Max Homa, Kansas Wins The National Championship And Guys on Chicks

Hey, Pardon My Take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music.
On today's Pardon My Take, we have our good friend Max Homa to get us ready for the Masters. He's going to make the cut this year, guaranteed.
Hold on, PFD say something nice about Max while I drink a little water. I think that Max Homa's hats have gotten exponentially better over the last like three years.
When we first saw him break out onto the tour, they looked like they were prescription sombreros. They've shrunk down to a normal size now.
Yep. I'm back.
Good point. We also have our recap of the championship game, New Orleans weekend.
We're back in studio. Billy's back with us.
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Oh, we're gonna rock down to Elaine. It's Pardon My Take presented by Barstool Sports.
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Today is Wednesday, April 6th, and the Kansas City Jayhawks are national champions. Thank you Mark Emmert.
Congratulations Kansas City. Yes.
All time. Actually in the Missouri.
The college is located in Missouri. To really piss off people.
It was a great moment to have Mark Emmert give the trophy to Bill Self who is facing five what is it? Level one sanctions. Level one which sounds very serious, but a great national championship game.
It's funny to think that a level one sanction is like he emailed a kid during the wrong month of the calendar year. Right.
It's also just a perfect, like, it is the perfect champion for this day and age where it's like the rules have changed. I'd say most people don't give a fuck about college players getting paid whatsoever.
And the NCAA has just been dragging their feet, so they could have taken care of this a long time ago. Instead, they're giving a trophy to a school that is also facing violations.
But this was also justice, though, for Kansas for 2020. Because going into that tournament tournament remember we sat down we did the the fake bracketology when we found out that we had the tournament ripped from our hands on the eve of the coronavirus and we uh i think we had kansas as the number one overall seat i think we picked them to win the championship in 2020 in the fake bracket it's good to see kansas get this back i like it i like it when a state like kansas they've got one thing that they really care about and that's just college basketball it's good to see Kansas get this back I like it I like it when a state like Kansas they've got one thing that they really care about and that's just college basketball it's good to see them get back in the winner circle yeah they were 28 3 28 and 3 in 2020 and they look like the best team in the country um it's it's a testament to how crazy this tournament is Kansas if you went back, like since they last won in 2008, this is not even close to their best team, but that doesn't matter.
The tournament is, you know, every single year we see the most talented team or the best team falter or a team that doesn't look like they have it all and they get to the Final Four. So this just proves like, hey, the tournament is its own and being able to to win and cut down the nets and the last weekend or the first weekend of april last weekend of march it doesn't really matter if you are the best kansas team they've had in the last 15 years and they deserve it and they were the better team on uh monday night that 16 point come 15 point comeback at halftime it's crazyime was incredible.
Their defense just shut down UNC. And Bill Self, here's my question.
Bill Self, is he now, and Jake, feel free to chime in, does Bill Self now, out of all the active coaches, have the second-best resume only to Rick Pitino? His resume is pretty incredible at this point. This second one for Bill Self puts him in rarefied air, and it kind of cements everything that he's done at Kansas and how consistently great they've been year in and year out.
Coach Cal. Cal has one.
I think Jay Wright, too. Jay Wright has two.
Jay Wright has two. He had a chance for three and six years.
Well, but I mean, yeah, Kansas has also had a chance for a lot. Yeah, well, he had two before this.
Yeah, Jay Wright would be, you could throw him out there. Bill Self has more wins than Jay Wright.
Bill Self also has gone to the tournament 23 straight years, and that's including three different teams. So that's Tulsa, Illinois, and Kansas.
He's also, out of those 23 years, 12 out of 23 he's gotten to at least the elite they don't lose early like Duke has to Mercer and Lehigh Kentucky to St. Peter's they always make a little bit of a run last year they're off in the second round but they always they always make a run which is crazy like the consistency to get to the elite eight half of the years that you're in the tournament and you're in the tournament every year that's that pretty – I think any fan base would sign up for that.
They win the Big 12 every year. They win the Big 12 tournament every year.
And now he has two, which is – that's like what puts him ahead. Izzo and Boeheim and those guys.
They were quadruple champions, right? They won the Big 12 tournament. They won the Big 12 regular season.
They won the Midwest bracket and then they won the championship.

Big season for them.

Jake, how did your final last redemption bracket do?

I actually forgot to

cement it. I was going to say Kansas.

Ah, it doesn't count though.

Yeah, so you went 0 for

4 on brackets? 3.

0 for 3. But the third one was on purpose.

You guys won't believe me though. Yeah, we won't believe you.

But that was, I mean, Kansas

I think Bill Self is

I'm sorry. four on brackets three oh for three but the third one was on purpose you guys won't believe me yeah we won't yeah no but that was never i mean kansas bill i think bill self is i i think you make that argument besides patino because if you just look at the totality of everything that he's done i think he's like somewhere four or five on the active list for wins and obviously this conversation happens because coach k just retired uh but he – Well, Coach K's legacy is also forever stained.

It's like if Bill Self lost two important games to end his season this year,

we would put that as a big knock.

He would not be in the Rick Pitino.

Who does have the most Final Four pitches?

Rick Pitino remains unstained.

Yes.

Tyler Hansborough –

Coach K does.

Yeah, Tyler Hansborough said –

But he's not active.

He's retired.

He's over.

We talked to Tyler Hansborough on Monday when he came on Barstool Live

I'll see you next time. Tyler Hansborough said he's retired, he's over we talked to Tyler Hansborough on Monday when he came on Barstool Live at Walk On, shout out Walk Ons and he said that was Coach K's last game but not his last season because he's going to keep his corner office he's going to hover over the whole program but this isn't about Coach K, this is about Bill Self and Bill Self, he might be facing these sanctions but this really was like a legacy cementer for him because getting that second is very very important and like he said before this final four like it now validates all those elite eights all those big 12 titles uh regular season and tournament the entirety like the totality of his resume now is insanely impressive to win titles 14 years apart.
The game was also insane. It was a crazy game.
So it started out, Kansas looked like they were going to just put it on in the first couple minutes. Then UNC went on a run for the ages and it looked like UNC was going to win by 15, 17 points.
The first half was like as bad as it could have gone for Kansas. Yeah.
I don't think anybody gave him any shot to win. It's I didn't.
I basically just gave up at that point. I went upstairs, took a shit, which, by the way, I don't know if you guys are feeling the same way I am, but I don't think I've pooped as much in terms of times, visits to the bathroom, as I've made in the last 36 hours after being in New Orleans.
I'm on a pretty regular schedule. Yeah, I'm doing okay.
Really? Yeah, I'm doing all right. It's really, all the holes are open right now.
Okay. But yeah, it was back.
Back to the game? But back to the game. Hubert Davis at halftime, by the way.
I'm going to, listen, big cat, let you do your basketball takes the way you want to. I'm going to do my basketball takes the way I want to.
Oh, yeah, sit back to the game. I was taking a shit at halftime.
Okay. And after I finished my shit, I came downstairs and I watched the second half.
And in the second half, it was also just like crazy stuff was happening to UNC left and right. There was the floor that buckled underneath Armando Baycott.
And then there was the Caleb Love also like re-injured his leg a little bit. Yeah, he twisted his ankle.
And then Manic was just all over the place. It was crazy.
I don't recall seeing a championship game that had swings. Usually when there's a close game, it stays close the entire time.
It's not like there's ever a time where there are two swings back and forth. Yeah, well, Puff Johnson also puked.
UNC's resiliency was insane this entire tournament, this entire season. I do think that floorboard thing is insane.
Like that and who knows? Kansas might win anyway, but Baycott gets hurt. And then the game winning shot is McCormick down low on a mismatch with Mannix.
So everything is because Baycott steps on a floorboard that's not properly put in. The NCAA should be ashamed.
It looked like that gym that Zion was jumping off of the other day, which I found out the slam ball court-looking court. It's actually a recovery court that they use for softer landings and softer takeoffs.
I need that. For injured players.
It's just a walk around on all the time. Yeah.
But yeah, it buckled underneath him. I don't know how that happens.
Hubert Davis, what I was going to say at halftime, I wasn't judging you for shitting. I just don't have the same – I didn't have the same issues.
Yeah. So what I was going to say was at halftime, Hubert Davis was like, everyone thought we were going to have a letdown spot in this championship game.
This is a championship game. We want to win this game.
And it little bit like he was like we got this it's good we're up 15 so if you're waiting for the letdown spot it was just you just had to wait a half yeah because then and and unc was battered and bruised and everyone got hurt and man it got smoked three times in the face but unc like they're they win toughest team award for for fighting till the bitter end and kansas is your champion walking around town after the game was over we ran into a few different unc fans and they were all like super happy still that was their national championship championship on saturday night on on monday they were just like you know what we're glad to be here we beat coach k that's fine i saw a couple unc fans this morning and i love love this move because Hank and I saw this back in New Orleans after Clemson lost to LSU.

The morning after the game, you go out there and you put on your shirt of when your team did win the championship. Yeah.
Like two years ago. I saw a few UNC fans walking around wearing old championship shirts.
It's like, well, we still have this one. Well, and I think UNC fans, obviously, they're probably very disappointed,

but they're an eight seed that had lost to Pittsburgh at home in late February. They don't have crazy NBA talent.
Neither does Kansas, really. Obagi will be a good NBA player, I would assume.
I mean, who else, Jake? Like McCormick is probably going to be. Yeah, Wilson's been back and forth.
Yeah, there'll be guys who will be in the NBA, but neither team has, like, top three picks. So UNC is getting there, and none of those guys are these names that you're like, oh, we're going to watch him for the next 15 years.
They are great names, though. Yeah.
Like, awesome names. You got Puff Johnson, Remy Martin, Calebaleb love it's awesome yeah it was uh yeah i mean it was it was good at great final four great final four great march oh hank's rolling his eyes you can't say it was a great final four for the fans yeah for the fans yeah it was better than last year who else would in the year before yeah best three years.
There we go. Actually, no.
Last year's was probably better. Last year we had a buzzer beater.
Yeah. I'm waiting.
I'm withholding judgment until I find out exactly what the ratings were on these. That's the only time I can truly understand whether a game was good or not to watch.
Well, I don't think there would be that. They're not going to be historical by any measure because it was TBS, notbs right which they change back and forth every year so with duke unc obviously it's got to be like one of the highest it's just it'll be remembered as one of the best ever let's find it um watched and the last can you find the ratings for us jake what's the duke unc because because we'd like to pft is right whether whether we like the game or not.
The final thing we have for March Madness is Billy. Billy and the sheet, the conclusion of the sheet.
A reminder for everyone out there, we gave Billy $2,000. Cash.
Cash to start – he got very scared of it – to start the tournament, and he was going to employ his arbitrage and whatever split-strike trading methods, whatever he was going to do to get a profit. And did you get a profit? We did get a profit.
Yeah. There is profit.
Let's go, Billy. Yes.
So originally we put $5 on upsets, $20 on futures of the favorite, and that only cost about seven hundred dollars in the beginning and then we use the rest of the 1300 to sort of see how it played out put more futures in different places um to hopefully in the end get profit uh if you and c had won we would have made seven hundred dollars profit but you know going to the game where it's like we're either going to win $50 or $700, kind of just let it ride. Profits and profits.
So we ended up winning $50 profit? $50 profit. Whoa, what's in there? That's $25 per person? Yeah, and I brought a lot more cash.
Oh, nice. There we go.
We got a brick of cash. Oh, my God.
How much is in that? We got $2,050 in ones in a brick. Download the YouTube to see it.
Where did you get this? It's like shrink-wrapped. Well, look, I had to strap it.
You got to go to the strip club. Yes.
Bonk. Bonk.
Bonk. Bonk.
Well, it was a weird ATM. But yeah.
Wait, it was a weird ATM? Look, I had to get cash. You basically just handed us no cash back.
Ones,es I can't do anything with You know what we have to do with this We just have to toss it up in the air We have to make it rain in the studio With this cash that Billy made us Billy I thought you were going to Redeposit it And do our master's bet Well we can't do that Okay I did this before Give it back to him I honestly I honestly Give it back to him Okay well first The first thing I'm going to do Is I'm going to make make it rain In the studio And then Billy's job Is gonna be to pick it up No that's fucked Yeah Here Wait I just wanna hold The cash for a second Yeah there's tons It's in ones and fives They're just using Rubber bands at the bank now Yeah It was pretty cool Going to the bank And getting that out I wanted to at least Give you guys What seems like more cash than you gave me just in paper. That was smart.
There's tons of cash. It came out profit.
Good job, Billy. I'm proud of you.
Shout out Berserker Sheets. I see a five in there somewhere.
There's a couple fives mixed in. It's just a ton of cash.
I want to roll it over. I don't want this money back.
It's so much money that they had to weigh it when they gave it to us.

They didn't even count it. I also wanted to show I wasn't scared of cash, so I just got a ton of cash.

Yeah, it's true.

Yeah.

You're totally not scared.

Exposure therapy.

Why are you sweating?

To cash.

Yeah.

Well, it was cool when it was in the shrink wrap, but now that it's out, it's kind of-

Yeah.

It's annoying.

It's just a bunch of ones.

You didn't take that on the train, though.

You waited until you got close to the office.

Yeah.

We're baby steps.

Do you want to throw up a stack?

Billy's going to have to clean it.

I'm not trying to.

He won us money.

I don't want to be a jerk to him.

There you go.

Just one of them.

Just one of them.

Okay, that was cool.

That was pretty cool.

That was cool.

Yeah, let's do it on a Max.

I want to put all this money on Max to make the cut. Perfect.
Let's So you need the cash back Yes Okay The ladies are going to be so angry at me when I bring it back That's perfect yeah Take all the cash back I told the lady Are you worried about taking the cash back Yes I told the lady at the window that I was filming a music video And that's why I'm using it back and be like uh music video went well yeah music video over we could keep the 50 because that's that's the profit yeah yeah then we're just reinvesting the initial 50 right there that's 100 i threw 100 yeah all right so yeah we can keep that that could be like a slush fund for coffee sweet and then we'll reinvest the rest i'm just i'm very proud of billy because when you first started talking about this spreadsheet it sounded like the biggest bunch of horse shit i'd ever heard in my life and somehow it worked out and i'm i'm proud of your brain billy thank you really the like two actual gambling decisions where i had to like put a risk was that saint peter's wouldn't win the whole thing and that duke organzaga wouldn't go the whole way that was really the two. Now, did you have fun or was it stressful? It seemed like it was way more stressful than fun.
It was very stressful. Yeah.
But I had time. Yeah.
But it did seem at points it was like this is. I'd be sitting in front of an Excel spreadsheet for just hours.
Randomly. For $50? Yeah.
Your one last assignment for this besides putting this all in Maxoma to make the cut is you should actually try to figure out how much time you actually spent on this so we could figure out what you got paid hourly to do this. It's probably somewhere around, I'm going to say $5 an hour.
Okay. Well, this is also like a lot of times they they always like to tell you on the news like this is the time of year where more wages are stolen from employers than any other month because everyone's paying attention to basketball you're actually like making more money by doing less real work for the company by doing this so we appreciate your efforts billy couple double negatives in there.
Yeah. No, you did it.
Sweet. Thank you.
Jake, your thoughts from Press Row. I saw you talk to Bill Self afterwards.
Yeah, I got denied at first. It was great.
His hair looked real? It was fine, yeah. Yeah? From what I saw.
Okay. So tell us, yeah, you got denied and then you stayed persistent? I found them, yeah.
Don't give up, boys and girls. So you were walking around right after the game on the floor.
Yeah, I was on the floor with the confetti and everything. Did you turn your ankle? No.
Okay, did you notice any floorboards loose? No. Okay.
So we're clear. Yeah, I got some cool interviews.
I got Bill Self. I got Mitch Lightfoot, who's a, I think he's a Barstool athlete, but he's a Stly regardless yep uh paul pierce pregame yeah that was cool yeah you by 15 and they were down 15 and half covering covering covering your first final four was really cool you wanted it to be and more it was awesome yeah it was really cool um it's kind of tough because i feel like i don't know how a final four could be better than that with the storylines and everything.
The only way I feel like a Final Four experience could be better is, A, if one of my teams are in it and wins it, or B, if I'm calling it one day. I don't know how else it could get better.
You will. You'll call it one day, Jay.
Hopefully. So what about One Shining Marshmint? What about your list of plays? Yeah, I just watched it through again.
We're around 50% again. Okay, that's pretty's pretty good yeah not as good as billy he's sounds like you were slightly below 50 oh billy was slightly above were you slightly below 50 i have to do the exact calculations but where would you say honest opinion where you think you land this is what we'll take 47 okay and bill.
And Billy, our Billy was what, 50.5%? I think 50.25. 1.5% growth.
Yeah. I like that.
Which over time, if you... Billy, you're a new host of Benchmark.
Congratulations. Could use a break from the other two anyway.
Honestly, I'd come on that show. That was very smart of you, Jake.
You absolutely, that worked just as you planned to be like, hey, that's the old Tom Sawyer. Like, oh, I'll let you wash this fence if you want to.
He was like, sure. Enjoy.
Very smart. All right, yeah, great trip to New Orleans.
New Orleans is, I mean, we said it, I think, on Sunday, but when you're in New Orleans for four days, it feels like 400 um I think we all were limping this morning it was it was one of those things where we came back and no one was saying anything all morning because we were just all dead uh yeah take a couple days to recover I don't know it's a great trip New Orleans is a great city to be in great great people great food great drinks it just takes a lot out of you it's obviously a bigger sporting event uh the super bowl but i think the final fours is borderline a funner because the it really is what steve said yeah it's the it's the sunday that you have that you like you get basically to drink all day saturday then you get a sunday to kind of like explore a city have fun see friends all that stuff i also like multiple teams being in the same city you've got the different fans from all over the country that get involved as opposed to super bowl where it's just like it's either you're a celebrity or you're a fan of one or two of the teams yeah no it's it's i love the final four i'll go to the final four every year i actually also like had a little moment where i was like final four feels like the most father-son event that happens in the sports calendar so i might that that might i don don't know how to tradition. Not the Final Four.
We would go to a first-round tournament site for like 15 straight years. Yeah, because you do see a lot of that.
You see a lot of families walking around, which is kind of nice because, I don't know, it's just nice. Starr Roy Williams in the casino.
Yeah, he was there all the whole weekend. Sneaky, for a guy that doesn't cuss ever, he spends like 99% of his life at a craps table.
Yeah. He loves gambling.
He was everywhere this weekend. There was also rumors about the Honey Badger being there at like 8 a.m.
in the morning, and then I saw today that he's visiting with the Saints. So it's good that the timing worked out for him there.
That was perfect timing for him. And thank you to Mincy, the King of the South, for being a great host all weekend long.
He changed the video game. He did.
Forever. Forever.
Forever. He was stop motion, you said? He did a video at the game after the game was over that looked like it was shot in two frames per second.
It's art. It's truly art.
Like the Nightmare Before Christmas mixed with an A-Ha video.

It was perfect.

I don't know who makes these videos

for him.

Fifth most watched Final Four game, by the way.

Fifth?

The number one was Wisconsin-Kentucky.

That's in the modern era, though.

So that means we liked the game.

We enjoyed the game.

Yeah, we enjoyed it slightly less than when

Wisconsin was on CBS

it probably would have been

yeah yes yes

alright let's do Hot Seat Cool Throne

then we got Max Homa on the show

to preview the Masters

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Okay. Hank.
My hot seat is anyone traveling in the manchester airport today in london i don't know if it's still like this today it's south london manchester is just like south of town okay you just got corrected did i say it was north london no no i was establishing a baseline of facts because there will be some listeners out there that'll be like whoa hank just just said that Manchester is in London, and they're going to get mad, so I have to correct and be like, yeah, he knows that it's in South London, but you don't have to get mad at Hank for saying that. He's basically saying that you called Jersey City New York City.
Which is basically the same thing. Right.
There's videos. It's a horror show.
The security line is if you pulled up to the terminal Where you get cabs The security line is out the door Around the corner Everyone, people are just leaving bags Because the baggage claim is taking too long What happened? I don't know the reason for it But I saw a Twitter thread And it looks quite literally Like I am legend when they're trying to leave the city.

So apparently it's been a bad couple weeks and the

manager... Did people just quit? Yeah, the entire

manager of the airport just quit. Oh, man.

Yeah, that's what it looked like. It looked like there was

a strike or there was something where like

they were expecting 100 workers

and 10 showed up.

Okay, I'm looking at it right now. Yeah, this

seems like a very, very, very bad scene.'s not i mean this all the all the car all the um bins for the tsa stacked up on top of each other there's no worse feeling than showing up to an airport and seeing that it's like a clusterfuck day and just being like, I don't know how I'm going to get out of here.

What would you do?

I would probably just go home.

I would leave.

I'd go home.

Yeah, I have left.

What if you had to be somewhere the next day?

Oh, I have TSA pre-check and clear, so I'd be fine.

I've left a baggage claim before and it's just taking too long.

And I've been like, okay, I'll come back and pick this up later.

But there's no more stressful place to be if you're already running late for something than at a busy airport after you land you just want to be teleported back home at that point this would drive me nuts okay good hot seat also i almost missed our plane on the way there that was i guess people i know we might have talked about it in the drunk episode uh my cool throne is our youtube channel okay people been asking this for a long time we started uploading the youtube uh video of this podcast in the morning. So you can listen to it.
You can watch it. We've given people the option.
Shout out to Liam and Evan memes behind the scenes. But we haven't talked about it on the show.
And I feel like we should get it out there. Get people on the YouTube channel watching the videos.
Yes. Monday was a perfect example.
A podcast you had to watch to see Hank's dead face. That's true.
Yeah, it was great. I mean, it was a great visual.
You have to admit, Hank, that the slow zoom-ins on your face were awesome. Where you were doing the Stephen A.
Smith pain meme. The picture was saying a thousand words at that point.
And Bubba being drunk himself trying to find me with the camera when he was like 12 feet away was so funny. Someone said it was.
I like that we do it when we do a podcast drunk. Everyone's drunk.
It's not like, oh, behind the scenes is sober and the guys in front of the camera. No, no, no.
We're all hammered. Someone said that he couldn't find you because you were blending in with the other colors of the walls that he also couldn't see.
Yeah, that's facts. So good.
Yeah. Go watch it.
Go subscribe to the YouTube channel, please. OK, PFT, your hot seat.
Cool throne. My hot seat is not having your free speech controlled online by egomanical billionaires at Twitter because that's a light one for today.
Elon Musk is coming to save it. Yeah so he's coming to save the day so uh elon musk is buying like nine percent of twitter right now and they're giving him a seat on the board i think he's just got so much money that he can literally buy anything i don't think that there's anything that he could not buy yeah why not if he didn't if he didn't want to so i think he's just like thinking about stuff in his day-to-day life that he uses.
And he just wants to buy everything that he uses. Yes.
Day, like sunup to sundown. So I think he's just going to make it easier for trolls online.
I think he likes trolls. He likes memes.
He likes trolls. I think this is good for us.
I saw a couple people being like, I am now going to deactivate my Twitter account for at least a week to protest. There we go.
That will show them. Yeah, no, I think it's good news for those of us that like to use Twitter to fuck around a lot.
Yeah. So, yeah, happy to see old Elon getting on board.
My cool throne is baseball because baseball really snuck up on us. Yep.
But it's back. Thursday is opening day tomorrow's opening day in baseball um very excited

to pay attention for the first couple weeks of the season the cmd express is coming back this year people have been asking about that i'm defending my second place crown um and i'm just i'm i don't know i feel like i say this every spring but like i'm i'm excited for baseball season this year yeah i am yeah why not Yeah. Why not? Are you? Yeah, sure.
I mean. I'm not.
A little bit. I get excited for baseball when it comes around, and then, you know, usually it's like baseball starts, for a week I'm pumped, then I'm going to watch hockey and basketball playoffs, and then I'll come back to baseball.
I think I'm excited because it got taken away from us for like a week. Yeah, I didn't really, that never really hurt me.
Was this like a big plan by Manfred to be like, we're going to make the fans think that they're not going to get a season and then they'll be so grateful? So happy. Yeah.
Yeah, no, I love, you know, opening day. I love when baseball does come back.
But yeah, that's usually the rhythm of like my watching is baseball comes back pumped. Then the playoffs start.
It's like, okay, let's watch the playoffs because those are kind of important. And then baseball comes back around June.
It's like, yeah, let's do it. Let's hop right in.
All right, my hot seat is Andy Dalton being a nice guy because he signed with the Saints. And Blake Bortles then asked to be cut because there was not enough room for Blake Bortles.
So I'm starting to rethink this whole Andy Dalton thing. Well, Blake was like, there's not enough room for two nice guys in this locker room.
Yeah. Bullshit.
But that just means that Blake's betting on himself. I hope he gets, yeah.
Hopefully someone will sign Blake. Let's keep him in the league.
Is there a spring game coming up for any, like, Big Ten school?

I know Clemson's got theirs on Saturday.

They should have Blake throw at halftime like Michigan did with Kaepernick.

Yeah, yeah.

Blake should be on a roster.

But Andy Dalton, what the fuck, dude?

Kind of a dickhead move.

Kind of a dickhead move.

Yeah.

And then my cool throne is Billy because we're back with Billy,

and he didn't do anything in New Orleans to make us mad at him. So good job, Billy.
Thanks, guys. Yeah, you did.
You didn't. Hogs for the cause, you didn't do anything.
Final four, you didn't do anything. Did you guys see the Burmese pythons on Burmese Street? We did, yeah.
Did you take any pictures of it? Was that the part you were most FOMO? Look, I had a lot of FOMO. That's why I left the group text.
I actually was totally cool with that move. I thought that was a- It wasn't.
I wasn't trying to- I hope you guys understood. It was just like FOMO.
No, you left the group text, and I was like, that makes sense. Why would you want to be on a group text where we're just planning things, and you're not there? Quick question.
Can I get added back now for- You already did you got added back this morning i did yeah yeah someone added you back this morning i think i have to opt back i'll figure that out you did a great job in new orleans perfect um but yeah thanks i did not get any pictures of the burmese pythons i i think they were in the background of a video that i was in at one point i mean the fact like you guys kind of wasted your whole trip you also did not get a picture with those pythons. They were big.
They were very big pythons. That's the point.
They're well-trained. I love that about you so much that we went to the Duke UNC and all this stuff.
You're like, but dude, did you see those Burmese pythons? Would you have let one of them strangle you? Well, they only strangle you if you give off fear. Right.
So if I was holding a wad of cash in front of you and i had the burmese python around your neck would you i'm i'm working on the cash fear i think i think we made huge steps and bounds immersion therapy agreed agreed uh all right billy your hot seat cool throne welcome back my hot seat we missed you i missed you guys too is uh uh plane travelers uh we had that that Manchester? No we had that time After the pandemic Where everyone was getting Kicked off of planes Because no one knew How to act in public We once again Have one of those stories They're kind of back A guy got kicked off Of an airplane For jerking off Four times And after the fourth They landed the plane Yeah Like two is okay Three you're pushing your luck four it's like we got to get everybody out we got to bring the hazmat team on to hose it down how long was this flight i need do you have the airline and the where it was going i think it was on spirit okay it was coming from florida on the way back from florida wait wait say that again it's just just flying around Florida. That actually makes us flying from Florida to somewhere up north.
Oh, okay. Wisconsin or Minnesota.
Spirit, though, you can jerk off on Spirit. You can absolutely jerk off on Spirit.
This guy has a completely reasonable case in court being like, you sold me a $29 ticket. I was going to jerk off.
And they'd be like, well, yeah, you're right. You know what? That's fair.
The way that Spirit operates, I think it's a $29 ticket and then there's a $60 surcharge if you want to pay to sit in the not getting jacked off on a section. Right.
So I stand with this guy. do spirit is spirit is the airline that if you take you're basically saying i'm like the amount i don't want to spend any money and i'm willing to just be like tortured for three hours to get to my destination also including a guy jerking off next to you also let's give the guy some credit here just from a medical standpoint to be able to do it four times on what i assume would be like a three and a half hour flight that's some impressive numbers yeah that is that's tough to pull off it's kind of showing off correction it was southwest oh okay seattle to phoenix okay changes everything put him in jail am i cool throwing you didn't have any part of that right well it was i think you were just assuming and naturally what you assumed would be what i would assume too that it would somehow involve florida and spirit or elision airlines that was at the end of my hot seat list my cool throne is saint peter's university so i went there on friday to see their elite eight appearance parade and it was really awesome to see the jersey city really embrace them i mean jersey city really as we spoke about earlier is in the shadow of new york city don't really you know get gets much shine much st peter's really brought a spotlight to that community and they celebrated their elite eight appearance with a parade and uh that probably is the lowest official finishing parade you think like fifth to eighth to eighth place at least.
I know Atlanta had a second place finish. And Cleveland had a last place 0-16 parade.
Yeah, they did have that. But it wasn't official by the city.
And that's like for charity too, I think. Right.
I'm totally fine. I think when your team makes a historic run.
Yeah. If you're a first time ever 15 seed gets the Elite Eight,'s that's a parade i think they deserve a banner there they deserve to remember this run for a long time yeah so do you think unc hangs up a banner probably not and also uh it would be cool though i'm for it doug edder and a couple of the other players have gone to the portal recently to transfer out of st peter's but honestly from how I saw the school embracing the team and hearing the mayor as well as the president of the school, athletic director talk.
Are you going to join the team? No. But I actually think they have a chance to become like one of these small school powerhouses.
A blue blood. Ends up going.
Gonzaga? Like a Gonzaga. Like seriously.
Like just like they'll make runs, but I don't know if they'll win. You know what they need? So the difference between St.
Peter's and Gonzaga is that Gonzaga has had millions and millions and millions of more dollars in funding going back like 40 years. And also NBA players.
They don't practice on like a pool. Right.
But now that the school has gotten, it has had such an increase in enrollment and increase. There's just a bunch of stuff they said in their speeches.
Do you think it does survive? That gave me good positive vibes. It's positive vibes.
Do you think, though, as a college basketball analyst, that it's not a good sign for after their first Elite Eight that their best players are now leaving the school? Along with their coach. Exactly.
Things to build on. But you know what? It was just good vibes.
Right away. It's good vibes.
It's good vibes. The school's like really, the student body

and sort of all the super fans there,

it was interesting.

Got some video. It'll probably

be coming out at some point

in some mode.

There we go, bro.

Just keep it as vague as possible.

No one gets expectations up.

It'll be in the future.

Some point, in some way. Yeah, sweet.
Might come out as a podcast. Shout out Peacocks.
Yeah. All right, Jake.
My hot seat is sign stealing. They approve technology for pitchers and catchers to use some devices so that they don't have to do the numbers.
Oh. Oh, is this getting out ahead of the Yankee letter that's going to be released? It's like, well now it's legal i disavow that by the way the yankees any any form of cheating what happens if the yankees were like on the cutting edge of cheating like twice as bad as the astros will they be the best cheaters i don't know then you have to support her confirm the cheat i won't support that there's no spin zone for that like a a microchip? Nice.
No, I think it's like a – what is it? They probably just took the Astros technology and then used it for this. Yeah.
Where it, like, buzzes your wrist or something. Yeah, I think it's something on the wrist.
But it's for the pitchers and the catchers and the pitching coach or the manager to communicate? It's like Frank frank abendale catch me if you can when they hire him because he knows all the loopholes they just had jose altuve and alex bregman sit with rob manford and be like how did you do this well so no it's yeah trying to figure out how to get around it so it's like a buzzing thing pad with buttons on the wrist of the gloved hand yeah that's pretty much'll do. Pitch type and location directly to the pitcher through a listening device.

Okay.

That's so weird.

That is crazy.

Are they going to have the green dot on their hats?

Mic'd up.

I don't know.

It should be interesting.

My cool throw in is menus.

It's a big week for menus.

Two at the Masters.

Oh, yeah.

We've got the OG menu, which is just showing how cheap everything is, which is awesome.

And then, have you guys seen Hideki Matsuyama's Champions Dinner Menu? Looks really good. Elite.
Ready? Appetizers. I'm done with food, though, but it looks good.
But it looks really good. Appetizers.
Sushi, sashimi, yakitori chicken skewers. The mains.
Miso glazed black cod and A5 Wagyu beef ribeye. Okay.
And then the dessert is Japanese strawberry shortcake. That sounds amazing.
That's like a perfect meal. Yeah, unbelievable.
And then obviously the pimento cheese. I've never had that, but $1.50.
Everything is under. The most expensive thing is $6, the white wine, Chardonnay.
Everything else is cheaper. Yeah, I'm done with food, but it does sound delicious.
Yeah. Yeah.
love looking at the Masters prices and just being like, ooh, I'd be able to eat everything for $25. I saw something online that said that they were starting to modernize the Masters a little bit.
I don't know if they're allowing cell phones this year. Yeah, it was Dude Perfect.
But yeah, Dude Perfect is modernized. Yeah, they're the breaking point of this entire thing.
But at some point in the future, they are going to allow cell phones.

I hope they never do that.

No, I agree.

I hope they go harder against cell phones.

I hope they actually have their own security staff arrest people that try to break the

cell phone rule.

Yes.

I like Augusta as it is.

Yeah, they don't even let you use a cell phone the week before and after.

Yeah, they have one of those electromagnetic pulses that goes off that just fries all your

electronics.

Yeah, I agree.

Keep the masters the masters.

All right, let's get to our interview, speaking of, with Max Homa, who's getting ready for

Augusta.

Before we do that, PFT, you had a quick word from one of our sponsors.

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That's B-E-T-T-E-R-H-E-L-P.com slash PMT. Here's Max Homa.
Okay, we now welcome on our very good friend and soon to be member of a Masters Making the Cut group. It is Max Homa.
He's getting ready for the we're gonna we're gonna air this right before the Masters start so let's let's just do a little quick like how we're feeling how how how everything's coming together can you really bounce off of this you know uh fortnight open victory and propel yourself to be someone who actually plays on Saturday and Sunday at Augusta? I mean, absolutely. You know, I've been the only thing that's made me nervous.
Golf game can't possibly feel better. The only thing that's made me nervous is for the first time in my life, I've kind of laid my nuts on the table and said I'm going to do something.
That's getting me a little, honestly, this is I don't know if it's quite up to up there with a pinky bet rush, but this is quite the rush now did you say you were going to make the cut before i just pretended that you said you were going to make the cut did i do that to you no i texted you that i was uh 100 making this that's right okay all right yeah and then i just said it out loud i said it out loud and put the pressure on you have a lot more of a following. And then you honestly have a lot angrier fans than I do.
So they're into it right now. So what's the stakes here? I don't think you can just say like your nuts are on the line unless.
Well, embarrassment. Yeah.
It could be my life because I think your AWLs might come after me like physically if I don't do this. I have to go play laser tag with Natalie's husband's kid yeah i think you should have to do that if you don't make the cut you should have to go where was that like north carolina or something that's too far i could probably make that happen i think that would be a very funny visual if you don't make the cut at augusta for you on sunday we get a picture of you playing laser tags with a bunch of seven-year-olds you'd never met in your life.
And that will give you like a humbling moment where it's like, hey, do you know how you can avoid this? Being better at golf, Max. Being better at golf.
I think that's a fair point. Those kids will not know it's coming, though.
There's going to be a lot of aggression on that Saturday morning. Honestly, that sounds like a lot of fun.
I don't know if they're ready for that. Playing laser tag.
You're like, what's his name?

Billy Madison when he's playing dodgeball, just lighting kids up.

They'll feel the wrath.

I did like your take, though, that we as adults don't play laser tag enough.

I agree wholeheartedly.

Laser tag is a great time.

We have these panic room things now, and that sounds terrible.

But laser tag is a very similar building construct.

I feel like we could just kind of keep that afloat a little bit better. Yeah.
The smash room you're talking about? No, laser tag. So the new escape rooms that they have, I'm pretty sure that they're only used for like corporate retreats.
You know those days where you still have to go to work, but they're like, we're doing a fun little wacky off-site thing today. We're going to go hang out in a small room together

and try to solve puzzles and pretend like we're

not annoyed. Was laser tag not a better way to build

your

work vibe and your team vibe?

That feels way better than an escape room.

Yeah, you solve your problems with

aggression. I'll just say it.

I think paintball is far superior to laser tag.

I know that paintball probably can't be played by

seven-year-olds, but my problem with laser tag

was always like the lasers, half the lasers

don't work, and then you're just stuck

Thank you. I think paintball is far superior to laser tag.
I know that paintball probably can't be played by seven-year-olds, but my problem with laser tag was always like the lasers, half the lasers don't work, and then you're just stuck. I feel like they never updated the technology.
Maybe I'm wrong. I haven't been in a laser tag place in like 10 years, maybe longer.
Remember when it first came out and it was like, holy fuck, this is next-level stuff, and it's like they hadn't fully figured out how to use the technology. So you're walking around with like an 80-pound pack and the lasers don't even like shoot right.
But they probably have fixed it. Think about that, though.
What you just said, you said that the technology wasn't great, essentially, and this has been 10, 15 years later. And think of how good technology is.
I mean, Jeff Bezos went to the what if we what if we incorporated new technology it could be it could be tremendous i'm down with that i'm down with that if we use our money instead of sending jeff bezos to play just the tip with the atmosphere to laser tag technology i'm cool with that i think it's more impressive to say like jeff technology has gotten so good that jeff bezos got laid that's that's like more more impressive than going into the atmosphere and then coming back in a parachute. That's pretty good technology.
It is. And as far as the laser tag situation goes, I think it's like, well, did you read the story that came out about Jim Harbaugh and going to play laser tag? Oh, yeah.
So Harbaugh is so competitive about laser tag that he was setting all the high records. He was like doing the high scores for his entire party in his group.
And they were trying to figure out how he was dominating people so bad. And it turns out he was just following the worst kid around and just standing next to him and letting his battery recharge and then killing him immediately.
I respect the hell out of Harbaugh for doing that. I respect and I'm not surprised after listening to his interviews on here and reading some stories about him, that makes a lot of sense.
I would have thought maybe he'd be a little bit more of a competitor and want to kind of pick on the best player, but I respect the grind regardless. Well, that's the Michigan way.
It's pretty much like scheduling the Little Sisters of the Poor back in 1901, and you win a national championship. Detroit YMCA.
They teach them how to play football, then they beat them. Max, I'm wearing the Italian soccer jersey in your honor today.
I wanted to get your feedback on your team. I guess the big news is you guys won the Euros, right? Congratulations, European champions.
Yeah, I watched so much of it. That one guy up at the front of the pitch, as we say, or the pitch uh in uh italian uh yeah he was really good he was dominant um a lot of passion uh carbo loaded obviously on pasta before from what the team told me and yeah i got the job done congratulations yeah what a team um so you have guaranteed that you're going to make the cut at the masters congratulations in advance for that thank you i'm curious because we curious because we're, you know, we kind of parachute in once a year to Augusta and we, you know, we talk about the azaleas, the fake bird sounds that they put in, the spray painted grass, all the stuff that we love about the Masters.
I'm curious from a guy that has played there, what is your favorite hole? Oh, my favorite hole. The 13th hole, because that's where all the azaleas are on the left and that's pretty awesome um but uh i mean gus is pretty it's pretty as far as the golf course goes it's pretty amazing uh just as far as like it's probably the only tournament you don't ever golf course you never have to go to and you feel like you know every uh every hole so that's pretty cool um but when you get in uh it's kind of sad you get to play the coolest golf course in you know the country at the very least and uh i don't i don't like get to sit there and appreciate it but my buddy taylor and i went three weeks ago um they did not track my flight there like they did tiger woods's yesterday but um or last week i guess because we're in the time machine uh but we went and it was cool to just go there and like i actually had a drink and uh like got to enjoy where i was um and i i came i left there thinking you know pretty lucky i get to come out to this golf course in three weeks and make the cut here and and see what it looks like on on a sunday of the golf tournament because i practiced the weekend of my practice round was Saturday and a Sunday, which was, I think that's good practice.
It's like kind of manifesting what will happen here in due time. I like that.
I like that. So wait, just from a noob side, like Pieti said, we parachuted in Augusta.
How many times do you actually get to practice? Like when will you go to Augusta?

And how many times do you get to actually practice

before you have to play in it?

Like is there enough time to figure some things out?

Or is it just, all right, we're showing up to Augusta every year

and we're just hoping that we do well?

I think they give us, once you qualify,

I think they give you like five rounds to go up there

and check it out on your own.

It's just not very similar to

when you actually play the tournament. They make it so much more difficult.
But then once I'll get

there Saturday of the tournament or the week prior to the tournament. So I'll practice Sunday out

there, Monday, Tuesday, and a bit on Wednesday. So you kind of get to get a pretty good feel.

It's just like any other tournament in a way with the practice. It's just a lot more important.
So it's tough. It's a really hard golf course.
So like learning it fast is hard. I've played one, the one that was in November and the golf course is nothing like what it is in April.
So that was kind of that's my excuse for why I missed the cut in both November and April because November one, I was used to watching it on TV, obviously. And I thought, you know, that didn't seem fair.
I didn't, you know, I didn't have any knowledge. And then the April one, I was tricked by the November one.
So this year, second April one, I feel like, um, I just, I know all of the things now. How, how like serious are the practice rounds when you do it? Like, how does it work? Do you go out with someone else? You obviously are with your caddy, but if you're on the 12th hole and you hit one in the water, do you say mulligan, then rip a bowl, and then get back right at it? How does that work? You actually nailed that, yeah.
The bowls are flying around Augusta. It's serious, but I, I play with the same crew mostly.
The only difference is we usually have a pro M on Wednesday. So we're, we have to play with, you know, a bunch of CEOs and people who are successful for their brains and, and, and actual like real success and not just hitting a golf ball round.
So we do that every Wednesday, but at the majors and obviously the masters, we do not. So we get a lot more time on the golf course so you end up playing um you know you get to play a little bit uh more loose with like only playing nine holes uh but I play with this similar crew I'm I'm hoping uh to play with Tiger Woods in a practice round this year that is that is my second uh most important goal of the week how would that work you just gonna text, hey, dude, you want, can I play with you? I heard through the grapevine that last year, obviously he ended up not playing, but after I won the golf tournament, he is the host of that.
His, you know, good friend, Fred Couples, who is my buddy, said like later, like kind of teased me later. He's like, oh yeah, we were all going to play a practice round together.
And obviously, you know and obviously you know tiger can't play this year and i was like well that's news to me and and and even more kind of devastating wow so i'm hoping i'm hoping i get that this year but it's i mean it's it's very serious what the prep but like i said we do it every week oddly enough so it's actually um it just becomes kind of kind of second nature how cool was it the first time that tiger woods came up to you and was like hey max how's it going like that he knew it was like pretty frightening honestly uh because i just didn't i i didn't know what to say or do i actually have a video of it uh without the sound but somebody randomly got a video of it um my caddy joe was like hey max you need to turn around right now and i'm like i was warming up for a tournament and i was like what are you talking about and i turned around and you just see like our god like walk like beelining at me and i'm thinking like what could he possibly be coming over here to do yeah and uh fortunately he uh did not you know do anything weird it was just he was being super nice and congratulating me on a tournament a few a month prior so uh yeah it's different tiger i don't know man i i always i kind of get made fun of for geeking out about tiger but it's just one of those things like watching somebody since i was six years old like dominate the sport i love uh it's hard not to get kind of uh i don't know kind of nerd out about it uh because it's weird i feel like it must be like what the kids you know felt like playing against michael jordan or something like when they got to the league it's just it's hard to uh comprehend and golf's easier because we play it so much longer yet we have the opportunity there are certain celebrities that even if you like you know do something like you're a professional golfer we interview athletes all the time there are certain people that no matter what you see them and you're like holy fuck like this is crazy this person is crazy and like i i only know a few that have really gotten me but like tiger it's it's getting less with tiger but it's still it's just still it's it's more weird like it's just you know the best player uh ever is is you i still get to compete against him uh but i met michael jordan Michael Jordan's the only person other than Tiger that I met, and that one floored me maybe more than Tiger Woods. Yeah.
Not to mention he's like really, really big, and that helps a little bit. My dog is going to town on her water.
What kind of dog you got? I got a yellow lab. Oh, can we see her? Oh, you bring her over did you now did you um adopt your dog or did you get it at a did you get it at a should i lie well i mean what no go ahead tell it so you did a a breeder i did a breeder so you you actually killed a dog when when getting that dog just so you know

yeah but honestly i really love her so i try not to think about that yeah no there's a dead dog right now with your name on it um i think i think my wife lacy has serious um kind of regret with that because almost every single day she follows some um of those like dogs that get killed in China.

Jesus Christ.

If it was up to her, we'd have 7,000 dogs.

What?

In my. follow some of those dogs that get killed in China.
Jesus Christ. If it was up to her, we'd have 7,000 dogs in my house.
Why following the dogs in China? Just follow Keith Olbermann on Twitter, and you can just be depressed for the rest of your life. I had to actually mute him, because he would go on these retweet sprees where it would be like 10 in a row.
Like, this dog will die in 30 minutes unless you personally adopt it.

I swear to God.

No, that is right.

It would be like, you have seven minutes to act.

It's like, dude, I'm at work.

It's a Wednesday.

What are you talking about?

Every time I see it, the thought does occur to me.

Like, I should get a cab to the shelter right now and go save this dog.

Just say that you donated to charity.

That's a good strategy because you're not going to get less people adopting those dogs. That's very true.
Are you like the rest of the golf world when they put the tweet out in the morning of the pin placement at Augusta where you look at it and you go through the holes? I guess it's kind of like what we would do when they announce the NFL schedule for the upcoming year be like okay win loss loss loss win win loss loss loss are you like okay I'm gonna birdie 13 uh 15 is gonna fuck me over and then 16 17 I can make up that stroke there yeah I mean I look at it for sure the Augusta or the Masters is cool because they have like so much uh their app or whatever uh week of you can watch other people play so i do that a little bit more but when i look through the pins it's always funny golfers we all think we can like control everything in our head before we play and i'm like oh yeah one that's easy it's you to back right like i'll be able to like you know hit one in there two oh yeah front left i'll be able to kind of work it over there and then like the first tall like snap snap hook went into the left trees and all of a sudden like my entire plan is just completely gone to shit so i'm trying a little more to just not really uh put too much into it uh before because um it's just honestly it's a waste of time because in my head i'm never gonna hit a bad shot and in reality i hit a lot of them yeah so it's uh i need to be a bit more realistic with my uh my visions of how the day is going to go we didn't mention i'm sorry that's a bad job by me you hit a hole in one you hit a hole in one in competition that was the first time you ever done that in competition correct yeah as a pro yeah it was nuts uh because it was like the hardest day ever and somehow it went in and uh it was uh that was very fun um it was uh one of those like holes in one are like the most uh I feel like they're like 90 percent luck like the more obviously the more good shots you hit the more opportunity the ball has to go in the hole but um like you're never really like aiming at the hole that often as a pro so like it's it's always like almost a miss if when it goes in uh so when it goes in, it's truly jarring. Yeah, what if you hit a beautiful five iron into a very significant breeze, and it bounces twice and goes right in? At that point, if you were to do that in competition, would you say that you would absolutely release an official statement after your round was over talking about it? If I was playing with Ernie Els and I beat Goodis and Ken Duke and somebody else without any strokes, without any handicap strokes, I would definitely write up a press release for sure.
I don't know if anybody would read it. How does that work, though? If it's an actual tour event and you hit a hole in one, is it expected? Do you have to buy people drinks in the clubhouse? Do you guys meet for drinks or is that just something us amateurs do? That locker room, they just built a new one at Bay Hill.
They actually do have a bar now. So I went in and sat with the guys and paid for some drinks.
I bought the media members drinks for Sunday when they had to do all the, you know, all the all the questioning of people who played better than me. And then I hadn't made one in so long.
I went on a spree. I just started Venmoing my friends like money here and there.
And I was like, have fun, get a drink. And that was my that was my form of making sure that I kept up with the weirdest tradition in sports, that the person who does something good has to spend asinine amounts of money

after their favorite moment.

I think that's a good – I mean, listen, when I win a big bet or something,

it's like I throw it around left and right.

Let's go out.

So it's good karma.

I didn't make like a direct amount of money from the hole-in-one.

I would imagine you'd get like a car. probably just you're probably not no you just probably forgot you probably walked off and forgot because you're so not used to like oh no you're playing on a monday that was on a monday right no no no no no that was on a saturday that was a weekend okay all right yeah so you okay all right yeah but you did have a monday what was that day that you had that you were the lowest uh player that day and everyone was freaking out on twitter players championship second lowest score but it was on a monday and i looked and it was like everyone was freaking out and tagging me in tweets being like dude you got to talk about max he's going off i looked up it's like you're like in 10th place like you're still a loser they overreacted they really overreacted uh that was but don't put that on me that was that was their bad they were excited i i don't i don't uh often make runs that was that was our fifth major that was nearly the masters so i think they were just excited to see see me uh play through the entire weekend even more golf into monday uh it was a it was a triumph of spirit on my on my part if i do say so myself.
And yeah, so I think that was the excitement from everybody. It was a little overreactive, but it's okay.
It was a crazy run, and I should give you credit. I was more joking, obviously, but it was funny when I looked and I was like, oh my God, he's about to win the players.
And I looked, I was like, wait, is it 10th place? But yeah, you went, what did you have? I'm looking at it right now. You had eight birdies in your final round? Oh, yeah.
Damn. Birdies were, they were flying around that joint that day.
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Shady rays giving out their best deal of the season. Shadycom slash pmt 50 off two or more pairs of polarized sunglasses shady rays.com slash pmt now here's more max um uh have you um have you like had any assistance in playing augusta because you've played it in video games so many times uh a hundred percent but again it goes it goes kind of to my problem where on the video game, I very rarely don't hit a really good drive and a really good second shot.
And then they literally typically show you about what you need to do on the putt. So I need to maybe if I could harness that ability or that kind of.
It feels so easy on a video video game i need to like almost trick myself into thinking that yeah but i have played i've played it a lot on video games what you could do is you could just create a new character and make your new character really shitty and then you could play augusta on like the the highest difficulty level that way when you play it in real life it's like oh this isn't so hard this is a lot easier where they like build their actual character and like myself i'd be like okay good at irons like chipping i'm not really gonna give myself very much like can we write like streaky uh i wonder if anybody does that because i think everyone just says oh yeah i bomb it like i'm the longest guy of all my friends yeah 99 across the board that's the only way to play video games um all right so i'm listen i don't want to ask a mean question but i did ask this question last time about can you win the masters your odds now are actually like they're 100 to 1 so it's still like holy shit this would be an insane story and everyone would be like how could this possibly happen and? And maybe like half the field got hit by a meteor, but you're still, you're a hundred to one. You're now, you're not the bottom.
So do you feel like you could win the masters? Yeah, a hundred percent. I would, I would, if I was you, I'd argue if I was a hater of myself, I'd argue that I had a better chance at last year's masters when COVID was a lot more prevalent and COVID not a meteor could knock out quite a few players.
Right. Unfortunately, I did not get that done last year when I, I feel like I might've had my best shot.
But maybe there will be some new, maybe some people will get into some bad lettuce. bad lettuce yeah knock a few guys out a few of the top guys um but yeah there's definitely a world where i can see myself winning the masters okay so i mean we're going baby steps we're going to make the cut this year and i want everyone congratulating max to the moon if he makes the cut because it's going to be a great moment and then maybe next year we win the whole goddamn thing.
Yeah. I think I definitely like the baby steps, and I definitely need to accomplish one goal.
But I'm coming off of a made cut at my last major sometime last recently, last September or August, somewhere back then, maybe even July. So I'm streaking at the moment.
So people aren't putting a lot of that into, into the momentum I'm feeling, but they're just missing out. I've been, I've been reeling off that for a while, which has been a, that's been huge for my prep.
Well, we, we asked the question somewhat jokingly on Monday's show, would you be the worst player in the history of golf to win the masters? but we identified other players that would have been worse than you.

So I don't think it's – it's not unreasonable to think that you could win, right?

Like if you play your very, very best golf and the course,

the pin placements are all right in your – if they don't max-proof Augusta

and you play at like 110% of your capability, you could win.

I think they're probably thinking that right now to August. How do we max group this? We don't get the worst player to ever win the Masters.
I'd like to think that all those guys in their jackets are doing that at this moment. I would say that you would be the funniest guy to ever win the Masters.
Not Patrick Reed. Oh, yeah, Patrick Reed.
Yeah, reed's definitely funnier than you i definitely had thought about that you know i i a lot of people sit around and say what's your goal and you know goals in life and dreams and aspirations and mine was to be the funniest golfer to ever win the masters um and i feel like that'd be a huge honor they're big in humor uh there in the post uh post-round speech at Augusta National. They love jokes.
So I'll see how that fits. That'd be a huge moment for the Masters, I think.
Yeah, and for comedy, really. Like the first comedian to win.
What about your pre-round meals? What do you have for breakfast? Let's just say that you're teeing off at, I don't know, 8 a.m.

Do you have a big breakfast to carry you through that day,

knowing that you're not going to be able to eat for a while?

I try.

I struggle, especially when I'm a bit nervous to eat a lot in the morning.

So I try and choke down some eggs or an omelet or something.

I usually get one piece of bacon because I'm half Jewish and don't want to just dive all the way into the pork game uh yeah i uh i i fortunately i just bring a bunch of snacks on the course i'm more of like one of the what do they say you eat like a bird like a lot of i just picket stuff all day yeah try to keep myself going but i have never uh i've never been a good breakfast eater yeah no one's no one's to me, so I don't really understand that saying. To the cat's point, you could just hit the bowl out on the course, make yourself a little bit more hungry.
I don't know if that's in the rule. I'll read the rules this year.
If you win, you should smoke a bowl of Augusta grass. You should just be like, no weed, just pack it up, light it on fire.

That would be sick.

You'd be a legend for that.

Tremendously hard.

Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

Do you want to talk about your Lakers?

I don't, but I will.

I've been enjoying the hell out of this season.

They actually, so at the time of this taping,

they lost by like 50 points to the Mavericks on national television. They are right now out of the playoffs.
Would you say LeBron's time in LA has been a complete bust? Because we don't count the Mickey Mouse Championship. And do you, as a Lakers fan, feel disgraced because you basically threw Kobe aside and started loving LeBron more than you ever loved Kobe and that's disgusting well that that is that that I'm all in on the jokes but the last one dude Laker fans if you say that they they get very upset that one hurts my soul Kobe Bryce my favorite athlete ever um so the the the very real championship we won that was that was fantastic uh where was that where they win that they they in a bubble uh somewhere in orlando oh and sounds like where mickey mouse lives is that epcot he he rents there i don't i don't i don't think you guys know mickey very well mickey is all over the place he you know he's he's lived everywhere uh so it'd be unfair to just lock him down to one city.

Okay.

It has been tough.

I'm not going to lie.

It's been hard defending it because, obviously,

it's a pretty big stage out there in L.A. and they are getting absolutely crucified for good reasons at times.

LeBron has still been really good.

I feel like he's not getting a lot of – he gets a lot of the criticism,

although he does give himself quite a decent amount of praise. He's not getting a lot of he gets a lot of the criticism although he does give himself

quite a decent amount of praise.

He's not in any of the tweets

when they lose. How can that be the criticism?

Is he not in the tweets?

His picture is never used in the losing

tweets by the Lakers main account so I don't

know how would you even know that he was part

of a loss. Maybe he

never has lost. Maybe that's the

spin zone. LeBron has never lost.

The Lakers have lost a few

games. It's been tough.
They just

Let's go. of a loss um maybe he never has lost maybe maybe that's the spin zone lebron has never lost well here's the lakers have lost a few games it's been tough they just they just kind of they're not gelling at all um this is late march by the way like the not gelling in when there's nine games left in the season enough reps together um yeah i i will say this i've become friendly with uh alex caruso yes and i do feel like he was the glue and i don't know how to prove it other than the very real championship that they won uh and he was on that team uh and of course he went uh to your beloved chicago boats i do have a question for you big cat i was thinking of just in case this came up and just a way to rebuttal that a little bit.
Would you have traded right now, would you have traded my close personal friend Aaron Rodgers winning the Super Bowl this year to not have Coach K make this run in March Madness? No, no. So the way I put it is my hatred for Coach K is a five alarm fire.
My hatred for Aaron Rodgers is literally the sun, the surface of the sun. So it's not even close, like not even close.
This has been miserable for me. And by the time this airing, we'll know the result.
But yeah, no, I hate Aaron Rodgers. And the fact that you're friends with him, I mean, that says a lot about the character that you have.
I hope that – are you vaccinated? Are you immunized? What's up with you? Oh, I don't – I just leave that up to the media to decide. Well, then you are friends with Aaron Rodgers.
Good call. That's HIPAA.
Yeah. That was a HIPAA violation.
I'll go back to the next Tuesday and let you know. You could also say for the spin zone with LeBron, his ankle injury is horrible.
He said after the game, like, my ankle right now, it's horrible. It's basically broken.
Yeah. I mean, okay, listen, I'm all in on all that.
Kobe Bryant, again, my favorite, would never say that. I get that.
But, like, to be fair, it looks pretty bad. He did roll there is video evidence suggesting clap the ground yes i think the side of his leg touched the ground as he was standing up um yeah i would have played yeah i would i would just tighten my shoes a little bit more yes i mean that that's a that's a fair that's a fair point that like maybe some other people would have played like you big cat you can't judge your pain tolerance to someone else's yeah you're right that's not fair no true warrior no true soldier would ever get taken out with something as minor as like an ankle or a heel injury that just doesn't happen historically i've never heard of that uh so um you got the masters coming up you've you've talked about how it feels like you get a little bit nervous On the days that Like before you play At what point do you settle down when you're out on the course Is it like Because we were talking to Brooks about this a couple years ago And he says that at some point he gets bored on the course Around hole what like 9 And he blacks out between holes 9 and 13 or 14 Do you have like a a spot where you consistently find yourself settling in and you're no longer nervous? Yeah, it's very similar to that.
I would say typically after the first hole, your nerves kind of calm down, especially if you just make a very easy par. And then it kind of dissipates.
And then when you get to like 16 if you're playing well, which I do so often, those nerves kick back up, especially on the weekend. So it's like that middle ground board.
I wouldn't use the word board for myself. It can still be a bit chaotic.
So I got to keep my attention. But yeah, for the most part, I don't get I don't I don't have like the full nerves all day i just have them geez i just get them uh here and there so uh it definitely beginning of the day end of the day get that's where it's the worst but that's where it's like the most fun especially the end of the day the beginning can be a bit uh annoying because the mornings feel like they take a while but once that goes away one hole and it usually kind of kind of drops down and one one other thing I always wonder about Augusta is the caddy uniforms.
I love them. They're like painting outfits.
They look like they're like the Walter White in Breaking Bad, like he's going to go out there and cook meth or something. And the caddies get numbers on their uniforms.
What's the process like, and is there a specific number that your caddy likes to wear? His favorite number is 22. The process is when you check in.
And so when you check in, whatever order that is, well, the guy who won last year gets number, his caddy gets number one. And then everybody just whatever order you check in.
I tried desperately because I knew about what day I was coming in, about what area the number was going to be. And I was trying desperately for 69, and I think I got 54.
So I was not even close. But I had this feeling.
I was like, this is the year. But Joe wants 22.
That's his lucky favorite number. All right, so we've got to get him 22.
All right, so I had one last question. It's the rowback question.
We're going to send you some Q-zips and polos. You've got to come to New York.
Are there majors coming up in New York? Isn't there? We have one in Boston so I can pop over. Yeah, or Wingfoot? Do you play in Wingfoot? I don't know.
That was a couple years ago. Yeah, Bethpage? I popped in that week.
Bethpage Black? I don't know. Whatever.
One of those majors. Look at yours.
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My last question is, for the people, now we have fun because, you know, we bust balls, but we are truly rooting for you. So for the people, the AWLs and everyone rooting for you, what does Thursday look like where we're like,

okay, this is feeling good versus Thursday's bad.

Let's change our plans here.

Everyone get ready because Max is going to miss the cut yet again.

I wish I knew, man.

I wish I knew what would guarantee uh, what would guarantee, uh, that even at the start of Thursday, I, I, I would like to say that if I go out there kind of bogey free through nine holes, uh, maybe one, two under through nine, that would be a great sign. Uh, would mean I'm in control.
Um, but man, uh, I've done some dumb things in my life, my golf life especially,

that would warrant anything being – I would just wait until Friday afternoon

to feel real comfy.

Okay.

Let's do this then.

How about on Thursday when you finish your round and you're on 18,

if you feel good – and you don't have to do it, but if you feel good,

maybe after you go pick up your ball, you do a little hat flip so the people know like okay we're feeling okay yeah i think that's not a bad idea on on 18 i would do a little flat hat hat flip yeah just let us know that like yeah like that was good but let's keep the positive vibes going into friday everyone be on alert yeah like nobody panic but panic, but like, you know, things are progressing. I also want to just throw this out there to all the listeners.
It's positive vibes only for Max starting the minute you hear this. All the way until – let's just start with all the way until Friday afternoon.
Positive vibes. Nice things tweeted at him.
Just like, you know like puppy dogs, could be from a breeder like Max, could be saving a life from an actual pound, whatever. Whatever it is, positive vibes only to Max for those two days so we can get him to Saturday and Sunday.
And then when he gets to Saturday and Sunday, just light him up. Just fucking be the meanest person to be.
Look at it this way if you positive vibes only through Friday then it would mean that we all made the cut overcame astronomical odds and then Saturday Sunday just go back to being mean and make a buggy tell me I'm the worst I could totally deal with that but get me through Friday you know what would be great if you missed the cut on Saturday you should adopt a dog from a shelter in Augusta. And then it's like, guess what? If I had made the cut, this dog would have died.
Yeah. Yeah.
Okay. That's good.
I hope they're not listening to that because I hope that there's no psychopath out there that might actually hold all that to me. But I like that idea.
I probably need to run that one by my wife. But if I know my wife, she will immediately agree to that.
Okay, so good. So you got a dog.
And also, Bogey would be a great name for a puppy. Maybe double Bogey for doing it for Max's house.
For you two of them. It's double Bogey.
Alright, well, Max, best of luck for real. And again, everyone's got to be positive.
We're sending him, like, even if he fucks up on Thursday or Friday, it's like, hey, you'll get the next one.

Good job, Max.

Keep going.

Saturday, we're back.

Yeah, right.

Exactly.

Because it is nice to go on Twitter and just see people say nice things about you.

So over the top, the nicest things.

I can't imagine anything better on that app to have some nice stuff being said.

We'll lead from the front.

You have our word.

I'm sure you will. All right.
Thanks, Max. Talk to you later, man.
Good luck. Bye, boys.
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All right, let's wrap up.

We got guys on chicks.

Hank, why don't you get us going?

Guys on chicks.

Let's do it.

Let's do it.

Are you feeling okay about reading right now?

My brain is mush.

Do you want to tap in, Bubba?

My brain is so fried.

What's up, boys?

Especially dad bod cat.

Oh, it's just straight up fat ass. Obese.
It is. You should shave the mustache.
No, you jerk. You know what? I'll shave my whole face if you shave yours.
No. Exactly.
Okay. Why don't guys like eating boneless wings? I order pizza pretty often, and on the Pizza Hut app, you can redeem points for free boneless wings.
But my husband insists on paying for traditional wings because boneless wings are for children. Do guys just enjoy hot sauce all over their fingers? Plus, you get more meat with boneless, don't you? I don't understand why it's such a big deal.
For me, I personally like to look at what I've accomplished after I'm done eating wings. That's part of the fun for me is to look at like the graveyard of chicken arms that I've just been able to eat.
And I can count how many I've eaten. That's fun.
That's fun for guys. I like boneless wings.
I like regular wings more. Boneless wings are when you just don't want to put in the effort.
You know what I mean? Like if you're just, hey, sometimes it's nice to get a blowjob instead of have sex kind of thing. Like, I don't want...
You know what I mean? Like, I just want to be able to eat this. I don't have to deal with bones.
I don't have my hands all gross. Like, sometimes it's just nice, right? Also, we forgot to mention, Stanford Steve, maybe the most alpha move ever when we got wings, he ordered a side of buffalo sauce.
And, like, they brought it in, like, a soup container. And he was dipping his wings for more buffalo sauce, which I liked.
It's a solid move. It's aggressive, though.
He was coming at Billy's neck. Oh, Billy, yeah, he was.
Boneless wings are slow-twitch muscles, and bone-in wings are fast-twitch muscles. Got it.
In terms of on the chicken. Yeah.
Yeah, okay. Does.
But I. Does that correlate? Like if you eat more boneless, does that help you? I think it has more higher mineral density.
I don't trust anyone who goes all boneless all the time. I think it's one of those things that you just do every now and then like as a change of pace.
Yeah. I mean, to me, boneless wings are just chicken nuggets.
Yeah. They're chicken nuggets with sauce, which is fine.
It's not a problem. I don't look at them as being wings.
Correct. It's like my culture is not your costume when you try to call them wings.
What's up, boys? I recently offered to treat my boyfriend of a few months to dinner at a local steakhouse. He ordered an appetizer, the most expensive steak, and four drinks.
Yes. He then asked if I would treat to ice cream.
Yes. I said yes because I really really like him but i have an average job and other things to take care of do i just never offer again they're telling me as to keep it to a minimum thanks boys that is kind of a dick move he just went most expensive thing on the menu because like steakhouse is one of those things where if you specifically order the most expensive steak you're kind of an asshole for that like Like if someone who like in this situation if it was like you know maybe like a business thing where it's like oh it's on the corporate card but there's always that one steak that's like 150 dollars the one that like yeah that salt bay personally prepares for so what what he should have done is he can order the expensive steak he can get the appetizers he can do the drinks but instead of ordering the ice cream at the restaurant, he should just be like, no, you know what, we've got stuff at home.
That made you stick around while he makes you pay for an extra dessert, and then he'll just stop by the grocery store, pick up ice cream on the way home, and that's his contribution to dinner. It just would have been nice for him to think about that.
I was just thinking about this because if you go out to dinner with your girlfriend's parents, maybe the first time you meet them, what is it? What would you say? Third most expensive steak is where you have to, that's the ceiling? My rule is you go one level beneath what her dad orders. Right, but what if you order first? No, you don't.
But what if? No, you don't. What if he literally says, you order first? I for i would hold my breath and die all right so that would be worse than ordering the most expensive it's very important to be like to let them establish the baseline he keeps on saying i'm not ordering until well i'm not gonna it looks like we're just gonna be in a standoff mr x um what are you gonna say billy me and your daughter listen for suggestions what if there's a suggestion thrown out there, like, this is good here.
Yeah. I think the third or fourth most expensive steak, there's just always that feel.
You have to judge who you're with. If you're out with someone who maybe can't afford a super expensive steak, just don't be that guy.
Yeah. There's really good steaks that aren't the most expensive steaks.
Don't order the special, either. Right.
Right. What's up, Big Daddy Cat, Short King PFT, and famed Duke alumni Hank? My boyfriend and I live in LA and have been dating for around three years.
He's great. I'm 22.
He's 24. He has a job.
He's clean. He's funny, and our sex life is great.
He's clean. There's one problem, though.
That's good. I've recently stopped smoking weed, and he's still smoking at least twice a day.
We've had discussions about it, but whenever I bring up the fact that he should at least try to cut back, he just replies, smoke weed every day, and laughs. Is there merit to my argument, or should I not care because sometimes I want to go out and do things, not just sit around with a stoner? Yeah.
I mean, there's some merit to it. But on the other hand— But if you were smoking before, when you of this was you got too good for him yeah this you think you're better than him you kind of pulled out the rug on him yeah like he's not he thought like he definitely went around being like yeah my girlfriend's so sweet we smoke pot all the time it's awesome she just gets me the next thing you know you're being a narc on his ass like if he got into crossfit and then started pressuring like you know you can't that's something else that happens i feel like sometimes people get super in an exercise it's like i didn't sign up for this yeah the um i would say i mean there's definitely the people who smoke so much that it's their entire personality if that's the case i think you probably have to break up yeah it's not gonna work like you can't have somebody that's stone cold sober and somebody that's like high all the time it's buddha ben buddha ben needs a well he's building but he's a buddha babe yeah that understands him and gets him correct but you can't you can't pair up like a stone cold sober person with that because the personality is just you don't align right so it's he also has a really good comeback every time you tell him to stop which is just saying smoke weed every day yeah there's really nothing you can say to that maybe just smokes a little less weed he's gonna be fine yeah just don't smoke in the morning but yeah this does feel like this is headed for a collision course it sounds like you like want to go out and do stuff and he's like uh should we watch avatar for the 75th time maybe just switch him over to Sativa instead of Indica.
Get him outside, go for a hike. I like that.
My boyfriend and I had been dating for two and a half years. When we started dating, he had been broken up with his ex for a year.
I noticed very quickly that the Spotify playlist we always use had a cover photo of his ex-girlfriend. Uh-oh.
Note, you can't really see her face because she's pointing at the logo on her hat, which is actually his hat that she's wearing. But it's obviously her.
I never said anything because I didn't want to come off crazy, and I knew the relationship was over. Two years later, we use this playlist occasionally, so the pic still pops up.
My friends say they are shocked I never confronted him or asked him to change it. Should I have been upset and asked him to change the picture when we started dating? Should I ask him to it now no no you're cool like if you're confident in your yourself and you trust your boyfriend it's a it's a nothing burger it sounds like she's only upset because some of her friends got upset about it yeah that's a nothing burger in my mind if you're if you are like i said confident in yourself trustworthy of your boyfriend healthy relationship nothing burger i also think that the quality of the playlist matters here too it sounds like it's a banger yeah so keep bringing it up yeah it's true so maybe that part like because then it's like oh man this is our like i mean if it's like your fuck playlist and yeah definitely change it but i i think you're i think you're doing the right thing don't listen to your friends be be yourself all right last one this is a good one big cat and the rest of the crew i'm currently seven months pregnant with my boyfriend and my my boyfriends and my first child before the tournament my boyfriend made me choose 64 potential names that he then proceeded to rank and put in a bracket form love it we know we're having a girl as the college teams moved on, so did our names.
I thought it was a fun little joke, but now... Love it.

Why not?

Yeah.

What is the name?

What one?

Okay, so my problem with this is if you agreed to this you have it's legally binding you shouldn't have done this like if i had if i had proposed this it would have been shot down immediately which is the normal thing to do like we're not naming our child off of a completely random tournament but you agreed to it and now guess what your only recourse here is have another kid and then you get to name that kid it sounds like maybe though he kind of just did it and was like oh babe look i'm doing this funny little bracket thing yeah and she's like i'm seven months pregnant i'm just trying to like yeah get this baby out whatever go watch the tournament and now that now it's coming to a head both of my children to figure out a name. You kind of got to meet them first.
Yeah, it's weird to just set them up with a name and then have it not fit. I'm curious to know what the name for Kansas was.
It had to be one that he liked going into it because they were a one seed. Ask yourself this.
Cerulean? Was it Cerulean? This is, shout out the boy. The boy uh ask yourself this if your name if a name you liked had won would you have would you have been cool with the system and if that's true then i think it's tough shit you got to just deal with it and then have another kid and you get to name it like save this for your back pocket when you have another child you can be like remember when we did your stupid system i'm getting to name this kid that's i think that's all you got and it's also kind of a cool story like i got named after kansas there was a floorboard that was loose under armando baycott's foot and that's how i ended up with my name yeah i mean that's really like you have to take your hat off to the guy he's trying to be a dad he.
He's trying to contribute to the pregnancy and birthing process.

But us guys, sometimes we just have to put things in bracket format to really appreciate them.

So he tried.

Yeah.

All right, numbers.

And then sleep.

25.

8.

22.

6.

Hank, what's that look?

I might just start again.

One. Okay.
He just start again. One.

Okay, he's starting again.

The use.

You have to say it.

69.

Seven.

If it catches, didn't catch, we're still going. We had a false one.

We're still going. Numbers stay real.
If you had guessed seven, you got a bad beat there. Who dinged up 71, by the way? Uh-oh.
73. Got a little assist there.
Yeah. Machine's almost two years starting to...
Might have to get a new one. Fourth time.
Fourth time, okay. Love you guys.
Bobcats are killing invasive Burmese pythons in the Everglades. Love you guys.
Is that a good or bad thing? Good. Pythons are trash.
you Thank you. It's like a good time.
I'll be coming for your lover. Take on me.
Take me on. I'll be gone.
In a day of change. Needless to say.
I won't say set in But I'll be stolen away Further learning But life is okay Say after me It's not better to be safe than sorry Say after me It's not better to be safe than sorry Take on me you Take me out. The day of death.
Just to play my worries away You're all the things I've got to remember You're shying away I'll be coming for you anyway You're shying away I'll be coming for you anyway Take on me Take me on me. Take me on.

I'll be gone.

In a day. I'll be

gone

in a I'll be

in a day

day of me