better way to react today? Yeah, you can.

I'm right here, so you can still hear me.

He's right about that.

I'm just really excited for the next game.

I really believe in my team.

This is how you sounded.

And I was right.

Yeah.

It was a good game.

Not happy, but it went how it went. Now you got to go poop.
No. Oh, I'm here.
I just I wish that there was a way that both Hank and Max could lose. I know.
That's really what I know. It's like this series has delivered everything we've wanted.
It's just I don't want to see either one of them happy. They're both so much better for the show when they're grumpy I know and it's just flip flopped so fast and man that game and also can we just say was a terrible game overall it was like a tournament game it was just like guys missing shots wide open shots turnovers left and right it was like watching the NCAA tournament which I love but you know when people come after the NCAA tournament, that's what we just watched tonight.
Yeah, and I will go back and say that there was one play that Harden made that made me want to throw my remote at the television, which was when he took it to the hole, smart, just play defense on him. And Harden pushed off with his forearm like he does.
Then Harden falls on his ass and then looks over at the ref

and just sits down for like five seconds crying begging for a call yeah that made me that made me

want to assault James Harden yes yes um okay should we talk some other games uh Lakers Warriors game

six tonight late uh Warriors in game five I did give out the game of the month on the show but

it's so funny watching the Warriors and you can basically tell if they're gonna win by how fast

Thank you. in game five.
I did give out the game of the month on the show, but it's so funny watching the Warriors and you can basically tell if they're going to win by how fast Draymond sprints back on defense, like off dead balls and stuff. That energy he had, he was scoring.
He actually had the rare heat check layup where he got his shit stuffed. But it was what I expected from the Warriors and the fact that they're a championship team uh you know that knows that like hey 3-1 doesn't mean the series is over they still got a long hill to climb here but that was that was at least a good answer from the defending champs yeah when steph curry is is making shots and just being unbelievable stuff then they're just tough to beat in general like they don't even need as long as clay has a serviceable game if steph's playing like that in the fourth quarter yeah and it's close um then they're they're just always going to be extremely tough to beat in that situation i'm i'm happy that we get to see more of the series like it's been the opposite of the six or celtic series in a lot of ways where i'm i'm excited to watch every single game because every single game has delivered yeah and and uh the claylay Thompson, like he's been bad.
He's been very bad. They need him to do something special in game six.
They need like game six thunder. Klay Thompson, when he hit 11 threes, because he's been very, very bad.
And you're basically making like everyone else on the floor have to do that much more. I mean, Draymond Green scored 20 points.
You can't expect him to score 20 points in game six. Andrew Wiggins had 25.
So they need either a combo – they need either Clay or Jordan Poole to just like have one of those stretches where they go nuclear and hit like four out of five threes in a quarter or something like that, I think, to win this game. As a Nuggets fan, I do not want to play the Lakers.
I would rather play the, I would rather play the Warriors. I think that their game matches up better against them.
The Lakers scare me a little bit on defense and I mean, Anthony Davis, uh, I, we said he was the healthiest that he's ever been maybe in his life. And then he got wheelchaired off the court.
We probably should have seen one game like that coming, but I think he's going to be playing next game. Right.
They said, they said probable. And He said that he's ever been maybe in his life and then he got wheelchaired off the court we probably should have seen one game like that coming but i think he's going to be playing next game right they said they said probable and he said that he feels great might have been a concussion but i think he's back now i think he's back to being healthy again super healthy yeah he went off in a wheelchair which was one of those uh i like got when the warriors finally put the lakers away because it was actually kind of weird that they weren't able it was like hovering from nine to 13 points for that last six or seven minutes stretch before they got to total garbage time and you're like all right Warriors need to just put them away and they weren't able to fully like put them away where everyone sat so I when they finally did that I got into bed and I was like watching the game on my phone and then I refreshed Twitter and it's like Anthony Davis taken in a wheelchair uh to the locker room for a head injury and I was like what the fuck is this like a am I getting like is this is this a joke a prank because it's kind of a joke we'll always make like Anthony Davis gets injured 17 times a game he actually was was taken in a wheelchair.
He got hit in the temple.

But he seems like he's going to be okay.

It might have been a Paul Pierce situation.

Yeah. Maybe there was some doo-doo butt going on.

Yeah.

I don't know.

But I have a question for you guys.

Does Steph Curry and the Golden State Warriors,

do they officially erase the 3-1 meme

if they come back from 3-1 to beat LeBron?

Yes.

No.

I think so.

No.

No.

Yeah, because Warriors fans will always have that.

No.

They can always retort.

No.

Only if they win the title.

It's against LeBron.

Only if they win the title.

But it's against LeBron.

But it wasn't the title.

It wasn't the title.

It's got to be in the title.

If they win the title, if they overcome and beat the Lakers down 3- one, and then they go on to win the title, then it's completely erased. You're wrong.
It will be erased for like the next three days before the next series starts. And then it'll be back on until they win the title.
It'll be temporarily erased for a little bit. And, and golden state warriors fans will definitely act like it's erased.
Yeah. But then if they got blown out by the sons by the nuggets right in the next round then at that point okay yeah we can still say that it means nothing warriors blew 3-1 lead yep exactly got it exactly um okay uh nicks heat turns out hashtag your boy greeny was maybe right pft uh i think what else is new i think the i think the the temperature in game four uh in miami was like 90 degrees the temperature in game five in new york was like 65 degrees quentin grimes and jalen brunson played 48 minutes they had they had the ability to go because they didn't have the heat bothering them uh and that was an all-time jalen brunson like This is why he's become so quickly beloved by Knicks fans.
48 minutes, 38 points, nine rebounds, seven assists, balls on the line. This is my city.
This is my team. There's nothing better when that happens, when a guy does something like that.
And it just makes Mavericks fans even more sick watching that but credit to the Knicks for not like they could roll over and die there and they didn't and Jalen Brunson was the reason they didn't because he played his balls off for 48 minutes I'd like Jake to check what the weather is going to be like in Miami for the next game and that will influence my prediction if it's going to be above 84 degrees outside then i have the heat winning uh 7 p.m i'm looking at 87 degrees so the next might push it to 7 easy oh it's too hot all right p.m showers scattered scattered thunderstorms also still too hot i know high of 84 high of 84 Shout out julius randall for uh for like remind remembering that he's actually good at basketball like he yeah he i think maybe because he made all nba i think second team um he just woke up and was like wait i am i am a good basketball player i can do this and he came out and wasn't just a complete liability there's so many times when you watch him you're like this guy's just not good about how is he i guess he doesn't look like a good basketball player he is a good basketball player but a lot of times even when he's playing well you're like well this guy this guy doesn't really do anything particularly well right but it was it i really do think um he just needed the affirmation just to remind himself like, oh, yeah, you can play basketball at a pretty high level. You are a good player.
Go out and be a good player, and he was. And Mitchell Robinson making those free throws.
I always root for the big guy who has just the worst free throw look. Like his motion is terrible.
He misses them all the time. they did the hack hack of Mitchell Robinson towards the end where it was Jimmy Butler wasn't even like trying to I don't know if you saw this clip but Jimmy Butler was just smacking him in the butt it's like he was just smacking him in the butt over and over until the ref would call a foul yeah so but yeah he made his free throws i always like there's something nice about a big guy i'm sure he'll miss another big one like when it when it matters again but for one night he made his free throws you can always tell how bad somebody is at free throws by how hard they celebrate after making free throws yeah yeah right so like a big dude like that he acts like he just hit the-winning shot if he goes two for two at the line.
And the crowd gets really into it.

That's always a good moment, too.

Yes.

Hank, any other thoughts on any of the series?

No.

Okay.

Just focused.

Yeah, it's all about Sunday.

Okay.

All right.

All right.

I'm going to make.

I thought the people were freaking out about the eight seconds on the backcourt

at the end of that heat game.

Yes.

That was nonsense.

I was freaking out. You were? on the backcourt at the end of that heat game.
Yes. That was nonsense.
I was freaking out. That was a screen grab fest, though.
It was. Yeah, but people were saying it has to go to 15, which I didn't see anything official, so I could be wrong.
Yeah, it's one of those right on the border where it's not. Yeah.
I got a lot of don't know ball. Oh, interesting.
Jake, what does a Jake freakout look like?

What the heck?

Oh, wow. Yikes.

No, I was worse.

Sorry for everyone who had to listen to that.

I apologize.

Hanging around Max too much.

So Scott Foster wasn't on any of the games tonight,

which means he'll be calling one of the game sixes tomorrow.

So they're thinking it's going to be pushed.

The extender, yeah. Max, do you have the sheet? You want to tell us which games are going to go to game seven? I don't know.
Yeah. I can't do that again.
That stat could also just be a Scott Foster specific stat. Because Scott Foster has worked so many games under Adam Silver in game sixes because he is the NBA's hatchet man that he forces those games individually into game seven.
Yes. I feel like he's more likely to do the Warriors Lakers, right? Well, it depends on where he's been.
I don't know if they'll fly him across. Yeah.
But like the league would benefit more if. Yeah, of course.
Definitely. They want that very badly.
We need to track Scott Foster's jet. Yeah.
To figure out where it's going. Yeah, tail number.
I'm going to make the executive decision.

We are going to wait until after the Suns-Nuggets game.

I think the Nuggets are going to kill them.

They're up 20 right now.

I think we just talked about it right now.

21.

They're up 21.

I think we just did.

Nuggets in six.

We bury the Suns right now.

It's over.

Sun, you're done.

You're red dwarfs.

Your time's up. Chris Paul sucks.
paul blew the series for the suns by getting injured in game one uh good things for the nuggets i like it as long as the nuggets don't have to play against the lakers next round i love where the nugs are at we dominated tonight we won by 17 the nuggets won by 17 points tonight another and shut the fuck up Hank another triple double another triple double for Jokic on the night all the stars stepped up Porter's looking good Murray's looking good Gordon's looking good Jeff Green put in a couple baskets in the fourth quarter it's a complete team yeah I mean for the craziness that are these NBA playoffs and everything that's gone on the Nuggets have looked like the best team they you know first round they look like the best team this round they look like the best team they are it feels like they're peaking at the right time and uh it they just kind of get forgotten in the mix but they are playing very very good basketball and what they're doing again there's eight minutes left in the So if you're listening to this and the Suns won, that will just be the dumbest segment we ever did on Pardon My Take. But we believe in the Nuggets, and they know that they're not going to go to a Game 7.
They're going to come out and take care of business, and they're up 21. They're going to win by 31.
Nugs in six. And I think it's time that we had a conversation about Kevin Durant's legacy, Big Cat.
It's been too long since we've discussed that. I think it's been at least 11 months since we've had that conversation.
Kevin Durant's legacy has taken a hit the last few years. Yeah.
Maybe an irreparable hit because you would think if he's the best player in the NBA, like some people have said that he is, you think he'd be able to get it done with a team with Devin Booker and some nice role players on the side. And Kevin Durant, unless you come on the podcast to discuss this, your legacy right now, I'd say it's almost completely destroyed.
Yeah, I'd agree. What do you say, Billy? Is Kevin Durant still a baby back bitch? I think we retired that because he stopped tweeting from a burner, which we respected that when he just started going, just going after people with his main account.
But he – I'll say this. I think the Suns next year might be, you know, a very good team.
But whenever you trade for a guy in the middle of the season, Chris Paul, you got to figure out what you're going to do with the point guard because he clearly can't. We know Chris Paul's old now.
It is what it is. He's going to get injured in the playoffs, and you have Kevin Durant and Devin Booker for, I think, three or four years locked up.
They should just be building around just those two guys. Forget DeAndre Ayton.
Forget Chris Paul.

Build around those two guys.

Get as many good role players around them,

and the Suns will still have a title window.

Yeah, maybe.

Kevin Durant needs to do something.

I'm just putting on my Skip Bayless shoes.

Kevin Durant needs to prove to me that he's as good as we've been told

that Kevin Durant is by ourselves.

By ourselves.

Okay, so congrats to the Nugs. This would really suck if we jinxed this.
Not going to happen. Not going to happen.
Not going to happen. This is a must win for the Nuggets.
Yeah, it is. Well, you know, we'll update it after our NFL schedule draft, so we'll update it.
It'll probably be halftime when we finish this, and then we can fully assess. Other, let's see, other things that we can talk about.
talk about oh before we talk hockey playoffs i just want to say a special shout out to bo jackson he's had hiccups for an entire year uh i'd kill myself if i had hiccups for more than 15 minutes so i don't know how he is surviving listen i've got a hundred percent foolproof cure for the hiccups bo if you want them i'll give them to you i will cure your hiccups within 10 minutes i that's a guarantee i know how to cure the hiccups it's a it's a method and it works every time yeah so reach out to me maybe maybe give me like a handcrafted bow and arrow that you made or just let me hang out with you for a day because chilling with bo jackson would be the absolute best i will cure bo jackson's hiccups he his hiccups are so bad that he sniffed a porcupine's butt yep to try to cure him somebody told him if you just take a big whiff of a porcupine's asshole your hiccups will go away and he believed them and tried it didn't work bo i i smelled probably twice as good as a porcupine's asshole just hang out with me and let me fix them for you it also just is a testament to how big of a badass bo jackson is because now his broken hip uh leg injury that you know took took away his nfl career is the second worst injury he's ever had because i would absolutely say if you said hey you can break your hip or you can have hiccups for a year i'd take the broken hip all day every day because at least you know like this is how i can rehab and i know that there's an end in sight the hiccups there's no end in sight and then the other thing is this just means bo jackson is incapable of being scared no one has scared him in an entire year to get rid of these hiccups he can't be scared i was about to bring up that point because that's that's the cure people tell you about yeah just like have somebody jump out behind you but he's he's unscarable because he's such a tough guy right but straight up like i don't know what's the longest you guys have had hiccups for maybe like drunk maybe a half hour an hour yeah i had hiccups for like close to an hour two hours the other weekend and my buddy choked me out and it made it go away oh that's why your buddy choked you out well we were wrestling oh okay nice they were doing they're doing jujitsu yeah yeah yeah uh you guys ever get scared what do you mean that's how you get rid of the hiccup that's what we were just saying yeah wow jake with bo jackson yeah i was looking at nfl schedule that's okay that's a me move yeah that was that was a billy move yeah i was billy marsh right there yep my bad seriously how much you think bo would pay to get rid of his hiccups right now endless amount of money i'm not exaggerating when i say that if i had hiccups for for i think the longest probably 30 minutes drunk but like anything over a day or two and it's just shoot me like a horse yeah which i probably shouldn't say that say. It's probably too soon after what happened at the Kentucky Derby.

But it's true.

Get the curtain.

Let me lay down.

Shoot me dead.

I don't want to have the hiccups anymore in my life.

We should get Bo on the podcast.

Come on the podcast and we will cure your hiccups live on part of my take.

I guarantee it.

Yeah.

We'll scare the fuck out of you.

Okay.

Hockey.

Leafs are still alive.

H-words advance to the conference finals.

What else we got?

Oh, and the Edmonton night series is awesome.

Oh, and Spencer Hawes went to a cracking game.

We made him go to a cracking game.

He went to a cracking game.

They got absolutely shit pumped.

He left early.

He was texting us in the third being like, can I leave because they were down like four goals

so

I'll say this and hockey

fans might not love this

this round of the playoffs haven't been that great

first round was great this round of the playoffs

have not been that great

I watched some of the Leafs game the other night

I did not watch the Kraken game I have not watched

the H words play recently

so I could try to talk about it

but all I'm going to say is just that

watch out because Biz might be right

Thank you. night i did not watch the cracking game i have not watched the h words play recently um so i i could try to talk about it but all i'm going to say is just that watch out because biz might be right this might be right about the leafs don't let them get hot oh yeah i'm pretty much just laser focused on the oilers and how much fun they are to watch um and they had a nice answer to the to the like they got their ass kicked in game three but yeah i i don't know maybe get to the get to the next round because these memes, is that fair to say? You're a big hockey fan.
This round has not been the best. It has not been the best.
Yeah. Just a lot of blowouts.
It's okay to admit it because, you know, we get to this time of year and there's a lot of, like, this sport's better than this sport. Let's just be – let's have an honest conversation.
The NBA playoffs this round have been a lot better than the hockey playoffs this round i saw a stat and i'm gonna butcher it but it was something like this year there's been a record number of games that have reached the score of four to one at some point during the game whoa which makes sense like i feel like every time i look up it's four to one somebody yeah uh okay let's do some nfl schedule talk before we do that top golf it's golf it's not golf it's top golf we got a bunch of stuff that makes top golf top golf clubs balls tees turf even a ball picker upper cart thing they also have a whole bunch of stuff on their menu and loud music giant targets giant tvs and handcrafted food beverage menu. They even have a whole day each week dedicated to more play for less pay.
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NFL schedule. It has been released.
It was leaked all day. There was like little crumbs that were given to us.
We started the day with the shocking news, and I'll say it's shocking news. The Lions and the Chiefs are kicking off the season.
Credit to the Lions. They have ridden the hype wave to the first game of the season.
That will be very fun to watch the Lions. We always talk about wanting something new, maybe in the college football playoffs.
The Lions on the opening kickoff night will be cool to see. The jerseys will be different.
Jared Goff, all of it. I want to see it.
It will be fun. Just watching the lions play at night is going to be a shock to my body yeah my body hasn't i can't remember the last time we've experienced i guess they've had a couple sprinkled here and there but like in a big game where everyone's eyes are on them uh i'm excited about the lions this year it does feel like they've reached that point where it's like maybe we should pump the brakes on them just because like being put in the opening game of the entire season feels like a big step up for them.
Like maybe, maybe we put them on like the first Monday night game. Maybe we, maybe we ease our way into there.
Now they're a really good roster. They're a good team.
They've got one of the best quarterbacks in the NFL, our personal friend, Jerry Goff and Dan Campbell is a fucking insane man. Who's a lot of fun to watch so i i understand why the league would do that plus with the hard knocks that they built in last year i get why they would think that they would be a bigger draw but i still don't think that the lions are at the point where they should be opening up the nfl season dumb debate time i think the lions losing in a close game opening night is better than winning.
It would be very Lions to have the best loss of the season. But it would be even more Lions to win the opening night against the Chiefs and then lose the next four games and have an entire week where it's like they just beat the Chiefs opening night, Super Bowl champs.
I think if you're a Lions fan deep down, a close loss wouldn't be the worst thing in the world. And then you come back and then you reel off five wins.
You go five and one to start. I agree with you.
Yeah. Dumb debate.
It's stupid. Obviously, you want to win the games rather than lose it, but this is a dumb show.
We have dumb brains. A close loss might be the perfect thing for the Lions the lions because if they won it means that they pulled out all the tricks and they have no more tricks right and it's just like they feel like oh shit all the hype that's really real and then that's when you start to get you know exposed they're gonna do every trick annie reed's also gonna have a lot of tricks there's gonna be i'm to say, over under four and a half gadget plays running this game, and I'll take the over on it.
Yeah. I just, Lions, you want, like, basically what you want is to lose at the buzzer on a field goal and have it be Patrick Mahomes.
And you can be like, you know what? We're a really good team. It's just Patrick Mahomes is the best quarterback in the NFL.
I think you're confusing, like, what would be in general as opposed to what would be the Lions idea of a great result. The Lions idea, over the last couple years, they've led the league in moral victories.
They had a New England Patriots undefeated season's worth of moral victories in the last two years. No, I know that obviously they want to win the game.
I'm just saying that... Hank, you okay you remember that season hank yeah no that's fine uh unnecessary it happened yeah it happened it's a sports podcast we talk about sports again this is a very dumb thought because i know you want to win the games but i'm just saying it wouldn't be the work because if they do beat the chiefs week one thursday night in front of the whole country country, the Lions hype will be out of this world.
It will be uncontrollable at that point. So just a stupid thought, food for thought, something to remind yourself if Lions fans, you do lose that game.
So when I was watching the schedule release get trickled out like Chinese water torture all day today where it's like, okay, one game will be released every hour hour on the hour pretty much I can't help but think that at some point Roger Goodell is going to do to the schedule release what he's done with the draft and just market

the shit out of it and like take it on the road each year and turn into like an hour long two

hour long primetime event where he just announces like one week's worth at a time he had like a

bracket release essentially yeah like he sees what the NCAA does and the ratings they get on that

Thank you. two hour long primetime event where he just announces like one week's worth at a time he like a bracket release essentially yeah like he sees what the ncaa does and the ratings they get on that i feel like in the next 10 years schedule release date is going to be the he's going to have kids troops come out on stage the whole nine yards we're gonna have people breaking it down week by week by week when he announces each week it's going to be like a massive fucking corporate mediat sensation it's going to be insane yeah that's my prediction for the future of the nfl uh i'm looking at the line schedule right now so they're going to lose the chiefs and then they're going to start the season five and one so that's it that's the perfect start for the lines right there well every fan out there went through the schedule when it came out of course you're not you're not a real if you have your team doing any worse than 10-7.
Every team is going to be 10-7 or better. Yeah.
Okay, do we want to do a quick draft of our favorite games? Okay. What should we do? Should we do three rounds? Should we do a three-round draft? Because we have all of us.
Max, are you going to participate in this draft? Sure. I haven't looked at a single thing in the NFL.
Okay, that actually makes it better. Hank, have you looked at a single thing? No, I just know opening night is Brady night against the Eagles.
Okay, so PFC, why don't you start and we'll go around the room. That's true.
I know. I'm sick of looking at your face while watching sports.
Max also went on a rant. I heard him at halftime.ime He's like I don't fucking care about the schedule

We know who we're playing

I don't care when they play

Who cares

I do think that who cares

You know who you're playing months ago

Why does it matter when you're playing them

It's fun to just fantasize about

It's fun to fantasize about

And Max when you're a loser

This matters a lot

Yeah that's true

But you also expect to fantasize about. And, Max, when you're a loser, this matters a lot.
I'm a loser.

Yeah, that's true.

That's also true.

Yeah, that is.

But you also expect to win.

Yeah.

Dude, I'm itching to pick this first game.

Okay.

All right.

Go ahead, PFT.

Start.

Okay.

So I get the first overall pick?

Yeah, you get the first pick, and I don't know if you heard Billy,

but he just kind of whispered, I'm itching to pick this first game.

I actually have one I'm really excited about.

Okay.

Yeah. Yeah.
I mean, let's go me, and then you want to go big cat? You, Hank, and then me, and then we'll go around the room. Okay.
All right. So Billy will be like one of the last ones.
He'll be fourth. Okay.
So somebody will definitely pick his game then. For the first overall pick in the 2023 schedule NFL draft, I'm going to go with the Buffalo Bills at the New York Jets.
Dropped. September 11.
What the fuck? Oh, no, wait. Was that Billy's? Dude, that's the best game.
I didn't know. I had no idea that that was going to be Billy's.
Fucking best game. How could you do that, bro? I didn't know.
Billy, if I knew it was yours, I wouldn't have done it. I'm sorry.
Monday night football. You don't even care about that game.
September 11th in New York. Aaron Rodgers, renowned 9-11 truther.
Going to be waking up America. He'll probably have a fun message written on a headband or some weird touchdown celebration, waking people up to the truth.
And then, of course, allen pressing all the buttons going up against a good jets defense that's going to be a great game great i mean i go back i really wish that we were staying in new york for that one because i would love to go to that game yeah great pick great pick thanks thanks that was mine it was so what's your first pick tom brady night uh i will go with the Jets versus the Patriots Week 18, probably taking Rodgers out of the playoffs, and what's going to be a long and frustrating season disappointment for Jets fans. Okay.
Dude, we're going to know by then. Because I don't think the Patriots are going to be in playoff contention, but they might be able just to tank our season by beating us.
But also, if we can't go, you can't go. Right.
That's why it's my number one pick. No, but you don't want to.
If they can't go, you can't go. Right.
Right. But I don't think they're going to have any playoff chances.
Right. You see what's already happened you just like envision a world where you're not

going i know but like we could be borderline it really just depends on that first game that's why i'm way more excited about the first no no that's pft's game so you can't talk about that game oh fuck all right well you know we'll do we'll just do a snake draft we'll do two picks each because this is the most boring thing ever uh that's uh we're gonna pull francesa yeah yeah It's because they're picking games they don't care about.

Yeah.

Okay.

I'll go.

I'll go. My first pick, I will go.
Let's see. Where did it go? Oh, here we go.
Bills at Bengals. Damar Hamlin.
Week 9, Sunday Night Football. The game that we debated for a week and a half who was going to win that game that will be a very highly anticipated game week nine both teams should be very good what he's got an intrusive thought what was your intrusive thought you know how Hank and Max would both lose Sunday yeah if they couldn't finish the game and couldn't play it oh so you're wishing for someone to.
That was an intrusive thought. It was.
I said it. That was an intrusive thought.
It doesn't count. He said it was an intrusive thought.
That's what Billy is. That was a brain worm.
I was like, why? Billy is the intrusive thought of this podcast. Yes, he really is.
All right, so that's my pick. Go ahead, Billy.
I'm going Black Friday, Jets, Dolphins. Okay.
Well, it's going to be good. I actually – I guess.
It's going to be force-fed football. You're going to watch.
It's good that football is on TV, but I don't know if that game – I wouldn't take that second overall. No, that's going to be a crucial game.
It's also – Bad value. I'm very much into the NFL just taking over every holiday.
Black Friday is college football. That's stupid.
That's Nebraska-Iowa. Like, that's – I don't know what – they didn't have to do that day.
We had football on TV that day. We didn't need that day.
I'm down for, you know, the Christmas Eve, the New Year's Eve, the Christmas Day, all these other things. But we had football on that day already.
That was already a designated football day. They should have done it, like, on the Tuesday after Thanksgiving.
Yeah, but you're going to love it when it's on. No, of course, but I am going to watch college football, too.
Okay, Jake, your first pick. So.
This is wild. What? That we're doing this.
Yeah, no, it's really dumb. It's terrible.
We're only doing two rounds. Yeah.
We should do one round. We should do...
Everyone gets one game. Okay.
So this year, New Year's Eve is on a Sunday. We get an entire slate on New Year's Eve.
This is making it worse, Jake. I'm just setting the stage.
How excited you are about this draft. Yes, because I'm taking Bengals at Chiefs 425 New Year's Eve.
You watch the game, then you do your New Year's Eve plans. Okay.
Also, I'm sorry for earlier. What? He said the heck.
Oh, no, no, no. No.
When he when he the Bo Jackson when I was looking at my favorite games, I really feel awful. You feel awful.
Yeah. No tap.
Okay. All right.
Give me that Max. Yeah, I still don't know what Jake's talking about.
I feel high right now. Dude, I'm getting weird thoughts.
I feel great. Good vibes are in the air.
All apart right now. Good vibes are in the air.
This is what makes true AWLs. Listening to this and being like, wait, what? What are they doing? Billy wants to want to die.
By the way, the Nuggets are now up 32, so great call by us. Great call by us.
I would say Super Bowl rematch, Monday Night Football, Chiefs-Eagles, November 20th, but I'm sick of everyone on the Niners saying that they would have beat us if they had a quarterback so it's at home December 3rd

425 against the Niners

okay alright and that concludes our draft

Willie

you can just say a game you're

looking forward to but that concludes our draft

week 5 Chicago at Washington

yeah there's a rematch

might have to go to that

also there's a Peacock exclusive game

this year

when is that?

I think Chargers Bills

Thank you. Rematch.
Might have to go to that. Rematch.
Also, there's a Peetock exclusive game this year. Oh, yeah.
Yeah. When is that? It's, I think, Chargers-Bills, I think December.
This is the, yeah. Pats are going to Germany.
That's the other one of note for the Pats. Oh, yeah.
The Tyreek Hill revenge game is in Germany as well. Oh, okay.
It's Pats-Colts in Germany. Yeah.
I feel like Belichick will have them on some type of history tour. Oh, yeah.
That'll be fun. By the way, shout out to Titans social media.
That was by far the best video. They interviewed drunk people on Broadway in Nashville and had them guess the logos of the teams, and it was just perfectly done.
Because it's hard to one one up every year all these schedule releases because it's been a trendy thing for the team social media accounts but the titans nailed it yeah the people on broadway one person guessed the chargers logo as being lightning mcqueen yeah as being that team there are two bachelorette parties that guessed the uh the indianapolis colts logo as being the dallas cow That was awesome. And they confidently were like, Cowboys nailed it.
It's the Cowboys. And then the Texan Texans was another good one.
And the Atlanta Florida Dolphins. Yeah.
Shout out to the Jaguars social media team, too. They did the head script writer for the Jacksonville Jaguars narrated theirs.
Oh, I thought that was good. Okay.
This has been the dumbest 15 minutes. Confidently can say the dumbest 15 minutes in this show, at least in the last year.
We have the rest of the show. We have Kenny Smith.
We have Firefest. And we were correct.
The Denver Nuggets are up 30 on the Suns going into halftime. So great show.
And let's kick it to ourselves with Kenny Smith. This interview with Kenny Smith is brought to you by Burt Kreischer and his new movie, The Machine, on Sony Pictures.
You know Burt. He's been on part of my take many times.
He was with us at the Super Bowl. We did his show.
You're familiar with him. You love The Machine.
And Sony is giving us a new must-see movie to kick off Summer starring Bert himself. It's based on the outrageous, truish story of Bert Kreischer that blew up the internet.
The movie picks up 23 years after the iconic story from Bert's signature set, his true experience with Russian mobsters while on a booze-soaked college trip. That trip from college has come back to haunt Bert as he and his estranged father, played by the legendary Mark Hamill, are kidnapped back to Russia by the mob to atone for something they say that he did.
Together, Bert and his father must retrace the steps of his younger self, played by the hilarious Jimmy Tatro, another recurring guest of Part of My Take. In the midst of a war within a sociopathic crime family, all while attempting to find common ground in their often fraught relationship,urt Kreischer, Jimmy Tatro.
Burt Kreischer is the man, the myth, the machine. Get your tickets now.
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Rated R. It's going to be very funny.
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And now here's Kenny Smith. Okay, we now welcome on a very special guest, recurring guest.
It is the man, the myth, the legend, Kenny the Jets Smith. He has a book out called Talk of Champions, Stories of the People Who Made Me.
Go check it out now. You can buy it everywhere.
I'm holding it up for people who are watching on YouTube, a memoir, awesome pictures on the back, young Kenny, the jet. All right.
So thank you for coming. First of all, your book, let's start with your book and then we'll talk a little NBA.
Okay. What's going on, you know, in the playoffs.
So your book has a lot of stories about all the people who've impacted you in your life. And I guess this is probably a question you're going to get a lot, but I have to know what the best piece of advice that Charles Barkley gave you because he seems like – he seems actually like he would give good advice if you asked him for it.
No, not necessarily. Okay, all right.
I was wrong. Yeah, I was trying to give Charles a compliment.
No, yeah, I think the one thing that, you know, I read a lot of self-help books. I do, you know, oh, such and such for dummies and whatever it might be.
And it always would seem like it was from one person's point of view. And this is 15 people that I observed that influenced me.
So it's 15 point of view as a self-help. So I feel hopefully when you read it, people feel better about themselves and understand, oh, Bill Russell did that.
Oh, Magic Johnson operated. Oh, Shaq.
You know, Michael Jordan works that way. Now that's why it worked for me.
So I think that's it. But the best advice, I'd say from Chuck, the part that is influential is he gave me a voice where before him, people would just ask me basketball questions.
I never would talk about politics, never talk about culture. They'd be like, Knicks win? You think the Knicks are going to win? You keep it moving.
But now I go places and his voice, you know, he's like in terms of not in terms of the person, but the voice like he started like Muhammad Ali would not be just asked boxing questions. Right, more than an athlete.
Yeah, and so he is that. That's the reason why LeBron and those guys today he's the the bridge for that for lebron and chris paul and and camelo was you know to do yeah sometimes he says things that are sneaky profound and other times i saw this the other day where he was on the steam room and he was talking about losing his soap in a hotel oh yeah did you see what what is that about what what was he saying with that clip where he was like i have to bring my own soap on the road because one time i almost lost a big butt how about that so now use your imagination with the little hotels yeah so yeah i mean he could give you that or he could give you something political but the one thing that you know even when i was writing it I realized where how I view people came from my parents in this way my mom I can hear it even now can he listen be a listener listen because you know and this is the day and age especially even with all the podcasts and things that we do I want to be heard I want to listen to what I'm saying but listening gives you even when you might not have sympathy.
And so being empathetic of, oh, that's why he acts that way, allowed me to have these people in my life, which when I was writing it, I wrote, I was about maybe the fourth chapter. I was sending it in to the editor.
He goes, you realize like everybody you're sending in has a book written about their life? I was like, man, I have access to that and didn't think about how I have the access to do that and talk to these people, which I think if I knew all this at 20, jeez, oh my God. I'd own this station, man.
We'd be all in this station. I'd own five teams.
As far as the different people that you talked to for this book, what's one example of one person that said something really profound that you had never thought about before you got the chance to read what they had to say? It's more echoes. You hear echoes in the back and you don't realize it in the back of your head.
When the whole George Floyd thing was going on, I walked off the set, and I was like, I think I shouldn't be here today. And I was like, so that's how the book actually came about.
A literary agent called me and she was like, you have a book. I'm like, what do you mean? She's like, why'd you walk off? I was like, well, it's really like the people who made me.
And I was like, oh, through sport, through culture, through politics, whatever. So that also went back to Bill Russell and Dean Smith.
Bill Russell was my first coach. He drafted me in the NBA.
Imagine that. Right.
We'll get to that. And then Dean Smith.
It was like my first week in school. He brought me in, and he's like, brought me in the office.
And he's like, how many jump ropes you're going to do? I'm thinking, and we lift weights asked me he said Kenny as an African American student what are you gonna do here for the students here I was like whoa like that was the first time someone who wasn't African American asked me what am I gonna do for black people like what like that just blew my mind. It's a big question for an 18 year old.
And so hey and that was during the time of apartheid Mandela, we had shanties on campus and so like that might have been echoing my head when I walked off Bill Russell you know it's got funny stories because he threw us out of practice one day because he fell asleep but that's another story but he one where he's sitting, he has all these notes on the plane. Because his rule was I had to sit next to him every plane ride and every bus ride.
And I would drive home with him because we lived a mile away. So I spent a lot of time with him then.
So now he's looking at these notes and it's got like Yugoslavia, Spain players. So I go, Coach, you're telling me there's not a guy in Alabama that you could just drive and go see just as good? And he says, Kenny, as an African-American, you can never not want inclusion.
I'm like, so he's taking a joking moment. So all those echoes are in your body and in your ear that you don't know know like why you do things and i'm like now i started to understand where i'm getting these that information and compelled to do things you know in sport in business in life yeah i think a lot of people lack empathy until they go through a moment that makes them realize oh yeah that this is what other people experience you know what it is too what? What happened with Shaq? Yeah.
Because Shaq has a military background. Like if you know his dad, his big military, we know that story.
And he's a police officer. Shaq actually, he has a real badge.
He has the sirens and lights and everything. So he has a reverence to military and police office because he was going in the wrong direction and they straightened him up, get up at 6, make your bed,

but whatever it might be.

I grew up in Queens, New York.

We don't look at it.

We respect law enforcement, but we don't look at it the same way.

Different experience, yeah.

So when he makes a comment during a cultural, social, economic moment,

I have to be empathetic that they made him the billionaire that he is. Yeah, right.
You know, that lifestyle. So he has a reverence.
And if I don't, even though I might not agree, or Charles from Alabama, I might not agree. If I don't understand why, then what are we doing? And that's what I think gets lost a lot, even in sport and in life.

It sounds like in writing this book,

it was probably pretty therapeutic to look back and be like,

look at all these people that I've been able to be friends with,

to mentor,

to be mentee.

Like,

was that,

did you have that moment?

You're like,

wow.

I thought it was normal.

Right.

Like,

like you guys could just call Shaq or you guys could call magic Johnson. I didn't think that that was special.
Like until I realized like, no, he's the highest of the high in his profession, financially, culturally, and in his, like what? Like there's 15 and I got 15 more that just didn't make the book.

Like I had to,

I realized that I've been blessed

with the ability

to see around corners too.

Like I met guys

and ladies

early in their careers

and I go,

no, they're going to make it.

Now I might have mentored

and some I haven't,

no, nothing.

But I go, no, that's it.

He's the one.

Like I was on a plane

with Michael B. Jordan

and I wrote about this.

I'm going to,

and it's like five or six guys like this. I was on a plane with him.
He had not acted yet. He just happened to be sitting next to me.
I'm talking to him. I give him my number.
Calls me up. Six months later, he's like, hey, Kenny, remember me? Michael B.
I'm like, yeah, I mean Michael Jordan. Yeah, right.
Yeah, I remember you, bro. How are you? He's like, I'm moving to LA and I'm gonna go through this for this acting thing.
He's like, I might need a meal or two, so if I get stuck out here I'm gonna come. And I said to him, bro, you'll never need a meal from me.
You're it. That's really cool.
Because you see it. It's a quality that when I watch a guy on TV and play, I'm like, he's going to be the MVP of the league.
I remember I said that about Durant. It's something about it that you see that they have.
You probably also said that about Lonnie Walker, right? Like LeBron. He's like, I knew.
I knew the second. That's Cap.
It's funny that you guys caught up, picked up on that, because the first thing we were like, so LeBron has to take credit for the fact that he knew. Be ready.
I was like, is he back there telling, you know, Pippen's son, be ready, bro. Yeah.
You never know. He said that to Tristan Thompson yet.
Yeah. It's what makes it so funny about LeBron because he's so – he's without a doubt one of the top two basketball players of all time, but he also has these goofy moments where he says something and we can all like laugh at him in the same moment.
Yeah. I read that book.
Yeah. That book.
Oh, you should get LeBron to read the first page of your book. Yeah.
Oh, yeah. Yeah.
What's on the first page? What was LeBron pick up? Also, it's not without a doubt because Kenny didn't have LeBron in his top 10 a few years ago. At that time, I did not.
Yeah. When we had you on last time.
It was close. Has he made it there yet? Yeah, he's in the top 10 now.
Has Steph – I mean, Steph, is he there? It's hard because every time you add someone, you got to take someone out. Well, I just say, you know, again, we went through the 10.
And I'm going off the top of my head because I'm probably going to leave someone out when you go off the top of your head and not have a list in front of you. But these guys will never – I don't think Michael could ever be removed.
I don't think Kareem could ever be removed. I don't think Magic and I don't think Bird could ever be removed because it's kind of like if I watch someone play the piano and they're the first pianist, you gave me the blueprint on how to play the piano.
But if it's never been played before and you figure out how to make music, like there's something special about that more than anything else. So those guys kind of put it.
Will Chamberlain is on that. So now we got five that can't be removed.
Right. So there's only five that can jump into your top ten.
So at that time, I still had Oscar Robertson, Mr. Triple Double, you know.
And so, like, no, Shaq.

Right around there, Tim Duncan.

Like, where are we?

Yeah.

No, it's hard.

It gets very difficult.

Where are we?

And so for Steph, you know, LeBron is obviously,

the generational part about him is the longevity of it.

Right.

You know, there are people who have had just as good years as him,

but no one's had just as good of careers.

You know, it's not the ordinary, it's the extra, which makes you extraordinary. You know, it makes you extraordinary.
It's not the, you're doing ordinary things all the time that you can consistently do them where I can't even, like I can't run and jump the way I used to. So it's not, you can't consistently do it.
But, look, Steph, I just don't think that, like, I always

say Steph is going to, he's culturally

in the top 10 here because

of the way the game is played. You don't have to

defend to affect the game

the same way. So those guys

also, like Michael,

Kareem, they affected

the game defensively.

That changes

the way you play.

So that's why

I think that's why I move Michael here. Right.
So speaking of him, I assume he's in your book. Yes.
The Jordan chapter. Yeah.
Can you give us an anecdote or a lesson that he gave you that you didn't even know at the time? You look back and you're like, oh, yeah, how he was doing it, I started mimicking something after him. I think I open up with saying, when you read it, it's going to be I've always been jealous of Scottie Pippen.
That's how I opened up. Because he was the fifth pick, I was the sixth, and then he got traded to Chicago.
Right. And I was like, that could be me.
Because I'm playing with Michael and being a New Yorker. Like, we have a bravado about us that we like someone who pushes us in our face.
Those guys always propelled me. So, like, being a good player is also knowing what you don't have.
And, like, sometimes I need that, like, that guy to be in your face and, like, get you motivated. And so I used to watch it when he was a bull, and I used to be like, Scott, he doesn't realize he's going to be great.
Because I don't think Scott even made the all-rookie team first team as rookie team with us. So, like, imagine that.
now he's a top 50 player of all time right because a guy pushes you that's next to you is also part of your journey and I knew what that was by being at I was like ah man let me get that like let me get that with like passion like as a New Yorker we have that always around us like the melting pot of people.

Like I'm around Italian people who just love their culture.

I'm around, you know, devout Jewish people

who like passionate about their religion,

Muslims, like everyone.

So when someone's like, Mike is that.

He's a New Yorker, don't know it.

Like he's just like, he's in your face about it,

how he is.

And I was like, I'm jealous.

Yeah.

So I took away from Michael the ability

the Yorker don't know it like he's just like he's in your face about how he is and I was like I'm jealous yeah so I I took away from Michael the the the uh ability to push yourself like how do you push yourself at times and I still didn't have enough of it because I would have had him to help me so I'm always jealous of Scottie Pippen man I hate you Scottie it Scottie. It is one of those things, whether it be basketball or work or life.

If the most talented person is also the hardest worker,

it's hard not to fall in line.

It's hard not to be like, well, that guy, he could get by with just doing it,

but he's also putting in more hours than everyone.

But see, the fact is, I don't even know if he was putting in more hours,

but there's a bravado while you're putting the hours in. You know what I mean? It's almost kind of like doing something that you really don't want to do sometime in the moment, but still doing it like you love it.
Right, yeah. And that is hard to do some days.
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But I like that Billy said, sometimes I secretly eat it slow because he knows that we'd all question his masculinity if he didn't get all 12 inches in his mouth. Is that dude eating a cheesesteak slow? Yo, what's up with Billy? He's eating rabbit yeah billy billy does your husband also order cheesesteaks order now at part of my cheesesteak dot com also available on uber eats grubhub and doordash and now back to kenny smith are you a little bit mad at michael jordan for taking those years off because people always say like those rockets teams um you guys won your championships those people where they're at at? I'm not saying me.
Are they in this room? Many people are saying if Jordan was playing on the Bulls they would not have won eight in a row. You saw the documentary first of all.
I would be mad if I were you because I would be like yeah we would have beaten Michael Jordan. No I always say that.
I'm not mad. We got ours.
Like that was his fault. With an asterisk.
There's no asterisk. When he was back and he had 55 points at the guard and y'all were like, he's back.
Michael's back and he's the greatest of ever. What do you mean by you guys were like? If you were in wherever you were and when Michael came back, you were screaming that he's back when he hits the guard and flew in the middle and he had 55, the double nickel, then he loses to Orlando.
But we swept them. Well, Nick Anderson couldn't hit a free throw.
No, but we swept them. That would have been one.
We swept them. They didn't win a game.
You walked them. Shaq and Penny didn't win a game against us in the finals.
The two guys who made first team All-NBA did not win a game against us. So you would have extra swept the Bulls.
My point is this, and this is where it comes from, this confidence. Horace Grant was in Orlando.
Yep. We saw in the documentary there was dissension, so he left.
They were too small. Yeah.
It wasn't Michael wasn't great when they lost to Orlando. They were too small.
They didn't have a grant to contend with Grant or they killed him on the board Shaq. We had Dream.
He was Shaq on steroids then. So they were too small.
There was no Dennis Rodman. Right.
That's two years later. So they would have been a small team trying to defend Dream and us.
Yeah. We would have beat them.
Now, if you ask me the same question and go, can you beat that first three-peat team or the second three, I don't know. I'd be scratching my head.
But those teams, how they were constructed and just add Mike to it, we would have beat them for sure. Swept? We would have beat them.
I don't know how I swept, but we would have beat them.

Okay, so I mean, I loved watching Hakeem play. It was...

His footwork was insane.

Like, just everything about him.

Like, the fact that he was so tall and such a big man

and he looked like he was

ballet out there.

Who was the best player you ever played with?

And maybe we'll count, not count

college. You can't say MJ.
There's an Hakeem chapter. There's a Michael chapter.
I play with both. I play with Akeem Olajuwon and Michael Jordan.
I know. It's pretty crazy.
It's ridiculous. Yeah.
And spent many moments with all of them. So I think Michael is going to be the best player.
Yeah, not counting college. So just NBA.
Akeem, easily. Yeah.
Not even close.

He was Michael in those two-year runs.

When I say he was Michael, he invoked fear into the opponent

when you weren't the position he was guarding.

That's fear.

So does Steph Curry make Anthony Davis fearful I think yes I think yes I don't know I think yes I would say yes because of what he's going to do on the court I can't do what I do the way that he has to play defense you think Anthony Davis feels that he can't play well with Steph Curry? No, no, but I think Steph Curry passes the test, and it's talking about the all-time greats, and LeBron's in there, and there's some guys who might be getting there right now. But Steph specifically, you have to know where he is at all times.
The whole team does. Team defense, because he – No, when you have the ball When you have the ball, maybe not.
So yeah, maybe that's okay. But defensively, I think that all five guys are fearful of where Steph is and making sure they know where he is at all times.
Do you think Patrick Ewing, when he caught the ball on the right block, was like, where the hell's Michael? Well, he traveled a lot.

He's like, where's Michael?

Yeah.

No, he's like, I'm going to travel and they won't call him.

And he's like, and how many times did you see the block?

No, I know.

I mean, the.

That's the difference.

And Hakeem, you had to know where he was.

No, you're right.

Because the MJ, the final shot, the play before.

On offense, Andy.

The play before is stripping Carl Malone. If you don't come to the double team when Akeem comes and gets the ball on the block early enough, you're coming out the game.
Yeah. Because you didn't do your job.
That's fear. So he had that for two years that I was there.
That everybody on the floor was like, where is the dream at? Right. On both ends.
We talked during March Madness about Sonogo and some of the other guys that were doing Ramadan during the tournament and during games where they weren't drinking, they weren't eating before the games at all. Hakeem did that too.
Yeah. Like very, it was big news at the time and not a lot of people understood what he was doing.
What would you see in him on those days where he had to go out and he had to be the best player on the court, but he could not have any water, could not have any food.

How did he gear himself up to be able to play at that next level?

The first year I saw it, I was like,

I didn't know until about five days in that he wasn't eating before the game.

I thought maybe it was like Ramadan ended at,

I wasn't Muslim, I'm not Muslim, so I didn't know the timing. I'm thinking he's gonna eat in that 5, we're playing at 7.30 right it's like no he's not eating until after the game it's crazy there's like a weekend and in that week I think he might have been playing a week in the NBA like what? like oh my god I can't even get through this interview without asking you for some water.
Like, what are you talking about? Do you need water? No, I'm good now. I'm on my ramen.
No, I'll be starting. But yeah, it's just amazing.
And that just lets you know your mental fortitude because, you know, now you see people with intermittent fasting or whatever, you know, to try to lose weight. So there is a point when you do it that you're like, man, I need something, and then it goes away.
You go through the wall. You go through the wall, and if you're spiritually connected like he was, he's sitting there, he's praying he's he's spiritually connected he broke through the wall easier yeah where for me if i'm in a meeting fasting like i'm not breaking through that wall it takes a lot it's because he's playing for something that's bigger than himself and so he's almost drawing strength from that whereas if you try to do it you're like i'm gonna play through this because i'd really like to be able to see able to see my second ab in a month.
That doesn't give you the same motivation. It's not the same motivation at all.
And it doesn't put the same pressure on it because you're not doing it for yourself. It's kind of like taking the pressure.
Dean Smith used to say, we play a big game, North Carolina State or Duke or somebody, not Duke, the school from Durham, sorry. If we play in one of them and he go, coming in, you think he's going to have this big rah-rah speech? And he go, you know, there's billions of people in China that don't even know we're playing today.
All right, let's go. And that was it.
That was the pregame speech. And we go out.
And it just put things in perspective. Yeah, put you at ease.
It puts you at ease. so that you know it's go.
And that was it. That was the pregame speech.
And we go out. Yeah.
And it just put things in perspective. Yeah, put you at ease.
It puts you at ease. So, you know, that you know it's bigger than you.
This is not – this is nothing. Yeah.
You mentioned the school from Durham. I'm a big-time Coach K hater.
How awesome was that sending him off the way that North Carolina did? I'm a hater, and I loved it. Well, you have to do the whole fake respect thing.
No, it's not fake. Okay, all right.
Because when someone or something brings the best out of you, you can't really hate it. You have to have a level of respect for it.
And their teams, they will bring the best out of you

if you're not ready when he was there.

So I got to respect it.

Actually, it was one of my final schools too.

And, you know, between – it was North Carolina, Duke, and Virginia.

So those are the only three schools I visited.

So I always had a respect for what they was.

But I just knew we were better.

Yeah. Why did you pick UNC over Duke? Well, there's a lot of reasons.
But I think a lot of schools had at that time, they were like, oh, we have a great basketball program. We have a great academics.
We have a great social life. But North Carolina had all three.
They had everything. It was like, you ever see movies when you're growing up about college life you go damn it's frat houses and studying and whatever it might bask women just say women yeah yeah the girl and the colors i have a theory everything yeah even like because you watch a movie and you're like it's not just the women it had everything yeah it was like the size of it like you know that big university like you university, like, you know, those fake universities.
Big U is coming to you. Yeah, yeah, right.
And he got game, yeah. It looks like that.
Yeah. And I was like, I was amazed by that.
Like, I was just amazed. It felt like every day I was on a movie set.
It didn't feel like it was real. Yeah.
I do have a theory that like at least 20 20 of the student population at unc goes to unc just because the colors are that good the colors there i mean it is like you'd wear it the rest of your life the argyle is being able to wear the carolina blue for the rest of your life is pretty cool it's pretty cool yeah and you you think about how athletics affects you know the decisions of academic academia because most people like had don't hear about schools. The first time they hear about them is through sport.
Yeah, for sure. They're like, oh, I'm going to go to that school because it's sport.
They don't know about the academics. Yeah.
All right. So this current playoffs, it's wide open.
It feels the most wide open it's been in a long time. Oh, it's the NCAA tournament.
Yeah, right. It's this parody.
Like, every team has a flaw. Every team has a strength.
Gun to your head, knowing right now, so we're taping this on Thursday. We're going to run it Friday, so there are some game sixes playing on Thursday night.
Who do you have? The best overall team in basketball is the Denver Nuggets. Yep.
I like it. Speak on it, Kenny.
I like it. I mean, they have an MVP candidate.
They have a great point guard in Murray. They have young players, Gordon and Porter, that have kind of got some season in, got benched with Green.
They have no holes. Good coaching.
They have no holes. They just don't have experience.
Like, there is a different – it's harder to get to the finals than win it oh oh i like that it is i i actually agree with that because like even the warriors we you know they're gonna play game six on friday night but game five i bet the warriors because i was like this like you could just tell that like hey this team they won't go out like this like they have they aren't gonna panic they know it's an uphill climb to come back 3-1, but they also aren't going to be like, we got to do everything different. It's like, no, we got to just play our ball.
It's hard. It's hard because there's a threshold.
But some teams will panic, yeah. There's a threshold very similar to what we were just talking about.
There's a threshold in the fasting that you got to break through, not just to get an ab. You know what I mean? Just like you said, it's like you have to give yourself other than yourself to break through that threshold for a team.
And that, you can only learn it by experiencing it. And it's hard.
I can't even describe it just the same way if you say when you're hungry and you're fasting, how do you break through that hour when you want to eat and you did it? You can't really explain it verbally, but you did it. It's the exact same feeling.
Like you cannot explain it, but you got to go through it to get to the Western Conference. When you're in that Western Conference finals or you get in that Western semis and you're like, I got a breakthrough.
We got a breakthrough as a team. And you go, and then all of a sudden you're like, man, you realize how valuable Scotty Brooks was who was the 11th man on the team.
And you start realizing how valuable that is. And no one understands.
They'll be like, oh, Tristan Thompson's just on the team for sure because he's a Kardashian and da-da-da-da. There's something that he's got to do to help that team break through, even as a guy who's not playing.
Yeah. They've also got the best mascot in the NBA right now, Rocky.
Have you seen – did you see the ladder shot that he made the other day? No, I'm missing it. He put up a – Oh, you're talking about – Oh, yeah.
Rocky's always been there. A ladder on a ladder and threw it over his head.
And're playing for Rocky. You played in Denver, right?

I played in Denver. Rocky and the Houston Rockets

guy, Turbo, was the best

mascot ever in history.

Turbo was crazy.

When you play in Denver,

people always talk about the altitude when it comes

to football. And that seems to be the end

of the conversation. But in basketball,

it makes a difference too, right? Yeah, it's funny how it's also psychological, though. Like, when you really think about it, you feel it more.
Yeah. Right.
Yeah, but they – I don't – like, for me, it would only – it did affect me, like, in terms of – I didn't get as tired, but I would get dizzy. Mm- people don't realize Utah's at a higher altitude.
And no one ever says playing in Utah is tough with the altitude. Yeah, that's a big time people forget that.
And it's bigger. But those first, when you come in and warm up, when I felt, I would try to warm up there harder because I get dizzy I would get a little dizzy and I and I knew it was from the altitude just like for like a minute like you feel a little like a little lightheaded and then it kind of like it subsides and it goes away and about second quarter you don't feel it but that first quarter you Denver I felt a burning in my throat Utah I felt lightheaded yeah okay yeah so on the other side of that what happens to Denver to make them not win the championship what's the what's their weakness you said everybody's got holes that's just a fact the weakness is like will Gordon and Porter break through the threshold and become famous.
Like the regular season is when you make your name. The playoffs, you get famous.
That's fame. Like people know me.
He broke the NBA record for threes. He hit the three to tie it up in the NBA finals.
They don't say anything about, yo, against the Clippers in game 63, this dude, I never get asked about this. When I hit a game winner, I hit a game winner against the Clippers.
I've never been asked about it. I was actually going to ask you about that.
I never talked about it until just that. You didn't talk about it? So the game winner that you hit against the Clippers, that must have been an amazing moment for you.
Yeah, exactly. What was going through your head when you made that shot? Going through my head is like, okay, where am I going after? What's popping in this city tonight? And I hit the game with it.
Somebody might remember that. So they haven't had those moments that Wiggins and Poole have had in playoffs.
Now we know them for that. We know the Poole party not for the regular season because it was last year.
So now when he's in the playoffs, he's struggling. We're like, yo, where are you? Like, what you doing? Because it was the playoffs that he did.
Right. You guys, obviously, part of the reason why everyone loves your show is that you guys are honest, and it doesn't feel – it feels like four friends sitting on a set talking about basketball, having a conversation.
Or four friends that will lie to each other in their face. Yeah, that too.
That too. Like, no, I wasn't there.
That wasn't me. Yeah.
But has there ever – what player has been the most mad at something you guys have said? What's player? Yeah. Oh, I thought you meant which one of us.
Shaq gets the maddest at what we say to him. Oh, I love, yeah, I love when Shaq gets mad.

You could tell, too. Shaq gets easily

the maddest. Yeah.

Well, he's the new guy.

He's been at 14 years.

That's what I'm saying. He's not new anymore.

You could do 20 more years of it and he'll still be the new guy

because that's just how our brains work.

He's just like, well,

he's going to get mad if you're apprehended.

Charles calls him Petty White. Richard Petty.
So, yeah. But, well, no one's ever been mad at me the way I think Kevin Durant has been mad at Chuck.
That's true. Or have that fuel.
Because I have a rule. I'm never going to say anything about your passion or your heart.
I can't measure that. But if your ass don't run back on D, I'm going to be like, yo, he doesn't get back.
He doesn't have the effort. Look, he's not running back.
He's not being in his position. And you can't fool me because'm not, I'm going to toot my horn.

I think I'm the best in the business of breaking down film.

I know what your defensive assignments were based on the last three plays.

Right.

It's like, so you weren't there.

Like you can't lie.

Run, let me run to the big board.

Let me hit my knees together and run to the big board and try to see what goes on.

And I'm going to show it.

So they never, they might not like what I say or point it out, but they can never be mad because I'm never like, yo, this dude doesn't have any heart. Yeah.
You had a race with Ernie to the big board the other day. He almost beat you.
Some were saying that he was going to beat you to the last step. Never again because I've been doing some, there's treatment on my legs now.
They did get you, was it this week or last week? When are you talking about treatment on your legs? Are you talking about squats? No, it's a treatment, man. You're talking about steroids.
No, it's a machine, and it's a workout with it. It's called a newbie, and I've been doing that with and doing all this.
Just to get to the board? Just because I was like, man, I'm not running like I used to run, man. This is crazy.
So you're saying Ernie will never beat you? He'll never. They locked your chair.

Was it last week or this week they locked your chair?

Never beat me.

Let me show you something.

That was very funny.

Let me show you something.

Okay, I could never do this because we're on camera too.

I couldn't do this.

Right?

I would sit there.

It couldn't get up.

Oh.

One leg.

That's good.

All right, let's race to the board.

Now?

I just beat you.

I beat you to the part of my tape board.

I can't beat me, bro.

You can't beat me now. What happens if Ernie beats you? You said never, so you got to put some stakes on it.
Never. So if he beats you, you got to suspend yourself.
No, that's not fair. Because if I bet you a bet on a never, I'm the only one that loses.
Because never could never happen for you, and you never have to pay up. So you know what I'm saying? Yeah, that's true saying yeah that's true yeah yeah there has to be a time limit uh-huh he will never beat me this year how about that and what are you going to give him no what are you let's make the bet because you seem like you got some ernie johnson fanfare going if ernie beats you to the board right you have to get a cat.
Yeah.

How about that?

And I have a dog already.

Yeah, you got to get a cat.

That is the stupidest bet ever.

Yeah, it is.

It's really stupid.

It is.

The stupidest bet I've ever heard of.

And if he doesn't, Hank, our producer, has to get a cat.

No, no.

No, no, no, no.

Pizza party.

No, pizza party.

We'll get you a pizza party.

No, I don't want a pizza party.

You don't like pizza?

No.

What's the matter with you?

If you, you have to get a pig, a guinea pig.

Oh, guinea pig.

A guinea pig.

Well, how many more times are you going to race?

It might not even be.

Yeah, you should do it for next year.

You should do it for next year because there's only like two weeks left.

There's no more games left.

Yeah, we do it.

We might not go back to the studio but one more time.

Yeah, okay.

We're going to go on the road. For next year then.
Next year. Next year.
All next season. Oh, I'll be flying through this.
I'll be jumping. You know how we have those stairs? I'll be jumping from one to the top by the end of this.
All right. So next year, you get a cat.
If he beats you, we'll get a guinea pig. Yeah, and you got to have it in studio.
Okay. Yeah.
Okay. Done.
Deal. Done.
Deal. Done deal.
So we got to root for Ernie next year. I'm going to poison the shit out of you.
Yeah. We got to root for Ernie.
I'm going to do it like Nancy Kerrigan. If I see Ernie like winning, I'm running and tackling.
I don't want a cat. No.
I don't want a cat. They're too sneaky.
All right. Well, Kenny, this has been awesome.
Everyone go buy the book. It is, if you're watching on YouTube right now, you can see it.
Talk of Champions, stories of the people who made me. I have one last question.
Yes. It's a Roback question.
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Non-basketball related, we were down in miami this past weekend for f1 you were there too how was it first time ever being there yeah yeah it was fun it seemed like you have fun knew your way around a little bit yeah f1 was fine i don't know spots yeah you had some fun a little bit fun yeah what what i don't get it I was just asking if you had fun. You said you had fun.

I want you to have fun. I went to

F1 and the

Heat game on the same day. Oh.

So I went from F1. I started at like noon.

Left at 3.

Got to the Heat game at 3.45.

First quarter just started. Watched the game.

Then went to my main man.

Miles at prime 112.

Went to the prime 112. Finished the night.
It was fun. It sounds awesome.
You got some beach time. It was really hot down there.
I'll see. You know what the funny thing is? Well, we watched your show.
I had no idea where you were. I was like, what are you talking about? I just caught the joke.
Because the funny thing is, I i'm like is it really news that i'm on a beach i was like i'm like it really is like i've do this like there's up 10 000 other people here yeah and it and it was trending and i was like well maybe it wasn't me yeah maybe it wasn't you in the picture yeah it looked like fun it looked like fun It looked like fun. I got one follow-up question.
This is basketball. This is strictly basketball-related, though.
Just see if you know players in the NBA. Pop quiz.
Where is Anderson Vareja from? From Brazil. You really know a lot about Brazil.
Wow! You're not funny. Wow.
Damn! You know Brazil. This man is a Brazil.
You must know some people from Brazil. my portuguese is picked up all right well kenny thank you as always man great to see you in person good too yeah that was better than what charles did we'll see you man all right man kenny smith was brought to you by peloton it's called me time for a reason so working out should work on your time.
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Okay, let's finish up the show with some Fire Fest of the Week. Hank? Yeah? What's up? What's up? What's your Fire Fest, Hank? The soul patch I have right now is tough.
Oh, he's trying to do it. We're taping this before the game.

So you're trying to reverse jinx it.

You did have on Wednesday's show a little error where you were like, yeah, Celtics won.

They're up 3-2.

Jason Tatum, 40 points.

So you're trying to reverse this?

Yeah, I'm just trying to.

I'm giving people listening to this or listening on Friday.

Right.

Right.

And you have a soul patch right now. Yep.
Is that a guarantee? Nope. I have a parking space in a garage and I've probably done to get into the parking space.
I turn around in the garage and then I park facing. So the car is looking at the exit.
So it's just easier to get out. Backing it out..
Done the three-point turn. I don't know.
I was thinking about how many times. Probably 500 times.
Pretty simple three-point turn. Sometimes there's more cars so it's a little bit tighter, but it's pretty standard, pretty basic.
Can do it in my sleep. Monday, I don't know what was going on.
I don't know if this is a Celtics loss hangover. Went to Target.
Just got couple groceries was coming back six o'clock and six o'clock at night do the three-point turn wasn't even looking go to put it in drive and just crunched into a pole that's in in my uh but you have cameras on this car i do have care i i wasn't looking that it was like uh you know it's just a one two three i've done it so many times i wasn't. I wasn't even thinking.
And I'm getting ready to sell the car and I have to get it fixed now. And it's a whole fucking ordeal.
This is my old car. I sold to you for $1.
You're selling it to Max for $2. But I have to spend.
I took it yesterday to the shop. I have to spend $2,300 to get it fixed.
Oh, so you can't drive it now. No, you can drive it.
So could Max still buy it from you for, could you pay Max? It sounds like it would be cheaper if you paid Max $1,000 to take your car. Yeah.
Technically this car has been totaled. No.
Well, it's a $2 car. Oh, true.
Yeah. That's true.
So it is totaled. Also, that sucks.
I feel bad for you. You haven't had anyone just hand you $2,500 recently, right? I could well no this room no I want a court settlement oh okay got it legally and you know the state determined that I was entitled to that money got it yes you're paying taxes on that money too since the state determined you should okay you should yep um that sucks yeah it's just a whole I put off no I mean I feel like yesterday I really locked in was like figure figure shit out because i put a lot of the chicago move and just logistical stuff uh off until after miami uh so having to deal with the car thing is not a fun wrinkle wrinkle yeah i should ever get the windshield fixed yeah okay nice i do think you should sell it to max though for like negative money no i might give i might i gotta talk to him but i might give him money and he has to go fix it i mean that's kind of what i did with you the windshield was broken and i was like here take my car for one dollars not my problem yeah so and i could just we'll see but yeah it's just there's nothing where i mean i i've i've had that happen actually in that car when i first first got it, I just was backing out of a spot,

and I hit a pole maybe going like three miles an hour,

and it just shattered the tail light.

There's just – because you know it's not that big of a deal,

but you're like, how am I so fucking stupid?

Hank and Al Horford, handshake meme, missing three-pointers.

Damn.

We'll come back to that. We'll come back to that.
You might have been wrong, PFT. No, I was referring to the last game.
Oh, okay. Well, no.
The last game, Art. Yeah.
Yeah. I was referring to the real last game that we had on Tuesday.
Two games ago. Hey, did you like those texts I gave you? I just sent you some Etsy stuff.
Yeah, what Big Cat just sent me. Well, I just thought we'd have a vision board.
We're a golf golf podcast now so i just sent him a bunch of pictures that say like golf is life got like in life things are these things are 7p in life there's hard choices and it's just a picture of all the golf clubs yeah i can't even read the text on it my favorite is uh i only golf on days that end and why yeah so just something for your vision you know maybe get a little board going so i just thought you wanted a little something to get you know get the pieces flowing i appreciate it this is all facts i'm reading facts yeah okay pft uh my fire fest the week is just basically that i've been in airports all week i've just i've i've become an airport user to the degree where i now recognize people that work at the airports it's like i I'm a local at the airport. They recognize me and they're like, welcome back, sir.
You got any clubs? You a club member? No. Well, here's the real fire fest is spending this much time in airports.
And it's not like we haven't traveled at all as a podcast over the seven years that we've been doing this show. I still don't have TSA pre-check yeah that's crazy and i don't have a

frequent flyer number well you were you were you and you and hank both were kind of riding on my coattails for a while yeah when we booked if we booked a flight all of us together you would get pre-checked because i had pre-checked which feels like a pretty big loophole it is but but i i've put off getting pre-checked for so long which is more potent than the actual check some say because I don't,

I have clear.

So if I have clear,

but the double, it's awesome. TSA pre-check on steroids.
So now when they've instituted the double where you get the pre-check plus clear, I cut the line of pre-check and at certain airports, they have the clear only station pretty much in Siberia, right? Where you have to walk for like 30 minutes to to this one sad room yeah and then go with the other clear standard members through there um but it's been i really should have had a frequent flyer number at some point but i i've reached the point where now i just think about all the miles that i would have had and that makes me so upset that i kind of refuse to get it now in the future i'm like well i'm probably not going to travel anymore for this is that this is a lesson though our corporations in america just like they get fat on off guys like us yeah who don't fill out paperwork don't take vacations don't get refunds don't you know like if they if they send me a voucher i won't use it in time all that shit like we are a dream when they do the whole you know graph and they say these are the amount of people that won't actually opt in for these freebies yeah we're the poster child yeah and when it comes to the the frequent flyer numbers i'm pretty sure that if you don't have one the person who books your travel just puts theirs in yeah and they're like i'm gonna take those miles so now like spider is gonna be just traveling across all your country yeah he's got all my all my flyer miles for like seven years yeah so i've just been in airports non-stop but i've gotten really good

i've reached the point where now i get upset at people that don't know the rules as they're going

through the line i'm that traveler now where i'm just like come on man it's not you don't have to

take your shoes off you see that machine that's yeah that's a litos machine yeah you don't need

to do your shoes off for that um and actually i was on a plane uh two days ago and the uh the

flight attendant gave the big pregame speech of like,

Thank you. You don't need to do your shoes off for that.
And actually, I was on a plane two days ago, and the flight attendant gave the big pregame speech of like, put your phones in airplane mode that you hear. You guys never follow that, right? No.
I don't think I've ever put my phone in airplane mode, at least for the last six or seven years. No.
Nobody does. Never.
So I ignored it. I don't have a charger.
Yeah. To save some battery.
But I ignored it as one does.

And as everybody else on the plane does.

And then about five minutes later, they get back on the intercom and they're like, hey,

I'm serious.

Not only do you guys can't have your phone on the data, everybody has to turn their phone

off on this plane right now before we take off.

And they were like serious about it.

That's crazy.

And I was looking around and everybody was just like, yeah, okay.

So we all turned our phones off except for the guy next to me. And I was about to dime out i was like no you can't do this guy but i didn't i wanted to because if they may i don't want to fly on an airplane where the possibility that some guy is playing candy crush will result in the plane not taking off and they made it sound like that i'm pretty sure the dude was just on a power trip right because i definitely was i've never had the double speech about hey i'm serious about putting your phones i think it's just they want you to pay attention that's really what because i remember i mean i think did we ever do a mount rushmore of stupid things we thought as kids yeah you've yeah you've talked yeah the game boy basically controlling the plane also i thought uh testicles were just play-doh in in your nutsack uh but yeah i like i'm pretty sure when you realize the moment that it's just because they want you to pay attention yeah you're just like fuck this i'm not paying attention i used to think that uh if i got a boner it meant i had aids there was i mean we actually the aid scare was big back they shouldn't have been telling second graders hey you're going to get aids i definitely thought like drinking a water fountain yeah i blame magic johnson there's some fucked up the awareness going around the awareness was raised too high yeah uh but yeah so basically i'm just a full-time traveler now yeah that sucks uh but you know what are you gonna do uh it's been it's been a very fast pace last couple weeks i'm looking forward to like just getting some sleep maybe this weekend but uh the travel people don't realize that travel sitting down in a plane makes you so tired.
Yeah just sitting down in a cab makes you so tired dude you gotta do tedx health while you're on the plane what is that um every hour you get up and you go to the bathroom and you do a hundred squats it won't be annoying for anyone else only a hundred yes it won't be annoying for anyone else on the plane that's the russell wilson workout yeah start Start doing high knees in the aisle. This is what I do when you have to have oxidized water, eat almonds.
It's a whole thing that just makes traveling even worse than it already is, and it's the worst thing ever. That would actually rock because this is about a 45-minute flight from D.C.
to New York. So you don't have to.
So get my workout in on that 45-minute flight. That would be like 100x.
Dude, if Mark Cuban purchased my brain, I had the idea of dentists on airplanes. Just take care of all the bad things that you have to do in life on an airplane.
There should be a gym on the airplane. Yes, there should be a gym.
There should be a dentist. You should be able to get your hair cut.
You should be able to get your taxes done. When you get on an airplane, it should just be like, here's everything you've been putting off.
Fixing Hank's car. All that stuff.
There should be showers on an airplane. Should be an auto repair shop on an airplane it should just be like here's everything you've been putting off fixing hank's car all that stuff there should be showers on an airplane should be an auto repair shop on the airplane yep what what are you looking at max you max is a limited mindset kind of guy no just the showers one was weird i thought why why because it was all i think showers are nice well after you oh that's true no you're talking about bath sitting there.
Yeah, no baths. I'm talking showers.
The shower is nice. So it doesn't fit with doing the shit that you don't want to do on an airplane.
There should be somebody with a hot water hose that just goes through the aisle, just sprays everybody down on the plane. No, the shower should be in a room with holes in the floor that you're standing on.
And that's how rain gets made. And the water just comes out.
So it's a double shower. You're showering on the people you're flying over, too.
Okay. It's like Dave Matthews going over the Chicago Bridge.
It would evaporate by the time it landed. Is that how water? Yeah, for sure.
Probably. It becomes a cloud.
All right. My Fyre Fest is a pretty simple one.
My daughter's birthday is coming up. We're doing a Moana-themed birthday party.
And I think I was trying to be a good father I'm thinking about maybe dressing up like Maui which is played by The Rock it's animation and I don't think I can pull it off and I think that I'd scare all the children if I try to do that because I'd have to put my shirt off you just get the tattoos yeah so it's one of those moments where it's like hey maybe you should get in shape for your kids not even so that you can live longer just so you could dress up like maui because that'd be like a cool thing for me to do so i mean i don't know i mean this uh not as an insult no it's fine you can insult me well it's not about you okay max could pull off moana oh what's his name maui maui max could pull off maui like really really well. Max, $200.
Does Maui have- $200 for one hour. Just come by and just entertain the kids.
$200, one hour. Bring your club.
I'm negotiating right now. $300.
$500. Okay, done.
But you have to be shirtless. That's way scarier.
That's way worse. Dude, it's a compliment, actually.
This dude's powerful. Yeah, he is.
It's a great movie, by the way. It's in my head.
Also, I forgot, but Disney movies when we were growing up, they're all scary. I've been watching Little Mermaid.
Ursula is so fucking scary. Yeah, The Lion King is basically like a Shakespeare play where there's murder and a lot of murder.
I don't know. It's weird because I feel like they don't make the scary movies anymore for kids.
But watching Little Mermaid, I'm like, dude, Ursula still freaks me out. Yeah.
Aladdin's pretty scary, too. Yeah.
Ursula just fat. She's just mean.
She is fat, Jake. She is very very fat ursula she's very fat what was the russian one fantasia oh yeah that was a little bit past us that we were little mermaid aladdin lion king i'm missing one peter pan no that was too early i think um anastasia those were the big three Fantasia was that was the musical one Fantasia is also kind of scary it was a little bit scary it had all the axes yeah you know have you guys ever heard the theory about Frozen no oh yes why Walt Disney called why they called the movie Frozen I do but tell it for the people it's it's so that now there was all these rumors out there and it might be true that walt disney froze his entire body or at least his head so it could be reanimated once they come up with the technology to bring people back to life and so they named the movie frozen so that people when they googled walt disney frozen body or walt disney frozen head the first page on google would just be filled with things about Frozen the movie, which is actually a genius.

Yeah.

It's a smart move.

We should name this podcast Chinless.

Yeah.

And that way, when Hank has to shave his soul patch, you just find that instead of him.

This will be the episode.

Chinless Hank.

Chinless Hank.

I think it would look good.

That's not true.

That's just not true.

I think you will, Hank.

Thank you.

Not. He just fucking got you so bad.
Walked right into a knot. Dude, you should have seen your face.
You got fucking owned there. Billy, Firefest.
No, like, honestly, if anybody I think would be handsome, I think it would be Hank with this old patch. Anybody in this room, I mean.
You'd be the handsomest. I'm not going to respond.
Sonk. Listen.
I didn't respond, so you sonked.

No, you did by saying I'm not going to respond.

It's not like you've been spending a decade calling me fat,

so I'll be nice when you have to get a soul patch.

Okay, great.

Great.

Great.

I already have one.

Oh, Max is mad right now.

Yeah.

Whatever.

You're jinxing.

All right.

It's Friday, dude. Understand where the people listening to this is friday all right billy so i got a small backyard and every friday i have to weed it before i can like use it for the weekend because the weeds grow back in five days it's insane why do you have to weed it though so that i can chill back there You can't chill amongst the weeds? Because that's what makes it buggy.

Oh, okay.

That's what brings the ticks out.

Yeah.

There's no way you've weeded that backyard more than twice.

No, seriously.

I've weeded it like every Friday.

Billy, do you think that maybe-

There's weeds right now.

Hypothetically, do you think that maybe one of those weeds that you spend so much time

rubbing your arms and legs on has given you the rash that you've had for the past six months? Good question, PFT. No.
I use gloves. But they still touch you.
No, that's not it. Okay.
I'm just putting that out there. That's a good point.
Put it out there. You might want to check.
That's a good point. That's a good point.
Just an update. I have now purchased $200 worth of Maui costumes.
A couple different sizes. We're going to see how this goes.
I'll update everyone. Why don't you just get the muscle suit? Well, there's a suit that you can wear, but it's going to be scary because I'm going to be fat.
And it's going to be... I'll send a picture when I do it.
But I'm committed to it. Billy, so you're just weeding all the time in your backyard? Yeah.
It's a nice activity. Okay.
It's kind of relaxing. Okay.
But they keep fucking growing. Well, that is what weeds do.
But in five days? Yeah, why don't you just get weed killer? Because that's bad for you. That's okay.
Look up atrazine. I'll take your word for it.
It's Agent Orange, right? It's an easy solution. You don't have to touch it You just kill the weeds They're gone Look up what Roundup does I trust you Kills the weeds so you don't have to weed anymore Also thanks to everybody for the kind words Oh people like kind words People like kind words We told you that people would be fine with it.
There was a lot of kind words.

I appreciate it.

What was the meanest thing?

Oh, dude.

It got bad.

The meanest shit that was said.

Okay.

Yeah, I want to hear the meanest shit that was said.

Just give me one mean one. But I knew that the majority of AWLs would be nice about it.
No, there was a majority. I almost don't want to say this because it might negate all the...
Okay, all right, all right. Yeah, don't highlight the negative.
Yeah, text it to me. I want to laugh about it.
All right, Jake, finish this off. We have to redo the golf video which one because my fault we played by the wrong rules an alternate shot oh yeah fuck the people like dude that's not scramble it's not i don't know what the fuck any of this shit is we just go out and golf and it's funny that's my lane i should have been on top of that i take responsibility you're supposed to tee off no no no jake no, no.
Jake, Jake, Jake. We're going to do, whenever we make a golf video, my promise to the AWLs is we're going to say that we're playing one way and then play the opposite way.
Well, fuck you. We're mad about that.
Memes. Fucking memes.
I was talking about that. I was like, yeah, I didn't realize that.
We fucked up the rules. He's like, oh, I did.
But I don't care. This is a lie.
He had no idea. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
He was like, he's like, i did but i don't care it's a lie he had no idea wait wait wait wait he was like he's like i knew i don't know he's like i knew the whole time i just didn't say anything i actually blame hank because hank was competing in it and so hank knew that the rules were being broken and he still let it go on no no i didn't realize i i didn't know what the best i didn't know what a best ball on a scramble is yeah as much as i know i know a golf, I was. No, I knew the difference between that, but the alternate shot.

Say someone, if Hank finishes a hole, Big Cat doesn't automatically.

Don't care.

No, I care.

At all.

I care very much just because we lost.

I actually wouldn't care, but because we lost, this is a great out for me. The only reason it's my Fyre Fest is because the AWL certainly cared.
And guess what I say to them? Don't care. I am going to make it my mission that we always say we're doing one rule, explain the rules, and play a different way just to make people upset.
Also, that's funny because to watch a video and have us explain that we're playing it one way and then play a different way, which we consistently played the entire time. Right.
And then be like, oh, this video. How could I watch it? You said you were doing this.
Shut the fuck up. I also think it's impossible to make a golf video with you not fucking up a rule somehow.
Like they will find something wrong with everything that you do. This is what golf fans do when there's no U.S.
Open where they can call in rules because some guy didn't tie his shoes in a bunker,

they go to YouTube golf videos and they deputize themselves as police officers.

They're like, no, actually, this is all fucked up.

I'm calling the cops.

I have a video coming out next week and I had to pick up on a par three because I couldn't get out on a bunker.

So I Googled, what do I write down on my score before people come after me?

Infinity.

So I think an eight.

You shot an infinity.

Usually we play double play.

We're playing for fun.

All-time worst score ever.

I don't know. All-time worst round of golf ever by Jake.
Ten on a par three. Fifteen.
Fifteen? Yeah. So that's my fire fest.
I screw up the rules, but. Don't care.
Yeah. My fire fest is that you care.
Honestly. Don't listen to anyone.
No, but, like, I need a note for the rules, too. Like, we're going to we're going to be doing a lot of videos.
No, no, no, no, no. Do you hear what I said? We're going to purposely screw up the rules just to make everyone even extra.
I'm going to take three practice shots in a bunker. I'm going to actually practice.
I saw this one guy shooting the other day where he basically like pick it, like he picks up the ball. Like it's like Irish curling.
yeah and he like holds it on his uh golf club and then like launches it i'm gonna try to do that i like that people so mad you know what we should put in a rule oh no it's like to do that because you can't push the ball i looked up the rule who cares i'm gonna start doing that it's like when i'm like like 20 feet out just grab a nice fucking sand wedge and just like hold it and then maybe even walk it to the hole dunk it in we should put in a rule where you can you can kick your shot like you can set up your next shot if you're like in the woods you can get a one-legged swing and then you can try to kick the ball to safety dude and then that's your next shot we should have one one throw one throw per hole yeah why not that'd be a great video. Yeah, we're in.
Just to make. Oh, man.
Okay. Great show, everyone.
Who has a... Oh, you have a soul patch right now? Yeah.
I definitely do not have a soul patch right now. That's true.
That's confirmed. That's a fact.
Same with me, people, Paul. Correct.
And PFT. Yeah.
Also same with PFT. There's only one person who has the possibility of a soul patch right now that's true that's confirmed that's a fact same with me people paul correct yeah and pft yeah also same with p there's only one person who has the pot the possibility of assault that's a fact do i yeah it is also yes right now there's do i have one though no but i possibly could have you could have do i though do i have one or not it's like a 50 50 chance well you have one but you also have the rest of it surrounding it at least so yes you do, you do have a soul patch.
Correct. There is hair on that little.
It might just not be like only a soul patch. Bonus Fire Fest.
I have realized that like me having a soul patch makes absolutely zero difference because people just be like, correct. PFT's got shitty facial hair.
Okay. You know what? More at news at 11.
This is one of those things you had to find your own path yeah because we told you this three weeks ago but you had to find your own path and i've known that i've been faceballed for years but ironically the soul patch is the one thing that grows in true yeah but i told you like i think it might look more ridiculous than you guys think it'll look but still people just be like okay you got bogus you already have it was it was like i said when we when it first up, it'd be like if I was like, hey, let's do a bet. Who can gain 10 pounds? Yeah.
Or a mustache. All right.
Hank, have you ever gotten this? Nope. Have you ever gotten this? You've ever gotten this? No.
Lottery ball? Nope. Numbers.
17. Nice job, PFT.
Six. I'll go 99.
Oh, let's go 17. I'm feeling 69.
Let's go 17. Oh, I see 17 right there.
That's a good position. Oh boy.
See, the seats matter. You're going to get 17 anyways.
Oh my God. Oh my God.
He got it. He got it.
He got it. He got it.
It's six. He got it.
Oh my god. Oh, oh my god Let's go.
Thank you PFT. There was stunned silence for a few seconds.
It's over. Thank you PFT At least the Celtics lost.
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
What are you tweeting? You can't tweet it, Hank. Oh, my God.
I'm putting on a song. Oh, my God.
The Sixers have to win tonight because he can't. How is he going to celebrate this show if it finally backfired on us? I think we got to get rid of this lottery ball machine.
It's broken.

What is this?

Open it up.

What?

You're not doing money anymore?

No, you never gave me money.

You gave me $200 for what?

From the $2,500 I gave you.

I won that.

I can't believe you got it.

Oh, my God. This sucks.

This actually is the biggest fire fest ever.

Hank, what do I owe you?

I'll pay Hank.

I'm heartbroken. What do I owe you, Hank? Did we just put on the shirts, too? Yeah.
Oh, my God. Congratulations, Hank.
Oh, I can't wait. I hope if I see you and you're wearing one, I can't fucking wait.
Congratulations, Hank. Congrats on getting one lottery ball.
That, wow. He's all the way back.
He's all the way back.

Let's calculate the probability of getting it once in how many times?

That was the first time for his number six.

Now 26 is the only number.

That's a nine.

Wait, that's a nine, big cat.

Oh, that is a nine.

It's a nine.

That's a nine. It's not a six.

That's a nine.

Wait.

No, the line's under.

Jake, shut the fuck up.

Damn it, Jake.

What the fuck is wrong with you, Jake? Hank was buying it. Jake can't lie.
No. I mean, I.
I know. It's brutal.
Jake was. Jake, once he did the oh my God bike.
That was a great call. One of your best.
Oh my God. I mean, for the listener, for people who are just listening, they probably thought it would be broken.
Can we end the show when Hank thought it was number nine? There were no airwaves for like three seconds. Oh, man, this sucks.
Good job, Hank. I'm so happy for you.
How are you going to celebrate? You fucking piece of shit. Congrats.
Dude, that's... Wow.
This makes tonight even crazier. It's an owing on yourself that you're this happy about it.
Yeah. It's actually sad.
That's sad. No, no, no No look what a loser I love the fans of this show I love going out Yeah we know The fucking people coming up to me every two seconds and just whispering numbers in my ear Yelling numbers at me Driving past me on the street and yelling numbers Coming up to me in the grocery stores and be like Hank have you ever gone on? I'm happy you're listening to the show.
I'm so happy I don't have to deal with that anymore. I think it's sad how much you're celebrating this.
Dude, it's a number of machines. It's a great storyline.
You should have gotten this three years ago. Yeah.
Well, you know what's worse? It's like graduating when you're 22 and everyone's like, oh my God, I can't believe that you've got to see an algebra. It's worse because you forced me into getting it.
If you would just let me do my thing, I wouldn't have gotten it. Yeah, it's true.
You're welcome. I know.
I thank you forever. That was one of the best things you've ever done for me.
You're welcome. And I knew, because you picked 17, which I would have picked.
So I kind of got it. But then I know when someone else picked 17, my strategy was pick one of the numbers that has been picked.
Because the worst case scenario would have been if all the numbers had gotten picked and it would have been one more number down if you hadn't picked 17. Do you want me to grab you champagne? Yeah.
Yes, please. All right.
Actually, no. No, I'm not drinking champagne.
I'm not drinking champagne. That would have been so great.
Fuck, damn it. I almost got him.
Me and Max. Damn Max.
I almost got him. So, Hank, here's what we're going to do.
Me and Max just had a moment where we looked at each other like, Hank's about to do the Max Champagne thing. I was so excited.
Fuck. I almost got him.
Hank, so congratulations. You've gotten it.
We'll keep doing this lottery ball. I think what we should do is I'm going to buy a bigger lottery ball machine for the Chicago office.

So we can start afresh on someone not getting it.

So we'll start afresh.

And maybe you'll be the first one to get that one.

This one is sad.

I'm sad.

It's bittersweet.

No, it's sweet.

No, I know it's sweet for you, you fucking piece of shit.

God damn it. I'm going to have a kid.
Yeah. That's right.
Do you want to tell him now? I'm going to have a kid, Hank. Are you fucking serious? Yeah.
Anything you want to say to me? I don't know. This is fake.
No, it's not. No.
He's only told me. What? I'm going to be a dad.
Pitsy's going to be a dad. I'm going to be a dad.
Yeah. What? I also have cancer.
Okay. All right.
Big Cat's very, very sick. Oh, Billy already used his on the last one.
All right. Congrats, Hank.
It sucks. If the Celtics win this series now, Hank, it's going to be the summer of Hank, and he's going to just own the whole summer.
But if they lose tonight, is this a happy show or a sad show for Hank? Oh, he's definitely still sad. He's going to have a fucking soul patch.
I think the lottery ball is bigger. This helps a lot.
No, no, it's not bigger. Yes, I think the lottery ball was so much bigger than Celtics.
It's like, again, it's like going out with a soul patch, going out with a soul patch and having people yell numbers at you the whole time. That not having to be a thing is great.
I think you just, I think you made a deal with devil. It's like the cursed monkey paw.
You can get a wish and you wish to get the lottery ball correct. But the sacrifice that you have to pay is that your Celtics.
No, I think God has been putting me through the ringer as a Boston sports fan the last couple of weeks. And this is his way of showing me that we're on the way back.
All right. Well, Hank, I am actually me that's I wanted you to get it eventually I just wish it had gone like five more years well it's just like you know like you love the storyline it's like he would have been one away from the lottery machine beating me if PFT didn't pick 17 yeah that's great that would have been Jake I would have been shit in my pants Jake's been staring at me for the last 30 seconds trying to figure out if I'm really going to be a dad.
Yeah. I can't figure it out.
I can't figure it out. I think it is.
I think we're all... Wait.
Aren't you way more concerned about my cancer? The fuck? I... A lot of cells dividing on this side of the table.
I will be a dad. I'm going to be a dad.
One day?

Or? I love you guys.

They're

trying to clone the Tasmanian devil. Also,

go to my Twitter if you want to see the greatest bear

fight of all time. Billy Hot Takes.

It's pinned.

Oh, that sucks. I don't know what I'm to say, I'll say it anyway Today is another day to find you shying away I'll be coming for your love again Take on me Take me home I'll be gone In a day or two So needless to say I'm odds and ends But that's me, I'm stumbling away Slowly learning that life is okay and say after me

it's no better to be safe than sorry and take on me Take me on I'll be gone in a tale tomb Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, guitar solo And all things that you say Is it liable Just to play my worries away You're all the things I've got to remember You're shying away I'll be coming for you anyway Take on me Take me on I'll be gone in a day or two

I'll be gone in a day or two

in a day or

two

Thank you so much. Thank you guys.
Thank you so much. Thank you, guys.

Thank you. Thank you very much.

Wonderful.