Adam Schefter, Live From The NFL Combine Plus Fyre Fest Of The Week

Speaker 1 Hey, pardon my take, listeners. You can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube.
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Speaker 1 See Mintmobile.com. On today's part of my take, we have our good friend Adam Schefter

Speaker 1 on the podcast. Maybe, former good friend.
Yep. It will be

Speaker 1 let's just say it's a wild ride. It's a wild ride of an interview.
Great interview with Adam Schefter. We're live from Indy talking Combine, getting ready for the Combine.

Speaker 1 We did did some training today. We also will do Fire Fest of the week.
And don't worry, we did film an extra lottery ball at the end.

Speaker 1 So maybe today's the day that Hank will get it. I got good vibes.
I have, I'm feeling like this is the day. Sam.
I really do. So I'm excited.
Ball's here. Kids are back in school.
Vacations are over.

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Speaker 1 let's go.

Speaker 1 Now in the street, there is violence,

Speaker 1 and then a lot of

Speaker 1 work to be done.

Speaker 1 No place to hang out or washing,

Speaker 1 and then I can't blame all on the sun.

Speaker 1 Oh no, we're gonna rock down to Electric Avenue,

Speaker 1 and then we'll take it higher.

Speaker 1 Oh, we're gonna rock down to Electric.

Speaker 1 Welcome to part of my take. Today is Friday, March 3rd, and we are live from the Combine.
Indianapolis, Indiana. Hank playing flip cup.
Max, get us some more water. Yeah, boys, Combine week.

Speaker 1 We're here. What a magical place Indianapolis is.
I'm happy football is back. Football is officially back.
It was a long week and a half, kind of. I guess the XFL was around technically.

Speaker 1 But yeah, football is officially back.

Speaker 1 I've reached the point where

Speaker 1 I think I'm over Combine Week. Maybe I'm just getting old.
Maybe I'm a very old 28 years old. Well, I have some thoughts because go on, but I agree.
I was going to say

Speaker 1 it's a bunch of football guys that flock to the same place, go to the same bars, eat the same shrimp cocktails. It's like March of the Penguins.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 If they were wearing lanyards and trying to bang waitresses.

Speaker 1 So I agree for a different reason.

Speaker 1 I just would like to do Combine Week, but with couches. So I was thinking about it last night.
We were at a bar, and I've had the long-standing take. It's not like some novel thing.

Speaker 1 Bigger guys understand. Not being able to sit down at a bar is torture.

Speaker 1 It's no different than getting waterboarded.

Speaker 1 So I was standing at a bar for about an hour and a half. That's usually my capacity.
And the whole time I was like, this would be sweet if I could sit down.

Speaker 1 So maybe that's the issue is Combine Week just needs to be in recliners and couches. Everyone's sitting in a big circle, maybe dozing off here and there.
That would be nice.

Speaker 1 No, you make a good point because I hate networking. I hate it, but I think I would enjoy networking a lot more if it was like a living room.
Sitting down. If it was at a house party.
Right.

Speaker 1 I think we pitched that to John Taffer when he came on the show.

Speaker 1 Correct. A bar with couches that were at like seven different bars inside the same restaurant.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we pitched that exact idea because I said I was like, the problem with going to bars is if I can't find a seat, I want to go home. Yeah, no, I agree.
I'm sick of standing.

Speaker 1 I don't like to stand up. Standing is the most overrated thing people can do.
That's actually, they should test players for that at the Combine who can just stand the longest.

Speaker 1 Apple Watch, when it's like, hey, you haven't stood up in a couple hours, like, shut the fuck up. Yeah, that's by design.
I don't want to stand up. Yeah, mind your own business here.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Stupid bitch. But yeah, we are in Combine Week.
We are doing some. I don't really think we network.
We just see a couple people that we haven't seen in a while. Saw Arthur Smith.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 He looks great. Chin,

Speaker 1 like a Greek god.

Speaker 1 We have a couple interviews coming up next week. We talked to Kevin Stefanski, which was a great interview.

Speaker 1 So it's always fun to come here because it does feel like the whole football world descends on Indianapolis, and it's a very different vibe than the Super Bowl, where it's like, you know, flashy celebrities.

Speaker 1 Here it's like, who can eat the most steaks while they're talking about like free agency, wearing the team-issued polo.

Speaker 1 So it's funny because there was actually one person I was very excited to potentially see, and I still am, and that's Deuce Gruden. Yeah.
I'm just on the hunt for him. Remember, we did see

Speaker 1 him at that Starbucks that one year. I saw him.
I met him. Well, not really met him.
I was starstruck by him.

Speaker 1 We got into an elevator together, and then I just froze up, and I was just like looking at him. And then he got off the elevator.
I was like, that was awesome. Deuce Gruden.

Speaker 1 So I thought that I saw him last night at the bar, and that I was nervous. And Che was next to me, and I asked her friend Stephen Che, I was like, is that Deuce Gruden?

Speaker 1 And Steve was like, do you want me to go up and say, Are you Deuce? My friend over there wants to meet you. He's going to introduce me.
Do you like any of us here more than a friend? Yeah,

Speaker 1 he was going to be like, hey, my friend over there thinks that you're cute. And then my friend would be me.
And then I'd just be standing there like staring at him.

Speaker 1 So Steven went up to this guy and was like, hey, are you Deuce? And the guy was like, no, no, I'm not Deuce. And I was so, the wind was like totally out of my Zeus.

Speaker 1 He's the one guy that I've been on the hunt for. Foose? Yeah.
That's bullshit. Yeah, it was not good.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 And then we did, yeah, I mean, we basically, you know, you go to a couple bars, you see

Speaker 1 I did see Ciceliano. I think he realizes everything I've said about him.

Speaker 1 We were actually having a conversation about it after because PFTU was like I bet you he knows all the shit you talk about him and I realized that's one of those guys that like if I was in a hallway with him one-on-one I'd probably be like, hey, dude, I'm sorry.

Speaker 1 Like you don't understand. The reason why I say I want you to get hit by a bus is because Jake Marsh just squirmed so much when I say it.
Like it's really nothing personal.

Speaker 1 It's really just Jake's reaction has elicited this behavior where I just want to wish the worst thing possible.

Speaker 1 Don't take it personally, but I hope that you die. Right.
But only, no, I hope he dies only when Jake is around to hear me say that. Okay.
So right now, I don't hope he dies.

Speaker 1 What if he got hit by a bus in Indianapolis right now? But you could text, you could get Jake Marsh on FaceTime. If I was like FaceTiming him while it was happening.
No, afterwards.

Speaker 1 Like if you got to break the news to me. Yeah, I could be interested in that.
Yeah. Yeah.
And then the other, like, the big combine news, we're just all waiting for Bryce Young to get measured. Yeah.

Speaker 1 waiting with bated breath. I thought it was today.
It's actually Saturday. He's not getting measured until Saturday.

Speaker 1 I would assume he's just not going to shit for the next two days. Yeah, he's

Speaker 1 stretched out on a rack somewhere trying to get in. So he's going to do both.

Speaker 1 He's got to get tall and he's got to get fat. You can't get taller.

Speaker 1 It can't be done. But I do think that there's something to be said for a theory that if you measure to the eyes, that's what's really important.

Speaker 1 You shouldn't, the forehead is wasted space as far as a quarterback is concerned. Measure to the man's eye.
Maybe he's got high eyes. Maybe he's got high eyes.
He also,

Speaker 1 I don't know what his team is doing. There was a video of him walking into the combine next to a tight end.
You need him walking next to Andrew Silano or Ian Rapporteur. Or me.
Yeah, just

Speaker 1 find everyone that you basically have to Tom Cruise this. Like make the doors really small.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 In his, in his, you know, make like a miniature hotel room and take videos of him in his hotel room just being Andre the Giant. Pete Prisco.
Get Pete Prisco to hang out with him for a while. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I I am interested to see how much he weighs in. That's going to be, it's going to be a big deal

Speaker 1 if he comes in under 200 pounds. Well, the best part is, Peter Schrager, a friend of the program, said that he spoke to multiple teams and they all had no issue with his size.

Speaker 1 So I think it eventually will just not matter. It might matter when he's playing, but in terms of getting drafted, I don't think it will be that much of a bearing.

Speaker 1 I think he's going to go in the top five no matter what. So like if he, maybe if he like is 5'7, 160, that'd be shocking.
You'll see that. But still someone would take a first-round pick on him.

Speaker 1 Take a flyer. Because he played in the SEC and he was fucking awesome.
So yeah,

Speaker 1 I'm more worried about what his weight's going to be because that is an actual factor. Where you get hit by people, giants are going to be smashing you into the ground.

Speaker 1 It would be helpful if you weighed over 200 pounds. But he did play in the SEC.
He did. So when is he going to get measured? Saturday, 10 a.m.
It's literally hurry up and wait.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we're just sitting here. I'm just refreshing the feed.
When is he going to get measured? I I want to see those measurables. Let's fucking go.

Speaker 1 It's also funny if you take probably everybody that's working out this week at the combine and you put them on the BMI chart. Yeah.
They're all clinically obese. Yes.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 We're like probably in better shape than most NFL players. Maybe not the skill positions, but yeah.
Yeah, probably not punters. Yeah, I was going to say wide receivers are definitely not obese.

Speaker 1 100% not obese. I think if you're like six feet tall, 6'1, and you weigh 220 pounds, that might be obese on the BMI.
Maybe, yeah. BMI is such a crock of shit.

Speaker 1 It's also going to to be very funny, whatever Bryce Young weighs in and his height is at, everyone's just going to be like, that's bullshit. That's not real.
Yeah. No matter what.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Like he could, I think people actually want it. Like they are wishing for him to be 5'6.
It'd be very funny if

Speaker 1 he was listed at Alabama as being six feet tall. It's so funny how in college media, guys, you can just make up whatever you want.
You can just write down a number. Nobody will ever check it.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 He should weigh in at the North Pole. You weigh more at the North Pole than you do at the equator because of the bulge.

Speaker 1 Yes, that's true. Let's get, that's where you should do his pro day.
Yeah. All right.
What else is going on? I mean, we have... There's

Speaker 1 Jalen Carter. That was not good.

Speaker 1 Official statement by part of my take. If you are implicated in leaving the scene of a vehicular...
Well, it's not a homicide, just a death. Death.
Double death. Shouldn't do that.
Not good.

Speaker 1 Shouldn't do that.

Speaker 1 Be better.

Speaker 1 That's our official statement. There's room for growth.
Be better. Yes.
And again, it's another situation where everyone takes their like pause to say, oh my God, this is horrific.

Speaker 1 And then he'll still go top five. Oh, yeah.
I mean, he's a freak. Right.
And he released a great notes app. His notes app,

Speaker 1 I've never seen this before. It started with the word statement.
Yeah. Which was nice of him to clarify what it was.
It was all caps. Not good.
And then he switched it to a very serious font. Yes.

Speaker 1 So as far as he put it in the corner. He didn't crop.
It didn't crop. He didn't crop it.
That's my big issue.

Speaker 1 Everything else, he tried to format it to make it look as professional as possible while still taking a screenshot of your phone.

Speaker 1 And it looked like it was taken from a screenshot of a phone that was an Android, maybe, because the dimensions were all off on it.

Speaker 1 And it's a very sad story, but it's also the NFL loves these stories where something bad happens before they become

Speaker 1 get drafted. So Goodell can literally be like, not my problem.

Speaker 1 It does make me laugh thinking back about the Laramie Tunsell thing where he got the video came out of him smoking weed in a gas mask on draft night, like right before the draft started.

Speaker 1 And then every team was like,

Speaker 1 We can't be seen drafting this guy. He smokes weed.
Well, it was the gas mask. I think if it was just a joint, it would have been a little different.
He did look. The gas mask is a visual.

Speaker 1 He did look a little bit like a terrorist because he had the mask on, and then he had the Confederate flag behind him. Here's the thing.
It's kind of like the ISIS of the South. And here's the thing.

Speaker 1 If you're smoking weed out of a gas mask, that wasn't your first time.

Speaker 1 And that means, like, the gas mask is like five or six steps steps down the weed ladder where it's like, you really like to smoke weed.

Speaker 1 Again, I have no problem with that, but you, like, you, you know what I mean? Like, you start getting very creative, like a gravity bomb, gas mask.

Speaker 1 Those are both kind of in the same category where it's like, you got bored with smoking weed, which is almost impossible to do.

Speaker 1 Yeah, my, my concern is less the gas mask and more that he was videotaping himself ripping a barn out of a gas mask. Oh, it's cool.
No, no, it's kind of cool. No, but not send to your friends.

Speaker 1 It's cool. No, it's cool.
it's cool to do, but it's kind of corny behavior. Oh, I don't know.
Do you take a video of yourself doing that? No, sending that to friends.

Speaker 1 If I'm smoking a gas mask, my boys don't know about it. Dude, what kind of friend am I? That's instant giggles on the video.
If you smoke a gas mask and don't send it to me, I'll be offended.

Speaker 1 Yeah, okay. It's actually way

Speaker 1 bigger of a loser move to smoke out of a gas mask and just never have proof of it. I don't know about that.
Yes. No, dude.
If you're alone smoking with a gas mask,

Speaker 1 I'm not out here for addiction behavior. I'm not out here for clout.
Yeah, no. Oh, you're, yeah, right.
I'm not. Who does drugs on camera? Yeah, that's really the only time

Speaker 1 it's really

Speaker 1 not here for clout. There have been times when I have smoked out of a gas mask and didn't record it.
Not recently. Because this is before cell phone videos were

Speaker 1 invented.

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Speaker 1 The other big story was we had the report cards for all the NFL teams. Yeah, the NFL PA.
Great article.

Speaker 1 Seems like the Ravens are kind of falling apart because they got an F minus in strength and conditioning, and then they had multiple players tweet today being like, yeah, I never was injured, came to the Ravens, got injured.

Speaker 1 Sean Bateman was basically like, stop pointing the finger at us. Like, you guys get us injured all the time.

Speaker 1 If you look back on the last two years of the Ravens being the most injured team in football, something weird is going on there. And it's actually vindication for us as stupid fans.

Speaker 1 Whenever we see a bunch of soft tissue injuries, we're always like, they should fire that trainer. Strength and conditioning is a problem.
I think maybe it is actually a problem with the Ravens.

Speaker 1 And I actually don't, I know you don't want to talk about this because the commanders were the last, but they did not lose in this because the stories that came out of it were the rats in Jacksonville, and then the big story was the fact that the Cardinals charge for dinner.

Speaker 1 Yeah, there's that. That's an insane thing.

Speaker 1 Let's be honest, the big story that came out of it was the commanders getting an F-, which isn't really a grade. An F-minus doesn't exist.
They made up the destroyed F's.

Speaker 1 They made up the f- No, they got an A plus in strength staff. Yeah, or strength staff.
I think that maybe. Way better than the Ravens.
Yeah,

Speaker 1 they did get an F in treatment of families, which seems like a pretty important thing. The Jags did too.
Pretty important thing to be above an F in is how you treat families.

Speaker 1 Yeah, the Jags were an F in that, and it was because players' wives were breastfeeding on the floor of the restrooms in the stadium. They didn't give them a space.
They didn't have a space for that?

Speaker 1 Well, I just think that an F minus. Hank's okay with that.
F minus 1.

Speaker 1 I'm saying that makes sense why they got an F. Yeah.
And the rats. They had multiple weeks, they said, of rats.
Rat jacksonization. So I ran the numbers.

Speaker 1 I ran the numbers on the... Get a jack.
Yeah, get a Jaguar to just patrol. Put a Jaguar in the fucking locker room.
I ran the numbers on what the GPA should be.

Speaker 1 I took all the commanders' grades and put them into a formula. And then I even included F- as being worth negative 0.5 on the GPA scale.
And they ended up with a 0.9.

Speaker 1 So an F plus is what they should have gotten. F- doesn't exist.
If you get an F-, that's Goodell saying, I should drone strike your franchise. It should not exist.
But here's the thing.

Speaker 1 like, everyone expected the Commanders to be the lowest part, the lowest-rated team. The stories, like, the Bengals off days don't, you can't even get a banana.
That's what they said.

Speaker 1 They're like, if you show up, they tell you to come in and train in the off days on like Tuesdays in the season, and the cafeteria is completely closed.

Speaker 1 And if you wanted a banana or a Gatorade, they don't have that. Making you pay for meals is bad.
It's really bad. Rats exist in nature.

Speaker 1 Some people eat them on the streets of New York, according to a video that I saw.

Speaker 1 There's

Speaker 1 There was a long line to wait for the Chargers' showers. Yeah.
That sucks. There should not be a wait for a shower if you're a professional.
Like, those are the stories.

Speaker 1 How is that possible? Because they

Speaker 1 share a stadium with the Rams. No, no, no.
So their facility is under construction, so they're in a warehouse right now. Their practice facilities.
These are construction.

Speaker 1 There was a part of the Commanders that said

Speaker 1 they don't have hot water. That's another thing that should probably be important to have as a

Speaker 1 sports team. That goes out sometimes.
Also, cool plunges are back in.

Speaker 1 joe rogan's taught us about that oh that was start your day with a cool plunge and boom you're able to kick anyone's ass that was actually the chargers said that the cold cool plunge is never cold or it's not cold enough that would that would be a plus for me that's so brutal to just be like all right go on cold therapy and they're they just had and they said the hot tub didn't work a lot so they just have two lukewarm bodies of water in the facility i just think an f minus is it's rubbing salt in the wound yeah f minus come on but that was i mean it's cool i think this is the first year they did this where they did a full, it was almost more than half of the players,

Speaker 1 you know, commented on the poll, totally anonymous. Hopefully, teams will be like, oh, shit, maybe we, maybe we are getting everyone injured.
Shout out to Vikings.

Speaker 1 It just feels the Ravens are the real story because they're in the middle of talking to Lamar Jackson, who has been injured the last two years. And now players are saying, like, yeah, their strength.

Speaker 1 I think there was one guy who said he tore his ACL and they had him doing

Speaker 1 single leg strength exercises five months later. And he's like, it still hasn't sat right with me.
That shit is like real shit that free agents definitely should pay attention to.

Speaker 1 They talk to each other also about that. The guys are like, yeah, you don't want to go here.
They don't care about your health. Right.
I think Matthew Judon says, like,

Speaker 1 I told my friends on the Ravens that they should fire their strength coach like two years ago. Who is this guy? We got to fucking find him.
He seems kind of awesome. He probably would kick our ass.

Speaker 1 He's probably like the best. Oh, if we met him, we'd be like this guy rules.
Football guy. I would run through a brick wall for this guy.

Speaker 1 And that's probably something that he has you do when you're rehabbing from a concussion. Yeah.
All right. Other sports.

Speaker 1 Big story in the NFL. Jerry Richardson passed away.
Oh, yeah. RIP.
I am wearing jeans for Jeans Friday

Speaker 1 in his honor. Yes.
So he's out. And then another Jerry.
He's fully out. Fully out.

Speaker 1 Fully out. Very interesting way to talk about someone who just died.
He's out. Out.

Speaker 1 Dead. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Jerry Jones has a lawsuit that's just been reinstated against him for grabbing a woman in his box and then forcing her to kiss him. And that got thrown out a while ago.
Now it's back in.

Speaker 1 I'm going to say that happened.

Speaker 1 I've seen enough. If I were the judge, I'd be like, wait, Jerry Jones grabbed a woman in his box to try.
Yep, that happened. It allegedly definitely happened.

Speaker 1 And Jerry, at this point, should just have a sign-up.

Speaker 1 You know, when you go into a place where they're filming a TV show, it just should say, like, by entering this suite, you consent to being grabbed or having an 80-year-old suck on your face for a couple minutes.

Speaker 1 Or

Speaker 1 that takes like legal work. You need a lawyer to set that up.
Just have a sign outside of his suite that just says kissing booth. Yeah, kissing booth.
You can't, I mean, that's legally binding.

Speaker 1 By go into a kissing booth or maybe just line the entire ceiling with mistletoe. By, yeah.
Like there's nothing that they can do about that. I like that.

Speaker 1 By entering the premises, you agreed to be softly mauled by a billionaire. Smooched.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 I do want to shout out Stephen A. Smith.
He pretended to take a nap today on First Take when they were talking about Aaron Rodgers. I stand with Stephen A.
Smith.

Speaker 1 I'm sick of talking about Aaron Rodgers. Okay.
So that's my Aaron Rodgers update. It's just like, dude, stop holding everyone hostage.
Yeah, he was, he really hammed it up.

Speaker 1 Like, he was snoring, like, fully out. He's like, sorry, I don't really care about this anymore.
How awesome would it be if just no team wanted Aaron Rodgers next year? It would be great.

Speaker 1 It would be great. They should band together.
The owners should form a union. Yeah.
I guess that is the NFL. Yeah.

Speaker 1 All right. Other sports.
LeBron is pretty much done. Three weeks.
Three weeks will be re-evaluated. He's got a tendon issue in his ankle.
So we're down to nine important games for LeBron. Yeah, he's.

Speaker 1 It's this Lakers season is over. Well, what if the Lakers got good without LeBron? They could.
Do you think he LeBron would hate that? Oh, yeah. Absolutely.

Speaker 1 He would absolutely hate that. Kevin Durant's back.
Looks good. Fully back.
Sons are going to be a problem. Circle that until Chris Paul and Kevin Durant get injured again.
They're a problem.

Speaker 1 They're going to be the best,

Speaker 1 like, woulda, shoulda team if they don't win the title. Like, man, if they didn't get injured.
They're going to win, though. They're going to win.

Speaker 1 They're definitely going to win the title. This is the year for Chris Paul.
No, you don't think so, Hank? You don't know about it. You're back in first.
Yeah. Nice.
Congratulations.

Speaker 1 So, one day out of first place. That was a long, long day.
That was the longest day of your life. Oh, there was also something else that came out of Mike McCarthy's press conference.

Speaker 1 He said that him and Kellen Moore had conflicting opinions on how to run Hank's Cowboys last year, how to run the offense. Kellen Moore wanted to score points, as many points as possible.

Speaker 1 And Mike McCarthy said, not always are points good. You need to be able to run the ball.

Speaker 1 He even said, run the damn ball.

Speaker 1 He said, I wanted to run the damn ball, and Kellen Moore wanted to score points in this office. That's a translation, Mike McCarthy saving his job with Jerry Jones.
Oh, for sure.

Speaker 1 Because Jerry Jones paid Ezekiel Elliott a lot of money and was like, we need to run the ball. Yeah, he said Mike McCarthy thought the Cowboys' problem was they scored too many points.

Speaker 1 It could be. Sometimes you score too many points.
He was saying it under the guise of, I wanted to rest my defense a little bit more often. Yeah.

Speaker 1 But Mike McCarthy, I mean, for being such a, you know, he's like a die-hard analytics guy. Yeah, PFF.
He spent like

Speaker 1 he spent $9.99 a month on his profile. No, no, no, no.
He, oh, dude, he definitely went the $19.99. He went premium? Yeah.
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
So he's a big numbers guy, right?

Speaker 1 That would be funny, though, if he didn't go premium and he just tried to guess because, you know, how they locked premium. Yeah.
They lock like the grades.

Speaker 1 And he was like, well, I think this might be the ranking.

Speaker 1 He just uses incognito mode.

Speaker 1 He's got like three different phones that he can open up. And that's why the Cowboys tail off at the end of the season because he's used all his free articles.
Yes, yes, that's exactly what happened.

Speaker 1 That's probably what happened. But

Speaker 1 it is funny to hear Mike McCarthy be like, our problem was Kellen Moore was too focused on scoring points. Yeah, well, no shit, Mike.
He's the offensive coordinator. Yeah.

Speaker 1 All right. So the other thing I had was a dude's rock moment that I told you about last night, PFT.

Speaker 1 Illinois Matthew Mayer

Speaker 1 was out with caffeine poisoning. So he said he drank five monster energy drinks while playing video games on Sunday after the Ohio State game.

Speaker 1 And his first day of practice, pack of practice, was Wednesday. That's just a total dude's rock.
That's a long, long time to miss with caffeine.

Speaker 1 I mean, he just, he just fucking got locked into a game. He got what are you going to do? He got really hyper.
Yeah. And then

Speaker 1 he have like heart palpitations. It is funny.
You got to go to the hospital, get rehydrated. What do you do if you have caffeine poisoning?

Speaker 1 Because a lot of these like dumb injuries, like the baseball dumb injuries, I'm always like,

Speaker 1 why would you even admit it, right? But this one, you should admit, because I think everyone stands with him.

Speaker 1 It's like, all right, dude, if you're gaming and you're doing well, and you got to stay up, five rock star energy. He's referred to it as a heated gaming moment.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 I think that, isn't that what Myers Leonard said about his little

Speaker 1 snap food?

Speaker 1 Myrs Leonard kind of back. Yeah, where is he? He signed a 10-day, maybe with the Bucs.
Oh, I was going to say jazz would have been good. Yeah.
Oh, they would have loved him.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that would have been a good place.

Speaker 1 Maybe with the Bucs. Myers Leonardo Also, Illinois.
Yeah, team up with Bucs. Team up with Kyrie.
Scumbags. Yeah.

Speaker 1 All right, anything else that we missed?

Speaker 1 Let's see. No, that's it.
We literally covered everything in sports. Everything in sports.
Oh, Conference Tournament Week is coming, and it's already happening. Shout out.

Speaker 1 This is also Peter Schrager, I think, reported this.

Speaker 1 Iowa State pass rusher Will McDonald IV, I think that's how Roman numerals work, IV, came down with a fever close to 104 degrees on Tuesday evening.

Speaker 1 He's insisting on working out today despite still being sick and losing weight over the past 48 hours.

Speaker 1 That's a very high fever. Yeah.
But also like Iowa State Pass Rusher insists on practicing through fever. I'm sold.
Yeah. I've seen everything I need to see.
High motor guy.

Speaker 1 That's all like, I mean, the Bears

Speaker 1 entire draft strategy is they have a hotel suite with ping pong. darts and like pool and they're just testing everyone's competitiveness.
And putt-putt. Yeah.
They have putt-putt.

Speaker 1 I would would prefer a guy that's not great at putt-putt. Yeah, but that's actually one of those sneaky ones where it's like, if this guy's lights out at putt-putt, kind of a creep.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but just compete. Just see how they compete.
Compete, compete, compete, compete. It does seem like small stream stadium.
Yeah, it does.

Speaker 1 That'd be funny if we actually, if we were, if we were GMs of a team and we were drafting players, to have them play

Speaker 1 Jenga versus Frank the Tank would be the ultimate test of their mental toughness. Yeah, if you can stay in touch.
If you can stay focused when that's happening, The War 54. Yeah, I would

Speaker 1 pay good money to see that actually. Yes, yes, that would be incredible.
And have Frank just come up with songs for him. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I would do the thing where it's like I would, the lions that don't concern themselves with the opinion of sheep, I would actually have that. I would have the sheep

Speaker 1 in my interview room and see if they paid attention to it. Yes, yes, absolutely.

Speaker 1 All right, let's get Shefty. It was a wild ride.
Let's just say that. It was a wild ride.

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Speaker 1 Okay, we now welcome on a very special guest. It is an annual tradition.
We're in Indianapolis for the NFL Combine, and we always have Adam Schefter on the show. Shefty,

Speaker 1 where the fuck is the des tape? Let's just start. Let's just get right back into it.
Where's the des tape? We'll do this every year for the next 25 years, and I'll be like, give me the des tape.

Speaker 1 And you'd be like, well, guess what? I don't have it.

Speaker 4 It still hasn't surfaced yet.

Speaker 1 Okay, all right. It still hasn't surfaced.
That's a bad surface. Excellent use of the passive voice there.
Why has it not surfaced yet? You have it in one of those two phones.

Speaker 4 It's sort of like one of these tapes that's like missing underwater at sea and will one day surface.

Speaker 4 I was just thinking that I met Sam Ponder's mom at the Super Bowl. She was on the set the last day.

Speaker 4 She's an archaeologist.

Speaker 1 So she'll find it for us.

Speaker 4 She was telling me that they uncovered something in Israel, in Israel, where she spent six months of the year, some stones and rocks from prehistoric times that proved that certain people

Speaker 1 she may have. Yeah, that's a lot of people.
That's probably how she found the 2013 episode of Barstool Pickup.

Speaker 1 That's exactly what happened. God damn it.

Speaker 4 Now, let me also say this. What's also funny is I have my own podcast.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 4 I don't think I've ever been stopped by anybody to this day having that podcast for five years who said to me, hey, Adam, really like your podcast.

Speaker 1 But I've been stopped innumerable times by people who say, hey, heard you on PMT, love you on PMT. I love that.
How does that happen? That's our favorite thing that we hear. Because that's the best.

Speaker 4 It's so true.

Speaker 1 Now we have you trapped now. That is the thing.
Our fans are our best

Speaker 1 publicity because when they do that and they reaffirm to people, it's like, yeah, that was fun. Those guys are fun.

Speaker 4 I've never had anybody stop me and say, i really enjoy your podcast

Speaker 4 never once yeah shea will do that yes but um how are you doing how's it how like we're gonna get into everything but give us a quick state of the league what's the what's the buzz what's going on in indy well everything is being held up right now by the quarterback in green bay yep but he's out of the darkness once that happens he's the first quarterback domino then all the other quarterback dominoes begin to fall we're waiting on rogers we're waiting on derek carr who's here in india himself lamar jackson yep um

Speaker 4 We got a bunch of quarterbacks, right?

Speaker 4 Nathan Peterman. Nathan Peterman, Blake Bortles.

Speaker 1 Heineke.

Speaker 4 Heineke.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Bortles retired. Did you report that? Oh, no, that was us.
We broke you. We broke.

Speaker 1 You guys are the Blake Bortles whisperers.

Speaker 4 You guys are the ones that are on that. I'm not going to try to compete.

Speaker 4 Scenario that I had no luck, no shot of competing in.

Speaker 1 As far as Aaron Rodgers goes, I remember way, way back in the day, old school journalism,

Speaker 1 Dan Rather went on the air and he took heroin on the air to describe what it's like because of this new epidemic. Did Dan Rather do that? He did heroin on the air, yeah, on the radio.

Speaker 1 He had a sheriff that locked him in a dark room, administered to it, then he described the effects on the air.

Speaker 1 In order to get in Aaron Rodgers' brain, would you ever drink ayahuasca tea and then try to predict what he was going to do?

Speaker 4 Well, I would say this. I know people were discussing that darkness retreat.

Speaker 1 I would love.

Speaker 4 to go on a darkness retreat. That's what we said.

Speaker 4 Like, honestly, you're the father of two kids. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Right? You got a third grade.

Speaker 4 It'd be great. How many kids you have, PFT?

Speaker 1 Zero, except for my fictional son, Chris. He's four years old.
He loves to live tour. Well, there you go.
Okay, well, anyway,

Speaker 4 you would know what it would be like to escape Chris.

Speaker 1 The idea of...

Speaker 4 He's a piece of shit.

Speaker 4 What an asshole.

Speaker 4 The idea of going into darkness for four days.

Speaker 1 Yes. That's what I said.
You would get stressed out, though. You would.
Yeah.

Speaker 4 No, because there's an understanding. You're going in for four days.
You're going in for four days, and it's like no phones.

Speaker 1 Worst four days for you to go in.

Speaker 1 Well, on the calendar year.

Speaker 4 It would be the week of free agency. Free agency.
Without question.

Speaker 1 No question.

Speaker 4 Yeah. You know, a couple of years ago, a few years ago, I was invited to the Masters for the first time.
And my friends invited me down. I went down there.

Speaker 4 And I was like, it was right towards the end of the pandemic. I hadn't traveled at all.
It was the first trip.

Speaker 4 Fly down there. And it was really hard to leave your family at that time.
Hard thing to do, leave work behind. They said, I'm going to go to the chorus.

Speaker 4 I said, okay, Greg, leave your phones at the house.

Speaker 1 I'm like, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. What? Yeah, you were like the scene in Donnie Brasco when he wouldn't take his boots off.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

Speaker 4 They said, we weren't going to tell you that in advance because we knew that that would make you not make this trip. Yeah.

Speaker 4 So you would leave your phone for three days at the masters. Literally nothing, no access.
And when that first happens, what you find is that you're sticking your hand in your pocket.

Speaker 4 It's like someone trying to quit cigarettes, I I would imagine. You get the shakes, like you're reaching into your

Speaker 1 phantom vibrations on your leg, and you think your phone is going off, but you don't even have your phone.

Speaker 4 Exactly. Exactly.
It was a very weird sensation. But to go into darkness for four days, no phones, you do it.
I like it.

Speaker 1 So what's the latest, though? It feels like Aaron Rodgers is not going to be on the Packers next year. Is that a fair assessment?

Speaker 4 You know, here's the thing. This has been going on now for three years.
Right. And I would have thought two years ago that he wasn't going to be on the Packers that year.

Speaker 4 And the two sides circled back, and all of a sudden he shows up at training camp. But then last year, there really wasn't a lot of talk about it.
They get the contract extension done. He stays.

Speaker 4 And then this year, there seems to be more and more smoke to the fire. And it's remarkably similar.
how much his case is like Brett Favre's case.

Speaker 4 Same age, like same years.

Speaker 4 And it's almost like history repeating repeating itself.

Speaker 4 He ultimately has to be the one that's going to break up with them. And I think there are people around the league who believe that they, the Packers,

Speaker 4 are perfectly fine with that. Yeah.
Here's the thing. You got two quarterbacks there.
So if Rodgers says, I want to come back, guess what? Now we're going to spring a leak on Jordan Love. Right.

Speaker 4 Like, is Jordan Love going to want to be there? Right. So somebody.
doesn't fit in Green Bay. Right.

Speaker 4 We're just waiting for the man to emerge from the darkness to tell us which quarterback that's going to be.

Speaker 1 You don't think think that there's a world where the Packers tell Aaron Rodgers like straight up,

Speaker 1 it's probably best if we split ways. They're doing all the waiting and Aaron's doing all the deciding.

Speaker 4 But they could do that, but why wouldn't they have done it already? They seem to be waiting. It almost is, to me, it's like both sides are passive-aggressive about this.

Speaker 4 Both sides seem to want to break up, but nobody's willing to be the one to break up.

Speaker 4 I remember a couple of years ago, it felt to me, it just felt to me like he was the one that wanted out, but he didn't want to say, I want out because he didn't want to be the one that was being blamed for ending that relationship.

Speaker 1 He didn't want to be Brett Favre. Right.
Because he came into the league behind Brett Favre. He saw what Brett was doing.
He's like, I'm never going to be this ass.

Speaker 1 It's like when he grew up saying, I'm not going to be like my dad. It's cats in the cradle.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 And then some days played out after I had my son, which was the meanest thing that's anyone ever played.

Speaker 1 One day you start mispronouncing words like your dad did. You start doing things.
He's doing stuff like Brett Favre did. So now he's going.

Speaker 1 Is this your way of saying he's going to go to the Jets?

Speaker 4 Well, to me, that is the one that makes the most sense by far.

Speaker 4 If he is going to be traded, that's the place it would be.

Speaker 1 Give us an off-the-radar one that people aren't thinking about.

Speaker 4 With Rodgers? Yes.

Speaker 1 Because, you know, we've heard Jets. I think some people have float around, maybe Raiders.

Speaker 4 I think the Panthers have checked in.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 That would be interesting.

Speaker 4 They would be a good team. But I don't think the Packers want to send him in the NFC.
Yeah. So now we're back to the AFC.

Speaker 1 But wouldn't they want to send him in the NFC? Because he's not good in the NFC playoffs. So, like it's actually a bonus.
Like, hey, if we play him in the NFC Championship, we're going to win.

Speaker 4 That would be one way of looking at it.

Speaker 4 But when you think about the NFC South for one moment, all these teams that are looking to get a new quarterback, if somebody trades up for one, somebody signs one, somebody trades for one, wherever it is, there's a real opportunity there.

Speaker 1 We got Kyle Trask in Tampa, Desmond Regardlino, in Atlanta. Aren't they giving Kyle Trask free reign to interview new coaches?

Speaker 4 They want his input on that. They wanted his input when they hired Dave Canalis.

Speaker 1 The affordable score name.

Speaker 4 He had Kyle Trash blessing on that.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so Stephen Shea is in the room right now, and when you said the words NFC South,

Speaker 1 I'm not kidding. He was in the middle of a bite, and he froze his hands and wouldn't move until you figured out.

Speaker 4 Well, here's the thing: he could look forward to Kyle Trash being his quarterback.

Speaker 1 No, he already has. He's already talked himself into it.

Speaker 1 And then, I mean, are the Saints going to run back?

Speaker 1 Is Jameis on in contract?

Speaker 4 He's under contract right now. There's a cap savings if they move on there.
They've checked in with Derek Carr.

Speaker 4 Obviously, they had enough interest there that they brought him into New Orleans, have met with him at the combine. So clearly they're looking to add to the position.

Speaker 4 Carolina, we don't know who's playing there. So literally, there is a quarterback question with every team in that except Tampa where we know college.

Speaker 1 And so you're saying once Aaron Rodgers makes the decision, then we'll see all these other guys.

Speaker 4 Now, Derek Carr could always say, you know what, I'm not waiting for Aaron Rodgers anymore. But I think that Aaron Rodgers is the first QB domino.

Speaker 4 I think once he decides, well, now look, this could blow up, right? By the time you run this podcast,

Speaker 1 that would be so funny if you were so wrong. Yeah, you'd have to look like a total fool.

Speaker 4 It wouldn't be the first time.

Speaker 1 Congrats on being the first on Tom Brady's retirement. Yeah, by about exactly one year.
So you nailed it. I have a theory.
Yeah, I have a theory about that.

Speaker 1 You had it again this year, but you didn't want to become the ire of all this hate.

Speaker 4 You know, it's funny. There was a night where we were driving back from my first encounter with Mr.
Che over there in Tampa. It was in December.
We were going back to the hotel.

Speaker 4 I was with Larry Fixgill. We walked into the lobby of the hotel there where the Brady's, the parents, always stayed.
And Larry knows the parents very well.

Speaker 4 And so they come over and they say, this is Adam Schefter.

Speaker 4 Hey, Mr. Brady, how you doing?

Speaker 4 So we had the chance to talk then. There was no mention about anything at the moment.

Speaker 1 They probably don't like you.

Speaker 4 You know what? He was very pleasant and enjoyable to talk to. He did not bring it up.

Speaker 1 But did you have it this year? You had it this year. I think you had it.
No. And you were like, I'm not going to do this again.
No, I don't.

Speaker 1 We're going to let let this guy retire on his own terms and not try to cock me into it. No, but clearly

Speaker 4 he wanted to do it his way this year because it happened so quick. I'm like driving my daughter to school.
Tom Brady just retired again. One year.
Wow, that was quick.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Again.
He probably had that timed out. Knowing him, he's like, all right, chefs are taking away.

Speaker 4 Well, and the second way,

Speaker 1 the funny part was we go back to Tampa.

Speaker 4 We go back to Tampa for the playoff game. And I'm going back with Susie Colbert.
And we get to the elevator after the game. And who gets into the elevator that night? Tom Brady's parents.

Speaker 4 Again, second time, same hotel, almost like the same schedule.

Speaker 1 They're following you. Yeah.
That's how they know when you're taking your daughter to the house. I think it's the other way around.
I think Brady's parents were like shifters onto you again.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but the great part is

Speaker 1 he's showing up in all these places.

Speaker 4 We said, sorry about the game. He said, yeah.
And Mr. Brady said, yeah, well,

Speaker 4 it was a hell of a way to end.

Speaker 1 If

Speaker 4 that's the way it ends.

Speaker 1 He caught himself right away.

Speaker 4 And I said, don't worry, Mr. Brady.
We're going to leave you alone this year. We don't want anything.

Speaker 1 Now, do you count the first retirement of Tom Brady? That's a mark on your record because he didn't fully retire. I got a lot of marks on your record.
Yeah, no, but that one, that one,

Speaker 1 we count that against you, right? If we're doing a full tally, because I think that will just be your obituary someday, hopefully a long time from now.

Speaker 1 It will just be the ones you got right and ones you got right.

Speaker 4 I would prefer that you give the mark to Jeff Darlington, but that's just me.

Speaker 4 Yeah.

Speaker 1 How does that work when you're doing

Speaker 1 you're doing a co-scoop with somebody like that, and it's like per Jeff Darlington and me.

Speaker 1 How do you guys both put out a scoop at the same time?

Speaker 4 Well, in that particular case, last year.

Speaker 1 Oh,

Speaker 1 and yeah, go ahead. Go for it.
What is it?

Speaker 1 Hold on a second.

Speaker 1 Announce Lamar Jackson and the Commanders. He's pranking us.

Speaker 4 He's pranking us.

Speaker 1 Let me see it. Hold on.
Okay. Announces from Dan Snyder.

Speaker 4 No one's allowed to tweet, right?

Speaker 1 Yeah, Dan Snyder just said,

Speaker 1 hey, thank you so much for sending us that first draft. There's no way.
It's good to go. Hold on, hold on.
Hold on. There's no fucking way this is real.
You're setting up. We're not going to run this.

Speaker 1 No one's allowed to tweet.

Speaker 1 What does it say?

Speaker 1 This is a setup. This will be awesome.
This is a setup.

Speaker 1 I'm being set up. I said just a little bit.
Are you in on this? No.

Speaker 1 It's something about Lamar Jackson. We don't say who sent it.

Speaker 1 Well, I'm not going to say who sent it, but if this is true... We show the person, right? You show the person.

Speaker 1 Just a heads up.

Speaker 4 Just a little heads up, this deal. We could say it now.

Speaker 1 It's coming out Friday. Okay.
And if you tell us, we'll edit it out.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 4 But no tweeting, right? No tweeting.

Speaker 1 No tweeting.

Speaker 1 we know everyone in this room we're in lockdown steven's showing his hands we don't need to see your hands steven

Speaker 4 just a little heads up this deal with washing lamar is starting to pick up oh with what they're offering it's now looking like it'll get agreed to tonight someone here will keep you posted when it's about to be finalized want you to be ready talk soon oh man this is not real this is not real he's your setup this is set up this is setting up we set you up with colin kaepernick when you first came on our show years we tried to check you out.

Speaker 1 This is a lie.

Speaker 1 You fucked me on Carson Winch last year.

Speaker 4 Yeah, but you fucked me. You gave me Carson Winch.

Speaker 1 I contracted Carson Winch. You're still saying Justin Finch.
No, no, no, no. Wait, wait, wait, wait.
I respond.

Speaker 4 Yeah, hold on. What should we respond?

Speaker 1 Like, I'm with the PMT guys. They don't believe it.
Say, yeah.

Speaker 1 Say, yeah,

Speaker 1 PMT broke this three months ago out of wishful thinking.

Speaker 1 I don't think he's replying any of that. This isn't real.
This isn't real. I mean, it would be an all-time moment if it is real.
It's not real. Because he.

Speaker 1 Hey, PST, let me be the first to congratulate you. He remembered that last year.

Speaker 4 You remember you guys, they don't believe it.

Speaker 1 Here we go. Ready? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Wait.

Speaker 1 I would like to be the first to congratulate you. Just a gradual.
You would not send that to him if you would not want him to know that we knew. Okay.

Speaker 1 I'm seeing there's nothing

Speaker 1 about the past.

Speaker 1 I'm looking. I'm looking.
I'm looking. I'm looking.
I'm looking.

Speaker 1 It's not. It's not.

Speaker 1 Grab Shafter. It's not him.

Speaker 1 This is a setup.

Speaker 4 I got bubbles. I got bubbles.
I got bubbles.

Speaker 1 I got bubbles. I am not.
What bullshitting? Oh, shit. In Rapperport just tweeted about that.

Speaker 4 Hold on. Bubbles.

Speaker 1 Bubbles. Bubbles.

Speaker 1 PFT. I was the first to congratulate you.

Speaker 1 It's not a sub. No, no.
It's not real. I want it on the rapids.
It's not real. It's not real.
It's not real. And Hank, you are so wrong.
It's not real. You are so wrong, Hank.
It's not real.

Speaker 1 There's a lot of bubbles. About Lamar going to Washington.
Have you seen the Photoshops that we've done? Did that have anything to do with it? Okay, Hood.

Speaker 1 Not sure if God doesn't say anything like this. All right, we probably shouldn't say all this.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 All right. It looks that doesn't look like it could be fake.

Speaker 1 Oh, no. He said, who about the PMT guys? Oh, shit.
We have your number. Chef D.

Speaker 1 Beyond. Hold on, hold on, hold on.
Is that real?

Speaker 1 Because this exact scenario is coming down. My fan fiction that I read.

Speaker 4 Damn. Did I tell you about Carson Wentz last year? Yes.

Speaker 1 You did, and you're a piece of shit for it. You ruined my year.

Speaker 4 And you want to read that? I mean, you read read that. This is not real.

Speaker 1 Oh, we see it.

Speaker 1 Now. It's not real.
All right, okay. So what are you going to do for this? What do you do with this information? Because if this breaks before the podcast comes out, open all-time podcasts won't.

Speaker 1 So tell us what the next step is. Well, hopefully.
But what is your next step? Do you then go source it somewhere else? Or you just let it rip.

Speaker 1 I would let it rip.

Speaker 4 When I get done with the podcast,

Speaker 4 I will call this gentleman.

Speaker 1 Do you want to take a break?

Speaker 4 No.

Speaker 1 So this is why it's not.

Speaker 4 Because he says it's coming in tonight.

Speaker 1 Okay, yeah. Here's why it's not real.
Because you would be on Twitter right now firing. No, because he's not coming to.

Speaker 4 He can't say anything right now.

Speaker 1 He was getting a heads up.

Speaker 4 He said just a heads up.

Speaker 1 Adam, do you swear to God?

Speaker 4 I swear to you. Look.

Speaker 1 Oh, you didn't swear to God.

Speaker 4 What does swear to God mean?

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah. You're not going to swear to God.
I swear to God. You're not swearing to God.

Speaker 4 Let's read the second text.

Speaker 1 That really hurt, though.

Speaker 4 The second text. Hold on.

Speaker 4 He says, not sure I've seen anything like this. As it heated up, Dan Snyder jumped in to take it to the finish line by adding another first-round pick and fully guaranteeing six years.

Speaker 1 I mean, I would love that.

Speaker 4 He has to be viewing this as his last move in Washington before he sells. That's how it looks to me.
We'll be back in touch soon. Please keep it quiet for now until this is all done.

Speaker 1 If this is a prank, this is the meanest thing that

Speaker 1 you have made a very powerful enemy. Wow.
You know what I'm going to do? If this is a prank, you always. I'm bringing back my dead dog, Leroy, and he's going to beat you

Speaker 1 to every scoop possible. I've been out of the scoop game for a while.

Speaker 4 I have five dogs, and they have Leroy Envy.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I bet they do, because Leroy is a great boy. Listen.
But this is mean. This is mean.
This is in history, though.

Speaker 1 If this ends up happening, Shefty, we owe you.

Speaker 1 You brought the goods.

Speaker 4 Literally unfolding as we're sitting here. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Holy shit.

Speaker 1 Now I'm just happy, but I'm also sad because I know that this is all fake. Yeah.
Like I'm 100% sure this is fake, but I'm still ecstatic about just imagining it happening. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay, all right. Let's do a palate cleanser.

Speaker 1 Have you stood next to Bryce Young yet? How tall is he?

Speaker 1 How tall is he? For real?

Speaker 4 They're saying six foot, right?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 4 Have you stood next to him? No.

Speaker 1 McShea said he's five, ten and a half and that he'd be scared to death of drafting him. But listen, if we could get used to that.

Speaker 4 Yeah, I heard McShea say that he was like a smallish Patrick Mahomes.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Minnie Mahomes is one of the things. Mini Mahomes, right?

Speaker 4 And like the Steph Curry of the NFL. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Because he played point guard as a kid. Steph Curry is also like 6'3 ⁇ , which is something that people are.

Speaker 4 But he was much shorter than everybody else in the league.

Speaker 1 True, true. Right.

Speaker 1 So, is he going to, what's he going to measure in at?

Speaker 4 My guess is 5'11.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 4 Get a couple weeks. Sounds like he's.
He's hired a nutritionist to put on extra weight. So maybe you come in 195, 200.

Speaker 1 You really don't need a nutritionist for that. You could hire us.

Speaker 4 You should start eating doughnuts, right?

Speaker 1 Yeah, pretty much.

Speaker 4 It's not that hard. Hey, with Big Ken on Saturday mornings.

Speaker 1 There's your team down. Couch, watch college basketball eat donuts.
I owe him 15 pounds. I want to jump back to maybe the best quarterback in the league.
We briefly glossed over him, Jameis Winston.

Speaker 1 We love Jameis. Dude, congratulations.
He's excited.

Speaker 1 Stop it. Just as a quick passion.
It's a big setup.

Speaker 1 Just because Steven's in the room doesn't mean everyone catches his gullibility.

Speaker 1 You and I are now lockstep. When people say that our quarterbacks are running backs, we've got to fucking just, we're like the Avengers.
Right, yeah, I guess I'm happy about it, but it's not real.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we just fucking go up. We just facebuck people who say they're running backs.

Speaker 4 How happy will you be when that deal is finalized?

Speaker 1 I will come. Yeah.

Speaker 1 No, seriously,

Speaker 1 I'm going to ejaculate. He will.
He will.

Speaker 1 It's not going to be sexual or anything. It's just my body's going to know how to do it.

Speaker 4 But they threw in an extra one, and they're guaranteeing six years now.

Speaker 1 That's fine.

Speaker 1 This is what makes me so suspicious, is because the way that you're presenting this right now is exactly how I laid it out in my fan fiction that Snyder is selling the team he would have no problem fucking over the next owner of the Washington Commanders while also giving a fully guaranteed contract to fuck over every other owner in the NFL and at the same time having it be his last legacy.

Speaker 4 Here's Lamar Jackson. But you're good with it.

Speaker 1 If it happens, I'm very good. How could you not be good with it? It's Lamar Jackson.

Speaker 4 So you envisioned the future and

Speaker 4 manifested it to happen.

Speaker 1 He did. Yeah, kids, use drugs occasionally.
Expand your brains. Now, here's the thing.

Speaker 1 We have on the table either an all-time moment of breaking news, even though it will already be broken by the time this comes out, or the greatest

Speaker 1 prank that has ever been pulled by a guy who I didn't think had it in him. And if that is the case, my hat's off to you, sir.

Speaker 1 I've decided for the rest of this interview to believe you just because it's way more fun living in that. That's my congratulations.
Yeah, thank you.

Speaker 1 I'm going to believe it because I want to believe it. Yeah.
It's huge. That explains a lot about the world.
It's huge. Jameis Winston, though.
So he's one of our favorite quarterbacks.

Speaker 1 What the hell happened last year? Our theory was that he got injured early on. Yep, he did.
And then the team somehow mismanaged his injury.

Speaker 1 They were afraid to put him back in as the season progressed because of something that was going on behind the scenes. Why did they stay with Andy Dalton? Why not Jameis last year?

Speaker 4 It's not going to be the answer you want. I think they liked Andy Dalton.
I think Andy Dalton is somebody that goes where he does, and people kind of like that guy.

Speaker 1 He's a nice guy. Nice.
Really nice guy.

Speaker 4 I think he's a better quarterback than people realize. I do.
I kind of like Andy Dalton as a quarterback. I do, too.
He could quarterback my team.

Speaker 1 Well,

Speaker 1 he's a nice guy.

Speaker 4 Do you like him in Chicago?

Speaker 1 He's a nice guy. I think we've said enough.
See, that year.

Speaker 4 He's a nice guy. He went to Chicago.
He should have gone to San Francisco. San Francisco is interested at that time.
That would have been a good move.

Speaker 4 And you would have seen that he was a better quarterback than people realize. So I just think that they started rolling with Dalton.
They kind of liked it.

Speaker 4 Never went back to your guy, Jameis. Okay.

Speaker 1 I don't like that, though, because Jameis, the league is more exciting when Jameis wins. He's playing quarterback.

Speaker 4 He's fun. Yeah.
He's fun.

Speaker 1 Let's talk about a very important subject. Sodgate.

Speaker 4 Isn't that amazing?

Speaker 1 I mean, you agree with me.

Speaker 4 As Mina Times dubbed it, turf wars.

Speaker 4 George Toma calling out the NFL.

Speaker 1 He threw everyone under the bus, bus, which makes me think he's even more responsible for what happened. I mean, that field, that was not, we should replay the Super Bowl.

Speaker 4 You know what's amazing?

Speaker 4 I think Philadelphia agrees. Yes.

Speaker 1 Philadelphia agrees. And I agree too.
I have no dog in this field. You are kind of running PR for him, though.
You're like for the sod father. You let him get his explanation out that they overwatch.

Speaker 1 You're doing propaganda

Speaker 1 for his little grass deal that he put out there.

Speaker 4 All I did was I posted to the article that ESPN posted with the guy that wrote it.

Speaker 1 That's all I did.

Speaker 4 And yet.

Speaker 1 Sounds like Kyrie's excuse.

Speaker 4 Yeah, exactly. Exactly.

Speaker 1 Well,

Speaker 4 you know, what was amazing to me is on Super Bowl Sunday, I'm watching the game with a few of my ESPN colleagues who played the game and know a lot more about it than I do.

Speaker 4 They picked up on the field within moments. Yeah.
They're all over the field. Randy Moss, Teddy Bruski, Matt Hasselback.
They're like, this field is horrendous. What's the deal?

Speaker 4 And the regular groundskeeper for the Cardinals, his last name is Levy.

Speaker 1 Okay, good, good.

Speaker 4 Regarded as one of the best

Speaker 4 Sod groundskeepers that there is in the league. And somehow George Tomer got involved, and now the field was overwatered.

Speaker 1 Overwater.

Speaker 4 And I think PFT's theory was exactly right.

Speaker 1 What?

Speaker 4 Nick Siriani's tears contributed to this.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah, that's true.

Speaker 1 He was leaking on the field.

Speaker 1 He wet him up.

Speaker 4 You can't cry that much on the field. And I expect that there's going to be no effect.

Speaker 1 Does the NFL see that as an issue, or are they just like, nah, it was good enough?

Speaker 4 Well, Well, I can tell you this much. That grass, they grow outside the stadium and they bring it in.

Speaker 4 Las Vegas also does it that way.

Speaker 4 Las Vegas is the side of the Super Bowl next year.

Speaker 4 I guarantee you that this is not going to be repeated next year, and they're going to make sure that that grass is not overwatered, that no head coaches are allowed to cry.

Speaker 4 The national anthem before is going to be a memo passed. They may vote on that at the owners' meetings this year.

Speaker 1 Just have a terrible national anthem. They have Fergie come out.

Speaker 4 Yeah, something that's upbeat and not as patriotic and as emotional as the version this year. And no crying.

Speaker 1 Yeah. No crying.
It was a great week for the Super Bowl. I heard you had a fantastic week leading up to the game.

Speaker 4 Let me tell you something. This was an unbelievable story.
So

Speaker 4 we finished, I finished doing the 6 o'clock Sports Center one night.

Speaker 1 Now, I never, never go out.

Speaker 4 Super Bowl week,

Speaker 4 like my wife has never seen me drunk to this day.

Speaker 4 She's a little annoyed by the whole thing.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 4 So I get a text right after the 6 o'clock Sports Center from PFT's friend Diana and Jeff Darlington. They're at a bar that's like two storefronts down from the set.
They said, come on by here.

Speaker 1 I'm like, okay.

Speaker 4 So we go there. One of my college buddies came by.
Four of us were sitting around there for two hours. Two hours that you would never expect to have.
Totally unplanned, totally spontaneous.

Speaker 4 We're in Old Town.

Speaker 1 We're a friendship. Yep.
Okay.

Speaker 1 I don't know what that is.

Speaker 4 What a novel concept to break out of my little shell into this world that's known as friendship.

Speaker 1 Wow. You go to a bar and have fun.

Speaker 4 I didn't know that this thing happens in life.

Speaker 1 Like to me, it's all darkness like Aaron Rodgers.

Speaker 4 But there was light. We had the upstairs.
We're drinking. Did you guys laugh?

Speaker 1 We had a great time.

Speaker 4 But here's the great part. Here's the great part.
So afterwards, we're going to go to my favorite, Houston's. I love Houston's.
And there's a lot of traffic, can't get Ubers.

Speaker 4 So they had these golf cart rides. that you could take wherever you want.

Speaker 4 Three rows. Jeff Darlington gets in the back row.
Me and Diana Rossini get in the middle row. And the driver gets in the front row.
We start driving down the main street out of Old Town.

Speaker 4 And this woman in a truck pulls up next to our golf cart. And she points at Jeff Darlington.
And she says, you.

Speaker 4 He said, me? He said, yeah.

Speaker 4 480-321-1968.

Speaker 1 And he said,

Speaker 4 what? And she said, that's my number. Why don't you come back with me tonight?

Speaker 1 Jeff Darlington.

Speaker 1 Jeff's like, I'm married.

Speaker 4 And she's like, that's your loss. She turns and points to our row, to Diana,

Speaker 1 and says, you,

Speaker 1 480-321-1968.

Speaker 4 And Diana got embarrassed, turns around.

Speaker 1 No, no, I'm married. No, no, no, no.

Speaker 4 No, thank you, ma'am. I'm not interested.
She rolls up her window and says, you're lost, and drives off.

Speaker 1 Oh, no. I'm sitting there.

Speaker 4 How do you think I felt about everybody in that golf cart except me got propositioned? Yeah, that's

Speaker 4 yeah.

Speaker 4 So it was a great night while we were out drinking at the bar. And then

Speaker 1 I got to tell you, you make it up to you.

Speaker 1 I mean, Jeff's free jacket.

Speaker 1 I might live stream it, actually.

Speaker 4 Jeff is a handsome guy. Yep.
Dan is a beautiful woman. The woman...
Didn't give two craps that I was in the middle of it.

Speaker 1 We'll work our way up there.

Speaker 4 So you know that I'm past my prime.

Speaker 1 Well, it's night one. You go out and you learn how to have drinks socially with people.

Speaker 1 Then night two, we'll work on the one-night stand later. Yeah.

Speaker 1 My wife will like that.

Speaker 1 She'll appreciate that.

Speaker 4 Yeah, but Jeff and Diana both got propositioned and hit on. That's an amazing situation.
And I didn't, and that's the way it goes.

Speaker 1 You're never going to go out with friends again. That's how it ends up.
You're like, this is why I don't go outside.

Speaker 4 Yeah, you go with friends that make you feel good, right?

Speaker 4 They made me feel bad.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 4 I'm mad about myself. Yeah.

Speaker 1 All right. Can we talk?

Speaker 4 So, yes, it was a very fun super. And I look forward to your live stream later.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's awesome. Yeah, show up.
Your live stream. Yeah, literally.

Speaker 1 If you build it, I will come.

Speaker 1 Can we talk about the number one pick real quick? Absolutely. All right, so I have a couple questions.
One is your tweet that was announcing the Bears are officially okay to trade this.

Speaker 1 That was a scheduled tweet, wasn't it? It happened exactly at 7 a.m. No.
You scheduled that tonight.

Speaker 4 No, because I... posted something right before that.
Jalen Carter, before he had trouble. No, I've never scheduled a tweet in my life.

Speaker 1 Ever? I don't even know how to do do it.

Speaker 4 Okay. Don't even know how to do it.

Speaker 1 Okay. Truly.
All right. Well, you should let us schedule the Lamar Jackson news for later tonight.

Speaker 4 We're going to have to start. As soon as this ends, we are writing up.
Okay, all right.

Speaker 1 He's going to be in on it.

Speaker 4 Tell me, closing in on finalizing it.

Speaker 1 Why don't you tell me when are you going to be able to break this?

Speaker 4 You see the technology.

Speaker 1 Can you imagine this is like the plot to speed in NFL circles? We get Adam Schefter's law.

Speaker 4 It's now looking like it'll get agreed to tonight. Okay.
Agreed to. They can't process it.

Speaker 1 I got to put a future in on the Commanders. No, you can't do that.
That's legal.

Speaker 4 Okay. It's now looking like it'll get agreed to tonight.
Keep you posted when it's about to be finalized.

Speaker 1 Just want you to be ready. Yeah, I won't put a future in because I don't want you to feel like we're using you for your information.
That's what I think. If you want to log on to

Speaker 4 that would be inside information.

Speaker 1 That would be insider

Speaker 4 training.

Speaker 1 Maybe a dime.

Speaker 1 Listen, if you're sarcastic. If this is real, you should let us log into your Twitter account and schedule a tweet at 7 p.m.
And it's like he has to get the news.

Speaker 4 But I'm not, I don't know what time it's going to be.

Speaker 1 Before the tweet goes off. Yeah.

Speaker 1 You know what would be awesome is if this whole thing was a ruse and we schedule that tweet and then you had to pull strings behind the scenes to make it to make it actually happen. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 To be right. Yes.
Have you ever influenced a trade?

Speaker 4 Influenced a trade? Yeah. Have you ever...
You know, you're always hearing all these things, so I don't know how I would have influenced one.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you don't ever pull like the parent trap thing where you call up the Jets and you're like, hey, I hear Aaron Rodgers really likes you. Call up Aaron Rodgers.

Speaker 1 Hey, I hear the Jets really like you. That sort of thing.
Match maker.

Speaker 4 Aaron hasn't returned my calls. Yeah, oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 So he called you out. What do you think about that? He called you out big time.
He's like, Shafter doesn't know shit about me. I know.
So you that's it's just how it goes.

Speaker 1 It's fine. Okay.

Speaker 4 It is what it is.

Speaker 1 I mean, he's a bad guy, so it's fine.

Speaker 1 Sorry, it's the number one pick. What are the Bears going to get for it?

Speaker 4 Well, you know what? The great part is you could trade if you wanted, maybe to two, and then go from two to four and four to six.

Speaker 1 But what I think,

Speaker 4 I think you want to be in the range where you are assured of getting either Will Anderson, and I would have said Jalen Carter, and I still think Jalen Carter, but let's see what happens legally now with this pending situation, tragic situation that killed two people in Georgia on January 15th.

Speaker 4 So

Speaker 4 you want to leave yourself in a position, if you're the Bears, to somehow come with one of those blue-chip players, if you can, and still get a bevy of drafts.

Speaker 1 So, what do you think they get? If they go one to four,

Speaker 1 do they get first-rounder next year? Oh, yeah. Second rounder this year.

Speaker 4 year well hold on first of all the niners went from 12 to three right and gave up three ones yep okay so to go from one to four

Speaker 4 it's a minimum of two ones and then some and then some

Speaker 4 like it's it's a lot like this is an unbelievable windfall yes for them that the Houston Texans allowed Davis Mills and Brandon Cooks to play on that.

Speaker 4 Brandon Cooks had over 100 yards of receptions against the

Speaker 4 I know Lovey Smith. See, the players, they're always going to play to win because they're trying to prove themselves in the contracts.
Yeah. Always.

Speaker 4 But the, I mean, somebody should have stepped in and said, what are we doing here? Yeah. Like, we're going to sit this guy.
We're going to sit that guy.

Speaker 1 No, no.

Speaker 4 I know you're going to try to win, and I wish you the best, but we're not going to try to win.

Speaker 1 It was the best day of my year.

Speaker 4 Oh, my God. Yeah.
It was unbelievable to watch that.

Speaker 1 That fourth down completion. Yeah.
Was it like fourth and 11? It made Max go bowl.

Speaker 4 It was incredible.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 He had to bowl for like eight hours and eat 14 hot dogs because of that. So it was great.

Speaker 1 You know what it reminded me of?

Speaker 4 It reminded me of the Jets going into Los Angeles a couple of years ago when they hadn't won a game yet.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 4 They were in the number one spot to be able to take Trevor Lawrence.

Speaker 4 They beat the Rams and fell out of the number one spot. They won't win two games down the stretch.
They won two games down the stretch, but that was the one that kind of got him rolling.

Speaker 4 And then Jacksonville jumped them. But the Jets will always have that big win in L.A.
to look back on as Trevor Lodge threw up.

Speaker 1 Yeah, the sliding doors are insane.

Speaker 1 Sliding doors, I mean.

Speaker 4 It's nuts to think about all of that. How about the Philadelphia Eagles last year tried to sign Allen Robinson during free agency?

Speaker 4 They thought they had a deal done. It fell apart.
He goes to Los Angeles, and they're stuck trading for A.J. Brown.
Pretty good. And Allen Robinson is in L.A.

Speaker 4 And how do you think the Rams feel about having Allen Robinson under contract? Yeah. $15 million guaranteed this year.

Speaker 1 Is Justin Fields definitely going to be the Bears starter next year?

Speaker 4 I expect him to be the starter. I don't know why that would be different.

Speaker 1 Well, I threw out the theory and I don't want this to happen, but could potentially, is there any smoke around the Bears potentially trading both the one and Justin Fields and getting all the draft picks?

Speaker 4 Well, I would argue the other way. If you're the Bears and you just stay in your spot and take a quarterback.

Speaker 1 But what if you don't like any of these guys? Bryce Young is 5'9.

Speaker 4 But, you know, quarterbacks

Speaker 4 are the most valuable commodities in all of sports. And do you remember, I think it was Jimmy Johnson.

Speaker 4 They had Troy Aikman, and they used their first pick in the supplemental draft on the Miami quarterback, Steve Walsh. And then eventually they traded Steve Walsh, I believe, to Minnesota.

Speaker 4 And so quarterbacks are something that are currency. So while we're talking about trading that pick for multiple ones and other draft goodies, you could take a quarterback, and if he is really good,

Speaker 4 you could look at both quarterbacks and trade one of the quarterbacks for a lot also. Like, it's just another way of thinking.
Do I think that's going to happen?

Speaker 1 No. No, I I want Justin Bridge to be the Bears quarterback.
I think he will be there. I just don't know.

Speaker 1 I think the Bears should keep everything open to try to maximize all of this.

Speaker 1 Because it is a once-in-a-lifetime situation to have the number one pick and also think you have your franchise quarterback.

Speaker 4 You would hope and you would think that they will never be in this position ever again.

Speaker 1 No, they probably will. Probably will this year.
That's

Speaker 1 what I'm saying. Are the Bears going to move to Arlington Heights?

Speaker 4 That sounds like it's fishing. Definitely have.

Speaker 1 Okay, definitely. Yeah, I mean, I think it's going to be.
Are you going to move to Arlington Heights? I will not.

Speaker 1 Listen, if they want to build us a fun factory out there, we'll go do we'll do stuff out there.

Speaker 4 We should do that when they're building the stadium.

Speaker 1 I don't think the Bears would do that for us, but it will happen, right? Like, it's going to happen. Because I'm thinking it's...

Speaker 4 I expect it to. Okay.

Speaker 1 All right, good. Thank you.
And if the quarter pick you will,

Speaker 1 dude, a new stadium is like everything. They play in a fucking rinky dink.
Soldier is beautiful by the lake, but it's not a good thing.

Speaker 4 It's a beautiful stadium.

Speaker 1 It's beautiful by the lake. Oh, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 4 But the stadium is kind of weird.

Speaker 1 No, it's the smallest stadium in the the NFL. The best part about Soldier Field is the overhead shots from the blimp.
When they show, like,

Speaker 1 here's where it's being played. It looks beautiful, right?

Speaker 4 Yeah. And you see Lincoln Park.
It's hard to get in.

Speaker 1 It's hard to get out.

Speaker 4 Is it Lincoln Park or Washington Park? No, there's Grant Park.

Speaker 1 Grant Park, Grant Park, Grant Park. Yeah.

Speaker 4 And the old stadium that they played in,

Speaker 4 that was beautiful looking.

Speaker 1 Which one? Oh, yeah, before they renovated it. Yeah, they basically put a spaceship on top of Soldier Field.

Speaker 4 That's exactly right. Soldier Field, in its initial construct, I thought was it was kind of, looked like a Roman Coliseum kind of thing.

Speaker 1 But it's time to modernize. It's like

Speaker 1 you can't have the smallest state in the NFL, especially if this team gets sold at some point.

Speaker 4 I remember being in graduate school and going to games at Soldier Field, seeing Barry Sanders tramp away from the school. Wait, where'd you go to graduate school?

Speaker 1 Northwestern.

Speaker 1 You know, they lost their accreditation. Yes, yeah.

Speaker 1 So no longer an actual journalism program.

Speaker 4 Well, that's the way it goes. It happens.

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Speaker 1 Who would you say is more influential on the Northwestern community? You or Darren Revelle? Darren Rovelle. Yeah, to a detriment.
All right, so speaking of college,

Speaker 1 your coach is going to just keep doing this every year, huh? Jim Harbaugh.

Speaker 4 Look, I think people will approach him, but I think after a while,

Speaker 4 he'll always be a desirable guy because he's a great coach. But I think at some point NFL teams say people went there and they just move on to the next guy.
That's my guess.

Speaker 4 So I think for the benefit of the Michigan football program, I think he's going to be at Michigan for a while. I think he's shown that he loves the school, loves the players.

Speaker 4 Like, even this year, ultimately, he couldn't pull himself away from it.

Speaker 4 There were people who thought he might. It just didn't happen.
And if he didn't do it last year in Minnesota, he didn't do it this year in Denver. Why is he going to do it next year for Team X?

Speaker 1 Right.

Speaker 4 And is that team next year going to be more or less likely after these two years to go after him?

Speaker 1 Yeah, he kind of has to.

Speaker 4 If he wins a national championship,

Speaker 4 he's going to be really hot. He's a great coach, and he'll always be attractive.
But I think the more these.

Speaker 1 The more time goes by, yeah, yeah. That makes sense.
He half-assed the whole flirting with the NFL process this year. I think he likes having the leverage.
He likes getting more money.

Speaker 1 But he did, what, like a Zoom interview with the Bronconians? For the Broncos? Yeah, to the campus. initially.

Speaker 1 Yeah. So did he do one in person as well? Yeah.
Oh, I didn't know that. I thought it was all done like remotely.
But that was close. So the Broncos end up going with Sean Payton.

Speaker 1 Sean Payton's going to come in and fix Russell Wilson. Is Russell Wilson fixable?

Speaker 4 I think Sean Payton thinks he is. You know, here's the thing.
These two guys have really liked and respected each other for a while. And,

Speaker 4 you know,

Speaker 4 they've wanted to be like, Sean Payton was the guy, no matter how many other candidates Denver went through, that Russell Wilson was praying for. Right.

Speaker 4 That was the guy he wanted. It would have been the guy that he would have handpicked at the beginning of the process.
And Sean Payton has always liked and respected Russell Wilson's game.

Speaker 4 And look, here's the deal. Russell's got a lot riding on the year, right? So if anybody's going to get it out of him, it's going to be Sean Payton.
And if Sean Payton can do it, then great.

Speaker 4 He gets Russell back to where he was. And if not, Then Russell's time in Denver probably won't be very long.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. And he'll be crazy if it ends that.

Speaker 4 And his quarterback coach is going to be Davis webb that that to me is the most bizarre part of this entire story well you know you know what's interesting last year buffalo wanted davis webb to be its quarterback coach and people have been touting this guy as a coach to be in training for a while now he wound up going to the giants to back up daniel jones started a game turned out to be a swan swong as a player and all of a sudden he goes into denver meets with sean payton.

Speaker 4 I don't know that Sean Payton was thinking that he was going to hire this guy. Like, there was no real connection.

Speaker 4 There were other people that had worked with Davis Webb, had trained with Davis Webb, knew what kind of guy he was.

Speaker 4 Sean Payton met him that one day, I believe it was a Friday, and was like, I'm hiring this guy. That's crazy.
And they hired him as the quarterback's coach.

Speaker 4 And I think in time, we'll see how it develops. Davis Webb will be an NFL head coach.
You know, be down the line. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 I mean, but that's so bizarre to go from being a backup quarterback that's objectively not very good.

Speaker 4 Who's younger by four or five years than the quarterback he's going to be coaching up?

Speaker 1 Yeah, so is Russell going to be able to to listen to this guy as a coach?

Speaker 4 Yeah, well, listen, again, I think Russell knows how much he's riding on this season. So, whether it's Davis Webb or Sean Payne, he's jealous of everyone.

Speaker 4 Yeah, like you got to address some things here. Like, last year didn't go the way that anybody wanted.
So, what can you do to be better? And if Davis Webb can help unlock some of that, great.

Speaker 1 Can I ask you just a serious question about the Commanders?

Speaker 1 And you can tell me, I guess,

Speaker 1 on a scale of whether I should go on continuing to live or whether I should just jump off the side of this building.

Speaker 1 Will Dan Snyder actually sell this team?

Speaker 4 I think he's going to sell the team.

Speaker 1 I don't.

Speaker 1 This is the best interview.

Speaker 4 You got Dan selling and you're getting anti-close.

Speaker 1 It's pretty. No, he's very good.
It's pretty good, right? So

Speaker 1 you're getting help.

Speaker 1 Let me move on to chair back. It's going to be like a Gallagher concert.
Watch out.

Speaker 1 But you actually think that he's going to sell the team.

Speaker 4 I do. That's my opinion.

Speaker 4 Like, I don't think you go down this road and have people touring the building and have as many people around the league looking at you in the way that you do with all these investigations and all these people.

Speaker 4 We know how the fans in Washington feel. Like, why does he want to stay around for that?

Speaker 1 Right. He's a sicko.

Speaker 4 Go take your $6.3 billion

Speaker 4 and go live in London.

Speaker 4 Go have a great life. Right? Like, what do you need that for? I don't know.
It's so tied up into his life and it's such an important thing.

Speaker 1 Yeah, the only thing is, like, if you have that much money, like, the only thing I'd want to do is buy an NFL team. Yeah.
And also, also, literally the only thing I'd want to do.

Speaker 1 If you have fuck you money, you need people to say fuck you to with it, right? And now he has a lot of people. He's gonna get that to everyone.

Speaker 1 So if he goes off, lives in London by himself, he has nobody to piss off. And I genuinely think that he likes pissing people off.
I think he's that miserable of a human being. Well,

Speaker 4 again, there's just too much smoke. You can't go down this road and think that it's not going to continue.

Speaker 4 Going that way. I think by the start of the new year, I think there's a new owner to go with your new quarterback.

Speaker 4 And maybe that's his little swan song.

Speaker 1 Yeah, absolutely. Yes.
I have to give you some credit.

Speaker 1 You did the shirtless Kirk Cousins chains. Yeah.
You didn't look that bad. I said it right away.
I was like, I want to make fun of Shefty because it's like almost like a knee-jerk reaction.

Speaker 1 You do something, assault, we make fun of you.

Speaker 1 But I saw it and I was like, you know what, Shefty, for his age. 56.
Yeah. 56? You look great to see you.
You look credible for 56. You looked awesome.
So

Speaker 4 credit to you. That's very, you know, the backstory with that is

Speaker 4 we do this Kamand Man meeting every Monday, 2 o'clock Eastern. Producer has some Kamand Mans picked out.
We go over them.

Speaker 4 They wanted to give the Kamand Man of Kirk Cousins to Robert Griffin III, his former teammate. We want you to do this.

Speaker 4 I remembered when Stevie Johnson with the Buffalo Bills caught a huge pass, game-winning pass,

Speaker 4 came out to the press conference, and he was wearing a white tank top.

Speaker 4 and Chris Carter that night had Stevie Johnson as the last come on man like Stevie Johnson you catch the game winning and this is how you come to the press conference This is how the country's gonna see you in this white tank top.

Speaker 4 What the hell are you doing? And they come out of it and there's Chris Carter in the same white tank top that Stevie Johnson's wearing. I always remember that.
It just was kind of cool.

Speaker 4 So when they told RG3, hey, we want you to do the Kirk Hussains. I'm like, RG3, you got to take your shirt off after and have the chains on.
And he's like, nah, nah, nah. Didn't want to do it.
Wow.

Speaker 4 And I was like, oh, I'm just telling you, I think you should do it. And he's like, let me call my wife.
Let me talk to her about it. And the answer came back, no, he didn't want to do it.

Speaker 4 So we're riding over to the stadium. And this is how high-level decisions are made at ESPN, right?

Speaker 4 We're riding over to the stadium, me and Denzel, the 22-year-old production assistant, and my producer, Matt Garrett. And I said to Garrett, Big Red, I said,

Speaker 4 Maybe I'll take my shirt off. And he goes, you do that? And I go,

Speaker 4 let me call the boss. So I call the boss Seth Park, and I'm like, what do you think about taking my my shirt off? He goes, ask Denzel.

Speaker 4 I go, Denzel, what do you think?

Speaker 1 He goes, absolutely.

Speaker 4 I said, let me call my wife. She said, absolutely.
So I'm like, all right, we'll try this. Now,

Speaker 4 people that work around the set, like Jess Krauss and Jody Brits, they wrangled up a bunch of chains, like real. Like, I had some valuable stuff on there.

Speaker 4 They gathered it together and we start the come on man and Robert Griffin III does that one and in the interim I'm on the field in the Mercedes Superdome and first of all it's freezing in there yeah like if you couldn't tell.

Speaker 4 Like, I'm just telling you. It was freezing in that.
I take my shirt off, and I knew that something was going to be a little bit off. Because when I took the shirt off, there was a band on the field.

Speaker 4 And it was almost like the music stopped.

Speaker 1 And everybody in the band is looking at me.

Speaker 4 And so

Speaker 4 I put all the chains on. We do it.

Speaker 4 I get my cell phone back. And within 30 seconds, there were 39 text messages.
Like, I had.

Speaker 4 Front office people that I would never hear from saying, I don't know what the hell you're doing, but I'm cracking up on my account.

Speaker 1 Like, seriously. It shows you're down.
That's like, that makes the story even better. You know, like, I'll do it.

Speaker 4 You take your job seriously, but you don't take yourself too seriously. Yeah, exactly.

Speaker 1 It was an improvement on the gritty from last year. Yeah, which is crazy.

Speaker 4 Well, listen, we like to have some fun. I'm usually the one that is up for some of this stuff.

Speaker 4 It's not really planned. Like, that was a spontaneous thing as we're on the way to the stadium.
It just kind of happened.

Speaker 1 Yeah. So, all right, we got a couple more questions because we know you got to break this news in a second.

Speaker 1 What's the big story that's coming up that we don't have our eyes on? I think you gave us one last year. Maybe there's

Speaker 1 mumblings going on. Something big that you could see coming.
Could be ownership, could be rules.

Speaker 4 Well, I think there are more teams for sale than just Washington.

Speaker 1 Oh, I like that.

Speaker 4 I think it's not just Washington. I think there are other teams that are sniffing around.
In the next couple of years,

Speaker 4 you'll see other teams move too.

Speaker 1 The Raiders.

Speaker 4 I don't know about that. The Bears.
But I don't know about that.

Speaker 1 Well,

Speaker 4 but they're going to have some issues at a certain point in time.

Speaker 1 Yes, yes. So with the Raiders, right?

Speaker 4 Yes. They might too.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Smart David. Famous.
Being able to afford the inheritance tax.

Speaker 1 The Seahawks.

Speaker 4 They sound like... Oh, you mean being sold? Yeah.

Speaker 4 I mean,

Speaker 4 there's been that speculation for a while. Jodi Allen has denied it, but that smoke has always been out there.

Speaker 4 We'll see.

Speaker 1 How about this one? How much longer do you think Roger Goodell? will be the commissioner of the NFL?

Speaker 4 That's a great question. I'll make a prediction.
That could be a bit. I I think he'll sign another extension.

Speaker 1 Oh. Oh, good.

Speaker 4 Okay.

Speaker 4 I think he'll sign another. That'd be my guess.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 It's just a guess. When is his contract up?

Speaker 4 I don't know the exact answer to that. Okay.
They kind of keep those things usually

Speaker 4 hush-hush. But I would think that.

Speaker 1 I mean, if I was Roger Goodell, I would never retire. No.
Like, you get paid $35 million a year or more. to just be a punching bag.
Yeah. He's a great punching bag.
He really is. He's very welcome.

Speaker 1 He really is. And I've heard that behind the scenes when he's not in front of a camera, that he can be a fun guy, that he's an affable guy with a personality and not the robot that we see.

Speaker 1 But his job is to be a robot and to just go out there and just take all the heat.

Speaker 4 Well, his job is to take care of the owners. Yeah.
His job is to look after the list 32 franchises, and he's done a pretty good job of that.

Speaker 1 You ever seen him let his hair down, have fun?

Speaker 4 Well, he's in a serious role. Yeah.
Yes. He's never taken his shirt off at the super bowl.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 If you were driving past Roger Goodell in Scottsdale, would you give him your number?

Speaker 4 That woman sure would.

Speaker 1 I won't forget that. Give it up for Chicago.

Speaker 6 Sebastian Maniscalco's new stand-up special, It Ain't Right, is coming to Hulu on November 21st.

Speaker 1 30 years ago, Jeff Bezos, complete nerd. Bezos now ripped to shreds on his super yacht, and the boxes keep coming.

Speaker 6 Sebastian Maniscalco, It Ain't Right, premieres November 21st, streaming on Hulu and Hulu on Disney Plus for bundle subscribers. Terms apply.

Speaker 1 Should we take that on the address? No, that's fine. By the way, that's become a thing now.

Speaker 4 When I'm on the road, I was at the Waste Management Open.

Speaker 4 I went out there that Saturday with Booger McFarlane and we're walking around and there were people actually saying, yelling out, take off your shirt.

Speaker 1 Take off your shirt. I love it.
I love it. Yeah, so the two things you get are love the on PMT

Speaker 4 and take off your shirt. And it will be, thanks for breaking the news.
So if I take off my shirt on PMT, then any best of all roles.

Speaker 1 Any good good commander's news that you ever break, if this actually happens, I want people to be like, Adam, thank you for making PFT come. Yeah, yes, that happened.
That happened.

Speaker 1 All right, last question. Give me a look, explain that one of the ways.
Last question. What is the most fun thing that Adam Schefter does?

Speaker 1 Could be a show, could be

Speaker 1 radio hit, could be, you know, breaking news, you know, investigating something.

Speaker 4 You know, my mother was on a podcast with Christian McCaffrey's

Speaker 4 mother, Lisa McCaffrey, who I've known since her husband Ed played in Denver. And my mother complained to Lisa on the podcast that

Speaker 4 I'm not any fun.

Speaker 4 And it was a little bit like the conversation I had with Scott Van Pelt, who I ran into at a dinner one night at the Super Bowl. We were talking about the jobs, and he's talking about you and Woge.

Speaker 4 And,

Speaker 4 you know,

Speaker 4 it is not a complaint. I love my job.
I'm unqualified to do anything else. But

Speaker 4 to let your guard down ever,

Speaker 4 that's why I go back to that night with Jeff and Diana for a couple hours, just sitting there unscripted, totally spontaneous, nothing about it planned, watching them get propositioned.

Speaker 4 That was a fun night.

Speaker 4 I don't really.

Speaker 4 And I don't mean this in a... No, this is genius.

Speaker 1 What he's discovered is that if you just live your life always on edge of breaking news and uptight all the time,

Speaker 1 two hours of friendship can be like the greatest experience of your life.

Speaker 4 Yeah, it's like going to the darkness for four hours.

Speaker 1 Yeah, right. So they're came into the light for two hours.
Those little moments?

Speaker 4 You know, I honestly.

Speaker 1 What about the pizza place?

Speaker 4 I love the pizza place.

Speaker 1 Don't you go to the pizza place?

Speaker 4 Yeah, but no, I don't go to Bristol anymore. So I don't stop there as much anymore.
And the guy that owned the pizza place passed away, and it's still really good, but I miss that guy.

Speaker 4 You know what's fun for me? Honestly, fantasy sports. Really? Fantasy basketball, fantasy golf.

Speaker 4 I love watching golf. I love watching those guys.
Your boy Max Homo. Yup.
You know, once called me P-Boy. That was like a great thrill for me.

Speaker 1 Wait, Max called you P-Boy? Yeah, he called me P-Boy. Just call him a choker back and say he's a choker.

Speaker 1 It's pretty good. Yeah, yeah.
I do like that you've discovered friendship, though. It's very cute.
That's cool. How many times a year do you think that you'll, like,

Speaker 1 how often do you want to repeat something like that to have a friend? Because I personally, I schedule usually Fridays and Saturdays and Sundays.

Speaker 4 Make it friend days.

Speaker 1 I hang out with my friends all the time. It's excellent.

Speaker 4 You know who my friends are?

Speaker 4 My dogs. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 4 Those are your best friends.

Speaker 4 Those dogs. Man's best friends.
In fact, you know, my wife, I'll show you something.

Speaker 4 This is us sleeping last night. I just want to show you this.
This is how we sleep at night.

Speaker 1 Oh, my God. Your dog's like on top of your face.
He's trying to kill you.

Speaker 4 She took pictures of yourself.

Speaker 1 Yeah, no, your dog's trying to kill you. Yeah, it's covering your nose.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Your dog was sent in by a rapid dog.

Speaker 4 So anyway, there's a bunch of that said.

Speaker 1 And also, I would imagine it's fun when you just completely cuck the NBA circles and break news there, too, right?

Speaker 1 Well,

Speaker 1 that's such a cheap thrill that you get to have where you're like, this isn't even my job. Boom, coming in.
You had one this year, didn't you? You had a big news.

Speaker 4 I've had a couple of insignificant NBA stories. Like, they're like the scraps that are left over at the dinner table that nobody else wants to eat, and I'll just eat them and be happy to do so.

Speaker 1 Do you get competitive about that? About NBA?

Speaker 4 Do you wish that you were breaking news? No, no, but no, no, but you know, here's the thing: we talk about friends, like Woge is my friend.

Speaker 4 There aren't many people who understand exactly what you go through. Like, literally, I'll call him.
He'll call me, like, you're not going to believe what's happening right now.

Speaker 4 Like, I'll call him afterwards, and I'll be like, you're not going to believe this. Like, Lamar, but we've already talked about it.
But, like, this Lamar thing, we're waiting on Low.

Speaker 4 Now we got to wait for the text to come in to say that it's getting done. But he and I will talk, he'll say to me all the time, like, oh, I'm waiting on this thing.

Speaker 4 It's getting close, but they're not done. And you know, and you're like, wait, you're like, watching.
Yeah, yeah. And

Speaker 4 your guard is always up. Your guard is always up.
And so when the guard is down, that's fun. That is fun.
That's fun. But that doesn't really happen till May, till June.

Speaker 1 Do you keep stats, like Uver's rap sheet?

Speaker 4 No, I don't keep stats.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he does. You don't?

Speaker 1 You don't notice that?

Speaker 1 He does. Yeah, he does.
Yep. Some people are not going to be able to do that.

Speaker 4 Back in the day,

Speaker 4 we used to have a fun thing called the Markman 50. One of my bosses, but we haven't done it in years where he would rank, like, he'd say, Okay, here are the top 50 free agents, and you'd score it.

Speaker 4 And then you just tally the scores who would get that free agent. It was just like a fun thing.

Speaker 4 And honestly, what would happen is there'd be some free agent who was sitting out there on April 18th, and I'm killing myself to get the news that

Speaker 4 Paris Campbell's signing with Indianapolis. And like, I'd, you know, my family wouldn't be talking to me because I'd be trying to get that final story.
Yeah.

Speaker 4 On April 18th, they're like, you know, you've been gone for seven, eight months. You're not present.
Like, can we let let up on number 49 on the Markman 50? So,

Speaker 4 in the benefit of everybody, we did way with the Markman 50.

Speaker 1 What if your daughter broke the Aaron Rodgers news?

Speaker 4 I would love that. It would give me great pleasure.

Speaker 1 There wouldn't be like a small percentage of you where you're like, God damn it, that should have been mine.

Speaker 4 You know what? Here's the thing. Like, when Tom Brady announces that he's retiring,

Speaker 4 first of all, great career, unbelievable. Everybody loved watching him.
Sad for the game, but also

Speaker 4 on that list, one listing I have to worry about.

Speaker 1 True. Yeah.

Speaker 1 It's a good point. Yeah.

Speaker 4 So, like, if Aaron Rodgers just wants to announce, like, fine. If he wants to, yeah.
We can get on with the rest of the quarterback dominoes and we move on. Yeah.

Speaker 1 That's a good way to look at it.

Speaker 1 All right. Well, Shefty, thank you as always.

Speaker 4 The third or fourth annual visit. Yes.
I appreciate you having me.

Speaker 1 Hopefully, this news becomes official because otherwise we're going to have to cut out like half this interview. Here's how sad this is.

Speaker 1 Even if it's completely made up, this has been the best hour of my year as a Washington Commanders fan. So thank you for giving me a bad thing.

Speaker 4 So if I ended the interview with one word,

Speaker 4 it would bum me out.

Speaker 1 Yeah,

Speaker 1 just put me out of my misery.

Speaker 4 Assault.

Speaker 1 Oh, that sucked.

Speaker 1 You got punked. Yeah, this is what's awesome.

Speaker 1 He's assaulted me. Adam has assaulted me.
All right. Thank you.

Speaker 4 Hey, you know who the culper was, by the way? Who?

Speaker 1 Oh, Ari.

Speaker 1 It was my sports update, Ari.

Speaker 1 Yeah, thank you, Adam. Thank you.
See you later. Bye, guys.

Speaker 1 Damn.

Speaker 1 I I didn't think you had that in you. Bye, guys.

Speaker 1 I knew it was fake, but I still loved it. Why did you have to say who to the PMT guys? Why'd you have to do that?

Speaker 1 Like, that was too far, Ari.

Speaker 1 Why'd you have to do that far?

Speaker 1 Oh, man, Shefty. That's, I mean, that's the best.

Speaker 1 I can't believe you pulled it out.

Speaker 4 Honestly, I was hoping you'd buy it more than you did.

Speaker 1 Like, you fucked me on Carson Wentz last year. You knew exactly what you were doing with Carson Wentz, and I knew that you would do something like that.
So my guard was up.

Speaker 1 But it's still, it was so cool to see that I was like, yes, this is. But who knows? Maybe something will happen.
What if you have? Maybe you will manifest. I'm just mad at Ari for saying who?

Speaker 1 What the fuck, dude?

Speaker 1 Man, that was good. I should have known when you brought someone.

Speaker 4 I changed Ari on my phone this morning. Yeah.

Speaker 4 To the name I.

Speaker 1 I feel like Steven still doesn't understand. No, he doesn't.

Speaker 1 You know what? You get it? You know what you've done? Do you get it? You know what you've done? It's not real, yes.

Speaker 1 I quit Zen before the NFL season started.

Speaker 1 And now

Speaker 1 now I'm three-bagging it.

Speaker 1 She, I didn't think you had that kind of thing in you. Because I was actually going to text John Harbaugh and be like, how do you not remember us? That would have been bad for you.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Well, it would have been good. I wish I had.

Speaker 4 It would have been good.

Speaker 1 Wow.

Speaker 1 Shefty, you deserve all the credit you worth.

Speaker 1 That's an unbelievable. He got you, PFT.
Really bad. Really bad.
We're going to have to figure out a way out of this.

Speaker 4 Now you're back to Jesus. I'm here.
What are you doing? What are you doing? Sorry, bro.

Speaker 1 Do you want me to jerk you off?

Speaker 1 No, you're edging now.

Speaker 1 I'm not going to jack off until Dan Snyder sells it.

Speaker 1 I'm on a masturbation.

Speaker 1 If you find out that's happening, I'll let you know. Yeah, I'm officially on a masturbation system.

Speaker 4 I'm going to try to make it back up to you. Okay.

Speaker 1 Fair enough.

Speaker 1 You're good. You're good, you.
You're good, you. I'm just happy you didn't do it to me.
Happy list to PFT. All right.
Thank you, Adam Schefter.

Speaker 4 Thank you very much, guys.

Speaker 1 Man, I'll tell you what. When you're hungry out there, you start acting like a rookie quarterback in his first game, making bad decisions, messing up the basics, being all out of sorts.

Speaker 1 That's where Snickers comes in, man. That thing is packed.
Roasted peanuts, nugget, caramel, milk chocolate. It's like the MVP of candy bars.

Speaker 1 And when you bite into it, boom, it sorts you out, gets your head back in the game of life, satisfying your hunger. Remember this.
Snickers handles your hunger so you can handle everything else.

Speaker 1 Snickers satisfies, man. That's a winning play.

Speaker 1 Okay, let's wrap up Firefest of the week.

Speaker 1 We are, yeah, rough and rowdy 20 charleston west virginia tonight i will be there on the call doing the national anthem get excited it's going to be an awesome awesome night of fights uh so buy it have fun you get a bunch of discounts i think stella blue discount as well uh if you buy r r 20 so buyr.com 20.

Speaker 1 yeah r r 20. which one did you fight in one one wow did you win yeah you gotta fight again at r r 100 okay you have to i mean you have to I'll fight Max.
Oh, no, fight. Max, you accept.

Speaker 1 Max, you just got called out. Deal.

Speaker 1 Champ called you out. Can we make this fight happen? RR 25?

Speaker 1 I think the weight discrepancy would have to

Speaker 1 be tough. No, Hank.
It's going to be the treadmill, buddy.

Speaker 1 Oh,

Speaker 1 talk to Champ. Hit the treadmill, buddy.

Speaker 1 That's fair. No, that's fair.
Damn.

Speaker 1 Yeah, 80 more fights.

Speaker 1 All right. Hank.
I have a couple fire fests. Okay, go off.
Oh, please. The first one.
Do you have your your entire lunch on your sweatshirt?

Speaker 1 I didn't pack. No, these why does that this is lint

Speaker 1 It is lint. Okay,

Speaker 1 that's lint for the next 30 days

Speaker 1 The one thing the soup can I say something real quick?

Speaker 1 No the one thing I love about Hank here. We go that I've known him a very long time.

Speaker 1 Here we go No matter where we're eating or what we're eating, he ends up with a piece of food like halfway up his chin, like on his side. You know why?

Speaker 1 Because he always has one moment, whether it's lunch or dinner, where he tries to eat something and he just coughs it up or it comes out his nose.

Speaker 1 He's good for one of those like almost maybe throw-up moments. Even if he's in ship, like a sneered cough,

Speaker 1 puke moment. You had one of those last night for sure.
I'm not a good eater. Two tables.
You're not a good eater.

Speaker 1 You're not a good eater. That's a fact.
Eating is a chore. Like, people love to eat.
You love to eat. What?

Speaker 1 I look at eating as more of like something that I have to do.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 as someone who's trying to get in the fitness world and put on weight and muscle, it's like you have to eat so much to do that. And I'm always like, fuck.

Speaker 1 Well, hey, Hank did say at lunch today after he ordered a club sandwich and he took two bites out of it. Well, I had a full French onion soup, a full shrimp crop.
It's easy. You had one shrimp.

Speaker 1 It doesn't even full shrimp. You ate a shrimp.
I ate a full shrimp with sauce.

Speaker 1 I can't even comprehend. Like, the only thing I enjoy doing is eating.
Hank did say that he needs a cookie. I wish I enjoyed eating.

Speaker 1 That's all I look forward to. I wake up and I'm like, what am I going to have for dinner? The amount of times I get hungry, I'm like, I'm starving.
What are we eating?

Speaker 1 And then we go and then I get embarrassed because I eat three bites. I'm like, all right, I'm full.
But then they're like, didn't you say you're starving? I was like, well, I was. Oh, man.

Speaker 1 You said you needed a coach to teach you how to eat properly. I've thought about it.
You will be that coach. Yeah, I've thought about it.
You're a Halloween coach. I've thought about coaching.

Speaker 1 You see what I did today when I got us three desserts for dragon? Yeah. That's a baller move.
Last night, I low-key did order two entrees.

Speaker 1 I've been prescribed ADHD medicine since I was in like sixth grade, and I think that's just destroyed my stomach and my appetite and my will to eat. But I would love to get better at it.

Speaker 1 That's not even my fire fest. All right, I'll teach you.

Speaker 1 My first Fire Fest is I didn't, I forgot to dye my beard one day and let the gray out, and people freaked out about it. Oh, yeah, that was bad.
I was shocked.

Speaker 1 Because we've seen you in those moments when you wake up before you put your makeup on, and we're like, whoa, you look old. Yeah, before we take it, I thought it was like, oh, just

Speaker 1 see how people think. Maybe 30 minutes.
There's about 30 minutes where we're prepping where Hank goes into hair and makeup and he dies. So we're used to seeing that.

Speaker 1 But yeah, you let it slip yesterday, so now the internet knows. Yeah, no, I was a little taken aghast by the reaction.
Yeah, ghast. Take gas.
Taken aghast. I was aghast.

Speaker 1 Yeah,

Speaker 1 it was a little bit of a bad guy last time.

Speaker 1 Shout out, Ward. My other Fire Fest is.

Speaker 1 I got, which I, it's not even a Fire Fest because if there's one community online that I truly could care less about and hope like the worst things happen to them, it's

Speaker 1 the lottery ball people.

Speaker 1 Oh, one fucking dickhead in Indianapolis. Get in the elevator.
I'm on the 17th floor, ironically.

Speaker 1 We get all the way to the top, and the guy gets out and goes, good look at the lottery ball, and then skirts away. Ah, but yes,

Speaker 1 couldn't even say it to my face like a man. We also had Dana down in the elevator.
He had to wait till he had an escape route.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's Dana Beerz teaching a class at his community college, and he, and there was like a list of questions, and at the bottom was, will Hank ever get the yeah, those kids are going nowhere.

Speaker 1 What about Dana Beerz? He's somewhere, is he? Yeah, I love that they brought him back as a professor emeritus of his computer school. Well, I mean, no Dana Beer.

Speaker 1 Dana Beer is a success. He's the most successful guy who went to his college.
But whoever wrote that question is going nowhere in life quickly.

Speaker 1 Maybe an internship, pardon my taste. Absolutely not.
Well,

Speaker 1 yeah.

Speaker 1 So, wait, there's other communities that you're upset with online, though, too. You really bossed that over.
Stay community. Yeah, so

Speaker 1 awl dm'd a picture and was like a

Speaker 1 buried poisonous snake or as oh yes uh it was a coral snake venomous corral snake coral snake matte corral snake uh

Speaker 1 a coral snake slithered up on him and he for whatever reason was holding his i guess not for whatever reason smart people walk around with their car sticks keep that yeah keep that motherfucking thing on the coral snake walked up on him and he used the car stick to kill the snake and avoid dying from getting a poisonous venomous bite And in the picture, the snake was like cut up.

Speaker 1 He like sliced it up like probably four or five different times. Yeah.
And the snake community comes out of the clouds and was like, what? This is so fucked up. You guys are murderers.

Speaker 1 Like, this is heckening. Like, how are you promoting this? And that's what I'm saying.
Like, if there's, I didn't think he did enough. No, if that was me, I would have sliced it up seven times.

Speaker 1 I would have found his kids. Taken the seven slices and then burnt them on fire because I would have been worried that that's going to turn it into seven new snakes.
Yeah,

Speaker 1 seven new snakes. Like it's a Terminator movie.
That actually is how it works. It is.
No, dude, do not apologize to the snake.

Speaker 1 What are they? Scaleheads? Yeah. Whatever you are, if you're in the snake community, I did zoom in on it when you first sent that picture.

Speaker 1 I zoomed in on the snake because I was like, there's no way that's a corral snake. That's got to be a corn snake because they look the same.
That's red-yellow kill a fellow.

Speaker 1 That guy, he should have sliced it up more. Yeah.
It did look like it was center court at the Sixers where it was that the join or die snake. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 Like he really killed the fuck out of that snake. Yeah, it's serial killer vibes.
It's serial killer vibes to be a snake.

Speaker 1 To be a snake.

Speaker 1 Snakes literally have had the worst rap,

Speaker 1 deservedly so, in the history of animals. They were the first animal, Adam and Eve.
The Bible. Yeah, right.
Like they, it. You are a serial killer if you are a snake.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Well, the person that killed the snake very clearly isn't a serial killer. They're a so-hero.
They're a human. They killed one snake.
Right. And that's not deservedly so.
That snake was trying.

Speaker 1 Every snake is trying to kill a person.

Speaker 1 It was tried and convicted of being a snake and was summarily executed by Hank's Karstick. Snakes? Dude, snake people, like, what? Just get a dog.
I hate snakes. You should market

Speaker 1 the next

Speaker 1 iteration as just the snake stick. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I mean, even. Even in a whole lifetime against snakes.

Speaker 1 Even people who have like weird, like people who own ferrets, like, okay, it's weird, but you could see like, hey, ferrets are kind of nice, whatever.

Speaker 1 Snakes are just, snakes literally just exist to wait till you go to sleep so they can kill you. That's it.
Snakes. If you had a baby, a snake would swallow it.

Speaker 1 Where's the baby? And it's like the snake where you can just see the giant. Yeah, snake would be like, what's for lunch? I'm hungry.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 So fuck snakes. Yeah, fuck snakes.
Fuck that guy. I don't know how he hates snakes.
Yeah, yeah. No, I hate snakes.
Snakes trash. All my homies hate snakes.
Yeah. We're the Indiana Jones podcast.

Speaker 1 We hate Nazis and snakes. Hell yeah.
Speaking of Indian Jones, I watched, I sat through the commercials too because I was into it because it was like showing a lot of Chicago, the fugitive.

Speaker 1 Great movie. Fantastic.
Good Chicago. I've never seen that? No.
Great movie. It wasn't.
I mean, the one-armed man.

Speaker 1 I don't think, I don't know, sitting through commercials to watch a movie is pretty much as

Speaker 1 good of a recommendation as you can give. That's a fact.
That's a fact. Although that's a classic.
I'm a board in the hotel. I was like, this is a good movie.

Speaker 1 It would be great if they made a movie, though, where there were Nazi snakes

Speaker 1 just slithering around wearing the arm man. Looks like the Russians trained the beluga whales.
I'll say that's redundant. All snakes are Nazis.
And all Nazis are snakes. Are snakes, correct?

Speaker 1 But imagine one and the same.

Speaker 1 Like, imagine if there was a movie where it was like giant giant Nazi snakes, and then just Sylvester Stallone shows up with a machine gun, and it's just 90 minutes of him shooting snakes. Done.

Speaker 1 I'm in. In.
Fully in. That should be our next boner dogs.
Yes. Nazi snakes.
Nazi snakes. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Not to get too historical here. Who we do Nazi snakes on a plane.

Speaker 1 I learned about the right and left on last show.

Speaker 1 Wait, wait, which is it?

Speaker 1 Conservative, liberal. Red.
Three Rs. What?

Speaker 1 What?

Speaker 1 Red, Republican, right.

Speaker 1 Oh, okay. Got it.
There you go.

Speaker 1 And what's the. NASA's.
Wait, what's the other side?

Speaker 1 Wait, wait.

Speaker 1 I learned that NASA is a serious problem. What do you mean? There's a lot of Nazis that are wearing

Speaker 1 Operation Paperclip. Big time.
We heard all their fucking scientists. That's a problem.
So that is a problem. When the U.S.

Speaker 1 and Russia or USSR were converging on Germany, the reason why we were both fighting to see who could take the capital the fastest is because we wanted their scientists to get us to the moon.

Speaker 1 So Werner von Braun, who is the head scientist that got us to the moon,

Speaker 1 actual Nazi, he built their rocks. You tried to bring back NASA shirts.
That's true. Oh, yeah.
That's true.

Speaker 1 But I've moved on from that. That was a teachable moment.

Speaker 1 That was a heated gaming moment that I moved on from, Hank.

Speaker 1 All right, PFT, your Fire Fest. My Fire Fest is one I'm going through some butt issues right now.
I don't know what it is. Maybe it's travel.
Maybe it's just what we ate yesterday, but

Speaker 1 I've been a poop guy for the last couple days. And a couple years.
Yeah. A couple days.
My whole life. Really.
And then my other issue. Jake's definitely the poop guy of this podcast.
I don't know.

Speaker 1 You missed the Super Bowl to poop. Yeah, no.
Listen,

Speaker 1 Jake has bigger moments. I think you're more consistently a poop guy.
I'm a fan of the population. Jake is the weak compiler.
Yeah, you're basically like... Cat compiler.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Jake will, Jake is Adam Dunn, and

Speaker 1 you're like Pete Rose, the hit king. You'll get as many hits

Speaker 1 as Smokes Call. True Do a Live, Clive's Call? Yeah.
What is that? Is he pranking you? Tommy, you're you're on part of my take what's up

Speaker 1 oh

Speaker 1 wait a second he's definitely doing some video damn definitely doing some weird video oh uh my

Speaker 1 now i have to know my other fire fest is uh my stomach has been hurting for other reasons this week and uh pregnant i not pregnant not yet i uh i i shared this with you guys at dinner last night but i um when i went in to get my platelet-rich plasma injections into my scalp, I got upsold

Speaker 1 into getting cool sculpting done on my stomach. And so now my stomach hurts really bad.
The good news is I'm going to have final four abs. Hell yeah.
So, and it's before Hank. It's so easy to do.

Speaker 1 You just sit in a chair and then just freeze your fat, and then your fat gets shat out of your... That's probably why I'm shitting all the time.
I'm losing weight. I'm the pinnacle of health at.

Speaker 1 Because I told you guys last night, like, similar to you running a marathon without telling anyone, I am going to do that insulin medicine without telling anyone.

Speaker 1 And someday I'll just start shedding pounds and everyone will be like, what is he doing? And I'll be like, oh, I just learned how to eat right. Yeah.
I'm 40 years old. I just started following a diet.

Speaker 1 Does Big Cat have AIDS? Yeah, no, and then I'll mix in some

Speaker 1 TRT.

Speaker 1 And yeah,

Speaker 1 I will be one of those guys who goes on Instagram being like, all you got to do is like walk two miles a day and do a few lunges and you can be jacked like me.

Speaker 1 Yeah, no, I'm definitely taking a shortcut to getting abs. I don't think anyone's questioning that, but I'm also running a marathon at some point.
So, who's to say what's going on?

Speaker 1 Also, Hank could have taken the same shortcut, but he chose not to.

Speaker 1 You chose not to, Hank, but all natural way. The cool sculpting,

Speaker 1 I'm so pumped.

Speaker 1 I'm so pumped. It's going to be, give me like four weeks, and I'm going to be shredded in my stomach area.
It's going to be incredible. All right, my Fire Fest is pretty simple.

Speaker 1 It's March. And what I mean by that,

Speaker 1 I'm just in the ringer. I'm just every day, I'm fighting for everything.

Speaker 1 TCU, Texas. I stayed up, watched the end of that game.
If people missed it, TCU was a two and a half point favorite, and Texas hit a meaningless three to cover the spread.

Speaker 1 And I didn't go to sleep for like two hours. And I forgot, like, oh yeah, this is March.

Speaker 1 Because every game is the exact same struggle, and you know it's coming, and there's nothing you can do about it. I love this time of year, but god damn it, it takes a lot out of you.

Speaker 1 You're just rooting as hard as you can for a bunch of 18-year-old kids to not fuck up. Well, the thing about basketball is there's so many games that are going on at once.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 And it's hard to keep focused. I'm trying to limit myself.
I'm betting on, I think, two games a night for the past week. So that way I can at least keep my eye on everything that's going on.

Speaker 1 There's nothing worse than losing a bet, and you didn't even get to watch it. Yeah.
At that point, you're just doing math. Yeah.
You just know that's the way you're, you're looking at a spreadsheet.

Speaker 1 Although, and by the way, everyone gambled responsibly. I was responsibly gambling on TCU.
It just was one of those games where it's like you lose on a buzzer beater that means nothing and it hurts.

Speaker 1 I do occasionally, I call movie unders.

Speaker 1 If I'm going to a movie, I'll bet the under

Speaker 1 because I won't look at my phone for the entire two hours and then come out and hope that I have good news. That's smart.
That's that's

Speaker 1 the only way to do it. Literally, anytime I go to a movie, I'll just be like, all right, what's the under? All right, I'll bet it.

Speaker 1 Because I just don't, I won't watch it, won't check it, won't do anything. Just come out and hope I have good news.

Speaker 1 Yeah, smart people that know how to gamble correctly on basketball, they will do things like bet on games and then not watch them. To me, that's the worst possible experience.
The whole point.

Speaker 1 It's betting on something and not watching the game. Yeah, no, it's watching the game.
I got two fun parts. Two die-hard locks that I'm sure will have hit by the time you're listening to this.

Speaker 1 I did take Michigan. I took them straight up.
Okay.

Speaker 1 And then I took Purdue. I'm all in on Purdue.
That's mean of you. I'm all in on Purdue.
That was mean of you. It's just a fact.

Speaker 1 It's numbers. Yeah, that was mean of you.
It's business. You didn't have to do that.
It's business, baby. You didn't have to do that.
I didn't have to, but I kind of wanted it. Yeah, but

Speaker 1 there was no science behind it.

Speaker 1 The ski mask.

Speaker 1 100 Dixon. No, but the Wisconsin-Purdue game, there was no science behind it.
I'm saying. Yeah.
There was just, I'm taking Purdue.

Speaker 1 Well, no, and so here's what happened: I put a future on Purdue a couple weeks ago to win the entire, the whole enchilada. And now I'm just like, I'm a Purdue guy, so I'm just supporting my guys.

Speaker 1 So you already have action on the game. You need Purdue to win to get the one seat.
Yeah, but

Speaker 1 I didn't think about that. Yeah, you doubled in it.
Yeah. Nova's going to win the Big East.
Max, you you have a Fire Fest?

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 1 My Fire Fest is TikTokers.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 Max is officially triggered online by Juju Smith Shuster.

Speaker 4 Juju Smith's, he's a piece of shit.

Speaker 1 I don't know who he thinks he is, like, doing the

Speaker 1 Super Bowl champ would be one thing. No, he's not.
No, he is. He's literally a Super Bowl champ.

Speaker 1 Let me ask you a follow-up question. I'm a Super Bowl champ, too.
Let me ask you a follow-up question. Did the Phillies get no hit in the World Series? Technically.

Speaker 1 Okay, technically, Juju Smith Schuster is a Super Bowl champ. Yeah, he's also a child.
Okay, and A.J. Brown would beat the absolute fucking lawsuit.

Speaker 1 Wait, in a football game or in a fight?

Speaker 1 In both.

Speaker 1 No one is saying that Juju Smith Schuster is a better football player than A.J. Brown.
He does have a Super Bowl ring.

Speaker 1 That's besides the point. Headball.
No, that seems like a... What's the goal of every NFL team when they're doing this?

Speaker 1 This is a different conversation. It was a shitty fucking takedown.

Speaker 1 Max, you have to know that getting into these conversations, we're just going to go down this road and we're going to beat you every time.

Speaker 1 I'm just trying to say what happened. I mean, it's very silly of you to get into this big debate and then come in second

Speaker 1 and

Speaker 1 not have a Super Bowl ring. It's not a debate.

Speaker 1 It's just... Well, no, no, no, no, you're right.
It's not a debate. Juju Smith Schuster is a Super Bowl champion.
A.J. Brown is a better football player.
But what did I say?

Speaker 1 That the first part isn't erased. And he would beat the fuck out of him.
Okay, that I agree with. Yeah.

Speaker 1 The thing about A.J. Brown is he beat the fuck out of Juju Smith.
Juju Smith Schuster is just a weirdo. Yeah.
He is. Like, that whole video was just weird.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 I mean, it was a bad, it was a bad, like, TikTok skit.

Speaker 1 A lot of retweets. But that's just because it's Juju Smith Schuster and everyone loves to hate on him.
Okay.

Speaker 1 I mean, it's true. No one looked at that video and was like, oh, except for fucking Hank.
Like, this was. Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 Hank, we watched it at lunch because Max was so triggered and he pulled it up and Hank was like, this is funny. This is funny.

Speaker 1 got max even more triggered can you explain what the tick tock was you just don't understand art

Speaker 1 the

Speaker 1 aren't you a film guy that was that was a bad tick tock explain what it was for those of us that haven't seen it juju smith schuster did one of those like things on tick tock those skits where they dress up the same person dresses up like different people Oh, like Eddie Murphy.

Speaker 1 He's fucking funny. Tyler Perry? Yeah.
Robin Williams. Yeah.
Juju Smith Schuster. Not funny.
Well, no, you just, we just, he's in the conversation with Eddie Murphy, Robin Williams, and Tyler Perry.

Speaker 1 One of the players was like, oh, sorry, we dropped the ball, Jalen, and like, kind of like making it.

Speaker 1 Did he not just, was he just, was Juju Smith-Schuster not just in kind of the same sentence as some of the best comedians of all time? I hate every single one of you. I'm just asking a question.

Speaker 1 Was he or was he not in that sentence? You could put Hank in the, you could just say name it. He wasn't.
No, he wasn't.

Speaker 1 No, the.

Speaker 1 I didn't do a Frank impression. Roll back.

Speaker 1 Roll back the tape. You just said Juju Smith-Schuster did one of those Eddie Murphy, Tyler Perry,

Speaker 1 Robin Williams type things.

Speaker 1 You said that. Oh, Michael Keaton, multiplicity? Yeah.
Like all of it performed.

Speaker 1 I don't care how it performed. I'm not even looking.
A.J. Brown's tweet probably did better before he deleted it.
Why did he delete it? Because he's a bitch. Oh, no.

Speaker 1 No, because he's trying to take the high road and be a professional. He's trying to figure out why or not we landed on the moon because he was triggered.
Yep, some people get emotional.

Speaker 1 But A.J. Brown would have.
A.J. Brown basically said that he would beat the fuck out of him if he keeps talking about him.
One thing about A.J. Brown.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Beat the fuck out of Hank anytime he wants.

Speaker 1 He would beat the fuck out of Juju Smith Schuster. That's a fact.
That is a fact. A.J.
Brown's my guy. Juju Smith-Schuster, piece of shit.
Facts. Okay, that's...
And what was your fire fest?

Speaker 1 Just being triggered.

Speaker 1 Just hating Juju Smith-Schuster.

Speaker 1 Oh, all right. That's a good fire fest.
I'd like to get Jerry's thoughts on Juju.

Speaker 1 Oh, he does not like him. Yeah, that's what I'm talking about.
He's my guy. Does not like him.
Yeah. Still won a Super Bowl, though.

Speaker 1 He is a Super Bowl champ. Still a pussy.
That does, like, there will be NFL Films, you know, documentary on those Chiefs. He will be featured.
So will A.J. Brown.
Yeah, is a loser.

Speaker 1 Probably not. They probably won't interview him.
Oh, nice. Ward's getting us more water.
Hell yes. Shout out Ward.
He's been our sound guy this week.

Speaker 1 He just hit us with my pleasure, too, like Chick-fil-A. That was nice.

Speaker 1 I'm chucking water. I'm going to wait to thank a sound guy this time.
All right. So

Speaker 1 should we kick it to ourselves? Hank, I really think this is the time you're going to get the lottery ball. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Do you think so? No. Why? Because I know it happens.
No,

Speaker 1 don't do that. He's going to get it right now.
You know what's fucked up is I forgot whether or not Hank got the lottery ball and he just spoiled it. I will say the piss bets were electric.

Speaker 1 We could run that back. I'll run it back anytime you want, boy.
Anytime you want. Anytime you want.
All right.

Speaker 1 Kick it to ourselves. All right.
Ready?

Speaker 1 Yeah. If I get this, I'm not going to be able to hold it.
You have to.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Are we still taping? Yeah.

Speaker 1 What you just said is illegal.

Speaker 1 You're going to have the same problem. No, I won't say shit.
All right. When have we ever spoiled this? Never.
Ways the P-B. You literally still on?

Speaker 1 I got to get it. I don't know why.

Speaker 1 Power on the P-back. I tweeted it still on.
Oh, yeah. No, I thought that's what I'm saying.
I get this, and you have to drink the P-back. I tweeted the eyeball emoji.
That could mean anything. Okay.

Speaker 1 So it is Friday's Friday's show. We're taping this because we're in Indy.
The P-bat is still on. If I get it, Hank has to drink a sip of his P.
If Hank gets it, I have to drink a sip of my P.

Speaker 1 He's not going to get it, though. Have you ever gotten it? No.

Speaker 1 Okay, numbers.

Speaker 1 6-9. 17.

Speaker 1 18. I'm never doing that mistake again.
20. 8.
Keep in mind, 3 and 45. I think 45, but 3 is definitely out.
76.

Speaker 1 Oh, 17 just popped up, Hank.

Speaker 1 67.

Speaker 1 Damn. No, Hank.

Speaker 1 Another week. No lottery balls for Hank.

Speaker 1 Love you guys.

Speaker 1 Dogs walk in a circle before they sleep to coordinate themselves north-south.

Speaker 1 Is that true?

Speaker 1 That's true.

Speaker 1 Someone does walk in a circle. I thought it was because

Speaker 1 they pat down the grass. They walk in a circle to make sure that they're in a suitable sleeping environment.

Speaker 1 Something about magnetic fields. No, it's patting down the grass.

Speaker 4 No, no, no.

Speaker 1 If you look it up, they're like always directing it. Yeah, yeah, let's look it up.
Let's look it up real quick. Dogs, dogs, circles,

Speaker 1 north,

Speaker 1 south. Let's see what we got here.
The Wi-Fi sucks. So I guess we just have to believe you.

Speaker 1 Yeah, north-south. Oh, okay.
Confirmed. My dad don't have anything.
He just looked at his friend. He goes, oh, yeah, north-south.
Canines choose to do so in a north-south axis.

Speaker 1 up.

Speaker 1 I

Speaker 1 need to see all

Speaker 1 people

Speaker 1 talking away.

Speaker 1 I don't know what about to say. I'd say it anyway.

Speaker 1 Today is another day to find you. Shy it away.

Speaker 1 Oh, I'll be coming for your love, okay.

Speaker 1 Shy it away.

Speaker 1 Oh, I'll be coming for your love, okay.

Speaker 1 Needless to say,

Speaker 1 I want want to sit in for me, it's over a little bit.

Speaker 1 Slowly learning that life is okay.

Speaker 1 Say after me,

Speaker 1 it's for better to be saved than sorry. Say after me,

Speaker 1 it's for better to be saved than sorry. Tony daring.