Pete Prisco, Tom Brady Is Inevitable And NFL Week 1 Weekend Preview
Tom Brady is inevitable and Football is all the way back with an incredible opening night game. Dak looked great and Drew Brees has new hair (00:02:18 - 00:13:32). Weekend preview of all the games and we have a new bet between all the guys that may end the podcast (00:13:32 - 00:43:01). Fantasy Fuccbois (00:43:01 - 00:49:33). Pete Prisco joins the show to all preview the entire league and give some takes on what will happen in 2021 (00:49:33 - 01:34:36). We finish the show with Fyre Fest of the week
You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/pardon-my-take
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Transcript
Speaker 1
Hey, pardon my take listeners. You can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube.
Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music.
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Speaker 1 On today's part of my take, we have our good friend Pete Prisco
Speaker 1
previewing the entire 2021 NFL season. We do our weekend preview, Fantasy Fuck Boys, Fire Fest of the Week.
And of course, we're going to recap what was the kickoff to the NFL season.
Speaker 1
It was a great game. We're going to talk about that.
We have a packed show. It's a Football Friday.
It feels good.
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Speaker 1 Okay,
Speaker 1 let's go.
Speaker 1 And then I can't blame all on the sun. Oh no, we're gonna ride down to Elite Trick Avenue.
Speaker 1 And then we'll take it higher.
Speaker 1 It's part of my take, presented by Barcelona Sports.
Speaker 1
Welcome to part of my take, presented by Verizon, the best network period. The best network period.
That is Verizon. Today is Friday, September 10th.
And Hank, I want Hank to do it. Football is back.
Speaker 1
Football is back big time. Hank, Hank.
Tonight. Yeah, let's pop it up.
Let's pop it up. Tonight proved it once and for all.
All the doubters out there who said football wasn't back. Oh, fuck you.
Speaker 1
Football's back big time. It's back.
You know what we got to see?
Speaker 1
This was one of those just magical nights all around. We got to see an artist at the top of his craft.
A guy that just gets better and hotter with age.
Speaker 1 And then after Ed Sheeran, we got a great football game, and Tom Brady just was lights up.
Speaker 1 When you said magic, I thought you were going to say that the magic of Drew Brees is hair because that just, wow, good job, Drew Brees. Clap it up for Drew Brees having hair again.
Speaker 1
So the problem is... I was thinking about it.
It's a big night TV show now. Yeah, it is.
I like a live audience. I was thinking about it.
Have you read about this? I was thinking about it.
Speaker 1
You have to do one of two options with your hair. You either, well, three options.
You can either just embrace it. Scott Van Pelt, shout out Scott Van Pelt, go full bald.
It's coming home.
Speaker 1 It's coming home. Number two, you have to do what Tom Brady did and get in front of it early.
Speaker 1 Or number three, you can do the Urlacher where you go zero to 100 and you're just like, hey, guys, I was the bald guy. I'm not.
Speaker 1
Drew Brees falls under none of those categories where he was losing it, losing it, losing it, and then popped up. He did the Jason Witten where he showed up and he's like, oh, got a new rug.
Whoops.
Speaker 1
No one should mention this, but everyone mentioned it. He was trending all day.
I thought he looked pretty good. Yeah, you know what? Good for Drew.
Speaker 1
But if your role model is Jason Witten and you're getting into the broadcasting business, not great. Not a great start from him.
But on the field, awesome. Awesome game.
Awesome game.
Speaker 1 Dak, I think, is back. I'm actually starting to think that maybe he wasn't as hurt as Jerry was letting us know that he was.
Speaker 1 That was a game that the Cowboys lost, but one, because you're going in, if you're a Cowboys fan, you're going into this season and saying, I hope Dak's healthy. I hope we look competent.
Speaker 1 They looked more than competent. Dak looked awesome, drove them down the field, which could have been the winning field goal drive, except for the fact that what's the, what is it, Thanos?
Speaker 1
Tom Brady's inevitable. Like he just, he's 44 years old.
He's, what is it, year 22 for him? 44 years old. I saw the stat.
There are now six guys in Canton who started their careers after Tom Brady.
Speaker 1
It's crazy. Like they had full Hall of Fame careers.
They're in, they're enshrined in Canton, and Tom Brady is still playing. And at this point, I don't like,
Speaker 1
what do you say? You can't be like, you can't. He is God.
Tom Brady, I have to say, at this point, like, he's aging backwards. It's Benjamin Button.
He's better than he's ever been.
Speaker 1
You could make that argument. They were showing the stats on how quickly, like, his release time and how far downfield he was passing.
But what, Hank? No, well, Billy was taking... Shout out, Billy.
Speaker 1 He was taking all the
Speaker 1 water bottles off the table that had labels on it. Live audience.
Speaker 1
But Hank, like, you have to admit, it was actually sad tonight. I was a little bit disappointed in Hank because Hank started rooting against his idol.
So, set the scene. We're in New Jersey.
Speaker 1
So, we're recording the beginning of the show in New Jersey. We're recording the rest of the show after the next ad read.
We'll be back in the studio. So, we're in New Jersey.
Speaker 1 Barsdale Sportsbook is live. Nine states.
Speaker 1 Yeah. Nine states.
Speaker 1
Nine states. Tennessee and Arizona.
Welcome to the club. Yeah, Stephen Che just walked by.
I thought we were copping for him.
Speaker 1
So Hank showed up to New Jersey and he live bet the Cowboys. Yeah.
So then take it away, PFT. That's a watch.
And then in the fourth quarter,
Speaker 1
I'm rooting for Tom Brady at this point. I'm the one that's saying too much time on the clock.
You can't let God get the ball back and drive down the field.
Speaker 1 It was Hank and Tim the Tatman, the only two people that thought that the Cowboys hat in the bag because Hank, he's the Moneyline dog king of the world.
Speaker 1 And Tom Brady just, I think he just kind of put it down your throat, Hank. Yeah, I mean, as much as I love Tom, and I truly do love him more than most people in my life,
Speaker 1 I love Moneyline underdogs more. And when I showed up at halftime because I was still at the office editing, and when I came, I was like, whoever's losing, I'm going to bet on them.
Speaker 1
And it happened to be the Cowboys. So nothing personal, Tom.
But it's just crazy. It's really the plus sign.
Speaker 1 And obviously, we have to mention the missed call of the OPI on Chris Godwin.
Speaker 1 Chris Godwin was like so close to having just an all-time, you fuck this game up because he fumbles on the goal line and then the no call on the OPI to put them into
Speaker 1 field goal range.
Speaker 1 But yeah, Tom Brady, like, I just, I think we've said this before, but if you had to bet and you're like, all right, he's going to play for another three years, I wouldn't bet against that.
Speaker 1
It's crazy. It defies everything.
And Gronk. And Gronk.
Gronk was insane tonight. His hands were good.
Speaker 1 But Dak actually, like, he was, I think Dak was almost more impressive in a way than Tom Brady was because we didn't know what we were going to get. The ankle, the shoulder, everything with Dak.
Speaker 1 And CeeDee Lamb keeps dropping passes. He would have had an even better night if he didn't do that.
Speaker 1 Well, that pass that Dak threw, his best pass of the night, was intercepted because it hit off CeeDee Lamb's hands going across the middle. It was one of those throws in real time.
Speaker 1
It was like, Dak, what are you doing? You saw the replay, and it was the perfect pass. Yes, it was.
You can't get any better. It was the perfect pass.
Speaker 1
And if you look at Cowboys fans, this is what I really like about this game tonight. It was a loss.
So the Washington football team is in first place, and the NFCB is still. True, tied.
Three-way tie.
Speaker 1
Yeah, three-way tie. But Dak Prescott gave so much hope to Cowboys fans that they are officially ready to have their hearts broken.
Yes. Oh, yeah.
Speaker 1 Because, yeah, I walked away from from that being like, Dak looks just as good as he did right before he had that horrific cramp last year that put him out for the year.
Speaker 1 So the only other thing I had was,
Speaker 1
are we sure Bruce Arians is okay? I thought he looked good tonight. He's so red.
He would know. He was less red than normal.
Speaker 1 Do you remember the picture of him at the White House?
Speaker 1
I think if you cut Bruce Arians open, it'd be marinara sauce. That's how red he is.
So it wasn't like, I don't know. I feel like Bruce hasn't made the switch from tequila to gin yet.
Speaker 1
And when that happens, that's when the Pantones really shift on his face. But I think he's actually, I think he's been out of the sun for at least the month of August.
Yeah.
Speaker 1
I think he's kind of been an indoor cat for at least, you know, the last couple of weeks. Because when you saw him at the White House, he was like 10 times better.
That's true.
Speaker 1
And Mike McCarthy, shout out Mike McCarthy for being smart, knowing it's a Florida, muggy night. He layered up so much that he was sweating through his entire first layer.
But you couldn't tell.
Speaker 1
It wasn't like a Sean Miller situation where his nipples started showing. He had like six more layers to go.
He's a big-time dad. It's like, you know what?
Speaker 1 You can always take layers off, but you can't put them back in.
Speaker 1 Exactly.
Speaker 1
I had one other thing. Well, first of all, the numbers fucking suck.
The new numbers, the single digits on running backs, on cornerbacks.
Speaker 1 It looks like a bunch of kickers running out there on the field. Leonard Fournette being seven.
Speaker 1 There was that one play where Tom Brady was trying to pass to Leonard Fournette number seven and Diggs intercepted it number seven. And I know people are like, well, you watch college football.
Speaker 1 You're a huge college football fan. College football, yes,
Speaker 1 there's duplicate numbers sometimes, like on special teams, but it still just is not right in the NFL.
Speaker 1
Cowboys had a, they had number one out there coaching passes. That's the thing.
There's ones, there's too many 11s, and just the number one and seven appear too many times.
Speaker 1 They're backup quarterback numbers.
Speaker 1
You see that? You see the number one and you're like, oh, is Taysom Hill in this game? Like, what's going on? I think he's two. What is he? No, Jameis is two, I think.
Yeah, Jameis is two.
Speaker 1 What is Taysom? Seven? Seven? Seven, yeah, that sounds right.
Speaker 1 But you see the number one running down the field, and you think, oh, this is a gadget play. Who's this dual-threat quarterback they just decided to make a wide receiver? No, it's like soccer.
Speaker 1 It looks like a bunch of soccer players out there on the field wearing soccer numbers, which I don't like on NFL Thursday nights.
Speaker 1
Now, there was one big, I'd say like the mojo moment of the game was Vita-Vey. Just Vita Vey dominating the game.
Just a large human.
Speaker 1 And it's so cool whenever there's a defensive lineman that has that big poofy hair.
Speaker 1 You can be really bad, but you can probably exist in the league for 12 years if you weigh over 300 pounds and have long hair and play on the defensive line.
Speaker 1
I looked up what his name was, and I need Jake to pronounce this. This is going to be the ultimate test of Jake's skill.
Vita Vey's full name. Jake, can you try to give it to me?
Speaker 1
Yeah, so I looked it up. I didn't see an exact pronunciation guide.
I saw some people saying it on YouTube, tried to listen to it.
Speaker 1 So we're going to go with Tavita, Tuliakiono, Tui Pelotu, Mosis, Vahe, Fajoko, Faletao, Veya.
Speaker 1
Great job, Dake. Way to go, Jake.
Way to go, Jake.
Speaker 1
I hope that's right. I think we might be a clapping podcast now because I feel the energy in this room.
Yeah, it's definitely rising. It really feels good.
Speaker 1 So, I guess, in conclusion, it was a statement. If this was college football, the Dallas Cowboys would still be in the playoff picture.
Speaker 1
Yeah, no, they would have gone from like the 12th ranking to the 14th. They might have even gone up.
They were right at number 12 and they lost to number one in this fashion. True, true.
Speaker 1 All right.
Speaker 1
Okay, so we're going to get to our our weekend preview. But before we do that, I forgot to say the can't lose parlay before we did it.
So I'm going to tell it to you guys. You tell me where it loses.
Speaker 1
Ready for it? This is the Barstool Sportsbook under exclusives. By the way, the Overs tournament is live as well.
You have to opt in. It's a season-long tournament.
It's awesome.
Speaker 1
$1 million prize in an Overs. Like 100 people get flown.
I think we're going to do New Orleans or Vegas. Get flown there.
We do an Overs tournament, one day,
Speaker 1
million-dollar prize. Opt-in.
It's awesome.
Speaker 1 All right. So
Speaker 1
where does this lose? Eagles plus seven and a half. These are adjusted lines.
Eagles plus seven and a half. Does it lose? No.
They're going to win money line. Okay.
Like it, Hank. Niners money line.
Speaker 1
Okay. Yeah.
Against the Lions.
Speaker 1
Cardinals, Titans over 41.5. Adjusted.
That's easy. Okay.
That might work.
Speaker 1
And then we finish the day. So those are the one o'clock games.
Then you get to the four o'clock games. Chiefs money line.
Against the Browns. Against the Browns.
Speaker 1 I actually like the Browns plus six, but Chiefs' money line to win that game,
Speaker 1 does it lose?
Speaker 1
I don't think it loses. I feel like the Browns could do it.
And we're going to get to the Chiefs' offensive line, which you brought up. I think they're going to be better this year.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 But early in the year, they might not be.
Speaker 1
Yeah, no, again, Browns plus six makes sense, but I think the Chiefs will find a way to win the game because of Patrick Mahomes. That sounds like the easiest one you've ever had.
Oh, my God.
Speaker 1
Don't say that. I can't do that.
Can it lose?
Speaker 1
It could. No.
But it can't. Can't.
If that makes sense. It could, but
Speaker 1
it's not going to. I think it's going to be somewhere around plus 250.
So go find in the barstool sportsbook app. All right.
And if you have a gambling problem, call 100 Gambler. Thank you, Hank.
Speaker 1
Nine states. Nine states.
Tennessee and Arizona added. Virginia's added.
Colorado's added. Illinois, Indiana, New Jersey, Pennsylvania, Michigan.
I think I got all of them. Wow.
Speaker 1 Being able to live bet and watch games is...
Speaker 1
All right. All right.
Let's get to the rest of the show.
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Speaker 1
Okay, let's get to our weekend preview. We're going to do a little fantasy fuckboys.
Then we got Pete Prisco and Firefest on the other side.
Speaker 1
So we're going to talk about, we'll touch on all the games, but let's first introduce this. So we just hatched this idea in the PMT studio.
It is Ultimate Chaos.
Speaker 1
We have danced around it in the last few years where we do, we pick an over and under, a favorite, an underdog. Most people are like, all right, well, whatever.
These don't mean anything because.
Speaker 1
Well, there was that year that Hank had to kill the debutante. That's right.
You had to kill a debutante. But this year, here is the deal.
Speaker 1 All six of us in the room, Bubba, Hank, Jake, Billy, myself, PFT, we're going to go, we're going to pick our favorite underdog over under every single week, four picks.
Speaker 1 At the end of the season, regular season.
Speaker 1 The last place guy and the second place guy. So yes, you heard that correct.
Speaker 1 The last place guy, the person with the worst picks, and the second place guy, the person with with the second best picks, will have to drive from New York to L.A.
Speaker 1 to the Super Bowl, just the two of them. It is chaos.
Speaker 1 It is utter chaos because there's no way to plan out what's going to happen in that last week when it's down to like somebody's going to be second place, someone's going to be third, someone's going to be first.
Speaker 1 Second place is the chaos. Billy was just asking, like, well, why don't you just throw it if you're in second place, not realizing that we're all so bad at gambling that it's impossible to throw it.
Speaker 1
If we were to make our like picks of the week, week, they're probably not going to hit at anything above 56%. Correct.
So I would die for 56%. It would be amazing.
Speaker 1 If I get 50%, I would suck a dick for 56% this year.
Speaker 1
That's my line that I usually don't say on air, but yes, I agree. Yes.
That's usually. I usually wait.
I usually wait.
Speaker 1 I usually wait till I need a win really badly.
Speaker 1
You just pulled the Bobby Bowden third down, ghost game. Or Alar Khan's mom, you know, using Jesus in the second preseason.
I used up my too early early for that. Yes.
Speaker 1
You got to at least wait till like week five for your S, your S extra. Well, no, I said I'd suck a dick for 56% overall on the season.
But still, you wasted it. No, you wasted it.
But on a big goal.
Speaker 1
Yeah. I don't know.
It's got to be specific. Do I have to actually suck a dick?
Speaker 1
56. Love is love.
56. Yeah.
Speaker 1
No shaming. No.
You do what you want. Sex positive podcast.
All right. So.
That is going to be the competition.
Speaker 1
Let's just talk real quick. Worst combos to have to do this drive together.
I just, off the top of my head, I think the combo that is most likely to crash and die is
Speaker 1
probably Billy and Liam. Liam doesn't drive.
Bubba doesn't drive. So that's going to be, and we know his history with cars.
Speaker 1 And he's in
Speaker 1
the lights. Not red lights.
Green lights. Yes.
Yellow. Yeah, I was in a pretty bad car accident like my freshman year of college where like if I'm in the passenger seat.
No, no, no.
Speaker 1
This is way before I got hit by a car. Allegedly.
I was in a passenger seat, and I like put my head through the window where every time I like, I like flinch when I'm sitting there.
Speaker 1
Okay, so I hate Baby. Let's just hope that Bubba doesn't finish last passage.
And then I got hit by a car after that, so I hate it even more now.
Speaker 1 So, so I'd say Billy and Bubba is probably the least likely to survive.
Speaker 1 I'm actually a really good driver, right? But what he just said, he doesn't drive, so you have to do the whole drive. All right, I think Billy would be a world-class passenger.
Speaker 1 Yeah, I think Billy would be, he would maybe be my one-one shotgun guy.
Speaker 1
The most likely to be enemies at the end would be Jake and Billy. That would be an electric drive.
We'll obviously document this entire thing. We had some good bonding on Gritley.
That's right.
Speaker 1 You talked about what your goals were.
Speaker 1
I think the most normal one is probably me and Hank or me and PFT or PFT and Hank. I think any of that combo, it's like, okay.
They're good trying. Good content, but probably not going to have any...
Speaker 1 No one's going to die. No one's going to fight each other.
Speaker 1 Although, if it is me and Big Cat on this trip across the country and you guys are just like high-stepping in our faces while in our car, me and Big Cat will turn on each other very quickly.
Speaker 1
No, we'll turn on you. But I think it's liable that we're just going to go insane if they're going crazy.
Right, but we will turn on them. We might fire them by the time we get to Los Angeles.
Speaker 1
We won't turn on each other. We will turn on all of them.
We might put out a Craigslist ad like seeking new producers. Right.
No, we will hatch up ways to get all of you.
Speaker 1 I would also feel like, objectively, like I would feel shame not going, or it would be weird for me to not go with you guys, just producing, because it's like someone would have to go. Right.
Speaker 1
All GoPros. We just strap the whole fucking car up.
Yeah, right. Okay.
Speaker 1
I think I would. That would give me anxiety if it was YouTube.
I'm probably the most rooting against that.
Speaker 1
The most unfortunate to go would be me because it would just add another three days to being away from my family. That would suck, but guess what? I'm a man of the people.
This is for the listeners.
Speaker 1
Yeah, I did have to clarify with you before. Sorry, I was like, you 100% positive.
Like, you're saying this in September. Yeah, I'll do it.
Make sure, you know, keep that same energy
Speaker 1 in January. Yeah, you do love to drive.
Speaker 1 The open road is actually nice. It's like a meditative thing for me.
Speaker 1 Except where I like doing long car trips, except for the state of Pennsylvania. I was going to say, once you get to the state of Pennsylvania and still have 36 hours to go, that will probably suck.
Speaker 1
And the state of Pennsylvania is so fucking wide. It's a chode of a state.
It takes like seven hours just to get through it. And it'll be winter.
That's how it is. It's going to be an X factor.
Speaker 1
For the record, if Big Cat finishes second or last, I will not. No, no, no.
I mean, you are. You did always have the Mud Wrestle guy last weekend.
I don't know if you even even realized that.
Speaker 1
I'm not on call on weekends. Yeah, well, no, it wasn't going to be on the weekend, but it was.
Weekday, I got you.
Speaker 1 The guy who challenged me to a mud wrestling duel if Tulane beat Oklahoma, and they almost did.
Speaker 1 I think that
Speaker 1 Billy would be great to have as a road trip shotgun guy for two days.
Speaker 1
I think day three, it's like I need to, I consider steering off a cliff like Aubrey McClintock. How much Joe Rogan can you listen to? Right, right, exactly.
Actually, probably a lot.
Speaker 1
How much ivermectin can we take? Well, no. Not true.
Nope. Not true.
Ivermectin, actually, good medicine for scabies. For scabies.
Scabies. There you go.
For scabies. There you go.
Speaker 1
All right. So that's what we're going to do.
It's going to be electric. I think we also should, to make it interesting, obviously, you know, people just don't want to hear us rattle off our picks.
Speaker 1 So when you do do your picks. some reasoning we'll talk about the game that you pick whatever it may be that's how we will do our preview on fridays okay
Speaker 1
so uh let's start let's start we'll start with our favorites and and again let's have discussion off of them because that will be what people actually want to hear. We've written our picks down.
Yep.
Speaker 1 Ink and paper, old school style. Yep.
Speaker 1
What is it Mike Wobon say? I like to get a little ink under my fingers. Ink under my fingers.
Yep. All right, so let's start.
Speaker 1
Billy, why don't you start and we'll go around the room. We'll end up back with me.
And again, we'll just do discussion on each one. No, just a favorite.
Yep. Okay, my favorite is Chiefs minus 5.5.
Speaker 1 I feel like that's just a layup. All right, so playing it safe.
Speaker 1 I have thought about that Chiefs bet, and it's actually, I'll reveal my can't lose parlay, the first one of the season after all this, but I'm a little nervous about the Chiefs' full revamp of their offensive line.
Speaker 1 That feels like
Speaker 1 it could be good, but it'd also be worse.
Speaker 1 Well, yeah, we talk about it with Pete Briscoe, but like it, you also don't know.
Speaker 1
So, I'm still of the mindset with Patrick Mahomes that it's like, as long as you have Patrick Mahomes, then everything will be fine. That's true.
He's just like a nice, warm meal.
Speaker 1 You can count on him. I hate week one of the NFL because you,
Speaker 1 every week one of the NFL, you know that there's going to be an upset that no one saw coming.
Speaker 1 And you know that, but you still are like, oh yeah, Chiefs, Niners, like, they're going to fucking crush people. You know what I mean?
Speaker 1
There'll be one team that loses week one where I'm going to write them off. The teas are going to be until like week seven or week eight.
I'm going to be like, this team's a fraud.
Speaker 1 And then once they start putting together a string of like seven, eight wins in a row, be like, okay, I guess I was wrong about them. What are you going to say about that?
Speaker 1
I was feeling that about the Bucs. I feel like they're going to be upset.
Ooh, okay. Well,
Speaker 1
this is now time traveling because we already watched the game and talked about it. Okay, so maybe it does happen.
But Chiefs, they got to the Super Bowl with that bad offensive line. Right.
Speaker 1
So now they have a new offensive line, which isn't necessarily a bad offensive line. But they did get a lot of injuries towards the end of the season.
So, yeah. But yes, you're right.
We'll see.
Speaker 1 You're right.
Speaker 1
Jake, favorite? My favorite's going to be Washington football team minus one. Okay, that's mine as well.
Yeah. Mine as well.
All right. Great.
Good. Is it yours? Well, no, it's not.
Speaker 1
But it's something I've made an intentional selection this this year, at least on this first game. I'm going to bet heavy on the Chargers.
No, because you can't do that. Yes, that's wrong with you.
Speaker 1 Seriously, that's
Speaker 1 fan card.
Speaker 1 I'll tell you exactly why.
Speaker 1 Because I've done the equation in my head, and I think we've all probably thought about doing this, but I think this is the year I'm actually going to do it because I regrettably have expectations for the watchers.
Speaker 1 But
Speaker 1
I'm going to bet against them because I've made the decision in my brain of how many dollars I'm willing to pay for a win. No, no.
And so I'm going to
Speaker 1 why because
Speaker 1 when you're when you're watching your team, it's almost like a free roll of like you already have the investment.
Speaker 1
So either you bet on them or you just, if you don't like them to win, you just root really hard because that's fandom. I also like the Chargers a lot this year.
A scary amount to the point where I
Speaker 1
was talking to Stu Feiner and I was like, Stu, I love Justin Herbert. I have a future on him to win the MVP.
I have a future on the Chargers to win their division. And he was like, so do I.
Speaker 1
The Chargers are the best team in the AFC. I'm putting all my money on the Chargers this year.
So now I'm like fuck
Speaker 1 I love Stu but I don't know if you want to be in the Fox Hole with him week one yeah no he struggles out of the gate so Hank you have Washington football team I do as well I hate favorites so I just picked those up yeah I don't like long big numbers week one somebody unknown also chargers going to the east coast new coaching staff Washington football team's defense is incredible Fitzmagic, early season.
Speaker 1
Yeah, so that's my pick as well. I think the turf and Raljon might be too good this year.
They replaced the entire stadium. They haven't had any concerts concerts on it.
So
Speaker 1
all the team that's there right now has never had a chance to practice on that field. So it's going to be a little bit different.
All right, Bubba. Pat's minus three and a half.
Okay. Okay.
Speaker 1 Mac Jones, about all the Alabama quarterbacks.
Speaker 1 I feel like
Speaker 1
I feel like Mac Jones is going to be really good. I don't know why.
Like, just the fact that... Because he was like the best college quarterback ever.
Well, yeah, that probably helps.
Speaker 1 But also, just Belichick choosing him and emphatically choosing him. I'm already ready to give him time.
Speaker 1 I think people are going to, I'm not ready to do the overreaction after every game, especially after like hearing Peyton Manning and all these people talk about how you do need a good amount of time to develop.
Speaker 1 Like if he loses early on, I'm not going to be freaking out about it. It's also almost a good thing that he has that.
Speaker 1 And if he wins early on, I'm not going to be like, he's the greatest quarterback of all time because it will regress. The frumpy picture that came out of college,
Speaker 1 that's almost done him a favor because people are like, if you suck and you have that frumpy image and you're on any team except for the Patriots, people are like, oh, this guy's not in great shape.
Speaker 1 But because Tom Brady had that draft picture, people are like, this guy fits our system. Yeah.
Speaker 1 I just keep thinking, like, what is the best possible situation for a quarterback to go into? And it's Bill Belichick as your head coach.
Speaker 1 And, like, they will, like, if there's one coach, coaching staff that's like, all right, we're going to just play to all your strengths and not ask you to do too much, it's Mac Jones. So, yeah.
Speaker 1
I just want to see him fight. Yeah.
Okay. Like, fist fight? No, just battle.
I want to see him battle.
Speaker 1
I was like, what kind of perverted shit is that, dude? No. Do you want to see him take his shirt off and fight? No.
I wouldn't mind seeing that, actually. Yeah, it would be interesting.
Speaker 1 I would, yeah, actually.
Speaker 1
I really enjoy seeing that. What's your favorite PFT? My favorite, I'm going to go with the Broncos.
I like it. At the Giants, Spready Bridgewater, he covers it all the time.
Speaker 1
He's the best quarterback in the history of the league, probably, at covering the spread. Teddy 2 gloves.
Teddy 2 gloves. As Stephen Chase said last night, skinny knees, big dick.
Yep, minus three.
Speaker 1
So the Broncos, minus three. I like that.
I like that. I think their defense can be really, really good.
Also,
Speaker 1
I'm betting against the Giants until proven proven otherwise. Yeah, I'd agree with that.
I'd agree with that.
Speaker 1 Billy, your
Speaker 1 underdog.
Speaker 1
Chargers plus one. Okay.
I think they're going to upset. All right.
So we talked about that game. Did you think PFD betting on the Chargers? Does anyone else have that? No.
Speaker 1
Jake, your underdog. I'm going to go with Cardinals plus three at the Titans.
I like the Cardinals this year. FC West, good position.
Very good. Very good.
Going against our guy, Mike Rabel.
Speaker 1 Am I insane? Or were the Cardinals not even that good last year?
Speaker 1 I feel like
Speaker 1 the Cardinals are a hot team.
Speaker 1
Yeah, they're a hot team to talk about. Everybody's been saying that offense is going to be really dangerous this year.
But I don't know.
Speaker 1 I just feel like I feel like I'm taking crazy pills where the Cardinals.
Speaker 1 And they didn't even look that good for the most part last year.
Speaker 1 I'm not a believer in Cliff Kingsbury. And I also think...
Speaker 1
I can't figure out why. I know Julio Jones is older, but I just feel like we're going to see.
When is the Titans' first Monday night football game?
Speaker 1 or Sunday night football game find that for me because I'm just my brain just thinks in storylines there's going to be an entire week six home against the bills perfect so week six home against the bills they're going to do like a 20 minute segment about how everyone forgot about julio jones because he has
Speaker 1 at week six he already has like six touchdowns and 500 yards well it might be that or it might be he's got like 600 yards receiving in week six and zero touchdowns
Speaker 1 and no one's talking about it. Yeah.
Speaker 1 Maybe it will be Derrick Henry and Julio Jones together, like maybe an athletic freak segment.
Speaker 1 Maybe bring back Rick Riley.
Speaker 1
Get a bunch of like the kids they played against in high school. Yeah.
You can see it, can't you? Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. Okay.
Your favorite. The Steers.
Oh, no, the underdog. Underdog.
Sorry. Underdog.
Speaker 1
The Steelers. Yeah.
Plus six and a half. I hate that pick.
I hate it too. Are you going...
Speaker 1 Are you on Moneyline? Is that a question? Yeah.
Speaker 1 Hank.
Speaker 1
You do hate our friends. It's pathological at this point.
Absolutely not. I mean, the Bills are, you know, a division rival.
Speaker 1
And I... No.
We talked all off-season. It's your guys.
Oh, to the Patriots. Okay.
You guys have talked all fucking offseason about this diet, how Big Ben has changed. He's a new quarterback.
He is.
Speaker 1
He's a good man. And I've bought in.
I've sat here in the producer's chair. I've listened to you guys talk about how good that's going to be for him and how the team's going to be good.
Speaker 1 They already have a good defense.
Speaker 1
And this is the ultimate, like everyone's so high on the Bills. This is the game you guys were talking about.
Here's, though, my mind. In my mind.
Speaker 1 This game, to me, this is the number one fan game of the weekend.
Speaker 1
I think this crowd is going to be so electric and people are like, oh, fuck. We forgot how much fans can impact a game.
True. However, there's something new in the Bills tailgate this year.
Speaker 1
I just saw today. They're not doing the catch-up anymore.
They're not doing the catch-up spray though. COVID? Pinto Ron? They're not doing the bowling ball shot
Speaker 1
anymore. Might be COVID issues.
I don't know. How is the ketchup thing COVID? I don't know.
Yeah, it's probably COVID, though. Yeah, COVID.
Protocols? Yeah.
Speaker 1
Well, they lick the ketchup off. People don't see that part.
Everyone in Buffalo licks it off. They just walk up with hot dogs and spread them over.
They spread all over them. That's, yeah.
Speaker 1 So I think the Bills in Buffalo, that's going to be the fan game of the week where we look back and we're like, holy shit, that was awesome. They look incredible.
Speaker 1 And then they'll probably lose week two against the Dolphins because they will be at Miami. It'll be a letdown spot.
Speaker 1 All right.
Speaker 1 Bubba.
Speaker 1
Saints plus three and a half. Okay, nice.
I think you might actually get four there. Let me double check.
I just looked. Okay.
Plus three and a half. Okay, so three and a half.
Speaker 1
I just feel like it's the 4.30 game, and it's going to be late, close, with Aaron Rodgers driving down the field. Okay.
So I feel like it's just going to be close. Famous Jameis.
I love it.
Speaker 1
I like Sean Payton in a close game, too. Played in Jacksonville.
But yeah, I'm so excited for Jameis. That was a money line special, too.
Jameis is,
Speaker 1
I mean, I'm just so excited to watch Jameis play. I really am.
I'm really excited to watch him be a starter. Yep.
Speaker 1 You're underdogging.
Speaker 1 I'm going to get so mad, though,
Speaker 1 when he does the exact same thing that he did to Drew Brees last year, and he takes Drew Brees out in an obvious passing situation and puts Taysom Hill in.
Speaker 1
I'm going to get extra mad when Sean Payton decides to do that to R. Jameis this year.
Agreed. All right.
Your underdog. My underdog.
I'm taking the Colts at home plus three. Ooh, okay.
Colts at home.
Speaker 1
No word on the roof just yet from Mr. Ursay.
Still waiting on that tweet. But right now, it's plus three.
Colts at home against the Seahawks. Seahawks, they might get my fraud stamp.
Ooh. My way.
Speaker 1
What do you say when you're writing it called? My Way Too Early Fraud Stamp? My Way Too Early Fraud Stamp goes to Seattle. I would like that pick if Carson Wentz wasn't playing.
I'm okay with it.
Speaker 1 Yeah,
Speaker 1 Carson Wentz has reached territory where
Speaker 1
if you tell me the Colts are plus three and who's their back, who's their first backup? Jacob Eason. Yeah, Jacob Eason's playing.
I'd be like, ooh, I like that. That's plucky.
Speaker 1 Like, if you tell me Carson Wentz, he's just going to spin around and get sacked. Well, I think, you know what I've done?
Speaker 1 I've fallen into the mental trap that the entire city of Philadelphia fell into for the last three years, which is I'm convinced that Carson Wentz can be a good quarterback with his old quarterback coach in the right system.
Speaker 1
He can play like an MVP again. Yeah.
So
Speaker 1
I'm already thinking that maybe that might be something that could happen in week one. I don't expect him to start like the entire season, obviously, but I like the Colts at home right now.
All right.
Speaker 1 My underdog is going to be the Eagles plus three and a half. I just I feel like we've kind of written off the Eagles going into this season.
Speaker 1
And I don't think the Falcons are going to be good. Their defense is not really improved.
Obviously, their offense is going to be electric because it always is.
Speaker 1 But yeah, I think we, like, whether it be the new coach or Jalen Hurts or whatever it may be, we've kind of said, oh, yeah, the Eagles are going to suck.
Speaker 1 I feel like that's where they're going to be, I don't know, somewhere in that
Speaker 1
7-10? Seven and one. 7-10.
7-9-1. Yeah, 7-9-1 area where there will be a moment where they're competing for the NFC East sometime in like mid-November.
Speaker 1
I have this game circled as my, I don't know who's going to win, but something stupid is going to happen in the fourth quarter game. Oh, yeah.
Something real dumb is going to happen. Oh, yeah.
Speaker 1 All right. Over.
Speaker 1
Steelers, Bills, 48.5. All right.
We've talked about that game. Good pick.
I'm with Bill. I have that too.
Okay. I have that too.
All right. Four of them on that over.
Okay. Okay.
Speaker 1 Hey. All right.
Speaker 1 I'm going to respect the rules. If I was not going to respect the rules, I would just switch my under to that pick.
Speaker 1
But that's why it's good you write it down. That's where your brain's at.
Okay. Good to know.
Yep. Already cheating.
No.
Speaker 1
You're mentally cheating. You're emotionally cheating.
No, I'm going to bet the under for sure. Right.
But for the sake of the contest, that's why it's good to write them down. Yes.
On the
Speaker 1
man of honor. My overs, Lions 49ers.
Same with mine. Jared Goff, MVP, put a little money in it on the Barcelon Sportsbook.
Something to think about. 45 is the number there.
I like it, man.
Speaker 1
It's great odds. Oh, that's your under? Yeah.
Okay, well, we'll get to the under. So 45, and by the way, the Bills Steelers is 48 and a half over.
So those are our overs.
Speaker 1
I do think the 49ers are going to whoop the Lions just because the 49ers are healthy for the first time in a year and a half. But Jared's going to put up numbies.
But Jared's going to put up numbies.
Speaker 1
Exactly. Agreed on that.
A little fun stat for the Lions.
Speaker 1
They could become the first team ever to beat every single bird team in the NFL this year. Dan Campbell might be a bird hunter.
Wow. Okay.
I like that.
Speaker 1
All right. We go to our under.
I think we've touched almost every game, but let's go to our under, Billy.
Speaker 1
Jacksonville Texans. There we go.
We hadn't touched that game. 45 and a half.
I just just feel like it's going to be a sloppy game. I can't name one person on the Texans, as PFT pointed out.
Speaker 1
Yes, you can. Tyrod Taylor.
Deshaun Martin. Deshaun Watson.
Yeah. He doesn't count, though.
Are we...
Speaker 1 Like,
Speaker 1
we're just not going to talk about it? I have all my fancy fuckboys. Really? I mean, it's just...
No, I'm not talking about us personally. I'm just saying the media.
Deshaun Watson? Yeah.
Speaker 1
And they're just not going to talk about it. Wait, is he playing? No.
No. Okay.
No. Like, that's...
Speaker 1
It's just the most bizarre thing that has unfolded now. Everybody's very confused as to what's going on.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 I think the reason nobody's really talking about it is because no matter what is true, it's an insanely fucked up situation. Correct.
Speaker 1 Like best case scenario for humanity is that Deshaun Watson is being set up by like 25 women making these accusations. Worst case is he's like the biggest pervert in the history.
Speaker 1 of organized sports in America, possibly.
Speaker 1 And on top of everything that's going on off the field for Deshaun Watson, it's like totally forgotten the fact that he demanded a trade right before all this came out.
Speaker 1
So he didn't even want to play for the Texans. And I don't even know if the Texans want to have him play.
No. It's a very bizarre situation.
All right. Good under.
Speaker 1
I'm going to go 49ers, Lions, under 45. And that's Liams as well.
Yes. Okay.
Two quarterbacks and two teams at new quarterbacks. Maybe a little.
What? Jimmy G? Oh, are they starting Jimmy G? Yeah.
Speaker 1 Yeah.
Speaker 1
I'll keep the pick. Okay.
Thought they were starting Trey Lance. That's a research mistake.
That's okay. That's okay.
It happens. Yeah, it happens.
Speaker 1 Go ahead. Eagles, Falcons, the Birds, low-scoring bird game.
Speaker 1
Eagles are a joke. Falcons have been a joke.
Eagles are a joke. I think it's just going to be an ugly, ugly game.
Just a joke. Just laughing.
I mean, they have their quarterback disaster.
Speaker 1
Isn't it a dome? Why is Jalen Hurts a disaster? No, but they don't know. Do you know like Alabama quarterback? No, it's not that.
I just didn't. Didn't they trade for...
Speaker 1
Maybe not. I don't know.
That's my pet. He's an Oklahoma quarterback.
Hey, it's still preseason for us when we're taping this. That might be a sneaky over, though.
It could be Kyle Pitts.
Speaker 1
Just remember Kyle Pitts. Hurts put up numbers.
Yeah. Dude, that offense has probably, what, 10 first-round picks? It's a lot.
They might be nine now because they traded Julio Jones.
Speaker 1
I actually think that the Falcons have the most talented offense in the NFL. Yes.
If this was six years ago. Yes.
Speaker 1
All right. PFT, you're under.
My under is going to be the Jets at the Panthers. Ooh.
Under 44. Darnold Revenge Game.
It's a low number, the Sam Darnold revenge game.
Speaker 1
Yeah, I actually like the Jets' new head coach. I like Salah a lot.
So, especially as a defensive coach, I don't know what the offense is going to look like.
Speaker 1
It's not going to look any worse than Adam Gase. I'm pretty confident in that.
So, but I do like the defense a lot, so I'm going to go under 44.
Speaker 1 The Panthers are one of those teams that I need to see Sam Darnold in a regular season game for me to stop thinking Teddy Bridgewater's their quarterback. Well, for me, it's like the Panthers have
Speaker 1
got low-points jerseys. Yeah.
The jerseys just feel like
Speaker 1
not a lot of points to me. And a low point field.
Although, did they put the
Speaker 1 NFL logo? They took the NFL logo off.
Speaker 1
There's only one field that still has that. That's the metal end.
And that's my under because
Speaker 1
I think NFL logo fields just go under. It's slow.
Yes, it is slow. So that's my logo.
It's 41.5, the Broncos Giants game. I don't know.
I guess.
Speaker 1
I could get fucked by Daniel Jones just throwing like five pick sixes, but that would be my under. Oh, wait.
no, that's not my under. Shit, I'm an idiot.
I had that written down.
Speaker 1
My under is the Bears, Rams. My under is Bears, Rams, 46.5.
I don't think the Bears are going to score 13 points. So I'm very low on this game.
Speaker 1 And you don't think that Matt Stafford's going to go out, and this is going to be his like announcement game?
Speaker 1 I think this is actually the latest in a career that somebody could have a coming out party. Yeah, no,
Speaker 1
I think that the Rams are going to be good, but the Bears' defense is still decent. They still got some dudes.
I just, our offensive line is so bad.
Speaker 1
Andy Dalton's going to look so bad. The game's going to be so bad.
And I'm going to feel so bad. So that's an under.
Speaker 1
If we add all those so bads up, that's an under. Yeah, 46 and a half.
Is that what it is? That's 47 now. Oh, 47.
They'll give me 47. There we go.
Bank error in my favor.
Speaker 1
All right. Any games that we didn't touch? This actually was a very efficient way to talk about all the games on Sunday.
I think we hit them all. Oh, Vikings Bengals.
Only game we didn't hit.
Speaker 1 The only note I have on that is the giraffe named after Joe Burrow died today.
Speaker 1 That's significant. Yeah, so we do Bengals.
Speaker 1
Do we need to go Bengals Mortal Lock? Bengals Mortal Lock. Mortal Lock.
R.I.P., what's his name? How old is that giraffe? Joe Raff.
Speaker 1
All Systems Joe. Joe Raff.
Did they name him that one of the things? I don't know.
Speaker 1 It would be a great name for a giraffe. Yeah.
Speaker 1 The Joe Raff.
Speaker 1 Let's see.
Speaker 1 By the way, it's Burrow with the EOX.
Speaker 1
Oh, okay. You know, it would be a great name for that if he was still at college.
It'd just be Neck.
Speaker 1
It would be great. Great giraffe.
Should we talk at least a second about Jamar Chase being like, I can't see the ball? That feels bad. It might be a little bit of fake news there, big cat.
Oh, is it?
Speaker 1
Did Florio get us? Florio might have gotten us with his classic bait and switch, clickbait Florio. Damn.
Never trust anybody who goes by PFT. Why can't you? It's the original report.
Speaker 1 Florio had a report that Jamar Chase,
Speaker 1 because, you know, the.
Speaker 1
It's true. It's true, but there was a report.
There's a little bit of context. It was so the footballs in the NCAA, we've talked about it a million times with Brady Quinn having a fuckable spiral.
Speaker 1
It's because they have that white paint. It just looks better in the air.
The footballs in the NFL don't have that.
Speaker 1 There was a tweet, which I guess I'm very much part of, like the people who see a tweet, don't read the article, just see the tweet.
Speaker 1
So the tweet was essentially that Jamar Chase is having trouble seeing the ball. He's had noted drops during preseason and practice.
He's having trouble seeing the ball without the white paint.
Speaker 1 PFT, you have the context? Yeah, so the context of that tweet was that there was a question asked where they asked him to describe the differences between an NFL ball and a college ball.
Speaker 1 The reporter asked him that question. It's not like Jamar Chase went out there and was like, hey, just so you know, I've got hands like Nelson Aguilar in Philadelphia because
Speaker 1 the paint isn't on the ball anymore.
Speaker 1 They asked him very specifically what it was.
Speaker 1 And the way that I know this is because somebody tagged me on Twitter instead of accidentally tagging Florio and told me to do myself a favor and buy a tall stool and a strong rope for writing this story out of context.
Speaker 1
So, Florio, that was meant for you. I probably wouldn't need that tall.
That's a text that tool. That tall of a stool.
You should text that tool. So the question was,
Speaker 1
why did you have a lack of focus? And he just said, it's a bigger ball adjustment. I don't want to make any excuses.
I got to be a pro and make that catch. That sounds like an excuse.
Speaker 1 And then you mentioned early on the NFL ball is a little bit different. How is it different? And was that more than you expected? And he just said the ball is different.
Speaker 1
He described why the ball is different. Got it.
Because it's bigger and it doesn't have the stripes on it.
Speaker 1 But he said, for the most part, just got used to it, find out what I'm comfortable with catching and going from there. You know what? The more I say it out loud, I'd like to apologize to Florio.
Speaker 1
Yeah, that sounds like he's having trouble with the ball. Because it sounds like he is just saying, like, I missed the white stripes on the ball.
Yes.
Speaker 1
Like, this ball was easier to catch when it had the cool design on it. Yes, absolutely.
So
Speaker 1
struggling. Florida, I hope you kept the receipt for the tall stool and the strong rope.
I hope you bought a weak rope. Yeah.
Speaker 1
Just a taller stool. Yeah, just a very sad attempt.
Yeah. You crashed to the ground immediately.
A stool that can't be flipped over. It knocked you.
Yeah. Yeah.
It knocked the wind out of you mouth.
Speaker 1 A stool that is nailed to the ground. Yeah, Florida, do me a favor.
Speaker 1
Go to the store, buy a gun, but put one of those old-timey flags in it that says bang when it comes out and then point it at your head. Buy a gun and buy your wife a Pepsi.
Yep.
Speaker 1 And then just have that exchange in your house.
Speaker 1 Okay, that took a little, what? Kendall Jenner? Kylie Jenner? Shout out, she's pregnant again, right?
Speaker 1
I know. It's Kylie.
Kylie? Kylie's Freddy, the one with the Pepsi. Kendall's the one with the Pepsi.
Kendall's the one with the Pepsi. Kylie's one with the baby.
Also, shout out to John Mulaney.
Speaker 1 Olivia Munn.
Speaker 1
Hot. That timeline matches up.
Yep. Yeah.
Wow. Aaron Rodgers has got to be punching the air right now.
Yeah.
Speaker 1
Definitely. That's why I'm taking the Saints.
Yeah. Aaron Rodgers is going to be a game.
Revenge game. He's going going to be mad, mad.
A celebrity revenge game.
Speaker 1 All right.
Speaker 1
Let's do Fantasy Fuck Boys. And then we got Pete Prisco talking all about the NFL.
We hop around with him. A little preview of everything.
Speaker 1 Let's do it. Oh, baby.
Speaker 1
Yeah, we're off to a hot start. Yeah, let's go.
High energy from the H-Man. My fucking name is Lateral McJadderal.
My stardom is arm press extensions. Yeah, yeah, let's go, baby.
Speaker 1
Time to get fucking into season. It's bulking season.
Billy's laughing. He knows how key of a fucking exercise this is.
You want your arms to get big. You got to extend them.
You got to press them.
Speaker 1
You got to push. You got to pull.
Send that to the Taliban, those weak fucks. Fucking triceratops over here with those arms.
My sit-im is Deshaun Watson. What'd he do?
Speaker 1
I don't know what he did, but he's not starring this week. If you fucking drafted him on your team, you don't want to play him because he's not fucking playing.
I don't know why.
Speaker 1
For the record, Deshaun Watson, perverted. Pervert.
Not Italian. Not Italian.
And my sleeper
Speaker 1 is chili. Oh, that's my
Speaker 1
sit-up. That's my sleeper.
I love chili. It's that time of year.
Get out the car. Not yet.
Not yet. Yeah, it is.
No, yeah. Yeah.
Gotta be under 70 degrees. No, yeah.
No. Yeah.
Speaker 1
No. Yeah.
No. Yeah.
Oh, yeah. Chili.
It face football on the TV. It's stinky butt season.
Fuck yeah. All right.
What's up, dickheads? This is Andrew Cuomo. Come here.
Speaker 1 Let me give you a little Sugarino on on here to get a cheat for me.
Speaker 1
There we go. Yeah, daddy's here.
It's all right. It's alright.
I'm starting this weekend. I'm starting Pepe.
That's right. I'm starting Peppy.
Speaker 1
I'm talking Peppy, the superstar. Pepe, the god for the U.S.
men's national
Speaker 1
soccer team. Ulyssic, get off the stage.
Torch passing scenario. Pepe is God.
The new playoff P, bitch. Soccer's number one pervert sport.
Speaker 1 We fucking hold you away from. No hands.
Speaker 1 Oh, yeah,
Speaker 1 that's my rule around the house now. How could I have done it? I got no hands.
Speaker 1 I thought we lost. I'm good at it.
Speaker 1 Not even one in the middle of the night. Play a little pinch and roll.
Speaker 1
I'm sitting every Ravens running back ever of all time. That's right.
They're all injured. They all got weak knees.
Taking E-boys. The offense is going to...
You have to go Edgar Allen throw.
Speaker 1
Never score, quoth the Ravens. Love it.
I'm sleeping. Your grandmother.
Rest in peace. Oh, damn.
All right, what's up, guys? It's Tony Ravioli.
Speaker 1
Tony Ravioli. My stardom is going to be similar to Andrew Cuomo's sleeper.
No, sit him. The Ravens.
I think Barry Sanders is going to make a comeback with the stardom. The Ravens need a running back.
Speaker 1
Every name's getting thrown at the wall. Let's get that out.
Did they get that guy, Jamal Lewis, out of prison? Yeah. Yeah, Priest Holmes, where he at? Danny Woodhead.
we're all counting on you.
Speaker 1
Let's go, Larry Johnson. If he's busy, if he's not busy chasing down pedophiles with QAnon, let's get him on the field.
Even better.
Speaker 1
All right. My sit-em is our weather.
Weather sit-in'em because guess what?
Speaker 1 It's supposed to be like 75 degrees, sunny all weekend long, and I don't give a fuck because I'm be sitting inside watching football like a real man. That's right.
Speaker 1 It's always 71 degrees, perfect humidity, and 100% chance a cold ones. It just bummed me out thinking that that I'm not even going to see the sun on Sunday.
Speaker 1 My
Speaker 1
sleeper is chilly. Don't eat it yet.
I'll give you the word. Hey, how you doing, you fat fucks? It's Anzalone Trendballone.
My stardom is Gable Stevenson, because you know what? He's ready to rumble.
Speaker 1
He's me going into WWE and still wrestling for Minnesota. My sit-em is Jamar Chase.
As we talked about, he can't fucking catch. Can't see shit.
He cases these white lines. Whatever.
Speaker 1
My sleeper, I got a couple white lines for you. Sounds like you ripped a couple white lines.
You're not taking a breath. Test it for me.
He's Johnny Manzel throwing him the ball. Test it for Fenton.
Speaker 1 Test it for Fenton, guys.
Speaker 1 Please.
Speaker 1
Dude, test it. Yeah.
Just get an Archon. No, honestly.
My sleeper is Steve from fucking Blues Clues because you don't know when he's going to fucking show up. Yeah, that guy's a weirdo.
Speaker 1
He's fucking boom. Coming out of nowhere.
Fuck, are you thinking about shit? I didn't actually watch the video, but oh my god, it was so emotional. I didn't watch it either.
I just saw the memes.
Speaker 1
Fucking Deadbeat coming back after 16 years expecting I'm here. He comes and walking in the door, expects me to roll out a nice meatball and gravy for him.
Fuck you ass, Steve.
Speaker 1
Who the fuck goes to college for a couple years? Come back. That guy, like, I like when viral videos happen and you just, our attention span is so low now.
It's so small.
Speaker 1 I just skip right to the memes. It's like, I'm not, I don't, I'm not going to watch the video, but yeah, I'll consume the memes.
Speaker 1 So I kept waiting for him to apologize for taking the shit in that hot tub. I thought he had a drug problem.
Speaker 1
Oh, he's going bald. Ah.
I thought there was like weird shit with him, too. Yeah.
Like, I thought it was a good thing. That might have been an internet rumor thing.
Oh, he sucked his his own dick?
Speaker 1
No, it wasn't. Merrill Manson.
He
Speaker 1
had to leave because of that. He had to get a stomach pump.
No, Merily LeManza got a rib removed. No, but also he had to get a stomach pump because he sucked.
No, that was the Dallas Cowboys.
Speaker 1
I think that was... Atlantis Morcett.
Maybe Lil Kim. That one varied depending on where you grew up.
Yeah, that was maybe Lil Kim. I don't know.
Speaker 1 All right. Anyway,
Speaker 1 Deshaun Watson, I had one last point on him.
Speaker 1 Every year, one of the best fantasy football moments is when someone takes that first guy that's got like, oh, and everyone's just like, okay, dude.
Speaker 1
But they don't know. Yeah, you have that moment where you're like, oh, so morals, not, yeah, you're not drafting a team that, you know, orally sound.
Or they're just that out of the loop.
Speaker 1
Like there, it's like your friend group that one of the guys might not even like pay attention to NFL offseason storylines. It's just like, yeah.
Yeah. Deshaun Watson, lighten it up.
Speaker 1
What if it comes out that like Deshaun Watson organized all of this and set himself up just so that he would try to get straight into play. So he would get away from the Houston Texans.
Yeah.
Speaker 1
I actually think that's the best possible outcome just for all of our mental health. Yeah.
Yes. That if it was just, yeah, he is behind all of it.
Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 1
But it is always a very, very funny moment. Every person has gone through it when you're fantasy football draft when the first questionable character gets taken.
Yeah, it's like, oh, okay, cool.
Speaker 1
Thought you were a father. Oh, all right.
Fine. All right.
Let's go to Pete Prisco. We got Pete Prisco.
We're going to talk some NFL with Pete. We're going to whip around.
Speaker 1 Pretty much, we hit every team. And, yeah, let's do that.
Speaker 1
Okay, we now welcome on our very good friend, Pete Prisco. You can find him on cbssports.com.
He's an analyst for CBS Sports HQ.
Speaker 1 We're going to do a little NFL preview with Pete.
Speaker 1 Pete, before we get to the NFL preview, I don't think we've had you on since our former governor, Andrew Cuomo, did his press conference saying he is not perverted. He's just Italian.
Speaker 1 So the question to you is: are you more Italian or pervert?
Speaker 1 Ooh.
Speaker 1
More Italian. No, I think the pause there is pervert.
That was a pervert pause. No.
Well, I mean, no, more Italian. Much more Italian.
Much more. Wow.
Oh, yeah. You had to think about it.
Speaker 7 I got an Italian horn right here.
Speaker 1
There we go. Oh, he's taking off his shirt.
He's a pervert. Wait, Peter, are you waxed?
Speaker 1 Do you wax your chest hair? No, I don't have any.
Speaker 7 I'm one of those Italians that has no hair.
Speaker 1
He's just like a mole rat Italian. Like a smooth little boy.
Yeah. So wait.
So percentage-wise,
Speaker 1 percentage-wise, 90% Italian, 10% pervert. Where do we land?
Speaker 7 No, 90%, 10%, yeah.
Speaker 1
90%. Okay, all right, that's fair.
All right, all right, all right. So not a pervert.
Not a pervert. No.
All right, let's talk some football. Let's talk some NFL.
We are, this is a blank canvas.
Speaker 1 I guess let's go high level first. Did you do a Super Bowl prediction? Do you have two teams that you think are
Speaker 1 by far the best in the AFC and NFC?
Speaker 7 Well, I don't know if they're by far the best, but yes, I do have a Super Bowl prediction. And it's the Buffalo Bills winning it all, beating the Tampa Bay Buccaneers.
Speaker 1
Let's go, Pete. I like that.
I like that.
Speaker 1 You might be the only person I've seen that actually has the balls to pick the Buffalo Bills to win. Everyone's like, the Bills are, you know, they're my team that you got to watch out for.
Speaker 1 They're going to be in the hunt, but everyone has the Chiefs beating them in the AFC. But you think this is the year that it gets done in Buffalo?
Speaker 7 Well, for a couple of reasons. One being, I think Josh Allen's only scratching the surface of what he's going to be as a quarterback.
Speaker 7 And, you know, all that running around stuff he does and the called runs and everything, those are going to be, there's not going to be as many as those this year because he's going to be better in the pocket.
Speaker 7 He's going to go through his progressions better. He's going to become a better quarterback.
Speaker 7 And then on the other side of the ball, the one thing they got to be able to do when you play Patrick Mahomes is knock him down. Well, they've added a bunch of guys that can knock him down.
Speaker 7
Russo, Boogie Basham. I think Epinesa is going to have a big year.
They're going to be much better on defense. And I think Sean McDermott is one of the most underrated coaches in the NFL.
Speaker 1 Okay, I agree with you there. I like the Bills love.
Speaker 1
Let's use that to then go to the other team that you just mentioned, the Kansas City Chiefs. Are you buying? The whole storyline is the revamped offensive line.
Are you buying this?
Speaker 1
Because I know looking at it, they have five new guys. Like, and that's very rare to just completely wash away your offensive line.
No continuity.
Speaker 1 Are you buying this Chiefs' offensive line, getting them back to? I mean, look, they went to the Super Bowl last year.
Speaker 1 It's not like they were bad, but that clearly was their weakness that did them in. Are you buying it?
Speaker 7 Well, on paper, I'd say, look, they're going to be better. But
Speaker 7 remember, there's three guys on that line that have never taken an NFL snap in a game. The center, Creed Humphrey, the right guard Smith, and the right tackle.
Speaker 7 They've never played in an NFL game. And so to sit here and say with 100% certainty, they're going to be better
Speaker 7
would be mistaken. I think you got to let it play out.
But on paper, do they have a chance to be significantly better? Yes.
Speaker 7 Because I think sometimes we get caught up in older guys.
Speaker 7
And I'll use the Steelers as another example, by the way. The line last year was a disaster, and they got a bunch of young guys playing now.
It can't be any worse than what it was.
Speaker 7 And it's not going to be any worse for Kansas City than it was in the Super Bowl. I can guarantee you that.
Speaker 7 But again, until we see them on the field together they're talented but you know that takes time for a group to mesh yeah give me a team um give me give me your rookies of the year who do you think are going to be the most impactful rookies are you a big mac jones guy i think mac jones is going to be good um trevor lawrence gonna be rookie of the year because they're gonna be bad on defense so he'll throw for a lot of yards because they're gonna have to play from behind and so i think he's gonna be the rookie of the year uh on on the offensive side of the ball i think defensively i think joe tryon is gonna be the rookie of the year on that kid's unblockable And it just depends on how much, how many reps he's going to get because they have other guys in Shaq Barrett and Jason Pierre Paul who can rush the passer.
Speaker 7 But of all the guys I saw in training camp, he was the most impressive rookie of all of them. I mean, he was unblockable at times.
Speaker 7 And he's working against two good tackles in practice most of the time.
Speaker 1 Yeah. What do you think about the fact that Trevor Lawrence hasn't played from behind that much? This is going to be unfamiliar ground for him.
Speaker 7 Good question. You know, and I've had some people, it's a good point you make because
Speaker 7 I've had some GMs in the league actually say, What's he going to be like when he has some things he has to overcome? Because he's never, he never did it in high school, he never did it in college.
Speaker 7
Yeah, that's a very good assessment. He'll do it, he'll have to do it week one, by the way.
Yeah, yeah, because I think that's going to be a tough game for them against the Texans on the road.
Speaker 1 Like, I mean, just let's throw out a random name like Sam Ellinger, right? If he gets time with the Colts, he's been in games where he's been behind, he's been in games that he's lost.
Speaker 1 Like, he has that seasoned veteran feel to him, right?
Speaker 7 Yeah, and but but again, this kid is so super talented that I don't think Sam Ellinger?
Speaker 1
No. Oh, Trevor Lawrence.
Got it. All right.
Speaker 7 Trevor Lawrence is going to be, he'll be a superstar quarterback in this league, but you're, it is a good point because he's never had to deal with it. Yeah.
Speaker 7 And until you have to deal with it, you don't know.
Speaker 1 So you just said that he might be playing from behind against the Texans this week.
Speaker 1 Are you taking like the over? Last I checked, what was the Texans over under
Speaker 1 four, three and a half, three and a half games this season?
Speaker 1 I can't really name any players on the Texans that aren't their running backs or their quarterbacks. Yeah, I was going to say Tyrod Taylor and Deshaun Watson and Mark Ingram.
Speaker 1 They've got the Johnson brothers. Johnson Johnson, David Duke, Backfield.
Speaker 1 No.
Speaker 1
No, they have Mark Ingram. No, but they brought Mark Ingram and they have Philip Lindsey now.
They brought Duke back, I think, on the practice squad.
Speaker 7 No, Jacksonville just brought Duke back.
Speaker 1 Oh, really? Okay, this is breaking news. Okay.
Speaker 1 So anyway, I don't know the Texans.
Speaker 7 When you look at the Texans, on paper, it's not a pretty team. But there's a lot of veterans who have played games.
Speaker 7 And so week in and week out, I think they're going going to be feisty early in the season. And they're not going to win a lot of games, but they're going to be feisty in games.
Speaker 7 They're going to be a pain in the butt for teams.
Speaker 7 Then at the end of the year, when they start losing all those games, then those veterans will start booking those trips to Cancun and Aruba, and then they won't be very good at the end.
Speaker 1 That's why we're going to be able to do that.
Speaker 1 The give-up point that happens.
Speaker 1 I was just going to say, on the Texans front, I kind of agree with Pete that they've become like so much of the butt of every single joke about the NFL season this year that they're going to cover the spread at least in a few games where you might think that they might not, not, where they might be
Speaker 1 classed. Week one, I feel like they're almost a good value team to bet on at this point.
Speaker 1 And as the season goes on, they're going to get worse and worse, not just for the reasons you said, Pete, but I think that the Texans, what they've done is they've just acquired a bunch of players that they think in the back of their mind will
Speaker 1 get something for them over the course of the season.
Speaker 1 They'll be able to trade away like a quarter of their roster because they've got all these vets and get some picks back, some like second-day picks, and try to build for the future that way.
Speaker 7 Well, they already traded, they traded Bradley Robey today, right? So, I mean, yeah, I mean, look, the obvious question is: are they tanking?
Speaker 1 Yeah, well, you can't, you can't tank in the NFL. You can't truly tank in the NFL because, like you said, guys are playing for their next contract, right?
Speaker 7 Because you can't tank because once guys get out there, they play their, because they got to play because you're going to get hurt if you don't play.
Speaker 1 I get it, I understand.
Speaker 7 But I think, I'm telling you, I think the Texans are going to be tough out week in and week out. They just won't win a lot of games.
Speaker 1 Okay, so then tell me this because we're on bad teams. Which team will be picking first in next year's draft?
Speaker 1
The Lions. Okay.
I was going to say, it's probably,
Speaker 1 you know, if you're picking from a group, it's the Lions, the Jaguars, maybe the Jets. Yeah, unless Zach Wilson is incredible.
Speaker 1 I'm trying to think who else. Oh, no, wait.
Speaker 7
Okay, so if Zach Wilson's incredible, they won't be picking last. But if Trevor Lawrence is incredible, the Jaguars won't be picking first.
I mean, right? You would agree with that.
Speaker 1 Yeah, I think the Jets, I mean, doesn't it feel like the Jets might have a little bit more on defense than the Jaguars right now?
Speaker 7 No.
Speaker 1 Because the Jaguars' defense completely changed.
Speaker 7 Yeah, but they got, okay, the Jaguars, if you look at it position by position, the Jaguars' corners are better, significantly better.
Speaker 1
Yeah, you know, you're right, and they play in the South, the AFC South. The AFC East is going to be very competitive.
Yeah, I agree. Do you agree? Do you think
Speaker 1 if I had to give you gun to your head, Dolphins or Patriots, one of those teams makes the playoffs? Which one are you picking? patriots really you believe in
Speaker 7 yeah because i think their their offensive line is significantly better i think defensively they've added gotten you know they get high tower back but they also get a bunch of guys like joss uce is going to have a great year for them and belichek knows defense and you know the concern is what do you do throwing the football because the receivers aren't great i think they're going to run the ball I think Harris is going to have a monster year behind that offensive line.
Speaker 7 They'll take the pressure off Mac Jones. He'll get comfortable at the end of the year, and they're going to be a playoff team.
Speaker 1 Well, here's a here's a quick trivia question for you, Pete. Who was the last rookie quarterback to win a playoff game?
Speaker 7 Was it Sanchez?
Speaker 1 Nope.
Speaker 7 Who was it?
Speaker 1 It's your boy, Russell Wilson.
Speaker 1 In that game against the former Washington Redskins football team, when it was him and RG3, the game I believe you dubbed the toilet bowl because it was just going to be read options and you thought that that trend would go away.
Speaker 7 Yeah, and if I'm not mistaken, the read option did go away in Washington that day.
Speaker 1
It did, yeah. Well, that had more to do with the field.
Yeah, FedEx Field won that game. Rao John won football team zero.
Speaker 7 But that was never, he was never the same after that.
Speaker 1 I know, I know. But that, I think that had less to do with the actual style of football that they were playing that day and more to do with the surface of the field.
Speaker 7 You remember the toilet ball reference.
Speaker 1
I like that. I do, yeah.
That's when I saw your takes, and I was like, I like this guy. I think me and this guy can butt heads.
Also, because we're the same height. Yeah.
Speaker 1 5'1.
Speaker 1 Pete, give me the team or teams, maybe go AFC and NFC, that you'll be most disappointed in.
Speaker 7 Most disappointed in?
Speaker 7 That I'm going to be disappointed?
Speaker 1
Or that the world is going to be disappointed. They have high expectations.
Okay, so the Rams. So are you of the mindset? The Rams obviously have some great top-end talent.
Speaker 1
They probably don't have the depth. And Stafford has to be...
We were talking about this about a month ago. Like, Stafford, I've always thought Stafford's good.
Speaker 1 I've always thought he's better than, you know, what the Lions were able to put around him. But
Speaker 1 what if he's not as good as people expect him to be in Sean McVay's offense and with the Rams? Because this is kind of, this is it for him. Like, this is the big step up.
Speaker 1 Everything's supposed to be in place for him. He's got to perform really, really well this year.
Speaker 7
Well, there's a lot of pressure on him. And I'm in the Matt Stafford camp.
I think Matt Stafford's a heck of a quarterback. I think he's been underappreciated, to be honest with you.
Speaker 7 But that you mentioned the depth, and that's going to be the key for them. When you're so top heavy, the way they are, I mean, what do they have?
Speaker 7 Three other players, Stafford, Donald, and Jalen Ramsey, take up a ton of their cap room. And so you better be good filling in all those gaps.
Speaker 7
And I think it's just too easy to say, oh, well, Matt Stafford's there with John McVay. They're going to the Super Bowl.
I don't, I'm not in that camp.
Speaker 7
I think, in fact, I think the 49ers are going to win the division, no matter who plays quarterback. And I think it's going to be Jimmy Garoppolo.
It should be Jimmy Garoppolo.
Speaker 7 I think the 49ers will win win that division i think the rams are going to be struggling a little bit in that division that nfc west will probably be the most competitive division in terms of there's not really a team that you can look at be like all right that's an easy out right there what about in the afc what's the team that's going to be the most disappointing the colts i think ah okay because i i think that i think normally i'm not bullish on the titans because i think they're that team that's always playing that run heavy offense and and playing solid defense and you make the postseason but you're not going to really make the true run because of the style of play but they're throwing the ball around a little bit more now and i think that's going to change them they have to rush the passer better to be a deep deep playoff team but i think in that division they're the better team and most people a lot of people are picking the colts and so i'm concerned about the colts with carson went is he ready to take the next step who are the weapons ty hilton's down i know pittman's a good player but they need more speed outside So the Colts are the team that's a little concerning to me.
Speaker 1 Okay.
Speaker 1 What about another team that is getting obviously a lot of buzz? It feels like this is the first year where you can really say, like, the Browns, you know, they've had
Speaker 1 some
Speaker 1
preseason excitement in the past where people want to wheel them to being good. They are good.
They're a good football team.
Speaker 1 Do you think that they will be able to replicate last year in terms of winning a playoff game, you know, going to the playoffs, all these things? Like, is this going to... Because
Speaker 1
I want the Browns to be good. I'm rooting for Baker Mayfield.
I do think the Odell thing is not talked about and very weird that he was significantly better without Odell.
Speaker 1 What are your thoughts on the Browns?
Speaker 7 I think they're the best team in the division.
Speaker 7 I don't think there's any doubt about that. But again, how do you handle expectations? This is a team that hasn't had to handle them.
Speaker 1 Right.
Speaker 7
And so you don't know. It's one of those unknowns.
And I'm a big believer in Kevin Stefanski. I think he's a heck of a coach.
Speaker 7
I think what he's done with that team, turning it around, is a heck of a job. But now you have expectations.
It's one thing to take a bad team and make it better.
Speaker 7
Now you have to take the good team and keep it there and make it even a little bit better. And that's a challenge.
You mentioned Odell Beckham.
Speaker 7 Look, I'm not going to, I'm never going to be in the camp saying, oh, they're better off not having Odell Beckham because I don't believe that. He's a heck of a player.
Speaker 7
It's just a matter of making it work. And I think Kevin Stavansky will make it work.
They're the best team in that division. I don't know if they're good enough to get to the championship game.
Speaker 7 I think they're just a little bit off from doing that, but they're going to be a tough, tough team every single week.
Speaker 1 What about Team Out West? I've actually got the Chargers winning that division this year. I put a future on them.
Speaker 1
I like the Chargers a lot. I like their new head coach.
I like Herbert. I like their defense getting healthy.
Speaker 1 I mean, it is the Chargers, so, you know, like you can set your watch that after, you know, the second week in October, they'll have some significant,
Speaker 1
whether it's an injury or just bad luck that happens to them. They had a lot of bad luck.
But I think that the Chargers are talented enough right now. I think their coaching is good enough.
Speaker 1 And I really like
Speaker 1 the offensive coordinator that they've got, Lombardi, right?
Speaker 1
From the Saints. From the Saints.
So can you talk me out of the Chargers? Because I put a decent future down on them to win that division and for Herbert to win the MVP.
Speaker 7 I'll talk you out of it by saying the Chiefs are in that division.
Speaker 1 Yep.
Speaker 7
Yeah, that's reason enough to talk you out of that. Look, I'm with you.
I think Herbert's a star in waiting. I really do.
I think he's special. All these people saying he might have a sophomore slump.
Speaker 7
I don't buy it. I think their offensive line is going to be significantly better.
They haven't been good on the offensive line for a long time. Phillip Rivers took a beating there.
Speaker 7
And then last year, they struggled. They're going to be good on offense.
I'm with you on that. The question becomes: where are they on defense?
Speaker 7
And, you know, getting Derwin James back will be big for that because he can erase tight ends. And at the vision, you got to erase some tight ends.
So,
Speaker 7
yeah, I think they're going to push for a playoff spot. I don't think they're winning the division.
And I like Washington in week one, by the way.
Speaker 1
Yeah, I did. That's actually my mortal lock.
I saw that, Barcelon Sports Box.
Speaker 1 That is your mortal lot. That's your mortality.
Speaker 1 I'm also like,
Speaker 1 I'm kind of like laying a mattress down for my own brain on this one because I've already thought ahead to what I'm going to feel like the Monday after the Washington football team loses against the Chargers at home.
Speaker 1 And so right now I'm just like, you know what? I think that they're the best team in the AFC. I think they're a sneaky, good team.
Speaker 1 So maybe I'm just over-inflating them, getting my, like, protecting my own ego in advance when I get disappointed.
Speaker 7 You know, it's amazing, but you're right about the Chargers, though. Something always happens.
Speaker 1
Yeah, yeah. They're sneaking.
It always happens. Yeah.
Them and the Falcons. They had the year where they didn't make the playoffs, where they were the number one offense and number one defense.
Speaker 1 It's like, how is that possible?
Speaker 7 Well, even like going back to when they had the Falcs days,
Speaker 7 they went on the road and beat Miami in an overtime game. Then they had to go play Cincinnati in the freezing cold and they couldn't throw the football, which is what they did.
Speaker 7 Something always happens to the Chargers. There's always some bad luck involved.
Speaker 1 Let me ask you, though, with the Chargers and your knowledge of how long you've been covering the NFL?
Speaker 7 33 years.
Speaker 1 Do you have a Hall of Fame vote?
Speaker 7 I don't.
Speaker 1 So are we getting you a Hall of Fame vote or are we getting you into the Hall of Fame? We couldn't remember. Will Brinson asked us to do that?
Speaker 7 Will Brinson wants to get me into the Hall of Fame?
Speaker 1
Okay, so bypass the vote and get you into the Hall of Fame. Yeah.
Skip, do not pass, go.
Speaker 1 Do not collect your $200. I used to want to have the vote.
Speaker 7 You know the story of the vote, right?
Speaker 1 No, tell me.
Speaker 7 The vote used to go to the beat writer for the local market. And when they were giving it out in Jacksonville, it should have gone to the newspaper and I was the beat guy then.
Speaker 7
But I angered the organization so much, including Tom McCoughlin, that they decided to give it to a TV guy instead. And once you get it, you keep it.
Wow. So
Speaker 7 the newspaper in Jacksonville has never had the Hall of Fame vote.
Speaker 1 We need to right or wrong. So Pete Prisco basically caused that.
Speaker 1 That's why you're 90% Italian. Your hot temper got you
Speaker 1 banned from the NFL Hall of Fame votes. At the very least, you know what we'll do for you, Pete? At the very, very minimum, we're going to get you one better than a Hall of Fame vote.
Speaker 1 We'll get you an NVP vote.
Speaker 1 How do you like that? Do I have one of those? No, you do?
Speaker 1
No, NVP. MVP.
N.
Speaker 1 Oh,
Speaker 1 Nickelodeon, valuable player. And
Speaker 1 MVP.
Speaker 1
Let's throw a low-man trophy vote in there. Sure.
All right, you got one of those too now. What's that? It's for the greatest fullback in college football every year.
Oh, I like that. Okay.
Speaker 7 You know what I say about fullbacks? When you hand the ball to him, it's donated down.
Speaker 1
Yeah, I know. I've heard that joke before, Pete.
Yeah, it's good. You don't like that? No, I'm not donated down.
I don't.
Speaker 1
I think that if you give a fullback a ball, you ask him to get two yards, he'll get you three. If you ask him to get you five yards, he'll get you three.
That's consistency.
Speaker 7
Yeah, that's the magic man. That's the Toby.
That's why I used to call Toby Gerhart, the magic man. Yeah.
He turned a 20-yard run into a three-yard run, and a three-yard run into a three-yard run.
Speaker 1 All right. So,
Speaker 1
oh, I had a question about the Chargers. So they did switch, obviously, coaching staffs.
We are believers in Brandon Staley. We had him on.
He was fantastic. We'll have him on again.
Speaker 1 My question, though, is it's rare that you have a quarterback like Justin Herbert who was so good his rookie year and then have the entire coaching staff change.
Speaker 1 Is there, like from your covering of the league, from your understanding of how this works,
Speaker 1 are you worried at all about that change, even though it could be a change for the positive? But are you worried about having him, you know, he's got to learn new stuff?
Speaker 1 He's got to learn, you know, to work with another signal caller, like all these things. Does that worry you at all?
Speaker 7
No. Okay.
You either have it or you don't.
Speaker 1
Okay. There it is.
I like that.
Speaker 7 I'm a big believer in that. Either have it or you don't.
Speaker 7 It's like, it's like everybody always says, well, Aaron Rodgers got the watch for a couple of years before he played, and it really helped make him a better quarterback.
Speaker 1 No, it didn't.
Speaker 7 You either have it or you don't.
Speaker 1
Okay, so I totally agree with you. Mark Schlerith actually changed our mind about that a few years ago.
He said that exact same thing. He's like, if he's the guy, he's the guy.
Speaker 1 It doesn't really matter. I used to believe that if you get beat up your rookie year, you start looking at the pass rush.
Speaker 1 It's like, no, if you start looking at the pass rush, you were just never going to be that guy anyway. So
Speaker 1 my question then is, my Bears, Justin Fields, like, do you think it's egregious that he is not starting?
Speaker 7 Yes.
Speaker 1 Okay, thank you. Thank you.
Speaker 7 I would start.
Speaker 7
You got to get on with it. Right.
You have to find out. The sooner you find out if that guy's the guy, and if he isn't, the quicker you get to the next guy.
Speaker 1 And not only that, I know that a lot of the counter-argument is if Justin Fields is a franchise guy and he has, you know, let's say 15-year career in the NFL, Andy Dalton starting the first three games is not going to matter in the long term, which is correct, but
Speaker 1 I think it does how the NFL is set up now. I think that window where you have a guy who could be special on a rookie pay grade matters a lot for building a team.
Speaker 1 You have a finite window where you can win with a roster around him and not have to pay him a ton of money. So that's why you start him right away.
Speaker 7 Look, every quarterback I've ever talked to said, I learned more playing a half of a regular season game than I did watching an entire year if they watched it. And it's just this.
Speaker 7 So, yes, play those.
Speaker 7
I always say it, play the kid. Now, in San Francisco, I'm a little different because I think that team's ready to win.
and win big this year.
Speaker 7 So play Jimmy Garoppolo right away because I don't think Trey Lance is ready from throwing the football standpoint yet. It's going to take him a little time.
Speaker 1
And he's also a different case in that he played one game last year. He played at a different level of college football.
So it does change things a little bit.
Speaker 7
Yeah, you're right. The Bears aren't supposed to be good.
So go to home with New Fields and play them.
Speaker 1 I actually am very, very down on them. I think they're going to be very, very bad.
Speaker 7 They're going to cover Monday night, though.
Speaker 1 I don't know how they score 13 points.
Speaker 7 They're going to cover Monday night.
Speaker 1
Okay. All right.
I like that confidence. What do you think about about what's going on in New Orleans this year? Jameis Winston.
Are you a believer? Are you a hater?
Speaker 7 No, I like Jameis Winston.
Speaker 1 There we go.
Speaker 7 I just think one of Jameis Winston's things is he's got to cut down on his interceptions, period.
Speaker 1 He can't be.
Speaker 1
And I've had. That's why we have him on.
He watches the tape, guys.
Speaker 1 Nothing gets by you.
Speaker 7 Every single coaches have told me they tell him, look, Jameis, you can't be a hero on every play.
Speaker 7
Check down is okay. You can't be a hero on every play.
And it still hasn't gone through. Well, Sean Payton said, my quarterbacks, he told me my quarterbacks don't throw interceptions.
Speaker 7 So there's a dynamic there to see who wins out. Is it Sean Payton cuts down interceptions or is Jameis still going to be the hero?
Speaker 1 So something's got to give. Yeah, so what's the offense going to look like without Drew Brees? Because we've only seen Sean Payton and Drew Brees.
Speaker 1 They've been married for the last, what, like 15 years down there?
Speaker 1 It'll be interesting. What's the offense going to look like in terms of how are they going to use Kamara? How are they going to use Jameis?
Speaker 1 What's going to be different about the offense this year when you compare it to what it's been like?
Speaker 7 Well, last year, Drew Brees wasn't that good either.
Speaker 1 No, he's terrible.
Speaker 7
Yeah, so they're going to be able to drive the ball. You're going to see more shots down the field.
I think Calloway is going to hit some big shots down the field in the passing game.
Speaker 7 You're going to use the tight ends a lot. If you go back and look at his history, when he didn't have wide receivers, he used the tight ends in the running backs.
Speaker 7
So Kamara is going to have a monster year. I think they should give him more carries.
I don't think they give him enough carries.
Speaker 7 And that's one of the things that Sean Payton's always said is like, we want to keep him fresh in December.
Speaker 7 But this team, you might need need to give them more carries early because they might not be around come December. You know what I mean? They might not be playing meaningful games.
Speaker 1 All right. So I like this.
Speaker 1 This is why we have Pete on because we didn't actually plan anything because you are a recurring guest and we consider you a friend, but we are kind of jumping around and hitting almost everything I want to hit.
Speaker 1
Let's jump to Seattle. You are a famous, known Russell Wilson hater.
Now, wrong. Yes, right.
Speaker 1
Now, you're the guy who, like, if Russell Wilson makes an incredible play, Pete then goes, he left a clean pocket and gets like really upset about it. That is correct.
Am I not wrong?
Speaker 7
I've done that. Yep, many times.
I do that with all quarterbacks.
Speaker 1
Now, I liked Russell Wilson. Obviously, when he played at Wisconsin, I think he's an awesome player.
I love watching him play when he gets going.
Speaker 1
But I think it's fair, and even Seattle fans would agree on this. He has faded the last couple of seasons down the stretch.
And there has been some weird moments.
Speaker 1 And that loss against the Rams this year in the playoffs, he was very, very bad. So
Speaker 1 what's the issue? And what's the fix for Seattle and Russell Wilson?
Speaker 7 Okay, first off,
Speaker 7 I wasn't a hater.
Speaker 1 I was a critic.
Speaker 7 And the reason I was a critic was because they won with, they had the top scoring defense in the league four straight years, four.
Speaker 7
The only other team that did that was the 50s Browns, which was a dynasty. That's why they won those Super Bowls.
And they ran the ball.
Speaker 7 Now, as they've morphed into a team that doesn't have a great defense, he's actually become a significantly better quarterback in my eyes. I think he's better.
Speaker 7 And I think part of the problem is style. You have Lockett and Metcalf outside, and you have a quarterback who plays better, free, loose and free, thrown on early downs.
Speaker 7 And what does Pete Carroll want to do? He wants to run the ball. And I think that's where the problem is with Russell Wilson.
Speaker 7 I think Russell Wilson, to the point, if he plays up tempo, loose and free, he's a much better quarterback.
Speaker 7 They don't want to let him do that because they still think they're a defensive team that can run the ball. And that's the problem right there.
Speaker 1
Okay. All right.
So your problem is that you love Russell Wilson too much now. Yeah.
You are so right about him.
Speaker 7 He's come around in a big way.
Speaker 1 Yeah, because he listened to you.
Speaker 7 You know it. You know, if these guys all listened to me, they'd be better players.
Speaker 1 Why don't you give him an MVP vote, though? Because you could actually have the, like, last year, you should have given him an MVP vote.
Speaker 1 So that way, the story on Sunday Night Football, when Chris Collinsworth is like, you know, he's never had an MVP vote they could be like you know they've he's only had one MVP vote it was Pete Prisco no I got I would after eight games he probably was the MVP last but you're gonna say you have integrity like that's a great you could get a lot of shine from that yeah I won't do that no this year I might though give me some ideas halfway through the season I might change it for you okay Mitch Trubisky
Speaker 7 Best backup in the league.
Speaker 1
Oh, okay. Best.
The best.
Speaker 1 He looked good. Like, not only just from like.
Speaker 1 And I'm not not just talking about the scheme that they had him in, which was a lot different, obviously, on the Bills under Dable, but like, he looked like a good quarterback mechanically.
Speaker 7 Yeah, but you know, there's some guys that when they're playing with as the starter, the pressure is too much for them. And then when they play as the backup, there's no pressure and he plays better.
Speaker 1 But so my big like issue with Ryan Pace, the GM, is I know that Mitch Trubisky had to, they had to move on from him, right? Because Matt Nagy clearly didn't trust him.
Speaker 1
We watched it in that in that playoff game. Andy Dalton's not better than Mitch Trubisky as we currently see.
Yes, he is. No, he's not.
Right this second.
Speaker 1
Right this second, you think Andy Dalton's a better starter than Mitch Trubisky? I disagree. No.
Watch the tape. I do.
Speaker 7
Watch the tape. Because he is.
He's a better. He's a better player.
Speaker 1 So you think Andy Dalton is still a competent starter in the NFL? Nice guy.
Speaker 1
Nice. He's a serviceable starter.
Serviceable is not competent.
Speaker 7 Yeah,
Speaker 7 he's competent for a couple games. I don't think you can win consistently with him over the long haul.
Speaker 1 He's serviceable for 10. He's competent for two.
Speaker 7 Yeah, I mean, he's better than Mitch Chubiski.
Speaker 1
I disagree. Pete, I got a question about comeback player of the year.
Do you get a vote on that, too?
Speaker 7 I don't know if we vote. I think we do, yeah.
Speaker 1 What do you have to come back from? Can you just like, can you come back from laser eye surgery? Can you come back from, like, obviously in ACL? That would be a comeback.
Speaker 1 Can you come back from just sucking last year?
Speaker 1 What are the rules?
Speaker 7 There are no rules, I don't think, but you got to be able to come back. I think it's coming, mostly It's coming back from an.
Speaker 7 I mean, Eric Berry came back from an illness a couple of years ago and won.
Speaker 1 Yep.
Speaker 7 I mean, you're like going into the, you're going into the deep, dark places. Like, if somebody had a car wreck and they came back, yeah, they'd probably win the award.
Speaker 1 So, like, Ben Rothesberger, for example, I bet you he's really pissed off that he didn't win last year when Alex Jones won it because this was like Ben Smith. Or sorry,
Speaker 1
Alex Jones. Alex Jones.
No.
Speaker 1
He did not win Comeback Player of the Year. Not yet.
But no, when Alex Smith, you know, obviously had the gruesome leg injury.
Speaker 1
Ben Rothesberger was probably like, this is my year that I'll come back because I had the elbow surgery that no doctor had ever seen before. But he didn't play well enough.
So that's what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 Could he win this year? From coming back from not winning the comeback player of the year? Yes. No.
Speaker 7 Dak Prescott's going to win it this year. That's almost a lock.
Speaker 1
So, okay. Well, that dubs tails nicely into what I was going to ask you with Dak.
Let's just say, hypothetically, the Dallas Cowboys offense stays 100% healthy this year. Okay.
Okay.
Speaker 1 So all their guys play an entire season.
Speaker 1 are they going to win the nfc beast or is it going to be somebody else washington's winning it even if dallas's offense stays totally healthy yeah because they have still have defensive problems what's i think that yeah what what's their deal on defense why do they have like nine linebackers
Speaker 1 well i mean they have yeah well they paid jalen smith so they have to keep them they drafted micah parsons they have van der ash like they yeah i don't know they got kian o'nils playing linebacker who's actually playing can you explain that it might be parsons and kian o'neal on the field more than the other two guys.
Speaker 1 Right. Can you explain why they are going into this season with what feels like way too many linebackers?
Speaker 7
I don't understand it. I just, I mean, well, they weren't happy with Jalen Smith and Vander Ash got hurt last year, remember? So that's why they drafted Parsons.
I wouldn't have drafted Parsons.
Speaker 7
And he's been very good, but I would have drafted another position, corner, something like that, because I think they need a pass rusher. I think you're right.
They have too many linebackers.
Speaker 7 But Jalen Smith, they made the mistake of paying him, and then he didn't play that well, man.
Speaker 1 Yeah. Daniel Jones, since we're in the NFC Beast, Daniel Jones, buying or selling?
Speaker 7 I think the situation is going to make me a seller.
Speaker 7
Unless his line can somehow get better, he's going to take a lot of shots. Yeah.
I mean, you know, they've been bad on the front, up front. They have to be better up front.
Speaker 1 Do you think Joe Judge, like, he feels...
Speaker 1 Kind of like one of those coaches that if things go bad this year, everyone's going to be like, fuck this guy, because he makes us run laps and we're professionals.
Speaker 7 Yeah, there's a there's a fine line there. That when if you push too hard and you're not winning, it's going to go left.
Speaker 1 Are you worried about? Are you worried about Urban in that respect? Because he definitely feels like a guy who's going to keep doing his method, even if they're not good.
Speaker 7 Yes, I worry about Urban in a lot of ways because
Speaker 7
how's he handled losing? Because he's going to lose. He's never lost before.
Right.
Speaker 7 I mean, you think about it.
Speaker 7 I heard he was upset after the preseason loss.
Speaker 1 Oh, God.
Speaker 1 I love it. How much Papa Johns did he?
Speaker 1 He probably was like, fuck, we're going to drop to 10th in the rankings.
Speaker 7
So you can't, you can't. The NFL, you lose a game.
You got to get over that quickly because you're playing. You know, in college, you lost the game, your season's over.
Speaker 7
But in the NFL, you lose a game. You're not done.
You got to keep playing. There's a ton of football left to play.
And I think that's the mentality he's going to have to get at us.
Speaker 1 What about other first-year coaches? Which one do you think is going to be the best? Which one do you think is going to be the worst?
Speaker 7 You know, I think Dan Campbell's actually going to be a good coach. It's not going to happen this year.
Speaker 7 I think
Speaker 7 he's going to be one of those guys that the players play for, respect, and believe in. I really think he's going to be a heck of a coach.
Speaker 7 You know, the rest of those guys, I'm trying to think off the top of my head who I was.
Speaker 1 Sirianni. Sirianni is who I'm kind of dancing around.
Speaker 7 You know what?
Speaker 7 Everybody killed him because of his press conference and all that. And I don't know Nick, but people I do know that know him very well say he's a grinder and he's a good coach.
Speaker 1
Coach. And so we'll say.
Coach Siri.
Speaker 7 But Universal Express Conference was terrible. It was like he was like, you know, an interrogation or something.
Speaker 1
It's awful. Yeah.
What about, so who's the first coach fired this year? Never talk about another man's job. They have families.
Families,
Speaker 1 yeah, the private school to another private school.
Speaker 7 Once you're making $7 million a year to coach or $5 million a year to coach a football team,
Speaker 1
it's open season. That would be the joke, Pete.
Thank you. I know.
I get it. I don't think you do.
No, I get it
Speaker 1 i think that's the pervert coming out i don't think you do we got three kids at georgetown okay tuition's got to come for a guy with that mustache calling people perverts is pretty interesting hey
Speaker 1 i know one right you gotta be one to know one who's the first coach to get fired um
Speaker 1 oh wow That's a good question. I mean, how about we just say some names? Yeah, like
Speaker 1 well, it's got to be someone who's obviously not on their rookie deal.
Speaker 1 Correct. So it can't be, you know, it can't be
Speaker 7
bad or Lions are bad. They're not getting fired.
The Jets are bad. They're not getting fired.
The Jaguars are bad. They're not getting fired.
So there's.
Speaker 1 Yeah, Joe Judge, I think, is safe in year two to not get fired during the season. They just don't, they don't like to fire people at the Giants.
Speaker 7 What about the Bengals?
Speaker 1 Zach Taylor. I don't think that they care about Zach Taylor.
Speaker 7 I think he's okay. No, I think he's okay for this year.
Speaker 1 Ooh, let me throw one out there for you. What about Cliff Kingsbury?
Speaker 7 Hot seat.
Speaker 1 Yeah, like if the Cardinals stumble out of the gate here, I feel like that could happen.
Speaker 7 He's got to win this year for sure.
Speaker 1 Yes.
Speaker 7 If they're talented and if they're, you know,
Speaker 7 four and seven at one point, he could be in big trouble.
Speaker 1 What about Vic Fangio?
Speaker 7 Another one
Speaker 7 if he's struggling, he's in trouble.
Speaker 7 Particularly since that quarterback was his pick, by the way.
Speaker 1 Yeah, but let me ask you this about Vic Fangio because he's obviously, I would make the argument that he's the best defensive coordinator in the NFL right now.
Speaker 1
If If he was a defensive coordinator, not a head coach, what he did, what he's done everywhere. He did it in San Francisco.
He did it for Stanford. He did it for the Bears.
Speaker 1 Like, he's been everywhere, done it. What is the,
Speaker 1 why does a guy who is that good at his job as defensive coordinator struggle as a head coach?
Speaker 7
Because it's the gate, it's manage the people. You got to coach your coaches and manage the players.
And it's different.
Speaker 7 When you have a room full of, you know, half the team, it's different than having the entire team. And when you have all the coaches, it's different than having your staff on the defense.
Speaker 7 It's just a, it becomes a bigger job and you got to deal with all the distractions.
Speaker 7 And this guy's, you know, didn't come to practice on time because he had to go pick up his wife or, you know, all the crap you have to deal with.
Speaker 7 And so that's where I think some guys handle it better and other guys don't.
Speaker 7
And you've seen it. Guys are just coaches and they can't handle all this stuff on the outside.
You know, and whether Vic's that guy or not, we'll know after this year.
Speaker 7 But he picked, I'm a big believer that he picked Teddy Bridgewater over Drew Locks because he thinks his defense is going to be that dominant and he just wants him to play it safe rather than take the shots down the field.
Speaker 1 Which, if his defense is, if you know, when his defense is rolling, that is how they can win. Like, they are, he has been part of some really, really good defenses.
Speaker 7 So, I, I, that defense is going to be really good, by the way.
Speaker 1 So, there you go.
Speaker 7 I'm bullish on the Broncos' defense.
Speaker 1 So, they can win games with 17 points. If Vic Fangio's got his defense rolling, they can win games like that.
Speaker 7 Yeah, but okay, I get it. But
Speaker 7 your floor is probably a little bit higher, but your ceiling's not as high.
Speaker 7 I think if they had picked Locke, they had a chance to be, you know, if he's what he can flash at times, then you have a chance to be a much better team and maybe go deeper to the postseason.
Speaker 7 You might make the postseason this year, but can you win consistently with that?
Speaker 1 The counter-argument would be if you put Locke in there and your defense is as good as you think it is, you're going to lose games that you should absolutely win with Drew Locke making mistakes.
Speaker 7 But again, if your defense is that good, you make a mistake, then you're going to stop him and hold them to a field goal.
Speaker 1 Yeah, but no, but if your defense is like out of this world good, right, and you lose the game because Drew Locke threw three interceptions, that kills you because you're like, our defense put together a game that should absolutely win, and we just weren't able to do it.
Speaker 7 Well, the other side of that is if your defense is that great and you play conservative offensive football and you end up with seven points and you lose 10-7, it's the that's the other side.
Speaker 1 Don't make me break out the expected points per drive chart, Pete.
Speaker 1 Because, like, we're talking if you if you throw turnovers in your like inside your own 30, that's probably going to translate to more points than if you drive to the 30, then punt.
Speaker 7 Well, since every defense is exactly the same in the NFL.
Speaker 1 You're being sarcastic. Whoa, what was that? Were you just being sarcastic?
Speaker 7 It's just like, because we only get these analytics guys now, they come out and they say, all right, you know, this and this and this. And I, you know, Tony Khan, who
Speaker 7 owns an analytics company, is, you know, the son of the owner in Jacksonville.
Speaker 7 And I said to him, I said, when you guys start doing analytics based on inches instead of yards, then come because when the ball's over the two-yard line, and okay, let's just say you're inside the two, but you're not at the one.
Speaker 7 What's it say on the stat sheet?
Speaker 1 Don't hand the ball to Marshawn Lynch.
Speaker 1 Well,
Speaker 7 that's what it says in history, but what's it say? Seriously, it says
Speaker 7 fourth and one, right?
Speaker 1 Right.
Speaker 7 So if you're inside the one on the inch line, what's it say on the stat sheet?
Speaker 1 Fourth and one.
Speaker 7 It's not the same thing.
Speaker 1
Yeah, you're right. It's a game of inches.
Good point. They're all around us.
Speaker 1 Right. Yeah.
Speaker 7 So that you can't not that, and plus game flow matters in stats, and they don't take that into account. Game flow.
Speaker 7 If you're in a 45-41 game, it's and you're on fourth and three, it's easier to go for it than if it's 10-7.
Speaker 1 Okay, I agree with that.
Speaker 1 But something that I think is also very underrated when you're talking about like analytics and people trying to take the human element out of a game is complimentary football, which then goes back to what we're talking about with the Broncos.
Speaker 1 I think that if you have a great defense, complimentary football-wise, you don't want an offense that's going to turn the ball over because then it starts to take away from the defense and they lose some of their juice.
Speaker 1 Whereas if you have an offense that can maybe hold the ball for a while, manufacture points, maybe not be electric, I think that's complimentary football.
Speaker 7 That's playing scare.
Speaker 1 Okay. That's playing scare.
Speaker 1 I don't like your Teddy Bridgewater hate.
Speaker 7 No, I like Teddy.
Speaker 1
Nah, you don't. It doesn't sound like you do.
You don't. It sounds like you're just like.
Speaker 7 I just think Locke has a chance to drive the ball down the field more than also throw a lot of picks.
Speaker 7 What was he? Seven touchdowns and two picks down the stretch last year. I mean, that's okay.
Speaker 1 I think it was something. Garbage time?
Speaker 7 Well, no,
Speaker 7 he actually played much better down the stretch. And he looked good in the preseason.
Speaker 1 He looked really good in the preseason. Drew Locke looked really good in the preseason.
Speaker 7
Look at it. Big cat.
What were they? It was like seven and two.
Speaker 1
I'm looking it up. I'm looking it up.
I'm looking it up. I like Teddy Bridgewater because you can always count him to cover the spread against when he's an underdog.
Speaker 1
I think he covers, what, like 60% of the time? Yeah. 68% of the time, something like that.
Drew locked down the stretch. So last year he threw 15 touchdowns, 16 interceptions.
You're wrong, Pete.
Speaker 1 He went,
Speaker 1 he had a clean game, two touchdowns, zero interception against the
Speaker 1 Raiders in week 16. But in week 15, he threw two picks.
Speaker 1 Okay. Zero touchdowns.
Speaker 7 Wasn't there a three touchdown game against him?
Speaker 1 He had a four touchdown game against Carolina. But I mean,
Speaker 1 okay.
Speaker 7 So what was the final four games? What were the numbers?
Speaker 1 The final four games, well, if you want to go final five games, he was 2-4, 7, 9, 9, and 4.
Speaker 7 See, that's not bad.
Speaker 1 It's not bad, but again, you look at the games. They lost a three-point game to the Chargers where he threw two picks and no touchdowns.
Speaker 1 They lost the six-point game to the Chiefs where he threw two picks. So you lost two games because of, like i guess we're just saying the same thing i mean he can win
Speaker 1 i like
Speaker 7 a little bit too because when i met him at the uh senior bowl one year i said hey uh i said you know they're gonna ping you on your small hands you know yeah he goes yeah yeah yeah this is on camera he goes yeah yeah yeah and then he walked away and he turned back and he goes dan marino had small hands too you know oh so that's how all right so now you've i i like that because i think that you um you know you get one piece of information and you carry it with you forever i like no i just like i like a guy who has an attitude yeah he's got Moxie.
Speaker 1
He's the Moxie. He is the Moxiest.
Yeah. I just looked it up, Teddy Bridgewater, 35, 13, and 1 against the spread.
Speaker 7 As an underdog. That's impressive.
Speaker 1
Yeah. No, that's as a starter.
Oh, as a starter. That's as a starter.
I love it. I love it.
That's impressive. Pretty good.
I have one last question for you, Pete. This has been great.
Speaker 1
Tell me how it goes wrong for the Packers. I don't want to hear how it goes right.
I want to hear how it goes wrong.
Speaker 7 The defense doesn't get any better.
Speaker 1
Okay. I like that.
And do you think that will happen?
Speaker 7
No. Damn.
They're going to be good again.
Speaker 1 We'll cut that part.
Speaker 7 Do you hate that? You hate the Packers.
Speaker 1
I hate the Packers. They're going to dominate.
The NFC North is actually
Speaker 1 the most.
Speaker 1 I'm trying to think. I'm going through all the divisions.
Speaker 7 No, the Vikings will be better than you think they are.
Speaker 1 You think so? But
Speaker 1 I think the Packers are
Speaker 1 the most shocking result that could happen in the regular season in the NFL is the Packers not winning the North.
Speaker 1 Yes, I would agree with that. Yes.
Speaker 7 Because they'll win the North, but the Vikings are going to be better than you think they are, though.
Speaker 1 I don't think so.
Speaker 1
I do. I think Kirk Cousins.
I think offensively,
Speaker 7 they're going to be much better than they were a year ago.
Speaker 1 Don't you get the vibes from Mike Zimmer that
Speaker 1
he's kind of sick of his team? They all are sick of Kirk Cousins. And not just Kirk Cousins.
I feel like Mike Zimmer's just...
Speaker 1 He's walking into work and just being like, I don't want to be here anymore.
Speaker 1 No, he's
Speaker 1 not guy.
Speaker 7
He's excited about the defense, man. I'm telling you.
Justin Jefferson is going to be the best receiver in the league by the end of the year.
Speaker 1
Kellen Mond, I think, will start a game by the end of the year. No.
Yep. All right.
We'll bet. We'll bet.
We'll bet a stake on it. Okay.
All right. No, no, okay.
Speaker 7 Barring injury, though.
Speaker 1
No. No, yeah.
You can't get it. No, I get injury.
No. Yes, I get injury.
What the fuck is that?
Speaker 7 Is Kellen Mond going to start a game because he's taking over for performance reasons?
Speaker 1
No, I get both. I get if Kirk Cousins gets hurt.
Yeah, no, no, no, no.
Speaker 1
He gets hurt all the time. Kirk Cousins' ankle isn't.
I get both. It isn't performing anymore.
I get both.
Speaker 7 Okay, Okay, what if he went out for COVID?
Speaker 1 Well, that's his fault.
Speaker 7
Okay. Yeah.
But I'm not giving you that one either. So, no, Kellen Mond plays.
Speaker 7 If Kellen Mond plays because Kirk Cousins isn't playing well enough, you win the bet. If Kellen Mond doesn't play because if he plays because of injury or something, then you don't win the bet.
Speaker 1
Kirk Cousins has started 16, 16, 16, 16, 15, and 16 games. Come on.
Make the bet with the injury clause.
Speaker 7 No.
Speaker 1 Don't be afraid. Don't do do this.
Speaker 7 You were saying it for performance reasons.
Speaker 1
No, I was just saying it. I was just saying.
All right, fine. I'll fucking make the bet.
I don't care. I think Kirk Cousins is.
Speaker 7 Do you think Kellen Mond plays for performance reasons?
Speaker 1 Yes. I'll just say yes.
Speaker 7 There you go. All right.
Speaker 1
Then let's bet on that. Steak.
Stake and Indy. Billy had one last question for you.
Hi, Pete.
Speaker 1 Quick question. Using your Trevor Lawrence
Speaker 1 thinking on playing from behind, do you think that Zach Wilson has a chance of being rookie of the year with the Jets?
Speaker 7
Yes. particularly with their young corners.
I do. Yes.
They're going to play from behind as well.
Speaker 1
Okay. Okay.
I like it.
Speaker 1 What did you think about Philly deciding to start BOFA?
Speaker 1 What?
Speaker 1 What did you think about Philly deciding to start BOFA?
Speaker 7 Bofa.
Speaker 1 Yeah, Bofa D's nuts.
Speaker 1 God, you guys are so good. Do you get to have two? Do you get to? Do you still have to?
Speaker 1 You know, you get a little older. Sometimes you take one.
Speaker 1
Yeah. not your ass.
Fun, fun, Pete. Not your ass.
Love it, Pete.
Speaker 1
You got me. Yeah.
You got me. Yeah, we got you.
Speaker 1 So you hide a candidas for me, okay?
Speaker 7 You're not getting me on that one either. How about Mike?
Speaker 7 No, I'm not even going to say that.
Speaker 1 Mike Hunt? Yeah, you know him? Yeah, I know Mike Hunt.
Speaker 1
All right, Pete. Thank you.
It's always fun. Go check him out at CBS Sports, one of our favorite advanced.
Speaker 7 Oh, how's Simon's kid doing over here, huh? Is he still your producer?
Speaker 1
Simon. Oh, Jake.
Jake Marsh. Oh, Oh, yeah.
Yes. Yeah.
We forgot about him.
Speaker 1 Yeah, we met him.
Speaker 1
We met him. Yeah.
He seems like the kind of guy that would get along real well with you. Yeah.
Speaker 1 Just two South Florida guys.
Speaker 7
Yeah, of course. They're Jets fans, though.
I grew up a Giants fan.
Speaker 1
Yeah, yeah. I love it.
All right. All right.
Pete, are you... Wait, is it,
Speaker 1 would you rather have Ed Sheeran or Imagine Dragons playing the opening night?
Speaker 7 Imagine Dragons.
Speaker 1 Imagine dragging these nuts on your forehead.
Speaker 1 Ah!
Speaker 1 Walked into it again.
Speaker 7 You're probably hanging by your ankles, by the way.
Speaker 1
Ah, got your ass. All right, Pete.
See ya. See you, Pete.
See you guys. Thank you, Pete.
Speaker 8 Hey, this is Rhea from Chicks in the Office, and this season, we're heading home for the holidays with Abercrombie and Fitch. We all know our calendars are about to get chaotic.
Speaker 8 For non-stop plans, Abercrombie has the pieces to curate your perfect seasonal wardrobe, sweaters and denim for casual plans, party dresses for nights out, and comfy matching sets for everything in between.
Speaker 8 Keep the chaos cute this season in Abercrombie. Shop their new holiday outfits in the app online or in stores.
Speaker 1 All right. Fire Fest of the Week to wrap it up.
Speaker 1
Remember, no guests on Mondays in the football season, so we can just talk football. We can talk ball.
We'll be taping after everything, so get excited.
Speaker 1 Fire Fest of the Week, Hank.
Speaker 1 My Fire Fest. I was trying to remember this, Big Cat.
Speaker 1 I i couldn't tell if you were the one that put me on to the fan app yeah okay you were so i need white noise to sleep my uh ac in my old apartment used to like blast and it was enough noise and everything cold came in didn't need a fan uh i bought a fan for my new apartment because the ac doesn't it comes through but you don't hear it i need to hear it i can't just sleep with my own thoughts otherwise i don't sleep yeah torture uh
Speaker 1 so i bought a fan broke the fan I don't know how. I literally don't know how.
Speaker 1 All of a sudden it just like came unhinged, was still going and like just It was like a hose basically like the head of the fan came off and was just going crazy around my apartment. What?
Speaker 1 And then I tried it shattered in the middle of the night? It didn't shatter. It just like fell off and then was still imagine a hose.
Speaker 1 Like imagine a hose when you drop it and it's got a motor so it's moving around your apartment. So it was still plugged in and it was still just like
Speaker 1 the whole night with this?
Speaker 1 Yeah and I had to like I was like oh and I had to turn it off and then I'm just trying to think like the different steps that my brain was trying to figure out what was happening also when I've got a fan tap dancing around my bedroom.
Speaker 1
Also, add to the fact that we're not talking about a regular person getting woken up. We're talking about Hank, who he probably wanted to fistfight the fan.
Are you sure?
Speaker 1 So that's the fire best.
Speaker 1 I'm pretty sure in my, what you just described, I think I broke the fan trying to like mash it back together because then the next day I was like, all right, I'm going to fix this fan. It's broken.
Speaker 1 Like, it's just completely broken.
Speaker 1 Hank could win the heavyweight championship of the world if you just got him to go in the ring right after he woke up. Yeah.
Speaker 1
You just like had him sleep next to the ring, just tapped him on the shoulder, and just like, all right, fight time. He'd go in and just smash anyone.
Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 1 I mean, you guys, like, my, I remember my sister, which used to have to wake me up for school, and like, that was like, we had, you know, years of
Speaker 1 turmoil because of it, because I would just flip out on it.
Speaker 1 But yeah, so then I just, I, but I did have the fan app. I actually paid for the upgraded one because
Speaker 1 I added a little music. No ads, a little music.
Speaker 1
But I have to get another fan. I just bought this one like two weeks ago.
It sucks. Good news is summer's over.
Speaker 1 But
Speaker 1 it's not even about.
Speaker 1
And it's nice to not have to use your phone for it. Right.
Yeah, because
Speaker 1 I did that. And the first night, I was like,
Speaker 1
once I went back, realized the fan was broken, turned on the fan app, and then woke up. My phone was dead.
Right. Right.
Why don't you
Speaker 1
try to just go on a YouTube channel? I bet you if you just search like fan noise on YouTube, you could just... But the fan app has it all.
Right. The fan app has it all.
Speaker 1 I also like the
Speaker 1 cool air. Yeah.
Speaker 1 And
Speaker 1
you're like the real fan. Yeah.
Yeah, preferably. Or the fan app.
Speaker 1
If the AC does enough, like the AC is on in my room, but it's not that cold and it's not, the noise isn't coming through. The fan app is for the road.
An actual old-school fan is for at home. Right.
Speaker 1 Yep. Okay.
Speaker 1 I really wish that you had had like some sort of surveillance video of your room. I would love to see it.
Speaker 1 I know you would like that.
Speaker 1 Maybe some mirrors on the ceiling too, right? PFT?
Speaker 1
It would have been an all-time hilarious baseball injury. Like that's a middle reliever.
Hurt my fingers or something. Fights his fan in the middle of the night.
Like, wait, he fought a fan?
Speaker 1
No, no, no. He fought his fan.
His fan. He was trying to catch his fan.
Yeah. Because it was on the loose.
He had a rogue fan.
Speaker 1 All right.
Speaker 1
Yours, PFT. I've been thinking about time.
I've been thinking about time too much. Whoa.
Oh, boy. It's fucking me up.
Stop. You know what I thought about today? Yeah, we're almost 40.
Speaker 1 Going back in time for seven years. Dude, stop.
Speaker 1 I know you don't like age.
Speaker 1
That's a million times worse than the 40. When I'm 37 this January, shut up.
And that's basically 40?
Speaker 1
Yeah, I know. I think about it all the time.
I'm okay with that. My battery.
I've embraced it. You're a man.
I am. I've embraced it.
I'm a man. I'm a man.
You're still 28. You got time.
Speaker 1
But I've been thinking about time. It fucks me up.
Even the 40 thing is bad, obviously. But thinking, I did one of those, like, oh, this date is closer to that date than this date is right now.
Speaker 1
So the NFL started in 1920, right? That's when week one of the first NFL season was. That's closer to the life of Thomas Jefferson than it is to today.
Whoa. Damn.
It fucked me up. That is fucked up.
Speaker 1 I had one, and you probably had the same one where it's
Speaker 1 this fall.
Speaker 1
The I still have friends that I met freshman year in college. This fall is officially I've known them for more than half my life.
Yeah, I've had that. It's nuts.
Speaker 1 I was talking to Big Hat about this the other week, but
Speaker 1 we, me, and Big Hat have been, because we started the same, similar, like the same year at Barcelona.
Speaker 1
We've been doing part of my take for more years than we've worked at Barstall before that, which is crazy. Yeah.
Because when we started part of my take,
Speaker 1
it already felt like we had been doing part for so long. Yeah, it'll be six years in March.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 I've been working for as long as Billy's been alive.
Speaker 1
Yeah. Whoa.
Jesus. Yeah.
Speaker 1
Yeah. That's true.
It's tough in these content minds.
Speaker 1
I know that's true. Yeah.
Huh? That's okay. That's good.
It's true. Like working as a per, like any job? Yeah.
You were like, so you
Speaker 1
dropped out of high school? Yeah, we were. How old are you, Billy? 22.
You were child labor? 22. So when I was 14? Yeah, well, yeah.
Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 1
That still counts as like being a high school kid. I've had jobs.
Yeah. I've been in the workforce.
Right. Since not fully,
Speaker 1
you were a full-time student before. Full-time in the workforce.
It has not been that. I was a student.
Speaker 1 I attended high school and college, but I've been in the workforce. Yeah.
Speaker 1 All right, let's not think about this shit anymore.
Speaker 1 My firefest of the week is I'm jumping out of a, I think, a helicopter now for the Arizona Bowl, and I got the text message from Jen Simons, which I think was confusing with some people.
Speaker 1 It was the second person in the tandem jump has to be under 220 pounds, meaning me.
Speaker 1 The first person is the person who's like the instructor or whatever so I have to get under 220 pounds by the end of the year to not die what are we coming in at these days uh fully naked first thing in the morning 231 ish oh you can do that easy but i'm walking around more at like 235 six seven you can eat just wear a black shirt yeah just wear a black shirt to the waist someone said just have a black parachute You'll be fine.
Speaker 1
Yeah. But yeah, no, this is, I got to do it.
I got to figure out a way to get under 220. Billy, looking at you.
Although, you've already failed Ben Mintz, so forget that. No, I haven't.
No, we're
Speaker 1 working out right after. I saw Ben Mintz.
Speaker 1
He's not fat. He's been losing weight.
He's actually lost weight since we started. I would say that if you're looking for somebody that can make you lose a lot of muscle mass, Billy's your guy.
Yeah.
Speaker 1
Okay. I tried to chose this lost line.
How many vaccines do I need to get? I know a lady, big cat. Ooh.
Speaker 1 Well, I don't want to take your lady. You guys can share.
Speaker 1
Yeah, we can. Oh.
Eskimo boxes. All right.
Billy, you're a Firefest.
Speaker 1 I'm Jake.
Speaker 1 You see what I did there?
Speaker 1 I have two.
Speaker 1 One of them was I was at a bar last week and they just didn't have Coors Light.
Speaker 1
Like, how am I supposed to enjoy myself if there's no Coors Light? I'd leave it. Order a competitor and throw the bottle on the ground and walk out.
That's what I would say.
Speaker 1
But it's still giving money to the competitor. Burn the bar down to the ground.
Yeah. Pinky pink with everyone in it.
And my second one's kind of like a future anxiety thing.
Speaker 1 Sunday,
Speaker 1 the return of you guys just bash me for anything Andrew Ciciliano says. Correct.
Speaker 1
I'm making a resolution this year. I'm going to be nice to Andrew Ciciliano because he's a nice guy.
I'm going to clean slate. Clean slate.
All right. I'll make a resolution as well.
Speaker 1
I will take all the hate that PFT had and I will double my hate. So for Andrew Ciciliano.
Am I screwed on Sunday? Yo, yeah. I just said I'm going to take his hate and double it.
Speaker 1 So that's my Fire Fest, just worrying about what you guys are going to can't say to me. Hold on.
Speaker 1
My Fire Fest is that I just remembered the reason my sleeper sucks so bad is that I didn't have anything written down, but I had it mentally and I forgot to say it. We got another Larry.
Oh, yeah.
Speaker 1 Yeah.
Speaker 1
I meant to mention that in Fancy Fuck Boys. That's okay.
And I just came up with chills. We'll bail him next week.
We'll debut him on Monday, right? On Monday's show.
Speaker 1 He'll make a Monday night pick this Monday, and then he'll have t-shirts and shit, and he'll start making picks, whatever, five a week going forward.
Speaker 1
We almost. Oh, Big Fire Fest.
That's a billy fish. Thank you for reminding me, Jake.
I forgot. I completely forgot what channel the red zone channel is.
I think it's 702 or 703.
Speaker 1
No, but I have a different package than you. Oh, Direct TV is 703.
Yeah, I've got Spectra. I'm so out of sorts.
Usually I take, I go like the week before NFL season starts.
Speaker 1 This is why we need a red zone for the preseason because now I'm panicking because I know that I'm going to forget about it. I'm going to sit down with like 10 minutes left.
Speaker 1
And yeah, I'll get it there on time, but I'm going to miss the countdown clock. And that first countdown clock of the season is awesome when it hits.
Agreed.
Speaker 1 So I got to, somebody remind me, Jake, can you send a reminder to remind me on Saturday to do a red zone dry run? Yes. At 12:50 p.m.
Speaker 1
Do you want me to text you at that time? Yes. Yeah.
All right. I actually have another Firefest too.
Boy, what do you got? The, because I'm such a socks head.
Speaker 1 I've been watching the Red Sox games, and every time I'm scared to get my bill, every time I turn my TV on, turn it off, if I go to the extra innings channel,
Speaker 1 you know what I'm talking about?
Speaker 1
Yep, yep. It doesn't have to reorder it.
Yes, yes, yes. I've done that like 20 times in the past two weeks.
Yep. Every single time, it's like you can't watch.
You have to order a subscription.
Speaker 1
You're going to be in a fight. I've had this happen.
So they're going to charge me.
Speaker 1
They have to see that. I did it like three times, I want to say.
If that's the case, I paid for like legitimately $400 worth of price of fandom. Price of fandom.
That's crazy.
Speaker 1 Seam heads like us.
Speaker 1
Yeah, show up. Do what you got.
You got to do it. All right, Billy, wrap us up.
I was going to sleep one night. I saw a bunch of sirens.
Speaker 1
Well, I saw the lights. And you just ran out to help.
No, I did. First responder.
Speaker 1
No, I looked. down.
Yes, you are Dwight True. No, I looked down the street and I saw like seven or eight cop cars all at one intersection pulled over and I couldn't figure out what was going on.
Speaker 1 Okay, so did you go ask? No, because it was too late and I was in my boxers and I really wanted to know what was going on because it looked like a lot of activity.
Speaker 1
I'm new to the neighborhood, so I don't, didn't have anyone to ask or anything. So Firefest is something that I've been doing.
I literally live a block away from you. Did you know what happened?
Speaker 1 So it might have been,
Speaker 1 I might have been there. I don't know.
Speaker 1 Wait, actually?
Speaker 1 No.
Speaker 1
Have you ever citizen arrested someone? No, but I would like to. Yeah, I know you would.
You absolutely are looking for it.
Speaker 1 Billy, when you were a kid and you got left home alone, did you set up traps throughout your house in hope that burglars would break in? No, but I'd lock all the windows and doors. Pussy.
Speaker 1 Be ready. What kind of guy?
Speaker 1 What kind of kid are you? You'd lock all the doors?
Speaker 1 Yeah, I mean, that's like the, that's the all-time scare moment is a kid being like, uh-oh, what?
Speaker 1 Also,
Speaker 1
I just realized this book has been on the table a whole time, which will be a teaser for upcoming interviews. So subscribe to the YouTube.
Yeah, subscribe to the YouTube.
Speaker 1 And we're going to get the twins right now.
Speaker 1
And PFD is going to pop off those glasses and we're going to see his eyes, his beautiful eyes. Freak eyes.
Yeah. Yeah.
Whoops. That was our mistake.
So yeah, you, great interview coming next week.
Speaker 1 We're like, actually, a really, really good one. It was like an hour long.
Speaker 1 So, if you're listening, if you go subscribe to the YouTube, anyone who's listening right now, go subscribe to the YouTube, please, so PFD can take off his glasses and so you can see who the interview is.
Speaker 1 Also, other Fire Fest
Speaker 1 couldn't get a piranha in time for the
Speaker 1
Piranha would have been good in theory. Yeah, do you have any notes? In practice, very difficult.
Not really because we just talked about it. Yeah, that's fine.
87. All right.
Speaker 1
99. Oh, no, 97.
69. 8.
18.
Speaker 1 66.
Speaker 1 Bobby G.
Speaker 1 Can you turn it on?
Speaker 1
Nope. Nelly Dragon.
He just fucks up. Oh, breaking moves.
Speaker 1
TJ Watt just signed a $112 million extension. Whoa.
Let's go. Steelers big.
Speaker 1 13. Yikes.
Speaker 1 That's pretty much the worst number to get before an entire gambling NFL season.
Speaker 1
It's actually my favorite number. Of course.
I was born on Friday the 13th. Columbus thought manatees were mermaids.
Speaker 1
White on society. Not really born on Friday the 13th.
Love you guys.
Speaker 1 Day,
Speaker 1 come
Speaker 1 me
Speaker 1 needless to say
Speaker 1 I'm all set in
Speaker 1 some
Speaker 1 a little
Speaker 1 way.
Speaker 1 Till I learn what it's okay
Speaker 1 to say
Speaker 1 after me.
Speaker 1 It's the better to be safe, than sorry
Speaker 1 all the things that you say
Speaker 1 all the things that you say
Speaker 1 all the things that you say
Speaker 1 light for
Speaker 1 just the flame of worries away.
Speaker 1 You're all the things I've done to remember.
Speaker 1 You shine away.
Speaker 1 Well, I'll be coming for you anyway.
Speaker 1 Take
Speaker 1 on
Speaker 1 me
Speaker 1 I'll be coming for you anyway.
Speaker 1 Take
Speaker 1 on
Speaker 1 me