SCF Preview With Ryan Whitney, Warriors Take 3-2 Lead & Guys On Chicks With Arian Foster

SCF Preview With Ryan Whitney, Warriors Take 3-2 Lead & Guys On Chicks With Arian Foster

June 15, 2022 2h 4m Explicit

The Warriors take a 3-2 lead and we go around the room throwing takes at the wall until one sticks. Hank talks about how he’s feeling going into Thursday night and more. (00:02:19-00:34:35) Hot Seat Cool Throne including Brooks and Bryson and Zach Wilson looking crispy. (00:35:45-00:55:09) Ryan Whitney joins the show to talk about his international incident and previews the SCF final with some talking basketball as well. (00:56:41-01:33:08) We finish with a special guys on chicks with Arian Foster (01:34:06-02:00:58)


You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/pardon-my-take

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Full Transcript

Hey, Pardon My Take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music.
On today's Pardon My Take, we have our good friend Ryan Whitney on to talk about the Stanley Cup final, get you ready for the Lightning vs. the Avalanche.
Also talk about how he has created an international incident in Canada. We have our good friend Arian Foster on for Guys on Chicks, special Guys on Chicks.
And then we're going to talk game five of the NBA finals. A little hot seat, cool thrown.
A great Wednesday show for you. And we're brought to you.
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Today is Wednesday, June 15th. And Andrew Wiggins has arrived andrew wiggins possible nba finals mvp the maple jordan we can now bring that nickname back i never knew that was a nickname oh yeah when he was coming out it was the maple jordan because he's from canadian yeah yeah oh that's right it was it was him and um the guy that got drafted ahead him for the Cavaliers were the first two Canadians to ever go number one overall.

Anthony Bennett.

Anthony Bennett.

And they went back to back to the Cavs.

He was bad.

He was bad, Anthony Bennett.

He was very bad.

What's he up to?

I don't think playing.

He's probably playing in like Turkey somewhere.

Yeah.

I would imagine.

That would actually be okay.

Yeah, that would be great.

That would be a come up for Anthony Bennett.

But yes, Andrew Wiggins, game five.

The Golden State Warriors now have a 3-2 commanding lead. Is it commanding? Well, it's commanding right now.
Take command? I don't think it's. I think I want his future.
I'm happy for you. Oh, here we go.
What future? On the Warriors? Yeah, here we go. The reverse is coming.
So, Hank, would you say that it's a commanding lead right now or would you say it's a lead that was meant to be overcome? It's a lead that's meant to be overcome. It's a one-game lead.
They win one game. It's a one-game series.
It's a three-game series right now. And the Celtics – can I ask you a question, Hank, about that tweet, by the way, last night? When you're like, the Celtics just need to win three games in a row? Read the tweet.
Oh, no, I get that one. What did he say? He said the Celtics have to win three game sevens in a row.

He's talking about in the playoffs.

Ah, got it.

They've won three game sevens.

Got it.

I thought you meant three game sevens.

No, similar to the championship DVD, like the story of the Celtics winning three game

sevens in a row.

You would be Mr. Game 7.

Yeah.

It's going to be the greatest story in NBA history.

Has that ever been done before?

I doubt it.

So, how are you feeling overall, Hank?

I mean, we'll talk about the game.

We'll break down the game.

I'll see about the game. We'll break down the game.
But how are you feeling? Let's just get a status check on our boy Hank and what's going on in your head. Yeah, I mean, I went through a lot of emotions last night.
I definitely didn't sleep too well. I couldn't fall asleep.
Happy birthday, by the way. I was going through everything.
Yeah, it was a tough birthday present. I still think they're going to win the series.
I do think that the last 10 minutes of game four and five, there was just some infuriating plays. There was some terrible, terrible basketball.
They could have easily won both games, but they didn't. But I do think that it's very relatable of the Celtics to just put everything off until the end.
Yeah. Like, they should have won Milwaukee in less than seven.
They should have won Miami less than seven. They should have won this series in less than seven.
But they're just putting it off. They're procrastinating.
And then when their backs are against the wall, that's when they perform the best. And the Marcus Smart thing, it's like he did get fouled.
What's the Marcus Smart thing?

Clay Thompson pushed off on Marcus Smart.

No call, so you couldn't even challenge it.

Clay Thompson then hit a three.

Then about one minute later, who was it, Poole?

Maybe.

It was either Poole or someone else.

Oh, Gary Payton Jr.

I think it was.

The second, yeah.

He basically pulled Marcus Smart's arm in. It is a move that Marcus Smart has done, I'm not going to lie.
But he then flopped, and they called a foul on Marcus Smart. So it just blew my mind that basically people were saying Marcus Smart flopped on the Klay Thompson play, which if you looked, you know, letter of the law, he didn't.
Like Klay Thompson did extend his arm, and Marcus Smart fell down. He's the defensive player in the year.
He should get a little bit of liberty with that call, but they didn't call the flop there. Then one second later, they called a foul on a flop.
Question before we go any further. Are you blaming the refs? No, I'm just saying.
I'm just saying. What sucks about this is you had to ask it.
It sounds like this is your ref game. I'm not blaming the refs.
You can't use your blame the ref game on a game that's a double-digit victory. I'm not blaming the refs.
I'm just saying that was the momentum swinger. Also, the three at the end of the third quarter.
I'll go through this. This is from Tucker Boynton on Twitter.
Great follow for stats, Celtics stuff. Used to work at Barstool.
Used to work at Barstool. He's an intern, yeah.
41 seconds left within the third quarter. Celtics were up 74-72.
Wait, before you do this, just to be clear, you're not blaming the refs. Yeah.
If you let me finish, you would hear that that's not what I'm doing. You may get a technical foul, and then Marcus Smart got a technical foul, right? And no one even showed what the foul was for.
And then Draymond Green did not get a technical foul when he basically invaded the Celtics bench. And then all of the Warriors players also were on the Celtics side of the court.
Jason Tatum also took the ball to the huddle, which you're not allowed to do. Never take the ball to the huddle.
You never take another man's ball. Because if you actually watch that again, I mean, it was ridiculous.
Why was Draymond Green getting the ball back?

Well, he was in the middle of their huddle,

but it also was very funny that Jason Tatum refused to give up the ball.

Both of them were acting so funny.

Both of them were in the wrong at the same time. Because Jason Tatum, the timeout had been called,

and Jason Tatum was walking with the ball back to the bench on the baseline,

and Draymond Green was basically like,

I'm going to keep playing defense until you give up the ball.

What about the Gary Payton trip where he tripped himself,

and that was a foul too?

Yeah.

Grant Williams lightly touched him on the back.

I mean, that's what happens.

Listen, at the end of the day. Again, not blaming the refs.

I'm actually not.

Right.

Can I finish or no?

Yes.

41 seconds left.

Hank, you have the floor.

Ready?

Now.

Boston leads 74-72.

Celtics offense and possessions.

This has nothing to do with fouls, refs, none those plays but that was when all this happened okay quarter three 41 seconds left obviously they hit the three to go up one in the fourth quarter we should do a segment every podcast where Hank just reads things very fast Celtics missed a three they missed a layup they missed a three they missed a three they missed a layup travel offensive foul three. Then they were down eight minutes and 22 seconds left.
Boston trails 74-85. Did you just fucking listen to me? No, that's Boston.
They didn't execute. Missed three.
Missed layup. Missed three.
Missed three. Missed layup.
Travel. Offensive foul.
Missed three. No referees.
The Celtics didn't execute, and then they were down 11, and then the game was pretty much over. Okay okay so I have uh a couple thoughts on this game the first one is a big picture thought that this series has kind of confused me a little bit because like I've been saying I think the Celtics are the better team but Steph Curry's the best player and then Friday or Monday night happens and he plays terribly and Andrew Wiggins plays great Draymond played well I mean uh Clay is kind of back to Clay in a way.
He was 5 for 11 from 3. Is there a chance that neither of these teams are that great? No.
Okay. The NBA Finals.
But that doesn't – I mean, some years it's not – that's kind of where I'm coming from. Like, both of these teams – In terms of what? In terms of the Celtics cannot execute in a fourth quarter.
They just can't. Like, When the game's tight, they've had a lot of trouble scoring points in a fourth quarter in crunch time, whereas the Warriors are able to, whether you want to say it's veteran presence, the fact they've been there, they just don't panic and they're able to figure out a way to, in some of these big moments, get points the dirty way, whatever you want to say.
Yeah, I mean, they're the greatest basketball dynasty of the last 10 years. I also think this is not even close to the best Warriors team we've seen, and it's like I keep thinking that one team's going to assert themselves one way or the other, and it's like both these teams are very good.
I'm saying neither of these teams are great and kind of taking it. If you look at the Celtics' path to get here, like the Celtics beat the Heat they're a great team the Nets they beat the defending champion Bucks and they beat who many people were saying was going to cakewalk their way through the NBA finals the Brooklyn Nets so like I feel like the Celtics are a good team no they're they're both very good teams this might be just a stupid you know sports argument that I can't fully explain but what I'm basically saying is like neither team has had put together the full four quarters of great basketball and went and take taking a game last Monday night was like a muck it up kind of game where the Warriors looked like they were going to kill them then the Celtics came back and hit all those threes in the third quarter, and the Warriors execute down the stretch, and the Celtics don't.
And it's like, I don't know. They're both very, very good teams.
I think your point is maybe more to the fact that they're both really, really good defensive teams. That could be true.
So there's a lot of sloppy play that looks like it's sloppy, but it's like they're just really going as hard as they can on defense. That could absolutely be the truth, because I think the Warriors played great defense.
They just have to overcome that. Yeah, the Warriors played great defense on Monday night and there's also an alternate reality where you can look at it and be like, the Celtics just squandered an insane chance because you had Steph Curry for the first time since November 2018 not hit a three in a game.
First time ever in the playoffs he didn't hit a three. They went nine for 40 from three.
The Celtics missed 10 free throws and had 18 turnovers. That seems like a self-inflicted.
That's kind of what I'm talking about where it's like a great team doesn't have those self-inflicted wounds constantly. Well, you didn't take advantage of the Curry's off game.
That's a problem. You were probably only going to get one of these in the finals.
And it's funny because if you look at the history of Steph Curry and of his, you know, obviously he's a great three-point shooter, probably the best of all time. He has, I think, the top three longest streaks in NBA history.
It's crazy. Of games, consecutive games, making a three-pointer.
So it's like him one through three, I believe, and then it's Kyle Korver at number four. So Steph Curry's – and think about it, because in order to have the top three longest streaks, Steph Curry's career has basically been just like making a three every single game with like three instances where he hasn't.
Right. Over the course of like how long he's been in the league.
Right. So it's crazy that like in the one game where he doesn't make any threes, he has an off night by any stretch of the imagination.
That should have been the game that you steal one on the road. And it's also going to give red meat to Skip because Skip's already readying his argument that he's going to make down the line.
Steph Curry, if he wins his finals MVP, if the Warriors get another championship, then all of a sudden, now we're talking about Steph Curry in the top three, or some people will be. And then Skip's going to always be like, remember this game, though? This game, he didn't show up in the finals.
Which Steph still, even on his games when he looked off and he had no touch, he looked uncomfortable shooting threes, which is extremely rare for him. He still impacts the game so many ways because you have to have everyone on him and the lane opens up and he was able to drive a little bit and score.
My bigger point, Hank, I was thinking about more, right? Every championship team is not equal. Like, we always talk about teams like this team was one of the greatest championship teams.
I think this year, whoever wins this, I'm not going to walk away and be like, that team was one of the best championship teams I've ever seen. Do you know what I mean? No.
I think the Warriors – If the Celtics win. Okay.
Either way. No, I do love this.
Either the Celtics are winning, they're the greatest NBA team, or the Warriors cement themselves as the greatest NBA dynasty of all time. But it's by far the least talented of the Warriors dynasty teams.
Like, not even close. Hank, who would you say if you took the mid-90s Bulls and these Warriors?

Oh. by far the least talented of the Warriors dynasty teams.
Not even close. Hank, who would you say if you took the mid-90s Bulls and these Warriors? Oh, Warriors.
Steph Curry would cook them. That's a conversation that we're going to be having.
Which team was better? That's why I watch a game. I've watched this series and been like, I feel like both teams are very, very good, but neither team has been able to be like, we're great.
here's our great moment like we're even get even on monday night the celtas coming out in the third quarter and like stunning the warriors and you might be right it might just be they're both very good defensively because that is absolutely true i just i don't know i feel like you're trying to discount two teams in the nba i'm not i do banners will fly forever i love the move of putting a pre-asterx on it. Just in case Hank wins.
They're not playing. That's not what I'm trying to do.
I think that what you're saying applies when you are playing in Orlando in front of no fans. That's different.
That's a different – I don't know if your team should be counted the same way as other NBA championship teams. Not even really a basketball team.
But if you win, you know, you beat KD and Kyrie, you win a game seven, you win a game seven on the road, and then you beat the Warriors, or either way. Either way, it's two great teams.
Okay. And I also think, I mean, a few things.
I do think it's KD is probably, KD and LeBron have the biggest, biggest, like, to lose, the most to lose if the Warriors win. What about the team that loses? No, no, no.
Hank's right. Go off.
Again, I mean, how old is Jalen? No, LeBron. Jason Tatum's 14 years old.
You're right. Jason Tatum's young.
Jalen Brown is young. Yes, if they do lose, they squandered an opportunity to win an NBA championship, but they still made it to the finals.
They still have a great young core. And again, the Warriors are probably the best dynasty, the greatest basketball team possibly ever and definitely in the last 10 years.
I want to know. I want to know because I want to agree with you.
How does this negatively impact LeBron James' legacy? Because people say that the only reason the Warriors beat LeBron was because they had KD. Okay, but I'm still going to argue whoever loses the series lost the most.
No. Okay.
Actually, look how good Andrew Wiggins played last night in Kevin Durant's role. I agree with the KD take because if you notice— Like, was Kevin Durant as good as people say or was it Steph Curry? If the Warriors win this title without Kevin Durant and they've got Andrew Wiggins playing the role of Kevin Durant.
Really well. And also, if you've noticed, Kevin Durant has been extremely active on social media recently.
Like responding to all the haters that are talking about his game. Kevin Durant is thinking about this right now.
But that goes more to my point that the 2017 Warriors were one of the greatest teams of all time. That's not going to be said for this Warriors.
That's my point.

The Kevin Durant Warriors were one of the greatest NBA teams,

champions of all time.

Well, yeah.

That's my point.

That's kind of what I'm saying.

I don't think you're going to say that about this Warriors team

if they win the title.

It's going to be a dynasty, not taking anything away from them,

but ask any Warriors fan which team was better. It's the 2017 it's it's tricky because i think that this celtics team versus the 2017 warriors would put up a bigger fight what okay go on like the 2017 warriors okay i disagree on that they didn't even win 2017 warriors would beat either they would beat these warriors soundly and these celtics soundly disagree okay all right what about the Bulls though 2017 Warriors against who does Steve Kerr play for in that instance the Bulls no he does both coaches if you do 2017 Warriors versus these Warriors Steph's on both teams any team from the 90s that had to deal with the fucking pick and rolls and like the movement that the Warriors, they would die.
They would die. It's insane.
They would be killed on the court. Death by picks.
NBA players didn't run. They didn't do cardio in the 90s.
No, but you're joking, but the amount of screens and just constant movement they have is insane. They still ran pick and roll offenses back in the 1990s.
I don't know if you understand how recent the 1990s were, but it wasn't the Stone Age. They still had the forward pass in football.
The 2017 Warriors lost one playoff game. Okay.
I'm just saying. You're picking the greatest team of all time then.
I just said that.

That's why I'm saying the Kevin Durant thing.

I think Kevin Durant, people will obviously rag him because they will say, Andrew Wiggins, you put him in, and he's fine.

But I still would be like, but that doesn't make sense to me

because 2017 Warriors were all-time, all-time great,

whereas these Warriors are not.

What about these Warriors or these Celtics versus last year's Bucs?

I think the Bucs would probably win. Okay.
Yeah, I agree with that. I mean, that's kind of what I'm getting at, and I guess it might not make any sense.
It's a very trivial argument that really doesn't matter. You know what? No, I don't think so.
I think that these Bucs would have lost. Those Bucs would have lost to these Warriors.
Okay, well, either way, it might be a a stupid argument i was just a thought i had because i was thinking about this series and how i keep like in my head can't make sense of game to game and it just feels everything just feels weird because you'll have like it's almost like each quarter is its own separate game and like one team just goes crazy in a quarter and boom there's the game i don't know i just i've just – I've been trying to rationalize this series, and that's the take I came up with. It may be stupid.
It could be like completely asinine, and I'll – that's fine. I think I'll hand up that.
Here's the thing. If the Celtics had made 80% of their free throws last night, it's a completely different game.
It can be. That could be a blame the refs game if they had capitalized on their free throws.
Or had nine turnovers instead of 18. And that's been kind of their MO this year where they're Jekyll and Hyde with some of these things where it's like a fourth quarter comes around.
It's like, what are they doing? Why can't they generate offense? Jason Tatum did a nice Kobe tribute with the air balls. Like, those things happen.
Did he text Kobe? No, but remember when Kobe air balled in his first playoff series? Or maybe it was his first year in the playoffs. Tatum needs to call God.
He needs to get on the phone with Kobe before the next game. Also, Tatum didn't play bad.
And Jalen Brown's ball handles were, Tatum didn't play bad. Jalen Brown played horrible.
He can't dribble the ball. Tatum is not to blame.
He's got the dribble yips. Yes.
Tatum is not to blame for Monday night, I don't think. The one thing, I mean, I think you guys can relate to this I know you guys are you know procrastinators future me it's like professional procrastinators right they the Celtics again like Big Cat has jinxed been jinxing on this entire series they are the better team and if they had hit their free throws and didn't have turnovers they probably would have won that game handily and sometimes it takes that last minute like you put off like you're're like, I could easily write this paper.
And then you wait until an hour later. And it still comes out fine.
But you're rushing and you're a last minute. You've got to copy.
You've got to do the spark notes. So they can't do the spark notes when you're on the wood.
They're not leaving themselves any room for error. But if they don't make any errors, they can still win the series.
That's how I feel. They absolutely can still win the series.
I would not sit like – because it is truly a game six in Boston. I would think they would win that game.
And then game seven, all bets are off. Yeah, talking to Hank earlier this week, it seemed like you were more nervous about the possibility of going to a clinching game in Boston where they had the opportunity.
You seemed very nervous about your presence there, whether or not that was going to work because you built it up into like, Hey, they might get me on stage and ask me to make a speech. Like we might be hanging out with them.
I did build that up. Yeah.
You built that up in your head. Like, is it confetti? Is it almost like a, a relief to you knowing that you don't have to prepare a speech.
You don't have to worry about looking your best on camera and, and being a part of the team for those pictures.. Because, again, if they lose the Warriors, they lost to one of the best teams of all time.
And this run has been one of the most fun runs of my life. It's a great team.
Obviously, it would be a super, super disappointing end to the season. But, like, it's not – they've been an unbelievable team to watch and root for, and just being there, it would be sad, but at least you'd be able to pay your respects.
It's different than, I don't know. Can I ask you a question? Obviously, I'd rather them be up 3-2.
Is there any part of you that's exhausted watching this Celtics run? Because they are so Jekyll and Hyde. Yeah, it's been like this all season.
The first 50 games, it was infuriating where they were just blowing leads left and right, blowing leads left and right, and then they came together, were dominating. And then every game in the playoffs, that's what I was saying.
They gave away games to Milwaukee. They gave away games to the Heat.
They've given away games to the Warriors. They have made mistakes consistently, missed free throws consistently, consistently had turnovers, but they're still here, and they're still fighting, and they still chance to win so it's like it's i mean it's exhausting in a good way it's like it's that's the that's the beauty of sports so what do they have to do what do they have to do in uh game six is there anything that they do like any weird tradition before the game where they like have a local celebrity or somebody like a an athlete from a different team come out and like get the crowd pumped up no they usually do you know like people people that do charitable donations or someone that was in the service you gotta get belichick in the building that's really what you have to do there's one way out of this mess and that's bring the goat in can i give you a tip hank yep it's a make or miss league just gotta make your shots live by live by the jump shot the shots that.
It is so funny because you could actually like, you could say that and it just always is right. Because when the, when the, on Monday night, the Celtics played like shit in the first half, then they made all their shots in the third quarter.
You're like, there it is. Make or miss league.
I think, I actually think you just have to want it more. Yeah.
I think the Warriors wanted it more. I also am concerned that.
Game, Klay will show up? That, combined with our good friend, recurring guest, Richard Jefferson, the Celtics might just be gassed. Yeah.
They might get smoked. Andrew Wiggins, like what he has done in this series, and it's more the last two games.
I mean, I said it on Sunday's show. He went to rebounding school.
He's all over the place. It's crazy how much energy he plays with.
And I'll say this, Hank. The other key to the game is, I don't know how many minutes you can play him, but Robert Williams is by far the best player on the Celtics this series.
He's not even close. He was plus 11 last night.
No other Boston starter was better than minus 9. In a 10-point loss.
And he didn't even have bounce. And you can see it, too.
When he's on the court, the difference, like, the respect that the Warriors show him by not driving the lane and, like, attacking the rim versus when he's off the court and it's like, all right, free reign. They're afraid of him.
We can just go and dunk on people. The plus 11 was, like, not a fluke.
Like, one of those where he comes in, he played 30 minutes.

Yeah, right.

And then the other 12 minutes, they went down by, what, 28?

It's probably a little bit of a fluke the other way because the Celtics finished with a 7-0 run

to make it look like a closer game than it was.

Crazy series.

I don't know.

I guess I've been sitting and just trying to –

Who's the better team currently?

Warriors.

Warriors. They're up 3-2.
Here's why. I'll give you an honest answer.
I think the Celtics Are you happy with what you've done? Are you happy with yourself? Why are you mad at me? I'm not. I'm curious.
Hank's totally not mad. Don't put it in the paper that I got mad.
I'm giving you my honest take. I think the Celtics still, if they play their best game, are better as a team than the Warriors.
The problem is, if it's a close game late, the Warriors have so much more like, we can win this game late than the Celtics. I don't know what it was.
Again, it could be just experience. They've been there.
They've played together as a team for so long. They know how to get extra possessions, deflections.
Draymond was doing a great job in transition making passes. Something about a late game, like the Warriors are able to execute even when things aren't going their way versus the Celtics.
It doesn't feel like they have that killer instinct quite yet. You know what it is? The Warriors are a more talented team.
The Celtics can be a better team than them. It's like, I'll put it in terms Hank and the other New Englanders can understand, it's like when the Patriots played against the greatest show on turf.
That's kind of what's happening right now in the Super Bowl. What, if the Celtics...
Yeah. Rams.
Yeah, no, no. You follow me? Oh, all right.
For a second, I was like, wait, did I make that up? I don't know. I know what you're talking about.
I don't... The Patriots were, like, heavy underdogs in that.
Yeah, that's exactly what I'm saying, though. It's like the Celtics, when they when they're playing like at their best as a team or a better team but on the other hand the warriors have like a collection of like really super talented players that are better than the celtics players i see i kind of see what he's saying hank still no i i don't understand what you're saying at all i kind of see the patriots were underdogs that no one expected to win the celtics obviously people thought they were going to win the series i i mean yeah i mean it was basically a coin flip going in and again that's not i still i would not be shocked if the celtics win this series that's why i'm not saying i'm not sitting here being like the celtics are dead the warriors are like that's that's part of this series that has me in a in a mental pretzel because i've seen the celtics play at their peak and think that they are better than pretty much everyone and then I've seen the Warriors execute in fourth quarter situations where the Celtics have pissed down their legs and I'm like you better not have it be close because the Warriors will just figure out a way that's kind of where I've landed and it's got to be a little scary Hank knowing that Steph like he he most likely won't have a game like that again yeah because that's that was he looked so off right from the start too he missed his first free throw he missed a layup which like his touch was just off and so I don't know if it was like it was just truly like I love that we always do the is Steph injured whenever he has a bad game? I think he just was off.
Shooters have bad nights. So, and he still found a way to be productive.
Also, the Rams were only seven point favorites. So it's not like massive underdogs.
We've just broken the record for like dumbest sports. So you're saying that on the first 20 minutes of the show, I like it.
I like where we're at. This is what this show is.
Now I'm dug in. Would the 2001 Patriots beat the 2022 Warriors? 2001 Patriots? I'll tell you what.
I think the 2017 Warriors would win. They'd be favored by double digits over the 2001 Patriots because Tom Brady wasn't Tom Brady yet.
Just like Jason Tatum right now might not be Jason Tatum when we look back at his career 30 years from now. I think.
That's just so. I think.
That makes no sense. I know.
That makes perfect sense. He was first team all in the A.
I think the 2017 Warriors could beat a super team of the 2001 Patriots and Rams. What about the Bulls? Listen, obviously the game has changed.
Warriors in 2017 were insane. I feel like I'm taking crazy pills when I keep talking about the Warriors from that year.
Do we remember how good they were? That's why the KD thing, when everyone says, oh, Andrew Wiggins is doing what KD does, it's like sort of, but the Warriors have had moments where they've struggled. They were down like 50 to the Grizzlies.
It hasn't been easy for them throughout these playoffs. The 2014-17 Warriors, it was easy for them.
Also, the Rams were 14-point favorites. I messed that up, so there we go.
First half line. First half line.
I was talking about the first half. In the first half, these Celtics can hang with anybody, including Secretary.
Billy, put a bow on this entire, maybe the dumbest back and forth we've ever had as a show, which I actually thought was very entertaining because we've introduced new debates that have never been Who else right now? Quickly verify why you said Rams. I thought you didn't know what he was talking about.
Who else in the sports world is doing a comparison of the 2017 Warriors to the 2001 Rams? No one right now. I wanted to add 2017 Warriors versus 2007 Patriots.
Oh. No, that would be 2016 Warriors.
2016 Warriors. That's like straight up.
73 and 9. You know what? I think we drew inspiration from Chris Webber doing the Wes Welker.
Yeah, no, I think that's exactly what happened. Yeah, and so we've been Webberized.
By the way, they both wore 83 on the football field. Oh, shit.
There we go. Yeah, Draymond played tight end in a spring practice.
I think he was on the roster for a year, too, and they both wore 83, so that's pretty much all it is. Okay, are we how do you give us your prediction hank's just mad no no i'm actually trying to i'm actually hank was determined no i'm giving some thought i'm giving i'm actually giving some thought into whether or not the uh patriots undefeated season loss was worse than the warriors 73 9 season loss loss.
And I actually don't know.

I think the Patriots is probably worse.

Yeah.

You think so?

But the Warriors, they have the 3-1 thing.

True.

And the Patriots were never up huge in that Super Bowl.

And that Warriors team would be, I mean, it would be hard to argue.

Again, it's hard to be like 90s versus 2000 because the game has changed so much.

I still think that if you put Michael Jordan on the court, he's going to win no matter

what.

But that team would have been 73-9 and won a title.

and it would have been hard to argue against them. I don't know.
I'm going to say Celtics and seven or they get boat raced. That so I do.
I actually I agree with – I think there's a percentage chance that they are gassed

and there's nothing left in the tank,

and the reason they're not executing down the stretch

is because they just don't have, like, the stamina

or, like, the wherewithal to push through.

And obviously, they have two more games left.

That's a lot.

And if you get, like, a nuclear clay or Steph early in game six,

it could really take the air out of the building.

I could see that.

Yeah.

Okay, so you're saying either Celtics win or they lose.

I'm saying Celtics in seven.

So if they go seven, it's either Celtics in seven

or it's the Warriors in six.

I think it's Warriors in six or seven or Celtics in seven.

I think it's probably Warriors.

If the Warriors lose in the next game, I'm putting 50-50.

Yeah, I like that.

Yeah.

It's anyone's game seven.

Actually, you know what?

I'm going to go maybe more like minus 150 Warriors.

That sounds, yeah.

Game seven.

Because it is going to be at home.

Yeah.

You think Steph Curry playing in front of his parents

while they were both in the stands with their boyfriends and girlfriends had something to do with his off night? I don't know. Maybe.
Maybe, Billy. Now truly finish this argument.
Who gets the game ball, Billy? Of this debate. You can also give it to Del Curry.
Why does the 2012 Heat ever get mentioned? The 2012 Heat? That was the team that lost to the Thunder, no? Oh the team that beat the yeah matt no no they beat the thunder they lost the maps the year before spurs and lost to the spurs that was a very good team they lost to the maps and then the nba was like lebron needs to win a championship no that was a that was a very good team that was the team i think that won like 25 or 30 in a row in the regular season yeah i can't remember the exact number exact numbers. And I think like KG got hurt, so it wasn't even like a real.
They didn't really win the East. Yeah, that's actually a great question.
Was that the worst finals ever? Who'd they beat? The Spurs? Yeah, they beat the Thunder. Oh, yeah.
I mean, that's basically actually, honestly, and it's scary to say because the Thunder never made it back, but it's pretty similar to what's going on now. Just in the world in general? A great team of superstars playing versus a super young group of up-and-comers.
Oh, kind of like the Rams and the Patriots in the Super Bowl. Thank you, Hank.
No, but up-and-coming superstars. Up-and-coming superstars.
Who are the—name all the superstars on the Warriors right now. Steph Curry, Andrew Wiggins.
Okay. I would say most people wouldn't say Andrew Wiggins is a superstar.
He's been the second... He has played like a superstar in this series.
It's the birth of a star. A star is born.
He's the number one draft pick. Okay, you're right.
Actually, you got me there because I always agree with that. So you did checkmate me.
Because the number one, Anthony Bennett, to put a total bow on it, Anthony Bennett probably would be the best player in this series if he was out there. By the way, he's in the P League.
Oh. Taiwan.
Oh, okay. The P League.
That's very funny. That was probably the last letter that they had.
Like all the other letters had been taken for other developmental leagues. Yeah.
The motto of the league is something interesting, really interesting. Oh, I like the P-League.
That's like Taiwanese Jake instead of wild. Yeah.
Something interesting. Really interesting.
Okay, let's do Hot Seat Cool Throne. Brought to you by our friends at Coors Light.
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Okay.

Hank, hot seat, cool throne.

I would quickly, really quickly.

We're going to go back to this?

Four words or less.

Official prediction.

I said mine.

I said Warriors in six or seven.

No, I said four words or less.

Okay.

Celts or maybe Warriors.

You're the worst.

Dubs or Celts? Scaredred Scared to make a take Never thought I'd see the day Okay Alright fine Fuck it Celtics Hank Celtics It's a three game Six or seven I'll stick with what I said To start the series I think Warriors in seven I think Celtics in seven That's what I said to start two Alright What's your prediction? Celtics in six. They win by so many points on aggregate.
You're over here demanding takes from us. I think Celtics in six is his prediction.
Wait, you have to predict it now. That would be crazy if they did it on aggregate.
Like I said, I couldn't sleep. I was up in bed.
Dante posted a blog about aliens in Chicago, and I legitimately had the thought of what happens if an alien attack happens and they have to stop the finals. Would the Warriors try and claim a title up 3-2? We don't have to keep going.
But I was running through the motions. I was like, literally, maybe an alien invasion will happen, and they'll stop the series.
I swear to God we're not high, but this has been one of the funnest part of my dates ever. Just by the bouncing off the walls we've done on all these dates.
It'd be an all-time woge bomb when he tweeted out, the game tonight has been postponed, parentheses, aliens. And Wendy, we can get into Wendy later.
Wendy would be the first one. Did you see what he said last night? Wendy would get hauled onto the UFO, and they'd be cutting his spleen open in five minutes.
Wendy had an all-time. We don't have to get into it.
This show has just been everyone throwing a take at the wall and seeing him in sticks. He, he, he.
Bond stars in 2017. His take was basically, not only do you have to beat the Warriors on the court, you have to beat them because they pay so much money to their players.
Oh, yeah. They are, like, they have spent a lot of money.
Yeah. Yeah.
Isn't that what salaries are? Right. Right.
I'm confused. I was, like, thinking about it.
I was, like, joking around. Like, yeah, he's making some good points, but it's also such a ridiculous take that you can't even.
Like, they're kind of cheating. Yeah.
By paying their players. I mean, knowing some of the owners in the end.
Jerry Reinsdorf definitely would be like, that's cheating. They have a $340 million payroll.
You don't have to beat the Warriors in the court. You got to beat their checkbook.
This was a checkbook win for the Warriors. Oh, shit.
Asterix. His probably argument is like they're not all owners are created equal, and some of these guys are like the Warriors owners are insanely, insanely.
They're not even Balmer. could if next year they win win horse's brain will explode if the Clippers win here's here's the real question not to go back to the 2017 Warriors but let's do it could the 2017 Warriors win an NBA championship if they had to start Chris Paul in every game no because everyone would hate each other by the end of the series.
Hey, what's your hot seat? My hot seat is Kim Kardashian. Did you guys see this? I mean, she should be in jail.
What happened? So she took a Marilyn Monroe dress from a museum and got it re-tailored for the Met Gala or some shit. What? And destroyed it.
What? How did it get destroyed? I don't even really know. They posted before and after pictures and I've never seen people more.
I was like trying to figure out what they even did. So I'll send you the, I'll send you the pictures.
I don't know what they did. I think they just retailored it, but people, I've never seen people more upset basically saying they destroyed history.
And like, there's not, I don't know why people care so much about marilyn monroe anyway i think i said marilyn manson in the beginning but she was like the universally the hottest goals yeah um it's back in the day when there was only one true hottest right but people are really mad being like oh there's not even that much like this should have been in a museum and people like it wasn't a museum like kim kardashian like took it took it out of the museum i kind of like i remember when the met galley happened there was one person whose job and like this blew my mind there was a person getting mad on twitter because uh their job was to be a caretaker of historical dresses and museums not even of this dress but that's like their job at a different museum right and they saw that kim kardashian was wearing this dress and they flipped out because they're like you know all the care that goes into it And I saw that I was like this is the most Twitter thing ever Having like one person get super upset About their niche job And it turns out that person was like 100% correct I guess Because Kim Kardashian's ass destroyed Marilyn Monroe's iconic dress I'm down with this move just because it's a very funny Like evil. Everyone talks about Bezos and Elon Musk and robots and stuff, and the true evil billionaire is Kim Kardashian's ass just breaking dresses.
Yeah, I mean, what's the point of being a billionaire if you can't take historical artifacts and break them with your ass? Yeah, facts. Facts.
Agreed. My cool throne is I have a couple of Little Caesars.

Okay.

Yeah.

They are the new official sponsor of the NFL.

Hell, yes.

People are roasting them online.

Why?

With that announcement because Little Caesars is trash.

What?

It is trash.

That's elitist of you.

It's trash pizza.

You and Jake should go out to dinners together because...

I love Pizza Hut, by the way. Pizza Hut...
No, Pizza Hut is no pizza is very good fantastic pizza was my birthday dinner every year as a kid pizza buffet what can i get for birthday dinner you can have anything i want pizza great great fucking food so i'm not an elitist people forget scissors are just trash it's like not pizza little caesar's hot and ready pizza for five dollars like you are you're forgetting where you came from if you never were broke and had to eat little caesar's hot and readies five nights a week it's actually it's not whoa whoa whoa pizza pizza yeah you had little caesar's five nights a week yeah that's a lot yeah no i i literally used to go to little caesar's every single day for my dinner i would have little caesar's five nights a week because it was affordable and it's pizza and it's fucking melted cheese on bread with tomato sauce. I can choke that down five nights a week, no problem.
My move was just to buy a bag of 20 pounds of frozen chicken from Sam's Club and just eat that every night. That's also a value conscious decision.
It was like 20 pounds for like $19.99. It was not good chicken.
That's way healthier than eating Little Caesars five nights a week. I'm actually shocked, though, that Little Caesars was able to afford to become the official sponsor of the NFL.
Good for them. It seemed like that would be a little outside their cap range.
They out-pizzed the Hut. Yeah.
They did, Billy. True.
They did. And then my other cool throw-in was just Meek Mill.
I about it uh when they did the flip underneath the

sixers thing and just how like hilarious of a character he is but he posted a workout video i just i just sent it to the group where he is yes uh shoulder pressing a barbell with one hand and it's like philly please please break it down break it down as a fitness guy for the listeners he's got what looks like actually to be a light bar, not a 45-pound bar. And he has what looks like maybe 5 or 10-pound bumpers.
I think they're 5 pounds, yeah. And he's just going one arm.
I saw someone tweet it and be like, how is it that Meek Mill does everything incorrectly? Yeah, it's just a hilarious, hilarious video. Hilarious, hilarious dude.
So shout out to Meek Mill. Okay, shout out to Meek Mill.
PFT, your hot seat, cool throw up. My hot seat is Jake for missing this stat.
I didn't see Jake put the stat out here. It's wild.
Oh, yeah, Vlad? Yeah. All right, I knew it, but I didn't say it.
All right, say it.

You kept it to yourself.

So Vlad.

Please don't keep wild stats to yourself. Yeah, that sounds like a lie.
Yeah, you actually turned into Billy for a second there. Yeah.
Like, I already saw it. I was going to say it, but I didn't.
No, I didn't say I was going to say it. I just saw it.
I saw it. You kept it for yourself, which I'm telling you right now, do not keep any wild stats to yourself.
I will stop. Okay.
Going forward. So, Vladimir Guerrero Jr.
has 87 home runs and an OBP 363 in his first 403 MLB career games. Any guesses what Vladimir Guerrero Sr.
had in his first 403 MLB games? The exact same. 87 home runs and a 363 OBP.
Damn. Wait, there's another wild one that you missed as well.
Whoa. Give it to us.

Jake.

Hold on.

Are you slipping on wild stats?

I'll fold it up.

This is super wild.

All right.

That was really the only one that I had for –

I just thought that it was despicable that Jake missed it.

Are you aware of the MLB's all-time home run leaders list?

Go on.

Number 122, Cecil Fielder, 319.

Who?

Cecil.

Cecil.

Tied for number 122.

Prince Fielder.

R.P. the lion.

319.

See you soon. Go on.
Number 122, Cecil Fielder, 319. Who? Cecil.
Cecil. Tied for number 122, Prince Fielder.
R.P. the Lion.
319. Oh, okay.
That's wild. Did you say that's wild? That is wild.
That's wild. That's wild.
Confirmed wild. Okay.
That is a wild stat. And then my cool throw is chaos in the Washington football team or the commanders, whatever they're calling themselves this week.
It's been a wild week. And today, it was an all-time press conference moment.
They were talking about Ron Rivera and the $100,000 fine that he levied against Jack Del Rio. And Pete Haley from NBC said, Ron Rivera has read the First Amendment quote over and over in light of Jack Del Rio's remarks last week and has a copy of it on his desk, he said.
Wants to make it clear he takes it very seriously. Ron Rivera has a copy.
I just want to repeat that. Ron Rivera has a copy of the First Amendment that he keeps on his desk that he reads over and over again all the time.
And there's no other team that I think could get into this kind of controversy first amendment off a first amendment controversy before before minicamp even starts besides the washington commanders but i i've realized going through all this that like i secretly love the chaos that goes along with rooting with this team can you imagine rooting for a stable franchise how fucking boring that must be i can't either i yeah exactly that's what I'm saying. Rooting for these dumpster fires of organizations, it provides a lot of content and a lot of, I don't know, just excitement in my life.
I feel alive whenever I'm reading a Washington Commander's headline because I don't know if it's going to be about our wide receiver holding out that we won't pay or if it's going to be about Dan Snyder getting called before Congress again. Actually, Dan Snyder probably has a copy of the Fifth Amendment on his desk, and Ron Rivera has the first.
We've got 20% of the Bill of Rights covered. Yeah, you've got it all there in the nation's capital.
It's very appropriate. Yeah.
All right, my hot seat is Nike. I don't know if you guys saw this Twitter thread that was out there.
It was a few days ago, but a guy named Trung Fan, I think he's a business reporter. And he did a story about how Nike could have signed Steph Curry back in 2012, I believe.
And they showed up to the meeting. They didn't bring executive they brought like a middle manager guy they mispronounced steph's name wrong and then they did a presentation and on the presentation it was watermarked kevin durant and that's why steph ended up with under armor oh wow yeah like all-time bungling of of a generational superstar you have to imagine that they probably would have won the championship in 2017 or 2016 if he was wearing Nikes instead of the chefs.
Yeah, but could you imagine if you're thinking back to that, you could have had the guy for relatively cheap considering how good he is. I think Under Armour was like $4 million or something.
How many people do you think got fired for that mistake a lot a lot had i mean i don't it's just a crazy crazy story that they would do that to a guy like steph curry obviously he wasn't steph curry then but um also hot seat anyone who hasn't bought our july 4th merch which is out now go to the barstool sports store it is sick um we got all new merch for 4th of july my cool throne is brooks Brooks and Bryson. So Brooks had a comment at the U.S.
Open that was basically like, stop asking questions about the Live Golf Tour. You're basically taking away from our U.S.
Open and the PGA Tour. He's right.
I'm happy that someone spoke up about that because he's essentially like, we're just giving them press when every press conference everyone does is a question about live golf and not the u.s open which is taking place this weekend they're also asking him basically to talk shit about his brother yeah so if you ask brooks that question the if brooks answers in any way any form the way that you want him to answer by asking that question he's basically saying like i hate my brother yeah right and then uh bryson as much as we don't like him he was the first answer that i saw that was like okay he basically was like yeah it was financial and uh i also don't have to play as much golf i can like have more of a life i mean it was like hey someone finally answered why they're doing the live golf instead of being like you know mumbles of words of words and these weird like reasonings. He's just like, yeah, it was financial for money.
It was for money. Which is what I'm like, appreciate his honesty.
Yeah. Except maybe not total honesty because he's like, you know, I'm excited to spend all this extra time with all my friends.
Yeah. It's like, wait, you don't have to back up for a second.
Yeah. Rory is like really, really riding hard for PGA Yeah It's kind of cringe Which I like it No I like it I don't think It's cringe He was like oh yeah Like I won the fucking Canadian Open last week That means something It's like does it Is that cringe I'm gonna say no Right Yeah The majors mean something But I kind of like It's the 8th major I do like the rivalry though Yeah No it's a very WWE you know Yeah but like if the live tour goes on 10 major.
I do like the rivalry, though. Yeah.
No, it's a very WWE, you know. Yeah, but, like, if the Live Tour goes on ten more years, it could mean something.
Like, everything doesn't mean anything its first year. Yeah.
They're building something. The course looks awesome.
You fuck with the vision? Let's build? No, I just think, you know, what is it? Roy's a bootlicker. Wait, what would that make the guys that are bootlicking the live tour? Yeah, those might be the bootlickers.
They're just paid assassins. I like the spin zone.
You should be working with Greg Norman. Hit me up.
The bottom line is if you have a boss, to a certain extent, you are a bootlicker. You're going to have to lick a boot at some point um not me yeah that's true we have to lick your boots uh all right billy hot seat cool drum uh we may have brushed over this earlier but my hot seat's jason tatum another cool stat he has bypassed uh lebron james is having the most turnovers by a player in a single postseason he has 95 so not the mvp type performance we've been expecting a lot of turnovers by a player in a single postseason.
He has 95. So not the MVP-type performance we've been expecting.
A lot of turnovers. If I had to vote right now, I'd vote Steph as the Warriors, and I'd vote Robert Williams.
Maybe his stats aren't there, but if you watch this series, Robert Williams is the most impactful Celtic. Yeah, I just don't think there's any shot that if the Celtics do win, then it's not Tatum.
Yeah, I agree. I've changed my mind, though.
I think the funniest possible outcome is if the Warriors win and Jason Tatum goes off in the next two games for like 50 points each, and then Jason Tatum gets the MVP in a losing effort. Now, that would be the funniest outcome for Billy.
Yeah, that would. I think Jalen Brown's playing much better.
He can't dribble.

Excuse me. You can't dribble.

You didn't watch the game.

Yeah, you don't know ball.

I think he's putting it to the same.

Billy, you don't know ball.

I did watch the game yesterday.

Do you want me a favor, Billy?

Billy, you don't know ball.

I don't.

I'm fucked with you.

That's what people love to say.

You're casual.

Yeah, they're like, you don't know ball, bro.

My other hot seat is Sharknado.

Move over Sharknado. We now have a Sharkcano, which is a bunch of sharks in a volcano.
Oh, yeah, yeah. I saw that.
It sounds like an awesome novelty drink. Right.
But you guys remember Sharknado, a little sci-fi movie, Summer of Sharknado. It was pretty cool back in the day.
Well, now there is real-life sharks who have adapted to living inside of a volcano in the middle of the ocean. How is that possible? I call bullshit.
Isn't it magma? They have adapted to swimming in the extra hot waters and the different acidity they've adapted to. I call bullshit.
Some have said that their skin has become heat resistant and they're able to thrive in these hot tattoos. This is one of those stories that science just releases so that everyone gets interested in science.
Yeah, yeah. I call bullshit.
It's like how every two weeks there's an article that comes out, oh, we think we found life on Mars. Yeah, right.
Like, you're just trying to get us interested in science. Not going to work., NASA is just ready.
NBA finals are on. When the shark Kano explodes and a bunch of sharks from that are volcanic, like, land everywhere like in Sharknado, you'll be like, whoa, shark Kano.
I'll step on them because they're not gonna be in water. Yep.
Cool throne. Zach Wilson's been having great training camp

He went 8-9 in 11-on-11 drills

Nice

Some are saying that he's looking

Extra crispy in camp

Extra crispy Zach Wilson

It's getting pretty serious

So what's your projected stat line for Zach Wilson

Week 1 next year

The exact same one I said before

I think it was like 250 yards

Three touchdowns, one interception

And I think he passed over 50%. Also, all right.
Other cool throne zoos. There was a dog that was a stray dog ran into a gorilla enclosure and they didn't shoot the gorilla.
So that was of the best hyper-specific Hot Seat Cool Thrones.

It was like your Tatum bet for veganism, science fact, Jets quarterback, gorillas.

Wait, it's not over.

That was Bingo.

That was Billy Bingo.

But I also think that if you go back and you look at all four of our Hot seat Cool Thrones so far, our listeners should be able to get 100% right assigning who picked which one. Yeah.
If it was like a blind test. Yeah, but that was...
Maybe we should put out that graphic. Yeah, okay.
What's your last one? Last one, there was a new border drawn between North America and Europe. There was an island that Canada and Denmark have been sort of having a proxy war over, but it's more like a funny, like they put Canadian whiskey and then they'll put some Danish drink.
It's like a mayor's bet. Yeah.
But they decide just to split the island and now there's a new border between North America and Europe, which is weird because they're across the sea from each other. That is weird.
Okay. Nice.
Good job, Billy. I enjoyed that hot seat.
Cool thrown very much. My hot seat is fake Clay Thompson.
Oh, yes. He has been banned for life from the Chase Center.
He walked through five layers of security and put up shots on the court for 10 minutes. Yeah.
On Monday night. He must be a pretty good shooter, right, to be out there for 10 minutes and not get caught.
It's a long time. It was early.
I think it was very, like, way before any players were out there. And he tweeted, he was like, do I regret, like, giving up $10,000 tickets? Because he didn't get to go to the game.
He's like, no, I was an NBA player for 10 minutes. That's pretty cool.
Yeah. Yeah.
So that's tough. My cool throwing is Joey Votto.
A little girl made a sign. Will you make a TikTok with me? And he did on the field.
I saw that. Pretty cool.
That was beautiful. Yeah.
That was beautiful. Good for Joey Votto.
Yeah. Okay, good job, boys.
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Okay, here he is, Ryan Whitney.

Okay, we now welcome on our very good friend, Ryan Whitney. He was supposed to be our guest a couple weeks ago when he got held hostage by the country of Canada.
That's why we ended up with a drunk biz. It was.
He was hammered. He actually said.
Oh, he he was loaded i don't know if you listen to any of it but he basically did like 15 minutes of shout outs to the tnt crew like everyone he made he made your show just his like thank you please to tnt to keep hiring him part of my take is the credits to spit and chiclets yes it was it was incredible but we were happy he filled in uh because you were being held hostage so can you tell everyone the whole story that might maybe doesn't know it because you i saw today it was retweeted on my timeline there are now canadian politicians who are mentioning you by name who are like listen to wit this guy gave an impassioned speech in whatever congress or senate is in Canada, Parliament, I don't know. The Moose Lodge.
Yeah, you're becoming like you've ignited an international incident. And I think you're making change.
Like you've created change, right? Oh, yeah, there's been change. Little did we know it would take an American, a scrub former hockey player American to lose his mind at Pearson International Airport, the worst airport on earth, to end up causing the Canadian Parliament to end up finally making some decisions that will help out their citizens.
I mean, we had this guy today, Michael Barrett. He's my new best friend, I think.
He's saying, will the prime minister listen to it? That's the guy. That's the guy.
I'm wondering, side note on that, he said Ryan Whitney spitting chiclets fame. Does that hurt a little bit? No, that actually feels amazing.
Okay, because I was going to say, you played in the league for a long time. You're having a better at this.
Yeah, but you also have a liquor, like if he'd said Pink Whitney fame, that would have been pretty been. Oh, that would have been a little cooler because we probably would have sold a couple more bottles based on that.
Yeah, that's true. But so you got you just got locked like you got locked in the in the entire country of Canada for 48 hours.
Yeah. Long story short, got into Canada, waited about three hours from the worst, like somewhat.
I actually can't even say it's like a normal scenario getting through U.S. customs in Canada, but they have the worst setup ever, waited three hours, finally got through, waited another three hours.
They closed the line that we're in, went to another line. They ended up closing that line.
So then had to get in the line to get back into Canada to then stay in a hotel for about two hours till I had to report to my flight the next morning in which I finally got about two three hours of sleep got back to the airport I was told that in those three hours they had switched my flight to another flight to Montreal instead of to Boston and it was so close that I couldn't make it so at that point the the like the the mind was but big cat if DFT you could have I was having a legitimate meltdown as they told me. I was thinking, I was like, I'm not getting home.
I am Tom Hanks from the terminal. And so I talked about on Chicklips, it took me about 30 minutes to describe what just happened and I just did it in three seconds for you guys.
Maybe that means I shouldn't have spent 30 minutes last Chicklips describing it. I went into such detail that, yeah, all of a sudden, like, the thing went so crazy viral that all these politicians in Canada were like, this is a joke.
And then people say, like, this is classic. People say, like, oh, like, quit your whining, baby.
You're a fucking baby. Everyone deals with this.
It's like, yeah, sorry, bitch. I have a following.
Like, what am I going to do? Like, sorry, people are listening to me just because, yeah, I know regular everyone's the same when they're stuck in an airport. But if you have a big following and you could get out and maybe show some people what's actually going on in certain airports, yeah, I'm going to do it.
So I did. And now all of a sudden, I think Canada is going to be renamed after me.
Yeah. Or at least they're going to pass a law name, like Whitney's Law.
Sounds like if you played in the league, you shouldn't have to go through customs. It's like somebody was writing like Whitford Prime Minister, joking around.
There's so many responses. He's not even from Canada.
Like, thanks, Tim. I mean, it was the whole thing.
I felt bad for you because it really was like our little piece of it was that we were supposed to have you on pmt that night and you're like i landed 330 remember that yeah we talked yeah yeah you're like i have a five hour layover i'm gonna go through customs then i'll i'll zoom in while i'm sitting for my flight and next thing you know like two days pass and it's like wait he's still in canada what i have a beard and i'm in and i'm in terminal one and at toronto pearson airport right now and then like what else what else was i just gonna say happened that involved um oh yeah and like in terms of like us trying to do the show i kept being like i got i got two more hours to do pardon my take i was like i'm never getting on biz it seems to be like sour grapes because it seems like we have their cup and now they kidnap one of our podcasters. Exactly.
Yeah. And I really thought I was never leaving.
So, oh, this is what I was thinking. So I left Edmonton at about 10 or not.
I left the hotel at 9 a.m. R.A.
left the hotel at 11 p.m. for like a 12.45 p.m.
flight red eye and got home before me. Oh, no.
RA is the one that they let breeze through customs. Yeah.
This guy's probably carrying all the drugs. Yeah.
Yeah. I will give you credit.
Like, you were, till the last second, you're like, I can still do it. I can still do it.
And then finally, you're like, I think I'm screwed. And then, flash forward, you're still there.
And I'm like, you don't want me on in this state. I mean, although I do say I think I kept a pretty level head.
Like that video I put, I mean, realistically, like if you told me what happened and I and then you said you're going to make a video after this happens, I would have thought I'd be like screaming and scratching myself. And I was pretty much just all right.
I'm in hell right now. Do you know what they need to do now that I'm thinking about it because i had i had nothing close to what you had uh on sunday getting back from san francisco but it was you know delays and bullshit getting jerked around they should really have one of those uh break rooms where you can go in and you can just smash shit because like that would be incredible like if you're delayed enough you can pay like 20 and fuck the united club fuck Fuck the Delta club.
I don't want like that stupid mix. They give you and like one free diet Coke.
I want to go in and I want to smash a TV. I want to, I want to punch something.
I want to smash something. And then I'll come out and I'll be like, all right, I'm fine.
I'll sit here and deal with the delay. I want to office space a printer while I wait for my delay.
Cause you have that feeling of hopelessness where you're like, nothing will change. And you just want to punch something.
You know what they should give you? They should give you one of the planes that they're taking out of commission and let you go beat the fuck out of an airplane. Yeah.
Let you rip an oxygen mass out of the top. Yeah.
Just go fucking bananas. I also love the people.
I know you guys deal with. I was like, this is hell on earth, blah, blah, blah.
And it's like, you've been to Ukraine? Yeah. Okay.
Here we go. It's always going to happen.
I haven't been to Ukraine. No shit.
Ukraine's worse than my fucking airport. All right.
So let's talk some Stanley Cup final. I know you're going to be here next week.
We'll probably have you and Biz on together next week person but love it let's talk some Stanley Cup final because we're going to run this on Wednesday morning when uh the the first game one is happening tell me I'm crazy but I've I've loved watching the abs they're incredible I think the lightning are going to win and I don't understand why they're underdogs like I don't get you I'm with you big cat it doesn't make any sense it makes me very weary of like how the series is gonna go almost like is colorado gonna win in four or five based on that that number i think plus 150 the last time i saw it so we just did our preview uh with the chicklets boys and um r.a grinelli and myself all picked the lightning and biz is on the abs i mean i i think yeah exactly that's what i said i go perfect only thing is elio our boy elio's on tampa so i i i i lean towards goaltending it's like i i said on the show it's like it's like having the number one ace pitcher it's like having the best quarterback having the goal the goalie that is the best in the world it's like how am i going to pick against that i've i've honestly also said i will not pick against against Tampa until they lose. I picked them to win the past two Stanley Cups.
So I'm not going against the grain here. They have this ability.
Well, with their forwards up front, they can shut down any forwards because the goaltending, they can shut down a power play, even though the Rangers' power play was buzzing. But it's just such a complete team that even though Colorado has McKinnon and McCarr and McCarr after Connor McDavid is probably the best player in the league.
It's like McDavid, Matthews, McCarr, just mix and jumble them up. But this guy is such a game breaker, like a legitimate modern day ball of your.
I know it sounds crazy, but once you see him play, a lot of people who I think will tune into this cup final or maybe just fringe hockey fans will probably probably see and be like oh my god what what am I watching with this kid um so the best defenseman in the world but even having said with McKinnon and him they got the cadre injury now he could play and he's such a big factor on this team not only is he a great player but he's a rat he gets in your face he pisses you off and He had to have surgery, so his thumb is obviously messed up.

If he's able to play, he's going to be able to shoot the puck.

He'll still be able to get under people's skin,

but he's so good actually producing points.

That's a huge loss. And on the other side, Tampa's best player

besides Big Cat, the goalie,

is Braden Point. And now

it sounds like he's going to be back. Maybe not game

one. Oh, really? Early in the series.
They've

gone 8-2 without him.

I mean, they swept Florida, who won the

president's trophy. They just beat New York for

Thank you. It sounds like he's going to be back.
Maybe not game one. Oh, really? Early in the series.
They've gone eight and two without him. I mean, they swept Florida, who won the president's trophy.
They just beat New York four straight. They didn't even have him.
So to get him back, it's like the loss of Kadri, the addition of point, and the difference in goaltending. Because no matter who plays, François, François, or Kemper in Colorado, Vasilevsky's on a different planet.
So I don't understand the plus 150 number. It's so confusing to me, but I don't care.
I'm with Tampa. I feel like the experience of the goaltending is way more important in the Stanley Cup finals.
Like being in that situation in the past two years, that probably, I don't know, maybe you can tell me, do you think it makes more of a difference for a goaltender to have been there before or just, you know, a random defenseman out there? I think a goaltender. Yeah, I would agree with that.
I mean, the one thing is that that is true in terms of the cup, the cup finals that the Tampa has won. Dallas two years ago in the bubble was a good team that got hot at the right time, but totally overmatched.
And last year, Montreal was one of the worst teams to ever be in the finals.

So this is the first time that Colorado,

excuse me, Tampa's had a true test

in terms of like who they're battling against

for that final step, that final four games

you need to win to get the cup.

So that's what maybe Vegas is looking at,

but they haven't played a team this good

in the cup final yet.

And the other good thing is for the fringe hockey fan

and even the diehard hockey fan out there,

as the season began, I would actually love to,

Thank you. played a team this good in the cup final yet.
And the other good thing is for the fringe hockey fan and even the diehard hockey fan out there, as the season began,

I would actually love to maybe look and see what I told you guys back in the

middle or early in the season.

It was like,

these were the two teams that everyone kind of saw standing above and beyond

everyone else.

And the fact that they're meeting and matching up with every game on ABC,

it's the first time a cup final has had every single game on national television where you don't even need a cable package to get it. So that's pretty big for the game in terms of ABC having hopefully seven games against the two premier teams in the NHL.
So I haven't been this excited for a final in a long time. It's going to be awesome.
Now, like you just said, the last two cup finals uh the lightning have not played maybe the best possible teams because the teams got hot but could you also make the argument like they've had a tougher road to this cup final than the avalanche on paper because they played teams that won over 110 points like they so do you think that has anything to do with like how this plays out that the avalanche have had no there's no There's no easy series in the Stanley Cup playoffs, but they have not played the best goalies. They have not played the best defenses.
They haven't been tested in a way that they're going to be tested in this series. No doubt.
And then even on the flip side of that, though, it could be one of those things where Tampa's the underdog because of the rest colorado has kind of could uh taken with with how quickly they've ended the series i think i looked up their um i think they're the seventh team to ever uh just lose two games to get to the cup final they went sweep they went four to second round and then they went sweep in the third round against my oilers so yeah it's almost like like Toronto's, I mean, because of Toronto and Florida being that good, Tampa's had such a better test and then having to beat Shostakovich and the Rangers. But then on the flip side, it's like, oh, but has those three teams worn Tampa out enough that Colorado does have a leg up from only playing? I mean, what have they played? Six and plus eight, 14 games to get here.

So the thing is, Biz made a good point.

Basically, Tampa is now playing Toronto

with a better defense

and maybe a little better bottom six.

Okay.

So Toronto, I mean, Toronto had them.

They had them dead to rights.

They had them down three, two.

It was it.

And Tampa was able to claw and scratch their way back. Well, now they're dealing with Toronto, but even a little deeper and a little better.
Could you do the flip, though? Could you say that now? Let's flip it again. Well, the Avalanche are now dealing with a better Blues team who tested them and went six.
Like, plays good defense, can, you know, muck it up. Like, that's what I would see is like, that's...
Because, you know, Edmonton plays wide open. The Predators were just running off the ice.
This is the Blues series, but the Lightning are considerably better than the Blues. The Lightning are going to completely attempt and probably be at least successful in certain games at just slowing down the neutral zone.
So Colorado, they just have so much team speed. When you watch their games or their highlights in their games, you just see these teams flying through the middle of the ice, creating plays off the rush and Colorado.
I mean, Tampa is just so good at kind of figuring out how to just totally stop that momentum. And part of the reason is Anthony Sorelli.
He's a guy that I would say the, the, the fans who aren't seeing a ton of hockey, maybe not don't know, but he's just this shutdown center. He can play against the top players.
He played against Matthews. He played against Barkov in Florida and just played against the Benajad in New York and really kind of stifled these guys in terms of slowing them down five on five.
So McKinnon and Makar are going to have to be ready to deal with this guy who's just in your face, great skater, and like anyone else on Tampa, just buys into this system. Another thing at Tampa I mentioned is Alex Killorn, who had a career year, he had 25 goals in the regular season.
He had 59 points, the most he's ever had. He doesn't have a goal yet in the playoffs.
So it's like, at some point, this guy's going to break out. He's won the last two cups.
He's played a big role. All of a sudden he gets two, three, four goals in the cup final.
It's just another addition with a team who's also getting back points.

So I'm on Tampa.

I just will not pick against them.

And if they win this one, I'm picking them next year.

That's smart.

What about the altitude?

People don't talk about the altitude when it comes to hockey or basketball.

It's only in football that we talk about the altitude.

Does that make any difference whatsoever?

I think it could, but I'm guessing that Tampa is already there. Yeah, probably got there yesterday, even though the game's Wednesday.
Try to get used to that. But I mean, I remember if you if you had a trip where you'd play the Minnesota Wild, then you had to fly to Colorado after the game of playing a back to back that first period.
You're just like, or you're just maybe a little hungover. So the air matters.
air matters what um i saw you remember when portnoy didn't think about the air right like that was the air into the broncos that was his an all-time rundown clip where he's just like he came after the afc championship game the broncos beat the patriots he's like i didn't account for the air i mean people people only talk about it when it comes to football because it outdoors. And so you're surrounded by the air.
But people forget that the air gets into the building also. Yes.
Yes. You end up breathing it in the building.
We're going to get back to Ryan Whitney in a second. But before we do, I want to talk to you about our great, great friends over at Truebill.
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Start saving at Truebill.com slash take. That's True truebill dot com slash take and now here's more ryan whitney all right so you i saw a clip of you talking about uh makar who is the best defenseman like you said you know maybe one of the best top three players in the entire league can you for uh us idiots can you explain to us what makes him so special and what he does as a defenseman, both on defense and offense, that makes him that out of this world? So he is the best skater besides Connor McDavid in the league, like the fastest, best skater.
And now McDavid does it all. He's obviously a forward.
He's skating forward. He's got the cutbacks.
He can stop on a dime. He's got that extra level, that speed burst button that you could press playing old video games.
But my car, like he does it, he opens up his hip. So if you could imagine like this guy's skating forward, all of a sudden he kind of opens up his feet, opens up his hips and he starts gliding by people kind of facing like sideways.
I know it sounds so bizarre, but he's got the, hips I've ever seen. He'll skate up the ice.
He'll open up his feet. He'll buzz by people that way.
And then even if he's the first guy in offensively as defenseman, next thing you know, in the screen, you see him faster than everyone getting back. And then he, you know, pivots, starts skating backwards and he's caught up to the play.
So it's like his speed allows him to join the rush offensively. He gets back.
He's the first guy back and he's able to play 30 minutes a game. He does not get tired.
It seems like he doesn't even sweat defensively. He throws like bigger hits than people's people see like you can YouTube.
He put Jordan stall like ran him over this year and he's one of the bigger players in the league, probably six, four to ran him over so the guy's like he's just a physical specimen he's somebody who can do it all he's able to do it all with ease because of his skating he's got one of the best shots i've seen he comes over the line if he's carrying the puck he gets shots through and then on the power play he's just working the top of the blue line he has his head up the entire time and he just can really do it all I know it sounds crazy but like once you see this guy play he is a freak of nature and so the fact that they have him not only playing like defensive penalty kill playing against top lines then he gets on on on the offensive side and I swear to god he could be a forward in the league like he could if you put him up front he could probably play wing and be fine and get frigging 80 points like he does defensively. So it's just a player, like a generational type talent who I love watching.
Yeah. When I saw the clip, like I love anyone who talks about anything passionately.
And obviously you play defense and like to hear you talk about him, I was like, well, this is, you know, I know he's different. I've watched the games and been like, been like yeah he's different but to hear how excited you are to talk about him it like really hammers it home that like guys who played the same position know how special he is are you ever do you watch it and you're like man like i wish i wish i had any of like that like oh are you kidding me i wouldn't be stuck in pearson freaking airport i'd be flying a monster g5 probably myself to and from games i i you know how like you know how like i guess like my homes i guess yeah good analogy like you're like wow something's different like it's just if you know if you know sports you just you watch the game and you're like that guy i don't care if i've never watched hockey like what that guy's different than everyone else than everyone else on the ice.
Yes. And I just love that because that's what you hope to see.
And as you get older, it's like these players come along that you'll just never forget. And this kid's one of them.
It's a great point, too, because I love those guys who, if you sit down and you just sit with someone who's never watched this sport and you're like, all right, pick out the best player and they can figure it out right away. It's like, yeah it that's why he's special that's why he's different that's why you know he makes he makes these plays yeah and he does and you know what he didn't even he signed an extension um he could have got way more but he's kind of under the the the mckinnon's taking a little bit of you a lot less it's like they're starting to really in colorado figure it out like everyone takes a little bit less.
The Penguins model, the way Crosby did it, and then all of a sudden you could try to kind of go on a little run and win a few cups because when you got a couple guys making all the dough, it's just impossible nowadays to continue to win at a certain level. You're selling yourself short a little bit though.
I would say that Ryan Whitney is a guy that a nice way to say would be like you got the absolute most out of your ability no i didn't no i didn't i really didn't i got hurt but i also didn't have a great attitude and didn't approach the game maybe as professional as i would have liked in terms of the off-ice antics i did not get the most out of my my my potential i promise you so what would future ryan whitney say what would like current day current day Ryan Whitney say if he could travel back in time and talk to Lil Wit? Damn. We're now doing what's it called? Maybe one of those like when you make the NHL or I didn't think it when I made the NHL but when you have one or two good years, you have to continue to not only keep that same work ethic but probably even up it a little bit as you get a little older.
You got to work a little harder. And as I was like, after a few good years, my first and second year, my two best years, it's like, I got it.
I made it. This shit's easy.
This is the fucking NHL. Oh, my God.
That's relatable to me. Talk to me.
Find me another league. What a joke.
Yeah. And then they did in Russia.
Yeah, they did. Yeah, it was called the AHL and then the KHL.
Where do you stand on the touching of the trophies for the conference champions? Oh, we actually didn't. We had that on the outline for the show today.
We didn't talk about it. We didn't touch it in Pittsburgh.
I saw Vasilevsky touch it, so I'm guessing he's touched it the prior two years. I don't know.
It's, like, it's like foolish to me I mean, does that really affect How the Stanley Cup final goes? I don't know Whatever makes you more comfortable Playing that final series, whether you touch it or not I could care less though I feel like whatever you do, you have to do it as a team You can't have some people I know, that's what was weird, is Tampa only had one or two guys holding it Yeah, you gotta all be committed On this and say, okay, okay, yeah, we're going to touch the trophy because who gives a shit? Or, all right, guys, no one's touching the trophy and everyone's on board with that. The funny thing is, though, you talk about like, oh, don't touch the trophy.
Oh, you got to touch the trophy. It's like when you go on to win or lose, it doesn't get brought up in the post-game press conference after the cup finals.
So it's like, does it really matter? It's like, I don't know. Yeah, yeah.
I mean, we never mean we never hear from it again yeah they've done yeah i i think one team that can get a pass is probably is tampa in this in this one just whatever they do it's obviously been working um if they do win this one where do they go down as like all-time teams because three in a row is insane it's insane and pat and pat maroon would have four in a row because he had the one in st louis yeah which is wild and so the islanders they won four in a row they actually got back to a fifth in the row but edmonton beat them which kind of some people are comparing to this where it's like this new age great team this new age possible dynasty colorado could knock off tampa and end their run and start their own run.

But I got to put them with with with the parity in today and the salary cap. Like I have to put them top three greatest teams of all time.
And people will say that such recency bias because of all the dynasties that Montreal Canadiens had in the 70s, but not 32 teams, 32 teams in the league and salary. salary cap.
And the Islanders. Yeah, no cap.
Yeah.

With what they're doing and the whole process of how it's happened

in terms of them breaking all these records

and winning the President's Trophy

with one of the best regular season teams of all time in 2019

to only be swept in the first round by the eight-seed Blue Jackets.

For that to happen, that is a crossroads at an organization

Thank you. in 2019 to only be swept in the first round by the eight seed blue jackets for that to happen.
And like that is a crossroads at an organizational level. And did they trade guys? No.
Did they quit on guys? No. They made a few changes.
They made a few subtle additions and subtractions probably to change how they'd play in the playoffs. And now this has happened.
It's just such a it's such a cool story for how you don't want to give up and give in too early on an organization and a team that you think has enough to win and now they've just been unbeatable yeah it's wild okay so i mean vasilevsky guys like he's incredible stats around the stats around the league and in pro sports and like wild numbers and brady's like how many uh conference championships games he's been to in super. He's been but like Vasilevsky in the last I think eight games where you could knock a team out being eight no given up two goals like that has to be up there in terms of like mind-blowing stats in terms of a guy at the biggest moment being better than anyone else has ever been.
Yeah, he went he went zero goals against Dallas to win the Cup last year. He went one goal against the Islanders to close them out in Game 7, I believe, right? Yeah, and then he went two.
No, that was a shutout I think. It says goals against one.
He won one-nothing. What is that? He gave up a goal in the first round this series in Game 7 against Toronto and then he gave up a goal uh the other night game six against the Rangers and I think the other six games where they could close a series out I don't think he's given up a goal yeah he's been insane it's it's absolutely insane that he like and it does feel tell me if I'm wrong but it feels like the lightning or a team where this is the mark of a great team is they get better as the series goes on.
Boom. Boom.
I actually had that written down. Their worst game in every series in this run in this, what is it now? 11 series straight.
Their worst game has been game one. Yeah.
And John Cooper came out and he said, he goes, Oh, we don't like playing game ones because there's no adjustments for us to make. Right.
Because they're so good at like, all right, well, that part of the avalanche kind of exposed us in game one. We can change that in game two.
And then they just get better and better. And that's why, like, they are true champions.
But the one thing on this series, Colorado's had the rest. So Tampa had a bunch of rest.
The Rangers had played seven games against Carolina. All of a sudden, the Rangers get out to a two nothing lead lead, and Tampa's kind of rusty, and then their rest shows as the series goes on.
Well, it could be the opposite here, where Tampa played a little longer and Colorado's been chilling. Maybe Tampa starts off nice, and then Colorado gets their legs and takes over, but I can't wait to find out because I think it's going to be the best final we've had in a long time.
So let's do some, like, Avalanche win this series, how because i don't want avalanche fans to be like all he did was talk up like the lightning i probably will bet the lightning i said i was going to bet the avalanche but then i saw the number and i was like wait the two-time defending cup champions are are plus 155 okay but what like what if we're sitting here in two weeks and the avs won the series, what is the story going to be?

The story will be that they were just able with team speed

to just outskate and basically break through Tampa's championship-level defense.

I think that the main thing actually might be that they do get great coaltending

because Tampa's going to get chances.

They have such a good team no matter what.

For Colorado to win this series, Kemper or Francois, whoever ends up playing is going to have to be really good. And then after that, I guarantee you, if Colorado wins, Makar and McKinnon are both monsters the entire series.
Because also, I should mention Rantanen. He's so good, such a big horse himself as a player for the Avs of finish forward.
But I think that if goaltending's there and those three guys are lighting it up as they have been, Makar right now is no doubt the leader for the Conn Smythe. If Colorado does win, then that's what we'll look back and say.
We'll say that the horses that we thought would light it up did, and Tampa's kind of dominance came to an end. Yeah.
Yeah. So you alluded to it earlier when you talk about the Lightning and this team being like a top three team of all time potentially.
Let's say it. Like if the Lightning win the Stanley Cup, who are your top three teams? I would have to go the Islanders, Dynasties.
I mean, four in a row. And then I think I'm obviously this is really hard, but like maybe it's because I was 14 and 15 years old and it was like my favorite memories as a young kid loving hockey.
But the 97 and 98 Detroit Red Wings were like right there. You know, Mount Rushmore of great teams.
I love you. I know you guys love the Mount Rushmore.
So that I guess I'll go with those three. I mean, that's leaving out the Oilers.
That's leaving out the abs of like 2003, I think, 2001 with Ray Bork. There's just so many options.
But the lightning with three in a row in the 2020s are right there. Yeah.
And I'm looking at your Wikipedia page right now, actually. Did you know that under your personal life, it now lists in June 2022, Whitney went viral on social media for posting a video on Twitter about his frustrations during his time at the Toronto Pearson International Airport.
That's officially made your Wikipedia page now. Yeah, that's because I put it there.
I had one last question for you, Whit, and this has been awesome. Can't wait to see you next week.
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Want to say anything about the NBA? I mean, I know you've been watching. I have been watching.
Hometown team in the finals. I talked about this on Chicklets, but Steph Curry, how could you not like that guy? And besides the fact that his dad's dating his mom's ex, new boyfriend's ex.
I think that makes him more like,

but yeah,

his dad,

I love the wife swap.

I love the wife swap in the Dell Curry household,

but Steph Curry is so unreal to watch.

And like being,

uh,

putting in quotations,

a Celtics fan,

like I root for the hometown team.

So I'm watching,

I'm betting on them.

I'm rooting for them.

But after not seeing much basketball,

like when he's in those fucking grooves and there's,

he has no time or space and just chucks it up and you know,

it's going in.

It's one of the craziest things to watch.

Thank you. But after not seeing much basketball, like when he's in those fucking grooves and there's he has no time or space and just chucks it up and you know, it's going in.
It's one of the craziest things to watch. Yeah.
Yeah. It's like that guy is so clutch.
And also, like for him, he's always in the news for good things. He actually seems like a genuinely good guy.
It's just so hard not to root for him because he is he is so like, I guess, Larry Bird people would get so upset. But like, he's the best shooter of all time, right? Oh, it's not even close.
Okay, sure. Like, it's not.
I mean, it's so insane. It's absolutely insane, like, the amount of threes he's hit, the percentage, the big-time shots, like, the distance he hits him at.
Yeah, the half-court stuff and warm-ups. You're like, who is this guy? Obviously, the game's changed, so it's hard to judge, like to judge like 80s and 90s guys because they just didn't like the game was never to take threes.
But still, it's not it's not close. Like, I don't think anyone would argue that he's the greatest shooter of all time.
You know, the guy that says sick at golf, too. Yes.
That's what I was going to say, Hank. He played on a corn fairy tour event and was like, like, he's very, very good at golf.
Just a freak athlete. You know, the guys that say at hockey games, like the guys in the stands, it'll just be like, shoot it whenever you cross center ice.
You can say that to Steph Curry, and it's actually a good strategy. You don't sound like an idiot.
Yeah, it's the same as what we were saying about McCarr. Like, if you had someone who never watched NBA watch a game, the person would be like, why are there three guys chasing this guy around half court it's like well just watch he's gonna chuck one it's gonna go in and then he like you know he's like falling back as the guy's in his face and you're like there's no chance at going in it doesn't even sniff hitting the rim it's just like yep um but in terms of like ripping on the NBA a little bit oh my god Klay Thompson.
I mean you guys that was like the most pathetic ever like like yeah, we we've dealt with crowd crowds before swearing in front of children. Good job boss crying and then the fact it's so typical that they fucking pull up a clip of scumbag Warriors fans telling LeBron to blow them or quit being a bitch.
And then Draymond swearing in front of his kid at the press conference. It's like these guys.
It was a terrible, terrible look. That was one of those.
I mean, we always say on this podcast, the minute you tell someone like real classy or stay classy, you're a loser. You're a loser.
Like, just straight up, you're a loser.

I thought that moment won the series for the Celts

and then that game four, heartbreaker.

They're probably in trouble now.

Yeah, we'll see.

I mean, we're taping this right before tip-off.

Is Billy there?

No, he found out you were going to come on

and he was like, I don't want to get bodied again.

I was going to ask him, how's your Saturday?

Well, you'll see him next week

and we'll have to have you guys both on together.

It'll be awesome. Actually, it's Monday, so now would be the most appropriate day to say, how was your Saturday? So we got to get you back in here on a Thursday.
You know what? He probably knew somehow that I was going to be a part of Canadian Parliament, and that's why he was so nervous talking to me. He's like, this guy wields a ton of power.
He's like, oh, man, this guy will get me deported. Whit'm curious to know, as a fellow situatian, what's the word for somebody from situate? Situate native, I would say.
There's not really a way to describe another person. I don't know.
Sailor. As a situate native.
I didn't go to situate high, though. Have you been observing the hot streak that Hank Lockwood has been on recently? And if so, I'm curious to know if that affects your power rankings of famous situate natives.
Oh, he's always taught. He's top number one for me.
He's top one. He's just crushing life right now.
I was very, very happy to see the the ovation he got at the garden that time. I loved the fake shot Carmelo movie pulled.
I actually wondered if you shot that. Are you getting kicked out of that game? You think it goes in? I think they let him stay.
No, I was informed that definitely. No, if Dave goes in, they let him play.
And Dave's seats would have been in jeopardy. But with Dave, I don't know.
I feel like it would have been. No, I talked to the guy.
Oh, really? Yeah. He would have missed.
Yeah, he's like, Dave could have shot it, but not you. Yeah, that would have been all time if he shot it.
No, I love seeing it. Hank's crushing it.
That's my one hope. I bet the Celts before the series.
That's my one hope is that Hank's so hot, the Celts can't lose. Yeah, there you go.
What's the line tonight? Plus four? Four. Yeah, four.
Yeah, it's going to be interesting. We're about to sit in the gambling cave and watch the game.
All right, I'm going to be there on Monday morning, guys. Let's get together.
And maybe all you guys, if not, I know PFT's been to one. Maybe we're doing a Monday, the 20th, and a Wednesday, the 22nd stream at the Hoboken House for game three and four of the cup finals.
You guys want to come in? Right after Barstool Idol. Actually, Wednesday, you might be doing it at Barstool HQ with the remaining three Barstool Idol contestants.
We didn't tell you that yet. We'll torture them.
We'll torture them. I mean, that's a trial by fire.
I love it. I love it.
I appreciate you guys having me on as always. Yeah.
All right. Thanks, Whit.
Appreciate it. Thanks, Whit.
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ZipRecruiter, the smartest way to hire. Okay, we're going to finish up with Guys on Chicks, and we've got a very special guest, our good friend, four-time pro bowler, musician, co-host of Macrodosing.
It is Aaron Foster in studio for guys on chicks uh what's up what's up man you ready to do it i am okay let's get it in yeah this is uh we'll see yeah i mean we'll see how it goes you guys on chicks are you familiar with what we do we give basically the best advice possible to women who are have issues with their men or in general their own bodies oh jesus will you explain women's bodies to themselves often i'm an expert there okay arian arian did disclose the other week that he has slept with over a thousand women damn it's a round of people you keep well you don't say a thousand if it's under a thousand what if it's exactly a thousand i don't want to slight that accomplishment so like everyone in this room combined has slept with a thousand and forty women maybe that's pretty maybe that's cool yeah we're not proud of it i'm not proud of it i had a wild i had a wild go at we're all averaging like 210 yeah that's sick yeah it's like uh hank aaron and his brother i think his brother has like one home run. It's like the Aaron brothers.
Okay. All right.
Billy, take it away. So my boyfriend has been calling my feet dogs for the past week, and it's starting to get annoying.
How do I politely ask him to stop? That's one of those things in relationships where you got to be honest with your partner. It's a love language, right? So his love language might be physical appearance, but at the same breath, if something is really bothering you, then I think you got to address it or else it becomes a small landmine that'll blow up later on.
Isn't that also like that is what feet are called? Your dogs are barking. I think you got to roll with that.
I think it's only dogs if they're hurting or stinking right oh yeah but if you now is is her boyfriend like a foot guy because that's weird if he's like trying to get down with her feet and he's calling them dogs yeah that's bestiality uh-huh i think this is a sneaky like uh psychological two-way he's probably saying your feet stink and that's how he's gonna bring it up once you you say stop calling them dogs. Yeah, well maybe they should take them.
Yeah, maybe those dogs have fleas or something. See, we needed more information because if they actually stink, then you got to take care of them.
I don't think she knows that. Just double check or just ask him a question.
Like, yo, why are you calling my feet dog? Yeah, or be like what kind of dog are my feet? Because that would actually tell a lot, right? Like if it's like a big lab that just ran around in the woods, or is it like a nice, cute little Pomeranian? Yeah, we're talking about Pekingese here, and you get to dress them up, paint them real nice, groom them. So I think that's the answer.
Be like, what breed are my feet? And then you can go from there. Because that will tell you a lot.
What happens if you get in a relationship? A bulldog would be the worst, wouldn't it? A bulldog would be bad. Great Dane.
That'd be bad, too. What's the joints that can't really breathe because they face pushed in? The bulldogs.
That's a bulldog? Pugs. A pug could be cute, though.
But a pug also, they are kind of pugs. Because they're ugly, though.
Yeah, but some dudes are into ugly feet, too. Yeah, that's true.
There's some real freaks out there. Like, foot guys are fucking bizarre.
fetish for them out though call those guys out there why jerry i'm not i'm not mad i don't kink shame this month love is love i know i'm not facts but i'm not i'm not shaming i'm not kink shaming at all but it's like i i can understand if you have a kink for feet but if you have a kink for ugly feet i just need explanations i think that's okay you think it's okay yeah i mean like what if what are we gonna say like people who have a kink for like you. I just need explanations.
I think that's okay. You think that's okay? Yeah.
I mean, like, what if, what are we going to say? Like, people who have a kink for, like, you know, fat guys? Is that wrong? No. Like, some people like stuff to grab onto.
Exactly. I just want the, what's the appeal of ugly feet? I think that feet guys, I don't have a problem with, like, people that like feet, but I just think feet guys in general are, like, so, so into feet, more so than, like, if somebody is a boob fan.
If you're a boob, feet guys are like hockey fans. Well, you know what? They're like they they swear by feet.
They think everybody should love feet. And if somebody like talks about feet, they're like, what? No, I'm the expert on feet.
It's also like what the Internet has done to our society is like there's been a lot of good things. There's been a lot of bad things.
This isn't either, neither good nor bad, but feet. People have been able to be like, Oh, there's a lot of us out there.
Like 30 years ago, a feet, a foot fetish guy. I don't know where he got it off.
I don't know. You know, he didn't, he probably kept it kind of close to the best.
Now it's like, dude, every, there's a lot of feet people out there, which I think is a good thing. Yeah.
Let's all embrace each other. Yeah, community.
Yeah, right, exactly. They have a community.
I like it. Hey, guys.
I keep having sex dreams about Big Cat, and it wasn't weird until Hank and Jake showed up in the last one. How do I make it stop? Whoa.
First of all, am I good? That would be a first question. I mean, if they're reoccurring, then I would say yeah.
Yeah, I guess that's true. Well, Hank and Jake came in as backup so well i need to know what role hank and jake were playing yeah were they filming were they involved this might be the first one we need a real follow-up of um yeah i mean i i would actually say like that's we it's one of those things that people listen to us all the time and we are part of their lives so like subconsciously i had a dream the other night about um sorry i didn't mean to say it like that arian i had a dream i had a dream uh the other night where steven che and i were being chased by i don't even it was like it was like security guards in an arena and i was like god damn it steven che was in my dream so i feel like if you spend enough time listening or around someone, they sometimes will just end up in your dream, right? I bet Jake was just pounding that ass.
Yeah. You were eating the butthole? Yeah, Jake was all over the hoop.
Grabbing boards. Little known fact about our guy Jake.
He eats a great butthole. Really? Yeah.
Okay, so I was never into that, and I did use the kink shame Nat until I feel like I matured sexually, and I tried it. I didn't hate it.
I didn't hate it. But it's not my go-to, but if she wants, you know, I'm a faithful man right now.
So if she wants it, I will oblige. Any tips for him, Jake, about, you know, eating a little hoop? Well, you don't want to do it too often so that it feels even better.
It means more. It's a special occasion.
That's right. Like birthdays and anniversaries.
Exactly. If you overdo it, it doesn't have as much meaning.
I got a question. This is going to reveal me as being like a big prude.
Don't you get infections and shit from eating shit? But, bro, you don't do it after a long run. It's not after taco bell like it's only after a shower man only after the shower yeah i'm not out here just you gotta take proper cleaning procedures hey you need to up your fiber because i was i was watching uh i was watching the colin froth show the staircase it's like the the dramatized version of that documentary that came out a while ago and there's one scene in it where his wife just got, I think she got

back from a workout and he's in the

kitchen and he just straight up pulls her pants

down and goes right for the butthole.

And I'm like, this dude's got pink eye.

He's going to be looking like Bob Costas in a second.

Yeah, that's not the ideal way to go about that.

I'm very hygienic.

Yeah, everyone should practice

good hygiene.

Hey PMT, about a year ago my husband and I got a dog and named him Baker. Huge Browns fans.
Obviously, with all the QB things going on, we are now stuck with a dog that doesn't really play for our team anymore. What should we do, and should we rename him? I mean, if he starts humping everything, then he's Deshaun.
Yeah, I was going to say, like, Baker's not that bad. If you named it Deshaun, it'd be way worse.
Yeah, way worse. I mean, Arian, as an NFL player, you took care of your body, I would assume, throughout the years.
Did you ever hear about somebody using like 66 different masseuses on their own.

What is that average a month?

It's a lot.

What's that?

I don't know.

Well, there was multiple visits.

No, it would be like three a month, right?

Yes.

A little quick math.

Five times 12 would be 60.

It's 17 months.

I don't know about the situation, right?

I don't know. It's wild accusations because it's all allegedly still, right? Yeah.
Okay. And so all I say is from my experience, athletes that find a masseuse or whatever the case, they usually stick with it because him or her because they hit all your rights.
They know what you want, and you don't have to always go in and explain what you want. So throughout my career, I played eight years.
I had three. Right.
And I only switched because, like, something shiesty happened with the first one, and then they moved. So I had to get another one.
But it's like. It would be like, I mean, if the headline instead was Deshaun Watson had 66 different throwing coaches in 17 months, everyone would be like, what? Or dentists.
Yeah, like, what's going on here? Yeah. No, yeah.
It's definitely atypical. It raises a red flag.
Like I said, I don't know. I wasn't there.
Let that get dealt with. He also brought his own towel to the massages too which is like is that a real? Yeah.
Like his own like a mercenary going to war bringing their own gun. He's like going to all these appointments he's like I brought my towel it's just the right size that I like.
It's like a pool shark. And I'm taking it with me because it might be entered as evidence in some future.
I can't call it. It sounds it sounds predatory I ain't lie.
But 66 is a lot. It's a ton.
As for this question, though, I think you just got to put the dog on waivers because it feels like that's just going to happen, right? Like the Browns are going to have to cut them at some point if they can't find a trading partner. Stop naming your dogs after sports figures that aren't Hall of Famers.
Yeah, that's a good point. That's a very good point.
That's why I say, like, buying a jersey of a current player is always a roll of the dice, too. Yeah, definitely.
Yeah. Dog seems a little more permanent than a jersey.
Or, like, naming your kid after a player. Yeah, and even that, like, you never know what could, you know.
I bet you there's some people who name their kids OJ in the 80s. That's still okay, though.

Yeah, actually, you could.

There's enough OJs out there.

I love orange juice.

That's true.

OJ Mayo is my guy.

100%.

Yeah, you know what I mean?

But maybe don't name him after a player unless he's been to at least two or three All-Star

games.

Yeah, that's fair.

That's a good little rule of thumb.

That's fair.

Yeah, you're naming your dog on potential if you're calling him Baker.

This one you can just say, I think one of you either has to go to culinary school or you got to get rid of the dog. Culinary school would probably be the more humane way, right? Or maybe she already bakes and you could just...
Yeah, there you go. Just get a specialty that everyone knows you for in your town.
You bake the best apple pie. That's why your dog's named Baker.
Or become stoners. Yeah, that too.
Baked. That's probably better.
Give the dog weed. Which is funny as hell if you've ever done that.
It's really dangerous. What, get your dog's weed? No, he's not happy about that one.
Or is Billy just saying, like, smoking weed? I don't care about that part. That's hilarious.
Billy's a narc. Billy would be...
Billy's going to call the cops on you. You're not allowed to smoke around my dog.
It's like, what if the dog, some mental problem? I would love to see your dog's diet because all the shit you put in your body. Everything Billy knows from weed is from like a 1950s ad of people losing their mind.
Have you seen Reefer Madness? It's a documentary. Exactly, exactly.
Hey, PMD boys. My fiance has had zero involvement in the wedding planning process, but is now mad because our primary date is during football season.
Oh, he's saying things like we'll have a TV at the reception, right? Well, I hope, you know, I'm booked from Thursday to Monday on the honeymoon. If this happens, I don't know what to do.
Do I move it or accept the fact that I'll be watching football four days a week on my honeymoon? Okay, so it's more about the wedding. It sounds to me like he found out what the schedule was going to be, and there's a big game for whatever his college football team is.
It's taking place on that Saturday. And I feel like if it's taking place in the South, if you're getting married.
I went to a wedding in South Carolina one time where everybody involved was a massive Alabama fan. You just have to bite the bullet and have a TV there because otherwise people are going to be watching on their phones.
Also, this is 100% on him. I mean, if you're that big of a fan, you have to at least know when the date is, right? Like the date is, you can be not involved, but the date is a pretty big decision.
And if you're a big football fan, you're like, wait, oh, that's October on a Saturday? No thanks. I think the only acceptable weekend as a college football fan to have a wedding is week two.
Because that's when it's always like. I think, is that? No, that's not Notre Dame, Ohio State.
But that's usually the week, you know what I'm saying? Where they play the out of conference, like the bye games. Yeah, yeah.
Where you're going to win no matter what. What's her name? They don't do names? They don't do names.
Look, shorty, use this and I'm going to tell you why. Honeymoons are just extended vacations.
And if you've ever been on a vacation for more than three or four days, it gets boring. So use that time.
It's a great feel of time. I think this is a good time not only that that's one two this is who your husband is so you're gonna have to deal with this that's true anyway so so this is the man you decided to spend the rest of your life with this is a microcosm of what your life is going to be just enjoy it that's a that's a good point like this is you you signed up for this in some way like you know that he again i i i'm throwing a flag on this guy's football fandom the fact that like the the fall football the fall wedding was even agreed to because i know that like i'll have friends who will say hey my wedding's in the fall and i'll be like on a saturday i'm not gonna make it so like there's i i don't know it's just i i'm throwing a flag this guy.
I feel like he's not as big of a football fan. But she said he wasn't involved.
Right, but the date – He still has – I assume he would have a say in the date, although it's more than likely that she just picked a date. He was like, sure, that sounds great.
There's also one other path here, and this is what they call the mature path. And it's very difficult, but if you're the guy and the woman can explain this to him, it is one Saturday when you have like, you know, hopefully 60, 70 more years of your life.
You can give up one Saturday. Again, I'm not mature enough to think this way, but some people can be like, you know, let's enjoy this one moment with our friends and family and the people

we love the most and not worry

about football and then we have

the rest of our lives to worry about football again

I do not think you should do this

but it is something

you could potentially do I think

it's a potential thing you could do as

as the groom in this situation

but then you also have to think about the guests

because the guests will just complain about it

but the guests can just figure it out

like if there's a bar or something around

I'm going to go just complain about it. I thought this was the honeymoon.

But the guests can just figure it out.

Like if there's a bar or something around,

there's part of the honeymoon too.

I think it's a combo.

I think he's got the double whammy.

It's a double week.

Yeah, you just got to eat that one.

All right, I'm looking right now.

Kentucky, Florida, I definitely want to watch.

Also, look up the U Miami schedule.

Did some detective work and it's a Miami error code. USC, Stanford is always a game I want to watch.
Also, look up the U Miami schedule. It did some detective work, and it's a Miami error code.

USC Stanford is always a game I want to watch.

Mississippi State at Arizona late night.

Is it Miami?

It's Miami, yeah.

Could also be a Florida State fan.

Okay.

Southern Miss at Miami.

That should be a win for Miami.

Yeah, you can win.

Fun belt.

Wisconsin's playing Washington State. That's one you want to throw on there.
Houston and Texas Tech. Dana Holgerson, Texas Tech.
There's going to be some points in that game. Iowa, Iowa State.
Come on. That's the Cyhawk.
Yeah, you're going to have to pick another week. I've just done a quick peruse of week two.
Also, before you get married, you should already, if there's anything that you think that you might want to do for the rest of your life. I had a boss that used to talk about this a lot.
Start doing that hobby before you get married. Because otherwise, if you pick up, let's say it's poker.
Let's say after, like, 10 years of being married and you start playing poker, your wife's going to be like, why is he playing poker all of a sudden? He never used to play poker. So if there's even, like, a small part in the back of your brain.
Don't grow after marriage. Yeah, if there's a small part that's like you might want to take a bowling at some point, start bowling now.
Start bowling. Alabama's playing Texas at noon.
Oh, okay, wedding's off. This is over.
Wedding's off. Divorce.
Tennessee at Pittsburgh. That's going to be a little revenge game, Arian.
I know you don't really care about the Vols. Did they lose last year? Yeah, they lost the pit last year last year Wake Forest vs Vanderbilt That's actually kind of a fun game Because it's like two similar teams in their conference In their colors too So there's a lot of games that you're not going to want to miss Hi guys I've been living with my boyfriend for six months now And everything has been better than I could have expected Better than I could have asked for expect okay they wrote this wrong I could have asked better than I could ask for when my boyfriend uses the bathroom and poops I found a little bit of poop on the back of the seat now at first I thought it was a one-time thing but it has continued to happen I'm afraid to say something because I feel that he's old enough to not do this I don't know any advice.
I don't know any advice would help. Thanks, guys.
Scoot up. You have to check all the security tapes because you never know who actually pooped on the toilet seat.
Scoot up. What is wet? What? I don't know how that happens.
Scoot up. I've been shitting for 37 years now, and I don't think I've ever pooped on a toilet seat.
That's insane. Well, I'm trying to think.
Have you, Billy? Are you looking like I could relate? It's possible if you have an explosive problem getting there. Yeah, but multiple times.
I agree with you, Billy. There are definitely times I can't definitively sit here and say I've never pooped on a toilet seat.
I'm not ready to say that. I mean, if I have, I definitely left it a mess because I didn't see it.
Right. No, I know I've done it, but it's like Billy's saying, an explosive problem.
It's like, oh shit, this is a nice shit. I got it, bro.
I got it. Okay.
This is not a plug, but a squatty potty will help this out. You're going to potty train your husband? This is why.
This is why. Just introduce it to him and show him the commercial with the unicorn, right? And the reason as to why, I swear to saying the ad, i use this is what it is um we sit regular right and that messes up our bowel movements right so if he's leaning forward while he while he dropping a deuce it could be coming out the wrong angle but the squatty potty lifts your knees to your chest and the angle is downward that's how we evolve to actually defecate.
So this might fix it and help both of y'all.

Maybe also like a treat system if he does it cleanly.

Give emoji stickers.

Yeah, like a lollipop every time he comes out of the toilet.

Like, ooh, no poop on the seat.

I've heard Aaron talk about the squatty potty before.

I've heard other people endorse it.

I think Chaps talks about it a lot.

And I'll be honest with you guys.

I've tried the squatty potty.

It seems like a problem that didn't really need solving for me.'ve never been like there must be a better way to shit here's another thing you could do real quick you just uh dematrically wrong what about what about it what about an airport where they have the the little liner that rotates maybe get that in your house that would the what the you know like when you go sit on an airport toilet some of them have it where there's like a liner. It's like a piece of paper that goes and then you hit the button and then it rotates.
I got you. So like it goes around so it's a fresh piece of paper.
Got you. That would do it right away, right? Yeah.
Or maybe it's the toilet. The seat could be too small.
Yeah. Or too big.
His ass is too fat. And that's why the shit's getting on it.
Yeah. Well top of his ass might be like sitting all the way in the pad.
Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Just scoot up.
Yeah. But there might not be room.
I hate when there's like the toilet seats are like only like a foot and a half, a foot. Yeah.
There might also be something medically wrong with his butthole. Remember like those super soakers where you could turn the nozzle and then shoot your friend that was standing to the side of you? Maybe his butthole points backwards.
You could also put maybe two footprints where he should be sitting so he scoots up. Like the mats that teach you how to dance? Yeah, right, exactly.
It's just like you don't even tell them because if you see them, you'll always just put your feet in them. You have to, yeah.
And there you go. Also, Japanese toilets are amazing.
I don't know if you've ever... I learned that from cars too.
It's amazing, yeah. What's a Japanese toilet? They just care.
I don't know how else to put it, but they're angled in a certain way. They're heated.
They're cooled. They have a bidet in them.
It's just the most amazing experience I've ever had. Not just even a bidet, like a whole car wash.
They have everything. On the side of the toilet, they have a whole system.
It's like a remote, and you can do things that I haven't even tried yet. Wow.
I'm excited to get back on. Now I want to go to Japan.
Yeah. Just take a shit there.
What if we get one for the office? A Japanese toilet? I'm sure you can order one. I don't think this office can handle anything nice.
It would just be destroyed right away. That's fast, i was here i had to go to the bathroom and they told me not to go in yet because somebody did a thing pooped on the toilet yeah no yeah that was a big incident dumb and dumber did y'all find out who it was uh yeah yeah we did yeah is it is it can't say the name i got got you, got you.
Yeah. That's cool.

I would like to know off-air.

I will tell you the name off-air. You could probably guess, too, and you'd be right.

Who would you guess in this office?

But don't say the name.

Just mentally, everyone watching on YouTube, mentally just think of who you think it could be,

and we'll see it in the glimmer of your eye.

I don't know that many people here, but of the people that I know here, I mean. You know yeah exactly he's got it he knows okay those are all our questions oh man yeah all right well i think that was good uh arian what else you got going on i mean it's good to see you in new york yes lovely to come man i i i love the city in splices yeah great great city to visit yeah it's good city visit i don't like to stay here too long yeah um because i like the the the mean energy everybody has like i'm a really friendly dude and so when i walk around i'm like hey how you doing everybody's like fuck off yeah i like that you know it reminds me it is keep my guard up when you go somewhere else if you live in new york you realize so quickly like you're like wait everyone's not just on edge and like like like two seconds away from a fist fight at all times at all times it's a very bizarre feeling for a while those uh those think pieces of people being like this is why i'm leaving new york we used to always go viral online people that would just like decide to move and then they'd write an essay about like everybody wanted to know the reason why i saw one now it's starting to happen in reverse people being like, I moved to the South during the pandemic.
Everybody was friendly. Now I'm moving back to New York.
Here's why. To be with that.
And this person was like, I, all the Southern hospitality sucks. Like people are too nice.
I want to go for a walk and have everybody be like, I'm minding my business. Yeah.
Scowling. Yeah.
I want people to hate me. Makes sense.
I feel like a lot of people like leave the city city not as assholes, but they're assholes in other states. Right, and everyone's like, get the hell out of here.
Yeah, everyone's mean to them in other states because they're a dickhead. Right.
Then they come back with a bunch of other assholes. At the Overton window.
You're a nice guy here, but over in other places you're an asshole. Yeah, right.
You are the biggest dickhead in the world. It's like when you fly somewhere and then you get in an Uber and the person starts talking to you.
And you're like, I just want to fucking sit in the back of this car. It's so crazy they haven't figured out it just like.
Because I know there is like when you get an Uber driver that might not speak English and it will say like, hey, this Uber driver might not speak English. There should be the reverse where it's like, I don't want to talk.
There is. You can say no conversation.
It said no conversation. You can pick the temperature.
I've seen the temperature. I didn't see see the no conversation that's uber black that's if you're a high roller like arian oh that's if you played in the league wow i mean you have the option as well relatable you have the option as well i got into an uber when i was in nashville and this lady had uh just pictures of dogs all over a car oh even nightmare on the on the window yeah arian hates.
That's true. Even pictures on the windows of like random dogs.
And I got in. I was like, so you're a dog owner? And the lady was like, no, no.
I just like dogs. And she started talking about her favorite breeds of dogs.
A legit murderer. Didn't own a dog.
Wow. Legit.
That's crazy. Legit got bodies in the basement.
It is funny when you get an Uber in a smaller town and it's like just the person's car and they didn't like you know what i mean like it's like you picked up in like a pickup truck yeah they're like their their dinner is right next to them because they just went they're like i'm just going to pick up dinner and i'll grab a uber passenger real quick matter of fact the uber driver here like i landed like it was like two in the morning he picks me up and i found out he was uh what was it i told you what's the name periwinkle not periwinkle the drove in the morning. He picks me up and I found out he was, what was it? I told you, what's the name?

Periwinkle? Not Periwinkle.

Rocky and Bullwinkle?

He drove in the buses and he was a hippie in the 60s.

Oh, the Merry Pranksters.

He was a Merry Prankster.

And he starts talking to me about psychedelics and quantum mechanics and shit.

And usually I don't like talking, but that was an interesting conversation.

Yeah, you should read the book, The Ken Kesey Acid.

That's what he was saying.

He was like, you got to read the book, man.

So I Googled it.

So I ordered it on Amazon.

Nice.

It is a good book.

Yeah, Grateful Dead used to play at those concerts.

Like,

Thank you. Yeah, you should read the book, the Ken Kesey acid.
That's what he was saying. He was like, you got to read the book, man.
So I Googled it. So I ordered it on Amazon.
Nice. It is a good book.
Yeah, Grateful Dead used to play at those concerts. At those fests where they just all did acid for days on end.
Yeah. It was a dope conversation.
Different times. Yeah.
I mean, I wasn't there. Yeah.
Sure they were different. All right.
You want to pick a number? We do pick numbers. Okay.
Is there any specific reason? If you win, you get satisfaction.

All right.

What am I trying to...

If you win, you have one more win than Hank.

Yeah.

You just get satisfaction.

But how do you win those?

You just pick the number, and if you're correct, you win.

All right.

But how do I know if I'm correct?

Because we're going to do the lottery machine.

Okay.

All right.

So just say a number.

Oh.

Any number.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Then I hit the button.

Oh, gotcha.

And it's 1 through 100?

1 through 100.

And it looks like 36 is out.

So don't pick 36.

All right.

I'm going to go with, let's go 63.

Okay, 54.

I'll go with 26.

6.

I'll do 6 more than Arian.

11 for Evan.

You're trying to price this right? 5? 25. No, you pick 69 every time.
You like this machine? I got it for $1,000 in China. I like it.
I'm going to upgrade at some point. Oh, Babe Ruth, number three.
Oh, wow. How many times, Jake? Fifth time.
Fifth time for number three. It's a wagon.
Really? How many times have you done it? Hundreds, probably. Yeah, way too many.
It's really the most pointless thing in the world. I like it.
It's basically a test to see, like, can you be fascinated with ping pong balls being chosen randomly? And the answer is yes. Always.
Y'all should have tracked it. We do.
No, Jake just said. That's the fifth time number three has been taken.

So if the laws of physics are correct, it will end up looking like a wave eventually.

We still have seven numbers that haven't been picked in almost two years.

Wow.

Really?

Yeah.

It's crazy.

That's interesting.

All right.

That's the show.

Thank you, Arian.

Well, appreciate y'all having me.

Lions used to exist in america love you guys We're talking away. We're talking away.
We're talking away. I don't know what I'm saying I'll say it anyway Today's another day So I ain't shying away I'll be coming for your love of faith I'll be coming for your love of faith Take on me Take take me on.
I'll be gone after I'm too. Needless to say, I've always said it, but I'll keep throwing it away.
Telling them that life is okay Say after me It's better to be safe than sorry It's better to be safe than sorry Take on me Take me on I'll be gone in a day or two. I'm going to be so.
I'm going to be so. I'm going to be so.
I'm going to be so. I'm going to be so.
I'm going to be so. Just play my worries away.
You're all the things I've got to remember. You're shying away.
I'll be coming for you anyway. I'll be coming for you anyway.
Take on me. Take me up

I'll be gone

In a day

I'll be gone

In a day. I'll be good in a knee.