Justin Thomas, CM Punk, Joe Burrow Is Back & NFL Week 4 Preview

Speaker 1 Hey, pardon my take, listeners. You can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube.

Speaker 2 Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music.

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Speaker 1 On today's part of my take, we have a two-fur for the people. Justin Thomas, straight off his Ryder Cup victory.

Speaker 1 Great interview with him, catching up on the golf world,

Speaker 1 talking about the Ryder Cup. And then we have CM Punk in studio.
In studio. A little teaser for the people.
CM Punk said some things that could end up in the news because he told us some stories.

Speaker 1 Yeah, the news.

Speaker 1 We have week four NFL preview, Thursday night football, PFT's iStream, which was electric.

Speaker 1 And then we have Fantasy Lads and Firefest.

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Speaker 7 At participating, McDonald's. Okay,

Speaker 1 let's go.

Speaker 1 Now in the street, there is violence.

Speaker 1 And then a lot of soft work will be done.

Speaker 1 No place to hang out or washing.

Speaker 1 And then I can't game all on the sun. Oh, no, we're gonna rock it down to E-Lay, Trick.
I rend you.

Speaker 1 And then we'll take it higher.

Speaker 1 Oh, we're gonna rock it down to E-LA.

Speaker 4 It's part of my take.

Speaker 1 Isn't it about Marshall Sports.

Speaker 1 Welcome to part of my take, presented by Dave and Busters. Go check out a Dave and Busters right now.

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Speaker 1 Friday, October 1st.

Speaker 1 And Billy, did you get a haircut?

Speaker 7 I actually was trying to shave my head.

Speaker 1 Are you serious?

Speaker 7 You blew it. Is this serious?

Speaker 1 Is that serious?

Speaker 7 No, he's telling the joke, but he wasn't ready for it.

Speaker 1 He wasn't ready.

Speaker 7 He has a new joke, but he wasn't ready for it. He had to compose himself.

Speaker 1 And then he said, We have to talk about PFT showing his eyes, and I still led with this because I wanted to give you your... Wait, wait, wait, Billy.
Don't say it.

Speaker 7 Don't say it. Don't say it.
Stop talking, Billy.

Speaker 1 All right, let's do it.

Speaker 1 All right, here we go. Three, two, one.

Speaker 1 Welcome to part of my take presented by Dave and Busters. Today is Friday, October 1st.
And Billy, did you get a haircut?

Speaker 7 I was halfway through shaving my head and I chickened out.

Speaker 7 That's his joke. That's his new joke.
God damn it. That's the joke.

Speaker 1 I think it's

Speaker 1 gives the people what they want. Oh, you want the hits? Yes.
Play the hits.

Speaker 1 Billy, did you... All right.

Speaker 1 2-1.

Speaker 1 Welcome to part of my take presented by David Busters. Go check out David Buster's more ding-ding-ding ding ding ding ding.
Today is Friday, October 1st. And Billy, did you get your haircut?

Speaker 7 No, I dyed the tips invisible.

Speaker 1 Yeah!

Speaker 4 Save your line, Bart. there we go

Speaker 1 Dude, you got to just go with your line over and over.

Speaker 7 I could have just gone like cut all of them, you know Yeah, all right. I like that Billy's so committed to the stolen valor lifestyle that he got the Marine Corps haircut.
That's nice.

Speaker 7 I get one haircut a month and it's gonna be close.

Speaker 1 Yes. All right, and I'm always gonna ask you for a while.

Speaker 7 I thought you got all of them

Speaker 1 Yeah

Speaker 1 All right Let's talk some real stuff. We had Thursday night football.
We had a stream that was electric. PFT showed his eyes.

Speaker 7 Yeah, I dumped the girls out. I went freeballing freeballing tonight, big cat.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it was. So if you didn't watch, go watch.
Go subscribe to our YouTube on part of my take, part of my take YouTube, because PFT might flip out the eyes at any moment. You never know.

Speaker 7 You think people are going to be able to tell when we're doing the show and when the girls are out and when they're back in?

Speaker 7 Let's see. No,

Speaker 1 don't say.

Speaker 7 Right. Yeah.
I'm going to say three words. Yeah.
And then without looking before the YouTube comes out, reply to the original part of my take tweet. And we should put up a poll.

Speaker 7 Which one was three words? Okay, ready? I'm going gonna say uber

Speaker 7 chowder

Speaker 1 patriots okay tell us which one tell us which one but it was electric it was actually awesome the awls were incredible uh 305 we were trying to get between 305 and 306 000

Speaker 1 and for two minutes and we were like a minute and a half in and it got all the way down to 30502 305 held the line

Speaker 7 we held diamond hands the awls have diamond fucking hands and i appreciate it But it's not weird.

Speaker 1 No, it's not weird. It's just normal now.
Yeah, it's just normal. So he'll sometimes have them on, sometimes have them off.

Speaker 7 Normalize, normalize, normalize.

Speaker 1 Yes, exactly. Put that down.
Write that down. Write on his...

Speaker 1 You should just walk around. Maybe have it as your license plate or a tattoo.

Speaker 7 Bumper sticker, Pinterest dream board.

Speaker 5 Yeah, whatever.

Speaker 1 You name it.

Speaker 1 We did have some football. It was actually a very good game.
Trevor Lawrence has officially arrived in the NFL.

Speaker 1 He played very well.

Speaker 7 He played well. He played well.

Speaker 1 No, I think this was officially his first game.

Speaker 7 He feels like a Thursday night quarterback. But I do want to say to all the people being like, Bengals, Jaguars, ooh, who's watching that? Fuck you.
I say it every year. Yeah.

Speaker 7 If you don't love me at my Bengals Jaguars, you don't deserve me at my Bucks Patriots.

Speaker 1 You can say, though, like I say, the game stinks, but I'm still going to watch every second and enjoy it.

Speaker 7 Yeah, and you know what? Usually the games that we think are going to suck on Thursday nights, they end up being pretty good, with the notable exception of last week of Mills Mafia. Yes.

Speaker 7 We were wrong about that.

Speaker 1 We were very wrong about that.

Speaker 1 I thought Trevor Lewis played well. It seemed like they were running Clemson's offense.

Speaker 1 I think he had two rushing touchdowns and one rushing touchdown.

Speaker 1 I mean, it wasn't like wow stats, but he didn't throw an interception.

Speaker 7 No, he played well. He didn't.

Speaker 1 He played well. Joe Burrow played great.
Joe Burrow looked awesome. His drive to tie the game was incredible, the drive to win with the field goal.

Speaker 1 My biggest question here is, Urban Meyer, what are you doing, dude?

Speaker 7 Urban Meyer doesn't like coaching football. It was pretty apparent.

Speaker 7 Like, in the first half, on a first down, the Bengals get a first down, and Urban Meyer just doubles over with his hands on his knees. I think he might be dead right now.

Speaker 7 He just, he looks like he's miserable out there all the time. I don't know why he does it to himself.

Speaker 1 Well, here's what I'm confused about. So, Urban Meyer, at the end of the half,

Speaker 1 like, basically kind of changes the momentum. The Jaguars have a chance to go up 21-0.
They get stopped at the goal line. I like the aggressiveness, okay? You're an 0-3 team.

Speaker 1 You're trying to get your first win. You're playing a great half.
Step on their throats. Score.
Go into the halftime 21-0. Pretty difficult to come back from 21-0 down.
So that's aggressive.

Speaker 1 That's good. That's an 0-3 team trying to get their first win.
Flash forward, you get to the fourth quarter, fourth and four at the 50 with five minutes left. You punt and you never get the ball back.

Speaker 1 Like, if you're going to be aggressive one spot, be aggressive the whole time. You're 0-3.
You're not a good football team. You're trying to get your first win in as an NFL coach.
Do it, man.

Speaker 7 Just do it. You know me, big cat.
I'm a big numbers guy. I believe in what the computers tell me.

Speaker 7 The computers said that Jacksonville was going to gain plus five percentage points if they went for it.

Speaker 1 On fourth and four? Yeah.

Speaker 7 So I don't know what computer that was. I know earlier today, I think, was it, was it, who was it that said,

Speaker 7 oh, Joe Judge, I think, said Bill Gates, a spreadsheet never won a Super Bowl. Yep.
Which is a fact, but Paul Allen

Speaker 7 was the co-founder of Microsoft, and I think he won a Super Bowl. He did win a Super Bowl.

Speaker 1 We're going to ignore that. I think I saw Will Brayson tweet that out.

Speaker 7 Credit to Will on that.

Speaker 1 Also, we had Nick Saban doing that tonight. He was going after the analytics guys.

Speaker 7 Yeah, analytics guys, you're on notice, right?

Speaker 1 Computer folks. Let me get Saban's quote.
Sabin was on one, as they say tonight. Saban said, I, wait, where is it?

Speaker 1 Oh, he doesn't trust some guy who sits at a computer and never played football. Yeah.
I'm not an analytics guy, is what Saban said.

Speaker 7 It sounded like a direct shot at us, personally.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he also says, Miss Terry always wants to blitz more.

Speaker 7 I like that. I like the aggressiveness.
But you're right when it comes to Urban Meyer.

Speaker 7 If you're going to go for it at the end of the game, go for it in the fourth quarter to put him away. Just do it.

Speaker 1 Just do it. Do it.

Speaker 7 What's going on over there? We got giggles coming from Hank and Bubba. I always think that's a great question.

Speaker 4 That's a great line from Miss Terry.

Speaker 1 Miss Terry wants to blitz more. I love whenever a football coach is on his weekly radio hit or TV appearance.
He's like, yeah, my wife thinks we got to be more aggressive with the guys.

Speaker 4 I'm also convinced that it's not just

Speaker 4 inner monologue of himself that he says.

Speaker 1 Well, and also it's a great way.

Speaker 4 He wants to blitz more.

Speaker 1 Yeah, well, it's also a great way to be like,

Speaker 1 you take whatever the fan base really wants, and then you put it on your wife, and you're like, she's the smart one.

Speaker 7 You know what's crazy is that, like, what if Miss Terry just doesn't even exist? Oh. Because think about it.
Her name is Mystery.

Speaker 1 Hmm. That's fucking wild.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 7 But he should blitz more.

Speaker 1 Yes, definitely Blitzmore.

Speaker 1 But a good game. The Bengals.

Speaker 1 I mean, I can't. So I think the Bengals are frisky.
I can't say they're good because they did lose to the Bears who are a dumpster fire.

Speaker 7 What did you call Jay Cutler? Did you call him Mr. second half or Mr.
fourth quarter? Mr. Fourth quarter.
Okay, I think Joe Burrow should be Mr. second half.
Okay.

Speaker 1 That's fine. He was fourth half.

Speaker 7 He was lights out in the second half. He came out, he took control.

Speaker 1 I think he's great.

Speaker 7 I think

Speaker 7 we can stop questioning whether or not he's going to be able to step into throws as he's getting hit. Yep.
Because he did that a few times, pulled his big old nuts out.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Yeah, he looked awesome. And Taj Boyd was awesome.
And obviously, Mark Chase was cash. Cash, always cash.
Anytime you want.

Speaker 7 The ATM.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but it was, yeah, the Bengals. The Bengals, I think, are officially on Frisky Watch.

Speaker 7 Yeah, who is more frisky? The Bengals or the Panthers?

Speaker 1 Ooh. I think the Panthers, if the Panthers beat the Cowboys, they might graduate to good.
Yeah, they're frisky right now.

Speaker 7 Correct, but they're on the precipice.

Speaker 1 I think the Bengals just joined the Panthers in the Frisky Watch.

Speaker 7 Okay, let's do a look ahead. Whose line is it anyway? Neutral field, Bengals, Steelers.

Speaker 1 Well, it was two and a half last week. So neutral field?

Speaker 1 I mean, it's probably a pickup.

Speaker 1 I guess it depends on if TJ Watts playing. Okay.
Probably if TJ Watts playing, maybe Steelers minus one is what I'd make it. I don't know.
Because I do make the lines.

Speaker 7 I like the Bengals.

Speaker 1 Shout out to everyone who tried to win the Larry hoodie tonight.

Speaker 1 Next week we'll come up with something better so that people can get it. Sorry.
It's not us. It's Larry.
Larry picked the Bengals.

Speaker 7 We're going to have a word with Larry. Larry is a fuckhead.

Speaker 1 He's unknown. He's a bitch, too.

Speaker 7 What? Do I have to eat him? No.

Speaker 1 That was if the alt-line hit of Jaguars minus 21.5.

Speaker 1 Billy, before we get to the weekend preview, anything else from this game?

Speaker 7 No, I think that's about it.

Speaker 7 I mean, all the primetime games this year have been awesome. Yes, they have.
I'm very excited about it. Except

Speaker 1 the last.

Speaker 1 And also when the Bears picked.

Speaker 7 All of them have been awesome.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Billy, your milk budget. It's October 1st.

Speaker 7 So I did the calculations.

Speaker 1 You don't have receipts?

Speaker 7 Five weeks. I'm giving it.
On average, I had two

Speaker 7 gallons.

Speaker 1 Totally made up. It's not made up.

Speaker 7 Okay. I thought he said for the month of September.

Speaker 1 And also, how many next months?

Speaker 4 The months have five weeks in them.

Speaker 1 And you also just said on average. So that means that's made up.

Speaker 7 Yeah, Billy's brain is like the bodybuilding.com. You usually argue over how many days are in a week.

Speaker 1 This wasn't a hard time.

Speaker 7 I drank a lot of milk.

Speaker 1 You could have just gone to the store like three times a week.

Speaker 5 I'd mental it.

Speaker 2 You could have just taken pictures.

Speaker 7 Yeah. Well, the thing is, all my receipts had like tons of stuff on it.

Speaker 1 Right.

Speaker 7 Like, you know, like prosciutto and stuff.

Speaker 1 Okay, tons of stuff. Yeah.
Yeah. You know, the usual groceries.
Billy. Milk and prosciutto.

Speaker 7 Billy might be the best person in the entire world at taking the easiest possible tasks and making them the most complicated tasks.

Speaker 7 Do you want the breakdown of

Speaker 1 it to us? Sorry. Okay, sorry.

Speaker 7 So I had 10 gallons of milk this month that i bought in gallon jugs and then on wednesday nights i like to get some like really good cookies and then i get the cream line uh um ronnie brook milk what does this have to do which is five dollars yeah five dollar liter okay i get two of them a week okay so all in all we're at around we'll call it even a hundred dollars okay that was so complicated and like

Speaker 1 Here, here's what I'm going to say right now. Here's your $100 for this month.

Speaker 1 Next, in October, I will continue to pay it, but I need documentation.

Speaker 1 If you provide it, I will give you,

Speaker 1 I will pay for it. If you don't, you have to give me the $100 back.
Okay.

Speaker 7 Do you understand? Do you need the exact documentation? I just.

Speaker 1 But the thing is, when I go to the store, save the receipt, Bill.

Speaker 7 But when I go to the store, the receipt has a bunch of other stuff on it. Well, you can still save that piece of paper, though.

Speaker 1 But I don't even need the paper.

Speaker 1 Part of the funny part of this whole experiment was you were to come in October 1st. I had the numbers.
This month I drank 14 gallons of milk.

Speaker 7 I'll tell you exactly how much I drank.

Speaker 1 How much?

Speaker 7 So I did.

Speaker 1 I was going to do

Speaker 1 it. 10 liters.

Speaker 7 10 liters plus 10 gallons. 10 pints plus 10 gallons.

Speaker 1 10 pints plus 10 gallons. Okay.

Speaker 7 Yeah, that's exactly how much I drank. Okay.
Just do me a favor, Billy. Just don't throw out any receipts so we don't go through this.
We're absolutely going to go through this again on November 1st.

Speaker 1 I counted my head. You know what? Just tweet me the picture.
Take a picture of the milk you buy every single time and tweet it out. Make a thread.
Okay. Okay?

Speaker 5 Yeah, make a thread.

Speaker 1 Make a milk thread.

Speaker 7 I'll make a milk thread. All right.

Speaker 1 Beautiful.

Speaker 7 Good job. Okay, I dropped the ball on this one.

Speaker 1 No, it's okay. It's okay.

Speaker 7 I counted in my head.

Speaker 1 To be expected. Yeah.
Yeah. I think Hank is just, you lost Hank.

Speaker 7 Hank's just staring at Billy like, what the fuck?

Speaker 1 There was a lot of milk content.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 7 Yeah, I paid for it.

Speaker 1 It did. All right, let's get to the weekend preview.
Okay, before we get to the weekend preview, quick word from our friends at Cross Country Mortgage.

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Speaker 7 That's good analysis.

Speaker 9 Yeah. So,

Speaker 1 if you were wondering at all about that, that,

Speaker 1 Wonder No More.

Speaker 7 Yeah, if you're curious, this game will be exclusively played only by Tom Brady and Bill Belichick. No other players will be playing.

Speaker 1 That would actually be funny if they just said if it was just Tom Brady and Bill Belichick. It was like a game of tag.

Speaker 7 I think that Bill Belichick could beat Tom Brady in a foot race.

Speaker 1 I think that's a possibility.

Speaker 1 That would be so funny to watch, though.

Speaker 7 It'd be like Charles Barkley racing Dick Bevetta. Yeah.
And then they kiss each other on the lips at the end.

Speaker 1 That would be good.

Speaker 1 So my understanding going into this game is I'm taking the bucks in this game, not for my official picks, which we'll have Jake update in a second, but you know the old saying, like, it's not personal, it's just business.

Speaker 1 That's true for Belichick, and it's the reverse for Brady. It's personal for Brady.
It's business for Belichick.

Speaker 1 Would that be fair?

Speaker 4 Yeah, I'm sure it's a little bit personal. He won't say it is, but I'm sure it is.
Okay.

Speaker 1 Okay. Yeah.
No, I like that. I know you might be a little bit.
Yeah.

Speaker 7 I think it's a little bit of both, like a trip to the Cayman Islands. You're there to

Speaker 7 check out your new tax hideout but at the same time you're gonna catch some time on a jet ski yeah

Speaker 1 yeah

Speaker 4 I think it's gonna be really emotional I I mean I'm looking forward to it it's one of those things like you know uh when people die or it's like why don't why don't they give people their flowers when they're still here it's cool that Brady's gonna get that recognition that love when he's still a player obviously you know you wish you were still in the Patriots but

Speaker 4 I don't know I don't think it's gonna be like I just think it's gonna be really emotional. There's gonna be a lot of good videos, a lot of good memories, a lot of trips down memory lane.

Speaker 4 The coming home video is going to be awesome. And I think, I do agree with you that the Bucs are probably going to kill the Patriots.

Speaker 1 Do you think they're going to be?

Speaker 4 The Bucs are sick.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Oh, they are sick.
That's right.

Speaker 1 And no Bronc. Do you think

Speaker 1 they're going to hold anything back on the video in case Tom Brady comes back to Foxborough in eight years' time still playing for the Tampa Bay Bucks?

Speaker 4 No.

Speaker 1 It's a thought.

Speaker 7 Is it official that they're doing a welcome home video like the Kyrie Irving? I would assume.

Speaker 7 Or it was, no, it was Isaiah Thomas when they had their video ready to go and he came back to the garden like six times and never got the video. Are they actually making of it?

Speaker 7 Are you just assuming that the Patriots video staff has put together a montage?

Speaker 4 Yeah, I'm assuming that.

Speaker 1 It's a fair assumption.

Speaker 1 It's one of those sports rule moments. Like the story, when storylines and sports all come together, and it's like, this is going to be a cool moment.

Speaker 1 You don't have a pulse if you don't think that this is going to be cool to watch and see Brady go against Belichick for the first time and Tom Brady potentially beat all 32 teams, which is maybe the coolest record out there.

Speaker 1 I don't think that's ever been done.

Speaker 7 Did Brett Favre do it quarterback? I don't know if Brett Favre did it.

Speaker 1 That's a good question. Can we find that out, Jake? He did not.

Speaker 7 He did. Oh, I'm pretty sure that was a big deal when he did do it that they talked about

Speaker 4 their new team or something.

Speaker 4 Or some type of like...

Speaker 1 No, not since Brett Favre.

Speaker 7 No, because the Texans would be the last team. Pretty sure he whooped the Texans.

Speaker 1 He might have, yeah, he might have done that.

Speaker 10 But either way. Tom Brady can join Peyton Manning, Drew Brees, and Brett Favre.

Speaker 1 Okay, so it's been done. Okay.

Speaker 9 All All right, so that

Speaker 1 ruined that.

Speaker 7 It's still cool, though. I think you're...

Speaker 1 No, it's honestly not as cool.

Speaker 1 I'm going to be honest with you.

Speaker 7 The musical point, I think, still stands that it is cool to be like, yeah, I've got every single pelt on my wall. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Shit. I should have thought Drew Brees.
I mean, that's a good trivia question that we could have saved.

Speaker 7 Imagine if you're McCorkle Jones, though, going into this game. Yeah.

Speaker 7 This is a big time the moment might actually be too big for Mac Jones because he's obviously a rookie quarterback and he feels like he's got a lot of responsibility taking over this franchise, Just like not ever being in the same building as Tom Brady, but just knowing that he's been entrusted to try to take over that legacy from Tom Brady.

Speaker 7 But then getting to see it up close and personal when you're going to have every fan at the stadium that's rooting for you also give a standing ovation to the guy that was there before you and is coming in to kick your ass.

Speaker 1 And everyone's always going to compare your career and how you do against that. that guy.
I wonder, do you think Tom Brady will pat him on the head?

Speaker 1 What do you think that's reaction's interaction is going to be? Like a who are you?

Speaker 4 No, it'll just be like a quick. I don't think there will be much.
Great game.

Speaker 1 Do you think Belichick and Brady will have a long embrace?

Speaker 4 Not long. They'll embrace.
They'll hug. They'll hug it out.
Love you.

Speaker 1 Yeah. I think it'll be a pretty

Speaker 7 quick embrace.

Speaker 4 It'll be an embrace and like a shoulder. They each touch the other person's top shoulder.

Speaker 7 Yeah. Yeah.
What's going to happen is there's going to be like a

Speaker 7 slight physical contact, and then after the game, they're going to ask Belichick about it, and he's going to be like, yeah, you know, we talked earlier in the week, and I'm going to leave what was in that conversation between Tom and I.

Speaker 7 There'll probably be some pre-game laws.

Speaker 1 Tom

Speaker 1 laughs within two weeks. We'll be like, Belichick said, fucked you, Tom.

Speaker 4 I could see there being some pregame laughs that they cut to during the broadcast.

Speaker 1 Yeah,

Speaker 1 this is them four hours before standing at the 50-yard line. Yeah, you're right.

Speaker 10 The trick is they cover their mouths so no one can lip read what they're saying.

Speaker 1 McDaniels will definitely be with Brady beforehand.

Speaker 7 They'll bring out like a special blue injury tint just for that pregame introduction to each other so nobody can see at all what happened there.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's going to be it's going to be cool, though. What do you got, Billy?

Speaker 7 After Kraft's comments on Belichick recently, how do you think Kraft's going to play into the dynamic?

Speaker 1 What were his comments? Are you talking about the book that's coming out? So that technically weren't his comment. Like, those were alleged comments.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he wasn't on record on any of these, but yeah.

Speaker 7 Hypothetically, if they were true, do you think Kraft's going to be warm to Brady and be like, sorry, things worked out how they did? Or how do you think he's going to play in the whole role?

Speaker 1 Good question, Billy. I think Kraft might mouthkiss Brady.

Speaker 4 I mean, Kraft's not going to be on the field.

Speaker 7 You don't think he's going to say hi to Brady?

Speaker 4 I'm sure he will. I don't think, again, those comments are alleged, so I don't think they're going to really acknowledge them.

Speaker 1 I bet they'll go out to dinner before the night before, honestly.

Speaker 7 I think Robert Kraft, we're going to see something special out of it in the booth. He's going to wear his nicest blue shirt with a white collar on it.

Speaker 7 He knows that this is a big moment for him and for the franchise.

Speaker 1 And there might be a special guest in his suite, so that you guys all recognize. Roger Goodell.
No, that would be funny.

Speaker 1 Bleep that. Yeah, bleep it.
Yeah, we don't know who's going to be there. Okay.
Yeah.

Speaker 7 That's something to look forward to.

Speaker 1 Yes, that would be something.

Speaker 7 Is there a towel? Is it towel night?

Speaker 1 I don't think towel night.

Speaker 1 Maybe there's a towel. I don't know.

Speaker 7 It is the matchup between the biggest age gap between two starting quarterbacks in the history of the NFL.

Speaker 4 Whoa.

Speaker 7 That's probably going to be broken the next time Tom Brady plays a rookie quarterback.

Speaker 1 I was going to say that probably that sucks for like Vinny Testaverdi. Yeah, because he probably had all those ranks.

Speaker 7 Also, I'm pretty sure Mac Jones isn't like an abnormally young rookie, is he? He's probably like 24.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I don't think he's.

Speaker 7 I think if he plays against 23, 23.

Speaker 2 And just one DUI.

Speaker 7 Just one DIII. Just one.
Just one DII.

Speaker 1 Thank you. Thank you.
Thank you.

Speaker 7 Yeah, but you could see how that could be mistaken with his eyes. Yes.

Speaker 1 All right, so let's do some picks. Let's talk about some games.
Let's get into it. Jake, you want to give us a standings update?

Speaker 10 Yeah, so it was a pretty average week. All of us went 2-2.
Liam, though, did go 3-1, so now we're tied for last to 5-7, and then it's a one-game separation all the way up.

Speaker 10 Hank got nine wins, Big Cat 8, PFT 7, Billy 6, Liam, and I, 5.

Speaker 1 So, again, me and Liam. Well,

Speaker 1 we would have, yeah. Rock, paper, scissors, shoot, real quick between the two of you.
Go.

Speaker 1 Rock.

Speaker 11 Rock, paper, scissors, shoot. Shoot.

Speaker 1 All right, so Jake won, so it's me and Liam still. Yeah.
Yeah, because this is for last, not for last.

Speaker 1 I was all turned around there for a second. Standing is still me and Liam.

Speaker 7 Bother and Big Cat. Yes.

Speaker 1 Hitting the road.

Speaker 1 And then what were the reminders?

Speaker 1 Wait, wait. Yeah, I'm excited.
Yeah.

Speaker 10 It's going to be great. On Wednesday's show, you told me.

Speaker 1 Liam, by the way, if we have to do it, we're just going to fly. Yeah.

Speaker 7 I told Bubba that, I think, a couple weeks ago that if it was me and Big Cat that ended up in last place,

Speaker 7 we would probably fly. We would drive for a day, and on the first day, we'd take pictures of ourselves at different gas stations.
Yeah.

Speaker 7 And then we'd upload them throughout the week from the beach in Los Angeles. Yeah, no worries.
We're stuck in traffic on 405.

Speaker 1 We'd fly from Pittsburgh to Denver. Yeah.
And then we'd finish the trip. Yep.

Speaker 10 Two reminders for you. On Wednesday, you told me, don't talk yourself into thinking Belichick is drawing up something crazy to stop TB12.

Speaker 7 Thank you.

Speaker 1 Thank you. I'm not.
I'm not. I think Tom Brady, like I said, the personal, like this is Tom Brady is going to be treating this game as if it's a Super Bowl, I believe.

Speaker 10 And then, second, this is retroactive to week one. You told me to remind you to bet on Mike Tomlin as an underdog.

Speaker 1 After they beat the Bills. The underdog king.
That actually is a very good reminder and one of my picks. We'll get to him.
But let's start with, actually, let's start with our underdog. So I'll start.

Speaker 1 I'm taking the Steelers plus seven. That was the game that I looked at when I like to look at the whole thing on Monday morning and be like, what's the easiest bet? And I was like, Packers, so easy.

Speaker 1 And then I realized Mike Tomlin is an underdog. The Steelers cannot look worse.
Big Ben

Speaker 1 looks.

Speaker 4 Very, very bad.

Speaker 7 Literally too much time on the clock on Big Ben's career.

Speaker 1 I was on Pittsburgh Radio this morning. PFT and I switch each.
We go back and forth on Pittsburgh Radio every other week. And our good friend Randy Bauman, who hosts the show, he's in full denial.

Speaker 1 So he's in full. Offensive line is to blame.
Matt Canada

Speaker 1 has new terminology. I offered up that maybe

Speaker 1 put the play card on a P.F. Chang's menu to help him ease it in.

Speaker 1 But he's in full denial.

Speaker 1 So that's where Pittsburgh's at right now. But I think they win this game.
I think they win win it outright, Hank. What do you think?

Speaker 1 No? I don't know.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 7 This is a good game to check in on the Aaron Rodgers is interested meter. Because if he's really interested in engaged this year, they should beat that Steelers defense pretty badly.

Speaker 1 Yeah, although they'll get guys back. But they think most of the guys are back.

Speaker 7 Pittsburgh gets a couple guys back, but also, I mean, it's in Lambeau, right? Yep. So this is a tricky thing.

Speaker 7 On Sunday night, the game was going to be the Browns against the Steelers, and then the NFL completely rearranged the schedule

Speaker 1 on me, and then made it the Packers against the Steelers. I thought the Bears were playing the Vikings, so they rearranged meets.
They did.

Speaker 7 The NFL does this occasionally, I think, a couple times a year. They just do a surprise schedule switch at the last minute.

Speaker 7 But yeah, I do think that I like Mike Tomlin as an underdog, but I think that this all falls into Aaron Rodgers' lap.

Speaker 7 Like if he is still engaged, if he's not happy, you know, just sitting on that Sunday night win, I think the Packers should blow them out.

Speaker 4 I just think Mike Shalom is tough to take Big Ben. I know it's very tough.
It's tough to put faith in Big Ben after some of the people.

Speaker 1 Find a staff for me, Mike Tomlin, as an underdog. I'm sure you can search it.
Mike Tomlin as an underdog is incredible. He's out of this world.
He always comes. Remember that game was like maybe.

Speaker 1 Oh, no, that was as a favorite. To always bet against him as a favorite.
That was a good idea. It's 10-Cows.

Speaker 10 I think it's 10-7 outright in games they're favored.

Speaker 1 No, no, as an underdog. I need it as an underdog.

Speaker 7 Tomlin as an underdog is a good coach.

Speaker 1 He's a very good coach. He's a good rah-rah-rah.
Get him ready to go. World against us kind of coach.
All right, PFT, your underdog.

Speaker 7 My underdog, I'm going to take the Texans at at the Bills. Oh, please.
Plus 16.5 Mills Mafia versus Bills Mafia. And it's just too many points.
The Texans get paid to play football, too.

Speaker 7 That's one thing that we have to remember.

Speaker 4 It is a lot of points.

Speaker 7 It is a lot of points.

Speaker 7 And in case you've forgotten just how dysfunctional the Texans are, there was a report that came out this week about Bill O'Brien and how he was trying his very hardest to get fired because he wanted to go back to New England and eventually take over the reins from Bill Belichick.

Speaker 7 And the Texans just wouldn't fire him. They are so bad as a franchise that they wouldn't fire a coach who is actively doing everything possible that he could to get fired.

Speaker 1 So I found this at Mike Tomlin is a six-plus-point underdog, is 9-3-1 against the spread.

Speaker 1 I like that pick, PFT, not because I think they're going to cover the spread. I think that you're going to know within the first five minutes how that game's going to go.

Speaker 7 Yeah, you'll probably be able to figure it out pretty quickly.

Speaker 1 It's going to be either Bills just killing them or like, oh, the Texans are frisky today. Who knows?

Speaker 7 I think if David Cully's vision for this offense is, let's get two first downs and punt.

Speaker 7 If we can get two first downs and punt on every single drive, I think that the Bills aren't going to cover 16.5.

Speaker 7 Now, obviously, Josh Allen could go out and throw a 90-yard touchdown pretty much at will. Yes.
But I don't know. I hate the Texans.

Speaker 7 I think that they're a crummy football team, but I like 16.5 points a lot.

Speaker 1 I like it. Also, another stat to back it up, as just an underdog since 2015, Mike Tomlin is 19-6-1 against the spread.
Okay. so he's an underdog guy.
I like that. He just loves being a dog.

Speaker 7 One more thing: when I saw this Bill O'Brien thing about him talking about wanting to get fired and go back to the Patriots, does this just confirm everything that we've said over the years that every former assistant coach to Bill Belichick operates as a satellite head coach of the New England Patriots?

Speaker 7 Yes. And is it just they send these coaches out to other franchises to destroy them from within and then bring them back to New England so the Patriots can continue their reign of dominance?

Speaker 1 Yes. And I also like Mike, sorry, Bill O'Brien having an inflated self-worth where he's like, they're going to name me the next coach.
Yeah. Golden parachute.

Speaker 1 I can always go back to New England because who doesn't think of Bill O'Brien when they think of the Patriots?

Speaker 7 Exactly. He's riding that one season that they had at Penn State where they lost all their scholarships and everybody was like, they're going to lose every game.

Speaker 7 And then I think they ended up going about 500

Speaker 7 that year. Best coaching job ever.
It's the best coaching job that we've ever seen, college football. Correct year.

Speaker 1 Correct. All right, Bubba, your.
Is that my computer?

Speaker 7 I have a secret underdog, too. I'll wait till the end to give my secret underdog.

Speaker 1 Bubba, your underdog.

Speaker 4 I'm taking Detroit plus two and a half.

Speaker 4 I don't think I've actually watched a Lions game other than Red Zone, but I just kind of tell myself they're going to keep it close.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 I just...

Speaker 1 I keep going back and forth because...

Speaker 1 There's a potential that the Bears can just embarrass themselves every Sunday, but this does feel like a hollow win that the Bears will get that then Matt Nagy can get in front of everyone and be like, see, told you guys, like, we got this thing on the right path.

Speaker 1 We're two and two.

Speaker 7 As a non-Bears fan, I can forgive Matt Nagy for almost everything that he does unless he makes me watch Nick Foles on Sunday. If he makes me watch Nick Foles, I'm 100% out on him.

Speaker 1 It's going to be almost all on board.

Speaker 7 The Nagy out thing. Yes.
So it's not going to be Dalton. Have they made any announcement yet?

Speaker 1 I think Dalton's out. They haven't made an announcement.
I think Dalton's out. Justin Fields has

Speaker 1 a little cast on his wrist that looks like he has carpal tunnel. Like when

Speaker 1 the person who's never leaves their desk at the accounting firm, he's been typing for 50 years and then they just type with a cast on their wrist.

Speaker 1 That's what he looks like. And then, yeah, Nick Foles.
Oh my God.

Speaker 1 I don't want it.

Speaker 7 If you had to pick one quarterback that could potentially get sacked more than nine times, more than last week, Nick Foles would probably be the guy. Easily.

Speaker 7 I think Nick Foles, he sees that record and he's like licking his chops. He's like, give me 10.
I got this. I got this.

Speaker 1 Hank, your underdog.

Speaker 4 Riding with Bubba. Lions, hungriest dog in the NFL, I would say.

Speaker 1 Really? Not the Colts? Nope.

Speaker 1 Shout out to that one guy who I do my rankings of the bad teams and I did 0-3 rankings and he replied two days later saying the Colts don't deserve to be on this list. It's true.
They're 0-3.

Speaker 1 It's true. They don't deserve to be.

Speaker 7 No, no,

Speaker 7 it's an 0-3, but it's a Mickey Mouse 0-3. They should have won one of those games.

Speaker 4 If it wasn't for a 66-yard field goal and some rain, they'd be 2-1. They almost won the first game, too, so they could basically be 3-0.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but Hollywood Brown dropped three touchdowns, so you could say if it wasn't for Hollywood Brown dropping... Oh, sorry.

Speaker 1 Marquise Brown. Marquise, yeah, we took away three touchdowns.

Speaker 4 I think a couple of them were overthrows, but I guess if you can touch it, you can catch it. Either way,

Speaker 4 Jay God's going to be hungry. I think the Lions are going to smash him.
This will be on the Hungry Dog Money Line parlay.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Gonna smash him.

Speaker 4 Smash them. I mean, I listened to you talk about the Bears over and over and over again, and it sounds like an absolute dumpster fire, cluster fuck of a team.

Speaker 4 The Lions have been playing well, all things considered, for an 0-3 team, as far as an 0-3 team goes. And I think this is the game that gets them on the right path.

Speaker 1 This is just the type of game, though, that the Bears win just so that they can be like, we're 2-2. We're not that bad.

Speaker 1 If they win this game, I guarantee you in the press conference afterwards, Met Nagy's going to be like, first goal every year, win your division games. 1-0.

Speaker 7 We're 1-0 this week. That's all that matters.
I mean, objectively speaking, would you rather have a team with a shitty roster and a low-T head coach or a shitty roster and a high-T head coach?

Speaker 7 Definitely the high T. So, that's to me, I feel like the Lions can definitely win this game.

Speaker 10 Jake, this makes me nervous.

Speaker 1 I'm riding with the British. Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 Had it written down. Can't change picks.
I know it's an honor system. Okay, Billy.

Speaker 1 I'm now very confident in the Bears.

Speaker 7 I know what Billy's going to take. I'm going with the Jets.
Yes.

Speaker 1 Yes, you are. Good job.

Speaker 7 They're plus seven. And look, I'm at a good 50% right now, 50-50, 6, and 6.
So I'm trying to stay 50-50 because it's the safest spot on the board. You don't get too high because you might get second.

Speaker 7 Again, there's only

Speaker 7 200%. But wait, are you

Speaker 1 picking this up?

Speaker 7 Are you trying to win this game or trying to lose this one? Well, if it loses, it'll count to one of my losses. I've allowed myself to get to the other side.

Speaker 1 And then you're trying to win the other game. What if it wins?

Speaker 7 Well, if it wins, I mean, then one of the ones I thought was going to win is probably going to lose.

Speaker 1 So I'll just say it a perfect 50-50. Nice.
You've got this figured out.

Speaker 7 I mean, Zach Wilson, if he keeps throwing half as many interceptions as he did the previous week, this week he'll only throw one interception.

Speaker 1 Exactly. I actually don't hate the Jets this week.

Speaker 1 If there's a spot,

Speaker 7 stopping Derrick Henry is going to be tough, but their run defense is one of their strong points.

Speaker 1 Yeah. So, okay.

Speaker 7 That was my secret under my secret underdog for the week, too.

Speaker 1 Jets. Yeah, no, I think there's, you always have to be so nervous about those teams that aren't winning in like September.
They're going to, at some point, win a game.

Speaker 1 I mean, obviously, if you said that about the Browns and the Lions the year, they didn't win a game, but they're going to. You just got to catch it at the right time.

Speaker 7 When Mims comes back, I'm going to be a lot more confident in their ability.

Speaker 1 He's the key to unlock the offense.

Speaker 7 Well, he's the alpha wide receiver who's going to go up for the ball. Got it.
Really go get it. Got it.

Speaker 1 Love that. Love that analysis.
All right, my favorite. I'm going to go with the Browns.
Minus two. I'm just going simply.
Kevin Stefanski was a coach for the Vikings for 14 years.

Speaker 1 He knows everything about them.

Speaker 1 And Miles Garrett and Jadavian Clowney sack, like, visualize Miles Garrett and Jadavian Clowney running free off the edge for Kirk Cousins, and that's a good visual to win that game.

Speaker 7 I think Kirk Cousins, he's playing like an MVP right now. Let's recognize that Kirk Cousins.

Speaker 1 Yeah, okay, fine.

Speaker 7 Kirk Cousins is leading every single PFF stat that there could possibly be. He's without question the best quarterback in the league.
And we were talking

Speaker 7 when is he going to turn into the pumpkin? I've actually identified exactly when he's going to turn back into old Kirk Cousins. Not this weekend.
Not this weekend, I don't think.

Speaker 7 Although he does run into a lot of sacks. Yes.
I think that's like Kirk Cousins' specialty. He will move the pocket, but he'll move it directly into a defensive lineman.
I think Halloween.

Speaker 7 I think he's going to have the entire month of October this year. And then on Halloween, he's playing in primetime against the Cowboys.
Oh, so

Speaker 1 give him his flowers.

Speaker 1 This is a different Kirk Cousins. Exactly.

Speaker 7 And then he's got a couple more primetime games after that, some tougher defenses that he's going to be going up against. So I think Kirk Cousins, listen, I'll be the first to say it.

Speaker 7 I was wrong about Kirk Cousins, Big Cat, for the month of October. There we go.
And September. And September.
But then he's going to be Kirk Cousins after that.

Speaker 1 I'm looking at the schedule right now. The fact that the Bears and the Vikings play Monday night football December 20th, that is a slap in America's face.

Speaker 7 It's gross.

Speaker 7 Go ahead, your favorite. Okay, my favorite.
I'm just going to take the Bucs, minus seven.

Speaker 1 There we go. Taking the Bucks.

Speaker 7 We talked about that game. It's easy as that.
We talked about it.

Speaker 7 It comes down to the fact that the Bucs, I think, just have a much, much, much, much better roster overall.

Speaker 7 And then Bruce Arians was trying to say that he's taking credit for Tom Brady's success and saying that it was like that Bill Belichick essentially was a system coach with Tom Brady.

Speaker 7 Just let Tom manage the game and then you look like a genius.

Speaker 7 Bruce Arians is going to go out there. And I think Antonio Brown is coming back now off the 10-day COVID thing or whatever.
Yep, I saw that. Yeah.
Like we said earlier,

Speaker 7 I think the Bucs win this game by 20.

Speaker 1 Has Gronk been officially ruled out?

Speaker 4 He didn't practice.

Speaker 10 I saw it was actually very likely to play.

Speaker 1 Oh, okay. But I don't know.
Revenge game for him, too.

Speaker 1 Bubba, favorite?

Speaker 4 I'm taking

Speaker 4 Dallas minus four and a half.

Speaker 1 I think he's got to move some numbers around after that. I do.

Speaker 1 That was some news you didn't need. The Cowboys.

Speaker 4 Yeah, I'm coming with you.

Speaker 1 I think they're good. Yeah, if they win this game,

Speaker 1 I think the Panthers are frisky, but they've also not played a lot of great teams. But if the Cowboys win this game and do it convincingly, I think the Cowboys are good overdrive will start.

Speaker 1 I actually have been throwing this out. Dak Prescott, 13-1 to win the MVP.
Because

Speaker 1 you've got to look at the narrative, come back. Everyone wants, you know, America, especially the writers, want the Cowboys to be good so they can talk about it.
Dak Prescott, 13-1, win the MVP.

Speaker 4 I also think Sam Darnold will just turn back into himself at some point. Yes.

Speaker 1 Agreed.

Speaker 4 Like, he'll eventually lose a game. He's been doing everything to not lose them, but I think

Speaker 7 that this is a game, though, I can see the Cowboys losing because they take on the personality of Jerry Jones sometimes where they do tend to show up more in primetime games and like glamorous games.

Speaker 7 And in this game, it's like against the Panthers. I can't think of like a less glamorous week.
Like nobody had this game circled on the calendar if you're a Dallas Cowboys fan.

Speaker 7 Like I can't wait until we play the Carolina Panthers. Yeah.

Speaker 1 McCaffrey's out. McCaffrey is out.
McCaffrey's out. And I think I saw Matt Ruhl said that they're just going to run the offense as if he's there.

Speaker 7 Which that's probably not. Yeah.
That's Sam Darnold throwing picks.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's not the best.

Speaker 1 Hank, have you recovered from the Gronk news?

Speaker 4 Yeah, that's coming up later. I'm just going to stick with it, but I'm going to take the Dolphins for my favorite.

Speaker 1 Ooh, need a bounce back.

Speaker 7 Hungry dogs?

Speaker 1 The culture 0-3.

Speaker 4 Yeah, but the Dolphins are also hungry dogs, even though they're favorites, because they've lost their last two.

Speaker 4 And

Speaker 4 it's a low, you know, they're not heavy favorites. Yeah.
So it's kind of like two hungry dogs running next to each other.

Speaker 7 There you go. The Dolphins have covered in 12 of their last 14 games following a straight-up loss.

Speaker 11 Whoa, that's that.

Speaker 1 That's that.

Speaker 7 I have a question for you, Hank. Yeah.
What are the Dolphins? What is their identity? Because as far as I can tell, their identity is just waiting for Deshaun Watson to get traded to them.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I don't know.

Speaker 4 They're the same as always, like the third best team in the AFC East.

Speaker 1 I feel like it's play defense

Speaker 1 and hope enough. Beat the Patriots in December.
Yeah, hope enough works out on offense to win.

Speaker 7 I think it's the mission is to be competitive enough where after every game, all your fans can say they would have won that game with Deshaun Jack or Deshaun Watson as their quarterback.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and also a secondary statement of we're headed in the right direction. Yeah.
Yeah, Brian Norris is a good chicken.

Speaker 4 But it's like, how many real Dolphins fans are even out there?

Speaker 1 Jake, Frank.

Speaker 1 I'm not even like a diehard. Right.
I'm just a hometown.

Speaker 7 There's like dozens of us, like never nudes. Yeah.

Speaker 4 There's really not. I don't know.
I mean, we'll see, but I feel like of all the fan bases, they have the most, you know.

Speaker 7 Well, it's

Speaker 4 good if they're good, bad if they're. Don't care if they're bad.

Speaker 1 Can we turn this TV off? There's just a woman showing all of her.

Speaker 7 Looks like she got stabbed.

Speaker 1 Yeah, did she get stabbed?

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 1 Jake, your favorite.

Speaker 10 I'm going to fade Billy here and take the Titans minus seven.

Speaker 1 Ooh,

Speaker 1 okay. It's just even if it looks

Speaker 10 you just are picking against that atrocious team.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah. No, you feel good walking away being like, I bet against the Jets.

Speaker 7 Yeah, or I bet against Billy. Yeah.

Speaker 1 That's a good feeling. Yeah, 50% of the time.
Because he is going 50-50. Yep.
Yeah.

Speaker 7 My favorite is the Chiefs minus 7 against against the Eagles. They're going to absolutely clown.

Speaker 1 So this is counting as a win.

Speaker 7 This one's a win.

Speaker 1 They're going to clown the Eagles. They're going to clown them.
They're going to put the Elsie shoes on.

Speaker 7 Wait, wait, are they going to put the clown shoes on them? Are they going to clown them?

Speaker 1 They're going to clown them.

Speaker 7 No, literally, they're going to make the Eagles look like clowns.

Speaker 1 I love it.

Speaker 7 Like, Mahomes is going to run around, like, throw some fucking deep bomb and just get Tyreek Hill. And Tyreek's going to peace sign everyone at the one-yard line.
It's going to be a clown show.

Speaker 1 Also, I want to go back to one thing with Jalen Hurts when he said that when you take a douche, you don't look at it. You always look at it.
Oh, yeah. Always.

Speaker 7 I look at it more than once.

Speaker 1 Yeah, always. You got to look at it.
That's basically what a men's physical is. Yeah.
You look at him. You shit and you give it an ocular, like, okay.

Speaker 4 Come back 45 minutes later. Yeah.
Make sure it's still good.

Speaker 1 Plenty balls. That's a poop lasagna, the lasagna.

Speaker 7 Yeah, he looks before he shits.

Speaker 1 Yeah, right.

Speaker 7 There might be a Gator in there. It is an Andy Reid revenge game, too.
Yeah, it's a bounce back.

Speaker 1 Is he going to be there?

Speaker 7 I think so, yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay, so he's good. It's obvious.

Speaker 7 They're bouncing back. Gonna make him a clown show.
I love it. Clown show.
Guaranteed one. How many pre-produced video segments are we getting reminding us that Jason and Travis Kelse are brothers?

Speaker 7 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 Three. A lot.
Three. Three.
Probably three. Nice, nice.

Speaker 1 All right. My over, I'm going with just the fun over.
Cardinals, Rams, over 54.5. Afternoon game.
The afternoon games are incredible, by the way, because you have Cardinals, Rams, you have Steelers,

Speaker 9 Packers, you have, what was the other one?

Speaker 1 Oh, Seahawks, 49ers, and Ravens, Broncos. Like, those four games are all going to be great games that we can focus on.

Speaker 1 So that game, I just, I saw the stat.

Speaker 1 Tommy Smokes told to me, and then also Florio tweeted out, the

Speaker 1 Rams under Sean McVay are 8-0 against the Cardinals with a combined score of 251 to 91.

Speaker 1 So Sean McVay owns the Cardinals.

Speaker 7 Yeah, I feel like these Cardinals are a little bit different.

Speaker 1 They are. They are.
These Cardinals

Speaker 7 look more legit.

Speaker 7 Although some, if you're going to put a fraud label on a team, if you were to pick a really, really good team right now and say which one is most likely to be fraudulent at the end of the year, I still feel like the Cardinals have, as a franchise, they'll always have that stink of fraudulence on them.

Speaker 1 I agree.

Speaker 7 Them and the Raiders, you could make that argument for them that they should not be 3-0 or that they won't hang on to this.

Speaker 1 You just don't trust them.

Speaker 7 I don't trust them. I don't trust the Cardinals yet, but I do think that the offense is awesome.
And like you, I had this as my over.

Speaker 7 My only note on this game was literally the Rams cards because it's fun. Yeah, right.
This is going to be a fun game to just root for points in.

Speaker 1 Yes, it's going to like you're going to watch the entire first slate. It's tucked in there.

Speaker 1 It's the 405 game, so you're going to kind of not even realize it started, and then boom, touchdown, touchdown, touchdown. Wow, this is fun.

Speaker 1 Bubba, you're over.

Speaker 1 Houston Buffalo over 47. Okay.

Speaker 4 I just think, I don't know, Josh Allen might do it all himself. I like that.

Speaker 7 I like that. Are you adding it?

Speaker 5 it? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay, you added it. Is that added as a win or a low? That's a win.
Okay, win.

Speaker 7 That's going to be a big time are you for real game for the Bills, too. If they blow him out, then it's like, yeah, okay, this Bills team has found themselves.

Speaker 7 Joshua's the AFC offensive player of the week.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 1 Hank.

Speaker 4 Falcons football team.

Speaker 1 Whoa.

Speaker 1 Kind of gross. Yeah.

Speaker 4 Sounds disgusting when you say it. Yeah.
But the football team defense is bad. The Falcons are bad, but Maddie Ryan's good.

Speaker 1 feel like he's going to be.

Speaker 4 Yeah, I mean, he's a good quarterback. He can get points on the board.
He's also, you know, susceptible for some pick sixes. He's already thrown a bunch this year.
Yep.

Speaker 4 I just feel like it's going to be a sneaky over.

Speaker 1 Give us, so PFT, give us your,

Speaker 1 like, choose your own adventure. Uh-huh.

Speaker 1 Washington football team wins, and Washington football team loses where you're at.

Speaker 7 Okay.

Speaker 7 So it does scare me that Arthur Blank kept the beard. Yep.
That's terrifying to me.

Speaker 7 But if I were to give my three keys for victory for the Washington football team, number one would be be pin your ears back. Yep.

Speaker 7 No, no. Let me write these up.
I'm sorry. Yeah, no, that's number two.
I spoke to you soon. Number one is actually dial something up.

Speaker 7 So Jack Del Rio needs to dial something up this week. Number two is the defense needs to pin their ears back.
And then number three is just convince Arthur Smith to shave the beard.

Speaker 7 I think I said Arthur Blank earlier.

Speaker 7 But that's okay. He doesn't have a beard.
He still has the creepy ghost mustache.

Speaker 1 It's just dawning on me that they have two arts.

Speaker 7 Two arcs, yeah.

Speaker 7 It's not good. No.
But if the football team loses,

Speaker 1 I'm done. Done.
If the football team loses and the Cowboys win, it feels like.

Speaker 7 Well, if the football team loses, they're going to also lose their next six games because they have the hardest schedule in the NFC.

Speaker 7 We have to get to December within like four games of 500, and then we play all of our division games, then anything can happen in the NFC beast.

Speaker 7 But right now, yeah, if you don't beat the Falcons, then you are never going to be good to begin with.

Speaker 1 I also have started to do this thing in my head.

Speaker 1 I think probably people will relate to it, but with this extra game, game, the fact that there's 18 weeks, in my head, I'm saying to myself, there are so many more extra games.

Speaker 1 Like there's a ton of time. Yeah.
But there's not. There's one.

Speaker 7 There's one. There's one extra game.

Speaker 1 But it feels like you're like, oh, they're going to play regular season games in January. This season, like you have so much time to make up if you lose.

Speaker 7 Do you know what I'm saying, though, when it comes to the dial something up?

Speaker 7 That's something that I think most fan bases can relate to, where if you have a defense that just sucks, and like I said, no bullshitting this week, we suck.

Speaker 7 If you can't get to the quarterback, you just just ask the defense, hey, dial something up for us, real quick. Dial it up.
So Jack Del Rio, if you're listening, I know that you're a big AWL.

Speaker 7 Shout out to you. Dial something up.

Speaker 1 Dial it up.

Speaker 1 Who are we at? Where are we at?

Speaker 10 Jake. Cleveland, Minnesota over 52.

Speaker 1 Also a fun one.

Speaker 10 Both teams averaging around 29 points per game. So keep that up.

Speaker 1 Like it. Dome overs.
All right, we're on unders because Billy has the same one as Bubba.

Speaker 1 I think we hit almost all the games. I'm doing, we've already hit this game.
Bears Lions under 42. I just don't.
I mean, this game's going to suck. Yep.

Speaker 7 That would be a good one to bet the under on. I don't see any way that it goes over that.

Speaker 1 If Nick Foles plays, it will probably drop to like 37. Yeah.

Speaker 1 It'll be like a tornado's coming through.

Speaker 7 It also might be one of those games where one team scores like 20 points and the other scores three. Three, yeah.
Like one team's going to finish this game in single digits. Yep.

Speaker 1 Yep.

Speaker 7 All right. You're under? My under, this is almost a lock for me, actually.
Whoa.

Speaker 1 So you're counting this as a win in this Billy method.

Speaker 7 Yeah, in my Billy metrics, this is my first, my lock of the year so far, Panthers, Cowboys under 51.5.

Speaker 7 Because I was alerted to this stat earlier this week from Adam Kommelander.

Speaker 7 Every single game that the Panthers have played in this year, the total has been exactly 33.

Speaker 1 Wow.

Speaker 7 33 games, three times in a row. That's crazy.
51.5 in this game.

Speaker 1 Is that a score of me?

Speaker 7 It's the opposite of scorigami.

Speaker 1 Three times in a row, though.

Speaker 7 They're addicted to scorigami, or to non-score games. 33.

Speaker 1 That just means it's going to be a 66.

Speaker 7 It's going to to double it. Yeah.
I don't know. I'm feeling the under.
Okay. 51.5.

Speaker 1 Take the under. Bubba.

Speaker 4 Titans, Jets. I just feel like the Jets can't score.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Stinky game.

Speaker 1 There are some stinkers on this slate: the Bears and the Lions and the Titans and the Jets. The Bears Lions are going to be good.
Washing Football Team Falcons, maybe be in that stinker.

Speaker 7 You know what sucks is that as citizens of New York City, the greatest city on earth,

Speaker 7 we get trade.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but still,

Speaker 7 you know what? New Jersey is where the Jets are from. So you own the Jets.
That's on you. We're going to have to watch the Jets if you don't.
Oh, my God.

Speaker 11 It sucks.

Speaker 7 You have to watch Jets Titans this week.

Speaker 4 Or the fucking Giants. Like, it's disgusting.

Speaker 1 I can't wait till Apple or Amazon buys it all. So let us watch every game.
We're in 2021. We should never, there should never be a game that takes place that you can't watch.

Speaker 4 I have the Direct TV Sunday ticket thing, but it's like I put the Patriots on that.

Speaker 4 And it's behind, so if anything happens, it just shows up on red zone. Yeah.

Speaker 7 So Crackstreams pretty much got shut down. So now there are a million different fake crack streams websites out there.

Speaker 7 And I had to track one down for the football team Bills game last week because I was watching at my house. And it's tough.
It's tough. My computer is just

Speaker 7 swimming in spyware right now from everybody.

Speaker 4 Are you scared that Billy's a cop?

Speaker 7 I'm very terrible. I know that Billy's a cop.
He is. It's so tough to find that tiny little fucking X to click on.
And if you click on the wrong X, it's like, congratulations.

Speaker 7 You've just bought 17 Chinese children.

Speaker 1 And 14 boner pills.

Speaker 7 Yeah, exactly. So, FBI, I'm sorry.
I was just trying to watch Josh Allen kick my ass. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you click on that wrong axe, and all of a sudden, you got a bunch of chicks who are like, are you horny? Because I live right next door to you. Yeah, horny.

Speaker 7 I never knew there were so many horny singles in my area looking to fuck.

Speaker 1 Jake, yo, Hank, you're under.

Speaker 4 Patriots Buccaneers.

Speaker 1 With the Gronk news.

Speaker 1 That one, that was a big factor into it.

Speaker 4 I've ignored that data. I'm just going to keep going with it.
I think he's sick. I think Brady, I heard, is a little bit sick.
A lot of emotions. Patriots can't score anyway.
Bucks start slow.

Speaker 1 I like it. That's my under.

Speaker 7 That was last week they were sick, though. That was like a week ago.

Speaker 4 I saw some rumors that Brady was having a cold as well.

Speaker 1 He's got long

Speaker 1 cold.

Speaker 4 Well, if there's a bug going around, it can get to different people at different times. I don't know if you know how sickness and germs work.
I don't.

Speaker 7 But I did see that Tom Brady said after the game, this is actually lending credence to what you're saying. He said that his arm wasn't tired, but his throat was really sore.

Speaker 7 But he said it was from yelling so much, but maybe it was just because maybe it's because he's got strep.

Speaker 4 It could be. I mean, also, again, Gronk was a big factor in this decision, so just factor that into your understanding of my decisions.

Speaker 7 Got it.

Speaker 1 Yep.

Speaker 4 I'm sticking with it. All right.

Speaker 1 Jake and Billy to wrap us up.

Speaker 10 Colts Dolphins under 42.5. This screams like a 20-16 final.

Speaker 7 Don't know which way, but low scoring.

Speaker 1 And Billy?

Speaker 7 Seahawks 49ers.

Speaker 1 Oh,

Speaker 1 we haven't talked about this game.

Speaker 7 Yeah, just I looked at the teams.

Speaker 1 I was like, I don't think they're going to go over.

Speaker 7 I looked at the number, and it was 52.

Speaker 1 Whoa, now I was surprised.

Speaker 7 I don't mind this pick, actually, because the Seahawks.

Speaker 4 When you say, I don't think it's going to go over, do you have a number in your mind?

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's kind of like...

Speaker 1 What'd your computer say?

Speaker 7 Yeah. So, like, you look at Bill's Texan, you're like, oh, this could go over.

Speaker 1 And then you look at it. Over what?

Speaker 7 Just like...

Speaker 7 It's like an over game, just like a general, like consensus. And then you look at the number of the Bills Texan game, and it's 47.
You're like, that's one of the lower overs. Uh-huh.

Speaker 1 And like, so yeah, it could hit.

Speaker 7 But this one was the opposite. What did this one feel like? Seahawks 49ers.
Like, oh, this is like a scuzzy game. It's a scuzzy game.
And then I look at the over, and it's 52, and I'm like, oh.

Speaker 7 That's not going over. Too many points.
Too many points. So I don't think that you're far off on this because the Seahawks are last in the league in times of possession.

Speaker 1 And they don't score in the second half.

Speaker 7 They don't score in the second half. But if you're Pete Carroll, this is the kind of guy Pete Carroll is.

Speaker 7 He sees that stat that says that we are last in the league in terms of how much we control the clock. And if you're a football guy, what do you say to that?

Speaker 7 You're like, well, we just got to run the ball better. We have to establish the run.
So Pete Carroll is going to go out there. He's going to be like, I'm not going to let Russ Cook.

Speaker 7 This is Carson City. I'm just going to run the ball, run the damn ball, and run the damn ball all afternoon.
But this is also a loss. One of my 50-50s that I'm playing with.

Speaker 1 I'm playing this as a loss.

Speaker 1 Why didn't you tell us that? Well, no, because it's just. All right.

Speaker 1 Please keep track of a separate tab of which ones he expects to lose and which one he expects to win so we can.

Speaker 7 Billy, when you're looking at these two teams, you actually think that it's an over team. Yeah, the Seahawks have scored like 30.

Speaker 1 Yeah, since Hawaii.

Speaker 7 So you just lied to us. No, but like...

Speaker 1 That's also not true. They haven't scored 30.

Speaker 7 I have like multiple voices telling me different things in my head. You're schizophrenic.
Got it. Okay.

Speaker 1 I will say, Rap.

Speaker 10 Since he introduced this method, you hit both his over and under last week.

Speaker 1 Okay, so we'll see.

Speaker 1 The only other game we need to talk about, which is actually a great game, is the Broncos and the Ravens. The true are the Broncos for real.

Speaker 1 They've played three teams, they're 0-9, and the Ravens have played some pretty good teams.

Speaker 1 I like, we're going to walk away from this being like, watch out for the Broncos, or yeah, that's exactly what we thought the Broncos were.

Speaker 7 They need to let Justin Tucker try a 76-yard field goal in the thin air up in Mile High. A weapon.
Yeah, do it for the people. Let us see.

Speaker 7 He just got upgraded to a 99 on Madden, which I don't know what Justin Tucker was before as a kick hole. But now he's a 99 on Madden for a limited time.
They said, this is a rat line, though.

Speaker 7 Hank pointed this out to me the other day.

Speaker 7 It's Broncos minus one. Yeah.
It's a rat. Everyone wants to bet on the Ravens this week.
I think Lamar Jackson has diarrhea. He hasn't practiced for the last two days.

Speaker 7 Some are saying it's from the flip that he did into the end zone.

Speaker 7 I don't know.

Speaker 7 But yeah, I think.

Speaker 1 Is that two weeks ago?

Speaker 7 Yeah, it was.

Speaker 1 That's okay.

Speaker 1 That was the same as the bug. Yeah, exactly.
Yeah.

Speaker 7 Last week. Hank, do you have any idea how sicknesses and illnesses get transmitted and spread? Not from doing flips into the end zone.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 7 Well, anyways, I think I'm going to be a big square on this one. Take the Ravens.

Speaker 1 I am as well. Okay.

Speaker 7 Wait, there's one other. What? We didn't talk about the Giants Saints.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah, that's right. Damn.
Hurricane Ida.

Speaker 7 Yeah, Saints are back. Predicted Jameis Winston's stat line.
17 for 28, 143 yards, six touchdowns. I like it.

Speaker 1 I actually think the Giants might win this game. They're going to win one.
They're in my... They're in my...

Speaker 1 i haven't put the jags in the well i guess this would be time traveling this will look really stupid but i haven't put the jags in they're gonna win one category yet but i've put the jets the colts and the giants in they're gonna win one and the lions actually hank four teams in there they're gonna win one are they in your hungry dog parlay yes okay all right love it hank um

Speaker 1 what do you got anything else

Speaker 1 let's do some fantasy lads we got fantasy lads and we got cm punk or sorry we're gonna do justin thomas then cm punk and then we'll finish up with Firepress of the Week. Hank!

Speaker 4 Hey, mates!

Speaker 1 Hey, hey! Hey, bro! Oi! Oi! Oi! Oi! Hey, Gunner!

Speaker 4 It's Jericho Wilkins.

Speaker 7 I stop on this week.

Speaker 4 It's at lava.

Speaker 1 What? At lava? At lava. At lava.

Speaker 4 The Kilawalawella volcano went off on the main island, so if you like lava, go to Hawaii and get it while it's hot.

Speaker 7 Yeah, well, it's hot, like a spotted tea.

Speaker 4 I love hot lava myself.

Speaker 1 Hawaii. It's spotless.

Speaker 1 Okay, I'm on Hawaii.

Speaker 4 I call him beers. My sit-em is Stajil Simpson.
Hello. PFT's best mate.
Right. Ruptured his vocal cords.

Speaker 4 He's not going to be making music for a while, so if he's on your musical fantasy team, put him on the bench.

Speaker 7 That was my sit-em this week.

Speaker 1 Oh, damn.

Speaker 7 He nicked my sit-em.

Speaker 4 That's what I do, mate.

Speaker 4 My sleeper is Corul Patterson.

Speaker 1 Oh, no.

Speaker 1 He can raise.

Speaker 1 He can catch.

Speaker 7 He can return. He's Scottish, isn't it?

Speaker 1 He can do it all.

Speaker 4 He's poised for a big game this weekend. Oh, love it, huh?

Speaker 1 Pick him up off your waivers.

Speaker 4 Love it, bruv. Get on your bench, put him in your starting lineup.

Speaker 7 Listen. Team crumpets.

Speaker 7 Right, hey, this is Adele.

Speaker 1 Right. Hello.
Hello. Hello.

Speaker 1 Hello. Hello.
Hello. Hello, in it.

Speaker 5 It's me you're looking for.

Speaker 7 My start home is Brittany Spears.

Speaker 1 Brittany Spears. How Brittany Spears.
She's free of spear.

Speaker 1 Brittany Spears.

Speaker 7 She's free of her conservativeship and

Speaker 7 free to make money on her own. Great Brittany, very proud of you.
You shine on, girl.

Speaker 1 He goes. He goes.

Speaker 7 Yeah. My sit-um was Sturgis Simpson before Aank nicked it in it.

Speaker 1 Ah, fuck Aank. He's got a

Speaker 7 throat sore than Tom Brady. Yeah, we talked about this.

Speaker 1 Take a look at this fucking box, Hank.

Speaker 7 Turtles all the way down.

Speaker 7 Turtles all the way down. Bronxy.
Obla oblige, obligator. If the turtles were blessed with a visit from Ricky Aguayo,

Speaker 1 Black Puttin half like a summer sausage.

Speaker 1 Correct, correct.

Speaker 7 Black putting. My sleeper is Audale Beckham.

Speaker 1 Adale Beckham.

Speaker 7 That is Adale Beckham, distant relative of our beloved foot-a-you legend, David, traveling to Minnesota. Saying hello, Governor, to Christy Noam, just next door.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 7 She likes getting shit on all the time.

Speaker 1 In the news.

Speaker 7 In the news that is. Thank you.
Thank you. This was a deal.

Speaker 1 Hello. My name is Benedict Witherstone.

Speaker 1 Hi. Hello.

Speaker 1 My startum is Joel M. Bede because he said I don't get on a scale.
It's not good for my mental health. For your metals.

Speaker 7 For the mentals. That's a lot.
That's a lot of kilograms.

Speaker 1 Too many binaries and mash. Yeah.

Speaker 7 Your chickens.

Speaker 1 Don't even look at your weights. For your kilos, I'm sorry.

Speaker 7 No, no, stones, stones.

Speaker 1 Stones. Stones.

Speaker 1 We're all stone.

Speaker 7 Hounds just mean strike cash, huh? Yeah.

Speaker 1 It's just like burrow to chase.

Speaker 1 It's cash. Cash base.

Speaker 1 Why Sam is laundry?

Speaker 1 Zeth Fock is going to get fucking taken by dog.

Speaker 7 Oh, I put my laundry away yesterday.

Speaker 1 Oh, no. It's just Zach Wilson.

Speaker 4 It's just Zach Wilfin jersey done yet.

Speaker 1 Not GTA. We still do GTA.
Shout out to the family. Brian, boy.
Brian.

Speaker 2 Brian.

Speaker 1 Laundry. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 You got it now. Oh, my holy cat, he's got it now.

Speaker 2 Where is he?

Speaker 7 Is he in the swamp?

Speaker 1 Yeah, he's in the swamp, he's on the island.

Speaker 7 On an archipelago. Watch out for the cross- the archipelago.

Speaker 1 Yeah, uh, my sleeper's sweaters, because it's sweater season now for the big boys, for the big for the units, for the lads. Oh, you jumpers? Sweater puppies.
Yeah, my jumper season.

Speaker 1 It's gonna save us. It's maybe

Speaker 1 you gotta be the one that saves me.

Speaker 1 And after

Speaker 1 all,

Speaker 1 you're gonna be aware of it. You

Speaker 1 talking again.

Speaker 4 Not the Beatles.

Speaker 7 Long live the Queen. Oh, it's Horace Wickerman, Shair.

Speaker 1 Am I stardom Simpson? Horace Aris.

Speaker 7 Aris! Oris, my friend.

Speaker 1 You fucking bitch. We already talked about Sturgil Simpson.

Speaker 1 Are you Sturgil again, Auris?

Speaker 1 I haven't seen you in years.

Speaker 7 All my buddies call me Hor.

Speaker 7 My stardom is terrifying.

Speaker 1 Damn, that's good. I tried.
Are you Mr. Bean?

Speaker 1 Maybe. On the weekend.

Speaker 7 Oh, and my stardom is Sam Allinger. He's back and he's at practice today.

Speaker 1 Practice.

Speaker 1 Yes,

Speaker 1 doing a little footing with the voice.

Speaker 7 He's tuned up with the trainers. He's tuned up.

Speaker 2 He's tuned his little tweaked knees.

Speaker 7 All good. And now my sit-em is

Speaker 7 fans. Yes.
Fans. Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 We've got to change the season.

Speaker 7 Hey, fans are back. No, but fans are gone.
I thought fans are gone.

Speaker 7 It's too cold nowadays for your fans.

Speaker 1 Fans on your walls. Just use them now.

Speaker 1 Can up.

Speaker 4 No, no more fans.

Speaker 1 No free advice. No, whoa.

Speaker 1 Is there an Irish man in here?

Speaker 7 No, it's a Scotland.

Speaker 1 Killed. It's a Scotland.

Speaker 1 I've declared Primanoctor off Billy Coleman.

Speaker 7 Oh, no. Scotts.
So turn your fans off. Sue Cold.
I've had her on since May. So, I mean, that's a big sit-em.
Alright. My sleep is the debt ceiling.

Speaker 1 That's very funny. No more debt.

Speaker 7 No more death.

Speaker 1 Put it to sleep.

Speaker 7 Good night. Good night.

Speaker 7 All right. Thank you for tuning in.

Speaker 1 We should just go right to the ad because I don't know what we can say after that. All right, but I thought Billy's accent was great.
Billy's was funny.

Speaker 7 Billy's was Liverpudlian. Your accent was from...
Horace.

Speaker 1 No,

Speaker 1 it went from this to Scotlish pretty quickly.

Speaker 4 Yeah. First one.

Speaker 7 No, but which one? Then you went back to the Beatles' accent. You're like, the Queen.

Speaker 1 Oya. The Queen.

Speaker 7 The Queen. I actually got a pretty digital accent.

Speaker 1 I'm Roger Pinnett.

Speaker 7 The thing is, now I can't get out of it. Ted Lasso has saved American football.
Jason Sudakis. I'm on it.

Speaker 4 One of us probably should have mentioned James Bond.

Speaker 1 Oh, James Bond. James Bond.
What happened to Connor Devil

Speaker 1 this weekend? Connor McGee.

Speaker 1 I think so. Oh.

Speaker 4 Maybe next week.

Speaker 7 Connor McGregor said he's dead.

Speaker 1 By the way, John Biet is like, he finally quoted it and was like, I hate Ben Simmons too. So that's good.

Speaker 7 I do like the idea of a Ben Simmons, Kyrie Irving, just straight up trade. Just be like, it's a major here.
He's your problem. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah. I don't know what.

Speaker 1 So is Ben Simmons going to just hold out? Is that what's going to happen? I don't know.

Speaker 1 What is he holding out of this?

Speaker 4 Jamie Roberts said it was like he compared it to the Aaron Rodgers situation. So that's what the Sixers think.

Speaker 1 Yeah, this is uncharted territory because whenever you have a holdout or a guy demanding a trade, it's because he's really, really good and his team sucks.

Speaker 1 And he's like, the franchise won't support me. It's the exact opposite.
The team is good and Ben Simmons sucks. Yeah.
So it's like, you have all the support. You are just the problem.

Speaker 7 He's like, we need to get more support around the rest of my team. Yeah.
So I'm holding out. Right.

Speaker 1 Actually,

Speaker 7 I mean, the way that he played in the playoffs, you could probably stomach paying him like $25 $25 million a year to not play during the postseason. Yes.
That might be a key championship piece.

Speaker 7 To not just pass up dunks. Yeah, Daryl Maury.
That's the next Sabermetric Revolution.

Speaker 1 All right, we have Justin Thomas on to talk a little Ryder Cup, and then we're going to do CM Punk, who's in person. Great interview with him.

Speaker 1 PFT, you got a quick word from our sponsor, though.

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Speaker 12 Hard to argue that we weren't.

Speaker 12 I mean, we put up the most points in history.

Speaker 12 I mean, it's selfishly, I might be just slightly biased, but until someone puts up 20 or 19 and a half points or 20 points, I think we have that right at this moment.

Speaker 7 Man, can you imagine doubting this United States team going into the Ryder Cup and like rooting for the Europeans? And then the American team puts up a record amount of points. Nope.
Couldn't do it.

Speaker 7 Not this podcast. Nope.

Speaker 1 Absolutely not. Tough scene.
Yeah. Tough scene.
We were always all in. And, you know,

Speaker 1 you guys played great. It was awesome to watch.
I do have a real question, though, about the Ryder Cup, because there was a debate in this office. How much does it actually mean to you?

Speaker 1 Because golf is such an individual sport. And then to switch over to a team atmosphere, is it...
Is it like this is awesome because it's country? Or is it a little bit weird at times?

Speaker 1 You're like, hey, I don't usually play with teammates.

Speaker 12 Yeah, it's one of those things.

Speaker 12 It's kind of hard to describe i think at least for me i'm not exactly proud of of uh probably what a lot of the europeans maybe think of me while i'm out there but it's just i don't know it's something about the tournament and the emotions that just brings at least for me personally brings out a total different side of all of us i mean i remember you know playing rory last year in singles it was like i mean rory and i are very very close we get along very well spend a lot of time together in jupiter but it's like when we go play each other we want to kill each other i mean we want to just that's that's how it is.

Speaker 12 And then, as soon as the match is over, we shake hands and move on. And it's, um, I just think the fact that you are able to represent your country

Speaker 12 and really show that kind of emotion because we never get that opportunity to just act like a total buffoon out there. And I take full advantage of it.
It's, it's a, it's a good time.

Speaker 7 What about the other side of it when it comes to cheering for somebody that you're used to competing against because they are playing for the United States? Is that weird?

Speaker 7 Because I know for us, like, I found myself rooting for Bryson DeShambo a little bit, which I don't think I've ever done in my life.

Speaker 7 But see, but getting to enjoy him hitting one of those bombs, I was like, all right, that's cool.

Speaker 7 He's representing the United States. Is it weird for you to put yourself in a position where you're cheering for the guys that you usually compete against? For sure.

Speaker 12 I mean, I said that to a bunch of the guys. I mean, especially, you know, playing a lot of matches with Jordan and how good of a putter he is.
I'm like, I can't express how great it is.

Speaker 12 rooting for these putts to go in. The amount of times I have watched him make 20-footers against me, whether it's in a money game or in a tournament or Patrick Cantley or whatever.

Speaker 12 And it's like, I'm so happy that these guys are on my team kind of thing. And it is fun to be able to root for them.
And everybody just kind of bought in. I mean, everyone was,

Speaker 12 their egos didn't get in the way. It was all about the team.
It was just everything was about what can we do to make this week enjoyable and make the team as best as possible. And I think it showed.

Speaker 1 Would you say that Brooks was the best teammate because he was able to stomach Bryson for an entire week?

Speaker 12 I mean, it was impressive watching them get along because, I mean, I think a lot of people are like, oh, you know, it's all for show. It's all for this.

Speaker 12 But I mean, I watched them many times talking, whether it was working out together because both of them are meatheads and feel the need to work out at 9.30 at night or whatever it is. And,

Speaker 12 you know, talking together off the golf course, whether it was eating or whatnot. So I don't know.

Speaker 12 I mean, it definitely threw me for a loop because I did not think that they were going to be that social, but they were great.

Speaker 12 And I don't know if they're back to hating each other or what's going to go on there.

Speaker 1 Wow, this is, I didn't realize that. So it really was like a Rocky IV, like if I can change, you can change kind of thing where they genuinely were spending, let's not say

Speaker 1 tons of time together, but they were, you did witness them

Speaker 1 talking, conversing, eating, not fighting.

Speaker 4 Yeah, absolutely.

Speaker 1 That's why Brooks is the best. Yeah, because he can stomach that.

Speaker 7 It shows that Brooks really, credit to him for being the bigger man in that situation, where he kind of, it was up to him to meet Bryson half took under his wing.

Speaker 7 Yeah, took Bryson under his wing, kind of showed him the ropes.

Speaker 7 Because Brooks is,

Speaker 7 who is Captain America this time around? Because I know that Brooks, he's had good showings in the past. We know that Patrick Reed has obviously came out pretty strong in some past Ryder Cups.

Speaker 7 Who would you say gets the label of Captain America in this tournament?

Speaker 12 I mean, the fact DJ went 5-0 and then put together one of the greatest press conference performances of all time, I think it's pretty hard to not give it to DJ this year.

Speaker 1 The after party's got to be the best because when you win a real tournament, I know you obviously are able to party, but it's usually, you know, your caddy and your family.

Speaker 1 You guys, I'm sure, had a great time afterwards, you know, being able to party as a team.

Speaker 12 For sure. And it's one of those things that's like...

Speaker 12 I mean, even Jordan and I, we talked about it for, it's kind of pathetic, to be honest, for weeks. We're like, I can't wait for that Sunday night at the Ryder Cup.
Like, it is fun.

Speaker 12 And it's, I mean, we had a blast in France when we lost. I mean, we got our asses kicked and we still had a great time on Sunday night, you know, partying together.

Speaker 12 And the teams always seem to end up together.

Speaker 12 You know, I mean, those European, especially those European caddies, they know how to have a good time.

Speaker 12 And everybody just kind of gets together and the golf is over and you're not really, you know, thinking about it or talking about anything.

Speaker 12 You just kind of want to get together and have some beers together. And

Speaker 12 yeah, we definitely did that.

Speaker 7 Yeah, the other big question, I think, coming out of the last couple of weeks here,

Speaker 7 do you think that Max Homa's Fortnite Open Invitational Win should have an asterisk on it because the field wasn't so strong?

Speaker 12 I'm glad you brought it up because I was going to bring it up. But yeah, I think it's got to, right?

Speaker 1 Yeah. Not a real tournament? Do you think that's a real tournament? I mean, we do because we love Max and he's a friend of ours.

Speaker 1 But like, if we're just talking privately, like me, PFT, and JT right now, not a real tournament.

Speaker 12 Yeah, man. Boy, I hate to do that to Max.
I mean,

Speaker 5 this is private.

Speaker 12 You could also argue that it really wasn't even Max because with that mustache, it doesn't even look like him.

Speaker 12 So you could say that like this new alter ego is kind of has one win, and then Max is in another category.

Speaker 1 So, I don't know.

Speaker 7 Maybe the Wario version of Max. It's Wax Homa.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 I saw that you love to pull pranks. I saw that you pulled the prank of like basically,

Speaker 1 was it walking out of a Ryder Cup meeting and being like, I can't believe we pick Phil or something like that? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Did you ever think about maybe doing that with Max, or is like that prank is too far? It's like so unbelievable. No one would actually be like, oh, Max Homa's on the team.

Speaker 12 Yeah, I I should have done that with

Speaker 12 Wax Homa.

Speaker 1 I probably would have started more, but that was fun.

Speaker 12 I don't know what it was. It just was like, I saw those guys that were kind of standing there outside of dinner, and I'm like, God, these guys are going to lose their mind.

Speaker 12 This is going to be perfect. And I mean, all of them literally were just like looking around, like, oh my God, they're going to pick Phil.

Speaker 1 And I'm like, it worked out perfectly. It would have been funny if you did Max and then they just put you in a psych ward.
They're like, all right, Justin Thomas has lost his mind. So

Speaker 1 I got a question. So we're big,

Speaker 1 you know, us. We're big golf fans.
We're big grow the game guys. I want to give you a chance to acquit yourself on the 2018 incident where you might have ejected a fan

Speaker 12 and said

Speaker 12 there was no might.

Speaker 1 Okay. Okay, so I'll read the quote.
I'll read the tweet and then you tell me where it's wrong.

Speaker 1 After hitting his T-shot on 16, Justin Thomas signaled for a fan to be ejected from the gallery for a get-in-the-bunker cheer.

Speaker 1 Justin Thomas said, enjoy your day, buddy. You're done.

Speaker 12 that is verbatim, I think, what

Speaker 12 I said.

Speaker 12 Yeah, it was, it was definitely one of the moments I'm not proud of, especially because it's like, man, people have said some crazy and absurd things.

Speaker 12 And of all things, like, that's the guy I chose to throw out. I mean, I could definitely think of, you know, I've had some people get personal levels of family or something.

Speaker 12 Like, I probably should have chose that person, not the guy. that was just drunk out of his mind that had been following us for a couple.

Speaker 12 So yeah, I clearly would not have had that over, but I wish I could have like made it an interaction to where I could have maybe screwed with him a little bit because it is, it is fun how people outside the ropes think they're invincible, but it's also like, I know I'm invincible in the ropes, and it's fun to screw with people sometimes with that.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so all right, so you're, you're, you admit that you did it, but you also regret it and it's kind of a soft move. So I think that's good.
We, I can, I can take you off my,

Speaker 12 it was very soft, 100%.

Speaker 1 Although I do love the like, enjoy your day, buddy. You're done.
Like you're a baseball ump. You're like, you're out of here.
That's kind of cool. Can you just eject anybody?

Speaker 7 It sounds like you have ultimate unchecked power if you're between the ropes. You just get to point at a guy and be like, get that guy out of my face and they'll do it.

Speaker 12 Well, I think Bryson's proven that, yeah, you can, you can pretty much eject anybody, but it's, it is. And I think a lot of it is that

Speaker 12 it's just to people, like I said, when you're behind the ropes, you feel like you can say whatever you want.

Speaker 12 And I've heard of multiple instances where people get just a personal level, whether it's calling out something in your family or whatever it is.

Speaker 12 And I've had it happen where guys, I remember playing with Rory a couple years ago at

Speaker 12 Riv, Riviera, and someone said something about him. And I happened to be there.
And I just said, I was like, was that you that said that? And he's just like, oh, no.

Speaker 12 What do you, you know, is kind of giving the whole, like, it wasn't me. And all of his buddies are pointing at him.
And it's very clear. And I'm like, no, it's fine.

Speaker 12 Like, I want to hear you say it again. He's like, I didn't say anything.
I'm like, well, why?

Speaker 12 You said it when I wasn't looking, but say it, go ahead, say it to my face or say, say what you think about him. And it's, and they feel like they can't say anything at that point.

Speaker 12 So it's, uh, it is a weird thing, but at the same time, you know, it's kind of what makes the game.

Speaker 12 I think the fact that we're close enough on like, you know, football or, or basketball or whatever it is, like we're literally from an arm's length from each other.

Speaker 12 You hear everything and sometimes your emotions get the best of you.

Speaker 1 What about a sarcastic, you're going to love that? Would you get upset about that?

Speaker 1 Because I love to do that at golf tournaments where no matter where the ball goes, I'm just like, you're going to love that. Is that okay?

Speaker 12 Yeah. I mean, there's nothing.

Speaker 12 I just think as long as it doesn't like go across the line of being inappropriate or vulgar, I think, I mean, anything's fine, especially nowadays, especially with you all.

Speaker 12 I mean, people have gotten so many, so many, whether it's not chance, but just things or phrases or something to say.

Speaker 12 But I mean, I would say the overwhelming, funniest comments you get are from the volunteers.

Speaker 12 It's because, you know, they you'll hit one offline and they're standing there and like they've been thinking the whole time when you're walking up like you know, what am I gonna say and they you come up and they're like oh you're really not gonna like this one.

Speaker 12 I'm like, thanks Ashley.

Speaker 1 I appreciate that.

Speaker 12 It's the last thing I want to hear is how bad like oh, nobody's gotten it on the green from here.

Speaker 1 Okay, thanks. That's great.

Speaker 12 So those are some of the funniest ones that no one really hears.

Speaker 7 What about hypothetically, if you know, this probably never happened on a golf course, but if somebody called you by the wrong name after you hit a T-shot, if they were like, hey, nice shot, Dustin, would you get mad at that?

Speaker 7 Yeah, would that really irritate you?

Speaker 12 I mean, I get called Jordan every single round I play. So we jokingly, um,

Speaker 12 it in Atlanta, I played with with Bryson on

Speaker 12 Friday or Saturday, maybe Saturday, and we were walking off the third, third green, and someone was like, Go get him, go get him, Jordan.

Speaker 12 And my caddie, Jimmy, and I just kind of like looked at each other. We're like, should we throw him out?

Speaker 1 Just as a joke.

Speaker 12 And we got a good kick out of that. And Bryson did too.
But no,

Speaker 12 there's a lot worse things you could call me than the wrong name.

Speaker 1 I know you're very close with Tiger Woods. Two-part question.
One is, how is he doing? And two, what is the best advice he's given you? Because I know I'm sure he's got like endless amounts of advice.

Speaker 1 But if there's one thing that is like stuck with you that you always bring up when you're in like a big tournament or on a Sunday and you have the lead or whatever it may be.

Speaker 12 I mean, the well, first off, he's doing he's doing great. I mean,

Speaker 12 he's progressing amazingly. I mean, it's groundhog day for him he does the same thing every day but i think he kind of understands that's that's a part of where he's at um

Speaker 12 but he has given me a lot of advice he gives me a lot more when he's not playing because when he is playing that's just that's his his killer instinct his nature of not really wanting to tell you too much but um

Speaker 12 it's it's a simpler than i think everybody would think it's just more about like being patient having good body language because i think especially i just i remember at the players talking to him saturday night and he's like you got to go out I was in the second-to-last group.

Speaker 12 He's like, You got to go out and have good body language tomorrow.

Speaker 12 Like, those guys are going to be watching you, they're going to see you, whether you're playing great, not playing great, kind of weight on your run type thing.

Speaker 12 But if they see, you know, me kind of walking around, like you know, DJ does when he's playing well, Rory does when he's playing well, then it's sometimes when you're watching that can kind of wear on you.

Speaker 1 Has he softened a little bit? Because it's got to be really weird. I'm just thinking about this right now: the Tiger Woods,

Speaker 1 everyone knows him as the competitor, this cutthroat guy that you know he always was mentally just way ahead of everyone but now because golf is a sport that you can play into your 40s he has a group of guys now that all idolized him growing up like you i'm sure you like that's part of the reason why you got into golf have you noticed that at all that he's maybe softened a little bit a little bit more uh open to advice you know giving advice or giving tips well the thing about it for me is that this is the only tiger i've known you know what i mean like i i obviously watched on tv and I've all I've heard from everybody is like, he was never like this.

Speaker 12 He like, he would have never known who you were, he wouldn't have cared who you were. And I, I, first off, I don't really know what to say back to people when they tell me that.

Speaker 12 Like, I don't just okay, thanks. I don't really know what, how to acknowledge that, but I just think he, his perspective has changed.

Speaker 12 I mean, I know he, how much he loves his kids and spends time with his kids, but also

Speaker 12 he, you know, he knows that his years of playing are winding down and not only just with his age, but just with his injuries.

Speaker 12 But when he is playing, I mean, I'm couldn't be more serious. Like he just is, he's, he's still that killer.

Speaker 12 I mean, yeah, he's probably going to be more talkative in practice rounds or off the golf course. But

Speaker 12 I mean, he just, he, he's still, there's a great,

Speaker 12 there's, there's so many great instances and stories of what he did or what he has done. Um, but playing with him in the presence cup and kind of seeing him in that mode as my teammate was

Speaker 12 something I'll remember for a long time because he was playing well, and just watching him plot his way around the course and watching him handle his emotions and

Speaker 12 just kind of pick it apart was pretty sweet.

Speaker 7 So, if you're competing against him, a guy that you grew up idolizing, do you have to almost pretend to not be intimidated until you start to believe that you're not intimidated by him, or how does that work?

Speaker 12 Yeah, a couple years ago in his event at the Hero in Bahamas, we were both kind of in contention going into the back nine, and I, I mean, I totally screwed up.

Speaker 12 I was so worried about only beating him as opposed to trying to win the golf tournament. And he had a bad back nine.
I didn't have a very good last like seven holes.

Speaker 12 And I just was, I think I was like tired for the lead through 11 or with seven holes to go. And I just was so concerned with what he was doing that I was just trying to beat him when there were.

Speaker 12 three or four other people I should have been trying to beat too.

Speaker 12 So that was a learning experience for me is the first time I kind of got in contention with him also in contention while playing with him.

Speaker 12 You're just that, that's kind of the tiger effect that everyone will talk about: you're just so worried about what he's doing instead of just going through your emotions and playing like you would any other week.

Speaker 12 So

Speaker 12 I'll never forget that because I remember getting done and feeling like such an idiot and like I'd never even been there before.

Speaker 7 Yeah. So I own the PGA Tour 2K21 video game.
I play it a lot, play it frequently.

Speaker 7 I've always wondered about the selection of cover art on there because it's you.

Speaker 7 You're wearing like a vest and you've got camouflage, like almost like Baltimore Ravens fan style camouflage pants that you're wearing with the golf outfit. Was that your selection?

Speaker 12 Nah, not entirely, no.

Speaker 12 I had, it was probably, it was kind of like a couple options type thing, but it was,

Speaker 12 yeah, that was.

Speaker 12 That was kind of an outside choice.

Speaker 7 It looks like, yeah, almost a little bit of stolen valor with these pants. Were you committing stolen valor in retrospect?

Speaker 12 Yeah, I mean, it was a pair of pants that that I wore once as opposed to a pair of pants that I wear all the time. So I think that probably answers the question itself.

Speaker 1 Did you get yelled at for drinking a beer during the competition last weekend?

Speaker 12 I didn't get yelled at.

Speaker 12 Strick had a good time just kind of messing with us. And I mean, I

Speaker 12 just from being a sports fan and seeing like all the Bucks games, you know, that that's kind of their Wisconsin's thing is chugging a beer. And I forget the lineman's name that just actually

Speaker 12 deletes beers on the floor so boog and i go out there and we're like we just got to get the crowd going and um so we took he it was his idea to get a bag full of beers red bulls five hour energies we just started throwing them up and then they started chanting chug a beer and we just kind of like look at each other like i just don't know if we should do that and then it but like we want to and then the two people threw beers down and we're like we got to do this like this crowd is going to go ballistic and they're going to get so into it so we did it they went nuts and we get done and strick was like, just joking with us.

Speaker 12 He's like, Man, he's like, Now I'm going to have to answer these questions about you guys chugging a beer. And I just looked at him.
I was like, You should have played me.

Speaker 12 That's what you get for sitting me. It's like, if you played me, this wouldn't have been an issue.
So he got a good kick out of that. And I'm glad it all worked out in the end.

Speaker 7 Yeah, you're not on the clock. You can yug if you want to.

Speaker 1 That's fine. Yeah.

Speaker 7 Who gets to hang on to the Ryder Cup? Do you guys pass it around or does it, does it live somewhere?

Speaker 12 I've unfortunately never been a part of a winning Ryder Cup team, so I don't know exactly how it works, but I do think that everybody gets it for a week.

Speaker 12 I don't know if that's entirely true, but I hope it is because it'd be fun to

Speaker 12 go some places or have some fun with it. Kind of, you know, like the Stanley Cup have like a cup party or something like that.

Speaker 7 You should take it to Europe and just walk around with it.

Speaker 12 Just an alpha move?

Speaker 7 Yeah, just like take a week-long vacation in London and just walk through the streets, just drinking out of it on the street.

Speaker 1 That would be good. That's a good idea.
Do you make it now? How does it work for next time? Do you like, are they going to try to keep the team together?

Speaker 1 How did it like, are you kind of on it no matter what, or do you have to keep playing well?

Speaker 12 Yeah, it's, it's just starts a whole new point system. I mean, we got the President's Cup next year, so you know, try to play and get our way on that one.
And same with the Ryder Cup. It's,

Speaker 12 yeah, Berger jokingly was like, can we just keep this team? Like, can we just kind of like all sign these 12 guys up for the, you know, for two years?

Speaker 12 But, you know, a lot of things happen in two-year stretch, but we do have a great group of young guys that are fully capable of making the team again in Rome.

Speaker 1 Oh, well, and Max is on the team as of right now because he's won the only tournament. Well, he's real original.

Speaker 7 He's ranked number one in the FedEx points.

Speaker 12 He's projected to make it to Atlanta at this moment.

Speaker 1 Yes, yes.

Speaker 7 You can't break up a team that scores the highest amount of points in Rocket Cup history. I feel like that'd be foolish, right?

Speaker 7 Unless somebody gets busted for steroids or something, which

Speaker 7 definitely won't happen. Correct.

Speaker 1 The 400-yard drives happen naturally. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 7 Maybe you can settle a bet here on this podcast. What is the fifth major?

Speaker 12 I mean, the players, I would say, is the fifth major. I don't.

Speaker 7 Not the Travelers?

Speaker 12 Not the Travelers?

Speaker 1 The Travelers is awesome.

Speaker 12 Man. Yeah,

Speaker 12 is that what it's between?

Speaker 7 Is those two? Waste Management.

Speaker 1 I think it's John Deere, Travelers, Players.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 7 Jake, where else?

Speaker 1 I think it's those three. So you decide.
Bay Hill. Bay Hill.
It's really whatever tournament Brooks wins, then we just decide that that is the fifth major.

Speaker 1 But if you want to give us what you think the fifth major is, we'll honor that.

Speaker 12 I'm going to go with the players for the time being since it was the whopping one of win that I had last year, so I might be slightly biased.

Speaker 12 Yeah, I see where you're coming from. I mean,

Speaker 12 Brooks might need to start winning some more tournaments then so we can get more, you know, more major opportunities.

Speaker 7 Well, he's coming off of almost an amputated leg.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he's actually a hero. He basically can't walk until he was out there

Speaker 12 and hand pretty much. Yeah, that root.

Speaker 1 That root attacked him so that's we we're gonna put that root in jail i had uh one last question it's not really a question it's more like a

Speaker 12 you're kind of a jerk for the fact that you're like an incredible golfer a millionaire and also you get to root for alabama football because you went there so um yeah that's not really a question it's just like how dare you yeah no i i i get that i mean jealousy is a terrible trait i i understand that it is but um i'm very fortunate to go for the tide and i i was curious for you guys what are we thinking on this college football slate this weekend?

Speaker 12 Because it is unbelievable.

Speaker 1 Yes, it's incredible. So why don't you, because you have a curse.
Last time you made a prediction on game day, the tide lost to LSU. We were Joe Burrow guys.
We're Coach O guys.

Speaker 1 Give us a prediction for the tide versus Ole Miss this weekend.

Speaker 12 I think it's going to be a shootout. I think, I mean, Lane Kiffin is.

Speaker 12 one of a kind, and I think he knows coaches' ways pretty well, but he's actually, although he might not fully be there, he's a hell of a play caller. So I think it's going to be a shootout.

Speaker 12 But I don't think the Todd's going to cover, but I think the win.

Speaker 1 Okay, rat poison.

Speaker 7 That's a little bit of rat poison.

Speaker 1 So, yeah, go ahead. No, I was going to say, you talked to Coach Saban on the phone.
How is he?

Speaker 1 Are you going to say the thing, like, oh, he's actually really nice and funny? Because I love when people are like, yeah, no, he's actually one of the funniest guys. Like, there's no chance.

Speaker 1 He wins championships. That's what he does.

Speaker 12 He does. Yeah.
A funny is definitely not

Speaker 12 how I would describe Coach.

Speaker 12 He's

Speaker 12 serious. He's not.
Yeah,

Speaker 12 funny is not it. He's.

Speaker 12 I mean, he's good when he gets kind of outside the football space. I mean, the time spending with him on the golf course, like he, he absolutely loves golf and he loves that part of it.

Speaker 12 But yeah, like you said, I'm not. I love Coach to death, and he's a great, great dude.
He is, but funny is probably not the first thing.

Speaker 1 He'd be mad if you said he was funny. He'd be like, what the hell?

Speaker 12 That's that's probably a good point.

Speaker 7 Yeah. All right, so we'll let you go, but before we do, give us a prediction or a guarantee.
I'll ask for a guarantee. Guarantee, how many wins are you going to get on the tour this year?

Speaker 1 A guarantee.

Speaker 12 I'm going to go with

Speaker 1 six. Wow.

Speaker 1 We have no idea if that's a lot or not.

Speaker 7 Yeah, it just, it sounds like a lot.

Speaker 1 It's more than Max got. How many are there? How many, 30?

Speaker 12 Yeah, 30,

Speaker 12 probably 35 or I should know that. Probably 40-ish.

Speaker 1 Okay, so that is a lot.

Speaker 1 That's a considerable amount of wins.

Speaker 7 That would probably set some records. Yeah.

Speaker 1 We're trying. Okay.
All right. All right.
Well, best of luck.

Speaker 1 Thank you so much, JT, and congrats again on the Ryder Cup.

Speaker 7 America, thanks. Thank you, boys.

Speaker 12 Yeah. Appreciate it.
It's for America. There we go.

Speaker 7 JT was brought to you by our great friends at Coors Light. If you ever feel like you're always on, you might need a moment to chill.

Speaker 7 If you want to hit the reset button, get ready for what's next, you need a moment to chill. These days, everything's go, go, go.
Nothing but non-stop hustle all the time.

Speaker 7 Work, friends, family, a million pressing social issues, an expectation to be on 24-7. You just need a moment to turn off, hit reset.
That's when you reach for an ice-cold Coors Light.

Speaker 7 It's made to chill. I'm going off script right now because...

Speaker 13 The Pro Football Football Show is presented by the Chevy Silverado, built for the hustle ready for the game Chevy Silverado is America's most dependable full-size truck whether you're grinding through the week or gearing up for kickoff the Silverado is one ride that's always game ready just like football it's about grit grind and getting it done head to chevy comm to learn more and build your own Chevy Silverado I was trying to remember the last time you were on so you were talking about the movie that you were in yeah but it was like right before the pandemic right I don't know if it was right it was before the pandemic I don't know if it was right before the pandemic maybe like a year before yeah That COVID thing, that's crazy.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that happened. It's happening.

Speaker 2 It's not over. It's still going on.

Speaker 1 No,

Speaker 1 I saw Eva Longoria demanded that it stop. So

Speaker 1 she

Speaker 1 issued a statement to the world leaders being like, end the pandemic now. So I think we're good.
Okay.

Speaker 2 So that's breaking news. We'll get on that.

Speaker 5 I might have broken that news to you.

Speaker 2 She'll move that to the top of the list.

Speaker 7 She put up a meme of a bat and just said, bye, Felicia.

Speaker 1 Yeah, see you. It's over.
It's over. It's done.
All right. So you're back.
Yeah. You are back.
I am back.

Speaker 1 When we talked to you two years ago, I think we talked about it, and you were not going to be back. You were very at peace with where you were in life and what you were doing.
So why are you back?

Speaker 1 I'm happy you're back, by the way. I should say that first.
Thank you. Very happy you're back.
But what was the thought process and how did that all kind of unfold?

Speaker 7 Well,

Speaker 2 AEW didn't exist back when, you know, everyone was constantly asking me to come back. Hey, come back.
Why don't you come back? Come back. Come

Speaker 2 There's one show in town,

Speaker 2 and I didn't want anything to do with them.

Speaker 2 So AEW coming back, I think, opened up my eyes to just possibilities.

Speaker 2 And since their inception, it's just taking me, it's taken me this long to warm up to the idea.

Speaker 2 And, you know, I was having conversations with Tony Khan the entire time, like a whole two years they've been in existence.

Speaker 2 And

Speaker 2 I just finally got comfortable enough, and we talked enough, and it made sense.

Speaker 1 So, the moment that you do come back, that pop, we all saw it. It was incredible.
It had to have been like, where is that on your list of number one?

Speaker 2 Easily. Number one.
Far and away, what that represented, what the moment was,

Speaker 2 far and away, number one moment of my career.

Speaker 1 Wow. Easily.

Speaker 2 Easily.

Speaker 2 It's like number one, and then there's a gap, and then there's number two, whichever, I don't know what number two is, maybe winning the title at the garden.

Speaker 1 I felt slightly cheated by it. It was a great, great moment.
The only reason I felt slightly cheated was I was definitely in the camp of when you left WWE,

Speaker 1 every, I would say for about three years,

Speaker 1 anytime WWE did a show in Chicago or anywhere around Chicago, I was like, this is the night. CM Punk's coming back.

Speaker 1 So I would, I waited too long for that, and then I wanted to be a surprise, but it was still an incredible moment. But it was.
It was, but I.

Speaker 2 See, we used that. It was the worst kept secret for a reason.

Speaker 2 That was very, very purposeful. And I thought we did a masterful job.
We sold out the United Center on a rumor. Never once said my name.
Never once announced it.

Speaker 2 In the business world, that's suicide. That's absolutely stupid.
You don't do that.

Speaker 2 You need to revenue. You need to move tickets.
It's a business.

Speaker 2 I thought

Speaker 2 we kind of

Speaker 2 middled it and got the best of both worlds where it was still a surprise because all of those shows where, oh, he's coming back. Oh, this is going to be it.
He's coming back.

Speaker 2 And it's like the boy who cried wolf.

Speaker 1 And then this time, you know, there's a payoff. Also, as a wrestling fan myself, like, you have to have some type of gullibility to be a wrestling fan.
Like, I always think.

Speaker 2 Suspension of disbelief. Yeah, right.

Speaker 1 Gullibility. Yeah, I don't know.
Yeah, maybe, maybe suspension of disbelief, but Undertaker retiring, like, I'm like, nah, dude, he's going to be, he's going to be at WrestleMania in like 20 years.

Speaker 1 He'll never die. Sure.

Speaker 7 Yeah.

Speaker 7 What was the game plan for this one, though? Like, what's the correct amount of rumor to put out there where it's not too much, where it's obvious? Like, what, how do you start a really good rumor?

Speaker 2 I think announcing that they're going to run the United Center two weeks before the date in a market that they've already sold out

Speaker 2 three shows,

Speaker 2 I think, kind of tells you something's up. Something special is going to happen.

Speaker 2 We sold a lot of tickets

Speaker 2 that two weeks, you know, and a lot of them were in the same building.

Speaker 2 The Now Arena and Hoffman Estates,

Speaker 2 they sold out a Wednesday, a Friday, and a Sunday for the pay-per-view. Like, that's remarkable.
And then, on top of that, to go, but wait,

Speaker 2 in two weeks, we're going to run the United Center, which seats, you know, 20,000 people for a hockey game, you know, maybe 15 for wrestling or whatever it is.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I think people were like, oh, wait a second, why are they doing that?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 7 So is WWE officially on notice now?

Speaker 2 You know, I don't know. My take on that is

Speaker 2 they're competition in the same way that, in my opinion, like Netflix is competition, right?

Speaker 2 The only thing we have to do is put out a better product and we win, my opinion. You know, we don't have a show that goes head-to-head on Mondays.

Speaker 2 We're not trying to, quote-unquote, put them out of business. My take on that is: if we just focus on ourselves and we tighten up all our screws and we make our show better, then we win.

Speaker 2 You know, I'm not focused on trying to, you know,

Speaker 2 have

Speaker 2 some sort of a promotional war or anything like that. I really, I really don't give a shit what they do.

Speaker 1 Did Vince text you when you came back being like, hey, fuck you, buddy?

Speaker 5 No.

Speaker 1 No. He thought that, though.

Speaker 2 And maybe. I don't know.
I don't know what he thinks anymore. You know what I mean? He didn't text me when I came back because

Speaker 2 maybe I'm dead to him again, but you know.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 You're a very big fan of wrestling as well. I don't think you could say that about every wrestler, but I know you are a very big fan of wrestling and wrestling history.

Speaker 1 So what do you think in terms of what you guys can do better?

Speaker 1 Maybe a self-scout of AEW, like what you, something that you're excited about that you guys are going to be able to bring the fans along with?

Speaker 2 I'll just talk about my stuff. You know, like

Speaker 2 I won't do sports entertainment. I think my stuff will be as real as it can get because it's what wrestling is, simulated fight.

Speaker 2 You know, and my favorite stuff was, you know, TV-wise is like Jim Crockett promotion stuff.

Speaker 2 Bill Watts, like UWF, Mid-South, like all that stuff.

Speaker 2 So

Speaker 2 when I I do stuff,

Speaker 2 when bad guys jump me in the ring, they're not going to come out to their music to give it away because why wouldn't I turn around and be like, hey, what are you doing?

Speaker 2 Like, stop them from coming in the ring.

Speaker 2 I just want to focus on my stuff and just have it make sense. You know what I mean? I think when you get back to that,

Speaker 2 when you get away from, you know, like, oh, here's this video or like this weird, creepy backstage interview. I want to make it more sports-based, sports-oriented.
You know, when

Speaker 2 Anthony Rizzo hits a walk-off home run in the ninth inning and

Speaker 2 field reporters on the field to be like, Anthony Rizzo, you just hit a walk-off home run in the ninth inning. How do you feel?

Speaker 2 Like, he doesn't wait for his music to play and show up with his own microphone. He just walks on and they have a conversation.
And

Speaker 2 I want to bring it back to that.

Speaker 2 Almost studio wrestling, just on a much bigger scale.

Speaker 2 I could talk about the talent.

Speaker 2 Oh, we have better talent, but you know, but I think the culture of wrestling now is like, you you know, there's people in WWE that want to see AEW succeed, and there's AEW wrestlers that are friends with WWE wrestlers.

Speaker 2 And Vince always fostered this

Speaker 2 culture where he wanted everybody at their throat. He wanted people stepping on your neck to get to where you are and ahead of you and all that other stuff.

Speaker 2 And now I think there's wrestlers on both sides who are like, whatever, let's all go get pancakes.

Speaker 1 Right. Right.
I do, I agree with you that the

Speaker 1 real,

Speaker 1 when you can get wrestling to that point where it is it's r it's real and everything feels real except you obviously know you know the match, it it really gets to a higher level where it it's so enjoyable for the fan.

Speaker 1 And what you're saying, like of, you know, you're watching it and it just feels a lot more authentic and real and it doesn't feel like someone was just like concocting all these things backstage that then you go and read your line.

Speaker 1 Like, that is a a beautiful place that it can get to.

Speaker 2 Yes, absolutely. And you do that by giving talent freedom and not scripting everything.

Speaker 2 And if you have writers writing,

Speaker 2 be like if you had to do your show every day and there was five people that handed you a script and you have to read this stuff exactly.

Speaker 2 Yeah, but you have your own voice. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah, right. Kind of.

Speaker 7 Yeah.

Speaker 1 No, I mean, maybe you write. Maybe you don't.
Okay.

Speaker 1 I mean, we can barely.

Speaker 2 I don't know the politics of barstool, apparently.

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 2 No, but it's just, you know, like,

Speaker 2 how can you put yourself in the shoes of somebody if you've never been in those situations and every individual winds up sounding exactly the same because

Speaker 2 stuff's coming from one person?

Speaker 7 It gets formulaic where it's like, you're going to be the heel, you're going to be the face. This is the type of thing that the heel would say in this situation.

Speaker 7 Yeah, it sounds like more like that person's voice than the character that you guys are doing.

Speaker 2 Yeah, and it all gets muddied and it gets lost.

Speaker 7 So

Speaker 7 coming back into the ring, are there any things like physically that you feel, any limitations that you have or do you feel like you can do everything that you did you know five years ago six years ago i think i can do everything i did five or six seven eight years ago whatever it is just maybe slower

Speaker 2 i was never a guy who did wacky moves and like crazy shit occasionally like i i don't know why i got roped into doing an elbow drop off the top rope to the floor through a table like that shit was a little above my pay grade.

Speaker 2 So I don't think you're going to be seeing that. But I think my style of wrestling was always more storytelling-oriented.
You know what I mean?

Speaker 2 So I think I can do that until the wheels come off, like Terry Funk, you know? Yeah.

Speaker 1 So speaking of storytelling, I know that you're ⁇ I think I've seen you tweet about the Dark Side of the Ring. I love watching those.

Speaker 1 Do you think that you'll ever have your story on Dark Side of the Ring? Maybe your exit? For people who don't know, Vice has Dark Side of the Ring. I would highly, highly recommend it.

Speaker 1 It's wrestling history, but the stuff that you don't, they don't really want to talk about publicly. You know, there's an entire thing about Owen Hart.
There's Chris Benoit. There's a lot of stories.

Speaker 2 I think my story's got a happy ending.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I was going to say,

Speaker 1 but there's a bunch of different stories throughout wrestling history that don't get talked about a lot. But do you think that

Speaker 1 anything from the CM Punk career would maybe be in Dark Side of the Ring?

Speaker 2 I think it could make an interesting episode of Dark Side of the Ring, and I love that show, and I love both those guys.

Speaker 2 But like I said, I don't know.

Speaker 2 I've told my story,

Speaker 2 it made WWE file a Fugesi lawsuit against me, and like I won that lawsuit because everything I said was true. And it's not a,

Speaker 2 you know, when I'm doing the media, this isn't ever a, hey, let's shit on WWE. This is my fucking story.
Right. You know, it's like

Speaker 2 Brian Danielson, he worked there. He just put out a Grantland piece about thanking WWE.
And I think that's amazing. And there's a part of me that, man, wishes I could do that.

Speaker 2 But me and him had two completely different experiences there. And that's okay.
So me just telling my story about my past history and

Speaker 2 things that happened to me,

Speaker 2 there's nothing wrong with that.

Speaker 2 So, you know, I just don't know if Dark Side of the Ring, I don't know if that's the place to tell the story. You know, I'd be open to it, though.
But

Speaker 2 I think the story's kind of been told ad nauseum.

Speaker 2 And there's people out there that they already have their narrative of like, well, I didn't like,

Speaker 2 come on, be a professional.

Speaker 2 Devil just. I think there's people that are like, I don't like Phil, so he's a quitter.
And then there's people that listen to the story and be like, no, wait a second.

Speaker 2 You know, like, dude, dude got fired. Right.
He didn't quit.

Speaker 2 It's whatever. What's your favorite one?

Speaker 1 Dark Side of the Ring? Oh, God.

Speaker 2 They're all so good, honestly.

Speaker 1 I love the King King of the Ring one.

Speaker 2 The

Speaker 1 Brawl for All one? Brawl for All. Sorry.
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 Yeah, that's a good one.

Speaker 2 I mean, the last one they did, Plane Ride from Hell, fucking fantastic.

Speaker 1 I haven't watched that yet, but

Speaker 2 you got to watch that. You got to watch that shit.
Yes. The best part about that is they call that one the Plane Ride from Hell.
Like,

Speaker 2 they could do a 12-episode series called The Plane Rides. from Hell, which is plural.

Speaker 1 Yes, yeah.

Speaker 2 I've been on at least three flights that were just like that.

Speaker 1 Really?

Speaker 2 The only reason people talk about that plane ride from hell is because people got fired, and that made people dig into it. Oh, why'd Scott Hall get fired? Oh, why'd Mr.
Perfect get fired?

Speaker 2 Oh, well, this is why. I've been on at least three.
I was on the last charter flight where they were literally like, that's it. No more charters, guys.

Speaker 2 That's it.

Speaker 2 You done fucked it up. And the boys always fuck it up for the boys.
And that was the last straw coming back from Europe. They were like, no more charters.
That's it.

Speaker 7 Like the Wolf of Wall Street type flight. Yeah.

Speaker 1 See that movie? 100%. No, 100%.

Speaker 2 100%. People wouldn't believe the stories I would tell about people.

Speaker 2 They wouldn't believe it.

Speaker 1 What was crazy about that one? I saw obviously people talking about it on Twitter, but ESPN did a 30 for 30 about Ric Flair that they kind of talked about it.

Speaker 1 So it was weird that it, I guess that's kind of the beauty of Dark Side of the Ring, that they talk about it in a real way and not, you know, gloss over things.

Speaker 2 Yeah, they don't. I mean, facts don't give a shit about your feelings.
Right. You know, like, I understand that

Speaker 2 you watch these these people on television and you're like, oh, that guy is fucking awesome. And it's just like, nope.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 Sorry if that offends you. Yeah.

Speaker 1 So, wait, what happened on one of those flights?

Speaker 2 I could tell you a million stories, but

Speaker 2 I don't want to be that, ooh, Phil's bitter guy. And

Speaker 1 it is what it is.

Speaker 7 But just one would be good.

Speaker 1 The most boring one. Yeah.

Speaker 7 Tell you what, we'll turn the mics off.

Speaker 1 I won't. Well,

Speaker 1 I won't.

Speaker 2 I'm not naming any names.

Speaker 2 There was one flight

Speaker 1 where

Speaker 2 I personally slapped somebody in the face, choked somebody because of what they did to a female I was with at the time

Speaker 2 while simultaneously a female was in the bathroom with two dudes while I watched two guys

Speaker 2 force somebody to chug a fifth of Jack Daniels. Jesus.

Speaker 2 Like they were trying to murder people. Right.
Like, you know, like, not like gun to your head, like, give me your wallet, but they were, like, they were all those, all those dudes, all that bullshit.

Speaker 2 I'm a top guy. I'm a made man.
This is like the mob. All that fucking corny ass horse shit.
Like,

Speaker 2 I dealt with it. And I dealt with it firsthand.
And I'm the only dude who's ever, I'm straight edge. So I was a target.
And you remember it. I was a huge fucking target.

Speaker 2 And I remembered everything everybody everybody ever fucking did or said to me so you wonder why people say oh yeah phil was hard to deal with it's because i fucking have a memory like an elephant yeah and i remember so when i became a top guy and all of a sudden they were like oh you're one of us brother i was like

Speaker 2 fuck you guys yeah i mean you guys are you guys are walking pieces of shit to be sober and hanging out with drunk people you it's not fun you realize just what a piece of shit everybody is yeah well i did and you know and rat wrestling fans out there, you know, again, I know you don't like hearing these stories from me, but I lived it, you know, so

Speaker 2 you wouldn't have fucking lasted one layover.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 7 So did you enjoy your time in the WWE?

Speaker 2 I did, and I didn't.

Speaker 2 Being in AEW is very eye-opening.

Speaker 7 Right. You don't know what you're doing.

Speaker 2 So there's a group of us that

Speaker 2 used to work in WWE and when we're all kind of gathered around, it winds up turning into what feels like an AA meeting. Yeah.
Where like everybody is kind of just like speaking their truth.

Speaker 2 And it is what it is. It makes you, it's a release.

Speaker 2 You're with

Speaker 2 people who can share these experiences. Because I've had experiences that like you, you wouldn't believe.
You couldn't tell people.

Speaker 2 And it's hard to talk to people who just cannot relate to these situations.

Speaker 4 You know,

Speaker 2 it'd be like the 86 Mets trying to talk to like a Little League team. Right.

Speaker 1 You know,

Speaker 7 I would actually love to see that.

Speaker 1 But you know what I mean? The Little League team would be like, huh? What are you talking about? Yeah.

Speaker 2 No, like we're just, we just do this for fun. And, you know,

Speaker 1 well, I can appreciate that because there are times when we will talk to other podcasts.

Speaker 1 I mean, this is very different, but somewhat similar, where you talk to other podcasters or people in the media. And you...
If you do it for like an hour, you're like, wow,

Speaker 1 we sound so pretentious that we're complaining about this shit. But it is nice to talk to people in your field and be like, yeah, you know what? That did suck.
or that is weird.

Speaker 2 Yeah, but

Speaker 2 being backstage, I said this to Renee.

Speaker 2 I was like,

Speaker 2 look, WWE was great. Made a bunch of money.
I met my wife. I was doing what I wanted to do, I guess.

Speaker 2 But being at AEW and the business has changed so much, obviously, that there's no Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday. I was on the road that many days a week for 10 years.
Right. Right.

Speaker 2 And then realizing now that I'll do one week week of TV, and then maybe we'll record Rampage after Dynamite, and then it'll, you know, it'll air taped on Friday. Like,

Speaker 2 travel's different, everything's different. But I also am just like, I don't remember ever having this much fun at WWE because you were just always

Speaker 2 nervous, job scared.

Speaker 1 Oh, I'm going to get heat.

Speaker 2 Like, if I don't shake everybody's hand and, you know, like, I don't know, bow and say, like, there was just, there was a culture and rules in place to to just make everybody feel like a piece of shit and unwanted and you know like it was hard to break through you know and just you know I broke through I'm the exception to the rule you know and everyone says oh the place is better now the place is better now maybe I mean maybe it is I don't know I'm not fucking there but I know AEW is better and I literally am just like man I've never had so much fun like

Speaker 2 you can see it yeah You can see it on my face when I walk out. It's just different.
People are singing my song. I'm stage diving.

Speaker 2 Everybody in that audience who bought a ticket is happy to be there. They're having fun.
It's just, it's a completely different environment.

Speaker 1 That's awesome. And I mean, we talked to Tony Khan.
I could sense that that's how he kind of operates, that it's more collaboration, more people have the freedom to do what they want.

Speaker 1 And if you're having fun, I feel like the fans will have more fun. That's just always a rule in all entertainment: that the fans are smart, they know if you're into something or not.

Speaker 7 Yes, yeah. He seems like a guy that is very much like his managerial style is find talented people and then let them do whatever it is they're best at.

Speaker 7 Yeah, unless you're Tim Tebow, where it's like, Yeah, okay, yeah, play tight end, sure, Tim. Give it a shot.

Speaker 2 Nobody's trying to clip anybody else's wings. Yeah, you know what I mean?

Speaker 2 Whereas, you know, maybe in some other places you work, you know, you get people who are in a managerial position who are just like, nope, nope, nope, nope, not that guy. Nope, nope.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 2 it's

Speaker 2 just crazy. I think the majority of the people at AEW kind of just want to have fun.
And I understand the perspective of like, nope, this is a business. We got to make money.
We got to do this.

Speaker 2 But that can

Speaker 2 absolutely stamp out your passion for something.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 7 Did you sneak into Riot Fest?

Speaker 2 I was helped out. You know,

Speaker 2 I don't want to make too many comments about that because there's still litigation going on between myself and Riot Fest.

Speaker 7 If you were to have snuck in, which night would you have gone?

Speaker 1 Because I was looking at the schedule.

Speaker 7 Saturday, looking at it.

Speaker 5 Saturday, Saturday, and Sunday, I think.

Speaker 1 Yeah, maybe. All of them were allegedly.

Speaker 7 What was the best night? I missed Riot Fest. You were there.

Speaker 2 Allegedly, Living Color was really good.

Speaker 2 They played a really good set. Allegedly, Rancid, who's always good.
Like, those guys, I've never seen him do a bad show.

Speaker 7 Tim Armstrong guitar right there.

Speaker 2 And then allegedly, Anthrax. Oh, shit.
Yeah.

Speaker 11 That would allegedly make sense. Was very, very good.

Speaker 7 Allegedly, how are the Bostones?

Speaker 2 Allegedly,

Speaker 2 I miss them. I'm sorry.

Speaker 1 There are reports that they're my favorite band.

Speaker 2 Yeah,

Speaker 2 I think they were right before Rancid.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Well,

Speaker 1 we appreciate you coming in.

Speaker 5 We're happy you're back.

Speaker 1 It feels very different than two years ago, but it's just great to see you back out there.

Speaker 1 I don't know. I was going to ask a Black Ox question, but I don't know if they'll ever be good again.

Speaker 7 Maybe this year. You don't think they'll be good this year? No, I actually think that's good.

Speaker 2 I think they look like Seth Jones and

Speaker 2 I'm getting Mark Andre

Speaker 2 Fury for absolutely nothing.

Speaker 1 And the fact that he's...

Speaker 2 Absolutely nothing.

Speaker 1 Well, when it's like 50-50, if he's going to retire or not, probably makes sense to absolutely nothing. So I'm happy he bought in.
So, yeah, I think they'll be back in the playoffs this year.

Speaker 1 Let's say that.

Speaker 2 Why not? We'll find out. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 7 But thank you. We appreciate it, man.

Speaker 2 No problem. I look forward to everybody being at Arthur Ashe Stadium, 20,000 people.

Speaker 2 Man, when's the last time a wrestling program did 20,000 people in New York City?

Speaker 1 I don't know. Man.
Long ass time.

Speaker 2 Yeah, long ass time. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 2 Long ass time. Long ass time.
Sorry. I just like to pat ourselves on the back.

Speaker 1 It's cool. Love it.
Love it. Thanks, man.
Thank you.

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Speaker 1 All right, let's wrap up. We got Fire Fest of the week, and then we'll send everyone on their way for a great football weekend.

Speaker 4 Hell yeah.

Speaker 1 Hell yeah. Shout out me for, I almost did a little

Speaker 1 for it to Hank the other day.

Speaker 7 You name to Bill?

Speaker 1 Didn't do it. He came in and he was drinking a protein shake.
that he had made like in like a magic bullet and I or I watched him like mix it and I almost said, Oh, you want to drink proteins?

Speaker 1 I stopped, and I didn't do it. And it was a very funny moment between us.
Credit to you.

Speaker 4 I appreciated that.

Speaker 1 You look good, though, Hank.

Speaker 4 Thanks.

Speaker 7 I think we should spend more time building each other up and less time tearing each other down on this podcast.

Speaker 1 I would agree.

Speaker 11 This is in the future.

Speaker 1 You look good enough for us to be able to do that. This already happened now.

Speaker 4 I was super nice to you earlier about your eyes. So, credit to me.

Speaker 4 My Fire Fest of the Week is: I have, I moved in July. I ordered a couch in July.
It said it was going to be delivered late August. I knew shit's crazy with COVID.
Paid for it all.

Speaker 4 And then about two weeks later, they got an email. It was like, it's actually delayed till late September.

Speaker 4 And I already paid for it. So I was like, whatever.
It's now late September. And they're not even answering my emails.

Speaker 7 Oh, that's tough. So

Speaker 1 they never gave me an update.

Speaker 4 Yeah, it's.

Speaker 7 Truly a Fire Fest.

Speaker 4 Yeah, it's an actual Fire Fest. This is a real Fire Fest week.

Speaker 4 It just kind of dawned on me because I was like, wait, where's this couch? It's late September. Maggie.

Speaker 4 Hit him up. No email back yet.

Speaker 1 Her name is Maggie.

Speaker 7 No, there's a

Speaker 1 Wake Up Maggie.

Speaker 7 Or Wake Up Maggie. I think I got something to say to you.
Yeah, got it right.

Speaker 1 Her name's Creighton Beryl.

Speaker 1 Oh, wow. She's a thought.

Speaker 7 Creighton Beryl. She's a fucking thought.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Fucking name is Nay Barrel.

Speaker 1 That was real anger from Billy.

Speaker 7 I feel like COVID is just for a lot of businesses, it's become one of those things that you can just say, like, get out of jail free.

Speaker 7 Oh, yeah, your couch. We don't have your couch because

Speaker 7 COVID.

Speaker 7 And then what can you say back to that? Right. So you sound insensitive if you complain.

Speaker 4 We'll see what happens. Hopefully next week I have

Speaker 7 a better update. So what are you sitting on?

Speaker 4 I have a giant beanbag in my living room.

Speaker 4 It's pretty empty.

Speaker 4 I have another room where I watch games and stuff, the three TV room. My living room is just pretty empty.

Speaker 4 I don't really spend much time in there, but if I have guests over anything, it's like you'd walk in and just nothing. It's good to just have a couch.

Speaker 4 And I paid for it, so I'm like, what the fuck?

Speaker 7 I love Hank's setup at his apartment because he has a living room, which is where one would traditionally keep the three televisions to watch games and things like that. But Hank made that his office.

Speaker 7 And so your living room is just going to be like a bigger, less cool version of your real TV room.

Speaker 5 Well, you can attach.

Speaker 4 I mean, it's one of those things where in the past, I had one room and I had three TVs, and people come in, they're like, what the fuck is going on here?

Speaker 1 It's like, hey, it's awesome.

Speaker 5 It's my job.

Speaker 4 Right, but it's better to just have it in a room. You can close the door.
Got it. The rest of the apartment looks normal.
Got it. Except unless you don't have a couch.

Speaker 1 Unless you don't have a couch. Fuck, Crate and Barrel.
PFT.

Speaker 7 Yeah, my Fire Fest of the Week is that I switched over to pants this week. Oh.
It's tough. It's tough.
It was a good summer. We had a good run while it lasted.

Speaker 7 I think most of us wore shorts every single day after March. Not me.
It's always bittersweet switching over to pants.

Speaker 7 It just mentally prepares me for the fact that the next six months are going to suck. Yeah.
And I tried hanging on. I tried hanging on.

Speaker 7 I'm always the guy that there will be one day where it's like 61 degrees out. And if you're a bigger guy, you can still get away with wearing shorts into work

Speaker 7 that day.

Speaker 7 But as a smaller gentleman like myself, it really stands out if you're out there in public wearing shorts and a long-sleeve shirt or a sweatshirt when the temperature is like barely cracking 60. Yep.

Speaker 7 And I just figured, you know, it's time. I held on for as long as I could.
But yeah,

Speaker 7 it's always a tough week mentally for me when I have to just accept my fate. That's

Speaker 1 that and the clock's changing this this Sunday. Yeah, that's getting worse.

Speaker 7 That's one that's always a tough pill to swallow. Yeah, it's brutal.
Turning the fan off.

Speaker 2 Turning the fan off.

Speaker 7 The fan's been on for several months, and I just shut it off.

Speaker 7 But I do get to wear the Mugsy Clutch jeans. So that's.
Here we go.

Speaker 1 Billy, what's yours?

Speaker 7 I've been breaking out for some reason recently. Pimples? Yeah, pimples on my forehead.

Speaker 1 I think it's because the sun, the sun has finally gotten to the point.

Speaker 7 No, this is like, so like the sun has gotten to a place in the sky where it shines through my window and hits me in the eyes. And then we call that noon.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 No, no, no. You're like blue.

Speaker 7 You came to the office. So one on the

Speaker 7 it's like autumn now.

Speaker 1 You know blinds?

Speaker 7 I don't. So then I put a pillow over my head.
Yeah. And then I get it.

Speaker 1 And you don't wash your pillowcases?

Speaker 7 And then I get acne.

Speaker 1 Do you wash your pillowcases? You try.

Speaker 1 You try to.

Speaker 4 Well, you said your laundry was done during Fuckboys.

Speaker 4 Is your pillowcase in that laundry?

Speaker 7 Okay, you know, my sheets are fairly clean.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 7 fairly clean. That means what?

Speaker 1 I don't wash it.

Speaker 7 How many times do you wash your sheets a week? This is one of those things that Twitter gets mad about once every three months.

Speaker 7 Oh my God, white people never wash their sheets, which is kind of, I think that might be a true stereotype.

Speaker 4 I mean, I'm scared to answer because I thought I washed my sheets regularly, but once every couple weeks.

Speaker 7 Yeah, that's pretty good. That's fine.
That's fine.

Speaker 7 What about you, Billy?

Speaker 7 Like, once a month. Yeah.
Yeah. Oh, that's good.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 For your age, that's appropriate. Yeah, you're way ahead of the curve.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 But yeah. Yeah.
Jake.

Speaker 7 Wait, wait, before Jake, I don't think we should overlook the fact that Billy said that he's getting pimples because the sun is coming through his window at a different angle.

Speaker 1 No, because then I'm going to put that pillow on his head. Why don't you get a

Speaker 1 pillow on my head? Face mask.

Speaker 7 No, because think about the sun moves in the sky throughout the autumn, throughout the year, right? But like not day to day, like technically.

Speaker 7 Like the sun at 12 o'clock in January is in a different place than the sun at 12 o'clock in

Speaker 7 October. That's true, technically.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 7 So now there's like buildings that are in the middle of the future. I don't think you understand that Big Cat said that you could just put something over your face.

Speaker 1 Yeah, like a face mask that they sell. Yeah, you put an eye mask through.

Speaker 1 That's what I'm saying.

Speaker 7 That's why they give me the acne.

Speaker 1 The acne is because you're putting your sweaty, gross pillow on your forehead.

Speaker 7 Right, but the face masks will do the same thing.

Speaker 1 No, it's over your eyes, not your forehead.

Speaker 7 But no, it's like right here. Okay,

Speaker 7 here's a crazy thought. You should maybe turn over onto your other side looking away from the window.

Speaker 7 I can't sleep facing down my neck.

Speaker 1 Or get blinds.

Speaker 1 All right, that's fair. Get blinds.

Speaker 1 Who the hell buys blinds? I don't know. What?

Speaker 7 Do you expect me really to go into like a crate and barrel and buy blinds?

Speaker 1 Well, not now after we're boycotting it, but you could also just like task rabbit it.

Speaker 7 What's task-rabbit?

Speaker 1 Someone will come and install blinds for you.

Speaker 7 You should.

Speaker 7 You should tell Mincy to do it. As a workout.

Speaker 1 You have to have blinds in your bedroom. That's crazy.

Speaker 7 Also, Billy, I have one window. It's a perfect time.

Speaker 4 Just get one of those

Speaker 4 the shower curtain that extends and buy a little like curtain thing.

Speaker 1 Yeah, put a blanket over it.

Speaker 7 It's a perfect time for you to do steroids. If you're breaking out already, you might as well just do stuff.

Speaker 1 Blame it on the sun.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Blame it on the sun.
Yeah.

Speaker 7 Yeah.

Speaker 7 I've never done steroids. It's just a fun hobby to research.

Speaker 1 Okay, yeah. One of those things.
Jake.

Speaker 10 So all week I've had this mysterious bug bite

Speaker 1 on my wrist.

Speaker 10 Billy's diagnosed it like three times. I don't know if I'm turning into Spider-Man or if it's just a rash.

Speaker 1 Billy's diagnosed it three times.

Speaker 10 Yeah, so I don't know what's going on, but it's not going away. When'd you get it?

Speaker 7 About a week ago.

Speaker 7 Week ago.

Speaker 1 There we go. Nice.

Speaker 7 Yeah, that's pretty nasty.

Speaker 5 Billy said it was.

Speaker 11 I don't even know what he said it was. Scabies.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 7 Jake, we need to get you on ivermectin. Don't even know what that is.
Ivermectin is

Speaker 7 the best drug in the entire world for scabies. I'll pass.

Speaker 1 Yes. I'll ride this one out.
We'll see.

Speaker 7 All right. It's in God's hands.
All right.

Speaker 1 I got a quick real fire fest.

Speaker 1 Obviously, we talk about

Speaker 1 our lives sometimes, not all the time, but this one I obviously need to talk about because Stella, who everyone knows, who has been with me for a decade, who has been with me for all barstool, people watched her in the background of KFC Radio eight, nine years ago.

Speaker 1 She was on this show. She was on Cat Cave Derby.
So she

Speaker 1 has chronic kidney disease, got diagnosed on Wednesday. It sucks.

Speaker 1 That is terminal.

Speaker 1 The vet told us that it is

Speaker 1 most likely months, probably not a year that we have left with her. So I wanted to tell people because I didn't want people to be like, one day,

Speaker 1 it's going to probably take a really bad turn for the worse. And that's unfortunately the genetic.

Speaker 1 chronic kidney disease the vet was basically like one day it's going to be really bad and it's probably going to be over So, sucks a lot,

Speaker 1 but gonna make sure that the end of her life is as good as possible. If any vets out there have treats, I need to find treats that are good for her kidneys.

Speaker 1 Much appreciated. Any tips, but yeah, love Stella.

Speaker 1 She's the best, and yeah, so I want to tell everyone because that's what's going on in my life, and it sucks.

Speaker 1 It's a real fire fest, and dogs are the best, and she's had an awesome life, and I'm hoping that I'm hoping it's a year, but it's probably not going to be.

Speaker 1 I'm prepared for it to be a lot less, and uh, but she's gonna, she's gonna be comfortable and happy on the way out. Right now, the weirdest part about the whole thing is she's like totally normal.

Speaker 1 She's drinking a lot more, which is a sign of the kidney failure, but she has the same energy, so hopefully she keeps the same energy as long as possible and

Speaker 1 some more memories. But yeah, sucks.

Speaker 7 She's been a really lucky dog. Yes.
And I know you'll take good care of her. And she'll be very comfortable.
Yes.

Speaker 7 It is just a shitty situation.

Speaker 1 It sucks.

Speaker 1 Everyone's gone through it. And so.

Speaker 7 Give her boobs for us. Yeah.

Speaker 1 But I know that people obviously know her through the various content through the years. She's literally been with me from before Barstool.
So she's been every moment of Barstool.

Speaker 1 And, you know, back in the day when it was just me sitting in an apartment in Chicago blogging, she was just sitting next to me all day. So it sucks.
But yeah, that's just needed to say that.

Speaker 7 All right. Hope you get another year with her.
Yep. Stella's strong.
Yep.

Speaker 1 Yep.

Speaker 1 Okay. Let's do numbers and then send everyone on their way for a great football weekend.

Speaker 1 97.

Speaker 7 Give me an 8. 6.

Speaker 1 69.

Speaker 5 98.

Speaker 1 18.

Speaker 7 All dogs go to heaven.

Speaker 1 That's a fact, isn't it? True.

Speaker 1 50.

Speaker 7 That would have been highly inappropriate if 69 had hit and Billy had just started celebrating.

Speaker 1 Okay,

Speaker 1 that's freaky. So, alright, so full disclosure: I already did the whole Stella speech.
Oh my god, fuck. What the fuck? That's crazy.
What the fuck is going on?

Speaker 1 So, I did the whole Stella speech earlier in the day for my Fire Fest, and I broke down and started crying. So, I redid it because I wanted to actually explain what was going on.

Speaker 1 The first time I literally couldn't get it out, so it was like people probably thought that she was, you know, it was she was going to die tomorrow. So, I redid it.
It's night.

Speaker 1 The first time we did numbers, it was 50.

Speaker 7 The second time, it was 50. That's fucking freaky.
That's crazy.

Speaker 1 Hopefully, that means she lives for another year.

Speaker 7 Love you guys.

Speaker 1 That's nuts.

Speaker 1 Talking away.

Speaker 1 Oh, I don't know what

Speaker 1 I'm to say. I'd say

Speaker 1 anyway.

Speaker 1 Today's not the day to find you

Speaker 1 shy away.

Speaker 1 Oh, I've been coming for your love, okay

Speaker 1 Come

Speaker 1 me

Speaker 1 Needless to say

Speaker 1 I'm on the senate

Speaker 1 But I'll be

Speaker 1 stole a little way

Speaker 1 So I learned that life is okay

Speaker 1 Say up to me

Speaker 1 It's the better to be safe but sorry.

Speaker 1 of the things that you say

Speaker 1 light for

Speaker 1 just the flame of worries away.

Speaker 1 You're all the things I've done to remember.

Speaker 1 You shine away.

Speaker 1 I'll be coming for you anyway.

Speaker 1 Take

Speaker 1 on

Speaker 1 me.

Speaker 1 I'll be coming for you anyway.

Speaker 1 Take

Speaker 1 on

Speaker 1 me.

Speaker 1 Take

Speaker 1 on

Speaker 1 me.