Max Homa, Kansas Wins The National Championship And Guys on Chicks

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Speaker 1 On today's part of my take, we have our good friend Max Homa to get us ready for the Masters. He's going to make the cut this year, guaranteed.

Speaker 1 Hold on, PFTE say something nice about Max while I drink a little water.

Speaker 3 I think that Max Homa's hats have gotten exponentially better over the last like three years. When we first saw him break out onto the tour, they looked like they were prescription sombreros.

Speaker 3 They've shrunk down to normal size now.

Speaker 1 Yep, I'm back. Good point.

Speaker 1 We also have our recap of the championship game, New Orleans weekend. We're back in studio.
Billy's back with us. We got guys on chicks, hot seat, cool throne.

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Speaker 4 Now in the street, there is violence.

Speaker 4 And then a lot of

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Speaker 4 No place to hang out or washing.

Speaker 4 And then I can't blame all on the sun. Oh no, we're gonna rock it down to Electric I rend you.

Speaker 4 And then we'll take it higher.

Speaker 4 Oh, we're gonna rock it down to Electric Irish.

Speaker 1 It's part of my take presented by Barstool Sports.

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Speaker 1 Today is Wednesday, April 6th, and the Kansas City Jayhawks are national champions. Thank you, Mark Emmert.

Speaker 3 Congratulations, Kansas City.

Speaker 1 Yes, all

Speaker 3 actually in the Missouri. The college is located in Missouri.

Speaker 1 To really piss off people, it was a great great moment to have Mark Emerit give the

Speaker 1 trophy to Bill Self, who is facing five, what is it,

Speaker 1 level one violations, which sounds very serious, but a great national championship game.

Speaker 3 It's funny to think that like a level one sanction is like he emailed a kid during the wrong month of the calendar year. Right.

Speaker 1 It's also just a perfect, like

Speaker 1 like it is the perfect tr like champion for this day and age where it's like the rules have changed. I'd say most people don't give a fuck about like college players getting paid whatsoever.

Speaker 1 And the NCAA has just been dragging their feet, so they could have taken care of this a long time ago. Instead, they're giving a trophy to a school that is also facing violations.

Speaker 3 But this was also justice, though, for Kansas for 2020, because going into that tournament, remember we sat down, we did the fake bracketology when we found out that we had the tournament ripped from our hands on the eve of the coronavirus.

Speaker 3 And I think we had Kansas as the number one overall seed. I think we picked them to win the championship in 2020 in the fake bracket.
It's good to see Kansas get this back.

Speaker 1 I like it.

Speaker 3 I like it when a state like Kansas, they've got one thing that they really care about, and that's just college basketball. It's good to see them get back in the winner circle.

Speaker 1 Yeah, they were

Speaker 1 28 and 3 in 2020, and they looked like the best team in the country.

Speaker 1 It's a testament to how crazy this tournament is. Kansas, if you went back and looked, like since they last won in 2008, this is not even close to their best team, but that doesn't matter.

Speaker 1 The tournament is, you know,

Speaker 1 every single year we see the most talented team or the best team falter or a team that doesn't look like they have it all and they get to the final four.

Speaker 1 So this just proves like, hey, the tournament is its own entity and being able to win and cut down the Nets in the last weekend or the first weekend of April, last weekend of March, it doesn't really matter if you are the best Kansas team they've they've had in the last 15 years, and they deserve it.

Speaker 1 And they were the better team on Monday night. That 16-point comeback, 15-point comeback at halftime was incredible.

Speaker 1 Their defense just shut down UNC.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 Bill Self, here's my question. Bill Self, is he now, and Jake, feel free to chime in.
Does Bill Self now, out of all the active coaches, have the second best resume only to Rick Patino?

Speaker 1 His resume is pretty incredible at this point.

Speaker 1 Like, this second one for Bill Self puts him in rarefied air, and it puts him, it kind of like cements everything that he's done at Kansas and how consistently great they've been year in and year out.

Speaker 1 Coach Cal. Cal has one.

Speaker 5 I think Jay Wright, too.

Speaker 1 Jay Wright has

Speaker 1 a chance to have three and six years. Well, but I mean, yeah, Kansas has also had a chance for a lot.

Speaker 1 Yeah, well, so had to before. Yeah, Jay Wright would be, you could throw him out there.
Bill Self has more wins than Jay Wright.

Speaker 1 Bill Self also has gone to the tournament 23 straight years, and that's including three different teams. So that's Tulsa, Illinois, and Kansas.

Speaker 1 He's also, out of those 23 years, 12 out of 23, he's gotten to at least the Elite Eight.

Speaker 3 They don't lose early.

Speaker 5 Like Duke has to Mercer and Lehigh can talk you to St. Peter's.

Speaker 1 They always get. They make a little bit of a run.

Speaker 1 They always make a run, which is crazy.

Speaker 1 The consistency to get to Elite Eight half of the years that you're in the tournament and you're in the tournament every year.

Speaker 1 That's pretty... I think any fan base would sign up for that.

Speaker 1 They win the Big 12 every year, they win the Big 12 tournament every year, and now he has two, which is that's like what puts him ahead: Izzo and Bayheim and those guys.

Speaker 3 They were quadruple champions, right? They won the Big 12 tournament, they won the Big 12 regular season. Yes, they won the Midwest bracket, and then they won the championship.

Speaker 1 Yes, big crown of all for them. Crown of all.

Speaker 3 Jake, how did your final last redemption bracket do?

Speaker 5 I actually forgot to cement it. I was going to say Kansas.

Speaker 1 Ah, it doesn't count though. It doesn't count.

Speaker 3 Yeah, so you went over

Speaker 1 four on brackets? Three. Over three.

Speaker 5 But the third one was on purpose. You guys won't believe me, though.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we won't believe it. Yeah, no.
But that was never. I mean, Kansas,

Speaker 1 I think Bill Self is. I think you make that argument.

Speaker 1 Besides Rapetino, because if you just look at the totality of everything that he's done, I think he's like somewhere four or five on the active list for wins.

Speaker 1 And obviously, this conversation happens because Coach K just retired.

Speaker 1 But

Speaker 3 Well, Coach K's legacy is also forever stained. Well, it's like if Bill Self lost two important games to end his season this year, we would put that as a big knock.
He would not be in the Rick Petino.

Speaker 1 Tyler's not the most final for him.

Speaker 3 Rick Petino remains unstained.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 1 Tyler Hansborough.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Tyler Hansborough. He's receptive.

Speaker 5 He's retired. He's over.

Speaker 1 We talked to Tyler Hansborough on Monday when he came on Barcelona Live at Walk-Ons. Shout-out walk-ons.
And he said that was Coach K's last game, but not his last season.

Speaker 1 because he's going to keep his corner office. He's going to hover over the whole program.
But this isn't about Coach K. This is about Bill Self.

Speaker 1 And Bill Self, he might be facing these sanctions, but this really was like a legacy cementer for him because getting that second is very, very important.

Speaker 1 And like he said before this Final Four, like it now validates. all those elite eights, all those Big 12 titles, regular season and tournament.

Speaker 1 The entirety, like the totality of his resume now is insanely impressive to to win titles 14 years apart.

Speaker 3 The game was also insane. It was a crazy game.
So it started out, Kansas looked like they were going to just put it on in the first couple minutes.

Speaker 3 Then UNC went on a run for the ages, and it looked like UNC was going to win by 15, 17 points. The first half was like as bad as it could have gone for Kansas.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I don't think anybody gave him any shot to win. I know I didn't.
I basically just gave up at that point.

Speaker 3 I went upstairs, took a shit, which, by the way, I don't know if you guys are feeling the same way I am, but like, I don't think I've pooped as much in terms of times, visits to the bathroom as I've made in the last 36 hours after being in New Orleans.

Speaker 6 I'm on a pretty regular schedule.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I'm doing okay. You're really, yeah, I'm doing all right.

Speaker 3 It's really, all the holes are open right now.

Speaker 3 But yeah, it was bad. Back to the game.
But back to the game.

Speaker 1 Hubert Davis in halftime, by the way. I'm going to listen.
Big cat.

Speaker 3 Let you do your basketball takes the way you want to. I'm going to do my basketball takes the way you want to.
Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 So back to the game.

Speaker 3 I was taking a shit at halftime. Okay.
And after I finished my shit, don't get mad that we I came downstairs and I watched the second half.

Speaker 3 And in the second half, it was also just like crazy stuff was happening to UNC left and right. There was the floor that buckled

Speaker 3 underneath Armando Bakot. And then there was the

Speaker 3 Caleb Love also like re-injured his leg a little bit.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he twisted his ankle. And then Manic was just all over the place.

Speaker 3 It was crazy. Like, I don't recall seeing a championship game that had swings.
Usually when there's a close game, it stays close the entire time.

Speaker 3 It's not like there's ever a time where there are two swings back and forth.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I mean, well, Puff Johnson also puked. It was UNC's resiliency was insane this entire tournament, this entire season.

Speaker 1 I do think that that floorboard thing is insane. Like, that,

Speaker 1 and

Speaker 1 who knows?

Speaker 1 Kansas might win anyway, but Baycott gets hurt, and then the game-winning shot is McCormick down low on a mismatch with Manix, so everything is because Baycott steps on a floorboard that's not properly put in.

Speaker 1 The NCAA should be ashamed.

Speaker 1 Look at that. Yeah, it was crazy.

Speaker 3 That gym that Zion was jumping off of the other day, which I found out, the Slambo court looking for it.

Speaker 3 It's actually, yeah, it's a recovery cord that they use for softer landings and softer takeoffs.

Speaker 3 For injured players, just to walk around on it

Speaker 1 all the time.

Speaker 1 But yeah, it like buckled underneath him.

Speaker 1 I don't know how that happens.

Speaker 1 Hubert Davis, what I was going to say at halftime, I wasn't judging you for shitting. I just don't have the same, I didn't have the same issues.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 So so what I was gonna say was at halftime, Hubert Davis was like, everyone thought we were gonna have a letdown spot in this championship game.

Speaker 1 This is a championship game, we want to win this game, and it felt like a little bit like he was like, We got this, it's good, we're up 15.

Speaker 1 So, if you were waiting for the letdown spot, it was just you just had to wait a half because then, and UNC was battered and bruised, and everyone got hurt, and man, it got smoked three times in the face.

Speaker 1 But UNC, like they're they win toughest team award for fighting till the bitter end, and Kansas is your champion.

Speaker 3 Walking around town after the game was over, we ran into a few different UNC fans, and they were all like super happy still. That was their national championship on Saturday night.

Speaker 3 On Monday, they were just like, you know what, we're glad to be here. We beat Coach K.
That's fine.

Speaker 3 I saw a couple UNC fans this morning and I love this move because Hank and I saw this back in New Orleans after Clemson lost to LSU.

Speaker 1 The morning after the game, you go out there and you put on your shirt of when your team did win the championship like two years ago I saw a few UNC fans walking around wearing old championship shirts it's like well we still have this one well and and I think UNC fans obviously I they're probably very disappointed but they're they're an eight seed that had lost to Pittsburgh at home in like late February they don't have a like NBA crazy NBA talent neither does Kansas really Abaji will be a good NBA player I would assume I mean who else Jake like McCormick is probably going to be yeah you know and and like yeah Wilson's been back and forth.

Speaker 1 Yeah, there'll be guys who will make who will be in the NBA, but there are, neither team has like top three picks.

Speaker 1 So it's UNC is getting there, and none of those guys are these names that you're like, oh, we're going to watch him for the next 15 years.

Speaker 3 They are great names, though. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Like Austin.

Speaker 3 I mean, Mark. Star Johnson, Remy Martin, Caleb Love.

Speaker 3 It's awesome.

Speaker 1 Yeah. It was, yeah, I mean, it was a good Final Four.
Great Final Four. Great march.
Oh, Hank's rolling his eyes.

Speaker 1 You can't say it it was a great Final Four.

Speaker 6 For the fans, yeah.

Speaker 1 For the fans? Yeah. It was better than last year.
Who else would have been? In the year before.

Speaker 6 Yeah. Best Final Four in the last three years.

Speaker 1 There we go.

Speaker 6 Actually, no, last year's was probably better.

Speaker 5 Last year, we had a buzzer beater.

Speaker 1 Yeah. All right.
Well, I'm waiting.

Speaker 3 I'm withholding judgment until I find out exactly what the ratings were on these. That's the only time I can truly understand whether a game was good or not to watch.

Speaker 1 Well, I don't think there would be that. They're not going to be historical by any measure because it was TBS, not CBS.
right? Which they change back and forth every year.

Speaker 5 Yeah, so the Duke UNC, obviously.

Speaker 1 It's got to be like one of the highest ratings.

Speaker 1 It'll be remembered as one of the best ever. Let's find it.
Maybe watched. And the last, can you find the ratings for us, Jake? With the Duke UNC because we'd like to.

Speaker 1 PFT is right, whether we like the game or not.

Speaker 1 The final thing we have for March Madness is Billy. Billy and the sheet.
The conclusion of the sheet.

Speaker 1 Reminder for everyone out there: we gave Billy $2,000

Speaker 1 cash to start, he got very scared of it, to start the tournament, and he was going to employ his arbitrage and whatever split strike trading methods, whatever he was going to do to get a profit.

Speaker 1 And did you get a profit?

Speaker 7 We did get a profit. Yeah.

Speaker 1 There is profit. Let's go, Billy.
Yes.

Speaker 7 So we put we put originally we put $5 on upsets, $20 on futures of the favorite, and that only cost about $700 in the beginning.

Speaker 7 And then we used the rest of the $1,300 to sort of see how it played out, put more futures in different places

Speaker 7 to hopefully, in the end, get profit.

Speaker 7 If UNC had won, we would have made $700 profit. But, you know, going to the game where it's like we are either going to win $50 or $700,

Speaker 7 you know, kind of

Speaker 1 profit to profit.

Speaker 3 So we ended up winning $50 profit.

Speaker 7 $50 profit.

Speaker 1 Oh, that's what's in there. That's $25 per person.

Speaker 7 Yeah, and I brought a lot more cash.

Speaker 1 Oh, nice. There we go.

Speaker 7 We got a brick of cash.

Speaker 1 Oh, my God. How much is in that?

Speaker 7 We got $2,050 in ones in a brick.

Speaker 1 Download the YouTube to see this. Where did you get this?

Speaker 3 It's like shrink-wrapped.

Speaker 7 Well, look, you know, I had to strap it.

Speaker 1 You got to go to the strip club. Yes.
No. Why did you give him ones? Bonk.
Bunk. Well, it was a weird ATM.

Speaker 3 But yeah. Wait, it was a weird ATM?

Speaker 1 Look, I had to get this. You basically just handed us no no cash back.
Ones I can't do anything with.

Speaker 3 You know what we have to do with this? We just have to toss it up in the air. We have to make it rain in the studio with this cash that Billy made us.

Speaker 1 Billy, I thought we were going to redeposit and do a master's bet.

Speaker 7 Well, we can't do that.

Speaker 7 I did this before.

Speaker 1 Give it back to him. I honestly, I honestly wouldn't.
Give it back to him for sure.

Speaker 3 Okay, well, the first thing I'm going to do is I'm going to make it rain in the studio.

Speaker 1 And then Billy's job is going to be to do it. No, that's fucked up.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Here.

Speaker 3 Wait, I just want to hold the cash for a second.

Speaker 7 Yeah, there's tons of, it's in ones and fives.

Speaker 3 They're They're just using rubber bands at the bank now?

Speaker 1 Yeah,

Speaker 7 it was pretty cool going to the bank and getting that out. I wanted to at least give you guys what seemed like more cash than you gave me just

Speaker 1 paper. That was very

Speaker 7 smart. Yeah, so there's tons of cash.

Speaker 7 But yeah, it came out profit. So good job, Billy.

Speaker 1 I'm proud of you.

Speaker 7 Shout out Berserker Sheets.

Speaker 1 Oh, I see a five in there.

Speaker 3 There's a couple fives mixed in, yeah.

Speaker 1 There you go.

Speaker 7 Yeah, so it's just a ton of cash.

Speaker 1 You know what, David? I want to roll it. I want to roll it over.
I don't want this money back.

Speaker 3 It's so so much money that they had to weigh it when they gave it to us.

Speaker 7 I also wanted to show I wasn't scared of cash, so I just got a ton of cash.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 You're totally not scared.

Speaker 7 Exposure

Speaker 7 to cash. Yeah.
Well, it was cool when it was in the shrink wrap, but now that it's out, it's kind of a little

Speaker 1 bit a bunch of ones.

Speaker 6 You didn't take that on the train, though. You waited until you got close to the office.

Speaker 1 Exactly. Yeah.
We're baby steps.

Speaker 3 Do you want to throw up a stack?

Speaker 1 Oh, then Billy's going to have to clean it. I'm not trying to.
He wants us money.

Speaker 1 I don't want to be a jerk to him. All right, there you go.
Just one of them. Just one of them.

Speaker 3 Okay, that was cool. Yeah, that was pretty cool.
That was cool.

Speaker 1 Yeah, let's do it on a Mac.

Speaker 1 I want to put all this money on Max to make the cut. Perfect.
Let's do it. Let's do it.
So you need the cash back. Yes.
Okay.

Speaker 7 The lady's going to be so angry at me when I bring it back.

Speaker 1 That's perfect. Yeah.
Take all the cash back.

Speaker 1 I told the lady. Are you worried about taking the cash back?

Speaker 7 Yes. I told the lady at the window that I was filming a music video, and that's why I didn't know.

Speaker 1 So just bring it back and be like, music video went well. Yeah, music video over.

Speaker 6 We could keep the 50 because that's the profit. Yeah.

Speaker 6 Then we're just reinvesting the initial 50 right there.

Speaker 1 That's 100. That's 100.
I threw 100. Yeah.
All right, so yeah. We can keep that.
That could be like a slush fund for coffee. Sweet.
And then we'll reinvest the rest.

Speaker 3 I'm just, I'm very proud of Billy because when you first started talking about this spreadsheet, it sounded like the biggest bunch of horseshit I'd ever heard in my life. And somehow it worked out.

Speaker 3 And I'm proud of your brain, Billy. Thank you.

Speaker 7 Really, Really, the two actual gambling decisions where I had to put a risk was that St. Peter's wouldn't win the whole thing and that Duke Orgonzaga wouldn't go the whole way.

Speaker 3 That was really the two.

Speaker 1 Now, did you have fun? Or was it stressful? It seemed like it was way more stressful than fun.

Speaker 7 It was very stressful.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 7 But I had time.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 7 So.

Speaker 1 But it did seem at points it was like this is

Speaker 7 I was I'd be sitting in front of an Excel spreadsheet for just hours

Speaker 1 randomly $50.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you got it.

Speaker 1 You should, your one last assignment for this besides putting this all in maxoma to make the cut is you should actually try to figure out how much time you actually spent on this so we could figure out what you got paid hourly to do this.

Speaker 7 It's probably somewhere around,

Speaker 7 I'm going to say $5 an hour.

Speaker 3 Okay.

Speaker 3 Well, this is also like a lot of times they always like to tell you on the news, like, this is the time of year where more wages are stolen from employers than any other month because everyone's paying attention to basketball.

Speaker 3 You're actually like making more money by doing less real work for the company by doing this.

Speaker 3 So we appreciate your efforts, Billy.

Speaker 7 A couple double negatives in there, but

Speaker 3 no, you did it.

Speaker 1 Sweet. Thank you.

Speaker 1 Jake, your thoughts from press row, I saw you talk to Bill Self afterwards. Yeah, I got denied

Speaker 1 first. It was great.

Speaker 1 His hair looked real? It was fine, yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 1 From what I saw. Okay.
So tell us, yeah, you got denied and then you went, you stayed

Speaker 1 persistent.

Speaker 5 Found them. Yeah, don't give up, boys and girls.

Speaker 1 So you were walking around

Speaker 1 right after the game on the floor.

Speaker 5 Yeah, I was on the floor with the confetti and everything.

Speaker 1 Did you turn your ankle? No. Okay, did you notice any floorboards loose? No.

Speaker 5 Okay. So we're clear.
Yeah, I got some cool interviews. I got Bill Self.
I got Mitch Lightfoot, who's a, I think he's a barcelo athlete, but he's a Stule Regardless. Yep.

Speaker 1 Paul Pierce pre-game.

Speaker 5 Yep. That was cool.
CKU by 15. And they were down 15 and a half.

Speaker 1 Covering your first Final Four. Was it everything you wanted it to be in more?

Speaker 5 It was awesome. Yeah.
It was really cool.

Speaker 5 It's kind of tough because I feel like I don't know how a Final Four could be better than that with the storylines and everything.

Speaker 5 Like the only way I feel like a Final Four experience can be better is like, A, if one of my teams are in it and wins it, or B, if I'm calling it one day.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 5 Like, I don't know how else it could get better.

Speaker 3 You will. Yeah.
You'll call it one day, Jay. Hopefully.
So, what about one Shiny Marshman? What about your list of

Speaker 3 things?

Speaker 5 I just watched it through again. We're around 50% again.

Speaker 1 Okay, that's pretty good. Yeah, not as good as Billy.

Speaker 1 He's

Speaker 6 sounds like you were slightly below 50%.

Speaker 1 Oh, Billy was slightly above. Were you slightly below 50%? I have to do the exact calculations, but where would you say, honest opinion, where you think you land? This is what we'll take:

Speaker 5 47.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 And Billy, our Billy was what, 50.5%?

Speaker 1 I think 50.25.

Speaker 7 50.5% growth.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Which over time, if you Billy, you're a new host of Benchmob. Oh,

Speaker 5 could use a break from the other two anyway.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 7 Honestly, I'd come on that show. Yeah, no, no, no.

Speaker 3 That was very smart of you, Jake.

Speaker 3 You absolutely, that worked just as you planned to be like, hey, that's the old Tom Sawyer. Like, oh, I'll let you wash this fence if you want to.

Speaker 3 He was like, sure. Enjoy it.
Very smart.

Speaker 1 All right. Yeah.
Great trip to New Orleans. New Orleans is, I mean, we said it, I think, on Sunday, but when you're in New Orleans for four days, it feels like 400.

Speaker 1 I think we all were limping this morning. It was one of those things where we came back and no one was saying anything all morning because we were just all dead.

Speaker 1 Yeah, take a couple days to recover. I don't know.
It was a great trip. New Orleans is a great city to be in.
Great, great people, great food, great drinks. It just takes a lot out of you.

Speaker 6 It's obviously a bigger sporting event, the Super Bowl, but I think the Final Four is borderline a funner.

Speaker 1 Because it really is what Steve said.

Speaker 1 It's the Sunday that you have that you like you get basically to drink all day saturday and then you get a sunday to come and like explore a city have fun see friends all that stuff i also like multiple teams being in the same city you've got the different fans from all over the country that get involved as opposed to super bowl where it's just like it's either you're a celebrity or you're a fan of one or two of the teams yeah no it's it's i love the final four i'll go to the final four every year I actually also have like had a little moment where I was like, final four feels like the most father-son event that happens in the sports calendar.

Speaker 1 So I might, that might be.

Speaker 5 I don't have a tradition. Not the Final Four.
We would go to a first-round tournament site for like 15 straight years.

Speaker 1 Yeah, because you do see a lot of that. You see a lot of

Speaker 1 families walking around, which is kind of nice because, I don't know, it's just nice.

Speaker 3 Star Roy Williams in the casino.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he was there all, like the whole weekend.

Speaker 3 Sneaky for a guy that doesn't cuss ever. He spends like 99% of his life at a craps table.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 3 He loves gambling. He was everywhere this weekend.

Speaker 6 There was also rumors about the honey badger being there at like 8 a.m. in the morning, and then I saw today that he's visiting with the Saints.
So it's good that the timing worked out for him there.

Speaker 1 That was perfect timing for him. And thank you to Mincy, the king of the South, for being a great host all weekend long.

Speaker 6 He changed the video game. He did.
Forever.

Speaker 1 Forever. Forever.
He was stop motion, you said?

Speaker 6 He did a video at the game after the game was over.

Speaker 6 That looked like it was shot in two frames per second.

Speaker 1 It's art. It's truly art.

Speaker 3 Like the nightmare before Christmas mixed with an aha video.

Speaker 1 It was perfect. I don't know who makes these videos for him, but they're...

Speaker 5 Fifth most watched Final Four game, by the way.

Speaker 1 Fifth.

Speaker 1 Wow.

Speaker 5 The only one was Wisconsin, Kentucky. Oh, wow.

Speaker 3 So wait, so that's in the modern era, though.

Speaker 1 So that means we liked the game. We enjoyed the game.

Speaker 3 Yeah, we enjoyed it slightly less than when

Speaker 1 Wisconsin was on CBS.

Speaker 5 It probably would have been.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yes, yes. All right, let's do hot seat cool throw.
And then we got Max Homa on the the show to preview the Masters.

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Speaker 6 Okay, Hank. My hot seat is anyone that's traveling in the Manchester airport today in London.
I don't know if it's still like this today.

Speaker 3 It's South London. Manchester is just like south of town.

Speaker 1 Okay. You just got corrected.

Speaker 6 Did I say it was North London?

Speaker 3 No, you said it wasn't. No, I was establishing a baseline of facts because there will be some listeners out there that will be like, whoa, Hank just said that Manchester is in London.

Speaker 3 And they're going to get mad. So I have to correct him and be like, yeah, he knows that it's in South London, but you don't have to get mad at Hank for saying that.

Speaker 7 He's basically saying that you called Jersey City New York City.

Speaker 6 Which is basically the same thing. Right.

Speaker 6 There's videos, like it's a horror show. There's the security line, if you pulled up to the terminal where you get cabs, like the security line is out the door, like around the corner.

Speaker 6 There's everyone, people are just leaving bags because the baggage claims taking too long. What happened? I don't know.

Speaker 6 It's just, I don't know the reason for it, but I saw a Twitter thread, and it looks quite literally like I am legend when they're trying to leave the city.

Speaker 3 So apparently it's been a bad couple weeks, and the manager.

Speaker 1 People just quit?

Speaker 3 Yeah, the entire manager of the airport just quit.

Speaker 1 Oh man.

Speaker 1 That's what it looked like.

Speaker 6 It looked like there was a strike or there was something where like

Speaker 6 they were expecting 100 workers and 10 showed up.

Speaker 1 Okay, I'm looking at it right now. Yeah, this seems like a very, very, very bad scene.
Okay. Yeah, there's not, I mean,

Speaker 1 this is

Speaker 1 all the all the car, all the

Speaker 1 bins for the TSA stacked up on top of each other.

Speaker 1 There's no worse feeling than showing up to an airport and seeing that it's like a cluster fuck day and just being like, I don't know how I'm going to get out of here. What would you do?

Speaker 1 I would probably just go. I would leave.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I have.

Speaker 6 But if you had to be somewhere the next day.

Speaker 1 Oh, I have TSA pre-check and clear, so I'd be fine.

Speaker 3 I've left a baggage claim before, and it's just taking too long. And I've been like, okay, I'll come back and pick this up later.
But

Speaker 3 there's no more stressful place to be.

Speaker 3 if you're already running late for something than at a busy airport after you land you just want to be teleported back home at that point This would drive me nuts.

Speaker 1 Okay, good hot seat.

Speaker 6 Also, I almost missed our plane on the way there. That was, I guess, people, no, we might have talked about it in a drunk episode.
My cool throne is our YouTube channel. Okay.

Speaker 6 People have been asking this for a long time. We've started uploading the YouTube video of this podcast in the morning.
So

Speaker 6 you can listen to it, you can watch it. We've given people the option.

Speaker 6 Shout out to Liam and Evan memes behind the scenes, but we haven't talked about it on the show, and I feel like

Speaker 6 we should get it out there, get people on the YouTube channel watching the videos.

Speaker 1 Yes, Monday was a perfect example. A video you had, or a podcast you had to watch to see Hank's dead face.

Speaker 6 That's true.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it was great. I mean, it was a great visual.

Speaker 3 You have to admit, Hank, that like this, the slow zoom-ins on your face were awesome. Where you were doing the Stephen A.
Smith pain meme.

Speaker 3 The picture was saying a thousand words at that point.

Speaker 1 And Bubba being drunk himself trying to find me with the camera when he was like 12 feet away was so

Speaker 1 I like that we do it when we do a podcast drunk, everyone's drunk. It's not like, oh, behind the scenes is sober, and the guys in front of the camera are drunk.
No, no, no, we're all hammered.

Speaker 6 Someone said that he couldn't find you because you were blending in with the other colors on the walls that he also couldn't see.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's facts.

Speaker 1 So good. Yeah, go watch it.
Go subscribe to the YouTube channel, please. Okay, PFT, your hot seat, cool throne.

Speaker 3 My hot seat is not having your free speech controlled online by egomanical billionaires at Twitter because that's a light one for today Elon Musk is coming to save it yep so he's coming to save the day so uh Elon Musk is buying like nine percent of Twitter right now and they're giving him a seat on the board I think he's just got so much money that he can literally buy anything I don't think that there's anything that he could not buy yeah why not if he didn't if he didn't want to so I think he's just like thinking about stuff in his day-to-day life that he uses and he just wants to buy everything that he uses.

Speaker 3 Yes. Stay like sun up to sundown.
So I think he's just going to make it easier for trolls online. I think he likes trolls.
He likes memes. He likes trolls.
I think this is good for us.

Speaker 1 I saw a couple people being like, I am now going to deactivate my Twitter account for at least a week to protest. There we go.
That will show them.

Speaker 3 Yeah, no, I think it's good news for those of us that like to use Twitter to fuck around a lot. Yeah.
So, yeah, happy to see old Elon getting on board.

Speaker 3 My cool throne is baseball because baseball really snuck up on us. Yep.
But it's back. Thursday is opening day.
Tomorrow is opening day in baseball.

Speaker 3 Very excited to pay attention for the first couple weeks of the season. The Seam Head Express is coming back this year.
People have been asking about that. I'm defending my second-place crown.

Speaker 3 And I'm just, I don't know.

Speaker 1 I feel like I say this every spring, but like,

Speaker 3 I'm excited for baseball season this year.

Speaker 1 Yeah. I am.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Why not? Are you? Yeah, sure. I mean, I'm not.
A little bit.

Speaker 1 I get excited for baseball when it comes around and then you know usually it's like baseball starts for a week i'm pumped then i'm gonna watch hockey and basketball playoffs and then i'll come back to baseball i think i'm excited because it got taken away from us for like a week Yeah, I didn't really, that never really

Speaker 3 hurt me. Was this like a big plan by Manfred to be like, we're going to make the fans think that they're not going to get a season, and then they'll be so grateful.

Speaker 1 So happy. Yeah.
Yeah. No,

Speaker 1 I love, you know, opening day. I love when baseball does come back.
But yeah, that's usually the rhythm of like my watching is baseball comes back pumped,

Speaker 1 then the playoffs start. And it's like, okay, let's watch the playoffs because those are kind of important.
And then baseball comes back around June. It's like, yeah, let's do it.
Let's hop right in.

Speaker 1 All right, my hot seat is Andy Dalton being a nice guy because he signed with the Saints and Blake Portals then asked to be cut. because there was not enough room for Blake Portals.

Speaker 1 So I'm starting to rethink this whole Andy Dalton thing.

Speaker 3 Well, Blake was like, there's not enough room for two nice guys in this locker room. Yeah.

Speaker 3 But that just means that Blake's betting on himself.

Speaker 1 I hope he gets, yeah, hopefully someone will sign Blake. Let's keep him in the league.

Speaker 3 Is there a spring game coming up for any like Big Ten school?

Speaker 1 I know Clemson's got theirs on Saturday.

Speaker 3 They should have Blake throw at halftime like Michigan did with Kaepernick. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Blake should be on a roster, but Andy Dalton, what the fuck, dude? Kind of a dickhead move. Kind of a dickhead move.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 And then my cool throne is Billy because we're back with Billy and he didn't do anything in New Orleans to make us mad at him. So good job, Billy.

Speaker 1 Thanks, guys. Yeah, you did.
You didn't. Hogs for the cause, you didn't do anything.
Final four, you didn't do anything.

Speaker 7 Did you guys see the Burmese pythons on

Speaker 1 Bourbon Street? We did.

Speaker 1 Was you taking pictures of those? Was that the part you were going to?

Speaker 7 Look, I had a lot of FOMO. That's why I left the group text.
I didn't want to.

Speaker 1 I actually was totally cool with that move. Like, I thought that was a...
It wasn't...

Speaker 7 I wasn't trying to...

Speaker 7 I hope you guys understood. It was just like FOMO.

Speaker 1 No, you left the group text, and I was like, that makes sense. Like, why would you want to be on a group text where we're just planning things and you're not there?

Speaker 7 Quick question. Can I get added back now for you?

Speaker 1 You already did. You got batted back this morning.
Oh, I did? Yeah. Yeah.
Someone added you back this morning.

Speaker 7 I think I have to opt back.

Speaker 1 I'll figure that out. But you did a great job in New Orleans.
Perfect.

Speaker 3 But yeah, thanks. I did not get any pictures of the Burmese Pythons.
I think they were in the background of a video that I was in at at one point.

Speaker 7 I mean, the fact, like, you guys kind of wasted your whole trip if you also did not get a picture with those pythons.

Speaker 1 They were big. They're very big.
That's the point.

Speaker 7 They're well trained.

Speaker 1 I love that about you so much that we like went to the Duke UNC and all this stuff. You're like, but dude, did you see those Burmese pythons? Would you have let one of them strangle you?

Speaker 7 Well, they only strangle you if you like give off fear. Right.

Speaker 1 So if I was holding a wad of cash in front of you and I had the Burmese Python around your neck, would you...

Speaker 7 I'm working on the cash fear.

Speaker 7 I think we made huge steps in back.

Speaker 1 Big steps in immersion theory. Agreed.
Agreed. All right, Billy, you're a hot seat, Quill Thrones.
Welcome back.

Speaker 7 My hot seat

Speaker 7 is, I missed you guys too, is

Speaker 7 plane travelers.

Speaker 7 We had that.

Speaker 1 Manchester?

Speaker 7 No, no. We had that time after the pandemic where everyone's getting kicked off of planes because no one knew how to act in public.
We once again have one of those stories. They're kind of back.

Speaker 7 A guy got kicked off of an airplane for jerking off four times and after the fourth they landed the plane.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 3 Like two is okay.

Speaker 3 Three you're pushing your luck. Four, it's like we got to get everybody out.
We got to bring the hazmat team on to hose it down.

Speaker 1 How long was this flight? I need do you have the airline and the where it was going?

Speaker 7 I think it was on Spirit. Okay.
It was coming from Florida on the way back from Florida.

Speaker 1 Wait, you said

Speaker 1 wait, say that again?

Speaker 3 It was just flying around Florida.

Speaker 1 Yeah. That actually makes it

Speaker 1 coming from Florida to

Speaker 7 somewhere somewhere up north.

Speaker 1 Oh, okay.

Speaker 7 Wisconsin or Minnesota.

Speaker 1 Spirit, though,

Speaker 1 you can jerk off on Spirit. Right.
You can absolutely jerk off on Spirit.

Speaker 1 This guy has a completely reasonable case in court being like, you sold me a $29 ticket. I was going to jerk off.
And they'd be like, well, yeah, you're right. You know what? That's fair.

Speaker 3 The way that Spirit operates, I think it's a $29 ticket, and then there's a $60 surcharge if you want to pay to sit and then not getting jacked off on a section.

Speaker 1 Right. So

Speaker 1 I stand with this guy.

Speaker 1 I do.

Speaker 1 Spirit is the airline that if you take, you're basically saying, I'm like,

Speaker 1 I don't want to spend any money and I'm willing to just be like tortured for three hours to get to my destination. Also, including a guy jerking off next to you.

Speaker 3 Also, let's give the guy some credit here just from a medical standpoint. To be able to do it four times on what I assume would be like a three and a half hour flight, that's some impressive numbers.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that is. That's tough to pull off.
It's kind of showing off.

Speaker 7 Correction, it was Southwest.

Speaker 1 Oh, okay.

Speaker 7 Seattle to Phoenix.

Speaker 1 Okay, changes everything.

Speaker 1 Put them in jail.

Speaker 7 My Cool Throne is a little bit more.

Speaker 1 You didn't have any part of that, right?

Speaker 1 Well, it was.

Speaker 3 I think you were just assuming, and naturally, what you assumed would be what I would assume, too, that it would somehow involve Florida and Spirit or Allegion Airlines.

Speaker 7 That was at the end of my hot seat list. My Cool Throne is St.
Peter's University. So I went there on Friday to see their Elite Eight appearance parade.

Speaker 7 And it was really awesome to see the Jersey City really embrace them. I mean, Jersey City really, as we spoke about earlier, is in the shadow of New York City.

Speaker 7 Don't really, you know, gets much shine much. St.
Peter's really brought a spotlight to that community, and they celebrated their Elite Eight appearance with a parade.

Speaker 7 And that probably is the lowest official finishing parade, you think? Like fifth to eighth place, at least.

Speaker 7 I know like Atlanta had a second place finish, and Cleveland had a last-place 0-16.

Speaker 1 Yeah, they did have that.

Speaker 7 But it wasn't official by the city.

Speaker 3 That was it for charity, too, I think.

Speaker 1 Right. I'm totally fine.

Speaker 6 He makes a historic run. Yeah.
Like, if you're a first time ever

Speaker 1 15-seed gets the Elite Eight, that's a parade.

Speaker 3 I think they deserve a banner there. They deserve to remember this run for a long time.
Yeah.

Speaker 3 Do you think UNC hangs up a banner?

Speaker 1 Probably not.

Speaker 7 And also.

Speaker 1 It would be cool, though. I'm for it.

Speaker 7 Doug Eddard and a couple of the other players have gone to the portal recently to transfer out of St. Peter's.

Speaker 7 But honestly, from how I saw the school embracing the team and hearing the mayor as well as the president of the school, athletic director.

Speaker 1 Do you want to join the team? No.

Speaker 7 But I actually think they have a chance to become like one of these small school powerhouses that ends up going like a Gonzaga.

Speaker 1 Like, seriously.

Speaker 7 Like, just like they'll make runs, but I don't know what to do.

Speaker 3 You know what they need, like, so the difference between St. Peter's and Gonzaga is that Gonzaga has had

Speaker 3 millions and millions and millions of more dollars in funding going back like 40 years.

Speaker 6 And also they don't practice on like a pool.

Speaker 7 Right, but now that the school has gotten, it has had such an increase in enrollment and increase. There's just a bunch of stuff that you can do.
You send their speech to the bottom.

Speaker 1 Do you think it does?

Speaker 3 Do you think, though, as a college basketball analyst that

Speaker 3 it's not a good sign for after their first elite eight that their best players are now leaving the school? Like in terms of things to build

Speaker 1 things to build on.

Speaker 7 But you know what? It was just good vibes.

Speaker 1 I'm not an answer.

Speaker 7 Yeah, it was

Speaker 7 the school's like really the student body and sort of all the super fans there. Like, it was

Speaker 7 interesting. Got some video.
We'll probably be coming out some point in some mode. So, there we go, Beautiful.

Speaker 1 Good time. I like that.
Some visuals keep it as vague as possible. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I know he's going to school scenes or it'll be in the future. Some point in

Speaker 1 some way. Yeah.
Sweet. Might come out as a podcast.

Speaker 7 Shout out, Peacocks.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 All right, Jake.

Speaker 5 My hot seat is sign stealing. They approve technology for pitchers and catchers to use some devices so that they don't have to do the numbers.

Speaker 1 Oh.

Speaker 3 Oh, is this getting out ahead of the Yankee letter that's going to be released?

Speaker 1 It's like

Speaker 3 now it's legal.

Speaker 5 I disavow that, by the way. The Yankees?

Speaker 5 Any form of cheating.

Speaker 3 What happens if the Yankees were on the cutting edge of cheating, like twice as bad as the Astros?

Speaker 1 Will they be the best cheaters? I don't know. Then you have to support it.
Confirm the cheat.

Speaker 5 I won't support that. There's no spin zone for that.

Speaker 1 Like a microchip? Nice. No, I think it's like a

Speaker 1 what is it? It's probably the they probably just took the Astros technology and then used it for this. Yeah.
Where it like buzzes your wrist or something. Yeah, I think it's something on the wrist.

Speaker 3 But it's for the pitchers and the catchers and the pitching coach or the manager to communicate.

Speaker 1 It's like Frank Abbott.

Speaker 1 Catch me if you can when they hire him because he knows all the loopholes. They just had Jose El Tuve and Alex Bregman sit with Rob Manford and be like, how did you do this?

Speaker 3 No, it's yeah, trying to figure out how to get around it. So it's like a buzzing.

Speaker 5 It's a pad with buttons on the wrist of the gloved hand.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's pretty much what it is.

Speaker 5 You can just type in location directly to the picture through a listening device.

Speaker 3 Okay. That's so weird.
That is crazy. Are they going to have the green dot on their hats?

Speaker 1 Mic'd up. I don't know.

Speaker 5 It should be interesting. My cool throne is menus.
It's a big week for menus. Two at the masters.
Oh, yeah. We've got the OG menu, which is just just showing how cheap everything is, which is awesome.

Speaker 5 And then, have you guys seen Hideki Matsuyama's Champions Dinner menu?

Speaker 1 Looks really good. Elite, ready?

Speaker 1 I'm done with food, though, but it looks good.

Speaker 5 But it looks really good. Appetizers, sushi,

Speaker 5 sashimi, yakutori chicken skewers.

Speaker 5 The mains, miso glazed black cod, an A5 wagu beef ribeye. Okay.
And then the dessert is Japanese strawberry shortcake.

Speaker 3 That sounds amazing. That's like a perfect meal.

Speaker 5 Yeah, unbelievable. And then obviously the pimento cheese.
I've never had that, but $1.50,

Speaker 5 everything is under... The most expensive thing is $6, the white wine, Chardonnay.

Speaker 5 Everything else is cheaper.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I'm done with food, but it does sound delicious. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 I do love looking at the Masters prices and just being like, ooh, I'd be able to eat everything for $25.

Speaker 3 I saw something online that said that they were starting to modernize the Masters a little bit, where I don't know if they're allowing cell phones this year.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it was Dude Perfect.

Speaker 3 But yeah, Dude Perfect is modernized. Yeah, they're the breaking point of this entire thing.
But at some point in the future, they are going to allow cell phones.

Speaker 1 I hope they never do that. No, I hope.

Speaker 3 I hope they go harder against cell phones. I hope they actually have their own security staff arrest people that try to break the cell phone rule.
Yes. I like Augusta as it is.

Speaker 1 I hope, yeah, they don't even let you use a cell phone the week before and after.

Speaker 3 Yeah, they have one of those electromagnetic pulses that goes off that just fries all your electronics.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I agree. Keep the masters, the masters.

Speaker 1 All right, let's get to our interview. Speaking of with Max Homa, who's getting ready for Augusta.
Before we do that, PFT, you had a quick word from one of our sponsors. Give it up for Chicago.

Speaker 9 Sebastian Maniscalco's new stand-up special, It Ain't Right, is coming to Hulu on November 21st.

Speaker 1 30 years ago, Jeff Bezos, complete nerd. Bezos now ripped to shreds on his super yacht, and the boxes keep

Speaker 1 coming.

Speaker 9 Sebastian Maniscalco, Maniscalco, It Ain't Right. Premieres November 21st, streaming on Hulu and Hulu on Disney Plus for bundle subscribers.
Terms apply.

Speaker 1 Okay, we now welcome on our very good friend and soon-to-be

Speaker 1 member of a Masters Making the Cut group. It is Max Homa.
He's getting ready for the Masters.

Speaker 1 We're going to air this right before the Masters start. So

Speaker 1 let's just do a little quick, like, how we're feeling,

Speaker 1 how everything's coming together. Can you really bounce off of this, you know, Fortnite open victory and propel yourself to be someone who actually plays on Saturday and Sunday at Augusta?

Speaker 10 I mean, absolutely.

Speaker 10 You know, I've been,

Speaker 10 the only thing that's made me nervous, golf game can't possibly feel better.

Speaker 10 The only thing that's made me nervous is for the first time in my life, I've kind of laid my nuts on the table and said, I'm going to do something.

Speaker 10 That's getting me a little, honestly. This is, I don't know if it's quite up to there, up there with a pinky bet rush, but this is quite the rush.

Speaker 1 Now, did you say you were going to make the cut before I just pretended that you said you were going to make the cut? Did I do that to you?

Speaker 10 No, I texted you that I was 100% making this cut.

Speaker 1 That's right. Okay.
All right. Yeah, and then I just said it out loud.
I said it out loud and put the pressure on it.

Speaker 10 You have a lot more of a following. And then you honestly have a lot angrier fans than I do.
So they're into it right now.

Speaker 3 So what's the stakes here? Yeah, I don't think you can just say like your nuts are on the line unless

Speaker 1 embarrassment. Yeah.

Speaker 10 It could be my life because I think your AWLs might come after me like physically if I don't do this. I have to go play laser tag with Natalie's husband's kid.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I think you should have to do that. If you don't make the cut, you should have to go.
Where was that? Like North Carolina or something?

Speaker 10 That's too far. I could probably make that happen.

Speaker 1 I think that would be a very funny visual. If you don't make the cut at Augusta

Speaker 1 on Sunday, we get a picture of you playing laser tags with a bunch of seven-year-olds you'd never met in your life, and that will give you like a humbling moment where it's like, hey, do you know how you can avoid this?

Speaker 1 Being better at golf, Max.

Speaker 10 Being better at golf. I think that's that's a that's a fair point.
Those kids will not know it's coming, though. There's gonna be a lot of aggression on that Saturday morning.

Speaker 1 Honestly, that sounds like a lot of fun.

Speaker 3 Playing laser tag with you're like, uh, you're like, what's his name? Uh, Billy Madison when he's playing dodgeball, just lighting kids up.

Speaker 1 They'll feel the wrath.

Speaker 3 I did like your take, though, that we we as adults don't play Laser Tag enough. I agree wholeheartedly.
LaserTag is

Speaker 1 a great time.

Speaker 10 I feel like we can just kind of keep that afloat a little bit better.

Speaker 1 Yeah, mash rooms?

Speaker 3 No, Laser Tag. So the new escape rooms that they have, I'm pretty sure that they're only used for corporate retreats.

Speaker 3 You know those days where you still have to go to work, but they're like, we're doing a fun little wacky off-site thing today.

Speaker 3 We're going to go hang out in a small room together and try to solve puzzles and pretend like we're not annoying.

Speaker 10 LaserTag not a better way to build

Speaker 10 your work vibe and your team vibe. Like, that feels way better than an escape room.

Speaker 3 Yeah, you solve your problems with aggression.

Speaker 1 I'll just say it. I think paintball is far superior to laser tag.

Speaker 1 I know that paintball probably can't be played by seven-year-olds, but my problem with laser tag was always like the lasers, half the lasers don't work, and then you're just stuck.

Speaker 1 I feel like they never updated the technology. Maybe I'm wrong.
I haven't been in a laser tag place in like 10 years, maybe longer.

Speaker 1 Remember when it first came out, and it was like, holy fuck, this is next level stuff. And it's like they hadn't fully figured out how to use the technology.

Speaker 1 So you're walking around with like an 80-pound pack, and the lasers don't even like shoot right. But they probably have fixed it.

Speaker 10 Think about that, that what you just said, you said that the technology wasn't great, essentially. And this has been 10, 15 years later.
And think of how good technology is.

Speaker 10 I mean, Jeff Bezos went to the moon.

Speaker 10 So, like,

Speaker 10 what if we incorporated new technology?

Speaker 10 It could be tremendous.

Speaker 1 I'm down with that. I'm down with that.
If we use our money instead of sending Jeff Bezos to play just the tip with the atmosphere to laser tag technology, I'm cool with that.

Speaker 3 I think it's more impressive to say, like, Jeff Bezos, technology has gotten so good that Jeff Bezos got laid.

Speaker 3 That's like more impressive than like going into the atmosphere and then coming back in a parachute.

Speaker 10 That's pretty good technology.

Speaker 3 It is.

Speaker 3 and as far as the the laser tag situation goes i think it's like did you well did you read the story that came out about jim harbaugh and going to play laser tag oh yeah so harbaugh is so competitive about laser tag that uh he was setting all the high records he was like doing the high scores for his entire party and his group and they were trying to figure out how he was dominating people so bad and it turns out he was just following the worst kid around and just standing next to him and letting his battery recharge and then killing him immediately.

Speaker 3 I respect the hell out of Harbaugh for doing that.

Speaker 10 I I respect, and I'm not surprised. After listening to his interviews on here and reading some stories about him, that makes a lot of sense.
I would have thought maybe he'd be a little bit more of a

Speaker 10 competitor and want to kind of pick on the best player, but

Speaker 10 I respect the grind regardless.

Speaker 3 Well, that's the Michigan Way. It's pretty much like scheduling the Little Sisters the Poor back in 1901.
Yes. And you win a national champion.

Speaker 1 You're the Destroyer YMCA. They teach him how to play football, then they beat him.

Speaker 3 Max, I'm wearing the Italian soccer jersey in your honor today. I wanted to get your feedback on your team.
I guess the big news is you guys won the Euros, right? Congratulations.

Speaker 1 European champions.

Speaker 10 I've watched so much of it. That one guy up at the front of the pitch, as we say, or the pitch in Italian.

Speaker 10 Yeah, he was really good. He was dominant.
A lot of passion. Carbo loaded, obviously, on pasta before from what the team told me.
And yeah, I got the job done.

Speaker 3 Congratulations. Yeah.
What a team.

Speaker 3 So you have guaranteed that you're going to make the cut at the Masters. Congratulations in advance for that.
Thank you.

Speaker 3 I'm curious because we're, you know, we kind of parachute in once a year to Augusta, and we, you know, we talk about the azaleas, the fake bird sounds that they put in, the spray-painted grass, all the stuff that we love about the masters.

Speaker 3 I'm curious from a guy that has played there, what is your favorite hole?

Speaker 10 Oh, my favorite hole.

Speaker 10 The 13th hole, because that's where all the azaleas are on the left, and that's pretty awesome.

Speaker 10 But,

Speaker 10 I mean, Augusta's pretty, it's pretty, as far as the golf course goes, it's pretty amazing.

Speaker 10 Just as far as like,

Speaker 10 it's probably the only tournament you don't ever, golf course you never have to go to, and you feel like you know every

Speaker 10 hole. So that's pretty cool.

Speaker 10 But when you get in, it's kind of sad. You get to play the coolest golf course in, you know, the country at the very least.
And I don't, I don't like get to sit there and appreciate it.

Speaker 10 But my buddy Taylor and I went three weeks ago.

Speaker 10 They did not track my flight there like they did Tiger Woods' yesterday, but or last week, I guess, because we're in the time machine.

Speaker 10 But we went and it was cool to just go there and like, I actually had a drink and

Speaker 10 like got to enjoy where I was.

Speaker 10 And I came, I left there thinking, you know, pretty lucky I get to come out to this golf course in three weeks and make the cut here and see what it looks like on a Sunday of the golf tournament.

Speaker 1 Cause I practiced.

Speaker 10 I practiced playing the weekend of my practice round was Saturday and a Sunday, which was, I think that's good practice. It's like kind of manifesting what will happen here in due time.

Speaker 1 I like that. I like that.
So, wait, just

Speaker 1 from a noob side, like PFT said, we parachute in Augusta. How many times do you actually get to practice? Like, when will you go to Augusta?

Speaker 1 And how many times you get to actually practice before you have to play in it? Like, is there enough time to figure some things out?

Speaker 1 Or is it just, all right, we're showing up to Augusta every year and we're just hoping that we do well?

Speaker 10 They, I think they give us, once you qualify, I think they give you like five rounds to go up there and check it out on your own It's just not very similar to when you actually play the tournament.

Speaker 10 They make it so much more difficult But then once I'll get there Saturday

Speaker 10 of the tournament or the week prior to the tournament. So I'll practice Sunday out there Monday Tuesday and a bit on Wednesday.
So you kind of get to get a pretty good feel.

Speaker 10 It's just like any other tournament in a way with the practice. It's just a lot more important.

Speaker 10 So it is tough. It's a really hard golf course.
So like learning it fast is hard. I've played one, the one that was in November, and the golf course is nothing like what it is in April.

Speaker 10 So that was kind of, that's my excuse for why I missed the cut in both November and April because the November one, I was used to watching it on TV, obviously.

Speaker 10 And I thought, you know, that didn't seem fair. I didn't, you know, I didn't have any knowledge.
And then the April one, I was tricked by the November one. So this year, second April one, I feel like

Speaker 10 I just, I know all the things now.

Speaker 1 How like serious are the practice rounds when you do it? Like, how does it work? Do you go out with someone else?

Speaker 1 You obviously are with your caddy, but like, if you go, you know, you're on the 12th hole and you, you hit one in the water, do you like, say, like, mulligan, then rip a bowl and then get back right at it?

Speaker 1 Like, how does that work?

Speaker 10 You actually nailed that. Yeah.
The bowls are flying around, flying around, Augusta.

Speaker 10 No, it's pretty, I mean, it's, it's obviously pretty serious, but I play with the same crew mostly.

Speaker 10 The only difference is we usually have a pro-am on Wednesdays, so we have to play with you know a bunch of ceos and and people who are successful for their brains and uh and and actual like real success and not just hitting a golf ball round so we do that every wednesday but at uh the majors and obviously at the masters we do not so we get a lot more time on the golf course so you end up playing um you know you get to play a little bit uh more loose with like only playing nine holes uh but i play with this similar crew i'm i'm hoping uh to play with Tiger Woods and a Prax round this year.

Speaker 10 That is that is my second most important goal of the week.

Speaker 1 How would that work? You just gonna text him, be like, hey, dude, you want, can I play with you?

Speaker 10 I, I, I heard through the grapevine that last year, obviously, he ended up not playing, but after I won the golf tournament, he uh is the host of, that, um, his, you know, good friend Fred Couples, who is my buddy, said like later, like kind of teased me later.

Speaker 10 He's like, oh, yeah, we were all going to play a prax round together. And obviously, you know, Tiger can't play this year.
And I was like, well, that's news to me and

Speaker 10 even more kind of devastating.

Speaker 1 Wow.

Speaker 10 So I'm hoping I get that this year. But I mean, it's very serious the prep.
But like I said, we do it every week, oddly enough. So it's actually, it just becomes kind of

Speaker 10 second nature.

Speaker 3 How cool was it the first time that Tiger Woods came up to you and was like, hey, Max, how's it going?

Speaker 1 Like that he knew.

Speaker 10 It was like pretty frightening, honestly, because I just didn't, I didn't know what to say or do. I actually have a video of it without the sound, but somebody randomly got a video of it.

Speaker 10 My caddy Joe was like, hey, Max, you need to turn around right now. And I'm like, I was warming up for a tournament.
And I was like, what are you talking about?

Speaker 10 And I turned around and you just see like our God like beelining at me. And I'm thinking, like, what could he possibly be coming over here to do?

Speaker 10 And fortunately, he did not, you know, do anything weird. It was just he was being super nice and congratulating me on a tournament a few, a month prior.
So yeah, it's different.

Speaker 10 Tiger, I don't know, man.

Speaker 10 I always kind of get made fun of for geeking out about Tiger, but it's just one of those things, like watching somebody since I was six years old, like dominate the sport I love.

Speaker 10 It's hard not to get kind of,

Speaker 10 I don't know, kind of nerd out about it. Cause it's weird.
I feel like.

Speaker 10 It must be like what the kids, you know, felt like playing against Michael Jordan or something, like when they got to the league.

Speaker 10 It's just, it's hard to comprehend and golf's easier because we play it so much longer.

Speaker 10 We have the opportunity.

Speaker 1 There are certain celebrities that even if you like, you know, do something like you're a professional golfer. We interview athletes all all the time.

Speaker 1 There are certain people that no matter what, you see them and you're like, holy fuck, like, this is crazy. This is a weird air to it.

Speaker 10 And like, I, I only know a few that have really gotten me, but like Tiger, it's, it's getting less with Tiger, but it's still, it's just still, it's, it's more weird.

Speaker 10 Like it's just, you know, the best player ever is, is, you, I still get to compete against him. Uh, but I met Michael Jordan's only other, the only person other than Tiger that I met.

Speaker 10 And I, that one floored me maybe more than Tiger Woods. Uh, Yeah, not to mention he's like really, really big, and that helps a little bit.

Speaker 10 My dog is going to town on her water.

Speaker 1 What kind of dog you got?

Speaker 10 I got a yellow lab.

Speaker 1 Oh, can we see her? Oh, you're so basic. Come here.
Come here. Yeah, bring her over.

Speaker 1 Did you now? Did you adopt your dog, or did you get it at a?

Speaker 1 Did you get it at a. Should I lie?

Speaker 1 Well, I mean, no, go ahead, tell it. So you did

Speaker 1 a breeder.

Speaker 10 I did a breeder.

Speaker 1 So you actually killed a dog

Speaker 1 when getting that dog, just so you know.

Speaker 10 Yeah, but honestly, I really love her. So I try not to think about that.

Speaker 1 Yeah, no, there's a dead dog right now with your name on it.

Speaker 10 I think my wife, Lacey, has serious kind of regret with that because almost every single day she follows some of those like dogs that get killed in China.

Speaker 10 If it was up to her, we'd have 7,000 dogs in my house.

Speaker 1 Why following the dogs in China? China? Just follow Keith Oberman on Twitter and you can just be depressed for the rest of your life.

Speaker 3 I had to actually mute him because

Speaker 3 he would go on these retweet sprees where it would be like 10 in a row. Like, this dog will die in 30 minutes unless you personally adopt it.

Speaker 1 I swear to God. Yeah, no, that is BFT's right.
It would be like, it'd be like, you have seven minutes to act. It's like, dude, I'm at work.
It's a Wednesday. What are you talking about?

Speaker 3 Every time I see it, the thought does occur to me, like, I should get a cab to the shelter right now and go save this dog's life.

Speaker 1 Just say that you donated to charity.

Speaker 10 That's a good, that's a good strategy because you're not going to get less people adopting those things.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 That's very true.

Speaker 3 Are you like the rest of the golf world when they put the tweet out in the morning of the pin placement at Augusta, where you look at it and you go through the holes?

Speaker 3 I guess it's kind of like what we would do when they announced the NFL schedule for the upcoming year and be like, okay, win, lost, lost, lost, win, win, loss, loss, loss.

Speaker 3 Are you like, okay, I'm going to birdie 13, 15 is going to fuck me over. And then 16, 17, I can make up that stroke there.

Speaker 10 Yeah, I mean, I look at it for sure. The Augusta or the Masters is cool because they have like so much

Speaker 10 their app or whatever we go. You can watch the other people play.
So I do that a little bit more. But when I look through the pins, it's always funny.

Speaker 10 Golfers, we all think we can like control everything in our head before we play. And I'm like, oh, yeah, one, that's easy.
It's either back right.

Speaker 10 Like, I'll be able to like, you know, hit one in there. Two, oh, yeah, front left, I'll be able to kind of of work it over there.

Speaker 10 And then like the first tall, like snap, snap hook, one into the left trees, and all of a sudden, like my entire plan is just completely gone to shit. So I'm trying a little more to just not really

Speaker 10 put too much into it before because

Speaker 10 it's just honestly, it's a waste of time. Because in my head, I'm never going to hit a bad shot.
And in reality, I hit a lot of them. Yeah.
So I need to be a bit more realistic with my

Speaker 10 visions of how the day is going to go.

Speaker 10 We didn't mention, I'm sorry, that's a bad job by me you hit a hole in one you hit a hole in one in competition that was the first time you ever done that in competition correct yeah as a pro yeah it was nuts uh because it was like the hardest day ever and somehow it went in and uh it was uh that was very fun um it was uh one of those

Speaker 10 Like holes in one are like the most, I feel like they're like 90% luck. Like the more, obviously the more good shots you hit, the more opportunity the ball has to go in the hole.
But

Speaker 10 you're never really like aiming at the hole that often as a pro. So So like it's always like almost a miss when it goes in.
So when it goes in, it's like truly jarring.

Speaker 3 Yeah, what if you hit like a beautiful five iron into a very significant breeze and it bounces twice and goes right in?

Speaker 3 At that point, if you were to do that in competition, would you say that you would absolutely release an official statement after your round was over talking about that?

Speaker 10 If I was playing with Ernie Ells and I beat.

Speaker 10 Good as and

Speaker 10 Ken Duke and somebody else without any strokes, without any type strokes, I would definitely

Speaker 10 write up a press release for sure. I don't know if anybody would read it, but yeah, how does that work though?

Speaker 3 If it's an actual tour event and you hit a hole in one, is it expected? Do you have to buy people drinks in the clubhouse?

Speaker 3 Is that do you guys meet for drinks, or is that just something us amateurs do?

Speaker 10 That locker room, uh, they just built a new one at Bay Hill. They actually do have a bar now, so I went in and like sat with the guys and

Speaker 10 paid for some drinks. I bought the media members drinks for Sunday when they had to do all the

Speaker 10 questioning of people who played better than me. And then I hadn't made one in so long.
I went on a spree. I just started Venmoing my friends money here and there.

Speaker 10 And I was like, have fun, get a drink. And

Speaker 10 that was my form of making sure that I kept up with the weirdest tradition in sports that the person who does something good

Speaker 10 has to spend asinine amounts of money after their favorite moment.

Speaker 1 I think that's a good. I mean, listen, when I win a big bet or something, it's like I throw it around left and right.
Let's go out. So it's good car.

Speaker 10 I didn't make like a direct amount of money from the hole in one.

Speaker 1 You didn't get like a, I would imagine you get like a car. You probably just, you're probably not, no.
You just probably forgot.

Speaker 1 You probably walked off and forgot because you're so not used to like, oh, no, you're playing on a Monday. That was on a Monday, right?

Speaker 10 No, no, no, no, no. That was on a Saturday.

Speaker 1 That was a weekend. Okay.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so you double from your end. All right, yeah, but you did have a Monday.
What was that day that you had that you were the lowest player that day and everyone was freaking out on Twitter?

Speaker 10 Players championship, second lowest score, but it was on a Monday.

Speaker 1 And I looked and it was like everyone was freaking out and tagging me in tweets being like, dude, you got to talk about Max. He's going off.
I looked up. It's like, you're like in 10th place.

Speaker 1 You're still in the middle.

Speaker 10 They overreacted. They really overreacted.

Speaker 10 That was, but don't put that on me. That was their bad.
They were excited.

Speaker 10 I don't often make runs.

Speaker 10 was that was our fifth major that was nearly the masters so i think they were just excited to see see me uh play through the entire weekend even more golf into monday uh it was uh it was a triumph of spirit on my on my part if i do say so myself um and yeah so i think that that was the excitement from everybody uh it was uh it was a little overreactive but it's okay it was a crazy run and i should give you credit i was more joking obviously but it was funny when i looked and i was like oh my god he's about to win the players and i looked i was like waiting

Speaker 1 but yeah, you went, what did you have?

Speaker 1 I'm looking at it right now. You had eight birdies in your final round.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 10 Damn. Birdies were,

Speaker 10 they were flying around that joint that day.

Speaker 1 That's awesome.

Speaker 11 Man, I'll tell you what. When you're hungry out there, you start acting like a rookie quarterback in his first game, making bad decisions, messing up the basics, being all out of sorts.

Speaker 11 That's where Snickers comes in, man. That thing is packed.
Roasted peanuts, nugget, caramel, milk chocolate. It's It's like the MVP of candy bars.

Speaker 11 And when you bite into it, boom, it sorts you out, gets your head back in the game of life, satisfying your hunger. Remember this.
Snickers handles your hunger so you can handle everything else.

Speaker 11 Snickers satisfies, man. That's a winning play.

Speaker 1 Have you like...

Speaker 3 had any assistance in playing Augusta because you've played it in video games so many times?

Speaker 10 100%.

Speaker 10 But again, it goes kind of to my problem where on the video game, I very rarely don't hit a really good drive and a really good second shot.

Speaker 10 And then they literally typically show you about what you need to do on the putt.

Speaker 10 So I need to, maybe if I could harness that

Speaker 10 ability or that kind of,

Speaker 10 it feels so easy on a video game, I need to like almost trick myself into thinking that.

Speaker 10 But I have played, I've played it a lot on video games.

Speaker 3 What you could do is you could just create a new character and make your new character really shitty. And then you could play Augusta on like the highest difficulty level.

Speaker 3 That way, when you play it in real life, it's like, oh, this isn't so hard.

Speaker 1 This is a lot of people.

Speaker 10 Everybody says that where they like build their actual character and like myself, I'd be like, okay, good at irons, like chipping.

Speaker 1 I'm not really going to give myself very much here.

Speaker 10 Like, can we write like streaky? Uh, I wonder if anybody does that because I think everyone just says, Oh, yeah, I bomb it. Like, I'm the longest guy of all my friends.

Speaker 1 Yeah, 99 across the board. That's the only way to play video games.

Speaker 1 Um, all right, so I'm listening I don't want to ask a mean question, but I did ask this question last time about can you win the masters?

Speaker 1 Your odds now are actually like they're 100 to one, so it's still like, holy shit, this would be an insane story, and everyone would be like, How could this possibly happen?

Speaker 1 And maybe like half the field got hit by a meteor, but you're still

Speaker 1 100 to one, you're now you're not the bottom. So, do you feel like you could

Speaker 1 win the masters? Yeah, 100%.

Speaker 1 If I was you, I'd argue,

Speaker 10 if I was a hater of myself, I'd argue that I had a better chance at last year's Masters when COVID was a lot more prevalent and COVID, not a meteor, could knock out quite a few players.

Speaker 10 Unfortunately, I did not get that done last year when I feel like I might have had my best shot.

Speaker 10 But maybe there will be some new, maybe some people will get into some bad lettuce.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 10 Knock a few guys out, a few of the top guys.

Speaker 10 But yeah, there's definitely a world where I can see myself winning the masters.

Speaker 1 Okay, so I mean, we're going baby steps. We're going to make the cut this year.
And I want everyone congratulating Max to the moon if he makes the cut because it's going to be a great moment.

Speaker 1 And then maybe next year we win the whole goddamn thing.

Speaker 10 Yeah. I think I definitely like the baby steps.
Um, and I definitely need to accomplish one goal.

Speaker 10 But I'm coming off of a made cut at my last major sometime last recently, last September or August, August, somewhere back then, maybe even July.

Speaker 10 So I'm streaking

Speaker 10 at the moment. So people aren't putting a lot of that into

Speaker 10 the momentum I'm feeling, but they're just missing out. I've been reeling off that for a while, which has been...

Speaker 10 That's been huge for my prep.

Speaker 3 Well, we asked the question somewhat jokingly on Monday's show, would you be the worst player in the history of golf to win the Masters?

Speaker 3 But we identified other players that would have been worse than you. So I don't think it's not unreasonable to think that you could win, right?

Speaker 3 Like you, you, if you play your very, very best golf and the course, the pin placements are all right in your wheel, if they don't max proof Augusta and you play at like 110% of your capability, you could win.

Speaker 10 I think they're probably thinking that right now at Augusta, how do we max proof this golf?

Speaker 10 We don't get the worst player to ever win the Masters.

Speaker 10 I would think that all those guys in their jackets are doing that at this moment.

Speaker 1 I would say that you would be the funniest guy to ever win the Masters. Not Patrick Reed.
Oh, yeah, Patrick Reed. Yeah, Patrick Reed's definitely funnier than you.

Speaker 10 I definitely had thought about that. You know, a lot of people sit around and say, what's your goal? You know, goals in life and dreams and aspirations.

Speaker 10 And mine was to be the funniest golfer to ever win the Masters.

Speaker 10 I feel like that'd be a huge honor. They're big in humor there in the post-round speech of Augusta National.

Speaker 1 They love jokes.

Speaker 10 So I'll I'll see how that fits.

Speaker 10 That'd be a huge moment for

Speaker 10 the masters, I think.

Speaker 3 Yeah, and for comedy, really. Like the first comedian to win.

Speaker 3 What about your pre-round meals? What do you have for breakfast? Let's just say that you're teeing off at, I don't know, 8 a.m.

Speaker 3 Do you have a big breakfast to carry you through that day, knowing that you're not going to be able to eat for a while?

Speaker 10 I try. I struggle, especially when I'm a bit nervous to eat a lot in the morning.
So I try and like choke down some eggs or an omelette or something.

Speaker 10 Usually get one piece of bacon

Speaker 10 because I'm half Jewish and don't want to just dive all the way into the pork game.

Speaker 10 Yeah, I

Speaker 10 fortunately, I just bring a bunch of snacks on the course. I'm more of like one of the, what do they say, you eat like a bird? Like a lot of, I just picket stuff all day.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 10 Try to keep myself going, but I have never, I've never been a good breakfast eater.

Speaker 1 No one's ever said that to me.

Speaker 3 So I don't really understand that saying.

Speaker 3 You could just hit the bowl out on the course, make yourself a little bit more hungry.

Speaker 10 Actually, I don't know if that's in the rule. I'll read the rules this year.

Speaker 3 If you win, you should smoke a bowl of Augusta grass.

Speaker 3 You should just be like, no weed, just pack it up, light it on fire. That would be sick.
You'd be a legend for that.

Speaker 10 Tremendously hard.

Speaker 1 Yes, yes, yes.

Speaker 1 Do you want to talk about your Lakers?

Speaker 1 I don't, but I will.

Speaker 1 I've been enjoying the hell out of this season.

Speaker 1 They actually, so at the time of this taping, they lost by like 50 points to the Mavericks on national television. They are right now out of the playoffs.

Speaker 1 Would you say LeBron's time in like

Speaker 1 in LA has been a complete bust? Because we don't count the Mickey Mouse championship.

Speaker 1 And do you, as a Lakers fan, feel disgraced because you basically threw Kobe aside and started loving LeBron more than you ever loved Kobe? And that's disgusting.

Speaker 10 Well, that is that

Speaker 10 I'm all in on the jokes, but the last one,

Speaker 1 dude, I can't believe that.

Speaker 1 If you say that, they get very upset.

Speaker 1 That one hurts my soul.

Speaker 10 Kobe Ryan's my favorite athlete ever.

Speaker 10 So

Speaker 10 the very real championship we won, that was fantastic.

Speaker 1 Where was that? Where did they win that?

Speaker 10 They in a bubble somewhere in Orlando.

Speaker 1 Oh.

Speaker 1 Sounds like where Mickey Mouse lives? Is that Epcot?

Speaker 10 He rents there.

Speaker 10 I don't think you guys know Mickey very well. Mickey is all over the place he you know he's he he's lived everywhere uh so it'd be unfair to just lock him down to one city okay um

Speaker 10 it has been tough i'm not gonna lie uh it's been hard defending uh it uh because obviously uh it's a pretty big stage out there in la and they are getting absolutely crucified for good reasons at times uh lebron has still been really good i feel like he's not getting a lot of uh he gets a lot of the criticism um although he does give himself quite a decent amount of praise

Speaker 3 He's not in any of the tweets when they lose. So, how can that be the criticism?

Speaker 1 Yeah, is he not in the tweets? No, he's never, his picture is never used in the losing tweets by the Lakers' main account. So, I don't know how, how would you even know that he was part of a loss?

Speaker 10 Um, maybe he never has lost, maybe, maybe that's the spin zone that LeBron has never lost. Well, here's the Lakers have lost a few games, it's been tough.
They just kind of not gelling at all.

Speaker 10 Um, they kind of

Speaker 1 this is late March, by the way, like the not gelling in when there's nine games left in the season.

Speaker 10 We haven't had enough reps together.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 10 I will say this. I've become friendly with

Speaker 10 Alex Caruso.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 10 And I do feel like he was the glue. And I don't know how to prove it other than the very real championship that they won.
And he was on that team.

Speaker 10 And of course, he went to your beloved Chicago Bulls. I do have a question for you, Big Cat.
I'm thinking of, just in case this came up.

Speaker 10 And just a way to rebuttal that a a little bit.

Speaker 10 Would you have traded right now, would you have traded my close personal friend Aaron Rodgers winning the Super Bowl this year to not have Coach K make this run in the in March Madness?

Speaker 1 No, no. So the way I put it is my hatred for Coach K is a five-alarm fire.
My hatred for Aaron Rodgers is literally the sun, the surface of the sun. So it's not even close, like not even close.

Speaker 1 This has been miserable for me. And by the time this is airing, we'll know the result.
But yeah, no, I hate Aaron Rodgers.

Speaker 1 And the fact that you're friends with him, I mean, that says a lot about the character that you have.

Speaker 1 I hope that... Are you vaccinated?

Speaker 3 Are you immunized?

Speaker 1 What's up with you?

Speaker 10 Oh,

Speaker 10 I just leave that up to the media to decide.

Speaker 1 Well, then you are friends with Aaron Rodgers. Good call.
That's HIPAA. Yeah.
That was a HIPAA violation.

Speaker 3 You could also say for the spend zone with LeBron, his ankle injury is horrible. He said after the game, like, my ankle right now, it's horrible.
It's basically broken.

Speaker 6 Yeah.

Speaker 10 I mean, okay. Listen,

Speaker 10 I'm all in on all that. Kobe Bryant, again, my favorite, would never say that.
I get that. But like, to be fair, it looks pretty bad.

Speaker 3 He did roll it. There is video evidence suggesting.

Speaker 1 He did clap the ground.

Speaker 3 Yes. I think the side of his leg touched the ground as he was standing up.

Speaker 1 But I would have played.

Speaker 1 I would have just tightened my shoes a little bit more.

Speaker 10 Yes. I mean,

Speaker 10 that's a fair point that maybe some other people would have played, like you, big cat.

Speaker 10 You can't judge your pain tolerance to someone else's pain tolerance.

Speaker 1 You're right. That's not fair.

Speaker 3 No true warrior, no true soldier would ever get taken out with something as minor as like an ankle or a heel injury. That just doesn't happen historically.

Speaker 10 I've never heard of that.

Speaker 3 You got the masters coming up. You've talked about how it feels like you get a little bit nervous on the days that,

Speaker 3 like before you play at what point do you settle down when you're out on the course?

Speaker 3 Is it like because we're talking to Brooks about this a couple years ago and he says that at some point he just he gets bored on the course around hole what like nine and he blacks out between holes nine and thirteen or fourteen do you do you have like a spot where you consistently find yourself settling in and you're no longer nervous Yeah, it's it's very similar to that.

Speaker 10 I would say typically after the first hole your like nerves kind of calm down especially if you just like make a very easy par and then it kind of dissipates.

Speaker 10 And then when you get to like 16, if you're playing well, which I do so often, those nerves kick back up, especially on the weekend.

Speaker 10 So it's like that middle ground bored. I wouldn't use the word bored

Speaker 10 for myself. It can still be a

Speaker 10 bit chaotic. So I got to keep my attention.
But

Speaker 10 yeah, for the most part, I don't get

Speaker 10 I don't I don't have like the full nerves all day. I just have them.
Geez, I just get them here and there. So

Speaker 10 it definitely beginning of the day, end of the day,

Speaker 10 that's where it's the worst, but that's where it's like the most fun, especially the end of the day.

Speaker 10 The beginning can be a bit annoying because the mornings feel like they take a while, but once that goes away, one hole in it usually kind of drops down.

Speaker 3 And one other thing I always wonder about Augusta is the caddy uniforms. I love them.
They're like painting outfits.

Speaker 3 They look like they're like the Walter White in Breaking Bad, like he's going to go out there and cook meth or something. And the Caddys get numbers on their uniforms.
What's the process like?

Speaker 3 And is there a specific number that your caddy likes to wear?

Speaker 10 His favorite number is 22. The process is, is when you check in.

Speaker 10 And so when you check in,

Speaker 10 whatever order that is, well, the guy who won last year gets number, his caddy gets number one.

Speaker 10 And then everybody just, whatever order you check in, I tried desperately because I knew about what day I was coming in, about what area the number was going to be.

Speaker 10 And I was trying desperately for 69. And I think I got 54.
so I was not even close.

Speaker 10 But I had this feeling. I was like, this is the year.
But Joe wants 22. That's his like lucky favorite.

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Speaker 1 My last question is for the people. Now we have fun because, you know,

Speaker 1 we bust balls, but we are truly rooting for you. So

Speaker 1 for the people, the AWLs, and everyone rooting for you,

Speaker 1 what is Thursday look like where we're like, okay, this is feeling good versus Thursday's bad.

Speaker 1 Let's change our plans here. Everyone get ready because Max is going to miss the cut yet again.

Speaker 10 I wish I knew, man. I wish I knew

Speaker 10 what would guarantee that even at the start of Thursday.

Speaker 10 I would like to say that if I go out there kind of bogey-free through nine holes, maybe one 200 through nine, it would be a great sign. It would mean I'm in control.

Speaker 10 But man, I've done some dumb things in my life,

Speaker 10 my golf life especially, that would warrant anything being.

Speaker 10 I would just wait till Friday afternoon to feel real comfy.

Speaker 1 Okay, let's do this then. How about on Thursday when you finish your round and you're on 18?

Speaker 1 If you feel good, and you don't have to do it, but if you feel good, maybe after you go pick up your ball, you do a little like hat flip so that people know, like, okay, we're feeling okay.

Speaker 10 Yeah, I think that's not a bad idea.

Speaker 10 On 18, I would do a little flat hat hat flip.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Just let us know that, like, yeah, like, that was good, but let's keep the positive vibes going into Friday.
Everyone be on alert.

Speaker 10 Yeah, like, nobody panic, but like, you know, things are progressing.

Speaker 1 I also want to just throw this out there to all the listeners.

Speaker 1 It's positive vibes only for Max, starting the minute you hear this,

Speaker 1 all the way until

Speaker 1 let's just start with all the way until Friday afternoon. Positive vibes.
Nice things tweeted at at him, just like, you know, puppy dogs

Speaker 1 could be from a breeder like Max, could be, you know, saving a life from, you know, an actual pound, whatever.

Speaker 1 Whatever it is, positive vibes only to Max for those two days so we can get him to Saturday and Sunday. And then when he gets to Saturday and Sunday, just light him up.
Just fucking be the meat.

Speaker 10 Like, look at it this way. If you positive vibes only through Friday, then it would mean that we all made the cut, overcame astronomical odds.
And then Saturday, Sunday, just go back to being mean.

Speaker 10 And I make a buggy, tell me I'm the worst. I could totally deal with that, but get me through Friday.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you know, it'd be great.

Speaker 3 If you missed the cut on Saturday, you should adopt the dog from a shelter in Augusta.

Speaker 3 And then it's like, guess what? If I had made the cut, this dog would have died.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay, that's cool.

Speaker 10 I hope they're not listening to that because I hope that there's no psychopath out there that might actually hold hold all that to me.

Speaker 10 But I like that idea. I probably need to run that one by my wife, but if I know my wife, she will immediately agree to that.

Speaker 1 Okay, so good. Yeah, so you got a dog.

Speaker 3 And also, bogey would be a great name for puppy.

Speaker 1 Bogey, great. Maybe double bogey if we're doing it for Max.

Speaker 1 Two of them.

Speaker 10 I mean, I said to cut it to double bogey.

Speaker 1 Yeah. All right.
Well, Max, best of luck for real. And again, everyone's got to be positive.

Speaker 1 We're sending him, like, even if he fucks up on Thursday or Friday, it's like, hey, you'll get the next one. Good job, Max.
Keep going. Saturday, we're back.
Yeah, right, exactly.

Speaker 1 Because it is nice to go on Twitter and just see people say nice things things about you. So over the top, the nicest things.

Speaker 10 I can't imagine anything better on that app to have some nice stuff being said.

Speaker 1 We'll lead from the front.

Speaker 1 You have our word. I'm sure you will.
All right. Thanks, Max.
Talk to you later, man. Good luck.

Speaker 3 Hey, it's PFT here, reminding you that Boarshead makes game day entertaining elevated and effortless.

Speaker 3 Whether you order catering platters ahead from your local Boarshead retailer, or you create your own spread at home with Boarshead premium deli meats and cheeses, you are sure to impress your guests.

Speaker 3 My favorites like oven gold turkey or blazing buffalo-style chicken, paired with their classic Vermont cheddar or creamy Munster cheese, are sure to score big and help me elevate my entertainment every time, whether it's for a tailgate or a home gating celebration.

Speaker 3 Seriously, guys, it's a game-changing flavor for every gathering. Boarshead, committed to craft since 1905.

Speaker 1 All right, let's wrap up. We got guys on chicks.

Speaker 1 Hank, why don't you get us going, guys on chicks?

Speaker 1 Let's do it.

Speaker 1 Let's do it. Are you feeling okay about reading right now?

Speaker 1 My brain is mush.

Speaker 3 Do you want to tap in, Bubba?

Speaker 1 My brain is so fried.

Speaker 6 What's up, boys? Especially dad bod cat.

Speaker 1 Oh,

Speaker 1 that's just straight up fat ass.

Speaker 1 Obese.

Speaker 6 It is. You should shave the mustache.

Speaker 1 No, you jerk.

Speaker 1 You know what? I'll shave my whole face if you shave yours. No.
Exactly. Okay.
Why don't guys like eating boneless wings?

Speaker 6 I order pizza pretty often, and on the Pizza Hut app, you can redeem points for free boneless wings, but my husband insists on paying for traditional wings because boneless wings are for children.

Speaker 6 Do guys just enjoy hot sauce all over their fingers? Plus, you get more meat with boneless, don't you? I don't understand why it's such a big deal.

Speaker 3 For me, I personally like to look at what I've accomplished after I'm done eating wings.

Speaker 3 That's part of the fun for me, is to look at the graveyard of chicken arms that I've just been able to eat and I can count how many I've eaten. That's fun.
That's fun for guys.

Speaker 1 It's for, I like boneless wings. I like regular wings more.
Boneless wings are when you just don't want to put in the effort. You know what I mean? Like if you're just

Speaker 1 sometimes it's nice to get a blowjob instead of have sex kind of thing. Like, I don't want to, you know what I mean? Like I just want to be able to eat this.
I don't have to deal with bones.

Speaker 1 I don't have my hands all gross. Like sometimes it's just nice, right?

Speaker 1 Also, we forgot to mention Stanford Steve, maybe the most alpha move ever when we got wings he ordered a side of buffalo sauce in like they brought it in like a soup container and he was dipping his wings for more buffalo sauce which i liked it is a pretty it's a solid move yeah it's aggressive though

Speaker 1 he was coming at billy's neck oh billy yeah he was he was yeah

Speaker 7 boneless wings are slow twitch muscles and bone in wings are fast twitch muscles Got it.

Speaker 1 Darcy. In terms of on the chicken.
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. Okay.
But I. Does that correlate?

Speaker 6 Like, if you eat more more boneless, does that help you?

Speaker 7 I think it has more higher mineral density.

Speaker 1 I don't trust anyone who goes all boneless all the time. I think it's one of those things that you just do every now and then, like, as a change of pace.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I mean, to me, boneless wings are just chicken nuggets. Yeah.
They're chicken nuggets with sauce, which is fine. It's not a problem.
I just, I don't look at them as being wings. Correct.

Speaker 3 It's like my costume is not, my culture is not your costume when you try to call them wings.

Speaker 6 What's up, boys? I recently offered to treat my boyfriend of a few months to dinner at a local steakhouse. He ordered an appetizer, the most expensive steak, and four drinks.
Yes.

Speaker 6 He then asked if I would treat to ice cream. Yes.
I said yes because I really like him, but I have an average job and other things to take care of.

Speaker 6 Do I just never offer again or tell him he has to keep it to a minimum? Thanks, boys.

Speaker 1 That is kind of a dick move if he just went most expensive thing on the menu.

Speaker 1 Because like steakhouse is one of those things where if you specifically order the most expensive steak, you're kind of an asshole for that.

Speaker 1 Like if someone who who, like, in this situation, if it was like, you know, maybe like a business thing where it's like, oh, it's on the corporate card, but there's always that one steak that's like $150.

Speaker 3 The one that, like, yeah, that Salt Fey personally prepares for you.

Speaker 3 So, what he should have done is he can order the expensive steak, he can get the appetizers, he can do the drinks, but instead of ordering the ice cream at the restaurant, he should just be like, no, you know what?

Speaker 3 We've got stuff at home. Not made you stick around while he makes you pay for an extra dessert.

Speaker 3 And then he'll just like stop by the grocery store, pick up ice cream on the way home, and that's his contribution to dinner. Yeah.
It just would have been nice for him to think about that.

Speaker 1 I was just thinking about this because,

Speaker 1 so if you go out to dinner with your girlfriend's parents, maybe the first time you meet them, what is it? What would you say?

Speaker 1 Third most expensive steak is where you have to, that's the ceiling?

Speaker 3 My rule is you go one level beneath what her dad orders.

Speaker 1 Right, but what if you order first? No, you don't. But what if?

Speaker 3 No, you don't.

Speaker 1 You literally say

Speaker 1 you order first.

Speaker 3 I would hold my breath and die.

Speaker 1 All All right, so that would be worse than ordering the most expensive steaks.

Speaker 3 It's very important to be like, to let them establish the basic state.

Speaker 1 But he keeps on saying, I'm not ordering until you order. Well, I'm not going to order.

Speaker 3 It looks like we're just going to be in a standoff, Mr. X.

Speaker 1 What are you going to say, Billy? Me and your daughter are pretty hot on suggestions.

Speaker 7 What? If there's like a suggestion thrown out there, like, this is good here.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 I think like the third or fourth most expensive steak is there. There's just always that feel.
You have to judge who you're with. Like you don't, if you're out with someone who maybe can't afford

Speaker 1 a super expensive steak just don't be that guy yeah don't there's really good steaks that aren't the most expensive steak don't order the special either right right what's up big daddy cat short king pft and famed duke alumni hank

Speaker 6 my boyfriend and i live in la and have been dating for around three years he's great i'm 22 he's 24 he has a job he's clean he's funny and our sex life is great he's clean there's one problem though that's good i've recently stopped smoking weed and he's still smoking at least twice a day we've had discussions about it, but whenever I bring up the fact that he should at least try to cut back, he just replies, smoke weed every day, and laughs.

Speaker 6 Is there merit to my argument or should I not care? Because sometimes I want to go out and do things, not just sit around with a stoner.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I mean, there's some merit to it.

Speaker 1 But on the other hand, you were smoking before. Yeah, you started dating.

Speaker 3 You got too good for him. Yeah, you think you're better than him.

Speaker 1 You kind of pulled out the rug on him. Yeah.
Like, he's not...

Speaker 1 He thought, like, he definitely went around being like, yeah, my girlfriend's so sweet. We smoke pot all the time.
It's awesome. She just gets me.

Speaker 1 The next thing you know, you're being a narc on his ass.

Speaker 6 Like, if he got into CrossFit and then started pressuring, like, you know, you can't. That's something else that happens.
I feel like sometimes people get super into exercise.

Speaker 1 It's like, I didn't sign up for this.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 I would say,

Speaker 1 I mean, there's definitely the people who smoke so much that it's their entire personality. If that's the case, I think you probably have to break up.

Speaker 3 Yeah, it's not going to work. Like, you can't have somebody that's stone cold sober and somebody that's like high

Speaker 1 If it's Buddha Ben, Buddha Ben needs a... Well, he's building.

Speaker 3 But he needs a Buddha babe that understands him and gets him.

Speaker 1 Correct.

Speaker 3 But you can't pair up like a stone cold sober person with that because the personality is just, you don't align.

Speaker 3 So

Speaker 3 he also has a really good comeback every time you tell him to stop, which is just saying smoke weed every day. Yeah.
There's really nothing you can say to that.

Speaker 1 Maybe he just smokes a little less weed. He's going to be fine.

Speaker 6 Yeah, just don't smoke in the morning.

Speaker 1 But yeah, this does feel like this is headed for a collision course. It sounds like you want to go out and do stuff.
And he's like, uh,

Speaker 1 should we watch Avatar for the 75th time?

Speaker 3 Maybe just switch him over to Sativa instead of Indica. Get him outside.
Go for a hike.

Speaker 1 I like that.

Speaker 6 My boyfriend and I have been dating for two and a half years. When we started dating, he had been broken up with his ex for a year.

Speaker 6 I noticed very quickly that the Spotify playlist we always use had a cover photo of his ex-girlfriend. Uh-oh.

Speaker 6 Note, you can't really see her face because she's pointing at the logo on her hat, which is actually his hat that she's wearing. But it's obviously obviously her.

Speaker 6 I never said anything because I didn't want to come off crazy, and I knew the relationship was over. Two years later, we used his playlist occasionally, so the pic still pops up.

Speaker 6 My friends say they are shocked. I never confronted him or asked him to change it.
Should I have been upset and asked him to change the picture when we started dating?

Speaker 6 Should I ask him to change it now?

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 You're cool. Like, if you're confident in yourself.

Speaker 1 And you trust your boyfriend, it's a nothing burger.

Speaker 3 It sounds like she's only upset because some of her friends got upset about it.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's a nothing burger in my mind.

Speaker 1 If you are, like I said, confident in yourself, trustworthy of your boyfriend, healthy relationship, nothing burger.

Speaker 3 I also think the quality of the playlist matters here, too. It sounds like it's a banger.

Speaker 1 Yeah, just keep bringing it up. Yeah, that's true.
So maybe that part, like, because then it's like, oh, man, this is our, like,

Speaker 1 I mean, if it's like your fuck playlist, then yeah, definitely change it. But

Speaker 1 I think you're doing the right thing. Don't listen to your friends.

Speaker 1 Be yourself.

Speaker 6 All Alright, last one. This is a good one.
Big cat and the rest of the crew. I'm currently seven months pregnant with my boyfriend and my boyfriend's and my first child.

Speaker 6 Before the tournament, my boyfriend made me choose 64 potential names that he then proceeded to rank and put in a bracket form. Love it.
We know we're having a girl.

Speaker 6 As the college teams moved on, so did our names. I thought it was a fun little joke, but now that the tournament is over, he is dead set that we now have a name picked out and he won't budge from it.

Speaker 6 How do I explain to him that we can't name our firstborn based on the system?

Speaker 1 Why not?

Speaker 3 Yeah. What is the name?

Speaker 1 What one?

Speaker 1 Okay, so my problem with this is if you agreed to this, you have to, it's legally binding. You shouldn't have done this.

Speaker 1 Like if I had, if I had proposed this, it would have been shot down immediately, which is the normal thing to do.

Speaker 1 Like we're not naming our child off of a completely random tournament, but you agreed to it. And now, guess what? Your only recourse here is have another kid and then you get to name that kid.

Speaker 6 It sounds like maybe, though, he kind of just did it and was like, oh, babe, look, I'm doing this funny little bracket thing.

Speaker 6 And she's like, I'm seven months pregnant. I'm just trying to, like,

Speaker 6 get this baby out. Whatever, go watch the tournament.
And now it's coming to a head.

Speaker 1 Both of my children were named after they were born. Like, okay, now we got to get them.
You kind of got to meet them first.

Speaker 3 Yeah, it's weird to just set them up with a name and then have it not fit. Like, I'm curious to know what the name for Kansas was.

Speaker 3 It had to be one that he liked going into it because they were a one seed.

Speaker 1 Ask yourself this. Cerulean?

Speaker 3 Was it Cerulean?

Speaker 1 This is.

Speaker 1 Shout out the boy.

Speaker 1 Ask yourself this. If

Speaker 1 a name you liked had won,

Speaker 1 would you have been cool with the system? And if that's true, then I think it's tough shit. You got to just deal with it.
And then have another kid and you get to name it.

Speaker 1 Like say this for your back pocket. When you have another child, you can be like, remember when we did your stupid system? I'm getting to name this kid.

Speaker 1 I think that's all you got. And it's also kind of a cool story.
She'd be like, I got named after Kansas.

Speaker 1 There was a floorboard that was loose under Armando Bay Cott's foot, and that's how I ended up with my name.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I mean, that's really like you have to take your hat off to the guy. He's trying to be a dad, he's trying to contribute to the pregnancy and birthing process.

Speaker 3 But us guys, sometimes we just have to put things in bracket format to really appreciate them.

Speaker 1 Understand it. He tried.
Yeah. All right, numbers.

Speaker 1 And then sleep.

Speaker 1 25. eight twenty two

Speaker 6 six Hank what's that look I might just do I might just start again

Speaker 1 one okay starting again the huge

Speaker 1 you have to say it you'll

Speaker 1 seven

Speaker 1 if it catches

Speaker 1 Didn't catch we're still going to be fast one we're still going numbers stay real that was if If you had guessed seven, you got a bad beat there.

Speaker 1 Who dinged up 71, by the way?

Speaker 1 Uh-oh.

Speaker 1 73. Got a little assist there.
Yeah.

Speaker 3 This machine.

Speaker 1 The machine's almost two years old now. It's starting to...
Might have to get a new one. Fourth time.

Speaker 1 Fourth time, okay.

Speaker 7 Bobcats are killing invasive Burmese pythons in the Everglades.

Speaker 3 Love you guys.

Speaker 1 Is that a good or bad thing? Good.

Speaker 3 pythons or trash.

Speaker 3 Talking away.

Speaker 3 So I know what I'm to say. I'd say anything anyway.

Speaker 3 Today's only not the day to find you. Shy away.

Speaker 3 Oh, I'll be coming for your love, okay.

Speaker 3 Shy away.

Speaker 3 Oh, I'll be coming for your love, okay.

Speaker 3 Take

Speaker 3 on

Speaker 3 me,

Speaker 3 take

Speaker 3 me

Speaker 3 on.

Speaker 3 I'll be

Speaker 3 gone

Speaker 3 in a I tell

Speaker 3 you

Speaker 3 Needless to say

Speaker 3 I've hard said it's But please turn a little way

Speaker 3 Cause early learning but life is okay

Speaker 3 Say after me

Speaker 3 It's not better to be safe and sorry

Speaker 3 Say up to me

Speaker 3 It's not better to be safe and sorry

Speaker 3 Say

Speaker 3 come

Speaker 3 me

Speaker 3 Take

Speaker 3 me

Speaker 3 on.

Speaker 3 I'll be

Speaker 3 gone

Speaker 3 every day of the

Speaker 3 day.

Speaker 3 All the things I can say,

Speaker 3 yeah.

Speaker 3 Just to play my worries away.

Speaker 3 You're all things I've got to remember.

Speaker 3 You're shying away.

Speaker 3 I'll be coming for you anyway.

Speaker 3 You're shy and away.

Speaker 3 I'll be coming for you anyway.

Speaker 3 Take

Speaker 3 on

Speaker 3 me.

Speaker 3 Take

Speaker 3 me

Speaker 3 on.

Speaker 3 I'll be gone

Speaker 3 in a day

Speaker 3 of me

Speaker 3 I'll be

Speaker 3 gone

Speaker 3 in a day

Speaker 3 You

Speaker 3 dream of me.