Mike Florio, The Bucs Are Dead, NFL Week 8 Picks & Preview + Fyre Fest Of The Week

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On today's part of my take, we have our good friend Mike Florio back on the show talking to NFL with him.

Some crazy conspiracy theories.

We have our week eight picks and preview.

They're not conspiracies when they're actually true.

That's true.

That's true.

We have our week eight picks and previews.

We do Fantasy Fuck Boys with Florio, Fire Fest of the Week, and Thursday Night Football.

Another bummer of a game.

We'll talk about it, though.

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Today is Friday, October 28th, and Tom Brady should retire.

The Buccaneers are a pathetic, pathetic football team.

Oh my god, Tom Brady should retire.

The short passes he was throwing tonight were particularly painful.

It's all because they were calling these very short passes for him to throw, and he was off target on the easy ones.

It was bad.

He had a couple wide-open receivers that he missed tonight, and he just looks sad.

He looks sad.

He looks like the whole team is not on the same page.

He's the greatest quarterback of all time.

Why does he have to keep doing it?

Like, this is one of those situations where maybe it was because he thought this defense would be better.

So, and he does have more arm strength than Peyton Manning did in his last season.

But that last, remember that last season of Peyton Manning where it was just after the first quarter, every game in his Torradol shop, you know, kind of dissipated.

He just looked sad.

And we're not all the way there, but the whole team is broken.

And Tom Brady looks sad.

And let me throw this in there, which I think because Tom Brady gets all the headlines and like what's wrong with him.

Todd Bowles sucks as a coach.

I'm sorry.

He sucks.

So you could definitely make the case that

as bad as the team is right now, some responsibility, if not all of it, needs to go to them.

They get so many penalties.

It's so many dumb stuff.

So they're dealing with backup linemen.

Their offensive line sucks.

Tom Brady's mad at them.

They're mad because they're getting embarrassed on national TV by their their geriatric quarterback screaming at him because it's past his bedtime.

And it's painful to watch.

It makes you feel bad for Tom Brady, which is something I didn't know could happen.

Like Tom Brady, there's a guy that he's got it all

until literally the start of this season.

Yeah.

Everything fell apart for Tom Brady at the start of the season.

And on the field, too.

Like, I'm not talking about the off-the-field stuff at all.

I'm saying, like,

it's sad.

I'm sad watching it.

How badly do you think he could wish he could go back in time and just

keep the retirement?

Because, but you know what?

Not only did it not like he won the Super Bowl at Tampa Bay, so he has seven.

Obviously, I don't think anyone will ever get close to that in terms of quarterbacking.

And remember, even though they lost in the playoffs last year, it was that crazy game against the Rams that was like, oh my God, Tom Brady's going to pull one last rabbit out of his hat and they end up losing, but it wasn't him.

It was the defense and having that lapse at the end of the game to Cooper Cup.

Like, it was not obviously, obviously, you know, going off on his white horse and winning a Super Bowl, but it was pretty close in terms of, holy shit, our lasting memory is like, even at the end, you'd still be afraid of Tom Brady no matter what the score is.

Now, we get to see him on a Thursday night football, which Thursday night football in its own has just become sad.

And it just looks sad.

Everything looks sad.

Yeah,

I kind of disagree with the fact that he wants to go back

and change things

because he,

you ever make a really bad decision and instead of changing your mind about that decision, you just double down on it.

Oh, yeah, I'll be fine.

And then you just dig in.

He's tripled down.

That's basically like kind of what this show is to a certain extent.

Yeah.

And if you're just, if you wait out a take long enough, you'll eventually be right, even if you're very wrong.

Except Todd Bowles being.

Except Todd Bowles, I'm still waiting.

Yeah.

That might not be a good thing.

Now, what if he goes to Blaine Gabbert?

Is it time to put Blaine Gabbert in?

No, Kyle Trask.

That's right.

Kyle Trask is next up.

He's the future.

He's the future.

Put Kyle Trask or Blaine Gabbert in the game.

Maybe do a little Bailey Zappy Mac Jones with the two of them.

Yeah.

And then get a spark going.

Maybe that way you can maybe beat the Panthers the next time you play them.

Yeah, and listen,

obviously the story is Tom Brady because it does look sad.

But the Ravens were phenomenal.

And the Ravens, like, they kind of got their juice back in terms of running the football.

They ran for 230-plus yards tonight.

Lamar was incredible.

Like, I don't know.

The Ravens, like,

I hate doing the argument, like, oh, this team could be 7-0 or this team, but the Ravens have been, they've had a fourth-quarter lead in every game, and they've had some epic failures at the end of games, but it feels like they're starting to get everything right and starting to play that football style that they had a few years back where they just run it down everyone's throat, and there was nothing anyone could do.

Mark Andrews is out in the first quarter in this game, and they didn't miss a beat.

Yeah, so we talk a lot about these Tom Brady conspiracies.

We've got Florio on later to talk more about those.

So So maybe we can talk about some things that are grounded in facts.

And Hank, you had a theory about what was going on tonight, right?

No, I was just saying.

I mean, there was a report I saw Jerry Thornton put up.

It was like, Giselle gave Tom an ultimatum, you know, retire now.

We can maybe, you know, reconsider things.

And with the way that things are going, that feels like a trap.

I'm just going to say right now, that feels like a trap.

Tom Brady, if you're listening, I know you're in AWL.

That feels like a trap.

That feels like you'd retire and then she'd be like, just kidding.

But wait.

We're still divorced.

Wait, this this was a Jerry Thornton exclusive report?

Well, no, that's just where I saw it.

I'm just crediting my, my, where I, you know, where I saw it.

Well, and we have the theory because we were supposed to have Julian Edelman in studio tonight, and he had to cancel about an hour or two before the game started.

And Hank put on his tinfoil hat and was like, maybe he knows that Tom Brady's going to retire after this.

Yeah, I came to the Brady conclusion first after watching

the game.

I said, this is bad.

He's clearly frustrated.

I've never seen him more frustrated.

After every throw, he's pissed off, yelling at receivers, yelling at himself.

And I was like, he's going to walk away.

Like, he might just walk off the field and leave.

And then it clicked.

It was like, we were supposed to have Edelman on.

He canceled last minute.

Maybe he knew.

Maybe he knew.

That would be the ultimate gambling brain of Tom Brady to be like, I'm just going to play one more game.

And if we win this one, I'll stay.

And it's like, no, your team is bad, dude.

Just go away.

Well, it's got to be tough on him because he yells at himself so much, like Hank was saying.

He's so mad at himself.

Like,

after every single missed throw, he's just standing alone just like screaming at his feet and that's got to be bad for his psyche that's not that's not mentally healthy for anybody and and maybe this is actually is like his master plan like we always give belichek the benefit of the doubt with every move he makes he's like oh belichek did it again what if tom brady's big plan here was for america to feel bad for him at the end because it is Like, I do feel bad for him.

He's the greatest quarterback of all time, and I feel bad.

I didn't think it was possible to

feel this way about Tom Brady.

Like, Tom Brady's always been like the biggest prick because he's such an all-time winner.

And there's never been a reason to even remotely feel bad about Tom Brady.

And now it's like, I bet Tom Brady would switch places with me if he had the opportunity.

Yeah, he probably would.

Todd Bowles, there's two of them right now.

I just...

I know that this is very meatball-y of me to say, but like, just show a little bit of emotion here and there when your team sucks.

Scream at someone.

Get mad at something.

You know what I mean?

or at least at the refs, just do anything, just don't be like half dead the entire time.

Like, he's got Jim Caldwell face where he just like

do something, it reminds me of Steve Nash, yeah, Steve Nash, when he's coaching the Nets, just doesn't open his mouth.

What's that, Jake?

Well, yeah, last night just got pissed off, yeah.

Was that sarcasm?

Oh, no, I didn't see the Nets.

Yeah, last night he got kicked out of the game.

Good, yeah, okay, that's good, but it was tunneling.

No, but it was

it was, I actually thought you were making this point because it looked awkward.

I didn't, it looked like he was

like, watch me be mad, and it's like, oh, dude, I don't think you have that in you.

So maybe I take it back.

Maybe Todd Bulls shouldn't because we'd feel the same way.

We'd be like, Todd Bulls, what's wrong with you, dude?

That's embarrassing.

I missed get up this morning.

Yeah.

Yeah,

he went nuts last night.

Yeah, and yeah, the Ravens, I have the Ravens back in my good tier.

Maybe even...

Maybe even Super Bowl contender tier.

I feel like they're just always battling injuries, too.

So once they get everyone back, and we saw Deshaun Jackson for a minute tonight, look, Tom Brady's getting sacked.

We're still watching this game.

Oh, also, tonight, Tom Brady got the all-time sack record against him.

Yep.

So it's a big time.

Where were you?

Big Ben's off the hook.

Big Ben was number one.

Big Ben might, you know, that movie with Bernie Mac, Mr.

3000, where he comes back just to get the 3,000th hit?

I wouldn't be shocked if Big Ben tried to come back later on this season and be like, come on, come on, Mike.

Just put me in the fourth quarter of a game one time for old time's sake and just let me take one more hit.

But the only problem is if Tom Brady plays like three more games, he's going get sacked 25 more times.

That's true.

Because he's just getting brutalized.

Stathole Sports had the comparison of Tom Brady's season to the classic movie Nightstale with Heath Ledger, where his girl told him, if you really love me, you'll go out there and you'll lose every match that you have.

And he was so dominant before that and then lost it all for love.

He's sending Giselle a message.

Yeah, like, I can't go on without you, babe.

And you know what?

It really, you know what does suck too is that the people who basically spent the last 10 years saying that Tom Brady is this is the year, they got the satisfaction.

No, they shouldn't have done that.

Not they did, not really, because

people didn't do it this year.

I know what you're saying, yeah.

I that's what we were talking to like Fitzpatrick and Jason McCordy about.

We were saying, like, somebody needs to be the Max Kellerman to say, like, I think Tom Brady, this is the year that Father Time wins, right?

But nobody really did that this year.

Yeah, and if he gets this over, it's like they're fighting for the over for you, hey.

Code status forever.

We'll stay on until we find out if he gets the over here.

I'll do an ad real quick.

This would be an all-time part of my take moment if we spent the last like 12 minutes literally burying Tom Brady.

Oh, we'll keep it all in.

And then, yeah, an on-side kick, yeah, like a touchdown on-side kick.

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The Bucs are still trying to get the over for us.

I mean, that'd be awesome if Mike Evans got a touchdown right here.

I'm rooting for you guys.

Tom Brady no longer washed if he just passes it to my sweet boy, Mike.

Yeah, so I don't know what else.

I mean, like I said, the Ravens are back, and the Bucs,

they're just pathetic.

What's their schedule coming up?

Because they need to play like...

They need to play

Northwestern.

I was saying they need to play Northwestern.

Not to jinx everything, but

things are looking pretty good for my Falcons' future.

Yeah.

Ooh, they're home against the Rams.

That's going to be a tough one.

Home against the Seahawks.

The Browns and Saints.

They're never going to win again.

They're just never going to win a game again.

Over bye week at least?

No.

Yeah, after Germany.

Yeah, after the Seahawks.

Okay.

Big news, though.

And think about it.

If you had a big hat, I know you.

If you had a trip to Germany and your team was playing bad and you could retire.

Well, you could get to get some kind of treatments.

Maybe to get.

I wouldn't be shocked if Tom Brady got everyone the treatment.

I don't know.

Long flight's a great thing to push off.

I think Giselle's family spent enough time and effort trying to get out of Germany.

Everything's batted ball now.

You know what the Bucs fans should say if they lose that game?

Leave Coach Bowles in Germany.

Yeah.

That's good.

I've never heard that one before.

I like that one.

The other big news was LeBron James disavowed the Dallas Cowboys.

Oh, wow.

He broke it up.

Friendship over the Dallas Cowboys.

The Cleveland Browns are now my new best friend, LeBron James.

Because he thought the Cowboys are too problematic.

So now

he's rooting for the Browns.

Okay.

They don't have any skeletons in their closet.

He has no idea, Deshaun Watson.

No idea.

There's a flag on the play, a touchdown, but a flag on the play.

I feel like it's against the Bucks.

Could have been an offside.

I feel like that one's against the Bucs.

Julio Jones made an appearance.

Also, turns out getting a bunch of guys who are still

the over.

Touchdown?

Yes.

Yes.

Wait, 49 seconds.

Yep.

Spent too much time on the clock.

Yeah.

Also, later on in the show, we talk about the NFL upcoming weekend, and that was taped before Tony got traded to the Chiefs.

Yes.

So now he's on the Chiefs, and everybody's like, that's not fair to give Patrick Mahomes this weapon

of a guy that I think he has like two catches.

How many NFL catches does Tony have?

Oh, he's got more than that.

He had like one or two explosive games in his catch.

Oh, Oh, he had that.

He had that one big game.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

He had like a really nice game.

Oh, another sad.

It's just like dropped passes,

sad footpaths.

Oh, there's another flag.

It's just sad.

The Bucs also are, I feel like anecdotally,

they run the most plays that just don't count because they'll just be like, they'll run a really long play and then there'll be a flag and have to run it again.

They just spend so much extra time running plays that don't end up meaning anything.

Flag on Queen.

This would be so funny.

That's how they buried her.

50-41 catches.

You're on a roll.

For Cregarius Tony.

How many?

41.

Oh, wow.

Okay, yeah.

That's significantly more than I thought he had.

Yeah, I remember he had one explosive game.

He was out for most of the season, though.

I just wonder if he's going to be one of those guys that gets to Kansas City and he's healthy.

I think he's definitely retiring after this game, how the refs are.

Well, no, because they have this comeback.

Oh, and then that's officially it.

just absolutely stuffed tombrady is just standing there all right let's do um

i you know what if they come back and win let's just keep all this in that would be very funny um

i so we were supposed to have jewels hank

asked for us to wait to do the lottery ball machine for uh when jules was in here because he said quote unquote i want to get my first win with jewels um

we were like well

we're still going to end the show with the lottery ball machine because that's what we've been doing for two plus years now.

Watch PM TV out now.

Hank first machine.

He's just getting dominated.

But at the end of the show, I did tell him we would do an extra one when Jules was here.

This is before we knew Jules was out.

So, Hank, this one's official.

This counts.

You get two cracks in it today.

17.

And you're still not going to get it.

You're going 17?

I'm going 17.

If someone else gets it, does it count?

Yes.

This is an officially

sanctioned lottery ball machine.

What were the numbers that we haven't gotten?

Spoiler.

Oh, well, just tell me one of them: six.

Six.

Okay, I'm going with six.

I'm going 12 for Tom Brady.

Also, NASCAR this Sunday is part of my cheese stick car.

Oh, hello.

Check it out.

This is our first doubleheader since August 28th, 2022.

Wow.

You could forget.

Okay, Max.

It's 20.

And then we're going to go right into Florio.

And then our weekend preview.

18.

If Hank gets it, everyone's going to be so mad.

Oh, God.

79.

I thought that was 69 for you.

I thought it was 78.

Hank, just like I predicted, you weren't going to get this one.

Good one.

All right, let's go into Florio, and then we have week eight picks and preview and Firefest.

Okay, we now welcome on our very good friend,

recurring guest.

You can see him all the time on the cock, pro football talk.

He's got a website, too.

It's 21st anniversary coming up on Tuesday.

Do I have that right, Michael?

21 years.

Incredible.

2001, November 1, we launched, spawning ultimately the career of your co-host.

That was our only purpose.

We all have a purpose.

That was our purpose.

Thank you.

Thank you, mom and dad, for making a website.

At any point leading up to that, where you're like, there's a little bit more going on in the world right now in the fall of 2001.

Maybe I shouldn't be using my time on a sports website?

Well, you know, what happened was I was actually working for ESPN.com at the time 9-11 happened.

I mean, you're hitting the nail right on the head.

I was practicing law full-time.

And as far as ESPN knew, I was working on their insider NFL website full-time.

And it was like a weird sitcom premise trying to keep them from finding out I also was a full-time lawyer.

And they offered me a one-year contract extension right after 9-11.

It's like, you know, this life is too much.

I'm working for ESPN from 5 a.m.

until 11 a.m.

and I'm trying to run my law practice after that.

And this just isn't working.

I want to start my own thing.

I want to have immediacy with what I write.

I don't want to have to wait for three hours for it to go through levels of editorial.

And

that was when I decided, fuck it.

I'm just going to do my own thing.

I love it.

So looking back 21 years, it's a crazy accomplishment.

I mean, we joke with you all the time and we, you know, belittle you and call you crazy.

You did lose your mind the last few years, but the last 20, you know, being on the internet for 21 years, day in and day out is incredible because, you know, we live it on our side.

We know how hard that is.

It's an incredible accomplishment.

What's the one story that you look back and you're like, yep, that's the one that I loved writing, reporting, breaking, whatever it may be?

I think the one that really got us on the map happened when when they found a dogfighting yard on Mike Vick's property in Surrey County, Virginia, and everyone was trying to brush it under the rug.

And my instincts from the get-go pointed to the idea that there's no way he didn't know what was going on.

There's no way he's clueless about this.

And he denied it, denied it, denied it.

We kept pushing.

I know some people think.

It never would have come to a head if we didn't push it as hard as we did.

I don't believe that.

If people want to think that, that's fine.

But I think that was kind of the moment we truly arrived.

That was 2007, April, May, June timeframe.

But it was just kind of a gradual, slow-rolling snowball.

We saturated the people in the business, coaches, GMs, agents, media people.

And that's still the case.

If we could ever get the same percentage of fans that we have, percentage of people in the business who live on the website, I'd be able to retire a couple of times over.

Yeah.

It's just never really

caught on that, and that's fine.

I'm happy with where we are, but it's not the same saturation of the fan base as it is the saturation of the people who are actually in the business.

Yeah, yeah.

Well, I wanted to bring up something that I saw you put out, a more recent thing that you've done here.

This was October 23rd, a picture of you in your garage, and you're staying next to, I mean, it looks like you got some great cars there.

Um, don't want to speculate, but that looks like it might be an Audi or an Acura.

Uh, and you're wearing a nice suit on top, really nice suit.

And then on bottom, you're wearing like size 55 athletic shorts and then slippers.

Is this what you're wearing when I see you on TV?

Are you wearing, it's an absurd outfit.

Well, and it's funny because the night before, it was my nephew's senior year homecoming.

Oh, yeah, Michael Pauly.

Yeah, we saw the Michael Pauly.

Paulie, Michael, Mikey Pauly.

And we had a bunch of the kids here because it's a very picturesque.

You guys have been here in the fall.

Very, very nice place to do photos.

And so my wife saw me going upstairs to the studio for Football Night in America and she just started laughing.

She's like, you look ridiculous.

And she pulled her phone up and she took a picture and she sent it to me.

And it's like, you know, what the hell?

And yeah, that's what's the point?

What's the point?

I mean, I have jeans on right now.

It's like, what's wrong with you?

This picture is ridiculous, though.

You have to admit.

Well, that's fine.

Have you looked at it before you posted it?

Because Because it's.

I don't care.

You guys don't understand.

I mean, you know me well enough.

Big Cat knows me well enough to know I don't give a fuck.

No, I know you don't give a fuck.

I mean, that's very clear with

how your brain has gone the last few years.

You don't care.

You don't care.

All right, so let's talk some football, Mike, because we do have football.

We're talking about football.

Why?

Let's do big picture.

Why does this season suck so far?

Why do you think it sucks?

You mean from the standpoint of not enough points?

That was a trick question.

It doesn't suck because it's football.

But why?

There has been some complaints about maybe not the best games,

a lot of Broncos games in prime time, some low-scoring games.

Is there any reason, like talking to people in the league, is there anything that you can point to, or is this just a cyclical thing that we have to deal with?

And eventually we'll get the great football later on in the year.

I think there's a couple of factors here.

And obviously, we know it takes time for offenses to get going because of limited reps now in training camp and offseason and the preseason is down to three games.

It takes the offenses a while to catch up with the defenses.

And also, we've been spoiled the last five years by a great young group of quarterbacks and a great old group of quarterbacks.

Well, now the old quarterbacks aren't as great as they were, and it shows.

And the Russell Wilson stuff, we've had four of their games in primetime.

We got three more standalone Broncos games, and he just doesn't have it anymore.

He's only 33, but he lost his mobility to the extent that he used to have it, and it's affected his game, and that hurts.

Sims has a theory, Chris Sims, co-host of PFT Live Monday through Thursday, although it's Tuesday through Thursday in season.

Noted Blake Bortles hater, but go ahead.

And Spleen Havertz.

Yeah, no Spleen Gene.

He thinks that we've gotten to the point in the NFL where the defensive linemen are so good, they just overpower the offensive lines.

And there are so many good defensive linemen, and there's so much value placed on pass rusher that they are just systematically overpowering.

And, you know, you watch the average game.

There's a lot of holding.

You see guys coming around the edge and they're getting grabbed and they're getting pulled and they're looking the other way on it.

They're trying to keep the quarterbacks upright and let them do their thing.

I think that's one of the big factors as well.

And the scoring's down.

And the NFL says it doesn't bother them.

But you know what?

When the scoring's up, they send out press releases every Monday.

Hey, the scoring's up.

Hey, record pace, this, that, and the other thing.

The scoring's down, and the games aren't as exciting, but it is still football.

So,

but that's a good answer.

I did, I mean, the defensive lineman answer is something I haven't really thought about.

We do have an insane group of talent when it comes to guys who can get to the quarterback.

So that's, yeah, that's a good answer.

Do you think that's because they're taking kids that are excelling at football in high school and early years of college, guys that are stronger and more aggressive, that could be playing on the offensive line?

They're like, we could use you more.

It's more important to have a strong pass rush than it is to build you up on the offense.

Like, are we steering people that

would be great, like guards and centers?

Are we putting them along the defensive line instead?

I mean, certain body types, it's not going to matter.

But when you have a guy, you know, like a tight end basketball player type, and that body can get molded in different ways.

Instead of putting 80 pounds on him and making him a left tackle, you let him stay streamlined and you let him be the guy that goes around the edge and gets after the quarterback like Kayvon Thibodeau.

So, I think that as we saw how much money pass rushers make, how important they are, and it's usually around the postseason when they really remind us how important they are.

And how many Super Bowls have we seen in the past 15 years where a great pass rush just overwhelms a great quarterback?

It goes back to Super Bowl 42, Gives Patriots.

There have been several since then, where it's like we're reminded, you know, probably a good idea to have good pass rushes.

And guys who want to get paid, they're going to gravitate toward the skill sets they're going to set them up to to get the money and and really between offensive and defensive line what are your stats if you're an offensive lineman anybody gives a about yeah if you're a pass rusher you got sacks and so you have a way to chase some glory and become a star and make a hell of a lot of money so i think there's something to that that you know guys get pigeonholed and they get pushed one direction or the other as they're coming up and guys are going to willingly say i want to be a pass rusher more than i want to be be a pass blocker.

Yeah, there's no fantasy stats for an offensive lineman.

You don't get credit for pancake.

You should start doing that.

Yeah, you should do fantasy league for

women only.

Do you think that's possible, Mike?

Don't.

I'm not.

I'm not.

Okay, all right, all right, all right, all right, all right, fine, fine, fine.

Uh, we

love to play a game here where we can just hypothesize on what stories you love to write about.

When Tua got concussed for the second time in two weeks, we're like, oh, this is Florio.

Like, he's going to be all over this.

And I also get am guessing you love this new protocol where if anyone stands up and wobbles a little, they're out for like three weeks.

How much are you loving this?

Because you love, you like, you like Sky Judge for the pass interference.

You like the game being as slow as possible and as many reviews as possible.

You know, I'm just going to ignore the gratuitous shit that you're adding to your comment and just answer your question.

Look, I think it's very important for the NFL to take the health and safety of the players seriously because if the players don't, that's one of the things we learned through the Tua example.

He was the one selling the back injury stuff stronger than anyone to the point where the doctors bought it and didn't even bother to think maybe he's selling us a bill of goods here after they saw him wobble around.

I think that the future of the sport

is so critically tied to the willingness of parents to let their kids play that the NFL has to button up its protocols to the point where it's perfection and hope that those protocols trickle down i look at what happened between sunday september 25th and thursday september 29th and then throw in this cameron brait thing that didn't get the attention it should have where he had a head injury was off the field for a couple of plays somehow got back in and god forbid he would have gotten another head injury.

That's what happens to high school players.

I mean, if I'm the parent of a high school kid now and I see that, I say, if the NFL can't protect their guys, what hope does rinky-dink a little high school conference ever have of protecting my son?

And, you know, I lived through that three years of my son playing high school football, scared to death every snap.

What's going to happen to him?

And I think the NFL needs to instill enough confidence in parents.

And Big Hey, you're going to be there soon.

No, no, these are good points.

These are good points.

And so you want to do everything you can.

to make sure people realize they have faith in the system.

They need to do more at the high school level.

There needs to be a greater willingness to pull guys off the field.

There's still kids dying every year in high school football, but the moment that parents say, no more,

no more, that's the moment it becomes harder for the NFL to have a supply of quality football players.

So it's an existential reality, and it bubbled up 10 years ago.

And it's kind of back now with this Tua stuff.

And they're hoping that it dies down and parents don't freak out and tell their kids they can't play football.

So that's the quorum.

It's a good, it's a good, it's a good answer to a to that question.

You did love writing about it.

You did.

You did.

Look, I like like good stories whatever it is that people are interested in my guiding light 21 years ago was if i'm interested in it i assume enough other people are going to be interested in it to come read it so sometimes i'll admit my sense of what's interesting is a little up but that's the privilege of owning

if i think i like it and i know some other people don't like it too bad you judges scroll by it if you don't like it tough keep going and you'll find a story yeah i know i remember 10 years ago you were like i think it'd be really interesting if terry bradshaw was dead yeah and then you blogged 10 years ago and Yeah, I mean, I'm sure.

He'll eventually be right.

I'm going to credit you when he does die.

And I'm sure you're not going to be able to do that.

As first reported on First FootballTalk.com.

Yeah, you know what the internet needs more?

It needs 50 more blogs on Tom Brady having a conversation with Steven Ross once.

That's the stuff, you know?

That's the juice.

It was more than once.

It was more than once.

I knew you.

Yeah, but what happens?

How many times?

What happens is this.

Every time we bring it up on this show, Hank comes at me and he's like, you and your stupid internet dad with your little Twitter Twitter fingers love to speak.

What's he got a problem with?

He thinks that it's fake news.

He thinks that Tom Brady wasn't actually going to be the owner of the Dolphins.

The guy's Bruce Beale, not Stephen Ross.

Bruce Beale is the right-hand man of Stephen Ross.

Beale and Brady are tight and this has been coming for several years.

And they try, as the NFL found, I mean, I don't know what else I need to say.

The NFL issued a statement.

saying they tampered with Tom Brady in 2019.

They tampered with Tom Brady in 2020.

They tampered with him in 2021.

They tampered with him in 2022.

This was all Bruce Beale trying to get Tom Brady onto the Dolphins and talking about it too much.

Tampering happens all the time.

Most people keep their mouths shut about it.

Beal was talking about it too much.

And I also think that the NFL knew that Stephen Ross was trying to tank in 2019 to get Joe Burrow, but they don't want to tell the world that that's going on.

So they felt like they had to get him some way.

And this kind of fell into their laps.

Hank, do you have a comment about that?

So, Murta, you're not supposed to say a thing.

Yeah.

Yeah, I mean, I said that early on.

I think think details have come out that might lend that to be true.

Uh,

but early on, before you know, all the facts came out, yeah, it seemed like a tell tale.

Well, he was bringing the facts out, yeah, he was the match.

That's when Mike was

some reckless speculation, yes, oh, yeah, some maybe informed speculation.

By the way, this is Mike Florio from his barn, nothing can be held against him when he's in his barn.

No, yeah, international.

There's a theory, there's a theory in league circles, and I think I'm couching it properly, that the issues with Tom Brady and his wife blew up when the league announced the punishment of the Dolphins because of the flirtation with Brady, because she had, as the theory goes, no idea he was talking to the Dolphins about playing against him.

So Cadell

got Brady divorced.

Wow.

I like this, Mike.

I won't take it that step.

That is reckless speculation.

But I'm telling you, there are people who are employed by NFL teams who think, and when you look at the timeline, that stuff came out, and it was the next day he started missing practices.

Ultimate snake movie.

I like this, Mike.

He thought four games for Deflate Gate was bad.

He's going to end your marriage.

Yeah.

Mike,

you got the goods, man.

All right, so we'll do a more sensitive subject.

You know, that was too much where Hank

was hitting him in tough spots.

Around the league, do people think Bill Belichick has lost his fastball?

Look, I think here's the issue with Bill Belichick.

And

it's very simple.

Hank is giving you a face right now, by the way.

That's okay.

That's okay.

He's got two kids working for him.

And if one of those kids needs to be fired, he can't do it.

And that makes it impossible for him to hold other people accountable.

I think that's the root of where things kind of got wobbly.

You know, they get their asses kid 47 to 17 in the playoffs.

Maybe Steve Belichick should have been fired.

You can't fire Steve Belichick if you're Bill.

That's the problem with nepotism, which is rampant in in coaching.

And there's reasons for it.

Gives the coach a way to reconnect with the kid that he ignored while the kid was growing up because he was working all the time.

And now they get to work together all the time.

And the kid's been around the game.

So the kid's not freaked out by it.

The kid's in a position where he understands the sport and he can maybe ease right into it as a good coach.

But I think that's part of the problem.

When you can't hold your kids accountable, you can't hold anybody accountable.

And then you hear a lot of Belichick saying, I'm responsible, I'm responsible, I'm responsible.

He's got all those Super Bowl rings.

He doesn't want to have to hold hold anyone accountable because he can't hold his kids accountable.

I think that's the root of it.

And then this

Josh McDaniels leaves.

And so we did.

They made the playoffs last year

for the record.

They did make the playoffs last year.

Hank wants to do that.

They did make the playoffs, but they lost 47-17 for the record, too.

And then Josh McDaniels leaves, and Joe Judge and Matt Patricia are giving the keys to the offense.

And people are like, what the fuck's going on with that?

If it was any other coach, we'd be laughing.

We'd be like, this is ridiculous.

Remember when Andy Reid decided to make Juan Castillo the defensive coordinator when he'd been the offensive line coach?

And people were like, what the?

This is crazy.

That's what we'd be saying about Belichick if he didn't have six Super Bowl wins.

So, hey, they're getting better.

But he does.

He does.

But he does.

Yeah, he does.

He's the best coach of all time.

But look at the stuff with Mac Jones.

Something weird is going on with Mac Jones.

I don't think Mac Jones likes the fact that he's gone from Josh McDaniels to a couple of guys who weren't offensive coaches.

I think Mac Jones is maybe.

complaining too much about that to other people.

It's gotten back to Belichick.

And now there's, you know, Belichick proving a point with some of this stuff that's gone on.

This is when I say these are just, you guys are just making this up.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Hank, Mike would never just like make something like that.

That sounds like a

anti-Patriots erotica night.

I want to defend Mac Jones for a second.

I would defend Mac Jones and then if Matt Patricia became my offensive coordinator, I would complain.

I'd be like, what the fuck?

Like, what are we doing?

It's either him.

I mean, Hank, look at what happened Monday night.

What the fuck was that?

He starts the game and then they yank him out.

And Belichick says that was the plan all along.

And guys like Ramondre Stevenson and Jacoby Myers are like, that wasn't the plan all along.

They said that pregame, though, that that was the plan going into the game.

Yeah.

What, Mike, who not after like one or two series, I don't think.

Like, that's there's no chance that that was the plan to take Mac Jones out that early in the game.

Well, though, do you have any intel on the ESBN Skycam wire?

The ball did not hit the Skycam wire.

Of course.

Can I just say that?

Can I just say this?

I don't know that I'm supposed to say this, but I'm going to say it anyway.

Go off.

I've seen the Sky Cam video.

The thing doesn't wobble at all when the ball supposedly hits the wire.

Interesting.

The camera angle is straight and true the whole time.

There's a stabilizer in the camera.

How do you know that, Hank?

But

this brings up a question I don't think I've ever asked you.

What fan base hate you the most?

They all do.

No, but there's got to be one.

There's got to be one that it's like, it becomes personal.

It depends on what is going on at any given time.

When Joe Burrow, for example, is coming out in the draft, and I'm told by people that I know and trust who are connected to Joe Burrow, that he's thinking about making a power play and not playing for the Bengals.

And someone tells me, as it's quoted off the record, of course, in Playmakers, if Joe Burrow was from Athens, Georgia and not Athens, Ohio, he wouldn't have played for the Bengals.

I had Bengals fans mad at me, even though it was 100% true.

Well, no, I can confirm.

I can confirm that.

I offered Joe Burrow, hypothetically, a $100 million guaranteed contract to go to the XFL at the time instead of the NFL.

And he said, if you can get me $100 million guaranteed, I'll do it.

So you're right.

The Dolphins fans with 2-A-NON, I hear you.

Well, you're wrong about that.

What do you mean?

2-0 exists.

Expect us.

You and your butt buddy Chris Sims think that Tu is not a good quarterback when he's proven that he is.

What happens is when you just tell the truth and you say what you think and you'll criticize any team and you don't try to sugarcoat it, people get pissed off at you when you say bad things about their team.

That's just the way it is.

People watch games and they get mad at the announcers.

That's true.

Announcers biased in favor of one team or the other.

It's like, what the fuck are you talking about?

But that's how fans are.

And the passion.

that draws them to the sport and gets them to consume our content, yours and mine, that's the passion that makes them go a little nutty sometimes when they think somebody's being unfair with their team.

So I can live with it.

Is there a fan base that likes you?

I get the feeling that the Saints fan base likes you because you're openly antagonistic sometimes of the NFL and they dig that about you.

Well, I mean, I won over the Saints fans because I thought Bountygate was bullshit and said so.

I won over Patriots fans for a while because I thought Deflategate was bullshit.

and said so.

And really, anytime the NFL goes after one of these teams, that's when I have an opportunity to start looking for the bullshit.

And more often than not i find it now it doesn't win me any fans at 345 park avenue that's a different story altogether but the fan bases that feel persecuted by the league those are the ones that end up aligning with me because i feel like far more often than not the league has some agenda and they clumsily investigate these cases and they make an example out of someone and And it ends up being something that was just handled in a very pissed poor way.

So maybe

can you give me a little bit of news that'll make me happy with you?

That'll make me like, yeah, I love Florio.

He's always right about everything.

Can you just tell me that Snyder is going to have to sell the team, that Jim Ursa, the power play that he's putting on Dan Snyder is going to work?

Well, I think what needs to happen there is we all need to keep pressuring the league to do the right thing and be objective and fair because the Beth Wilkinson investigation would have resulted in a report if they had actually asked her for a written report.

that would have included a recommendation that he be forced to sell the team.

And the league brushed that under the rug because they didn't want to take on Dan Snyder at the time.

And I think the concern was the league didn't want to set a precedent that could be used against other owners, where you have one disgruntled employee who complains loudly enough, they feel compelled to have an investigation, and then the investigator starts finding all these shit.

And the next thing you know, the owner's got to sell.

They don't want that coming back around and being used against them.

And also, this idea from the ESPN report of a couple of weeks ago that there's a concern that Snyder's got dirt on people, that he's ready to unleash, that's part of it, too.

I just think that there's a chance, and Albert Breer mentioned this the other day, that this all gets brushed under the rug with the Mary Joe White investigation, that they find that the claim made by Tiffany Johnston that sparked the Mary Joe White investigation, that goes nowhere.

The notion that money was being moved around in a way that screwed the other owners, that is inconclusive.

And they just don't go after Dan Snyder.

If they go after this guy, it's going to be expensive.

It's going to take time because he's going to dig in.

He's already dug in.

And

I think some owners too,

I think they like the fact

that

the commanders are dysfunctional.

Big cat, you always say dysfunctional teams do dysfunctional things.

So, hey, what a shock.

Jerry Jones wants Dan Snyder to be in place because he's more likely to kick the shit out of the commanders twice a year if that's the case.

And there are owners who like having bad owners and dysfunctional teams because it's easier to win games if you know there's a cluster of teams out there that are run by bad ownership.

So,

I look, I like what RC has done, and I think the time has come for Dan Snyder to be gone.

Yep, but it's not going to be as easy.

And I think we all need to keep pushing and pushing and pushing the NFL to do the right thing.

It's my theory about the ownerships in all major sports, but the NFL in particular, there are a group of owners that don't have any desire.

They have desire to win a Super Bowl, but they will never take the steps to actually win a Super Bowl.

They're hoping they'll luck into one, and

you basically can take advantage of those teams every single year.

So speaking of my team, is Virginia McCasky, when she passes away, she might live forever.

I hope she does live forever.

Will the Bears sell and move to Arlington Heights?

Because I've always assumed that's a two-part thing where the Bears are going to move because some rich person is going to come and buy the team and the land because they want to own their own stadium.

Is that going to happen, you think?

think?

Here's one of the big realities, and it's happened from time to time.

It happened with the Commanders when Jack Kent Cook had to sell to Snyder.

The franchise value rises to the point where when you throw it in with the rest of the estate and someone in the family inherits it, they got to come up with 40% of the total value of the estate to give to the federal government.

And as these values are going up and up and up, Broncos went for 4.65 billion.

The Seahawks, I think, will go for 5 billion plus when they're sold.

And I think they will be sold in May of 2024 at or about that time.

And the values keep going up because of all the money that's coming in from gambling and the increased TV money.

And it's just more and more and more.

So the point is this.

Unless the McCaskies have a very good plan in place to transfer equity when she passes.

They may be in a position where they get a tax bill that the only way they can pay it is to sell the team.

That's what happened to Jack Kent Cook.

It happened to Joe Robbie.

It's happened to others.

It may happen with the Raiders when Carol Davis passes.

These are realities that these families have to deal with, and it takes very careful planning and a lot of money to make it work.

So there's a chance that the Bears will be sold and this whole move to a new stadium, just part of making the team more attractive, because if we're going to have to cash out, let's maximize what we can get for this franchise.

Yeah.

All right.

Your team,

they're not real, right?

No, they're not.

Okay, I agree with you.

Okay.

I agree with you.

All right, because we deal with crazy Vikings fans all the time.

Kirk Cousins stands.

They look at box scores.

They're a nice team.

They're not.

He's a nice guy.

He's a nice guy.

They'll lose in the divisional round.

I'm on with Paul Allen, the voice of the Vikings, every Wednesday morning at 10 Eastern.

And I've told him this all year.

This is a team that's going to go 11 and 6, maybe 12 and 5.

Who knows?

And they're going to win in the wild card round if they're lucky.

And then they get the shit kicked out of them by the Eagles or the Cowboys or one of the the elite teams in the nfc because cousins is limited if everything's perfect cousins can get it done when things start to fall apart he's done when the running game isn't there he's done and the defense isn't nearly good enough to make up for an offense that isn't where it needs to be and everybody thought oh kevin o'connell comes in now he's going to transfer kirk cousins he is who he is he's been around for 10 years so divisional round they'll lose And it'll continue as long as Kirk Cousins is their quarterback.

Yeah, that makes sense.

Yep.

Mike, I want to thank you.

We've been busting your balls a little bit, but sincerely, thank you for being the voice of reason or sometimes unreasonability on football night in America where you have to do your picks for the games, and you seem to be the guy that will not let everyone across the board take the same team.

True.

So thank you for that.

That being said,

you have a very difficult assignment.

This Sunday night because it's going to be the Bills and the Packers.

And we want the Bills to kick the shit out of the Packers.

But I'm pretty sure that everyone is going to pick the Bills.

So I'm hereby humbly asking you to just bite the bullet for America and pick the Packers so it's not all Bills' logos before the game.

Because you think if it's all Bills' logos, the Packers win.

Yes, no, we don't think.

We know.

Yeah.

Well, I took the Steelers to beat the Dolphins this past week.

I was the only one.

Cowboys to pick.

to beat the Eagles the week before I was the only one.

And you're right.

I took the bullet and everybody else was made to look good.

Fuck it.

I'm not doing it this week with the Packers.

Somebody else would have to do it.

Mike, come on.

Why are you Tony Dungee?

Mike, if the Packers win this game, I'm going to, I'm going to curse you.

I'm going to curse your barn.

I will.

I will curse your barn.

Do you want to pick up?

And you know,

crazier things have happened.

We've seen it.

It happens every week.

Sounds like you want to pick him.

Well, maybe I do.

I don't know.

Let's talk him into it, though.

And then Sunday night.

Like Aaron Rodgers, this is do or die time for him.

It's always around this time of year that the media buries Aaron Rodgers and they say, oh, he's washed up.

He doesn't have the weapons at receiver.

He's mad at his coach.

He's dysfunctional.

He's a real asshole that nobody likes hanging out with.

And then guess what happens?

A criminal.

He's a criminal.

He goes on a little tear.

He goes on a little tear.

Let me tell you something, though, though.

Watch R-E-L-A-X, Mike.

Here's what I think is legitimate as it relates to the Packers.

I think it's better for them to struggle.

and then get into the postseason as like a six or a seven seed.

They won the Super Bowl in 2010 as the sixth seed.

I think there's a very real psychological lift in being the team that nobody expects anything from.

We got nothing to lose.

Let's just go play.

When they're the one seed, they seize up.

They think too much.

Aaron Rodgers is too careful.

We put all this work in to be the one seed.

And oh my God, it's slipping away in a three-hour window at Lambeau Field.

I really do think they're more dangerous if they get in by the skin of their teeth.

than if they rebound and win the division.

All right.

Well, I don't want them to be more dangerous.

So just pick them.

Just pick them on the ship.

42 to 10.

Bills win.

I'm sorry.

I can't do it.

Bills are going to kick the shit.

I want a close game for NBC purposes.

No.

I think the Bills are going to kick the shit.

I want them to kill them.

I want the Bills to just, I want it to be just the best three hours of my life.

I want Josh Allen to throw for 600 yards.

How come no one set the all-time passing record in like 70 years?

What's up with that?

Isn't that amazing?

Norm Van Brockland, 554 yards back in 1951 against the New York Yanks, and it was a blowout.

It wasn't like a a game where they had to keep scoring points.

And it was in an age where the game wasn't built for throwing and it's lasted this long.

Joe Burrow got 525 a couple of years ago.

He had 481.

There was a game, 2020, Bucs Lions, a Saturday game, where they took Tom Brady out at halftime and he was on pace for like 700 yards.

So I feel like it's going to happen one of these days.

It really is.

ridiculous.

It's been that long and it goes back to Norm Van Brockland in 1951.

It's It's crazy.

Okay, so Mike, the game's about to start.

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This has been a lot of fun catching up with you.

We probably have waited too long.

We're going to have to have you back on again this season.

But we do our stardom, sit-em-sleeper

every Friday.

So we're going to do it right now.

Whether you want to do it with us or not.

We do actually do this.

Whether we want a real Italian on with us.

So whether you want to do it with us or not.

Yeah, whether, yeah, we're going to do it with us.

Why are Italians the only people that can still be made fun of?

Why is that?

Because you're ridiculous.

How do we fall in this sweet spot?

The most

people can be made fun of.

Yeah.

Well, because you guys are funny people.

And listen.

You know why?

I actually...

Because Italians can take it.

Yeah.

Mike, no bump balls back.

I'm an ally, Mike.

Both my children are a quarter Italian, so I'm allowed to make all these jokes.

And I'm 1% Sicilian, I'll have you know.

Yeah,

I'm allowed to do all this.

We have our producer, Max.

He's as Italian as it gets.

He sweats grease.

I had to add one Italian to the crew.

Happy to be here.

Yeah, see, that's Max.

So his last name ends in a vowel.

You're ready to go.

Okay, Hank, you want to do your starting?

Yeah, Yeah, what's up?

It's fucking Excobar Mario Crystal Ball.

Hey, what's up, X?

My startup is Matthew Perry.

Yeah, a weirdo.

He said he wants fucking Keanu Reed to die.

He's all up in the news.

He's everywhere this week.

My sit him is Jamar Chase.

Yeah, I sit him.

He's at it.

Oh, he can't sit it.

Four to six.

Tragically hit.

That hit.

Hipsters.

Yeah, what do you think about that, Mike?

Yeah, I have no comment.

And my sleep is Stogies.

Stogies.

Stogies and the boys.

Yeah, you get to go in the back.

Yeah, go in the bond, barn, fucking rip a couple stoges.

Yeah, in the barn.

Yeah.

Real Italian shit.

Real Italian shit.

Hey, hey, what's up?

This is Mikey Pauly.

Hey, Mikey Pauly.

That's my name, too.

Yeah, Mikey Paulie.

Oh, I'm Paulie Mikey.

I'm Mikey Paulie.

I got to promote something.

Hold on one sec.

You can do it in your starter.

You can do it in your starter.

You can talk about your little side thing.

Your little thing, your little dad.

Hey, I get a cut.

Hey, hey, hey.

Don't forget my cut.

Hey.

Get a little cut.

Hey, Yogi, you'll get the Yogi a chance.

I'll send the fellas out.

Hey, what's up, Mikey Pauly?

Oh, hey, what's up, Mikey Pauly?

I'm sad in trains this weekend.

I'm going to go sit on a train for a while.

I love it.

Nice, smooth train ride.

Nothing like it.

Don't go to the store.

Yeah, train stores.

Bad stuff happens.

Get greased.

I'm sitting Antonio Gibson.

I think he's kind of a bum.

I think he's got the fumbolitis.

And they're going to keep sitting him.

It's going to be B-Rob.

That's another guy.

Brian Robinson stays out of train stores too, if you know what I'm saying.

I'm sleeping meditation podcasts.

It's a real comfortable way to fall asleep at night.

You listen to a little guy tell you a little story about a whale.

He reads Moby Dick to you, and sooner or later, you are the one that's sleeping.

I like it.

I like it.

All right, what's up, guys?

It's Pauli Mikey.

Hey, Paul, Mikey.

Paulie Mikey.

I'm starting Kenneth Walker.

He's my guy.

Seahawks.

Big 10.

Runs the football.

Knows how to get yards.

Mikey, Kenneth Walker, stot him, stot him, stop him.

Mike, Sid him, I'm sitting real real doctors.

Oh my god, the Bucks.

Oh my god.

They just ran into each other.

They just ran into each other.

Hey, these two

is going the other.

What do you mean for me?

The Raven's like, hey, nevermore.

So my sitem is doctors.

Real doctors suck.

Real doctors are actually 10x doctors.

Quacks.

Biologists, you know, that's the real life.

And then my sleeper is anyone's bond that

picks the bills on Sunday night.

Would be a real shame.

Real shame.

Real shame if that bond went up and smoked.

You got an insurance policy on that thing?

Yeah.

Okay, and now Billy, Billy, go ahead.

Hey, yo, I'm not filming for this page.

Hey, no,

hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.

Listen.

Hey, it's

Genzo Allegro.

And my stardom.

My stardom is, you know, you ever hear about this guy, Sam Ellinger?

Yeah.

Yeah.

He's a guy.

He's a top runner.

He's a guy.

You hear around, you know, around and you hear some things.

Yeah, my sit-em.

You know, Franklin Delano Roosevelt?

Yeah.

You know that he couldn't stand?

You sit in FDR.

I think he took care of that one for you.

Yeah, you know.

Allegedly.

Turns out, couldn't stand.

Heard it from a guy.

But I was around, heard it from a guy.

And then my sleeper,

Katie Perry's eye.

Oh, not good.

No.

Sleepy eye.

Yeah, very winky blue.

Very sleepy.

No, a little dodgy.

You see something like that?

A little sleepy.

Just got something to check out.

Yeah.

Just check it out.

Not too hard, though.

Just let it sleep.

All right, Mike, go ahead.

What's your name?

I'm not doing it.

I'm not doing it.

You're a collaborate.

No, it's not.

It's not.

Calculated.

It is not.

We do this every Friday.

You yell at me, nobody gives a fucking thing.

No, the moment I start doing it, that's what you're going to do.

I have lived through this.

You're five fucking years.

Have you ever listened to the show?

We do this.

We don't listen to our Friday show.

We do this every Friday.

I listen to your Friday.

Yeah, we do this every Friday.

All right, so what's your thing you got to plug?

Your starter.

Okay,

I'm not plugging anything.

Oh, start buying Playmakers.

Okay, Sit Patrick Mahomes.

He's on a buy this week.

Okay, nice.

This is my

cover, along with Bill Belichick.

Start Bill Belichick in the Coaches Fantasy League this week.

Okay.

Get Playmakers.

Special promotion on Tuesday.

A special promotion if you buy it on Tuesday.

You got to buy it on Tuesday.

Special promotion, Tuesday, the 21st anniversary of PFT.

Not many people know about it, but the AWLs are clued in.

Yes.

A special promotion if you buy it on Tuesday.

Show up Tuesday and buy it.

And if you don't buy it, we'll sleep you.

We will literally murder you.

That's a fact.

That's a guarantee.

Right, Mike?

You, as our lawyer, you say that we can murder people, right?

Sure, that's fine.

It's a long Italian tradition to pay people off on Election Day.

I'm glad that you're keeping that up.

Like it, Mike.

Mike, thank you.

We really do do that every Friday.

We talked about it.

Okay, I didn't know.

I just, but there's no way.

There's no way.

You saw my text.

I had a high-level meeting in New York City late August.

And it crossed my mind on the way to the meeting that this is some fucking thing Big Cat set up.

So there'll be a question about my fantasy team and they're going to swoop in out of nowhere and say nobody gives a shit.

Well, to be honest with you, we were, you know, I was thinking about different things to do.

And then I was like, isn't the best way to get Florio this year is just to have him constantly thinking we're about to get him for all of August and then not get him.

It worked.

It worked.

It worked.

It was beautiful.

It was beautiful.

All right.

Well, Mike, thank you as always.

Everyone go by Playmakers.

Tune into Mike.

He's been doing it for 21 years.

We love you.

Congratulations, Mike.

Sincerely,

as much shit as we give you, we do love you.

And always, always love that you have our back.

We have your back.

It's family, you know?

It's our thing.

Hey, Gabagoo.

There it is.

All right.

Thanks, Mike.

Thanks, Mike.

Hey, guys, it's Rhea from Chicks in the Office.

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Okay, weekend preview time, week eight.

It's not halfway.

We're almost halfway, but we're not halfway.

It is kind of crazy that we're already in week eight.

We're already done with October after this week.

We're not going to do the thing where we get scared about the season ending, but it's starting to trickle in my head.

That's all I'm going to say.

It's not 16 games anymore, though.

I know.

That's what I'm saying.

We're not halfway.

We get the full nother week.

We have 18 weeks, so next week is halfway.

And even if it was 16 games, we're not there yet because guess what?

It's not Monday yet i think we still have this week of games the two things that always get me to be like whoa football's not going to last forever is when we change the clocks which is this weekend and when october ends because then you get it feels like october i know that it makes no sense because we obviously play football all throughout january and february but in my head September, October, November, December, those are the four quarters of the season.

Yeah, it is the start of scorebug update season.

So we're going to see the jack-o'-lanterns on the scoreboards.

We're going to see the leaves falling.

Monday night's the best color matchup ever for Halloween.

Well, I wish it had been the Commanders in the Black and the Bears and the Orange.

Oh, that would have been the spookiest matchup of all time.

I don't want to watch that game again.

It was scary.

Yeah.

It was a very frightening game, not for children.

Yeah.

But next, and then next week, we're going to start cornucopia season with the big, the horn that's got the squash coming out of it.

It's the apples, the leaves.

This is football season.

It's football season.

It is football season.

We're in week eight.

Jake, Jake, give us our standings, and then we're going to talk about every game.

Some good games this week,

also some bad games.

Go ahead.

We have a new leader.

It's you.

Oh, three and one.

I'm interesting how Big Cat goes 0-4.

I mean, I ask him, I do the same thing every week.

Very pumped up about this.

Every week.

So we have had an 0-4 participant every week, which is kind of crazy.

Hank takes the honor this week.

So Big Cat at 14 and 14.

Nice.

You are a strong leader.

It's awesome.

This is like the U.S.

Open when the leader's plus two.

Yeah, no, the course has been tough this year.

Yeah.

Tough course.

Shout out to the course.

It's been

really good.

Big Cat at 14 and 14.

Hank one behind at 13 and 15.

Max and Billy at 11 and 17.

Me and PFT at 10 and 18.

So the whole group, four-game separation, still anyone's game.

Still anyone's game?

Truly is.

It truly is.

Listen, we're not even halfway done through the season right now, so it's pointless to say who's in first place and who's in last.

Should we talk real quick?

We're going to go through all the games, but we should at least address before we go through these games, the Russell Wilson

going to England and doing calisthenics on the plane.

Just in all time, every time I think Russell Wilson will have a revelation being like, hey, maybe I'm doing too much.

He's like, no, I'm going to do even more.

No, well, that's the thing.

Like, he thinks that the way out of this hole that he's created for himself is to do everything that he has doing except harder.

Yeah.

So he's just leaning more and more into the Russell Wilson of the idea of what he thinks that a QB1 should be doing to lead their team.

Yes.

And I don't think like he doesn't have buy-in from his teammates because you can do this kind of shit if you're winning and it's kind of like quirky.

It's like, oh, that's Russell Wilson.

He's a weirdo, but it's working.

You can't argue with the results.

But when you start to lose while you're doing all this weird shit, I remember RG3 in his rookie year, he started asking all the veterans, like, what's your why?

Know your why.

Why do you play football?

And they started to win.

Everybody was like, this rookie is precocious, but he's getting the job done.

Then once things start to fall apart, it's like, I fucking hate this.

And the why is we're getting paid.

Yeah, we want money.

Everyone wants the money.

And Russell Wilson has his money, so he probably annoys the fuck out of everyone even more, knowing that they're still trying to get their money.

He has his money.

The report, if you missed it, was that Russell Wilson on an eight-hour flight from Denver to London

did

high knees and stretching for four hours while the rest of the team slept.

So initially I was like, well, that's weird because if everyone was sleeping, who told the reporters?

Then I saw that Russell Wilson was the one who obviously told the reporters.

And he actually, the quote was actually worse because what he said to the reporters was, for the first two hours, I watched

film.

Then when everyone slept, so he's basically throwing his whole team under the bus, I did high knees and kept stretching.

Then the last two hours,

he started to say that he took a nap, and then he's like, well, I slept for an hour and then I watched more film.

So basically, in an eight-hour flight, he's only copping to one hour of sleep and the rest of it, he was working his ass off and stretching and doing everything to make sure that he's ready.

And again, I like the actual act of keeping loose and making sure his hamstrings are ready for the game, that's fine.

It's telling everyone that that's what you did.

That is so ridiculous.

I think four hours of high knees is just simply too many hours.

That is,

I think maybe four minutes of high knees is the most that anyone should ever do.

After that,

you're just showing off.

He's doing the thing where he was doing the, like, this is the first football pass.

He was like, these are the highest knees of all time that I'm able to do because I'm on an airplane.

And it's, I'm really getting it.

If I was that pilot, I would have, and I saw somebody doing high knees for four hours.

I, no disrespect, I would have caught the German wings flu.

Yes.

And I would have been like, okay, we're going down.

Yeah, we're going down right now.

His body must be like just begging him for a break, too.

It's like the inverse of my body, where every now and then my body will tell me like, hey, maybe today you should like try to lift a weight or get your heart rate up for a second.

Just let's feel good for a second.

His body's like, hey, Russ, maybe let's just sit on the couch and eat a potato chip once instead of every fucking waking hour making me do something that I don't want to do.

That's what his body, his body's screaming for help.

I can almost guarantee you that Russ Wilson in the course of the next two years will enter in with a partnership with a mattress company that eliminates the big weakness in sleep.

There's an inefficiency in sleeping, big cat.

You can't work out while you're asleep.

Yes.

He'll figure out some way to make sleeping a workout.

Yes.

And then he'll be like, it's me, Russell Wilson.

Even when I'm sleeping, I'm still grinding.

Yes.

Get your hands on the Russ mattress.

I could absolutely

have

something.

Okay, so let's do our picks.

We'll talk about every game, but we had to address that.

We'll start with our favorites.

What about the Robert Quinn trade?

Oh, yeah.

Well, I had it under the Bears Cowboys.

If we discuss that game,

I will discuss that game.

Okay, so

you're taking the Cowboys?

I'm taking the Bears.

Oh, no, you're doing favorites first.

Okay.

Yeah, favorites first.

But the Robert Quinn trade,

I still don't think people under, and I put myself in this camp, I don't understand how the cap works.

I don't understand

trade value in the NFL because everyone always, like, whenever someone gets traded, they're like, that's all you got?

The Bears are not

a contender right now.

They They have to rebuild.

They have to get as many picks as possible.

They're beating up on shitty teams, but that doesn't mean that they're a good team.

Don't delude ourselves.

Robert Quinn is 32 years old, had an incredible year last year, has been okay this year.

The last couple weeks has been better.

There's no reason if you are Ryan Poles,

if this is a tear it down and build it back up, a 32-year-old defensive lineman is not part of the future.

Get as many picks as you can.

Do it right now.

I think it's actually great for the Eagles as well because now they have depth at the pass rusher position, which would be the one thing you could say, like, oh, their defense is great against the run, all these things.

They probably need to get the quarterback more.

I love the trade, and everyone will just shit on like, all you got is a fourth.

I actually think that's pretty good value.

It's like the Khalil Mack trade.

Like, when guys get older, you don't get a lot for him.

You just don't.

Because draft picks are very, very hard.

How many years did he have again?

I don't know when he can get cut.

I know they save some money on the cap, future cap,

but it's a smart trade because you need as many picks as you can.

And I posed a question to Twitter yesterday because there was one person who was like, the Bears should have traded Roquan for two firsts.

And I was like, first of all, Roquan, I don't think, gets one first because he's an off-ball linebacker, which is not a premier position.

But the amount of guys in the NFL that would get two firsts that are non-quarterbacks.

The list is probably 10 to 15.

Aaron Donald.

I don't even know because he almost retires every year.

That's true.

Yeah, like it's

McDonald three years ago.

Right.

It's pretty much guys who are on their first contract.

Like, it's Micah Parsons.

Maybe some coaches.

Maybe Sean McVay.

Yeah, maybe Sean.

He also almost retires, too.

TJ Watt, people were throwing out Justin Jefferson, Jamar Chase.

Those are good answers.

Sam Bradford.

It's a very small list of guys.

I think John QB.

I know, but I think Sam Bradford, didn't he get traded for multiple first-round picks over the course of his career?

He did.

But the list, like, and then people are like, well, what about Jamal Adams?

Jamal Adams was an atrocious trade at the time.

Joe Douglas fleeced the Seahawks, and we all thought that at the time.

So,

yeah, I'm cool with the trade.

I wish the timing was different.

That's all I'll say.

Because you saw Roquan Smith kind of get teary-eyed in the press conference.

The Bears just have their biggest win in a long time.

And then you trade Robert Quinn.

That has to hurt the locker room a little to be like, yeah,

we're not actually competing for anything this year.

You're probably selling at the highest point, though.

Yeah.

It's like, when are you going to get another prime?

deadline too?

Yeah.

So, but that's the only, that was my only critique of it.

All right, so let's do the picks.

Favorite?

Green Bay Packers.

I mean, Buffalo Bills playing the Green Bay Packers.

They're minus 10 and a half.

I'm confused with the favorites and underdog thing here.

Yeah.

It does feel like a shit pumping waiting to happen.

I'm so excited.

It feels like

I'm going shock for my favorite and shock for my underdog.

Just the biggest.

biggest of both worlds.

It feels like everything is about to implode for the Green Bay Packers.

Like this feels like the second before it all comes crumbling.

Aaron Rodgers is saying his teammates aren't trying, or there's 20% of plays where they're just lapsing judgment or lapsing, like paying attention.

So that can't help.

This game has a personal spot

in my heart because this is actually how I became an honorary member of Bills Mafia.

2014,

the Bears were terrible.

I think it was the second year of Tressman.

The Packers were very good.

They went to Buffalo.

It was Kyle Orton.

The Bills beat the Packers in week 15, essentially stopped them from getting the one seed.

So then they had to go play that NFC championship game in Seattle.

And I went back and I looked at my tweets.

That was the day that I was like, is being a Bills fan always this fun?

They were a shitty team then.

And I was tweeting Bill's mafia.

And that was a perpetually shitty era for them.

Yes.

And I remember I went and looked at my tweets and I was like, I'm part of Bills Mafia today because this is going to be the best moment of the Bears 2014 season is the Packers losing the one seed to a bad Buffalo team.

And so I love this game.

I love this game.

I love what the Bills did for me that year, and I'll forever love the Bills for that.

And also, this is the first time that Aaron Rodgers in 234 regular season and postseason starts is a double-digit underdog.

That's crazy.

Longest streak ever for a quarterback to start their career

to never be a two-digit

underdog.

That is crazy.

So you're taking the Bills.

I will be taking the the bills.

They're not my pick, but I will be taking the bills.

It feels like

this is the moment where it does.

Everything's adding up to it.

Like, even LaFleur is saying, like, yeah, I deserve all this criticism.

I've sucked myself.

So he's even admitting that there's some problems going into it.

They don't really have that many weapons on offense.

They should run the ball a lot more than they do, but they don't.

Aaron Jones should be featured more.

They're just not going to.

You should give the ball to A.J.

Dillon.

You should give the ball to Aaron Jones.

Is Dylan hurt?

I don't think so.

So they should just run the fucking ball more because they don't have the weapons on the even if even if they wanted to pass the ball more, I don't think Aaron Rodgers wants to throw the ball to those bums on the outside.

I think he thinks they're bums.

Yeah.

And also the Bills riding high off the momentum of releasing the new pictures of their stadium, which looks awesome.

There's no dome on it.

Josh Allen is an outdoor cat.

Look very cool.

I'm sorry, Kurt Warner.

He's going to be playing outdoors for the rest of his career.

I love it.

The giant buffalo outside the stadium were awesome.

Yep.

They've got

three giant fucking brass buffalo with balls hanging off their legs.

Just right, they need to be bigger, though.

I want

the buffalo outside the stadium to be bigger than the actual stadium itself.

I agree.

It should be like something that NASA can see from space.

Yes.

They're like, look at that.

You see the Great Wall of China?

How about the Buffalo in Buffalo?

Yeah, I want it to turn into like a tourist attraction.

People go up to Buffalo to see the giant fucking buffalo.

Yep.

Probably Bill's mafia climbs it after big victories.

There'll definitely be somebody that tries to jump off that buffalo into a table.

They're going to have to rope it off.

Yeah.

They're going to have to put a big, big gate around it.

Or just a lifeguard.

Have Pinto Ron on a lifeguard stand.

Sitting on the buffalo.

Sitting on the buffalo, and he just squirts ketchup at you if you try to climb up it.

Yes.

Josh Allen also 10-3 against the spread in primetime.

Pretty good.

I'm going to love this game.

This game is going to be erotic for me.

I want them to absolutely punish the Packers.

Okay, that's your favorite.

Max, your favorite?

Falcons minus four and a half.

Okay.

the panthers i think the panthers stink i think the falcons are good and i think that line is low which scares me but low this is falcons it's the first time that the falcons are favorites this year i believe yes i will when we get to under our underdogs i'm against you on this i'm now buying what i was reading up about the panthers i guess i can just talk about it right now away of the panther um I didn't realize that Steve Wilkes is from Charlotte.

That's a big miss on my part.

I didn't know that either.

Yeah, Yeah, interim head coach from Charlotte.

Guys, afterwards, David Tepper gave him a game ball after the win against the Bucs.

They're all talking, like, the locker room is talking about how he got screwed in Arizona and they want him to have the job and they're playing for him.

And they're like, he means a lot to this franchise, to the city.

It's also crazy to say, this is a nuts thing, but just follow me here.

David Tepper was on the Carolina staff when they won the NFC South at 7-8-1 that year in 2014.

Remember, Ron Rivera talked about it in his press conference after he got fired, which was very bizarre.

If the Panthers beat the Falcons and the Raiders beat the Saints and we'll already know if the Bucs won or not, say they lost, the Panthers would be in first place, which is insane.

That is crazy.

That's insane to think about.

That they could be in first place in the NFC South on Sunday night.

That is nuts.

But that's stupid.

But that's stupid.

That means, though, the only reason I'm saying that is because when I saw these quotes being like, we're playing for them, we're dying for them, we want them to get the job, I was like, what do they care?

They're out of it.

And then I was like, wait, are they out of it?

And they are out of it, but they're also technically not.

They're not mathematically out of it.

Right, right, right.

But they're out of it, out of it.

But you can delude all the good players.

Right.

You can delude yourself in being like, we're not out of it because mathematically we would be in first place on Sunday afternoon.

Yeah.

Don't forget, though, that the Falcons had an extra half of practice to get ready for this Panthers game in the second half of their game against the Bengals last week, where they just decided we're not going to pass the ball.

We're going to just implement, we're going to do our first half script against the Packers, or against the Panthers in the second half of our game against the Bengals, where they threw 13 total passes after losing by 18 points, or while losing by 18 points.

The Arthur Smith Coach of the Year Buzz is picking up stage.

It is.

It is.

It's going to be tough to beat Brian Dable.

It's going to be very tough to beat Brian Dable.

However,

you never know.

Yeah, I'm down.

I'm going to get it going.

Yeah.

I think he should be in the discussion.

Absolutely.

He's in the discussion right now.

Do they have finalists for it?

Do they get like a bunch of coaches together or do they just pick?

Do they just say...

Well, we have a vote.

So let's just give our vote to Arthur Smith right now.

I think we should split it.

Okay.

Arthur Smith and Dable.

Okay, perfect.

Okay, so in the discussion.

So we're going to, one way we're going to win this.

So yeah.

The Panthers are going to be my underdog.

Yeah, I hate it.

It's fine.

I'm a weird thing.

It's fine.

I hate it.

The Charlotte part, I'm so mad at myself because I consider consider myself a little bit of a guru on interim coaches come in, and I just somehow missed that part.

Well, it's because we were so excited about the possibility of getting Ben Mackenzie as the head coach that we completely overlooked Steve Wilkes.

I know.

And now these guys are believing and getting a game ball from the owner.

Are they pounding the drum?

Are they bringing back the keep pounding?

I don't know.

I'm just.

I'm starting to believe in this Panthers team to not be terrible.

I want to clarify.

I do not think they're good.

I do not think they're going to go to the playoffs.

I do not think they're going to win win more than like six or seven, six games, maybe four more games.

But not being

the worst team and being like just a little bit better than the worst team is a big difference.

I like PJ Walker.

Yeah.

He's fun.

He is fun.

PJ Walker and Heineke leading the XFL resurgence.

Yes.

All right.

Your favorite, PFT.

My favorite favorite going into this weekend.

I want to be a basic bitch,

but I'm not going to.

I'm going to take the Pats.

I'm taking the Patriots.

So, Belichick is something like 34-15 against the spread after losing as a favorite.

He's also 35-11 straight up against the Jets in his career.

Yeah, and I don't think he's lost against the Jets since 2008.

15.

15.

I think it's six years.

It's 12 straight.

That's a lot of straight.

So it's 12 straight.

I can never do years.

All the hot take shows out there are going to be talking incessantly about like Mac Jones, Bailey Zapping, The Wire.

Which one?

Which one are we going to

talk about?

The wire.

I've seen a lot of people talking about it.

What do you mean, the wire, Hank?

The wire that Mac Jones is.

ESPN's Monday Night Football cam, the wire for it, the sky cam, Mac Jones' ball hit it.

Technically, by NFL rules, if a ball hits an unconstructed, like non-part of the game, then the play is called dead.

The ball was clearly going out of bounds.

He was throwing it away.

It hit the wire, came back inbounds, and was intercepted.

Okay.

Then Bailey Zappi got put in.

So

not to go all Alex Jones on you, but

it just so happened that Barack Obama was on the Manning cast at the exact time that his beloved Bears got a drone interference penalty

against the Patriots.

I'm just looking at the documents.

It's adding up a little bit.

But Hank, what I'm saying is, like, you'll hear, you probably want me to talk about Mac Jones and Bailey Zappi.

That's what you see on TV.

You see all the lame talk shows are just trying to get clicks and talk about a quarterback controversy.

I want to talk about the Patriots' defense because the Patriots' defense, I think, is going to befuddle Zach Wilson Wilson.

Zach Wilson is going to be befuddled this weekend.

He's going to be so confused.

Belichick knows how to fuck with befuddled quarterbacks, and Zach Wilson, I think, is

one of the more befuddle-able quarterbacks in the NFL.

They made Dartled C ghosts.

Yeah, and obviously, Brees Hall injury hurts.

Their offensive tackle also out for the year.

Kind of sucks for the Jets.

They've had some injury bug.

They traded for James Robinson.

How are we feeling about James Robinson?

Good.

I mean, the Jets running.

That's actually a perfect answer.

Yeah, okay.

Yeah.

Yeah.

The Jets are good.

I did read.

I mean, Michael Carter is good.

Yeah, Michael Carter is good.

I don't.

James Robinson is okay.

He's good.

But in Michael Carter, I think he's going to get more reps, and he's also, I think, been overshadowed by Brees Hall.

Okay.

So him getting more reps, I think we're going to see him explode.

I think your offensive line injuries are low-key more important than the Brees Hall injuries.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah.

Cracker Barrel is home to all the more country anytime.

That means buttermilk pancakes whenever you want them, homemade classics like chicken and dumplings, and a country store full of fun finds.

Swing by and visit Cracker Barrel today.

I do really want to go.

Okay, then go.

I actually got tickets already.

We got to work.

No, you and Billy should go.

Yeah, no, I actually have the tickets already.

We should go.

Hank, you should go.

I would.

Hank, we're going.

I got to work.

No, no, no.

I'll wake you up on Sunday.

We'll go.

He's got to work.

Are you scared that you're going to lose?

You're wearing green right now.

Uh-oh.

I am wearing green.

He's got you.

I'm team black, though.

I am wearing green right now.

Fucking Amen.

If you really like your pats, you should go.

I, dude, Billy, I really like the pats.

I just like, I'm a workhorse.

I don't know what you want me to say.

I just got to

game a lot.

Content.

We work.

Workhorse.

We work.

He's a workhorse.

Yeah.

Okay.

All right, so you have the Patriots.

Yeah, I got the Patreon.

I don't care.

Yeah, I got the Patriots minus two and a half.

Okay.

Billy should go.

I am going to.

Jake, you you should go in my stead.

It's a big game.

Billy, it's a big game.

You got to.

This is like

all the good vibes on the Jets season kind of is a make or break in the next three weeks.

I know.

I have no problem with Billy.

I went to like three or four past Jets games, and they are all disappointing when we first moved here.

Like, I have no interest in going to the Metal Land.

Because you beat him so bad?

If it was a night game.

This might be a little more exciting.

Monday night game.

I think Hank's scared.

You're scared.

He's a workhorse.

I'm getting scared by him.

I am a workhorse, and

corporate life never sleeps, but I love watching all the other games.

I don't like being at one game on Sunday, knowing there's other games going on.

And then having to work after.

If it was a normal Sunday where we could just go to the game, get shit face and go, and then go home and go to sleep.

Different story.

Yeah.

But like going to the game, missing all the other games, and then having to come to work for the rest of the night.

Brutal.

But you're not scared.

Not scared.

Not scared.

Okay.

My favorites, I'm going to take the 49ers minus one and a half.

I assume that was who you're going to be if you were basic.

Yeah, no, I agree with you.

But also, at some point, I feel like every time this happens, it's like if you really enjoy a band and then they get mainstream and everybody, like they're on the radio, everyone's talking about it.

It's like we've known for a while that Shanahan owns McVay.

Yeah.

And now everyone's talking about it.

It's like, if you like Shanahan so much, name three of his old running backs.

But it's, it's, I don't, I just can't, like, he's eight and four against McVay overall, straight up.

And then, so one of the losses was the NFC Championship game that the Niners, if they don't drop the easiest interception ever, win that game, they still covered.

And then the other three losses, C.J.

Bethard, Nick Mullen, and Brian Hoyer, 2017 and 18, when the Niners were horrendous and the Rams were a Super Bowl.

They went to the Super Bowl in 18.

So it's not only that he like really owns it.

And I just,

I'm going to go back to the well.

I'm just going to keep doing it.

I keep betting the Niners.

I bet them the last few times they played the Rams.

I'm going going to keep doing it until something changes or something looks different for Sean McVay and the Rams against the Niners.

I'm going to take the Niners too.

I think that's a good bet because they also,

the Rams are missing some offensive linemen.

Yep.

Bose is coming back.

Bose is coming back.

I think Bose is going to feast.

Bose is coming back.

And what we saw in the NFC Championship game, this is...

This is a home game for the Niners.

Yeah.

There's like, it's going to be like 60, 70% Niners fans.

Yeah.

I also like McCaffrey.

Like, if he has two days to learn the playbook, imagine what he's going to know on nine days.

A couple special packages?

Hell yeah.

Yeah.

Okay.

That's my favorite.

Billy, your favorite.

This is a big weekend for me.

Chad Kelly's getting his first professional football start.

Sam Ellinger is also getting his first professional football start.

So all my picks are going to reflect all my takes.

You're playing against?

So I'm going, yeah.

There's a lot in the

reputation's on the line this weekend.

I know.

I know.

So we're going Colts minus three over the Commander.

So

you're making it worse now.

You're even like doubling down on your.

We're either going to be crashing and burning or celebrating.

I like that.

Just go all, yeah, put all your chips in the middle and just hope it works out.

On Sunday night, I might be in shambles.

Yeah.

So I'm very prepared for that.

Sam Ellinger, I think he's a mobile quarterback, enough to light up an offense.

We see these mobile quarterbacks getting first downs, extending drives.

I think the Colts are going to have the fire in their belly.

And also, as we heard,

the Commanders had a party on Monday night.

A Halloween party.

Halloween party.

So I don't think that's good in a good six-day hangout.

Yeah.

I mean,

alcohol has effects for like two weeks after you drink it.

That's true to certain football coaches.

Yeah, I know.

I can tell.

I can still hear it in your voice

from Saturday.

Yeah.

How was your Saturday?

It was great.

Yeah.

He got Chris Long drunk.

Oh, yeah.

At the Yankee game.

No, actually, Chris Long got him drunk.

That was a fib that Billy told.

No, Chris Long claims that because I went home early, it means that...

No, he got you drunk.

He paid for your drinks.

He didn't pay for my drinks.

And then you didn't pay for my drinks.

And then you left because you were so drunk.

No, because I had to wake up and do part of my take.

So Chris Long got you drunk, though.

Yeah.

For the wake up and do part of my take right away.

At 11.

Where you have to watch all the football.

All the football.

So you're agreeing with Hank?

What time?

He can't go to the game because you've got to watch all the football.

Yeah, well, I had to, like, imagine I didn't watch all the football.

Yeah.

Yeah.

You were here during the day.

Yeah, you were here.

I think you got here at like 5 o'clock that night.

So you didn't have to wake up until 4.

He was watching football.

He was working from home.

I was.

You guys don't play the jet game.

That is what Billy said.

He said

he was watching for the show better if he watches from home.

Wait, the jet game was in the afternoon.

Right.

That's why I watched it at home.

No, no, no.

It was on here.

You actually came.

You traveled in during the Jets game.

At halftime.

Okay.

It's unraveling for me.

But, Billy, I can't even be mad at you for taking the Colts in this.

The Colts are my second team.

They're my AFC team, pending Mr.

Ursay's deposition of Dan Snyder.

So I don't hate.

I don't know who to root for.

I mean, in a way, it's like, yeah, obviously I want the Commanders to win.

Obviously, I'm rooting for Taylor Heineke.

I really like him.

I want the team to do well.

But I can also reach that point where if the Colts end up beating the Commanders, I can spin myself into being like this season's all about next year anyways.

It's going to be interesting to watch Ellinger out there because we don't know what we're going to get.

I feel like it's been so long since we've seen him in a game that I have no idea what he's gonna look like against an NFL defense.

Yeah, he's been working with the starters all week.

So there we go.

Let's see what happens.

Okay, Jake, your favorite.

Are we bet?

Wait, are we betting a hot sauce sub-bet, Billy?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Okay.

Crashing and burning.

I like it.

Okay.

Doused.

A moderate dousage.

Medium dousage.

I mean, yeah,

you had it.

I doused it.

Yeah.

It was pretty bad right now.

Medium doused.

Medium douse.

Okay.

Jake.

I am taking my Miami Dolphins.

Minus three and a half at the Detroit Lions.

The Dolphins have yet to lose a football game with a healthy quarterback.

And the Lions, they are bad.

They are bad.

Skylar Thompson was healthy.

That is true.

True healthy starting quarterback.

Yeah, yeah.

Or a backup quarterback, a first backup quarterback.

So we had two vote of confidences this week from owners.

One was Nathaniel Hackett,

and then the other was

Dan Campbell.

So the Lions, I think she's the president, Sheila Hamp,

whatever, Martha Ford's daughter, came out, did a press conference.

My favorite quote from the whole press conference, she was talking about the rebuild, how painful it is.

She said, nobody hates losing more than I do, than my family does, but we've got to get through it.

I think they like losing.

Like, they lose a lot.

It's impossible for her to say that nobody hates losing more than me.

Right.

Because if that were true,

she would be hanging from a rope somewhere.

Right.

Like, that's to say you hate losing as the owner of the Lions,

I'm going to push back on that.

I think you almost get off on it.

You might be in the wrong line of business.

Yeah, right.

It's the one job where you just lose all the time.

Yeah, it's like if you work for Barstall and you're like, I hate going to football games.

Right.

It's like, well, it's kind of

our thing that works.

I hate tits and ass.

Yeah.

Not me.

I hate not knowing whose ass that is.

Does anybody know what company I can work for?

All right.

It was a crazy sentence for her to say, but yeah, she did come out and the impromptu press conference midweek to say we believe in Dan Campbell is always a bad sign.

This is a, I kind of like the dome dogs, though.

I like, I like

the Lions at home.

I do too.

Three and a half.

If it was three, I'd be thinking a little bit differently, but three and a half.

The dome dogs are going to be barking.

I also just think it's like, what is this world coming to?

if Mike McDaniel beats Dan Campbell in football.

Yeah.

You know?

It's a major the nerd.

Yeah, it's a major, like, it's battle of the heads.

It's pot versus meat.

Yeah.

Which one you got?

Yeah.

Go on meathead.

I also just like the Lions Cowboys game last week.

We watched that whole game.

I know that the final score says 24 to 6, but the Lions were in that game until they played very minutes.

Yeah.

Like if Micah Parsons isn't just a total freak and doesn't make that tackle at the goal line, the Lions could have won that game.

Yeah.

Also, they fumbled at the one-yard.

Yeah, right after Micah Parsons.

They were down 10-6 with three minutes left in the game.

Yeah.

So

I think the Lions, I don't know.

I'm feeling the Lions this weekend.

I like Aiden Hutchinson, but it seems like the Lions don't know how to use him correctly.

Yeah.

Because I read a stat the other day that said that

when he was standing up, when he was in a two-point, when he was at Michigan, his effectiveness was like...

He was twice as effective, basically, at getting to the quarterback.

This year, he's still twice as effective at getting to the quarterback when he's standing up, but they have him in a three-point stance like 95% of the time, Right.

Which is not good for him and not good for his strengths.

Get him standing up.

Get him standing up and just let him pin his ears back.

That's what you got to do.

Go get the quarterback.

Tell Aiden, like, pin your ears.

We're going to let you pin your ears back this weekend.

Heat up the quarterback.

Get the quarterback.

Dial something up.

Yeah, I agree.

All right, Hank, you're underdog.

Dubbears.

Yeah.

Hottest team in the NFL.

You're just doing this to fuck with me.

Nine and a half against the Cowboys.

I don't think Hank would do that.

All right, okay.

Hank calls him straight.

All right.

All right.

That's fine.

I don't feel very great about this game.

The Robert Quinn trade, short week.

I'll see if the Bears can put together two games in a row.

I mean, I was thinking about putting them in the Hungry Dog.

Again, I would never do that to fuck with you.

You put the Bucs in the can't lose to fuck with Steven.

But I.

I mean, they couldn't lose against the Panthers.

It was before I knew that Steve Wilkes was from Charlotte.

If I had known that, I wouldn't have put him in there.

I've told you my blind spot here.

I'm going to have to rethink that.

I thought you were going to be like, fuck yeah, let's ride.

Player season.

No, if you had asked me on Tuesday when I picked up Justin Fields' fifth-year option, I would have been like, yeah, they're going to win by 100.

Now that we're back to reality and I'm back to like, hey, this team might not be that good, but I just want to see Justin Fields do well.

We'll see.

The Justin Fields that played Monday night greater than Dak?

Agreed.

Why not again?

Why not again?

Okay, all right.

All right.

You know what?

I'm going to bet the Bears nine and a half.

Okay.

That's a lot of points.

It's a lot of points.

These guys are paid to play football, too.

That's where I went 0-4.

I'm just going back to the well, and it's just like biggest.

I guess I would have to take the Steelers in this.

Also, I'm going big.

Justin Fields

on turf, the Vikings game, and then the Monday night game against the Patriots.

Those are his two best games this year.

He's looked very, very fast.

Last I checked.

Dallas is in a dome on turf.

He's going to look fast again.

Okay, I'm in.

Max, your underdog.

You just talked about it.

Love the Lions.

Love the Lions at home.

Yeah, yeah.

Good pick.

Yeah.

Great pick.

Great pick, Max.

You know ball.

You do no ball.

All right, PFT.

I love this underdog so much, in fact, that I might be betting on him straight up.

Texans.

Ooh.

Plus two at home.

I think we're going to get

two and a half against the Titans.

This is a big game, by the way.

If it closes at two and a half, this will be the shortest spread that Davis Mills will ever have as a quarterback.

He's been wild.

This is his 18th start.

He's been an underdog all 18, all over three and a half points.

But we're getting closer.

Yeah, we're getting closer.

We're inching closer, baby.

And this might be Malik Willis because Tannehill had the walking boot on after the last game.

We don't know who it's going to be.

I thought it was two, so I came up with just, I was just going to say that, what is Lovey Smith famous for as a defensive guy?

Cover two.

Cover two.

Yeah.

We're going to cover two this weekend.

Yes.

Yeah.

It seems easy.

It seems like it was written in the stars.

Okay.

This is random, but Titans, Texans should always be a one o'clock game.

It looks weird at 4.0.

Yeah, it does.

That's a one o'clock game for like.

Commanders Colts looks weird at 4 at 400.

It's at 4.2.

Yeah,

it's a weird matchup.

Like, I can't remember the last time the football team or the Redskins played the Colts.

Yeah.

There's certain teams that you feel like play each other more than twice a year.

I would say the Titans, Texans is up there.

Yeah.

For sure.

I feel like they play each other like three or four times.

And then there's teams that just never play each other.

Like, I don't...

don't, the Dolphins have never played the Seahawks as far as I'm concerned.

No.

I would say even like the Panthers playing against the

Chiefs.

Yeah.

I don't think that's never.

That's literally never happened.

I don't know.

No, that's true.

That's a fact.

Okay.

My underdog, we already talked about it.

Steve Wilkes, I'm riding.

Plus four and a half.

I don't know.

That whole Charlotte thing really got me going.

Listening to the, reading those quotes from the guys being like, we're winning one for Steve Wilkes.

I'm in.

I'm in on the Panthers.

Bang that drum.

Okay, your underdog, Billy.

Going with the Jets, two and a half.

Have to.

So just, it's all or nothing.

Yeah.

I like putting it out.

I like this, Billy.

Balls on the table.

They're either getting fight clubbed or we're walking out of there.

I like Kerb.

Curb stomped.

Yes.

Yes.

Okay, Jake, your underdogs.

Going with a new game.

I'm going with the Giants plus three at the Seahawks.

Last week, we all went against the Giants because we thought it was a rat line.

We were wrong, so I'm not going to go against them again.

Obviously, cross-country road trip, but Giants are hot.

But we were right this week.

This is a rat line, too, though.

Yeah, we were right last week

about it being a rat line.

And we're saying it makes no sense.

So in a way,

we nailed it last week.

Here's what I would say to you, Jake.

If anyone pushes back, you'd be like, I just...

I'm going to keep betting the Giants till they don't cover the spread.

Right.

They're 6-1 against the spread.

They keep winning these games.

Also, for a little nugget, for anyone who's trying to maybe bet this game a different way, Seattle is six and one against the spread in the first half.

The Giants are six and one against the spread in the second half.

Interesting.

You can do a little double dip there.

I feel like Daybull is a very good in-game coach, and Pete Carroll, I don't think, is a very good in-game coach.

I think Pete Carroll has got a lot of strengths, but in terms of adjustments and being strategic with things like challenges, timeouts, stuff like that.

He's not even in my top 10 of coaches I would want.

Dables coached seven games.

Yeah, but he's been good.

Let's not get crazy here.

Can we be happy for him?

I am happy for him.

He's been really good.

I like, I mean,

I love him.

Great dude.

I'm just saying, like,

Pete Carroll's coached 100,000 games.

Dables coached seven, and you're talking about them like this.

Did you see the guy, though, that they brought onto the active roster, Candace, this week?

You know what?

I'm sorry.

I apologize.

I didn't see that.

Who was that?

Hank, did you see that?

Is that the guy Kanye listens to?

Yeah.

No.

Candace?

Candice?

You didn't see that?

Candace Owens?

It was a Candy's nuts.

Yeah.

I got that.

Oh, you got it?

Did you?

That's Brian Dable's favorite.

Yeah.

I do think that it's fair for us to say that Brian Dable, based on what we've seen, he's been great.

Yeah.

He has.

Now, Pete Carroll.

Hank, of all people, you should know Pete Carroll doesn't always make the right decision at the end of games.

Right?

Can I put that in terms you understand?

What are you talking about?

Sometime, are you doing, are you playing dumb again?

At the end of

the day, at the end of a Super Bowl, Pete Carroll decided to pass the ball instead of run the ball.

That's my entire point.

Like, Pete Carroll's a great coach at a lot of things, but I don't think that he's better than Brian Dable at in-game adjustments and at like crunch time decision-makings and strategy.

Yes.

I just don't so far.

I agree, and I apologize for

disputing your take.

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Okay, Overs.

Hank.

Overs got to come back eventually.

Yep.

Start with the Lover.

Yeah.

Oh, Hank.

How could you?

Oh, my God.

Jake got so trod.

I agree with Jake on this.

This is messed.

You know that we're all going to take the under in this game.

Not me.

The Lover?

Taking the Lover.

The Irish Lover?

39.5 Jaguars.

Broncos.

Wow.

The London Jaguars.

Wow.

This is going to be a gross game.

Gross game.

Okay.

I don't think so.

I think, I think.

You think Russell Wilson, this is the week he puts it all together?

It's going to be, yeah.

His hamstrings are very loose.

Yeah, that's fine.

And,

again, preseason, everyone loved the Broncos.

Two weeks ago, you guys were loving the Jaguars, saying they were one of the most fun teams, explosive teams, teams with a lot of potential.

I think it's going to be a shootout.

Have you ever said explosive?

Oh, yeah.

I don't know.

That's funny.

Hold on, our takes against us now.

I like this.

I like this.

Okay,

over, Max.

Just talked about Giant Seahawks over 44.5.

I think both these teams are good.

I think this is actually going to be a great game.

Over.

I like it.

I like it.

PFT?

My over is going to be Steelers-Eagles.

Oh.

Over 43.

I think the Birds are going to get 30.

Yeah.

And then I just need, I need two.

I just need two out of the Steelers.

I know that, like, a lot of people talk about Mike Tomlin as an underdog.

There's a reason why Mike Tomlin's been so good as an underdog is because in the past, it hasn't happened that often, and he had pretty good teams.

Right.

And so this isn't as good of a team that he's had.

So I'm not going to touch the Steelers, even though it's a big spread, but I do like over 43.

And here's a fun little story, a quirky little story about the Steelers and the Eagles.

Yeah.

Did you know that the Steelers and the Eagles were at one time the same team?

Yeah.

The Eagles.

They were the Steagles back in World War II.

So they were combined because the Eagles lost a lot of players to go overseas and fight in World War II.

The president at the time, FDR, said that he wanted Major League Baseball teams to stick together and give fans something to cheer about, but he didn't give that same directive to the NFL.

So the NFL lost a lot of players.

They combined forces.

They played like six out of eight games in Philadelphia.

They played two in Pittsburgh.

They went five, three, and one, I believe, on the season.

And that was the Philadelphia Eagles' very first winning season.

Wow.

Was when they were the Stegles.

So, shout out to Steagles.

I went on Pittsburgh radio this morning because we do it every other week, me and PFT, and our guys,

Randy and Bill Crawford,

they told me that Nick Siriani did his entire press conference talking about how he grew up a Pittsburgh fan, how he loved the Steelers, and they're worried that he's basically so not concerned with the Steelers that he spent the entire time talking about how much he loves them.

Interesting.

Yeah.

And also, a stat for everyone out there: undefeated teams off a bye week in the last 20 years are 14-2 against the spread.

That's pretty good.

That's pretty good.

So they've had a lot of time to think about it.

They've had a lot of time to think about it.

You know who the coach of the Eagles was then back in World War II, Max?

I did not.

The guy's name was Greasy Neal.

Nice.

Great name.

I like that.

Pretty good name.

Greasy Neal.

Yeah,

the coach of the Eagles should always just be called Greasy Neil.

Greasy Neil.

It's like how the grittiest player on LSU wears number 18.

Yeah.

It should just be Greasy Neal as the coach.

Greasy Neal.

I like that.

Okay, my over,

I'm kind of riding with Billy in a different way.

I'm taking over 39.5 in the Commanders' Colts because I think the ability for both Taylor Heineke and Sam Mellinger to do fuck shit both ways is high.

Awesome passes for touchdowns.

Also, maybe some awesome passes for pick sixes.

Yeah.

I think

there is a high volatility in this game.

It's a good game to double bet the defense/slash special teams touchdowns on both sides for it.

Yes.

Yes.

uh okay you're over billy i'm going bears cowboys 42 and a half oh low number at cowboys i actually like the bears offense watching them against the patriots thank you so in the cowboys i think da'x deck's back dak is back

last week well you were you were watching all the football so you must have missed it right

the whole game you got back but we'll see what happens dak didn't look that great last weekend no he had a little rust a little rust so I could forgive Billy for not

being wowed by Dak's.

No, what I mean is like, is Dak fully back?

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, he played a full game.

I hope so.

No, but he wasn't.

Is the rust off.

He wasn't fully back.

This week, I think, is going to be back.

He's fully back.

Yeah, fully back.

Fully back.

Okay.

Jake.

I'm with Billy.

I heard Dak's back, so I like the silver.

Okay, nice breaking news.

Dak is back.

First reported on pardon, my take.

Okay, unders.

Unders.

We talked about a PFT just did.

I am going under Philly Steelers.

Ew.

I agree basically with everything that PFT said.

I just don't think the Steelers are going to have any points in them.

Their offense is gross to watch.

The Steelers are good.

They have Robert Quinn now.

I think it's going to be a low-scoring blowout.

Okay.

Yeah, but I just need, just give me two touchdowns.

That's a lot.

That's all I need.

That's asking a lot.

Couldn't even get one against Buffalo.

I know, just give me one.

I really needed that.

Just give me one.

Yeah.

Give me one, and then let the birds get up to like 35 points.

35-7.

That feels good.

No, that wait, that's still the under.

That's under.

But then they go for two.

35-7.

35-8.

35-8, and that's a pretty.

35-8.

Just get me.

I'm betting on a push.

Get a push.

Okay, Max.

I think Dak is not back.

Under.

Ooh.

Good.

How dare you?

I love that Max just straight up does bet as a homer.

Yeah.

He's like, fuck the Cowboys.

Yeah, I think

I've gone negative towards the Giants or Cowboys every single time.

I love it.

her every single week.

I love it.

I can respect it.

Okay, you're under.

I'm taking the Lunder.

You're taking the Lunder.

You got to take the Lunder.

Jags, Broncos, going to be some wet, long grass over in England.

You got to take the under when the Jaguars are playing in London.

Okay, my under is going to be the Panthers, Falcons.

We've already talked about this game at length, but I think both teams are just going to want to run the ball.

And we've established that the Falcons will not pass more than 13 times a game.

So just give me run plays all day under 41.5.

Yeah.

Billy,

under

Dolphins Lions, 57.

51.

51.

I love it at 57.

I know.

I've misread my note.

51.

51.

Okay.

Just, that's high.

Those two teams.

It's a lot of points.

It's a lot of points to cover.

Okay.

And Jake, Lunder.

Londer.

Londer.

It's our last chance.

Yep.

Yeah.

0-2 on the year.

We have.

They're not playing at Tottenham this time.

It's Wembley.

Yeah.

So that's good for you.

That's the Tottenham.

Tottenham's the over stadium.

Wembley is not.

November 13th, we have Seahawks Bucks in Germany and Niners Cardinals the week after in Mexico.

So I'll be brainstorming

how to do that.

Mexico over.

Yeah.

The Mexicover sounds good.

That is fun.

I would take the under, they blitz a lot over there.

It's true.

Yeah.

We'll figure it out.

All right.

You figure it out.

All right.

Games we missed.

Cardinals, Vikings.

I think this might be the fraud alert time for the Vikings.

Fraud alert.

I think the Cardinals might win this game outright.

Yep.

And I think this might be the fraud alert time.

They're in the Hungry Dog parlay.

We should talk about Mount Rushmore, too.

Yeah, yeah, we will.

Yep.

I don't hate this because the Cardinals are actually good traveling east.

Yes.

They're the one team that's like, I think they're 13 and 4 when they go east.

It's funny because it's just a different way to...

I was reading that same stat.

It's just a different way to repackage it.

The Cardinals suck at home.

Yeah.

Because every stat is like the Cardinals suck at home.

And then you're like, yeah, when Kyler Murray is in the Eastern Standard Time or Central Time, he is like 15 and 4.

It's like, well, yeah, because he just sucks at home.

You could also repackage that as saying, like, when he plays on the East Coast servers,

like, they're maybe faster.

Yes.

Faster upload to it.

Do Call of Duty outreach.

Yeah.

Comes out tonight.

So today.

All right, so maybe not Fraud Alert for the Vikings this week.

Other game we missed, Raiders, Saints.

Should we put Josh Jacobs in the rushmore?

He's been awesome.

Yeah.

I was going to put him on mine.

Beautiful.

I have two picks.

One's a chalk pick, one's the Let's Get Nuts pick.

I'll let you guys decide which.

Okay.

Okay, so I think that's every game.

We hit every game.

Other than that.

Good for us.

Yeah, that was good for us.

Good, good, tight, tight preview there.

I just think it's bullshit that the coach of the Saints, Dennis Allen, came out and said, Jameis is healthy, but we're sticking with Andy.

Yeah, that is bullshit.

That's fucked up.

I also just, I'm so sick of the Saints shit.

I just am.

They should be good, and they're not.

I don't know if they should be good, though.

I feel like they should.

They don't have Sean Payton anymore.

Yeah, I was expecting their defense to be good, and it's just not.

Sean Payton would never, ever bench Jameis in favor of Andy Dalton.

That's a fact.

Sean Payton puts his nuts on the table.

That's a fact.

It's bullshit.

Okay, so we have Josh Jacobs in the rushmore.

Who else?

I'll go mine.

I'm going to just go back to the well, Kenneth Walker.

He's going to be offensive rookie of the year as long as he doesn't get hurt.

Kenneth Walker.

Billy wants to take Sam Ellinger and put like plus 3,000.

You're a moron.

No.

I'm not crashing and burning with you.

Well, they can pick whatever they want, but Jake, like, that's where it's like, you guys have to.

Yeah, yeah.

No, we're not doing that.

Okay.

Billy's on a kamikaze kamikaze mission.

He's like, hey, could you, like, do navigation for me?

No, I'm not getting in your plane, Billy.

All right, so

we have Josh Jacobs, Kenneth Walker.

You want me to do nuts or chalk?

Well, give it, give us the.

No,

I want you to.

Oh, God.

For nuts, he's probably going to do Josh Allen again.

No?

I want nuts.

Kyler Murray.

What?

It's kind of nuts.

Oh.

Damn.

What about when they didn't they play last year?

It's fraud alert.

We just talked about it.

They're going to fucking roll the Vikings.

Man.

It is Fraud City.

He needs like four scrambles.

All right.

So his rushing yards

this season, 30, 100, 42, 26, 8, 28, 29.

So he has not gotten it every game except one.

So he's due.

I don't know.

What was the nuts?

Saquon.

All right, you know what?

I asked for nuts, so we have to do nuts.

Kyler Murray.

I literally left it up to the game.

Yeah, no, no, no.

You're right.

You're right.

You're right.

All right.

So now you're picking.

We could just do Sam Ellenger because we're not going to win it.

No, don't pick it.

Don't bill it.

Come on, big cat.

All right, fine.

Well, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Don't do another one.

What would we get?

We'll go with Jonathan Taylor.

He's got a balance back.

All right.

Injuries.

All right, so Jonathan Taylor, Kenneth Walker, Josh Jacobs, Kyler Murray.

That should be some decent odds.

We've already, yeah, we've hit it two weeks in a row.

Yeah, let's get nuts.

You know, we're up some units.

We had some remote.

Should we add Josh Allen?

Fuck it.

All right.

that's our Mount Rushmore.

We have one at two weeks in a row.

Everyone go better in the Barstool Sportsbook.

Let's finish up the show with Fire Fest of the week.

Twin Peaks is the best in the game.

Here, your favorite drafts are poured at a frosty 29 degrees, and rare, barrel-aged whiskeys are served just the way you want them.

It's bigger game days and bolder fight nights.

I mean, where else can you find a scratch kitchen that always comes in clutch every day from lunch to late night?

Only at Twin Peaks, the number one sports bar.

Twin Peaks Scratch Kitchen scores every time.

Dig into hands-mashed burgers, chef-inspired flatbreads, and more at your local lodge.

All right, give us your fire fest.

All right, this is a real fire fest.

You can't get the lottery ball?

No.

I'm going to win five grand.

You know, I've had a few weeks where it's like, I don't have one.

I'm just make something up, a little short story.

This one's been rattling me.

I've had anxiety and just regrets about it all week.

We were at LSU last weekend fred's friday night i i got not just very drunk i got pretty much legless banged up banged up woke up on saturday

like

my knees were on the ground and i was face down or like lying on the chair Like I wasn't even on the bed.

I was fully clothed.

I just like, I just woke up, like,

like, not even ass up, just like knees on the ground, head on the chair for whatever reason, not bent over, just like.

It sounds like you're in a bent over position.

I looked like Leo in Wolf of Wall Street, like crawling to the car, basically.

Like, I was just like, kind of up.

My arms were just up.

My sink was on.

And I was like, holy fuck, that was...

And then I, you know,

your sink was on?

My sink was just running, yeah.

Okay.

I was like, what's going on?

And I was like, oh, you know, we were at Fred's.

I must have came home.

It was fine.

Whatever.

I was fucked up, but whatever.

Then I see, we go to the, we go back to Fred's where the college football show was.

I see this guy, Cam, who is, who's like with Raisin Cain's, like, we met and became friendly at Final Four, and he was like, oh, like, good seeing you last night.

And it was one of those moments where it all comes back to you.

Like, you see someone and you're like, oh, my God.

I was like, I didn't get back from Fred's and go to sleep.

I went into the casino and I saw he was with Drewski.

Who's like, I'm a huge fan of him.

I think he's the funniest dude in the world.

And I remember, I was like, holy fuck.

I was so fucked up.

And I went up to him.

And we obviously deal, you guys deal with like Stoolies and AWLs.

99% of the time they're fine.

And then there's the 1% of the time, like, they're just fucked up.

And you're like, they're talking to you.

And you can tell, like, this dude's not going to remember any of this conversation.

They're usually like kind of annoying because they're drunk and they don't realize how annoying they're being.

And I just had the moment of realization where like.

I was that guy.

Like, I went up to Druski and was just like, oh, dude, I fucking love you.

Like, you're so funny.

And just like, I don't even really remember what I was saying.

I just remember like I was super super fucked up talking to him and I probably was making an absolute fool of myself until like all week I've just been like you're such a fucking idiot

no I was with Megan Megan was there and she said that like that's that doesn't help someone came up to well yeah it was probably her fault but like uh

someone came up to Drew Skinner's like take a picture can we take a picture and I was like, yeah, I'll take it.

And then I was like cross-eyed and like couldn't even take the picture.

Like I was like too drunk to take the picture.

and mega's like i had to like take the phone and like take the picture so that is just like one of those

you know i've just i've just had it's been a fire

where it's just like you know all week i've just been like what did you say you should probably dm and be like yo man cool well then we saw no we saw him we saw him on the field and and like the there was a it'll probably be in stool scenes he was like saw him he's like oh you were fucked up last night and i was like yeah my bad and then in the camera this did not happen but it's gonna be in stool scenes people are gonna think it happened he was like yeah this dude puked at the table and i was like What?

And I was like, I didn't even play it on tables, but like, he was like, obviously, joking around.

But yeah, totally.

That's it.

That's out there.

Hank definitely.

I might have believed him.

Hank definitely didn't puke at the table.

I did believe him.

I did.

I did.

No, I just want to be crystal clear because it's going to be in stool scenes that you puked at the table.

You did not.

You did not.

I did not.

I didn't even get on the table because I didn't have.

No, you weren't even close to the table.

Two things we found out on this show.

Dak is back.

Hank did not puke on the table.

Thank you.

Thank you for clearing that up.

I did not thumb on my cat.

I did not.

But yeah, that's just one of those, like, it's just, you know, it's the worst.

Drunken regret.

The worst.

The worst.

Never meet your heroes when you're blackout drunk.

Yes.

I'm sure there's a lot of AW, like, you guys know exactly the type of person when they come up and you're just like,

it's not even annoying.

You're just like, this dude is not going to remember any of this conversation.

Right.

So let me just leave.

Yeah.

And that was me.

That's the worst feeling, too, is like the next day you see somebody and the first thing they say to you is, man, you were fucked up last night.

Because then you just, you, you try to replay back everything that happened.

Well, but there's all these gaps and you're like, you think the worst possible thing.

The worst was puking on the table.

Yeah, which he didn't do.

He didn't.

Dodged a bullet.

Was seeing Cam, like his, his, the guy he was with and I'm friendly with, and he was like, oh, good seeing you last night, man.

And then it was like the,

like everything started to flash back and you're like, oh my god, I did see him last night.

And he was with Druski.

Fuck.

And I was like, I was like, you got the table.

No, I didn't.

And I went to his his place and he had a tiger.

Yeah.

Mangled.

Puked on the table.

Mangled.

Did not puke on the table.

Didn't puke on the table.

Hold my own tooth out.

I keep getting confused.

You did not.

No.

Right.

I think my favorite part of that story, though, is Hank waking up ass up on a chair with the sink.

What the fuck?

Okay.

That's a good one, Hank.

That's a very good fire fest.

I can't even really hold a candle to that.

My fire fest is I got a pair of new shoes, and it's that thing where you think back at all the stuff that you wanted when you were a kid that your parents wouldn't get for you and then you get older and you get a job and you're like, you know what?

I can get all the stuff my parents said was too expensive back then.

So I got another pair of pennies today.

Actually yesterday I put them on for the first time.

Let me see.

Let me see.

Penn2s.

Oh, those are sick.

They're sick.

They're clean.

These are clean is what the kids are saying.

And I wore low-cut socks with them.

And

the back of my heel hurts so bad that I can only walk for like, I don't know, 30 feet at a time.

Then I have to stop.

I have to stop walking and then restart my walk after the blisters start to feel better.

Yeah.

Which is six shoes.

Six shoes.

Look good.

Totally worth it.

It's like when girls wear heels.

Sometimes you got to, you know, suffer for the fit.

Yeah, I should start to carry around like just a pair of flip-flops in a bag and take my shoes off.

Wedding season.

Yeah, once you get drunk, take your shoes off.

Yeah, oh, finally.

Oh my god.

You guys know what I'm talking about.

Yeah.

All right.

I've alluded to this, but my

son is now actually interested in basketball.

We play every night in his room.

Problem is, it is confirmed he's a lefty, and I don't know what to do.

What the fuck to do?

You got a witch.

I don't know how to teach him how, like, I know it should be easy to just flip it, but I cannot.

Like,

it makes no sense to me shooting lefty.

So I've been trying to show him, and it just isn't working.

Gotta give him a baseball.

Yeah, good point.

That's good.

He's not even basketball.

Call over Uncle Hank.

Oh, man.

Yeah, show him how to shoot Lefty because it's just.

I'm a lefty, too.

Are you?

Yeah.

But, like, I'm not afraid of it.

I hate lefty.

You guys are fucking.

Wait, you're not a lefty in golf, are you?

No.

No.

Ambidextrous.

Maybe I'll just keep pushing righty so he is ambidextrous.

But it's just

a brand.

He's all lefty.

He writes lefty.

He's a little spoon lefty.

And then when I was trying to teach him how to shoot, he was like, it wasn't computing for him.

It wasn't computing for me.

And then he did it with his left hand and it worked.

That's exactly what they did to Ben Simmons.

That's what his father did.

Now he can't shoot.

So just keep him lefty.

But he is in the NBA.

No, Ben Simmons is right-handed.

Right.

But he shoots left-handed.

But they switched it up on him.

Right, but he's in the NBA.

Right, but he can't.

So shoot.

Right, but he's in the NBA.

So here's all you do.

I would be fine with my son if he got to the NBA and couldn't shoot.

Here's all you do.

Just take this hoop away.

6'10?

Who knows?

Now he's like 2.5.

You got to take a half feet tall.

Take the hoop away and let him work on his handles and go the Ben Simmons route on that one.

Or I think Billy's right.

Like, give him a baseball because a lefty in baseball, you might have struck a gold mine.

Yeah, that's true.

Lefty in baseball are, you could try to, I don't know, like, what the laws are around parenting, so forgive me if this is out of bounds.

Just tie his hand behind his back.

No, that's a lap.

And just have him walk around just only using his right hand for like a full week.

I'll just put his right hand in a cast.

Yeah, just break it.

Like, you broke your hand.

No, I think they

did that in the 50s.

Yeah.

Like, you weren't allowed to be a lefty.

Tom Marinovich, right?

Didn't

that do all that shit?

Well, no, I think, like, in general, like, if you were a lefty, you would get, like, stoned to death.

Yeah, I remember being a witch.

I remember reading some book about a pastor breaking his son's left hand so he became a righty.

Whoa.

I don't remember what the book is.

I'm not going to do any of that.

I just can't.

My brain is too dumb to figure out how to teach something lefty when I'm not.

Just whatever you do, don't let him be a quarterback.

Yeah.

It just looks too weird.

It looks so weird.

Again, though.

That's exciting.

If he's too, like...

If he looks weird in the NFL, that'd be cool.

Creative.

Creative cat.

Yeah, fuck.

Creative kitten.

My brain is in a twister trying to figure out how to teach things lefty.

Billy.

So the basketball team that Hank and I are on is 2-0 now,

but we were tied up at the end of regulation.

We were supposed to run an ISO play, so I was out of the way, and then it got messed up.

I ended up getting the ball with time about to expire.

I had a chance to win the game, and I missed.

And I've been thinking about it.

We ended up winning in overtime, but I had the chance to just lock out.

How bad was the shot?

It was a mid-range jumper.

We almost went in.

Was it like,

was it

shooting.

Were you hogging it?

No,

I was.

No, it was like he was the third option.

Okay.

Wasn't expecting to get the ball.

So you can't get mad at yourself.

I know, but I could have done it.

I've been shooting well.

Also, we're in a league that's shooting.

He's saying, no, he has not been shooting well.

Whoa.

Anyway.

Use your words.

This is a podcast.

No, no, no positive vibes.

We're having an amazing season.

Yeah, but Hank gave you this look like.

I think he was going to be like, well, you also played like shit and can't shoot, which is true.

No, but anyway.

I don't think you've hit a jumper.

I haven't either.

I haven't either.

But once Hank gets hot, he's hot.

I've said it before.

Hank playing basketball, like, he will show up and he will literally miss the rim and hit the side of the, like, the side of the backboard, and then he'll hit like 10 in a row swish.

Anyway, we're transitioning from outdoor courts to indoor courts.

The shot hasn't really adapted yet.

I just need to show up 15 minutes early before the games.

It should be a season shooting position.

It actually should be zero.

We're playing on weak rims.

That's like saying all batting donut to not.

All-time funny funny moment with these refs.

The game ended or

Billy missed a shot and the rest go, all right, that's it.

There's no overtime in regulation or in regular season.

Everyone's like, what the fuck?

And then we

convinced the ref to

give us two minutes of overtime.

But the refs were like ready to just leave.

Yeah.

Like, all right, game's over.

Todd.

But we had an awesome game.

I mean, that was one of our toughest opponents.

We played a bunch of firefighters who had set plays and everything.

But now we also also have to learn, like, we had first time with refs, so we have to shoot free throws now.

So, like, we have to start practicing.

We paid some refs to make first responders stay longer so you could beat them.

Yes, okay, got it.

That's what happened.

Okay, but it was fun.

That does sound fun.

Uh, Jake, finish us off.

Uh, yeah, so my apartment's elevator broke.

Oh, no, only one elevator, and we're on the seventh of eighth floors.

So, for the whole weekend, was anyone in

the bottom when it happened?

Hank, no, I don't think anyone got stuck.

Okay,

but yeah, it was a a lot of stairs over the weekend, but

were you working with an Otis or a Tyson Krupp?

I have no clue.

Yeah, I'm an Otis man.

I'm an Otis man.

I've got a lot of experience dealing with broken elevators, and in New York, it's really a

come to Jesus moment of realization when your elevator breaks down and you get in touch with your building super, and you realize that he just has no motivation to fix it quickly, and he can tell you at any given time, well, tough shit, just take the stairs.

And then you're like, well, I guess I'm going to walk up now.

Yeah, that was tough.

That is tough.

I'm sorry.

Sorry for your loss.

Your calves are going to look good, though.

Yeah, we're good.

So Hank wants to get his first win with Edelman in the room,

but we should do our picks right now.

He can just do his later.

Do you want to pick?

No, he doesn't get to pick now.

I just want 17 to hit.

No.

Yeah.

All right.

So what's everyone else's?

I'm doing 87.

69.

Wait, are you picking now?

He's going 87.

Yeah, I'm going to go 77.

We're not doing this too.

We're not doing this.

If we're all picking, I'm.

You should let the guests pick tonight regardless.

Okay, yeah.

I'll let the guests pick tonight for the next one.

So they're going to act, we'll get two.

Yeah, we'll get two.

All right, 87.

You know what?

Fine.

I'll let you have two shots at it today.

Thanks.

All right.

17.

18.

32.

I think you said 89.

87.

Okay.

Watch PM TV for the history of the lottery ball.

20.

What's yours, Jake?

18.

78.

Oh, the reciprocal.

Oh,

Hank.

That's tough.

78.

If you read it backwards, if you read it in Hebrew, he got it.

Yeah, there you go, Hank.

That's got to count for something.

You had two shots and you didn't get it.

We haven't even taped Edelman yet, but I guarantee you won't get that one either.

Oh, man.

And the painting behind Hank Ford.

Oh, that's a new number.

New number.

Wow, the lottery ball machine is going to, in its quest, how many numbers we have left?

626 2729.

That's it.

Four numbers to beat Hank.

It's man versus machine.

It's like John Henry.

Oh, man.

78.

You were so close.

You were so close.

I'll see everyone on Monday.

Love you guys.

A bar-tailed Godwit flew from Alaska to Tasmania in 11 days.

That's a bird flying across the earth.

Go bird.

Those poles in 11 days.

Almost as fast as a Boeing 747.

Not exactly, but no, it's it's uh

it's just really

I'm the one to say I'd say it anyway

Today's a market defined

me

I watched an end, but be so let away.

Slowly learning life is okay.

drink of me.

I'll make

you

drink of me.